#just blobbin out

[fullbodycringe]

That does look, uh, comfortable

So just netflix then

(This is part of a series btw!)

[augusta-in-the-rain]

Robin Hood season 1 episode 4: ‘Parent Hood’

Ok comrades, I’ve had a bad day and this is a bad episode. Girdle your loins, I’m about to rant.

The main purpose of this episode is to introduce The Nightwatchman, Lady Marian’s vigilante alter ego. But it also includes the baby Seth storyline which…

… I don’t know what the writers were thinking. Maybe it was their last ditch effort to establish Blobbin Robin as the charming hero, because the level of “Gisborne is horrible and Robin Hood is medieval Chuck Norris” is off the charts.

We begin with our beloathed gang, malingering with intent in the forest as usual. They ambush some of Gisborne’s guards and end up with some *destrier warhorses of the finest pedigree* as well as a bonus baby that they find in the bushes.

The episode starts off well, as our (anti)hero (Guy, obviously) has come up with a !cunning plan! to track Hood and his men. Custom-made shoes for the stolen horses mean that Guy can just follow the tracks to the outlaw camp. I like this part, the writers hardly ever let Guy show any initiative. The gang spends a bit of time fussing over the baby, until they realise ( too late) that the marked hoofprints mean they have been followed.

Wouldn’t you know it, Robin can fight one-handed while throwing an infant around. What a god, amirite? (puke emoji)

Roy is captured and taken to the castle, where Guy interrogates him to no avail, until the Sheriff steps in, with an offer threat he can’t refuse ignore: Roy will go back to the gang, and has one day to kill Robin, or his mum will be executed.

But while Roy is in the dungeons, he notices a servant girl, Annie, making eyes at Gisborne. He talks to her, and she tells him that Guy “Has another side, a side he cannot show” and that “if (she) had position, (she) would be his wife.” She has given birth to his baby, and he has promised her that he will take it to an Abbey* to be looked after. But instead, they found it in the forest! Gisborne clearly must have left the baby to die, or at least not care what happens to it.

*This, incidentally, is absolutely a common way to keep inconvenient and illegitimate children out of sight in the 12th century. One would be expected to make a donation to cover at least some of the child’s upkeep.

And Lo, it is written, that Sir Guy of Gisborne has abandoned his baby son in the forest to die.

Except it makes no sense at all for the character.

Welcome to my TED talk -Why would Guy have done this?

Let’s think it through.

Gisborne has a dalliance with a servant -fine. He, for whatever reason, ends up charming her rather than forcing her, and she participates willingly, which probably makes things easier and more pleasant anyway, so I have no problem with all that. She obviously spends enough time doing things with him other than being tumbled, that she believes she has seen “another side to him.”

THEN. She gets pregnant. She has been working in the castle throughout the pregnancy and she is still in good enough terms with Guy, that she believes he cares about her, and that he has promised to look after Seth by entrusting him to a monastery.

👉🏻Guy of Gisborne has spent at least 4-5 months around this woman, knowing she is pregnant by him (or he would not have made any promises to her, whether he meant them or not.)

Why would he go to the trouble? Genuinely, why? Vaisey would have been gleeful at Guy just discarding Annie when he had enough of her. It would actually earn Guy a compliment, I bet. Vaisey always wanted to make sure Guy had no connections to another person. Guy must have cared enough about Annie’s well-being to (at least) want to keep her happy, and to not choose the realistically easy way out: Claiming it’s not his baby, or just… disposing of her.

So what happens to baby Seth? Guy promises Annie to take the baby to the local Abbey to be cared for.

-Maybe he just wanted to keep her happy but was intending for the baby to die without her finding out?

Let’s say he did. Why would he go about it in this way? Why not just leave him out at night when all the animals are out, not drop him down a well? No, he will carry this baby in full escort of his men, he will put it down in the vicinity of Robin Hood, he SEE Robin Hood holding the baby after the fight scene, and then he will turn around and leave with Roy as a captive.

It can’t have been for bait, the marked horseshoes had already achieved what Guy wanted. And he never does anything to acknowledge or use the presence or the baby in the camp.

But the way Seth is left in the forest, pretty much guarantees that he will be found by the gang of annoying do-gooders.

My personal head canon is that Guy wanted Robin to be the one who takes the baby to Kirklees Abbey, for some reason. Maybe to save the money? More likely (by my own understanding of the character,) Guy wants Seth to be safe enough, but not associated with him in any way. Perhaps because of the low status of Annie (although men of Gisborne’s status siring children on the peasants would not have been especially taboo at the time, for the men at least.)

I think Guy likes children -refer to Childhood episode later in the series, even Vaisey comments on him being “soft” on the boys he caught. He tried to keep those strange children relatively safe by keeping them away from Vaisey. I think he views children as innocents, and doesn’t resent them in the same way he resents or looks down on their parents. If he tried to spare those random children, who were actually posing a risk to him, I can’t imagine in what world he would be exposing his own baby to die. Especially when we know (he says several times) he dreams of making a home and a family.

My head canon is that he wanted to keep Seth away from Vaisey, because he was very aware of how Vaisey could and would use the baby to manipulate Guy. And Robin could have been counted on to take it somewhere safe. Out of sight, out of mind, but safe .

EDIT: Tumblr’s very own Sir Guy of Gisborne had this to say about his motivations (you can see the conversation in the comments of this post)

Nobody likes bastards. I can not even be certain it the boy was mine, the woman works as a servant girl in the kitchen after all..... Whatever the case, children born outside of a marriage are not accepted and will always be brandmarked as bastards - by giving the boy into the hands of fate I actually did him a favour. Who wants to live the life of a bastard?

And -yes, I can see that being part of the thought process Gisborne went through. I still think it wasn’t something he would do out of callousness or indifference, but some twisted sense of mercy? I can see that happening.

And that’s most of the meat of the episode, when it comes to Guy.

He does make some *charming* appearances though:

Oh, we also learn that Marian is a masked vigilante whom no one recognizes as female, despite the fact that she breasts boobily in every scene while wearing a form-fitting outfit

Marian gets a bad haircut as a punishment while Guy makes sad eyes

And Robin has a flashback from the crusades, featuring a strangely familiar figure

✨foreshadowing✨

Lads. Lads, that’s not how you use a sword. Lads, you’ve been poking him for five minutes and he’s still talking. Lads.

THIS is the sort of hijinks that make me love the show, warts and all:

Annie confronts Guy about leaving their baby “to die”, there’s another argy-bargy, and Baby Seth and Annie are sent off into the sunset with money and a toy miniature bow and quiver.

Because we need it shoved down our throats that Blobbin would be a good parent.

(Guy would have been an excellent parent, *akchually*. A bit overbearing probably, but devoted.)

THE END

(Next episode, Guy goes flirting)

[thedeaddrawsblog]

Okay can we talk about something for a moment???

(Warning: Spoilers for the new Thundermans movie)

The Thundermans have a LOT of things they introduced into the series but never touched in again.

…

So I made a list of things I want them to revive or at least expand on-

- Billy and Nora (or even Chloe) getting their thunder sense. They only mentioned it in season 1 episode 13, and literally never talked about it again (from what I remember.) I want to see them expand on, use it in battle, and more importantly, I want to know if it’s just a Thunderman trait or if other heroes have that trait. Do villains have that trait? After all, they did reveal in the movie that superheroes and villains get their powers from a plant.

- speaking of the plant, is there multiple plants? Why was the thunderman family chose to keep it safe? How many generations ago did people get powers? Why those people? What created the plant?

- also I’m just saying it now, I need Max and Phoebe to hang out with Billy and Nora. Like we barely see them interacting. I’d literally do ANYTHING for an episode of Max and Nora hanging out, Phoebe and Billy hanging out, vise versa… I know there was like one episode in the series, but that’s only one and Max was being a dick.

- I NEED to see an episode of what it would be like if Max did take over the world. Like how he did it. Did he become a superhero to get a bunch of secrets and feed them to Dark Mayhem? Or maybe it’s just an alternative au when Phoebe failed to turn him, and said the original uncut scene instead, where she asked him if he’d rather be a hero or a villain. Obviously we wouldn’t be able to see them as teens, but maybe they could explain it in the beginning. Like maybe Colosso is telling a story. Like clue style.

- OH. SPEAKING OF CLUE, maybe a murder mystery episode??? I think that would be awesome. Kinda like the blue bean episode where max turned blue. But like. ✨murder✨

- So… I can’t be the only one that wants at least a little queer rep, right…? And I’m not the only one who thinks Max is a little… fruity… (as long as Jack Griffo is okay with it) give him a boyfriend or something PLEASE 😭

- Because Max and Phoebe are I think like… 25…. I’d like to see them attempt being adults. Key word: attempt. (basically I just to see them get an apartment and what not, and obviously the Thundermans are sad, and their siblings find it hard not having their older siblings in the house.

- And I think maybe even Chloe not knowing much about cousin Blobbin, their pop-pop, or grandma (I forgot what they called her) would be interesting as well.

- also what happened to Blobbin???

- anyway

- I’m just kinda writing stuff out

- I think they were already thinking about expanding on it, but since several of the Thundermans friends +Wong have powers, I’d like to see how they deal with keeping it a secret or if they somehow get the powers removed. Like maybe they use that ball thing they used to trap Dark Mayhems powers. OH. WHAT IF THEY ACCIDENTALLY GAVE THEM MAYHEMS POWERS IN THE PROCESS OF TRYING TO TAKE THEIR POWERS?!

