#i think separation would hit them very hard. they need to do college together. who’s going to take blair to parties..

[hsslilly-blog]

i want to send blair and payton to the same university. i don’t want to separate them:(

[lumosinlove]

Vaincre

Finals part i

(It's been a long time coommingg... Thanks for sticking with me everyone <3 Ended up splitting this chapter up because it got so long, so the next update will not be in two months, but around two days...)

~

[NHL on ESPN theme song plays and we zoom into a studio desk with Sam Levi, Kevin Becks, and Hank Mairier]

LEVI: Welcome back to NHL on ESPN, we’re in Game One, New York Rangers take on the Colorado Avalanche in Denver, Colorado. I’m Sam Levi here with two who don’t need introduction, Kevin Becks and Hank Mairier. It’s a Rangers alumni studio! What are we thinking, boys?

BECKS: This is going to be a fantastic series, I’m calling it now.

MAIRIER: Absolutely.

BECKS: I mean, the Rangers have acquired some serious fire power this season. The Avalanche is fresh off a whole slew of wins. It’s going to be a fiery one, that’s for sure.

LEVI: Yes indeed. Some top news, MacKinnon back in the lineup after a brief scare. As is Alex O’Hara who was being watched for an upper body injury. He will play tonight, and Montague will get the start. We’re going to go down to the benches where our very own Cassie Baker has Percy Marshall. How’s it going, Cassie?

[Cut to NHL on ESPN logo]

[Cut to Cassie Baker on the New York Rangers’ bench. Percy Marshall is on the ice side of the boards, leaning in to her shot and microphone—He’s wearing no helmet, grinning, and chewing gum]

BAKER: Thanks, Sam. Percy, your team has gone through some changes this season, which include the acquisition of you, and, not one, but two of your old college friends and teammates, Logan Tremblay and Will Morgan. What’s it been like to all play together again and especially to make a run for the Cup?

MARSHALL: Well, aren’t you going to mention you were there, too?

BAKER: I—ha, yes I was there, too. Not playing hockey, though. Could we have imagined this, back then, do you think?

MARSHALL: I certainly would have had high hopes. Seriously, though, it’s amazing to be back with Morgy, Tremz. I mean, wrong O’Hara, but close enough. Accidentally call him Finn all the time. We’ve really pulled together as a group, um, and we’re hoping to start this round off—

[There’s a shout that goes up from somewhere on the ice, a blur of motion, and MARSHALL catches a stray puck in his glove]

BAKER: Oh—Oh my God.

MARSHALL: Whoa there, Baker. Careful out here.

BAKER: I—Thanks. Wow. I…

MARSHALL: Wouldn’t be the first time I saved you, though, would it?

[Marshall skates away before she can reply]

BAKER: [Flustered and smiling] Um. Well, that was eventful, guys. Percy Marshall’s reflexes are obviously game ready. Back to you, Sam.

[Cut back into the studio]

LEVI: What do you think, guys, are we gonna get the story of the first time he saved her?

MAIRIER: Can we see a replay of that? My God.

[Cut to a slow motion replay—Percy Marshall’s gaze moves towards where the puck’s coming from off screen. Cassie Baker flinches into Marshall’s shoulder just as the puck finds Marshall’s glove. Marshall grins, looking down at Baker as he offers her the puck]

BECKS: Wow. That’s amazing, that was really coming for her head! Percy Marshall, life saver.

LEVI: All right, but you know what the funniest part of that is? If you look in the background, you can see Tremblay and Deveaux—two very stoic guys—look, let’s look again.

[The clip replays. In the background, Tremblay and Luke go from worried, to looking at each other before laughing hard]

LEVI: Look at them cracking up! Have you ever seen Luke Deveaux make that face?

BECKS: What, smile? Ha, maybe not often.

~

Logan covered his eyes as he laughed. “Oh God.”

“That was both sort of smooth,” Luke said, then shook his head. “And so awful.”

“Have you met Percy?” Will asked dryly as he slid onto the bench beside Logan.

Logan caught Cassie’s eye through the glass that separated the rink-side media box from the two benches. He shrugged, not sure what else to do, and she held up the puck and mouthed fuck enthusiastically, miming it hitting her head. Beside him, Will pointed at Percy and Cassie discreetly held up her middle finger.

Logan turned back to the ice, smiling. He tapped his glove on Will’s knee. “Ready?”

“As I’ll ever be. Where are the boys at?”

“They’re here,” Logan said. “Decided since it was the finals it was safe for them to actually be here.”

Will snorted. “Safe?”

“Not “Lions betrayal” as Finn says.” Logan rolled his eyes. “I told them they didn’t have to, they could watch from the hotel, but…”

Logan raised his eyes to the steep wall of seats that surrounded them. He wouldn’t be able to pick them out, but knowing they were in the building sent a warm pressure through him.

“Probably sitting with my family,” Will said. “Yours?”

“They’re coming to New York for next game,” Logan said. “Because Finn’s family is also there, we’re going to have a big family dinner at some point. Minus Leo’s parents, but they’ll be at the wedding.”

“The wedding,” Luke chimed in. “Like royalty or something.”

“I mean, technically, yes,” Will said.

That really made Logan laugh.

“It’s true,” Will said. “If you think about it, in our world, Sirius Black…”

“Well, I’ll text the King and tell him what you guys think of him later.” Logan took a final drink of water before standing and throwing one leg over the boards.

~

MCDONALD: Welcome to our coverage of the Stanley Cup Playoff Finals. I’m Sean McDonald here with former Rangers Captain Ryan Connors. What are you thinking, Ryan?

CONNORS: I’m thinking this is going to be a hell of a show. We’ve got big players on both sides.

MCDONALD: That we do. We’ve also got Shay Fanarro between the benches. How’s it looking down there, Shay?

FANARRO: Thanks, Sean. These are two teams who really, really want it. Percy Marshall and Alex O’Hara especially are getting the Rangers bench going. Those are loud individuals—and also leaders. Especially O’Hara. He’s been on this team before, he got his start here when he was just eighteen years old.

[Cut to image of an eighteen year old Alex O’Hara, looking young with his hair shorter than it is now. He’s mid-stride in his first NHL game, wearing number 28]

FANARRO CONT: It’s got to be an emotional night for him, almost like a time warp.

[Cut to a live feed from the ice. Alex O’Hara and Logan Tremblay are stretching on the ice, talking]

FANARRO CONT: There’s O’Hara and Tremblay—of course, not the O��Hara that Logan’s used to! You know, that was such a sudden trade this season from the Gryffindor Lions. And Sean, Ryan, I’ve never been shy about saying that I was not in agreement with that move.

MCDONALD: No, you certainly have not been shy about that, ha! What do you think about that Connor? Trading such a core player mid-season?

CONNOR: I think…I think there must have been a plan. Whether or not that plan paid off or is still in the works would definitely be up for debate—I mean, if we’re looking at it bluntly…Tremblay knocked the Lions out of the play-offs. I mean, ouch.

MCDONALD: Talk about backfiring!

CONNOR: Exactly. The Lions brought in strong D men when they let Tremblay go and that can only make me think that Gryffindor management was thinking about how deep their defensive holes used to run, back in what I know people like the call, you know, the time before Sirius Black came in to captain this team into what it is today. Tremblay was a big part of that turn-around, especially in more recent years. I mean, speaking of old Harvard buddies, you got to know that Tremblay was brought in to play with O’Hara.

MCDONALD: That is, Finn O’Hara, younger brother to Alex.

CONNOR: Exactly, Sean. I mean, those two are magnetic, it almost seems insane to split them up and I think that’s part of the reason why Lions fans had such a strong reaction to losing Tremblay. Feels a bit like a car with two wheels. And it did cost them, I mean, O’Hara—this was not his best season, he looked like a fish out of water for some of it. Tremblay, on the other hand—I mean, he’s fresh off a Cup with Gryffindor so it’s hard to compare but this season with the Rangers has been explosive for him. I’m not saying he was happy about the trade—he’s been quiet about it—

MCDONALD: He’s quiet in general.

CONNOR: He is, he is. He’s been quiet about any bad feelings he’s had towards this trade, but he has played like he can’t lose, it’s incredible to watch. So, great for Tremblay, not so great for the Lions. If I was their GM, I’d be kicking myself quite a bit.

MCDONALD: Indeed. Indeed. All right, we’ll be right back for puck drop, don’t go anywhere.

~

After the game, Logan hissed as he put tentative weight on his knee in the locker room.

“Fuck,” he whispered, reaching down to unwind the tape around his socks.

“Is it bad?” Alex asked.

“How the fuck do I know?” Logan sighed.

“It looked bad.”

“It felt bad.”

Their 4-3 loss didn’t help matters.

“52 took your fucking feet out, didn’t even get called for it,” Luke said. He was half-dressed, pads unstrapped around his chest and hanging loose. “That sucked.”

Him and Alex both considered Logan’s knee as he shed his pants. It was swollen. Not the worst Logan had ever seen, but enough to make the three of them wince.

“Yikes.” Alex reached behind him for his water. “Hey, at least you’re about to get fucking babied to all hell.”

Logan laughed. “Am I?”

“Please.” Luke threw his sweaty towel in Logan’s face. “You know you are.”

Logan just lowered himself back into his stall, stretching his knee out.

“Want ice?” Luke asked.

“Ouais, think so.” Logan framed the worst of it with his fingers. “Thanks,” he called after he realized Luke had already walked away.

Alex was leaning over to see as well. “What are you looking for?”

“I…” Logan shrugged. “Just looking.”

“Can you bend it?”

Tentatively, Logan tried. It felt tight, but it wasn’t all together as painful as putting weight on it was.

“I think if I ice it…” Logan trailed off. “I don’t want to sit. I don’t want coach to take me out.”

Behind him, his phone began to ring. Finn’s name.

Logan held it up to his ear, prodding his knee with his free hand. “Salut. Be out soon, sorry.”

“Are you talking yourself out of being injured right now?” There was a smile in Finn’s voice.

“You got ice on it, honey?” Leo asked.

Luke reappeared, tossing Logan the bag and looking pointedly at the phone.

“They gonna carry you out of here?” he asked. “Calling to check which pillows you prefer?”

Logan gave him a shove, which Luke only returned with a sharp grin.

“Yes,” Logan said to Finn and Leo. “I mean, yes to I do have ice. It’s fine. It just needs to be left alone for a second.”

“Oh yeah.” Finn let out a ha. “Like you’ve ever needed to be left alone in your Logan Tremblay life.”

“I said my knee,” Logan said. He drew his shoulder pads over his head before replacing the phone. “As in I need to keep my weight off it.”

Luke, catching Logan’s eye, pretending to pick Alex up, who proceeded to pretend to jump into Luke’s arms and nearly sending both of them toppling to the ground.

Logan folded the fingers holding his phone until only his middle one remained. “Where are you?”

“We’re in the lounge,” Leo said. “It’s so nice, I mean, they got an espresso bar in here.”

“D’accord,” Logan said. “Going to shower and then I’ll find you.”

There was a rustle, and then Finn’s voice came much closer, whispering right into the speaker. “Save a shower, ride a—”

“Oh my Lord, Finn, not here. See you soon, Tremz,” Leo said, laughing, and the line cut off.

~

[NHL on ESPN theme song plays and we zoom into a studio desk with Sam Levi, Kevin Becks, and Hank Mairier]

LEVI: Welcome back to NHL on ESPN, we’re in Game Four between the New York Rangers and the Colorado Avalanche and we are back here in the big apple. I’m Sam Levi here with Kevin Becks and Hank Mairier. This has been a wild sort of series. Momentum has been swinging back and forth like a wrecking ball—but the Rangers after losing game one, came back and won game two and three. We’ll see how this plays out. Becks, who has been the most noticeable to you on the Rangers’ side of things?

BECKS: That would be a few. Percy Marshall and Will Morgan have an old chemistry that’s hard to beat. Like Tremblay and Finn O’Hara had on the Lions, really, it’s fantastic to see two guys so familiar with each other. Saint Montague—Sebastian—he’s just a brick wall. I mean, we can go back and watch that power play save from last game a million times but it still boils down to Deveaux making a solid play in front of him, and yes, fine, the puck sneaked through, but Saint was there when the Rangers needed him the most. And, I mean, come on, boys we can’t forget Tremblay. I mean, let’s think about it—this is a guy who was all but raised—career speaking—in the company of guys like Pascal Dumais, Kasey Winter, and, of course, his former captain, Sirius Black.

~

Sirius was slightly concerned that Hope Lupin might begin to think he was just a little bit insane. He knew the way he watched Logan play was not exactly normal—especially with the Rangers not being his team and all. He stood without moving until an icing broke the spell. He crossed his arms, uncrossed them when the Avalanche scored and switched to sitting down with his palms pressed to his knees.

From beside him, knitting needles moving in a steady, easy rhythm that Sirius appreciated, Hope laughed.

“Does Logan know how hard you’re rooting for him?”

A TV break began at that moment—which Sirius was grateful for. He wanted to look at her while he spoke to her. He’d been the victim of sentences half-thrown in his direction too many times for his liking.

She looked so much like Remus right then. Sun-gold hair clipped back loosely. Eyebrow slightly arched as she posed a question to him. Sirius glanced in the direction of the kitchen, where he could hear Remus, James, and Lily laughing as they cleaned up dinner.

“I think so,” Sirius said. “It’s not really…I can’t talk to him yet.” He laughed. “I know that sounds stupid.”

“Oh, honey, you’re talking to the wife and mother of Lyall and Remus Lupin. Stupid isn’t the word. Intense, maybe. Faithful. Sweet.” She reached forward for her glass of wine. “Besides, this is quite the series, I don’t blame you. Who’s the handsome one again?”

Sirius frowned. “Ah. Which one?”

Hope laughed. “Oh, yes, that’s true. Oh, there he is—Morgan.”

Sirius looked to where they were showing Will Morgan. “Oh, Morgan. Will Morgan.”

“You know him? He’s playing very well.”

“Not really,” Sirius said. “I’ve never played with him. But he went to college with Logan and Finn. And Percy Marshall, who’s next to him.”

“Well, isn’t that a little class reunion.”

“What’s a class reunion?” Remus had emerged from the kitchen, floor creaking beneath his bare feet. He smiled at Sirius as he crossed in front of the television to fall into the couch cushions beside him. Sirius hadn’t even realized he’d broke his superstitious hold on his knee until his arm was already lifted and Remus was under it, fitting into place.

“Morgan, Marshall, Tremz and Finn—well, not Finn, but sort of.”

“I think it’s funny that Alex is sort-of-Finn to you and all these announcers,” Lily laughed. “If someone called my sister ‘sort of me’ I would actually just drop down a hole somewhere.”

“I mean he’s around, like off the ice,” Sirius said, smiling. “Not that they’re the same person.”

“They’re not twins, right?” Lyall asked, settling beside his wife with a kiss to her head. “They sure do look it.”

“Alex is older,” Remus said. “By…I don’t know, a couple years.”

“Speaking of brothers,” Sirius said. “Where is mine?”

“Talking to some girl on the porch.” Julian came bounding in from the driveway, sweaty and with his roller-blades still in his hand. He thrust them out to Remus. “I think one of the wheels is sticking, what do I do?”

Remus took the skates, spinning the wheels with his hand before setting them on the ground. “I can fix it in the morning, bud.”

“A girl,” Sirius repeated, staring in the direction of the porch.

“Some of us do like those quite a bit.” James, coming in from the kitchen and wiping his hands on his shorts, walked behind the couch. When his hand appeared out of the corner of Sirius’ eye, Sirius couldn’t help it. He flinched, just a little. The second his shoulder raised up, he tried to push it back down again. Remus looked up at him, feeling the way he went tense.

James’ hand, which had indeed been about to tap his cheek, froze. Slowly, he placed his hand on Sirius’ shoulder and squeezed gently.

Sirius turned to look up at him, apologetic, and found an equal apology in James’ face.

“Regulus has a girlfriend?” James asked. “I mean—not to assume anything. Made that mistake before, huh?”

Sirius snorted. “Ouais, you really did.”

When the game came back on, Sirius’ attention kept sliding away. Towards the porch, towards Regulus. Did he flinch like Sirius flinched?

Reading his mind, Remus’ hand smoothed slowly up his chest, giving him time to settle into the motion before it reached his neck. His fingers scratched gently through the hair at his nape, thumb smoothing under his jaw. Sirius closed his eyes briefly, at least until the shouts from the television made them open again to find the Avalanche celebrating. They were about to win this game in an unsettling almost blow out of 5-2.

“Well, damn,” Hope sighed. “New York really is going to make this hard on themselves, huh?”

~

“Hey, Tremblay,” Finn called from the kitchen. “Captain Sirius Black of the Gryffindor Lions is calling you.”

Logan closed the glass shower door. He’d been standing under the spray for a good ten minutes, trying to will all the aches in his muscles away. At Finn’s voice, he looked up from where he’d been rubbing at his damp hair with a towel.

“What?” he called.

“Sirius is calling you,” Leo answered.

Logan wasn’t sure why he ran, but he did. His bare feet slipped just a little on the floor, still damp and probably leaving footprints. He slipped again when he reached the the kitchen counter and nearly took out one of the stools before catching himself and snatching up the phone that was blinking Sirius’ name up at him.

Finn and Leo were laughing so hard they’d turned silent.

“Why did you—run like that?” Finn put his head down into his folded arms on the counter, shoulders shaking.

“You—” Leo gasped through a laugh. “What?”

“Shh,” Logan said. “Shh.” He pressed answer. “Hi? Salut.”

Leo rested his chin on his hands and grinned in an exaggeratedly dreamy way. “Salut.”

Finn had to crouch down behind the counter.

“Salut,” Sirius said, oblivious. He spoke in French. “How are you?”

“I’m being made fun of,” Logan said. He reached forward and pressed a quick thumb into Leo’s left dimple, then yanked his hand back when Leo made to nip at his fingers. “And bitten.”

He could almost feel Sirius’ eyebrows raise. “Should I call back?”

“Non, non,” Logan said. “I’m—you know. Feels stupid, a game like that.”

“You guys were fine, they just outplayed you at the end. Starting Saint next game, do you know?”

“Think so.” Logan took the phone into the bedroom closet, putting it on speaker as he reached for clothes. Sweatpants. He walked over to where Leo’s suitcase lay open and picked out a t-shirt. “Away crowd—he always gets fired up for those, so.”

Sirius didn’t say anything, but Logan could tell he was nodding. Logan waited, nose tucked against the collar of Leo’s shirt.

“How’s wedding planning going?” he asked finally, when Sirius was quiet. He flicked off the closet light, took the phone off speaker, and went back into the living room. Finn was on the couch already, book in hand, and Leo was sitting with his on the floor, back to the sofa, doing something on his computer. Finn’s free hand was in his hair.

Sirius laughed. “It’s good. I mean, for myself, it just matters that Remus is there, but I’ve been told cake and stuff is important.”

“Cake is very important.”

Leo snorted, looking over at him.

“What?” Finn whispered. “What’d he say?” He tightened his fingers a little in Leo’s hair and Leo grinned when he gently pulled his head back to look at Finn upside down. “What?”

“Yeah, I guess,” Sirius said in Logan’s ear. “Hey did you tell them about the cabin yet?”

“Cake is important,” Leo whispered.

Finn pulled a face. “Okay?”

Leo turned, kneeling, and took Logan’s bent knee, gently flattening it along the edge of the couch, pressed up against Finn. He held up a silent finger—one second—and crossed into the kitchen.

“Not yet,” Logan replied. “But soon.” Logan met Finn’s eyes when he curled a warm hand around Logan’s ankle. “It’s going to be amazing. Really, I can’t believe you pulled this off so fast. Oh, hey, we hung out with Reg a few nights ago, he seems good.”

A tisking sound came from behind Leo, and then he appeared, still translating Logan’s French. “Don’t gossip to his big brother!”

“Oh,” Logan said. “I’m not supposed to gossip about him to you, apparently.”

Sirius laughed. “Tell Leo I understand. But you’re right, he does seem good.”

Logan jumped when something cold pressed to his leg, then looked to see Leo carefully molding an icepack to sit comfortably on his knee.

“So, I’m actually calling…” Sirius began.

“Hm?” Logan said. He was half-preoccupied with reaching up to pull a smiling Leo into a kiss.

“I said I wasn’t going to say anything until something was actually—like, accomplished, but I was watching you play and thinking about what happens if this season turns out the way the Rangers want, and I’m thinking about how I could get you home again this summer.”

Leo and Finn couldn’t hear him, but they both looked up before Logan even said anything. He’d tensed, or maybe his face showed something, something like pain, or maybe longing, or surprise. Leo started fussing with the icepack. Finn sat up a little and pulled Logan’s other ankle towards him, draped over his thigh, and settled a hand behind his unbruised knee.

“What?” Finn whispered. “What’s wrong?”

“You…” Logan swallowed. “You’ve been thinking about that?”

“Ouais, so. So basically.” There was the sound of a door slamming somewhere in Sirius’ background, and then a soft rustle of wind against the speakers. “So, there’s really not much more this game can give me in terms of—”

“You’re retiring?” Logan burst out.

Leo gasped, then slapped a hand over his mouth.

“What?” Finn hissed.

“No, no, no,” Sirius said, laughing a little. “No.”

“Oh. Merde, Sirius.” Logan shook his head at Leo, who dropped his head back in relief, hand on his chest.

Finn sat up a little more. “Oh my fucking God, what is he saying?”

Leo gave a half-hearted shrug, watching Logan intently.

“I was going to say money,” Sirius said. “I want to see what management says if I tell them I want to take a pay cut in order to allow you to come back. Or at least open up the options.”

Logan wasn’t sure if he heard right.

“We’ve got a lot of big names on our team. Worthy names,” Sirius continued. “So, it’s not enough if it’s just me. But I wanted your permission to ask something similar of Finn.”

Slowly, Logan raised his eyes to Finn, who snapped his book closed and mouthed silently, frustratedly, what?

“Not Leo,” Sirius said. “It’s so early in his career, I wouldn’t ask that of him. But Finn. Finn could be very helpful towards something like this. And he loves you—I mean, we both know how much that—what does Natalie say? That freckle loves you.”

Logan felt his brow furrow, though he knew Sirius had meant for him to laugh. He stared at Finn. Those brown eyes. Helpful. Could he ask something like that of Finn? He already knew Finn would say yes in half a heartbeat, but could he ask? It was his career. It was his life, he deserved every single part of it. Logan had once been willing to give Finn up entirely so Finn could get what he had worked so hard for.

“Okay,” Finn whispered harshly. He looked a truly upset now. “I really can’t do the silent looks while on the phone. I really can’t do it. Logan. Speak English right fucking now.” He dropped the whisper. “Talk to us right now, I can’t do this.”

“Is that Finn, too?” Sirius asked.

“Sorry, yes.” Logan reached out and took Finn’s hand, kissing his palm. He switched to English. “Sorry, I should have told you, not on speaker or anything, but Finn can’t understand me, um…Okay, hold on. Can I…”

“Call me back whenever you want,” Sirius said. “I really didn’t mean to—ah, throw it on you, I just…”

Sirius lapsed into one of his long silences again. Finn and Leo were staring at him, Leo a little nervously glancing towards Finn, whose ears and cheeks were pink, his mouth set into an unhappy frown. He didn’t pull away from Logan, though.

“I just…I want you to win.” Sirius’ laugh shuddered a little. “I want the Rangers to win, I really, really fucking do, because I wonder if that make them see it like they got what they wanted from you…and as stupid and senseless as it sounds, maybe they’d give you back.”

Logan wanted to stare at the phone where the words had came from after Sirius hung up, but he tossed it down, letting it get lost in the cushions, and took both of Finn’s hands in his own.

“Rouge. I’m sorry. Come here, everything’s fine.” He brought his knuckles to his mouth, then reached forward a put a hand against one of his cheeks—he was hot to the touch. “Finn. Everything’s fine.”

Logan set the icepack on the table, drawing his legs in to give Leo more room to settle against Finn’s side. Finn let out a long breath and pushed his face against Leo’s neck.

“Oh, sweetheart,” Leo said, rubbing Finn’s back. “Jesus, Lo, you gave him a nervous fever practically.”

“I’m sorry,” Logan said. “I didn’t—Sirius surprised me. Finn, I’m sorry. Finn?”

“I’m not mad,” Finn said. “I just…Fuck. I don’t know, I couldn’t understand what you were saying and last time you were looking at me like that and a phone was involved…”

“Here’s what we said.” Logan scooted forward so Finn and Leo’s outer thighs bracketed him. He settled his hands on theirs. “It’s not—Sirius wants to try to get me back on the Lions.”

Finn lifted his head. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, but said nothing.

Leo, though, just let out a long, exhausted breath and closed his eyes. “Thank God.”

Leo looked flushed now, like the mere thought of it had set his heart pounding. He rubbed a hand over his chest and looked at Logan. “Fuck. What else did he say?”

Logan, still staring at the pink of Leo’s cheeks set against his blue eyes, fumbled over a few sentence starts.

“Well. C’est—It’s a lot. He wants to take a salary cut.” Logan looked to Finn. “And he was hoping you’d do the same, Rouge.”

“Yes,” Finn said instantly. “Fucking yes. Yes, they can pay me ten fucking dollars a month, see if I care. In fact, I don’t need money actually.”

“Finn,” Leo laughed.

“That wasn’t me asking,” Logan said. “That was me telling you what Sirius said, I—I can’t ask you to do that.”

“But you know we would,” Leo said.

Logan smiled slightly, shaking his head. “Those are your careers.”

“And you’re our life,” Finn said. “Don’t you go telling me I wouldn’t chose you over hockey, you know I would, Lo. You know I would have when I first met you, and you know I would now.”

“It’s not even him over hockey,” Leo said. “It’s a pay cut.”

“And it’s not about choosing, it was never about choosing,” Logan said—then realized what a lie that was. What an old, habit of a lie. “I mean…”

“Yeah-huh,” Finn said. “For a second there, it was.”

“Ouais. Fuck, okay, but I would never have let you do that,” Logan said.

Finn looked at him for a long moment, then nodded minutely. Logan didn’t like that this was still hard for them to talk about.

“Sirius wouldn’t have you be one of the players to take one,” Logan said to Leo. “He said so. And I wouldn’t either, Le, you’re worth a—a contract that is incredible, you’re worth everything—”

“Maybe I want to,” Leo said, chin up. “If it’ll get you home, maybe I’ll tell them to take it all back and give me an entry level salary. What the hell is all that compared to…” Leo sighed. “Lo, I would do anything if you could come back. I know we’re figuring it out and I know we’re better for it, but—I mean, can we make it work if you’re in New York next year? Well, yeah. But that’s not what I want.”

“Of course it’s not,” Logan said. “I know that.”

Leo let out a huff of a breath. “So—then—I just…” Leo’s lip trembled a bit through a smile and he reached out to brush a hand through Logan’s damp hair. “I want you home so bad. So badly. Distance is… Look at your beautiful face, you’re not made for distance. I’m not. We’re not. You’re Logan Tremblay, and I need you close to me.”

Logan caught his hand before it got too far away.

“I know we haven’t done the distance for a whole season yet,” Leo continued. He turned to Finn and passed a hand through his read hair. “And—I know it’s going to get really hard. I mean, it’s a really long time.”

“Don’t say that,” Finn said softly.

“It’s true, honey,” Leo said. He brushed a thumb under Finn’s eye at the high of his freckled cheek. “It’s okay, it’s just true.”

“Compromise,” Logan said. “Okay? Ready?”

“Comprom-ise,” Leo corrected gently. “But you’re right, we should say it like ‘promise’ and, yes, I’m ready.”

“Compromise.” Logan liked the way Leos’s eyes narrowed at the imitation of his accent. That nice, slow ‘I’ sound.“If Sirius even begins to pull this off, and if he needs you, then okay.”

“Deal,” Leo said. He leaned forward and kissed Logan, once and sealing. “Now, cheer Harzy up.”

Finn was indeed sitting very still. He was laid back, messing with the corner of his book, gently ruffling the pages with his thumb.

Logan gave Leo his spot on the sofa and knelt on the rug beside the couch. He did as Leo had, taking Finn’s face gently in his hands and turning Finn’s eyes to his.

“Look at me.” He swiped his thumbs over the warm, flushed parts of his cheeks. “Regarde moi, look at me.”

Brown. The richest brown.

“It’s you,” Logan said. He carded his fingers through Finn’s hair, dropped his palm to rub gently against his back. “It was you in the ocean, when I couldn’t say it, and it’s you now, when I will say it to everyone who will listen to me.”

Finn let that sit for a moment. He closed his eyes like it was sun to bask in. He let the pressure of Logan’s touch tilt his head back slightly.

“I know that,” he whispered. “I just thought something was wrong. I thought you weren’t telling me.”

Logan let Finn’s forehead rest against his shoulder and looked at Leo. He was watching them with a soft expression, his elbow slung on the couch’s arm, temple against his fist. Logan kept his eyes on him, even as he felt Finn’s hand flatted over his chest, like he wanted to touch where Logan felt most. He kept his eyes on Leo as he covered Finn’s hand with his own.

“You know that, whatever happens next season, I’m going to be here for you this time.”

The tips of Finn’s fingers dug into Logan’s chest. he saw Leo’s chest rise sharply with a surprised inhale.

“I don’t care how far away I am,” Logan said. “I would drive through ever single night. I’m going to be here for you whenever you need me.”

Logan knew they needed to hear them. And he’d said it to them before, in different ways. But this, hearing them when he was right here, just the three of them, pressed so close together, felt different. Heavier. True.

“Even if you don’t need me,” Logan said. “I’m there.”

“Don’t need you,” Finn repeated, the words heavy with utter disbelief and so soft that Logan wasn’t even sure Leo heard him. He pushed his forehead harder into Logan’s shoulder, huffing out a breath like something hurt.

“You’re not gonna shut us out again,” Leo said.

Logan shook his head. “Non.”

