#if u are dedicated enough to read to the end ...

[infinitelyweary]

Has anyone endlessly dissected Armand's subtle Marius shade yet

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[jeonginsleftcheek]

Dolly

pairing: hyunjin x afab!reader

synopsis: you feel lonely and buy a new sex doll on the market, not knowing what you got yourself into.

genre: smut, fluff, sci-fi

word count: 10.3k

warnings: alcohol, multiple sex scenes, unprotected sex, oral (f and m), squirting, creampies

a/n: spooktober continues🤭🫶🏻 if u love black mirror, these are vibes for u! also i'm sorry if the ending seems rushed but i have two more things to write for hyunjin before i continue with my spooktober🫠

!!! this fic has an ambiguous ending

~ divider by @bunnysrph

~ Masterlist

~ Dolly masterlist

Your cursor hovers over the 'continue to payment' button.

Are you really doing this?

It's embarassing enough that you can't get a date lately, and everyone around you keeps bugging you about it, asking when you're going to find a partner already.

Like you need one. You were perfectly fine alone.

But everyone has needs, and the ad for the new sex dolls that have just come out on the market looked enticing.

Each one of the new models was a unique one, only one of them made as it was sort of a trial run for them and your attention was captured by Hyunjin, the romantic doll.

It was expensive too, but you had money saved up on the side and thought, why not get something for your pleasure and try something new as well.

'Fuck it!', you thought and clicked on the button, purchasing the doll; there was no going back now.

Eagerly, you awaited the day it would be delivered to your door and three weeks later, there was a big box in the middle of your living room.

Biting on your lip, you stare at the box as your heartbeat quickens.

In the pictures, it looked so real. Like it was a real human being and to say you were a bit disturbed was an understatement.

But as freaky as it was, you were still so curios about it so you opened up the box slowly, your eyes wide for the peculiarity of it all. There were covers neatly placed over the doll, and bubble wrap just about everywhere, but on top of it all was a letter.

You opened it up and it read;

Hello,

my name is Hyunjin and I am your romantic doll.

I love art, good food and wine, long walks on the beach and heartwarming movies.

Please, treat me with great care as I am sensitive, and no matter what you do with me, always end it with cuddles.

Hope you come to love me as much as I already love you.

As you read that, you couldn't help being a little freaked out by the doll professing his love to you, but you had to remind yourself it's just the creators of it who wrote the letter, making the concept more real and human to give some kind of comfort to the buyer and personality to the doll.

Taking a deep breath, you remove all the bubble wrap and slide off the cover.

"Oh." you gasp loudly, your hand slapped on your mouth as you finally see the doll.

He looks too real to be just a doll and for a second you just stare into his eyes, unmoving but somehow warm, his facial features chiseled to perfection, his lips plump and inviting.

Your eyes travel down to see he was dressed in a nice button up, intricate flower patterns sewn into the material, coupled with nice pants and even some very expensive looking shoes.

The doll had jewelry on, his nails were painted, there was so much detail on it; he even had a mole under his eye. You marvelled at the dedication of the people who made it and obviously put a lot of though into Hyunjin.

You notice then that there is a note sticking out of the shirt's pocket and you carefully pick it up.

My love!

I got dressed for our first date!

Hopefully you like it and enjoy our first romantic night together.

"Wow, they really went all out with this." you say out loud as you look at the doll, the next question forming in your mind.

How heavy is the doll?

You spend a few more minutes just examining it with your eyes, too nervous to touch it and you can't get over the way it looks just like a real human being.

You rest your hand on the box, your fingertips gently grazing the doll's cheek.

"Oh!" you gasp, retracting your hand. It feels like real skin and with wide eyes your hand moves closer to his face again, your palm pressing slowly against his cheek.

"Are you alive?" you chuckle to yourself but the doll doesn't answer or move at all, just as you expected.

Your fingers slowly explore the doll's face, his lips are plushy and they seem actually kissable, the material they used, whatever it was, made it seem like they were real human lips.

You lean in closer to take a better look into his eyes, your hand coming up to play with locks of dark hair, which again, seems like real hair, the little curls are soft to the touch and bounce back as you pull on them gently.

Now you're leaning so close to him, and you can smell the nice, comforting scent radiating off of the doll. You've no idea what they used, but he smells fresh and flowery.

"Okay, let's get you out of the box." you lean back and hook your hands under the doll's arms before making it sit up.

His head falls to the side a little, making you feel a bit creeped out because it really seemed like you were handling a dead person instead of an actual doll, but the only indication that it wasn't a dead human is the lightness of it.

He wasn't as light as a feather but he wasn't as heavy as dead weight either.

"Maybe the couch?" you talk to yourself as you look over to your comfy couch, the pillows fluffed up already and a soft blanket thrown over it.

Somehow, thankfully to your regular exercise, you manage to lift the doll into your arms and carry him to the couch.

The way he slumps when you put him down, again freaks you out a little, but for some weird reason you're even more interested in how you can actually use the doll.

You prop him to sit nicely and turn on the tv to some art channel, remembering how the doll 'said' that he likes art.

"I hope that's what you enjoy." you shrug and throw the fluffy blanket over the doll's legs, folding his soft hands into his lap, before you go back to the box to find the manual.

"Here it is." you dig out the booklet and start reading.

They listed the materials but you still had no idea what they were so it flew over your head. There was also a page with pictures of the other dolls and the makers' letter to the customers, thanking them for purchasing the doll.

Flipping the pages, you find what you were looking for.

Your face becomes red as you read the doll's 'abilites', including that his thing can vibrate and cum, he reacts to your touch and that he has a usb charger that gets plugged into the back of his neck.

"W-wow." you nod to yourself as you keep reading until you flip to the last page.

WARNING!

If there are any malfunctions with any part of the doll, please contact our services.

The doll can bathe in water except the charger opening so be aware of that.

Please do not disfigure or mutilate the doll.

Do not throw the doll into the trash.

Do not break, bruise or cut the doll.

If you're not satisfied, you can always return it to us and get your money back.

If you've purchased our Hyunjin doll, do not be too harsh on him considering he's sensitive.

Hope you enjoy the romantic soul you chose!

Bruise? The doll can bruise?

Why are they talking about it like it's alive?

You gulp and turn to look at the couch but the doll is unmoving, turned towards the tv, same position as before.

You peek back into the big box to find another, smaller box inside it, that was beneath the doll's feet earlier.

You carefully take it out, putting it on the floor and opening it curiously.

Inside, you found a change of clothes, more casual looking ones and something to be used as sleep wear. It was like getting a Barbie doll with all her outfits when you were a kid.

So bizzare, yet it made you feel excited in a way.

After getting up, you decide to clean up the mess you made with the bubble wrap and put the box away in your closet, just in case, if you ever wanted to return him.

"Okay." you nod and come back to peek at the doll.

The television screen reflects in his eyes, his hands crossed in his lap, just how you left him and relief washes over you.

Why are you even scared?

You shake your head and decide to prepare lunch.

You're in your kitchen, listening to some slow music as you cook, completely forgetting about the doll sitting in your living room.

That is, until the volume of the tv suddenly increases making you jolt and gasp.

Your back straightens as you turn off the stove.

Slowly turning around, you stare at the direction the sound is coming from.

You swallow and make your way to your couch, you don't know what to expect but the doll is still in the same position you left it, the tv remote is out of his reach, down on the coffee table.

You grab it and decrease the volume before looking back at the doll.

"If that wasn't you, we have ghosts in this apartment. But if it was you, you're obviously wanting my attention." you cross your arms as you stare at him.

Nothing.

"Fine, I will eat lunch with you." you declare before going back to the kitchen to get yourself food.

You mostly eat in front of your tv anyways, not caring about any rules since you live alone, enjoying the freedom it brings you.

Settling down next to Hyunjin, you pull the blanket over your legs too and start eating.

You chuckle to yourself, if someone saw you right now, they'd think you're absolutely insane, sitting down next to an inanimate doll that looks eerily human.

You take a peek at Hyunjin, sighing as he sits still.

"You do look alive. But I'm literally talking to myself." you say and of course get no answer.

Shrugging, you continue about your day, washing dishes and doing laundry, enjoying your selfcare routine after getting your apartment in order, your Hyunjin doll observing your movements from the couch.

In the evening hours, you finally come back to him.

"Are you tired of being in the same position?" you ask, knowing there will be no answer.

"We can have dinner now." you add and leave to the kitchen to bring out some food and a bottle of wine.

"This is insane. Top 5 weirdest things I've done." you talk to yourself as you look down at your black satin nightgown, with lace details on the top, perfectly resting on your chest. "Maybe it even takes up the first place."

You settle next to Hyunjin once again, changing his position a little as you fill up two glasses of wine.

"Our first date, I guess?" you sigh with a chuckle before drinking the wine.

His glass stands full on the coffee table, untouched as you start eating next to him once again.

"I guess I should tell you a bit about myself. I work in an office. I hate my job but it pays the bills." you say, "I always wanted to be in a band though. Played guitar in high school. Never got too far with that. I love art too, you know, any shape or form of it. Maybe that's why I chose you. You seem like an artist. Or you would be if you were real, ha." you chuckle, yapping away as you keep drinking the wine, the doll listening to you without moving.

You keep pouring the wine into both his and your glass but it's only you drinking from both glasses.

It gives you a nice buzz, warmness that spreads through your body and manifests itself between your legs.

Usually, you'd play with your vibrator or dildo but seeing as you got a literal sex doll, you thought you should use him for the purpose he's made for.

"Now, what do I do with you?" you smirk, your hand coming up to play with the doll's hair, twirling the lock in your fingers.

"I mean, I can do anything I want." you nod, scooting closer to the doll.

"I feel fucking crazy." you laugh, pulling the covers off of Hyunjin.

Your hand is pressed on his thigh as you touch him gently through his clothes, your mind still marvelling at the fact that he feels like a real human being.

"I'm curious." you whisper, your fingertip playing with the button of his shirt, wanting to see what he looks like underneath the nice clothes they made him wear.

Slowly, you start unbuttoning the doll, taking your time with it, as anticipation builds up, creating a swirl of excitement inside you.

When you pop open the last button, you open up the shirt and gasp.

"Wow." you lick your lips at the sight, the doll's nipples look aroused, his stomach is toned, it looks like there's a vein leading down into his pants making your eyes fall down at his crotch.

You still have no idea how they made him look so real but you're eager to explore, planting your hands on his chest, running them up and down to his stomach, tracing the vein with your fingertips.

You run your hands back up to his nipples and flick them gently with your thumb before pinching them experimentally.

Gasping, you notice a growing bulge in the doll's pants.

"Am I pushing the right buttons?" you chuckle at your own joke as you continue playing with his nipples.

Your impatience however doesn't let you stall for too long, so your hands make their way down to the hem of his pants.

"Let's see." with a smirk you unbutton and unzip his pants, pulling them down with a little struggle as you have to lift him up a little.

You place your hands on his thighs, squeezing the flesh a little, watching as his cock twitches like he was really alive.

"You really do react to touch." you gasp in wonder, what kind of technology was this?

They even put underwear on him which you think is a nice touch but at this point, you were too curious not to slide them off immediately.

"Woah!" you gasp as his cock springs free of its confines.

You think it's the biggest and most beautiful cock you've ever seen, framed by a neatly cut bush, a visible vein running up the whole length.

You stare at it for a little while before you wrap your hand around it, your other hand fondling his balls.

It feels real once again, like he's throbbing and twitching, hot and heavy on your palm, a bead of precum at the tip.

"What in the hell?" you mumble, your finger swiping at the tip as you gather the liquid and bring it to your lips.

You suck your finger into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it and tasting the sweetness of the doll.

How he tasted so sweet was beyond you.

"Fuck it." you chuckle, pulling off your nightgown and tossing it aside, which leaves you completely naked like the doll is.

"I didn't even kiss you. Not very romantic of me." you smirk as you throw your leg over Hyunjin, sitting in his lap, your wet folds pressed against his cock.

You lean in and press a kiss to his lips, and of course the doll doesn't kiss back but his lips move with your movement and it feels good as you grind on his hard length.

"Look at you. Letting me do all the work like all the rest of them." you scoff with a smirk and at that, the doll's cock twitches a little too hard against you, almost pushing inside you.

"Wow. Someone's excited." you stare at the doll's eyes but there is nothing in there to indicate that he was in fact listening to you.

"For how much you cost, I hope this is worth it." you shrug and grip the base of his cock, guiding it inside you.

Sitting down on his length has you gasping as he fills you up perfectly, like his cock was made exactly for your pussy to take.

Your grip the doll's shoulders and use it for what you intended to when you clicked on that purchase button.

No matter how turned on you are though, staring at Hyunjin's almost expressionless face proves to be a turn off so you lean forward, wrapping your arms around his shoulders as you press your chest to his and continue bouncing on him.

Save for the fact that his hands lay limp on the side, his skin feels human and he feels kind of warm, like there was something inside the doll, warming it up.

"F-fuck." you whimper as the head of his cock brushes against the spongy spot inside you, it's like the more wet you get and the harder you fuck on him, his cock responds to you.

"R-right hand for activation." you repeat the instruction from the manual, as you blindly search for his right hand, sliding your fingertips on his wrist to his palm, your head leaned on his shoulder as you slowly gyrate your hips.

Your fingers interlace with his and it feels almost like Hyunjin grips your hand back, making you jump a little but before you can move away, his cock starts vibrating inside you.

"A-ah!" you moan loudly as your other arm curls around him, holding onto him while you fiddle with his fingers, your legs clamping around him as you start falling apart.

"G-gonna cum!" you whimper, burying your face in Hyunjin's neck and he smells so nice, feels so good as his cock keeps vibrating against your spot, bringing you to your high quickly.

The ecstasy you feel as the vibrations persist, prolonging your orgasm, overstimulating you while you ride the feeling makes you miss the single blink that Hyunjin's eyes make before returning to their original glassy and unmoving state.

"Too much." you whimper, squeezing his thumb and the vibrations stop.

You know that the left hand brings a happy end to the doll but you're not sure if you're done with it yet.

Leaning back to finally look at his face has you a little disappointed as you don't notice any kind of change on his face.

"Kinda wish you were real." you whisper, hugging the doll as you start bouncing on his hard cock again, bringing yourself easily to another orgasm.

You squeeze the doll's left hand after that, and feel spurts of warm cum shooting inside you as his cock twitches, the head bruising against your spot violently as he fills you up with copious amounts of the sticky substance.

You're pretty sure the neighbors can hear you moan as you cum again, the feeling of being filled up to the brim satisfies you and has your eyes rolling in the back of your head.

"Wow." you breathe hard, your cheek leaned on Hyunjin's shoulder as you grip his wrists while you come down.

You lean back to look at the doll again.

Were his lips slightly upturned before?

In the fogginess of your orgasms, you couldn't tell or think straight.

"Be right back." you slide off of him and make your way to the bathroom, taking a quick five minute shower before you grab a wet cloth to clean the doll up.

He sits how you left him, and you kneel between his legs to clean him up carefully.

His cock is not completely soft nor hard anymore, it's somewhere in the middle, but as you touch it gently, it seems to react and twitch again.

"You came already." you smirk and experimentally pinch the tip of Hyunjin's cock, but nothing happens except the member twitching again.

You stand up with a sigh, covering him with the blanket again before you leave for the bathroom to get ready for bed.

Just as you turn on the water to wash your mouth out, you hear something akin to a sigh coming from your living room.

You freeze, turning off the water and listening closely but you only hear the quiet buzz of the lamp above your mirror.

Maybe you were just imagining things.

You shake your head and finish your business before going back to Hyunjin.

"I'm too tired to dress you now, but boxers should be enough." you say and struggle to get him dressed, almost giving up during the process.

"I should just keep you naked in my bed to avoid the hassle." you say, lifting him up and carrying him to your bed.

"Cuddles, right? I do love me some cuddles too." you say with a tired smile as you adjust Hyunjin in your bed.

You join him under the covers and lean on your elbow as you lay sideways, staring down at him.

"How'd they make you look and feel so real?" your hand is on his cheek, and you trace his eyebrows, his nose and lips.

Fingertips travel to his ears, down to his neck and his chest.

"Don't come alive and scare me while I'm sleeping, Hyunjin." a shadow passes in his eyes as you say his name but you're too busy caressing his toned stomach to notice.

"Night." you kiss his lips before turning off the lamp and laying your head on his shoulder.

Somehow, you adjust his arms so that it seems like he's holding you and you throw your leg over his, your hand tracing patterns on his chest and side.

It was like hugging and kissing your pillow in high school, except this one took the shape of a human being.

With thoughts and questions about Hyunjin swimming in your head, you fall asleep quickly, not noticing how the doll's arms tighten around you ever so slightly.

Early in the morning as your alarm starts blaring loudly and annoyingly, you groan and stir, almost forgetting about Hyunjin being next to you.

"Oh!" you gasp. "Good morning, dolly." you say after turning the alarm off, as he stares at the ceiling.

"Sadly, I gotta go to work and leave you here alone. You better behave while I'm out." you lift a finger up menacingly, but there's a playful smile on your face.

"Man, I'm crazy." you shake your head before leaning in to leave a nice, wet smooch on Hyunjin's cheek.

"I'll come say bye before I leave."

And you do so, after eating breakfast and getting ready, you're back in your room.

"Should I put you in the living room so you can watch tv?"

The doll never answers.

"Maybe, yeah. You'll be bored lying in bed all day." you nod and carry Hyunjin to your couch.

You make him comfy, cover him with the blanket, card your fingers through his messy hair and then turn on the tv, leaving the remote in his lap.

"Gonna be late because of you." you sigh and lean down to place a kiss on the doll's lips.

"Be a good doll."

And with that you finally leave your apartment.

All day at work, you can't help but wonder if your Hyunjin doll somehow came alive, and for some reason you were looking forward to seeing him even if he didn't.

"What's got you so happy? Finally got laid?" your coworker chuckles as you stand in the office kitchen making yourself some coffee, you know she always gossips about you behind your back so you don't wanna give her the time of the day.

"Mind your business, Amanda." you answer quickly, turning to leave back to your office.

"Okay, you didn't then." she calls behind you with a giggle but you decide to ignore her.

"Fucking bitch." you mutter to yourself as you close the door.

The rest of the day goes by uneventfully and you can't wait to drive back home to Hyunjin.

"I'm home!" you yell out as soon as you step inside, hearing that the tv is still on, nothing out of the ordinary.

You make your way to your living room to find Hyunjin in the exact same position as you left him almost 9 hours ago, the remote still next to his right hand, the same channel you turned on this morning on the tv.

For some reason, your shoulders slump.

"Well, I guess you've been a good doll and took my warning literally." you shrug a little.

"Still, I want to reward you. As soon as I eat and take a nap that is." you add and go about your routine, eating lunch, taking a shower and of course changing into your comfy clothes, which at this time of the year consisted of an oversized t-shirt and panties.

"Let's take a nap together, dolly." you say to Hyunjin as you lift him up and move him to your bed again.

You lay him on his side, then mirror his position, taking his arm and wrapping it around your waist, the other comfortably under your neck.

Tracing patterns on his stomach and chest again, you start talking.

"Your life is so easy. From the couch to the bed, you don't even have to work or go anywhere. Meanwhile, I have to endure fucking Amanda every day at work. Do you have any idea how bitchy that woman is?", you talk as you cuddle your doll. "She has to know eeeeverything about eeeeeveryone. Soon, she'll crawl up my ass just to look at my insides."

You look at Hyunjin's face and for a moment it seems as if his eyes moved.

"Are you listening to me, perhaps?" you whisper, your hand on his cheek. "I know I'm probably crazy. But I'm glad I got you. Even though you're a bit creepy, you bring me comfort." you add, tucking your head into his neck.

"I'm gonna sleep now."

Slowly blinking your eyes awake, you feel warmness enveloping you that's not coming just from your blanket but from Hyunjin.

Quickly, you realize that somehow his thigh ended up pressed against your core, your leg thrown over him as you scooted closer to him in sleep.

"Oh." a little sound escapes your lips as you grind against his warm thigh, feeling wetness on your panties.

Before looking up at him, you press a kiss to his collarbone and it seems like his thigh moves against you once, making you jolt.

"Hey." you look up at him, but his eyes are unmoving as always.

You observe his face but the throbbing between your legs makes you grind against him again.

"F-feels good." you whimper, leaning in and kissing him, letting your tongue dart out and lick at the plump lips.

You feel his erection press against your other thigh, the one flush against him and you chuckle a little.

"Someone likes me a lot." you say, leaning back to look at him.

It looks like there's a small smile on his face that you swear wasn't there before.

"Hm." you squint your eyes as you stop your movements.

"Gotta try something." you declare after a moment of silence, lifting up and removing the blanket.

You push Hyunjin on his back, hooking your fingers in his boxers and pulling them off of him.

"Aw, you really do like me a lot." you smirk at the sight of the doll's cock, twitching and leaking again like it did yesterday.

"I'll give you some attention, you deserved it."

You spread his legs, adjusting them so you can kneel between his thighs and you lean down.

"I haven't done this in a while. You can't complain though." you chuckle a little as you grip his cock and let your tongue dart out, catching the sweet tasting precum with it.

You don't understand how he tastes so sweet, it's hard to put your finger on what exactly the taste is but it makes you want more so you swirl your tongue around his head, your moans muffled as you swallow the sweet liquid.

"Mm. Fuck you taste good." you whine and put your lips around him again, slowly taking more of him in as you bob your head up and down.

Sucking cock like that is not your favorite thing to do, sometimes it makes you feel uncomfortable but having Hyunjin be so still and so tasty has your arousal pooling on your panties and you keep wanting more.

You take as much as you can, coating his cock in your saliva, your tongue pressing along his vein as you fondle his balls has him twitching inside you.

You smirk and grip his left hand, spurts of hot cum hitting your throat and it tastes even sweeter than before as you whimper and swallow everything.

"Damn hot." you whine, quickly getting rid of your shirt and panties, before you take his now completely wet cock in your hand and start jerking him off to make him hard for you again.

It doesn't take long to excite the doll and you decide to turn your back to him and fuck on his cock like that so that you don't have to look into his lifeless eyes while pleasing yourself.

You sit on him and push his cock inside yourself, your warm cunt engulfing his entire length easily.

"Mm." you gyrate your hips as you close your eyes and enjoy teasing yourself, your wet pussy coating his navel and balls.

"God, you're perfect Hyunjin." you whine and start fucking on him.

In the deep throes of passion as you bounce on him, your nails digging into his thighs for support, your eyes closed in pure bliss, you don't notice anything.

You don't notice Hyunjin blinking, his lips opening to speak but nothing comes out.

He can't move no matter how hard he tries and once again his eyes go back to the glassy state they're always in.

"Gonna cum." you whine loudly, gripping his right hand and he starts vibrating inside you, pushing you over the edge and making you scream as you squirt all over him.

"Fuck." you whine as your eyes focus, noticing you have left red marks in his thighs.

"Oh. Did I hurt you?" you gasp, your fingertips gently running over the marks.

"Didn't mean to." you look back at him but he lays still.

His cock twitches inside you and you grip his left hand, making the doll fill you up as you slowly ride him.

You lift up slowly, his cum sliding down your inner thigh together with your release.

"Made a mess of you, dolly." you look at the state of him.

"Maybe a bath?" he doesn't answer but still you prepare a bath and place him in it, careful of the usb opening on his neck.

You get inside after him, settling between his legs and leaning your back on his chest.

"Why are you so warm, Hyunjin?" you caress his arm as you hold it, his other one thrown over your stomach.

Sighing, you lean on his shoulder and close your eyes, trying to relax in the warm water, as Hyunjin 'held' you.

You still couldn't understand how they made him, but you were willing not to think about that, as he brought you a kind of comfort you didn't expect, making you wanna indulge in that feeling for as long as you could.

It's been exactly two months since you've gotten your Hyunjin doll, and ever since then you've loved spending every day with him.

You talked to him like he was alive, you watched movies with him, you read him books, you slept next to him every single night, you brought him to the kitchen so he can watch you cook, you even took him on late night drives sometimes, feeling bad that he was locked up in the apartment all day.

Sometimes, you thought you saw a flicker in his eyes, a slight smile on his face, or his fingers twitching against his thighs.

Some nights, while you're half asleep, you could swear that he tightened his hold on you or his chest lifted up and down like he was breathing.

Some days, as you'd come home from work you found him in a slightly different position than you left him.

One time, you sat him next to the window so you could watch rain together, and when you came back from making some tea, there was a heart shape in the fog on the glass.

"Did you do this dolly?" you caress his hair and look at him closely but he doesn't react.

You sigh, tracing another heart next to the first one before you sit in his lap, bringing the warm cup to your lips and observing him.

You thought you were going crazy in the beginning but as time passed by, you were becoming sure that there was more to Hyunjin than you initially knew.

"Just say something if you can hear me. Or squeeze my hand." you try for the nth time as you sit on your couch with Hyunjin but nothing happens.

"Fine." you huff. "Maybe you want something first. What would you like? I bought you new clothes. Maybe you want something else like... like something to do with art? We can paint together, if you'd like."

Hyunjin doesn't answer.

Nevertheless, you bring your art supplies and a bottle of wine.

You make yourself comfortable on the floor, next to Hyunjin's legs as he sits on the couch.

You end up being the one painting and drinking, Hyunjin's eyes move to look down at you, the look in his eyes softens, unlike the glassy one he always has.

He wants to talk, he wants to lean over and caress your hair, he wants to taste the wine off of your lips and feel the paintbrush between his fingertips.

But he can't. His eyes become glassy again as your phone rings, jolting you out of your peaceful activity.

It's your mother.

The conversation starts as always and it escalates into a fight of when are you settling down, why aren't you married, why are you closing yourself off, why are you such a failure?

As soon as you hang up a sob escapes your lips and you fall into Hyunjin, seeking comfort as you wrap your limbs around him, your face buried in his neck and your hot tears sliding down from your cheeks to his shirt, soaking it up.

"No one would understand." you cry. "They'd say I'm crazy and maybe I am. But I don't give a fuck."

Your body trembles against Hyunjin as you hiccup and sniffle, your arms wrapped tightly around his waist, your leg thrown over his thighs.

His body seems warmer than before and you squeeze him a little.

"Maybe I'm fucking crazy for loving a doll. But I love you Hyunjin." you sigh, closing your eyes as you lean against him.

His eyelids flutter a few times. He blinks.

A deep breath through his nose and you almost miss the way his chest moves up.

You place your hand on his chest, and feel it.

A heart beat slowly forming, at first almost too slow to be normal until it becomes steady and then speeds up.

He's breathing, his lips are dry as he licks at them, his hands clutch onto you and you scream.

You jump up quickly, your eyes wide as you look at him.

Hyunjin looks back up at you, his eyes wide and filled with fear and shock, mirroring yours.

He opens his mouth and a series of coughs escape his lips.

"Wh- How? Am I hallucinating?"

"Y- y/n." is the first thing he says, weakly and quietly as he reaches out for you.

You stay still as a statue, not sure what the hell is happening before your eyes.

"P-please, don't be scared." he begs as he tries to get up but his legs give out and he falls to the floor with a thud.

"Ugh." he whimpers, his hands grabbing at the coffee table.

You're slow to react to him falling from the shock of it all, making your way back to him cautiously.

"Did you hurt yourself?" you ask quietly.

"N-no, I don't think so." he says as he looks up at you.

"Who- who are you?" you don't know what else to ask, because the doll you used and played with was now a human with a heartbeat and he was looking at you, even knew your name.

"What do you mean? I'm- I'm Hyunjin, your romantic doll." he answers like it's the most normal thing ever.

"How are you alive? Why now all of a sudden? I don't get it." you say as he sits back on his legs.

"You... You love me. Your love brought me to life." he swallows, his cheeks rosy.

"Oh... There was nothing about this in the manual." The fucking manual. The doll's actual purpose. Everything you ever did to him. Embarassment washes over you and you feel absolutely mortified.

"Do you... did you hear me all this time? And um, see and feel what I was doing?"

"Y-yeah." he nods, his cheeks becoming even more red.

"Fucking hell." you whine, covering your face with your hands as you sit on the couch.

"Hey, it's okay. I- I was made for that." he says, his hand on your knee in an attempt to comfort you.

You peek at him through your fingers.

"And you were so nice to me. So... warm and loving. You made me feel so good. You never mistreated me even when you knew very well you could do whatever you want with me. I'm thankful for that. And I- I love you too, y/n." Hyunjin talks, his thumb gently caressing your skin.

"Are you programmed to say stuff like that? Are you a robot?"

He chuckles.

"I'm not programmed and I'm not a robot. Didn't you feel my heart beating?"

"I did but... I don't understand. How were you made?" you finally remove your hands from your face.

"I don't know. I wish I could answer your questions but I'm as clueless as you are. I just know I was conscious the whole time while I was with you but I couldn't speak or move. Like I was paralyzed. It was horrible. I tried giving you signs, I tried to talk multiple times but it's like something would hold me back, like there was a wall and I couldn't break through."

"That does sound horrible. I'm sorry if I ever did something you wouldn't agree to." you say quietly, your face burning in embarassment.

"No, no, I liked everything you did." he says with a sheepish smile, averting his eyes. "Wish I could reciprocate." he looks up at you through his lashes.

You're biting on your lip nervously, his hand reaches for you and you accidentally snatch yours away, not used to your doll talking to you and trying to touch you.

"A-are you gonna abandon me now?" he asks quietly as he eyes your hand.

"What?" you look back at him to see that his eyes are watery and you gasp. "No, of course not! I always wished you'd come to life. Didn't think it would actually happen so I'm still processing and hoping that I'm not dreaming."

"Oh, thank god." he exhales and you let him grab your hand. "I- uhm... I'm very hungry and thirsty. Could you help me with that?"

"Oh! Of course! I will make some dinner for us." you say and help him sit up on the couch, noticing that now he's heavier than he used to be.

"I guess I still need to get feeling in my legs and arms." he says as you bring him a glass of water.

"Mhm, probably you need to have blood pumping properly through your body. Don't worry." you pet his hair as he drinks and he looks at you.

"Here, you'll be warm like this." you wrap him up in your fluffy blanket and notice a change on the back of his neck.

"Oh!" you exclaim, your fingertips touching the skin there, making Hyunjin shiver a little.

"The usb opening is gone." you declare and he brings his hand to touch it, your fingertips grazing against each other.

"That's weird." he says absentmindedly.

"All of this is weird." you chuckle and he chuckles with you, making you look at him.

God, he's even more beautiful with a smile gracing his face, you think to yourself.

Without thinking your hands gently cup his cheeks.

"You're really alive." you whisper, your thumbs gently stroking his face, his eyes flutter as he pushes into your hands.

"I am. Does that make you happy?" he asks with a sparkle in his eyes.

"Very happy." you nod with a smile, leaning closer to him.

"Good. I want to make you happy. When you're happy, I'm happy too."

"Hyunjinnie." you whine against his lips and kiss him gently.

Having him kiss back as he clutches at your shirt is the sweetest thing ever, you think as you wrap your arms around his shoulders.

"Okay, I don't want you to starve now that you came to life." you lean back with a chuckle as he chases your lips.

"Yeah, please, I need food." he nods and you make your way to the kitchen, whipping up a quick dinner, checking constantly if he's okay.

You bring two plates as soon as you're done and Hyunjin's eyes seem to get bigger as soon as they land on the food.

"Be careful, it's still hot." you warn him.

"Okay." Hyunjin nods.

He eats happily, asking for more which you of course bring to him.

"Are you feeling better?" you ask when the two of you finish eating.

"Yes, much better. But I feel very tired now."

"You need sleep. Let's go to bed. Do you think you can walk now?"

"I think so." you grab his arm and help him become steady on his feet.

You lead him to the bathroom and he looks at you.

"Now that you're alive, you need to brush your teeth and wash up before bed."

"Right." he nods.

After a whole ordeal of getting ready, you finally plop down under the covers.

"Can I- Can I hold you?" Hyunjin asks sweetly and you chuckle, rolling your body into his.

"Of course."

"Always wanted to do that." his limbs wrap around you as he holds you tightly, your face buried in his chest.

"Good night, Hyunjin. Please be there when I wake up." you nuzzle into him, inhaling the familiar fresh and flowery scent of him.

"I promise I will. Good night, y/n."

It wasn't a dream.

Your eyes flutter open and Hyunjin smiles at you fondly, his hand gently caressing your cheek.

"Morning, dol- Hyunjin."

"You can call me dolly if that's what you like." he smirks and you chuckle.

"Eh, well you're human now. It feels like I'm degrading you." you gently touch his chest.

"I don't mind." he shifts and you feel his erection press against your thigh.

You gasp a little, your core throbbing with want.

"I'm sorry." his face is red instantly. "It's just- when you touch me... I can't help it."

"It's okay, Hyunjinnie." you slide your hand down to cup him through his boxers.

He whimpers, leaning into you, his eyes fluttering shut and you press your lips on his in a heated kiss.

His tongue licks at your lower lip and you let him in, eager to finally feel his kisses how you craved to.

Hyunjin kisses you messily and hungrily, grinding into your hand, grunting against your lips.

As soon as you slide off his boxers, automatically your hands lift up to push him on his back but he grabs your wrists gently to stop you.

"My sweet girl, let me take care of you how you deserve now that I'm able to." he rasps, his eyes hooded as he looks at you with lust.

"O-okay." you whisper and lay down on your back, letting Hyunjin slide your panties off as you pull off your shirt and toss it somewhere aside.

"I've spent so much time receiving. I want to give, my angel. My hands hurt when I couldn't touch you and make you feel good. That's all I want to do." he sounds desperate as his lips attach to your neck, leaving wet kisses on your skin, his hands roaming on your body and settling on your breasts.

"Mm, make me feel good, Jinnie." you whimper as he squeezes your breasts, massaging them and moaning against your skin like it was more pleasurable to him than to you.

He mumbles sweet praises as he leaves more kisses that lead to your nipple, his tongue darting out to swirl around it, making you arch into him.

His eyes are dark as he wraps his lips around it and starts sucking, his other hand sliding down to grip your inner thigh.

Fingertips ghost on your skin, both his hands now spreading your legs apart.

"Do you know how much I longed to taste your sweet nectar? Will you let me drink from you, my angel?" Hyunjin asks, his finger gently pressing into your clit, circling it.

"Yes, please, oh my god." you whimper, your hips lifting up into his touch.

He smirks, trailing kisses down to your core.

He stops for a moment to admire you and you don't even have time to feel self-conscious as he spreads your pussy lips apart and leans in to stick his tongue inside you.

"F-fuck!" you jolt as he starts moving it before he leans back a little and licks at your sensitive clit.

"Taste even sweeter than I imagined." he moans, his lips wrapping around your clit as he sucks on it, his thumbs gently caressing your pussy lips.

"H-H-Hyunjin!" you whimper as he sucks harder, your hips lifting up in pleasure.

"Could be here for hours. Eating this sweet pussy out." he moans, pushing his tongue inside you again, this time fucking you faster, his nose giving the perfect pressure on your sensitive nub and driving you crazy.

Your hand grips his hair, pushing him more into you as he skilfully moves his tongue, his lips pressing into your lower ones as he makes out with you.

Your orgasm washes over you quickly, coating Hyunjin's face and he laps it all up greedily, his eyes shut as he whimpers into you, sending vibrations right into your core.

You feel crazy with desire the more he continues eating you out like a man starved and you have to grip his hair and pull him away after he gives you two more orgasms.

"H-Hyune, please, I need your cock." you whimper, feeling like you're falling apart.

He licks at his red lips, his eyes crazed with lust he feels for you.

"Anything my angel needs." his voice is husky as he leans over you, the tip of his cock pressed against your wet, messy cunt.

He pushes in with ease, after all, you've been fucking on him for the last two months, your pussy was used to the stretch.

"Mm, Hyunjin!" that doesn't make it feel less pleasurable when he fills you up, the tip of his cock kissing your cervix.

"Move, please." you whimper, already feeling out of it.

Hyunjin grips your thighs and starts fucking you at a steady pace, his cock dragging against your walls deliciously, sliding easily through your wetness.

"Feel so good. So warm. Just for me." he whimpers, his eyes fluttering shut before they open again and look down where his cock disappears inside you.

"Just for you, Jinnie." you moan and he looks up at you, a smile on his face.

He leans closer to you, wrapping his arms around you and in turn you wrap yours around his shoulders, bringing your bodies flush together as he buries himself deep inside your heat.

He ruts into you desperately, your lips meeting in messy kisses, spit dribbles down your chin and he licks at it, kissing your jaw and your neck wetly.

"P-please tell me you love me." he whimpers in your ear, holding you tightly as he fucks you harder, only taking a little bit of his length out and shoving it back in with force that has your mind spinning.

"I love you, Hyunjin. I love you. So much." you cry happy tears, making him cry too as you clutch onto each other.

"My angel, I love you more than anything." he says as he kisses you, his tongue playing with yours.

He brings you to another orgasm, his fingers on your nipples, pinching and pulling as he keeps rutting into you desperately.

"C-can I cum?" he whimpers, his hands gripping desperately at your waist.

"Yeah." you nod quickly and he gives you his left hand to squeeze and as your fingers entwine, he cums, filling you up endlessly, more than when he was just doll and you whimper as your legs clamp around him, lifting your middle into him and cumming with him again.

Both of you breathe hard as he stays inside you for a moment, before pulling out and watching his cum drip out of you.

"D-do I still have to squeeze your left hand for you to cum?" you chuckle a little.

"No, just... force of habit, I guess." he says sheepishly like he didn't just fuck your brains out.

"What about the vibrations?"

"You really liked that, didn't you?" he smirks, his hand sliding up your thigh tentatively, before his fingers slide between your folds, playing with the wetness.

"Shut up." you say embarassingly, swatting his hand away.

"Don't worry, I can vibrate if you want." he bites on his lip as he looks at you.

"I'm too sensitive now." you whisper and he chuckles.

"I know. Usually you don't go above four, five orgasms in one sitting. Maybe six if you're extra horny."

"It's embarassing to me that you know this in such detail." your face becomes red as Hyunjin chuckles, shaking his head.

"Nothing you should be embarassed about. I'm happy to please you." he says and leans down to kiss you gently.

You pull him into your embrace, hoping that from now on, he stays human, and keeps loving you because in this moment you can't imagine your life without Hyunjin in it.

"Thank you for letting me use your painting supplies." Hyunjin smiles up at you as he sits on the floor of your living room, like you always did when you painted.

"Don't thank me, Jinnie. What's mine is yours." you smile as you sit next to him and lean in closer.

"Let me see." you say as he looks down sheepishly.

He pushes the sketchbook towards you and you gasp.

"Hyunjin, this is amazing! How did you manage to paint so well?! And you painted me! That's so sweet."

"I- I don't know. As I started, it's like I got déjà vu, like I already did this before and many times so."

"Really? That's peculiar." you say.

"Maybe we should call the company I got you from." you add, tapping your chin.

"P-please don't!" Hyunjin panics, gripping at your thigh. "I'm scared. I don't know why but when I try to think of that place, it feels bad. Please don't call them. I don't want them to take me away from you."

"Hey, hey, it's okay. No one will take you away from me. I won't call them." you quickly grab his face to calm him down.

"You promise?" his pupils shake as he looks at you.

"I promise." you nod and kiss him sweetly to let him know he can trust you.

Hyunjin visibly relaxes with your touch, wrapping his arms around you and tucking his face in your neck.

"Um... could we go outside? We only ever went on night drives which is understandable but now that I can walk and stuff, we could go out on real dates and maybe visit museums?" he looks up at you with a smile.

"Of course! Anywhere you want to go." you smile back at him, and he leans up to kiss you.

For the next several weeks, you take Hyunjin everywhere.

To the park, the movies, museums, to a club, to different restaurants, to a mall, anything that comes to your mind, the two of you decide to visit, even going to a little town nearby for a day trip.

You don't remember the last time you were this happy and had someone next to you who made everything look so easy and sweet.

Hyunjin had taken an interest in capturing all the pretty moments so you got him a camera, deciding to surprise him for your 6 month anniversary.

As you came home from work, you called out to him but there was no answer.

"Jinnie? Are you sleeping?" you pushed the bedroom door open but the bed was vacant.

A heavy feeling settled in the pit of your stomach as you searched your entire apartment and couldn't find him.

Frantically, you looked for him again, knowing that he didn't suddenly become Barbie sized and hid somewhere.

He was gone.

You ran out of your apartment to knock on your neighbor's door.

"Tony! Did you see Hyunjin today maybe?" you asked him as soon as he opened the door.

"No, I didn't, sorry." he shook his head.

You didn't know what to do so you went back to your apartment and burst into tears.

Hyunjin didn't have a phone you could contact him with as he never had the need to use one so you had no way of reaching him.

All you could do was sit and wait, biting your nails as every single scenario runs through your mind.

He will come back, you reassure yourself as you fall asleep from exhaustion.

And he does, around 10pm the door clicks open and you jolt up from your nap on the couch.

"Hyunjin?" you say into the dark space and he turns on the light, standing in the middle of your living room with two gift bags in his hand and an apologetic look on his face.

"Oh my god, Hyunjin!" you jump to your feet, running to him and throwing your arms around him, squeezing him tightly and almost knocking him down as the bags fall out of his hands and he wraps his arms around your waist.

"I'm so sorry, y/n. I should've left you a note. I-I went out to get a gift for our anniversary tommorow."

"Please, don't ever disappear like that again. Do you have any idea how scared I was?" you cry and Hyunjin gasps, his hands on your face as he wipes away your tears.

"I'm really sorry. I will never ever do something like this again." his eyes water too.

"I should get you a phone." you shake your head. "Hey, how did you even manage to buy a gift? You don't have any money." you chuckle, wiping at your cheeks.

"I went to the park and painted portraits of people for money, then got the gift."

"Oh, Jinnie, you sweet fool. Just don't give me any more scares."

"I promise I won't." he nods and your lips seal in a kiss.

Despite having so many options to choose from now, Hyunjin and you decide to have a nice dinner at home for your anniversary, where it all started.

You even took out the most expensive plates and silverware you owned, adding some candles to create a more intimate atmosphere, some light romantic music playing in the background.

"Y/n, I um- got you something I'd like to see you wear tonight for me."

"Oh, you did?" you smirk. "Show it to me."

Hyunjin grabs one of the gift bags and reaches it to you with an excited smile.

You chuckle and peek inside, seeing that he got you black and red lacy lingerie as well as a dress.

"Do you like it?" he asks.

