#i think that's the ideal method of using the internet. the rest of us need to take goddamn notes

[bombusbombus]

The scariest thing that could happen with a booster gold show is that in the future I could run a web search and none of my top results would be an extremely detailed and well-cited breakdown of something or other from boosterrific.com

[tameblog]

Today, I’m sharing what is (in my personal-turned-professional opinion) the absolute worst decluttering strategy ever. For me. Don’t separate those two things. The thing about it being the absolute worst, and the part about it being the worst for me. I finally started making real, lasting, bigtime decluttering progress when I stopped crying about how “methods” didn’t work for me, and decluttered anyway. Imperfectly. As I decluttered, I figured out the best way for me to declutter. As I made mistakes, I learned how to avoid them. But this post is about what I have found to be the absolute worst decluttering strategy for me. And just so you know, in case you landed here as a newbie, this strategy has turned out to be the worst ever for a whole lot of other people whom I have encountered here on the internet. Are you ready? The absolute worst decluttering strategy ever (for me) is pulling everything out of a space as the first step of decluttering. Or as any step of decluttering. And yet, this is the step I always heard was the most obvious one. I still hear it. Things like, “Y’know, pulling everything out is just what you have to do.” Or “Well, everyone knows you have to pull everything out to be able to declutter.” Or (and this is the most common): “Unfortunately, things have to get worse before they can get better.” I say nope. Nopity nope nope nope. The above statements simply aren’t true. And I’ve proven this in my own home. Again and again and again. I’ve taught you how to declutter without making a bigger mess. I have shared my strategies for making visible progress (and only progress) in any amount of time. I’ve written books about all of that. But for this post, let me just explain why the “pull it all out” method doesn’t work. I’ve had the “opportunity” to experience and observe and consider this problem over the past few months while we had work done on our house. We had our popcorn ceilings professionally scraped, walls painted, and floors replaced. If we only needed to paint, we could have simply moved things around within the room, but new floors meant every single thing had to leave the room. All at once. I was forced to pull everything out. And as I tried to take advantage of the decluttering benefits of this situation, I confirmed that it isn’t good as a decluttering strategy for me. Oh, there are advantages for sure. We totally benefited from seeing the open spaces and evaluating whether certain things needed to go back in at all. But the problem happens when reality happens. And I have to let reality win over the ideal way of doing something. In decluttering reality, exhaustion hits. Moving furniture is physically exhausting. Moving every item out of one room into another room and then maneuvering in the double-stuffed room is ultra-exhausting. All that is obvious. No one is going to argue about the special-kind-of-tired caused by moving furniture. But even when I was well-rested . . . I immediately felt exhausted again when I saw the sheer chaos of the space where I’d stuck everything I’d pulled out. Thinking about all the decisions to be made drained my energy. This is the same thing that happened when I used to pull everything of a space I was decluttering.  I glanced at the empty closet and felt happy. Then, as I took a step back, I tripped over the pile of stuff I had just removed and scowled as I looked down at the mess. The mess, now outside the space where it was formerly shoved and hidden, was completely overwhelming. I felt my heart drop and all my energy drain out through my big toe. I felt exhausted, even if the heaviest thing I removed from that closet was a bag full of feathers. (

[ramestoryworld]

Today, I’m sharing what is (in my personal-turned-professional opinion) the absolute worst decluttering strategy ever. For me. Don’t separate those two things. The thing about it being the absolute worst, and the part about it being the worst for me. I finally started making real, lasting, bigtime decluttering progress when I stopped crying about how “methods” didn’t work for me, and decluttered anyway. Imperfectly. As I decluttered, I figured out the best way for me to declutter. As I made mistakes, I learned how to avoid them. But this post is about what I have found to be the absolute worst decluttering strategy for me. And just so you know, in case you landed here as a newbie, this strategy has turned out to be the worst ever for a whole lot of other people whom I have encountered here on the internet. Are you ready? The absolute worst decluttering strategy ever (for me) is pulling everything out of a space as the first step of decluttering. Or as any step of decluttering. And yet, this is the step I always heard was the most obvious one. I still hear it. Things like, “Y’know, pulling everything out is just what you have to do.” Or “Well, everyone knows you have to pull everything out to be able to declutter.” Or (and this is the most common): “Unfortunately, things have to get worse before they can get better.” I say nope. Nopity nope nope nope. The above statements simply aren’t true. And I’ve proven this in my own home. Again and again and again. I’ve taught you how to declutter without making a bigger mess. I have shared my strategies for making visible progress (and only progress) in any amount of time. I’ve written books about all of that. But for this post, let me just explain why the “pull it all out” method doesn’t work. I’ve had the “opportunity” to experience and observe and consider this problem over the past few months while we had work done on our house. We had our popcorn ceilings professionally scraped, walls painted, and floors replaced. If we only needed to paint, we could have simply moved things around within the room, but new floors meant every single thing had to leave the room. All at once. I was forced to pull everything out. And as I tried to take advantage of the decluttering benefits of this situation, I confirmed that it isn’t good as a decluttering strategy for me. Oh, there are advantages for sure. We totally benefited from seeing the open spaces and evaluating whether certain things needed to go back in at all. But the problem happens when reality happens. And I have to let reality win over the ideal way of doing something. In decluttering reality, exhaustion hits. Moving furniture is physically exhausting. Moving every item out of one room into another room and then maneuvering in the double-stuffed room is ultra-exhausting. All that is obvious. No one is going to argue about the special-kind-of-tired caused by moving furniture. But even when I was well-rested . . . I immediately felt exhausted again when I saw the sheer chaos of the space where I’d stuck everything I’d pulled out. Thinking about all the decisions to be made drained my energy. This is the same thing that happened when I used to pull everything of a space I was decluttering.  I glanced at the empty closet and felt happy. Then, as I took a step back, I tripped over the pile of stuff I had just removed and scowled as I looked down at the mess. The mess, now outside the space where it was formerly shoved and hidden, was completely overwhelming. I felt my heart drop and all my energy drain out through my big toe. I felt exhausted, even if the heaviest thing I removed from that closet was a bag full of feathers. (

[alexha2210]

Today, I’m sharing what is (in my personal-turned-professional opinion) the absolute worst decluttering strategy ever. For me. Don’t separate those two things. The thing about it being the absolute worst, and the part about it being the worst for me. I finally started making real, lasting, bigtime decluttering progress when I stopped crying about how “methods” didn’t work for me, and decluttered anyway. Imperfectly. As I decluttered, I figured out the best way for me to declutter. As I made mistakes, I learned how to avoid them. But this post is about what I have found to be the absolute worst decluttering strategy for me. And just so you know, in case you landed here as a newbie, this strategy has turned out to be the worst ever for a whole lot of other people whom I have encountered here on the internet. Are you ready? The absolute worst decluttering strategy ever (for me) is pulling everything out of a space as the first step of decluttering. Or as any step of decluttering. And yet, this is the step I always heard was the most obvious one. I still hear it. Things like, “Y’know, pulling everything out is just what you have to do.” Or “Well, everyone knows you have to pull everything out to be able to declutter.” Or (and this is the most common): “Unfortunately, things have to get worse before they can get better.” I say nope. Nopity nope nope nope. The above statements simply aren’t true. And I’ve proven this in my own home. Again and again and again. I’ve taught you how to declutter without making a bigger mess. I have shared my strategies for making visible progress (and only progress) in any amount of time. I’ve written books about all of that. But for this post, let me just explain why the “pull it all out” method doesn’t work. I’ve had the “opportunity” to experience and observe and consider this problem over the past few months while we had work done on our house. We had our popcorn ceilings professionally scraped, walls painted, and floors replaced. If we only needed to paint, we could have simply moved things around within the room, but new floors meant every single thing had to leave the room. All at once. I was forced to pull everything out. And as I tried to take advantage of the decluttering benefits of this situation, I confirmed that it isn’t good as a decluttering strategy for me. Oh, there are advantages for sure. We totally benefited from seeing the open spaces and evaluating whether certain things needed to go back in at all. But the problem happens when reality happens. And I have to let reality win over the ideal way of doing something. In decluttering reality, exhaustion hits. Moving furniture is physically exhausting. Moving every item out of one room into another room and then maneuvering in the double-stuffed room is ultra-exhausting. All that is obvious. No one is going to argue about the special-kind-of-tired caused by moving furniture. But even when I was well-rested . . . I immediately felt exhausted again when I saw the sheer chaos of the space where I’d stuck everything I’d pulled out. Thinking about all the decisions to be made drained my energy. This is the same thing that happened when I used to pull everything of a space I was decluttering.  I glanced at the empty closet and felt happy. Then, as I took a step back, I tripped over the pile of stuff I had just removed and scowled as I looked down at the mess. The mess, now outside the space where it was formerly shoved and hidden, was completely overwhelming. I felt my heart drop and all my energy drain out through my big toe. I felt exhausted, even if the heaviest thing I removed from that closet was a bag full of feathers. (

