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re : how each brother reacts learning that they can't go back
you'll have to pry the "all the Brozone Bros knew what happened at the tree" headcanon outta my cold, dead dead dead hands.
#sandflakedrew#trolls clay#trolls john dory#trolls floyd#trolls bruce#on today's docket : brozone angst#added in order of who i think found out first to last#listen#listen listen listen#they Knew!!!#JD for obvious reasons#Clay from Viva#Bruce isn't taken aback hearing Viva's story either. He's heard before#the combo of Floyd's 'never thought i'd see any of my brothers ever again' & 'is it really you?' hits a similar note for me#They! Knew!#clears throat. anyways#me to me : okay but wouldn't it be a little bit /more/ fucked up if JD didn't /let/ himself be fully gray? wouldn't that be worse?#the idea of someone forcefully sucking that shit back in?#terrible.#awful.#perfect for JD#perfect perfect perfect one might even say#same kinda deal with bruce.#what if you heard the news and felt compelled to try and live for more people than yourself. in order for your current peace to be fair#what then#i have more thoughts but this is enough tags as is#trolls#dreamworks trolls
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Whumpee who goes in a slightly different direction mentally than 'caretaker is new master. New master won't give rules. Means punishment is around every corner, landmine of unsaid rules.'
It initially go through that phase, but quickly realize caretaker isn't punishing it for following whumper's old rules. Which obviously means they want it to continue following those rules.
So it does. It keeps calling them sir, keeps it's eyes down, doesn't eat without asking. Clearly caretaker wants this, and what they want is all that matters, right? If they didn't want whumpee to continue, they would have made that painfully obvious.
Just, a whumpee who is so sure of its ability to follow the rules, the habit. It's easier to follow the rules it knows than to find out they were lying, or testing it by telling it that its free.
#Whump prompt#PyrePrompts#Whump#conditioned whumpee#Edit: everytime this shows up in my notes and I reread it#It feels like I'm showing my ass that I don't understand the trope that I'm talking about#But I was so sure I was cooking something when I wrote it#There was probably a specific dynamic in mind I flattened for the prompt#Probably Kevin asylum au aftermath?#Like the fact he's back with Julian/Brazen but he never asked to come back#And his attitude of 'just let other people do what they want. My feelings and wants don't matter#Anything I want will just be dangled and then taken away it's better to just not want anything.'#Julian says there's no rules but there's always rules. So might as well follow the asylum's rules here until he's corrected#And from Julian's pov- hey at least Kevin's taking care of himself. Eating and bathing and maybe listening?#Well he's not interrupting. And he's answering questions- sometimes. That's gotta be like. Progress right?#The problem is he's not doing any of that out of wanting to live or anything out of life#He just doesn't want the overt punishment#He's tired of enduring it. Of trying to hold good things in his hands like filling a strainer with water.#If he just keeps his effort in not doing anything that warrants the straitjacket than it's all he can hope for.#And idk if any of that came through in the original text I posted.
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Sometimes I truly wish Livejournal was still a thing like it used to be. I miss going on there, scouring for the those nice icons (and then replacing them with even nicer icons two hours later), and changing the 'Listening to:' 52 times while writing my entry for the day. I miss them. I miss the earlier internet things of a decade/(+) ago.
#[ out of character. ] don't bend or water it down. don't try to make it logical. rather: follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.#[ i've salted about this before-- what social media and having 'an audience' has caused for people. ]#[ and i mean it that i wish we could bring the importance of privacy back. ]#[ ... listen. livejournal came up in conversation and i'm a sentimental individual. ]#[ also on that note lemme share positivity: i love the greeks. they're so brutally honest and unintentional comedians. ]#[ and very nice. also-- i'm about to do my part as a hopeful new greek citizen (hey i got my tax number; i can claim this surely). ]#[ which is feed the stray cats that're on the other side of the street of the hotel. stray cats here seem to live the life. ]#[ their tummies seem full. and their coats look quite nice. what is this. ]#[ thank you athenians (sorry people of piraeus-- i don't mean to insinuate you're athenian but also... ]#[ you're as athenian as people from saint addresse were/are havrais). ]#[ you deserve more good things in life than many. ]#[ but yes. i have food that mara despises (i don't know why; she wants to live the tuna life) and so i thought... you know what. ]#[ let's give the cats the food/kibble. ]
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yk in retrospect it really is no surprise that rgg has a lot of queer fans. outside of the games being utterly homosexual of course
#snap chats#sorry i finally finished reading the second volume of yakuza's bias#GREAT manga i cant recommend it enough im already crying waiting for the third one to be translated#i got a stroke when the manga mentioned.. those like. ai-chat character things#like christ i know this is a new series and the japanese version was released in january but my GOD this is still topical#anyway let me. get to my point LMAO#because while i was reading there was a speech given by My Main Man that ive noticed is. p common in yakuza media#yk a speech about how the only people who'll give them (yakuza) worth is themselves#and that they'll forever be casted out by society so their passion is the only thing to turn to and live for. something like that#and of COURSE i remember a similar sentiment from The Clan Heir Is A Trans Woman#and listen..... organized crime is very different from being queer. im pretty sure dont quote me on that--#HOWEVER when you have messages like that being thrown left and right... yeah its no wonder LMAO#of course its not note-for-note and the contexts are VERY different LMAO but yk what i mean#its like that one post talking abut monsters and monsterfucking being queer or something#dont listen to me i only go here on legality but i think im onto something#ok bye im gonna stare at my ceiling until i pass out. i wanna start working on my dummy comic but alas...#too busy with comms this week... AND im sleepy...
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Photon Maiden's selection album, 4 Un Voyage, finally released!! Let's go!!!
Here are the songs in order:
FriendShip
4 Challenges (ver. 2023)
We Never Stop (ver. 2023)
Hikari (ver. 2024)
Akatsuki (fruits mix ver. 2024)
OVERCOME (ver. 2023)
Linked Ring (ver. 2023)
Collector
24 (ver. 2024)
Into the storm (ver. 2024)
Be with the world (ver. 2023)
Photon Melodies (ver. 2023)
Begin Again
Platinum (Saki Solo cover)
Dear My Friend (Ibuki Solo cover)
Fansa (Towa Solo Cover)
Let The Show Begin (Noa Solo cover)
Your Love âĄ
Happy Happy Friend (Cutopia cover)
Kawaikute Gomen (Cutopia cover)
Photon Melodies (TAKU INOUE Remix ver. 2025)
#crow talks#d4dj#d4dj groovy mix#photon maiden#AHHHHHHH IVE BEEN WAITING FOR SO LONG!!!! <333#the reason why i found out this album was released was bc i saw sato hina make a story abt it on her ig lol-- (ty sato hinaaaaa)#now i can hear the full version of all of their solos let's gooo!!!#also cutopia's stuff!!! THEY ALL HAVE FULL VERSIONS!!! YESSSSSS#also crazy to me they remixed the taku inoue remix for photon melodies this year..... just for this album.... damn#as im writing this im still in the first few songs so i wont be able to say my thoughts on all of the covers#you might see me post abt them later tho.... especially let the show begin and dear my friend#ahhhhhhhh i forgot how much i love photon maiden's sound <3 SATO HINA U ARE AMAZING!!! her harmonies and... idk how to explain but--#her voice during instrumentals where she just belts notes and just!!! IS AWESOME?! yeah i love it so much!! i never get tired of her singin#haru-chan is also so good!! ive been listening to more harmoe so ive been getting more and more used to her voice and seeing how cute it is#OH AND haru-chan's voice for the more âseriousâ photon songs scratch my brain a lot..... ahhhh i should go listen to harmoe after this#tsumugi risa is awesome too.!! i still think it's crazy she can have that voice for saki then switch to chu2 and akikaze rui lol#tsumugi risa's voice in collector makes me rlly giddy lol (makes sense since the song already does that w the synths and stuff)#AND!!! dont get me started on nanaki kanon...... i love the tone she gives to ibuki's voice... it makes her parts more richer and nice to--#listen to! it's really apparent in akatsuki (fruits mix and og) and linked ring! i already love both songs a lot so her voice just boots it#her voice kinda sends an arrow through my heart and such ahhhh i actually love her voice so much SHES AMAZING!!!#*meteor isnt here but i LOVE how she sings 'is the tempo slow? i dont care at all' SO MUCH IYAAAAAA!!!!!#i think nanaki kanon's voice just adds a whole new flavor to photon that i never knew i needed..... she's so amazing guys pleaseeee--#i should check out the stageplays and see how she does w koharu in revstar...... ive seen the first stageplay so i just need to watch more#ALSO IM ON INTO THE STORM AS I TYPE-- THE 2ND RAPPING PART WAS IBUKI!?!!?!? OK DAMN..... i love the power she puts into her voice AHHHHHHH#okay enough fanboying over photon maiden.... it's making me look like theyre my faves..... i wanna see all the units live one day istg--#LISTEN TO THE ALBUM!! stop reading me fanboy over it and LISTEN!!!!#edit: * i put the wrong song lol ALSO BEGIN AGAIN IS JUST SATO HINA PROPAGANDAA AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
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when i submit maintenance to you, i promise im not doing it because i think youâre soooo pretty when you look at my pipe system.