"Very much so." you take out the dress and touch the silky material. "This dress is very revealing." you notice the opened back and the deep neck line that would definitely almost make your breasts fall out.

"I was counting on the fact that we celebrate here because you in that dress is for my eyes only." his eyes darken suddenly.

"Oh yeah? Let me get ready for our dinner then." you chuckle and make your way to the bathroom.

Hyunjin decides to wear the clothes he arrived in, since those were the only fancy clothing items he owned, and he thought it was kind of symbolic to put them on tonight.

You walk into your bedroom to find Hyunjin dressed and staring at the big box he was packed in, one you still didn't get rid of.

"Jinnie?" you call out as he seems to be deep in thought.

"You kept the box." he says, still looking at it.

"I did. I had no idea what I was getting into so I left it just in case. I was gonna throw it out, it's just really heavy." you explain, making your way to him.

"When you arrived, two men had to carry the box in, and somehow the box seemed heavier than you. I barely managed to get it into the closet. Had to push it and stuff. Sorry I didn't have the chance to get rid of it."

"It's okay, y/n. You don't have to apologize." he smiles as he turns towards you.

"Oh." a gasp leaves his lips as he sees you all dressed up for him.

"You like?" you smirk, winking at him.

"Mhm." he nods quickly. "You look stunning, my angel."

"Thank you, Jinnie. You look handsome."

His cheeks seem to become more red with the praise as he mutters, his eyes darting left and right.

You enjoy your dinner together, romantic music playing in the background, the tv mute, left on just from the habit of it.

After you finish eating, you migrate to the couch to cuddle and drink wine, some stupid show playing on the screen and the two of you jokingly read from the character's lips, making up nonsensical conversations and laughing.

After some time and some more wine, Hyunjin becomes even more handsy than usual, grabbing at your thighs, sliding his hands on the silky material of the dress.

You melt into him, kissing him as your arms wrap around his shoulders, your tongues languidly massaging each other as your core throbs with need.

Hyunjin caresses you gently, his hands worshipping you, sliding down your throat, to your collarbone, to the swell of your breasts, down to your stomach and waist, landing on your hips.

His lips attach to your neck as he leaves wet kisses on your skin, licking at it and sinking his teeth in.

"Mm." you moan, playing with his hair as he kisses your collarbone and the flesh of your breast, leaving another love bite on the soft skin.

His hands travel under your dress, roaming around on your legs and your eyes open, landing on the tv, making you gasp.

"Hyunjin, that's you!" you jolt, pointing at the screen.

"Huh?" he mumbles, already drunk on you.

You quickly grab the remote and turn on the sound.

"...seemingly the dolls have some kind of malfunction that the company does not wish to reveal to the public. All eight of the purchased dolls are required to be returned and the buyers will get their money back, guaranteed. The customers will be contacted accordingly..."

"M-my friends. I vaguely remember them." Hyunjin breathes quickly, you can see that he's getting upset quickly. "They wanna take me away from you."

"I won't let them." you quickly shake your head.

"What are we gonna do?" he asks, clenching his fists and you gently grab his hands, trying to soothe him.

"We're gonna... leave."

"Leave?"

"Yeah, I have a house my aunt left me up in the mountains. I don't think they can find us there. For now, until we think of where to go next." you start planning immediately.

There was no way you would let anyone take Hyunjin away from you.

"But, what about your job? And your things?" Hyunjin bites on his lip.

"I don't care. All I care about right now is making sure you're safe." you smile at him, your hand coming up to caress his cheek.

Hyunjin smiles, leaning into your touch and wrapping his arms around you.

"Thank you." he whispers into your hair.

You get a call from an unknown number the next day, but one quick google search tells you it's the company Hyunjin came from.

You packed one bag of a few essential things you'd need, leaving most of your belongings behind.

"Y/n! There's a black van posted outside. It's been there for hours. They're looking at the building right now." Hyunjin announces and you make your way to the window, half hiding behind him.

"We need to use the fire exit." you declare and Hyunjin nods as he turns to you.

"I won't let them take you. I promise." you hold his hands.

"I trust you, my angel." he smiles and you kiss him gently before the two of you exit the building, quickly entering your car.

You step on the gas, and reach out to hold Hyunjin's hand in yours.

As you speed off into the sunset, hoping for a better tomorrow, a black van rounds the corner, following you from afar...

✨Taglist: @moonchild9350 @janepg @velvetmoonlght @hwanghyunjinismybae @jehhskz @porangporangmeong @laylasbunbunny @laughatdanger @jeonginslefthand @sapphirewaves @simpforleeknaur @s3ungm1nxxl0ve @lixies-favorite-cookie

[yourstrulyrani]

Hi luv!

I am new to Simon Riley but I am DOWN BAD lmao

Could u please write something about mommy reade being insecure and struggling with like body image after pregnancy and during post-partum. Like being a REAL MAN he is, he just adores his mama and loves how her body changed and created their baby.

U can totally change it however u like, i am bad at explaining 😭😭

I absolutely loved ur last dad!Simon imagine, I could never 😭

Keep it up 🫶🏻🫶🏻

dad!simon riley x mom!reader

blurb: dad!simon soothes your insecurities about your postpartum body. cw&tws: body image/weight, suggestive right at the end // wc: 1279

a/n: aw hii you’re so kind, thank you! & don’t worry you explained it perfectly and i am so in love with this idea so here it is, thank you for your kind words btw 🥹🫶🏼 i want to bring attention to anyone reading who needs to hear it, that no matter your weight or how your body looks: you’re enough. your looks are not “hideous” or anything else along those lines just because society tells you otherwise. in no way do i have the intention of promoting body negativity/shaming. every body is a body worthy of love and respect as long as you treat others the same. please take care of yourselves & love yourselves as much as possible 🤍.

With the spare time you have now as your baby is asleep in her nursery, you take off your tank top, now clad in only a nursing bra and your underwear.

You step in front of the mirror. You thought your heart sunk enough when you saw the number on the scale, but you were wrong. You run your hands along your stomach. The skin is still saggy from the pregnancy and birth, and the stretch marks from your pregnancy that were once faint now boldly start at your hips and vine their way to your belly button. At this point, you let the tears fall. You want the body you had before pregnancy. You want the body where you could see where your waist ended and your hips started. You want the body where your breasts don't have stretch marks. You want the number you had on the scale from before. You don’t even recognize yourself.

You think: How did I let myself go this much?

You break down on the wooden floor of the bedroom, the hot tears falling on the cold floor.

“Sweetheart?” His voice calls out to you.

You forgot he was home too.

You look up through your tears, a blurry image but enough to know it's your husband at the doorway of your shared bedroom. Simon doesn’t hesitate to walk over and sit down with you on the floor, placing his hands on your cheeks and rubbing your tears off with his thumbs. “Baby.”

Your eyes shut, letting more tears fall at the pressure. You can’t look at him. You can’t be with him. Your body isn’t enough. Enough for you. Enough for him. “Baby, look at me.” His voice tightens along with his hands on your face.

You whimper in pain, “No.”

His hands move from your cheeks to your elbows, lifting you up gently. “Here, let’s get you up on the bed.” You have been recently so happy with the arrival of your baby, Simon too. It pains him to see you like this. “What’s wrong? Talk to me.” He pleads gently until you finally open your eyes.

As soon as you sit on the bed and your bloodshot eyes weakly gaze at him, his chest tightens. Your breathing is labored yet you manage to get out a few words, “My body, Simon.” You wrap your stomach around your arms, clutching at the body that’s giving you trouble. “It’s so ugly. I’m sorry.” You hiccup, the crying making it harder to breathe. “My stretch marks, my belly, my swollen legs and feet. Everything. I’m sorry I’m not as pretty as before.”

“You don’t think you’re pretty?”

“I’m hideous, Si.”

Simon’s ears rang when you called yourself that word: Hideous. His gorgeous, dedicated, sweet wife. The mother to their baby, the love and light of his life, and here she is talking about herself like this.

“Stand up for me, sweetheart.” Simon grabs your hands and you reluctantly do as he says. He tugs at your bra, “Can I take this off?”

“But the doctor said no sex for six wee—“

“I know, baby. Don’t worry. Not planning on that right now. You need to heal." Your nod of permission makes him unclasp your bra. He cups your cheek and places a kiss on your forehead before guiding you by the shoulders to the mirror. Here you are, again, facing the woman you can’t stand.

Simon stands behind you, his chin resting on your shoulder and his hands on your arms. “You’re so beautiful.” He kisses your neck, the touch of affection featherlight but heavy with love.

Simon’s hands move down to your breasts, cupping one in each hand. His hands are big enough to let his thumbs trace over the stretch marks on them. “These stretch marks are normal and perfect. Your body grew selflessly for our girl and this shows it.” His eyes gaze into yours through the mirror. “I don’t think your stretch marks are hideous. I think they’re a physical sign of your strength.” His hands give your breasts a final rub, then move on to rub the stretch marks across your hips and stomach. You turn your head to the side, disgusted at looking at yourself for any longer.

Your husband clicks his tongue. “Look, baby. Please. Right there in the mirror. Look for me.” Simon glides his hands along your stomach. He squeezes gently, enough to feel the softness without hurting you. You turn your head back to face the mirror, and Simon gives you a warm smile through the mirror. You look at your body, analyzing every inch. The stretch marks you once saw as something that should be disgusted over, you now see them as a physical witness to your pregnancy. You start to think they're not so bad.

His hands circled all around your stomach. “And your belly you said? Here is where you carried our baby. You let her grow here. Your stomach is not hideous. It changed beautifully. It’s softer than before and I love it. I love feeling it. I love looking at it.” He keeps reassuring you in your ear and you can't help but to shiver. You always loved Simon's voice, but the combination of it and his honest reassurances does something else to you.

You slowly start to feel better, but your doubts still rise about how Simon feels. “But I don’t feel pretty enough for you. I’ve changed so much after this pregnancy.”

“You are always pretty enough for me. You are always beautiful. You’re perfect, mama. Your body changed because you got pregnant and that’s normal. I’m not disgusted. If anything I am in awe of you and your body’s ability.”

Simon walks around to stand in front of you now, making you look up at him by lifting your chin up with his finger. His head lowers to kiss your forehead, his lips kissing their way down to your cheek, and lastly to your neck. “Believe me when I say your body has changed in the best way possible, my love. Every inch. Every stretch mark and curve. It’s all beauty to me. You are beauty to me. Love yourself, please.”

Your eyes tear up. Not because you hate your body anymore, but now realizing just how much you should love it and how much the man you love loves it. "I love you," you whisper. Both of you look into each other's eyes, none of you denying the amount of love in each pair.

"I love you too, mama." Simon brings you into an embrace, wrapping his forearms around your upper back. His face finds the crook of your neck, his lips grazing your most sensitive spot as he speaks. "My beautiful woman. Just a few more weeks and I'll prove it to you just how beautiful you are." He softly kisses your neck, thinking about how fortunate he is to have a woman who loves him like you do.

You giggle and cross your arms playfully, “How so?” You know exactly what he means, but it wouldn't hurt to hear it out loud.

Simon chuckles before moving his head away from your neck to look down at your face. He admires every slope. He loves the way your eyelashes compliment your eyes, the way your lip color is the perfect shade to kiss, and your cheeks soft enough to hold in his hands. He does the latter, his words laced with suppressed desire as he whispers, “The same way I got you knocked up.”

You think: How did I get so lucky?

(brb gonna go cry UGH i need a man to praise me like he's doing RIGHT NOW.)

~ yours truly, rani ♥︎

[jakesimfromstatefarm]

super super random but I was rewatching wall-e today (as one does) and omg why is no doubt jake so wall-e coded 😭😭 the entire movie i could not stop thinking abt no doubt jake they're just so puppy like following yn / eve around and doing anything to impress them and put a smile on their face like pls tell me im not crazy and that you see it too 😭

oh my GOD ANON WAIT this is SO CUTE I NEVER EVEN THOUGHT ABT IT THEY'RE SOOOOO WALL E x EVE CODED you're 100% right im freaking out. also thanks to you i'm literally watching wall-e as i type this up...and tell me why i never realized how FUNNY it is and how DOWNBAD wall-e is??? i wasn't planning on making this an entire offiicial post but now im watching this movie and getting inspired LOLLL wall-e is just so damn cute </3

──── JAKE & YN x WALL-E & EVE <3 ↳ requested // headcanon // part of the no doubt series !

EVERY TIME YOU SAY HIS NAME:

you know that scene where wall-e literally melts in adoration when eve says his name for the first time?

oh yeah.

that's no doubt!jake. 100%.

everytime you say his name is like music to his ears. might as well be the sounds of heaven's gates opening for the first time.

you say jake, and suddenly he's smiling like a lovesick dummy.

you say jake, and he just internally melts. completely liquifies.

you say jake, and his back straightens like a little soldier ready to serve.

and you know it too.

you know the effect on him—hence why you never call him by any pet names or nicknames like he does with you. his name alone is enough to get him twisted all around your finger.

and don't even get me started for when you say his full government name.

the second sim jaeyun slips from your mouth, or any other variation—like jaeyunnie, yunie, etc—

yup.

he passes out.

heart emojis flying out of his ears and all.

KEEPS EVERY LITTLE TRINKET:

wall-e collecting random little treasures and does a lil show & tell to impress eve?

no doubt!jake has an entire box dedicated to you.

he keeps everything you've ever given him.

the movie ticket stub from one of your first dates? it's laminated.

the note you wrote him on a sticky note when you made him lunch to bring to the studio one day? it's folded and tucked into his wallet.

he made a scrapbook of screenshots from your text convos from before you started dating. entirely unprompted. it's called 'the beginning of us'

you found a heart-shaped rock once on a picnic date.

it still sits on his desk.

to this day.

LOVES TO JUST WATCH & OBSERVE YOU:

the scene where wall-e follows eve around and just watches her do her work and he's practically in love???

OH that's SOOO no doubt!jake coded.

he LOVES to watch you do anything.

and i mean ANYTHING.

doing the dishes? he sits on a bar stool at the kitchen island, cheek resting in palm, eyes glazed over like a complete loser in love.

(because he is one)

doing homework? he's on your bed, way too invested in the way your eyes blink twice in a row whenever you're confused, or the way you bite your lip in concentration.

doing your makeup?

'jakey, you're staring again.'

'can't help it, baby, you look too good.'

BUYS YOU EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING, EVEN WITHOUT ASKING:

when you go grocery shopping, no doubt!jake just simply follows behind you.

anytime you pick up any snack or drink you seem slightly bit interested in but end up putting back, jake quietly puts it in the shopping cart without saying anything.

you pick up a drink. read the label. hum in curiosity.

then you...put it back?

jake notices.

jake retrieves.

jake puts it in the cart.

your eyes linger too long at the new snack display?

boom.

into the cart it goes.

cut to when you guys get to check out, you turn around and—

the cart is full.

'jake.'

'what.'

'we don't need all these snacks.'

'yeah, but i know you want them. don't worry. groceries on me this week.'

'you say that every week.'

WHEN YOU'RE UPSET OR MAD:

like when eve shuts down completely and wall-e's trying his best to take care of her? umbrella, sunblock, literally guarding her with his entire being?

no doubt!jake makes sure you're 100% taken care of, even when you're not in the best mood.

he will sit quietly beside you like a sad puppy, offering snacks, cuddles, drinks, forehead kisses—anything

'i brought you a blanket. it's the soft one. you like the soft one, right? should i heat it up in the dryer? i can heat it up in the dryer—'

he just wants you to be okay.

even if you're upset at him—

he doesn't even care if you can't forgive him just yet.

he just wants to make sure you're okay.

DOES THE LITTLEST THINGS IN HOPES OF IMPRESSING YOU:

no doubt!jake would wake up extra early to buy your favorite drink at the local cafe near the apartment.

and of course—he memorized your order.

iced peach latte, 70% sugar, less ice, plastic straws only. no exceptions.

he's had it down since week two of dating you.

and hasn't messed it up once.

even when he has to leave for the studio before you're up—

you wake up to your drink in the fridge, a sticky note attached to the lid:

'rise & shine, pretty <3 i love you more than you love your iced peach lattes.'

no doubt!jake builds random creations out of whatever lego set the two of you just finished building together.

you're probably cleaning up, tossing the leftover pieces into the box when suddenly—

'baby, baby, look!'

both his hands are holding up a little...

spaceship?

duck?

a lopsided house?

you lift a brow.

then, you look past the lump in his hands and at his beaming, proud, face and—

'i love it, jakey. you're so creative.'

he falls asleep with the mutant duck-ship-house on the nightstand next to his side of the bed.

with a smile on his face.

no doubt m. list

tag list! pt. 1 (open)

@bluxjun @ki2rins @why-did-i-just-do-this @favoritten @lovialymisc @xylatox @vivimura @leehsngs @puma-riki @lezzleeferguson-120 @enhaprettystars @laurradoesloveu @sievenderz @somuchdard @kristynaah @hinryh @ltfirecracker @lov4hoon @taeheexx @niyzu @chunkzdeluluwife @jakeflvrz @fangirl125reader @0429jw @dreamy-carat @yuons @thestarinstarbucks @miszes @llearlert @ppeachyttae @hoomin10 @teddybeartaetae @tanisha2060 @therealmrsbahng @beomgyu-bears @ikeulove @jiyeons-closet @youngheejay @wxnderingthoughts @fuevrois @soobundle1009 @isoobie @enhypenova @zoemeltigloos @lizdevorak @deluluscenarios @bloomiize @hasuyv @ijustwannareadstuff20 @veilstqr @dreamiestay @jakeyyyjakexoxo

[luvseisagi]

— this one's for you.

read part 1 here.

ft. isagi yoichi x reader. wc. 4k

summary. it all started with breakfast, and now you're quite literally the main character of an american teen romcom movie —whats next, a goal dedicated to you? content. fem!reader, fem pronouns used, fluff, crack, slow burn ?? they don't end up dating like officialy but kinda ?? isagis parents are like . very present here. college students!au. reader realizes shes down bad. isagi plays for the uni team and looks very hot doing it. author's note. remember i said id post this soon. well. uni's got me again im SO sorry, but here it is!! idk ive been meaning to write this for a while now but im not sure if i like it at all now ?? i read it too much i guess, hope u do like it tho <3

𝜗𝜚 english isnt my first language, so any corrections or advice are highly appreciated, as well as feedback (please) !

fuck. you think to yourself, going up the stairs as fast as you can. fuck fuck fuck.

you nimbly and silently dodge the faded blue and yellowish-white seats, crouching slightly, trying not to disturb the crowd already settled in the stands, muttering “sorry, i’m sorry, excuse me" every time you step on someone's foot or have to ask them to stand up so you can pass.

you get a couple of judgmental glances and a few retorts, but nothing embarrasses you more than finally reaching the front row of the stands and approaching the only empty seat next to a couple who are staring at you intently.

isagi's parents.

you hurriedly sit down after the person on your other side clears their throat —you’re blocking their view.

"hello," you dare to whisper, tilting your head forward before making eye contact with them, as if that way they can ignore the red hue that's invaded your entire face. "i'm sorry i was late. i got mixed up with the subway and didn't leave home early enough."

that's not true. you've been fully prepared —makeup done and outfit on—, hours before you had to leave. however, ten minutes before you had to get off the subway, you’d looked in the mirror and decided your hair wasn't right, so you had pulled out the hair straightener and brush again. what was supposed to be a simple touch-up turned into a nearly half-hour hairstyling session in front of your bathroom mirror.

and all your effort only served to have the warm summer wind ruffle your hair as you stepped outside.

"yn, right?" isagi's mother —undoubtedly related to him, they have the same eyes— gives you a warm look that makes your heartbeat slow down a bit. "don't worry, the game's just starting, they’re late too.”

"nice to finally meet you, yn." isagi's father peeks out from behind his wife and waves in greeting, also flashing a smile that's exactly like his son's. "yoichi has told us a lot about you."

you reciprocate his gesture with another smile, and turn your head toward the field in front of you. you have a perfect view of all the players from the spot they've reserved for you —high above the field, but not so high that the teams look like simple colored dots on a green blanket. you assume the ones wearing blue are your university's team, since that’s the college’s official color.

isagi has told you about his teammates and practice many times, but somehow he never mentioned any detail about the team's kit or his number.

you're a little embarrassed to ask out loud.

"uh..." you whisper again, leaning slightly closer to isagi's mother without taking your eyes off the field. "what number is yoichi?"

"yoichi, hm?" there's a hint of amusement in his voice, teasing you for using his son's first name. "he's number eleven —there, near the long-haired redheaded boy. do you see him?"

your gaze follows her directions and rests on the blue back of number eleven. his back is turned, but his disheveled black hair and the way he walks are impossible to mistake.

“oh! yeah, i see him now, thanks." you smile, and your chronic need to fill all silences forces you to add something more “i've really been wanting to see him play."

the woman turns her head toward you, looking at you with the same kind expression you see on her son's face every morning. 

"believe me, if you were eager, he was even more so.” she says. “he won't stop talking about you."

and that sentence is enough to make you not say anything else for a while.

you started to suspect that you liked Isagi a couple of weeks ago, before your sudden disappearance —when you panicked because you had no way of contacting him to let him know that you had a family emergency. you’d been chatting since tuesday, at all hours of the day, every day until the game, and he hadn't pressed too much about what happened, probably so you wouldn’t feel bad. from what you could gather, he had been waiting for you every day —but nothing serious, really, don’t worry about it.

taking into account what you already knew about him, you assumed he'd been sitting at the table with the breakfast set, waiting for you all three days of the week. just imagining it made you want to scream into your pillow —he was so kind it made you sick. it made your stomach flutter with butterflies.

that's why you begged your parents to let you return to tokyo for at least a couple of hours that monday afternoon, because, according to you, claiming you’d left something really important at the apartment and needed to pick it up to finish your proyects. you’d run to the campus cafeteria with half your savings in your wallet, a bright green post-it note with your number written on it, and a message for the waitress.

thank god it worked, and you got a text from Isagi the next day. for a solid second, you truly thought you'd messed up completely —and that isagi hated you.

just when you were starting to process the fact that you really liked him.

because you like him. of course you like him.

more than halfway through the school year, things had started to get a little complicated for you —living alone for the first time, not having any really close friends in the city, having to navigate the capital on your own. sure, you may be a sociable and outgoing person, but sometimes everything felt too big. even for you.

and then you met isagi.

being with him is easy. talking with him is easy. feeling better, comfortable, and safe with him is easy. there came a point over these past months when you’d go to bed thinking about seeing him the next day —and he never failed. every morning, he was there, waiting for you with a coffee, a piece of toast, and a smile that started sending a weird tingling into your stomach the moment saw it.

it only took one night of facetime with your best friend back home to realize that a simple friend doesn't make you smile like a fool just thinking about them.

that, and disappearing for a whole week only to come back with a gesture straight out of an american teen romcom definitely isn’t just friends behaviour, you’d say.

a gesture straight out of a teen romcom. a smile escapes you just thinking about it, and you have to bite your lower lip so no one —not the couple next to you, at least— will notice.

but that’s exactly what you look like, right? the main characters of a movie.

you check all the boxes, if you think about it —you met in the university cafeteria every morning and started talking to share a breakfast set because —surprise— you were perfectly compatible. it became a tradition for both of you, to the point you only looked forward to seeing the other every week. then, suddenly, you disappear for a whole week when everything’s going fine, and he has no way to contact you. very convenient for the plot. but really, you hadn’t thought about exchanging socials, since you saw each other every other day anyway. 

thankfully, you managed to give him your number through the cafeteria waitress.

and now you’re at a soccer match, wearing the first blue thing you found in your mother’s closet —a scarf way too warm for a summer day, but the only thing that could pass as team merch— to show your support. his parents are sitting next to you in the stands after saving you a seat. to top it all off, it's a perfect sunny day.

what’s the next thing? a goal dedicated to you?

oh. well. mental note —you think to yourself, snapping back to reality as isagi’s mother grabs your arm excitedly— don’t be sarcastic with the universe ever again.

because, right after spiraling with thoughts of the guy you like for about fifteen whole minutes, you might suddenly find yourself standing in front of your blue seat with your hands up, that guy’s mother pulling you to your feet. your hand grips the railing of the stands, your voice drowned among the crowd’s victory screams —and your gaze searches the field for the one who just scored the first goal of the game.

don’t be sarcastic with the universe again, because when your eyes land on number eleven from the blue team, you might surprise yourself by widely smiling and joining the choir of voices chanting his name, your voice blending into the roar as his teammates lift him in celebration.

and maybe —just maybe— your gaze meets his. and as he grabs his jersey by the number and presses a kiss to it, he points straight at you and mouths, this one’s for you.

or that’s what you think he says. you can’t really hear him from up here, and now everyone’s eyes are on you, and you honestly have no idea how to react.

the match continues, thankfully, and you sit back down without having to say anything. the crowd’s attention returns the field — though you’re pretty sure isagi’s mother is still watching you, but you’re not brave enough to turn and confirm it.

isagi yoichi just dedicated a goal to me. okay. fine. that’s completely fine and means nothing.

except you don’t feel fine at all. and you’re pretty sure it does mean something.

so this time, for real, you put all your attention on the match —because, if you’re honest, you have no idea of what’s been happening on the field since the game started. you try to follow the ball and recall all the plays isagi has described to you so many times. it’s a bit difficult, though, considering you never really understood them and mostly nodded along just because you liked seeing him light up while talking about the things he loves.

yeah. maybe you’ve been down bad for longer than you thought.

as your eyes lock onto number eleven again, you start to regret not paying attention earlier.

he’s a bit far from you now, waiting on the side of the field for a pass or a chance to steal the ball, while his teammate —the one with the blond streaks— skillfully advances with it, weaving through the opposing team. but you can see him clearly.

he looks focused, deep blue eyes fixed on the ball as it draws closer, his jet-black hair waves slightly in the breeze, a few damp strands clinging to his forehead. his mouth is parted slightly, his chest rising and falling with the rhythm of fast-paced breathing from running so much. his athletic shorts hug tightly around his thighs, muscles flexing as he starts to sprint after the now clear ball.

you swallow hard and blink a few times, trying to snap out of it. you're not the one who's been playing for nearly half an hour, but you're pretty sure you need a drink of water more than any of the players.

holy shit. since when is yoichi so hot?

you scratch the back of your neck nervously —a tic you’ve picked up from him—, eyes glued to the field. your face is hot and red, and you know it’s definitely not your too-warm scarf’s fault at all.

still, you can’t look away. you always knew he was handsome —way before you ever gathered the courage to talk to him—, but this is different. he looks confident, almost cocky. there’s a smug little grin when he steals the ball, raised brows when he blocks a goal, and the rest of the time he’s laser-focused, scanning the field. you can’t help but gulp every time his head turns toward the stands and his eyes land on you, even for just a second.

you don’t even catch what he’s yelling, both to his rivals and his teammates —probably not compliments or pretty words, judging by the way the crowd and even his parents react— because it’s impossible to focus on what he’s saying when he looks so aggressive and somehow so attractive doing it.

or maybe you just like him too much, and everything he does seems attractive.. 

either way, it doesn’t matter —because then he scores again, and the crowd erupts. you do too, but not because the scoreboard now reads 3-0, securing the win thanks to number ten’s earlier goal. no.

you turn bright red when, right after scoring, the striker looks straight at you —at your seat— with a confident, satisfied grin, and points at you again.

your legs actually tremble.

he’s driving you insane, and you’re pretty sure he knows it. 

you're so caught up in whatever spell he has you under that, for the rest of the match, you don't process a single a thing —even though your eyes never leave him once.

you do a good job of being a fan, though. 

you stand up with the crowd to clap and cheer when his teammates score two more goals —number 10, whose name is rin, as you've already learned, and the tall, white-haired boy, nagi. you even boo the other team when they get their first and only goal. you nod at all yoichi’s mother comments, who understands the game about as much as you do, and you smile politely at his father when he says something —which you mostly can’t hear over the crowd’s noise, but still respond to with an enthusiastic nod.

the heat gets intense enough that you’re forced to take your jacket off —not technically because of the weather, but no one but you needs to know that. by the end of the match, your jeans are rolled up and you’re left in just a tank top. but the scarf is still around your neck, and you make sure to adjust it carefully across your shoulders before following isagi’s parents down to the field once the crowd begins to disperse.

“what do you think, yn? isn’t he good?” his father asks. 

it’s the first time you can actually make out what he’s saying —the crowd had been way too loud before, and you didn’t want to repeat “what?” twenty times, so you’d just nodded and smiled.

“yeah, wow. he really is.” you answer, walking a little awkwardly between the two of them. you’re not even sure when exactly they managed to surround you “i understand now why you said he’s considered one of the best strikers in japan. i mean, he’s told me a lot about soccer, so i knew he had to be good just from how much he knows… but, wow. he’s amazing.” 

“yes, he is.” his mother adds, flashing you a wide smile. 

you meet her gaze and mirror the expression, and you know she means it when she says “we are very proud of him.”

his father nods in agreement, and something warm and fluttering blooms in your chest. it’s a weird feeling, being proud of someone just because you know others are proud of them too. feeling glad  —relieved, even— that people see him and admire him the same way you do. 

that’s love, you guess.

“he’s really thankful for you” you don’t know where it comes from, but you can’t stop yourself. “he’s told me a bunch of times. he loves you a lot.”

isagi’s mother’s smile softens, her right arm slipping around your shoulders. she adjusts your scarf gently, her fingers brushing your skin as she gives you a warm little squeeze.

“ah, we love him a lot, too.” she replies —then her kind smile shifts into something far too close to a teasing grin. “and something tells me we’re gonna love you a lot, too.”

you’re left completely speechless. you glance away quickly, unable to form a single coherent thought —let alone a response. what are you supposed to say when the mother of the guy you like basically gives you her blessing before you’re even official?

thankfully, isagi is finished talking to his coach and is now approaching you near the edge of the field. 

“yocchan!” his mother calls out, cupping her hands around her mouth to be heard —and removing her arm from around your shoulders in the process. “we’re here!”

you try to laugh at the nickname —you remember him confessing it to you a few mornings ago, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment— but you can’t. you can’t, because you’re speechless again. 

yoichi walks towards you with slow, steady steps.

his face is flushed and glistening with sweat, and his eyes still burn with the thrill of victory—there’re still traces of the same pride and confidence he only ever shows when he’s on the field in his gaze. strands of hair cling to his forehead, and his shirt, damp with sweat, sticks tightly to his frame.

then he grabs the hem of his jersey with one hand and lifts it to his face to wipe off the sweat from his mouth and nose. you try not to stare —really, you try—, but your eyes flick down to his stomach, and then straight back up to his eyes.

he's so attractive you almost choke on air.

isagi's mother starts to take a few steps toward him, but before she can reach him, a small group of girls intercepts him —practically swarming yoichi with flirtatious smiles and compliments that , judging by their tone, probably end with a request for his number.

however, despite how confident he is on the field, isagi’s not like that off of it —he’s more on the shy side. and he clearly has no interest in them at all.

he thanks them politely, as best he can, then awkwardly escapes the circle of attention they’ve trapped him in, practically jogging over to where his parents —and you— are waiting for him.

you know he's nervous when his hands goes to the back of his neck, ruffling his hair. he opens his mouth to say something, but no words come out.

it's funny how the silence is broken not by him, but by the same group of girls from before.

“i have no idea who that is.” one of them says, voice pitched just loud enough to be heard “maybe his sister? or his cousin, or something.”

you both burst out laughing at the interruption—and the assumption— and just like that, the awkward tension fades, letting isagi finally speak.

“thanks for coming.” he says. “i thought you weren’t going to show for a second, when the match started and i didn’t see you.” 

“yeah, had a little subway confusion, so…”

“no! no, i didn't mean it like a complaint or anything —just an observation. i’m really glad you made it.”

you smile softly.

“yeah, i’m really glad i came, too.”

he smiles back, and suddenly, it feels like the first day again, when neither of you knew what to say after that first hi.

you swallow hard, blink, and then break the silence.

“you were… fuck, you were amazing out there.” 

you’re staring at him —a little too openly. and then it hits you: you’re not alone. “oh! i mean- i mean, you were, wow, amazing out there.” you correct yourself quickly, glancing at his parents beside you.

his father chuckles.

“don’t worry. after all the things he’s shouted on the field, a simple fuck is nothing.”

your face burns red —redder than the opposing team’s jerseys— while both his parents laugh.

and you expect isagi to laugh too, or brush it off like he did with the girls earlier. but, instead, he blushes, and looks at you with that small, lopsided smile that makes your chest ache. 

then he looks away again, ruffling his hair.

there’s your breakfast partner again. not the star athlete —just the cute guy from the cafeteria that studies psychology and plays soccer.

"thanks. you, uh..”

he glances at his mom, who subtly gestures, nudging him to say more —like this is something they’ve rehearsed.

"you look very pretty today.” he finally says. 

then he adds, quickly:

“i mean, you always do —not just today. but you look specially pretty today." and he’s babbling again "that blue scarf looks great on you. but, uh, you also look kind of like you’re suffocating?”

you laugh. if only he knew it’s not the weather, but him, what’s making your face so red.

"i remembered uni's color was blue” you explain, fingers fidgeting with the end of the scarf. “didn’t have any merch, so i just tried to support you with whatever i had at home.”

what you don’t mention is that you stole it from you mom’s closet back in your hometown, after having a full-blown crisis over not owning anything remotely close to your college’s colors.

“well, i could give you something.” he offers, voice low and a bit nervous. “i have a few spare jerseys at home." 

you’re about to answer —or collapse, honestly, because you’re pretty sure this is the kind of things official couples do in cliché romantic movies— but then his mom cuts in:

“speaking of that —why don’t you come over, yn?” she asks. “i made yocchan’s favorite meal today. have lunch with us? he told us you live alone, so there’s no issue, right?” 

you start to understand where isagi got his talent for yapping.

“we’ll get to know you better, yoichi thanks you for coming to the game, and he gives you his jersey." 

your brain becomes a chaotic mess of thoughts. you want to say yes, obviously. you want to thank her for the invitation. you want to ask isagi what giving you his jersey means. you want to see his room and his house, but you also kind of want to run back to your place, dive onto your bed, and scream into a pillow.

isagi misreads your hesitation.

"mom, she might have plans. don’t pressure her—" 

"no, no, i’d love to go!" you interrupt quickly. 

yoichi raises a brow, clearly surprised —he knows you don’t really like his favorite dish. you’ve been bickering about it for weeks.

"thank you for inviting me."

"you heard her, yoichi, she said yes.” his mom beams. “now go shower, you’re still red from the match. you’ve got fifteen minutes, meet us at the car. meanwhile, yn and us have lots to talk about.”

somehow, she doesn’t make it sound like a threat, more like an invitation. 

drawing a smile, isagi mumbles a soft "sorry" before heading to the locker room. as he walks away, you call out: “i´ll be fine. i think she likes me." 

isagi’s smile is wide and bright right before he disappears through the locker room door. he’s so wrapped up in his own joy —so stupidly in love— he doesn’t even notice the trap he’s just walked into.

inside, the locker room is already full. his teammates are waiting, ready to tease him.

"i have some spare jerseys" karasu mocks, his voice high-pitched, grinning wide. "i could give you one”

isagi throws his towel at him.

"oh, shut up”

"nah, thats a good move, isagi" otoya chimes in “i've done that a bunch. nothing makes me play better than having a cute girl with my number on in the stands”

isagi doesn't love the comparison. otoya is famous for rotating girls every match —and that’s so not him. definitely not with you. 

he wants you at all his games. he wants you to be the only one ever, actually. for everything. only you, even if it seems too intense.

"its not like that" isagi says "i really like her. like… marry-her-like-her. having-kids-with-her-like-her. celebrate-christmas-with-her-like-her. ” 

otoya blinks.

"huh? well, i like all my girlfriends a lot too.”

isagi doesn’t respond —mostly because chigiri and reo immediately jump into a debate with otoya about how what he just said is probably offensive to, like, every girl in the country. and in the world.

still, one word lingers in his mind.

girlfriend. 

yeah. he wouldn’t mind calling you that at all.

masterlist.

tags ౨ৎ @ireallylikemenalot @rohfulike @numberonenessandnagistan @blu3-l0v3r .ᐟ (i tagged everyone who asked for the part 2, hope u dont mind <3 tell me if u want me to remove u from the list no prob!!)

﹫luvseisagi, june 2025.

[gyubakeries]

𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝘆 𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲 𝗴𝗼𝗲𝘀 | l.jh [1]

a/n: dedicated to ro, ( @shinysobi ) who has become one of my closest friends in caratblr. ro and i have yapped, for hours on end, about everything and nothing, and especially about mingyu and jihoon. whenever i have even the slightest inspiration for a new plot, ro always encourages me to take it further, resulting in a whole bunch of headcanons that will probably live on only in our dms. call me crazy for gifting someone angst on their birthday, but ro is one of the few people who loves angst as much as i do, and i couldn't resist this fic idea :)

the fic will be divided into 4 parts, because i suck at planning ahead, but please anticipate the next parts to be slightly happier than this emotional wreck!

shout-out to supi ( @supi-wupi ) for making this cute banner!! its exactly the way i imagined <33 also thank you for reading over this fic. serena ( @gotta-winwin ) , jina ( @facethesunflower ) and rae ( @nerdycheol ) helped me figure out the storyline of this fic!! thank u alll <33

and lastly, happy birthday ro :) ILYSM WOOZILOVER69 <3

word count: 2.4k contents: jihoon x f!reader , angst , medical!au , but not much focus on the medical aspect , this part is just sad , reader gets fired , jihoon gets dumped , nightmares

when the door to the director’s office closes behind you, the rain outside is a light drizzle. by the time you manage to empty your locker and drag your weary feet out the main entrance to the hospital, the large drops of rain feel almost painful as they hit your skin. 

you walk to the nearest bus stop, and the rain doesn’t let up. you’re standing there alone, getting drenched in the rain like a fool, because everyone else either checked the weather forecast and remembered to carry an umbrella, or had someone remind them. 

as the doors of an empty bus come to a halt in front of you, it hits you just how lonely you’ve been. you’re not sure if the lone bus driver notices your tears mix with the rain soaking you, but he thankfully doesn’t probe when you ask, “till when do the buses run?”

“for a few more hours, till eleven,” the bus driver replies, and you feel a weird mix of relief and sadness at the thought of getting to be alone for some more time. 

“i’ll pay whatever it takes to just keep driving till eleven. you can go anywhere, i don’t mind,” for a moment, you think the old man may laugh in your face at your request, but his kind eyes reveal that he must have encountered people just as lost as you felt now and driven them out to a better place. 

“no worries, kid,” he smiles. “just take a seat, i’ll look after the rest.”

the bus ride passes in silence as you stare out of the window, head completely devoid of any thoughts. it was a welcome change from the constant tornado of what-ifs, maybes, and could have beens that wreak havoc in your mind. 

for the first thirty minutes, the bus driver tries to subtly take a look at your silent, shivering figure. he’s probably wondering why someone soaked to the bone wouldn’t ask for even a paper napkin to try and dry themselves off. 

at the lack of any communication from you, the remainder of your bus journey passes with the bus driver’s eyes focusing on the road, while yours wander aimlessly. 

at the end of your two hours, you manage to pull out crumpled bills from your wallet and hand them over to the driver before leaving the bus. 

you had no idea where you were, and for the first time in ages, the uncertainty surrounding you wasn’t slowly killing you from the inside. you pull yourself together for long enough to find dry clothes, a nearby hotel, and a room for the night. 

the end of a day that you’d never even imagined manages to surprise you one last time—when your head hits the pillow, you immediately drift off to sleep. the haunting beep of your pager, the constant worrying about your future, and a thousand regrets from your past weren’t around to keep you awake, and you feel an ironic sense of gratitude for your current situation right before you fall asleep. 

hearing your mother’s voice over the speakers of your phone makes you tear up. the nostalgia of hearing her ask if you’ve eaten breakfast, just like how she used to when you still lived with her, creates an uncomfortable lump in your throat. you swallow thickly and answer shakily, “no, i haven’t eaten yet, eomma.”

“you should eat, sweetie. grab something from the hospital cafeteria, won’t you?” your mother tuts, the concern in her voice making you sick to your stomach with the guilt stirring up in your gut. 

it had been three days, ten hours, and twenty-four minutes since you’d stepped into the hospital. your white doctor’s coat hangs off a chair at your dining table, the pocket that once held your employee badge empty. you hadn’t touched that coat in three days, ever since you left the hotel and came back to your apartment, not even to disentangle the stethoscope hanging out of a pocket. 

the usual, perfectly-pressed white fabric of your coat was now crinkly with misuse, and each wrinkle stared back at you tauntingly, reminding you of your failed goals.

“i’ll do that,” you say, instead of saying i don’t even work at the hospital anymore. “my team needs me now, eomma. i’ll call you back later.”

“okay, sweetie,” your mother sounds hesitant, almost as if the crack in your voice makes her doubt your employment status. “call more often, okay? i really miss you.”

“i will,” you lie, again, and there’s a strange pain in your chest long after the call disconnects. a pain you thought you’d gotten used to over the years of lies and excuses.

things change, a small voice in the back of your head says, and after looking at the abandoned white coat on the chair across you, you couldn’t agree more.

“i can’t do this,” younghee sighs, the tense line of her shoulders giving away her frustration. “you keep asking me the same question, and it’s—”

“forgive me for wondering how much longer i’ll have to wait to get married to you!” jihoon interrupts her, shrugging his coat off with more force than usual.

“why do you keep asking if you know you’ll get the same answer?” younghee argues. “begging a hundred times won’t make me say yes!”

“begging?” jihoon scoffs. “now you think i’m begging you to get married? we’re engaged, for fuck’s sake! am i not allowed to ask about our wedding? it’s been three years, younghee. aren’t you tired of delaying this every time?”

“i am tired, jihoon,” younghee answers, but the exhaustion in her tone sounds different. “i’m tired because i don’t want this wedding at all.”

“what do you mean?” jihoon asks. “do you need more time to think? because three whole years seems like a lot of time to think.”

“i-i’ve already made up my mind,” younghee sounds resigned and guilty, and jihoon’s mind keeps firing off alerts at the unfamiliar tone of younghee’s voice. what he learns, though, is that no amount of warnings would have prepared him for the words that followed.

“i don’t want this wedding at all, jihoon, because i don’t want to be with you anymore.”