[angusstory]

Today, I’m sharing what is (in my personal-turned-professional opinion) the absolute worst decluttering strategy ever. For me. Don’t separate those two things. The thing about it being the absolute worst, and the part about it being the worst for me. I finally started making real, lasting, bigtime decluttering progress when I stopped crying about how “methods” didn’t work for me, and decluttered anyway. Imperfectly. As I decluttered, I figured out the best way for me to declutter. As I made mistakes, I learned how to avoid them. But this post is about what I have found to be the absolute worst decluttering strategy for me. And just so you know, in case you landed here as a newbie, this strategy has turned out to be the worst ever for a whole lot of other people whom I have encountered here on the internet. Are you ready? The absolute worst decluttering strategy ever (for me) is pulling everything out of a space as the first step of decluttering. Or as any step of decluttering. And yet, this is the step I always heard was the most obvious one. I still hear it. Things like, “Y’know, pulling everything out is just what you have to do.” Or “Well, everyone knows you have to pull everything out to be able to declutter.” Or (and this is the most common): “Unfortunately, things have to get worse before they can get better.” I say nope. Nopity nope nope nope. The above statements simply aren’t true. And I’ve proven this in my own home. Again and again and again. I’ve taught you how to declutter without making a bigger mess. I have shared my strategies for making visible progress (and only progress) in any amount of time. I’ve written books about all of that. But for this post, let me just explain why the “pull it all out” method doesn’t work. I’ve had the “opportunity” to experience and observe and consider this problem over the past few months while we had work done on our house. We had our popcorn ceilings professionally scraped, walls painted, and floors replaced. If we only needed to paint, we could have simply moved things around within the room, but new floors meant every single thing had to leave the room. All at once. I was forced to pull everything out. And as I tried to take advantage of the decluttering benefits of this situation, I confirmed that it isn’t good as a decluttering strategy for me. Oh, there are advantages for sure. We totally benefited from seeing the open spaces and evaluating whether certain things needed to go back in at all. But the problem happens when reality happens. And I have to let reality win over the ideal way of doing something. In decluttering reality, exhaustion hits. Moving furniture is physically exhausting. Moving every item out of one room into another room and then maneuvering in the double-stuffed room is ultra-exhausting. All that is obvious. No one is going to argue about the special-kind-of-tired caused by moving furniture. But even when I was well-rested . . . I immediately felt exhausted again when I saw the sheer chaos of the space where I’d stuck everything I’d pulled out. Thinking about all the decisions to be made drained my energy. This is the same thing that happened when I used to pull everything of a space I was decluttering.  I glanced at the empty closet and felt happy. Then, as I took a step back, I tripped over the pile of stuff I had just removed and scowled as I looked down at the mess. The mess, now outside the space where it was formerly shoved and hidden, was completely overwhelming. I felt my heart drop and all my energy drain out through my big toe. I felt exhausted, even if the heaviest thing I removed from that closet was a bag full of feathers. (

[tumibaba]

Today, I’m sharing what is (in my personal-turned-professional opinion) the absolute worst decluttering strategy ever. For me. Don’t separate those two things. The thing about it being the absolute worst, and the part about it being the worst for me. I finally started making real, lasting, bigtime decluttering progress when I stopped crying about how “methods” didn’t work for me, and decluttered anyway. Imperfectly. As I decluttered, I figured out the best way for me to declutter. As I made mistakes, I learned how to avoid them. But this post is about what I have found to be the absolute worst decluttering strategy for me. And just so you know, in case you landed here as a newbie, this strategy has turned out to be the worst ever for a whole lot of other people whom I have encountered here on the internet. Are you ready? The absolute worst decluttering strategy ever (for me) is pulling everything out of a space as the first step of decluttering. Or as any step of decluttering. And yet, this is the step I always heard was the most obvious one. I still hear it. Things like, “Y’know, pulling everything out is just what you have to do.” Or “Well, everyone knows you have to pull everything out to be able to declutter.” Or (and this is the most common): “Unfortunately, things have to get worse before they can get better.” I say nope. Nopity nope nope nope. The above statements simply aren’t true. And I’ve proven this in my own home. Again and again and again. I’ve taught you how to declutter without making a bigger mess. I have shared my strategies for making visible progress (and only progress) in any amount of time. I’ve written books about all of that. But for this post, let me just explain why the “pull it all out” method doesn’t work. I’ve had the “opportunity” to experience and observe and consider this problem over the past few months while we had work done on our house. We had our popcorn ceilings professionally scraped, walls painted, and floors replaced. If we only needed to paint, we could have simply moved things around within the room, but new floors meant every single thing had to leave the room. All at once. I was forced to pull everything out. And as I tried to take advantage of the decluttering benefits of this situation, I confirmed that it isn’t good as a decluttering strategy for me. Oh, there are advantages for sure. We totally benefited from seeing the open spaces and evaluating whether certain things needed to go back in at all. But the problem happens when reality happens. And I have to let reality win over the ideal way of doing something. In decluttering reality, exhaustion hits. Moving furniture is physically exhausting. Moving every item out of one room into another room and then maneuvering in the double-stuffed room is ultra-exhausting. All that is obvious. No one is going to argue about the special-kind-of-tired caused by moving furniture. But even when I was well-rested . . . I immediately felt exhausted again when I saw the sheer chaos of the space where I’d stuck everything I’d pulled out. Thinking about all the decisions to be made drained my energy. This is the same thing that happened when I used to pull everything of a space I was decluttering.  I glanced at the empty closet and felt happy. Then, as I took a step back, I tripped over the pile of stuff I had just removed and scowled as I looked down at the mess. The mess, now outside the space where it was formerly shoved and hidden, was completely overwhelming. I felt my heart drop and all my energy drain out through my big toe. I felt exhausted, even if the heaviest thing I removed from that closet was a bag full of feathers. (

[romaleen]

Today, I’m sharing what is (in my personal-turned-professional opinion) the absolute worst decluttering strategy ever. For me. Don’t separate those two things. The thing about it being the absolute worst, and the part about it being the worst for me. I finally started making real, lasting, bigtime decluttering progress when I stopped crying about how “methods” didn’t work for me, and decluttered anyway. Imperfectly. As I decluttered, I figured out the best way for me to declutter. As I made mistakes, I learned how to avoid them. But this post is about what I have found to be the absolute worst decluttering strategy for me. And just so you know, in case you landed here as a newbie, this strategy has turned out to be the worst ever for a whole lot of other people whom I have encountered here on the internet. Are you ready? The absolute worst decluttering strategy ever (for me) is pulling everything out of a space as the first step of decluttering. Or as any step of decluttering. And yet, this is the step I always heard was the most obvious one. I still hear it. Things like, “Y’know, pulling everything out is just what you have to do.” Or “Well, everyone knows you have to pull everything out to be able to declutter.” Or (and this is the most common): “Unfortunately, things have to get worse before they can get better.” I say nope. Nopity nope nope nope. The above statements simply aren’t true. And I’ve proven this in my own home. Again and again and again. I’ve taught you how to declutter without making a bigger mess. I have shared my strategies for making visible progress (and only progress) in any amount of time. I’ve written books about all of that. But for this post, let me just explain why the “pull it all out” method doesn’t work. I’ve had the “opportunity” to experience and observe and consider this problem over the past few months while we had work done on our house. We had our popcorn ceilings professionally scraped, walls painted, and floors replaced. If we only needed to paint, we could have simply moved things around within the room, but new floors meant every single thing had to leave the room. All at once. I was forced to pull everything out. And as I tried to take advantage of the decluttering benefits of this situation, I confirmed that it isn’t good as a decluttering strategy for me. Oh, there are advantages for sure. We totally benefited from seeing the open spaces and evaluating whether certain things needed to go back in at all. But the problem happens when reality happens. And I have to let reality win over the ideal way of doing something. In decluttering reality, exhaustion hits. Moving furniture is physically exhausting. Moving every item out of one room into another room and then maneuvering in the double-stuffed room is ultra-exhausting. All that is obvious. No one is going to argue about the special-kind-of-tired caused by moving furniture. But even when I was well-rested . . . I immediately felt exhausted again when I saw the sheer chaos of the space where I’d stuck everything I’d pulled out. Thinking about all the decisions to be made drained my energy. This is the same thing that happened when I used to pull everything of a space I was decluttering.  I glanced at the empty closet and felt happy. Then, as I took a step back, I tripped over the pile of stuff I had just removed and scowled as I looked down at the mess. The mess, now outside the space where it was formerly shoved and hidden, was completely overwhelming. I felt my heart drop and all my energy drain out through my big toe. I felt exhausted, even if the heaviest thing I removed from that closet was a bag full of feathers. (