#speck rambles#and maybe???? let me edit my maintaince requests?????#like?? maybe i found out something new?? or it just got fixed by itself???? so i need to be able to edit it???#listen. office. big guy (gender neutral) i know youâre tired of me#i know youâre tired of being like. âis this (deadname)?â and hearing my tired ass voice go âhellooooâ#youâre tired. IM TIRED. doNT get sassy with me#âit says here in the notes-â WELL IM LIVING WITH IT#i had to submit a request 5 times for you to look at my dryer#and iâll do it again if it gets broken!!!#my. tank. is. over. filling!!!!#I. CALLED. MY. DAD. TO. LOOK. AT. IT.#IF YOU WONT LET ME FIX IT MYSELF. IM GOING TO BE ANNOYING UNTIL YOU FIX IT FOR ME!!#IM TIRED OF HEARING IT!!!!#I HAVE TO MANUALLY TURN ON AND OFF THE WATER DOG!!!#âit says here-â WELL COME OVER AND ILL TELL YA WHAT THEY MISSED!!!#ITS /SUBMERGED/. IT SHOULDNT EVEN BE ABLE TO DO THAT!!!#no shame to them. God. no shame to them. but iâm not doing this because i want to be a problem to you#iâm doing this because unless iâm annoying. itâs not going to get fixed. and i want to keep my apartment well maintained#vent post#sorta. all the real vent is in the tags#imma blow this up with my mind#anyyywayss
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how to bring up to your dungeon master that your character might be better if she got railed
#when you're also the person in the group who's usually least interested in doing a sex scene#listen i'm not saying sex will fix everything#but my formerly-oath-of-devotion paladin who has lived in a constant miasma of anxiety and is a highly pressurized bottle of emotions#is finally letting herself make (frankly bad) choices and letting her rage out and went oathbreaker and is trying to enter her bad bitch er#this is the ariadne who fucks and she should get to fuck one time đ#i keep thinking about this guy back in the city where her order's main temple is#who took over the thieves' guild because the temple wasn't helping the city and he was taking matters into his own hands#and god he's been stuck in her craw because like#you're saying the thing i've devoted my life to is shit#and i'm not sure you're wrong but i can't say that#and i hate that#and i hate you#and you're doing more for the city than my entire order is#and i hate that too and i hate you so much and why do i want to make out with you a little bit#god if we run into him again later in the game now that ariadne's not quite as tied up in her order shit might get weird#also: my notes from the session where we met him read âidk who this dude is but i'm gonna fuckin kill himâ
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fun connection on this archived kickstarter update from the 2011 production/s of "the bus" as found by @broadway-heere-i-come ft. many pics from their trip to wichita, kansas for several performances there, including this one
fantastic stuff & was noticing that it seems like partly legible lyrics back there, which sent me over to consult that q&a sincerely me vlog again like hang on lol. and sure enough
lo, behold
#giving ''every moment'' vs ''where a moment'' but i'm sure either is plausible just based on listening. anyone got a cd insert booklet#tragic that further pages of the kickstarter aren't waybacked up. may not have let you access them if not a backer?#lot of great stuff on page 1 though fr#will roland#hey beautiful#(the The Bus tag lol)#live it up!:#deh#maybe could've used a fourth take actually lmao. let's all watch the 6+ min ''interview'' w/those two seeing spamalot together#love the bit right at the start where someone asks what mike faist's hair smells like & will immediately launches into explaining what it#feels like & michael park is like oh yup. we've all been there. probably the more fun answer anyways#speaking of him b/c it's such a Journey of a video i never remember precisely when mike faist barrels through the door#get out!!! what were you thinking....#used to keep forgetting it happened at all which was a delight. happens during the karaoke / singing in shower answer!#oh i also had the thought like. the Probably Non Phone Photography of 2011 here#noticed that like ''Portrait of someone near the camera with motion blur towards its focus point'' & also noted it as feeling like#a Stock Photo kind of phenomenon now decidedly Out Of Date. then thinking like well that might not be much of a coincidence lol#as in: it would be a spontaneous Photo Effect ppl were more accustomed to At The Time. maybe!#(just realizing fantastic grammatical ambiguity. i meant the ''including this one'' in the opening there to be going off of ''many pics#[...] including this one'' but that it can be interpreted as ''several performances there [...] including this one [will karaoke.jpg]''#like wow works great either way actually lmao. no notes)#p.s. i dunno why some of the lyrics were bolded. did not enter any of the terms into the search. Watch You Smile While Sleeping emphasis
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Kingdom of Ash
Chapters 36-37
Had it been like that in the iron coffin?
Aelin gave no indication that the smothering dark bothered her, and had shown no inclination to illuminate their way. Hadn't even summoned an ember.
But the Little Folk, it seemed, had come prepared. And within heartbeats of entering the pitch-black river passage, blue light had kindled on a lantern dangling over the curved prow. Not light, not even magic. But small worms that glowed pale blue, as if they'd each swallowed the heart of a star. They'd been gathered into the lantern, and their soft light rippled over the water-smooth walls. A gentle, soothing light. At least, for her it was so.
Before Aelin had been given an ancient Faerie Queen's crown, her birthright and heritage.
The queen had stashed Mab's crown in one of their packs, as if it were no more than an extra sword belt. She hadn't spoken, and they had not asked her any questions, either.
Instead, she'd spent these past few hours sitting in the back of the boat, studying her unmarked hands, occasionally peering into the black waters beneath them. What she expected to see beyond her own rippling reflection, Elide didnât want to know.
He'd crawled after Maeve on the beach to save Aelin. And he had found her during her escape-had ensured Aelin made it out. Did it wipe away what he'd done in summoning Maeve in the first place? Even if Maeve had set the trap, even if he hadn't known what Maeve intended for Aelin, did it erase his decision to call for her?
The last time they'd spoken as friends, it had been aboard that ship in the hours before Maeve's armada had arrived. He'd told her they needed to talk, and she'd assumed it was about their future, about them.
But perhaps he'd been about to tell her what he'd done, that he'd been wrong in acting before Aelin's plans played out. Elide stopped twisting the ring.
He'd done it for her. She knew it.
But the queen sitting silently behind them, no trace of that sharp-edged fire to be seen, nor that wicked grin she'd flashed at all who crossed her path ... Two months with a sadist. With two sadists. That had been the cost, and the burden that Aelin and all of them would bear.
That silence, that banked fire was because of him. Not entirely, but in some ways.
The collar had not been real. But the army Maeve had summoned was.
A blink into the gloom was the only indication that he was aware of her every movement. Aelin breathed in his scent, let its strength settle into her a bit deeper.
Their paths would meet again, or they would not. And if he found the final key and then brought it to her, she would pay what the gods demanded. What she owed Terrasen, the world.
Yet if Dorian chose to end it himself, to forge the Lock ... her stomach churned. He had the power. As much as she did, if not more so.
It was meant to be her sacrifice. Her blood shed to save them all. To let him claim it ... She could. She must. With Erawan no doubt unleashing himself on Terrasen, with Maeve's army likely to cause them untold grief, she could let Dorian do this. She trusted him. Even if she might never forgive herself for it. Her debt, it was supposed to have been her debt to pay.
Perhaps the punishment for failing to do so would be having to live with herself.
Having to live with all that had been done to her these months, too.
The blackness of the subterranean river pressed in, wrapped its arms around her and squeezed.
Different from the blackness of the iron box. The darkness she'd found inside herself.
A place she might never escape, not really.
Her power stirred, awakening. Aelin swallowed, refusing to acknowledge it. Heed it.
She wouldn't. Couldn't. Not yet. Until she was ready.
She had seen Rowan's face when she spoke of what his deception with the collar had prompted her to do. Had noted the way her companions looked at her, pity and fear in their eyes. At what had been done to her, what she'd become.
A new body. A foreign, strange body, as if she'd been ripped from one and shoved into another. Different from moving between her forms, somehow. She hadn't tried shifting into her human body yet. Didn't see the point.
Sitting in silence as the boat was pulled through the gloom, she felt the weight of those stares. Their dread. Felt them wondering just how broken she was.
You do not yield.
She knew that had been trueâthat it had been her mother's voice who had spoken and none other.
So she would not yield to this. What had been done. What remained. For the companions around her, to lift their despair, their fear, she wouldn't yield.
She'd fight for it, claw her way back to it, who she'd been before. Remember to swagger and grin and wink. She'd fight against that lingering stain on her soul, fight to ignore it. Would use this journey into the dark to piece herself back together-just enough to make it convincing.
Even if this fractured darkness now dwelled within her, even if speech was difficult, she would show them what they wished to see.
An unbroken Fire-Bringer. Aelin of the Wildfire.
She would show the world that lie as well. Make them believe it.
Maybe she'd one day believe it, too.
Days of near-silent travel passed.
Three days, if whatever senses Rowan and Gavriel possessed proved true. Perhaps the latter carried a pocket watch. Aelin didn't particularly care.
She used each of those days to consider what had been done, what lay before her.
Sometimes, the roar of her magic drowned out her thoughts. Sometimes it slumbered. She never heeded it.
They sailed through the darkness, the river below so black that they might as well have been drifting through Hellas's realm.
She hadn't asked him why he remained in his wolf's body. No one asked her why she remained in her Fae form, after all.
Rowan straightened, eyes sparking at her question-or at the fact that she'd spoken at all.
He'd kept by her these days, a silent, steady presence. Even when they'd slept, he'd remained a few feet away, still not touching, but just there. Close enough that the pine-and-snow scent of him eased her into slumber.
Silence at the order, even from Rowan. Aelin pointed to the lip of shore by the cave mouth. "Stop the boat," she repeated.
The queen had been reckless before Cairn and Maeve had worked on her for two months, but it seemed she'd had any bit of common sense flayed from her.
"Well, I donât have any, so forgive me if I remain alert." No, she'd once told him that while magic flowed in the Lochan bloodline, she had none to speak of. He'd never told her that he'd always considered her cleverness to be a mighty magic on its own, regardless of Anneith's whisperings.
"It will take time for her to readjust."
She stared at him with those damning eyes.
He braced his forearms on his knees. "We got her back. She's with us now. What more do you want?" From me, He didn't need to add Elide straightened.
Elide straightened. "I don't want anything." From you.
This was where they'd have it out, then. "How much longer am I supposed to atone?"
"Are you growing bored with it?" He snarled.
She only glared at him. "I hadn't realized you were even atoning."
"I came here, didn't I?"
"For whom, exactly? Rowan? Aelin?"
"For both of them. And for you." There. Let it be laid before them.
"I told you on that beach: I want nothing to do with you."
"So one mistake and I am your eternal enemy?"
"She is my queen, and you summoned Maeve, then told her where the keys were, and you stood there while they did that to her."
"You have no idea what the blood oath can do. None."
"Fenrys broke the oath. He found a way."
"And had Aelin not been there to offer him another, he would have died." He let out a low, joyless laugh. "Perhaps that's what you would have preferred."
She ignored his last comment. "You didn't even try."
"I did," he snarled. "I fought it with everything I had. And it was not enough. If she'd ordered me to slit your throat, I would have. And if I had found a way to break the oath, I would have died, and she might very well have killed you or taken you afterward. On that beach, my only thought was to get Maeve to forget about you, to let you go-"
"I don't care about me! I didn't care about me on that beach!"
"Well, I do."
This was what came of opening that door to a place inside him that no one had ever breached. This mess, this hollowness in his chest that made him keep needing to make things right.
"Resent me all you like," he said, damning the hoarseness of his words. "I'm sure I'll survive."
Hurt flashed in her eyes. "Fine," she said, her voice brittle.
He hated that brittleness more than anything he'd ever encountered. Hated himself for causing it. But he had limits to how low he'd crawl.
He'd said his piece. If she wanted to wash her hands of him forever, then he would find a way to respect that. Live with it.
Somehow.
Gratitude shone in her eyes.
Rowan only gave her a nod. Don't worry about it.
Yet Aelin turned away, shutting off that silent conversation as she surveyed the space.
Time. It would take time for her to heal.
Even if he knew his Fireheart would pretend otherwise.
So, Rowan looked, too. Across the tomb, beyond the sarcophagus and treasure, an archway opened into another chamber. Perhaps another tomb, or an exit passage.
"We don't have time to find a way out,"
Rowan murmured as she strode into the tomb.
"And the caves remain safer than the surface."
"I'm not looking for a way out," she said in that calm, unmoved voice. She stooped, swiping up a fistful of gold coins stamped with forgotten king's face. "We're going to need to fund our travels. And the gods know what else." Rowan arched a brow. Aelin shrugged and shoved the gold into the pocket of her cloak. "Unless the pitiful clinking I heard from your coin purse didn't indicate you were low on funds."
That spark of wry humor, the taunting ⌠She was trying. For his sake, or the others' maybe her own, she was trying.
Rowan gave the Lion a slashing grin. "You heard the lady."
A flash ruptured from where Fenrys had been sniffing at a trunk of jewels, and then a male was standing there. His gray clothes worn, but intactin better shape than the hollowed-out look in his eyes.