- Okay this kinda goes into Phoebe and Max becoming adults, but I wanna know if they went to college or if they are going to college.

- also, Max talks about having Evilgram in one episode (maybe a couple), and I’m curious if he kinda just forgot about it or deleted it. He probably deleted it, but I think it would be cool seeing Max find Evilgram on his old phone and miss that phase of his life. Maybe that could even tie in with an evil Max episode.

- ALSO I WANT TO SEE MAX USING HIS GADGETS IN BATTLE. HE SPENT SO MUCH TIME MAKING THEM IT’S UNFAIR IF HE CANT USE THEM.

I’m probably missing a lot of small moments but honestly I’m just going back and rewatching some of the episodes and I’ve been kinda jumping around so i do t remember all of them-

Anyhow I think it’s awesome that the Thundermans are coming back to life (that is if the movie gets good reviews. PLEASE LIE AND SAY IT WAS GOOD EVEN THOUGH THE CGI WAS CRAP. THE PLOT WAS ACTUALLY GOOD.)

[cryptosexologist]

way #1000000 to de-sexualized momo bnha’s powers n costume: since she can control her lipids, she could just move fat as needed into her arms for creating stuff. all the exposed skin necessary is for her forearms to be uncovered. it’d even result in some wierd body horror which would be badass as heck

[finncomet]

Your hat is stupid.

TRY TO MAKE MY MUSE ANGRY.

☄️ "What the bjork did you just flipping say about me, you little tranch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Banana Guard Academy, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Wizard City, and I have over 300 confirmed moitles.

I am trained in heroic warfare and I’m the top swordfighter in all of Ooo. You are nothing to me but just another dillweed. I will wipe you the donk out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my globbin words.

You think you can get away with saying that snozz to me over the Internet? Think again, ding dong. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of Banana Guards across Ooo and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re blee-blobbin dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can moitle you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands.

Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Candy Kingdom and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable buns off the face of the continent, you little poo brain. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your glob danged tongue.

But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price,you grob grobbin dumb hole. I will boom boom fury all over you and you will drown in it.

You’re bjorkin dead, kiddo." 🦋

[the-captains-mop]

He's lost inside || Max Thunderman

Part 1

Max hasn't been able to sleep since prom night. The family notices that his powers aren't working as they should. He gets a well needed hug.

--------------------------------------------------

Max was exhausted, he sat down at the island and dropped his head onto his folded arms. He hasn't had much sleep since prom night. He can't seem to forget all the horrible things he's done. How could he? He could still hear the shake in his mothers voice. He heard his father voice echoing in his head while trying to sleep. 

 "Max, are you feeling okay?" Barb asked walking into the kitchen. 

"He probably stayed up all night," his father cut in before he could even speak.

Max shrugged and decided it would be easier to say that Hank was right. No questions asked. "Yeah, I was on my phone all night," He lied, picking his head up. 

His mom cocked her head to the side, "Max, I know your lying. I found your phone shattered on the bathroom counter last night." 

Max forgot. 

He was exhausted and was at his witts end trying to help himself sleep nightmare free. He had hoped a warm bath would do the trick. When it hit 2 hours of laying in bed staring at the ceiling, he stormed to the bathroom and launched his phone at the wall. He didn't care that his phone was shattered. He set it on the counter, used the restroom and went back to tinker on one of his many projects.  

Max sighed, "Mom, I'm fine, okay? I just... haven't been able to sleep." He said using his powers to bring himself a banana. It completely missed his hand and hit him in the face. 

Phoebe laughed, "Yeah, your perfectly fine." 

Max huffed picking up the banana and stared at it. He had hoped the 2 hours of sleep he got would have fixed his powers, he was dead wrong. Now his family knows there is something wrong with him. 

"Mom, is Max okay?" Billy asked pulling his attention from the banana.

Max knew he had to lie, they didn't really want to know; Not after what he did to them. 

Max stood up and decided to put his back pack on, "I'm fine, just... a little tired." He said. 

He started for the door with Nora tagging behind him. He reached for his broken phone not using his powers and he accidentally triggered his telekinesis and the phone went flying and hitting Nora.

Max sighed, he knew he wasn't going to be able to go to school like this, they were going to force him to stay home. He put his hand down and dropped his head forward. He jumped when a hand rested on his forehead. 

Phoebe stood there, eyebrows furrowed in concentration. "You don't have a temperature. How long have your powers been acting up?" She asked. 

He glanced over and saw his entire family standing in the living room watching. "Almost 2 months, usually easier to control..." he admitted. Her hand moved to his cheek and Max let his eyes close and leaned into her hand. 

She let out a quiet gasp, but said nothing else. Max was grateful. He had needed his big sister to comfort him like when they were kids, but how could he have turned to her after what he did to his family. How he after he declared war on his big sister. 

"Nora, Billy, I'll take you to school," Hank announced realizing that the Max situation was more serious than he thought.

"I'm going to go make a call to cousin Blobbin," Barb said, stepping into the kitchen.

Max forced himself to move away from his sister and sit on the couch with his head in his hands. Phoebe gave Nora and Billy hugs on their way out. When the door closed phoebe walked over to Max, "Do you want to do a scan to figure out whats wrong?" She asked gently brushing his hair to the side. 

He sighed and got up, and moved to the thunder tv. Barb walked back in on the phone as the TV scanned his entire body. 

"Extreme exhaustion, doctor visit recommended." The TV said lowering its self back down. 

Max looked at his sisters and his mom who all seemed so confused. Phoebe walked over and pulled him into a hug. Chloe held waist tight her head buried in his side. 

"Oh, Honey." His mother whispered walking over and kissing his head. 

The hug and kiss opened up the flood gates and he sobbed into his sisters shoulder. He didn't deserve this. He stole their powers, declared them dead to him and left them for Dark Mayhem. He couldn't forgive himself and here they were holding him.

Max held Phoebe tighter and let everything out muttering apologies to the three of them. They held him tight. 

Taglist: @almightygrasshopper

Taglist Open!

[tsfennec]

I posted 1,104 times in 2022

63 posts created (6%)

1,041 posts reblogged (94%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@freenarnian

@scarvenartist

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I tagged 1,103 of my posts in 2022

#nature - 334 posts

#love it - 276 posts

#beautiful - 257 posts

#photography - 235 posts

#art - 228 posts

#animals - 217 posts

#writing - 214 posts

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#writers - 212 posts

#lolol - 184 posts

Longest Tag: 115 characters

#(and anti-snobbery snobbery of its own kind! snobbery about not liking things recognized as quality literature etc)

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Leetle forest mouse trying to get out of the rain :)

This was meant to be a quick doodle but I ended up having too much fun trying to figure out how to do a decent background, lol.

124 notes - Posted January 13, 2022

#4

I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living! Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!

Psalm 27:13-14 (ESV)

157 notes - Posted September 12, 2022

#3

Just got a new iPad, so I finally have Procreate! And as my also-new ring splints are helping with hand pain... behold, my first finished piece in over a year! \o/

I had so much fun playing around with the watercolor and inking options for this. :D

189 notes - Posted January 10, 2022

#2

Despite my name, I had... never actually drawn a fennec fox before? But now I have rectified that oversight. :D

250 notes - Posted March 31, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Okay, yeah, I'm just gonna go ahead and post Blobman and Blobbin.

Aka combatting perfectionism on more complicated projects with a quick Batman because it's something I haven't tried before.

1,676 notes - Posted April 27, 2022

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[blackfemmecharacterdependency]

Share a Lair 16 || Thunderstruck Birthday Girl

This is basically just self indulgent Charlotte love showering. I generally write Charlotte as an April Taurus, because of when her birthday episode aired, so I figured this is around the time that I can just do a little cute, fun, show of love and stuff, and also give her a chance to get some nice things. It is mostly just filler, but does have at least one important piece of story and I’ll get back to the crucial parts with the next installment.

Charlotte liked a lowkey birthday. Usually, she had brunch and cake with her parents and spent it with the guys in the evening. This year, Max made a bunch of plans for her, and she was curious to see how well he would do with this, so she planned to have brunch with her parents and told the guys that she would touch base with them later in the night. At some point during making plans, the boys got competitive via casual conversation and so she was told that they were going to have a bake off and that as the birthday girl, she would be able to determine who baked the best cake. “So, you’re gonna have like four cakes?” Max asked.

“Knowing the guys, not a single one of the cakes that they plan on making will make it, whether due to calamity or them just eating all of the cake.” But, if there was cake, she was definitely having some of each.

After brunch, Max picked her up from the bistro, not really being that concerned that she wasn’t introducing him to her parents yet. He got a glimpse of them hugging her before leaving and they seemed extremely intimidating. He already didn’t like parents and hers were both successful in their own right and high maintenance from what he understood. Even the bistro that they were at was an exclusive place. Each guest had a personal server, and whenever the Pages came through, their Jamaican chef was given access to the kitchen to prepare their meals for special occasions. This morning, Charlotte had been presented with an authentic Jamaican breakfast and bottomless brunch drinks. Max couldn’t recall ever having had a brunch, much less one in an exclusive bistro, with a personal chef, personal server, and access to all of the bar.

Superhero life paid extremely well, but it was more of a trade off, since one’s body and health was on the line with each mission. Charlotte’s father was a physicist and spent more time working than he did at home. Her mother was a college chancellor and was home just as much as her husband, even though her job was only about an hour away. They tried to make up for the blank spaces with extravagant gifts and expensive celebrations, but Charlotte was simply always happy just to be able to see both of them at once for a little bit of time, even though half of it was generally spent with her having to update them on exactly how her educational career was going and have enough accolades and credentials to account for the time she couldn’t tell them about as a hero’s tech specialist. Learning that made Max understand her overachiever complex a little bit better, but he wanted the rest of her birthday to be as relaxing and rewarding as possible.