[monaleen101]

Today, I’m sharing what is (in my personal-turned-professional opinion) the absolute worst decluttering strategy ever. For me. Don’t separate those two things. The thing about it being the absolute worst, and the part about it being the worst for me. I finally started making real, lasting, bigtime decluttering progress when I stopped crying about how “methods” didn’t work for me, and decluttered anyway. Imperfectly. As I decluttered, I figured out the best way for me to declutter. As I made mistakes, I learned how to avoid them. But this post is about what I have found to be the absolute worst decluttering strategy for me. And just so you know, in case you landed here as a newbie, this strategy has turned out to be the worst ever for a whole lot of other people whom I have encountered here on the internet. Are you ready? The absolute worst decluttering strategy ever (for me) is pulling everything out of a space as the first step of decluttering. Or as any step of decluttering. And yet, this is the step I always heard was the most obvious one. I still hear it. Things like, “Y’know, pulling everything out is just what you have to do.” Or “Well, everyone knows you have to pull everything out to be able to declutter.” Or (and this is the most common): “Unfortunately, things have to get worse before they can get better.” I say nope. Nopity nope nope nope. The above statements simply aren’t true. And I’ve proven this in my own home. Again and again and again. I’ve taught you how to declutter without making a bigger mess. I have shared my strategies for making visible progress (and only progress) in any amount of time. I’ve written books about all of that. But for this post, let me just explain why the “pull it all out” method doesn’t work. I’ve had the “opportunity” to experience and observe and consider this problem over the past few months while we had work done on our house. We had our popcorn ceilings professionally scraped, walls painted, and floors replaced. If we only needed to paint, we could have simply moved things around within the room, but new floors meant every single thing had to leave the room. All at once. I was forced to pull everything out. And as I tried to take advantage of the decluttering benefits of this situation, I confirmed that it isn’t good as a decluttering strategy for me. Oh, there are advantages for sure. We totally benefited from seeing the open spaces and evaluating whether certain things needed to go back in at all. But the problem happens when reality happens. And I have to let reality win over the ideal way of doing something. In decluttering reality, exhaustion hits. Moving furniture is physically exhausting. Moving every item out of one room into another room and then maneuvering in the double-stuffed room is ultra-exhausting. All that is obvious. No one is going to argue about the special-kind-of-tired caused by moving furniture. But even when I was well-rested . . . I immediately felt exhausted again when I saw the sheer chaos of the space where I’d stuck everything I’d pulled out. Thinking about all the decisions to be made drained my energy. This is the same thing that happened when I used to pull everything of a space I was decluttering.  I glanced at the empty closet and felt happy. Then, as I took a step back, I tripped over the pile of stuff I had just removed and scowled as I looked down at the mess. The mess, now outside the space where it was formerly shoved and hidden, was completely overwhelming. I felt my heart drop and all my energy drain out through my big toe. I felt exhausted, even if the heaviest thing I removed from that closet was a bag full of feathers. (

[iamownerofme]

Today, I’m sharing what is (in my personal-turned-professional opinion) the absolute worst decluttering strategy ever. For me. Don’t separate those two things. The thing about it being the absolute worst, and the part about it being the worst for me. I finally started making real, lasting, bigtime decluttering progress when I stopped crying about how “methods” didn’t work for me, and decluttered anyway. Imperfectly. As I decluttered, I figured out the best way for me to declutter. As I made mistakes, I learned how to avoid them. But this post is about what I have found to be the absolute worst decluttering strategy for me. And just so you know, in case you landed here as a newbie, this strategy has turned out to be the worst ever for a whole lot of other people whom I have encountered here on the internet. Are you ready? The absolute worst decluttering strategy ever (for me) is pulling everything out of a space as the first step of decluttering. Or as any step of decluttering. And yet, this is the step I always heard was the most obvious one. I still hear it. Things like, “Y’know, pulling everything out is just what you have to do.” Or “Well, everyone knows you have to pull everything out to be able to declutter.” Or (and this is the most common): “Unfortunately, things have to get worse before they can get better.” I say nope. Nopity nope nope nope. The above statements simply aren’t true. And I’ve proven this in my own home. Again and again and again. I’ve taught you how to declutter without making a bigger mess. I have shared my strategies for making visible progress (and only progress) in any amount of time. I’ve written books about all of that. But for this post, let me just explain why the “pull it all out” method doesn’t work. I’ve had the “opportunity” to experience and observe and consider this problem over the past few months while we had work done on our house. We had our popcorn ceilings professionally scraped, walls painted, and floors replaced. If we only needed to paint, we could have simply moved things around within the room, but new floors meant every single thing had to leave the room. All at once. I was forced to pull everything out. And as I tried to take advantage of the decluttering benefits of this situation, I confirmed that it isn’t good as a decluttering strategy for me. Oh, there are advantages for sure. We totally benefited from seeing the open spaces and evaluating whether certain things needed to go back in at all. But the problem happens when reality happens. And I have to let reality win over the ideal way of doing something. In decluttering reality, exhaustion hits. Moving furniture is physically exhausting. Moving every item out of one room into another room and then maneuvering in the double-stuffed room is ultra-exhausting. All that is obvious. No one is going to argue about the special-kind-of-tired caused by moving furniture. But even when I was well-rested . . . I immediately felt exhausted again when I saw the sheer chaos of the space where I’d stuck everything I’d pulled out. Thinking about all the decisions to be made drained my energy. This is the same thing that happened when I used to pull everything of a space I was decluttering.  I glanced at the empty closet and felt happy. Then, as I took a step back, I tripped over the pile of stuff I had just removed and scowled as I looked down at the mess. The mess, now outside the space where it was formerly shoved and hidden, was completely overwhelming. I felt my heart drop and all my energy drain out through my big toe. I felt exhausted, even if the heaviest thing I removed from that closet was a bag full of feathers. (

[shelyold]

Today, I’m sharing what is (in my personal-turned-professional opinion) the absolute worst decluttering strategy ever. For me. Don’t separate those two things. The thing about it being the absolute worst, and the part about it being the worst for me. I finally started making real, lasting, bigtime decluttering progress when I stopped crying about how “methods” didn’t work for me, and decluttered anyway. Imperfectly. As I decluttered, I figured out the best way for me to declutter. As I made mistakes, I learned how to avoid them. But this post is about what I have found to be the absolute worst decluttering strategy for me. And just so you know, in case you landed here as a newbie, this strategy has turned out to be the worst ever for a whole lot of other people whom I have encountered here on the internet. Are you ready? The absolute worst decluttering strategy ever (for me) is pulling everything out of a space as the first step of decluttering. Or as any step of decluttering. And yet, this is the step I always heard was the most obvious one. I still hear it. Things like, “Y’know, pulling everything out is just what you have to do.” Or “Well, everyone knows you have to pull everything out to be able to declutter.” Or (and this is the most common): “Unfortunately, things have to get worse before they can get better.” I say nope. Nopity nope nope nope. The above statements simply aren’t true. And I’ve proven this in my own home. Again and again and again. I’ve taught you how to declutter without making a bigger mess. I have shared my strategies for making visible progress (and only progress) in any amount of time. I’ve written books about all of that. But for this post, let me just explain why the “pull it all out” method doesn’t work. I’ve had the “opportunity” to experience and observe and consider this problem over the past few months while we had work done on our house. We had our popcorn ceilings professionally scraped, walls painted, and floors replaced. If we only needed to paint, we could have simply moved things around within the room, but new floors meant every single thing had to leave the room. All at once. I was forced to pull everything out. And as I tried to take advantage of the decluttering benefits of this situation, I confirmed that it isn’t good as a decluttering strategy for me. Oh, there are advantages for sure. We totally benefited from seeing the open spaces and evaluating whether certain things needed to go back in at all. But the problem happens when reality happens. And I have to let reality win over the ideal way of doing something. In decluttering reality, exhaustion hits. Moving furniture is physically exhausting. Moving every item out of one room into another room and then maneuvering in the double-stuffed room is ultra-exhausting. All that is obvious. No one is going to argue about the special-kind-of-tired caused by moving furniture. But even when I was well-rested . . . I immediately felt exhausted again when I saw the sheer chaos of the space where I’d stuck everything I’d pulled out. Thinking about all the decisions to be made drained my energy. This is the same thing that happened when I used to pull everything of a space I was decluttering.  I glanced at the empty closet and felt happy. Then, as I took a step back, I tripped over the pile of stuff I had just removed and scowled as I looked down at the mess. The mess, now outside the space where it was formerly shoved and hidden, was completely overwhelming. I felt my heart drop and all my energy drain out through my big toe. I felt exhausted, even if the heaviest thing I removed from that closet was a bag full of feathers. (