Aelin paused her looting.
Fenrys's throat bobbed, as if trying to remember speech. Then he said hoarsely, "We needed more pockets." He patted his own for emphasis.
Aelin's lips curved in a hint of a smile. She blinked at Fenrysâthree times.
Fenrys blinked once in answer.
A code. They'd made up some silent code to communicate when he'd been ordered to remain in his wolf form.
Aelin's smile remained, just barely, as she walked to the golden-haired male, his bronze skin ashen. She opened her arms in silent offer.
To let him decide if he wished for contact. If he could endure it.
Just as Rowan would let her decide if she wished to touch him.
A small sigh broke from Fenrys before he folded Aelin into his arms, a shudder rippling through him. Rowan couldn't see her face, perhaps didn't need to, as her hands gripped Fenrys's jacket, so tightly they were white-knuckled.
A good signâa small miracle, that either of them wished, could be touched. Rowan reminded himself of it, even while some intrinsic, male part of him tensed at the contact.
A territorial Fae bastard, she'd once called him. He'd do his best not to live up to that title.
"Thank you," Aelin said, her voice small in a way that made Rowan's chest crack further.
Fenrys didn't answer, but from the anguish on his face, Rowan knew no thanks were in order.
They pulled away, and Fenrys cupped her cheek. "When you are ready, we can talk."
About what they'd endured. To unravel all that had happened.
Aelin nodded, blowing out a breath. "Likewise."
She resumed shoving gold into her pockets, but glanced back to Fenrys, his face drawn. "I gave you the blood oath to save your life," she said. "But if you do not want it, Fenrys, I ... we can find some way to free youâ"
"I want it," Fenrys said, no trace of his usual swaggering humor. He glanced to Rowan, and bowed his head. "It is my honor to serve this court. And serve you," he added to Aelin.
She waved a hand in dismissal, though Rowan didn't fail to note the sheen in her eyes as she stooped to gather more gold. Giving her a moment, he strode to Fenrys and clasped his shoulder. "It's good to have you back." He added, stumbling a bit on the word, "Brother." For that's what they would be. Had never been before, but what Fenrys had done for Aelin .. Yes, brother was what Rowan would call him. Even if Fenrys's ownâ
Fenrys's dark eyes flickered. "She killed Connall. Made him stab himself in the heart." A pearl-and-ruby necklace scattered from Gavriel's fingers.
The temperature in the tomb spiked, but there was no flash of flame, no swirl of embers.
As if Aelin's magic had surged, only to be leashed again.
Yet Aelin continued shoving gold and jewels into her pockets.
She'd witnessed it, too. That slaughter.
But it was Gavriel, approaching on silent feet even with the jewels and gold on the floor, who clasped Fenrys's other shoulder. "We will make sure that debt is paid before the end." The Lion had never uttered such words not toward their former queen. But fury burned in Gavriel's tawny gaze. Sorrow and fury.
Fenrys took a steadying breath and stepped away, the loss on his face mingling with something Rowan couldn't place. But now wasn't the time to ask, to pry.
Aelin continued picking her way amongst the treasure, however. She'd been more selective than the rest of them, examining pieces with what Rowan had assumed was a jeweler's eye. The gods knew she'd owned enough finery to tell what would fetch the highest price at market.
"We should go," he said. His own pockets were near to bursting, his every step weighed down.
She rose from a rusted metal chest she'd been riffling through.
Rowan remained still as she approached, something clenched in her palm. It was only when she stopped close enough for him to touch her that she unfurled her fingers.
Two golden rings lay there.
"I don't know the Fae customs," she said.
The thicker ring held an elegantly cut ruby within the band itself, while the smaller one bore a sparkling rectangular emerald mounted atop, the stone as large as her fingernail. "But when humans wed, rings are exchanged." Her fingers trembled-just slightly. Too many unspoken words lay between them. Yet now was not the time for that conversation, for that healing.
Not when they had to be on their way as swiftly as possible, and this offer she'd made him, this proof that she still wanted what lay between them, the vows they'd sworn ...
"I assume the sparkly emerald is for me," Rowan said with a half smile.
She huffed a laugh. The soft, whispered sound was as precious as the rings she'd found for them in this hoard. She took his hand, and he tried not to shudder in relief, tried not to fall to his knees as she slid the ruby ring onto his finger. It fit him perfectly, the ring no doubt forged for the king lying in this barrow.
Silently, Rowan grasped her own hand and eased on the emerald ring. "To whatever end," he whispered.
Silver lined her eyes. "To whatever end." A reminder-and a vow, more sacred than the wedding oaths they'd sworn on that ship.
To walk this path together, back from the darkness of the iron coffin. To face what waited in Terrasen, ancient promises to the gods be damned.
He ran his thumb over the back of her hand.
"I'll make the tattoo again." She swallowed, but nodded. "And," he added, "I'd like to add another. To meâand to you."
Her brows flicked up, but he squeezed her hand. You'll have to wait and see, Princess.
Another hint of a smile. She didn't balk from the silent words this time. Typical.
He opened his mouth to voice the question he'd been dying to ask for days now. May I kiss you? But she pulled her hand from his.
Admiring the wedding band sparkling on her finger, her mouth tightened as she turned over her palm. "I'll need to retrain."
Not a single callus marked her hands.
Aelin frowned at her too-thin body. "And pack on some muscle again." A slight quiver graced her words, but she curled her hands into fists at her sides and smirked at her clothesâthe Mistward clothes. "It'll be just like old times."
Trying. She was dredging up that swagger and trying. So he would, too. Until she didn't need to any more.
Rowan gave her a crooked grin. "Just like old times," he said, following her out of the barrow and back toward the ebony river, "but with far less sleep."
He could have sworn the passageway heated. But Aelin kept going.
Later. That conversation, this unfinished business between them, would come later.
#Chapter 36#Kingdom of Ash#Sarah J. Maas#Aelin Galathynius#Rowan Whitethorn#Elide Lochan#Lorcan Salvaterre#Gavriel#Fenrys#first read along with me no spoilers please more spoilers in further notes with tags quotes reacts annotated etc perspective 1 Elide#The way they all keep asking is that what she felt like-Finally dozing-Therapy boat time-They stole something beautiful&bright#If not even Elide can standup itâs short-The quiet time space-Forgive urself4him-Lets give it all2Erawan-Not fragile-Not hiding well#Never yield-the fact the lilfolk were prepared for no magic-it gives Jess day meets Millie Bobby brown princess movieWhealing glowworms#is Elide afraid of the dark?she did say rattle the stars-always heartbeats to measure timeWlilfolk-eyes gleamingWanimalistic brightness#Fenrys dozing@queens feet-get they snuggled close-position of honor at feet-Gabriel explains golden hair silvered by moonlight (beam?)#the ring-none of them want to know-knowing where to find HER-Closer2her than he'd sat in weeks-sending her attention (knowing where 2 find)#4long heartbeats she let herself look at him-she knew it 2#P2Aelin-4long heartbeats she let herself look at him-she knew it 2-inky black hair spilling over a coat of whitest snow#Her fingers curled in her lap-the fact living has begun to feel like punishment-a better lie-the swagger fire back#Chapter 37-perspective Aelin pt 1-if only there was tech-3days time-whats the tell?So long travel-let him take it so she can kill Erowan#Not the weights again-the avoided speech like Lys-To answer questions that he was perhaps not yet ready to discuss.#Might begin simply screaming and screaming at what had been done to them to Connall-is the far her animal form-THEM-but as the blue light#of the lantern touched it gold glittered along the rocky floor.Ancient gold-genius-stop the boat-they listened to her Cadre-didnât wait or#stay or care-Aelin didn't bother to see who obeyed as she strode into the cave-Lorcan refrained from saying that;good pick-Not firelight#She hadnt shown an ember since theyd entered the cave-power notes-Her dark eyes slid to him-from you-why river?-knees!#reverse Lysaedion-well I care u idiot-looked away looked anywhere but at him-life with ur#reverse Lysaedion-well I care-looked away looked anywhere but at him-lifeWoff what had needed2stop she needed2see he could only guess#Kings has made it-watched-As if she wouldnt couldnt touch her power-he saw every side-my last/accent-wait hug notice#Unravel it-fill in-pretend-where?-pirating is nice-another mark theirs&loved enough tove said it-whatever end-known-silver lined#u wish-what isn't recognized-Sardothien swagger-leashing the power-as close to a wedding4them as weâll get
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another interesting thing i bump into when it comes to writing these fics to publish is that i feel the need to continually specify that these characters are thirty because otherwise i'm really worried that people will think they're teenagers based purely on the fact that they live with their parents, which is frustrating in a way i have trouble articulating
#N posts stuff#like in the one i'm working on this week the Changeling spends a not insignificant amount of time fretting about the potential#that its mom won't let it do something without supervision and every time i write it part of me is so adverse to the teenager allegations#that i almost want to do a ff.net style midline author's note (***AN: THE CHANGELING IS 28 YEARS OLD***)#i like you too#idk i just feel like i never see 'still living with your parents' narratives and then even fewer when like. that relationship dynamic#has not shifted with age to something on the 'basically equals' level you know? so i feel like i need to clarify this constantly#anyway i added mixtape playlists to all the OC pages on neocities; tiffany's is still comparatively sparse but all 3 are still WIPs#'mixtape' as in 'music the character would Listen to' not 'music that represents the character' btw
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âwell punk is rooted in socialist beliefsssssssâ okay cool. call yourself a socialist and get out of my music subgenre
#text#my post#mobi#itâs sort of a all punks are socialists (or at least should be because yes in practice thatâs not necessarily what happens)#but not all socialists are punks. which is fine. like everyone wants to be a cool kid but you do actually have to listen to the music to#call yourself a fan of the music. sorry. i donât know why this is like. mean to say.#like idk! i donât even call MYSELF a punk because i donât live the aesthetic all the time!#like i listen to the music and am involved in some scenes a bit but even ME. WHO LIKES AND IS ON SOME LEVEL INVOLVED WITH LIKING THE MUSIC#even iâm like yeah but am i a punk??? and at that point i KNOW ohhhhhh being kind is punk letting sunshine flow out of your ass is punk#crowd sure as shit isnât. okay. sorry. done.#edit: some people in the notes are pointing out the subculture =/= the music genre and there are people who donât or canât listen to music#who are involved. this is all true! i apologize for not including this in my discussion#and that is true. obviously. however i need to point out once again that those people do PICK UP AESTHETICS and are involved in the spaces#and movement so my point still stands. sorry for leaning so heavily on the music aspect my b
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i am my father's son (enjoyer of irl sidequests)
#i didn't get to do the sidequest i almost got though đ#i exited my apartment. theres a guy outside and i greet him bc i assumed he was a neighbour#and he greets me back and then hes like im sorry i hopped over the fence as a shortcut idk if that's fine#nd then continued and said he'll check if he dropped something#and i'm like yea ok sure!#bc i was going to lidl and i wanted to get going but i did just stand there for a bit in case the guy needed help or something#then he emerged from the fence area and he was like ''if you find something in there can you pick it up akd put out a note'' and i was like#yea ofc! i'll do that if i see anything#and then he was like this is a very nice area so i trust people will let me know if i did drop something#and i was like for sure#im not great at smalltalk but he was very polite so i tried my best#also he seemed like he wasnt having the best time#he might have been on something bc he was slurring his speech and drooling a lot and there was a certain look in his eyes but honestly that#none of my business#we said bye and i sat in my car and then he was like ''hey actually i live like a minute away super close but my bag is super heavy#can i get a ride there it's super close next to [redacted]''#and i moved my bag from the front seat and was like ''yea sure''#and then he stared at me for a bit and was like ''actually i dont want to bother you have a nice day bye'' and left with a wave#i was like you too and waved back#he didnt look like he had any trouble walking so i came to the conclusion that he's fine and then went to lidl#but honestly i am a bit disappointed he didnt want me to give him a ride after all bc he seemed like he would have interesting things to sa#he was super polite and talked a lot and despite me being a finn i dont always mind strangers talking to me#bc if i have nothing important to do it's like. might as well!#another chat outside my apartment ive had was this old lady and she knew a lot about the history of the area we live in#and it was very interesting and also like i said if im in no hurry to go anywhere i love listening to ppl yap about whatever#i hope both the fence hopping guy and the old lady are doing good#leevi talks
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talk baby â・°âŠ



{mlb!megumi fushiguro x f!reader}
summary: itâs the season of the world series!â your little life with megumi absolutely warm and loving as you spent every waking moment together, the both of you never failing to hang out or speak to one another since the very moment you two made it official. but when the higher ups start demanding more of megumi to bring the world series home, tiring him out and causing him to lose sleep? a wedge is driven between you both as megumi tells you words he wished heâd never said.