———

the aftermath of this recurring nightmare is the same. jihoon wakes up gasping for breath, his shirt soaked with sweat and heart racing unnaturally.

like clockwork, he looks to the empty side of his bed, the lingering scent of younghee’s shampoo having faded from the pillows a long time ago. he looks at the nightstand next to him and the framed photograph of him with who he thought would be beside him for life.

then, with robot-like movements, jihoon leaves his bed, the unblinking numbers on his alarm clock reading 4:37. he wordlessly pads into his kitchen, tries to ignore the matching pink mug next to his blue one, and pours himself a cold glass of milk.

the coffee machine next to the stove lays unused, like it has been for the past six months, with no one to drink coffee. jihoon always found coffee too bitter for his palate, and with younghee gone, even milk spreads over his tongue like bitter poison.

on nights like these, jihoon thinks. he thinks about the pathetic person he’s reduced himself into by living within the same, suffocating walls of his apartment. he thinks about how he should move on, at least make some effort, but he also thinks about how much it hurts his heart to even walk past the living room and glance at the bouquet of dead roses he had bought for younghee six months ago, the night everything had changed.

everyone tells him he needs to move on, but change hurts, and jihoon has never liked feeling pain.

you weren’t planning this, but somehow, your entire apartment has been packed into boxes. your apartment, with its ceiling-to-floor glass windows and large balcony, once your safe space, had now become a cruel reminder of how you didn’t have a job to pay even another month of rent.

“you’re leaving? just like that?” a voice startles you out of your thoughts, and you turn to see haerin standing at the door of your apartment, arms crossed and eyebrows furrowed.

“how did you know i was—?” you start, but haerin interrupts you with a pointed look. “mr. song called me when he saw the packers enter your apartment. why didn’t you tell me?”

you can’t get yourself to feel too angry at the old watchman, not when he’s taken care of you on multiple occasions when you felt so tired after your shifts at the hospital to even unlock the door to your apartment. you do, however, feel dread crawling its way up your chest at haerin’s sharp gaze.

“i didn’t think it was that important,” you shrug, your lie sounding unconvincing to even your ears.

“i know i call you an idiot, but i never thought you were this stupid,” haerin scoffs. “you’re my best friend, y/n. how could you think that you moving out wasn’t important enough to tell me?”

“haerin, let’s just drop the topic,” you sigh. “i’ve got a lot to do, and i can’t waste time like this.”

“i know you’re trying to push me away, but you forget that i’ve been your friend throughout med school,” haerin ignores your protests as she steps into your apartment, carefully avoiding all the scattered boxes. “i can deal with your every mood, so don’t expect me to leave here without an explanation. why are you leaving all of a sudden?”

“is it really that hard to see?” you sneer. “i fucking failed, haerin. i messed up and now i have no job, and no hospital is willing to take me in. anywhere i go, people stare and whisper at me. i’m the new freak in this city, so forgive me for running away from something that hurts me.”

“have you even tried to look for new positions?” haerin counters, her eyes softening when she sees the tears in yours. “i have a friend at asan, and he can help you out—”

“i don’t want to be a charity case,” you shake your head. “i haven’t worked my ass off just to be handed a job offer out of pity. i’m done with this city, and it’s clearly done with me too.”

“you can’t be giving up that easily, y/n,” haerin presses further. “give it some time, and maybe you’ll even get your old job back.”

“with kim hyungsoo kissing the director’s ass? yeah, sure,” you roll your eyes. “haerin, he got me kicked out of the hospital i’ve contributed a quarter of my life to. he has money, power, and every odd is stacked against me. there’s no way i’m going back there.”

haerin’s shoulders slump; she’s clearly out of any other arguments, and it makes you feel a twisted sense of relief. you don’t want to have a pointless argument with your best friend, but you also wish that something, anything, would stop you from upending the life you’ve made for yourself in seoul and going back to your hometown.

you hang onto a sliver of hope, expecting haerin to magically come up with another solution, but your next move is clearly laid out in front of you when haerin wraps you in a tight hug and says, “i’ll miss you, y/n.”

“haven’t seen you in this town before.”

jihoon turns his head to the side to see a kid standing next to him. he has a serious expression on his face, as serious as a ten-year old can get, but the bright red lollipop in his hands and the shaggy bowl-cut made it hard for jihoon to take him seriously.

“do you have another one of those lollipops on you?” jihoon answers, and the kid gives him a judging glance. after ten seconds of scanning jihoon up and down, the kid gives him a satisfied nod. “i’ll give you two if you give me 500 won.”

“deal, but you need to tell me your name first,” jihoon smiles, and the kid is quick to reply.

“my name is kim dohun,” dohun says. “what’s yours?”

“lee jihoon,” jihoon offers him a handshake, and dohun just gives him an unimpressed look, so jihoon awkwardly retracts his hand. just when he thought that he’d botched his first conversation with possibly one of the only people who didn’t know who he was in this town, dohun speaks up.

“you look tired. do you want ice-cream?”

dohun looks much more trusting now, and that makes jihoon smile even wider.

“yeah, i’d love an ice-cream, dohun-ssi.”

within five minutes, dohun had led jihoon to a convenience store near the train station jihoon had arrived at. with the air of someone who knows what he likes, dohun picks out a strawberry-flavored ice-cream for himself, and looks at jihoon as he picks out his choice.

with a melona ice-cream in his hands, jihoon joins dohun on the bench outside the convenience store after paying for both their snacks. his luggage is tucked away next to the large tub holding umbrellas for customers who forget their own.

“so, ahjussi, you still didn’t say—”

“call me hyung, dohun-ssi,” jihoon stops him. “i’m really not that old.”

“doesn’t look like it,” dohun mumbles, but he agrees anyway. “you can call me just dohun, jihoon-hyung. now can you tell me why i’ve never seen you here?”

“i’ve been away, dohun-ah,” jihoon sighs. “i was born here, but i moved out a long time ago, maybe even before you were born.”

“why did you move out?” dohun asks. despite all the maturity he tries to carry himself with, jihoon can clearly point out the childlike curiosity peeking through in his tone.

“because of…. work,” jihoon replies, as vaguely as possible. 

“it feels like you’re lying though?” dohun questions with an accuracy only children possess in making judgements about new people. “your eyes look very sad, hyung.”

jihoon figures that even smiles can’t hide the heartbreak in his eyes, so he cuts out the pretense. dohun seems to appreciate the honesty in the defeated line of jihoon’s shoulders, and jihoon feels relieved that he doesn’t have to lie to another person about how he’s feeling.

“i am sad, dohun-ah,” jihoon confesses. “and i don’t know when i’ll feel better, or even if i ever will.”

“you will, hyung,” dohun says, and his words feel even more genuine than all the consolation from colleagues jihoon left behind in daegu. “i’ll help you, if you’d like that.”

“i’d like that,” jihoon nods, turning to face dohun. “i really would.”

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[wheeboo]

pulse points | wen junhui

SYNOPSIS. Being the TA for your anatomy class has always been really rewarding, especially stemming in your passion for the medical field. But as it’s approaching the peak of the school semester and labs have gotten more intense, you aren’t surprised to be dedicating your time to tutoring your strangely handsome, dorky, yet enigmatic classmate during after school hours — and reassuring him how to not be afraid of dissections. PAIRING. wen junhui x TA!reader (ft. performance unit as jun's roommates + mentions of wonwoo and jihoon) GENRE. fluff, classmates to lovers, humour WARNINGS/TAGS. unrealistic TA x student dynamics lmao, lots of medical sciency-anatomy talk, talks about dissections n cutting into things (they dissect a sheep brain), mentions of tools used for dissections, yn is wayyy too studious its a bit unhealthy perhaps, their love language is napping together n sharing food :(, alcohol and drinking (yn gets drunk 😣), they flirt in the middle of a damn dissection AHHAHA WORD COUNT. 15.9k

notes: this is my fic for the "back to school" collab hosted by @camandemstudios! i hope u all enjoy <3 was lowkey hating this fic as i wrote it but... i think it turned out fine?!?! thank you to all my moots, specifically @bananabubble @slytherinshua @etherealyoungk and the collab discord server for either helping me w ideas n brainrot or reading over the fic!! love u all to the stars and back <3

Three dollars is not enough for Jun to buy himself lunch. 

He could probably snag himself a stale, English muffin from the dining hall, but then he’d be walking around campus with a dry tongue until after his classes end. And unsurprisingly, he forgot his water bottle back in his apartment. Briefly, he considers texting Soonyoung or Minghao to perhaps drop by the apartment and grab his water bottle or even a quick snack that’ll last him, but the two of them were already knee deep enough of responsibilities of their own. 

Fucking capitalism. 

He’s already out of breath speed walking all the way from across campus and through four different hallways. The large windows of the science building bring in the natural sunlight at the peak of the afternoon, allowing it to cascade across the polished floors and right to the ends of his feet with every step that he takes. 

Jun purses his lips together tightly as he rounds one last corner before arriving in front of his current class: Anatomy. The quick glance at the time displayed on his phone shows that he’s around eight minutes late, which is way better than the fifteen minutes from last week. His shoulders slouch slightly with a bit of dread as he reaches for the doorknob and pulls it open.

Compared to the beginning of the year, there’s more empty seats in the lecture hall now. Honestly, Jun is surprised he hasn’t dropped out of the class yet, because his grade in all honesty isn’t… the best, to put it simply𑁋he’s passing, somehow, but just barely.

But he simply can’t afford to drop it and take on a new class like a snap of a finger, and he knows that if he bails now, he’ll only be prolonging his graduation date, a situation neither his parents nor his bank account would be happy about. He wasn’t even supposed to be in this class in the first place, but his horrible procrastination habits and the fact that the other classes he wanted filled up so quickly left him with no other choice.

Jun sits down in a seat near the back of the class, trying to blend in and hoping the professor won’t notice his tardiness. He swiftly pulls out his notebook and laptop and redirects his focus to the front of the classroom, where he sees Professor Lee already lecturing something about vascular anatomy and blood circulation, motioning towards the slideshow displayed on the screen. 

“…the brachiocephalic trunk branches off the aortic arch, which divides into the right subclavian artery and the right common carotid artery. These arteries supply blood to the arm and the brain, respectively…”

The words seem to flow through his brain like water. Even when he jots them down in his notes for him to study later, he reads the words like hieroglyphics. Perhaps it’s the hunger getting to him or just the mounting stress, but the lecture feels like it’s slipping through his fingers.

By the time Professor Lee finishes with the lecture, he has five pages of notes that feel like a jumble of terms and diagrams.

However, just as he thought he might finally catch a break, the slideshow switches to the next slide. 

“Now, let’s discuss the final major lab that will be crucial for your grades,” Professor Lee explains, a determined look on his face. “Your dissections that you will be finishing the year off with. I’m letting you all know about these in advance so you would have plenty of time to prepare.”

Jun’s stomach drops. Dissections. Of course, he knew it was coming, as it was quite literally listed in eye-catching bold letters in the syllabus at the beginning of the term. Yet the thought of cutting into anything and seeing its insides makes him almost squeamish. 

“This will account for a significant portion of your final grade. I can’t stress enough how important it is to take this seriously. Remember that dissections aren’t just about retaining names and locations in the body. They’re about seeing the relationships between different structures and understanding how they function together in real life.”

Every fibre of his being is aching for him to raise his hand and stupidly refute. He imagines what he’d say𑁋“I’m not good with blood,” or “Is there another activity I could do because I’m absolutely scared shitless?”𑁋but the words stick in his throat. Instead, he slouches further in his seat, hoping to disappear. He weighs all of his options, but they’re all equally unappealing: he can’t drop the class, he can’t afford to fail, and he certainly can’t magically become proficient at dissections overnight.

“Since the class has an uneven amount of students and the limited amount of specimens we have, I’ve decided to pair you all up. Y/N, may you hand out the partner lists?”

Jun feels himself tense in his seat as his eyes scan the room and land on you. Not only are you the TA of the class, but your seemingly calm demeanour as you drift throughout the room handing each student paperwork makes you appear almost intimidating to his eyes. 

When you finally reach him, he swears he catches a glimpse of a slight curl to your lips as you silently hand him the slip of paper that contains his partner assignment, before walking down to the next person. 

At first, the paper essentially states the same information that was discussed earlier: the dissection assignment, guidelines, and a list of required materials. But then his gaze falls to the part that matters most: his partner's name.

Y/N L/N, it reads. You’re his partner. Shit.

Your calm, composed attitude and role as the TA have already set a high bar for expectations in his mind. You’re probably going to be hyperanalysing and dissecting every aspect of his class performance, knowing his poor little heart wouldn’t be able to handle all that. You probably already have this tarnished reputation of him in your mind, with his frequent tardiness and the amount of times he’s dozed off in class.

Jun glances around the lecture hall, noticing other students exchanging whispers and glances at their own partner assignments. Some seem relieved, while others look as apprehensive as he feels. His stomach churns with the thought of having to work closely with you.

Professor Lee clears his throat and speaks, “Now that you all know your partners, I request that you all sit next to each other. These will be your seats starting from today and until the lab finishes. I also strongly encourage you all to exchange contact information with each other. Your collaboration together will be vital to your success in this lab.”

As the students shuffle around, Jun finds himself stuck in an uncomfortable limbo, watching as everyone pairs up and settles into their new seats, naturally exchanging contact information with one another. Then he shuffles for his backpack that was leaning against his chair in order to go find where you sit, but as he’s about to stand up, he’s met with you taking a seat right next to him.

Your eyes meet. A faint smile crosses your features. His backpack slips off his shoulders and falls to the floor with a dramatic thump.

“Hi,” You greet him softly, before offering a hand to him. “Granola bar? Had an extra one.”

Jun just blinks, eyes flickering between your face and the hand you have extended out to him. Then he awkwardly clears his throat, tentatively reaching out to grab the granola bar from your grasp, and the warmth emitting from your hand seems to crawl up his neck. 

“Thanks,” he mutters sheepishly, shifting his gaze away to hide a small upturn to the corners of his lips. 

The rest of class passes by in a blur, mainly with Professor Lee going over proper attire to wear and safety protocols for the dissection labs. And when the clock strikes dismissal time, students begin to filter out of the lecture hall, chatting amongst themselves as Jun struggles to stuff his laptop inside his backpack. 

You’re already gone to the front to talk to Professor Lee when Jun looks over. He watches as you hand in what looks like a stack of paper, only to be given another one right back, probably of assignments that the class has done lately. The air of professionalism that surrounds you is quite admirable, he would say. 

You seem to exchange a few more words with Professor Lee before turning on your heel to leave the lecture hall, the stack of papers neatly held under your arm.

By the time Jun is already on his way to his next class, he pulls the granola bar that you had given him out from the pocket of his jeans, unwrapping it and taking a bite out of it, savouring the moment as it relieves his nerves and gnawing hunger. 

Then by the time finishes his last class for the day, reality hits him the second he steps out of the building. Figuratively, and maybe even literally, at this point. 

He forgot to get your number for this lab.

The click of your pen echoes throughout the vast lecture hall. Unintelligible mutters leave your lips as your eyes quickly scan over the papers in front of you with ease. Among the many tasks you have assigned as TA, grading assignments is one of them, and you find yourself marking and correcting each paper just as you’ve done many times before. 

There used to be rumours floating around that your grading style was particularly strict, even more so than Professor Lee. Though it was probably spread around with the intention to intimidate other students and establish your reputation as someone annoyingly meticulous, you hardly let it get to you. 

The truth is, you were fair in your grading, but thorough. You didn’t see the point in letting half-baked work slide, especially when you knew these assignments could determine someone’s future. Medicine has been your passion for as long as you could remember, and that dedication extended into almost everything you did. Being the TA for the class was just one factor of it. 

It’s much, much quieter after school hours when most classes have finished for the day, and it’s natural to bask in the peacefulness that drifts throughout the barren room. You sort out the papers in front of you in a neat stack before taking a moment to stretch your arms up above your head, a soft sigh leaving you at the tension dissipating away from your limbs. 

As you begin to shuffle through all the papers in front of you𑁋separating them into piles of graded assignments and unfinished ones that you’ll save for later on𑁋there’s a quiet knock at the door that makes you pause in place. You turn your head towards the door, anticipating for someone to come in. 

Then another knock.

You swear you see some sort of shadow in the door window. It appears then disappears, and you  roll your eyes, thinking it was just someone who was lost or purposely going around knocking on each door (which has happened way more than one could expect). 

The shadow appears again, and this time, you decide on heading to the door yourself. And as you twist the doorknob and pull the door open simultaneously, you find yourself coming face-to-face with Jun, who looks a bit sheepish as he’s caught mid-knock. His eyes widen upon seeing you right in front of him, and he brings his hand down to his side. 

You blink up at him, not expecting for him to be here at this moment of the day.

“Junhui?” 

It’s at this point of his life that Jun realises he really isn’t used to people calling him by his proper first name. But the way you say it is different𑁋soft and warm, like an unexpected compliment.

“Uh, hi,” he greets a tad bit awkwardly, mentally slapping himself in the face. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything?” 

“Oh, no, you’re not. Don’t worry,” You tell him reassuringly, catching the way his eyes seem to flicker everywhere but on you. “Is there anything I can help you with?” 

Jun fidgets slightly, his gaze bouncing between the floor and your face. He takes a deep breath, trying to steady his nerves. “Actually, I... um, forgot to get your number earlier today. For… for the lab, I mean. Professor Lee said we should exchange information so I thought I would ask. Unless you don’t want to, of course.”

You raise an eyebrow, a hint of a smile playing at your lips. “Ah, I see. No problem. I’m glad you came by to get it. Here, let me just𑁋”

You shove into your back pocket to retrieve your phone, only to feel that it wasn’t there. Then you glance over to your desk, seeing it sitting next to your abundance of papers, before returning back to Jun.

You shove a hand into your back pocket to retrieve your phone, only to feel that it wasn’t there. Then you glance over to your desk, seeing it sitting next to your abundance of papers, before returning back to Jun.

“Here, you can come in. Let me just get my phone real quick.” You step to the side and open the door wider for him.

Jun visibly hesitates in the doorway, before muttering a quiet thank you and stepping inside the lecture hall. It’s certainly a sight to see the room so stripped of other students besides you and him, the sounds of his footsteps bouncing off the walls. He takes in the stacks of papers that you have spread across your desk, and he feels some nerves snake their way up his spine at the thought of you grading his work.

“Wow, that looks like a lot,” he comments gingerly. 

“Yeah, it’s quite the pile, right?” You agree with a light chuckle as you grab your phone and unlock it. “Always happens near the end of the sem.” 

Jun’s eyes wash over you with a look of concern. “That seems… stressful.”

You just shrug nonchalantly. “It’s nothing I can’t handle. Besides, it keeps me busy.” 

“Well, you should get some good rest after this then,” he remarks coolly. 

“Wish I could, but I have some tutoring scheduled in about half an hour,” You say, tone warm but tinged with a hint of weariness as you glance at the time on your phone. “One of the students in the intro biology class needs help with some of the basics before their midterm. So… rest will have to wait.”

From that, Jun shifts awkwardly, his fingers playing with the strap of his backpack. His brain races as he considers his options. You’re clearly knowledgeable and dedicated, not to mention you seem approachable, but the thought of admitting how much he’s struggling makes his throat dry, plus the guilt of adding more to your busy plate. 

“Tutoring, huh?” Jun finally says, trying to sound casual. “Is that… something you do a lot?”

You nod, tapping away on your phone as you pull up your contact information. “Yeah, actually. It’s nice to help people out. Keeps me up with the material too. Usually I’m free most days at any time after classes.”

Jun continues to gaze at you wonderingly until after you pick up your head to look at him, to which he faces away immediately. He scratches the back of his neck bashfully, before fixing his posture and clearing his throat.

“Do you… have room for one more student?” Then he feels the immediate regret afterwards. “It’s okay if not. I know that you’re busy and all that𑁋”

“Junhui,” You interrupt gently, a calm smile on your face. “I have room. Don’t worry about it.

He lets out a breath he didn’t realise he was holding, the reassuring warmth on your face easing the knots in his stomach. “Really? You wouldn’t mind?”

“I’d be more than happy to find a time that works for us both. Just let me know what you need, and we’ll figure a time out. We’re lab partners, after all,” You say gleefully. “Speaking of which, you can put your number in here.”

You extend an arm with your phone in-hand. Jun takes the phone from your hand, his fingers brushing against yours for a brief moment, and types in his phone number and information. When he hands the phone back, he looks up to meet your eyes, trying to muster a more confident expression.

“Thank you so much, really, I…” His voice trails off for a moment, trying to regain his words. “I’ll owe you one for this, truly.” 

“There’s no need.”

Jun shakes his head. “Seriously, I’ll feel bad.”

You bite at your bottom lip in thought, an endearing look washing over your features as you consider his insistence. The pleading in his eyes is hard to ignore, and it makes your heart soften in your chest. You take a moment to think before offering a small, playful grin.

“Alright.” You cross your arms together. “We’ll see.” 

Perhaps… you aren’t as intimidating as he thinks.

Jun is staring at a sheep brain. 

Not a real one𑁋a picture of one, specifically. It’s apparently very similar to the human brain, and the specimen he’s expected to dissect for the upcoming lab. 

He stares at the image displayed on the large screen right before his eyes, feeling a strange mix of fascination and dread. The detailed structures and labels are overwhelming, each word swimming in and out of focus as he tries to absorb the information. It's not that he isn't interested𑁋on the contrary, there's a part of him that's genuinely curious about how it all works, and the other part of him is utterly disturbed. 

You’re sitting next to him again, just like everyone else is sitting next to their partners, taking notes and even drawing a very rushed outline of the brain on your paper. 

“We have to dissect that…?” Jun whispers under his breath, as if speaking any louder might bring the brain to life. 

“Yep,” You reply, glancing over at Jun. “It’s not as bad as it looks.”

Jun attempts to stifle a groan, eyes going between the image on the screen and down to his near-empty notes. He can’t help but wonder how on earth he’s going to get through this without completely embarrassing himself.

Letting your eyes roam over Jun for a moment, the visible discomfort in the way he crosses his arms together and the furrow in his brow doesn’t escape your notice. Casually, you scoot your chair towards him a little bit, along with your notebook so that it’s settled in the space between the two of you with the outline of the brain clearly visible on the page. Your shoulder almost brushes against his. 

“Here,” You say softly, tapping your pen on the page. “I’ve got the main structures labeled already. You can add them to your notes if you want. I can explain it to you in more detail when you come to tutoring tomorrow?”

Oh, that’s right. Tomorrow is the day you both were free and decided it was the day where Jun could stop by after classes end to have his first tutoring session with you. 

“Yeah, uh, that would be great,” Jun responds quietly, peeking over at how neat and organised your notes appeared to be. “Thank you.”

“No problem.” You nod, before soundlessly shuffling inside your bag and extending it out to Jun. “Granola bar?” 

Jun glances at the granola bar being offered by you, its wrapper crinkling slightly as you hold it out to him. He smiles, a little lopsided but genuine, and takes the bar from you. The hesitation in his shoulders has deflated slightly than from the first time you proposed one to him. 

Maybe this won’t be so bad after all.

“Bro, are you going out on a date or what? You’re stinking up a storm here.” Soonyoung lets out a few dramatic coughs at the sudden sharp scent of Minghao’s perfume hitting his nose, followed by Chan behind him nearly gagging at the smell. Though obviously one would expect for the owner himself to be the one using it, he certainly didn’t expect for the culprit to be none other than Jun.

Okay, yes, he may have accidentally sprayed a shit ton of Minghao’s perfume on himself, which was a bit of an overkill. But he clearly wasn’t thinking straight after waking up from a nap between deciding to take a really quick shower or stealing his roommate’s expensive perfume. 

“You think this is too much?” Jun asks unsurely. 

Beside him, Chan rolls his eyes while clutching a bowl of ramen. “You smell like you’re trying to cover up a crime scene. It might suffocate someone. Where are you even going anyway?”

Jun clears his throat. “Tutoring𑁋”

“Tutoring?!” Soonyoung exclaims in surprise. “For which class?”

“Anatomy𑁋”

“Hell no,” Soonyoung crinkles his nose at the mention of anatomy. “You're telling me you’re getting all dolled up for a tutoring session on dissecting brains and guts? Are you trying to seduce the organs or something?” 

Jun groans at his roommate’s words, shaking his head. But before he can say anything in response, Chan seems to beat him to it.

“Don’t you have this really strict TA in your class too? I’ve heard that they don’t even offer partial credit or crack a smile during lectures. Like, they’re just a machine, dude,” the youngest adds in.

It’s quite literally insane to hear that kind of description about you leave Chan’s mouth when all of his interactions with you have been nothing but short and sweet, to put it simply. Though he won’t deny he’s heard all those rumours spread around about you𑁋that you’re strict, and perhaps a bit intimidating. He’s had his fair share of moments where he felt overwhelmed by your grading and meticulous nature. Yet from what he’s seen of you so far, you’re passionate, friendly if anything, and your smile is… cute. 

Jun only shrugs his shoulders. “Yeah, they’re in my class, but I’m just trying to get my grade up before the year ends. I think I can handle them.” 

Soonyoung huffs a breath, stepping up to Jun and giving him some sort of comforting pat on the back, almost like he feels bad for him. 

“Well, good luck, dude,” he reassures him, though it hardly eases Jun’s nerves at all. “Don’t get crucified in there.” 

As Jun wanders down the familiar hallway to the classroom, he finds his thoughts beginning to second-guess everything. What if he ultimately fails meeting your expectation at the end of the session? What if he struggles to fully grasp the material and ends up looking like an absolute fool in front of you by the time the real dissections roll around? 

However, those thoughts are pushed away when the door to the classroom swings open before he has the opportunity to knock, with you standing on the other side. Your face seems to light up at the sight of him, and it makes Jun briefly think about what Soonyoung said earlier about you. Like… was he talking about the same person?

“Hey, you made it,” You greet him, stepping aside so he could walk in. “Let me just finish organising some things and we can start.” 

Jun’s eyelashes bat together in curiosity as he watches you rummage through some papers, before deciding it's worth sitting down to wait for you. He places himself down an empty desk, fishing out his notebook and laptop and whatever he may need, though he doesn’t really know. By the time you’re making your way over to him, you set your stuff right next to his. 

“Okay.” You let out a relieved breath, peering at him. “Where do you want to start?” 

Oh, he hadn’t really thought that far ahead yet.

“Uh,” Jun stammers, fumbling for a moment, his mind suddenly drawing blanks. He quickly opens his notebook to the page where he had jotted down some half-baked notes during class and is staring back at him like a puzzle missing half its pieces. “Maybe… maybe we can start with what we’re going over in class right now? And just go down from there?”

“We can do that,” You agree without hesitation, leaning in more so that you were able to see his notes. Jun draws himself slightly back. “So, as you know, we’re going to have to be familiar with the parts and functions of the brain since it’s also part of the dissections. What I like to do is break it down into smaller sections and tackle each one individually. It might make the whole thing less overwhelming.”

Jun just nods, appreciating the way you’re making things more approachable. 

You grab a blank sheet of paper and draw a quick, simple outline of the brain, labeling the major parts with clear, concise notes. “Let’s go over the basics𑁋the cerebrum, cerebellum, and brainstem. These are the main regions we need to understand before diving into all the nitty-gritty details. Is that okay?”

He nods again, moving back slightly closer so he can see what you’re drawing. 

“The cerebrum is the largest part of the brain and is responsible for higher brain functions like thinking, reasoning, and sensory processing,” You continue, pointing to the relevant part of your drawing. “It’s divided into the left and right hemispheres, and each one controls the opposite side of the body.”

Jun watches as you explain, occasionally nodding to show he’s following along. There’s something calming about the way you speak𑁋gentle, but confident, filled with poise. He tries to shake off the thought, reminding himself that he’s here to study, not to admire the way your eyes light up when you speak so passionately about a topic as ridiculous and complex as the damn brain. 

You’re so different from what people say. There’s no sign of the strict, no-nonsense TA everyone talks about. 

“...and that’s why the frontal lobe is so important for decision-making and problem-solving. I like comparing it to, let’s say, a CEO,” You explain. “It’s where a lot of our executive functions happen. Think of it as the brain’s ‘boss’ making the big decisions and planning.”

Jun blinks for a moment, snapping back to attention, quickly jotting down a note to make it seem like he was paying attention. He actually was, sort of. Somehow he’s lucky enough for you to not notice him being distracted (or you do, and he’s the one who didn’t notice). 

“Frontal lobe, right,” he mutters lowly, under his breath.

“The cerebellum is our little assistant to the CEO. It’s responsible for our movement, coordination, and balance,” You say, pointing to a spot on the sketch at the very back of the brain and above the brainstem. “Think of it as the brain’s quality control. It just makes sure that whatever movements we do are smooth and precise, so…” 

Nope. He still can’t detect those rumours that paint you as some sort of cold, calculated, and harsh TA. He spots not a single one of those in your demeanour. Briefly, he wonders whether or not those rumours bother you, if they’ve ever bothered you or made you feel misunderstood. Swiftly, though, he brushes those thoughts away𑁋he’s more focused on you than the material at hand. 

It’s hard not to look at you, in all honesty. 

“Junhui?” Your voice pulls him back to reality.

“Huh?” he responds, a little too quickly.

You tilt your head slightly, a small, knowing smile on your lips. “I asked if you’re ready to move on to the brainstem, or do you want to go over the cerebellum again?”

“Oh, um… no, I’m good,” he says, feeling his face heat up slightly. He hopes you don’t notice how flustered he is. “Let’s move on.”

You nod, satisfied with his answer, and continue your explanation, turning your attention to the next section of the brain. 

“The brainstem,” You begin, pointing to an area at the bottom of the brain with the pencil. “is like the brain's relay station. It connects the brain to the spinal cord and controls many of the body’s automatic functions, like breathing, heart rate, and digestion. Without it, our bodies wouldn't be able to function properly…”

Jun observes as you draw a line down the sketch, clearly marking the brainstem. He’s listening, or at least trying to, but his mind keeps drifting back to how comfortable this whole situation feels. He expected to be a nervous wreck, fumbling through explanations and possibly embarrassing himself in front of you. But instead, he finds himself oddly at ease, more focused on how you’re able to break down the complex information into something so much more digestible.

“Still with me?” You ask suddenly, looking up from your notes to meet his gaze.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m here,” Jun answers unsurely, sitting up a little straighter in his seat. He offers a small smile, hoping it masks his earlier distraction.

A flicker of amusement flashes in your eyes, and there’s a warmth in your expression that puts Jun further at ease. “Okay, great. We can continue then.”

The rest of the session goes by surprisingly rather quickly. You guide Jun through the material, your explanations helping Jun absorb the information more effectively than the regular in-class lectures. It makes him think about how great you would be as a professor, or anything in the medical field. Everything just seems to flow out of you seamlessly as you discuss various brain functions and their relevance to anatomy and dissections.

As Jun is finishing up the last of some notes, you ask, “Would you mind if I write you a little sticky note? To tell you what to look over when you’re reviewing on your own?” 

Jun looks up, a bit surprised but grateful. “That would be good, thank you.” 

You stand up to retrieve a sticky note from Professor’s Lee desk, before returning back to Jun and writing down: 

Review over neuroanatomy and its functions! •ᴗ•  

Finally, you plaster the sticky note at the corner of the page in his notebook. 

There’s a comfortable silence that follows as you both gather your belongings. It feels like a small victory for Jun𑁋he not only survived the session but actually, in a way, enjoyed it.

As you both stand up, ready to leave, you glance over at him.

“By the way, I don’t think you need all that perfume on,” You say, a hint of laughter in your voice.

Jun’s eyes widen, caught off-guard. Shit. “Oh, uh𑁋yeah, that…”

You chuckle softly, shaking your head. “It’s not that it’s bad, it’s just… a little overwhelming. Maybe tone it down next time?”

Jun’s face flushes as he scratches the back of his neck awkwardly. “Sorry, I uh… was rushing and just grabbed what I could find. I didn’t mean to overdo it.”

“You’re all good,” You reassure him, still smiling as you sling your bag over your shoulder. “Just a little heads-up. So, anyway, for the next session…”

Next session? His jaw nearly drops to the floor at your casual mention of a next session. 

“...I think I’ll try and set up a little lesson plan we can reference off of… probably review over the cardiovascular system…”

“You… You don’t have to do all that,” Jun interjects. “It sounds like a lot of work.” 

You dismiss him off with a reassuring wave. “It’s no trouble. I think it’ll help to have a structured plan for us to follow. It’ll make sure we cover everything orderly.” 

Jun zips his mouth shut and just nods in agreement, unable to hide the small smile tugging at the corners of his lips, biting it back when he hangs his head down to the ground. When he perks back up, he finds you over at Professor Lee’s desk, sorting through some papers before organising the stack and preparing to finally leave. He opens his mouth, but the words he wanted to say stick to his tongue.

“I’ll see you later?” Jun calls out to you instead, his voice bouncing off the walls of the lecture hall. 

You glance up at him in acknowledgment. “I’ll see you later, Junhui.”

He takes a visible gulp.

“Jun,” he suddenly says, saying it as if he were correcting you, which in a way, he is, but it comes out a bit awkwardly. “You can call me just Jun, if you’d like.” 

A wave of surprise washes over your features, before ultimately fading into a pleasant smile.

“Alright, Just Jun,” You reply, tilting your head slightly. “I’ll see you later.” 

One could probably say you’re a party pooper. Not necessarily intentionally, but instead of filling up your college experience with going to parties and social events, you find yourself buried within pages of textbooks. Your weekends aren’t filled with the chaoticness of drinking and loosening up; rather, they consist of quiet study sessions in your room and creating new lecture material.

You’re not avoiding fun𑁋at least, that’s what you always tell yourself𑁋you’re just focused on achieving your academic goals.

It’s a routine carved ever since you were younger, your parents constantly instilling that education is the key to success, and you’ve taken that message to heart. From an early age, you learned to prioritise your studies over everything else. As you grew older, you carried that mindset with you, where you’ve become known among your peers as the diligent, dependable student and TA who always has their priorities straight.

Your schedule is precise, your assignments are always turned in on time, always prepared for every quiz and exam, and your grades reflect the countless hours you’ve spent studying. It’s a reputation you’re proud of, but it also comes with a certain level of pressure𑁋pressure to maintain those high standards, to never let yourself slip.

You sit back in the seat, satisfied after crafting a proper lesson plan and organising your materials for your next tutoring session. When you glance over at your planner to see who was coming in today, the name that you spot is𑁋

Knock. 

You glance up from your planner and over to the door. “Come in!”

It takes a few moments for the door to swing in, and the tall figure that steps through is unmistakable𑁋light brown hair slightly fluffed out, a half-opened black backpack hanging on his shoulders, and an oversized hoodie that appeared way more comfortable than it needed to be.

“Jun?” You look at the time on your phone. “You’re here early.” 

“Oh, yeah…” Jun runs a hand through his tousled hair. “I thought showing up early could give us some extra time, maybe. Unless… unless you’re still busy?” 

You shake your head. “Don’t worry, you’re fine. Just give me a few minutes and then we can start?”

“Yeah. Take all the time that you need.” 

Once again, it’s only the two of you in the lecture hall. He ponders if you’ve tutored any students before him today, hovering near you as he watches you sort through some papers and adjust your notes. The room is quiet except for the faint rustle of papers and the soft hum of the air conditioning. Jun can sense his curiosity growing within him, making him fidget with the strap of his backpack. 

“So, uh… how long have you been a TA for Professor Lee?” 

You pick your head up from your papers, fingers resting at the edge of the desk. 

“Since the beginning of the year,” You reply. “I got recommended to him by some previous professors, and I guess I couldn’t say no to the opportunity.”

Jun nods slowly, thoughtfully. “Do you like it? Being a TA, I mean.”

You consider his question for a moment, feeling a bit reflective as you answer, “I do, actually. It’s hard but rewarding, you know? I get to help students understand the material better, and I learn a lot in the process too. It’s a good balance between teaching and learning, I would say.”

Jun takes in your words attentively, peeking his eyes toward you with an almost shy smile. There’s a quiet admiration in the way he looks at you that you don’t notice, as if he’s trying to understand how you manage to keep everything together so well. Then a moment of silence fills the space between you two, not uncomfortable, maybe a bit awkward on his end, but more contemplative.

Jun shifts this abominable weight pressing down on him from one foot to the other. He’s not used to being in situations like this𑁋alone with someone who seems so put together, so sure of themselves. It’s both inspiring and a little intimidating. The silence seems to stretch, and you can see the gears turning in his head, like he’s on the verge of saying something but can’t quite find the right words.

“I guess I wonder how you manage it all so well,” he remarks timidly. “You’re always so organised and… on top of things. I’m curious how you do it.”

You purse your lips together into a thin line and simply shrug your shoulders. “I’ve always had high expectations for myself growing up and I guess it’s carried into everything I do now. It’s become second nature, really.” 

As Jun takes in your words, that sense of admiration seems to soften into a bit of worry. It’s amazing that you could handle so many responsibilities at once, but the more he thinks about it, the more it seems like a lot of stress and pressure to manage. He wonders if you ever feel overwhelmed or if it ever gets too much to handle at times. 

You probably do𑁋you’re human, after all𑁋and a twinge of concern snakes up his spine as he thinks about.

“Anyway, hm… I was thinking about going over the cardiovascular system for this session. What do you say?” You ask him.

Jun snaps out of his thoughts, walking briskly over towards the desk to take a seat. “Oh, yeah. That sounds good.” 

The session is just similar to last time: you begin by outlining the cardiovascular system, breaking it down into different sections just as you did with the brain, and using relatable analogies with associating each part with their functions.

“...so the heart has four chambers: the left and right atria plus the left and right ventricles,” You explain, pointing down to the drawing you made with the tip of your pencil. “The right side deals with deoxygenated blood, while the left side handles oxygenated blood. The heart’s valves make sure that blood flows in the correct direction. Think of it like… traffic signals.”

“Traffic signals…” Jun mutters to himself as he writes down notes. Knowing that this is all going on within his own body wraps around his mind uncomfortably.

As you continue explaining, there’s that light again that Jun detects in your eyes, as well as the subtle lift to your lips that makes your voice just a step higher. His gaze also follows your hands that you unknowingly maneuver when you talk, the movements graceful and expressive, like you’re bringing the material to life.

“Are you familiar with where all your pulse points are?” 

Jun lifts a brow, thinking for a second, before taking a finger down to his wrist. “I think so. There’s one here… on the wrist…”

“The radial artery.”

“Radial artery. Yeah.” Then he drags the tip of his finger up to his inner elbow. “There’s also one here. The brachial artery, right?”

“You got it.” 

He grins bashfully at that, though it’s quick to fade when he focuses again, pointing down to his leg. “There’s also two here. Femoral and… pop… Popliteal?”

“You’re right,” You confirm wholeheartedly, and Jun’s heart flutters in small victory. 

Jun then brings his hand back up, using two fingers to point to a spot on his neck. 

“And, uh… The one here on the neck. It’s…” He continues pressing down into his skin to find where he can feel his pulse, but your eyes on him is causing him to feel a bit self-conscious. “Uh…”

“The carotid artery. Right here.”

Before Jun has a chance to correct himself, you’re suddenly scooting closer to him in your chair, leaning in and extending an arm out towards him. The sudden contact of your fingers on the side of his neck makes his eyes widen and his breath to hitch. 

Your fingers rest gently on the side of his neck, just below his jawline, and for a brief moment, the world outside of the lecture hall seems to disappear. The visible swallow of his Adam’s apple isn’t hard to miss as he tries to focus on anything but the sensation of your hand on his neck.

Heat washes over his face, and he swears to himself that you could most definitely feel the way his pulse is running marathons under your touch. All of a sudden his tongue goes dry, his limbs go numb, and the way you’re so close to him makes it hard for him to properly think straight, let alone form any sort of coherent response.

Your eyes meet for a singular millisecond, too quick that Jun could have possibly been imagining it.

Pulling your hand away, you clear your throat soundly. “Try it.”

It takes Jun a moment to register you were talking to him, and he tentatively replaces the spot where your fingers were at with his own.

“Right here?” he asks.

“Mhm.” Your gaze roams over his concentrated face. “Apply a bit of pressure. That’s the carotid artery doing its work.” 

His pulse is certainly fast. The thought has him sinking into a pit of embarrassment. 

But he only nods, keeping his voice steady as he says, “Yeah, I feel it.”

“So whenever you want to count your heart rate, this is one of the places you can check,” You instruct. “You can just press down on that spot and count the number of beats you feel in 15 seconds. Then, multiply that number by four, and you’ll have your heart rate in beats per minute.”

Jun attempts to listen to his heart rate, but the attentive look you have on your face as you watch him makes it really hard to properly count. So he chooses to let his hand fall back down. He wouldn’t be able to calculate it with you here with him anyway. 

When the two of you meet eyes for the nth time, there’s a fleeting, almost electric moment of mutual awareness. None of you acknowledge it, yet it awkwardly lingers in the air. Warmth spreads across Jun’s chest, coupled with a nervous energy that makes his heart beat soar just a little faster.

You break the tension with an airy chuckle. “Are you ready to move on?” 

Jun blinks a few times, shaking off whatever awkwardness swirling around him, and nods quickly. “Yeah, I’m ready.”

By the time he gets back to his apartment later that evening and begins to unpack his things from his backpack, a small piece of pink paper flutters down to the floor like a feather, landing by his foot. It’s a sticky note, reading:

Good sesh today •ᴗ• Don’t forget to review!

“There’s no way I’m touching a brain.”

“Jun, you have to! You’ll be wearing gloves anyway𑁋”

“I cannot cut into a brain. That is gross,” Jun rebukes defensively, face scrunching up with stubborn refusal. 

“Jun, dissections are really important for anatomy,” You clarify calmly. “It’s part of the learning process.”

“Yeah, I… I know,” he mumbles defeatedly, almost shameful to admit. “I’m not that good with, uh… dead things. Like, couldn’t we look at diagrams or pictures instead? They’re less… squishy.” 

You smile amusedly at that, finding his squeamishness a bit endearing. But you straighten your posture and plaster on a reassuring look to your face. 

“I understand that it’s not for everyone,” You respond, a comforting tone to your voice. “But getting hands-on experience is really valuable. It’s one thing to see it in a book, but actually being able to identify the structures in real life makes a big difference in how you understand the material.”

Jun still looks apprehensive, but your words bring a sparkle of determination to his eyes. The idea of cutting into something that used to be alive still makes his stomach turn and the hairs on the back of his neck stick up, but he knows that you’re right. When are you not right?

“It just feels illegal,” Jun admits uneasily, a shudder running through him at the thought. “I don’t know if I can handle it.”

“That’s what I’m here for, remember?” You lightly nudge him in the arm with your elbow, attempting to lighten the mood. “We’re partners, after all.”