[iammeandmy]

Today, I’m sharing what is (in my personal-turned-professional opinion) the absolute worst decluttering strategy ever. For me. Don’t separate those two things. The thing about it being the absolute worst, and the part about it being the worst for me. I finally started making real, lasting, bigtime decluttering progress when I stopped crying about how “methods” didn’t work for me, and decluttered anyway. Imperfectly. As I decluttered, I figured out the best way for me to declutter. As I made mistakes, I learned how to avoid them. But this post is about what I have found to be the absolute worst decluttering strategy for me. And just so you know, in case you landed here as a newbie, this strategy has turned out to be the worst ever for a whole lot of other people whom I have encountered here on the internet. Are you ready? The absolute worst decluttering strategy ever (for me) is pulling everything out of a space as the first step of decluttering. Or as any step of decluttering. And yet, this is the step I always heard was the most obvious one. I still hear it. Things like, “Y’know, pulling everything out is just what you have to do.” Or “Well, everyone knows you have to pull everything out to be able to declutter.” Or (and this is the most common): “Unfortunately, things have to get worse before they can get better.” I say nope. Nopity nope nope nope. The above statements simply aren’t true. And I’ve proven this in my own home. Again and again and again. I’ve taught you how to declutter without making a bigger mess. I have shared my strategies for making visible progress (and only progress) in any amount of time. I’ve written books about all of that. But for this post, let me just explain why the “pull it all out” method doesn’t work. I’ve had the “opportunity” to experience and observe and consider this problem over the past few months while we had work done on our house. We had our popcorn ceilings professionally scraped, walls painted, and floors replaced. If we only needed to paint, we could have simply moved things around within the room, but new floors meant every single thing had to leave the room. All at once. I was forced to pull everything out. And as I tried to take advantage of the decluttering benefits of this situation, I confirmed that it isn’t good as a decluttering strategy for me. Oh, there are advantages for sure. We totally benefited from seeing the open spaces and evaluating whether certain things needed to go back in at all. But the problem happens when reality happens. And I have to let reality win over the ideal way of doing something. In decluttering reality, exhaustion hits. Moving furniture is physically exhausting. Moving every item out of one room into another room and then maneuvering in the double-stuffed room is ultra-exhausting. All that is obvious. No one is going to argue about the special-kind-of-tired caused by moving furniture. But even when I was well-rested . . . I immediately felt exhausted again when I saw the sheer chaos of the space where I’d stuck everything I’d pulled out. Thinking about all the decisions to be made drained my energy. This is the same thing that happened when I used to pull everything of a space I was decluttering.  I glanced at the empty closet and felt happy. Then, as I took a step back, I tripped over the pile of stuff I had just removed and scowled as I looked down at the mess. The mess, now outside the space where it was formerly shoved and hidden, was completely overwhelming. I felt my heart drop and all my energy drain out through my big toe. I felt exhausted, even if the heaviest thing I removed from that closet was a bag full of feathers. (

[januishstory]

Today, I’m sharing what is (in my personal-turned-professional opinion) the absolute worst decluttering strategy ever. For me. Don’t separate those two things. The thing about it being the absolute worst, and the part about it being the worst for me. I finally started making real, lasting, bigtime decluttering progress when I stopped crying about how “methods” didn’t work for me, and decluttered anyway. Imperfectly. As I decluttered, I figured out the best way for me to declutter. As I made mistakes, I learned how to avoid them. But this post is about what I have found to be the absolute worst decluttering strategy for me. And just so you know, in case you landed here as a newbie, this strategy has turned out to be the worst ever for a whole lot of other people whom I have encountered here on the internet. Are you ready? The absolute worst decluttering strategy ever (for me) is pulling everything out of a space as the first step of decluttering. Or as any step of decluttering. And yet, this is the step I always heard was the most obvious one. I still hear it. Things like, “Y’know, pulling everything out is just what you have to do.” Or “Well, everyone knows you have to pull everything out to be able to declutter.” Or (and this is the most common): “Unfortunately, things have to get worse before they can get better.” I say nope. Nopity nope nope nope. The above statements simply aren’t true. And I’ve proven this in my own home. Again and again and again. I’ve taught you how to declutter without making a bigger mess. I have shared my strategies for making visible progress (and only progress) in any amount of time. I’ve written books about all of that. But for this post, let me just explain why the “pull it all out” method doesn’t work. I’ve had the “opportunity” to experience and observe and consider this problem over the past few months while we had work done on our house. We had our popcorn ceilings professionally scraped, walls painted, and floors replaced. If we only needed to paint, we could have simply moved things around within the room, but new floors meant every single thing had to leave the room. All at once. I was forced to pull everything out. And as I tried to take advantage of the decluttering benefits of this situation, I confirmed that it isn’t good as a decluttering strategy for me. Oh, there are advantages for sure. We totally benefited from seeing the open spaces and evaluating whether certain things needed to go back in at all. But the problem happens when reality happens. And I have to let reality win over the ideal way of doing something. In decluttering reality, exhaustion hits. Moving furniture is physically exhausting. Moving every item out of one room into another room and then maneuvering in the double-stuffed room is ultra-exhausting. All that is obvious. No one is going to argue about the special-kind-of-tired caused by moving furniture. But even when I was well-rested . . . I immediately felt exhausted again when I saw the sheer chaos of the space where I’d stuck everything I’d pulled out. Thinking about all the decisions to be made drained my energy. This is the same thing that happened when I used to pull everything of a space I was decluttering.  I glanced at the empty closet and felt happy. Then, as I took a step back, I tripped over the pile of stuff I had just removed and scowled as I looked down at the mess. The mess, now outside the space where it was formerly shoved and hidden, was completely overwhelming. I felt my heart drop and all my energy drain out through my big toe. I felt exhausted, even if the heaviest thing I removed from that closet was a bag full of feathers. (

[princetofbone]

Summer Studying Tips

As it around the time schools get out for summer, I wanted to share some tips I’ve learned over my many years of doing summer math homework and writing essays for various purposes. I’ve done this enough to know that there are really fucking painful ways to do it and ways that don’t suck nearly as much. Lets get cracklakin!

Timing:

- Ideally you should start early. This post is happening at the start of summer because you should start your studying at the beginning of summer. I like to organize my workload in a bell curve for maximum rest and least amount of cramming at the end. This means that you are starting the summer with a smallish amount of work (to rest and do fun things to reset from the schoolyear), and doing more and more every day as the summer progresses (helps stave off boredom and gets things done), and then start doing less to re-rest yourself so you can be fresh and ready for the next year. All of this while still being finished with no need to cram a bunch of work in at the end of the summer.

- While this is a different aspect of “timing” it is, in my opinion, more important.  Have a set time (or many set times you rotate between) to do your summer work. Make sure this time is not when other people are going to be inviting you to things or when you can hear or see people outside doing fun things. For me, this means at four or five in the morning. I wake up and get as much done as I can before six, then have the rest of the day to relax without worrying about  having to do anything. This method was practically beaten into me, so I kinda hate it, but I can tell my father to go fuck himself and still use tools he forced upon me. I know many people who only work at noon because they like sitting outside in the morning sun and they hang out with friends in the evening. Overall for this one, just make sure that the time you pick isn’t a time where you typically do something because the worst feeling in the world is fomo while studying- it kills nay and all motivation.