warnings: MDNI. afab!reader, cursing, FLUFF, ANGSTYY, p in v sex, unprotected sex (wrap it yall), SMUT, baseball talk, megumi LOOVESS YOUU my goodness, DONINANT AF MEGUMI OBVIOUSLYYY, creampie, shower sex, DIRTY TALK megumi has a filthy mouth, megumi and reader get into a fight, itâs the world series, all characters are aged up.
word count: 12.5k (IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY-)
authors note: THE WAIT IS FINALLY OVERRR FUCK i cannot thank you all enough for the support with these series. i saw all of your AMAZING suggestions and sprinkled them all over THANK YOU!! i POURED my heart into this and i really hope you all love itttttt :,( STAY TUNED FOR THE NEXT FIC OF THIS SERIES AAHHH!! I LOVE YOU MWAHHH <33
i highly highly advise you to read the first part of this fic or else you wonât be able to understand some of the storyline and references :( you can find it here!
â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘
megumi fushiguro loved how much you talked.
ââand then i went to the bakery down the street from my campus to get that one coffee cake i always get? the one you brought me after my class?â
âmhm.â
âbut they were freaking out of it itâs like they knew i was coming to take their stock man. it was seven in the morning how the fuck are you out of coffee cake?â
megumi laughed softly and pressed a slow sweet kiss to your cheek, readjusting his arms around your waist as he scooched your body closer to his on his lap, the both of you on his huge black bean bag that sat in his living room as he leaned the side of his head back on your shoulder, relaxed and a little sleepy.
âso then i had to go to the one on campus, even though i already know it doesnât taste the sameâŚâ you sighed sadly. âwhat if they did that on purpose? what if they want me to stop coming?â
megumi huffed an amused breath through his nose and shook his head gently against your shoulder. âdonât think so baby. i feel like you keep them in business with how much you go.â
you huffed and crossed your arms, grumbling. âyet they treat me like this...â
tilting your head down then to get a better look at him, you peeked at his sleepy face and tired eyes as he tried his absolute hardest to stay awake for you, wanting to listen to everything you had to say and more, but his eyelids drooping every couple of seconds before opening back up again just not letting him.
you smiled softly and carded your fingers through his black hair, pushing the front strands back and giving him a cute peck on his forehead.
âtake a nap gumi⌠youâre so tired i can see it.â
âuh uh.â megumi hummed.
he lifted his head groggily and propped his chin up on your shoulder, eyes closed.
âkeep going.â he murmured, his words a little slurred. âdid you end up getting your coffee cake from the other bakery..?â
âi did.â you responded softly, caressing your thumb over his warm cheek as your soothing voice lulled him. âit was nasty. the end. câmon baby you have practice tomorrowââ
âno.â
âgumi itâs late i donât want to keep you uuupp.â you whined, nudging him.
âif you sleep over.â he mumbled.
âbut i have class tomorrow.â
âiâll take you.â
âbut you always do and i feel badâŚâ you pinched his cheek softly. âitâs okay i canââ
âdonât care.â
you giggled. âwell i do. i want you to get more sleep gumi, your practices are crazy long now and you have them like everydayââ
he groaned loudly and ushered you up, you complying as you watched him lazily stand from the bean bag and grab you, baggy eyes half lidded as he picked you up from around your legs and threw you over his shoulderâ something he always did ever since the day he confessed, and something you absolutely floored over whenever he did it.
your giggles rang through his quiet and spacious apartment that made him sleepily smile as he lazily carried you down the hall and to his room, setting you softly to sit on his plush bed as he pressed a sleepy kiss to the top of your head, though nearly almost missing, him leaning back up and grabbing the hem of his black shirtâ pulling it over his head and carelessly tossing it somewhere in the room before climbing into bed.
you felt so so bad. the teamâs schedule was released just two weeks prior, and seeing as the world series was coming upâ the most important segment of competitive games they could possibly ever have, the coaches and managers were grinding and overworking their players to pure fucking filth, them wanting to keep their streak as the number one baseball team no matter what it took.
and because of that, megumi was always so tired and stressedâ holding on day by day as the higher ups demanded so much of him because he was the most skilled on the team, him spending his days trying to stay awake and make time for youâ picking you up from class and taking you out to lunch like he always did, but your worried gaze always on his dark under eyes as you insisted and told him already that you understood, that he didnât need to right now if it was over the subject of his career.
and especially if it was for the world series.
âlay down.â he murmured, patting the pillow next to him as he peeked at you with one eye open.
you stood, pulled the covers back and hopped in, megumiâs arm immediately snaking around your waist and pulling your back to his bare chest, his face nuzzling in your hair as you noticed how quickly his breathing deepened, falling asleep almost the minute you got settled in his arms and fitting like a little puzzle piece.
it had been almost an entire year since you and megumi started dating, and you have never ever been happier in your life as you thanked your lucky stars over and over again for being such a dumbassâ wholly believing that if one thing had changed, it wouldnât have played out the way that it did.
and you adored the way that it played out.
megumi was so affectionate. everyday. his love language being physical touch as he literally never left you alone and always had to be touching you in any given situationâ like his hand on your thigh whenever he drove, playing with your fingers from across the table while out at a restaurant⌠and like now, his toned body literally engulfing you into his that it made you feel so cared for and warm and loved, something you always wanted to feel for the rest of your life as long as it was with him.
the next morning he drove you to school like he said he would, and then went straight to practice after, you telling him that you would be there once your classes were over.
and when you did get to the stadium later that day, megumi was mad.
âwhat the fuck happened?â you quickly sat next to your best friend on the sidelines, her snickering as you both watched megumi tell off another player for fumbling a double play on the field.
âtheyâre making more errors today,â your girl friend sighed. âtheyâre all nervous since their division series game is tomorrow and theyâre getting closer to the big thing⌠but megumi is not having it.â
âyou bobbled the ball go to first fucking base and eat it what the hell are you doing trying toââ
you gnawed at your bottom lip.
it was common for megumi to bark out orders and take charge on the field, that wasnât out of the ordinary, but it was only here and there where he was yelling and insulting the rest of his teammates like that (mostly rarely). a sign you knew was because he was stressing the fuck out.
âwhat you just did was a kiddie fucking error we wonât make it to the world series like this dingus the fuck are youââ
you covered your face and groaned. âi canât watch⌠i donât think iâve seen him like this since that one day he asked me to come here.â
âyou mean the day he ate you out inââ
âshuuushhh!â your hands shot out and slapped over her mouth as she let out a muffled laugh, your eyes wide and cheeks pink as you frantically looked around to see if anybody had heard her.
she took your wrists then and pulled them away. âhave you guys even had sex yet? how many times am i gonna ask you until you say yesââ
you nudged her away. âno! we havenât yet.â
you didnât know why you hadnâtâ the topic just one that was never brought up by either of you.
but youâve definitely done other things though.
megumi was like a dog, not knowing the meaning of âkeep your hands to yourselfâ as he was always groping your ass in public out of no where just to hear you squeak in surprise, shoving his hands down your pants and making you cum repeatedly on his fingers when youâre both innocently just watching a movie on his couch, pressing his face into your tits and sucking hickeys whenever you wore a low cut shirt, and bullying his way in between your legs to lick and devour you up whenever he felt like itâ all things he did with zero hesitation nor self control.
you werenât complaining though, definitely notâ you were just as freaky.
because every time megumi wore those gray sweatpants after practices that you loved oh so very much, no shirt on with his perfect toned body out only for your eyesâ your mouth was on him, licking his chest all the way down to his pelvis, tugging the waistband of his sweatpants and boxers down until all that was left before you was his mlb dick, you taking him into your mouth and sucking the absolute life out of him until he was shaking and breathlessly chanting your pretty name like a prayerâ
âbreak!â
you pulled yourself from your thoughts and stood, your eyes already watching the way megumi walked over from across the field with his head down, chest heaving and his face glistening with sweat against the setting sun, his baseball uniform covered in dirt.
both you and your girl friend walked down the steps and towards the bullpen, you quickly grabbing a clean white hand towel from the gatorade jug rack beforehand and catching up, spotting yuji and megumi already seated inside on a bench.
upon megumi noticing you coming up, he smiled softly, tiredly.
âyou guys are sucking today.â your best friend deadpanned, and you elbowed her.
âno. you guys just look really nervous⌠is everything okay?â
you took a seat next to megumi and silently offered the clean towel, him gently bringing up your extended wrist and pecking it in gratitude before taking the towel and wiping down his face, your cheeks flushing in response.
yuji sighed deeply and shook his head, scratching the back of his neck. âeveryoneâs literally losing it. we win every year but each year that comes is extra added pressure to keep that up.â
megumi nodded wordlessly in agreement, his head hung.
âwell this is your first bad practice isnât it?â you softly mentioned.
âyeah⌠maybe itâs just today and you guys will be okay tomorrow.â your girl friend added, smiling comfortingly at yuji, him giving her the same smile back but with apprehension in his eyes.
âwouldâve been fine if it was yesterday.â megumi cut in, voice monotone. ânot today. not when itâs the last leg for the world series.â
he leaned back against the wall and crossed his arms with closed eyes, yuji nodding next to him.
you pulled your lips into a thin line, heavy anxiety brewing in your chest at the thought of them possibly losing before even getting into the league championships, something their team has never done before as theyâve always just gone straight through.
in order to get through to the world series, their team has to win the division series and the league championships, then they earn their rightful shining spot of playing in the world series and winningâ something megumi has been a part of for almost three years now, and something the team has dominated over for five consecutive years straight.
but what if this year was different?