He took the scenic route back to the lair and she leaned her seat back and rested, watching everything and listening to a playlist that he made for her. He had several. One for when she goes to sleep, one for her workday, one for when she studied, etc. This one was one that he made for car trips with her. One of his favorite things about doing stuff for her was that she always noticed. The first time he’d made her a playlist, she’d said, “You had to have made this thing specifically for me, right?” He wanted to deny it, but noticed how excited that made her and confessed. It was an amazing feeling to do something for someone special and have them not only not take it for granted, but to really appreciate it. Max didn’t always receive that from his loved ones, but he usually did from Charlotte. He was confident that she was going to LOVE her birthday time with him.

She liked being around a lot of people less than he did. So, where he might be down for a party with his friends and loved ones, she was more like her family was over here for this amount of time, and her friends over there, for that amount of time. Everything and everybody had their time and place.

But, she told him not too long ago, “I never get tired of being around you though. It’s like… you’re practically a part of me.” She said it all casually, matter of factly. He couldn’t even hear her emotion in it, but he definitely started crying. Then there was this whole thing where she thought that maybe she said the wrong thing and tried to comfort him and apologize and explain better, “I’m not saying that you aren’t your own person or anything, just that like… my life is comfortable no matter how much of you is in it…” He had to compose himself to let her know that he was happy to hear it, not upset. He also apologized for crying, because damn… that couldn’t be sexy. Turns out, it was… as long as it’s warranted and not over every little thing! So, that was bonus scores for him.

.

Max made Henry “be scarce” from the lair for today, which was fine by him, because he had to “Serve these fools in the cakes department, anyway!” And Max just… Didn’t even WANT to know what that meant, but was relieved to later find out that it was about baking cakes and not the booty shaking contest that his brain automatically convinced him it would be. So, whenever Charlotte walked in and the place was set up like a spa, she gasped. “What’s happening?”

“You always want to grab a spa day, but you’ve cancelled like a dozen times because of work demands. So, I set up a home spa day for you… I did get funding from Dr. Page and Dr. Page, but they knew that you deserved it and since Henry asked, they just wired it to your birthday fund.”

“You and Henry got money from my parents for a birthday spa day for me?”

“I sent Henry to get money, yes. Is that alright?”

She covered her face, “That is SO SWEET! They could have eaten him alive. They’re very inquisitive people.”

“I sent him with an outline of all of the plans,” he said, with a shrug.

“You know me so well that you know how my parents are, even though I haven’t introduced you yet!” She was thunderstruck. He took her bags and handed her a robe and slippers…

After her spa treatment day, complete with Max playing guitar and singing her some songs during interludes while she waited for something to dry or settle, or whatever, she felt brand new. She hadn’t realized how stressed she’d been, even though Max does stuff for her whenever he can, she obviously had still been hella stressed out - probably because of Russia, graduation, Jasper and Henry, spa days being cancelled… But, she NEEDED this and Max giving her what she needed, right on time? She would miss that when he was gone. Now, she was sad for a moment.

“Time for gift presentation!” He said, distracting her from missing him before he was gone. She perked up, skin radiant, silky smooth curls popping, and her smile beaming. She was still in her robe and had her spa day swag bag next to her, which were packages of the products used today in her spa day treatment and also products from the spa that supplied the materials. “First of all, we have…” he spun his finger around and the kitchen island rotated to reveal where he had hidden all of her gifts, apparently (and she had forgotten that this lair had many secret areas, but he obviously hadn’t). He reached for a huge bag and beckoned it to her. “From the Hart household, warmth and comfort in the form of new silk sheets and pillowcases, plus fuzzy blankets and bamboo pillows!”

“YES!” She had been saying she needed these forever, but not getting around to ordering any because other stuff seemed more important everything she thought about it. She LIVED for luxury, though, she often talked herself out of it.

“From Henry, himself, an assortment of fine chocolates, a wine drinking accessories set, and a collection of gourmet cheeses.”

“Ooooh… He must’ve gone into his hero funds for this!” She said, pulling things out of Henry’s gift bag.

“He did!” Max cheered. “Jasper got you…” He gave her the bucket, wrapped kind of like an Easter basket, “A stationary pail.” There was something weird in his voice. He probably had asked Jasper to get something else and Jasper was having none of it.

She opened it to see a personal planner, a personalized pen and journal set, scented stickers, sticky pads, etc and she squealed. “He got them to match the scheme of my home office whenever I set up my new place after college!” Max furrowed his eyebrows and she explained, “You see, Max… You are very smart and pay attention to detail, but Jasper has known me for a really long time and sometimes has even the most menial of my lifestyle choices down pat.”

“Your work dads got you tickets to the Graduation Concert Festival,” he said, handing her an envelope and ignoring the declaration about Jasper. “My parents got you a kitchen set for your post graduation apartment… Well… actually, my Cousin Blobbin did, but it was my mom’s idea. Cookware and appliances!”

“That’s… nice!” She said. She had just realized that she hadn’t gotten anything for that, yet. Just an electric kettle, a spice rack, and whatever she was going to cop from her parents’ kitchen. This was a much better situation! She had a few more pretty great gifts that she appreciated, then they were down to the last few, which were all from Max. He sat down next to her and she set aside everything that she had and let him hold both of her hands, wondering why it got so serious all of a sudden.

“Charlotte… The past months that I’ve known you have been amazing to me. Even before we got together, just looking forward to experiencing and learning you everyday has been everything that I’ve ever wanted from another person. : Hesighed and looked at their hands, “I’m officially scheduled to go to Russia for three years.” His shoulders sank. “And I know that you plan to visit and that we plan to continue long distance, but that’s still so tentative for me and scary - the thought of you being tasked with waiting on me to come back. But…” He looked over at the counter and floated something to himself, “If you want, you can stay in my comeback home.” He handed her a set of keys with a SuperMax keychain attached to it. “I know that you’ve been looking for apartments and this is actually a house, but…”

“You are asking me to move in with you for 3 years from now?” She asked.

“No! I’m asking you to move in now and get comfortable and make it your own, then whenever I’m back… we can get used to living together again, and you’ll already be set.” Her eyes widened, “But, if you don’t want to, I understand! We haven’t even been together for a year and who knows how Russia will change us.” He pressed a button on the remote on her keys and a holographic image of the house projected from it, “But, if you want to, I’m welcoming you to.” It was an elevated house on top of pillars, a garden with stair rails on either side and a carport. “And you’ll have full access to my underground lab and lair.”

“This is a super cute house,” she said, in a tiny voice. “And a very sweet notion. I’ll… think about it…” Sensibly, she and Max had not been together long enough for this move, but also, their circumstances were special. They lived together already, basically, and their timeline was rushed for a number of reasons… But, just living with him alone, and actually moving in and keeping it while he was on tour was… a lot that she had to rationally comb through. He understood, and was grateful that she didn’t flat out say no and tell him that he was crazy for thinking she’d even want to.

“On a lighter note!” He changed the subject, “I present to you, some of my most inspired works of art…” He gave her a portfolio of several portraits that he had done of her, some very casual and cool, some extremely detailed and graphic, some as herself, some reimagined in other forms and styles. “They’re mostly from the pining days,” he said, bashfully. “But, I’m working on a big piece to hang in the comeback house.” She flipped through pages of her face, beautifully rendered and covered her heart.

“These are really good, Max.”

“I usually just draw project schematics and costumes, but I was having a phase where every time I tried, I had to draw you first, or I’d be distracted the whole time.

“I love it.”

“I figured that I did need to get you a REAL gift, though, so…” He reached for a jewelry box and opened it. It looked elegant, like fine jewelry - a set with a necklace, earrings, bracelet and a ring. “Shapeshifting jewelry!”

“I’m sorry, what kind?”

He put the ring onto his pinky, because it would not fit anywhere else and it lit up, then it reformed itself, unbuilding and then rebuilding to look like a skull and crossbones ring. She gasped. “It scans your body and gets a record of your outfit and accommodates it. Very fun technology to have.” He took it off and handed it back. She put it on her ring finger and once again, it reformed and became a cute, thin band with a tiny pink jewel.

“This is amazing! I’ve never seen it before.”

“Experimental tech being used for facial imagery reconstruction whenever supers get unmasked. I took the principles and put them in your jewelry!” He said, proud of himself. She was proud, too. She honestly had THEE BEST BOYFRIEND. “And, in case you felt like that was a little too much, or whatever, I have backup gifts of a simpler nature. There’s this coupon book of treats and services, yes several of them are sexual, because I made it and I can,” (she laughed) “There is this HUGE concentration candle, I mean… LOOK at this thing! Oh, and this.” He handed her some folded paper. “It’s a handwritten love letter, basically me being kind of a loser and telling you all of my feelings, but on paper, like a madman…”

“Yes,” she said, snatching it.

“Yes, I’m a madman?”

“No… Well… yes, but… yes, I’ll move into your comeback home after college graduation.” She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him.

“To clarify… Was it the letter?”

“It was the… Max. You’re perfect, Dude. I just…” she shrugged and rested her head on him.

.

