#incorrect cod mw2

[ms-rampage]

General Shepherd: "Are you mad? You'd never survive this."

Kenneth (my COD oc): "Well, happily, neither will you."

General Shepherd: "To choose violence, here, is to declare war against the enemy." (Actual quote is 'your king')

Kenneth: "Wonderful."

[skyrigel]

Simon: I like your dress.

Y/n: Thanks, it was 50% off.

Simon: I'd like it 100% off.

Y/n: The store can't just give out stuff for free.

Simon: That's not what I —

Y/n: It's terrible way to run a buisness, Simon !

Masterlist

[metallictastinglifesupportliquid]

Ghost: I cut my finger Y/N: I can kiss it so it'll get better Ghost: That works? Y/N: Yeah my mum used to do it when I was little *later* Ghost: I need you to punch me in the mouth Roach: Fucking finally

[call-of-duty-incorrect-quotes]

Soap: You’re 37? You look younger!

Ghost: I let a demon possess me in exchange for eternal youth.

Soap: Haha, you’re so funny, Lt.

Soap leaves

Demon inside Ghost: You gotta stop saying that, mate. Someone is gonna believe you.

Ghost: I’m getting tea.

Demon inside Ghost: Oh, with biscuits?!

[v1x3n]

[witchthewriter]

Gaz: I sleep with a knife under my pillow.

Soap: Weak. I sleep with a gun.

Y/N: You’re both pathetic

Soap: What do YOU sleep with?

Y/N: Simon.

[tanked-up]

Canon.

Twitter//@soapsloverman

(permission to post granted)

[misquoted-chronicles]

Price: Alright before we start this meeting, would anyone like to share anything? Ghost: *lifts up Y/n* Ghost: I've only known Y/n for a few hours, but if anything happened to them, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.

Y/n: *waves at the 141 group just happy to be there*

[avaleigh16]

Y/n: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?

Gaz: Several traffic violations.

Ghost: Three counts of resisting arrest.

Soap: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.

Price: Also, that’s not our car.

〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰

Y/n: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends.

Ghost: ... Your what?

Y/n: My friends.

Soap: Are they saying “friends”?

Price: I think they're being sarcastic.

Gaz: No, no, no, this is delirium, they've cracked from being awake all night. Hey, Y/n! All of your friends are in this room.

Y/n: I have other friends! You asked me to make new friends, I made new friends! It was a task. I complete tasks.

〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰

Y/n: This food is too hot... I cant eat it.

Ghost: You’re very hot, and I still eat you.

Everyone at the table: *silence*

Gaz: YOU GUYS ARE DISGUSTING!

Price: One dinner... I just want ONE DINNER!

〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰

Y/n: If you want my advice-

Gaz: No offense but you’re the last person I want relationship advice from. You tried to kill Ghost. Multiple times.

Y/n: First off, that was before we started dating. Secondly, he also tried to kill me.

Ghost: It’s true. It was mutually attempted murder.

[towelenjoyer]

Ghost: It's four o'clock in the morning, go to sleep sarge.

Y/n: I'll sleep when I die

Ghost: We're both legally dead, you can now legally sleep in my arms, chop chop.

Y/n: Damn like what they did to your family huh, Lt.

Ghost: >:(

[unabashedcandymaker]

Johnny: If I died- Simon, cleaning his gun: Death will not get you out of this relationship

[ms-rampage]

Y/n: *runs over Captain's foot with a motorized knee walker*

Captain Price (deadpan): "Ouch, they ran over my foot, I am in... incredible pain."

[Reference]

[skyrigel]

*Simon following up behind y/n*

Y/n: So...me and Simon are dating

*Simon nodding*

Price: ha! We already knew

Soap: like why were you even hiding it from us this long

Y/n and Simon: *confused*

Y/n:We only started dating today

Price:

Soap: Then what the fuck was happening for the last three years ?!

Simon: :)

Masterlist

[metallictastinglifesupportliquid]

Y/N: Hi I'm your medic and I'll be drawing your blood today, as soon as I finish this capri sun Y/N: *misses the hole four times then finally punches the straw through the side* Ghost, sweating: PRICE

[call-of-duty-incorrect-quotes]

Texting.

Soap: The rookies are shipping us.

Gaz: You and Ghost? Yeah, duh.

Soap: No. All of us.

Gaz: What?

Price: Shipping us where?

[call-of-daydreams]

Soap: I love you

You: Why should I trust you?

You: All the other men I've dated were dogs.

Soap: Meow