Location:

I feel like every study tips post known to man says something or rather about how important location is- and it is super important! Like super super important! but no-one talks about why it is so important. And that good locations for studying depend on who you are and how you do work. I personally struggle to work in cafes because I can hear people talking and I’m nosey as hell. I have friends who can’t work in libraries because the quiet + book noises freaks her out. I can’t work in my kitchen because its nearly impossible for me to focus there. the main things I think about before I try working in a new space are 

1) how loud will it be

2) what kind of noise will it be

3)have I spent time there before doing something else (that my mind will want to do more than study)

4) is it somewhere I have the space to study + internet

5) will I run into someone I know

6) can I be there a decently long amount of time without paying/not paying very much?

7) what is the temperature like

8) what is the likelihood of a kids club showing up

obviously these criteria are different for each person, but they might be a good jumping off place- because it is summer and most kids are getting out of school, avoiding places that will be overrun with them is probably a good idea. In addition, make sure to settle down in a place that is a comfortable temperature and a place where the temp wont fluctuate too much.

Motivation:

I think overall this is the most important thing to keep in mind. It doesn't matter how well you plan out when and where you will be doing your work, it is hell to do if you don’t want to do it. 

I’m not going to tell you to love your subject, but if it is something that you don't like, that feels pointless, and you think it has absolutely no impact on your future, it’s going to be a nightmare to get done. I have no tips for you if you are in this situation.

If you don’t want to do it because it is annoying, but it’s a necessary class that you need to take, that works great! put on some fun music and force yourself to do it. It will suck but if it is part of your major or in any way connected to something you like or are passionate about, follow those connections. For example, I was in this awful writing class last semester. The teacher was bad and there was nothing really to be learned. it was a class i had to take solely for the credits. I decided that I was going to be obnoxious and write every damn essay about corsetry and the patriarchy. I swear to got I have 80 pages of writing about the damn subject. I should be publishing a book at this point. (I was one of my favorite classes that semester bc I had so much fun with the topic)

If you don’t want to do it because it’s hard, buckle up and open khan academy and YouTube. nearly every subject known to man is covered in some level on those two sites, and if that fails, find an alternate textbook to the one you have and see if having two perspectives makes it make sense. 

If it’s something you want to do but just cant force yourself to do and you’ve been scrolling for hours, go brush your teeth, change clothes or take a shower and start trying to do your work somewhere new.

I hope one of these helped, and if you have more ideas/tips pls let me know bc I’m writing this to procrastinate on my own summer work.

[warsofasoiaf]

Writing Characters With Believable Military PTSD

I typically write these writing and worldbuilding essays from a dispassionate perspective, offering advice and context to prospective writers from as neutral a point of view as I can manage, with the goal being to present specific pieces of information and broader concepts that can hopefully improve writing and build creators’ confidence to bring their projects to fruition, whether that be writing, tabletop gaming, video game programming, or anything that suits their fancy. While writing this essay though, I struggled to maintain that perspective. Certainly, the importance of the topic to me was a factor, but ultimately, I saw impersonality just as a suboptimal presentation method for something so intensely personal. I do maintain some impartiality particularly in places where historical or academic context is called for, but in other respects I’ve opted for a different approach. Ultimately, this essay is a labor of love for me, love for those who suffer from military PTSD, love for those who love those who suffer from it, and love for writers who want to, in the way that they so choose, help those two other groups out. Thus, this is a different type of essay in certain segments than my usual fare; I hope the essay isn’t an unreadable chimera because of it.

This essay focuses on military-related PTSD. While there are some concepts that translate well into PTSD in the civilian sphere, there are unique elements that do not necessarily fit the mold in both directions, so for someone hoping to write a different form of PTSD, I would recommend finding other resources that could better suit your purposes. I also recommend using more than one source just in general, trauma is personal and so multiple sources can help provide a wide range of experiences to draw upon, which should hopefully improve any creative work.

And as a final introductory note, traumatic experiences are deeply personal. If you are using someone you know as a model for your writing, you owe it to that person to communicate exactly what you are doing and to ask their permission every step of the way. I consider it a request out of politeness to implore any author who uses someone else’s experiences to inform their writing in any capacity, but when it comes to the truly negative experiences in someone’s life, this rises higher from request to demand. You will ask someone before taking a negative experience from their own life and placing it into your creative works, and you will not hide anything about it from them. Receiving it is a great sign of trust. The opposite is a travesty, robbing someone of a piece of themselves and placing it upon display as a grotesque exhibit. And if that sounds ghoulish and macabre, it’s because it is, without hyperbole. Don’t do it.

Why Write PTSD?

What is the purpose of including PTSD in a creative work? There have been plenty of art therapy actions taken by those who suffer PTSD to create something from their condition, which can be as profound for those who do not have it as it is therapeutic for those that do, but why would someone include it in their creative works, and why is some no-name guy on the internet writing an essay offering tips as to how to do it better?

Certainly, one key element is that it’s real, and it happens. If art is to reflect upon reality, PTSD suffered by soldiers is one element of that, so art can reflect it, but what specifically about PTSD, as opposed to any other facet of existence? Author preference certainly plays a factor, but why would someone try to include something that is difficult to understand and difficult to portray? While everyone comes to their own reason, I think that a significant number of people are curious about what exactly goes on in the minds of someone suffering through PTSD, and creative works allow them a way to explore it, much the way fiction can explore scenarios and emotions that are either unlikely or unsafe to explore in reality. If that’s the case, then the purpose of this essay is rather simple, to make the PTSD examination more grounded in reality and thus a better reflection of it. But experiences are unique even if discernable patterns emerge, so in that sense, no essay created by an amateur writer with no psychological experience could be an authoritative take on reality, the nature of which would is far beyond the scope of this essay.

For my own part, I think that well-done creative works involving PTSD is meant to break down the isolation that it can cause in its wake. Veterans suffering may feel that they are alone, that their loved ones cannot understand them and the burden of trying to create that would simply push them away; better instead to have the imperfect bonds that they currently have than risk losing them entirely. For those who are on the outside looking in, isolation lurks there as well, a gulf that seems impossible to breach and possibly intrusive to even try. Creative works that depict PTSD can help create a sense that victims aren’t alone, that there are people that understand and can help without demeaning the sense of self-worth. Of course, another element would be to reduce the amount of poorly-done depictions of PTSD. Some creative works use PTSD as a backstory element, relegating a defining and important element of an individual’s life as an aside, or a minor problem that can be resolved with a good hug and a cry or a few nights with the right person. If a well-done creative work can help create a bridge and break down isolation, a poorly-done one can turn victims off, reinforcing the idea that no one understands and worse, no one cares. For others, it gives a completely altered sense of what PTSD is and what they could do to help, keeping them out, confusing them, or other counter-productive actions. In that sense, all the essay is to help build up those who are doing the heavy lifting. I’m not full of so much hubris as to think this is a profound piece of writing that will help others, but if creators are willing to try and do the hard work of building a bridge, I could at least try to help out and provide a wheelbarrow.

An Abbreviated Look At The Many Faces and Names of PTSD Throughout History

PTSD has been observed repeatedly throughout human history, even when it was poorly understood. This means that explorations of PTSD can be written in settings even if they did not have a distinctly modern understanding of neurology, trauma, or related matters. These historical contexts are also useful for worldbuilding a believable response in fictional settings and scenarios that don’t necessarily have a strict analogue in our own history. By providing this historical context, hopefully I can craft a broad-based sense of believable responses to characters with PTSD at a larger level.

In the time of Rome, it was understood by legionnaires that combat was a difficult endeavor, and so troops were typically on the front lines engaged in combat for short periods of time, to be rotated back for rest while others took their place. It was considered ideal, in these situations, to rotate troops that fought together back so that they could rest together. The immediate lesson is obvious, the Romans believed that it was vital for troops to take time to process what they had done and that was best served with quiet periods of rest not just to allow the adrenaline to dissipate (the "combat high"), but a chance for the mind to wrap itself around what the legionnaire had done. The Romans also recognized that camaraderie between fellow soldiers helped soldiers to cope, and this would be a running theme throughout history (and remains as such today). Soldiers were able to empathize with each other, and help each other through times of difficulty. This was not all sanguine, however, Roman legions depended on their strong formations, and a soldier that did not perform their duty could endanger the unit, and so shame in not fulfilling their duty was another means to keep soldiers in line. The idea of not letting down your fellow soldiers is a persistent refrain in coping with the traumas of war, and throughout history this idea has been used for both pleasant and unpleasant means of keeping soldiers in the fight.