âhow are you feeling?â you gently asked megumi after a bit. âi saw you were a little mad today on the fieldâŚâ
he slowly pried his eyes open and looked at you, sighing softly through his nose.
âmâfine pretty baby.â he murmured. âtheyâre just not playing like they should be.â
megumi took his cap off and scratched the side of his head, his eyebrows furrowed in annoyance. âand neither am i to be honest.â
your eyes softened.
âwhat do you mean?â
âmâjust not meeting the standards i set for myself.â
âbut you play well in every game gumi..â you mumbled. âdonât overwork yourself please. just keep doing what youâve been doing⌠itâs been going great so far, hasnât it?â
he gave you a little smile and lazily reached up to delicately caress and run the ends of your hair through his fingers. âi need to amp it up though. i need to try harder.â
âtry harder when youâre already winning?â you quirked a confused brow.
he nodded.
âwhatâs the reason behind that?â
megumi gave you a sly smile. âbecause youâll be watching me.â
you gawked, shaking your head at him. âgumi, you know anything that you do makes me freak out and itâs embarrassing...â you subconsciously tugged a bit at the sides of his jersey. âthe way you tied my shoes for me the other day made me freak out. the way you pumped my gas last week made me freak out. the way you stuck your fingers inside my puââ
his eyes bulged open as he shot forward and muffled you with a kiss, you kissing him back and laughing cutely once he pulled away.
ânasty mouthâŚâ he mumbled, but the little grin on his face made you giggle as he put his cap back on over his head and nudged it down, trying to conceal his eyes and the blushing of his cheeksâ but you catching on anyways.
âhow was class?â he asked quietly, readjusting his cap. âdid you get your coffee cake after i dropped you off?â
you shook your head. âno because iâd rather die than get the one on campus. they need to close that place down.â
megumi snorted, but his eyebrows pinched momentarily as he took your hand in his and started playing with your fingers. âyou shouldâve told me. i wouldâve drove you to the one you like.â
âno gumi i wasnât gonna make you do that... i wanted you to sleep in as much as possible.â
âiâll take you after practice.â
âno! you need to nap after donât waste timeââ
âmânot wasting time.â he replied, but before you could get another word in, his coach called all players back on field.
âiâll see you after.â he stood and pecked your forehead. âi love you pretty baby.â
you smiled shyly, your cheeks a cute pink.
âi love you too.â
thankfully, megumi didnât seem as pissed off for the rest of practice, and you hoped it was because of the little chat you had with him in the bullpen prior and that it cheered him up in some wayâ the team playing a lot better and actually working together this time instead of being at each others throats over feeble mistakes.
and when they were all finally back at the locker rooms packed up and ready to go, you organized his clean uniform for tomorrow and hung his gloves neatly inside his locker, closing it once you were done.
âyou donât have to do that baby.â he murmured, gesturing to his locker as he swung his duffel bag over his shoulder and extended a hand. âorganize. i can do that.â
âbut i like doing it...â you took his offering hand and interlaced your fingers with his. âit helps you find things quicker.â
you both stepped out, quickly bidding your girl friend and yuji goodbye on the way as you walked down the echoey hallway together.
ââyou also donât have to drive me to school every morning but you do that anyways.â
he smiled. âtouchĂŠ.â
he led you out of the arena and over to the private parking area for players and crewâ him opening the passenger side door for you to step inside and shutting it after, throwing his duffel bag to the back once he got in the drivers seat.
and like he always did, megumi buckled you up himself, grabbing the seat belt strap and pulling it over you to click on the other side with a kiss to your cheekâ him never letting you do it yourself since the day you two properly met.
âdo they sell food at the bakery?â he looked over at you as he pulled out. âthey do donât they.â
âthey do!â you nodded sweetly. âbut weâre not going.â
âwhy.â
âbecause you need to sleepââ
âno.â
âmegumiââ
he shot you a glare and you squeaked.
âgumi! i-i meant gumi!â
he fixed his glare and broke out into a small smile instead, laughing lightly as he set his big hand over your thigh and squeezed lovingly.
you giggled softly.
âlunch first and then iâll sleep.â
âoh myââ
you reached over for the door handle and pulled, brows furrowing once the lock wouldnât budge after multiple frantic tries.
âyou still have child lock on?!â
megumi shielded his mouth to hide his snicker, eyes to the road.
âuh huh.â
âwhy?!â
he gave you a deadpanned look and pointed to the door. âexhibit a, baby. the car is moving.â
âgumi if you hate me just say that.â
pulling into the bakeryâs parking lot, he playfully rolled his eyes at your comment and pinched your cheek gently.
âbe quiet.â
the bakery was a cute little place that was a frequent pit stop for the both of you to pick up breakfast on the way to the things you had to do in the morningsâ always cozy and warm and filled with little trinkets and postcards of places from around the world, you always gushing when you or megumi would spot a new souvenir on the walls or on the shelves, and him sometimes having to stop you from snatching some for yourselfâŚ
âthey have a million!â you whispered. âthey wonât notice this one. please itâs from greece itâll look cute on my fridge!â
megumi sipped his lemonade and gave you a half lidded look as you both sat in a booth.
âi donât know if anyone has ever told you this but.â he gently slid the coffee cake closer to you, silently ushering you to eat. âthatâs called stealing.â
ânot if they donât notice.â
megumi gave you an amused smile.
âiâll take one for you too!â
âfor me?â
âyeah!â you put your elbow on the table and propped your chin on your palm, tilting your head with the cutest expression megumi has ever seen in his fucking life.
âiâd do anything for you.â
his cheeks flooded pink, and he swallowed thickly.
megumi would do anything for you.
âi appreciate that pretty baby,â he murmured, tenderly tracing the pad of his index finger mindlessly around the back of your hand.
âgreat! so can i do it?â
âno.â
âmaaannnn!â you slumped over the table and pouted. âyouâre no fun.â
he chuckled and took a bite out of his ham and cheese deli, your mannerisms sometimes reminding him of his dad.
he swallowed.
âgojo wants to meet you.â
you froze. âreally? he does?â
megumi nodded.
âokay! thatâs okayâ wait no! waitââ you groaned and leaned against the booth. âi donât think heâs gonna like me very muchâŚâ
âhuh?â his eyebrows furrowed. âwhy do you say that?â
you peered up at him sheepishly. âbecause i talk too much⌠iâm not gonna notice and end up telling him my lore, my school gpa, and my social security number.â
megumi laughed, and your heart fluttered at the sight of his crinkling eyes and gorgeous smile, the sound of it making you swoon.
he shook his head and rubbed his sleepy eyelids. âno baby... heâd love you. i know he would.â
âi donât know gumiâŚâ you sighed, looking down at your lap. âi want to meet him of course! thatâs a given⌠but..â
megumi quirked a brow. âbut?â
âi just donât want to look stupidâŚâ you laughed nervously. âitâs happened before where my friends parents say iâm a blabber mouth and i donât want to embarrass youââ
his tired eyes narrowed. âblabber mouth? whoâs saying youâre a blabber mouth?â
âmyâ my ex boyfriend in high schoolâŚâ you cowered a little. âbut itâs okay because i was over sharing!ââ
âno.â he said firmly, his gaze looking directly into yours. âyouâre not a blabbermouth. thereâs a difference between being really open and friendly with people right off the bat and being a blabbermouth.â
megumi shook his head in annoyance. how could someone ever say you were a blabbermouth? he had never heard something that was so far from the truth.
you were too sweet for your own good, that was your only fault. you considered everyone you met a close friend of yours and werenât afraid to tell them whatever came to your precious mind and made them feel welcomeâ something that megumi adored so much about you⌠so much, and something that made him borderline violent when people berated you for it.
âthey just canât handle it when someone is actually genuine. like you. and thatâs not your fault.â
the shiniest smile grew on your face then, your eyes sparkling and feeling like a million fucking butterflies were fluttering all over your tummyâ internally screaming at his words.
âthank you gumiâŚâ you spoke softly. âiâm glad at least you donât see an issue with it.â
âi donât.â he shook his head. âi donât at all.â
he loved it.
the rest of your lunch date was spent with megumi still not letting you steal the greece trinket magnet from the wall, you scolding him for the bags under his eyes, and him buying you two more slices of coffee cake to go no matter how many times you told him it was okay, the both of you gathering your things and going back to his car after a bit for him to drop you off back home.
âiâll be here in the morning to take you to class.â he said gently, turning the corner and nearing your street.
âwhat? isnât the division series game tomorrow?â you asked, taken aback. âgumi no just get as much sleep as you can itâs a big day. i can take myself.â
he looked at you boredly.
âno.â
âguumiii!â
he pulled into your driveway and shifted his gear into park, the corners of his mouth turned upward into a little goofy grin.
âi can take you baby itâs fine,â he pushed gently. âdonât worry.â
âyouâve been stressed though⌠and tired.â
you unbuckled your seatbelt and reached over, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him in as he immediately leaned in and tucked his face into your neck, breathing in your honeyed perfume and letting himself slump into your soft frame.
âplease promise me that after the division series, youâll rest up like crazy before the league championships.â he pulled back slightly to look at you, his eyes nearly closing as he sleepily blinked. âokay?â
âleague championships? didnât know we already won.â he murmured.
you giggled. âobviously. youâre my cool baseball man, are you not?â
he tiredly grinned and pressed a sweet sweet kiss to your cheek, him biting down on it after and making you yelp before snickering and pulling away.
âbye gumi,â you quickly grabbed a slice of coffee cake and placed it on his leg. âhere eat this on the way home so you donât fall asleep.â
he chuckled and watched as you grabbed your things, hopped out, and ran across the front of his car, leaning your head in through his open window once you reached him and pressing your soft lips to his, megumi fucking melting at the feeling.
you pulled apart and he pecked you one last timeâ a series of i love youâs iterated before you backed away and waved excitedly from your front door, him waiting until you were inside to reverse, his engine roaring and his black car shining against the moonlight as he sped down the street.
the next morning you got up around the time that you usually did, showered and did your hair and got ready for class, packed your school bag and made your bedâ
but megumi hadnât texted you. like at all.
he usually sent you a good morning text, followed by him letting you know when he was leaving the house, followed by when he was on his way, and followed by when he was just down the street and pulling up.
except you got nothing.
you figured maybe today was just one of those days where he maybe just simply forgot and was already on his way, but as you stood literally outside of your house, gnawing on your thumb and the time coming painfully close to the start of your morning class as you still got nothing from megumi (even when you had texted him multiple times at this point), you started shitting it.
just as you were about to run inside to get the keys to your car, your phone buzzed as a picture of you and megumi flashed across the screen.
megumi!
âhelââ
âbaby!ââ he breathed out, frantic. âbaby iâm sorry iâm so sorry iâm coming okay im down the streetââ
âwhat happened?â you breathed out worriedly, your heart hammering against your chest.
âi overslept!ââ he explained quickly. âiâm late to the teamâs call time andâ and youâre late to class and iâ fuck!â
you heard his horn blare and his tires screech as muffled curses flew from his mouth, you jumping at the noise.