“When it gets hard,” Leo said. “When we can’t see each other for weeks at a time—”

“You’ll get so sick of your phone ringing, you’ll want to throw it away,” Logan said.

“There…” Leo pressed his lips together and sat up. He put his hands on Finn’s bent knees and Finn straightened them, nearly cradling Leo between his thighs. Logan felt Finn turn his head to look at him. “I was comparing this year’s schedule. Earlier on, there are weeks when both teams are on the road one after another, us, then you—”

“Every morning,” Logan said. “I call you every morning.”

Leo shook his head. “The time zones don’t always—”

“Leo,” Logan cut him off softly. “I promise you.”

Leo’s mouth pulled to the side.

“I won’t shut you out,” Logan said softly. “Ever again.”

“Or Harz,” Leo said. “No matter what happens?”

“Or Harz,” Logan said. He turned down to look at Finn. “No matter what.”

Logan wasn’t sure he could have explained it if someone asked him to. All the ways he’d found a new home, and all the ways he felt like he’d never quite be home again, not until they were in the same city. How he didn’t completely know if he would survive next season without them.

“I’ve been so focused on making it around this year,” Logan said softly. “I mean—non, what is it?”

“Through,” they answered in unison.

“Through this year. And then Sirius just went and talked about how maybe I could…come home. And I realize—I realize that there’s a real chance that I can’t.”

He looked at Finn and he was watching him drive away again from the OKN house. He looked at Leo and he was being yanked back from the elevator and into his arms.

“I could be in New York for the rest of my career, or somewhere even farther, any of us could—” Logan said in French to Leo, then closed his eyes and, in English, “I could be in New York for the rest of my career—”

Finn leaned forward and pulled Logan up the way he knelt in front of them. He pressed his palms to the back of Logan’s thighs, pushing him down onto the couch, his back against Leo’s chest, before leaning forward to hover over him. Logan’s breathing hitched at the easy way Finn moved him, handled his body.

“And you’ll be ours…” Finn settled into the V of Logan’s thighs. Leaning on one forearm, sunk into the cushions, he took Logan’s chin between his fingers and pulled him into a hard kiss, running his tongue along Logan’s lower lip until they could meet. Logan’s world began to tilt in that slow way, especially when he felt Leo’s mouth press to his neck. “For the rest of our lives.”

Leo’s arms went tight around his waist, low on his stomach. Large, warm palms holding Logan’s hips as surely as Finn’s body pressed down on his.

“I’m trying to comfort you,” Logan groaned.

“The rest of our lives,” Finn said again against his mouth. He pulled back with a last kiss, and then Logan was blinking up and watching Finn’s pale throat and jaw move as he kissed Leo. Flashes of tongue, teeth when Leo smiled, and the feeling of Leo going slack and sinking into the cushions beneath him. Logan put a hand on Finn’s jaw, feeling the way he kissed, and then behind Leo’s neck, arching his back upwards until his mouth could reach the underside of Leo’s jaw. The position, though slightly awkward, pressed his chest against Finn’s and caused Leo to break his kiss to catch Logan’s mouth—a lopsided kiss that Logan chased.

“Mm…” Leo mumbled. Because Finn was there, too, bringing his mouth to both of theirs. It startled Logan for a moment—only a moment. And then he was lost in it. He was turned in a way that, had they not both been grasping hands around his back, he would have fallen, and he knew he was doing very little to support himself anyhow. He traded one of their mouths, their tastes, for another without even having to turn his head. It wasn’t even a trade. Both of them, at once. Their warm skin, breath, and teeth, at once. He lost his breath enough that he had to look, had to see. Leo’s fair eyelashes fluttered, brows drawn together at Finn’s kiss—and then he was turned slightly, hardly at all, and Logan found himself lost all over again.

“Fuck,” Finn breathed, and Logan realized his grip on him had been reduced to only his sweatshirt. “Wait, wait, Lo, c’mere—”

Logan was kept from falling from the couch only by Leo’s quick hands. His arms scooped around Logan’s waist again and held fast.

“Ah,” Finn whispered, pressing himself forward to get at Leo’s neck. His arm secured itself around Logan’s waist, too. “Nice save, One.”

Leo’s blue eyes opened from where they’d closed in pleasure, delighted. “You’ve never called me that before.”

“One and ten makes eleven,” Finn said, pulling back to look at them. “Which…I can’t think of a reason for right now because that was…” Finn’s smile was one of Logan’s favorites—sharp, though his eyes held the glass of arousal. “Really, really hot.”

“Why did we stop?” Logan asked.

“You were falling off the couch,” Leo replied, laughing.

“We could have all fallen to the floor and continued.”

Leo clicked his tongue twice, smiling and taking Logan’s chin in his hand. He saw Finn’s smile out of the corner of his eye and let him hook Logan’s leg up around his waist.

“That’s why you are rarely in charge,” Leo whispered. He brushed their lips together, tongue darting out to trace Logan’s lower lip. “And why you have the two of us to catch you,” His eyes went soft, no longer talking about the sofa or the floor or the kiss, “when you feel like you’re going to fall.”

Finn exhaled slowly from beside them. He tilted his chin forward and Leo kissed him gently before turning back to Logan.

“And you for us,” Leo whispered. “No matter what happens.”

“You’re there,” Finn said. “You’re there for us, Lo. You’re so there for us, you sit there and torture yourself when you haven’t been.”

Logan couldn’t help the laugh that spilled out of him. He let his head fall back against Leo’s shoulder. He reached up and back, tangling his fingers in Leo’s hair.

“I love you,” Logan said in French, then realized, but Finn merely smiled.

“That one I got,” Finn said.

“Okay, come here,” Leo said, and heaved Logan so that he was on his other side in the stability of the couch and their bodies again. “There.”

“Wanna hear something funny?” Finn asked.

Leo and Logan looked at each other, then laughed.

“Sure, Harz,” Logan said. He sat up a little until he could wrap an arm around Leo’s shoulders and turn his face into his hair.

“Any time a book in school had a character, figure, whatever, that started with L, my essays that I’d turn in would always accidentally have Logan in there instead at least twice.” Finn curled a palm around the back of Logan’s neck. “One class, I did it so much, the professor wrote, okay, who is this? in the margins.”

Leo’s laugh tilted his head back. “Oh Lord, I can see that clear as day.”

Logan on the other hand felt stunned. “I didn’t know that.”

Finn just grinned. He turned his gaze towards Leo “Little did they know, I’d have two Ls. Jokes on them, I’ll never see that letter the same again.” Finn was still smiling as his eyes closed and let his weight go against Logan’s chest. Leo, beneath them both, made a content sound. “That letter…That letter is my heart, that’s what it is.”

~

We’re back in Colorado boys, and the Rangers look like they’re staging a third period come-back to finish off Game Five of the Stanley Cup playoffs—either that, or we’re in for a very tense over time.

Tremblay—God he’s playing like a man on a mission. Did this somehow turn into a Game Seven when I wasn’t looking? He’s on the puck like he’s going to win it all tonight!

And with a nose he keeps having to get stopped up at the bench. That was quite a fight with Henderson, but that’s what happens when you get into the blue paint. Tremblay’s always been a goalie defender, if I ever saw one. All right, Rangers face-off win and it’s brought around by O’Hara, now to Marshall. Picked off by the Avalanche captain—oh! Back on Tremblay’s tape. Oh, this stadium doesn’t like his skills one bit. Pass up the ice, O’Hara, that was close! Hit the post. Tremblay, racing, step behind, finds the scramble for the re-bound, and he scores!

What do you say? I say come-back complete and I’m ready for a Game Six in New York to close this for good. The New York Rangers are one game away from becoming Stanley Cup champions.

~

“I thought you said you weren’t going to tell him yet,” Remus said. His voice was a little strained, his hands high above his head as he fastened a delicate row of lights, small bobble ones all spaced out along their dark chord, to one of the posts they’d erected by the dock.

“I don’t know what happened, I was just suddenly telling him.” Sirius rested with one elbow on his knee, looking down at the boards he was laying for a makeshift dance space along one square of the beach. It wasn’t big, but Sirius only had one dance planned. He was half-wondering how much dancing would distract everyone else while he stole Remus away. “I called him to talk about playoffs, if he was as hurt as I thought he was, that hit to his knee…and then I was suddenly saying how I could maybe get him home.”

Remus eased himself down the ladder, jumping the last two rungs. “And he said?”

“He wanted to talk to Finn and Leo.”

Remus nodded. “Well, that makes sense.” He knelt down near Sirius, knocking his knuckles on the wood—or, plastic, maybe. It was a hard, durable material at least. “Lily keeps asking me what I’ll do if it rains.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow. “What you’ll do?”

Remus laughed. “We. But don’t lie, if we could say our vows only to each other and then just throw a big dinner party, you wouldn’t say yes, but you wouldn’t say no, either.”

Sirius straightened a little, elbow resting over his thigh. “You think I don’t want to dance all night with you right here?”

Remus pressed his palms to the makeshift floor, examining it. “I think you want to be with me all night, but I know you don’t want to dance.”

Sirius watched as Remus got up again, going back to his ladder, this time to hang the banner he and Lily had been working on. A painted S & R. Sirius watched him manage the fabric carefully, admiring their initials beside each other. Remus tilted his head back to consider the side of the house. It drew his shoulders back and bunched his t-shirt where they met strongly at the top of his spine.

Sirius could have lived in a loop of this. Wake up. Run. Breakfast with everyone. Swim. Lunch. Swim. Dinner that they all cooked together, too many people in the kitchen, Lily getting lime juice in her eye and James kissing her red cheeks. Harry on Sirius’ hip, babbling into his shoulder and looking at Remus as he talked gibberish to them. Regulus and Julian coming in sweaty from playing street hockey in the driveway, Sirius not quite getting up the courage to ask about any late night phone calls taken on the porch.

Yes. There had been a time when Sirius would have taken something quiet over a party with speeches and audiences watching rings being exchanged. Back when parties meant smiling and agreeing, and speeches meant performing so his parents could boast, and audiences only asked him questions rather than let him talk, and and rings caused cuts that stung for days.

And kitchens were places kept out of sight, and kisses were lipstick to be wiped away, and holding a baby against him meant someone else had to endure his terrible, terrible world, and you didn’t play hockey in the driveway, you went to the rink at five and ran drills until seven.

Sirius rose from the new ground he had lay, and walked across it to where Remus was draping the banner over the top of the ladder, ready to climb. Before he could, Sirius caught him by his hips and stepped closed to him from behind. He set his mouth on the tanned and freckled skin of his neck.

“Yes, I do,” Sirius said against him. “I do want to dance with you.”

Remus leaned back against him. His hand covered Sirius’. “Oh, baby, I didn’t mean—I didn’t mean that in a bad way at all.”

“It doesn’t matter how you meant it, I’m just telling you.”

“I mean, I’d marry you in a deserted—uh, desert. I’d marry you in a courthouse or in the locker room, like between play-off games, if that was how this all worked out, I’d—”

“You know, when you’re around your mom, your sentences become twice as long.”

Remus laughed and turned in Sirius’ arms to lay his hands on his chest. “You don’t want to dance in front of everyone. I know you.”

“D’accord.” Sirius put his hands on either side of Remus’ face. “So, yes, it’s not my first choice of things to do in my free time.”

“I just meant that I…I know you,” Remus said. “That’s all.”

“But you want to dance,” Sirius leaned down to brush a kiss to his mouth. “You want banners and lights and a dance floor. Cake, flowers…”

“I want you.”

Sirius smiled, shaking his head. “Yes. But you want banners, lights, dancing, cake, flowers, and all the rest, and so that’s what you’ll have.” Sirius took step back, drawing Remus with him. “You’re never going to miss anything ever again.”

Remus’ eyes fell down to their feet, which Sirius had begun moving in a slow, synchronized circle. “Tall order.”

“Just watch me make it happen.”

Remus put his arms around Sirius’ neck, letting himself fall into Sirius’ slow dance. “Competitive.”

“But you already knew that.” Sirius drew one of Remus’ hands into his own and guided him into a spin, before pulling back against his chest. “Did you know I was forced through dance lessons?” Before Remus’ face could fall even a little, Sirius guided them into a turn, their arms crossed lightly one way, then the other. “I don’t think it ever occurred to them that I’d use it to dance at my wedding to my husband.”

Slowly, feeling his way back to ease through Sirius’ true smile, Remus let himself be spun again, and when his face came back into Sirius’ view, his smile was true, too.

“Best use in the world, I think—oh my God, you can dance? I’m gonna make a fool out of myself, Jesus. But, I don’t—” Remus broke out in a laugh as Sirius spun him again. “Are you trying to disorient me?”

“I’m trying to show you how good I am at everything. Including giving you everything you’ve ever wanted.”

When Remus laughed, Sirius added it to the loop where he wanted to live. This summer, and that sound.

“Shut up,” Remus sighed, putting his arms around Sirius’ neck again. He let them sway. “All I am saying is that I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to do. I don’t care how much I want it.”

“And all I’m saying is that I used to wonder how long I had before it looked weird that I didn’t have a girlfriend. Wasn’t getting married. And now I have my boy who wants to dance at our wedding…”

Sirius thought about dipping him, he could, but he wanted to keep him close. The setting sun cast Remus’ skin in pinks and oranges, and it occurred to Sirius, so suddenly and all-at-once that it nearly made him lose the rest of his sentence, that this was what Remus would look like when he said yes to the rest of their lives.

“You…” Sirius found his voice tight. “You think that I am going to do that?”

“Oh—” Remus pressed forward. “God, come here.”

No sooner had Remus’ mouth found his, than music was blasting through the new speakers—the beginning chords of Back In Black. Remus jumped, nearly biting Sirius’ lip.

“Jesus fuck,” Remus cursed.

“James,” Sirius shouted, looking towards the house.

All he was met with was a cackle.

“Try again!” Regulus’ voice answered them.

[seeingteacupsindragons]

Hello....Do you mind if I ask your top 5 (or top 10) favorite moments from any media that you love (books, anime/manga, tv series, movies, games, etc)? Thanks if you want to answer. Sorry if I ask too much....

Ah, I don't think I can do favorite moments. How about "Moments that overloaded me so much I needed to stop short and process"? Because favorite or not, these ones all impacted me very deeply.

1. That bit in Noragami Aragoto when Yukine sacrifices his name for Yato's safety and becomes a Blessed Vessel.

Look, I had to pause the show for about 20 minutes when watching it for the first time because I was so Overcome. I was watching with my little brother, and he had the same reaction. We spent the twenty minutes incoherently making noises at each other in the middle of the night until we could finally calm down enough to continue.

Something about how far Yukine came from a frustrated, sullen kid who was acting out because he had been hurt and traumatized so badly, to willing to give up everything for the person who risked everything for him was just. Wow. Wowwww. 1000/10 character arc.

2. This moment toward the end of The Furies of Calderon when Tavi had messed something up and his uncle wasn't speaking to him, and he had gone so silent and cowed, and Amara was like, "Huh, I've seen actual abuse, but this hurt this kid so quietly?"

Because all I could think of was how I knew exactly what it was like to make a small mistake trying to help someone else and lose everything for it because of the way my parents acted, even though absolutely no one understood what it would mean for me or that my parents would not forgive.

I cried. I don't know if I was supposed to? But I did.

3. Viktor launching himself at Yuuri to kiss him in episode 7 of Yuri!!! On ICE

I watched this one live, so there was no need to pause the show or anything to process. But I do remember around that point in the episode, I stood up and spent the credits/etc. raking my hand through my hair, pressing my lips together, trying to hold it together because What did I just see?

I then frantically DM'd all my friends to message me immediately after they'd seen the episode, and then went for two separate runs in November in the Upper Midwest without a jacket, trying to settle whatever I was. Doing. Emotionally.

Ahhhhh!!!!

Ahhh!

4. Toward the end of Trick of the Light when Zeke and Griffin confessed to finally having got together

Because back in high school when I was reading this, I had spent the entire book shipping them and telling myself it was a proper urban fantasy novel, not a romance novel, it wasn't a schlocky BL manga, of course they weren't going to--WHAT? THEY DID???

I screamed. I threw the book (library book. Ooops!). I was mad, but at myself, but why, that was the environment I had been lead to believe in? But? No.

5. The end of the last episode of the Nabari no Ou anime.

When I tell you I cried. I cried for, legitimately, hours. A friend and I had stayed up almost all weekend in college shotgunning the series, it was 10am on Sunday morning after having not slept all night, I went back to my dorm room after starting my sobbing session, and could not sleep, because oh my God.

I don't usually cry to visual media. It doesn't usually hit as hard. Yoite....Yoite brought me to pieces.

6. Jeff getting outed in volume 10 of The Case Files of Jeweler Richard

I'm pretty sure I kept suffering through machine translation of the novel after that, but my brain was still focusing on processing...that...Jeff...was gay. I don't think I stayed up much longer that night. Because. Because. BECAUSE.

Lots more, probably, but this is my most memorable ones for right now.

Laters!

[darpow]

MERROCK TASK #24 ALL ABOUT LOVE 🩷

A LITTLE ABOUT LOVE

What does love mean to you? I think that I'm still figuring that out, day by day. But it means feeling like you trust someone copletely, and like they understand you in ways other people don't.

When is the first time that you can remember experiencing love? Being around my entire family.

Who is the very first person that you ever loved? My dad.

How many relationships have you been in? Two.

Has love ever gotten you into trouble? Not really, no.

Has love ever gotten you out of trouble? No.

Do you show your love through grand or small gestures? More of a small gestures kind of guy, I think.

How do you feel about saying ‘I love you’? Is it easy for you, or hard? It's not really that easy for me, but when I get to that point, I think it just becomes a natural thing.

Is there a difference between loving someone and being in love with them? If so, what is it? Yeah, but I couldn't tell you what it is -- because it's different for everyone. It's a feeling.

Do you love yourself? Sometimes.

HEARTBREAK & THE DOWNSIDE

Have you ever had your heart broken? Just for a little while.

Have you ever broken someone’s heart? No.

What is the worst break-up that you’ve experienced? Neither of my break-ups were particularly bad, one was pretty sad, when we realized we would have to go our separate ways because we wanted different things.

What is the best break-up that you’ve experienced? Well, the other one, obviously.

How do you typically handle a break-up? Fine, I guess? I just hit the gym.

Have you ever cheated on someone before? No.

Have you been cheated on? No.

What’s your go-to movie, song, food or activity that you need to get through a break-up? Again, gym.

Have you ever been married and experienced divorce? Or something similar? No, thank God.

Did your last relationship end well? We're still friends! It was sad, but the right decision, so yes.

I’M IN LOVE

What is your current relationship status? I think we're mostly still figuring all the details out, but we're in that place where she's mine and I'm hers and that's all that matters.

How long have you been with your partner? Oh, we're brand new! We just got together last minute.

Are you… y'know, in love? It's early, calm down. But I do have some big feelings for her.

What are your plans for the future? I might ask her out for dinner soon. I know. Risky.

How did your relationship begin? As friends, like all good romances. And then we just sort of hung out more and more and kissed on New Year's Eve and decided to stop tiptoeing around and make it somewhat official.

Are you the big spoon or the little spoon? Hehe! ... is this a real question? I'm tall.

What is your favorite thing about your partner? Her puns. I love that she challenges me. Sometimes it's my smarts, sometimes it's just to dance in the middle of the ocean, and sometimes it's to step outside of my comfort zone and become a better person.

How do you say you’re sorry after a fight? We haven't gotten that far yet, but I think it involves shoes.

Do you co-habitate? Do you hope to someday, or like your own space? No! I think that's one of those discussions for a little bit further down the road.

Do you have kids? Any thoughts of having them in the future? Again, down the road. I've never really thought all that seriously about it since it was never something I had to think about.

THE SPICY STUFF

Do you enjoy sex? I'm honestly not a highly driven sexual person, but I enjoy sex when it's with the right person, sure.

How long have you been sexually active? College.

If you have a partner, do you have a healthy, active sex life? A gentleman never divulges.

If you are single, are you still sexually active with others?

Are you the casual sex type, or do you need a relationship? I'm a relationship guy, I definitely need the commitment and the trust and that comes with that.

What kind of lover do you consider yourself to be? I'm gentle and kind, and very giving.

Are you adventurous in the bedroom, or do you keep it tame? Pretty tame, yeah.

Sex toys in the bedroom? Can't say that I've ever used them before.

Have you ever had sex in public? No.

How many partners have you had? A very, very small amount.

FUN STUFF ABOUT LOVE

What is your favorite love song? Literally anything by the classics, you can put on some good Marvin Gaye or Otis Redding and always be put in the mood for romance.

Favorite romantic movie? Love & Basketball.

Best date that you have ever been on? Valentine's Day of this year. Obviously. Although the pizza making excursion was ... unique.

What’s a meal that says 'I love you’? I'm really not picky about this, because if someone takes the time to make me a meal, that's more than enough for me.

What type of valentines would you send out if you were in school? Whatever was popular at the time, since I wanted to kind of fit in. Or sports, I went with a lot of sports.

Favorite Valentine’s day candy? Literally anything with chocolate. I keep a bag of those milk chocolate Dove pieces in my desk.

Who was your first celebrity or “famous’ crush? Brandy, Denzel. Tyra Banks! Iman. Naomi Campbell, Tyrese.

How do you feel about Valentine’s Day? I kind of like it now.

Do you decorate for Valentine’s Day / the season? I don't, no. But I help Aisha and Tamika with whatever they want to do!

What are your Valentine’s day plans? Doing as much as possible around town and we did the coastal package together.

[quickdeaths]

Spell out your url using characters you love from any media. then, tag as many people as there are letters in your url ( or however many you'd like ! ) inspired by the song titles dashboard game.

Q - Qiu Tong, Tamen de Gushi. Ngl, finding a character with a Q name was tough haha. Qiu Tong is a good choice tho, both for how big TdG was in my circles when it was at its peak, and the sad story of what happened to it. Free my girls!

U - Utena Tenjou, Revolutionary Girl Utena. Utena is too hard to watch to be my favorite anime, but I do think it's kind of the perfect anime, and I will truly never be free from taking inspiration from Utena herself when making characters.

I - Itto Arataki, Genshin Impact. My girlfriend played Genshin Impact and I was thinking about picking it up, but I wasn't totally sure, and then I saw this guy. History made.

C - Claire François, I'm In Love With The Villainess. I love the villainess genre, absolutely oversaturated with slop though it may be. This one is a fave, and what I like about Claire is that she has multiple arcs. So many examples of this genre use isekai or reincarnation explanations to sand off the rough edges, and while I think Claire is very sympathetic, the light novels show that she has to prove her good intentions and overcome her prejudices.

K - Kotori Minami, Love Live! She's not the strongest character, really, but I just like her a lot. Love Live! meant a lot to me when I was like, 21-22.

D - Dale Cooper, Twin Peaks. Gosh what a performance, huh? I was obsessed with this show in college, and the absolute weirdo energy brought to this character has never left my brain. I really gotta watch the new season.

E - Edelgard von Hresvelg, Fire Emblem: Three Houses. She's not my fave FE3H character, but I do like her a lot, and unfortunately the discourse around her is the clearest portrait I've ever seen of fandom misogyny. The double-standards, the flattening of motivations, the lack of credit or benefit of the doubt that male characters got easily, it's all there. Edelgard they could never make me hate you.

A - A2, NieR: Automata. This is a stand-in for her, 2B, and 9S, honestly. NieR: Automata is one of my all-time faves, with a story that I loved the whole way through. For me, they are "frequently bought together, do not separate them," but A2 is the only one whose name actually starts with a letter, so she gets the honor.

T - Tahani Al-Jamil, The Good Place. This is kind of another "ensemble" pick since it is hard to choose, although Tahani might be my favorite of the main four cast. I don't watch a ton of TV, but I honestly devoured this whole show in like... maybe three weeks? I love the characters, and I loved the story, and while The Office and Parks and Recreation never really hit for me, this definitely did. With Tahani specifically, it helps that I love Jameela Jamil.

H - Hanabi Yasuraoka, Scum's Wish. This is a hard manga to recommend, and Hanabi is a hard character to love, but it lined up for me at a time where I needed to read things about characters who weren't great people but still deserved the hope that the could be better. Fun fact, an article I wrote about my relationship to the anime for a website is, I believe, the first time I was ever paid for my writing.

S - Saeko Sawatari, How Do We Relationship? I could honestly talk about Sae forever. HDWR is maybe my favorite romance manga of all time, and Sae is relatable to me in ways I find affirming and representative, and also deeply uncomfortable. Sometimes I'll be reading normally, and then Sae will say something that feels like the kind of thing I'd write in a diary and then throw into the ocean strapped to fifty pound weights due to being too honest and vulnerable. I can't explain all the things that I see reflected back at myself from her, and honestly, I probably wouldn't want to. All I can say is that she's such a special character to me.

Tagged by: @more-than-a-princess

Tagging: Normally I would tag people, but I did just do a dash meme recently and also tags are like busted for some reason for me like what's up with that. If you want to do it, though, I think you should and you can say I tagged you and it'll be our secret.

[lipstickstainz]

mismatched socks - s. r.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

Request: Spencer's girlfriend (reader, FBI agent too) always wears mismatched socks and when they have their first night together at his apartment he notices, and his brain goes to mush, and falls in love with her even more

Warnings: fluff, some talk about Spencer being insecure Word Count: 2.2k A/N: thanks for the request, love! I really enjoyed writing it! requests are open guys! hope you enjoy. gif not mine.

Spencer had always known he was different. He had always been the smartest in school, which could be attributed to his eidetic memory. He wasn't invited to birthday parties because he liked to tell facts that were funny to him, but that no one else found funny. And he had been rather an oddball in other ways, too.

All his life this fact had made him insecure. He thought of himself as too skinny, too unathletic-especially when he compared himself to Derek, which was pretty stupid, of course-and his hair always lay funny, no matter how hard he tried to tame it. He wore cardigans over shirts-the watch over the cardigan, of course-which was pretty weird, but he wore Converse with them and two different socks every day. He loved magic and physics jokes. Spencer couldn't talk about the latest episode of Greys Anatomy, and he wasn't sure what Team Stefan and Team Damon were. Spencer didn't fit in perfectly anywhere and it had taken him time to accept that. He also never imagined anyone would find in attractive, or even want to be with him.

Until you came along.

On your first day at BAU, he immediately noticed three things about you. First, you walked incredibly fast, actually too fast to just walk from one office to the next. It seemed to her as if you were flying. Second, you tucked your hair behind your ears every few minutes, even when it wasn't falling in your face. He wondered why you didn't use a pin or a scrunchie. But it was a habit that didn't bother him in the least. From the moment he first saw you, he found you irresistibly pretty, and he was glad your hair didn't cover your face. And third, you could write ambidextrously. As the team sat in the conference room and you scribbled something in your case file - also something he noticed, you seemed to prefer paper as much as he did - you reached for your coffee cup with your right hand and continued to write undisturbed with your left, until the entire team looked at you as if you were from another star. It was a look Spencer knew all too well.

He had never met anyone like you.

Spencer liked you from the first moment he saw you. He liked that you took your backpack on both shoulders and that you preferred cocoa to coffee. He liked the way you smiled at him when he brought you one from the office kitchen and set it on your desk. And he liked the way your skin felt on his when you reached under the desk for his hand when you noticed a change in his demeanor. You then squeezed his hand twice. Once for "It's all right" and once for "I'm here, with you."

In your presence, everything seemed as easy as breathing. You listened to him when he blathered on about a subject you didn't understand, because you liked his intelligence and the way he explained things without looking down on others. You even asked when he had to explain something to you, which had surprised him so much the first few times that he had completely forgotten what your conversation was about. He had stared at you and the blush had come to his face. One feature that didn't escape you, but made him even more attractive to you.

When you went to his table one morning and told him that you had seen Star Trek for the first time the previous night, and now wondered how realistic the physics in the movie were, he could hardly stand it. You were beautiful and intelligent and interested in Star Trek? And when you asked him if he could explain something from the movie to you, he was sure his dream girl was standing right in front of him.

"I need your help", he told Derek that very day as they stood together in the kitchen. "How do I ask a girl out?"

Derek nearly choked on his coffee before turning to Spencer. "Since when do you want to date?" He noticed Spencer's gaze, which wasn't on him, but slid past him and lingered on you.You sat at your desk and tucked your hair behind your ears before looking up and over at Spencer's desk.  Derek could see your gaze wander around the office and then linger on Spencer before you smiled and got back to work. With a grin, Derek looked at Spencer. "You're going to ask Y/N out on a date? Oh boy, it's about time you finally do. I already said to Penelope that -"

"Please, Morgan. I just want to know how to ask her out”, Spencer interrupted him, looking at his friend.

Derek's grin gave way to an honest, friendly smile. "Don't make a big deal out of it. Just ask her directly."

"And if she says no?", asked Spencer uncertainly, his mouth twisting into a thin line. He couldn't imagine you going on a date with him, but he couldn't stay in the dark any longer either. He had to at least try.

"She won't”, Derek assured him. The whole team felt that Spencer and you would be perfect for each other, but he didn't tell him that. Spencer should learn to walk before he starts running. "I can see the way she looks at you. And if she does say no, she's not as smart as I thought."

Spencer trusted Derek's words and took it upon himself to ask you out on a date that very day. He had phrased the question countless times in his head, even encouraging himself in the mirror in the men's room, but every time he stood in front of you and looked at your beautiful face, he couldn't get a single word out. They got stuck in his throat and he was so embarrassed that he fled from you several times. By the third time, he had red marks on his neck, which you noticed immediately, and you wondered how you had made him so uncomfortable without having really done anything. When he said nothing again, you put your hand on his forearm.

"Are you okay, Spencer?", you asked, and he just nodded. It's now or never.

"Wouldyougooutwithme?" He almost mumbled, but you had understood him perfectly. "If you don't want to, that's fine, and we'll pretend I never asked. We'll just keep being friends and -"

"Spencer," you interrupted, smiling up at him, "I'd love to go out with you," you replied, and he was able to breathe deeply again. The marks on his neck faded as you tucked your hair behind your ear.