In the Middle Ages, Geoffroi de Charny wrote extensively on the difficulties that knights could experience on the campaign trail in his Book of Chivalry. The book highlights the deprivation that knights suffered, from the bad food and poor sleep to the traumatic experience of combat to being away from family and friends to the loss of valued comrades to combat and infection; each of these is understood as a significant stressor that puts great strain on the mental health of soldiers up to today. De Charny recommended focusing on the knightly oaths of service, the needs of the mission of their liege, and the duty of the knight to serve as methods to help bolster the resolve of struggling knights. The book also mentions seeking counseling and guidance from priests or other confidants to help improve their mental health to see their mission through. This wasn’t universal, however. Some severely traumatized individuals were seen as simple cowards, and punished harshly for their perceived cowardice as antithetical to good virtue and to serve as an example.

World War I saw a sharp rise in the reported incidents of military-related PTSD and new understandings and misunderstandings. The rise in the number of soldiers caused a rise in cases of military PTSD, even though the term itself was not known at the time. Especially in the early phases of the war, many soldiers suffering from PTSD were thought to be malingering, pretending to have symptoms to avoid being sent to the front lines. The term “shell shock” was derived because it was believed that the concussive force of artillery bombardment caused brain damage as it rattled the skull or carbon monoxide fumes would damage the brain as they were inhaled, as a means to explain why soldiers could have physical responses such as slurred speech, lack of response to external stimuli, even nigh-on waking catatonia, despite not being hit by rifle rounds or shrapnel. This would later be replaced by the term “battle fatigue” when it became apparent that artillery bombardment was not a predicative indicator. Particularly as manpower shortages became more prevalent, PTSD-sufferers could be sent to firing squads as a means to cow other troops to not abandon their post. Other less fatal methods of shaming could occur, such as the designation “Lack of Moral Fibre,” an official brand of cowardice, as an attempt to shame the members into remembering their duty. As the war developed, and understanding grew, better methods of treatment were made, with rest and comfort provided to slight cases, strict troop rotations observed to rotate men to and from the front lines, and patients not being told that they were being evacuated for nervous breakdown to avoid cementing that idea in their mind. These lessons would continue into World War II, where the term “combat stress reaction” was adopted. While not always strenuously followed, regular rotations were adopted as standard policy. This was still not universal, plenty of units still relied upon bullying members into maintaining their post despite mental trauma.

The American military promotes a culture of competence and ability, particularly for the enlisted ranks, and that lends itself to the soldier viewing themselves in a starkly different fashion than a civilian. Often, a soldier sees the inability to cope with a traumatic experience as a personal failure stemming from the lack of mental fortitude. Owning up to such a lack of capability is tantamount to accepting that they are an inferior soldier, less capable than their fellows. This idea is commonly discussed, and should not be ignored, but it is far from the only reason. The military also possesses a strong culture of fraternity that obligates “Don’t be a fuckup,” is a powerful motivating force, and it leads plenty of members of the military to ignore traumatic experiences out of the perceived need not to put the burden on their squadmates. While most professional militaries stress that seeking mental health for trauma is not considered a sign of weakness, enlisted know that if they receive mental health counseling, it is entirely likely that someone will have to take their place in the meantime. That could potentially mean that another person, particularly in front-line units, are exposed to danger that they would otherwise not be exposed to, potentially exacerbating guilt if said person gets hurt or killed. This is even true in stateside units, plenty of soldiers don’t report for treatment because it would mean dumping work on their fellows, a negative aspect of unit fraternity. Plenty of veterans also simply never are screened for mental health treatment, and usually this lends to a mentality of “well, no one is asking, so I should be fine.” These taken together combine to a heartbreaking reality, oftentimes a modern veteran that seeks help for mental trauma has often coped silently for years, perhaps self-medicating with alcohol or off-label drug usage, and is typically very far along their own path comparatively. Others simply fall through the cracks, not being screened for mental disorders and so do not believe that anything is wrong; after all, if something was wrong, surely the doctors would notice it, right? The current schedule of deployments, which are duration-based and not mission-based, also make it hard for servicemembers to rationalize their experiences and equate them to the mission; there’s no sense of pairing suffering to objectives the way that de Charnay mentioned could help contextualize the deprivation and loss. These sorts of experiences make the soldier feel adrift, and their suffering pointless, which is discouraging on another level. It is one thing to suffer for a cause, it’s another not to know why, amplifying the feelings of powerlessness and furthering the isolation that they feel.

Pen to Page - The Characters and Their Responses

The presentation of PTSD within a character will depend largely on the point-of-view that the author creates. A character that suffers from PTSD depending on the presence of an internal or external point-of-view, will be vastly different experiences on page. Knowing this is essential, as this will determine how the story itself is presenting the disorder. Neither is necessarily more preferable than the other, and is largely a matter of the type of story being told and the personal preference of the author.

Internal perspectives will follow the character’s response from triggering event to immediate response. This allows the author to present a glimpse into what the character is experiencing. In these circumstances, remember that traumatic flashbacks are merely one of many experiences that an average sufferer of PTSD can endure. In a visual medium, flashbacks are time-effective methods to portray a character reliving portions of a traumatic experience, but other forms of media can have other tools. Traumatic flashbacks are not necessarily a direct reliving of an event from start to finish, individuals may instead feel sudden sharp pains of old injuries, be overwhelmed by still images of traumatic scenes or loud traumatic sounds. These can be linked to triggers that bring up the traumatic incident, such as a similar sight, sound, or smell. These moments of linkage are not necessarily experienced linearly or provide a clear sequence of events from start to finish (memory rarely is unless specifically prompted), and it may be to the author’s advantage to not portray them as such in order to communicate the difficulty in mental parsing that the character may be experiencing. Others might be more intrusive, such as violently deranged nightmares that prevent sleep. The author must try to strike a balance between portraying the experience realistically and portraying it logically that audience members can understand. The important thing about these memories is that they are intrusive, unwelcome, and quite stressful, so using techniques that jar the reader, such as the sudden intrusive image of a torn body, a burning vehicle, or another piece of the traumatic incident helps communicate the disorientation. Don't rely simply on shock therapy, it's not enough just to put viscera on the page. Once it is there, the next steps, how the character reacts, is crucial to a believable response.

When the character experiences something that triggers their PTSD, start to describe the stress response, begin rapidly shortening the sentences to simulate the synaptic activity, express the fight-flight-freeze response as the character reacts, using the tools of dramatic action to heighten tension and portraying the experience as something frightful and distinctly undesirable. The triggering incident brings back the fear, such as a pile of rubble on the side of the road being a potential IED location, or a loud firework recalling the initial moments of an enemy ambush. The trauma intrudes, and the character falls deep into the stress response, and now they react. How does this character react? By taking cover? By attacking the aggressor who so reminds them of the face of their enemy? Once the initial event starts, then the character continues to respond. Do they try to get to safety? Secure the area and eliminate the enemy? Eventually, the character likely recognizes their response is inappropriate. It wasn’t a gunshot, it was a car backfiring, the smell of copper isn’t the sight of a blown-apart comrade and the rank odor of blood, it’s just a jug of musty pennies. This fear will lead to control mechanisms where the victim realizes that their response is irrational. Frequently, the fear is still there, and it still struggles with control. This could heighten a feeling a powerlessness in the character as they try and fail to put the fear under control: "Yes, I know this isn’t real and there’s nothing to be afraid of, but I’m still shaking and I am still afraid!" It’s a horrifying logical track, a fear that the victim isn’t even in control of their thoughts - the one place that they should have control - and that they might always be this way. There’s no safety since even their thoughts aren’t safe. Despair might also follow, as the victim frantically asserts to regain control. Usually with time, the fear starts to lessen as the logical centers of the brain regain control, and the fear diminishes. Some times, the victim can't even really recall the exact crippling sense of fear when attempting to recall it, only that they were afraid and that it was deeply scary and awful, but the notion that it happened remains in their mind.