âsorry sorry someone cut me off iâm almost thereââ
âno gumi go straight to the stadium youâre late!â you spoke firmly. âi can take myselfââ
âno but i wanted to see you before the gameââ
âitâs fine we can see each other after the game okay? when you winââ you grabbed your keys from the coffee table by your door and ran out, unlocking your car and getting in. âyouâre late baby so fucking late please turn back this isnât good coach is gonna chew you outââ
âshit! i know i knowââ
âgo gumi hang up itâs okay!â
âokay.. fuck okay okayââ
you heard rustling on the other line before he spoke again.
âi love you iâm sorry ill see you after!â
and the line went dead.
you slugged through the rest of your classes as the day felt way fucking longer than it normally did, you desperately just wanting to see megumi and know that he was okay, that he wasnât in trouble with his coach and the management team for being over an hour late to the division series call time, you on the verge of literal tears multiple times over him.
your best friend and you had planned to get ready for the game together and sport your menâs jerseys from the standsâ a girlâs night you were agonizingly looking forward to all freaking month, and so so excited that the day was finally here to support and be present for the making of yet another year for the boysâ team.
âand then he hung up. i thought he was gonna get into a wreck manââ
you ran your fingers through your styled hair in your vanity mirror, your best friend readjusting her jersey behind youâ âitadoriâ in big capital letters on the back.
âmegumi is the most hard headed mean stubborn man i have ever come across in my life.â she searched around in her makeup bag, pulling out her lip liner and reapplying next to you. âi donât know how many times you told him to sleep and get some rest. and yuji too! he hasnât stopped talking about him since the schedule change and now iâm starting to think heâs in love with him.â
you laughed loudly.
âi knowâŚâ you sighed anxiously through your nose, nervous clammy jitters in your chest. âhis eye bags have gotten so bad this past week.â
âi think itâs because heâs been practicing over time.â
you stopped.
âwhat do you mean?â
she looked at you quizzically. âi thought you knew? yuji told me that the higher ups had a meeting with megumi and told him that they were expecting him to bring the world series home.â
she popped the lid back on her lip liner and threw it in her bag. âhe practices all night on the field until like four am.â
âwhat the fuck?â your eyes narrowed. âhe never told me that? he picks me up for my seven am class everyday⌠that means heâs only been getting whatâ like two and a half hours of sleep this past week?â
she stopped. âhe didnât tell you?â
âno!â you exclaimed. âwhen was this meeting?â
âat the start of last week.â
âoh my god.â you grumbled.
why didnât he tell you?
âthatâs fucked up.â she shook her head. âtalk to him about that after babe⌠i donât know why this man didnât tell you something like that.â
âi wouldâve never let him pick me up for class if i knew this was going onâŚâ you gloomily fiddled with the buttons on your jersey. âor hang out with me after practice.â
and why the hell were the higher ups demanding so much from megumi? why were they burning him out with a responsibility so huge as to ensuring the success of the team for the world series? that wasnât fair to him. that wasnât fair at all.
your girl friend hugged you comfortingly.
âitâs fine donât worry about it okay?⌠just talk to him after.â
once at the stadium, you and your best friend squeezed and pushed through the crowd to get to the v.i.p. section, the both of you sweating and panting over having run across the stadiumâs parking lot and the main area, all because your best friend couldnât decide which way to do her hair, and because you couldnât decide if you should wear a skirt or jeans.
you ended up choosing for each other and calling it a day.
âhey! you guys!â
you both snapped your heads up and you recognized the source of the voice as one of the assistant crew members of the team, jogging up to you guys with two devices in his hands.
âyou guys want these radios or are you good? theyâre connected to the announcers and have earbuds!â
âoh iâll take one! thank you!â you answered politely, smiling as he passed you and your best friend a radio.
you pushed the earbud into your left ear and sat.
the crowd was buzzing and cheering with excitement, flashes of light shimmering throughout the sold out stadium as many held up posters and signs or bobble heads, you smiling wide every time you spotted a few of megumiâs face and name.
the air was warm, and every kind of news reporter, publicist, and journalist was present on the sidelines as they filmed and interviewed several players from the opposing team.
âletâs play ball!â
the crowed roared, claps and whistles ringing through the air as yuji walked out from the dugout, the both of you screaming as the rest of the team followed suit, your shoulders evidently relaxing at the sight of megumi jogging out into position looking absolutely jaw dropping in his clean cut uniform and cap, serious and focused.
as the game ensued, it was no surprise that the boysâ team was absolutely demolishing the opposing players, megumi doing fucking stellar out on the field as he caught ball after ball with his glove, the announcers commentary certainly helping with explaining the context of the game due to your lack of knowledge, but you trying your hardest anyways to understand on your own.
and finally after a while of switching sides and megumi hitting like a greek god, the teams switched sides what seemed like the final time since it was almost the nine inning, his turn to hit.
âwalking up to base now⌠number eighteenâ megumi fushiguro!â
the crowd went fucking insane as he walked up, you immediately standing and screaming over the railing as he took his position up thereâ swinging soft faux hits before properly adjusting his footing on the loose dirt, fans waving around their fushiguro banners or his baseball cards as he settled.
the bags under his eyesâŚ
you gnawed anxiously at your bottom lip. his team was so close to moving on to the league championshipsâŚ
âand the pitcher throwsâŚ.â
hit!
âstrike one!â
megumi screwed his eyes shut and grimaced, shaking his head furiously as he shook the nerves from his body and wiped the sweat from his forehead with his sleeve.
âoh!â the announcers groaned. âlooks like megumi fushiguro missed a hit for the first time in history!â
for the first time?
you whipped your head around to face your girl friend. âfor the first time?â
she looked at you with the same terrorized expression.
âfuck i knew he always hit but i didnât know he never missedâŚâ you whined worriedly. âheâs exhausted man i can see it lookââ
megumiâs footing slightly slipped from the dirt as he positioned himself, getting ready for the next swing.
âand the pitcher throws againâŚâ
hit!
âstrike two!â
âfuck!â megumi roared, walking off the home plate and chucking his bat to the wallâ the wood flying and clattering as it hit the ground, your eyes widening in horror.
âwoah looks like fushiguro got another strike and.. needs to take a breather off the field..?â
âif megumi doesnât get this next hit, theyâre done!â your girl friend shook her head, eyes wide and afraid. âthe other team is gonna take it!â
you ran your fingers through your hair exasperatedly, frantically looking at the scoreboard and back at megumi who was pacing a little off the plate with his head down, his hands on his hips.
âfushiguro!â you spotted yuji yelling from the dugout. âget back on the plate! we could get flagged!â
megumiâs chest heaved as he picked up his bat and wiped off the dirt, walking back over to the home plate and repositioning himself.
cameras flashed and recorded as he tried to get back into focus, news reporters talking their asses off and journalists scribbling god knows whatâ as they just earned themselves their biggest headline of the season.
megumi fushiguro missed his first hit in playing history.
âand the pitcher throwsâŚâ
hit!
âoh there it goes! looks like a fair ball!â
the crowd rallies as megumi books it over the first two bases, everyone watching as the ball hits over the outfield fence as he fucking dashes across the remaining two bases like nothing, earning himself a home runâ
and scoring a spot in the league championship games for his team.
you and your best friend jump for complete joy, throwing your arms around each other and swaying as fans all around you celebrated and cheered just like the both of you, you happily watching the players from the dugout run up and engulf megumi in a group hug, jumping and laughing.
as the crowd began to disperse and take leave, you both quickly ran down the steps and to the field, you immediately spotting megumi and running up to him with your arms out.
âgumi!â
he noticed you and extended his arms, but his face read nothing as you jumped into them.
âgood job good job! you did so amazing!â
ânice fushiguro!â yuji nudged his shoulder. âyou brought us through!â
âi missed the first two hits.â
he set you back down.
yuji shrugged. âso? it happens. i do it all the time! you made a home run and scored us the league.â
megumi only silently nodded, his face to the ground as you told yuji and your best friend that you would see them in the locker rooms with everybody else.
and once everyone had cleared out from the field, you turned to him.
âheyâŚâ you started. âwhatâs wrong?â
his eyes remained glued to the dirt.
âi missed the first two hits.â
your shoulders deflated. âyou heard what yuji said⌠itâs okay. it was bound to happen but itâs fine because you fixed itââ
âwe were on thin fucking ice today.â
his snippy tone took you by surprise a bit.
âyes⌠but you made it...â you responded softly. âyou all pulled through. especially you.â
he scoffed and shook his head, him finally raising his baggy eyes and looking to the side, pissed.
âi almost cost us the league. thatâs what i did.â
âgumiââ you exhaled a frustrated breath. âyou literally played like a machine the entire time and had other hits that were amazing? i donât understand why two little strikesââ
his eyes snapped to yours. âtwo little strikes?â he shook his head again. âtwo strikes too fucking many.â
âwhat is your issue?ââ
âmy issue is that if i fucked up that third hit it wouldâve been all over. we wouldâve lost the division, lost the league, and lost the world series, all because i donât know how to fucking play ballââ
âyes you do! youâre being way too hard on yourself baby you need to take a breather and restââ
âhow many times have you nagged me about that already.â he spat.
you froze.
ânagged?â you repeated softly.
âyes. youâve told me enough times i get it i need rest, i need sleep, i need this i need thatââ
âiâm saying that because look at you!â you motioned with your hands, feeling potential tears prickling at the back of your eyes at the way he was speaking to you. âyour under eyes are dark and purple, your eyes are red you look exhausted!â
âand i told you iâm fine!â he raised his voice a bit. âyou wouldnât understand the shit that i have to do for this team the shit i have to pull and i gave them absolute garbage todayââ
âoh my god megumi!â you snapped. âyour team is a team effort! itâs not just you! youâre not the only one pulling the stops so enough with trying to take on this load and overwork yourself! please you played amazing today everyone was cheering so loud for you andââ
âstop talking.â
you paused.
âjustââ he rubbed his tired eyes and turned to the side. âjust please stop talking.â
stop⌠talking?
he struck a chord, and you felt your heart literally break at his words, an aching heavy pit in your chest as you recounted his yelling and snappiness when all you were trying to do was help him.
thats all youâve ever tried to do for megumi reallyâ help him, support him, and love him. but for him to throw it all back in your face and say you didnât understand? for you to basically shut up?
tears were slipping past your eyes at this point, and when you felt like megumi finally bothered to look at you in the face, his eyes widened and his shoulders dropped.
âbabyââ
âand what about you?â
he stopped. âabout meââ
âyes about you. youâre saying i donât understand anything youâre fucking going through, as if i havenât followed you through your career since the moment we met and before that, like i havenât supported you on the sidelines and asked you question after question about your games just so i can fucking understandââ
âno iââ
you cut him off. âand then youâre hereâ yelling at me, telling me off, and telling me to shut up when iâm the only one fucking standing here with you after the game trying to be there for you?!ââ
âbabyâ fuck iâm sorry okay i didnât meanââ
you laughed bitterly. âyou didnât mean it. didnât mean what? to accidentally let it slip that you actually do think iâm a blabbermouth?â
he was taken aback as his eyebrows furrowed, shaking his head desperately. ânoâ no thatâs not what i meant at all y/n iâm sorry. iâve been so stressed and tired and iâm taking it all out on you right now andâ and thatâs not okay and not an excuse.â
megumi quickly stepped forward and placed his hands on your face, but you pushed him away, hurt flashing across his eyes as you did so.