Whenever Charlotte made her way to the Man Cave, she heard the hijinks as soon as she stepped off of the elevator, and what she saw was four grown men and a young girl all fussing and covered in cake. “Did any of you save any cake?” She called from the elevator. They didn’t stop fussing or even seem to hear or notice her, so she looked around and saw a plate wrapped in saran wrap with assorted slices of cake, “I’m gonna presume that this is mine and leave with it if nobody notices that I’m here!” she called out. They were still fussing at each other and then Ray slapped Jasper in the face with a glob of icing, to which, Jasper growled and charged him and Schwoz, Henry and Piper, began to try to break it up, but all that could be seen was cake and icing flying everywhere. Charlotte left and whenever she did, she heard as the elevator door was closing, “Did any of you hear Charlotte’s voice?”

“Nice try, Henry! You don’t get away from this that easily!” Piper screamed.

“I honestly don’t want to know,” Charlotte told herself. But, she honestly did, too.

Shortly before Midnight, whenever she came back, everything was cleaned up and she announced, “Bringing back the plate!”

“SURPRISE!” Everyone jumped out and screamed, making her scream and drop the plate which shattered on the floor.

They ignored it and began to sing the happy birthday song to her, gathered around a cake platter that Schwoz was holding, only it had an amorphous cake on it, and could hardly hold the candles. It looked like a disaster from a cartoon. She blew out the candles and looked at them, suspiciously, “So, is this the only cake? What happened to the bake off?”

“Bake off?” Ray repeated. “We don’t have to prove that any of us are any better than the others. Besides, it’s YOUR birthday! Today was about you.”

“Did you all fight the entire time, have a huge cake fight, then gather up which pieces of cake that you could and cover it in icing to present as my birthday cake?” Everyone’s face showed that they were caught! That was EXACTLY what had happened. But Ray scoffed and said, “No! And quite frankly Charlotte, it is insulting that you would accuse us of such…”

“I saw you earlier. I took that plate of cake,” she pointed to the broken plate on the floor.

Henry began to fuss about how HE KNEW he’d heard her voice earlier, while Ray was fussing about the broken plate and Jasper was asking which cake was the best. Upon hearing that question, they all became more interested in that, “Yeah, which one? Which? Huh? Bet it was mine…”

“Ummm… they were all actually delicious, but I preferred the lemon one…”

“YES!” Jasper cheered and began to gloat in everybody’s face. “Max liked the chocolate one that tasted like a 5 year old just threw all their favorite things into a cake.”

“I TOLD ALL OF YOU THAT I AM THE CAKE COMMANDO!” Ray yelled. She figured that was his, because it was just a bunch of different chocolate things in a cake - chocolate cookie crumbles, chocolate chips, chocolate candy - she felt sick after one bite of that.

“Yeah, well, he’s probably gonna order one for his dad’s birthday.”

“Thunder Man? He’s still alive?” Ray asked.

Piper asked, “So… you didn’t like the pineapple right side up cake?”

“I did.”

“The chocolate covered strawberry cake was a delicious masterpiece!” Henry fussed.

“It was.”

Schwoz offered, “I think that you may have misjudged the dreamsicle and pickle cake.”

“I did not misjudge it, because I didn’t know what it was and refused to try it. Max said that he didn’t know how it worked, but it somehow did.”

SHe held out her hands, “I enjoyed everybody’s cake…” She pointed at Schwoz,’ “Except for yours.”

“Awwww,” he said, crestfallen.

“But, Jasper asked which one I thought was best and…”

“And she said it without much of a thought that she preferred the lemon icebox layered sponge cake with whipped white chocolate cream cheese icing. TOLD. YOU. GUYS!” He fist bumped her and she just laughed a little bit.

Henry commented, “I got beat with an egg beater for nothing.

“Not for nothing!” Charlotte said. “I completely want that chocolate covered strawberries cake programmed into the auto snacker for my next monthly.”

“My dreamsicle and pickle cake was the only one that used organic ingredients,” Schwoz pouted.

“I will NEVER try it. You won’t EVER tell me anything to make me try a Dreamsicle and pickle cake, Schwoz!” Charlotte said.

Jasper said, “Well… I’m gonna have some of this birthday cake,” and grabbed a plate and the cake cutter.

“Cut me a piece, too!” Henry asked. They all sat down and had a plate with fallen pieces of their various cakes on it and turned on a movie to watch.

“This was actually my best birthday in a while,” Charlotte noted. She didn’t need to go into detail about Max and how perfect he was. Her friends were all happy and full of cake and even that, in it’s own way, was equally as perfect.

[neshabeingchildish]

Thunderstruck Birthday Girl

This is basically just self indulgent Charlotte love showering. I generally write Charlotte as an April Taurus, because of when her birthday episode aired, so I figured this is around the time that I can just do a little cute, fun, show of love and stuff, and also give her a chance to get some nice things. It is mostly just filler, but does have at least one important piece of story and I’ll get back to the crucial parts with the next installment. Tagging, so I don’t get fussed at lol @kiddangers @adorkable-blackgirl @chenoahchantel @famousflowermagazine I THINK that’s it? Sorry if there was someone else.

Share-a-Lair 16

Charlotte liked a lowkey birthday. Usually, she had brunch and cake with her parents and spent it with the guys in the evening. This year, Max made a bunch of plans for her, and she was curious to see how well he would do with this, so she planned to have brunch with her parents and told the guys that she would touch base with them later in the night. At some point during making plans, the boys got competitive via casual conversation and so she was told that they were going to have a bake off and that as the birthday girl, she would be able to determine who baked the best cake. “So, you’re gonna have like four cakes?” Max asked.

“Knowing the guys, not a single one of the cakes that they plan on making will make it, whether due to calamity or them just eating all of the cake.” But, if there was cake, she was definitely having some of each. 

After brunch, Max picked her up from the bistro, not really being that concerned that she wasn’t introducing him to her parents yet. He got a glimpse of them hugging her before leaving and they seemed extremely intimidating. He already didn’t like parents and hers were both successful in their own right and high maintenance from what he understood. Even the bistro that they were at was an exclusive place. Each guest had a personal server, and whenever the Pages came through, their Jamaican chef was given access to the kitchen to prepare their meals for special occasions. This morning, Charlotte had been presented with an authentic Jamaican breakfast and bottomless brunch drinks. Max couldn’t recall ever having had a brunch, much less one in an exclusive bistro, with a personal chef, personal server, and access to all of the bar. 

Superhero life paid extremely well, but it was more of a trade off, since one’s body and health was on the line with each mission. Charlotte’s father was a physicist and spent more time working than he did at home. Her mother was a college chancellor and was home just as much as her husband, even though her job was only about an hour away. They tried to make up for the blank spaces with extravagant gifts and expensive celebrations, but Charlotte was simply always happy just to be able to see both of them at once for a little bit of time, even though half of it was generally spent with her having to update them on exactly how her educational career was going and have enough accolades and credentials to account for the time she couldn’t tell them about as a hero’s tech specialist. Learning that made Max understand her overachiever complex a little bit better, but he wanted the rest of her birthday to be as relaxing and rewarding as possible.

He took the scenic route back to the lair and she leaned her seat back and rested, watching everything and listening to a playlist that he made for her. He had several. One for when she goes to sleep, one for her workday, one for when she studied, etc. This one was one that he made for car trips with her. One of his favorite things about doing stuff for her was that she always noticed. The first time he’d made her a playlist, she’d said, “You had to have made this thing specifically for me, right?” He wanted to deny it, but noticed how excited that made her and confessed. It was an amazing feeling to do something for someone special and have them not only not take it for granted, but to really appreciate it. Max didn’t always receive that from his loved ones, but he usually did from Charlotte. He was confident that she was going to LOVE her birthday time with him.

She liked being around a lot of people less than he did. So, where he might be down for a party with his friends and loved ones, she was more like her family was over here for this amount of time, and her friends over there, for that amount of time. Everything and everybody had their time and place. 

But, she told him not too long ago, “I never get tired of being around you though. It’s like… you’re practically a part of me.” She said it all casually, matter of factly. He couldn’t even hear her emotion in it, but he definitely started crying. Then there was this whole thing where she thought that maybe she said the wrong thing and tried to comfort him and apologize and explain better, “I’m not saying that you aren’t your own person or anything, just that like… my life is comfortable no matter how much of you is in it…” He had to compose himself to let her know that he was happy to hear it, not upset. He also apologized for crying, because damn… that couldn’t be sexy. Turns out, it was… as long as it’s warranted and not over every little thing! So, that was bonus scores for him.

.

Max made Henry “be scarce” from the lair for today, which was fine by him, because he had to “Serve these fools in the cakes department, anyway!” And Max just… Didn’t even WANT to know what that meant, but was relieved to later find out that it was about baking cakes and not the booty shaking contest that his brain automatically convinced him it would be. So, whenever Charlotte walked in and the place was set up like a spa, she gasped. “What’s happening?”

“You always want to grab a spa day, but you’ve cancelled like a dozen times because of work demands. So, I set up a home spa day for you… I did get funding from Dr. Page and Dr. Page, but they knew that you deserved it and since Henry asked, they just wired it to your birthday fund.”

“You and Henry got money from my parents for a birthday spa day for me?”

“I sent Henry to get money, yes. Is that alright?”

She covered her face, “That is SO SWEET! They could have eaten him alive. They’re very inquisitive people.”

“I sent him with an outline of all of the plans,” he said, with a shrug.