Control mechanisms are also important to developing a believable PTSD victim. Most sufferers dread the PTSD response and so actively avoid objects or situations that could potentially trigger. Someone who may have had to escape from a helicopter falling into the ocean may not like to be immersed in water. Someone who was hit by a hidden IED may swerve to avoid suspicious piles in the road. Someone buried under a collapsing ceiling may become claustrophobic. Thus, many characters with PTSD will be hypervigilant almost to the point of exhaustion, avoiding setting off the undesired response. This hypervigilance is mentally taxing; the character begins to become sluggish mentally as all their energy is squeezed out, leaving them struggling for even the simplest of rational thoughts. This mental fog can be translated onto the page in dramatic effect by adding paragraph length to even simple actions, bringing the reader along into the fog, laboriously seeing the character move to perform simple actions. Then, mix in a loss of a sense of purpose. They’re adrift, not exactly sure what they’re doing and barely aware of what’s happening, although they are thinking and functioning. In the character’s daily life, they are living their life using maximum effort to avoid triggering responses; this is another aspect of control that the character can use as an attempt to claw back some semblance of power in their own lives. Even control methods that aren’t necessarily healthy such as drinking themselves to pass out every night or abusing sleeping pills in an attempt to sleep due to their nightmares, are ways to attempt to regain a sense of normalcy and function. Don’t condescend to these characters and make them pathetic, that’s just another layer of cruelty, but showing the unhealthy coping mechanisms can demonstrate the difficulty that PTSD victims are feeling. Combined with an external perspective, the author can show the damage that these unhealthy actions are doing without casting the character as weak for not taking a different path.

External perspectives focus on the other characters and how they observe and react to the individual in question. Since the internal thought process of the character is not known, sudden reactions to an unknown trigger can be quite jarring for characters unaware, which can mirror real-life experiences that individuals can have with PTSD-sufferers. In these types of stories, the character’s reaction to the victim is paramount. PTSD in real life often evokes feelings of helplessness in loved ones when they simply cannot act to help, can evoke confusion, or anger and resentment. These reactions are powerful emotions with the ability to drive character work, and so external perspectives can be useful for telling a story about what it is like for loved ones who suffer in their own fashion. External perspectives can be used not just in describing triggering episodes, but in exploring how the character established coping mechanisms and how their loved ones react to them. Some mechanisms are distinctly unhealthy, such as alcohol or prescription drug abuse, complete withdrawal, or a refusal to drive vehicles, and these create stress and a feeling of helplessness in characters or can impel them to try and take action. Others can be healthy, and a moment of inspiration and joy for an external perspective could be sharing in that mechanism, demonstrating empathy and understanding which evokes strong pathos, and hopefully to friends of those who suffer from PTSD, a feeling that they too, are not alone.

As the character progresses, successes and failures can often be one of the most realistic and most important things to include within the work, since those consumers who have PTSD will see parts of themselves in the characters, which can build empathy and cut down on the feelings of isolation that many victims of PTSD feel. A character could, over the course of the story, begin weaning themselves off of their control mechanisms, have the feelings of panic subside as their logical sides more quickly assert control, replace unhealthy coping mechanisms with healthier ones, or other elements of character progression and growth. Contrarily, a character making progress could, after experiencing significant but unrelated stressors, backslide either into unhealthy coping mechanisms or be blindsided by another attack. This is a powerful fear for the victim, since it can cause them to think ‘all my progress, all my effort, and I am not free!’ This is often a great fear for PTSD users (people with depression often have the same feeling) that find methods of coping are no longer as effective, and the struggle is perceived as one that they’re ultimately doomed to failure. This feeling of inevitable failure can lead to self-harm and suicide as their avenue of success seems to burn to ash right as it was in their hands. More than one soldier suffering from PTSD has ended up concluding: “Fuck it, I can’t live like this,” as horrible as that is. Don’t be afraid to include setbacks and backsliding, those happen in reality, and can be one of the most isolating fears in their lives; if the goal of portraying PTSD accurately is to help remove that feeling of isolation, then content creators must not avoid these experiences. Success as well as failure are essential to PTSD in characters in stories, these elements moreso than any other, I believe, will transcend the medium and form a connection, fulfilling the objective we set out to include in the beginning paragraphs.

Coming Back to the Beginning

It might be counterintuitive at first glance to say “including military PTSD will probably mean it will be a long journey full of discouraging story beats that might make readers depressed,” because that’s definitely going to discourage some readers to do that. I don’t see it that way, though. The people that want to do it should go in knowing it’s going to be hard, and let that strengthen their resolve, and put the best creation they can forward. The opposite is also true. Not every prospective author has to want to include any number of difficult subjects in their works, and that’s perfectly fine. Content creators must be free to shape the craft that they so desire without the need to be obligated to tackle every difficult issue, and so no content creator should be thought of as lesser or inferior because they opt not to include it in their works. I think that’s honestly stronger than handling an important topic poorly, or even worse, frivolously. Neither should anyone think that a content creator not including PTSD in their works means that they don’t care about those who suffer from it or for those who care about them or who simply don’t care about the subject in general. That’s just a terrible way to treat someone, and in the end, this entire excursion was about the opposite

Ultimately, this essay is a chance not only to help improve creative works involving PTSD, but to reflect on the creative process. Those who still want to proceed, by all means, do so. Hopefully this essay will help you create something that can reach someone. If every piece of work that helps portray PTSD can reach someone somewhere and make things easier, even if ever so little, well then, that’s what it’s really all about.

Hoping everyone has a peaceful Memorial Day. Be good to each to other.

SLAL

[daemonhxckergrrl]

Privacy, accounts, and password managers

!!! NOTE: THIS GUIDE WILL BE UPDATED AND REFINED; CONSIDER THIS A FIRST PASS !!!

Preamble

this is a GUIDE on the basics of security, and how to set up a password manager. i'll run-through of the aims of security practices and include a glossary at the end for some of the more technical terms d:

The point of security

contrary to popular belief, the point of security measures (in cyber- or meatspace) is not to make it impossible to gain access to the Protected Thing; the point is to significantly reduce the chance of unauthorised access to the Protected Thing.

we do this by making it:

harder (think rpg skill check)

more time consuming (people get bored; it's also less profitable)

less appealing (add obstacles)

Security basics

the golden rules of security and privacy:

SHUT THE FUCK UP (for the love of Void, stop sharing your personal info publicly! or privately, for that matter)

sandboxes and containers ! (keep your personal shit separate from your work shit; doubly so for activists)

change passwords regularly

use 2FA/MFA (security layers are important !)

don't sign up for accounts/services you don't need ??

Password managers

a password manager is a tool that stores login information for your various accounts in an encrypted database, protected by a master password. this means you can have stronger passwords for your social media, bank login, online shopping etc. without having to remember them.

many password managers these days are cloud-based, meaning the password database is stored on the servers of the company offering the service, and you can access these across multiple devices. many also include browser extensions.

!!! WARNING: USING A CLOUD-BASED PASSWORD MANAGER MEANS PLACING TRUST IN THAT COMPANY TO PROTECT YOUR DATA !!!

there's also local password managers that keep their database on your computer/phone/external drive. the trade-off here is trust (and ownership of your data) vs convenience. there's methods to get around this (manual transfer or an automatic file sync) but they're beyond this GUIDE's scope.

How to set this up

i personally use a local password manager (KeePassXC) as i don't trust companies like Bitwarden and LastPass. the former, while open source, added a feature to send files/passwords between users, and the latter is proprietary so can't be independently audited.

KeePassXC pros:

open source (can be independently audited)

trusted lineage

multiple database support

in-depth encryption options (including 2FA via cryptographic* or hardware key)

strong and customisable password generation

folder-based organisation

password expiry

function to copy a username/password to clipboard then clear the clipboard after 10 seconds

cons:

is local only unless you set up a manual sync

*(no this isn't that kind of crypto, though that is where those currencies got their name)

Preparation

before setting up your fancy new password manager, i would recommend creating a list (ideally on paper that can be shredded, or an air-gapped device) of all your accounts and services you currently use. we're gonna weed out the ones we don't need and provide ourselves a way to track our progress.

follow these steps:

write down the names of all the services you use, including any you have multiple of (eg Twitter, Private Twitter, Amazon, Reddit, Old Reddit you don't use anymore)

put those you wish to delete into a separate column (mark if you wish to delete and remake)

organise the rest of your accounts into groups; these can be as simple as personal/work or you could split off nsfw content or your social media, however you see fit

Deletion

our next step is deleting those accounts we no longer want. depending on the service, this ranges from easy to impossible; there's also the issue of which services may still hold onto your data. the following sites cover most of the major services for deletion or getting your data: https://justdeleteme.xyz https://justgetmydata.com

now we have our accounts nicely organised ! it's time to structure things. with these groups we have a few options:

1 database, folder separation

separate databases

memorise master passwords

store master passwords in master database

store master passwords on air-gapped device/hardware key

store master passwords on something non-electronic

Each has advantages and disadvantages, but i recommend any of the separate databases methods. if someone gains access to your socials database they haven't also gained access to your bank account.