“Yeah, but…” There’s some hesitation, his gaze dropping down to his shoes. He lowers his voice as he speaks, “I want to show you that I’m capable of doing something…”

“Then we’ll start off slow, make you become familiar with everything,” You reason gently. “I know you’re not the only one who feels queasy by it, but you’ll have to face it. Facing your fears can help in conquering them, you know.” 

The corners of Jun’s lips tug up at that, mainly from the fact that you’re able to reassure him this effortlessly. He can’t tell if it’s exactly your words that eases up his nerves or if it’s simply your presence here with him right now thawing away the ice of his fears. Whatever it is, all he can really say is he likes knowing that you genuinely care.

And he likes knowing that you’re right next to him too.

“If I freak out,” he starts. “You’ll promise to help me out?”

Your lips draw into a thin line, a certain playfulness softening the features of your face. 

“No promises, but𑁋”

“Hey!”

“Study what we discussed today and then I’ll consider it.” There’s still a twinge of tease to your words, but the edges are roughened with a touch of sincerity. 

Jun just grins. How could anyone ever make up ridiculous rumours about you?

“Good game, man. Same time again next Saturday?”

Jun huffs out a winded breath, dabbing at the sweat that clings to his forehead with the edge of his shirt before taking a long chug out of the water bottle that Wonwoo tosses over to him. 

“Yeah. I’ll see you then,” he replies exhaustedly, taking another tip of water, feeling his muscles aching from the game. 

As his friends leave the basketball court, he starts to retrieve his own belongings, slinging his backpack and hoodie over his shoulder and starting his walk towards the bus stop so he could go back home. The sun has completely set at this point, the night sky now blanketing the city in a cool, comfortable darkness. The breeze that floats through the air relieves some of the tension in his body, cooling his skin after the intense game. Jun walks slowly, taking his time on the way to the bus stop, simply savouring the peacefulness of the evening.

He considers getting food for himself𑁋there’s a small convenience store that he spots at the corner of his eye, and his stomach rumbles at the thought. 

He changes direction and heads toward the store, the faint jingling of the door chime greeting him as he steps inside. The store is a cozy, cluttered space with a mix of snacks, drinks, and other essentials. He decides on grabbing a cold drink and some instant ramen that he can heat up when he gets home. And after purchasing, he heads back outside and continues his way to the bus stop.

Tapping his bus card on the scanner, Jun makes his way toward the back of the bus and settles into a seat closest to the window, the seat right next to him vacant. The bus was mostly empty, but everyone else was spread out in their own seats either dozing off, listening to music, or staring out the window. It’s quite nice, he must say.

The sounds of him crumpling his bag fills the still air of the bus as he waits for the bus to move, but the hissing of the doors opening perks his attention up. 

Out of all things, he certainly never expected to see the sight of you breathlessly climbing onto the bus, muttering apologies towards the bus driver as you scramble for your bus card in your wallet. Your backpack is about to slip off your shoulder, cheeks flushed from assuming all the running you did to get here, and a mask of tiredness that you wear on your face that isn’t hard to notice. Were you at campus? It’s almost ten at night. 

And out of all things, he didn’t expect for you to come over to him among the many empty seats in the bus. 

“Hey,” You greet him breathlessly, glancing down at the empty seat next to him. “Are you fine with me sitting here?” 

Jun blinks, before speedily adjusting himself, forcing his body more into the seat so you would have all the room that you wanted. He gives you a nod. 

Smiling faintly, you sit down right next to him, shoulder brushing against his. You settle your backpack on your lap and lean back a bit, finally allowing yourself to relax. The bus lurches, beginning to move forward. Jun lets his eyes wash over you.

“Did… you just come from campus?” he asks. 

You laugh awkwardly at that. “Yeah, I… I was studying.”

“You study this late at night on campus?”

“I do.” It’s a bit funny admitting that, you don’t know why. “Sorta lost track of time, I guess.” 

Jun keeps a fixed look on you, as if there was some anomaly within your words, but he knows you’re telling the truth. He just can’t believe that anyone would stay on campus so late, plus you look way too tired, like you could pass out any second. Some worry flows down his body. 

“That sounds… exhausting,” he says, concern edging his voice. “Are you sure you’re okay?” 

You glance at him, eyes softening slightly. There’s something about him asking that tugs at your heart. “I’m fine. It’s not unusual for me to be up late studying. I’m used to it.”

Jun feels his fingers twitch around the bag in his grasp. “I see.”

You let your head fall slightly. “Thank you though.”

He faces you curiously. “For what?”

“Just…” For being here? For asking if I’m okay? “I don’t know. Thank you.”

He doesn’t know why you’re thanking him; if anything he should be the one thanking you.

“Oh.” A small smile appears on his lips. “You’re welcome.”

He feels weird. Not in a bad sense𑁋far from that, actually. It’s basically his first time ever interacting with you that isn’t on school grounds, and in a way right now, he isn’t the student and you’re not the TA. He’s simply Jun, and you are… well, you. You’re just two people sharing a late bus ride, and Jun is oddly grateful for the chance to see this side of you𑁋tired, a little vulnerable, but still yourself nonetheless.

The bus rumbles lightly. Silence swirling the air around the two of you. Jun glances at your profile, noticing how your eyes flutter shut for a brief second before snapping open again. His fingers twitch again, wanting to do something more𑁋maybe offer you his jacket, or ask if you need anything𑁋but he holds himself back.

The thought of pushing himself to exhaustion like that feels foreign. But he knows you well enough𑁋or at least, he’s seen you enough𑁋to know you’re driven, always working hard, sometimes too hard. He doesn’t know how to tell you that it’s okay to slow down.

“Y/N?” he calls out quietly.

You face him with a cute, sleepy look. “Hm?”

“You’re falling asleep.”

You giggle lazily at that, the sound unguarded and relaxed. “Sorry.” 

“It’s okay,” he says softly. “You can close your eyes. When’s your stop?”

Gazing at the window for a few moments, you take note of the familiar surroundings that the bus passes by. “It should be the next one.” 

Before you can settle back into the seat, Jun quickly adds, suddenly feeling brave, “You can… lean on my shoulder if you want.”

You hesitate for a moment, then give him a drowsy, grateful smile. “I think I’d like that.”

With a sigh, you allow your head to rest against his shoulder, and Jun could only imagine how uncomfortable his own shoulder might be compared to a pillow, but he doesn’t mind, and neither do you as well𑁋at least he thinks you don’t.

Your eyes are closed when Jun leans down to sneak a glance at your face, your features softened with exhaustion. There’s the faintest sight of a smile to your lips, and it makes his own curve up slightly too. His heart stirs in his chest, all while attempting to fully compose himself so you wouldn’t be disturbed. 

As his eyes drift back outside, he leans his own head on the window, watching the cityscape pass by. There’s fatigue crawling up his body too, but he forces himself to stay awake so that he knows when your stop is approaching. He casts glimpses down to you to make sure you’re still comfortable, but every time he looks at you, his heart seems to do a little jump, a little flutter in his chest. 

Jun knows he shouldn’t hope for anything more than this moment, knows he shouldn’t let himself fall into dreams of what-ifs, but he can’t help it. Admitting to himself that he likes you is bizarre, almost too bold for him to fully accept. Yet here you are, leaning against him, breathing softly in your dazed state as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. 

And maybe, just maybe, he thinks, it could be.

You could tell there was something off about Jun today, and it seems to bother you a little more than you expect. 

He just didn’t seem to be… paying attention. You would explain something to him, and he’d reply with a small hum of acknowledgment before drifting off into a bit of a daydreaming state. Perhaps his mind was clouded and it wasn’t your place to ask, or maybe he was just tired. Regardless, you knew that it wouldn’t get either of you progress through this tutoring session, especially when you’re trying to instruct him about what to expect for the dissections.

“Jun?” You snap your finger in front of his face, and he immediately perks up. “You got all that down?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah. Sorry, the probe…” He trails off, looking a bit lost. “Uh, can you repeat it?”

“The probe is used to explore and identify different anatomical structures,” You explain slowly. “But remember to be careful with it. Tissues are very delicate, so one wrong move could cause damage.” 

You watch quietly as he writes down the notes, his head resting on his as if he’s struggling to keep his eyes open.

“I saw you fall asleep today in class.”

Jun looks back up at you, eyes widening as if what he had done was some sort of crime. He suddenly appears more awake than ever.

“Crap, I… I’m sorry,” he mutters in apology, face flushing with embarrassment. “I knew you were lecturing since Professor Lee wasn’t here today, but I just… I don’t know. I couldn’t keep my eyes open that well. I’m really sorry.”

He could only assume the worst𑁋that you’re mad at him for falling asleep, when in reality he had stayed up late the night before to review over the material the two of you have covered so far during your sessions. But when your face softens into a look of understanding, he seems to relax. Just slightly. 

“Jun, it’s fine, really. I just wanted to make sure you’re okay,” You reassure him gently. “Trust me, you’re not in trouble and I’m not mad.”

He swallows down the lump in your throat. “Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

“Like really sure?”

“One thousand percent.”

“I’m not convinced.” A sly grin spreads across Jun’s face. What a dork.

“Unfunny,” You huff, before taking a seat right next to him and flipping through the pages in your lesson plan. 

Once again, Jun props an elbow on the table and leans his head on his hand, a playful smirk lingering on his face as he watches you. You feel his eyes on you. 

“It sort of gave me a little glimpse into your life, you know.” 

You glance up, intrigued. “Yeah? And what did you take from that?”

“That… I really cannot and will never be on your level of studying,” Jun admits sheepishly. He seems to crawl into himself a bit more as he continues hesitantly, “and, uh, made me admire you a little bit more too.”

You freeze at that, pausing mid-flipping through a page in your planner as his words float through the air. Admire… you? It wasn’t something you ever anticipated hearing from him𑁋ever anticipated to see him this forward𑁋especially not today when he seemed so out of it.

You clear your throat softly, trying to act nonchalant. “You admire me?”

Jun chuckles softly, the sound a little awkward as he tries to ease the tension. “Well, who wouldn’t?”

He’s probably digging himself into a bit of a hole right now, perhaps overstepping a small boundary of what was supposed to be just a casual tutoring session. But really, despite these sessions honestly really helping with understanding the material, he’s mainly here because… well… he gets to spend time with you. 

“Sorry, I-I mean… I made this weird, didn’t I?” Jun swiftly corrects himself, face flushing deeper with each word that leaves him. “I guess I just want to thank you for pushing me to do better. I’ve always… kind of admired that about you for a while now.”

Even you momentarily forget what you wanted to discuss with him for the session, a surge of warmth shooting through your body. The only sounds you could hear right now are the branches outside hitting the window from the wind and the ticking of the clock on the wall. The room was quiet, filled with an awkward, yet comfortable tension that neither of you seemed to know how to break.

“I’m glad to hear that,” You tell him. “It means a lot that you feel that way.” 

Relief and apprehension hugs around Jun, as if unsure whether he should say anything more or go back to tutoring. But he thinks he’s already said enough𑁋at this point his tired brain nearly made him confess his feelings, and that would be utterly stupid of him. 

“But you should really learn how to rest,” he suddenly says firmly.

You laugh that off way too easily. “You know that I can’t𑁋”

“I know, but… come on, just rest for a little bit,” Jun insists. “At least for a few minutes.”

“You’re seriously telling me to rest while I’m here to tutor you?” You lift a brow, almost teasingly.

The way he only nods and gazes at you with pleading eyes almost resembling a cat stretching out for attention makes it almost impossible to resist. And you would hate to admit that yeah, maybe you do push yourself way too much, that all the strenuous effort you put into studying is now starting to take a noticeable toll on you. At the moment, rest does sound really nice.

“My friends and I are planning a hangout this weekend at my place, if you’d like to join us. You… You don’t have to if you don’t want to, or if you’re not into that kind of stuff,” Jun informs you sheepishly. “It’s not a lot of us too, but if you ever want to just… unwind, you know, you could stop by. We aren’t doing anything too wild, just a chill get-together. They’re all cool, I swear.”

You consider his offer. Again, you were never much of a party person nor ever gave a crap about that sort of stuff, but the thought of taking a break from your routine is a bit... enticing, to say the least.

“I’ll think about it. Thank you,” You say with a grateful smile, finally giving in. “Give me a few minutes to tidy up?”

Jun watches for a few moments as you quickly organise through your notes and gather up the loose papers that have accumulated on the table, standing up and heading to the front of the lecture hall to put away the rest of the materials that you won’t need for the session. 

As he waits for you to finish, Jun sets aside his own stuff, folds his arms and places them on the table, slowly guiding his head to rest on top. He closes his eyes, taking advantage of the opportunity to rest as much as his body craves.

By the time you get back, you catch a glimpse of Jun’s relaxed form in his seat, and your heart does a little flip in your chest. The corners of your lips tug up unknowingly into a soft smile as you settle into the seat cautiously next to him, feeling a wave of exhaustion hitting you all at once.

It’s rare that you let yourself go these days, but with Jun here, it seems easier to let your guard down, even for just a few minutes. 

Without much thought you let your head rest gently on your own arms, finding yourself staring at the front lecture hall, before ultimately, moving your head so that you were facing Jun. You’ve never seen him this close before, drawn into his features for a moment or two𑁋over his closed eyes and the small moles that pepper his cheek and one particular spot above his lips, which were curled up slightly. Contentment warms you like a blanket as you let your eyes drift to a close.

Unbeknownst to you, Jun slowly peeks his eyes open, being met with the sight of you resting so peacefully and comfortably beside him. A sense of calm takes over the vast lecture hall as he simply watches you, even feeling brave enough to lightly brush a strand of hair away from your face with his finger, before quickly pulling back when he catches your nose scrunching a little in your sleep. His heart swells even more.

He decides on settling back into his own arms, taking one last glance at you before drifting back into light sleep. 

“You’re way too smiley to be going to a tutoring session,” Chan points out as he catches Jun about to leave. “Isn’t it like your third time alone this week? Last week you went twice…”

Jun snorts annoyedly at that. “Yeah, and?”

“We’re just saying you’re way too happy to be going to tutoring, man,” Soonyoung continues on, an edge of suspicion to his words. “Did you find out the meaning of life? Figure out why our bodies cause us to shit and piss or why the earth goes around the sun?”

“I’d be happy to answer that question if you’re curious,” Jun states wryly. 

Soonyoung scrunches his face and shakes his head. “Please don’t.” 

His roommate only observes as Jun stuffs his feet into his Converse, which looked to be at the end of its life. Minghao comes out moments later, toothbrush in his mouth with bits of foam to the corners of his lips. Along with Soonyoung and Chan, the three of them watch as Jun finishes lacing up his shoes, his good mood unwavering.

“I think I have an answer to that question,” Minghao says, voice somewhat muffled.

Soonyoung faces the younger boy. “The piss or the earth one?”

“He has a crush,” Minghao states flatly, a subtle smirk creeping onto his face despite the toothbrush still dangling from his lips.

“A crush?” Soonyoung’s eyes widen as he exchanges a glance with Chan, the two of them looking like they were about to combust any second. “A crush on that scary TA?”

“They’re not scary!” Jun protests, face reddening hearing his own loud voice, secretly hoping to make some sort of quick escape before his friends could pry any further into his dry love life, but he knows he won’t be able to get them off his ass. “So what if I have a crush on them?”

Soonyoung’s jaw drops to the floor at that, before bursting into laughter. “‘So what’? You’re totally into them!” He starts bouncing on his toes, a grin stretching across his face. “You’re in loooove with the scary TA! This is gold.”

Jun could seriously strangle all of his roommates right now. He runs a hand through his hair and glances at the door, regretting opening his mouth. Was he seriously that obvious? “You guys are blowing this way out of proportion.” 

“Bro, you’re blushing so hard right now,” Chan chimes in with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Don’t even try to deny it.”

Minghao chuckles, finally pulling the toothbrush out of his mouth. “It’s obvious. You don’t study like that for just anyone.”

Jun’s face turns an even deeper shade of red. “I𑁋okay, fine! Maybe I like them a little bit, but it’s not a big deal! I’m just trying to do well in class. Now, can I leave?” 

It takes one last torturous minute of teasing before Jun shoots his roommates with annoyed looks and heads out of the apartment.

Normally at nine o’clock, you would most likely be in the campus library studying until your eyes go dry, or in your own place with textbooks sprawled over your bed. But this time, you find yourself right in front of the address Jun sent you𑁋his address, specifically.

You’d spent the past few days thinking about his invitation, and despite some initial hesitation, you may be looking forward to this little break from your routine. Because according to Jun from a text he sent you the night before along with the address: it’s what you deserve.

Your heart still does a little jump when you think about it still.

[09:08 | y/n] Hey Jun! I’m here by the way

Your phone vibrates right away.

[09:09 | just jun] WHAT omg

[09:09 | just jun] sorry i’m coming out right now!!!

There’s a figure that emerges from a door, waving to you from above. You give out a small wave as you start to make yourself comfortable on the front steps of the building. Jun hurries down the stairs, looking both relieved and a bit flustered as he reaches you.

“Hey, I…” His eyes roam over you from head-to-toe. “I didn’t think you’d actually show up.” 

You offer a tentative smile. “Well, I figured, you know? Thought it would be nice to stop by for a little bit. Plus you live closer than I thought.”

Jun’s face brightens, the relief in his own grin oozing its way into your heart, and he gestures for you to follow him back to his place.

Just as he promised, the gathering was quite small. Jun introduces you to his roommates𑁋Minghao, Soonyoung, and Chan are their names (Soonyoung and Chan look oddly more excited to see you, for some reason)𑁋and two others in his year. You recognise Wonwoo, who is a TA from the English department, and the other is Jihoon, whose name had been tossed around quite frequently during your time in university.

Overall, the vibes have been quite laid-back, and the apartment has been warm and inviting so far.

“Do you want something to drink?” Jun asks as he leads you towards the kitchen, where some food and snacks were sprawled across the counter. “There’s water, soda, and um… some alcohol too.”

Your eyes roam over the assortment on the counter, gaze lingering on the bottles of alcohol. For some reason the idea of relaxing and letting loose feels particularly appealing tonight, and you can hardly remember the last time you had a proper drink of… anything. 

“I’ll take some alcohol,” You answer, suddenly feeling a bit adventurous; it even surprises Jun. 

Jun pulls one of the bottles and pours you a generous amount before handing it to you, the tips of his fingers brushing against yours as you find yourself settling down in a seat near Wonwoo and Jihoon. 

Soonyoung and Chan come into view a few minutes later, and they’re still looking at you as if you’ve come in with a second head.

“You’re not scary,” Chan claims randomly, scanning you up and down with his eyes closely.

You lift a brow and look behind you, thinking he was talking to someone, before turning back to him. 

“Me?” You point to yourself. “Scary?” 

Soonyoung takes a sip of his own drink before saying, “Yeah, dude, I mean… There used to be a lot of rumours spread about you being like, mean and stuff, you know? I’m talking about people saying you were super strict, always serious, and that if anyone messed up in class, you’d roast them alive.”

You almost want to laugh at that. Sure, you’ve heard plenty of those rumours before and never really let it get to you, or had the time to straight up dismiss them, but you didn’t think people were still clinging onto those thoughts nowadays. 

“Did you expect me to show up with devil horns and a pitchfork?" You joke, finally allowing yourself to laugh, shaking your cup in amusement. “Wow, I didn’t realise I was so terrifying. Maybe I should start living up to it now.”

Soonyoung lets out a hearty laugh, almost choking on his drink. “Please, no! We’re all just barely surviving as it is.”

“Nah, you’re good as you are. If anything I’m glad to see that the stuff people have said aren’t true,” Chan adds in.

An exaggerated gasp leaves Soonyoung. “Oh my, God, wait! Does this mean we’re friends now?” His excitement is so over-the-top that you can’t help but laugh too. 

“I don’t know. Maybe,” You tease with a faint smirk, shrugging. “If you behave.”

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Soonyoung declares, grinning ear to ear as Chan gives him an enthusiastic high five. His face is already turning the slightest bit of red from the alcohol. “Jun, you’re in good hands!”

In the kitchen, you catch Jun gazing over his shoulder and towards his friends. And when his eyes land on you, he shoots you a brief smile before quickly taking his eyes away, but the tips of his ears being red doesn’t go unnoticed when he turns away.

As the night continues, you find yourself letting loose, more than you’ve ever done recently. You find yourself easily getting along with the lively atmosphere of Jun and all of his friends. You don’t really know how many drinks you’ve taken at this point in time, how many refills you’ve been offered, but the buzz you feel is pleasant and warm, your inhibitions slowly but surely melting away. Laughter tumbles out of you as if it was the most natural thing in the world, almost to the point you feel your chest physically ache.

Occasionally, from the side, Jun quietly watches you. He can feel his own mood lifting with every smile that finds its way on your face. It’s almost as if he’s looking at a completely different person𑁋someone entirely the opposite from the studious TA he’s been used to this entire time.

But the second he sees you stumble slightly when you come out from a bathroom break, a pang of worry hits him.

“You okay?” he asks you when you nearly run into him, making him circle his arms around you out of habit in case you might fall. However, you’re somehow so close to him that he can feel the warmth of you through his clothes. Your cheeks are flushed, and you’re grinning lazily up at him, the effects of the alcohol clearly taking their toll.

“Oh, doing lovely, um…” You assure him, voice wobbly as you clear your throat. “The alcohol was awesome. I haven’t… I haven’t drank like this in such a long time. It feels sooooo nice.” 

You nearly stumble into him again as you attempt to move past him, and he’s quick as the Flash to grab you by the shoulders, his hands squeezing tightly around your forearm. 

“I think you should sit down, Y/N.” 

“Bu-But I don’t want to!” 

A playful pout spreads across your face as he carefully leads you back to the quiet kitchen, away from whatever version of charades the others have put on in the middle of the living room.

“You’ve drank too much,” Jun points out worriedly. “Do you want me to take you home? I can walk𑁋”

“What are you? My… my boss or something? I’m supposed to be the one in control here! I’m… I’m the one making the decisions, not you!” You protest, a weak, half-hearted attempt at establishing your authority as you knead the fabric of his shirt into your fists. 

Did you have to be so cute when you’re drunk? Though Jun is fast to shake those thoughts away and focus more on making sure you’re okay, having to bite the bottom of his lip to conceal an incoming, endearing grin at your silly antics. 

“Come on, let me get you some water and then I’ll take you home, okay?” Jun offers, and you give him a tight-lipped smile. 

“But I am home,” You slur lowly, circling a finger in front of his face, close enough you may jab him in the eye. “I’m home here… with you…”

Jun seriously doesn’t know how he would be able to dismiss those words that left your mouth, even in your inebriated state. It doesn’t help that you’re also looking up at him with half-lidded eyes and a dreamy smile, like the world is spinning and yet he’s the only one keeping you steady. 

“Let’s go. I’m taking you home,” Jun says as he snatches up a bottle of water and slowly coaxes you towards the door, not before announcing to his friends as well, who all seem too drunk to even care anyway.

The second the cool air meets your skin and the cold water flows down your throat, you seem a little more lucid, but not entirely. You still clung an arm around Jun’s own arm, which was hanging loosely and awkwardly to the side, your steps a bit uneven as you walk down the street together.

Jun holds his breath every time your body knocks into his side, afraid you might lose balance, but you somehow manage to stay upright𑁋barely. The warmth of your arm wrapped around his doesn’t go unnoticed.

“Hey, Y/N𑁋”

“Shhhhh,” You suddenly hiss, making Jun shut his mouth. “You’re too loud.”

Jun hangs his head down in slight guilt. “Sorry.”

“Hmm, isokay,” You mutter, tightening a grip on his and nearly causing Jun himself to stumble. “You know, you’re always so… nice. It’s kinda weird.” 

Jun tilts his head, somewhat confused by your drunken logic. He glances at you, catching the way your cheeks are shaded with a rosy hue and the warmness to your hazy eyes. 

“Weird?” he repeats curiously.

“Yeah…” You draw out the word clumsily, shifting your eyes towards him, gaze lingering on him a little longer than usual. “It’s like you’re not real sometimes.”

“You’re holding onto me.” Jun shakes his arm, and you still carry a tight grip on his arm, fingers digging lightly into the material of his sleeve. “I think I’m very real.”

“I know,” You mumble, scrunching your nose endearingly, as if you still don't believe him. “But you barely know me.” 

There’s a few moments of contemplation that passes by between the two of you. Your steps have somehow managed to sync with each other, the streetlights above casting down a soft glow on the pavement below, and the quiet night feels oddly… intimate. 

“Maybe.” Jun shrugs, voice low and soft. “But I like what I know so far.” 

Now it’s your turn to grow silent, a wave of realisation cutting through your inebriated thoughts. Your grip goes from loose to tight on Jun’s arm, your chest and heart feeling heavier than it did moments ago, and it certainly was not because of the alcohol.

Your mind is practically aching with all these thoughts, aching with the urge to do something about it, and the way Jun’s side profile is illuminated under the streetlight doesn’t help the situation at all.

“It’s funny, because I… I would see you come into class. And…” You let out a giggle. “I don’t know. My first thought was always that you were cute. Hmm, maybe dreamy too? Yeah, dreamy… That’s a silly word.” 

Before Jun can say anything to that, the words seem to tumble out of you. 

“...I’d see you fall asleep in the back of the class, or come late to lecture, and I’d think you were cute seeing you so panicked… And when you asked me to tutor you, I was so happy. It’s just𑁋I-I don’t know.” A brief pause, before you continue, “Is this what liking someone is?” 

Jun doesn’t notice how much his steps have faltered, his voice and own words getting caught somewhere between his throat and his heart. There’s a mix of panic, disbelief, and excitement flowing through him, almost too much he can’t quite process going from emotion to the other. However, how the hell does he respond when the person he’s been developing feelings for says something like that so openly?

“Shit, I’ve… I’ve made this weird, haven’t I?” You give yourself a light facepalm, before carding a hand through your hair. A yawn starts to leave you. “I’m just all over the place right now, I’m sorry…”

Jun wants to say something, needs to say something, but he stumbles over his words. “I… Y/N, I𑁋”

Before he can finish his sentence, you trip slightly, and he instinctively pulls you closer, catching you with both hands. A wholehearted round of laughter tumbles out of you, resting your head on his shoulder for a brief moment, and for a split second, everything feels still. His heart races faster than ever.

He lets you take the lead on the way back to your apartment complex, feeling as if he had been walking on eggshells the entire time. The buzz of the alcohol running its laps through you has seemed to soften, and if anything, you’re more than ready to sink into your bed for the night. Although there’s comfortable quietness in the air now, Jun can’t stop replaying all the words you’ve said to him tonight alone.

Before he can fully process everything, you come to an abrupt stop just outside your building, turning to look at him.

You stare at him for a moment, eyes roaming over his face as if you’re trying to commit everything to memory. Then, without thinking, you step up to him and press a kiss to his cheek. It’s quick, fleeting, the gesture so unexpected it sends a rush of heat flooding up his neck and straight to the tips of his ears. He’s practically on fire, at this point. 

When you pull back, there’s a bashful smile playing at your lips. “Goodnight, Jun.”

You don’t think you can ever look at Jun in the eyes without wanting to sink into the ground, because each time he comes into view, it reminds you of the absolute idiot you put on show for him last weekend. It’s harder to pay attention when your hands seem to touch every given opportunity. You just have to make it through one last tutoring session before the big dissections later that week.

“So, um, we’ll use the forceps to clamp and separate through the tissues,” Jun explains, pointing towards the dissection guide displayed on the table, still feeling a tad bit queasy at the thought of it, even if the dissection pan was empty. “Then the scalpel will be used to cut on the incision lines we marked.”

“That’s right. You got it,” You say with a small smile, briefly casting a glance towards him, watching the way he adjusts the goggles on his face. 

The two of you decided on running through the dissection for practice, focusing instead on the procedural steps and techniques. It’s been smooth-sailing so far𑁋Jun looks more confident and comfortable as he walks through each step𑁋and you’re positive that the actual lab will go well.

On the other hand, you both can’t deny the awkwardness thickening through the room, drifting within the crevices of even the most subtle interactions. 

“Alright, so once we’ve done that, we’ll… uh, we’ll…” Jun’s voice trails off as he fumbles slightly with the scalpel, trying to decide between placing it on the tray or handing it to you, his gloved fingers brushing against yours again as you grab it from him.

“Sorry,” You both blurt out at the same time, voices mixing into one.

As you both share an embarrassed laugh, a few moments of silence follows. It seems to dissipate the tension in the air. Some of it, at least.

Jun clears his throat. “Y/N, I𑁋”

“It’s fine,” You assure calmly. “Let’s just keep going.” 

“I… Okay.” His shoulders slump in a pit of defeat as he fixes his attention back down towards the task at hand. “Can you, uh… pass me the probe?”

You nod and hand it over to him, trying to attentively listen as he explains the function of the tool and how it would be used for the lab, adding any feedback along the way. You’re surprised at how easily you fall back into a comfortable rhythm, as if the moments from earlier had ceased to exist, as if that night and your stupidity didn’t happen, but only you both know about the unacknowledged elephant in the room.

The rest of the practice goes by without any more mishaps. The next thing you know, you’re pulling off your gloves and taking off your safety goggles as Jun sets the dissection tray away. By the time he returns, he’s surprised to see you already grabbing your belongings like you’re ready to leave.

Jun swallows down the nervous lump lodged in his throat. “Y/N, wait.”

You pause in the middle of stuffing some notebooks inside your backpack, already feeling the apprehension snaking up your spine as you face him.

“Can… Can we talk?” Jun asks hesitantly.

A sigh leaves you. “Look, that was really dumb of me, I get it. I shouldn’t have… kissed you on the cheek like that and said all those weird things. It was impulsive and I was drunk. I’m sorry, I should’ve known my limits, or maybe just have not come at all𑁋”

“I was really happy that you came,” Jun interrupts, a voice almost too loud in the quiet, empty lab room. He rubs his gloved hands together nervously. “And, um, the kiss... I liked it. It was, well… kind of nice.”

You really can’t tell if his words are making you feel any better or worse, if the hesitation on his side makes you want to sink more into the ground or feel a bit of hope. Regardless, it’s hard to ignore the warmth growing in your face as your fingers tighten around the strap of your backpack. 

“I guess what I’m trying to say is that I like you too, and I wanted to finally tell you that before you left my place. But then things got a little messy and it was a bit overwhelming, so I wanted to take you home because you looked like you were about to𑁋”

“Jun, just…” You chime in ruefully, clearly not wanting to relive your stupidity. “Go back a little. You like me too?”

Jun takes in a deep, slow breath.

“Yes,” he says firmly. “Holy shit. I can’t believe I said that.” 

The laughs that leave you two sound more freeing in a way, more effortless, like the thick, heavy fog that settled around the room has been lifted, and for the first time in days, everything is more clearer. 

The carefree grin that Jun catches to your features nearly forces him to step up towards you, but he holds back. Instead, he thinks the sight of you looking so naturally happy is something he could cherish for a very, very long time.

“So, uh…” he starts, shooting a sheepish glance down at his shoes before meeting your gaze once more. “We’re okay?”

You only nod.

“We’re okay,” You confirm softly. “Maybe more than that.” 

As you finish getting ready to leave, you turn back to Jun, who nearly drops the dissection pan in his hands. 

“I have a meeting to go to right now,” You tell him. “But afterwards, I could… text you?” 

His face brightens expectantly, attempting to keep the excitement coursing through him at bay.  “Yeah, yeah, of course. Um… have a good meeting.” 

He’s cute. And silly. And weird. But you wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Before you finally leave the lab room, you take a leap of faith and turn back around, heading straight towards Jun. He’s in the middle of taking off his goggles when you find yourself standing back in front of him, and a mischievous grin etches across your face. Jun takes a few steps back, his ass nearly stumbling into the table behind him.

“One more thing.” You reach up and to gently tug the goggles off his face, and the contact of your fingers to his hair has Jun bracing himself for doomsday. Your breath fans against his skin for a moment, and when you pull away, you’re holding up the goggles towards him. “You were wearing these upside down the entire time.”

Jun chokes on air, and you let out a giggle.

Shit.

Jun cannot focus right now.

The goggles feel uncomfortable on his face, the gloves make his skin feel clammy, the uncomfortable, pungent smell of formaldehyde fills the lab room and his nostrils. Not to mention that there’s a goddamn sheep brain sitting on the metal pan in front of him. 

Perhaps he can call it quits now𑁋take the zero for the lab and run for the hills, drop out of university, become a nomad in the countryside and never have to touch any sort of assignment again. In his mind right before the dissection starts, it really doesn’t seem like a bad idea. Not a bad idea at all…

“Jun?”

He snaps his eyes back at you. You’re wearing your own pair of gloves and goggles, positioning the dissection tools on the table, eyebrows raised in worry. 

“Are you good? We’re about to start,” You tell him. “You look a little pale.”

He blinks a few times, trying to compose and mentally ready himself, acting like he hasn’t just spent the last few minutes imagining an escape plan abandoning all forms of education. “Yeah, I… I’m good.”

“You good to start?” You ask, and the concern he senses in your voice makes his heart soften. “Or do you want me to take over first?’ 

There’s that offer again, the one he knows he should probably accept for the sake of his sanity, but there’s also a part of him that doesn’t want to back out now. Not when he’s finally managed to clear the air between the two of you, when things are more comfortable than they’ve been in weeks. 

Jun exhales, shaking the tenseness out of his body. This is it. Glancing around the room, he notices that other students have already started their dissections with ease. He looks down at the sheep brain again, feeling that queasiness rising, but just your presence right next to him seems to settle down his nerves way more than it should.

He steels himself, trying to cling to that feeling instead of the growing discomfort in his stomach. He can do this. It’s just a brain. A sheep brain, he reminds himself, as if that makes it any better.

Letting out one last breath for good measure, he reaches for the scalpel. 

“I’m good,” he says, more to himself than to you. “Let’s do this.” 

His hand quivers as he leans in towards the sheep brain, its colour slightly pinkish and grey. His nose crinkles the closer he gets to it, and the second he lightly grazes the scalpel along the surface of the brain, he can’t help but wince. At his side, he feels your shoulder make contact with his, and helps ground him a little more. 

Narrowing his eyes, he focuses on making a precise incision straight down the middle of the brain𑁋the medial longitudinal fissure, he recalls𑁋his hand trembling slightly as he draws the scalpel down. The smell of formaldehyde grows stronger as he slices through the tissue, and the somewhat gelatinous texture that the brain has is incredibly off-putting. 

When he finally finishes, you help part the brain in half, and Jun’s eyes widen in awe at how visible the structures are. 

“You did pretty well.” You send an encouraging smile Jun’s way, taking the probe in your hand and motioning towards the exposed structures. “See? Look at that. You can see all the parts clearly.”

Jun takes a leap of faith and points to a particular part. “That’s… the thalamus there, right? And the hypothalamus is right below it.” 

You nod proudly. “You got it. And this section right here?”

“The… pons? And then, uh… Oh! The medulla oblongata. Then the spinal cord starts beneath it.”

“Yep. Here?”

“The cerebellum!” 

Your own heart seems to swell with every step up his confidence goes, whatever discomfort he was initially feeling begins to be melted away under the warmth of your praise. You bring your eyes up from the brain, letting it roam over his side profile, taking in the way the goggles make his hair stick out in odd angles, the curve of his jaw as he tilts his head slightly, brows furrowed in concentration.

As Jun pinpoints another structure on the brain, he faces toward you for confirmation, only to be met with your eyes already on him. He opens his mouth to say something, before slowly shutting it, and for a split second, he forgets about the question he was about to ask, the lab, everything else.

“Did I get it right?” Jun questions, feeling the confidence flowing through him falter under your thoughtful expression. “This is the sulcus? And the gyrus…”

You lower your attention back down to the sheep brain, realising he was pointing to a spot with the probe. 

“Hm, just…” You start, leaning in a bit closer to examine where he’s pointing to. With a sly smirk, you reach over to grasp his wrist lightly, slowly guiding his hand more accurately with the probe. Your warmth slips teasingly under his skin. “The sulcus is the little groove right here, and the gyrus is the ridge surrounding it. See it?”

Jun swears you’re doing this on purpose, and whatever it is, it’s working.

“Got it,” he mumbles, hoping you won’t be able to see the flush to his cheeks under the goggles. His eyes flicker between the brain and your face, noting the playful glint in your pupils that certainly isn’t from the fluorescent lighting of the lab room. “I see it now. Thanks.”

You let go of his wrist, still wearing that mischievous look at your lips, though it fades into something more genuine now. “You’re doing good, you know.”

Relief hits him from your words. He does feel way more comfortable, the entire lab becoming less daunting all because you were simply right here next to him. His mind momentarily flashes back to all what you’ve done for him𑁋from the tutoring, to the way you’ve been nothing but supportive and patient with him, before it all circles back to the mutual fondness blooming its way within the crevices of your hearts together.

He likes you, and you like him back. Jun still has no idea how this came to be, because he used to think he had no such chance with you. Yet now, he has the freedom to think about where he wants to take you on your first date.

The rest of the dissection goes by with ease. Slowly but surely, other students begin to clean up their workspace and submit their lab reports to Professor Lee, their tasks winding down as the lab session comes to a close. The lab starts to empty out as the minutes tick by, and it isn’t long until there’s just a few more students left𑁋you and Jun included.

“Here, I’ll finish up here,” You tell him, taking the brain into your hands without hesitation and placing it into a sealed bag for disposal later on. Then you take the dissection tools into your hands and walk off towards the sink to wash them, leaving Jun hanging in a bit of a daze. 

“I… What can I do then?” he asks, wanting to contribute still.

You turn back to him, humming in contemplation. 

“Let’s see… Disinfect the table, take off your gloves and goggles, and then…” Your lips quirk up again. “Just stand there and look cute. I’ll handle the rest.” 

The tips of his ears flush with heat as you casually sidle away from him and towards the sink. Jun shakes away the flutters in his stomach, though the corners of his lips tugs upwards as he works on cleaning up the table. 

Jun is already waiting by the door with his backpack on his shoulders as you finish up some tasks with Professor Lee. Once you get the signal that you’re free to leave, Jun feels the excitement pool down to his feet, a sense of accomplishment knowing that he was able to get through the one lab he dreaded most, and finished the class with a passing grade.

As you both exit the building, Jun pauses in his place, watching you continue to walk a bit without him.

“I owe you a date, you know,” he calls out to you with determination, though a pinch of nervousness still lingers.

You turn back to him curiously, and the way the sun catches on your face makes you appear more radiant above anything else. “A date, you say?” 

“Yeah, I…” He scratches the back of his neck sheepishly. “Before all of this, I told you I would owe you something for helping me, and well…” He lets his shoulder relax. “I want to take you on a date.” 

Jun watches the way a bunch of emotions seem to morph among your face. Even with knowing how you feel for him, he still braces himself for a different kind of response. 

Biting at the bottom of your lip, you step back up to him, and before he could fully process what’s happening, you answer him with a quick, affectionate kiss to his cheek. Right at the corner of his lips, to be specific. Then you reach down and grip his wrist, tugging him gently towards you.

“You’re on,” You challenge, a playful sparkle to your eyes. “Let’s get going.”

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@ahuiahoe

[ravens-two]

PAC: How will 2025 be like

This reading includes:

the general energy of 2025 for you

advice and an affirmation for the year ahead

The extended reading includes:

relationships in 2025

career in 2025

moodboard for 2025

Disclaimer: this is just for entertainment purposes, and as a pick-a-card reading it may not resonate for everyone.

Edit// because I somehow messed up and copied the wrong title for this pac 😭😭

TIPS | BOOK A READING WITH ME | PATREON | LINKTREE | SUGGEST A PAC TOPIC

Pile 1

Queen of Wands, Chariot, High Priestess

Tend (maintenance, encouragement, guidance), Unicorn, The Flame

"I drive fast, wind in my hair/ I push you to the limits 'cause I just don't care" - burning desire by lana del rey

Pile 1 your 2025 is certainly fiery. You're done being afraid, you're done always feeling like you can't actually achieve what you want, like you're not good enough. Those times are over, because you're entering 2025 with the intent of actually shaking things up. This year you're going after what you want and it doesn't even matter if you want multiple things because you're moving in multiple directions all at once. It seems like you've finally managed to find a way to keep yourself organized (be it keeping a journal or just using your time in better ways) and that's what allows you to go after so many different things. But, it's always important to remember not to sign up for too many things, pile 1. In the end you're only human and you can't do everything. Choose more intentionally.

With your song of the year being Burning Desire and with you having both the Queen of Wands and the High Priestess you're going to be irresistible this year, pile 1. I'm not sure if this is a glow up appearance wise - like you could be trying a new skincare routine that helps to clear your skin, you might lose or gain weight - or you might be changing up your style, dressing in a way that feels more authentic to who you are, or it could simply be your attitude, you carrying yourself with more confidence and sensuality. No matter what it is, you're definitely magnetic. Other people can't look away from you.

I also see you being filled with energy to dedicate yourself to many things and projects. This might not apply for everyone (at least in the same way) but I also see a lot of creative energy here. This year you might finally want to dedicate yourself to your artistic pursuits/hobbies whatever they may be (drawing, painting, dancing, writing, journaling, knitting, whatever it is). I also see you pursuing knowledge, if that makes sense, you want to try out new things and get more general knowledge - maybe you're reading the classics, watching documentaries, going to concerts.

Another thing that's really getting my attention about this year ahead for you is that you have no fear. Like, absolutely no fear at all. You're willingly to try anything once. I feel like in the past you've always held yourself back (if you have prominent Pluto or Saturn placements this might be even more relevant), and you're just sick and tired of it. You want to free yourself and so you're going into this year with the mentality of trying things, of being brave despite the anxiety and the fear. I'm really proud of you, pile 1.

Your rune for the year is Dagaz. Dagaz is the rune of sunrise and it represents new beginnings. This just continues the theme of empowering yourself and conquering your fears. Dagaz is very much a rune of hope. The night might have been long and dark, but the sun always rises and this year the sun is rising for you. New things, new situations, new people are coming into your life and by the end of the year you'll be a much different person than you were at the beginning of the year. I also see a lot of healing for you this year.