“You know me so well that you know how my parents are, even though I haven’t introduced you yet!” She was thunderstruck. He took her bags and handed her a robe and slippers…

After her spa treatment day, complete with Max playing guitar and singing her some songs during interludes while she waited for something to dry or settle, or whatever, she felt brand new. She hadn’t realized how stressed she’d been, even though Max does stuff for her whenever he can, she obviously had still been hella stressed out - probably because of Russia, graduation, Jasper and Henry, spa days being cancelled… But, she NEEDED this and Max giving her what she needed, right on time? She would miss that when he was gone. Now, she was sad for a moment.

“Time for gift presentation!” He said, distracting her from missing him before he was gone. She perked up, skin radiant, silky smooth curls popping, and her smile beaming. She was still in her robe and had her spa day swag bag next to her, which were packages of the products used today in her spa day treatment and also products from the spa that supplied the materials. “First of all, we have…” he spun his finger around and the kitchen island rotated to reveal where he had hidden all of her gifts, apparently (and she had forgotten that this lair had many secret areas, but he obviously hadn’t). He reached for a huge bag and beckoned it to her. “From the Hart household, warmth and comfort in the form of new silk sheets and pillowcases, plus fuzzy blankets and bamboo pillows!” 

“YES!” She had been saying she needed these forever, but not getting around to ordering any because other stuff seemed more important everything she thought about it. She LIVED for luxury, though, she often talked herself out of it. 

“From Henry, himself, an assortment of fine chocolates, a wine drinking accessories set, and a collection of gourmet cheeses.”

“Ooooh… He must’ve gone into his hero funds for this!” She said, pulling things out of Henry’s gift bag.

“He did!” Max cheered. “Jasper got you…” He gave her the bucket, wrapped kind of like an Easter basket, “A stationary pail.” There was something weird in his voice. He probably had asked Jasper to get something else and Jasper was having none of it. 

She opened it to see a personal planner, a personalized pen and journal set, scented stickers, sticky pads, etc and she squealed. “He got them to match the scheme of my home office whenever I set up my new place after college!” Max furrowed his eyebrows and she explained, “You see, Max… You are very smart and pay attention to detail, but Jasper has known me for a really long time and sometimes has even the most menial of my lifestyle choices down pat.”

“Your work dads got you tickets to the Graduation Concert Festival,” he said, handing her an envelope and ignoring the declaration about Jasper. “My parents got you a kitchen set for your post graduation apartment… Well… actually, my Cousin Blobbin did, but it was my mom’s idea. Cookware and appliances!” 

“That’s… nice!” She said. She had just realized that she hadn’t gotten anything for that, yet. Just an electric kettle, a spice rack, and whatever she was going to cop from her parents’ kitchen. This was a much better situation! She had a few more pretty great gifts that she appreciated, then they were down to the last few, which were all from Max. He sat down next to her and she set aside everything that she had and let him hold both of her hands, wondering why it got so serious all of a sudden.

“Charlotte… The past months that I’ve known you have been amazing to me. Even before we got together, just looking forward to experiencing and learning you everyday has been everything that I’ve ever wanted from another person. : Hesighed and looked at their hands, “I’m officially scheduled to go to Russia for three years.” His shoulders sank. “And I know that you plan to visit and that we plan to continue long distance, but that’s still so tentative for me and scary - the thought of you being tasked with waiting on me to come back. But…” He looked over at the counter and floated something to himself, “If you want, you can stay in my comeback home.” He handed her a set of keys with a SuperMax keychain attached to it. “I know that you’ve been looking for apartments and this is actually a house, but…”

“You are asking me to move in with you for 3 years from now?” She asked.

“No! I’m asking you to move in now and get comfortable and make it your own, then whenever I’m back… we can get used to living together again, and you’ll already be set.” Her eyes widened, “But, if you don’t want to, I understand! We haven’t even been together for a year and who knows how Russia will change us.” He pressed a button on the remote on her keys and a holographic image of the house projected from it, “But, if you want to, I’m welcoming you to.” It was an elevated house on top of pillars, a garden with stair rails on either side and a carport. “And you’ll have full access to my underground lab and lair.” 

“This is a super cute house,” she said, in a tiny voice. “And a very sweet notion. I’ll… think about it…” Sensibly, she and Max had not been together long enough for this move, but also, their circumstances were special. They lived together already, basically, and their timeline was rushed for a number of reasons… But, just living with him alone, and actually moving in and keeping it while he was on tour was… a lot that she had to rationally comb through. He understood, and was grateful that she didn’t flat out say no and tell him that he was crazy for thinking she’d even want to.

“On a lighter note!” He changed the subject, “I present to you, some of my most inspired works of art…” He gave her a portfolio of several portraits that he had done of her, some very casual and cool, some extremely detailed and graphic, some as herself, some reimagined in other forms and styles. “They’re mostly from the pining days,” he said, bashfully. “But, I’m working on a big piece to hang in the comeback house.” She flipped through pages of her face, beautifully rendered and covered her heart.

“These are really good, Max.”

“I usually just draw project schematics and costumes, but I was having a phase where every time I tried, I had to draw you first, or I’d be distracted the whole time.

“I love it.”

“I figured that I did need to get you a REAL gift, though, so…” He reached for a jewelry box and opened it. It looked elegant, like fine jewelry - a set with a necklace, earrings, bracelet and a ring. “Shapeshifting jewelry!” 

“I’m sorry, what kind?”

He put the ring onto his pinky, because it would not fit anywhere else and it lit up, then it reformed itself, unbuilding and then rebuilding to look like a skull and crossbones ring. She gasped. “It scans your body and gets a record of your outfit and accommodates it. Very fun technology to have.” He took it off and handed it back. She put it on her ring finger and once again, it reformed and became a cute, thin band with a tiny pink jewel. 

“This is amazing! I’ve never seen it before.”

“Experimental tech being used for facial imagery reconstruction whenever supers get unmasked. I took the principles and put them in your jewelry!” He said, proud of himself. She was proud, too. She honestly had THEE BEST BOYFRIEND. “And, in case you felt like that was a little too much, or whatever, I have backup gifts of a simpler nature. There’s this coupon book of treats and services, yes several of them are sexual, because I made it and I can,” (she laughed) “There is this HUGE concentration candle, I mean… LOOK at this thing! Oh, and this.” He handed her some folded paper. “It’s a handwritten love letter, basically me being kind of a loser and telling you all of my feelings, but on paper, like a madman…” 

“Yes,” she said, snatching it.

“Yes, I’m a madman?”

“No… Well… yes, but… yes, I’ll move into your comeback home after college graduation.” She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him. 

“To clarify… Was it the letter?”

“It was the... Max. You’re perfect, Dude. I just…” she shrugged and rested her head on him. 

.

Whenever Charlotte made her way to the Man Cave, she heard the hijinks as soon as she stepped off of the elevator, and what she saw was four grown men and a young girl all fussing and covered in cake. “Did any of you save any cake?” She called from the elevator. They didn’t stop fussing or even seem to hear or notice her, so she looked around and saw a plate wrapped in saran wrap with assorted slices of cake, “I’m gonna presume that this is mine and leave with it if nobody notices that I’m here!” she called out. They were still fussing at each other and then Ray slapped Jasper in the face with a glob of icing, to which, Jasper growled and charged him and Schwoz, Henry and Piper, began to try to break it up, but all that could be seen was cake and icing flying everywhere. Charlotte left and whenever she did, she heard as the elevator door was closing, “Did any of you hear Charlotte’s voice?”

“Nice try, Henry! You don’t get away from this that easily!” Piper screamed. 

“I honestly don’t want to know,” Charlotte told herself. But, she honestly did, too.

Shortly before Midnight, whenever she came back, everything was cleaned up and she announced, “Bringing back the plate!” 

“SURPRISE!” Everyone jumped out and screamed, making her scream and drop the plate which shattered on the floor. 

They ignored it and began to sing the happy birthday song to her, gathered around a cake platter that Schwoz was holding, only it had an amorphous cake on it, and could hardly hold the candles. It looked like a disaster from a cartoon. She blew out the candles and looked at them, suspiciously, “So, is this the only cake? What happened to the bake off?”

“Bake off?” Ray repeated. “We don’t have to prove that any of us are any better than the others. Besides, it’s YOUR birthday! Today was about you.”

“Did you all fight the entire time, have a huge cake fight, then gather up which pieces of cake that you could and cover it in icing to present as my birthday cake?” Everyone’s face showed that they were caught! That was EXACTLY what had happened. But Ray scoffed and said, “No! And quite frankly Charlotte, it is insulting that you would accuse us of such…”

“I saw you earlier. I took that plate of cake,” she pointed to the broken plate on the floor.

Henry began to fuss about how HE KNEW he’d heard her voice earlier, while Ray was fussing about the broken plate and Jasper was asking which cake was the best. Upon hearing that question, they all became more interested in that, “Yeah, which one? Which? Huh? Bet it was mine…” 

“Ummm… they were all actually delicious, but I preferred the lemon one…”

“YES!” Jasper cheered and began to gloat in everybody’s face. “Max liked the chocolate one that tasted like a 5 year old just threw all their favorite things into a cake.”

“I TOLD ALL OF YOU THAT I AM THE CAKE COMMANDO!” Ray yelled. She figured that was his, because it was just a bunch of different chocolate things in a cake - chocolate cookie crumbles, chocolate chips, chocolate candy - she felt sick after one bite of that.

“Yeah, well, he’s probably gonna order one for his dad’s birthday.”

“Thunder Man? He’s still alive?” Ray asked. 

Piper asked, “So… you didn’t like the pineapple right side up cake?”

“I did.”

“The chocolate covered strawberry cake was a delicious masterpiece!” Henry fussed.

“It was.”