He had done it. Spencer had asked you and you had agreed, but where was he going to take you? Nothing seemed good enough for him. Going out to eat was nice, but you didn't seem like someone who needed to talk the whole time. He thought movie theaters were dumb because you couldn't talk there at all. After two days he had thought of something and he wouldn't have minded if you thought the idea was stupid, but when he presented his idea to you, you smiled at him excitedly.

"I can't wait."

You spent your first date in Spencer's favorite library, surrounded by knowledge and stories. You walked the aisles together, telling stories of books you had read and found to be good, and books you had abandoned because they were so bad you couldn't finish them. As you walked through each aisle, which had actually taken an entire afternoon, Spencer didn't want the date to end. He was going to suggest something else, but you beat him to it.

"There's a couch over there. Shall we sit there? Then you can read me something from your favorite book."

You would be the death of him.

A few weeks later, you had arranged to go for a walk. The weather was nice, not too hot and not too cool, so you strolled hand in hand along the paths. He liked the fact that you worked together but couldn't just talk about the job. You were explaining to him why a certain Matt Donavan from a vampire series was incredibly annoying when someone stopped in front of you.

"Y/N! How nice to see you!", the young woman said, unceremoniously wrapping her arms around you. When she broke away from you, you looked at Spencer.

"Spencer, this is Lisa, my college roommate. Lisa, this is Spencer, my boyfriend”, you explained before you could think about what you had just said. You chatted briefly before going your separate ways again. You noticed a change in Spencer's behavior and feared you had misinterpreted everything. When you couldn't take it anymore, you stopped.

"Look, I'm sorry I called you my boyfriend”, you said, looking down at the ground in shame. "We've never talked about what exactly we are, but it feels like you're my boyfriend and I wish you were, so I -"

"Y/N”, he interrupted you and tenderly reached for your hand. A smile spread across his face. He couldn't believe himself that he would ask you that. "Would you like to be my girlfriend?"

The bar was crowded and the later it got, the more crowded you felt. The team had been in the mood to celebrate after a difficult case, so everyone had gathered in the regular bar. Penelope was putting on some dance moves on the dance floor while Emily and JJ were bawling out the song, which neither Spencer nor you knew. He had his arm around your waist and pulled you tightly to his side, which you enjoyed very much. He didn't fit in here with his shirt and cardigan, but he fit you, you were one hundred percent sure of that.

As you stifled a yawn, he looked down at you. "Shall we go? You seem tired and I'm getting ready to go to bed too”, he suggested and you nodded. Outside, he hailed you a cab and as you got in, you gave the driver Spencer's address.

"We're going to my place?", asked Spencer, looking at you in confusion as you nestled into his side.

"Yeah, I hope that's okay”, you replied, "If it's too soon for you for us to sleep together, then you just have to say so. I won't be mad at you."

How could he be mad at you? You wanted to spend the night with him. You wanted to fall asleep next to him and wake up next to him. He had hit the jackpot.

"Would you like to drink something?", he asked as you sat down on the couch and kicked off your shoes. It wasn't the first time you'd been in his apartment, but you'd never entered his bedroom before and you didn't want to take the step without him. It was still his apartment and his privacy and you respected that.

"Just water, please”, you replied, pulling your legs up so he could sit next to you. He handed you the glass and you took a big gulp.

In your presence, Spencer had never felt like an oddball. You never made him feel like he was different or weird. You didn't laugh at him, you laughed with him, and you had assured him many times how incredibly attractive he was to you, even if he couldn't see it. He wasn't too skinny or too unathletic for you. He dressed askew, but it suited him like a glove and you had imagined more than once what he would look like without clothes. It didn't bother you in the least that he wasn't interested in the technology of today. For you, he was just right. For you, he was perfect.

Even though you often assured him how much you liked him and how happy you were with him, he was still insecure from time to time. But as you sat there together on the couch and you put your legs on his thighs, he was one hundred percent sure that he didn't need to be insecure. On your left foot was a green sock, while on your right dangled an orange sock.

You wore the socks like he did. Two different ones. Had you seen this on him and copied it or had you always worn socks like this? A question that could be answered later. His heart stopped for a second, his brain turned to mush, which is why he couldn't control his following words either. "I think I love you."

Surprised, you looked to him and noticed that his gaze lingered on your socks. "You see my socks and then say you love me? Maybe something isn't going right in that clever head of yours”, you grinned and leaned towards him. Blushes shot up his face. "I love you too, Spencer."

Gently, you placed your lips on his. The kiss was tender, hesitant, but Spencer saw his chance and gently pulled you onto his lap before wrapping his arms around you and holding you close. His heart threatened to overflow with love. As he placed his hands on your butt, you moaned softly into his mouth. He smiled.

In your presence, he didn't feel like he was different.

[btssaysstudy]

Salvage - 1 || jjk/kth.

Summary: After your confession, it's safe to say that there was nothing left to salvage between you and Jungkook. However, things start to change when a new hurdler joins the team. Genre: college!au, track!jungkook, track!taehyung, track!reader, angst & fluff Pairing: jungkook x reader, taehyung x reader Warning(s) : unrequited love, alcohol (drinking) mentioned, swearing Chapter Word Count: 3.7k a/n: My first mini series! Let me know what you guys think and the ending depends on your feedback :) taglist: do let me know if you want to be added to the series taglist

series masterlist

“Wake me up when you’re done.”

“Alright, alright. I’m done.” Your body got up from your seat, but your gaze still glued on your laptop screen and hands on your keyboard. Your roommate groaned, marching her way to pull your hands away from the laptop.

“Yn, it’s a Friday night. Let’s go! Namjoon’s waiting for us downstairs.”

“Yea but,” You sighed, your eyes on your work, “I still have quite a lot of things to do. Maybe I’ll skip this party—“

“Like how you missed Hoseok’s birthday party? I’m sure he’s going to hunt you down later. You still have the weekends to complete your work and you’re already dressed up.”

You knew your roommate was right. You had agreed to go for this party since it was one of Namjoon’s close friends’ birthday. Though you weren’t close to the birthday boy, you were close to Namjoon and his girlfriend, who also happened to be your roommate - Miya.

“Okay, okay.” You quickly saved your work and turned your laptop off. “Let’s go.”

Miya squealed in excitement, linking her arm around yours as she pulled you towards the door. The two of you went down to meet Namjoon who had been patiently waiting for you to get down.

“Sorry for wait.” You gave an apologetic smile. “No worries! We’re still early. Good to miss the first few awkward minutes of the party.” He chuckled as he opened the car door to let you both in.

Miya truly hit jackpot with Namjoon. He was the whole package - athletic, smart and a gentleman. Miya was a great catch herself and you were thankful that she was your roommate.

Miya had been your roommate since freshmen year and ever since, you both always wanted to dorm together. Miya was very caring and gentle yet blunt at the same time. You both were awkward beings when you first met, and you were worried how dorm life would be with a stranger.

Thankfully, Miya, being the straightforward person, immediately went out with setting the ground rules together and suggested for a roommate date to get to know each other.

The rest was practically history.

Miya had been there for many of your significant memories in college - the good and the bad.

She was also there when you met Jungkook.

“Do you have any clubs in mind?”

“Actually, I do. I’m planning to sign up for track.”

Miya gasped and giggled in excitement, “No way, I want to join track too!”

“That’s cool! Shall we head over then?”

The two of you made your way to the track and field booth, sharing about what events you partake in. Miya was a hurdler while you weren’t. Nonetheless, it was pretty amazing to you two that you were both signing up for the track team.

“Hey freshies! Here to sign up?”

The two of you converse with the seniors to learn more about the try-outs and practice sessions.

“Psst,” Miya nudged you as you filled up the sign-up form, “On your left. Isn’t he cute?”

Your gaze turned to see a tall, buff boy, who seemed to be signing up for track as well. “He’s pretty cute.”

“I’m going to say hi. Wait for me.” Miya winked at you before approaching the boy - little did she know at that time that he was going to be her boyfriend.

“See you try-outs!” You smiled at the senior as you handed the form.

Your eyes wandered around the nearby booths as you waited for Miya to come back.

“I’ll just look around.” You mouthed at her when she turned to make eye contact with you.

“Hey! Interested to join Photography club?”

“Freshies! Come join the Badminton club!”

The atmosphere was completely chaotic with seniors shouting at the top of their lungs to promote their club. Slightly disoriented from the ruckus, you had bumped into a stranger.

“I’m so sorry—“

“So sorry about that—“

The two of you took a step back to meet each other’s eyes. “Sorry about that.” The black-haired boy gave a sheepish grin as he rubbed the nape of his neck. “I was kinda too excited to sign up for a club.”

“No worries, it’s my fault as well. I wasn’t looking.”

“All’s good. B-But… Any chance that you happen to know where the track and field club booth is at?”

Your eyes widened slightly in amusement, “Yea I do. I was just about to head back to meet my friend.”

“Oh! Could I follow you there?”

“Sure.”

Your eyes took a quick once-over, it wasn’t hard to notice that his built was athletic, donned in sweats and an oversize black shirt, this guy looked like the poster boy of college dudes.

“My name’s Jungkook. What’s yours?”

“Yn. Did you run track before college?”

“Yep, I do 4x100s.”

“Oh, same here!” You flashed a smile. “Wow, what a coincidence that I’d bump into you huh.” Jungkook chuckled and you did the same. “Must be a sign that we’ll both be teammates.”

“Not a bad sign at all.”

“Yn!” Miya waved her hand wildly amidst the crowd. “I was about to leave the booth to go find you! What booths did you— Oh hi, I’m Miya, you are?”

“Jungkook. Nice to meet you. You must be the friend yn was going back for.”

Miya gave you a subtle look which you chose to ignore that day.

“Jungkook,” Miya grinned, “It’s nice to meet you too!”

“Speaking of the party, yn, you know Jungkook will be there as well, right?”

“Yes, this is the tenth time you’ve told me that.”

“Sorry, just another reminder before we pull up to the party.”

Besides having a ton of workload to do, you also had another reason for having second thoughts.

That reason was Jungkook.

“Thanks for your concern. But it’s been a year, I���m long over it.”

“That’s great to hear, I’m proud of you yn.” Namjoon piped in as he parked the car. “And we,” He placed his hand on Miya’s, “Should trust our friend’s word.”

Miya glanced at you before sighing, “Alright. I do. Now, let’s go greet the birthday boy.”

The three of you left the car and made your way to the party venue. The birthday boy was clearly loaded as the venue was huge. You jaw dropped in awe, “Why is this party so extravagant?”

“Good thing our birthday gifts are more drinks.” Miya nudged you and you laughed, nodding your head.

You were all greeted with blaring music from the stereo and neon lights to add into the ambience. People had already begun drinking and some were busy eating dinner.

“Yn!! I missed you!” A very familiar voice erupted as you spotted a figure rushing towards you.

“Hoseok!” You grinned, extending your arms out for a hug.

“You didn’t come to my party!” He pouted as he pulled away. “But I visited the next day as a surprise!” You defended yourself.

“That’s true… Still feels like forever since I saw you.” Hoseok pulled you back in for a hug.

The four of you made your way to one of open rooms which had been turned into a buffet area. You had helped yourself to the wide array of food and found a table to eat with your friends.

“We have a new hurdler joining us. He’s our batch but he only joined the club this try-out round.” Namjoon filled you in since you were the only non-hurdler in your group.

“Oh, who is it?”

“Kim Taehyung.”

“Wait, Kim Taehyung? Isn’t he from table tennis?”

Namjoon shrugged his shoulders, “Guess he wanted to try something new. I was there during try-outs and he’s a really fast runner.”

—

Since it was a huge party and you weren’t close to the birthday boy, you didn’t need to spend the night entertaining the main character of the night.

To make full use of the amenities at the booked venue, the four of you started playing different rounds of games.

You were paired with Hoseok against Miya and Namjoon. The first round was charades and you lost to them. Hoseok found the game Just Dance and proposed it as the next round.

Jungkook had not been on your mind the entire night as you busied yourself playing games with your friends.

“What else can you do?!” Miya exclaimed, stepping in front to take over Hoseok’s spot.

“More like what else can you not do?! That was amazing!” You pulled Hoseok in for hug, “We’re gonna win this. Get ready to treat us for a meal!”

Namjoon chuckled, “We have to do another game after this. Hoseok basically created the game Just Dance. He followed the moves to easily.”

“Don’t whine, just dance!” Hoseok teased, pulling you back on the couch as you both watched Miya and Namjoon do their round.

“Didn’t want to ruin the mood but… He’s watching.” Hoseok leaned in to whisper in your ear. Your eyes slowly wandered around the venue to spot a familiar figure hanging around a crowd of people.

You both made eye contact and you decided to cast a smile at his direction. In return, you received a quick and small smile before he looked away, completely avoiding your direction.

“That went well.”

“Give him time.”

“Hobi,” you deadpanned, “I’m pretty sure one year is a lot of time.”

Hoseok just shrugged, “I know but… Okay, I have nothing to say to defend him.”

You chuckled, turning your attention back to Miya and Namjoon, “You don’t have to defend him.”

“He’s my close friend too.”

“I know, and I feel bad that you have to split yourself in half every time—“

“No, no,” Hoseok nudged you to get that thought off your mind, “I don’t feel that way. Besides, I met the two of you on separate occasions as well. Please don’t feel guilty about anything.”

You gave him a thankful smile, “Thanks Hobi.”

The Just Dance bet ended with your landslide victory thanks to Hoseok’s hidden dance skills.

Namjoon insisted for another game to even the playing field and Hoseok went out to the backyard to set up the beer pong table. Miya and Namjoon had gone to the kitchen to grab the cups and drinks and you had volunteered to grab more titbits to snack on.

Thanks to your luck, Jungkook had busied himself with filling his plate with snacks as well.

“Hey.”

Jungkook jumped upon heading your voice, quickly steadying the plate on his hand. “H-Hey.”

“How’s the party going?”

You attempted to start a conversation with him as you grabbed a plate yourself. Jungkook awkwardly cleared his throat, “It’s a huge party… H-How about— Are you enjoying it?”

“Yea, there’s tons of things to do. How about you?”

“Yea.” Jungkook fiddled with one of the serving scoops. You pressed your lips in a tight smile, recognising the awkward atmosphere engulfing the both of you.

It hurt you to know Jungkook was still feeling awkward around you. It always reminded you that you had made the wrong choice. That you had ruined everything between the two of you.

“Right, I guess I’ll head off first. See you at practice?”

“Yea… See you around.” Jungkook nodded his head, his gaze locked on the table filled with snacks as you left the area, feeling dejected from your encounter.

“What’s with the long face?” Hoseok asked as you approached your group. You looked up to meet his eyes and he immediately knew, sighing as he pulled you into a comforting hug.

“It’s not your fault.”

“Still feels like it is.”

-

“Is it just me or am I still hungover from the party?”

You laughed, “You had a whole Sunday to rest.”

Miya sighed as she started doing hip circles. “I know, I must be getting old.”

“You probably are. Anyway, where is Namjoon?”

Just as you had asked, you heard his voice calling you and Miya. The both of you turned to see Namjoon heading over your direction with someone unfamiliar next to him. Namjoon was goofily waving his hands to grab your attention while pointing to the male next to him.

As they got closer, you managed to recognise the person next him. It was Kim Taehyung. He was popular in college because he was very talented at table tennis. It shocked you when Namjoon said he had joined the track team as a hurdler.

“You two must be Miya and Yn. I’m Taehyung.” He stuck out his hand for a handshake.

With a light smile, you reached out to return the handshake. Taehyung had a welcoming aura around him. He had a friendly and approachable vibe. He was tall, athletic, and good looking.

“So, what made you join track?”

He shrugged his shoulders, “It’s our last year in college, wanted to try something different.”

“Hope you like it here.”

Taehyung glanced back at you, casting a boxy grin your way, “I think I will.”

The coach blew their whistle to grab everyone’s attention. Everyone made their way to the centre of the field to start physical training. Training started with light warm-ups before rounds around the track.

While running, Taehyung was happily chatting away with you to get to know you better. “That sucks, so you’re not a hurdler?”

“Nope, I do 4x100s.”

“So, I’ll only get to see you once a week.” Taehyung pouted and you chuckled, “You can see me on other days.”

Track had 3 sessions a week - one combined with everyone and two within your own events. The combined session was physical training for all, hence why you were running rounds with a hurdler by your side.

“I’ll take that up!” He winked at you before speeding up slightly, “Catch me if you can!”

From behind, Jungkook watched you and Taehyung converse with a scowl on his face.

Why were you even talking while jogging? Was Taehyung flirting with you?

He used to be the one disturbing you during these rounds.

Jungkook tried to shrug off the scene of you and Taehyung together, ignoring the bitter feeling growing in his chest.

-

“Don’t feel bad. You’re sick, I’ll bring up some food for you.” You grabbed your student ID and phone as you insisted that Miya stayed in bed. Casting you a weak smile, she thanked you as you left your dorm to head off to the dining hall.

You lucked out when you saw Jungkook standing at the end of the queue, scrolling through his phone. With a deep breathe in as you made your way to join the queue. “Hey.” You gave a cautious greeting towards his way. Jungkook’s heart jumped, his grip tightening on his phone as he looked up to see you smiling at him.

“Hey.”

Jungkook hated how awkward he felt with you. It never used to be that way. Then again, that was a year ago.

You also never understood why Jungkook was the one avoiding you when you were the one who got rejected.

“Today was fun.” Jungkook gave you a toothy grin, “Yea it was.”

“Definitely my new favourite restaurant. I’m so full!” He playfully patted his stomach and you chuckled, “Looks like I know where to go when you start being grumpy or stressed.”

“That’s easy, you don’t have to take me to that restaurant. I just have to spend time with you and I’m good to go.” He shrugged his shoulders. Your heart fluttered at how nonchalant his words were yet so genuine. You had been thinking about it the entire afternoon, contemplating if it was the right decision. But you knew you had to let it out before it was too late.

“You good?” Jungkook pulled you out from your thoughts. “Mm? Oh yea, I’m good.” Your feet lazily kicked a stone in front of you.

“Hey,” Jungkook stopped walking, gently placing his hand on your arm to turn you around to face him. “You can always tell me something.”

“I know, I’m… I’m just tired that’s all.”

Jungkook pursed his lips together, “How about we head over to my place to watch a movie?”

“Sure.”

You let Jungkook choose the movie for the night as your head was far away. Jungkook nudged you, shimmying his shoulders. That was always his signal when he offered his shoulder for you to rest on. You gave him a small smile as you leaned your head on his shoulder.

Despite loving Marvel, you found yourself not paying a single ounce of attention to the movie. Jungkook seemed to have noticed that as you weren’t bantering with his small comments to the movie.

You were brought back to reality when you noticed the movie was paused.

“What’s wrong?” You asked, sitting up to face Jungkook.

“I was about to ask that.”

“I’m… I’m tired. I think I’ll just head home for the night.”

Jungkook frowned and you had to look away to save yourself from crumbling into pieces.

“Are you sure you don’t want to talk about what’s on your mind?”

You sighed, this was it. You just had to let it out.

“Promise me you won’t hate me?”

“Hate you? Jungkook repeated, “I would never hate you.”

He placed his hand on your knee, encouraging you to continue. “I’ve liked you for a while.” You paused, allowing the words to sink in. You could feel his hand stiffen and you were sure he could hear the loud beating of your heart.

The silence was deafening.

Your confession repeating in both your heads.

As every second dragged on, you started to regret it even more. You had made a terrible mistake and there was no way you could take it back. Life had no re-dos.

“I’m guessing you don’t feel the same way, given the response.” You clicked your tongue together, gathering the courage to look up at him.

Jungkook was lost for words. He would have never expected to hear a confession from you that night. From his closest friend. From his best friend.

Your words left a funny feeling in him that night, but he could not tell whether it was a good or bad feeling.

“Well, don’t worry.” You forced a laugh, “I didn’t expect much anyway. I just wanted to let it out. But I’m guessing I just ruined our friendship.”

“N-No, uh… I just… I just need time to… to absorb all of this.”

You nodded your head, “I understand.” You took it as a cue to get up from the couch, Jungkook’s eyes following your figure. “I’ll see myself out. Sorry for ruining the night.”

“T-Text me when you made it home safely.” Jungkook called out as you headed for the door.

Terrible. Even after ruining your friendship, Jungkook was still looking out for you. You hated how that made you feel. You turned around to face him one more time, a smile plastered on your face.

“Will do. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.”

It pained Jungkook to see you holding back your tears. If he could have another chance to replay that night. He would’ve stopped you from leaving, he would’ve told you that your friendship wasn’t ruined.

He would’ve done anything he could that night to stop you from leaving his life.

But in reality, he did none of those.

When you texted him that night that you were home, your message was left unread.

You took it as a message to give him time to process everything. A night turned into a day. A day turned into a week. A week turned into a month. A month turned into a year.

It was because of your confession, you both had become strangers once again.

“Yn!”

“Oh, hi Tae!”

Despite using his phone, Jungkook’s attention was on your conversation with Taehyung. You were already calling him ‘Tae’? Since when were you that close with him?

“Namjoon told me Miya’s sick. She alright?”

“Yep, just grabbing food for her so she can take her meds and rest.”

“Need my help?”

“Oh no, all’s good.”

Taehyung nudged you, “It’s alright, you have to get your own food too. I’ve already eaten, I can help carry her food up to your dorm, check up on her as well.”

“Sure, if you’re free, that is.”

“Free for you.” He teased and you laughed, looking away momentarily to see Jungkook who seemed to be invested in his phone.

“Oh, Jungkook! Didn’t recognise you at first. How’ve you been?”

Jungkook looked up to greet Taehyung, “H-Hey, I’ve been well.”

Ever since meeting Taehyung, he got along with your group easily. In fact, he got along with everyone effortlessly. He knew almost everyone in the track team only after 2 weeks. That meant only 2 combined sessions. Somehow along the way, it seemed that he had introduced himself to Jungkook as well.

Taehyung was amazing with people and that was admirable. The more you got to know Taehyung, the more you looked forward to hanging out with him.

“See you next practice!” Taehyung happily patted Jungkook’s shoulders goodbye as you two went off a different direction towards your dorm.

You barely register their conversation as your head was somewhere else, recalling the night you had confessed.

“Hey, are you okay?” Taehyung’s concerned voice made you look up to meet his eyes.

“I’m okay.”

Taehyung frowned, glancing behind to see Jungkook looking at the two of you walking away. Jungkook shook his head, quickly glancing away as Taehyung caught him looking.

“Something to do with Jungkook, perhaps?”

Taehyung was very observant and you knew you couldn’t fool him as well.

“Sort of… We just used to be close but... He’s been avoiding me and I’ve been trying to salvage whatever’s left. But it doesn’t seem to be working.”

Taehyung pursed his lips together, “It’s not fair if only one party is putting in the effort, you know.”

“I know, it’s just that… We used to be close.” You sighed as you stepped into the elevator with him, your gaze on your tray of food.

“Still, it’s not worth salvaging if you’re the only one putting in the effort. I’m sure you’ve done your best. Sometimes, you just can’t force things to happen.”

As the elevator opened to your level, you allowed his words to sink in.

“Miya! We come with food!” Taehyung grinned, bringing the tray to your sick roommate as she thanked the two of you for your help.

Your eyes trailed to Taehyung who was helping Miya grab her medicine and a glass of water.

Maybe Taehyung was right. Maybe it’s time to stop trying.

[achillieus]

let you down. (sebastian stan x reader)

summary: it's a universal truth but it's worth repeating; feelings eat us raw. or just an actor and a girl falling in and out of love over the course of three months.

(this was inspired by sebastian's visit to greece for his movie, monday, and is based on that, so that means in the story we’re in 2018. also i have this posted on ao3 too but while i’m writing the last parts i thought of posting it here too)

pairing: sebastian stan x reader

warnings: alcohol, sexual references, implied depression, don’t kill me because of the ending, sebastian and reader are the definition of right person wrong time, it's kinda slowburn because i love the yearning, also this part has some funny moments but overall it’s a big SOB

part: 6/6 (there will also be an epilogue)

(other parts)   (masterlist)

This is how it ends: broken hearts from crashed dreams.

Sebastian holds you until his muscles ache and your lungs burn from the feeling of too little oxygen. It is cold and dark, almost midnight, too dark, a starless night.

No more stars for you and I.

“Here,” Voice hoarse, eyes heavy-lid and itching from almost crying. He gives you one of the rings he wore in the movie. “I want you to keep this.”

Keep it close to your heart. Forget me not.

He takes a breath and a step back, tries to regain all the strength he still has, steady feet and shoulders fixed. He digs his nails into his palms, red marks in his skin, air catching in his throat, he’s on the verge of falling but he stays standing.

He remembers tears glistening down his cheeks, maybe they were yours not his, and the cold autumn wind hitting his face and he remembers feeling like he’s dying.

And then he closes the door of Argyris’ car and looks at you.

And his heart stretches and stretches and stretches and then somehow splits in half.

/

It goes like this:

There’s a ghost that lives in your apartment from now on. In the living room. Sitting on the couch. And it has steel blue eyes and a familiar heart. And it whispers a love story, half-finished, and you cannot make it stop.

The ghost touches your collarbone and he’s gone but there’s a ring in a golden chain around your neck and a white shirt forgotten in your laundry. And it smells like him. The clinging scent of his aftershave sticking to your pores. Eucalyptus. And no matter how hard you try to wash it off, it still lingers.

How could I ever forget someone like you?

The ghost lives here, but the place is empty, so empty. And it’s hard not to cry.

/

Sebastian calls and texts a lot.

He tells you he’s tired but excited because he started filming a new movie. It’s very indie and experimental, I can’t wait for you to see it. He tells you he’s missing his days in Greece like hell and that one night he dreamt of you. Didn’t want to wake up. What he doesn’t tell you is that he’s coming back in a month, Argyris needs him for some extra scenes. It’s nearly killing him but he doesn’t tell you. He wants to surprise you, see the pure light in your eyes when they’ll meet his.

/

You try sexting. It doesn’t go very well.

23:50, sebastian: if you were here in my bed right now what would you be doing

06:51, you: probably falling asleep hahaha

06:51, you: oh fuck was i supposed to sext back

06:51, you: sorry seb i just woke up and i have a class in an hour, love you <3

23:52, sebastian: fuck timezones

/

(three weeks and 10 seconds later)

“I can’t believe she doesn’t know you’re here,” Argyris shakes his head as he’s driving home from the airport, “If I were her, I’d kill you.”

“Good thing I didn’t fall in love with you.”

Sebastian laughs and looks out of the car window. The stars. There are so many stars tonight. He holds his breath; he’s finally feeling whole again. His heart isn’t split in two anymore.

/

You don’t know how long you stand there at your door, staring at him, but it feels like a century before he grins, almost laughs, takes your hands in his and you start considering that perhaps this isn’t a hallucination. Perhaps it’s real.

“Surprise?”

Something inside of you bursts, your organs twitch. You can’t think, you can’t speak, but you can move. You don’t lose any more time, you take a step forward, attach your bodies, your face buried in his neck, your fingers clutching into the rough fabric of his jacket. You breathe him in like an antidote.

“How?”

“Does it matter?”

“No.”

You kiss him and it’s like poetry, like art, like honey and you can’t separate yourself from him, not even hours later.

/

(looking back, these were the golden days)

You pretending to be mad at him for not telling you he was coming back and him pressing his lips on your skin, drawing patterns on your naked shoulder. A feathery touch.

Sebastian always touches you like you’re something made of gold and porcelain, something cherished that constantly needs to be treasured. And nobody has done that before. And you love him for it.

You try to decorate your Christmas tree together. He messes with the lights for a while, eventually gives up and goes on to eat too many reindeer shaped cookies.

He massages your muscles when you write a boring essay for college.

You go with him when he has to shoot a “driving a motorcycle naked in the centre of Athens” scene and you bite the inside of your cheeks to stop smiling like an idiot.

He gives you a dress he bought for you in New York.  

“You didn’t have to.”

“I know, but I wanted to.”

He calls you sweetheart in the mornings, still half asleep and later joins you in the shower.

“Why are you so hot?”

“Climate change”

“Oh, shut up”

It’s tender and it’s soft and it’s human.

And that’s the saddest part.

/

Soon you realize that him leaving two months ago was merely a rehearsal and you still haven’t said your actual goodbyes. Your chest starts to feel as if it’s full of crushed glass.

And it’s ridiculous because you fell in love with Sebastian sometime between the first ten days you spent together.

Who falls in love in ten days?  

Ridiculous or not, you know you are in love with him just as you know that sooner or later, whatever he is feeling will fade and wither. Maybe it’ll be in a week, maybe it’ll be in a month, maybe in a year if you’re lucky. But there will definitely come a day when he will step out of a gala or a party or a fancy gym in New York with a beautiful model in his arms and two paparazzi’s following him around.

What will you be then?

A past small cameo in his life. A side character. Will he remember your name?

He is your whole world.

(a bottle of cheap prosecco helps you decide that)

He is your whole world.

And yet, there will come a day when he won’t even remember your name.

/

It was difficult. No, it was the most difficult thing you’ve ever done. Telling him how you think it’d be better if you didn’t talk after he leaves.

“I don’t agree with this.”

“Seb, it’s for the best.”

Your body doesn’t feel strong enough to carry your heart. And you’re certain it will only get worse once he’s away. The world around you will melt. You’ll obsess over a phone screen and his messages. You’ll start chasing ghosts again. You can’t handle that.

“Why?” He says urgently and his fingers dance over the flesh of your palms.

“Because this”, you motion your hand between the two of you, “is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever had in my life and I don’t want it to become ugly.”

He nods, he understands.

“I love you, you know,” he says smiling and tugs you closer to him, “And I may not be here to show you but I think I’ll love you for a long time.”