Your affirmation for 2025 is "I love and accept myself". Once again I feel like this ties super well to everything we've talked so far, especially the glowing up and confidence part. By loving and accepting yourself with all your flaws and shortcomings you're helping yourself to grow into a beautiful butterfly.

check out the extended reading on Patreon

Pile 2

Fool, Six of Swords, Six of Pentacles

Oak Tree (power, courage, strength), Bee, The Box

"Well, what we really need is a femininomenon" - femininomenon by chappell roan

Pile 2, you're in for a brand new beginning this year, it almost feels like a reinvention. A bit similar to pile 1, you're also tired of the things that were wearing you down last year (maybe even before that) and you're releasing yourself from them this year. You're letting go of the things that no longer serve you, which is commendable, because it takes so much strength. I see that for some of you this might be about walking away from a relationship(s), from a job or even from a place. With the Fool and the Six of Swords here you could very well be moving homes or even countries. Honestly, the energy for you pile 2 is as if you've always lived inside a box, following strict rules and being a "good girl" [gender neutral] but now you're absolutely done with that. You've decided that it's time to see what's outside the box. What does the world look like without the binds and the comfort of the box? Actually, now that I think about it this could also be very relevant for anyone that's moving out of their parents' house for the first time. It's an experience that's both exhilarating, freeing and terrifying.

No matter what, you're very decided to face things head on. You'll take care of the problems and unexpected complications as they come up. You know you're strong enough to solve these problems, to finally be free. You're going to be your very own femininomenon this year.

This is a huge year of growth for you pile 2, even more than pile 1. I really feel like a lot of people who pick this pile are young people becoming independent for the first time.

Your rune for the year is Tiwaz. Tiwaz is a rune of victory and sacrifice. It's almost saying that you know that things will be hard, you know you're going to have to work hard, sometimes you'll want to give up, but at the end of the day it's worth it because you come out victorious. Honestly, a part of this victory is recognizing how strong and capable you actually are.

Your affirmation for 2025 is "I am in harmony". So, what this tells me is that 2025 might be a bit chaotic for you with these many changes happening so you'll need to find moments of calm and harmony, find a safe ground to touch down when things seem like they might sweep you away. On the other hand, this also feels like you can finally breathe after you finally release yourself from all these problems and restrictions that were weighting down on you so heavily.

check out the extended reading on Patreon

Pile 3

Six of Wands, Ten of Swords, Nine of Swords

Broom (energy, clearing, freshening), Swan, The King

(an instrumental song) - verdes anos by carlos paredes

Pile 3, your energy is very interesting. You're the only pile that got an instrumental song for their song of the year which immediately gave me a vibe of peace and not letting the problems disturb you. By the way, if you've never heard this song I would definitely recommend it - it's by a Portuguese guitar player and the title means Green Years (as in still being green/young). You know, I think that this is a year of giving yourself grace and being gentle with yourself. Not everything will be perfect or go exactly as you dreamed it would, and that's perfectly fine, because in the end you will be okay. I do get this sense that you're already in this mentality and that's where the peace comes from. You have a belief that despite how wrong or how hard things are now it's just inevitable that everything will be fine.

The energy in your tarot cards is nothing if not interesting. There's a lot of anxiety and a sense of loss almost with the Ten and Nine of Swords, but on the other hand you also have victory and recognition with the Six of Wands. For some you this might be referring to some situation where you're taken advantage of, someone steals your work, or maybe it could even be about cheating or a betrayal for some of you. But! But, in the end this thing will work in your favor, maybe your boss notices that your coworker has been taking credit for your work, or maybe you finally recognize that a relationship or friendship wasn't as healthy as you wished it was.

2025 will be a year of clearing energies for you. As much as the Ten of Swords is a betrayal and deep pain, it can also be about the ending of a painful situation (even if that ending might be painful as well). I will also say that after this situation ends and the pain ends, some anxiety might set in because you're not used to being in a good place. You might constantly be looking over your shoulder trying to see where the next bad thing is coming from.

All in all, I think that this year you should focus on taking things slowly and patiently. Don't ever think that something is the end of the world, because there will be a solution for everything. As it is a year of clearing energies you might find yourself losing people or things, remember that no matter how unhealthy those situations might have been it's perfectly normal and healthy to grieve those losses.

Your rune for the year is Gebo. Gebo means gift and it's a rune that talks about exchanging gifts and favors with other people. The Norse people saw it as a way of creating stronger bonds with others, so this year you're being called to ask for help from loved ones. Believe me, this helps your relationships grow and get stronger.

Your affirmation for 2025 is "Everything I need comes to me at the perfect time." Once again you have this idea of solutions (no matter how unexpected) coming when you need them most. This might be a difficult year for you, pile 3, but believe that in the end you'll look back and see how much you've grown and much better your life has gotten.

check out the extended reading on Patreon

Pile 4

Tower, Eight of Swords, Wheel of Fortune

Sage (wisdom, purification, harmony), Golden Egg, The Nectar

"Are we brutal hearts that break the night in two?/'Cause I just want this night with you" - use me (brutal hearts) by diplo

Pile 4 you have a very interesting energy because I got a lot of information just from the photo that represents your pile alone. It seems that summertime will be either the most significant part of the year (like a turning point happening for example) or the happiest part of the year for you. In general, I see a shift in your life, it's like suddenly the world is slightly tilted instead of being straight just like the horizon line isn't straight in your photo.

But let's get into your tarot. The Tower definitely supports this idea of a turning point and a shift in your life. With the Eight of Swords here too, to me it almost feels like you think that things are going to happen in a specific way but then something very unexpected happens and now suddenly your life is completely different. The only "specific" example I'm getting is of someone thinking that they're going to start university studying a specific degree in a specific place, but suddenly the results come out and you didn't get in. Maybe you got in a different place or in a different degree that ends up changing the plans you had until now. No matter what it is in specific, the idea is that suddenly your life isn't going according to plan. For some of you this might either be a big relief or a big disappointment (it will, of course, depend on your circumstances). But more importantly, you should know that this will be for the better. There was something "rotten" in your trajectory and this is like course correction.

Aside from that, I also think that this will be a very important year of self-discovery and healing from past patterns for you. Unlike the figure in the eight of swords that's blindfolded and incapable of seeing, you'll be able to see yourself better. It's like you're more self-aware, both of your flaws and your strengths. Be careful though not to pay too much attention to all your faults and shortcomings because that isn't healthy either and it will definitely hurt you in the long run. As always, moderation is the answer.

No matter what this is a very important year for you because there are a lot of things happening for you - maybe a lot of firsts.

Your rune of the year is Laguz. Laguz is a lake and in general is a rune connected to water. To me this is very funny because the sea is very prominent on the photo for your pile. Laguz though is a card that talks about healing and deep reflection - two things we already touched upon so it confirms their importance this year. But I like this healing side of Laguz for you because it shows that you're recovering from the things and the ailments that have been bothering you (for some of you these might even be physical). Laguz has a rune of water also represents going with the flow, being very fluid and flexible - these are probably very important qualities that you'll be called to embody this year.

Your affirmation for 2025 is "I am willing to change". Pile 4 this is almost funny how in sync your whole reading is (at least up until now). This is confirmation again that there are a lot of changes coming for you this year, but it's also a reminder to remain flexible. Don't get too attached to any outcome, things will work out as they should and you will be fine.

check out the extended reading on Patreon

[jjenthusee]

Moonlight And Intentional Mistakes

Pairing: Jason Todd x Reader

A/N: This is inspired and dedicated to @heavysighing-dreamyeyes amazing post linked here (show it some love) and their numerous sweet words especially on my Broken Mug writing drabble (also linked), so after crying reading their messages, i had to do something about the intense rush to write and the best way i can think of thanking you is by doing what i know, art and writing. i had no idea that i was influencing anyone, i only hoped my love for Jason was communicated correctly. i hope every single one of you that comes across my account has beautiful things happen to u. i’ll give u all a million kisses. please continue to write, i would love to continue reading what u have for us next <3 there’s also a surprise at the end :D (as always comments are appreciated if you’re comfortable <3 let me know your brain rot thoughts) ENJOY

Tags: teeth rotting fluff, soft Jason, touch starved Jason lowkey, siri play Never Grow Up by Niall Horan 😔, might have inspired the direction of the fic

Word Count: 3.4k

The moon was high.

Moonlight had casted a faint glow on the window blinds, it peaked in through the tiny gaps.

Only a small lamp was on, cascading light from the living room into your room. It gave enough light to see the outlines of your room. Bathing everything it could touch in a faint warm glow.

It was still dark enough that the details were too fuzzy to point out, but most objects were wrapped in shadows, bringing a unique calm to your room.

In the chill of night, the bed was warm. Jason was the perfect heater. The blankets were cozy and the sound of a fan whirred at the corner of the room.

It didn’t make sense covering yourself head to toe in a fuzzy blanket with a fan blasting air at you, but the sound mellowed you into the night, calling slumber closer to you.

It would have been easy to sleep if you were given the chance, but your gentle giant boyfriend was adamant to prove to you that he needed to sleep as physically close as possible to you.

It would have been fine, but today you couldn’t find a relaxing sleeping position. You had to shift your body around before finding the state of mind and the right amount of comfort to drift off, but tonight was difficult. Not only were you constantly shifting in the bed sheets, you were keeping Jason awake.

As your body moved to a new spot on the bed, Jason followed. Turning his body to follow the heat you left behind on the sheets. He wasn’t fond of the fact that a blanket fully engulfed you while he didn’t, it wasn’t fair.

When he got close enough to throw his muscular arm over you, you beat him to your next journey across the mattress.

If the queen bed the both of you were laying on looked like a college dorm twin XL with Jason laid out over it, then you shouldn’t have cornered yourself onto the edge.

Now half of your body dangled off the mattress. The bed was definitely big enough for the both of you the last time you checked, but with Jason getting closer to you every time you moved, it looked like he teleported a smidge closer when you blinked.

It also wasn’t ideal when he rolled onto the corner of the blanket that had unraveled from your legs.

You teetered on the end of the bed when he purposefully made sure to take up ninety percent of what was left of the mattress. Locking you on the edge, wrapped in a blanket.

You had been laying on your side, but Jason kept nudging you, tickling your face with his messy hair when he got close enough to attempt to burrow his large self into you. You kept scooting back, but once you didn’t feel anymore mattress, your legs were feeling where the cold air invaded the bed.

Now you settled on the dangerous edge with one leg completely off. Despite your avoidance of Jason, your free leg locked around Jason’s leg for any support to keep you safely on the bed. Your entire upper half was swaddled like a baby as the blanket blocked out any of the chill, your arms completely smushed against your sides with no way to free yourself besides Jason moving his body off of the edges of your blanket.

You had no control whatsoever.

It was you and your straining leg on Jason that was the only thing keeping you from plopping on the cold floor. Now in a vulnerable position, did Jason have the bright idea of asking the question you’ve been avoiding all day.

Where were his pudding cups?

———

“I take it back!” You pleaded with Jason as he kept the blanket tightly wound around you, preventing you from moving your arms to retaliate.

“I’m sorry, what did you say?” Jason playfully faced at you, laying on his side. His voice melted with innocence, but had underlying amusement.

Your blanket was your savior and your enemy as it saved you from the hard floor, but it was also securely caught by Jason’s entire weight. He had you completely trapped inside with only your head and legs poking out, the fabric slung around you.

Moving his body an inch closer to the edge, Jason pushed your body further off, further with no support beside his mere weight and strength keeping you from falling.

“I swear there were two pudding cups before you left!” You screamed, your hair falling off your face, the ends gravitating toward the ground, your impending doom.

“Sweetheart, let’s play world’s greatest detective and I’ll ask you something. If I didn’t eat ‘em and we are the only two people who live in this apartment, then who do we have left? Hm?” Jason’s voice, honey sweet, as he emphasized the contradictions in your statement.

With the blanket bunched in his hands, Jason easily lowered you slightly, juggling your weight effortlessly while laying on his side. You cursed at his perfect athleticism.

The room may have been dark, but you didn’t need the moonlight to know he had a shit eating grin trying to get you to confess.

You felt like this was probably the closest you would feel to people walking the plank in those pirate movies you watched as a kid, a sick waiting game not knowing when your fate was inevitable. It was fun at the time and maybe the cold ocean was different from your bedroom floor, but otherwise it was still cold.

“I don’t even like sweets!” You playfully laughed as he teasingly let his hands slip, clearly seeing through your lie. You squealed as you felt your head dip and your leg fall from on top of Jason’s.

“And my hand slipped.” Jason equally lied through his teeth, his threat filled with no malice whatsoever as he securely held onto you.

“I’m starting to feel like this has nothing to do with pudding cups.” You raised your head back up to look at Jason, a full smile present on your face, testing your vulnerable state.

“Oh?” Jason raised his eyebrow as he looked down at you from the edge of the bed. The angle looked great on him.

“My world’s greatest detective intuition is telling me that you’re just mad that I kept rolling away from you.” You mischievously pointed out.

“My love, you need to use those skills to find out why all our pudding is gone.”

“Do you do this to all the criminals you interrogate?” You deflected, using your eyes to point to the current position both of you were in, dangling from the bed in a blanket while Jason kept you there.

“Only the pretty ones.” Jason sung, pulling you up slightly so you weren’t as close to the floor, not quite on the bed, but in a better spot than before.

“I didn’t realize the Red Hood had such malicious threatening techniques.” You shook your head feigning disappointment as you struggled to readjust your leg to latch onto his again. It probably looked awkward, but you were desperate. It wasn’t your fault that your boyfriend was built like a tank. “I promise to not rob anymore banks anytime soon. I’ll straighten myself out. Scouts honor.” You breathed out, exhausted from the movement.

“Just admit you ate the pudding and I’ll erase everything. Your speeding tickets and the bounty on you in 15 countries.”

“It’s 18 actually, don’t defile me—“

Jason effortlessly lowered you again. The blanket slipping slightly from jostling you around.

“Okay, okay!” You cried out. “If I fall you’re limited to two kisses a day!”

“This isn’t a negotiation.”

“Three, take it or leave it.”

“Tell me where the pudding is.”

“Four kisses and you can cuddle suffocate me when we sleep.” The blanket around you felt noticeably loose.

Jason scoffed, offended by your choice of phrasing.

“If our lives are ever on the line, I gotta remember I can’t ever let you negotiate.” He tauntingly called above you. “And I don’t cuddle suffocate you.”

“So it was ‘cause I moved away from you earlier!” You cried out as you slipped further. The blanket loosening completely around you, your gasp blurring into Jason’s name. A plea to catch you.

Jason quickly bent down, rolling his body off the bed and slipping his arms around you as he followed you to the floor. He rolled his body forward enough to quickly shift your position so his body plopped on the ground first while you landed on top of him.

It was a soft landing as you laid on his chest. Quickly finding a comfortable position in his arms.

“You only get one kiss a day.” You flatly said. “Why is our bed frame weirdly tall?” You nuzzled your head into his chest.

“Our deal was two.” Jason tenderly caressed your head. Moving your hair in motions that made you want to fall asleep.

“Looks like we’re both liars.” You barely whispered, sleepiness taunting your body.

“I guess you’re still wanted in 18 countries.”

You lazily laughed into Jason, his body slightly shaking from your movement. His arms wrapping around you, engulfing the feel of your laughter and locking it between your bodies. He smiled into your shoulder. Smelling your comfort.

You lifted your head, freeing your face. You were still being held by Jason, but you had a clearer view of his loving gaze lost on you as he traced your features, entranced by your smile.

“Missed opportunity.” You drunkenly watched and felt Jason’s fingers caressing your face.

“If you let me ‘cuddle suffocate’ you, you might have another shot.” Jason’s thumb rubbed your cheek, pressing into the softness. His calloused finger pads feeling slightly itchy, but you would never pull away, too endeared by how gently he treats you.

“Worth it.” You say after snapping out of your trance that was locked on your boyfriend. He knew the right areas to get your mind lost on his touch, focused solely on him.

You pulled yourself up from laying on top of Jason, grabbing for his hands as you stood. Straining to help pull him up, but almost all the effort came from his own strength, not yours.

Playfully, Jason never let go of your hands and let his body be dragged completely onto you, dramatically coming forward to rewrap himself around you.

You giggled as you threw your arms around him. Enjoying the warmth that radiated from him, reheating the once empty space. Your own personal heater. You were glad tonight was one of the nights he stayed home with you, cuddled in bed all evening. You tried your best to soothe his mind, away from the thoughts of patrol as much as you could.

Giving his mind a small mental break, to hold you close and whatever else he needed. Both of you continue to work hard to develop and maintain the kind of trust that Jason needed to work through the hard days, silent but never alone.

With reassuring hugs while he counted your breaths, holding onto your hand just to thoughtlessly memorize them, standing in your presence just to observe you.

His difficulty with readjusting to the mundane and useless tasks of every day life was the biggest challenge. Too many conversations about why we need to treat ourselves because we want to. Jason’s mind was filled with too many needs.

He needed a reason to buy himself something, he needed to push his body to the limits because there was no other option, he needed to work alone.

So you showed him that he didn’t need you to hold his arm while you walked around the city, but he wanted you to do it.

He didn’t need you to take care of him, but you wanted to because you cared.

As you lost yourself in the shared closeness, you swayed your body. Jason unconsciously following your movements, swaying with you and letting his hands intertwine behind you, letting it gently rest against your lower back. Once you held on, Jason had silently vowed to never be the first to let go.

As you moved your bodies, clueless about Jason’s promise to himself, you didn’t let go either. So the two of you clung to one another.

It was one of the millions of things you cherished about Jason, he showed his devotion through his mannerisms. He helped put away your bags after a tired day of work, when he brought you a blanket if you fell asleep on the couch then carried you to bed. He bought your favorite snacks if he was at the store. He effortlessly followed you, content to be next to you.

Of course, he still put up limitations. He wouldn’t put your safety at risk. He sat closer and became more aware of restaurant doors, he kept you walking on his side or always in front of him, when he slept he made sure to determine the layout that suited you best, away from the window. His eagerness to make sure your wellbeing is priority.

It led to him not sleeping once you switched your position too many times tonight. He wasn’t satisfied with you being closer to the window, but he also was determined to get you to cuddle.

Numerous times you wanted to tease him, but after a Red Hood reveal that had you debating if he collaborated with his brothers to pull a twisted prank on you and an emotional talk, you couldn’t blame him for any of it. The fitted suit was just an added bonus you could outrightly ogle at.

You two were standing, holding each other in the dark. His head nuzzled on the base of your neck, his hands gripping your shirt, crinkling at the desperation. Sometimes Jason felt overstimulated when his feelings were ready to burst. His unfamiliarity with so much tender affection makes his mind unable to process all of it.

All you can do is to tell him that your there. Reminding him that you were unwilling to go anywhere.

“I’m here, Jay.” You softly reassured. “I’m right here, in your arms.”

Jason was unaware of the same silent promise you prayed to yourself, to never let him go.

When Jason’s grip loosened, your lips softly kissed the side of his head, soothing the thing that gives him a hard time. Repeating the motion, feeling his breaths even.

You never said that you were limited to how many kisses you can give him.

As you methodically swayed and with one final kiss against his hot skin, Jason shifted himself to standing taller, resting his forehead on yours. His hair laid flat against your skin.

You closed your eyes, enjoying how docile he became once you initiated physical touch. A craving he wanted and you unconditionally gave him.

When you opened your eyes, adjusting to the darkness, you grabbed one of his hands to intertwine them, your other hand gently falling onto his shoulder. He noticed the familiar stance, mimicking that of a dance. He silently rested his free hand on your waist, once again feeling the fabric of his shirt that you wore.

There was no music, but you leaned into Jason once again, swaying to the rhythm of his heartbeat, slow and in tune with his breaths. The further closeness let you settle your head underneath his chin, his hand following around the width of your waist pulling you in more.

Everything felt perfect. It was the middle of the night in the dark, you wore pajamas, no music played, both of your hair messy, but you held Jason. A sweet grasp of his shirt bunched in your hand, your feet bumping into his, the smell of your soap radiating from his skin from his shower.

If this was your last day on Earth, you would think you were blessed to be in front of the most loving, tender man. Watching his eyes softened and sparkle as he feels a breath of peace.

That was all you needed.

In an act of surprise, you moved your arm to wrap around Jason’s waist and attempted to dramatically swoop him back. It was haphazardly done, but he gladly played along despite the difference in height making it a little awkward. He dipped back then came forward, reuniting your embrace, both of you laughing at your clumsy attempt at a slow dance.

“Why does this feel like an awkward school dance?” You breathed out, breathless from the laughing, talking into his clean shirt. Most likely you were taking it to wear tomorrow night.

“We’re just swaying, we aren’t really moving how we’re supposed to.” Jason rubbed your back as you caught your breath, his voice softly surrounding you as you rested on his chest, feeling every word.

“And how would you know?” You looked up at him, a teasing tone. “It’s not like either of us know how to slow dance.”

Jason paused, looking down at your eyes, contemplating.

“Would you like to learn?” He hesitated, combing his hand through your hair.

You completely stopped swaying, Jason’s hand dropping from the top of your head to rest on your cheek. He carefully watched your reaction, your eyes widening, a stunned look in your eyes.

His grip tightened, barely noticeable if you didn’t feel his thumb press on your waist, helping to remind you to respond.

“I mean, I’ve always wanted to try it.” You looked down toward your feet, slightly feeling the embarrassment creep up at your confession, but Jason rubbed his thumb on your cheek. A silent comfort. “But, I don’t have a reason to learn. I’m way past school dance age, I rarely go to events where it might happen, and…no one has ever asked me.”

A silence settled between the both of you, Jason’s thumb pausing. He looked between your eyes, glancing back and forth.

“Can I get my phone?” He asked with no explanation, no other detail leading to your earlier confession.

You felt the mortification creeping at you. You nodded, letting go of Jason.

He stood there until you removed yourself first. His grip fleeting, walking in the dark to grab his phone, illuminating the room with its screen where he stood. You curiously watched him, not quite understanding his intentions.

“I might be a little rusty.” He voiced, a broad back facing you.

A gentle melody played from his phone. Quiet, but getting louder as he pressed the volume button on the side of his phone.

“What?” You stood there awkwardly.

Jason turned to face you, throwing his phone on the night stand as he walked back over, raising an open hand to you.

“May I have this dance?”

He stunned you again, your brain having too many delays at once.

Your hand trembled as you raised it to meet his. You couldn’t respond to his question because your throat ached, ached in a way that you wished the world ended right there, to consume the pounding heartbeat in your ears, the firm grip of Jason, and attempt to swallow up all the love swelling in your heart. It would put up one hell of a fight.

Once the both of you met, bodies close, Jason repositioned your hands as it was before. Gently guiding you through the steps as you nervously looked at your feet, your tense body adding to your struggle.

Once you felt a decent rhythm and Jason patiently assisted you, memorizing your expressions, movements and the smile you beamed when you finally felt comfortable.

He grabbed your chin. Guiding your head back up to look at him. Bringing his head closer to yours.

Your eyes closed halfway before he gripped your back, dipping you back, holding your weight as you inhaled in surprise.

“Jason!” You laughed his name as he swung you back up, extravagantly twirling you from him, clasping your hand to twirl you back into his embrace.

“Rusty, huh?” You quipped, eyeing him, trying to stabilize your steps.

“What can I say, Alfred beat the movements into me. He would feel a shift in the air if I got it wrong.” Jason smiled, picking up the swaying again, enthusiastically moving both your bodies.

You continued dancing through laughter, not watching your feet as much as you were, letting the feeling of the music guide you.

Not knowing where your body and his separated, a beautiful blur.

How could you have missed out on something so sweet?

A dance shared between two individuals who adore one another.

Jason stamped another mark onto your life.

First dances laced with intertwined hands, lips brushing against one another, tuning out everything but each other’s voices.

Maybe the world did end, but you wouldn’t have known, too immersed in the moonlight on Jason’s skin, the warmth of love and home enveloping you.

[uzumaki-rebellion]

Lick Back 2 (Part 1) by Uzumaki Rebellion

Pairing: Terry Richmond x Black Female OC

Warning(s): 18+, Explicit Sex, Angst, Domestic Drama, Unprotected Sex, Breeding Kink, Violence, AITA!Terry Richmond.

Summary: Terry Richmond didn't expect to become a father over night. A surprising photo in the mail reveals that an illicit affair he had with a married woman eleven months ago resulted in a baby girl named after him. Ecstatic to be a new dad, he races to South Carolina to reunite with Nova, and bring their new family to Louisiana for Christmas. Unfortunately, Nova's estranged husband Jordan has different plans.

Word count: 18.6K

Read Lick Back (The Beginning) HERE.

"Like sweet morning dew

I took one look at you

And it was plain to see

You were my destiny

With you I'll spend my time

I'll dedicate my life

I'll sacrifice for you

Dedicate my life for you"

Method Man & Mary J. Blige—"All I Need"

Terry Richmond couldn't stop looking at the eight by eleven color photo he recieved in the mail.

Terrina Richmond.

He had a daughter. A two-month-old baby girl.

His mind raced with so many chaotic thoughts. He'd had an affair with a married woman and she left him to salvage her wreck of a marriage in South Carolina. Terry spent months trying to forget her, poured himself into his work, and blotted out the memory of Nova Patterson.

The last time they made love, he nearly broke the bed, pulling out his best erotic moves to keep her. By his calculations, that was when he impregnated her. They loved each other, but ultimately, he had to let her go. She belonged to someone else and already had an infant son. Who was he to prevent a reconciliation of a family?

He worked day and night, taking on extra hours, even requested deployment overseas to get away from Nova haunting him with her beauty, kindness, and intelligence. He wished the world for her, but couldn't bear to be in the states knowing he couldn't have her.

The big bosses denied his request. They wanted his skills building up their elite soldiers in Oceanside. Make more war machines. Oorah.

Terry booked a flight to Charleston the moment he hung up the phone with Nova. An hour later he still sat on his couch wondering who to confess his shocking news to. His first inclination was to reach out to his family, but he wasn't ready to explain the circumstances of fathering a child with a married woman to his parents just yet. His closest friends Von and Bethany were next in line, but he could already hear Bethany chewing him out for being no different than Jordan, with Von nodding his head in agreement. Telling his homegirl Angie would only result in a flying fist socking him in the jaw.

He had accrued ninety days of leave time that he planned on using up for Nova and Terrina. His godson Junior, too. He stroked his chin. Junior would become his stepson now. A bonus child. Nova gave him purpose. He had a family to care for.

Terry cancelled his flight.

Nova would have a ton of things to bring back with the children. He would drive there instead of flying and rent a U-Haul cargo trailer in Charleston. Nova could take what she wanted and he would buy anything else she needed once they returned to Oceanside. He glanced around his condo. They could stay in his place until the lease ended the following summer and then look for a new home big enough for the four of them.

Four.

How strange. He woke up that morning a single man living a solitary life. Now he was responsible for three other people. He wanted to marry Nova as soon as possible, that way he could get them on his health insurance. Terry grinned. He moved like a man with a plan.

Packing more clothes for an extended trip, the reality sank in further. He was a father. He stopped to look at his daughter again. She had his ears. Funny how he hadn't noticed it before. Terrina's eyes struck him first, but then all the other little details jumped out. She was his mama's color. Terry got his eyes from his maternal grandmamma and his ears from his paternal grandpa. Terrina repped both sides of his family like him. He sat down on his bed and rocked his body, staring at her picture like it was going to disappear if he stopped looking at her.

That was his baby girl.

Nova carried her while enduring the stress of an unraveling marriage. His woman needed peace and a home fit for a queen. He was determined to give it to her. Texting his parents, he sent them a quick message that he had to postpone coming to Louisiana because of work.

He stopped by his local coffee shop and loaded up on an egg white breakfast sandwich and coffee. Hitting the road by noon, he headed east after texting Nova that he was driving and would arrive in Charleston within two days. She sent him another picture of Terrina and Junior. He smiled so hard in his truck after taking a restroom break. Junior was nearly two years old, and it shocked Terry that he didn't look like Jordan anymore. The boy had Nova's face dipped in milk chocolate. He noticed that she'd typed the names Terrina and Novan. He typed the name Novan with a question mark. A minute later, she sent a message that she legally changed her son's name to hers. His nickname was Van-Van. Yeah, she was really done with Jordan if she yanked his son's name away from him. That shit was tough.

"My baby girl will never have that problem," he muttered, heading onto the freeway again.

Terry drove non-stop, only taking breaks when the truck needed gas. He loaded up with a bunch of Big Macs from McDonald's in Dallas, and his heart started beating wildly. Sitting in the parking lot, he inhaled deeply several times and listened to one of his meditation apps. On the verge of a panic attack unless he spoke to someone about his sudden anxiety at meeting his daughter, he called Bethany and confessed everything.

"I'm sitting here freaking out, Bethany. I just want to get to South Carolina and see Nova…hold my baby, but right now I'm losing it. Cuss me out, yell at me, I don't care…I just needed to talk to someone I trusted who knows me…knows I wouldn't do anything to hurt anyone on purpose. Not even Jordan."

Bethany gave a long sigh. He waited for a shrill tone to rip his ear apart.

"Terry, I have to be honest with you. Nova called and told me everything a month ago."

"She what? A month ago?"

"Don't be upset. She was scared and didn't have anyone supporting her. Her family flipped out…Jordan's family flipped. Jordan is on a downward spiral. It's a shitshow out there…but I promised her I wouldn't say anything until she was ready to face you. Go easy on her, okay?"

"I'm glad she has you," he finally said after a long pause.

"You should be glad to have me, too. I should kick your butt, though."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you anything about her…and me."

"Didn't have to. I already knew something was up. I just hoped you two would've ended it quietly without all this blowback. You make a pretty baby, though. She looks just like you and your mom."

"I'm nervous Bethany…a little scared. I'm thrilled to have Terrina…it's just…I'm halfway across the country ready to uproot Nova from her hometown. Am I doing the right thing for her and the baby? I mean…she has Junior…Van-Van. Can I take him away from his father like this?"

"She reached out and wants you to come for her. That's all you need to concern yourself with. I'll let her tell you herself what's been going on, but that is your family now. Jordan should be an afterthought in your mind."

"I want to marry her."

"Get her out of Charleston first. Text me when you get there."

"Does Von know?"

"No. This is something he needs to hear from you when you get back."

"Thank you for being there…for the both of us."

"You have a darling little two-month-old who needs her daddy. Drive safe, Terry. Love you."

Terry sat in the truck, feeling better. Bethany didn't hate him. He texted Nova despite the late hour in her time-zone.

He started the truck and drove closer to his love.

Terry sat in a parking lot of a Target store in a town just outside of Charleston on Sunday morning. He wanted to buy gifts for Nova and the baby, but the store didn't open until seven. The weather was already hot, and he rolled the windows down to wait three hours. He contemplated waiting at a Jack in the Box parking lot, but there were two cop cars there and the last thing he wanted was to attract the attention of the police outside of a fast-food joint at four in the morning.

He spent time on his smartphone looking up all the things he had to do legally to establish paternity. DNA test. Filing the results with the court. It would probably be a hassle to take Jordan's name off the birth certificate, but Terry would spend whatever money it took to pay all court fees to do so. He'd need to get a lawyer in Charleston to navigate everything.

The store opened, and he grabbed a cart, rolling it to the children's section. There was no sales associate around to ask about sizes, so he looked at infant clothing that claimed to fit newborns up to two months. He bought a fancy box of chocolate for Nova's grandmother who she stayed with after leaving her brother's home. Flowers for Nova. Baby balloons. A clunky-looking Captain America action figure for Van-Van. It took him a minute to find the Black one. Sam Wilson. It was going to be all Black everything in their household. Terry paused in the toy section. He imagined his life being like Von and Bethany's, raising two children and being happy. Von always went home to a happy wife and happy children. Sending up a prayer to God, he wanted to provide the same life for Nova and his new family.

He paid for everything at check-out and rolled his cart out to the truck. Bethany was right about Target. You can't ever go inside and come out with the one thing you went in for. He spent over two hundred dollars on all kinds of toys for his daughter and bonus son.

Terry smelled like long hours on the road and stopped at a café to purchase a blueberry muffin that gave him access to the restroom. He washed up, brushed his teeth, and changed into fresh clothes he carried in a backpack. By the time he hit the road again, he was ready to face his future. Following the directions on his GPS, he admired the old buildings and the slow pace of Charleston's southern charm. That went out the window when a palmetto bug flew into the truck. A goddamn flying roach. Hell nah!

He rolled up his windows and put on the air conditioner. The directions showed that he still had an hour to reach Edisto Island. He leaned into the steering wheel once he started crossing the McKinley-Washington Bridge that led to Nova. The Dawhoo River below him looked like mysterious black water. The tannins seeping out of decaying trees turned the water a dark tea-color. Nova once explained that the word "Edisto" meant "black" and was also the name of the indigenous people who lived there, including her Gullah kin, from way back.

His heart palpitated, and he started breathing faster when he reached the street where Mrs. Mariam Walker, the matriarch of Nova's family lived. He smelled the heavy scent of the sea and the river. The house was only a few blocks away from Edisto Beach. Everything around him had been built by Gullah hands. Homes. The bridge. Docks. Churches. Everything.

He passed Mrs. Walker's house because there was no parking available on both sides of the street. Making a U-Turn, he found a spot where a driver left in a brown van. He glanced over at the large white house with the double stairs leading to another stairway that led up to a semi-wrap-around porch. Several older Black men and a couple of men Terry's age stood on the porch looking his way. They built the old house high to avoid flooding, and it seemed like it should've been on a heritage museum tour. He typed into his phone.

I'M HERE.

He put on a stoic expression to face Nova's male relatives. They probably weren't thrilled to see him approaching the house.

The front door flew open and Nova dashed out. She ran down the top stairs first and waited on the landing, her eyes searching the street. When she fixed her gaze on him, she covered her mouth and jumped up twice before running down the left set of stairs, hurtling forward like a comet to greet him. He moved so fast people could've sworn he had wings on his feet like Mercury.

"Terry!" she cried out.

A bunch of women exited the house to watch them.

The moment Nova reached him, he lifted her up high. She hugged his neck so tight that she almost cut off his circulation. He set her down, and they held each other. Embracing her was like having a missing puzzle piece slipped back into its proper place. It was hard to look at her without the tears in his eyes making it difficult to see. She trembled in his arms and every hitched breath she took tore at his heart. He had been a fool to let her go. Sparing another man's feelings in a wasted act of nobility cost him time with the woman he loved and a daughter he hadn't met yet. Lying to Jordan about not sleeping with Nova had been the wrong choice to make eleven months ago. He should've come clean and faced the music back then. It cost him his own happiness. Cost him sharing the journey of Terrina's birth.

He touched and smelled Nova's fragrant hair. She still carried the scent of sugar cookies and strawberries on her skin. Her cornflower blue wrap dress sat snug around her figure. Having babies just made her look enchanting to him.

"Told you…told you I would come the moment you needed me," he said.

She nodded, and they pressed their foreheads together.

"I love you," he said.

"I love you, too."

She burst into tears. He rocked her in his arms, saying her name over and over.

"Are the babies inside?" he asked.

"Van-Van is with Jordan for the weekend. Terrina is inside with my mother and grandmother."

Nova wiped her wet face and puffy eyes.

"Ready to meet your daughter?"

He laughed out loud, and then bit down on his tongue gently to keep himself from leaking more water out of his eyes. He wiped his face and glanced at the welcoming committee on the porch.

"Mawmaw cooked a big Sunday breakfast and invited the family over to see you," she said.

"See me, or beat my ass?" he joked.

Nova's eyes welled up. He stroked her arms.

"Baby, I'm sorry. Bethany told me you're having it rough here. I gotta take that weight off of you. I'm the one who got you pregnant…I'm the one who'll fix all of this, too."

He kissed her forehead. She kept her cute pixie cut and fixed her baby hairs to look like curling ocean waves. He rubbed her back. She rested her head on his chest, unable to look at him.

"Terry…I didn't know she was yours. Jordan and I got back together, and I tried to put you away in my heart. He started messing up out here…I left him…but I still thought she was his. I wasn't hiding her from you…I wasn't trying to keep her a secret from Jordan, either. I didn't realize until after she was born that she wasn't his. I was so frightened of what would happen to me and her when everyone found out what I did. People in my family called me a whore…and Jordan…"

She wept. He soothed her as best as he could.

"Just think about us…okay? Hold on to us and I promise, Nova…things are going to get better."

"Okay."

She wiped her nose and inhaled deeply to calm herself down. He clasped her hand in his, and she walked him up the steps. Her family members held paper plates of food and hushed their talking as Terry looked at them.

"Everyone, this is Terry…Terry Richmond. Terrina's father."

"We can see dat. Can't miss his chirren at all."

The other relatives tittered under their breath. An older woman in her eighties pushed a walker and Nova's family parted to give her room so her eyes could inspect Terry up and down. She had slightly wrinkled, dark pecan-brown skin and gray hair clipped short. Mariam Walker…Mawmaw.

"I see una have no shame coming here after putting a baby in her the wrong way."

"Mawmaw," Nova whispered.

"Ma'am, I'm not here to upset you. I want to meet my daughter and be with Nova."

"Be with Nova?"

Mawmaw sucked her teeth and pointed at Nova with an accusatory finger.

"Look ya. Dat is a married 'ooman. You a comeya, messing up the peace of dis family."

"Ma'am, I don't mean any disrespect—"

"Tie yuh mout!" Mawmaw shrieked.

A female relative stepped forward.

"Okay now, Mawmaw…my Lord, let the man get inside the house first before y'all put all they business in the street. Hi Terry, I'm Cornelia…Nova's aunt. People call me Nella. Come inside. Mawmaw is going to fuss no matter what you say."

Nella walked toward the screen and opened it for Terry. She was forty-ish, heavyset, and a shade darker than Nova, but had the same sparkling brown eyes.

"I have some things in the truck to bring in," Terry said.

"Go get 'em, then," Nella said with a warm smile.

Terry walked back down to the truck with Nova. He collected the flowers and gave them to her. Her face brightened up with the full, colorful bouquet in her hands. He grabbed the balloons, Terrina's bag of baby clothes, and chocolate, then headed back to the house with Nova by his side.

"This is for you, ma'am…Mawmaw," he said.

Mawmaw looked at the big box of expensive Godiva chocolate shells, and her eyes widened; surprised that he was giving her something.

"He tryna butter her up," one of the older men snickered.

Nella waved for him to keep moving.

"Tote all that in here, Terry, c'mon now. Can't let these no-see-ums in the house."

Terry glanced at Nova.

"Mosquitos. The ones here will eat you up and you won't even see them," Nova said.

He grinned hard enough to show his gums.

"They've been eating me up since I got here."

Nova led him inside the quaint living room filled with old, cared-for furniture and several sizes of intricately woven tan baskets with dark brown geometric patterns woven in the detail that decorated the corners. The interior smelled of good southern cooking and something else, something that the west coast didn't quite have yet: the odor of history. His hometown in Louisiana had it. All the south and the east coast had it in abundance. Compared to the south, the west was still young and feeling its oats.

Old family pictures cluttered a mantle, and so many people were crammed inside that it made Terry feel like the Jolly Green Giant. He definitely was the tallest person there. His eyes were drawn to a large painting above the mantle of elongated ebony figures showcasing men, women, and children dressed in clothing from the 1930s with blue-black skin and featureless faces. The painting seemed to be the focal point of the room that gave it a cozy feel rooted in a proud lineage.

Three women Mawmaw's age sat on a couch wearing their good Sunday wigs. They scrutinized everything on him. Somewhere out back, the excited voices of children playing added a comforting noise.

Nova took the bag of clothes from him and set them on an empty chair.

"Hello…I'm Terry, pleased to see everyone," he said.

Mawmaw shuffled in with her walker and Nella helped her sit down on an old rocking chair.

"Dis him," Mawmaw said to the ladies on the couch.

Nova introduced him to everyone present. He became eager to make a good impression despite the hard stares and thin-lipped expressions from the elders. All he needed was a knife to cut the simmering animosity in the front room. A giant bible sat propped open on a bookstand next to Mawmaw's rocker. A huge brown lacquered cross hung next to a picture of a tawny Jesus on the wall behind her seat. Terry took in the context clues and understood quickly that he was in a serious religious household. That meant their situation would never be acceptable to MawMaw. The matriarch's frigid brown eyes stared him down like she was going to turn him into a pillar of salt.

A baby's cry interrupted the family showdown.

Mawmaw's eyes immediately softened, and she tried to stand up too fast, almost losing her balance.

"My great-grandbaby is calling for me," Mawmaw said, or at least that's what Terry made out.

The shrill cry shattered the peace again, and Terry felt a lump grow in his throat. He imprinted that sound to memory. That was his daughter. His first time hearing her.

Nella gently pushed Mawmaw back in her seat.

"Bring ha," Mawmaw said.

"Mawmaw…Terry needs to see his baby. He come three thousand miles. Man is probably tired and hungry rushing here. Let him have his time alone with Terrina," Nella said.

Nova placed her flowers on an end table near one of the older adult men sitting in the room and grabbed Terry's hand.

"Come…she's back here," Nova said.

Her eyes were shiny with pride and love.

They moved past family members who ogled his height and muscular build. His body looked big and battle ready from all of his military training. Moving through a short hallway, they skipped past two other bedrooms and made their way to the last one.

Pauletta, Nova's mother, sat on a worn pistachio green armchair.

"Nova, she's not wet or anything. She might be ready to eat again—"

She fell silent, spotting Terry standing behind Nova. He sensed a wariness in her eyes, but she only pressed her lips together. Terry looked down at Pauletta's lap. Air rushed out of his chest instantly.

Terrina.

So tiny. So chubby. So adorable. So his twin.

He let out a shaky breath. Pauletta noticed the tears in his eyes. Her demeanor changed immediately. Nova lifted their daughter up and brought her closer to him. Terrina's cheeks held a few dewdrop tears that looked like tiny crystal jewels to him.

"Hey Terrina…meet your daddy," Nova said.

"Sit down," Pauletta said, leaving the armchair available to him. She left him alone with Nova and the baby.

Terry sat down with a heavy body, and Nova placed his daughter in his arms. Terrina squirmed and made little mewling sounds. Her eyes tried to focus on the enormous face staring down at her. She scrunched her cheeks and eyes up then let out a few "Neh…neh…neh" cries, threatening to bawl loud and long. With tiny clenched fists waving about, her cheeks soon turned a ruddy brown complexion, filled with distressed baby emotion.

"Heh…heh…heh…neh," she said.

She lined her green eyes with his, and Terry said her name for the first time to her face.

"Hello Terrina, daddy's here. I made it. Baby girl…I'm here," he said.