Schwoz offered, “I think that you may have misjudged the dreamsicle and pickle cake.”

“I did not misjudge it, because I didn’t know what it was and refused to try it. Max said that he didn’t know how it worked, but it somehow did.”

SHe held out her hands, “I enjoyed everybody’s cake…” She pointed at Schwoz,’ “Except for yours.”

“Awwww,” he said, crestfallen.

“But, Jasper asked which one I thought was best and…”

“And she said it without much of a thought that she preferred the lemon icebox layered sponge cake with whipped white chocolate cream cheese icing. TOLD. YOU. GUYS!” He fist bumped her and she just laughed a little bit.

Henry commented, “I got beat with an egg beater for nothing.

“Not for nothing!” Charlotte said. “I completely want that chocolate covered strawberries cake programmed into the auto snacker for my next monthly.” 

“My dreamsicle and pickle cake was the only one that used organic ingredients,” Schwoz pouted.

“I will NEVER try it. You won’t EVER tell me anything to make me try a Dreamsicle and pickle cake, Schwoz!” Charlotte said. 

Jasper said, “Well… I’m gonna have some of this birthday cake,” and grabbed a plate and the cake cutter. 

“Cut me a piece, too!” Henry asked. They all sat down and had a plate with fallen pieces of their various cakes on it and turned on a movie to watch. 

“This was actually my best birthday in a while,” Charlotte noted. She didn’t need to go into detail about Max and how perfect he was. Her friends were all happy and full of cake and even that, in it’s own way, was equally as perfect.

[thatdisneychannelchick]

The Thundermans S04E06 Date of Emergency>

So, Max has a girlfriend, Oyster has a girlfriend, Gideon briefly had a pseudo-girlfriend despite the fact that he really shouldn’t be allowed around anyone of the opposite sex until he’s had so extensive therapy, but does anyone ever think of Wolfgang? If Phoebe was really so fucking desperate not to feel like a fifth wheel, why didn’t she just go to the Heart Tree with Wolfgang? Sure, 90% of the words that come out of his face hole are just his own name, but I’d hedge my bets on him not having a clue about the legends surrounding the Heart Tree and not having the capacity to understand them if someone told him. Wolfgang is so much more endearing than the mental clusterfuck that is Gideon. Why in Hades did Phoebe think Gideon was an even remotely okay choice? Anyone who’s willing to “settle” for that…thing…needs to get their head checked

On another note, what do you think a trillion-dollar bill would look like? I know that Blobbin is a sodmething idiot - that’s just common knowledge - but this just baffles me. What the fuck did he plan to do with it? It’s not like any store would actually except it. There’s a couple of reasons for that: 1. No one is actually going to believe it to be authentic and 2. We all know that the first thing Blobbin tries to buy with that thing will be something like an ice cream sundae. No store has enough money to make change for that shit. Most corporations don’t have enough money to make change for that. At some point, Blobbin will have no choice but to put that money back in the bank.

Sodmething idiot.

[just-another-thundermans-blog]

All Alone - Chapter 2 Part II

Beginning - Previous

-0-

He watched mutely, as the pallbearers began carrying each and every member of his family. It was a closed-casket kind of thing so none of the (nosy) mourners got to see the state that each Thunderman was in. He heard some displeased whispers before the ceremony even began but he was just so damn exhausted that he ignored them. 

Those sorts of people were the absolute worst and he already feels bad enough without causing a public scene for the tabloids to have a field day about. He knew there were some photographers and journalists in the (quite huge) crowd (it was one of the reasons why he wanted to have a small, private, funeral but his family was practically celebrities around here so he really had no choice in the matter-) and there was absolutely no need for him to feed them headlines for their next big scoop.

Disgusting.

He marched behind the pallbearers dead-eyed and watched them carefully weave through the twists and turns of the streets. He had wanted to participate in bearing the caskets but considering that five people had died, he felt that it wouldn't have been fair of him to help carry one of the caskets and not all.

When they reached the cemetery, it felt like time itself started slowing down. Things began to get clearer and it was as though reality came crashing down on him because (suddenly-) the grief became that much more palpable and holding back tears started to feel more and more difficult.

Max's chest ached with loss and grief as he watched the people lower down the five caskets 6 feet into the ground. It felt like the universe was hammering in the fact that his family was not coming back. He blinked rapidly as tears streaked their way down his pale cheeks and took a shaky breath. He wanted to look away, he really did, but he felt like he owed it to his family that he sees this through to the end. 

He wouldn't be a coward now. Not when it truly counts.

-0-

People giving you their condolences after the burial of a loved one (or multiple loved ones in this case) felt… awkward.

At this point, he wanted nothing more than to disappear off the face of Earth. He didn't want anything to do with those people (especially since so many have come-) and it showed in the way he stared at every single one of them through hollow eyes. It felt painfully awkward for all those involved but, soon enough, it was over. 

Many people rushed out of the cemetery as the sky darkened ominously and the clouds started packing together. The day had been sunny so far, and the weather forecast declared it a perfectly sunny day, so no one had the foresight to bring along an umbrella and they'd all rather not get wet.

Max didn't care much about that. He simply stood, rooted to his spot, in front of the five graves and stared at them with the intensity of someone who wanted nothing more for them than to disappear. He felt something spark in his chest, but he wasn't sure what it was (nor did he want to know).

Thunder blared loudly, its sound bouncing off the graves in the cemetery. At this point, there was almost no one in the vicinity to hear nature's warning. Only the dead and the boy who was as good as dead.

Eventually, some point after the rain started pouring, Max heard the footsteps of someone approaching. They were light (so obviously; not Blobbin-) and measured in a way that made him know that whoever was approaching him wanted him to know that they were coming. 

Eventually, the footsteps slowed to a stop (next to him). Max felt his curiosity rise (unbidden) from the depths of his body but didn't make a single move to satisfy it. 

"Hello, Max." The mystery person spoke.

Max's eyes widened slightly. That voice…

"President Kickbutt." He stated quietly; sneaking a glance at her from the corner of his eyes. 

The woman simply inclined her head in his direction, not taking her eyes off of the graves.

Max blinked emotionlessly (not really, but he was too damn tired to even think about it-) and turned his gaze towards his family's final resting place, "What brings you here?" He asked quietly.

The woman gave a mirthless puff of laughter, not paying any mind to the rain drenching her, "I never left." She drawled out; enunciating every syllable.

Max felt his brows furrow in confusion, "You didn't…? Why?" He asked, perplexed.

He didn't see the action, but he was about 70% sure that Kickbutt shrugged her shoulders.

"I wanted to talk to you," The President of the Hero League replied easily.

Max pursed his lips as a stab of irrational irritation traveled through his body. He shoved his soaking hands into his equally wet pockets and fully faced her. 

The Superheroine was dressed in a simple black skirt and a formal suit jacket. Her coat, which stopped at her knees just a few inches below her skirt, was also black. And thick. Way too thick for July.

She, for all intents and purposes, looked like she was going to attend a business meeting rather than go to a funeral. He mentally shrugged his shoulders and decided that it didn't matter.

"You wanted to talk to me?" Max snapped in disbelief; a sneer curling on his lip.

"Yes," The woman replied evenly, "I wanted to talk to you." She turned her gaze to him.

Max barked out a humorless laugh and covered his eyes, "Okay…" He bit his lip slightly and nodded to himself, "Okay," He smirked, though his eyes were devoid of joy, and tilted his head, "Let me do you a better one." His smile dropped and he took a step closer to the unflinching woman.

"Why here?" He hissed angrily, "Why now?" He felt his hands, which he had ripped out of his pockets a while ago, curl into fists. He wasn't even sure why he was this irritated. This… angry.

President Kickbutt tilted her head lightly to the side, as she regarded him with something akin to wariness, "This is the only place that you and I can visit at the same time," She replied calmly, "Also, I only have an hour of free time remaining today before I have to go back to my duties and, even then, I probably won't catch a break in a very long time."

Max clenched his jaw and tried his best to calm down. He knew he was being irrational, he knew he shouldn't direct his anger at her, he knew. That didn't stop him from being angry though. 

"Fine," He finally gritted out, "Let us talk. What did you want to say?" He took a few steps back and promptly focused his gaze on the set of five graves that lay in front of him.

President Kickbutt remained silent, and Max felt his irritation spike again. She wanted to talk, didn't she? Why wasn't she talking then?

"I wanted to discuss your options for the future," The woman finally spoke; carefully dragging out her syllables, "And inform you of… a few things about the incident."

Max clenched his eyes briefly as his nostrils flared. Five minutes. Can't he go for five minutes without someone reminding him that he was basically both alone and homeless? That he had no one left for him? That he had nothing?

President Kickbutt, taking his lack of response for what it was, continued, "Blobbin offered you a space with him, didn't he?"

Max frowned despondently, "Yes." He mumbled, his voice barely heard above the rain.

"And did you reply?" Kickbutt asked curiously.

Max pursed his lips, "No. Not yet." He muttered, scuffing his shoe lightly on the muddy ground. 

Kickbutt hummed, "Okay. Are you going to accept?" 

Max shrugged non-committedly, "Maybe, maybe not." 

Kickbutt remained silent.

For a moment, the only sound in the cemetery was the sound of rain hitting the ground and the graves rhythmically. For a moment, Max closed his eyes and imagined a scenario where none of this happened. For a moment, everything was okay. Even if it wasn't.

"...You do realize that you don't have many options beyond that, right?" Kickbutt breathed out, her voice barely reaching Max.