âand why didnât you tell me about the meeting huh? the one with the higher ups last week?â
surprise crossed his face. âhow did youââ
âdoesnât matter how i heard it. why didnât you tell me? do you understand how that makes me feel when i have to find out through someone else and not my own boyfriend?â
he ran a hand through his spiky black hair and sighed exhaustedly.
âi didnât tell you because i knew you would be upset about it and i didnât want you to worryââ
âso you just chose to keep it from me thatâs real nice.â you spat. âof course i wouldnât be happy with it theyâre stripping you down and exploiting you! how could they say that itâs all on you to bring it home for the world series? do you understand how insane that sounds?â
âi know but i canât tell them anything i just have to say yes!â he explained.
âyou have every right to tell them something! and if you wouldâve communicated this with me like you shouldâve done, i wouldnât have let you lose so much sleep over me and maybe you wouldnât have played the way you think you played, and you wouldnât be standing here shitting all over me!â
he really struck a chord.
ây/nââ
âbye megumi.â
his breath hitched.
ânoâ hey donât do thatââ
he scrambled after you as you made your way out of the field, him quickly catching up and tugging you into him with his long arms around your shoulders, bringing your back to his front as he ducked his face down.
âletâs fix it please we need to fix thisââ
âi want to be alone right now, megumi.â you mumbled.
god he hated how many times youâve called him that already tonight, feeling like the biggest asshole to ever grace your precious life.
âno i donât want you to be upset with me pleaseââ
âwe can talk later on the phone.â your tone was lifeless. âi just need to be alone.â
he faltered, feeling gutting pain cascade all over his body as he hesitantly, slowly, slipped his arms away and released you.
âoâokay.â
he watched you walk up the stands and to the exit as you clutched yourself, his eyes catching the back of your jersey reading his last name that sent an immediate pang through his chest, your frame disappearing from his view and leaving him in his stupid thoughts as he snatched his cap off from his head and threw it to the side in frustration.
that night megumi tried to call you but you didnât pick up, you barely even answering his texts as he wallowed in self pity alone in his apartment.
and you hadnât stopped crying since the moment your tears hit on the fieldâ hurt and exhausted and guilty as you settled into bed, unable to bring yourself to call him and go through with your word, deciding to text instead.
(you): iâm really tired iâm sorry. iâll see if i can call you in the morning.
megumi took no time at all to respond.
(gumi <3): can i take you to class tomorrow?
(you): i donât think thatâs a good idea
he swallowed the lump in his throat and fought back the urge to fight it, wanting to respect you and your space.
but you only kept crying.
(gumi <3): okay
(you): goodnight
(gumi <3): goodnight pretty baby
just as you were about to place your phone back on your nightstand, it buzzed again.
(gumi <3): i love you iâm sorry
you sniffled and put your phone away officially, choosing not to respond.
the following week leading up to the league championship game, megumi spent every waking moment trying to make it up to you, trying to fix it, but you only seemed to stay away from him and distance yourself, something that hurt megumi like no other.
you felt like it was your fault he played the way he did that day. if you had been smarter, more mindful, you wouldâve noticed that the intensity of his exhaustion was extremely abnormal, and perhaps you couldâve done something about it before it was too late and saved yourself the dreadful fight you had with him.
you hated the way you spoke to him, and you fully convinced yourself that you only served as a distraction for him, opting to keeping your distance as far away as possible so it allowed megumi to get his head focused again and ensure a promised route to the world seriesâ something you had hoped to be there to witness, but deeming his success way more important than your needs at this point in time.
so you stopped going to all of his practices following that day, the fact tormenting megumi as you always went to each and every single one and was there for him without faultâ rain or shine, always waiting for him in the locker rooms when he was finished.
but you werenât there anymore. and each day you werenât was another day megumi would spend angry and frustrated with himself that he did what he did. he knew your defense mechanism was pushing people away, and your current behavior gave him flashbacks to the time last year when he was falling for you and you kept running away from him, scaredâ those actions a carbon copy of whatâs happening now, except far worse.
and he did that to you. he yelled at you and snapped at you, told you to stop talking for some fucking reason that he still couldnât find the proper explanation for⌠and he made you cry. so much. your usual sweet honeyed voice you spoke to him with long gone since that day.
and he missed you. more than anything.
âyou stupidââ throw âself absorbedââ throw âassholeââ throw ânarcissisticââ throwâ
âokay thatâs enough thatâs enough!â
yuji pulled your best friend back as she chucked towel after towel at megumi following one of their practices, her absolutely fuming.
he took every hit, not bothering to dodge. he deserved it.
âshe told me what you didââ she shook herself away from yujiâs grip. âwhat the hell is the matter with you? how could you yell at her like that on the field? when all sheâs ever done is love youââ
âi know.â megumi mumbled, rubbing his eyes. âi know iâm really sorry. i regret it.â
âfuck yeah you should,â she scoffed. âthat womanâs been cooped up every day in her room bawling her eyes out over you!â
yuji nodded sadly, and megumi let out a pained breath as he closed his eyes and covered his face with his hands, propping his elbows on his knees, leaning forward.
âfuck meâŚâ
âyeah fuck youââ
âokay! okay. heâs already down let him bleed out.â yuji muttered to her as he rubbed his hands over her arms soothingly, an attempt at calming her down.
he looked at him. âmegumi, you and i both know that she understands you were frustrated that day. the both of you. if you just talk to herââ
âyou think i havenât tried?â megumi picked his head up, and the both of them froze at the way his eyes glossed over.
âiâveâ iâve called her, iâve texted her, i drove by her house but sheâs never there, fuck i even went to her campus at seven in the morning but couldnât find her.â
he took his cap off and roughly rubbed over his eyes again.
your best friend sighed then after a moment, slowly stepping forward and sitting down next to him on the bench.
âsheâll come around megumi.â she mumbled. âjust give her some time. i know itâs hard, but she really really loves you.â she sighed deeply. âsheâll come around.â
megumi nodded solemnly, and yuji stepped forward, patting his shoulder.
âyou okay man?â
he nodded again.
missed phone calls, lagging dry texts, and last minute cancellations from you all happened for a week straight.
and when the time finally came for the league championships, megumi wanted nothing more than for you to be there as he stared at his messy fucking locker when prepping for the gameâ another reminder that you hadnât been around, and another reminder that you wouldnât be here tonight to see him, something he completely did not blame you for.
luckily, the league championship game was at their home base once more, and as the crowd got settled to watch, energies heightened as the players all got settled over the field to play ballâ megumi shook the nerves from his body as he focused with the game, and you, on his mind like a religion.
and as the game ran on with the team scoring run after run, another win was blatantly obvious for themâ megumi entirely unaware of your presence that was watching him the entire time in the stands.
you couldnât help yourself. you needed to be there to watch him, needed to see him take home another achievement like that, regardless of where you both stood as you watched from just above the v.i.p section, shivering like an idiot because you forgot to bring a jacket after deciding to wear a flowy tube top for the day, but excited for him nonetheless.
you didnât tell a single soul you were coming, not even your best friend as you just wanted to see megumi again before running off into the shadows of your embarrassing despair, missing him like fucking crazy and nearly sobbing when you saw him walk out on the field at the start, but even more emotional to the fact that they were actually going to move on to the world series by the looks of it.
and the crowd hollered eventually as the speakers blasted megumiâs teams signature songâ
finalizing their spot in the world series.
your eyes glowed as you watched his team run up on the field and tackle each other down, literally rolling in the dirt as you giggled to yourselfâ sighing contently and about to turn and walk out of the stadium to go home when a strong rough hand wrapped around your bare upper arm.
âyouâre fushiguroâs girl! arenât you?â
you snapped your head up and saw someone you recognized as one of megumiâs crew members for the team, and you relaxed, trusting him.
âoh! yeah i am!â
âsweet! i just got hired to be on the crew a couple of weeks ago.â
âthatâs great!â you answered politely, smiling. âhow isââ
âlisten i was wondering if i could get any tickets to the world series from you?â
what.
âumââ your eyes darted around awkwardly. âforâ for the world series?ââ
âyeah! i took this job so i could get some but apparently i need to be working longer than three weeks. dumb.â
you gnawed at the inside of your cheek as your eyes drifted downward to your arm.
he still hadnât let go.
âoh iâm sorry.â you mumbled. âi couldâ i could maybe get you one? one for sure!â
he shook his head. âshit sorry, i need like five.â
âfive?!â you gawked. âi canât get you five iâm really sorry⌠i can only maybe get you one.â
his eyes narrowed. âwhy not? youâre fushiguroâs girl are you not?â
âyes but what does that have to do with me getting you tickets to the world series?â you spoke nervously, trying to put on a brave front as his height literally towered over you.
âwhy donât you ask him for tickets? heâs literally megumi fushiguro iâm sure he can cough up someââ
you scoffed.
âiâm not gonna ask him anything for you just because you want to use me to get tickââ
âso then what the fuck are you with him for?â his grip tightened around your arm as he pulled you a little, and you winced.
âlet go of me!ââ
megumi considered himself a relatively calm person throughout his life.
he knew he had his explosive rude moments here and there, him also accidentally offending people unknowingly with his words, but that behavior only stayed on the field as it pertained to the game at hand or with baseball itself, his life outside of that a treasured tranquil one as he spent his days with you and only you, something he looked forward to every waking moment since the day he met you.
but as he heard your little voice through the yelling of the crowd, instantly recognizing it and picking up on its distressed demeanorâ his body did a full one-eighty as his eyes frantically searched for you through the mass of people.
and once he did spot you? your breathtaking little self being manhandled by some fucking moron who had his hand around your upper arm?
he didnât consider himself a relatively calm person anymore.
megumi quickly snatched his cap off and passed it to a confused yuji and your best friend, sprinting at the speed of light across the field and to the fence of the v.i.p. section before hoisting himself up and climbing, jumping over once he reached the top and landing on the standsâ him running up a few steps before finally reaching you and tearing the guy off.
âget the fuck off.â
he gently pushed you behind him, his chest heaving.
âthe shit are you doing hurting her arm like that for huh?!â megumi stepped forward.
âhey! hey iâm sorry man iâ i didnât know i was hurting herââ
âsure you fucking did she was literally telling you to let go and you were throwing her around likeââ
âmegumi pleaseââ
âare you part of the crew?â
âyâyeah?â
âyouâre gone. youâre fired youâreââ
âwait iâm sorry! i was just trying to get tickets to the world seriesââ
megumiâs eyes blew open, wild and infuriated.
âthatâs why you were grabbing her like that? you were harrassing her for some fucking tickeâ you know whatââ
megumi stepped forward before you could stop him as he reeled his fist back and knocked him straight in the jaw, the guy stumbling back a bit and the crowd gasping before megumi spun around and grabbed your legs, throwing you over his shoulder.