The deepness of his voice quieted Terrina's discomfort. She latched onto his face with teary eyes and studied him like she had to take a test the next day. He touched her thin blue t-shirt with little white ducks on them and looked over the matching bottoms that covered her diaper. Her hands relaxed, and he touched each finger, admired every little toe. He stroked her ears that stuck out like his, and he sniffed her dark brown curls that looked so full all over her scalp. She had Nova's heart-shaped face and plump cupid-bow lips, but everything else on that baby was him.

"Nova…thank you," he said.

He squeezed his eyes shut and made a vow. No one would ever shame Nova for having Terrina. People could keep it in the groupchat about the adulterous affair. Their baby came to them beyond the depths of pain and confusion. Love created her. Nothing more, nothing less.

He heard the murmurings and loud chatter out front. English and Gullah-laced conversations rambled on, but Terry was in a love bubble with Terrina and Nova. Terrina started fretting and moving her limbs about.

"Sit on the bed, Terry. I need to feed her."

He stood and gave up the chair for Nova, then handed her the baby. Nova slid the top of her wrap dress aside and pulled down the flap on her dark blue maternity bra that revealed a heavy breast. Terrina's little body started bouncing with anticipation. She stuck out her tongue and made sucking motions.

"Yes, mommy is going to feed you now," Nova said in a singsong voice.

His heart melted when he witnessed Terrina's slobbery smile for the first time in person. She latched onto the nipple and her chunky cheeks puffed in and out as she fed. Nova rubbed her hair and Terrina stared at her mother with peace in her eyes. Her little feet kicked up, and he touched her toes again.

"I can't believe we made her," he said.

"We did."

Terrina actively sucked away, keeping her little green eyes on Nova's face. Occasionally, her eyes wandered to look at him, still trying to figure out who the unknown man in the room was. Eventually, she released the one nipple from her small mouth and Nova offered her the other one.

"She feeds from each breast…you can tell when she's ready to switch by the way she bounces and slows down on sucking," Nova told him.

Terry kissed Nova on the cheek. He observed it all with wonderment.

"I have a breast pump, so you'll be helping with this," she teased.

"I'm ready," he said.

A creaking sound on a floorboard caught their attention. Mawmaw pushed her walker near the doorway.

"Oonah stomach in ya back?" Mawmaw asked him.

"Excuse me, ma'am?" Terry asked.

Nova giggled. Mawmaw looked at her.

"Axum fuh me," Mawmaw said.

Nova smiled at Terry.

"Are you hungry? We've got plenty of leftovers."

His stomach growled and for the first time, Mawmaw grinned at him.

"Wolf in his belly. C'mon…fixin' ya plate…"

Mawmaw turned around and shuffled off.

"Go get something to eat. We'll be right here waiting for you," Nova said.

He lowered his head and kissed her firmly on the lips. She parted her lips, and he sought the familiar taste of her tongue to remind himself that she belonged to him. Terrina swatted a chubby finger on his cheek and he kissed her small hand and forehead. Baby powder and Johnson's baby lotion scents wafted into his nose. He wanted to stay but his stomach snitched on him again. Starving.

Terry followed Mawmaw as she rolled her walker past a small dining room into her kitchen. A stove full of big pots and pans caught his eyes, as well as a kitchen table displaying the remains of leftover homemade biscuits, white gravy, link sausages, fried potatoes, and scrambled eggs. Mawmaw pointed to an empty chair at the far end of the table near the window. A dark-skinned woman in her fifties with short red-dyed locs sat across from him, finishing up a plate of food.

"How you doing? I'm Terry."

"I'm doing well this Sunday. I'm Brielle."

Brielle broke apart a biscuit and smothered it in gravy.

"You drove here, huh?"

"Yes, ma'am. Thirty-seven hours with two catnaps."

"My goodness. By yourself?"

"Yes."

Mawmaw lifted a plate on the counter and scooped out a healthy serving of yellow grits and covered it in shrimp and gravy.

"You have shrimp and grits before?" Brielle asked.

"My mama makes it."

"Where you from?"

"Cypress Bend, Louisiana."

"That's where you drove from?"

"I came from California…I can get that," he said.

He stood and took the plate and a fork from Mawmaw so she wouldn't have to struggle to move around. She turned and sat on the small seat connected to her walker. He closed his eyes and prayed over his food and when he opened them back up, Mawmaw seemed pleased by the act.

"Una go to church, young man?" Mawmaw asked.

"Not as much as I should. I used to sing in the choir at my church back home. I was raised Baptist."

Mawmaw nodded.

"What oonah parents think 'bout whatchu did?" Mawmaw asked.

"Mawmaw, let him eat his food," Brielle said.

"My house, I talk when I want."

Pauletta popped in and went directly to Mawmaw.

"Mawmaw, Mrs. Tinely is outside. She brought you some of her collards."

Mawmaw, stood and turned her walker toward the front room. Pauletta followed behind her. Terry dug into the food. It was still warm and savory. The grits were creamy with butter, and the gravy was packed with salty bacon and onion bits. Garlic and bell peppers rounded out the flavor, and he smacked his lips.

"This is a good roux. Nice and thick," he said.

Brielle wiped crumbs from her bottom lip with a napkin.

"Listen to me good, Terry. This family has been in an uproar about this situation with you and Nova. We love Terrina…she's blood and she ain't did nothing wrong coming into the world. I think what you did is wrong, but I understand how things can happen. Shit, we dragged Jordan by his edges, too and it caused a rift between our two families. Mawmaw won't even let him come inside the house anymore. I hope your intentions being here are good for Nova's sake…and my grand-niece."

"They are. I love, Nova."

"Jordan said he loved her, too. Words don't mean nothin' to me. We got two babies who need fathering. If you mean well, all ya gotta do is show us, and you'll be alright young man."

Terry kept eating. Brielle's tone didn't sound adversarial. It was forthright. He acted the same way.

"Who called Nova a whore?"

Brielle blinked twice, and her lips moved slightly to the right of her face.

"Uncle Pete is old school. A deacon in the church. Old people don't mince words."

"I don't either."

She grinned.

"Okay now, that's real good. Don't back down from the naysayers. However, if the Patterson family find out you're here, things might get outta hand. None of them wanna see you 'round these parts."

Terry piled a few sausages on his plate with a biscuit.

"Nobody can run me off from my baby or Nova. I'm taking her with me when I leave. Her and the children."

"Say what now?"

"I didn't come this far to visit and leave by myself. I'm taking my family with me."

"She's not even divorced yet."

"Does she have full custody of Van-Van?"

"Yeah, but—"

"Then she can leave…freely."

"You can't take them kids away from Mawmaw. It'll break her heart."

"Nova doesn't want to be here. She's not happy. Who would be, though? Being called names by her family members and looked down on like she's wearing a scarlet letter 'A' on her chest."

Brielle stood and touched his arm.

"It's not everybody, mainly the older ones. Show them who you are and things will smooth over. You already doin' better than Jordan."

"How's that?"

"Mawmaw let you in the house."

Brielle winked her eye and cleared her dishes.

He ate his food in silence. A bunch of children ran into the kitchen from the back door. Three boys and two girls, all around eight to twelve-years-old.

"Who are you?" the oldest girl asked.

"Terry," he said.

The girl stared at his eyes.

"You got eyes like, Terrina."

"I'm her father."

"How you her father when Auntie Nova is married to Uncle Jordan?"

Terry chewed his last piece of sausage and cleaned up his plate in the sink. He left the children staring at his back.

The adults gossiped in the front room and out on the porch. He slipped past them and searched for a restroom. After relieving himself, he stared at his reflection.

"Relax…relax…"

He splashed cool water on his face and used a paper towel on the sink to wipe the excess liquid away. His lips curled into a smile, noticing the fancy hand towels on the rack behind him. Mawmaw didn't want anyone touching her nice pink hand towels. Paper towels for everyone. Just like his mama back home.

Before he went back to Nova and Terrina, he wanted to speak to Uncle Pete.

He followed a plastic runner on the floor that led him back to the front room. The elders watched him open the screen and step outside. Mawmaw sat on her walker, talking to a middle-aged fair-skinned Black woman, Mrs. Tinely, in a corner of the porch. Nella perked up when she noticed him.

"Which one of these men out here is Uncle Pete?" Terry asked.

Nella turned her head to show him, but the older man stepped forward. Pete looked to be in his mid-sixties, with a paunchy belly and umber skin. His receding hairline added a few years to his appearance, and the dull brown church slacks and tan button-up shirt screamed conservative and cheap.

"I'm Uncle Pete," the man boomed with a voice almost as deep as Terry's.

"May I speak to you, sir, in private?"

Nella gave Pete a look, and the older man glanced around to see if anyone heard Terry. They did. He followed Pete down the steps with several sets of curious eyes tracking them from the porch. The two men stepped to the right side of the stairs that led to a driveway with part of the house acting as a carport covering. Blue glass bottles decorated a small tree at the edge of the property. Sunlight struck a few of the bottles, creating streaks of blue diffuse refection against the side of the house. He recognized the tradition that was done in Louisiana, too. Used for protection and to ward off evil, his daddy called them spirit bottles. His grandmother in Yazoo, Mississippi had one. The blue color was meant to imitate water and thwart troublesome entities from bothering the home since they couldn't cross over running water. The bottles were supposed to trap them if they dared to trick their way near.

Pete folded his arms across his chest.

"What do you want to speak with me about?"

"I heard that you called Nova a whore because she gave birth to my daughter."

Pete tilted his head and spoke boldly.

"Do not prostitute thy daughter, to cause her to be a whore…lest the land fall to whoredom, and the land become full of wickedness."

Terry stepped closer to Pete, lowering his head so he could look the man directly in the eyes.

"Respectfully, sir, no man, especially a man of God, should disrespect his niece by calling her a whore."

"Tell him!" Nella said.

"Nella!"

Mawmaw's voice echoed loud above them.

Pete looked past Terry. Nella stared down at them with Mawmaw, Brielle and the other men present. Sweat traced several paths on Pete's face from the rising temperature and the sun hanging directly overhead. A glint of blue bottle reflection speckled his cheek.

"Men are talking," Mawmaw said.

"Talk to him, Terry," Nella urged.

"Any anger, disappointment, or harsh words you want to speak…you say them to me. Not her. Jordan broke his vows to her in California first several times over. He'd been doing so even before she came out there. Nova tried her best to be a good wife to him, but he neglected her. Could I have inserted myself into her life properly by waiting for her to divorce? Sure… but I didn't, and that's on me."

"I won't stand here and have a snake in the Lord's garden justify his actions leading Nova astray. Her sin and your sin ended a marriage that had been in the making for years. You put asunder two large families, not just two individuals, son."

"I don't need to justify my actions to you. She and I have a beautiful daughter together that I want to support. I plan on taking responsibility for both of them. I'm asking you to stop insulting her because I won't tolerate it."

"You created a broken home, young man. Do ya think coming here absolves you of that? We don't know you. We don't know your people. Had you not interfered, she and Jordan could've weathered the storm with more counseling and time to heal."

Terry placed his hands together in front of Pete.

"Let me make this clear to you, …sir…Nova suffered mental, and emotional abuse with Jordan's infidelity. Physical abuse too, if you count the potential sexually transmitted diseases he could've brought home to her. He screwed so many women that they were sending him care packages overseas while he had a wife and child at home waiting on him. Nova is done with him. Sorry to his family, but I plan on making a new family with her the moment her divorce goes through. Jordan broke his family…not me."

Terry's voice rose loud enough to concern Nova's people. Pauletta lowered her head. Hearing the full extent of her son-in-law's behavior must've shocked her. A few of the younger men walked down the steps to watch them closer. Nella came down too, with Brielle.

"Jordan ripped her heart out and I'm putting it back in… and protecting it from now on. Please save your words about whores and wickedness for��him, not Nova."

"She never should've had a child out of wedlock with someone who isn't her husband!"

Nella stepped forward and waved her hands.

"Now…now Uncle Pete…let's not go there. You the last person who should be talking about having kids out of wedlock with all the outside kids you have running around here."

She put a hand on her hip.

"It's always the folks who live in their self-righteous glass houses that wanna throw stones. Be the first ones ready to judge people like they shit don't stink. It's time we all mind our business and let Nova live her life without a bunch of hypocrites wagging they finger. Maybe you need to call Aunt Evelyn and ask her how it felt to be married to you back in the day with all your cheatin' and carrying on."

"I'm a saved man walking with Christ now!"

Pete threw up his hands in disgust and stomped down the street. Nella catcalled him.

"Yeah, kitchen got hot and ya gotta leave with Christ, huh, Uncle Pete? Don't like it when a mirror is put up to your face, huh?"

Pete climbed into a red Escalade and drove off. Brielle rolled her eyes and glanced at Nella.

"Watch him call Mawmaw whining about this later," Brielle said.

"You know he will," Nella said.

Terry walked past the younger men who avoided eye contact with him. He climbed the stairs and looked at the rest of the family on the porch.

"Excuse me," he said.

He grit his teeth and fought the urge to check every single person there. Nova's mother stayed next to Mawmaw. He swept back into the house and picked up Nova's flowers and his daughter's bag of new clothes. Even the children moved out of his way as they sat on the floor watching a cartoon in front of an older model big screen TV.

His long legs carried him to the back bedroom.

Nova held Terrina by the open window where a crib stood. She heard everything through the screen. He placed the bag on the bed and put the flowers on a nightstand.

"Food was good," he said.

She nodded and kissed Terrina's forehead. He moved over to her and wrapped his arms around them both. Looking down at his daughter, he noticed her cheeks puffing out. Nova caught the strained expression on her face, too, and sniffed the air.

"Uh oh, someone's gone stink-stink," Nova said.

She handed him Terrina and dug into a diaper bag under the crib. She grabbed a towel on a dresser and spread it on the double bed. Gesturing for him to bring the baby, she stepped back.

"Time for your first diaper changing session," Nova said.

Oh, Lord.

Terry held Terrina for the longest time until his eyes drooped. His road trip caught up to him and he slept on the bed while Nova fed their daughter once more.

The colors of the sky had changed from powder blue to blue-black when he woke up. The temperature was slightly cooler, yet still muggy. Nova was no longer in the bedroom with him. He heard her voice speaking softly in another room.

Terrina slumbered peacefully in her crib.

Terry stared at her for a long time. His mama and dad would faint with joy, knowing they were finally grandparents. He itched to call them, but decided he would bring Terrina to them as a surprise Christmas gift. They longed for grandchildren out of their three children. But his oldest sister married her husband and raised two golden retrievers as their children. His older brother worked in a fast-paced five-star restaurant in New York as an avowed bachelor. Most of their cousins had children and his parents sulked every holiday, lamenting at the fact they were everyone's favorite aunt and uncle, yet never grandparents capable of spoiling their own grandkids. Terry broke the baby drought finally. He couldn't wait to see their shocked expressions in three months.

He rested his large hand on his daughter's midsection to feel the rise and fall of her chubby tummy. She stirred. Her limbs quivered, and she wiggled a bit before opening her eyes.

"Hi my sweet little girl," he said softly above her.

Her lips poked out, and her fretful expression humbled him. Terry lifted her up and held her close to his heart, bouncing her gently to offset the unhappy noises she made. He was still a stranger to her. He cooed and made soft sounds. She didn't cry, only gurgled and squirmed in his arms. Terry rubbed her back and walked around the room. When he cradled her, Terrina's face looked ready to cry.

"Daddy doesn't want to upset you…let's go find mommy, okay?"

"Neh…neh…" she replied, with a crinkled nose.

He wandered through the hallway and journeyed to the front room. Mawmaw sat in her rocker with Nova across from her in another armchair. Nella sat on the couch watching the TV. All eyes gazed at him walking in with his baby.

"You must've slept well," Nella said.

He grinned.

Mawmaw studied his presence and he figured the thawing out came from holding his own child and loving on her. It shifted something in the matriarch. Maybe it was the curt words he had with Uncle Pete. He glimpsed lines on Nova's forehead and became alert to restlessness in the mood of everyone there. The bulk of the Walker family already left.

He sat down next to Nella on the couch and Terrina relaxed in his arms as the familiar sound of Nella's baby-talking voice kicked in. Mawmaw glanced at Nova. Nova fidgeted in her seat.

"Terry, Jordan is on his way to drop off Van-Van. He'll be here soon."

"He know I'm here?"

"No."

"I'll stay in the backroom when he comes."

Nova nodded.

"I have to face him soon, Nova. You know that."

"I know."

He stood and padded over to Mawmaw, handing her Terrina. She held the baby close to her chest.

A late evening breeze rattled a few of the bottles on the tree outside. The lights of a car pulled into the carport driveway. Nova jumped up, and Terry retreated to the back bedroom. He sat on the bed and rested his hands on his thighs. A car door opened and slammed shut. Terry waited for Jordan to enter the house with Van-Van. Instead, he heard a woman's voice.

"He had a nap earlier so he may take longer to get to sleep tonight…Jordan bought him more pull-ups and put them in his bag with the cleaned clothes," the voice said.

"I'll bring him next week earlier," Nova said.

"You can drop him off at Boppie's house, Benji's birthday party is on Friday."

"Alright. Please make sure Boppie keeps Van-Van at the house. If Jordy makes runs, I want someone going with him…I don't trust where he goes."

"We're doing everything we can, Nova…Charles has been keeping an eye on him. You can call me if you don't want to speak to Jordan directly."

"Is he in the car?"

"Yeah."

"Sober?"

"As far as I know, yeah."

"He must not be if you had to drive and not him."

"He's just tired from earlier. We took Van-Van to the park with Erika's boys…hey Mawmaw…Nella."

"Hey, Michelle."

"Night."

The front door closed.

Terry peeked from the window and watched Michelle walk down the steps. Her tall frame disappeared under the carport where the back bedroom sat above.

Nova joined him in the bedroom and sat on the armchair. Her face had relaxed from its pinched expression right before Van-Van arrived.

"Nella has Van-Van," she said.

Heaviness pressed down on the room. Reality sunk in for Terry. Nova's life and the life of the children were in his hands. He reached over and held her hand, threading their fingers together.

"Why did you leave Jordan? Did he cheat again?"

Nova lowered her gaze to their hands clasped together and shook her head.

"His friend Charles got him a job at the port authority…helping to manage the trailers and containers. He makes decent money. I thought we were going to be okay, but then…I started finding tiny plastic baggies around the house…in his car. There were extreme mood swings. He started peeing in the bed almost every night. I thought something was wrong with his prostate. I had to put rubber sheets on our bed because he soaked up two mattresses. He started losing weight, and his face looked gaunt. I thought he was sick and begged him to get help. People I didn't know started hanging out with him. White guys. Backwoods lookin' people. At first I thought they were his new co-workers, but Charles said they were a rough crowd that hung out at a bar I've never been to before. A bunch of drug dealers and users. I showed Charles the little bags, and he told me Jordan was hooked on meth. God, Terry, I wish he was seeing another woman."

She covered her face with her hands.

"Take your time," he said.

She ran a nervous hand over the curls at her nape.

"I confronted him about it and he promised to stop. I changed Van-Van's name during that time because I could see the writing on the wall. He agreed to the change as long as I stayed with him. I did so only to get his signature for the legal documents. I called his parents and told them what was going on. His family did an intervention, and he checked into rehab. He came home and two weeks later…I found the baggies again. That's when I left him. Took Van-Van to my brother's house and then moved here after Terrina was born."

Nova took a deep breath and rubbed her forehead.

"I filed for a no-fault divorce. We have to live apart for a length of time and I'm hoping it'll be finalized by Christmas or New Year's at the latest. I requested full custody of both children and he gave it because he didn't want me filing about his drug use. I just don't understand how someone who had everything handed to him could ruin his life on purpose. He comes from a solid family…had a promising military career. Our families are so close. The man isn't stupid. He skipped going to college because he wanted to be a marine his whole life like his dad. I thought our life was going to be perfect. But then he left for basic training…"

Nova leaned her elbow on the armrest and covered her mouth.

"What kind of man throws his life away…the life of his son and wife, too…for nothing?" she asked.

Terry pulled her onto the bed with him. They laid back and faced each other.

"I went to Oceanside thinking my dream had come true. The boy I was crazy about grew up into this handsome, virile man… a soldier…yet it all turned into a nightmare. When I look back on it, I really think he wanted me pregnant because he didn't think I'd leave him because of our families being tight. He had the nerve to tell me after I handed him our divorce papers that we'd get back together again because no one wants a single mom with two kids."

"What happened when he found out about Terrina?"

Her eyebrows knitted together. It took her a long time to gather her thoughts.

"When she came out of me, none of us suspected anything. She was all wrinkled and very sensitive to light. Her eyes looked puffy, and she slept a lot. It was her ears that caught my attention after I brought her home. Then…it was clear by the eyes that she was yours. Jordy was the first and only man I ever slept with until you came along. I believed Jordy was my one true love, so even when we were on the outs, I never let any other man inside of me."

She stroked his shirt.

"The first time I met you, I thought to myself, 'That is the type of man I want Jordy to become'. When I got to know you better, I knew Jordy didn't have it in him to be like you."

He pulled her in closer. She spoke in a whisper.

"I was attracted to you the first time I met you, Terry. I took one look at your face and got scared…like I knew my life was all wrong…like I'd made a mistake. The first time I kissed you, I knew you were my destiny. Jordy was out getting high when Terrina was born. He visited us at the hospital lit as hell. His family pressured him to clean up again a few days later, and that's when he found out. He saw Terrina's eyes and got real quiet. Scary quiet. I confessed to him everything. He cried…cursed your name…cursed me while I held her in my arms. My brother put him out of the house and we didn't talk for about a week. He came back and said he would claim Terrina as his daughter, no matter what. Said I got my lick back by having another man's baby, but I was still his legal wife and the law would see him as Terrina's father because his name was on the birth certificate. As far as he was concerned, Terrina was his daughter and he would take the L and deal with it. I called Bethany because you had changed your number. She told me to do right by Terrina and tell you the truth. It took me a month to get the courage, and even then, all I could do was send you a picture and my new number. Jordy didn't want anyone to know. Instead of leaving me alone, he got it in his head that he would raise Terrina. I told him I was going to tell you. That's when he threatened to kill you and me if you ever came into the picture."

Terry's body tensed.

"He threatened physical violence against you?"

She nodded.

"Did you tell anyone? Get a restraining order or anything?"

"I went to the magistrate's office, but in order to file a complaint, you must have two incidents of harassment, stalking, or anything else threatening."

"What about when he cursed you out about the baby?"

"He was angry and directed most of his hate at you. Besides, he has a cousin who works in that department, and another cousin who is a cop here. They'd lie on his behalf to protect him and keep their family's reputation intact. I kept the paperwork and let Jordy know if he ever did anything, I would file anyway, and then head to family court to deny him visitation rights with Van-Van. God…none of them witnessed what I went through with him in California. They coddled him and turned me into the villain who tore the marriage apart. I hate it here so much."

"We have to get tests done for me and Terrina. I have to file paternity rights with the court. I want his name off her birth certificate. Nova…I want to take you and the children to Louisiana for Christmas. I haven't told my family about you and Terrina yet because I want to surprise them. I have plenty of leave time to deal with court stuff and spend time here getting to know my baby. But I have to speak with Jordan this week. I can't hide from him. Things will get uncomfortable, but the sooner he knows I'm in the picture, he'll have to come to terms with going through me for anything dealing with you."

"I want to be with you, Terry. I don't want my kids growing up around him. He'll put up a fight with me taking Van-Van away, and I don't want to deal with that or his family."

She broke down in tears.

He wiped her tears away and kissed her nose.

"I don't have much in savings or anything. The only money I get now is what Jordy gives me for the kids. I can get a job when we go to California."

"Don't worry about money or working. I have enough to cover us and I'm making some investments soon for long-term financial moves. We'll figure out a budget and expenses while I'm here… together. My condo's lease ends next August. I'll let you decide where we live. I don't even mind commuting if you want to try that TV station internship again."

Her eyes shined with delight at the idea. She'd lost so much with her goals. He was determined to give her those opportunities back.

Someone knocked on the bedroom door.

Terry removed himself from the bed and opened the door. Nella stood before him.

"Hey…the kids want to be with you, Nova. Terry, I made up the pullout bed for you to sleep on in the front room. Mawmaw doesn't want you sleeping in the bedroom with Nova because Van-Van shares the bed with her."

"I'm okay with that," he said.

"I'll bring them in here. Mawmaw is going to bed now."

He nodded and took a seat in the armchair. Nella returned holding a sleeping Terrina. She ushered Van-Van inside. The boy rubbed at his eyes.

"Hi, Van-Van," Terry whispered.

Nella put Terrina in her crib, and Nova pulled her son onto her lap.

"Night y'all," Nella said.

Van-Van stared at Terry with open curiosity.

"I suppose you don't remember me at all, huh, buddy? I was your godfather for a minute."

The toddler leaned into Nova's chest. His little 'fro was an explosion of thick corkscrew curls about three inches long.

"I'll let you two get ready for bed," he said.

He left the room and meandered back to where he would sleep. Two blankets were folded and stacked for him in the middle of the made-up sleeper. He stepped out of the house and drove his truck into the driveway. There were still two bags in the backseat, along with his duffle bag of clothes and toiletries. He left his two rollerbags of clothes under the truck bed covering. No need to pull them out until they left town.

He showered and changed his clothes in the bathroom, donning a thin t-shirt and plain blue pajama bottoms. Brushing his teeth, he settled in for the night. He pulled a wave cap over his hair and returned to the front room. The sleeper bed wasn't too lumpy. The mattress was thin, though.

He fell asleep thinking about Nova in the next room.

Terry awoke to find Nova sitting in the armchair across from the sofa bed, feeding Terrina. He glanced at his phone on the end table. Four in the morning. She looked exhausted and half asleep. Terrina released her nipple and wiggled in her arms.

"Here, give her to me. You go back to bed," he said.

Nova handed him the baby, and he rested Terrina on his chest. Right near his heart.

"Go on," he said.

Nova lingered.

"I'm so happy you're here," she said.

He puckered his lips, and she kissed him.

"Bring her to me if she becomes too much."

"She's never too much for me."

"I'm going to use the pump to make a bottle for you, in case she needs to be fed again in the next couple of hours. I'll put it in the fridge. There's a bottle warmer on the counter right next to the toaster. You can drop it in and press the 'on' button. It's already pre-set for the temperature."

Nova touched her bottom lip and her eyes looked off into the distance as if she were trying to remember something else.

"Nova…baby…I'll figure it all out. I know where the diapers, wipes and creams are. Go sleep. I got this. When she's back to sleep, I'll put her in the crib. I have the baby monitor right there if she wakes up again."

Nova wandered back to the bedroom. The soft suction of the breast pump hummed after a few minutes. He looked down at Terrina.

"You and me? Tag team?" he said, softly.

He rubbed her back gently, and she released a little burp that made him smile. Listening to the sounds of the old house, it didn't take long to hear Nova's footsteps moving into the kitchen, putting a bottle away. She ducked her head back in.

"I was able to make two bottles," she whispered.

"Okay. We're good here."

She went back to the bedroom.

Holding his child so close, Terry felt like the world had grown bigger with Terrina in it. Used to living day by day, no further than the week ahead of him, he now had to consider years into the future. She wouldn't always stay a tiny baby. She'd learn to walk, talk…run. He couldn't worry about protecting the country anymore from outside threats. He had to hone in on the tiny girl on his chest from now on… his flesh and blood, not the unknown citizens he trained other men to go fight for.

The world could be a dangerous place, and little girls needed fathers who would slay dragons for them. His precious baby slept on his chest for about an hour before he was positive she wouldn't wake up if he moved. He carried her into the back bedroom and quietly put her back in the crib.

Van-Van slept against Nova's side. He watched them both sleep for a minute and then returned to the sofa bed. Sleep wouldn't come to him, so he watched the color of the sky slowly change into pale pastels to bring in the new day. Terrina's soft whimpering crackled on the baby monitor. He rose from his bed and entered the back bedroom again, getting a feel for everything Nova had to do twenty-four seven. Finding the baby's diaper clean, he picked her up; she stared at him, her tiny lips forming shapes as she stuck her tongue in and out.

"Somebody's hungry again. Good Lord, little girl, you'll be as big as daddy if you keep eating so much."

The corners of Terrina's lips went up at the sound of his voice, and she opened her mouth, making breathy sounds. He grinned at her and she gave him the biggest smile that melted his heart.

"Daddy loves you," he whispered.

Nova rolled over and looked at them.

"Sleep some more," he said.

He walked out carrying Terrina and went to the kitchen. Heating the baby bottle was easy and soon enough he was in the front room armchair feeding his daughter an early breakfast. Around seven thirty, Mawmaw and Nella roused up and started cooking breakfast, using the leftovers from Sunday's breakfast.

Mawmaw peeked at him holding Terrina.

"She take to una, real good, huh?"

"Yes, ma'am."

Van-Van ran in and hugged her.

"Mornin'," Mawmaw said.

She patted Van-Van's hair and Nova came out to join him wearing a robe.

"Got some sleep?" Mawmaw said.

"Thanks to Terry."

"Breakfast is ready. Y'all come on in here," Nella said.

Terry could tell Mawmaw wanted to hold Terrina, but she moved her walker toward the dining room. He started following them, but stopped when he smelled a sudden odor. He sniffed and looked at Terrina. Her cheeks puffed out like she had jawbreaker candies stuck in them. Stink-stink.

He changed her diaper and enjoyed the rest of the day with his new family. Mawmaw started talking to him about his life and Nella listened in while weaving sweetgrass baskets with Nova on the porch. The women's nimble fingers wove the pleasant-smelling plant fiber using a long nail and twisting the long strands of sweetgrass around. Nella sold them in a little shop she co-owned with a cousin and also online.

Mawmaw was a master basketweaver and taught her children and grandchildren the skill. Nova instructed him on how to start his own basket and he was able to weave a little coaster for his beers. She showed him the round earrings she made for herself and wore them proudly. There was something sacred about watching the women weave as Mawmaw overlooked their work with advice and suggestions on the designs. He admired the baskets around the house that were over a hundred years old and crafted by Mawmaw's aunts and other kin. She told him stories about cymbee spirits in the rivers surrounding the island and warned him about trickster mermaids in the ocean who loved to seduce handsome men and drag them to their watery world. Terry grinned and Mawmaw teased him, "They like a big fella like una. Watch out now!" Nova giggled with embarrassment witnessing her grandmother warming up to him further.

In the late afternoon, he went for a walk to the beach with Nova and the children. She fitted his shoulders and midsection with a stretchy orange baby wrap, and placed Terrina in it so he could carry her while she held Van-Van's hand. A shyness came over her as they joined hands for the first time in public. Van-Van's curiosity about him would transform their relationship. This was their first step in becoming something new in the world together.

They watched Van-Van run around on the beach with his toddler waddle. Terrina fell asleep, and he loved the feel of her warm little body snug against his. On the way back, they stopped by the bottle tree so Van-Van could look at the pretty blue colors sparkle in the sunlight.

After putting the children down for a nap, he and Nova called to make an appointment for the paternity test. They also narrowed down a choice of lawyers to a Black woman with a solid reputation. He called and spoke to her directly, making a personal appointment for Wednesday.

By dinner, Terry grew comfortable in Mawmaw's house. He washed the dishes and looked after the children with Mawmaw while Nova helped Nella clean the porch. They laughed and told jokes and seemed at peace until Nova's father showed up.

Mr. Titus Easton was fifty-one, broad-shouldered, good-looking, with a cleft chin, and a boisterous energy about him. It reminded Terry of Jordan.

"Terry, this is my father. Daddy, this is…well, you know who he is," Nova said.

Mawmaw and Nella left the front room to find other things to do in the house. Van-Van played with the Captain America doll, and Nova held their daughter.

"Sit down, young man," Titus said.

Nova turned to leave the room, but her father pointed for her to sit on the couch next to Terry. Titus sat in the armchair and stared at them both with sad eyes.

"I didn't come to Sunday breakfast with your mother Nova because I was too upset and afraid of what I would say while everybody was here. But I thought about it and I want to know what you two plan on doing."

Terry sat close to Nova as she cuddled Terrina. Van-Van went on about his business saving the world with Sam Wilson on the floor.

"I contacted a lawyer, sir, and this Wednesday I'm getting a DNA test to establish paternity. We're getting Terrina's birth certificate amended as soon as possible."

"And then what? My daughter's divorce hasn't gone through. She's still married to Jordan. What are your intentions besides taking care of the child you made with her?"

Terry didn't sense anger in Titus. The man genuinely sounded worried for his daughter and grandchildren. Terry hadn't planned to talk about marriage until he asked Nova for her hand, but her father pressed him to speak about everything.

"I want to marry her, Mr. Easton."

Nova's eyes widened, and she couldn't hold back a smile.

"I see. Will you relocate here?"

"No. I'm taking Nova with me. The children, too."

Titus kept quiet. He looked at his grandson on the floor.

"Does your mother know this, Nova?"

"No."

"Is this really what you want to do?"

"I want to be with Terry. We have a daughter now, and we need to be together to raise her. Van-Van as well."

"Is he a good man?"

"Better than good, daddy. He supports me. Loves me. Wants to be with me."

Terrina wiggled and Terry took her from Nova's arms. Titus looked at his granddaughter's precious face and then studied the same features on Terry's.

"Terry is the one, daddy. Jordan was a terrible mistake that can't be fixed. Prayer and counseling don't work. He broke me…brought me to my lowest."

Nova's lip trembled, and she buried her face against Terry's shoulder. Titus stood and walked over to her.

"Come here, sweetheart," Titus said.

Nova stood and hugged her father. He stroked her hair and patted her back.

"It's okay, sweetheart. I had to come see for myself. I've always wanted the best for you and you've always been a good person who worked hard and did all the things in life right. It hurt me when your mother told me about what Terry said…how you suffered so much humiliation. Why didn't you tell us when you were out there?"

Nova wiped her eyes.

"You taught me to always try to work through problems…and Jordy and I…it was hard to tell everyone the truth about him because everybody had such high expectations for us…for our families connecting. I didn't want to give up if there was a chance for things to get better. They just didn't…not even when we came home."

"Okay…okay…I understand…"

Titus comforted his daughter. He stepped back from her and held his hands out for Terrina.

"May I?"

Terry handed the baby to him.

"Hey punkin, grandpa came to see you and Van-Van."

Van-Van heard his name and jumped up, grabbing hold of Titus's leg, showing him his new action figure.

"He fly, grampa," Van-Van said.

"He does? Lemme see."

He moved over to the middle of the floor and Van-Van ran in a circle around him, holding up Sam Wilson. Titus spent an hour with his grandchildren before handing Terrina over for a feeding.

"Come to the house for dinner on Thursday," Titus said. "We'll break the news to your mother and work out ways to help you."

"Thank you, daddy," Nova said.

Titus held out a hand to Terry.

"We can talk again…later. I feel like things are moving too fast for the two of you, but I won't stand in your way," Titus said.

"I respect that," Terry said.

Titus left, and Nova continued feeding the baby. Van-Van showed Terry the other things he bought for him and they interacted in a way that made Mawmaw smile when she returned to the front room and settled into her rocking chair.

The evening quieted his mind and he sat with Nova on the porch trying to catch a cool breeze. They held hands and talked quietly, reminding one another of why they fell in love. Each of them had inquisitive minds and they admired that about the other. Technology and new media interested them and they laughed about the short videos she posted on social media back in Oceanside, where she described life as a marine wife and Sci Fi geek. She had a couple of popular videos where she talked about books and others about being a new mother that went viral before she left for South Carolina.

On Wednesday, they packed up the baby in a car seat and left Van-Van with Nella to babysit so they could get the paternity test done at the South Carolina Department of Social Services. Cheek swabs were taken for him and Terrina, and afterward, they headed over to see his lawyer, Shelly-Anne, where they would make sure all legal paperwork went through her. They explained their situation and Nova gave Shelley-Anne Jordan's address to be notified of the legal proceedings as they came about pertaining to Terrina.

He dropped Nova and the children off at her parent's house Thursday morning and drove to a popular Charleston barbecue joint, Rodney Scott's BBQ. Terry didn't tell her he was meeting Jordan face to face before dinner with her parents. She would've freaked out and probably insisted that she come with him. He had to see the man alone. But he kept the venue public.

Arriving ten minutes after the place opened, he requested a seat on the outside patio and waited. He spotted Jordan as he rounded a corner.

The man didn't look well at all. Jordan once had the physique and clean-cut look the marines put on the cover of brochures for marketing, but now…

Meth had taken a toll on him.

There were deep grooves in his cheeks and the weight loss startled Terry. Jordan looked half his former size. Some muscle mass still gave him a cut, lean look with his frame, but the scruffy beard that didn't connect and the faraway look in his eyes hinted at the man's struggle. People who didn't know Jordan would probably see a handsome Black man out in casual dress of basketball shorts and a hoodie with a purposely unkempt short 'fro, with legs in need of lotion. To Terry's eyes, the man appeared unwell, and not just physically.

Jordan peered at the other patrons on the far side of the patio area with suspicion. When he lined his gaze with Terry, his body tensed and he halted, as if Terry were an apparition he wasn't truly expecting to see. There was no masking the blistering contempt in his eyes.

Jordan moved closer with an erratic bounce in his step and sat down across from him. For a full five minutes, they stared at each other. Actually, Terry stared and Jordan glared. A server brought them water and menus.

"We'll need some time looking this over. There's a lot to choose from," he told the server.

"No problem."

The young white woman walked away. Jordan leaned forward.

"I asked you to your fucking face if you were fucking her, and you told me…to my face…that you weren't. Some friend you turned out to be."

Terry didn't break eye contact and kept his cool.

"Why did you sleep with her?"

"Because your neglect made it easy to take her."

His voice came out condescending, and that's not how Terry wanted to sound. That was ego talking. That was male flexing to dig at a loser. False bravado masking the dirt on his hands for taking another man's woman even though he knew it was wrong. Jordan wasn't really a loser…just lost. Somewhere along his path to adulthood, he got stunted. Used other women to hide whatever internal failings he had.

Terry folded his hands on the table.

"I fell in love with her, Jordan. It's as simple as that. You didn't want her. I did. Now she and I have a child together—"

Jordan slammed his fist on the patio table. Terry glanced around. No one paid attention to them isolated in a corner.

"Nova is my wife—"

"Estranged wife. That divorce paperwork is coming soon. I'm also getting my name put on Terrina's birth certificate. I want you to hear this from me first…I'm taking Nova away from Charleston."

His words slowly registered in Jordan's brain. Tears welled up in the man's eyes.

"I take care of both my kids," Jordan barked. "Terrina is my daughter legally. I pay child support for her. Whatever you and Nova had is over, nigga. You're not taking my wife and kids outta Charleston."

"Nova doesn't want to be here. Her life will be away from you. I'm sorry, man. That's the way it's going to be. From now on, we'll work out things civilly without short-changing you. You can stop paying for Terrina because that's my responsibility as her father. You're Novan's father. Nothing changes that. But let's be real here. You failed Nova as a man. Look at you…wasting away like you don't care. Stressing her out to where she wants to leave her entire family. We can set up visitation for you and Van-Van—"

Jordan lunged across the table. Terry anticipated the action, deflecting Jordan's hands away. Both men stood up and faced off. Jordan reached into the kangaroo pockets of his hoodie and Terry clearly saw him grip the outline of a gun. He quickly glanced around to make sure no patrons were nearby to get hurt. Holding up his hands to his chest, Terry stayed calm. From his peripheral, he noticed Titus approaching them.

"He has a weapon, Mr. Easton," Terry said under his breath, not wanting to escalate the situation.

"Jordy, stay easy…let's not get out of hand," Titus said.

"Why'd you invite him here?" Jordan said.

"I didn't."

Titus gingerly approached Terry's side.

"Your sister Michelle got a hold of me and told me you were meeting Terry here. She was worried about you getting into it, and she was right…we can all work this thing out like sensible men."

"Work things out? He's stealing my wife…taking my kids away from me."

Titus glanced at the outline of Jordan's hand gripping the gun.

"Jordan, we can get you some help. Get you back on the right track," Titus pleaded.

"Nah. I'ma get me a lawyer…I'm gonna fight this. Fight for my marriage. Ain't no slick, pretty boy taking my family away from me. Life ain't promised, but death is for sho'. I'll kill you first, Terry, before I let you take what's mine. Your days are numbered, nigga."

A police vehicle rolled by on the street, spooking Jordan. He stormed past Titus and left the patio just as other patrons entered to be seated. Terry took a deep breath and sat down. Titus took over Jordan's spot across from him.

"I…I had no idea he was that far gone," Titus said. "I knew he had problems, but…he actually wants to kill you."

"I can take any threat as long as it doesn't go toward Nova."

Titus's hands shook.

"His eyes looked so dead. That is not the same young man that married my daughter. My God."

The server returned and Terry encouraged Titus to eat lunch with him inside the establishment with a good view of the entrance, in case Jordan returned. They ordered pulled pork with coleslaw and hushpuppies. Pauletta planned on cooking an enormous meal for their dinner, so a sandwich with easy sides was what the two men allowed themselves to indulge in. Terry's calm dealing with an agitated Jordan impressed Titus. They spoke about his work in the marines and he explained from his side of things how he fell for Nova. He tried to keep away from her, but the pull—the attraction — was just too damn strong. Titus let slip a smile at the way Terry described all the qualities that made Nova special to him…made him willing to risk it all for her. Her sweetness. The way her mind worked. How she made him feel whole when he was with her. How she made everyone want to be their best selves when she was around. Her low country cooking. The unassuming beauty she carried inside and out. He couldn't tell him the more mushy poetic things he felt, like how the sun rose in her eyes, or how her kisses gave him the breath of life, or how her touches on his skin turned him into sculptor's clay that she could shape any way she liked.

They ate their food and got to know each other as mature men wanting the best for Nova and the children.

Terry followed Titus back to his Victorian-styled home. Neither of them wanted to alarm the women about Jordan, but Titus encouraged Terry to find a place to stay where he could keep Nova and the children safe quickly.

Dinner was tense with Titus and Terry listening for any cars pulling up, or waiting for calls to come at Nova. The Easton household had outdoor security cameras, and that helped with any warning. Nova kept her phone off and that left her in the dark until they ended the meal, when she wanted to call Nella and Mawmaw and let them know they were on their way back. Titus had sounded the alarm to the Patterson family after they left the BBQ spot, and Jordan's people searched the streets of Charleston looking for him, afraid he would harm himself. Everyone agreed Terry was the target, and Nova called Jordan's mother, Boppie, to cancel all of Van-Van's weekend visitations with his father until further notice.