Your hand grips his waist right to the bones and something flares in your eyes, something wild that wrenches you around.

“I know, I’ll love you the same.”

“Maybe we’ll meet again.”

“Only if I’m the luckiest girl on the planet.”

He laughs and you look at him, fully aware he’ll be ripped out of your life like a page from a cheap leather notebook. And when you kiss for the last time, there’s a hole forming in your soul.

And just because endings don’t leave visible scars to one’s body and soul, that doesn’t mean the scars don’t exist. You know they do, because you feel the aching pain of every single one of them.

/

(every night when you close your eyes you see him)

(every night you look at the stars and think of him)

/

A month passes and Argyris asks you if you miss him.

“I don’t think I’ll ever stop.”

“He said the exact same thing.”

You tell him not to mention Sebastian again.

Two months pass and you need to stop stalking his instagram profile.

Three months pass and you almost text him.

Four months pass and you go to watch Endgame with some friends and you cry. You cry when Black Widow sacrifices herself and when Iron Man smiles at his wife while dying, and when Bucky Barnes appears on screen.

The others don’t understand and you don’t blame them.

Five months pass and Argyris’ girlfriend wants you to meet someone. A charming boy your age with blonde hair and a lip piercing.

And he's cute but you compare him to Sebastian even before he has the chance to say his name. His eyes are not the right shade of blue and he doesn’t look at you like you’re made of the world’s finest jewel.

And he doesn’t know any constellation names.

And then more than a year passes in a second and you learn to not look for him. Not anymore.

/

It’s early March 2020 and despite the rising fear of the upcoming pandemic, you’re doing well. Scars are starting to fade. And after spending two weeks in Prague, your best friend being there with an exchange program, Sebastian Stan is the farthest thing from your mind.

Until he literally comes crashing into you. At the airport.

No, it can’t be him.

You have your suitcase on one hand and a bottle of antiseptic gel on the other. He has two bodyguards on his sides and a black hoodie on.  And while half of his face is hidden behind a mask, you can see his eyes perfectly. A frozen lake in December. You would know those eyes in your deathbed, at the end of the world.

Your vision gets blurry and suddenly you feel cold.

He won’t recognize me, he can’t.

But then he looks at you and every memory you had buried inside of you resurfaces.

He motions to his guards to wait for him and he starts walking towards you. You breathe slowly, one breath at a time. He takes his mask off and you hesitate to take yours, not sure if you truly want him to see you.

You exchange the typical and very awkward hi, how are you, i’m glad you’re doing okay and then he smiles and it feels comfortable. Familiar.

It’s the whiff of another time that you always kept around. A reminder that you were once loved by a god.

“What are you doing here?”

“Filming Falcon and the Winter Soldier”

If you hadn’t unfollowed him on instagram, you’d known.

“Ah yes I heard about that, congrats.”

He nods a thank you.

“And you? In Prague?”

“I was at a friend.”

He looks conflicted, hurt, turns his gaze to his shoes on the grey cement. You want to say something, but you feel like throwing up.

And then he laughs.

“I was right.”

You’re confused, he notices.

“Back in Greece,” he swallows, “I told you this would happen.”

“It would have been an airport, different gates for each of us, but same waiting hall. Or a Greek island, where we’d both be for the summer.”

“I would have found you.”

You remember and you cannot help but smile. He was right. He found you.

“I didn’t believe you then.”

I barely believe you now.

He touches your hair. And his touch is like a knife. And you want to cry. Magnolias under your tongue. A love long lost is whispering in your ears until it hurts to listen. He’s like a magnetic field and you feel yourself drowning in him.

“I bet they’ll ask me a hundred questions about you later.” He says and looks at the two men waiting for him.

“And what will you tell them?”

“That you’re most probably the love of my life.”

Don’t cry, don’t cry.

“There’s no way we’d meet here if you’re not.”

“Sebastian,” His name sounds like a prayer coming out of your lips and you're ready to tell him you love him and you can swear he looks like he’s ready to faint, “I-”

The guards yell his name. And it's the same feeling people have just before a car crash.

“I’m sorry, I have to go.”

One last look.

Don’t cry, don’t cry.

You repeat it over and over again. But you fail.

“No, don't cry” He smiles, one last smile, “Just look at the stars and wait for us to meet again, because we will.”

He caresses the back of your palm for a second and you think your ribcage is shattering but it’s only your heart drumming frantically. Pushing your fragile bones to break. 

You want to stop him, wrap your arms around his torso, never let him go. Not again. But you don’t.

You just watch him leave, one more time, your knees weak, your head heavy and dizzy. For the split of a moment he turns and glances at you but then he’s nowhere to be seen.

Perhaps it was all in your imagination. Perhaps it was nothing but a wonder.

You get into your plane and you silently sob.

/

And then it’s summer.

And you overhear he was seen with a girl, the day before your vacation starts and you find a picture of them together a week later, a pretty blonde girl clinging to his side with a colorful bikini somewhere in Spain. And he’s smiling. And you feel so ashamed. And so stupid.

They say time heals all wounds but they must be wrong because you can’t forget how he used to smile at you or how he used to call you the love of his life.

Was he joking when he said you'll meet again? You bet if you asked him now, he wouldn't even remember saying it.

I’ll love you for a long time.

So long for nothing.

/

i really appreciate feedback, it motivates me tons and also tell me if you’d like to be tagged :) also i’m really sorry if you asked me to tag you and i didn’t  but i lost a lot of asks and the urls of the people that sent them :( 

tagging: @lharrietg @awkward117 @dannaloureen @broccoligf @cutestfangirlvevo @caitdaniels @arymb @buckybarnesishot310 @roguesthetic @itsaliceheree @sara-1705 @dorothea-hwldr @freshfreakoaftrash @drinkfantasy @christinamcdonnell ​@partypoison00 ​ @90ssantiago

[sundaysundaes]

Before Our Story Began

Lee Donghyuck/Haechan X Reader | Smut, Fluff | 7.4k | College AU Summary: The popular new kid at your campus has this habit of raising his eyebrows when he flirts and you just realized that maybe you have a kink for it.

It has the same setting as my previous Mark Lee X Reader’s stories (Our First Time and Drunk Antics) but if you’re not into Mark (I’m not judging but what is wrong with you) you can just skip those two because this story can be read separately. 

Before dating the socially-awkward, yet utterly adorable Mark Lee, you have had your fair share of relationships that are now reduced into the form of awkward friendships. Your last boyfriend was Lee Donghyuck—who also publicly known as Haechan—and that fact does not sit well with Mark, because well, they were the best of friends. They still are, but it feels like they’re walking on thin ice whenever you’re in the picture so you try your best to stay away from your ex just to make sure everything is all right with the three of you.

Which is quite weird, knowing how close you were with Haechan before.

It was weird in the beginning, but fate really did play a major role in your relationship. You were in your second year of college and you’d managed to pull yourself together by that time, though you hadn’t really made any real friends yet. You weren’t aware of Mark’s existence either at that point, though he probably had with him being your long-time secret admirer after all. You were too busy trying to adapt to the new college and dormitory life, as well as trying to keep your grades up, that you could barely spend some time socializing with people. Project partners and study buddies were really as far as you could go with the term of friendship during your first year.

Your relationship didn’t exactly start as friends with Lee Donghyuck. Even though he had made tons of friends since his orientation days in college, you were certainly not one of them. You didn’t even know he existed in your world, and neither did he. Younger than both you and Mark, Haechan shone like the sun almost in every aspect of his life and unlike you, people had surely noticed that because he was academically smart, physically good-looking, very social and adventurously funny. It didn’t take long before he became popular at your campus. So popular, in fact, that you heard chatters of his name when you walked down the campus’ hallway with your textbooks in your arms. You had only known his name but not his face, so you didn’t really feel nervous or overly excited like any other girls would’ve probably had when you accidentally sat next to him during public speaking class and saw that he had a silly note stuck on his back, pressed against his black hoodie.

“Hey,” you called, loud enough for him to hear but quiet enough so the people around you wouldn’t notice. “You’ve got something on your back.”

The boy was young, and he had the smoothest golden skin you’d ever seen on a boy. You would probably kill to have his perfect sun-kissed skin. He had slightly chubby cheeks and a mop of dark brown hair with bangs falling over his eyes. He was slouching forward in his seat with his arms draped over his table, staring lifelessly at the board. His lower lip was jutting out in boredom and slight annoyance, reminding you of a five-year-old boy missing his favorite cartoon. He threw a glance to the side, looking at you with big, chocolate brown eyes, and his eyebrows raised in question.

“What?” He asked and you pointed to the back of his hoodie with your pen.

“I won’t judge if it’s the kind of thing you’re into,” you said, “but I don’t think placing a note behind your back with the words Spank Me, Mama, written on it is the best way to actually, you know, get it.”

He blushed and he blushed so hard that it made you think huh, he’s kinda cute, but you buried the thought right away. You had promised yourself to focus better that year. Falling head over heels for a fellow student on the first day of your new term was not the right way to do it.

“Right, thanks.” He struggled with the note, reaching behind his back as if his skin was on fire. You were about to help when he finally snatched the paper and read the words under his breath, eyes widening in shock.

“I assume that’s not your handwriting?” You were amused but tried your best not to tease him so much.

He did this pout that actually kind of fit his face, probably because he still had that baby face going on. Most of the guys you knew would look immensely disgusting if they pulled that kind of pout. Take your brother, Johnny, for example. Even the thought of him doing that already made you feel like punching your fist against a wall.

“I would weep myself to sleep if my handwriting was this bad,” he grumbled and you smiled secretly to yourself. He turned to you, an awkward grin painting his face. “Sorry, my friends are assholes. Do you happen to know a swamp nearby where I can dump dead bodies without being found out?”

You nod. “I know a place but it’s no longer free, though. They charge you, like, ten thousand won per body. Which is why I’m broke.”

His timid grin grew into a bright smile, probably feeling quite elated that somebody shared the same type of dumb humor as him. “I’m Lee Donghyuck.” He sneaked a hand under a table and you took it for a handshake, answering him with your name. “Thanks for saving my life.”

“Most welcome. You can save me back later when I have the words spank me, daddy, glued to my back.”

“So your friends are assholes too?”

“It’s what people have in common these days, I suppose.”

But when your professor spoke louder to make sure he didn’t any other noise in the room except his own, you had to cut your conversation short and only threw small grins at him every now and then.

When the class ended, you both parted ways with nothing more than a small wave of a hand and a casual, “Well, I guess, I’ll see you later.” You thought it would be too weird to get even friendlier than that, and he probably did too. You admitted that he was cute, but not cute enough for you to ditch your next class and make out with him in the nearest parking lot. You thought you were going to see him again soon anyway, probably the next week when the same class started.

And you were right, but you wished you weren’t because Donghyuck came back to your class the following week looking like a full-course meal.

Donghyuck probably had his hair cut short somewhere on the weekend and it looked absolutely fucking perfect on his head. His bangs were no longer hiding his eyes, and it was clear to you then that Donghyuck with his forehead seen, combined with those thick beautiful eyebrows and mesmerizing round eyes, were really something to behold.

He didn’t notice you were already in the class when he walked in, with his bag slinging on one shoulder. Some rowdy boys were shouting at the back of the room, “Haechan-ah, over here! Saved you a seat!” And Donghyuck grinned at them, waving his hand before he walked toward their seats and you thought Lee Donghyuck is Haechan?! That Haechan?! And mentally slapped yourself on the face when the flashback hit you. You had the chance to talk to one of the most popular boys in school and you talked about swamp and dead bodies.

Absolutely fucking perfect.

After you managed to collect yourself, you couldn’t hold back this urge to sneak a few glances to the back of the class, trying to catch a glimpse of that beautiful forehead of his—which you realized by then that you had some kind of a kink for it—without having him notice you.

But he did. He did notice every time you tried to secretly stare and he reciprocated each time with a smile, raising one of his eyebrows almost dangerously seductive at you and you thought goddamn if that wasn’t the sexiest thing I’ve seen in my twenty years of living I don’t know what is.

You offered your best effort to stay fucking calm despite everything that had been going on in your head, waving one hand at him with a small—hopefully not creepy—smile on your face. You immediately turned around right after, swallowing your breath, and tried not to vomit because your stomach felt like it was about to lurch out of your mouth. It wasn’t really an unpleasant feeling; it was just kind of new to you and you loathed the way your heart was slamming against your ribcages.

Okay, you mentally calmed yourself, get a hold of yourself. No need to panic. He’s just another cute boy, with a cute haircut, and a cute smirk, and a cute forehead and—

You really didn’t like where it was going.

When the class ended—and you didn’t learn a thing about it—you shoved your iPad back into your bag and let out the loudest sigh you had ever made in your sorry life.

“Bad day?”

Haechan’s voice was next to your ear and though you only jerked slightly on the outside, most of your soul had actually gone to heaven—or hell, from all those dirty thoughts you had about him during the last two hours of that lecture.

“Yeah,” you cooly replied. Thank God, your voice didn’t betray you. “My swamp is full again. I have to start looking for a new place.”

AM I SERIOUSLY TALKING ABOUT ANOTHER FUCKING SWAMP—

But Haechan was laughing about it, not too much but the amusement on his face was genuine. “It’s cute that you remember our previous conversation.”

“It’s cute that you do too.”

“Well, actually, that’s what I’ve been thinking about for the last week,” he told you with a smirk on his face. You dared to bet on your life that he was flirting with you and you were about to scream out of joy but you reminded yourself to play it cool.

“I don’t think it’s a conversation worth remembering,” you commented nonchalantly.

“Not if I had it with anyone else.”

You almost fell from your seat. “On second thought, it was a pretty interesting conversation, what with the—”

“Noona.” He suddenly leaned close, laying one hand on your desk to prop his weight. There was that smirk again—the one with his eyebrow raised. “I’m trying to flirt with you and ask you out on a date, if you haven’t noticed.”

Your tongue felt heavy in your mouth and you could hear your own heartbeat in your ears at that point. You had thought about it—about him asking you out—but your imagination did not do justice on how smooth and confident or how goddamn attractive he looked in real life. “Oh.”

“Oh.” He imitated, smirking a bit wider and you were dazed with how bright he shone. “So, can I take you out for lunch? Not anywhere close to swamps full of dead bodies, I swear.” Then after a small pause, he added, “Unless, that’s what you’re into.”

“Shut up,” you retorted, standing up and gathering all your belongings into your arms. “You’re paying.”

He laughed softly to himself, trailing after you with a cheeky grin on his face. “This swamp thing could be our thing, though.”

“Shut up.”

***

Haechan was not one to take it slow, you remember, which is way different from how Mark does things with you.

It wasn’t like Haechan was overly aggressive—as far as boys go, he was pretty normal about the whole dating and sex thing—but he really just head straight to the point whenever he had something in mind, whether it was by a sudden change of topic in your conversation, or acting it out directly with his body.

While Mark tends to plan things, Haechan just did everything out on a whim. You could be talking about science fiction movies at a cafe at one point, and ended up with having your clothes soaked with water by the next few hours because he suddenly felt like the day was too hot and jumping into the campus pool fully clothed was a good idea. You weren’t sure why you’d said yes to all of that when you just barely knew him but Haechan could be very persuasive. So dangerously so, that you would probably say yes to anything.

It was on your third date when he suddenly bent his head down and cut you in the middle of your sentence with a kiss. It was only a small peck, a quick pressing of his plump lips against yours, but it still managed to literally stop you from breathing for a good couple of seconds.

“Sorry,” he said, pulling away with his eyes still staring at your lips. “I was… distracted.”

You knew it was lust in his eyes and you were familiar with yourself enough to know that you usually preferred to have your first kiss after you knew the guy for a certain amount of time. But Haechan—the way he sometimes stared at your lips for a millisecond while you were talking, or hugged you for a few seconds too long before you parted ways—really made you feel special. Made you feel… wanted. And it had been a long time since someone made you feel that way.

So it really didn’t come too much of a surprise that when he dipped his head down to kiss you again, you responded with as much passion as he emitted. You didn’t care that both of you were still standing in the middle of your co-ed dorm’s hallway, though it was empty from how late it was. You had your fingers tangled in his hair as you tiptoed and leaned your entire weight to his body, making him inhale sharply and curl his fingers around the fabric of your dress.

“Again,” he breathed when you pulled away for a split second and immediately brought you back to him again. Haechan had one arm around your waist and another one holding your face, angling your head to the side so he could kiss you deeper.

Haechan was a good kisser—so frighteningly so that it made you feel conscious of how inexperienced you were compared to him. And with the way his hands were moving around your body, you could tell that things were going a bit too fast.

“Haechan—”

The hand that you laid on his chest to give you both some space, was brought over your head as he pressed your body against the door of your room. He kissed you harder, almost knocking your head against the wooden surface, and you could taste the flavor of the lollipop he had on his way back to your dorm. His scent was intoxicating in the best way possible, numbing your mind from thinking how this could probably end up in a bad decision.

“Haechan-ah, wait,” you gasped against his mouth, and when he did, pulling away from you for a few inches to catch his own breath, you noticed that even if you managed to stop him, you probably wouldn’t sound very convincing.

It was really fortunate that although Haechan was a man of passion, he still had the patience to make your consent his priority. “Too fast?” He asked, warm breath fanning against your lips and you really wanted to just close those few inches between you and be smothered with his kisses again.

So you did, and you could feel him smirking into the kiss. The way he slipped his tongue between your mouth made your knees buckle underneath your weight so you clutched onto him as if you were hanging to dear life. Haechan formed this low grunt at the back of his throat that made your skin tingle in delight, knowing that you had that kind of effect on him.

But really, something still didn’t feel right.

“Do you want to stop?” He asked, noticing how you fidgeted uncomfortably under his touch. He looked like stopping at this point would be the last thing he wanted to do but he still gave you the space you needed.

You nodded your head slowly at his question. Haechan looked like he had to put his best effort to gain control of his body and move away from you, and you could totally relate at that point, actually. You weren’t really sure why did you even stop him before. It just felt like the right thing to do but at the same time, it was the last thing you wanted to do.

“Haechannie—"

“I’m sorry,” he said, taking a step away from you and releasing you from his hold. You were surprised by the fact that you almost fell down to the floor when he wasn’t holding you.

“No, don’t be—it was, umm,” You cleared your throat. The collar of your knitted sweater suddenly felt too tight. “It was good.”

“Good?” Haechan asked, smirking as he raised an eyebrow and you thought fuck there’s that look again and you cursed inwardly a few more times for feeling so whipped for his little, seductive eyebrow raise. “I thought that was more than good, Noona.”

“Probably for you,” you wanted to tease but you could hear your voice crack at the end.

“Oh, really?”

And he kissed you again because he never wanted to lose his game. He knew he already had you wrapped under his fingers; he just wanted to make you succumb to him. To have you say how amazing his touches really felt on your skin because he was just that kind of a guy.

And he was winning. Your reaction was exactly the way he wanted you to be, arching your back under his touch, pressing your chest against his, tongue darting out to taste the inside of his mouth better and longer.

“No, wait, timeout.” You pushed him away again and you noticed that his hair was a mess from the work of your fingers and weirdly enough, it only made him ten thousand times hotter.

“Noona, you’re torturing me.” He whined against your shoulder, playfully biting the skin over your clothes. “Do you want me to stop or not?”

Haechan had the habit of whining when things didn’t go his way. It was immature and it would probably look childishly annoying on someone else, but it only made him  that much more adorable. Still annoying most of the time, but always adorable.

“I’m sorry.” You were torn between feeling bad or laughing about it because my God, look at that pout. “Maybe a five-minute break? I could make you some coffee. My roommate is away for the weekend.”

He sighed, the pout on his lips grew even more apparent. “You’re inviting me to your room? At this hour? After this?”

“I’m not going to have sex with you tonight, Lee Donghyuck, just to be clear.”

“Which is the more reason why you shouldn’t be inviting me over then!”

You laughed because his voice was becoming quite high-pitched. “Are you so incapable of using your brain instead of your dick?”

“Noonaaaaa~” He threw his head back in exasperation, which gave you the chance to ogle at the column of his throat. “Seriously, is torturing guys at the end of a date your sick hobby or something?”

“Look, if you stay over, we can still make-out.” You throw a smirk at him, unlocked your door and pushed it wide open. “And I make the most amazing coffee, trust me.”

“Fine,” he exhaled, walking into your room with a suppressed smile on his face. “And I’m only here for coffee, nothing more. Making-out with you is just a bonus.” And you found yourself giggling like a child as he cradled you into his arms and pushed you down to your bed because you both knew, it was the other way around.

***

About a month later, a similar situation happened again and there was no getting out of it.

It started with Haechan coming over to your room on a Sunday afternoon. Your roommate was staying over at her boyfriend’s place again for the weekend, so you had the room to yourself for the entire day. Haechan came unplanned and he’d brought his MacBook with him because, “I know myself well enough that I’d end up playing Overwatch instead of working on my assignment, so could you please be a responsible adult and force me to do my work even if I start crying at your feet?”

Haechan was always the dramatic one in your relationship but you nodded your head and let him in. You brought over some snacks and made him coffee like usual—which he always replied with, “Noona, I don’t want to sound like an ungrateful boyfriend but this coffee tastes like shi—” but was always finished with a pillow smacked to his face, a form of your courtesy.

You were working on your own papers too, sitting on the carpeted floor with your back pressed against the foot of your bed and a MacBook resting on your lap. Your textbooks were sprawled all over the place, and Haechan was lying down on your bed, head falling over the edge. He was looking at his phone, his thumb running up and down the screen.

“Noona?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m bored.”

“Aren’t you supposed to work on your assignment?”

“Finished it already.”

You threw a look over your shoulder, glancing to see him lounging on your bed as if it was his own. Haechan already had his MacBook closed, and was looking at you upside down with a completely bored look on his face. You knew he was smart, but you didn’t know he was that smart when he really put his mind to it.

“Well, that was fast,” you commented.

“No, you’re just doing it painfully slow.”

“Well, sorry for not being as smart as you,” you mumbled, even though you weren’t really annoyed about it. Haechan  huffed and walked closer, sitting closely right behind you, and trapping you between his legs.

“You’re the smartest girl I’ve ever met, though,” he said, wrapping his arms around your waist. “What are you working on exactly?”

“I don’t even know, honestly,” you sighed, leaning against his chest, dropping your head on his shoulder. “You wanna order some take-out?”

“Can I eat you for dinner instead?”

“Was that a sex joke, Lee Donghyuck?”

“Could be, if you’re interested.” You could see him wiggling his eyebrows from his reflection on your standing mirror. Both of you looked adorable, if you could say so yourself, wearing a matching white shirt (though not on purpose) and enjoying each other’s warmth with Haechan’s arms wrapped protectively around your figure. You sighed as you admired the sight of Haechan’s features in the mirror.

“Have I told you how sexy you look with your hair pushed back like this?” You asked, reaching out to touch some of his strands and he followed your gaze, looking at his own reflection in the mirror.

“Huh.” He seemed surprised. “It’s the first time you said that actually. What else do you think is sexy about me?”

“Promise you won’t get cocky about it if I tell you?”

“Can’t. You know how I am.”

You sighed but you succumbed to his wish. He praised you from time to time, it was only fair for you to do the same. “The way you dance.”

“You saw me dance?”

“Hm-hmm.”

“When?”

“That time when we went to Jaemin’s party. You were dancing to Billy Jean.”

“You saw that?!” He was flustered, scarlet painting his cheeks and ears. “That was—I thought you were in the bathroom!”

“Well, I was going to but then I saw you and kinda had to stop and stare for a little. You dance more with your hips than with your hands, do you know that? It was kinda hot.”

And just like that, the flabbergasted look on his face was immediately replaced with that Godforsaken cocky smirk again. “Were you turned on back then because of me?”

“A little. Or maybe I just really had to pee.”

“You should’ve said something, you know.”

“And then what? Have sex with you in Jaemin’s room? No freaking way.”

“We could’ve used my car. My hips could do so much more than just dancing, you know.”

“You’re disgusting.” You elbowed him slightly on the stomach to stop him from giggling, before you focused back on your MacBook. “Now, shoo, my boy. Mommy’s gotta work.”

Haechan had his chin on one of your shoulders. “But Noona~”

“I’m studying.”

“I’m bored~” He whined like the baby that he was, nuzzling his nose against the crook of your neck and you flinched slightly when his breath tickled your skin. “Can we make-out? Please pretty pleaseeeee~”

“Give me half an hour to finish this real quick—”

“Noonaaaaaaa~”

“What?” You were trapped between laughing and acting annoyed about it. “I seriously need to study. Didn’t you tell me to be a responsible adult for today?”

“You could also be a responsible adult by making-out with me though.” He chuckled to himself. “We could do adult things if you—”

“No,” you firmly stated though your smile kept on appearing on your face. You pushed a palm against his cheek, playfully shoving him away. “Now, go away, Dongsookie, I really have to study.”

“Fine,” he exhaled loudly against your shoulder and you could practically feel his pout growing on his face. He didn’t let you go, though. He kind of just sat there behind you, still circling his arms around your waist as he lazily stared at the words you were typing on the keyboard. You had trouble concentrating with the way you could feel every time he took in a breath from how close his chest was pressed against your spine but eventually you got the hang of it.

You were already working on your third page when Haechan suddenly had his lips on the side of your neck, lazily suckling on the skin until you could no longer ignore him.

“Haechannie.”

“Hmm?”

“What are you doing?”

“I’m playing a game,” he murmured against your skin, licking at the soft skin before he nibbled at it with his teeth. “It’s called how fast can I distract my girlfriend from working over a stupid assignment instead of spending time with me.”

“But I am spending time with you, though.”

“You know what I mean.”

And you had to bite your lip because he had a certain kind of pressure on his words that made your skin tingle in anticipation. His lips were soft but scorching hot as he drew bruises on your skin and it felt so good and dangerous at the same time. It was like standing on a bridge made of glass, both exciting and terrifying.

“You know what I think is sexy about you?” He quietly asked, one hand running down your body, slipping under your shirt and hovering dangerously close to your bra. “The way you say my name when we kiss,” he continued, adding a soft moan when he latched his lips around your earlobe.

You shivered, feeling heat growing on your cheeks. “Haechannie—”

“Yes, like that,” he chuckled, his voice suddenly became deeper. “You’re so sexy, you’re driving me insane.”

You tried your best to ignore him, you really did. But the second he had his warm mouth against your lips, his fingers grabbing your face almost forcefully to turn towards him, you just lost it and you found yourself crawling into his lap, tangling your legs around his waist and moaning against his mouth as he was against yours.

“Noona,” he sighed when you kissed down his neck, as if your every touch was a gift that he craved more and more. He shuddered slightly when you had your hand under his shirt and as if you just pushed the wrong button, he suddenly picked you up by the waist, shoved your textbooks away with one swipe of the back of his hand, and laid you down on the carpeted floor in one swift motion.

“If you keep doing that,” he breathed out heavily, eyes glazed as he stared at your kiss swollen lips. “I won’t be able to stop, even if you beg me to.”

You weren’t sure what came over you but you found yourself hooking your fingers around his necklace and brought his face down, whispering, “Then don’t stop,” directly against his lips.

It was all rush and passion and Haechan was not wasting even a second away before he began to undress you, removing each clothing very easily and you secretly wondered just how many times had he done this before from how smooth he unclasped your bra with one flick of his finger.

He pulled his shirt over his head, his silver necklace hanging loosely around his neck. “Tell me if I’m being too fast,” he said, before he climbed on top of you, throwing the piece of clothing away without a care. Your heart jumped at the sight of him, knowing how this could lead to something more but couldn’t really stop him. Not with the way he had his hands reaching down from the valley of your breasts, down to your stomach, his fingers brushing above the hem of your jeans.

His kiss was always breathtaking, to say the least, but it was a bit different this time because it felt like he was losing control of himself. His kiss was almost forceful, his teeth roughly nibbling at your lower lip before he moved down your chin and found his place in the crook of your neck again. His hand was on your chest, cupping you fully with his palm and let out this sexy groan when he felt you gasping his name against his mouth.

“Fuck, you’re just doing that on purpose now, aren’t you?” He hissed, eyes clouded with lust. He peppered kisses down your chest, lips hovering above your nipple when he said, “You’re being cruel, Noona.” You were tugging at his dark locks when he placed it between his lips, sucking at the sensitive spot, and you tried to hold back your moan but failing every time.

Haechan was giggling to himself, his tongue flicking around the bud. “The way you’re reacting to me is so cute. I didn’t know you were this sensitive.” He ran his tongue across his lower lip, staring at you like he wanted to ravish every part of you, which he probably did. “You’re so goddamn cute.”

“Haechannie.”

“Yeah?”

“I won’t be needing that kind of commentary ever again in the future, thanks,” you uttered, trying your best to focus on his touch and not his words because Haechan could be annoyingly talkative sometimes.

He chuckled again, moving along to land a few kisses on your stomach. “If you’re that sensitive here, how sensitive will you be if I touch you right over…” He trailed a finger down from your belly button to the edge of your underwear. His eyes twinkled gleefully before he rubbed your clit over your underwear. “…here?”

You gave your best strength to stay sane but Haechan’s giggle over your reaction only tortured you even further. “Stop playing around,” you hissed under your breath, pretty sure that you were blushing from ear to ear.

“Playing?” Haechan grinned tauntingly, “I’m being pretty serious, though.” He spread your legs, kissing the inner part of your trembling thigh before he hovered dangerously close to the point you could feel his breath down there. You couldn’t help but gulp in anticipation and Haechan knew that. He knew how much you wanted him to take off your underwear and eat you out like it’s his last meal.

But of course, being the little fucking devil that he was, Haechan only threw you his usual smirk and said, “You know I’d do anything for you, right, Noona? You just gotta beg for it.”

“No way.”

“Otherwise, I wouldn’t know.” He faked a pout. “I’m younger than you, you know. I need you to teach me these things.”