Database creation

choose strong (memorable if needed) passwords for your databases. for extra security, allow KeePassXC to generate a key - just remember you will need this key file and your password every time you unlock the database.

the time slider is a tradeoff between convenience and security - this is entirely down to your needs. as these databases are encrypted, they're safe to create backups of. i recommend keeping a backup on an air-gapped device or even external storage media. give this a strong password and store in a safe place.

!!! WARNING: IF YOU HAVE NO BACKUPS AND ACCIDENTALLY DELETE YOUR DATABASE FILE, YOUR PASSWORDS ARE GONE. PLEASE MAKE A SAFE BACKUP !!!

Migration

now it's time to migrate. using the organised sheet you created earlier, go through one-by-one and add each account. this is a good time to check your settings on each account, change their passwords (using KeePassXC's generator) and disable what tracking/data collection you can.

here are some useful links - i recommend switching from gmail/hotmail/yahoo to something more secure, and reading up on dark patterns (how companies trick you into being tracked or buying services):

email alternatives (will expand into proper post later:

https://protonmail.com

https://tutanota.com

https://posteo.de

dark patterns

privacy addons

cookies

Next Steps

that's it !! just remember to update your passwords regularly and keep from cross-contamination !! and don't overshare personal information !!! there will be more GUIDEs and REPO links to other aspects of privacy and security in the future. password managers are only the tip of the iceberg

[the-ice-sculpture]

I’m really tired of seeing thinly (or not so thinly) disguised insults towards anyone who has even a few criticisms of the Loki show. These insults often come with an air of self-believed intellectual superiority and condescension. Whether it’s intended or otherwise, there are underlying implications and insinuations in common arguments I’ve seen a lot of, which basically boils down to the following:

You can’t distinguish between your own personal headcanons and reality = you'll push your own idea of what something should be onto something so much you won’t even be aware of it and you’ll be frustrated when it doesn’t meet those expectations. You don’t have enough self-awareness to tell the difference between what exists in your imagination and what exists in reality (unlike me, who doesn’t need to push any ideas about what I’d like in terms of characterisation because I personally believe the show already happens to reflect that)

You don’t understand the nuance of it = you’re not intelligent enough to think in shades of grey and varying degrees of subtlety and interpret this (the same way I do). Your thinking is shallow and your ability to analyse lacks depth. Regardless of your justification, if you think there are OOC moments, then you’re just failing to pick up on the nuance. You need someone (such as me) to hold your hand and tell you what to think and how to see (what I claim) is really there

You don’t understand how storytelling works = you can’t recognise any devices used and why they’re used. (Unlike me, you’re not clever enough to understand what the show is doing and the purpose of why it’s doing it.) If you criticise some of the execution of the storytelling methods the show has adopted then it can only be from a lack of understanding on your end and nothing else 

You just want the show to be like fanfiction = you’re incapable of wanting different things from fanfiction and canon and you don’t have the intelligence to recognise this. (I know this because I can recognise this and ‘diagnose’ it in other people)

Loki’s obviously acting to trick the TVA/people into underestimating him = it’s idiotic not to interpret this theory that’s currently unconfirmed in canon as of S01E03 the same as me. If you have doubts then you’re incapable of picking up on the clues that (I personally believe) are there

You’re determined to not like the show. You want to tear it apart = all of your opinions and arguments can and should be rendered invalid regardless of your justification. If you don’t like certain aspects then it’s because you never gave the show a fair go to begin with. Therefore, you’re narrowminded and it’s your own fault if you don’t like it/elements of it because you never wanted to like it in the first place. You want to be miserable

You’re all the same = you can’t think for yourself. Each one of you can be generalised to one hivemind-like entity with no variance in opinions or your justification of them and you’ll blindly follow each other without any critical thought. If you express criticism, you’re now an anti. It’s black and white: either you’re completely pro-show or anti-show and there’s no room for anything in between

You’re stuck in the past = if you’re not completely onboard with any tonal and character changes you find jarring then you’re incapable of accepting change. You just want something unimaginative and uncreative and boring (which I might imply reflects your personality)

It’s not until now that Loki’s finally shown in character = people who thought he was in character in previous movies are wrong and aren’t real fans if they don’t accept this. There’s no room for extrapolation from previous movies, and if you do that then you’re just using your own headcanons so you must be wrong about any perceived changes in his character. (But if I extrapolate from previous movies to justify some of the show’s choices with his characterisation, then that’s completely fine)

You’re making your mind up before the whole show is even released = you can’t have any opinions about the show so far until you’ve seen all the episodes. (Unless, like me, you’re happy with the show)

If you’re reading this and are agreeing with the takes on anyone who expresses so much as a few criticisms, then please read the rest of this post.

I want to emphasise that it’s only a fraction and far from all people who like the show who I’ve seen these kind of takes from, and I have nothing against people enjoying the show. It’s only when I see stuff like the claims listed above that I become frustrated.

People will have different takes and interpretations, it’s only natural. No one can call an interpretation of a character and/or how they’re presented objectively wrong or objectively right. But that doesn’t mean it’s acceptable for anyone to resort to insulting others (whether blatantly or through implication) who have opinions that differ to their own.

Just as a thought experiment, let’s try this the other way around, shall we? Let’s imagine that some of the people who aren’t enjoying aspects of the show start spreading posts about the people enjoying it. If this was to occur, there’d probably be posts about how anyone who thinks he’s in character will blindly go along with whatever show creators tell them, that they (the fans of the show) must have never understood the depth of Loki to begin with so they can’t be real fans, that they’re so determined to enjoy the show that they’ll twist the narrative to suit their own needs and desperately invent reasons to accept it... 

I could think of more but I’m going to stop here because, ultimately, it’s not nice, is it? It comes across as a super shitty thing to do for a reason: it is super shitty. 

I hope it goes without saying that I'm not claiming the examples I made up are true. No one should be claiming anything like the things I invented for my thought experiment are true in public, no matter where on the spectrum of opinions on the show they sit. It’s rude and insulting and would contribute greatly towards further fandom division and a toxic environment filled with feelings of hostility over something fictional to begin with. 

No one is intellectually superior for their opinions on a TV show. People can and should feel however they feel about the show. In an ideal world, they should be able to express that without any harassment or being treated in a derogatory manner or made to feel like they have no place in fandom. This goes for negative opinions and positive opinions and anything in between.

I just really wish people would keep their opinions restricted to the content of the show itself rather than reactions to it sometimes for reasons like this. If groups of people can’t do it without feeling the need to make it out like they’re intellectually superior and anyone who expresses opinions that differ to theirs must be stupid then maybe they shouldn’t be doing it at all. Especially when the overwhelming majority of the more critical people go out of their way to tag their stuff so more positive people can avoid it if it gets them down. More critical people don’t have to do it, but the vast majority of the time they do it as a curtesy. It’d be nice if that curtesy wasn’t repaid by being so disrespected.

And please, before piling on someone’s post about how they’re just lacking a nuanced understanding or are applying their own headcanons, maybe consider that your own interpretation of someone’s opinion could be doing precisely the same thing.

One final thing I’m adding as a preventative measure: if your response to reading this is something along the lines of going ‘but some people really can’t distinguish their headcanons from reality!’ then you’ve really missed the point. The point of this post isn’t to debate whether or not every claim is valid (that would have to be a case by case analysis, and it would be so open to interpretation that you could never reach a definitive conclusion anyway, so it’d be pointless). The point is that it’s incredibly rude to publicly insult someone’s intelligence and make up a bunch of condescending assumptions about them based on their opinions. If you’re treating someone or a group of people in real life like that (and yes, if they’re from the internet then they’re still real people) then you’re doing something far worse than the people I’ve seen branded as toxic people for expressing criticisms of fiction.

*For the record, I’m not saying that anyone with criticisms has never said something along the lines of my thought experiment examples. I haven’t seen any of that myself, but I’m not all knowing. I’m just reflecting on what I have seen, and the vast majority of it has come from a fraction of people without (or with far fewer) criticisms of the show. But it’s irrelevant who it comes from, because my point remains the same: it’s shitty regardless of who says it