Both families were on edge. Terry found a decent extended stay hotel with a small kitchen and double beds. Nova turned it into a home for them, cooking hearty meals and sharing childcare with him. The hotel afforded them some measure of safety and freedom until his lawyer completed his legal paperwork. Titus paid for their accommodations for a month and checked in with Terry every day.

Through it all, he bonded with Terrina and Van-Van.

His daughter loved the animated way he'd speak to her and nothing gave him joy in the morning more than waking up to the sound of her squeals or Van-Van tapping his face to wake him up for a trip to the nearby park. Nova became more relaxed in her own space. At night, when the children were fast asleep, they snuggled together under the covers, their only intimacy holding each other. They laughed and chatted away the hours, reigniting a passion that never left, even when she had been far away from him. Sharing a bed with Nova unlocked a new level of closeness he never experienced with a woman before. She tended to talk with her hands, gesticulating her points with dramatic sweeps in the air like butterflies dancing. While he spoke of his dreams for them, she would stare deep into his eyes. His voice mesmerized her and sometimes she'd look at him as if entranced, even if he was just talking about buying her a car when they returned to Oceanside.

The first time they shared a bed all night together, Terry awoke with a jolt several times in a fitful sleep, and had to feel for her in the dark to make sure she was still by his side. He cherished the first time he watched delicate rays of yellow morning light touch her face before she woke up.

Sometimes they kissed. Other times they spooned and luxuriated in the freedom to touch each other without a time limit. Nothing sexual took place. That wasn't important to him. She was still healing and their reconnection started with the mental, which was where their love began in the first place. Talking to each other and discovering the hidden layers. Each night became a fun slumber party, and they'd hide under the covers to whisper to each other, not wanting to wake the babies.

He made the mistake of buying Van-Van a children's book that had bells and whistles and little noise makers on each page to correspond with the story. The boy loved playing with it every day as Terry read to him, but seemingly it occurred at the most inopportune times when Nova tried to put Terrina to sleep. She hid the book in a drawer from her son who always asked Terry to read it to him. However that didn't work because Terry also liked playing with the book, and would amuse himself with it after Van-Van went to sleep. Nova literally had to pry it out of his hands at night to hide it from him, too.

"I swear, you're just as bad as Van-Van, making all that noise when you know Terrina is trying to sleep," she'd scold with a playful tone.

Nova took him to his first baby doctor appointment for Terrina. She was weighed and measured and the doctor was pleased with her progress. He watched his baby receive a fresh dose of vaccine shots for two-month-olds. He nearly started crying himself, listening to his daughter wail after her shots. Her trembling bottom lip covered her top one as tears spilled down her chubby cheeks while he cooed soft words of comfort. His love for her soared and he walked around feeling blessed.

Two weeks in, he called his friend Von and had a long talk with him about his new life. Von took it in stride, although there was a slight hint of disappointment that he hadn't confided in him about his struggles being in love with Nova. He also called his friend Angie over a video chat and she listened to him, flabbergasted, for an hour.

"You must tell your parents," Angie said.

"I want to surprise them for Christmas.'

"Your mother will have a fit if you deny her this time to know Terrina and Novan."

"It's only a couple of months."

"Trust me on this."

Nova walked in on him with the children at the hotel. She'd gone down to the courtyard to get some air and to let Van-Van explore.

"I told Angie about us…about Terrina," he said.

Nova handed him the baby, and Terry showed his firstborn to Angie.

"Oh…Terry…aw…she's so cute…listen, I'm hanging up. Make a zoom chat with your parents. They have to know about this before Christmas."

He glanced at Nova.

"What do you think?" he asked.

Nova released Van-Van's hand and sat down on the bed next to him.

"I agree with Angie."

"Hey, Nova. I'm happy for you both. I really am."

"Thank you."

"I'm jumping off this call. Contact your parents right now, T. Bye!"

He lifted Terrina into his arms and sniffed her dainty curls. They smelled like cocoa butter.

"We should do it now while it's still early…and I'm feeling brave," Nova said.

He carried the baby over to his laptop on the hotel desk and Nova dragged a wingback chair next to the roller one he plopped down in, holding Terrina. His entire body shivered and his mouth went dry. He always did video chats with his parents every two weeks, so it wouldn't be out of the blue contacting them. Nova rubbed his arm.

"Are you nervous too?" he asked.

"A little."

He glanced over at Van-Van, who happily played with two race cars Terry bought for him. His squeals of delight encouraged Terry to turn on the laptop. Nova held Terrina for him, freeing his hands to text his mother quickly. His mother, Tonette, responded three minutes later, asking him to wait five minutes so she could get his father from their backyard garden.

The time came, and he sent a link to his parents to jump on a call with him. His parent's faces popped up together, but on his half of the screen, he left up the avatar picture of himself in full marine regalia.

"We can't see you Jaybird," Tonette said.

"I'll turn on the camera in a minute mama, but I need to talk to you both about something important."

"They're finally shipping you out, aren't they?" Tonette asked.

His mother's pleasant face shifted into a concerned expression behind her glasses. The short micro-braided brown bob she sported gave her a youthful exuberance. The tone of his voice brought worry lines to both of his parent's foreheads. His father, Gordon, pressed his lips together, steadying himself for any news that could be bad. Terry noticed the sun's darkening of his light nutmeg-colored skin from spending days of his early retirement outdoors growing beans and squash. He'd recently trimmed his beard that had more gray in it.

"Is that why you couldn't come see us?" Gordon asked.

Terry took a deep breath and watched his avatar blink as he spoke.

"I had to take a trip to South Carolina to meet someone."

His mother clasped her hands together.

"You finally have a steady girlfriend? Is that it?"

Her face became animated.

"Um…it's a little more than that, mama. I did meet someone special. Three years ago. It's a bit complicated, but we've decided to be together. Her name is Nova."

"Nova…ooh that's so different. That's Latin for 'new', isn't it Dino?" Tonette said.

She nudged his father's arm, using her nickname for him.

His father's expression remained neutral. He could hear the stressors in Terry's voice.

"I'm going to bring her with me to Christmas."

Tonette's eyebrows shot up in surprise.

"Oh, she's definitely special if you're bringing her home with you," Tonette joked. "Jaybird, is your camera not working?"

Terry glanced at Nova, and her eyes were bright, appreciating his mother's enthusiasm.

"Mama, Dad, when I come, I'm bringing you a very special Christmas gift, but I want to share it with you now."

"If it's special, save it for then," Tonette said.

Terry swallowed the lump in his throat. His father's face loomed on the screen next to his mother.

"I can't save my gift because she'll be a lot bigger by then, and I want you to see her now."

"See her?" Gordon asked.

Terry tapped the camera view on his end. He cradled Terrina in his lap with Nova pressed into his side.

His mother's mouth fell open.

"Nova and I had a baby. This is your first grandchild. Say hello to Terrina Octavia Richmond."

His mother burst into tears and nearly knocked her glasses off by holding her face in surprise. His father's eyes lit up so brightly that Terry could feel the warmth eight hundred miles away.

"Oh my, God…oh my God," Tonette murmured.

She peeked at Terrina with watery eyes. His father swelled with pride. Terrina babbled and cooed, her baby feet kicking his thighs.

"That's my grandbaby?" Tonette asked.

"She sure is, mama."

"She looks like you, oh Lord, she looks like me too!"

Tonette laughed and covered her mouth. She gazed at Nova.

"Hello, Nova...oh, I look a mess. Had I known this was a momentous occasion, I would've dressed up to meet my grandbaby!"

His mother sniffled and hid her face in Gordon's neck.

"Hi there, Terrina…I'm your grandpa…Grandpa Dino."

Nova wiped her eyes and looked at Terry. They both didn't want to go into how it all happened, but they had to. His mother calmed down, her face all blotchy and wet from the news.

"How come you didn't tell us?" Tonette asked.

"It's complicated, mama. Nova and I are dealing with something, and it's why I had to come to Charleston to get her and Terrina."

"What's going on?" Gordon asked.

Van-Van squealed and ran over to them, waving a toy truck around.

"You gave us two grandbabies and didn't tell us?" Tonette shouted with glee.

"Novan is my son from a previous relationship," Nova said, her voice quivering.

"We get to have two grandbabies for Christmas?!"

Tonette was over the moon.

"Van-Van, go play over there so we can talk, okay, baby?" Nova said.

"Hi Van-Van, it's your Grandpa Dino."

"Hi!" Van-Van shouted.

"He is so adorable," Tonette said.

"Mommy, come play with my doll."

"In a minute. Mommy has to talk some more, okay?"

"Talk to the people in the TV?"

Gordon chuckled, and Tonette beamed in her seat, so enamored with both children.

"How old are you, Novan?" Tonette asked.

Van-Van held up two fingers and then ran over to his bed. He played with all the cool toys in his new collection.

"Mama…Dad…Nova and I met three years ago in Oceanside. She was married to a soldier I trained and…well…he mistreated her. She and I fell in love while she was pregnant with Novan and then we parted when she wanted to make things work out with her husband."

"You're still married, Nova?" Gordon asked.

"I'm waiting for my divorce to go through. I gave birth to Terrina here, in Charleston, and didn't know she was Terry's until I saw her. We recently had a paternity test done and we're waiting for Terry's name to go on the new birth certificate."

"My goodness," Gordon said.

Terry's parents looked at each other with a wordless understanding. Terry cleared his throat.

"As soon as I get the paternity papers, I'm going to convert my accrued vacation leave into paternity leave so I can save all those other vacation days for another time. I get twelve weeks of paternity leave, and we want to spend that time with you in Cypress Bend. That way you can know the baby, Novan…and Nova."

Tonette burst into tears again and left her seat. Gordon nodded his head.

"You can stay for as long as you like. We can't wait to meet you, Nova," Gordon said.

Tonette returned with a tissue in her hand, sans glasses. She wiped her eyes and sat back down.

"Sorry y'all, I'm just overwhelmed. I can't believe all of this. I'm happy …overjoyed. I've been wanting this for so long…oh! Nova, I don't know if he told you…we've been waiting to have grandchildren for years. Dino is retired, and I work part-time now from home, so we have plenty of time and the energy to help with grandbabies, and none of our kids gave us any! I need pictures and video. I have to tell everyone and brag that I'm a grandma now!'

Tonette stared at Terrina. The baby seemed confused by the voices and faces staring at her.

"Say hi to Grandma and Grandpa," he said.

Terrina stared up at his face and gave him a happy smile. His parents watched him, and Terry let go of the anxious burden that sat in his chest from the start of the call. They accepted the situation.

"My baby had a baby," Tonette said, and wept again.

Their call lasted nearly three hours until Terrina had to nurse. Nova moved out of view of the camera to feed Terrina and Van-Van chatted with his parents for another twenty minutes until they ended the call.

Terry put Van-Van down for a nap, and Nova placed Terrina inside the portable crib he purchased when they first moved into the hotel. He cuddled with Nova on their bed. Relief shined in her face. His parents accepted her with open arms and no judgment.

"They are going to fall in love with you the way I did," he reassured her.

"I'm so happy they took to Van-Van well."

"Are you kidding? Did you hear my mother? She's already shopping on Amazon to order everything that little boy could ever want for Christmas. I bet she's going to have matching pajama sets for all of us when we get there."

"I can't wait to meet them in person."

His cell phone blew up with texts from his brother and sister. Even his favorite cousin Mike left a voicemail congratulating him. He shot off photos and videos of Terrina and Van-Van from his phone. Angie had been right. Telling his parents sooner would make their Christmas even sweeter together. Also, the truth about them as a couple was out in the open. Nova was excited about staying in Louisiana for a good chunk of time during the holidays. She looked so happy. All he could do was hold her tight.

Shelly-Anne filed the paperwork for the birth certificate.

Terry held the copy of the parternity results. He informed his commander that he'd already contacted Human Resources to claim his paternity leave, and spent most of his days organizing his personal affairs. He set up an allotment to Nova's bank account for the children and contacted his health insurance company to add them, too. Things were falling into place nicely.

He took a drive around town alone to enjoy the day while Nova spent the afternoon with her mother and Brielle shopping for clothes. He gave her money to buy herself some new things to spoil herself. By late afternoon, Nova texted about Jordan's suspension from his job for acting strange. His friend Charles sent him home. Terry had been ready to shoulder the responsibility of providing for Van-Van. Nova wanted to use his child support money as a monthly college deposit for her son. If Jordan's financial stability tanked already, he'd have to fine tune the budget he and Nova put together for their expenses. She had encouraged Terry to think about finishing college after he left the marines. He completed his junior year at Louisiana State University before dropping out to join Von in the military after Von lost his athletic scholarship because of a serious football injury. They both started acting a little wild and the marine discipline shaped them both right up.

Terry stopped at a bar & grill to eat a burger and have a beer before joining Nova and the kids. His mother kept texting him questions about Nova and her interests so she could find Christmas gifts for her. Nova loved to read, and he mentioned books. Since she picked Terrina's middle name after her favorite science fiction writer, Octavia E. Butler, he suggested a box set collection of Octavia E. Butler's Patternmaster series that he checked out online on Nova's public wishlist. Moments later, his mother sent him a jpeg of the book set she ordered for Nova. Terry tapped his front pants pocket. He had the perfect gift he planned on giving her.

An engagement ring.

He had to be slick trying to get her ring size without her knowing. While she slept, he snuck one of her everyday rings out of her small jewelry box she packed at the hotel. He took it to the best jeweler in town and chose an oval cut diamond ring with a 14K white-gold band. Taking the black velvet box out of his pocket, he set it on the bar table and peered at it again. He planned to do his big one by proposing to her properly on Christmas Eve when his entire family got together for caroling and eating oysters with champagne, a family tradition. He would use that time as a partial engagement party for them among his family and friends. Von and Bethany were going to be there for Christmas, and he would take that time to ask Von to be his best man for a future wedding after they settled in Oceanside. Maybe they could have a beach wedding with flag football. He grinned. In his mind, he could already see Nova running up to him in a puffy white wedding dress, snatching a flag from around his tuxedo as he tried to throw a football.

He pocketed the ring box and paid his tab. Wandering out to his truck, he had the sensation of being watched.

The parking lot was full of cars. He glanced back and forth, looking for other patrons. No one. He couldn't shake the feeling and moved with caution. Starting his truck, he didn't waste time glancing at his phone like he normally would to check-in with Nova. He backed out and drove onto the street, checking his rearview constantly. Going straight to Nova's parents had been the plan, but he opted to drive around to make sure he wasn't being followed by Jordan.

Merging onto a main highway that led to the suburbs, he noticed a dark, mid-sized sedan following him. He changed lanes twice and sped up, but the other vehicle filled the gap between them by at least three car lengths. Tinted windows didn't help him make out the driver, and the two-lane road had no other cars heading in their direction.

The other car sped up next to him and swerved to the right like it wanted to hit him, causing Terry to jerk the wheel and fly off the shoulder onto a grassy field. He braked hard before his truck hit a ditch and rolled. Startled, his eyes narrowed, and he shifted gears. He chased the car down, losing it on an off-ramp. He considered following, but didn't know the area well enough to trust that he wasn't being led to more trouble. Unable to confirm it was Jordan or some racist redneck trying to be funny, Terry continued to Nova's parents.

Outside the Easton home, Nova argued with four other adults alongside her parents. Terry pulled into the driveway and hopped out. He recognized an older woman as Jordan's mother, Boppie and Jordan's sister Michelle, along with their father, Maxwell. He guessed the other man harassing Nova and her parents was a brother. Jordan's mother was teary-eyed, but cursed a blue streak at Nova and Pauletta. Titus stayed in front of his wife as Jordan's father spewed angry words like his spouse. The Easton's returned the same fervor, blaming Jordan for everything.

Boppie spotted Terry and shouted, taking her purse and striking him in the face. Nova shoved the woman back.

"Don't you touch him!" Nova screamed.

Terry touched his lip. The purse emblem cut his lip. He bled a little and Pauletta charged Boppie, but Titus held his wife back. Michelle yelled at Nova.

"He has a right to see his son! So do we!" Michelle shrieked.

"How can you do this to Jordy, Nova? To us?" Boppie screeched.

Terry reached for Nova's arm and tried to pull her away, but she thrust herself in front of Jordan's relatives.

"Jordy is a fucking meth addict!" Nova screamed. "Stop treating him like a baby and demand that he act like a grown ass man for once and control his substance abuse! I'm leaving this place and there's nothing you can do about it!"

Terry let her get the emotions out. It felt terrible watching two close families go at each other, however he recognized the power it took for Nova to speak up for herself and her needs, no longer letting her ex's trials and tribulations stop her from moving on.

"I will never trust him with Van-Van! None of you!"

Boppie threw her head back and lashed at the sky, begging God to intervene. Maxwell glared at Titus.

"You'll let some stranger tear apart twenty-five years of friendship?" Maxwell said.

Titus walked up to his friend.

"Jordan needs help, Max. He's abusing that stuff. He abused my daughter's trust. Humiliated her as his wife. I watched him threaten to kill Terry with a gun!"

"Liar! He would never do something like that!" Boppie shrieked.

Maxwell wore bewilderment on his face.

"He had a gun?" Maxwell asked.

"He carried it in his hoodie," Titus said.

Nova stomped over to the Patterson's.

"I'm leaving this state. Jordy needs long-term help. Something is wrong with him and I won't let my son be around any of you in the future until you deal with that. Terry is the man I love…we're leaving soon and I don't want you coming to my parent's house like this ever again!"

The tone in her voice quieted everyone present.

A police car pulled up to the curb. The neighbor called for disturbing the peace. Terry glimpsed an older white man standing in his driveway across the street with a cordless phone, observing the entire confrontation.

"Let's go in," he said.

He ushered Nova and her mother inside the house while Titus dealt with the cops and the Patterson family. Nova shook with a feral rage in his arms.

"Can we leave here now?" she begged him.

"We'll head out Wednesday. I'll reserve the U-Haul tonight," he said.

The cops gave Titus a warning, and it took a long time to calm Nova down. She wanted to fight everybody. Pauletta wept about them leaving, but nothing would change their minds. Nova tended to his cut lip, and he kept his mouth shut about being run off the road. They were leaving Charleston. That's all that mattered.

Within two days, they had a U-Haul cargo trailer ready to hitch on his truck in Mawmaw's driveway. Nova packed everything she owned inside of it. She carried purpose and determination on her face, and he loved her more for it.

He spent a brisk fall Tuesday morning making a final payment to his lawyer for her work and bought Nova a bouquet of sugary pink roses just because. Under different circumstances, Charleston might've been a cool place to vacation and spend more time in, but the Patterson family soured every inch of the low country for Terry. His mind stayed on spending Thanksgiving and Christmas with his family in Cypress Bend.

"Comeya, follow me," Mawmaw said, after a hearty lunch.

She had cooked Nova and Terry fried fish and Charleston red rice with a side of thick okra soup, and he suspected it was an attempt to keep them there longer by stuffing him with delicious food. He followed her into the front room.

"Take it down," she said.

She pointed to the painting above the mantel. He lifted the heavy frame from the thick hook in the wall.

"Dat is my gift to una… and Nova. Parta we go with the chirren. Hear me?"

"Yes, ma'am," he said.

Nella and Nova wrapped the painting in a blanket and he secured it carefully under the truck bed covering he kept locked. Mawmaw also handed him a small sweetgrass basket she made.

"I put Carolina Gold Rice in dere. Nova cook up some red rice for oonah family," Mawmaw said.

Uncle Pete arrived and picked Mawmaw up. She didn't want to be around when they left in the morning, and gave long hugs and kisses to Van-Van, Terrina, and Nova. Before climbing into Pete's Escalade, she moved away from her walker and hugged Terry. Whatever litany of exaggerations she may have formed in her mind about him when he first arrived had dissipated. He was family now.

"Take care of Nova and dem chirren, hear?" she whispered in his ear.

"I promise, Mawmaw," he said.

He released her frail body that encased an inner strength. Nella patted his back.

"She'll be okay. You showed yourself to be an honorable man to Nova. She knows you love them kids fierce, too," Nella said.

He went to gas up the truck and picked up snacks for the road at around two-thirty. Edisto Island looked glorious in the early fall, and he took himself to the beach to gaze at the eastern shore one more time before they departed for good. He kicked off his shoes and socks and dipped his toes in, letting the Atlantic Ocean chill rejuvenate his tired feet. Lifting and packing things for Nova, while also running around playing with Van-Van, had his dogs howling. He plopped his backside on the sand with the tall sea oat plants against his back and surveyed the horizon where the sky touched the impossibly green ocean.

He closed his eyes and let the ocean breeze kiss his eyelids.

"God…thank you. Thank you for bringing Nova into my life with Van-Van. Thank you for allowing us to have Terrina. Please watch over us as we make this journey to my family in Louisiana. Grant me the strength and fortitude to be the best man and father I can be for Nova…"

He listened to the sound of the surf and the squawk of a seabird after he finished his prayer. The sharp scent of the ocean refreshed him, and he took a deep inhale. Opening his eyes again, he stood and wandered slowly back to his truck as the shadows of early evening enveloped him.

At Mawmaw's, he pulled his truck into the driveway. He'd connect to the U-Haul trailer in the morning. Craning his head to look up at the house, he noticed the front room lights weren't on. He guessed Nova went to bed early to rest with the children. Nella's car was on the street and she was probably watching her shows in her room. He clicked his key fob, locking the truck. Stretching his arms, he knew Terrina would be antsy to eat. He hoped there was a bottle in the fridge he could heat so that Nova could rest. Another strong breeze blew across his face.

Heading for the stairs, the sound of glass breaking steered him toward the carport. Shattered pieces of blue bottle glass sat under the bottle tree. A gust of wind shook a branch so hard that another bottle fell and broke, glass fragments shooting toward the cement driveway.

The back of the U-Haul trailer caught his eye.

It was partially open.

He lifted the handle to check if anything had been stolen. Nope. The trailer remained packed to the gills. He slammed the roll-up door back down and locked it with the key still stuck inside the lock. That's when he glimpsed something shiny jammed against the right back tire and picked it up. Nova's cell phone with a shattered screen. He glanced around the rest of the driveway, using a flashlight app on his smartphone. Drops of blood led to the edge of the property where he found Nella crumpled in a heap.

"Nella!"

Terry dropped to his knees and touched her neck. She was alive, just knocked out cold.

"Nella…Nella…"

Nella moaned with groggy energy. She came to and stared at Terry with unfocused eyes.

"Jordon…" she mumbled.

"Jordon did this to you?"

She nodded and grabbed his arm.

"He walked up on us. Nova tried to call the police…he knocked her phone out of her hand and grabbed Van-Van. He…pulled out a gun…she was holding Terrina, and he threatened her…ordered her to get in his car. I tried to stop him, and he… hit me with the gun. He took them. "

"How long ago did he take them?"

Nella sat up and touched the back of her head where she bled.

"Maybe thirty…forty minutes ago."

Terry quelled the panic rising in his chest.

"Is there any place you can think of where he would take them other than his family members?"

Nella shook her head.

"Tell me exactly what he said."

"He told Nova she would never leave him. Her or the babies. She pleaded for him to let the children go and just take her, but he wanted them all. Terry…he had this look in his eyes about Terrina. He said she was the reason their family broke up…I think he's going to do something to her to get back at you."

"I need you to wait on calling the police, okay? Can you do that?"

"Yeah."

Nella stood on wobbly legs. He tried calling Jordan's number and heard a ringing sound out near the street. Holding his cell to his ear, he followed the rings and found Jordan's phone near the curb.

"Fuck!" he shouted.

Nella glanced at Nova's phone in his hand and snapped her fingers.

"Wait…wait! Nova's Airtags!" Nella shouted.

She snatched Nova's phone from his hand. The touchscreen still worked.

"She put one in Terrina's car seat. Van-Van should have one stuck in his little zipper pocket on his jeans. She started putting them on the kids as a precaution when she dropped them off at Boppie's house, in case she let Jordan take them somewhere without being watched. She stopped letting them see Terrina, but probably left the tags on them."

Nella swiped the phone and found the Airtag app on Nova's phone.

"See, there they are! They're still on the island."

Terry shook his hands with enthused encouragement and kissed Nella on the forehead.

"Thank you, thank you!"

He grabbed Nova's phone and ran to his truck. The Airtag stopped near an area by the Edisto River. He held the phone up to Nella's face.

"Is there any place by the river that Jordan would possibly go?"

"He never lived here year round, but his family spent summers with us on special occasions."

Precious time ticked on.

"Think, Nella…think!"

Nella's eyes watered, and her lips poked out in concentration.

"The Edisto River…our families used to go fishing there. I never went because I don't like to fish or camp out. They'd rent a treehouse cabin."

"Call Titus or Pauletta and ask them where, and call me on my phone afterward! Do not tell them what's happening or they'll call the police and make things worse. Jordan is dangerous, and he's also a trained sniper."

Terry tore off in his truck and stuck Nova's phone in the holder attached to his dash. He followed Terrina's Airtag timestamps on the phone. Thank God there were other Apple devices nearby to help track the data.

His cell rang. Nella.

"Terry, Titus said they used to rent the cabins at a place called The Edisto Treehouse Retreat. They usually stayed close by the river to launch their paddle boats."

"Got it, I'm headed there. Give me an hour's head start before you call the cops."

He pulled over to switch his phone onto the dash so he could save the battery life of Nova's phone. Punching in the name of the rental cabins, he jetted there on a wing and a prayer. Jordan sought seclusion and privacy. The river was a good place to hold Nova and the children captive without attracting attention.

Since he was only thirty to forty minutes behind Jordan, he prayed to reach them before anything turned grave. He ventured into the more natural parts of Edisto and worried about losing a signal out in the wild. The temperature had dropped, too. Nova had worn a long sleeve shirt and a jean skirt. Terrina only had on a pink cotton onesie and Van-Van wore little jeans and a T-shirt.

"Don't do anything fucking stupid, Jordan," Terry mumbled to himself.

Part 2 of Lick Back 2 HERE.

A.N.:

The painting used in the story was made by the Gullah artist Sonja Griffan Evans. You can find her work at:

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[armpirate]

Did I say I love you? || Jungkook

Bf experience

pairing: idol!JK x fem!reader

w.c.: 6k

Warnings: smut, fluff, breast play, female masturbation, male masturbation, public sex, unprotected sex (Minors DNI! Refrain from reading if you're not +18, and ignore if you don't like this type of content)

Aprox. time of reading: 26 minutes

Summary: Jungkook didn't prepare that trip with the idea of confessing his feelings, but his heart spoke up before he could control it.

MASTERLIST

Boba ball: Put smthg comfy on today

Boba ball: I'll pick u up at twelve

You were quite used to the special weekend dates you two planned, it was the only thing that made you move throughout the week in a good mood, excited for Saturday ever since Monday kicked in.

Two months back, it was his way to adapt into your life when seeing you in the evenings, after you finished your shift, wasn't enough. Although most of those dates happened usually in either of your places, because even if you liked each other a lot, you knew the risks of going out in public. Maybe that was what pulled you back from actually accepting a date from him the first time he asked you out.

You knew him long before your eyes met at your company's year-end party. His aura was already powerful when you admired him through a screen, but it was completely different when he approached you first, with a nervous smile that you thought he'd never dedicate to you. You knew everything about him before you two went on a first date, but it felt like you were discovering those things for the first time as you heard them coming out of his mouth directly. You knew the superstar, and all the consequences that'd come with it. But you also knew that boy who made dumb jokes that you'd only find funny if they came from him, because his giggles had you smiling immediately after. And with that boy you were head over heels for, you completely ignored those consequences, and were ready to face them as soon as they came.

You frowned, confused when you saw his car parked in front of your building while he waited for you, with his lower back resting against the bonnet.

Jungkook smiled as soon as he saw you doing a little run to him, ready to wrap his arms around you as soon as you stood in front of him. Although you stopped yourself from doing, holding back from also linking your lips together in a small peck, followed by a new one, and a new one, until you moved your head back to look into his sparkly big eyes, when you realized you were out in the open.

"I see you're excited for today" he joked, standing straight in front of you.

"What did you prepare?" you questioned, tilting your head.

"Hmm" he pursed his lips, looking away from you, "Should I tell you or should I let you guess?".

"You won't tell me, right?" your eyes were squinted at him, knowing him for long enough to know that he probably would keep the suspense until he thought it was the proper time to reveal it.

You hopped inside the car after he opened the door for you, seeing him surround the bonnet before he joined you and gave you all those pecks he felt only safe giving you behind the tinted windows of his car.

As he drove, you tried to guess what the surprise could be, taking in consideration the fact that he was wearing comfortable baggy clothes -not that they weren't his usual style, but he also asked you to wear something similar-, and how he brought his car instead of his motorbike.

As time went by, and Jungkook kept driving on different roads you hadn't been in before, you turned to him.

"Are we going on a trip?" you asked excitedly.

"You're close" he nodded, tilting his head while he kept his eyes on the road.

That answer left you confused, trying to think what could be close to a trip, and that'd also require you to leave the city.

"We aren't going camping, are we?" you tried to take a guess, unable to hide the hope for a positive answer with your question.

His hand laid on your knee, squeezing it as he giggled to your reaction "That's exactly what we're doing".

Your legs shook on the spot, before you took off your seatbelt and kissed his cheek out of excitement. You remembered you had mentioned it a week back, while you were watching one of the episodes of the kdrama you started watching together. It wasn't something you gave a lot of importance to, just something you mentioned because it also appeared, and it reminded you of when you used to do it with friends back home. The fact that he took all that information, and turned it into a surprise made your heart squeeze in your chest.

After twenty minutes on the road, Jungkook turned his face at you, giving you a quick smile "Is it a good plan? Or maybe you'd have preferred to stay at home and get some rest?".

"Don't be silly" you squeezed his knee, trying to reassure him that you were the happiest by his idea. "This is the best plan you could've come up with".

Your words only made him smile wider, thinking the corners of his lips would leave his face at any point by how they kept stretching whenever he was around you. It was simple: you made it all better, and seeing you excited and happy only topped that full sensation on his chest that he was feeling in that moment.

He remembered the first time he saw you, and how it all clicked even before you two spoke to each other. He thought that floating sensation that people talked about was only real in movies, but then he met you. Jungkook was convinced that the moment you two made eye contact for the first time, his feet raised from the ground and made him fly exactly where you were.

It was a non-stop need since you exchanged the first words, never getting enough and extending that small talk, that was supposed to last a few minutes, to turn it into a conversation that would only end when he dropped you at home the morning after.

He didn't even think he had that many things to talk about with anyone.

"How's work been?" he asked first.

"Good. It has been a calm week, surprisingly" you scoffed, turning to him. "What about you? How was it like to go back to the routine?".

When you two met each other, Jungkook was enjoying his last few weeks of that improvised break. He had all the time he could think of, and he invested most of it in you as soon as he met you. Calls, texts, quick visits to your company, late night sneaks to take some fresh air, or chill evenings cuddling on the couch... that was what you were introduced to after you started seeing each other after only a few weeks. And right when you were close to growing a deeper connection, he was sent back to reality -almost having him regretting getting back to work.

It still worked out.

You didn't see each other as much, but it was still enough to remind you both of how bad you actually wanted to be next to the other. Even then, your minds were still linked, to the point where the smallest thing would be a reminder of your relationship, or the things the other liked or disliked, the places you could go to together, or the things you could try to eat when you saw each other in the weekend or in those secret and short night outs in the middle of the week.

Jungkook settled everything when you arrived at the place, all while you stayed to the side while waiting for him to need your help. But he'd only turn to you every two minutes to dedicate a gentle smile to you while his nose scrunched, before he turned back to the half assembled tent.

"Are you hungry?" he turned to you with a sided smile, clapping his hands when it all was already settled.

Your stomach squeezed at the mention of food. Even if you two stopped at the resting area to get something for lunch on your way to the beach, your body was already craving for something more than some snacks.

It only took him one tiny move of your head to start walking back to his car and open the truck to get a few bags out. As you looked inside, you could see some meat packages, but also some recipients that you were sure had food inside.

You sighed, aware of all the work it took him to prepare all that for you "You should've told me, I would've prepared or bought something".

Jungkook smiled at you fondly, poking his hands inside his baggy pants. He obviously had the money to buy all the food you wanted in the world, yet there you were again: making it seem like he wasn't and he'd probably go bankrupt after buying a packet of pork belly. Maybe that was what he liked the most about you. It was always with small gestures like the one you just had, with the way you never, in those two months you had been seeing each other, made him feel out of place. You gave him a safe corner, where he was allowed to be himself, to be seen as much more than just the idol.

"If I had told you, there would have been no surprise".

You puckered your lips while smiling, thinking that he definitely had a point with that, but still feeling a bit guilty.

"Don't look at me that way" he chuckled. "I'll let you cook if you want".

"Okay. Deal".

Your upset expression quickly turned into a playful smile as you reached for the camping gas box he had brought along with the bags. Although it'd quickly disappear in a frown when you tried to understand how to get that thing to work.

You looked up to him with a naughty smile, pointing to the pan "Can you do one last thing for me?".

"Five thousand wons" Jungkook answered with a serious expression, offering his hand to you. Your smile dropped at that, feeling your eyebrows slowly turning into a straight line while you looked at him "Or, a kiss".

"Okay" you giggle, motioning him to get that thing started.

It probably was more simple than what you thought if you had only paid attention to it, but your focus was on the way the tip of his tongue peeked through his lips and moved his piercing to care about how Jungkook got that thing to work.

"Done" he sighed, catching you red handed staring at him. "What will you do if it stops working?".

"I'll ask you to turn it on again" you shrugged.

Snorting before he giggled, he bent over you to go for that peck he earned, aiming to go for a second one before you moved your head back.

He was so good at distracting you. And he knew.

As you fought to open the meat package, he saw some of your hair locks falling over your face, turning into something that could bother you to cook -at least until he took his beanie off, putting it on you so your hair wouldn't be getting in your eyes and face.

While you cooked, you could feel Jungkook's eyes on you. It was nothing new from him, but they had a special spark that day. You could feel there was something different in the way he looked at you, but you couldn't quite tell what. You just knew it made you nervous, ending up feeding him every few pieces that were cooked to try to divert his attention from you. But it only had you giggling at him while he chewed on the hot food, exhaling some air while he tried to cool it down in his mouth. And Jungkook wouldn't take long to do the same for you, taking his chopsticks before blowing on the piece so it would be at the right temperature when he offered it to you.

Just like you cooked, Jungkook offered to clean all of the things that were used, singing random verses with his honeyed voice while you just stared at him the same way he looked at you before, unable to believe everything was indeed real, and that special human being allowed you to take a spot in his most genuine and intimate side, which wasn't too far from what Jungkook kept thinking about whenever his eyes laid on you. You fitted together perfectly like puzzle pieces, and you made him feel complete, aware of how there was something missing when he thought he had everything he needed.

Right when you thought he'd sit still and finally join you to enjoy the chilly weather and the beautiful sight, you saw him walking back to his car with the bags, and returning to you with a small bottle and something that seemed like a tiny canva.

Of course his creativity wouldn't relax, not even in that short getaway.

"What's this for?" you took the canva from his hand.

"I'll explain it to you there. Let's go".

Jungkook held your hand tight as you walked into the beach, leaving behind the grassy space you had settled your camping on. You'd have expected anything, but not that he actually wanted to create a memory out of that weekend with you.

It was special, meaningful... and it also meant that he probably saw your relationship as something that could be long-term even if you had been only two months into your relationship.

"Let's put some glue on your hand" he started, holding your wrist to keep your hand stable as he traced a line on each one of your fingers and some circles to mark your palm, "and stick it on the canvas".

"You saw this on TikTok, didn't you?" you teased him, with Jungkook answering shortly with a proud nod.

You knew because you had also seen that video of a couple doing exactly what you were doing.

"It reminded me of you" he confessed with a soft tone. "That's why I picked this place".

You smiled as you followed his guidance, pressing your hand to later help him pour some sand over it. When it was his turn, you tried to make sure you poured the white glue the same way he did, marking the main lines of his big hand before he placed it next to yours.

Jungkook lifted it up with his clean hand once it was done, showing it to you proudly. That was it, apart from all the videos and pictures, that was your first memory together.

Sitting next to each other, you two looked up at the starry sky, while covered with a warm blanket Jungkook just happened to have in his car -and that thankfully he carried with him. Your hands were sneaked under it, intertwining your fingers close, while his thumb traced some nonsensical lines that made your head feel at ease.

"Thank you for today" you whispered, only moving from looking at the stars in the sky to looking at the universe reflected in his eyes.

"Thank you for every day you've spent with me" he answered back, dedicating one of the sweetest smiles you had ever seen on him.

The burning sensation on your cheeks didn't take long to show up, forcing you to move your eyes away to look back at the sky as you fought to control the wide smile that was attempting to appear across your face.

"Hmm, what wish would you make if you saw a shooting star?" you quickly tried to switch the topic.

At first, you thought it'd be a way to change his focus from you to get it back on the sky over you, but it only made his gaze feel heavier on you.

What wish could he make?

He already had everything he wanted and needed, but he still tried to find the answer to your question, going through all the aspects in his life, covering up every corner, and all of a sudden every wish had something related to you. Jungkook didn't want that to end, that was his wish. He wanted to be with you, and he felt the sudden need to know you also felt the same way.

His heart pumped against his chest harder when those thoughts started crossing his mind, trying to order them all in his head to find the best way to say them out loud and getting them to make sense so you could understand.

"That the girl I love says she loves me back".

When you first heard him, you thought that maybe your Korean failed at some point. Could be you misunderstood a word, could be you misplaced the sentence in your head as you translated it. But it didn't seem like it when you looked back at him, finding his doe eyes bigger than usual, filled with that spark you had seen a few times throughout that day.

"I love you" he pronounced each word with the softest voice, holding your hand a bit tighter as he said them. "I know it might be too early, and maybe I'm rushing it, but I really love you. I want to be with you, and have these dates for a long long time. But I also want to be there for you when you need me, and look after you when you feel weak, I...".

"I love you, too".

You couldn't contemplate a universe where you didn't tell Jungkook you wanted exactly everything he wanted. Getting to know him during that time, actually spending quality time with him as you witnessed each and every single one of his facets made all those feelings that you had for him intensify every time your lips touched.

Hell, even your body felt lighter when he only pronounced your name.

His lips felt soft in contrast with the rough metal of his two lip rings when you linked your lips together, sucking on his lower lip before you moved to suck on the top one.

You just wanted everything from him.

"Come here, babe" he whispered, breaking the kiss.

"That chair won't handle our weight" your giggle built a few centimeters of distance as your head moved back.

"It will. Come here" he assured you, letting go of your hand to move the blanket away on his side.

How were you supposed to ignore those big brown eyes when he asked for cuddles?

You held onto the warm cup filled with hot chocolate he made sure to prepare on the camping gas before you could get all cozy.

"Can you say it again this close?" Jungkook asked once you were covered by the blanket while sitting on his lap.

A scoff left your lips at his question, knowing by the look he was giving you that he wanted it to be the second of so many other times hearing those words coming from you.

"I love you" you whispered, kissing his cheek.

"That won't work" his head shook while his lips were pressed together in disappointment. "You can't say those words and kiss me on the cheek. Repeat that, please".

"I love your annoying ass" you repeated, kissing the corner of his lips.

"Wrong sentence, and wrong place again. I can do this all night" he assured you.

His sassy tone made you giggle, trapping your lower lip between your teeth before you spoke again: "I love you".

Jungkook moved his head first, capturing your lips before you could totally lean over to him. It started sweet and gentle, but both of your mouths opened a little wider with every move you made, knowing it probably would be only the beginning of a whole make out session that could last for hours if you wanted to.

Except for the chair underneath you.

You only felt your body losing stability, and a loud gasp announcing the soon landing on the ground before you were actually aware of what happened.

Your cackles could probably be heard from meters away once you both made sure the other was okay, except for the hot chocolate messing up your oversized sweater and staining a bit of Jungkook's hoodie -although it was barely noticeable through the black fabric.

He got up first to help you stand up, holding your hands tight to make sure you wouldn't trip in the process.

"Look at your clothes" his concerned face made you giggle, thinking that he was more worried about it than you. "Change it and wear this".

Your mouth went dry when he took his hoodie off by pulling the neck up, making the white t-shirt he was wearing underneath rise with the fabric and expose his well-marked abs. You could feel your hormones start boiling up with that slight exposure of skin, feeling like you were back in your teenage years when the smallest thing was instantly connected to sex.

It was his power though.

Ever since you started dating, and even if you two tried to assure a normal date, the desire and hunger you felt for each other was always bigger than your willpower. Neither of you ever got enough of it. And that night would be no exemption.

"Babe, what are you thinking about?" he scoffed, looking at your blank expression as you held his hoodie tight in your hands.

But he already knew what was going on through your head. He could easily recognize the way your eyes darkened with some thoughts, and how you instinctively bit your lower lip to suppress them.

"Nothing" you shook your head, trying to get back to reality.

But it was too late to escape your ideas, because Jungkook already had a glimpse of them.

"Let me help you take off your sweater" his eyebrow raised with pettiness, stepping closer to you.

He blew into his hands, rubbing them together to warm them up before he started lifting your sweater slowly, making your body squirm lightly when the reverse of his fingers touched your stomach for the first time. The smirk told you everything you needed to know in that moment: he was going to help you give in to those filthy thoughts that flashed through your mind at the speed of light.

His nose rubbed against yours softly, almost getting your lips to touch as his hand moved dangerously close to your bra.

And you were already lost in him and his touch. With your boyfriend not having to do much more than just move his finger through your torso to have your knees almost shaking, eager for the kiss that would get you to lose your balance.

Before Jungkook could kiss you to let all his intentions be known, you moved your head back while a palm stopped him by his chest.

"Someone could see us" you giggled nervously.

"There's no one around. No one will see us. Don't worry" he assured you with a honeyed tone, rubbing right below the arch of your bra.

You both had tried to be careful with your relationship since the beginning. Barely going out -or showing no affection in public when you did, acting like strangers-, unable to act like a normal couple because the weight of his image was always heavier than your relationship. That, now that you were alone in the middle of nowhere, just lighted up by the fire he started, had you paranoid of someone popping up out of nowhere.

Jungkook was relaxed about it though.

Two of his fingers hooked on your chin, linking your lips together on a sweet kiss that would wash all those worries away, knowing a little bit too well how to get you to focus on him only.