You reciprocated by kicking him right on his abs because as desperate as you were, there was no way in hell you were going to grovel at his feet, begging for him to please you. “All right, all right, I’m sorry, geez!” Haechan said, laughing as he successfully dodged two of your first kicks. Soon after, he grabbed your moving legs, carefully placed them on his sides and ran his hands slowly from your legs to your thighs. He took a long glance at your body, sighing like it was some kind of beautiful torture for him to take. “You don’t even realize how hot you are, do you?” He leaned closer and grabbed you by your chin, locking both of your gazes together. “Do you even know how hard I am right now because of you?”

It was a rhetorical question, clearly, because you could definitely tell how hard and hot he was pressing against you, even if his jeans and your underwear were still on the way.

“God, just—” you gasped when he slipped a knee between your legs, pressing it against your core. “Just stop being a fucking tease and fuck me already, Donghyuck.”

And he grinned against your skin. “Fucking finally.” You heard him say under his breath, before he carried you in his arms and moved you to the bed. It felt somewhat scary, how fast he was being, because you had only experienced sex once and it was the painfully awkward kind of sex with your high school boyfriend and you didn’t really have the chance to practice it with anyone else while it seemed to you, at this point, was clearly not the case for him.

Haechan had his eyes on you, all half-lidded with lust and passion, as he unbuckled the belt of his jeans and you had to gulp at the sight. He didn’t really have six-pack abs like Jaehyun—considering your boyfriend was quite an athlete during his senior days—but his shoulders were broad, his chest was toned, his stomach was lean and his skin, as it glistened slightly with sweat, was just absolutely breathtaking.

“Enjoying the view?” He asked, and you knew how he’d always been cocky in his entire life, but he’d never been this cocky. “You’re practically drooling.”

“I am not,” you retorted but you lacked confidence. Haechan grabbed a condom from the pocket of his jeans before he climbed back into the bed with his jeans unbuttoned.

“Why do you already have a condom with you?”

“Because I came prepared.”

“I thought you said you wanted to study.”

“Among other things,” he grinned against your lips and shushed down your next protest. “I will be studying your body, if you give me the chance.”

“That was so lame.” But even your insult couldn’t mask how nervous you sounded, especially when Haechan was settling himself between your legs again, fingers hooking around your underwear.

“Final chance if you want me to stop, Noona,” he said though it felt like it was almost impossible for him to stop. “I’m serious. After this, I won’t stop even if you cry.”

You swallowed your breath, heart thrumming loud against your chest. “Just do whatever you want,” you answered, almost too quiet for even your ears to hear but Haechan’s eyes gleamed in anticipation.

“That’s my girl,” he said, grabbing your thighs and spreading your legs apart before he leaned in to taste your mouth again. “I’ll be gentle, don’t worry.”

You realized you were holding your breath when Haechan wrapped the condom around his length and he had his eyes on you before he pushed in, asking with an unexpected low voice of his, “Ready?”

But he did not wait for an answer and you found yourself hissing when he pushed in, slowly at first and suddenly all at once. You twisted your fingers against the bed sheet, biting your lower lip because it hurt trying to adjust to his size and Haechan was a little bit lost in his own thoughts, muttering, “Fuck, you’re so tight,” under his breath, slightly throwing his head back out of pleasure. “Noona, you’re so fucking tight. Do you know that?”

He leaned closer to you, chest pressing against your breasts as he mouthed against the skin of your shoulder and slowly began to move his hips. “You all right?” He asked, making eye contact after a while and you shakily nodded your head, though the pain was still there. “Then I’ll move faster.”

You almost hit your head against your headboard when he suddenly picked up the pace, thrusting into you hard and deep; it knocked the breath out of your lungs. “Haecha—” you could barely speak at that point, arms clutching tight to his back, nails raking against his spine.

“Fuck,” he uttered between heavy breaths as he sat on his knees, holding both of your legs in the air, almost splitting your body in half and pushed deeper. “How the fuck do you feel this good, I—” he ended his sentence short, kissing your ankle instead, his eyes never leaving yours. “I wanna keep you—you’re so pretty like this, Noona—so fucking pretty—”

Haechan was always good with his words but at that time, he was making incoherent noises at the back of his throat, jumping from one sentence to another as if he was thinking about several things at once and he was running out of time.

“Haechan, wait—s-slow down—” You placed a hand on his shoulder, tears forming in your eyes. “You’re moving too fast—It hurts—”

Haechan was unfocused, but the last two words that slipped from your mouth brought him back to reality. He stopped almost immediately, looking at you with eyes searching your face. “Does it hurt?” He asked and you nodded, your body shaking a little bit. His gaze softened, cupping your cheek in his hand before he slowly pulled out of you. “I’m sorry, come here.” He cradled you into his arms, sitting down on the bed and helped you climb into his lap. “Maybe if we do it this way,” he said, wiping a tear from your eye with his thumb, “You’ll feel better?”

You could feel him twitching below you, the tip of his cock pressing against your folds. Haechan stayed true to his promise, he wasn’t going to stop even if you cried and that’s fine because you didn’t want him to.

“Take your time,” Haechan said, smiling gently in a way that was so not him that it made you feel weird. You could tell that he was trying to keep himself calm and composed even when all he wanted to do was to fuck you senselessly.

He pushed inside again, but let you take control of the pace this time. You slid down slowly, wincing slightly at the friction but it no longer hurt as much. Haechan was staring at you the entire time, unconsciously licking his lower lip when you slowly began to bounce on his lap.

“Kiss me,” he demanded and you did, sharing his breath and his moans, and tangling your hands in his hair. When he felt your body relaxing against him, he grabbed you by the waist and suddenly thrust forward, making you gasp and clenched your legs together.

“Fuck,” he moaned under his breath, hissing at how perfect you felt around him. “Noona, you can be mad at me as much as you want after this but for now let me just—” he groaned, furrowing his eyebrows at the feeling of him sliding in and out of you. “Just let me fuck you the way I want.”

And you found yourself thrown back to the bed with him thrusting into you deep and raw, faster and much more forceful than before. His nails were sinking into your skin from how hard he was holding you by your hips, keeping you still as he rocked his hips forward as hard and as fast as he liked. Expletives were falling from his lips between his low grunts and breathy moans and you couldn’t help but sob a little at how strong he was going. It felt painfully amazing, and you knew your body wasn’t making any sense, and it surprised you when your orgasm hit you like a wave, just a few seconds before he reached his. You honestly never thought that something so painful could also bring this much pleasure and you wanted to be mad at him but you couldn’t even find the energy to keep yourself up.

You fell down to the bed with Haechan toppling on top of you almost immediately, chest heaving fast as he tried to bring back some air into his lungs.

“Holy fucking hell,” he said, breathing heavily at the juncture of your neck. “That was so good. This is probably the first time I—”

“Haechannie.”

“Oh right, shit!” He immediately jumped away, giving you some space and gently placed his palm on the side of your face, checking your condition. “Are you okay? Are you hurt somewhere? Noona, I’m so sor—Yah!“

You pinched him by the nose, glowering at him with the little strength you have left and you didn’t let go even if he was tapping frantically against the back of your hand, asking for time-outs before you broke his bones.

Well, he said you could be mad at him all you want. It was time for him to face your wrath and it was not going to be pretty.

***

It wasn’t long until your name became a famous topic to discuss around the hallway too and it felt weird yet exciting at the same time, because it was true. You were dating Lee Haechan. And no matter how many times you had to convince yourself that it wasn’t solely your imagination, it still felt unreal.

Because Haechan was shining like the sun, and you couldn’t really shine as bright.

It suddenly felt like high school all over again when you’d once dated the Prom King, Jung Jaehyun, where people always talked behind your back, making comments about your face, or your body, or your attitude and how every aspect of your life did not fit the legendary high school prince that was Jung Jaehyun. It had gotten so much into your head that you had to break up with him, and hating yourself for over a year on how weak you’d become.

Dating Haechan was similar but different in the way he treated you. Jaehyun was too kind, not really saying anything back to anyone who said awful things about you and instead, just told you to not pay any mind about it. Haechan was much braver in saying the things that came to mind, so whenever he heard people talking trash about you, he would come up to them with words laced with venom. It was kind of childish, the way he got worked up rather easily, and even more childish when he continued to pout and fume about it even after a whole day had passed.

“Seriously, I said I’m fine,” you once said to him, entering his Hyundai after he opened the door for you.

“Well, I’m pissed off,” he said, unconsciously closing the door a bit too hard, making you flinch slightly. He walked to the other side of the car, sinking to his seat behind the wheel and exhaled loudly.

“Haechannie.”

“What?” His tone was still a bit harsh, but you knew he didn’t mean to shout at you.

“Thank you for defending me,” you softly said, reaching out for his hand. “But at this point, you’re gonna be mad with literally everyone and anger does not look pretty on you.”

“But aren’t you pissed, though? They literally have no business whatsoever to—”

“I know.” You squeezed his hand. “Look if it gets worse, we can always plan out something. There’s this perfect swamp I know outside of town.”

And Haechan couldn’t help but smile. Maybe he was right, that swamp thing could really be your thing. “You and your stupid swamp,” he muttered, shaking his head in amusement as he grabbed your face for a kiss. “Can we have sex at your place today?”

You sighed. It was always like this when it came to him.  “Sure, why not.”

Because certainly, you weren’t complaining.

***

[mediocre-writerr]

invisible string [quinn fabray]

quinn fabray x reader

requested by anon: Hey, I love your writing and I loved Quinn Fabray's miniseries. Could you do a sequel to "Betty", maybe Quinn and the reader meeting in episode 100 and giving them a second chance? I would love :)

pt.1  pt.2 pt.3

*not my gif*

There was once a old folklore. It once said that everyone had an invisible string tying one to their soulmate.

A simpler term for it would be fate.

That everyone decision, good or bad, would lead you to that one person.

The invisible gold string would drag you out of the wrong arms, wrapped all of your past mistakes, and chained your demons back. The one single thread would lead them to you, no matter how far you’ve strayed.

Not many people believe in it anymore because of the time. The time that it takes for the invisible string to tie one another together took far too long, maybe that’s why you didn’t believe anymore.

There you were back at McKinley High School. When Mr. Shue told you that the glee club was shutting down and you were having one last hoorah, you did not hesitate to book a first flight home.

Walking down the hallway with your classic olive green cardigan that made you feel like you seventeen again and straight back into the classroom that made you feel like home.

And there she was the beautiful blonde who held your heart and dropped it all at once, “Y/N,” she let out a breath as her eyes caught on yours.

“Hey Quinn,” you told her with a shy smile, “Long time no see,”

“Yeah, how has college at Penn State?” she asked as the two of you made small conversation in the middle of the choir room.

You shrugged, “It’s been nice, I don’t know if it’s everything I’ve dreamed it would be, but it’s good. How’s Yale?”

The two of you didn’t live far, it wasn’t all the way across the country. It was driving across a few state lines, but you never hung out. In fact, you barely talked after the two of you had broken up.

“Good, good. It uh feels like I’m missing something, but I don’t think I would change my decision,” she told you and you nodded.

She was about to say something else when you heard someone scream your name, “Y/N!” Sam yelled as he rushed over towards you.

You broke out into a big smile as he picked you up from off the ground, spinning you around and around. You let out a hearty laugh as he set you down.

“I’ve missed you!” he told you as he let go.

You smiled, “I’ve missed you too, bud. I wish our third musketeer was still here with us,” you said with a sad smile.

He let out a sigh, “I know, me too,” he turned to Quinn who looked hurt and jealous at the same time. Do you know why? No, but she always has been hard to read.

“Hey Quinn,” he said, giving her a tight hug.

She hugged him back with a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes, “Hey Sam, I’m gonna go catch up with Mercedes. I’ll catch the two of you later,”

You and Sam looked at each other with furrowed brows before eventually shrugging it off.

You thought that coming back here would bring back loads of bad memories from the cheating to the heartbreak to losing Finn, but it didn’t. As the day went on you remembered why you fell in love with her in the first place.

The way she sang, so full of heart. When she crinkled her nose as she smiled. Or how big her heart is for people she actually lets in.

And at first you weren’t too sure, but when the nostalgia of the club forced you guys to sing your iconic duet, it just hit you harder than before.

“I think we need the iconic rendition of Everything Has Changed from Quinn and Y/N,” Mercedes admitted and your heart immediately stopped.

You looked at Quinn who was already staring at you, like she was seeking approval, “Let’s give the people what they want,”

You grabbed your guitar playing the soft acoustic intro, as she stood on the opposite side of the room, both of you unable to look away from the other.

“All I knew, this morning when I woke is I know something now, know something now, I didn’t before. And all I’ve seen since eighteen hours ago is green eyes and freckles in your smile in the back of my mind, making me feel like,” she began to sing and you forgot how soothing her voice was. Like everything in the world kind of faded away at the sound of her voice.

As the song went on the two of you closed the gap between you until you were face to face. The only thing separating the two of you was the guitar that was wrapped across your body.

“All I know is we said ‘hello’ and your eyes look like coming home. All I know is a simple name and everything has changed. All I know is you held the door, you’ll be mine and I’ll be yours. All I know since yesterday is everything has changed,” the two of you sang.

You couldn’t tear your eyes away from her only doing so when they averted to her lips. Like two puzzle pieces that were supposed to fit together, you were about to connect when the sound of clapping tore you from each other. And with one last lingering look, you broke the gaze as everyone was clapping and smiling like we were all seventeen again.

You didn’t know what to do though. Finn was usually the one to give you advice, but he wasn’t here, so you did the second best thing. The boys locker room was empty as his football jersey hung proudly on the wall. The big number five just staring back at you.

“Hey buddy, I’m in kind of a dilemma right now,” you told him honestly, “And I really wish you were actually here to tell me what to do. You were always good at that,”

He probably would’ve chuckled at what you said, recalling the time where he told you to not eat that funnel cake on senior ditch day before the rollercoaster, but you did anyway and puked all over his shoes.

“I think I’m still in love with Quinn and that absolutely terrifies me. I don’t want to get hurt again,” you whispered, tears staring to sting your eyes when you realize he’s not gonna be there to hug you.

“I’ve been so scared to put myself back out there and when I do it just feels like no one compares to him. And God I wish you could be here right now to tell me what to do because you would know, you always did,”

That’s when you heard someone clear their throat. You looked to find the source of the noise, seeing Coach Beiste standing there next to the office door.

“Hey pumpkin, do you mind if I sit here?” she asked as she pointed to the empty seat on the bleacher.

All you did was nod, before wiping your eyes, “I’m sorry, I know I’m not supposed to be here,”

“Eh it’s okay. You aren’t the first girl who’s come in here to talk to him,” she told you with a shrug.

“Rachel come in here too?” you asked.

She shook her head, “Nope,” she popped the ‘p’ in the word, “Quinn, turns out she needed advice of her own and she asked him a question,”

“About?” you asked, curiously.

“I can’t tell you that,” she confessed. 

“Hey Finn,” Quinn told him, staring at the jersey that was hanging on the wall, “God I don’t think I ever stopped loving her. Actually I know I never stopped loving her, but I’m so scared Finn. I don’t know if she’ll give me a shot or anything, but I don’t want to hurt her,” she confessed.

There was a moment of silence, before she continued on again. 

“I’m so scared that I’m gonna hurt her again and she doesn’t deserve that. But if I don’t tell her how I feel then she’s gonna be the one who got away,” she contemplated it for herself for a second, “Do I have your blessing to love her again? I know how much she meant to you. If you do give me a sign, anything,” 

She sat there on the bench for a moment before something fell off the shelf. She let our a teary laugh, “Thank you,” 

After a little more time she left the room as Coach Beiste left her office to pick up the towel that she dropped. 

“I know I’m not Finn, but do you mind if I give you some advice?”

“Please, I really need it right now,”

She smiled, rubbing your back, “Go for it. If Finn was here he’d tell you something like ‘don’t give up on something that would be good for you’. And I bet if he could come down here right now and tell you one piece of advice it would be dont take life for granted. Don’t let the love of your life slip away like he did. I think that was his one big regret, not being with Rachel before he passed. I think he wants you to be happy,”

“And my advice the two of you are mature now. All of the negative emotions and feelings are easier to talk out now. So talk and just go for it, life’s too short to waste another second,” she told you and you smiled at her with teary eyed.

“I miss him,” I whispered, staring back at the jersey on the wall. 

“Me too, pumpkin, me too,” 

After a few more minutes, you hopped back onto your feet and went to find Quinn. You searched every hallway and every classroom for Quinn, but came up empty. Until you found her outside by the football field. There was a little tree made out in his honor, she was looking at it, just staring, contemplating everything.

“Quinn!” you shouted and her head shot up to the name of her voice.

You were making a bee-line straight for her, “Y/N are you-” but you cut her off and kissed her. Your hands grasping her cheeks and pulling her towards you. 

The two of you pulled away and looked at each other, “Everyone deserves a second chance,” 

“Are you sure?” she asked you, a small smile on her face.

“Very, very sure,” 

The invisible string tied her to you. 

[mrwinterr]

Kissletoe

Pairing: College!Bucky Barnes AU x Female Reader

Summary: You’re not a fan of mistletoes. You think it’s an outdated Holiday tradition and an excuse for lovesick fools to steal a kiss. Unlucky for you, college parties are riddled with them this year and someone’s been trying to meet you under one all night.

Warnings: College shenanigans (no one cares in the real world). Smut 18+ (unprotected sex, vaginal penetration & fingering, oral [female receiving], handjob & attempted dirty talk/goofy sex?). Language. Mentions of drugs and alcohol. & bad Christmas pickup lines.

Title Inspiration: “Kissletoe” by 3OH!3

A/N: I’ve never been kissed under the mistletoe let alone attended a legit college party because I’ve been lame my whole life. 🔔 ‘Tis that season! 🎄 Happy Holidays, ya filthy, lovely readers! 🙋🏻‍♀️ Raise your hand if you’re on the naughty list this year! ❤️ Enjoy!

It’s the end of the college fall semester and for the majority of students, the only way to celebrate surviving finals week is to let loose and party, especially right before you’re all forced to go back home to visit family for the Holidays.

“Where do you think you’re going dressed like that?” You hear your friend and roommate Natasha ask.

You stop stuffing your belongings in a box and pause at her question to look down at your current attire - black leggings paired off with an oversized University college-style sweatshirt. You had your hair pulled up in a messy bun, your face clear of any make-up, and lastly your feet were clad in funky, fuzzy socks. This is what you normally wore inside the dorm around her, and you certainly didn’t need to dress to impress just to go home. What was she on about?

“Uh, home? Where else would I be going at the end of the semester?” You reply, an obvious answer.

“Don’t be a smartass,” she retorts, and is quick to follow up when she sees the knowing look on your face and mouth open to retaliate with an even sassy response, “and don’t even start!”

She knew you’d say something like you were exactly that, smart. You in fact had amazing grades and excelled in every course you’d enrolled in. You were confident that you’d aced your exams, so you’re not checking the portal every chance you could get to see if the professor had uploaded your grades yet.

“You’re not supposed to be leaving until Monday,” she reminded you.

“I know, but I mean, there’s no rule saying I had to stay here until then,” you clarify, continuing to pack up more of your things, “I’d rather much get a head start.”

“You’re that eager to get away from me, huh?” She says, feigning sadness.

“You’re the only thing I’m going to miss about college,” you assure her.

College was a different experience for everyone. It was an introduction to the real world. Some used it to start anew, to buckle down and make something of themselves, others used it as an extension to repeat four more years of high school.

You took your studies very seriously, especially if you wanted to maintain your scholarship. It was a known fact college wasn’t cheap and you were fortunate to be here on one. With all that aside, you still knew when to have some fun. After all, all work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy, right? You didn’t want to be that kind of person, you wanted to enjoy your college years, and luckily you had almost a polar opposite friend in Natasha to level you out.

“We just survived another week of finals,” she states, and grabbing your arms to stop you for just one second, “what better way to celebrate than partying?”  

She sees the conflicted look in your eyes, and can tell you’re weighing out the pros and cons. There were a lot of cons: you’d be surrounded by tons of people, most of which were going to be drunk as fuck or high out of their minds on whatever substance was passed around and the threat of getting taken advantage of by some stranger. The pros? You had some steam to let off and this was a chance to gather and see some of your other friends before the Holiday break. ‘Tis the season, right?

“I guess you’re right,” you start, beginning to compromise, “why not? It’ll be like a little send off,” you decide, throwing in a shrug, and that was it.

“We’re college kids, it’s our right,” Natasha shrugs, before digging into one of your boxes and pulling out one of your cute dresses. You could always count on her to help look good too.  

When you both take the short walk to the house, where tonight’s party would be taking place, you abruptly halt at the end of the front porch steps, breaking your locked arms with Natasha.

“Jesus, what’s wrong?” She curses lightly as she almost trips backwards.

“This house…” you start, taking a step back and look up to inspect it, squinting, as if that would do you any good in the dark.

“Yeah?” She asks, a little too impatient, obviously hiding something.

“It’s familiar,” you continue, still trying to find out why it was so. Usually, that wasn’t a good thing...

“Come on. What are you talking about? It’s just a house. Don’t think too much and have fun tonight!” She says, stomping back down the steps and grabbing your arm to drag you up towards the front door.

“I guess you’re right,” you say, giving up again. What were you so worried about?  

“Aren’t I always?” She comments, and is, again, quick to shut you down when she sees you open your mouth. She presses her finger to the doorbell just as your mouth closes, and you both await the host.

You look off to the side and stare at the Greek letters tacked onto the wall. You knew you weren’t going to let it go on trying to find out why this house looked so familiar. Then, just when you’ve figured it out, your eyes widen in realization, the grip around your arm intertwined with Natasha’s tightens, feeling your attempt to slip away. The door swings open and the voice that booms out of the person, verifies your answer.

“Well, well, well...the weather outside sure is frightful, but this,” Bucky Barnes starts out singing before looking only in your direction, “oh, seeing you, is so delightful,” ending in a somewhat serious note.

“God, I hate winter,” you comment off to the side. It earns you a jab from Natasha, silently asking you to play nice.

He greets Natasha and easily lets her slip past him into the house. You call out her name, appalled that she left you alone with Bucky. Wasn’t that some rule? Never leave your friends alone at a Frat party.

“You look beautiful,” Bucky says sincerely when it’s just the two of you, to which you don’t respond, but roll your eyes. You didn’t come here to get seduced or hit on, but nonetheless shiver, and logically you could blame it on the cold weather and not the way that comment from him made you feel, then attempt to get inside the warm house.

"Excuse me,” he says, holding out his arms on either side of the door frames, blocking your entrance both ways, “where is my Christmas kiss?“ he asks, leaning in close to you.

“What the hell are you talking about?” You ask incredulously and back away. You owed him no such thing, but when you see the sly smirk on his lips, and his head signal for you to look up, you discover a traditional mistletoe hanging right above your heads.

Bringing your head back to its regular position, you look him dead in the eyes, “I’m not going to kiss you under the mistletoe, Barnes,” you scoff at his attempt to smooch you.

“Why not?” He presses, shuffling his weight from one leg onto the other, and before you can even give him an answer, you both hear your name being shouted from behind him. Bucky whips his head back and you do your best to look over his shoulder.

It came from your friend Wanda, who was excitedly waving you over to her. You smile and wave back at her, internally grateful that luck was on your side at this moment. Bucky turns back around and stares at you, wondering how to pick back up on your conversation, but when he doesn’t come up with anything, he sighs defeatedly, drops his arms and finally lets you in.

You make your way over to Wanda engulfing her with a huge hug. Natasha was close by, sipping on her drink. You’ll grill her later for leaving you alone with Bucky. She knew not to do that, but she did it at every chance she got. Now, you knew why she brought you to this specific house party.

“You weren’t planning on leaving without a proper farewell, were you?” Wanda asked worriedly. You immediately pieced together that Natasha had ratted you out on your attempt to leave campus and head back home early.

“It’s not forever, Wan,” you assure her. It was literally only for a few weeks, but while everyone would probably only be a few hours away from each other or a few states apart different, Wanda would be flying back to her home country to spend the Holidays with her family. You’ll admit, you could’ve been a little more considerate and sensitive.

“I’ll still miss you,” she says, the admission melting your heart, not even thinking about how the separation would be on others.

“She’s right, it’s not forever,” Natasha interjects, not allowing for any sad vibes on your last few hours of the semester together, “let’s make some memories tonight,” she says before handing you a drink.

Bucky, as hard as he tried to cover it up, rejoins his group of friends, Steve and Sam, sulking. He’d gotten you alone again, but failed, and he vowed to never give up. He had a crush on you, simple as that, but you were playing hard to get, and all this time spent on playing cat and mouse when you could be doing other things.

“Man, just save yourself from any further embarrassment and give up,” Sam tells him while also handing him a drink of his own, which Bucky accepts and quickly takes a swig from.

“Never,” he said, determined and slightly winces at the burn in his throat, his body almost warming in an instant, “I’m gonna get my Holiday kiss.”

“Why do you even care? You’re usually not one behind this Holiday shit,” he asks, looking around the crowded room.

“I’m not, but it gives me a reason to get close to her,” Bucky admits pathetically, staring into the red solo cup before taking the last swig, crushing it in his hand and air balling it to the trash.

“Dude!” Steve chastises him about adding onto the mess they’d have to clean afterwards, to which Bucky shrugs at.

“You can’t expect her to just kiss anyone under the mistletoe,” Steve reminds him. He knew it wasn't an easy conquest for any guy to gain your affection.

“I’ve been a good boy this year, alright, I’m gonna get her to see what she’s been looking for has been in front of her this whole time,” Bucky says trying not to sound or look as predatory as he watched you disappear into the kitchen with your friends.

You suppose the saying rules were meant to be broken, were taken a bit too literal by your friends, even college party rules because you’re left alone again. Wanda had abandoned the trio for some alone time with her boyfriend, who everyone dubbed Vision or Vis for short due to how outrageously innovative he was. Natasha decided to partake in a classic game of beer pong, something you incredibly sucked at, so there was no way she was going to recruit you as her partner nor were you interested in standing there awkwardly watching the game go on.

Surprisingly, the only place that seemed to be of a quiet enough spot to think was the backyard patio. You could see there was a fire lit and some other students scattered or sprawled on the grass. Quickening your pace, you manage to claim a vacant lawn chair next to the fire and hope you’d stay warm and at peace.

There you start to think that being in attendance tonight would’ve made no difference. Natasha was just good at persuading you into things. Call it peer pressure or whatever, but you put your faith and trust in her to not believe she’d ever steer you in the wrong direction, so why were you so bothered being here?

“You know, refusing to kiss someone under the mistletoe is bad luck,” you hear the voice of the reason why.

“I don’t believe in that bullshit,” you respond, watching as he plops down on the empty seat next to you.

“Really? Then why haven’t you been out on a date in so long?” he asks tauntingly.

“How would you know?” You ask a bit offended.

Why was he so concerned about your love life? You were never close with Bucky growing up and if anyone was of an impression you were, it was only because of Steve, who welcomed everyone, and that included you when you moved into the neighborhood when you were a little girl.

All throughout elementary school, until things started developing, puberty probably, it further separated you from Bucky. Steve blossomed a little later in life, so it helped solidify a good friendship with him, the same couldn’t be said for Bucky. You didn’t hate him, just got annoyed by his harmless teasing.

“I’ll have you know I have other priorities,” your attempt at an excuse was subtle, but you didn’t owe him an explanation anyways.

“Sure,” he says in a tone that suggests he didn’t believe you.

You watch as he lights up a cigarette, takes a small drag, and the cloud of smoke puffing out from his lips. He notices your stare and digs into his coat pocket, fishing out the pack before offering you one. You accept and pluck one out of the carton, he follows up with sticking out his lighter and you lean in closer to him to place the end of your stick against the flame.

You weren’t going to deny the relieving effect the nicotine had running through your body. College was stressful and while you weren’t one to abuse substances, a hit every now and then helped calm your nerves.

“So why is it you won’t kiss anyone under the mistletoe?” He asks, leaning back on the plastic chair, his head turning to the side, full attention on you.

He was enchanted by the girl, who grew up into a beautiful young woman, sitting next to him, slowly killing herself with every inhale and exhale of the cigarette between her lips, but you weren’t just attractive to Bucky, you were every bit incredible to him. You were smart, helpful, loyal to your friends and he was just misguided sometimes in life that led you to astray from him.

“It’s just an excuse for guys to steal a kiss from some poor girl...for lonely people to fake love,” you said almost bitterly.

Truth was, you had a bitter experience with a guy who’d led you on in high school after accidentally hearing that he could bet his friends he could get you to make out with him and he’d do so by using a mistletoe as a ruse.

Bucky detected some distaste in your response but decides not to interrogate you on it any further. There’d been a lot of growing up between the two of you since you’d both been estranged during your teenage years, and certain life events were missed on either party. So, where did you both stand in each other's lives now? You weren’t sure if you could call each other friends. It wasn’t easy to avoid Bucky, what with all the mutual friends and classes you shared, including the same street back home.

“I didn’t throw this party just to see everyone before they leave or to celebrate the end of finals,” he reveals, after several, somber minutes of silence, the cigarettes in your hands quickly burning out.

“Then why did you?” You ask curiously, meeting his gaze.

“To see you,” he simply admits. It was vague.

“How’d you even know I’d show up?” You quiz him.

“Because I begged Natasha to convince you,” he freely says, exposing his plan.

You were a smart person, but you couldn’t figure Bucky out. Why would he do that? Or for that matter, say something like that. What was his endgame here?

“Tis the fuckin’ season,” you comment offhand, getting up from the seat to leave. You stomp out your cigarette and prepare to head back inside and bid your farewells.

You’re just about to step through the threshold, when you feel a large hand wrap around your arm, halting you in place in the middle of the sliding screen door.

“Am I really that bad?” He inquires, and you know he’s not asking about just kissing him under the mistletoe anymore. Bucky always wore his heart on his sleeve, no matter how tough he appeared to be. It fooled a lot of people, sometimes you included, but in this moment, he seemed to genuinely be concerned about your perspective about him.