Jarred out of the tantalizing fantasy his mind composed, Max sighed heavily, "Yes. I know."

Kickbutt went silent again.

Max felt a small smile creep on his face as he remembered Dr. Colosso's nickname for the President ('Villains don't respect heroes Maxie!') but, just as quickly as the smile appeared, it fell off his face. Dr. Colosso...

"Hey…" Max gasped out, panic clawing viciously on his guts, and whipped his head towards the (surprised) superheroine, "Dr. Colosso! What happened to him?"

President Kickbutt pursed her lips and turned away from him and that alone was answer enough.

Max felt a fresh wave of grief and loss move through his body and tried to brace himself against the onslaught. Even Colosso hadn't been safe from the attack. Colosso… Colosso was a villain. 

Max clenched his eyes shut as his emotions warred in his chest. The grief that had dulled somewhat in the last few minutes (President Kickbutt unknowingly served as a distraction) returned with a vicious vengeance. His best friend… How did he not think to ask about his one and only friend? 

Colosso- Colosso was the one person who had been there for him through thick and thin. When he was being bullied by the other supe-kids (as his dad had dubbed them.) in school, Colosso was the one to give him advice about dealing with them. When he declared his desire to become a supervillain, Colosso was the only one to not laugh at him. When he first started out as an inventor, Colosso was the first to congratulate him on his inventions (and even gave Max pointers on how to improve them!).

The 15-year-old pressed a shaking hand to his mouth. He had not asked after his (only) friend- he had not searched for his (only) friend- he forgot about his only friend.

Hot tears contrasted heavily with the cold rain as they mixed together on Max's face. Guilt, sadness, grief, horror, loss all swirled around in his being. How could he- how could he-

"Max," He felt someone lay a hand on his shoulder. Max opened his eyes, but did not move his gaze from the ground, nor did he move his hand.

"I wanted to inform you earlier about… the 'doctor's' status," The lady grumbled; her tone turning a bit strange as she pronounced the word 'doctor', "I'm sorry you had to know now, but there was no helping it. Not with the league's condition."

Max nodded slightly and attempted to swallow around the sudden lump that formed in his throat.

"We buried him in the villain cemetery, in case you wanted to know." She said awkwardly.

Max nodded once more as a pang went through his chest. He didn't even attend Colosso's funeral. His best friend must be rolling in his grave by now.

Max carefully removed his hand from his mouth and took a deep, shaky, breath, "Is there… is there anything else that I- That I need to- to know?" He stuttered slightly; his voice cracking in multiple places.

Unfortunately, Kickbutt nodded. The woman was starting to look more and more uncomfortable and it was obvious that whatever news she had left wouldn't be good, "We have evidence that suggests that Dark Mayhem was involved."

Max felt his eyes widen. His grief forgotten for a moment, he turned towards the superheroine, "W-what?" 

The lady looked at him with pity, but Max was too shocked to even feel angry about it, "He- They left a letter. We found it in your room in the basement."

Max felt all blood drain from his face as a violent sense of vertigo threatened to make him keel over. He did stumble, but Kickbutt wasn't a superheroine for nothing. 

"A- A letter?" Max mumbled numbly, "They left a letter?" He rasped in disbelief.

President Kickbutt looked at him with concern, but nodded nonetheless, "Yes. We already read it to make sure it didn't have any… dangerous content, and," The woman paused for a moment and took a deep breath, "It strongly suggested that Dark Mayhem was the one to command the attack on your house."

It was truly a testament to Max's strength that he didn't keel over right then and there. As it is, his head was spinning and it was only Kickbutt's hand gripping his arm that kept him from kissing the muddy ground.

As it is, the 15-year-old blinked heavily and attempted to fight off the dizziness that threatened to steal his senses, "Can I," He began hesitantly as Kickbutt slowly released his arm, "Can I have that letter?" He asked, voice wavering slightly.

The woman considered for a moment... before she nodded, "I don't see why not," She replied honestly, "I'll see to it."

Max nodded slowly, "Thanks." He said with relative sincerity even though his voice sounded as hollow as he felt.

President Kickbutt patted his shoulder. 

No other words were exchanged between them after that.

-0-

Next

[just-another-thundermans-blog]

All Alone - Chapter 2 Part I

Beginning - Previous

[A/N: This chapter deals with the aftermath of Chapter 1 and so, it will be more heavy than its predecessor! I hope you like it!]

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TRIGGER WARNING: CHARACTER DEATH AND SUBSEQUENT FUNERAL, SHOCK, ANXIETY ATTACK, AND MENTAL BREAKDOWNS! IF ALL OF THIS TRIGGERS YOU THEN DON'T READ!

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The Hero League didn't take long to arrive. 15 minutes had barely passed since he had called them but, soon enough, the door was being broken down and heroes were swarming into the house like ants on a piece of candy.

Max didn't react to any of that, far too lost in grief and shock to respond to anything. He was sure that President Kickbutt was trying to talk to him, but he couldn't discern anything she was saying from the buzz of static in his ears. 

He wasn't sure what was actually happening outside of his consciousness. His hands felt clammy but that's about all he can currently, consciously, feel. His mind was suddenly having trouble processing everything and anything, and he felt like he was floating on some unknown planet. 

Images of his family kept replaying in his mind like a twisted version of one of those stupid PowerPoint Presentations that the teachers in Hiddenville (Metroburg uses holograms) use. The images kept flashing between past and present. Phoebe laughing with Cherry, Phoebe dead on the floor of her room, Mom and Dad joking and teasing each other, Mom and Dad dead in the living room, Billy and Nora running around the house playing, Billy and Nora broken and bleeding behind Phoebe.

He wasn't sure what he was even feeling anymore. Sometimes the fog clears up and he feels vestiges of something- something that hurts and burns and leaves him breathless with its intensity, but most of the time it's simply nothing but a blurred perception of everything and flashing images of his loved ones. 

He wasn't sure where he even was anymore. At times, he gets moments of clarity where he's in a bare room with nothing but white everywhere (why is it all white though? It was dark in his house and the walls weren't that white so where was he-), but soon enough they all blend back into the blur of static and confusion that he unwittingly found himself in. 

He just felt so heavy and so weightless at the same time, and his head felt like it was full of cotton wool. Then as suddenly as that sensation developed, he abruptly felt his surroundings sharpen and his sense of perception clear up. It was as though a switch had been flipped, and it was so disorienting, he felt like his very soul was being jarred from its place. 

Feeling his heart rate increasing as his breathing got faster and faster, Max took quick stock of his surroundings. Heart monitor, I.V. drip, soft white sheets, and an overbearing smell of antiseptic- oh shoot he was in a hospital room (which explained all the whiteness). 

Suddenly, doctors and nurses swarmed into the room, increasing his anxiety and making him panic even more. He was in a hospital- he couldn't be in a hospital- what about their secret, it'll all be revealed and his parents would be so mad and disappointed-

His chest burned with the lack of oxygen and he felt his heart hammering in his chest. He tried to take deep, even, breaths (just like Dr. Colosso always said-) and calm down enough to think the situation through. It didn't work. Panic had already consumed him in its powerful dark grip, and his throat was beginning to feel clogged and he couldn't breathe properly-

A sensation of cool calmness invaded his frenzied senses and calmed his frazzled nerves as he felt his eyes droop in sudden exhaustion. Soon after, his vision went black and all thoughts of the material world fled his head.

-0-

President Kickbutt was not having a good week. Between the endless mountains of paperwork and Max's call, the Hero League was at an all-time worst. There wasn't a hero in Metroburg that hasn't heard of the Thunderman tragedy and most were shocked, frightened even, that such a prominent superhero family was so easily killed. 

Hank Thunderman was known for his abnormal strength and his ability to conquer even the toughest of opponents (as his fight with the Green Ghoul 20 years prior proved-) and his death had brought about a sudden instability that hadn't been in the hero community since before his debut as a hero. 

His son, Max, was another can of worms entirely. Ever since he was in Middle School, the boy wanted nothing more than to be a supervillain. He kept telling everyone and anyone that would listen to him that he's going to be the 'greatest supervillain' and surpass even Dark Mayhem. He always punctuated his statements with outrageous pranks and remarks and (according to his teachers) he was an absolute terror with abysmal marks. From what she had seen though, Max Thunderman was nothing if not confident and witty, and when she found him at what remained of the Thunderman home in Hiddenville, she was shaken to her core.

He looked so lost, and he wouldn't respond to anyone or anything. He just kept staring into thin air with glazed over eyes and ragged breathing, looking for all the world like someone who had died on the inside. Remembering the look in his eyes, as he was carted away by the Metroburg ambulance team, made her cringe and shudder every time. Poor boy didn't deserve what was happening to him.

A week had passed since the incident and yet Max wasn't showing any sign of recovery. Blobbin had already requested that the boy be transferred into his care immediately but she wanted to give Max a chance to choose his new guardian. She wouldn't take his right to choose, he had lost too much already and (by the look of things) Blobbin agreed. 

It was all a big mess and Kickbutt was in the process of drinking some afternoon coffee (trying to unwind a bit-) when the Metroburg City Hospital called. Apparently, Max had responded to something but-

"We had to sedate him," Said the Doctor over the phone.

"What?" Kickbutt gritted out as she rubbed the bridge of her nose. Gosh, the kid just woke up why-

"He was showing signs of an Anxiety Attack," The doctor, whose name she can't remember for the life of her, responded, "It could've set back his recovery, and we had to act quickly."

Kickbutt exhaled through her nostrils and set down the phone for a moment. This was all such a royal mess, wasn't it?