Not even his smile kept you from moving along when your arms wrapped around his shoulders, sinking your fingers in the strand of his short locks as you tried to deepen the kiss. You could feel his mouth opening a bit wider when the tip of your tongue played with his lip rings, asking permission to get through. A gasp was shut down and drank by him when the hand on your torso moved down it until it reached your ass, squeezing one of your cheeks to pull you closer to his body and allowing you to feel the way his bulge started to grow against your lower belly. His hand moved a bit lower, digging in the link between your legs to steal a moan from you, when his fingers teased your pussy over your sweatpants.

You broke the kiss first, pulling from his lower lip, sucking on it, until it freed from your grip with a loud pop sound. Your open-mouthed kisses through his throat and neck, giving attention to every single mole in it, were also in sync with your silky and cold fingertips digging down his t-shirt, hearing Jungkook's groan above you by the contrast with his warm skin. You could feel the way his muscles contracted as you traced down your fingers over them, pulling playfully by the earrings on his left ear to get him to squirm and giggle because of it.

Your clit throbbed when his fingers digged over your clothed pussy "You aren't naked yet, and I can already tell how wet you are" his raspy voice teased you, while his fingers traced circles over your entrance.

"I haven't touched you directly, and I can tell how happy you're to see me by just doing this" you grinded your pelvis against his, feeling how hard and big he already was. "You're in no position to tease me about that".

"Get inside the tent".

You obeyed, taking your shoes off before you crawled inside the tent he settled earlier that afternoon. Before Jungkook could join you and tell you to get naked, most of your clothes were already gone, only having your underwear left. And when he joined you, he was also dressed with only his boxers, kicking his pants inside the text to crawl inside and close the zip.

It didn't take him long to kiss you again, with hunger and neediness, that you easily recognized because it was the way he kissed you whenever you were in that situation, moving his lips dominantly over yours while his tongue fought against yours.

The straps on your shoulders felt loose when he moved his hand through your back, moving the fabric away until it was blocked by your elbows on the flood, although it was just enough to expose your tits.

His tongue moved around your stiff button, almost as if he was preparing you for the moment he moved his flat tongue over it, sending an instant electricity through your spine. While one hand held your back, covering most of it, to keep you arched, his other hand reached to your mouth, moving his thumb in between your lips for you to suck it. He felt every rugosity as it got harder against his muscle, with his dick twitching in his boxers by the way you sucked on his finger.

"You're so beautiful, love" he admitted with a raspy voice, giving a peck in the middle of your breasts. "And you taste so good, too...".

Those last words were almost muffled with his lips enclosing around your nipple, moving his thumb away from your mouth so he could move it around the other one, just like he would have with his tongue, just to later pinch it at the same time his teeth bit on the other to get a loud gasp from you.

Suddenly the straps of your bra were a bother, keeping you stranded from touching him until you took it off completely. Your fingers sank in his hair again, making sure he wouldn't move away from that spot, while your other hand moved back his wide back with a soft caress that almost made him go insane.

Jungkook was too focused on the way you tasted, on the sounds you made, and the way your body squirmed under his, to notice the moment your hand moved to the front and digged in his boxers until your fingers wrapped around him.

The chilly air made you hum when he moved your panties aside, sliding two fingers through your slit until he found your entrance. He slid them into you slowly, until they were knuckles deep into your pussy. The steady in an out pace made your heart a little bit faster, and your mind clouded a little bit more, driving you crazy when he added a thumb on your clit, to tease you back by the way your fingers wrapped a little bit tighter around him whenever they reached his tip.

His fingers curled inside of you, tempting a spot that almost turned your spine into hot tar as he moved them up and down against that sensitive spongy spot, with your legs trembling the longer he went on it.

"Kook..." you tried to warn him.

"I know, babe. Cum on my fingers".

He said those words while his chin rested on your chest, admiring your face as he helped you be teared apart. Jungkook loved seeing how those lovely and innocent eyes went all lustful and dark when he did those things to you. He loved knowing he was the only one who could see you that way.

Your fingertips digged on his scalp, and your fingers set him free as your wrist twisted with the pleasure that ran over you, and took control over your body, when Jungkook awarded you with an orgasm.

You took a few seconds to get back at yourself, looking down at him with hooded eyes and a pleased smile, before you pulled him again for a kiss.

Your bodies moved almost at the same time, reading through each other as you sat on your knees to get rid of the remaining pieces of clothing to be fully naked.

Jungkook dragged you with him, sitting with his legs crossed, while his hands guided you to wrap yours around his body.

"Wait, the condom..." you reminded him, breaking the kiss.

"Fuck, I didn't bring any" he whined, throwing his head back.

"I didn't either" you puckered your lips, holding onto his shoulders. "It's alright" you shrugged, moving your hands up to his neck ", I'm on the pill".

"Alright" he purred, giving small kisses that never fully ended up with him sucking your lower lip.

One of his hands never left your body, always making sure you knew he was there for you, while the other lined himself up to your entrance.

You both moaned in sync when you helped him, lowering your hips slowly to take him in inch by inch, feeling him stretch you out and getting used to him while your walls wrapped around him perfectly.

One hand was supported on his thigh, while the other found some support around his shoulder and neck, finding the perfect stability to start moving the best you could in that position. He dedicated you one sweet smile before you felt attracted to his lips, feeling the need to kiss him even if it'd be interrupted every few seconds by your gasps and moans, or your sudden need to get more air.

"Are you comfortable like this?" he tried to make sure, rubbing his palm on your flexed thigh.

"Uh-hum" you nodded, too concentrated on the way his cock felt every time you dug it back in after lowering your hips.

"You're such a goddess" he caressed your cheek.

Jungkook was the type to do dirty talk whenever you had sex. He loved the blush on your cheeks, or your fucked out face whenever he said something that'd have you slapping his face in any other context. But he also loved showering you with love and praises when the mood asked for it. And that night he only wanted to worship your body, stare at you as you took him in and admire the way your lips parted whenever his tip rubbed over the right spot every few thrusts.

When you opened your eyes, you found him staring at you with that particular look he had given you many times before, making you smile almost instantly. You wrapped your arms around him, gluing your torsos together as you worked on him.

"I love you" he whispered against your lips, moving your locks away from your face. "I'm so in love with you" he repeated, almost as if he indeed wanted to leave it clear for you.

Your answer was interrupted by a sudden moan, before you tried to speak again "I love you, too" you let him know with a high-pitched voice, resting your forehead on his.

Your fingers dented on each other's skin, tried to get ready for the new wave of pleasure as your pulse started racing up and your breaths got heavier and more difficult with every move. There was desperation in his eyes as you looked into them, knowing your eyes were probably reflecting the right same thing with every move you made. His needy short moans almost made you lose yourself, delighting yourself with those sounds and knowing that was one of the few things you'd want to keep hearing for the rest of your life.

Both of your moans turned messier and cracked, while your fast and determined moves turned into arrhythmic and sloppy as all the hairs in your body raised with the new orgasm. And even though you could feel his cock twitching inside of you, spilling his seed, Jungkook held you close and tight, caressing you through the last few and slower moves until you stayed completely still on top of him.

The only things that could be heard in the tent were your shaky breaths, and the fabric of the bed beneath you wrinkling as Jungkook adopted a more relaxed position for his legs.

"Did I already say that I love you?" Jungkook inquired, looking up at you.

You didn't answer with words, but you did answer with a happy giggle and an intimate peck that quickly evolved into a deeper kiss.

The next afternoon, after eating lunch early on the beach, he drove you back home. Jungkook's hand rested on your thigh, while the other kept the wheel controlled, dedicating you a few looks every few minutes just to get to see you smile again.

"Are you sure you don't want to spend the night?" you asked, after Jungkook parked his car in front of your building.

"I'd love to" he assured you. "But I have a schedule tomorrow, and I don't want to wake you up earlier than needed. I'll send you a text when you wake up".

He always did.

Jungkook learned your habits the more time he spent with you. So even if he woke up earlier and you weren't together, his good morning message always showed up on your screen at the same time your alarm blasted to interrupt your sleep.

"Don't stay up too late" you asked him.

Although Jungkook gave you an accusing look, reminding you you were always the reason he stayed up later than what he planned first.

"I won't answer your tests after nine. This time I mean it" the threat you just threw at him was probably the biggest lie you had ever told him.

"You will, unless you want me to show up here five minutes later".

And he'd certainly be able to.

"You're so annoying" you scoffed, shaking your head.

"But you love me anyway".

Jungkook had been dying to say that sentence and for it to be true for a long few weeks already. And the fact that he was already able to say it with certainty that it was true made him proud, and you could tell by the way his voice sounded cheerful as he said it.

"I do. That's why I'm telling you to rest well" you repeated.

"I'll try my best" Jungkook assured you.

"Send me a text when you get home" you softly said, leaning over to kiss him.

"I will" Jungkook always did, but you liked reminding him.

After giving him one last peck, you got out of the car and walked to your house. Not without turning to him a few times to wave goodbye at him and manage to see his smile one last time before you close the door to your building behind you. 

Taglist: @ttanniett

[alwayscorvus]

Hello! Can I request a Honkai Star Rail and Wuthering Waves crossover with Jiyan? The reader can be of any faction and race you wish. I think a foxian reader, a self-destructor reader like Acheron or a Memokeeper would be interesting. Maybe even a Gallovian. Whatever you think is right, that's right. Thanks in advance 🌻🌻🌻

Once you are gone

memokeeper!foxian!malereader x Jiyan, fluff; warning!faction and "race" kinda reflect in reader's character

It took so frickin' long u probably forgot about it. Sorry. But I have like no time at all. Still thank u very much 4 the request!

And about it… tbh I played in hsr for only a brief while, because I stopped at the beginning of Penacony... (truly unfortunate turn of events) But I searched for help on internet. And after first few informations that I read, an idea popped into my head, so I decided to modify it suitably for a story. Hope its alright

In your life you have visited dozens if not hundreds of places, times and dimensions. You have met thousands of people, explored more than one story, learned new languages, traditions and habits. In the process, you have gained a lot of unique, rich and wonderful memories. However, none of them belonged to you.

You were a memokeeper. You had nothing. You dedicated your entire existence to your almighty Aeon. Your soul, experiences, memories, emotions, feelings. Everything belonged to him.

You were his best memokeeper. You always stole finest memories from most unique universes. You worked long for your title. You wanted to feel appreciated. That's why, once you noticed, that lately no memory had brought your lord to his former euphoria, you knew you had to try harder. Find something one of a kind. Everything for that one smile and few simple words of recognition.

You went on a journey. Where no memokeeper has yet managed to go. Next few worlds and their residents didn't seem really interesting. There was nothing there that your Lord hadn't already seen. But, you weren't willing to give up so easily. After all, you were the best of the best.

In the end, fate brought you to Solaris-3. At first it was a simple miscalculation. But after moments of reflection, you came to conclusion that such coincidences often led to the greatest results. Something was drawing you to Solaris. And especially to Huanglong. That's why you decided to settle there for a longer period of time. You focused your search on possible battlefields. After all, your Aeon gave them his special attention.

However, your focus wasn't drawn to trivial Midnight Rangers. Before you knew it all your attention turned to a certain teal-haired general… Even if it wasn't in your style. By the time you realized, it was too late. You drowned in curiosity. And what's even more surprising, you decided to trust your fox sixth sense.

At first you remained in the shadows. As always.

You watched him from afar. Drank in his view. His smile and gentle voice. You experienced what he did. Got to know him, his surroundings, people close to him and emotions that he showed.

Yet it wasn't enough for you.

You were greedy. You had to taste it yourself.

So you decided to take more advanced steps. And do what you were mostly not in the habit of doing. You decided to reveal yourself.

At first you planned to pretend to be an ordinary local resident. A poor, struggling victim who lost his home and all his belongings in face of war.

However, after a moments of consideration, you pushed that idea back into the shadows. You wouldn't feel right putting yourself in a weaker position than general and your rivals. You had to play a hero in this story.

Now all you had to do was to wait for the right moment. And it came faster than you could have thought.

A group of Midnight Rangers along with a general ran into an ambush. Typical, sunny afternoon. Any attack was definitely unexpected. In the blink of an eye, you jumped in front of Jiyan and covered him with your own body, countering the hit. You dealt a punch that spread destruction and left a deep crack in the ground, decorated with fainted bodies of your opponents.

You hastily turned towards your subject of interest. Jiyan stood there truly shocked with your sudden appearance.

You took a closer look at him. For the first time you had the opportunity to do so.

You saw this spark in his eyes. Full of admiration and fascination. You proceeded to the rescue before he could even react.

A sort of sudden, unfamiliar warmth spread through your body. You felt the need to help him more often.

That's how your relationship began. You were quickly dragged into the ranks of Midnight Rangers and even faster, Jiyan took you in his care.

Now you were able to experience everything he did firsthand. And you couldn't lie, you damn well enjoyed it.

Jiyan quickly took a liking to you. Just as you liked him. If you even knew the meaning of this term. Memokeepers were famous for their manipulative abilities. Extremely necessary when acquiring precious memories. Oddly enough, you didn't need to use them at all. Jiyan liked you for who you were.

At some point you became inseparable. You didn't feel the need to do anything unrelated to general and he neither could nor wanted to chase you away.

The more time you spent with him the more you learned. You even managed to come up with new ideas. Maybe your Aeon was so moody because he needed something different? Instead of war, maybe he should experience some love.

However, there were no candidates in Jiyan's way. And you also didn't feel right with the idea of some stranger messing with general's heart. No one seemed suitable. So you decided to "sacrifice" yourself for the sake of this matter.

Few flirty comments, innocent brushes of hands.

Yet, you needed something more. You needed to create some kind of special memory.

It was one of the coldest nights of an entire year. You stationed in some remote area.

As you walked through narrow paths, between a shabby tents, you heard chattering of teeth. Pitch-black night got illuminated by lone stars and shyly sparkling campfires. Excluding a few tightly wrapped sentries, on your way you didn't come across any living soul.

You reached to the edge of a camp. Jiyan never liked to set up in the center.

You looked around awkwardly. There was no door, no way to knock. You weren't sure how to alert of your presence. But rushed by the cold, you began to call out a name of your general in a loud whisper.

Fortunately, awkward moment didn't last long and man heard you. Jiyan poked his head out of a tent. Sleepy eyes, messy hair. He looked so… vulnerable. He was completely unlike his highly, awe-inspiring general's self. Truly adorable. But you shook off these thoughts in panic.

-Can I come in?-you asked with a devious smirk.

And Jiyan, not yet fully aware of what was happening, only nodded his head and stepped back, thus letting you in.

Closing a tent behind you, you cut off all access to light. In small space you were able to find your way quickly. In the dark, you took off your shoes and, together with Jiyan, placed yourself in the middle of warm furs and sheets. Although Jiyan had never had you inside his tent before, it seemed so natural for the two of you. All those times when Jiyan accidentally fell asleep on your shoulder during long war planning… It added up to one thing.

Hearing a sluggish shuffling, you imagined Jiyan shyly approaching you as he sent you a pleading look. You bit your lower lip in desperation. You really wished you could see that right now.

You slowly raised your hand higher, tracing man's face. Gently grabbed his sharp jaw and pulled him towards you in a confident motion, placing his head on your chest. You felt as general's body relaxed.

You covered him with a thick layer of furs. Left one arm on his hip, when other began to soothingly stroke his hair. Cold slowly faded away in cozy atmosphere and comfort of each other body. Still, you couldn't help but notice Jiyan's gentle shivering. He was freezing. Yet it was you who just got back out of air. You squeezed him tighter. Twisted gently from side to side, releasing your tail, which hurriedly wrapped around Jiyan. General breathed a sigh of relief as he snuggled tighter into you. You knew he liked your tail. Although he never dared to touch it, considering it your private space. He sent it plenty of sneaking glances.

-When are you leaving?

He suddenly broke the silence and you froze.

-How-?

-That's easy to notice. When I talk about plans for the spring you look away. When I ask about your past you avoid the subject. When boys beg you to become their mentor, you turn it into a joke. It all adds up. I am not blind.

Pleasant atmosphere got taken over by a tension. Strange thrill of adrenaline set in your body. You clenched your teeth and hugged man tighter. You didn't know what to say.

-So?

-You can't wait for me to be gone, that much? - you couldn't stand the pressure so you tried to dismiss the subject.

Jiyan shook his head in denial.

-I don't want you to leave at all.

He answered sincerely and turned his face towards you, hoping that despite the darkness you could see his confident look and take his word for granted.

Your heart began to beat faster and you truly started to worry. You had never experienced anything like this. But you felt a sudden urge, to provide Jiyan's safety, just as you did during the ambush. Your instinct told you that you had to reassure him that everything would be fine.

Without much thought, as if guided by your inner self, you lifted your head and placed a gentle kiss on top of man's head.

-I'll be back, I promise - you swore.

It hurt you a lot, but he was right. You had to leave. You hadn't been in your home for long enough. Though you weren't sure anymore if you were still able to call that way a place by Aeon's side. You started to arrange in your head what would you say to Aeon.

But whatever your explanations might be, one thing was certain:

You will keep this memory only for yourself.

[dreamauri]

Hi there pookie 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻 just finished reading dedicated to the one I love and I'm wondering if u are gonna release a new chapter? Like ugh I fell in love with this story 😍😩

♪ — 𝗗𝗘𝗗𝗜𝗖𝗔𝗧𝗘𝗗 𝗧𝗢 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗢𝗡𝗘 𝗜 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 - thirteen max vertsappen x  fem! driver! reader ( fluff ) series summary . . . a journey back to the p1 pedestal, buckle up

( fic master list | general master list ) ( requests )

The session had been uneventful so far. The damp patches on track were finally drying, leaving behind a silver sheen of residual moisture that made the curbs look deceptively inviting. You were leaned against the garage wall, half-zipped into your race suit, watching the big screens with that familiar, quiet focus.

Everything’s running smoothly.

Until it isn’t.

“Red flag.”

Your heart jolts before you even see it. Then the cameras cut to Max’s Red Bull, beached in the gravel at Maggotts-Becketts, the car lodged at an awkward angle, front wing detached and half-buried.

Your stomach tightens. That’s not an easy place to crash.

The replay rolls almost immediately.

He comes through Maggotts fast, carrying speed into the esses. You can see the exact moment it goes wrong—the rear stepping out just slightly, unsettling the car. He corrects, the front catches, but by the time he’s turning into Becketts, it’s already too late. The car snaps violently, sending him skidding sideways into the gravel, the force enough to jolt his hands against the wheel.

Shit.

Before the radio even crackles, you already know.

“Ugh. I think I hurt my wrist.”

You push off the garage wall, already moving.

“I’ll be back before the red flag ends,” you throw over your shoulder, not waiting for permission.

No one stops you.

They know exactly where you’re going.

The energy inside the medical center is eerily calm—like this is just another Friday bruise, another driver reluctantly tolerating a check-up while secretly planning his escape.

Max sits on the edge of the examination bed, his wrist already wrapped in stiff white bandages, an ice pack balanced against it. He scowls at the medic adjusting the sling, as if sheer annoyance could will his injury away.

“This is bullshit,” he mutters.

“You sprained your wrist, Verstappen,” the doctor replies, entirely unimpressed. “You’re not driving like this.”

Max’s scowl deepens. He wants to argue—of course he does. But even he knows better than to fight a medical ruling.

You lean against the doorframe, arms crossed, watching him stew in frustration.

“Dramatic much?”

Max looks up at you and immediately rolls his eyes, but—despite himself—his good hand extends toward you, palm up, waiting.

“I don’t need your commentary,” he grumbles.

“Oh, please,” you tease, walking forward to take his hand, your fingers lacing through his as you sit beside him on the bed. “You were one step away from breaking out the sad violin.”

Max huffs, but the corner of his mouth betrays him—a twitch of amusement, small but there.

He watches you for a second, something unreadable in his eyes, before tilting his head slightly, lips quirking into something dangerously close to a pout.

“Can I have a kiss at least?”

You pretend to consider it, but the answer was always yes.

Your free hand comes up to cup his jaw, thumb brushing his cheek as you lean in, pressing your lips softly to his. He exhales against your skin, tension easing for just a moment as you linger there, your foreheads nearly touching when you pull away.

But reality settles back over the moment like a weight.

Max won’t be racing this weekend. And that means someone else will have to take his seat.

You already know where this is going.

The Offer

The air in the briefing room is stale with boredom, the kind that settles in when a group of highly competitive people are forced to sit still and listen.

Drivers are scattered across the room in folding chairs, some half-draped over armrests, others bouncing their legs impatiently. Max’s absence is felt, but barely acknowledged—this is Formula 1, after all. Someone crashes, someone else takes their place.

The stewards are wrapping up when you notice Helmut Marko moving toward you.

He doesn’t bother with pleasantries. He never does.

“Yn,” he says, quiet, direct, clinical. Like your name is an inconvenience to say. “We want you in Max’s seat.”

It’s not a loud announcement, but it’s heard.

A few heads tilt slightly. Lando, Charles, Lewis—they aren’t staring, but you can feel them listening, waiting, pretending not to eavesdrop.

You take a breath before answering.

“No.”

Helmut blinks. His brows furrow, deep wrinkles cutting through his already weathered face.

“No?”

It’s not disbelief. He never wanted you in that seat anyway. But he has to make the offer because Max insisted.

You meet his gaze evenly. “I appreciate the offer,” you say, measured, careful. “But I’m staying in my car.”

You could do it. You know that. But it wouldn’t mean anything. Jumping into the Red Bull for one weekend wouldn’t be proving anything.

Outperforming the guy who gets the opportunity instead? That’s validation.

And, more importantly—you know who deserves that seat.

You glance at Liam, the F2 graduate turned reserve driver standing nearby, trying and failing to look like he’s not listening.

“Put Liam in the car.” You pat his back as you turn to leave. “He’s earned the chance.”

Helmut doesn’t argue. He just studies you for a moment, unreadable, before nodding once and walking away.

He’s relieved. He never wanted to give you the shot. A woman? A non-white woman? In his Red Bull?

Not unless he had no choice.

Lando leans over as you pass him, grinning like he’s enjoying the drama.

“That was either really brave or really stupid.”

You grin back. “We’ll see.”

The lights go out, and chaos erupts.

You launch off the line from P7, reacting on instinct as the grid surges forward. The track is still a little green from the weekend’s rain, and the air is thick with tire smoke and the roar of engines, but none of it matters. You see gaps.

You take them.

Turn 1: You dive up the inside of George, your car skimming centimeters from his as you slip past before he can shut the door. He’s late on the brakes, trying to hold the outside, but you hang him out to dry, forcing him wide and seizing P6.

Ahead, Carlos and Lando are battling hard. Too hard.

Turn 4: Carlos sends a move that’s too aggressive, locking up slightly. Lando sees it coming and bails out to avoid contact, but in doing so, he hesitates—a half-second of indecision.

It’s all you need.

You send it.

A bold move, threading the needle between them, your tires nearly kissing Lando’s sidepod as you take the inside line. You beat them both out of the corner.

P5.

The race is long. Grueling. You fight for every inch.

Your radio is alive with calls from the pit wall, but your mind is locked in—focused on the tire degradation, the shifting wind, the dance of ERS deployment. Every decision has to be perfect if you want to keep this position.

Lap 17: You pit early, covering an undercut threat from George. The VCARB crew is flawless—2.4 seconds, barely enough time to breathe. You exit the pit lane just ahead of the train of midfielders who tried to overcut you.

By lap 30, you realize something.

Liam is struggling.

You hear snippets of his radio complaints over the broadcast in your ear: “No grip, no traction, I’m sliding everywhere.”

The Red Bull is faster, but it doesn’t drive itself.

Meanwhile, you’re flying.

Your tires are holding up, your pace is relentless, and every lap you see the gap between you and the frontrunners hold steady—not gaining, not losing. You’re exactly where you need to be.

Lap 42: Danny is ahead in P3, defending like his life depends on it. It’s a three-way fight with Charles and Lewis, and you watch the battle unfold, knowing you don’t have the straight-line speed to catch them.

That’s fine.

Your job isn’t to fight for a podium today.

Your job is to make a statement.

Final lap.

The track feels like it’s vibrating, the roar of the grandstands drowning out your own heartbeat. Your tires are screaming, your body is exhausted, but you hold it together.

The checkered flag waves.

P5.

As you roll down the cool-down lap, still catching your breath, you key the radio.

"Where did Yuki finish?"

There’s a pause, then a crackle. “P6, right behind you.”

You smile. Good.

"And Liam?"

Another pause. “P11. No points.”

You close your eyes briefly, absorbing that.

Danny is on the podium in P3, and Liam—the guy who got the seat you turned down—is outside the points.

The headlines tomorrow won’t be about Liam stepping up for Max.

They’ll be about you.

And, more importantly—Max will notice too.

You don’t see it happen, but you hear about it later.

The door to the Red Bull hospitality snaps open, practically swinging off its hinges. Max strides in, his eyes burning with barely contained fury. His arm is still in a sling, but it does nothing to temper the storm of energy that surrounds him. Every step he takes seems to echo in the room, every bit of space shrinking with his intensity. He doesn’t need to say a word; the air practically crackles with the fire inside him.

He walks past a few startled faces, hardly acknowledging the presence of anyone else. His destination is clear: Helmut Marko, who’s perched at his usual spot, looking over a tablet in the corner. He doesn’t even raise an eyebrow when Max approaches, already expecting whatever is coming.

Max slams a hand onto the table in front of him, the force of it making the tablet shake. He stands there for a moment, his gaze sharp, like he’s trying to bore into Helmut’s very soul. “I don’t care what Yn said,” Max growls, his voice a low rumble. “I want her in my seat.”

Helmut doesn’t flinch. He doesn’t even look up, the seasoned strategist in him already navigating this conversation. “She refused.”

Max’s teeth grit, his jaw tightening with frustration. “She was being polite,” he argues, his voice sharper now. “You know as well as I do, Yn’s the only one who can fill my shoes. No one else can match the intensity, the pace. No one else has what it takes.”

Helmut sighs, slow and deliberate, his fingers tapping against the screen of his tablet as though he’s mildly amused by the entire exchange. “We’ll see about that,” he says, the words dripping with that familiar, calculated tone.

Max’s fists ball at his sides. He wants to scream, to lash out, to tell Helmut how blind he’s being, but he knows it’s no use. When Max Verstappen makes up his mind, nothing can stand in his way. Not even the quiet resistance of a man like Helmut Marko. He’s seen enough of this game to know how it’s played.

Max clenches his jaw, the muscles twitching under the skin. He’s not done. Not by a long shot. If he has to, he’ll find a way to make it happen. Because when Max wants something, he takes it. And if that something is Yn in his seat, he’ll break every damn rule to make sure it happens.

As Max turns on his heel, the silence left in his wake feels too heavy. The storm might have passed for now, but you know—it’s far from over.

[love-toxin]

just read your latest billy fic and am now obsessed with the idea of billy babytrapping you and/or having a massive, unhinged breeding kink. in his mind you won't ever leave him if he gets you pregnant.

(please bear with my ramblings below)

billy obsessively tracking your cycle and going at it like rabbits when you're ovulating. sex that goes on for HOURS because he wants to get multiple loads inside of you, just to be sure. plugging you up afterward so all his cum stays inside. constantly telling you what a good parent you would be, and how beautiful your children would be because he's pretty, and you're pretty, so it just makes sense, right?

I really think he'd get so delusional about it. burying his face in your arousal and insisting he can tell you're fertile just by the smell/taste. bending down to whisper in your ear only to tell you how full and achey his balls are getting. leaving you little gifts but they're all pregnancy tests or baby clothes. forget whatever stage of a relationship or situationship you guys are in, he's starting a family with you. he'd get such an ecstatic glint in his eye when you finally tell him you're pregnant. don't get me started on the pregnant belly worship.

tl;dr if billy fucks me and I'm not sitting in a puddle of his cum afterwards, I don't want it‼️🗣

PRRRRRR!!!! yes. im into it. now u have to bear with MY ramblings

(cws: babytrapping, fem pronouns)

Feels like babytrapper Billy is an untapped gold mine--it's less that he wants a baby at first and mostly just that he wants control over you, but that switches up real fast when you actually get knocked up. When you actually wanna be sweet about it. Fussing about cribs and a nursery and having enough baby clothes, making him take you to the ultrasound appointments and actually getting a 'tude with him because he did this to you and now he's gonna have to deal with just as much as you have to carrying his baby.

But Billy ends up loving the shit out of it. He loves your attitude. He loves your mood swings. He loves your hormonal cravings and your tears when you throw up morning after morning. He loves holding your hair back and stuffing your bed full of pillows so you're comfortable, and he loves laying his head on your belly and hearing those little gurgles and feeling those little kicks from his baby.

At the same time, however, it makes him emotional. If this is how he feels before his baby is even here, then why would...how could his father ever treat him the way he does, and did? How could anybody do that to a kid? It makes him angry at himself for the way he was treated and the way he took that out on Max, too. He's got lots of apologies to make. Those experiences don't take up all his attention, though--he has a pretty partner to care for now, and having that to fill his time over bouncing from party to party and girl to girl just to feel something makes him unbelievably satisfied.

It honestly makes him glad that he never knocked anyone up accidentally leading up to when he met you. It had to be you, he knows that now. It had to be you that he coerced, begged, and fucked into submission to make you his, it had to be your womb that he wanted so badly to break and your pussy he wanted to risk going raw into. Wouldn't you just be the cutest with a baby, anyways? You're such a catch and you're so pretty. You'd make such adorable babies. It's obvious he never wanted to be one of those guys with a handful of baby mamas and kids he rarely sees; he wants you and your kids and that's it. It's official--you've hooked Hawkins' resident playboy into a dedicated partner and father, whether you wanted to or not.

If there's one thing he loves most about your pregnancy though, it's that he loves your neediness. He loves that something seems to click in you that makes you pine for the man whose seed you've sown, like there's an invisible connection between you two that pulls you both closer. It's like you're instinctually drawn to him and he hopes, god he hopes that continues after you've had the baby. He's ready to make love to a woman after she's had a child (after you've healed sufficiently, of course, he can wait) it's like that next stage of maturity for him. He can't wait to see how far you've come and how much you've sacrificed just to have his baby, and he can't wait to look you in the eyes and tell you he wants another. No, he doesn't want you to work off the baby weight first or fuss with your hair or your clothes to try and get back to looking like you were before. He wants you now. As you are. Raw. He's sick of those prissy party-girl snobs and their perfect bodies and their permed hair that they can't let get messed up. He wants the woman who stays up all night feeding his daughter and rolls her eyes at his flirting attempts in the morning. He's totally whipped, and even with those bags under your eyes and that tension headache behind his from the crying of his precious baby girl, he still wants another. And he's got ways of making sure that you do, too...after all, he got you into it the first time, right?

[scarletwinterxx]

sweeter than fiction - dad mark lee scenario

hellooo ~ i know a lot of you waited for dad mark🥺to be honest, i'm not sure if there will be a next one. this one feels like that full circle moment. But i'm not one to close doors so maybe in the future I will write more but it might take a while before i make one. thank you again for loving this series so muchhh, from all thirteen parts of my heart THANK YOU THANK YOU🥺🤍🤍🤍

For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.

and if you want, u can buy me coffee(totally optional but any donation is very much appreciated!) thank you🥺💛

All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.

(gif not mine, credits to rightful owner)

Navigating parenthood is not an easy task, to this day it's still a daunting task. Mark's eldest son is already 13 but until now there are days he worries he might not be doing it right.

Then he thinks of you, how you've basically dedicated your life growing and nurturing your family and all he can think about is how lucky he is. You have gifted him with three beautiful children and a home you've built with love, compassion, kindness and everything good in this world. To Mark, you deserve nothing less than the universe but for now all he can give you is a luxury vacation with your mom.

At first you were reluctant to leave him with all 3 kids but Minjung is at that age where he already helps around the house, Minjee is grown enough too and knows just what she likes and when she likes it and Minsu well he's still a baby but Mark can handle that.

Or so he says.

"Buddy, can you check on your sister please? She's been quiet for five minutes. I'm getting worried" Mark tells his oldest while the youngest is fast asleep in his arms after drinking milk.

Minjung gets up from where he was reading his book to go check on his sister, it was still early in the day so Mark's thinking of taking everyone out to pass some time.

Mark waits for the two siblings to come downstairs after calling their names, the two walking towards the living room "How about we go out for the day? Go to the beach and have a picnic?" he suggests

"But mom said you can't cook, you're not allowed to touch the stove" Minjee says like she's teasing her dad

"I'm not going to, missy. We're going to get food outside then we'll have a picnic"

"Sounds fun" Minjung says

"Can I bring some plushies?" Minjee asks "You can take two"

"But daaaad"

"Nope not today, sissy. It's only the four of us okay? If one of your dolls get lost I can't find it. You can take them all next time"

The little girl pouts but nods her head. Mark gives himself a mental pat in the back for not saying yes to her so easily, you'd be proud of him.

"Okay, go get ready. We'll leave in a while"

The trip to the beach was quick, turns out Minjee is very much like you. She didn’t enjoy being under the sun for too long and didn’t like it when the sand get between her toes. It was adorable but Mark can only handle so much alone so the four of them ended up at a nearby ice cream shop before heading home. 

When they got home, Mark ordered food for everyone since he’s still banned from cooking and the kids wanted pizza for dinner so that’s what he got. Then he got them ready for bed before checking the house and making his way upstairs to your bedroom. 

Mark just finished talking with you on the phone when he hears the knocking on the bedroom door before Minjung pokes his head in, “Dad? Can I go in?”

“Hey buddy, what’s up? Why aren’t you sleeping yet?” Mark asks his oldest son, patting your side of the bed. Minjung walks towards his dad, getting on the bed beside his dad

“There’s something I want to ask you” he says, playing with his fingers. A mannerism he got from you, Mark notices. You used to do that too when you’re about to ask him about something. 

“What is it?” he asks his son

“How did you tell mom you liked her?”

Mark was definitely not expecting that question, and he’s definitely not ready for one of his babies to start asking about love. 

“How did I tell your mom I liked her?” Mark asked back, making Minjung nod his head

“Well I uh, actually it’s a funny story” Mark smiles as he recalls the memory from that day. The start of you and him. “I had a big crush on your mom, I liked her so so much I always get nervous when I talk to her, I always end up saying only two to three words to her. She was the prettiest girl in class, she’s smart, confident. I really thought she was waaaay out of my league. But she was always nice to me, she always talked to me in class, shared her notes with me when I was busy or I missed a class. Then I thought about asking her to get ice cream after school but I got too shy, your uncle Hyuck had to help me”

“What happened?” Minjung asks, smiling up at his dad. Excited to hear the story.

“He literally pushed me in front of your mom and told her I had something to say. I stuttered so bad but she just smiled at me, that was the day I embarrassed myself in front of her but that was also the day she said yes to getting ice cream with me” Mark grins at his son, their smiles a mirror of each other. 

Now he realizes Minjung has always been surrounded with love because of you and him. He didn’t have to worry because his son knows what love is.  Him and his siblings are a product of that love, and also this home. 

Everyday Minjung hears his mom laugh at his dad’s joke even though sometimes it’s not that funny, everyday he sees his dad smile at his mom even when she’s not looking, everyday he sees them hugging in the kitchen during the quiet morning just before all the rush, everyday he sees his dad come in the door after a long day at work with his arms wide open waiting for his mom’s hug like a homecoming ceremony. 

“How did you know you love mom?”

“It’s a lot of things all at once. I don’t know how to describe it, not even now after being together for so many years. A part of me always knew she was the one even before I fully realized it. I don’t remember life before her or what comes after her. I just know I live for her, and you and your siblings” he tells his son, giving his hair a ruffle “You’ll know what I’m talking about one day”

“So, I just ask her to go get ice cream with me?” Minjung asks

Oh right, Mark remembers what this conversation was about. “Yea, just think about what she likes. If she likes ice cream then yeah, or if she likes going out for a walk how about a walk in the park or movies. Just be genuine, always be a gentleman and respect her decision”

Minjung nods at his father’s words, “When is mom coming home?”

“Tomorrow”

“Can I uh, stay here with you? Can we watch Spiderman?”

Mark can never say no to his kids, even after all these years of being a dad he still doesn’t know how to do it. That’s why he always gets scolded by you because the kids know they can ask him if there’s something they want and you say no. 

“Sure buddy, that sounds fun. Go get the remote”

A few hours later, the father-son look alike is fast asleep on the bed. The tv playing in the background, casting a light on the two. That was the sight that welcomed you when you entered the bedroom. 

You wanted to surprise Mark by coming home tonight but it looks like you’re the one being surprised. Mark was snoring lightly while Minjung was sleeping beside him, you see the movie playing on the screen and chuckle to yourself. Minhyung and Minjung really are twins. 

Watching Minjung grow up, you see more of Mark in him as the years pass by. Feels like yesterday you just took him home, two very nervous first time parents. Now your first baby is growing up to be a fine young man. 

Walking slowly towards the bed, you get the remote first to turn off the tv. Pulling the covers over Minjung to make sure he’s tucked in. Leaning down to give him a goodnight kiss before going back to Mark’s side. There was enough space for you to scoot yourself in, you lay your head on his chest. The feeling of something or someone rather, laying on him makes Mark wake up from his slumber

“Huh?” he grumbles, arms reaching out to feel around the bed. Then he recognizes immediately who it was “Baby, you’re here already?”

“Yea, I wanted to surprise you and the kids” you whisper back. You feel his arms tighten around you, holding you closer on his chest and giving you a kiss on the forehead. 

“Is everything okay with Minjung?” you ask, wondering why he’s sleeping here

“Huh? Oh yea, we were just watching a movie. I’ll tell you everything tomorrow. Are you okay sleeping here? You comfy?”

You smile at his question, there’s really no place more comfortable than his embrace. You lean your head up to kiss him on the chin before tucking yourself back into him. “I’m good here. Goodnight, baby”

“I missed you” you hear him say before sleep takes over once again. 

And that’s how you ended your day, with your two boys with you. The next morning, you wake up before the two boys. You gently pry away from Mark’s grip to check on your other babies. You check Minjee first, she’s still fast asleep on her bed while cuddling one of her many plushies. She’s always been a deep sleeper. You know not to wake her up or else she’ll be grumpy the whole day so you let her be. 

Next you check your youngest, Minsu. The baby boy also still fast asleep in his crib. Now a year old, he’s a mix of you and Mark. He got your nose and his father’s cheeks. He likes watching his older brother play the piano ad loves dancing with his big sister. Minsu is the beloved youngest member of the Lee family. 

You make your way downstairs to start breakfast, but first you make yourself a cup of coffee. You were waiting for the coffee to brew when you feel a pair of arms circle your waist, your husband burrying his face on the side of your neck

“Goodmorning, Mr. Lee. How was your sleep?” 

“Better, now that you’re back. But you left so I woke up”

You chuckle at how adorable Mark was, even after all these years he can still make the butterflies in your stomach flutter all around. It’s silly but your crush for your husband never really went away, if anything it just got stronger over the years. 

“You’re cute, so how was the kids while I was gone?” you ask him, this time Mark rests his chin on your shoulder to tell you about the previous happenings while you were gone

“Minsu is an angel, he loves the baby food you left. I think it was the mashed avocado one. Minjee can now ride a bike, she’s still wobbly but she’s definitely better than you”

“Hey!”

“I’m kidding baby, but am I wrong? You don’t know how to ride a bike” he teases you

“I know how to ride you” you tease him back. You can hear Mark laugh from behind you, feeling his chest vibrate against your back “That you do, don’t tempt me”

You turn around in his arms so now you’re chest to chest, Mark looks down at you eyes full of love “I missed you” he mumbles 

“Missed you too, where’s my kiss?” You don’t need to ask him twice, his lips are immediately on yours. You can feel him smile against your lips, arms tightening around you. You enjoyed the short vacation but really there’s no place you’d rather be, this is your own safe haven. 

Mark is  and will forever your own getaway. 

Breaking away from each other, Mark peppers kisses all over your face eliciting giggles from you. 

“By the way, is Minjung okay? Why was he in our room last night?” you ask your husband

“Oh yea, he just wanted to ask me about something. Be ready though”

“Be ready for what?”

“Our son asked me how I asked you out, I think he’s planning to ask someone out on a date”

You stare back at him with a shocked look, just like Mark expected. 

“Our baby’s all grown up now. Remember when you first left us home alone” Mark chuckles

“Nooooo, my baby boy”

“Well he’s not so baby anymore”

You can’t even begin to describe what you’re feeling, you’re definitely not ready for this. “What did you tell him?” you ask

“Exactly what happened when I asked you out”

“You mean when you asked me out to get ice cream, that time Hyuck literally pushed you towards me” you chuckle as you remember that day

“Mhm”

“Now that you said that, I’m wondering too. Why did you like me?” you ask him

“That’s like asking why the sky is blue” Mark mumbles, rolling his eyes playfully

“Indulge me, come on tell meeee. Or how did you know you loved me”

“I’m gonna tell you because we’re already married so you can’t run away from me now. I knew I was going to marry you the moment we met. I just knew. You smiled at me and I just know that was a smile I want to see every morning I wake up and every night before I go to sleep. I knew I loved you when you got me a bible for my birthday after I lost my old one. You said you weren’t the most religious person but you went out your way to get that for me. You loved me in ways I didn’t know I could find love. If one day Minjung ask me again about love, I’ll tell him all about you because that’s what love means to me. It’s you”

“Oh my gosh, our baby is all grown up. What are we going to do? I’m not ready for this” you tell him, eyes filled tears both from his declaration of love and the idea of your little being in love

“Hey don’t cry. It’s exciting to see him growing up, and he’s not shy asking us about what to do so it’s a good thing. We’ll be there when he needs us, our baby still needs us” he cradles your face in hands, ready to wipe any tear that’s threatening to spill

“Where did the time go? Next thing we know it’s Jee asking us if she can go out on a date. What will you do then?” you ask with a laugh

“Easy, I’ll go with them”

“You’re not going to our daughter’s first date”

“Like heck I won’t. I’ll be three tables away, she won’t even notice I’m there”

You laugh at Mark’s future plan, there’s never really a dull day being married to him. Even though you’re never sure what the future holds, one thing you’re sure of is you’re ready to face it as long as you have him by your side. You used to dream about this life you have with him, marrying the man of your dreams and live happily ever after. 

But Mark gave you so much more than that, he gave you the fairytale reality others can only dream about. He’s the dream man made just for you and he’s yours in this lifetime. 

part1: day with dad mark lee

part2: another day with dad mark lee

part3: a day with the lee's

part4: (prologue) i don't know how to make eggs

part5: glitter pens and goodnight kisses with the Lee's

part6: first love and kisses

part7: naps and baby kicks

part8: then there was three

part9: just like you

part10: fool for you

part11: your day