You were too grown to blame how the course of your relationship with Bucky had gone south on silly teenage phases. You knew it was much deeper than that, it was how sad it made you feel.

You’d harbored a small crush on him back then and it was cruel to see him grow into a handsome, charming guy and go out with other girls. He never showed an interest in you in the past and it was getting exhausting trying to get his attention, it was proving to be a distraction in your life, so it was then you’d vowed to focus on yourself and the life ahead of you, a life that didn’t revolve or involve Bucky.

However, a part of you, the risky and impulsive part of you, said you had less than a handful of months left before you were set to walk the stage and graduate. If you did what you were about to do, you could avoid Bucky for just one more semester, then you’d move far, far away and most likely never see him again. With a quick glance up, you give in to the idea of this side of you, lean in and plant your lips on Bucky’s soft ones.

Bucky is left dumbfounded, eyes still half closed when you pull away. He was shocked, caught off guard, and you by a totally different notion. You like him, you’ve always liked him.

It was a decent kiss if anyone would’ve caught it, at least you hoped it appeared it was, and that Bucky could convince you of it being so…

“You said kissing under the mistletoe is for lonely people to fake love...so then why do I feel so alive?” he asks you in a daze.

He doesn't succeed in convincing you.

How you’d both managed to move past that scene at the doorway without raising suspicion was beyond you two. The fact you both found a vacant room was an even more impressive feat at the moment.

“You better have locked that door,” you say, attempting to make it sound like a threat, but with you underneath him, you were anything but.

Shoes scattered along the pathway to the bed, his thick jacket following in suit. You’d managed to pull your lips back from his, but he couldn’t keep his off of yours as they trailed from the corner of your lips, along your jawline and down your neck. You feel his tongue drag just along your pulse, causing your hips to thrust up. You let out a moan at what you felt through his jeans and how he started sucking and nibbling over the spot he’d licked.

“Why? Don’t want everyone finding out how naughty you actually are?” He questions back teasingly with a cocky grin, and as he tugs at the sleeves of his unbuttoned shirt.

You don’t have a comeback for him, but instead you lightly shove him back and try to escape from underneath, hoping to get through to him and show you’re in fact serious. The last thing you wanted was for any of your friends to walk in on you two in the act.

“Relax!” He says, also sitting up and reaching out and pulling you back to him, “I locked it,” he assures, leaning in closer, “not even Santa will know what we’re doing,” then his lips reclaim yours, his tongue delving in your mouth. You’re once more on your back, lips locked and heavy. Had you known kissing Bucky was this good, you’d have kissed him earlier.

Bucky’s hands run up your thighs, snake their way underneath, you feel his fingers ghost over your scantily clad pussy. The tingling sensation causes the feeling in the pit of your stomach to brew.

“You want me to touch you?” He asks huskily while still pecking your lips.

“Yes,” you almost immediately answer, desperate for his touch.

“How bad?” Oh, he knows how bad, but he had so much fun watching you crumble.

“Bucky,” you start to whine.

“Tell me...how bad do you want me to touch you,” he repeats slowly.

“Fuck you,” you bite back. He was really going to make you say it, “I want you to touch me so bad...please, Bucky,” you quickly give in.

Bucky rewards you with a deep kiss as you feel him hook a finger on the thin slit of your panties and pull them to the side. He runs a long finger between your folds, and he pulls his lips away to inhale sharply.

“You’re so wet,” he states the obvious, bringing that same hand up to his lips to lick the pad of his thumb so he could start rubbing circles on your clit. You bite your lip and stare at him, he’s watching you carefully, loving how hard you’re trying to hold back.

“You want to be a good girl?” He asks, and you nod, “then don’t hold back. Stop fighting me, and I’ll make you come hard with just my fingers,” he bargains. You want to call him on his bluff, but he’s the one with the upper hand - literally. “But first…,” he starts, sitting up on his knees, hands back at his sides so he could scoot down lower on the bed, “...I want to taste this pussy,” his voice deep, and almost dangerous.

He pushes the end of your dress up, bunching it at the waist, to reveal your cute underwear. He pauses for a split second, “Holiyay indeed” he says to himself, reading the embezzled design on the front of your thong. You don’t even roll your eyes in annoyance anymore, because maybe if you kept quiet and submissive enough, you’ll finally get to come.

When he rids you of the garment, Bucky uses his fingers to spread your wet lips before running his tongue flat against it, only narrowing out when it reaches your clit. He spends a little more time at your there, circling it with his tongue, lightly kissing and sucking at it. His fingers start rubbing you, tracing the rim of the opening, while his mouth was still busy at work.

You're all but writhing from the buildup, your chest heaving up and down, stomach clenching tight from his doing, not prepared for when he inserts a finger inside your wet hole. You audibly gasped and reached a hand towards him, but he swats it away. You dare pick your head up to watch, and you’re met with his eyes, full of lust, looking up at you, but his mouth still latched onto your pussy. You can feel his finger slide in and out of you slowly, your mouth open displaying how good he’s making you feel.

In fact, it’s too good you’re not in control of your legs anymore as they kick and squirm at the feeling he’s bestowing on you, so he removes his finger away from you only to maneuver into a position where he could hook his arms under legs and basically slam your back down on the bed. You unconsciously start chanting his name, like a silent prayer for him to touch you down there again.

Your head is a little fuzzy, body on fire; you want to burst. Unable to pick up your head, you cast your eyes down on him just in time to see him spit on your already soaking cunt. You watch as he uses his fingers to spread the wetness all over before slipping two fingers inside of you.

The intrusion causes you to groan and back to arch, and you can’t help but grab at any part of the arm that his hand going to work on you, just making sure it doesn't go away until it gets the job done. He chuckles lightly at your eagerness with your hips bucking up at his palm.

“I promised I’d let you come, right?” He points out, which you nod fervently, loosen your grip and attempt to keep your hips at bay, so he could fulfill his promise. You feel his finger push in about knuckle-deep and curl inside, causing you to choke out a dry sob. You begin to bite your lip, hard, when he does it again and again.  

Your hands are on autopilot, trying to heighten the pleasure your body was being coursed with, and they grab handfuls of your breasts, still confined in your dress. You squeeze and squish them together, anything to help you find that release sooner. Bucky’s gaze catches onto your moves and licks at his lips, the sight of your breasts threatening to spill out offers him a taste of what’s still yet to be unwrapped.

He speeds up his efforts, they’re proven efficient as you start clenching tight around his fingers, your arousal also coating the palm of his hand. He whispers tiny praises as you try to recover from the first orgasm. You swallow the lump in your throat and run your hands over your face, almost dazed and bewildered that Bucky was capable of pulling something like that out of you.  

Your legs fall limp on the bed, the silence broken by Bucky, “such a sweet pussy,” he compliments, and you take a peek between your fingers to see his fingers pop out of his mouth from sucking his digits clean.

“Do you want to unwrap your gift?” He asks, crawling over to you. You manage to sit up, your body supported by your propped elbows, so Bucky is slightly hovering over you. You nod at his question and he brings one hand behind your head to swoop you in for a sweet kiss. You use both hands to hold his face in place to make the kiss last just a little longer.

Bucky reluctantly pulls away though so he could grab at the bunched fabric of your dress and pull it over your head, leaving you completely bare in front of him. He swears, eyes running over every part of you before sitting upright on his knees again.

You lean in and reach with both hands to unbuckle his belt, the clinking of metal sounding loud, button popping off in haste, and dragging the zipper down. You yank down at his fitted jeans to reveal the imprint of his hard cock under his boxer briefs. Fuck, he was big, that much you could see. You couldn’t keep your grabby hands away as you palm him through the fabric, his cock twitching at the indirect contact.

“Take it out,” he instructs, and you look up perilously at him, eyes begging him to confirm, “...it’s yours, baby girl,” and it was all the assurance you needed to peel his boxers down.

You wrap your hands around his length and start pumping him languidly. He was already hard and no doubt fully erect, but you immediately found how good it felt in your hands. With every pump, his pre-cum pools at the head, and with each trip your hands make up to the tip, they travel back down with the substance, effectively lathering him up and making him slick enough for an easy entry.

“I want to fuck you so bad,” he admits when you give his member an experimental squeeze, your fingers curl around him, the tips grazing along his balls.

Leaning in to place light kisses to his pecs, you look up at him, “well, you’ve been a good boy, so do it,” you say, hands retreating as you lie back down, “...fuck me, Bucky.”

Bucky lets out a low growl, kicks his bottoms away, and climbs back on top of you. He reaches down to grab his cock and starts running it up and down the length of your sex, causing your body to shudder. You could feel the ridges and just how hard he got before he slowly slid his cock inside. There’s a tiny sting on his entrance as his thick cock stretches your walls.

“Mmm, baby, it’s cold outside,” he starts playfully singing, “...but you, you’re so warm,” kissing your cheek, getting you to relax; not realizing you had held your breath trying to bear through the initial pain, “...and so wet,” he says pulling out with a lewd noise, before thrusting all the way back in, bottoming out.  

He starts off sweet and slow, and while you liked that on some occasion, now wasn’t one of them. Bucky’s cock probed at your spot almost instantly and you found out you didn’t want to prolong the euphoric ending. His hands slip around your smaller frame, pulling your body up, closer to his, while his hips moved in waves crashing harder and harder into yours.

His face buried into the mattress next to your face, you hear his breathy moans, and you love that he doesn’t hold them back the slightest. Who didn’t like to hear how good the other person was making them feel, right? You grip and pull at his hair, while the other gabs at his buttocks, feeling it flex with each snap of his hips, and your legs tangled with his. Sweat that had built up on your bodies make the movements sloppy, muscles beginning to ache, both of you were about to peak.

“God, you feel so good,” he says, picking his head up, his hair matted and messy, he still looked sexy, “...you gonna come all over my cock now?” His words fuel you and your hips start driving into his, making him eat his own words, “fuck, baby, you’re gonna make me cum!”

“Yes, Bucky,” you coo, your hands gripping his sides, loving the feeling of his hard body, slick and warm to the touch, “...come,” you try coaxing him, but one particular thrust rips right through you and your walls start clenching him tighter than the fit.

You only finish the command when you’re riding the waves of the aftershock, “come on, Bucky, I want it...inside, please.” You definitely picked up on the fact that he liked to hear you beg and be specific with your wants.

Bucky soon stills, spurts of his hot cum splatter your walls that continue to flutter around his cock. His climax spreads warmth all over your lower body. Your limbs, both arms and legs, wrap around his exhausted body. He carefully drops his bodyweight on you, mindful of not suffocating you in the process.

When he’s regained regular breathing, using one of his hands, he reaches behind him in search of yours before interlocking your fingers and just holding it, you hold onto each other. Bucky picks up his head and stares at your hand in his, you follow his gaze and join him. They fit with one another perfectly, and even so, the light squeeze he gives it, lets you know it also felt right.

“Well, where have you two been?” Sam says loudly, announcing you and Bucky’s arrival, rejoining your group of friends. Wanda and Vision close to each other, his arm around her frame, Natasha standing in between Sam and Steve, a refilled cup in each of their hands.

“I have been trying to escape this crazed man all night,” you playfully exaggerate.

“And yet you’ve managed to keep failing,” Bucky chimes in smugly, a cute smirk running across his features. This unearthed feeling testing your willpower to keep up with appearance and show resistance.

“Yeah, no thanks to my so-called friends,” pinning the blame on the two females in the room. Wanda turns red, guilty and slightly awful for abandoning you, but Natasha has a different reaction. She’s got that knowing smile on her face. It’s small, but very strong.

You watch as her eyes divert to the ceiling, you follow her gaze and then when you both look back at each other, the smile on her face turns into a full-blown smirk. There’s a collective sound of “oh’s” from everyone, noting the mistletoe above you and Bucky.

Turning to Bucky, who looks like he doesn’t know what to do, just stands there staring at you, not knowing what to expect. You’re supposed to act like nothing happened or reveal anything to your friends just yet, so he mentally prepares for a rebuttal to your impending rejection or insult to kiss him. Nothing could’ve prepared him for what you do instead.

You place a hand on the back of his neck and pull him down to you and smash your lips together. Bucky’s hands immediately grab a hold of your hips, he’d have to get used to the lightheaded feeling when he’s close to you.

The kiss is slow and probably not appropriate to be deemed as a simple traditional mistletoe kiss, but you both can’t help it and continue to allow your lips to slide against one another’s before there’s a rise of cheers, whistling and howls around you, shattering the bubble.

When you pull apart, you reluctantly walk away from Bucky and head to where Natasha stood, steal the cup from her hand and finish off the remainder of her drink, all while staring straight at her. She knew. Only when you’re done with the last sip, you give her the same small, sly smile. There are no words exchanged, and none needed.

“Guess, you have been a good boy this year, Barnes,” Sam jokes, but regardless is proud of his friend.

“Third time's the charm,” Bucky says casually, shrugging like it was no big deal, as if he hadn’t been desperately chasing you all night. You shake your head at his silliness, but nonetheless smile at him, your heart skipping a bit.

Who knew what you’d been looking for was hanging underneath the doorway staring at you face-to-face this whole time?

A/N: I can confidently say, I used one of these Christmas puns as a pickup line on a guy recently and it worked in my favor! Shoot your shot but stay safe in more than one way; these are them trying times. Also, the underwear thing is a real design I saw while looking through Victoria’s Secret sales…lol. 

🎁 Gift me a like, reblog, comment - anything, please! 🥺💖

[cannibalcreepers]

First kiss with the hiliker brothers separately

Aww first kisses with the booooois UwU 

4111 word count

 hopefully you guys enjoy it ^ ^  -------- One-Eye: 

Soft. 

He is so soft, his skin, his hair, his hands, his gaze and gosh his lips, those were the most softest part of this adorable man. But also stinky, sweaty and a little slimy that smelt of sour cheese, no matter how gross he was, One-Eye was like velvet, smooth and soft to the touch, very unlike his two brothers that seemed to be so hardy and covered in wrinkles and calluses. 

So it was no surprise to you when you first placed your lips against his, they were amazingly soft, gentle and inexperienced. You hadn���t really meant to kiss him at the start, it truly was an accident that turned into something you have secretly been desiring ever since coming across the three brothers and you were over the moon that the first of the three was One-Eye. The two of you were doing washing duties, usually you did it on your own or Three-Fingers would do the chore, but today One-Eye wanted to help you since there were some extra loads after the four of you took out a school bus filled to the brim with a college football team, which meant cleaning up any of their stinky clothing for the three boys to wear or use. You were arms deep in scrubbing some pants while One-Eye sat patiently beside you, only handing you dirty clothes and taking the wet ones to put into the other basket. He was such a helpful man, beaming all the while you talked about random stories from your past or some trivia you knew about, sure One-Eye didn’t understand but he was hanging on every word that left your pretty mouth. As you continued on rattling about the types of birds that collected items to woo their female counterparts, you wracked your knuckles against the side of the washing bucket and let out a hiss from how sore it felt, due to how raw and soaked up your skin had gotten from the water. You shook your hand and held it against your chest, having an annoyed look on your face, One-eye reaching over to touch your sore hand gently and let out soft murmurs, lifting your hand up to press a small kiss against the redness, making your cheeks just as flushed. “Thank you, you’re so lovely” You whispered to the cannibal, causing him to give you a large, goofy smile at being able to make you feel better. With your hand now better, being as it was not really that bad of a bump, you went to reach down into the water to grab the scrubber, not realizing One-Eye was doing the same to be helpful, you looked his was in surprise exactly the same time he did and bumping your faces together. Though not only did you smack cheeks but your lips had grazed over each other making you both lean back in surprise, shyness hitting you both at what just happened. One-Eye was first to react, letting out a small nervous snorted laugh, as though what just happened was a silly accident, his eye glancing away and then back at your face as though waiting to see how you would react to the incident. You had taken in a small sharp breath as so many thoughts rushed through your brain, but the loudest was screaming ‘Fucking Kiss Him!’ and so you did. You practically attacked the cannibal's face, hands lashing out and grabbing onto his cheeks, his face going from shy nervousness to complete shock at you coming at his face like this, eye going wide and his arms going up as though he was going to protect himself from an attack. Your lips pressed up against his, unmoving as you both were still against each other until you stopped to get a gasp of air. You had not yet kissed any of the boys since they took you, only just five weeks ago this man you were pressing up against almost ran a pole through your skull and now you were staring into his blue eye that looked surprised by your bold action. Sure you had fucked, or more like been fucked, licked, bitten, grabbed at and pushed around by the other two, with One-Eye not yet joining in possibly out of unsureness or shyness, you assumed as you really didn’t know why he didn’t at least attempt to fuck you like his brothers did. But none had ever properly kissed you either, so the fact that this gentle giant was now the first to kiss your lips was heartwarming, in a twisted way. The man reached up slowly to press his fingers against your bottom lip, tracing over the plumpness and across your cheek until he cupped it, his eye staring at your features as he leaned in closer and continued the kiss, going in soft at the start before pushing it into something more deeper and hungrier, as though he was pent up with need and want, hands moving from your face to your waist to drag you against his body. He was so soft, but his gentleness was starting to tighten and hurt, your pleased moans turning into pained gasps as his grip began to bruise your skin. You had to stop him, pushing back against his chest and speaking sternly “No!….no, not so rough ok”. Your tone surprised the man, his aggressive lusting melting back into his submissive, confused self, his head tilted and expression showing he didn’t understand what he did wrong. “Oh….hun, I…. you were just being a bit rough that’s all” you whispered “You just need to be more gentle, ok?” He nodded in agreement as you stroked his chest gently, leaning in to place a small peck on his nose which caused that lovely goofy smile to come again. “Going to be hard to not want to kiss you all the time now” After a few more kisses, this time more gentle and soft again, you two would return back to finishing the washing, not wanting to receive a stern chiding from Three-Fingers for slaking on the chores. --- Saw-Tooth: Itchy, rough and calloused, this man’s touch was always so intense, even just moving you around left small bumps and bruises on your skin. At the start of living with the three brothers Saw-Tooth would handle you like you were some toy, his expression so tense and he always scowled as he shoved and pushed you around whenever he wanted to have you do something, unlike his usually grunts and gestures to his brothers, mostly the reason he manhandled you so much was simply because he enjoyed feeling your softer skin under his damaged, rough hands. The large man had never kissed you, even when he placed himself onto you or touched you in any sexual manner, Saw-Tooth would always turn his head to the side if your faces ever came into close contact, eyes shifting down or to look elsewhere on your body, as though he was not ready for such an intimate act while you both were just letting out your pleasures. The closest he has ever gotten was running his slimy, fat tongue along your neck and up to your cheek, which may as well be a guilty pleasure of yours despite how grossly stinky their breaths were. It was now week 5, a whole month and 1 week had passed since you began your new life with the three boys and things were looking better than they were from week 1. You’ve proven yourself more freedoms, though there was always one of the boys by your side at all times, you were allowed a little bit of privacy when going to the bathroom or having a little nap inside the hut, but outside you were always watched and supervised. The pushing and bullying had gone down a bit, as though the excitement of a new plaything had died down and they were becoming comfortable with a fourth person living amongst them. Saw-Tooth was still forceful and gave you a bit of a stank-eye here and there whenever you did something odd or stupid, even if it amused the other two boys. You were mostly always watched by one of the younger boys, but today was the rare chance of Saw-Tooth watching you and it was purely not his choice. The large brute had gotten two make-shift spears through his thigh and hip thanks to some very determined hikers who fought back, though it was all in vain as all had ended up being slaughtered and stored to be the next few days’ meals. So now Saw-Tooth sat on the large wooden chair on the hut’s porch, a glass of unknown red fluids in one hand and his damaged leg covered in bandages, his eyes watching you craft some new arrows. You could feel his eyes boring into the back of your head, wondering why he couldn’t just stare into the scenery instead of making your feel scrutinized and judged, even if he was simply just staring it was making it difficult for you to work on the fletching of the arrows you were crafting, with a annoyed mumble you looked back at the staring giant and raised a brow. “Is there something you need or are your eyes just glued staring towards me?” You snarked, a little cheeky grin splattered on your face. The big cannibal let out a short huff and narrowed his eyes, but he kept his gaze on you as he lifted a hand and gestured for you to come over, in which you complied though you stilled let out a few annoyed grumbles that you were being disrupted, but it was better to do as you're told than anger a very wild beast, not that you think Saw-Tooth would ever kill or maim you for simply ignoring him but he sure would leave a large hand mark from where he may grab and pull at you. 

When you walked over and were at grabbing range, he reached over and took hold of your arms in a surprisingly gentle way, pulling you towards him so that you straddled his good leg, his hands moving from your arms to rest on your hips instead, thumbs pushing your shirt up to rub at your skin. “I don’t think your legs healed up enough for any rough action” You commented, putting your hands on his chest to keep yourself propped up, watching his expression to see how he would react to you slowly explore his features. He was definitely not a pretty man, he was always so sweaty and hairy, covered in scars, lumps and either drool or blood, it being his own or a victim you'd never know. Your hands would caress up past his neck towards that shaggy, tangled up beard of his, always dirty and filled with fluids or dirt, he smelt as bad as he looked but by now you were getting used to the scent, he would only close his eyes and let out a soft grumble when you pressed you thumb against his jaw and traced the bone structure towards his ear and past up into his messy hair, feeling how oily and tangled it was. He was silently enjoying the gentle caresses and affection, allowing you to run your fingers through his hair and drag your nails along his scalp causing him to let out a more deeper groan at how wonderful it felt. You were smiling to yourself at how much control you were currently having over the usually cruel giant, how he was just melting like butter under your touch. Biting at your bottom lip, you took the chance to run your hands back down towards his mouth, the exposed flesh and teeth from where his upper lip was so deformed it gave the man a forever scowling expression, pressing your thumb against his bottom lip caused Saw-Tooth to open his mouth and trace his tongue along your thumb, his dark eyes now open and stared into your own which made your breath hitch in surprise at how gentle he was being right now, considering every other time you felt like you were almost going to die with how rough he always was. You had to take the chance now, with how relaxed and sweet Saw-Tooth was currently being, you knew you would never get such a rare moment for a very long time. Removing your thumb from his wandering tongue and large bottom lip you placed both hands on the sides of the man’s face, checking his reaction to see if he was going to pick up on what you were planning and throw you off, but there was nothing other than a blank calmed expression.  So with sharp intake of breath you leaned in fast and closed your eyes as you were heading in towards his mouth, the large cannibal’s brows going up in surprise but he did not move away or make a sound as your lip clashes against his exposed teeth and enlarged bottom lip. It was not exactly the softest kiss, his taste was sour and oddly meaty, with how deformed his mouth was you didn’t really expect much action for a kiss, but when Saw-Tooth began to shift your eyes shot open and you were about to get off the man only to be stopped as he wrapped his large arms around your back and pulled you in deeper against his body and mouth, opening it up to drag his tongue along your lips, forcing it past them to get inside. You didn’t struggle against Saw-Tooth, you knew better than that, it was better to comply and welcome his advances, which to be honest was not really that bad of an idea with how sensual and intimate the large cannibal was being for once. His grip was usually so harsh and tight, but at this moment he was being so gentle, you were surprised that he wasn’t squeezing the life out of your body with how his arms enveloped you, his tongue rolling against your own causing you to let out moans, you eyes had once against shut as you soaked in the loving attention. But like all things in this forest, it was short lived.  A sharp, high-pitched laugh snapped you out of your hot and bothered state, almost causing you to bite down on Saw-Tooth's tongue as you pushed back off him and out of his arms in surprise at being caught by a snickering, grinning Three-Fingers and wide-eyed One-Eye. The eldest brother let out a displeased grunt and shot the youngest a frustrated look as he giggled and babbled in a mocking way before pointing to four dead bodies the two of them had just dragged from the forest, this catching Saw-Tooth’s attention enough to slowly get up and help the boys with the fresh meat. You were quite flustered and just as frustrated, letting out small huffs and muttering under your breath about their bad timing, but work was work and you had to return to crafting the rest of those arrows, plus you knew once the large man was finished helping he was going to give you more than just a kiss. --- Three-Fingers: Cruel, cunning and conniving. The youngest Hilliker was an evil little weasel, always skittering around and giggling his manic laugh, he was terrifyingly accurate with his kills and hunts, if you hadn’t been taken in you knew you’d be slaughtered like a pig. But now it was week 5 with living with them, you had proven yourself trustworthy enough to take on hunts and killing people, as well as basic chores to earn your right to belong in their strange mutant family and now you were currently on a walk with the thinly, small cannibal to check on the traps littered around the forest. The first time you went on trap checking with Three-Fingers, he was very pushy and snappy with you at times, though still showed patience as he understood you were new to this type of work and had to learn. Now though, you could handle the traps without being watched over, you were quick and diligent when setting them up and though you didn’t need it, you loved whenever Three-Fingers came over and praised you with shoulder pats and happy chittering noises. The two of you had spent almost four hours going around checking the perimeter of the forest, reaching the area of the large waterfalls, the sky was starting to darken with heavy grey clouds, you were looking up at them as Three-Fingers was tightening a trip wire. “Hey….I think we should start heading back, looks like it’s going to start raining” you piped up, looking over at the youngest Hilliker as he finished off with the trap and made his way over to you, glancing up at the sky as well, baring his teeth slightly as he nodded and let out a few incoherent grumbled words which you assumed was a ‘yeah, let’s go back’ You doubted you both would make it back to the hut in time, the clouds above growing darker and angrier to the point it had pushed both you and Three-Fingers to start running, but nature was not having it and heavy rains started falling from the sky, a crack of lightning following right after. The two of you were soaked like drowned rats and home was still another hour and half walk away, your shoes completely filled with water with mud all over your legs, you knew if you stayed out in the rain any longer you were definitely going to catch a cold. Three-Fingers was looking around frantically, grabbing your hand as he pulled you through the density of the forest, you trusted his sense of direction, but there was still a slight doubtfulness in the back of your mind saying that he got you both lost, thankfully that doubt was squashed out when you saw  the small cannibal had taken you both to a cave, pulling you under the rocky cover. The both of you were quick to start a fire and get your wet clothes off until you both were just in your underwear, which mostly consisted of you wearing a dirty undershirt and some fairly loose, dirty, boxers whilst Three-Fingers had the most nastiest tighty-whities on, or what should be whities as they were no longer white and now stained in multiple colours of brown, yellows and red, despite your attempts to washing their clothing the stains never came out. You were huddled around the fire, hands out to feel the warmth as you shivered, the rain heavier than ever with the lighting cracking across the sky, you were trapped until the storm passed, it wasn’t safe to travel in such a heavy storm in the mountain forest after all. The scrawny cannibal had settled right next to you, watching as you shivered from the cold so he scooted closer and reached one of his arms around you and pulled you in close to cuddle up. He was such a boney, thin and pasty man unlike his more plumper, larger brothers, but that didn’t stop his hugs and cuddles from being just as warm and soft. You leaned in close to Three-Fingers, feeling his oversized deformed fingers wrap around your shoulder and pull you in against his pasty chest which you placed your head against and stared into the fire. Despite the situation, it was almost romantic, sitting by the campfire and holding onto each other, the two of you rarely ever got to have such simple, quiet moments when it was always so hectic at the hut with the brothers and even when you both did get more private alone time it was always short lived, though at least with Three-Fingers, sex was much more gentler than with Saw-Tooth, but it was still just as intense, and just like his brothers, he never really gave you a proper kiss other than running his tongue over your cheek or biting your neck. A large crack from the lightning snapped you from your thoughts, looking out the entrance of the cave at the rain, Three-Fingers chittering softly and running his deformed hand through your hair. “I’m all good, it’s just cold” You said softly, looking up at the cannibal with a sweet smile who responded by leaning in and placing a small peck on your lips which was a surprise for so many reasons and by how the cannibal cackled your reaction must have been priceless. This cheeky bastard thought he could place his very first proper kiss on you so lightly and like it was nothing, oh no he was not getting away with it and you voiced that very loudly to him as you grabbed the sides of his face quickly “Oh no you don’t, we’re doing this now” You laughed, attempting to pull Three-Fingers down to give him a proper kiss, but the man was giving you a bit of a struggle as he bared his teeth in a playful manner and leaning as far back away from you as he could, letting out his signature laugh as you started to wrestle the man  for that good kiss. “Hey! Get your scrawny ass here and let me lay one on you!” You were trying to pin the wriggling Three-Fingers but only being able to land the kisses on his cheek or nose. You finally were able to pin him down long enough to narrow your eyes and go in for one more strike, if you missed this was going to be the last time and it seemed the man knew this too as he stopped struggling and accepted your smooches that you have been so aggressively trying to place on him. Finally being able to place a kiss on the toothy feral cannibal was satisfying, you would finally get to taste and feel him against your lips and to be honest it was not exactly the best but it was the best you’d ever get in your current situation. Just like his brothers, Three-Fingers taste so sourly disgusting, like you were kissing a rotten cheese carcass that had sharp teeth and a perverted tongue that was currently pushing itself into your mouth. He was making the kiss deep, his hands reaching up to tangle through your hair, his long pointed nose pressed up against your cheek. You laid atop of him, heart beating and face flushed, completely ignoring your surroundings for the passionate kiss with the deadly murderer that the both of you hadn’t even realized the storm had passed on. A deep moan lifted from your lips as Three-Fingers hands started to explore your body, his mouth leaving love bites along your jawline and towards your neck, forcing you to sit up more and straddle him. He grabbed the ends of your undershirt and you began to lift your arms up to allow him to take it off only to let out a yelp as something bit your thigh. You looked down to see what in the world was making your leg itch and feel sore only to see that during the passionate kissing you both had rolled onto an ants nest that had now gotten riled up and the ants began attacking by biting you both. You let out another ‘ow!’ as you got bit again and jumped up from the ground, swiping at your legs and helping Three-Fingers to his feet who was doing the same, scowling all the while at the mood being killed by a bunch of insects. “Christ…damn it.....” You hissed, looking around at the ground and then towards the fire by the entrance, noticing that there was no more storm. “well at least the rain stopped.” You pointed out, rubbing at your now sore red bite marks, the ants were harmless but their bites still itched. “Let’s get dressed and head back, rub some creams on these…” Though he was annoyed, Three-Fingers nodded in agreement, his poor bottom had gotten attacked by those little bastards and now itched like crazy, but the thought of you rubbing cream all over it ass cheeks lifted up his spirits. The both of you would put on your now, slightly drier, clothing and kick the fire out. It was a long walk, but you both eventually made it back to the hut and you both couldn’t wait to lay down on the bed and wrapped each other in the warm blankets, right after tending to your little ant bites. 