"President Kickbutt?" A hesitant voice sounded from the speaker of her phone.

Kickbutt felt her eye twitch as she bit her lip in frustration. Yup, it was a huge mess.

-0-

When Max came to, almost 12 hours later, the first thing he noticed was the stark white ceiling. Strange, that wasn't how his ceiling looked. He blinked again as his memories started to trickle in slowly. He was in… a hospital. He closed his eyes a bit in frustration. Why was he in a hospital- where was his family? Just- what happened???

A soft knock sounded on the door. Max just had the time to incline his head towards it when a nurse invited herself in. She looked… plain, to say the least. Her brown hair, dark eyes, and peachy complexion did not make her stand out much.

The lady was holding something in her hand, something sharp and pointy- oh God that was a syringe-. He took a sharp intake of breath and fought the urge to scream. He felt his body tense involuntarily and, apparently, he inhaled too loudly because the nurse suddenly noticed him. 

"Oh! You're awake!" She crowed and immediately started buzzing a strange button by his bed. 

Max didn't reply though, too focused on the object in her hand to really consider talking. She turned to him, brandishing the syringe in her hand (the urge to scream strengthened), and smiled sweetly, "The doctor will be here shortly." She said and then raised the syringe. 

Max eyed the thing with slight fear, but as the nurse stabbed the I.V. drip next to his bed with it, he felt the tension bleed from his shoulders and relief settle in his bones. Thank Goodness that thing wasn't being stabbed into his arm instead!

His thought process was interrupted when three polite knocks sounded on the door. This time, a man with salt and pepper hair and a rather friendly face invited himself into the room. He smiled serenely at Max as the boy pushed himself upright. The 15-year-old staunchly ignored the slight (almost unnoticeable) weakness in his arms, and began to wonder just how long was he asleep for? 

"Good evening, Max. I'm Doctor Kevin," The doctor said as he adjusted the file in his hands, "How are you feeling today?" He asked with a friendly smile.

Max blinked at the harmless question (that the doctor was probably hoping would put him at ease) and licked his chapped lips. He tried to talk but his throat protested the action vehemently. Wincing, he pointed at his throat and hoped that the doctor would get the memo.

The doctor (now known as Dr. Kevin) nodded sheepishly and turned to the plain nurse, "Please, pour him a cup of water."

The nurse nodded (looking more dignified than she had when she barged into the room) and proceeded to fiddle with a closed bottle of water that had been sitting on the table next to him. Max blinked and turned back to the doctor.

Doctor Kevin smiled evenly, "I'm sure you have a lot of questions right now," He said kindly as the nurse handed Max the cup of water. The 15-year-old nodded a bit absently as he stared at the paper cup in his hand.p

The doctor nodded patiently and pointed at him with a pen that he got from… somewhere, "We'll answer them all in due time, but for now, you should probably drink some water."

Max nodded, still not entirely there, and took a slow sip before he gulped the whole thing down. Gosh, he didn't know he was so thirsty until now. He nodded at the nurse gratefully and handed her the paper cup.

Looking at the doctor, Max tilted his head, "What-" He paused, cleared his throat (his voice sounded so scratchy-), and then tried again, "What happened? Why am I here?" He, despite his best efforts, rasped out.

The doctor looked at him critically for a few moments, "You truly don't remember, do you?"

Max wrinkled his nose in frustration, "Remember what? The last thing I remember was being stuck in detention," -and feeling an acute sense of danger.

"...I see," Murmured the doctor looking suddenly uncomfortable.

"You didn't answer me though," Max deadpanned, fisting his sheets, "What happened- why am I here- I- Where's my family?" 

The doctor ceased all action before he gently closed the file. He peered at Max through sad eyes full of pity, and Max found himself growing angry. He hated pity.

"Don't just stand there!" Max snarled, "Tell me what's wrong- what happened?! Where is everyone?!" He could feel his breathing elevate as his anxiety skyrocketed all of a sudden. He had a feeling he won't like the answer.

The doctor looked at him with a strange look, "Max," The man said slowly, "I need you to calm down."

"Calm down?!" Max laughed a bit hysterically, hating the way his voice cracked, "How do you want me to calm down when you won't tell me what the hell is going on?!?" He wasn't shouting- not quite at least.

The doctor looked the epitome of calmness as he cautiously approached his bedside, "I understand," He replied evenly, "I just need you to calm down before you launch yourself into an anxiety attack."

"But-"

"Calm down, breathe evenly," The doctor paused, looking like he was considering his options, "And I'll tell you everything. Does that sound good?"

Max glared at the man but jerkily nodded as he averted his gaze to his fisted hands. He tried his best to even out his breathing through the breathing exercises that Colosso had taught him. It was a lot of work, but he managed a semi-calm state.

The doctor, who at some point pulled up a chair to his bedside, studied him critically, "Are you feeling better?"

Max bit his lip at the surge of irrational anger that flooded his veins and sighed in frustration, "Less angry, I guess," He mumbled out, his brows furrowed slightly.

"Good," The doctor nodded, "Now, I need you to focus with me because what I'm about to say isn't going to be easy to hear."

Max looked at him as slight anxiety prickled at his chest, "Something bad happened." He stated anxiously.

The doctor pursed his lips, "Unfortunately, yes."

"And I can't remember...?"

"Not at the moment, no."

Max clenched his eyes briefly and fought the urge to yell again, "Why?" He gritted out instead, fisting the sheets of his hospital bed.

The doctor barely reacted to his tone, "I can only assume it's a defense mechanism that your brain activated," The man said, his tone even, "It is not unheard of for victims of trauma to block out unpleasant memories, especially if said memories cause them grief."

Max licked his lips as slow, venomous, panic clawed at his very heart, "What-" He swallowed and cleared his throat as his voice broke slightly, "What… what happened?" He asked hesitantly.

Doctor Kevin looked at him with a pained expression, "Brace yourself," He said quietly. 

Just then, with that one little statement, all of Max's alarm bells blared to life. 

"Are you ready?" The man inquired gently, and Max could literally feel his heart plummet.

The truth is, he really didn't want to hear this because- what could have possibly been so traumatic and horrifying that his brain had to block it out as a defense mechanism? 

(he already had a few ideas but none that he particularly wanted to entertain.)

Max closed his eyes and worried his lip. He really needed to know, but he didn't want to. 

Coming to a decision, Max nodded jerkily and braced himself mentally (preparing for the worst.)

"Today is Thursday, June 16th, 2015" The doctor started heavily; carefully avoiding Max's confused gaze, "About a week ago, the Thunderman house in Hiddenville received an attack by a villain not yet identified,"

Max felt his eyes widen as memories began to trickle in. Mom, Dad, Phoebe, Billy, and Nora- all- all-

"The unknown villain has succeeded in…" The doctor paused to collect his words, noticing the slowly growing look of horrified realization on Max's face, "assassinating," The man tactfully ignored the choked noise that escaped Max's lips, "almost the entire family. Only one person remains now, and.." Here, the doctor hesitated.

Max, who had gone so pale his complexion almost matched the hospital sheets, carefully looked at the doctor, "And what?" He murmured hoarsely, barely keeping it together.

"You're the only person that survived the attack, Max. I'm so sorry."

Max didn't respond after that. He felt a familiar sting behind his eyes and the stupid lump in his throat that could only be the result of incoming tears. He tried to rub his eyes to ward off the stupid burning sensation behind his retinas though judging by slight wetness he felt on his cheeks, he wasn't quite successful.

The doctor gently patted his shoulder and stood up, "I'm so sorry for your loss," The man stated quite sadly, "I'll give you a moment alone." And with that, the man left the room.

It was only when he was truly, finally, alone that Max allowed his sobs to escape him in the form of heartwrenching wails of anguish and sorrow.

-0-

It feels surreal, Max thought idly not really paying attention to his surroundings. He was dressed in all black and while that normally wouldn't have made a difference, it seemed especially prominent on the day of his family's funeral.

A lot of.. people actually came. He had known that his family was prominent (his father was one of the most celebrated superheroes in the country for God's sake-) but it still felt… unnatural.

Many people had come to him before the beginning of the service to wish him condolences. Some were sympathetic, others looked like they didn't particularly care as long as they made themselves look good.

Personally, he just wanted to be done with it and just go… somewhere (Blobbin was hovering nearby maybe he'd actually take him up on his offer-). The whole thing felt out of place.

The ceremony itself passed in a blur and he didn't pay attention (too lost in his own dark thoughts and grief) until it was time for his eulogy. He hadn't come with a pre-prepared speech like most of the others did, so he had to come up with something on the fly. 

He wasn't known for his quick wit for nothing, though. Quickly and in less than 5 minutes, Max successfully composed a 25-minute eulogy celebrating the lives of Hank, Barb, Phoebe, Billy, and Nora Thunderman. He told stories of the family chilling under the sun and basking in the summer heat on the many picnics they used to hold. He told the mourners of the achievements of each and every one of them, he celebrated his kin for the little things that made them, well, them, and he made sure that every member of his late family would be remembered for who they were and not what they were thought to be. 

By the end of his speech, he was left feeling exhausted and raw. He hated crying in public and, considering who had just died and his state of affairs, he shed quite a few tears, but (he kept reminding himself over and over) this was for Mom and Dad and Phoebe and Billy and Nora. They deserved this and he would give nothing less. 

Even if he felt disconnected from himself. Even if it hurt him and his heart felt like it was being ripped to little pieces. It didn't matter. It was for them.

Everything was for them.

-0-

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