[avengerscompound]

Until the End of the World - 18

Until the End of the World: A Captain America Fanfic

Masterlist PREVIOUS //

Buy me a ☕ Character Pairing:  Bucky Barnes x Steve Rogers x F!Reader

Word Count:  2763

Rating:  E

Warnings: pregnancy, labor, induction without consent, forced medical proceedures, mentions of forced pregnancy, action, violence, death

Synopsis: Four years after Steve and Bucky got to the bottom of the HYDRA conspiracy that had led to you and your son being hunted for the first three years of his life, you, Bucky, and Steve have carved out a nice life together.  Things are calm and you feel like a family unit.  When Geo starts calling Bucky and Steve ‘dad’, a decision is made to try and add to your family.

Things aren’t as calm as they seem.  When your pregnancy hits the papers, HYDRA rears its head once again, and Steve and Bucky need to track you down to protect the family they had created

Chapter 18

You had sent Geo back to his bed with his instructions.  You didn’t think you could get out of here with him without getting caught.  Yes, he could open all the doors for you, but there were still guards, and you had no idea where you were.  The risk was just too high.  Not to mention, that if Viper had been telling the truth, there were other people here who were being experimented on again.  If you could get Steve, Bucky, and the rest of the Avengers here, then that was the best option for everyone. You hoped Geo could do as you asked; if you could send a message to the tower - however primitive it was - you trusted that FRIDAY could work out that it was Geo sending it.

You slept badly.  The bench was hard and uncomfortable, and they had provided no blankets or pillows.  That teamed with the stress of you and Geo being captured, and how close you were to your due date, you were uncomfortable and highly wound.  Even with the lack of sleep, a group of HYDRA guards still managed to startle you awake the following day.

They had no concern about treating you gently in your heavily pregnant state.  They didn’t even shake you awake, so much as march into the room, grab your arm, and drag you out of bed and down the hall.  You had trouble walking and you stumbled down the bright white hall as they dragged you along with them.

You were brought to a room with a hospital bed and a lot of medical equipment, as well as a sterile-looking sofa chair and a clear plastic bassinet and incubator.  It looked like a delivery room in a hospital that cared nothing for the comfort of the mother.  Viper was waiting there with a group of medical staff dressed in green scrubs.

“What’s going on?  Where’s Geo?”  You asked.

“Geo is safe,” Viper assured you.  “And we’ve decided we’re going to induce labor.  Staying in this location is risky, so within the week we’re going to move you.  We figured if we move you and your children separately, you’ll be less likely to try and draw attention to yourself when we inevitably see other people.”

“I’m not due yet,” you argued. 

“It’s not ideal, I know,” Viper said as the guards muscled you onto the bed and strapped you down.  “But it’s close enough.  We did consider just cutting that little thing out of you, but they said this way would be safest.  Don’t make me change my mind.”

One of the medical staff inserted a cannula into your arm and another began doing an internal examination as two of the guards held your legs apart.  You tried to fight them, but there were just too many of them.

“Don’t worry though, dear,” Viper said.  “We decided to help keep you calm you’re going to have an old friend here to help you with your labor.  A birthing partner.  That’s what they call them isn’t it?”

You looked at her wild-eyed, completely confused, and panicked.  You had no idea why she was doing this.  If they really wanted the baby out, a c-section would be quicker.  Though you guessed, with the surgical recovery time it would be harder to move you unnoticed.  The whole thing just felt like mind games though.  Like she was trying to show you exactly what kind of control she had over you, both your mind and your body.

There was a pop and a gush of water between your legs as the doctor broke your waters and you began to cry.  “Why are you doing this to me?”

She patted your cheek.  “Consider it your payment for evading us for so long, and destroying my whole operation,” she said.  “Or at least a down payment.  I don’t plan to make anything easy for you.”

She tapped your cheek again and strode to the door.  Just as she reached it, she turned and looked at one of the doctors.  “If she behaves, you can let her up, but if she does anything to mess with this labor, strap her down again.”

“Yes, Madame HYDRA,” he said, saluting.

She left the room and the doctors went back to fussing around you.  They put monitors on you that seemed to track both yours and the baby’s heart rate.  When they seemed to be done most left without a word.  One doctor remained.  He had a sharp face and dead eyes.  “If I let you up, will you behave?”  He asked.  “I warn you, if you take any of this off, you’re risking the life of that baby.”

You nodded.  “I’ll behave,” you agreed.

Your restraints were unfastened.  There are guards at the door, not that you can get out,” he said.  “And you are being monitored on cameras all over the room.  Behave and we’ll be in to check on you regularly.” 

As he left a woman was led in.  She looked like a wild animal that had been caught in a trap.  Her hair was lank and didn’t look like it had been brushed in weeks and her hollow eyes looked around wildly.  She was wearing a simple floral nightgown and in her arms was an infant that couldn’t have been more than a few days old.  It took you a moment to realize you knew her.  She had been in the medical trials back when you were in college.  “Azi?”  You said.

She turned to look at you startled, furrowing her brow as she assessed you.  “Oh my god,” she said and rushed to your side.  “Oh my god!  What are you doing here? I didn’t know they had you too.”

“How long have you been here, Azi?”  You asked.

She shook her head.  “I don’t know.  A long time. I don’t know.  They came right after the trial ended.  I wasn’t pregnant then.  Now I have a baby.  They move us.”

“Oh my god,” you said, wrapping your arm around her.  “Come, sit down.”

You led her to the sofa chair and she sat, cradling the baby.  It fussed a little but fell back to sleep as its mother held it close.  “Azi, what did they do to you?”

“They took me… and some of the others in the test,” she said.  “They’re all dead now…” her eyes snapped up to you.

“They’ve been chasing me.  This is all my fault,” you said.  A dull pain throbbed out from your back and sides, and you winced and gripped the IV stand.  Azi looked up at you alarmed.

“Are you in labor?”  She asked.

You nodded.  “They just induced me.”

“Did they… did they …?”  She asked.

You shook your head.  “No.  No… I think they were waiting.  I’ve been living with someone.  Some men.  I think they were waiting to see if we’d just end up having kids.  What… how… did they force someone on you?”

She shook her head.  “It was a medical procedure.  I know whose it was… I think… do you remember Gal?”

You nodded.  Gal was short and funny and you remembered during the tests he always got telekinesis.  He thought it was funny to tap people on the shoulder while he was standing on the other side of the room.  “You think he’s dead?”

She nodded and then shook her head.  “I think… I don’t know.  They were injecting us with things, to make our powers come back, but it wasn’t working.  Katrina died.  And Shae.  And … and…”

“It’s okay,” you soothed, rubbing her back.  “It’s okay.”

She looked up at you with wide brown eyes.  “If I die, will you take care of my baby? You were always stronger than the rest of us. You’ll look after him.  Get him out of here.”

“Shh…” You whispered, crouching down.  “We’re gonna both get out of here.  Okay?  And your baby.  What’s his name?”

“I called him Gal.  I think… I think that’s only fair,” she said.  “Promise me you’ll take care of him.”

“I promise.  But you’re going to do that yourself, okay?”  You assured her, hoping that Steve and Bucky would come for you soon.

Whether it was the drugs they were using or the fact it was your second child, you couldn’t be sure, but your labor seemed to progress very quickly.  Once Azi got used to being in the room with you, she became a little more of a comfort to you.  She put baby Gal into the bassinet and would rub your back and soothe you through the contractions.  Not that there was much she could do.  Having someone on your side was better than being alone with HYDRA scientists, but all you could think was how much you needed Bucky and Steve.  Even if they did find you now, they were going to miss the birth of their daughter, and the longer your labor progressed, the harder it was to hang on to hope they’d find you at all.

Azi rubbed your back through a long contraction as you bent over the bed.  You’d been left alone again, but you knew it wouldn’t be long until the urge to push hit you.  You were in that period of serious pain where everything felt helpless and all you wanted to do was be with your boyfriends and curse them out for doing this to you.  Instead, you were in pain and terrified and with a woman who was even more scared than you.  Gal slept in the bassinet and part of you was even concerned that if you made too much noise would wake him and take Azi’s attention off you.

“You’re doing great,” she soothed.  “I think it won’t be long.”

“I don’t want them to deliver her,” you whined.  “I don’t want to do this here.”

“I know,” she said.  “I know.  I’m here.”

A siren started sounding, waking Gal so the baby's cries blended in with the harsh screeching of the alarms.  Azi looked around and hurried over to the infant.  “Hey, mommy’s here… I’ve got you,” she said, lifting him and holding him so one ear was pressed to her chest and the other was covered by her hand.  “What is that?”

Hope began to creep in again.  They’d found you.  You knew it.  It was only a matter of time before you’d be safe again.  You might even get to have this baby with them there with you.

Another contraction hit and you felt the need to push.  With Azi distracted with Gal and the sirens sounding, you weren’t sure what to do.  “Oh god,” you groaned, gritting your teeth and resisting the urge.

The sirens stopped and you heard footsteps run down the hall.  You couldn’t be sure, but you had a feeling they’d left you unguarded.  Another contraction hit and as it was ending the doors opened.  “Mommy,” Geo cried as he ran over to you.  “I don’t wanna be here.”

“I know,” you said, rubbing his back.  You looked around unsure what to do.  If you stayed here, then you were somewhere set up to deliver a baby, and hopefully, it wouldn’t take too long for Steve or Bucky to find you.  The problem was if you stayed here all of HYDRA knew where you were too, and if they were going to try and take you out of here before Steve or Bucky could get to you, then staying here let them do that.

You gritted your teeth.  “Geo,” you said.  “Do you think you can get the building to take us to a safer room?”

He nodded and took your hand.  “Azi, let’s go.”

She didn’t move and you doubled over in pain as another contraction hit.  “Mommy?”  Geo said, looking at you in fear.

“It’s okay, Geo,” you assured him.  “Your sister is coming.”  You looked back to Azi.  “Azi!  We have to go!”

She jumped and followed after you.  Geo led you out into the hall, clinging to your hand and pulling you along.  There were the sounds of shouting and gunfire, but while none sounded close yet, it was rapidly getting closer.  It was coming from several different sides and you began to worry that there wasn’t going to be anywhere safe to go.

Another contraction hit as you turned a corner and you almost collapsed to your knees.  The urge to push was intense and you had to consciously clench.  You were worried she might already be crowning.

“Mom, please,” Geo said, a look of pure panic.  “They’re coming.”

You tried to move, but all you could manage was a few staggered steps.

“Stop them!”

Azi jumped and you flinched at the sound of Viper’s voice as she came around the corner.  You pushed Geo behind you and tried to get him to move him forward.  Azi squared up, holding her baby so he was slightly protected.  “Get away from us!”  She screamed.

“There’s no use running, you idiots,” Viper snarled as the guards moved forward.  “Where do you think you’re going to go.”

Azi pushed Gal into your arms and charged at the guards, a look of wild rage on her face.

“Azi! No!”  You screamed.

Everything happened in slow motion.  Azi charged at them hands up like she was going to claw their eyes out and lept at the guard closest.  He stumbled back, and the gun went off.  Azi’s face froze as blood erupted out of her back.  You pulled Geo close as he began to wail and hid his face in your side.  For a second you weren’t even aware of the alarms going off again, as both Geo and Gal were screaming.

“Geo, run, go,” you said, pushing him forward.  He wouldn’t let go of your hand and you were worried that you weren’t going to be able to convince him to move.

“You idiots!  We needed her!”  Viper screeched.  “Get out of my way!”

She ran at you and you pushed Geo forward in an attempt to get away, knowing full well in your state you weren’t getting anywhere.  You managed to waddle forward a few steps as loud blasts erupted behind you.  Viper grabbed your shoulder and yanked you back.  You held Gal closer to you, sure she was about to make you drop him and a gunshot ran out behind you.

Viper’s grip relaxed and she slumped to the ground behind you.

“Daddy!”  Geo shouted as he looked around your legs.

You spun around.  Behind you, the hall was complete chaos.  The lights were flashing red and white and there were some of Iron Legion rounding up the few guards that Viper had with her.  Ari’s body was on the ground and one of the Legion seemed to be assessing it, while Viper's body lay at your feet. 

Bucky hurried down the hall, shouldering his rifle. “I’m here,” Bucky said, scooping the boy up.  “I’ve got you.”

Geo buried his face in Bucky’s neck and gradually the alarms calmed down and the lights settled.  Bucky put his arm around you.   “I’ve got you, darlin’,” he said.

“Oh god, Bucky,” you said, the emotions breaking as you started to tremble in his arms.  “Take the baby.”

He took the infant from you and you held his elbow as another contraction hit.  “Is this her?”  He asked.

You shook your head.  “No…” you said through gritted teeth.  “But she’s coming.”

“Shit,” he cursed.  “Come on.  Let's get you somewhere safe.” 

Geo pointed to a door and Bucky helped walk you to it, even as your body fought you moving at all.  “I need one of you to guard,” Bucky barked at the Legion.  One flew into place, standing at the door with its hands up and repulsors at the ready.

Bucky moved you inside and your knees buckled - like you’d been holding out until you had even one fragment of safety.  Bucky kneeled down beside you, still juggling Geo on the baby.  Geo was clinging to him like a koala and he hadn’t lifted his head from the spot in Bucky’s neck since he’d lifted the boy into place.

“Let me see,” Bucky said.

You got on your hands and knees and lifted the gown they’d put you in, spreading your legs until you were as comfortable as you could be.  Bucky sucked in a sharp breath through his teeth.  “Steve, you read me?” He said.  “I’ve found them.  And I’d suggest getting to us as quickly as you can if you wanna see your daughter born.”

// NEXT

[farfromsugafanfic]

Lock & Key

Genre: Best Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Angst

Pairing: Jungkook/Reader

Warnings: cursing, dirty jokes

Synopsis: When Jungkook ditches you on your birthday, your friendship looks like it’s about to crumble. Your friend group becomes tired of your bickering and decides to take the matter into their own hands. Somehow, you and Jungkook find yourselves handcuffed together.

"Have you guys found a present for Y/N yet?" Jin asked, picking up his third pizza slice and taking a large bite, the cheese stretching as he pulled it away from his lips.

"You haven't gotten it yet? Her birthday dinner is tomorrow," Taehyung said. His eyes were tired, but he'd still insisted on joining the party despite having just gotten off a long train ride, as he hadn't seen his friends from high school for months. "I got her the first two manga in that series she's been wanting to read."

"Mmm," Jin said, seeming to consider Taehyung's choice of gift. "I need mine to be really special. He finished his pizza to the crust and turned it 180 degrees and bit into the end. "Jungkook, you're closest to Y/N. What are you getting her?"

Jungkook turned, wide-eyed towards Jin. The younger's face was already a bit flushed from the beers and from the mention of your name. "I'm paying for her part of the meal tomorrow and I got her tickets to that musical that's only in town for one night."

"Woah, that's gonna be hard to beat," Jimin said, "Y/N hasn't stopped talking about that musical since they announced it. Remember how she went crazy over it in the group chat?"

"I'm sure Y/N will like whatever you get her," Jungkook said. "She isn't very picky and she'll appreciate it because it came from you."

"I know. I just have something special planned and I want it to be perfect." The six other guys looked to the eldest expectantly. Jin sighed. "Gosh, fine, I'll tell you. I plan on confessing to her tomorrow."

"What? You like Y/N?! Since when?"

"Woah, congrats man!"

"You'll make such a cute couple."

The group fell to chaos, but Jungkook was notably the least excited. At the mention of Jin's plans, he sunk back against the wall and took a large bite of his pizza, followed by a gulp of beer.

"I'm not sure when I started liking her," Jin said. "I just kind of realized that I do. I figured we are friends and I'll regret it if I don't give it a shot."

"Are you sure her birthday is the best time to confess?" Jungkook asked, finally piping up. "What if things don't go well and you ruin it? Are you going to do it in front of everyone?"

"I thought about it and I'm going to wait until after the meal. Maybe I'll be able to steal her away for a few moments after she opens our gifts."

Jungkook's nose wrinkled and he was obviously unsatisfied with the answer. Yet, he dropped it and reached for another slice of pizza. "Why does it matter to you Jungkook? It's not like we all still won't hang out or that you'll never see her."

"Y/N's been hurt before. I'm sure you remember how upset she was after Minsung. I had to sleep in her bed for two weeks because she'd wake up crying. I never want her to feel that hurt again."

"Jungkook, I won't hurt her. She's more likely to hurt me. Why do you care so much about her heart being broken anyway? You're not the one who broke it and you aren't responsible for fixing it. Y/N's a big girl, she can handle herself."

Jungkook pouted. "I have to pee," he said, standing up and leaving the room, carrying his pizza slice with him.

vVv

An array of appetizers were spread across the table, a few bites taken from each. You were just waiting on the last three to show up: Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook. You expected them to come together as they had been nearly inseparable in high school. As Jin finished off one of the appetizers, you spotted Jimin and Taehyung walking in. You got up and rushed towards them.

"Happy birthday!" Jimin and Taehyung said, nearly tripping each other as they ran to hug you. "It's been too long, Y/N!" The two boys had moved out of the city for college and you rarely got to see them. You didn't know what you do if Jungkook--your best friend--had gone with them.

"I'm so glad you guys could make it! Come on and sit down, we're just waiting on Jungkook."

The appetizers were gone and the missing chair at the table remained. Worry grew in your throat and you glanced down at your phone for the umpteenth time to see if he had texted you. Even, just a simple "Running late!" or "Stuck in traffic!" would calm your nerves.

"Have you guys heard from Jungkook at all?"

The other guys all shook their heads and gave you sympathetic looks. You'd put off ordering, but it'd been nearly an hour since most of you arrived and you didn't want to keep the staff waiting any longer. "All right, let's order."

"I'm sure he just got stuck in traffic or something, Y/n," Jin said, reaching out and tapping your hand.

Your heart dropped as you read his last reply. You felt tears stinging your eyes, but you pushed them back before the other guys could notice.

"He's not coming," you said.

"What?" you heard someone ask, but you were too focused on not allowing your spiraling thoughts ruin your birthday and holding back tears to register who it was.

"He said he got a date or something. I don't know, but come on, we can enjoy this without him."

Due to the solemn looks on their faces, you knew they saw right through your facade. You and Jungkook had been best friends since elementary school where he accidentally trampled you when he was racing his friends. Despite ending up with a badly skinned knee and a couple of bruises, you were fine, but Jungkook had insisted on taking you to the nurse's office anyway. He pretended to sprain his ankle just so he could sit and keep you company.

What had happened since then? You'd never felt like your friendship was dwindling when it came to Jungkook. Whenever either of you dated, it didn't make a difference. High school graduation didn't separate you. Not even when Jungkook forced you to a haunted house in high school and laughed when he saw the stain on your jeans and realized you'd peed your pants in fright.

Despite ignoring for Overwatch or coming to your apartment just for the free food, he always ended up doing small things to make up for it. You often found chocolate bars stashed in the odd drawer or cupboard to make up for all the food he steals. After he finished laughing, Jungkook allowed you to wear his sweatshirt to cover it and bought you new jeans. You still had that sweatshirt stashed in your closet somewhere.

vVv

The tears stopped by the end of dinner, but now anger ran down your spine. How dare he skip your birthday for someone he just met? He'd never done anything like this before, he was the one person in this world that you could depend on, and now he's not. You feel a pang of sadness in your stomach and reach out for your portion of the bill, which Jungkook had promised to pay for.

"Stop," Jin said, reaching for the bill you'd just barely wrapped your fingertips around. "You're not paying. We'll split yours." You nodded, powerless to the eldest's tone.

After the bill was paid, everyone got up and starting readying to leave. You had taken a taxi, expecting Jungkook to take you home afterward. Jin seemed to notice, his brown eyes melting when they met yours.

"Hey, come on, I'll walk you home."

You nodded and waved goodbye to the other guys as you all walked in opposite directions or climbed into taxis. You didn't catch the other guys thumbs upping Jin and giving him reassuring smiles.

"Thanks for coming," you said. "Even though it kinda got ruined."

"I'll always come, Y/N."

"Oh, when I get a hold of his bunny ass--"

"Go easy on him, Y/N. I'm sure he has a better reason than he told you."

"He better be on his death bed then."

Jin let out a snort, which caused you to smile, but the smile soon faded and so did the fake happiness the anger made you feel. Now you just felt hopeless and felt the tears stinging in your sinuses again.

"Do," you said, already your voice faltering. "you think I'm still enough?"

Jin stopped. "What do you mean?"

"Am I still enough for him? Maybe he found a better friend," you said, your gaze painting the sidewalk. "I mean, I always rely on him. He's always my shoulder to cry on. Maybe he finally got tired of it. Got tired of me."

Jin placed a hand on your shoulder. It felt odd, as Jin wasn't one for skinship, but his touch was comforting, even if you were imagining it was Jungkook's. Except you couldn't, Jungkook's touch was old, familiar, warm. Like the fireplace at your grandparent's house or when your car is completely heated on a snowy day. Jin's--sure, it was warm--but it wasn't Jungkook.

"No, no, of course not," Jin said, moving to hug you, your cheek hitting his chest. "That could never happen. You and Jungkook have been friends for years. If he was gonna get tired of you, he would've already."

You scoffed, half in laughter and half in fear. "Thanks."

"Okay, but seriously, Jungkook cares about you. A lot." Jin paused and sighed. You looked up, noticing his eyes weren't on you, but rather he was looking up. His eyes looked glazed, but you didn't remember him having any drinks. "He wouldn't allow himself to lose you, Y/N. Trust me."

The rest of the walk was filled with a comfortable silence. It was only a few more blocks from where you'd stopped, so you reached your apartment in just a few minutes.

"Thanks for walking with me," you said. "Sorry, I got kinda sad halfway through."

Jin shook his head and reached to move a piece of your ponytail that had escaped from the hairband and fallen roguishly over your head.

"You don't need to apologize for your feelings, Y/N. Just promise me you won't kill the kid. I'm sure this is all just a misunderstanding."

You nodded, although you weren't convinced that Jungkook didn't now hate you for reasons you didn't know.

"Thanks," you said. "For everything."

Jin nodded. "You're welcome." He turned and walked into the night and you turned your back before he disappeared.

vVv

"How did the confession go?" Jimin asked, as soon as Jin walked into the small apartment he shared with Yoongi, which was now cramped with six bodies.

"It didn't."

Jimin and the other faces in the room all contorted in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"I didn't confess."

"But, why? Wasn't that your plan? Don't you like her?"

"She loves someone else," Jin said, his voice deeper than usual, his heartbreak captured in the back of his throat. "And, someone else loves her."

vVv

Two Days Later

You hadn't heard anything from Jungkook since the night of your birthday and you weren't sure what hurt more--the fact that he didn't care enough to explain himself or that he had seemingly replaced you. His Instagram was full of stories and posts of him with the girl you assumed was the one he skipped your birthday for. She was beautiful with large dark eyes and curly hair. His arm was around her shoulders and then eventually her waist. He must really like her because you remember how it took Jungkook nearly two years just to feel comfortable placing an arm around you.

You huffed and threw your phone onto your bed as you ran your hands through your hair. You were still mad, but you didn't want to lose your best friend. You remembered Taehyung mentioning how all the guys were getting together for Overwatch.

You hardly thought as you headed towards Jin's and Yoongi's apartment--the largest of the apartments belonging to those in your friend group.

You didn't bother knocking as you entered the apartment. You found the seven guys all crowded onto two couches and watching Taehyung and Jungkook. They didn't notice you until you slipped in and placed your hand  on Jimin's shoulder—who jumped at your touch.

"Y/N!"

All seven heads turned to look at you. Most breaking into smiles and friendly greetings and offering you snacks.

"What are you doing here?" Jungkook asked, his voice breaking through the revelry. He was normally so soft-spoken, but at this moment, his voice grated through the air.

"I was hoping we could talk."

"You weren't invited here."

Your stomach turned. He'd never spoken to you like this, ever. Jungkook was normally the happiest when you showed up unannounced.

"Since when do I need an invitation, Jungkook? This is Jin and Yoongi's place, not yours."

Jungkook didn't respond but instead unpaused the game. Taehyung barely had time to close his mouth from watching the two of you that he fumbled with the controller as he realized Jungkook had restarted the game.

"Oh, so you're just gonna ignore me then?"

You rolled your eyes at how typical this was of all your ex-boyfriends. Towards the end of the relationship, they always ignored you for something else. Sometimes it was someone else, others it was their job. And yet, others, it was video games.

Jungkook had been there with you for all of these failed relationships. He said you deserved someone better, someone, who would never leave you or ignore you. You thought he was the only constant in your life, the one person who would never leave you, but now, he was just like all the rest.

Tears stung your sinuses. You dug your feet into the carpet and grabbed onto the back of the couch, trying to focus on the game. The guys had gone back to talking amongst themselves, eating, and watching the game. Yet, the air felt different, you caught concerned glances flicking your way and Jin silently offered you a slice of pizza which you declined, only eliciting another puppy-eyed look from the eldest of the group.

Jungkook was close to winning and the tears were soon beginning to simmer and your hands balled into fists. Before you could think or stop yourself, you marched around the couch and reached for the cord that was connected to the Xbox. The screen went black and all the eyes in the room shifted to you.

"Y/N?! What the fuck?!" Jungkook said, his voice rising. "I was about to win!"

"Jungkook, we need to talk and you're being an asshole."

Jungkook's ears were red and his eyes hard as steel. "This is ridiculous, Y/N. You came here uninvited to talk to me and when I go back to playing games because that's what I'm here for, you unplugged the system and demand I talk to you. And, I'm the asshole?"

You wanted to scream and pull your hair out. Yet, the thing you wanted most was to cry into Jungkook's oversized, black T-shirt because you knew it smelled of his cologne.

"Jungkook, you skipped my birthday party and you said we could talk about it, but it's been two days and I just want my best friend back."

"Y/N, why can't you just take the hint you're not wanted? This was supposed to be a guy's night and now you've had to come in here and ruin everything. You're way too clingy, like, this is why they always leave you."

"Jungkook!" Jin said.

You barely registered as the other boys chastised Jungkook as your vision blurred from the tears. You swore you saw his face soften before your eyes were totally filled with tears, but you couldn't be sure.

"Y/N," Jin said. You felt his hand come to rest gently on your shoulder. "Come on, I'll take you home."

vVv

A few days later you found yourself standing outside of Jungkook's apartment. You knew Taehyung and Jimin were staying with him, so you secretly hoped one of them would open the door.

The hallway was silent and dimly lit. It felt like midnight despite being noon. You softly knocked on the door, the sound--while quiet--seemed to echo down the hallway. You weren't sure what you were going to do or say when he opened the door. You were only sure that you missed the way he used to show up at your place at midnight with ice cream sandwiches or the way he let you borrow his sweatshirts when you were cold or couldn't sleep.

Thirty seconds passed and you knocked again. Firmer this time, each knock ringing out in the empty hallway.

"Jungkookie," you said softly.

You heard footsteps on the other side of the door. They were faint, but you recognized them from when he slept over at your apartment when you were sick or going through a rough time.

You listened as the door unlocked and slowly opened. He only opened the door a crack, just enough to peak out, as if you were an unknown person knocking on his door. As if you didn't know the layout of his apartment or that he kept all his mess concentrated to the common areas and his bedroom immaculate.

"Y/N...what are you doing here?"

His voice was softer than the last time you spoke. You knew Jin had told Jungkook how much you cried as he took you home and how you didn't answer his texts all night.

"I just wanted to see you," you said. "We don't have to talk or anything. I just miss you."

Jungkook didn't say anything. His eyes scanning over you. Your hair was unwashed and pulled into a bun and you wore sweatpants and a T-shirt. Dark circles outlined your eyes and even though it had only been a few days, your face looked thinner and your skin languid.

Another set of footsteps approached and the door swung open wider. Taehyung stood there in just his boxers and munching on a piece of toast. His eyes widened when he saw you and he glanced over at Jungkook, who's eyes were looking down at your feet.

"Hey, stop being a dick and let her in."

"Put on some clothes then," Jungkook said, his voice quiet and low, almost a growl. He swung the door all the way open and disappeared into his apartment.

Taehyung met your eyes and shrugged. He offered a small smile as you walked into the apartment. You hadn't brought anything with you, not sure exactly what would happen.

"I won't stay long," you said. "I just wanted to see him."

"At least have breakfast with me," he said, dropping two pieces of bread into the toaster.

You nodded and fell onto the couch. You'd done this countless times. At 4 in the morning after a night out, you'd collapse on Jungkook's couch still in your heels and your makeup slowly wearing off. You usually woke up the next morning in Jungkook's bed, your heels set by the door and your makeup at least mostly wiped off. At 6 pm as you leaned against Jungkook's shoulder as the movie started, your hand diving into the popcorn bowl in his lap. Most of your favorite memories happened on his couch.

"I hope you like Nutella," Tae said, handing you a piece of toast.

You laughed. "I love it," you said. "How do you stay so fit eating like this?"

Taehyung was still in his boxers. While he didn't have a six pack, he certainly wasn't hard to look at and the slight toning of his stomach showed he was putting in some effort.

"I'll gain five pounds just from eating this," you said, and despite your words, you took a large bite.

"Then you should have another," Jungkook said from the other side of the room. You hadn't noticed him there, he must've slipped in when Taehyung distracted you with the toast. "You're getting too skinny."

"I didn't ask you, Jungkook," you said. You crossed your arms over your chest and sat back, your toast abandoned on the arm of the couch.

"I'm just worried about you."

"Since when? When you stopped texting me? Or, when you ditched my birthday party for someone you just met?"

Jungkook's eyes turned soft in the way that would usually make you melt. But, you kept your eyes off of his and your spine straight.

"Y/N..."

"Listen, Jungkook, I might've come here cause I missed you, but that doesn't mean I've forgiven you."

Jungkook didn't say anything. Silence filled the apartment and after what felt like an eternity, he left to his bedroom.

"Are you okay?" Taehyung asked.

You nodded. "I think I just need a nap or something. I'm getting a headache." You looked around the apartment. There was only one bedroom and both Taehyung and Jimin were staying with Jungkook during their visit. "Where are you sleeping?"

Taehyung nodded and gestured toward the couch. "There," he said.

"Oh," you said. "Can I borrow it for an hour or so?"

"Be my guest. But, you know, even though you two are fighting and all, I bet Jungkook would let you have the bed."

You shook your head. "No," you said. "I'm not asking him for any favors and the couch looks more comfortable anyway."

Taehyung shrugged. You laid down and turned your back to him, missing the knowing smile as he cleaned up. You listened as he cleaned up and got dressed before leaving the apartment. It wasn't long before the tears came and you sobbed into the couch cushion as quietly as you could. The last thing you wanted was for Jungkook to emerge from his bedroom and find you like this.

He'd seen you cry dozens of times and you'd even held him as he sobbed into you. You didn't mind crying in front of him, but you knew it would destroy him to see you like this and to know he was the cause. Even if you mad at him, even if you were losing him, you didn't want to crush him.

You didn't remember falling asleep, but when you awoke, his scent was everywhere. You pressed your face into the pillow and stretched out your legs comfortably. You sighed until a thought crossed your mind. Pillow?

You opened your eyes and found yourself in Jungkook's bedroom. It was dark and the covers were pulled up to your chin. Jungkook wasn't in the room and from the empty feeling in the air, he wasn't in the apartment either. Your phone was next to you on the nightstand and plugged into Jungkook's charger.

You glanced at the time and realized your nap had lasted three times longer than you anticipated and you sat in bed as you realized that you probably needed to go home. However, before you could pull your eyes away from your lock screen, a text notification from a couple of hours ago caught your attention.

vVv

"Hey, sorry, I'm late," Taehyung said, walking into Jin and Yoongi's apartment where the other five boys were already crowded on the twin couches. "Y/N showed up at Jungkook's and I needed to see what happened."

The others all looked at Taehyung expectantly. "Jungkook doesn't know about this, right?"

"We didn't tell him."

Taehyung nodded. "Well, they're definitely in love with each other. Jungkook was jealous as hell and Y/N's heartbroken. I could practically see Jungkook splitting in half when he realized how upset she was."

"Well, didn't you all notice how when she started crying after he got mad at her for unplugging the Xbox, how he just broke? I don't think he cared about the game anymore, but then Jin swooped in and stopped it before he could apologize."

All eyes swiped towards Jin and he shrugged. "What? She was to the point of crying. I didn't know what he was going to do and I didn't want to upset either of them more."

"Does he know that you never confessed?"

Jin shook his head. "He never asked."

"Jin!" all the guys said at one.

"That would change everything! He probably thinks you and Y/N are together."

"It's pretty obvious we're not."

"I don't know the way you intervened during the fight and walked her home. It could be seen as you protecting her."

"Well, whatever, what's the plan? We have to get them to make up somehow. And confess, cause they're gonna drive us crazy pining after each other." Jin looked around at the other faces and all of them were, in turn, watching him.

"Well, we need to force them to be alone somehow," Namjoon said. "We could try locking them somewhere, but that's gonna be difficult cause the party is here and none of the doors lock." Eyes wandered as they tried to find a solution and eventually, Jin's eyes fell on the TV where a cartoon cop was catching a criminal, the handcuffs snapping down on the culprit's wrists.

"I think I might have an idea."

vVv

Taehyung and Jimin were taking the train back to their college town in the morning, so that meant you'd all spend the night before getting drunk and gorging yourselves on all the pizza you could.

Jin and Yoongi offered to host the party and a few of their neighbors offered up their apartments so everyone could spread out. You all invited your extended friends and neighbors if everyone came, you didn't doubt the party would probably get out of hand, but that was half the fun.

As you brushed on your blush and primped your hair for the final time, you felt butterflies in your stomach. Jungkook was going to be there. There was no way he would miss out on a good party and the opportunity for free food and drinks.

You wore a short white dress that was admittedly a little shorter than you would normally wear. But, with Jungkook ignoring you, you wanted attention and you didn't really care who it was from. Plus, you liked the way it hugged your curves and how when paired with the perfect heels, made your legs look longer.

You arrived a few minutes early to the party with the expectation of helping set up, but the party was already in full swing. When the elevator opened, people crowded the hall with cups in hand and music blasting from Jin and Yoongi's apartment. At this rate, the cops would be called in a couple hours, unless Jin and Yoongi had talked to all their neighbors beforehand, but you highly doubted it.

You waded through the bodies and found your friends all invested in a game of beer pong. The younger three on one end and the older four on the other. The older ones were currently winning and you smirked as you remembered just how good Yoongi was at the game.

"Need help?" you asked, placing your arm around Taehyung's shoulders, the heels allowing you to do so easier, although it still looked slightly awkward.

"Ah, finally! Someone who can rival Yoongi!"

You laughed, trying not to allow your eyes to wander over to Jungkook who was standing closer to you than he had for weeks. "Who's turn is it?"

"Yours if you want."

You nodded and walked up to the table. You angled your arm and aimed for one of the back cups, even if you missed, it may still land in one of the front cups that remained. You tossed the ping pong ball and it sailed perfectly into the cup.

"Yes! Drink up, Min Yoongi!"

Yoongi smirked and took the cup and downed it. You two had played this game countless time, both won and lost countless times, to the point that it was no longer about winning, but rather, who could get the other drunk quicker.

Yoongi aimed his shot and tossed it flawlessly into the cup right in front of you. You took out the ball and downed the cup. The beer was pretty much tasteless which meant it went down easily but left a bad taste in the back of your throat.

After a few shots back and forth, you had drunk twice more and Yoongi once. You were aiming up another shot, intending to tie it up when you felt a hand on your shoulder. You looked behind you and caught Jungkook's eyes.

"Are you gonna let us play?"

"Do you want to win or not?" you said, turning back and aiming up your shot. You were already a little tipsy and your head ached as you concentrated.

"Y/N, it'll be no fun to get drunk so early," he said. "Come on." His voice was soft and familiar. He'd done this dozens of times. Prevented you from getting too drunk or going home with the wrong guy. He brought you back when the alcohol began to take over. This time--however--you turned away and aimed the ball. Missing.

Yoongi tosses the ball in what appears to be a haphazard fashion, but it sinks straight into a cup. You pick it up and bring it to your lips, but before you can drink, the cup is being knocked from your hands and the beer spills almost entirely onto your dress.

You see Jungkook staring at you wide-eyed--the obvious culprit--his hand still gripping the cup.

"Jungkook!" you yelled, people turned in your direction, but your yell was soon forgotten as the music continued. All but your small group turned back to their own conversations. "Would you stop trying to be my friend? You made it quite obvious you no longer wanted our friendship and you just keep screwing everything up!"

"Y/N, I..."

Tears were beginning to fill your eyes and the only thing you wanted to do was get drunk and forget this night happened. You stepped forward to push through the crowd when someone grabbed your wrist. You knew from the touch that it wasn't Jungkook and when you glanced back, Jin's lips were upturned in a small smile.

"Wait, Y/N," he said. "I'm really sorry about this."

You cocked your head in confusion, but before your lips could form words to ask Jin what he was apologizing for you felt something click onto your wrist and found a handcuff locked around your wrist and you noticed the other was locked to another wrist. You followed the chain and met Jungkook's dark, confused eyes.

"Have fun, kids. We aren't unlocking you until you talk everything out."

vVv

Ten minutes later you stood in the kitchen as Jungkook tried to work a kitchen knife into the lock. The beer was slowly making your dress more and more see-through and you glanced around the room.

"Jungkook, can we try this somewhere else?"

He looked up at you with his brows furrowed in confusion. You hadn't managed to say anything before his eyes widened and he quickly shrugged off his flannel. It caught on his cuff and he struggled to get the sleeve over the handcuff and chain.

"Fuck it," he said, taking the knife and cutting into the seam where the sleeve met the shoulder.

"Jungkook isn't this a bit drastic? We can just go into the bathroom or something."

"No, it's okay. I can just cut off the other one later."

He brought around the uncut sleeve and brought over your shoulder and brought the cut sleeve over the chain and up your arm. The way the flannel hit it ended up covering your entire dress and draping across your bare thighs.

As soon as you were covered and comfortable again, he once again tried to unlock the handcuffs and your hand was at his mercy as he moved the knife point back and forth in the lock.

"Jungkook, this isn't going to work. You're just gonna end up hurting one of us."

Jungkook sat the knife back on the counter looked down dejectedly at your cuffed wrists. You couldn't help the pang of hurt in your stomach. Jin had handcuffed the two of you so you would talk and all Jungkook could focus was on how to get the handcuffs off without talking.

"Maybe we can break the chain," he said. "If we both pull, our combined strength might be enough."

Your wrist was already starting to become red and raw because Jin had accidentally snapped the cuff on a little tight, but before you could protest, Jungkook began pulling on the chain.

You immediately yelped in pain and your wrist attempted to escape the pain, causing your body to fold in on itself. You found yourself crouched and leaning against the counter, your arm almost straight above your head to remain close enough to Jungkook's so that it didn't dislocate the joint.

"Y/N?" Your name was barely audible over the music and the people around you many of which shot odd glances or coy smiles your way.

"It's tight, Jungkook. Jin accidentally locked it too tight. Can--can we just go talk and get these things off?"

Jungkook nodded, seeing your teary eyes from the pain and helping you to your feet. His free palm came to rest on your shoulder and his handcuffed hand grasped your wrist and he slipped two of his fingers between your skin and the cuff. It was the first time he'd touched you since before your birthday and you felt your knees go weak and something shifted in you with his touch. The plate tectonics of your heart shifting suddenly and with no warning.

"Let's go to the bathroom, first."

You were confused as he pulled you into the bathroom and situated you against the counter. He reached into the cupboard behind you and pulled out some lotion and squirted it onto his handcuffed hand. He rubbed it softly onto your wrist where the handcuff had rubbed the skin red and raw.

"Better?"

You nodded and looked up at his face which hovered not far above yours but was focused down on your wrist. His jaw was clenched and his features were stiff. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out the sleeve he'd cut from his flannel.

"I think if we roll this down we can put it between the cuff and your wrist. It might make it feel tight, but it won't hurt you so much."

He rolled the sleeve down under it was a single cuff which he carefully slipped over your hand and under the cuff. It did work, your skin feeling relieved from the lotion and the cloth, although it did still feel slightly too tight.

"Thanks," you said. "But, maybe we should get out of here. I don't want your girlfriend to get the wrong idea."

Jungkook met your eyes. "What? Girlfriend?"

"The girl you went on the date with?"

"Oh, it uh, didn't work out."

"Oh, I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

There was a long pause as Jungkook continued to adjust the cuff to ensure it stayed. His eyes were focused on your wrist.

"I'm sorry," he said. "For saying you were clingy and bringing your exes into this. I'm sorry for everything."

You looked down at him, your free hand coming to play with the hairs that grew around his ears. His hair was longer than you'd ever seen it and you smiled as he seemed to lean into your hand.

Jungkook finished adjusting the cuff and looked up at you. "I think Yoongi's room is empty. He didn't want people in there, but I bet he won't mind if it's us."

You nodded and followed closely behind Jungkook as you walked through the crowd to Yoongi's bedroom. It--like Jungkook had said--was empty. The two of you flopped down on the bed and despite laying a foot apart your fingers continued to brush against each other as you adjusted your wrists in the cuffs.

"I can't figure out why Jin handcuffed us," Jungkook said. The music was just a series of thumps now and even though it was still loud, you could no longer make out the lyrics and could hear Jungkook's voice without him having to raise it. "I thought he wouldn't want us to hang out anymore."

"What?" you asked. "Why would Jin care if we hang out?"

Jungkook turned and looked at you. His hair was wet from sweat and his hair curled in thick tendrils over his forehead. "Aren't you and Jin dating?"

"What? No! Jin and I are just friends. What makes you think that?"

"Jin told me he was gonna confess to you at your party."

Jungkook pulled his gaze from you and focused up at the ceiling. You thought back on that night. Jin had been acting more generous and gentlemanly that night, but you just chalked it up to it being your birthday.

"I didn't even know he liked me. Is that why you've been avoiding me? You thought I was with Jin and you didn't want to interfere?"

"That's part of it."

"What's the other part of it?"

His eyes came back to yours and you felt his fingers brushing against yours. But, it wasn't just the millisecond brushes as he adjusted. No, his fingers were practically intertwined with yours.

"Y/N, we've been friends so long...I don't want to ruin it..."

"Jungkook, it's already ruined."

There was a long tense silence between the of you. His fingers fully intertwined with yours. It was far from the first time you'd held his hand, but it felt different. It was softer, yet more intense at the same time. As if your hand were porcelain that could break at even the slightest touch.

Jungkook moved so quickly that you have no idea how he came to hover above you. His free arm resting above his head and the one handcuffed to you still intertwined with yours to the side. "What would've happened if Jin had confessed to you?"

"Kookie?"

"What would've happened?"

"I-I would've turned him down."

"Why?"

"Cause I'm in love with someone else."

His lips were on your before you even finished the sentence. He was gentle but urgent as if he'd been waiting two thousand years to kiss you.

"I'm still mad at you for skipping my birthday party," you said when he pulled away. "I don't care if you're in love with me, your cute ass still has a lot of making up to do."

Jungkook smiled as he leaned down placed a small kiss on your neck. "Well, I never got to give you my gift."

He reached into his back pocket and pulled out two tickets. You grabbed them from his hands and you smiled as you realized it was for the musical you'd been dying to see.

"It's tomorrow," he said. "Pretty good first date, yeah?"

"Hey, don't get cocky yet!" It was hard for you to hide your smile and you didn't want to give him the satisfaction, so, you just leaned up and kissed him.

vVv

You woke up the next morning enveloped in Jungkook's arms and his one-armed flannel. You looked up to see him scrolled through his phone, but when you squirmed, he looked down at you.

"Good morning, baby," he said.

"That sounds so weird."

"What, baby?" He smirked and giggled as you reached up and playfully hit his shoulder.

"Wait," you said, looking at your unbound wrist. You looked down and found the handcuffs on the bed. "They must've uncuffed us last night."

"I hadn't even realized," he said. A blush appeared on his face. "I didn't want to let go of your hand."

"Aww," you said, reaching up and ruffling his hair. "You're such a softie."

Jungkook smirked and grabbed your wrists. "Hey, I'm not completely a softie."

He held your wrists and glanced down at the handcuffs. "Maybe, we should keep these."

[fbfh]

nico di angelo relationship and intimacy headcanons

As with all steamy/nsfw works, the characters are aged up to 18+/college era

so

let’s get started ‘,:)

(1.1k words ooooh boy get ready)

Clingy cat boyf

If he’s dating you he already feels really close and comfortable around you

Do not be surprised if he gets really physically affectionate really fast

I’m talking jump your bones after a week of being official

Pun intended

He loves when you kiss his neck

Blushes so easily

Tends to mutter things in italian when he gets overwhelmed 

Which is often

but that doesn’t stop him

Believe me

Okay he’s an old fashioned fella

He still has a lot of internalized dating and courting etiquette rules from the 30’s 

and you’d think it makes him wanna take it slow

But nah son

During the 30’s no one had any goddamn time for taking it slow

Don’t worry about that 

It was also common for soldiers to get gifts like gum, candy, flowers, chocolate, and nylon stockings for girls they liked

Nico subconsciously falls back on this a lot

You end up with a small collection of fuzzy socks

You don’t automatically get the connection, but when you realize how important nylon stockings were in the 30’s because of the shortage, and that he was getting the present day equivalent of that for you

You appreciate your little collection of socks even more

All that being said we can come to two conclusions

His love language (amplified by the whole son of the God of wealth and death thing) is gifts, physical contact, and quality time

Especially with how much mortal danger he and the gang have been in the past few years, he does not want to waste any time, especially if he really likes you

Which he probably does 

Really really likes it when you take off his clothes 

Especially his shirt

That’s up there among his favorite parts

Absolutely an any time any place kinda guy 

Thinks of it exclusively as making love

Finds any new slang or euphemisms hilarious 

You call it banging once and he laughed for like 20 minutes

“So, are we banging or what?”

“Nico?”

“Nico why are you laughing?”

He has a lot of trauma obviously

His problems aren’t magically instantly fixed by you but he’s noticed how drastically your presence helps him feel better 

Can barely sleep if you’re not there

Like he has some of your cologne/perfume on him in case you get separated and can’t sleep next to him

If he does have nightmares 

Which thank gods are getting fewer and further between

A little light making out and netflix can usually solve the problem

Or like

Riding him

That usually works too

The faces he makes are,,,,,,

Very nice,,,,

he’s also very vocal

You one time deleted a happy birthday voice mail from a childhood friend to make room on your phone for an audio recording he sent you

And like be real

If your friend had heard it they would have deleted their message themselves

It takes him a while to get the hang of technology 

As soon as he does

He sends you a voice text

You’re like aww 

So you listen to it 

“Hello, cuore mio…”

Oh shit

Your face got very red

You were really lucky you were alone

Every time you see audio messages from him you know not to listen to them without headphones 

You also try not to listen to them until you’re on your way to somewhere you can be alone with him

There have been a lot of “meet me in the janitor’s closet” texts between the two of you

aLsO play with his hair

You did it once cause some hair fell in his face 

He moaned

“… will you do that again?”

The answer is yes

Yes you will

Write him love letters and his heart will explode

Everything from “thoughts of you get me through the day” to “truly astonished by how much I want you to rail me”

All are super effective 

He absolutely 100% has a locket with a picture of you

He just gazes at it sometimes when he needs a little extra hit of serotonin 

Okay okay we all know a certain Mr. Jackson who is king of surprising you in the shower

Nico is a close second

Honestly you and him probably break the intimacy ice first of any couples in the demisquad

Stamina for dayyyys

Never gets tired???????

Even you find yourself laughing “are you actually hard again?” Way more than you’d expect to

Also expect a lot of…. Private photos and Polaroids

You never would have expected to have a shoebox buried in your closet full of pictures and love letters that are very much not suited for general audiences

Much less three or four

K i n g  of quickies

“Any time, any place” -Nico Di Angelo probably

Likes buying you underwear and lingerie 

A whole lot

He’ll sometimes surprise you with a bunch of shopping bags 

You look through them equally excited every time

You do a little fashion show of all the stuff he got you

You usually don’t make it past three things before they’re on the floor

His kisses are so gentle and tender

They have all the soft fierce passion of Shakespeare plays and jazz vinyls

At one point pretty early on you started to feel bad that he was spending so much money on you 

“Don’t worry, vita Mia, it’s a non issue." 

After you’re done shopping he pulls out a black credit card with gold accents from a bank you don’t recognize

It says "bank of afthonos”, and in a fancy, minimalistic script below, “palladium select”

He sees you looking at the card and a smile plays at the corner of his lips

“Birthday gift from dad,” he answers without you having to ask

Ah

You can tell the cashier wants to roll her eyes, but he always makes a point to tip very generously

He hands her a few big bills and the irritation falls her face 

he holds you close as you leave the store, still a little surprised by everything that had happened in the past five minutes

“Anything else you want?”

You think back to when you two first got together

“I’ve had everything I want for a while now,” you tell him, giving his hand a squeeze

He smiles and presses a kiss to your cheek 

He pulls you into a small family bathroom and locks the door, pulling you close and kissing your neck

“I think we can be a little late to our lunch reservation…”

[sapphire374]

Soy Sol: Chapter 11 (The Cut that Burrows Deep)

Wattpad Link

Ch.1 / Ch.2 / Ch.3 / Ch.4 / Ch.5 / Ch.6 / Ch.7 / Ch.8 / Ch.9 / Ch. 10 / Ch.12 / Ch.13 / Ch.14 / Ch.15 / Ch.16 / Ch.17

Ámbar feels like every step she takes, the more she can feel her heartbeat. It’s like she’s carrying it in her arms with nothing to guard it, out in the open alone. She opens the cold rusted handle of the entrance to the restaurant. There she is, her biological mom trembling while drinking a glass of water. Ámbar sums up all the courage inside her and takes the chance to approach her. When she grabs the seat in front of her, Sylvania can’t help but stare in shock. “Wow Ámbar, you truly have grown.” Ámbar may have brought all her walls down for the people she loves, but she puts them back up with this stranger.

“You can’t say that since you were never there for me. That’s no fair,” Ámbar chided. Sylvania chokes up and avoids eye contact. “Look Ámbar, I now know after everything that has happened the big mistake I made, but at the time it felt like the best option for you. I was young and didn’t have the means nor felt ready to take care of a child. I thought Sharon would’ve been a better parental figure instead of a young girl like myself. I later on regretted it and that’s something I shall have to carry with me for the rest of my life.”

Ámbar grips onto her purse trying very hard to hold back all her tears. She wonders why did this lady chose Sharon specifically and why did Sharon try to keep it a secret for so long? “I understand you were young, but I know that’s not the whole story because I have memories being in a different house that was NOT Benson Mansion. You saw me, you knew me, and didn’t like me enough to keep me,” Ámbar rebuked. Sylvania is showing tears now, she’s choking up with every word as her hand trembles just to take a sip of water. “It wasn’t like that at all Ámbar. I tried, I really did try to see if I was capable of taking care of a child. I noticed my arms weren’t so comforting for you. Sometimes when you love someone, so much, you have to let them go because you care,” Sylvania responded. Ámbar doesn’t know whether to believe what she’s saying or not. She wishes she can get out of these tornadoes of lies that always come chasing her. She’s sick of it all. She wants the truth. Is that too much to ask for?

Silence crowds the room, they’re breathing the same air but can’t even look at each other. Sylvania speaks up again. “I know this feels hard to believe but why do you think I came back? It was for that reason, I thought Sharon would be a better parent than me and would take great care of you. I realized I was sadly wrong.”

“Sharon? Of all people? What made you think that a woman who put a place on fire because she was jealous of her own sister would be a perfect parent for a child? Do you know she never showed me affection or love? I had to learn it all on my own. She only showed any signs of care when she needed me part of her plan that only benefitted her. You left me to a person who only cares about themselves,” Ámbar fumed.

“It wasn’t like that at all. I had no idea about her being the cause of the Benson fire and she had already adopted you before that even happened. When I met her, she was a kind woman, I was friends with Lili from work, so I had already knew the family. I assumed that Sharon had a good heart just like Lili, even though she was seemingly different. The whole time I would interact with her, she was always nice and seemed to really want a child because she always felt alone. It all just felt fitting.” Ámbar is trying to put together all the puzzle pieces in her head with Sylvania’s story. Part of her doesn’t believe it but…. It does kind of make sense. For her it justifies nothing even though she has hope.

Before she gets up from her seat, she leaves a wad of cash. “Ámbar where are you going? We haven’t even ordered yet?” Sylvania asks. “I’m not feeling hungry anymore, here’s some money for dinner.” Ámbar heads out the door with no remnants behind other than the tears that fall to the floor.

Jam and Roller

“Eyyy amigo I’m so happy for the release of your new music video!” Gastón exclaims to Matteo. They’re both drinking smoothies while watching the Youtube countdown from Matteo’s phone. These are the special moments Matteo loves to share with Gastón since he’s always been his pal for the longest. He also loves sharing it with Luna too, but they sadly haven’t hit it off as well for a while. Matteo is hoping Gastón’s plan will work for the upcoming days.

Simón heads to their tables with a fresh batch of popcorn. “Wow, how exciting! It’s even more special since you get to enjoy it here at the Jam and Roller with us!” Simón states. Matteo grins but it slowly fades when he sees Luna walk into the cafeteria and completely ignoring him. “What happened?” Simón asks when he sees Matteo’s vivid expression abruptly change. “No nothing, I just wish I got to share this moment with another person too.” When Simón turns his head and sees who Matteo is staring at, he realizes what Matteo meant.

Nina pulls out her purse and hands her phone to Luna. “I know you’re trying to pretend you don’t care but you do. Watch the video, it’ll get rid of all your curiosities.” Luna shakes her head in disapproval. “Nina, the least I want to do is watch a music video of the one I love flirting with a girl who has a huge crush on him as well. They’re practically soulmates, meant for each other,” Luna exaggerates. “Oh c’mon, I know it’s complicated, but you know that’s not true. If you’re not going to do it for him, then do it for yourself. You deserve to see why he arrived late to your date.” Luna glares at Nina and decides to take the phone.

Once the music video is out, everyone begins to cheer for Matteo. Luna sits even more depressed seeing at the ‘amazing’ chemistry Matteo and Viviana had in the music video. She can’t help but doubt herself even more when all the comments from his fans say they ship him with Viviana. “Nina, I’m not feeling so good. I think I’ll just head home.” Nina nods and Luna begins to get up from her chair and head out. Matteo notices and follows her out.

“Luna! Luna, wait up! I need to tell you something,” Matteo yells out. “Matteo not now, I’m not in the mood. Congratulations of your video, it was very nice. I just don’t feel so good okay.” Matteo catches up to her and stands in front. “Look Luna, I don’t know if you’ll listen to me now but please go to tomorrow’s concert I’m having. My manager is having me make a concert to promote the single, but it wouldn’t be the same without you. Please Luna. You never miss any of my concerts,” Matteo begs. Luna gradually smiles. “Really? You still want me there?”

“Of course, I do Luna.” Luna now can’t help but blush. “Matteo, of course I’ll go. Even though I’m still a little upset at you calling me jealous, standing me up on our date, and not believing or listening to me, I still care. Since you want me there, I’ll be there.” Matteo is surprised by Luna’s comment and begins to graciously smile too. It was a moment for them, they hadn’t had one like this in a long time. It felt needed.

Nico is in the rink sitting on one of the chairs, he seems to be working on something since he has his notebook open with his pen. Jim enters and sees him alone. “Hey there, what are you working on?” Jim asks. “Oh just a few verses, I’m trying to get ahead on the Roller Band song for the competition, but nothing seems to come into mind,” Nico says. Jim heads to the seat beside him. She sits down and carefully glances over his blank page. “Oh yeah you do seem to be having some trouble,” Jim chuckles. “If you’d like I can help, I’m use to writing songs with Yam.” Nico turns and faces Jim, “Yes of course. I need all the help I can get; it’s been a while for me since I got to write a song with the Roller Band.” They both laugh together and get working on the song.

Jazmín dashes to Delfi holding a small slip of paper. “You won’t believe what just happened?” Delfi carefully places her books into her locker after seeing Jazmín rush to her. “Is it something new for the Fundom or for your blog, Ja Jazmin?” Delfi predicts. “Nope, you’re very far off. Look at this,” Jazmín hands Delfi the note. The more she reads it, the more her eyes grow like a flower blooming in the season, keeps opening. She’s in plain shock as Jazmín nods from her amusement. “Right! I have a secret admirer!! I have to post about this on my blog!” Jazmín frantically grabs her phone from her pocket but right when she’s about to film, Delfi stops her. “No Jazmín, this is something special. Honestly, I think this is something you should keep for yourself, every celebrity likes to keep their personal life separate from their work life,” Delfi advises. Jazmín thinks for a second and says, “Nahhh I’ll still post it, plus this can even help us discover who the anonymous writer is!”

The Restaurant

Yam is wearing her golden shimmery dress that Jim helped her pick out. She’s very anxious about her date with Ramiro, she wants it to go out perfect since this was something she had been dreaming of for a while. He puts down the menu and slips his hand under hers to her surprise. He gives her a shy smile. “I had been dreaming of this for a while. Before, I would always try to move on, but I just couldn’t. My mind just couldn’t forget about you,” Ramiro admits. Yam begins to tear up. “I felt the same way for so long but never said anything worried you didn’t feel the same way. I’m so happy about this moment. I don’t care how long I had to wait, it was totally worth it.”

Throughout the whole night, Yam and Ramiro shared college stories and even old memories of each other. How Yam never stopped writing songs about him and how Ramiro would skate imagining about her. Everything went smooth till dessert came. A random man with a suit and tie approached their table and faces Yam. “You look familiar, are you Yamila Sanchez from that Ja Jazmin blog?” Yam stays startled and stutters, “uhhh yes why?” The man quickly pulls a card out of his pocket. “Hillside Records, I’m the owner. I would like to set up a meeting with you for a chance at a record deal.” Yam immediately glares at Ramiro for a response. He shows his approval and gestures for Yam to respond. “Yes I would love to!” Yam exclaims. “Great! I’m available tomorrow at 5 pm. There is one important detail I have to tell you,” the man says. “Yes, what is it,” Yam asks. “The record company is not in Buenos Aires. It’s in California.” He proceeds to hand her the card. “Think about it, I’ll see you tomorrow.” He leaves and Yam shows her disappointment to Ramiro, she couldn’t believe how such an exciting offer can turn to something so depressing. If she took this offer, that means she would have to leave her family, her friends, and her chance at being with Ramiro.

“Look I know this is hard to think about but just follow your heart. If this is something you truly want go for it, I can wait longer,” Ramiro grabs her hand and holds it. “I don’t know what to say. I never knew me pursuing a music career would mean I have to leave everything and everyone I love,” Yam gradually lets her tears fall onto her glittery dress.