âget the fuck out of my way.â
the small crowd that stuck around for the altercation parted with no questions asked, his long legs striding over across the exit and to the teams now vacant locker roomâ kicking the door open before gently setting you down on your feet.
he ran his hands over your soft hair frantically as he grabbed your cheeks and checked you over, your teary doe eyes breaking him apart.
âhey are you okay? are you fine?â
megumi let go of your face and gently lifted your upper arm, his eyes hardening at the purple forming bruise from that dickwads hand.
âheâs gone heâs goneââ
you lunged and wrapped your arms around his waist tightly as he started to charge back out, pulling him back.
âno! stop itâs okay you already hit him i think he got the message.â you mumbled, letting him go.
megumi turned to you then, his eyes softening over your timid sad frame as you played with your fingers, gaze down.
ây/n.â
âhm?â
he frowned.
âcan you please look at me.â
you listened reluctantly and peered up at him.
he exhaled. âbaby iâ iâm sorry. iâm so fucking sorry for everything that i said to you that night. i meant none of it. nothing. i was just angry at myself and stressed and stupid and i hate that i talked to you like that and took it out on you. you didnât deserve that at all.â
you hurriedly wiped your silent tearsâ nodding, but saying nothing.
he leaned down to look at you at eye level.
âare you okay?â
you nodded again and sniffled.
âtalk baby.â he pleaded with you gently, eyes sad. âtell me, please.â
you cowered a little as you finally broke into tiny sobs, your hands hovering over your face to hide your tears as he placed his big hands on your upper arms, megumi feeling like he just got run over by an entire military tank at the sight of you crying because of him.
âiâiâm sorry i yelled at youââ you hiccuped. âi was so mean and i fâfeel really badââ
âbaby why are you apologizing?â he shook his head. âitâs me itâs all me iâm the one who was mean to youââ
âno butââ you sniffled. âyou were just stressed from the game like you said and thatâs fine i shouldâve been more aware. i didnât mean to upset you with me talkingââ
âoh pretty baby..â he breathed out, agonizingly, megumi literally beating himself up. âremember when i said one time you were too nice for your own good?â
you nodded.
âthis is one of those moments. you should be yelling at me and throwing things at me like your best friend did.â
your eyebrows furrowed as you sniffled. âsheâ she did?â
âshe did.â he nodded. ârightfully so.â
you giggled a little, and he smiled softly.
âiâm sorry i distanced myself the way i didâŚâ you mumbled, a waterfall of tears coming down again. âi just thought that i was a distraction andâ and i wanted you to focus.â
âa distraction?â he murmured. ây/n you are never a distraction.â
âno but at the end of the day i wasâŚâ you sobbed. âyou need to be there for your team you haveââ hic! âyou have responsibilities and i donât want you to put me above that andâ and keep hanging out with me when you have so much to doââ
âsomething you need to understand is that iâm replaceable.â he cut you off, tone firm. âthe minute they find some other dude thatâs way better than me and quicker than me and they draft his ass over to the team? they are going to replace me faster than you will ever think. thatâs just the way jobs are. iâm replaceable no matter how much you wanna think itâs not true.â
he shook his head, his face pained. âbut you are not. youâre not fucking replaceable there is no other you. you are my life now baby. yes my career is a priority, but so are you, and i would rather them replace me than lose you entirely.â
he wiped the tears from your cheeks, your doe eyes wide.
âi appreciate that you care so much and you support me and that you want me to devote all of my time to only thisâ youâre an angel on earth for all of that⌠but as your man iâm telling you that all of my time is devoted to you now, not just baseball.â
you wrapped your arms around his neck and tugged him closer to you, tight, him immediately reciprocating and snaking his arms around your waist.
he could finally breathe.
âdo you understand?â he murmured softly, rubbing his hands over your back soothingly.
you nodded.
âbut you canâtâ wear yourself out like you did okay?â you sniffled. âyou canât let them push you and tire you out⌠and please listen when we say for you to restâŚâ
âi know iâm sorry. iâll listen next time baby i promise.â
âi get you trying to improve for yourself and push your limits⌠butâ but thereâs a difference between wanting to better your play and straight up wearing yourself down.â
you pulled back a little to look at him, wiping your tears and hiccuping. âand i worry man⌠i worry so much because iââ hic! âi love you and i always think about if youâre eating right orâ or getting enough sleepââ
his heart literally melted as he felt the remains of it ooze and spread all over his body and insides, your pure sweet concerns tugging at him and turning him into absolute putty before you.
he tightened his grip around your waist and lifted you, gently rocking your bodies as you sniffled and cried, his eyes screwed shut and feeling every possible emotion a human being could ever feel⌠but feeling love most of all.
love for you. love for who you are.
megumi kissed your wet cheek delicately and let his lips linger there as he spoke.
âiâm in love with youâŚâ he murmured. âi hope you know that.â
your heart fluttered and you nodded, a little smile playing at your face.
âiâm in love with you too gumi.â you hummed, pressing a sweet kiss of your own to his cheek.
he set you back down and cupped your cheeks, slowly leaning in and pressing light tender kisses to your lips, his mouth completely savoring over the taste of yours as he had been deprived of them for a freaking weekâ feeling like his dried up soul had been rejuvenated and made anew.
and you felt the same way⌠because you deepened the kiss, picked up the pace, pulled him closer until his chest was flush against yours and your hot breaths were mixed together in a misty cloud, megumi breathing heavily through his nose as he ran his needy desperate hands over your delicious body.
he trailed wet open mouthed kisses on your cheek, jaw, and all the way down to the side of your exposed neck, his hand supporting the other side as he feverishly licked a slow long stripe of spit up your neck with his rough tongue, your fists gripping the sides of his jersey as he nibbled and bit, his lips finally coming to enclose and suck around a certain spot as your breath hitched at how frenzied and sloppy he was being, drool practically running down your neck as he ravished, bit, and sucked over multiple areas.
you shoved your hands down his pants suddenly, and he choked in surprise as his hips thrusted forward, your fingers pumping and palming his hardened cock slowly as his breath shuddered against your neck.
âbaby...â he murmured.
âhm?â
âhow would you feel if i turned on the shower and fucked my cock in your pretty little cunt for a bit in there huh?âŚâ
a needy whimper slipped past your lips against his ear, and he grew weak.
âis that okayââ
âmore than okayââ
you squealed as he wasted no time in picking you up again and walking over to the showers, the both of you clumsily tearing off your clothes as megumi fumbled with the shower switch until luke warm water spritzed from aboveâ entrapping the both of you in a humid trance as megumi squeezed your bare thighs and ushered you to jump, you doing so immediately and wrapping your legs around his waist.
he stepped in and literally slammed the shower door shut, the two of you giggling a little as the soothing water washed over your panting bodies, the sight of his handsome bright face making your cheeks flush and bury your face in his neck in response.
he chuckled softly, gently setting your back against the wet tile wall before kissing you again and again, his mouth messy against your puffy lips as he tried to drink up all that you gave him, the tip of his cock slipping past your folds and brushing against your swollen clitâ each time making you squeak and jump.
you didnât care about anything, your mind reeling and just wanting megumiâs dick inside of you as soon as possible, knowing that youâd never really had sex before and literally not giving a single shit because it was himâ someone you trusted the most out of anyone in your life, and someone you wanted to give your all to no matter the circumstance.
he lined his fat tip then against your drooling hole.
âwait! wait the doorââ you gripped his shoulders for support. âthe door did you lock it?â
ânope.â
megumi pushed his cock in slowly and gently, your choked gasps and moans echoing inside the shower as his head fell to rest in the crook of your hickey covered neck, him groaning in ecstasy as your gummy warm pussy strangled his dick to the tightest degree, already previously so wet and gushy that it thankfully barely hurt you at all as he bottomed out.
âfuuuckkâ youâre warm.â he murmured, gripping your hips like a vice and softly caressing his thumb against your slippery skin to soothe youâ hoping (but not really), youâd maybe release the clutch your pussy had on his dick to stop him from already shooting his cum all over your insides like a loser.
he slowly drew his hips back and fucked into you again, you jolting at the force as you fumbled to keep your grip steady on his shoulders, his cock fucking thick and massive as his little curve poked deliciously at your cervix, him gradually increasing his pace as you shuddered over the quick pat pat patâs echoing through the walls.
âgâgumiii..â you whined.
âwhat baby?â he mumbled breathlessly, his eyes glued to where his dick connected with your hole as it slipped in and out lewdly, your pussy literally squelching and screaming for him with your bouncing tits in his face that made him clench his jaw in self restraintâ trying his hardest not to fucking ram into you like nothing and take you.
âyâyouâre biigg!â you hiccuped, your little gasps of breath enticing droplets of cum to leak out of his tip and ooze out of your little wet folds, megumi moaning at your words.
âyeah?â pat pat patâ âsâtoo much for you baby?â
he picked up the pace, on purpose as he meanly bounced you on his cock and shot his hips up against your pussy, his big heavy balls slapping against your ass and making your eyes fucking cross at the feeling.
âtell me you love me.â he panted. ânow.â
âiââ hic! âi love youââ
megumi grabbed your cheeks with his fingers and mushed them together, grinning deviously at the way your pouty lips pushed out cutely.
âhow much.â
âsâso- ah!â so much gumiââ
âmoreâ shit!â he choked, a particular squeeze from your abused cunt almost making him finish. âmâ more than anything?â
slap slap slapâ
âyâyes!ââ you could barely even speak due to the erotic hold he had on your face. âi love you i love you i loveââ
you squealed as he let go of your face, gave into his desires and rammed into you, both hands on your bruised hips as he gave your pussy no room to breathe with how fast he was shoving his fat cock inside of you, pounding and pummeling into your guts as your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you felt your release build up in your tummy.
âwhy were you asking me about the door earlier huh?â he panted. âyou donât want anyone to see how much of aâ thrust! âslut you are? your legs spread for me like this and your pretty pussy creaming on my dick?â
you whined and moaned so fucking loudly, it ringing through megumiâs ears like a wicked symphony.
he pinched your nipple when you didnât respond.
âanswer me.â
thrust thrust thrustâ
ânâno i didnât!â
âno?â
he gripped your neck and sloppily ran his mouth over yours, feeling his cum on the brink of shooting out.
âmâgonna cum inside.â
âinâ mmphf!â inside?â
âyou donât want it?â he let go of your neck. âcause i wonât give it to you if you donât want itââ
âi do i do!â you scrambled and cupped his cheeks, bringing his lips back in and kissing him messily.
âgive it to me gumi please!ââ hic! âeeekkk!â
hot sticky cum pumped out of his tip and into your gushy walls, your high making your toes curl as you creamed around his heavy cock feverishly, megumiâs entire body fucking shivering at the way your pussy felt like it was entirely made and molded for him.
he softly pumped himself inside and out of you, his mouth hung open in a daze as he watched his white cum slide out of your pretty hole and over his still connected dick, gently easing out after a minute and carefully setting you back downâ not completely though, as he knew youâd be sore as he leaned most if not all of your body weight against him.
you held each other in a tight embrace then, your heavy breaths trying to find its normal rhythm as the warm water continued to cascade down your bodies, comfortingly.
âwhy donât we have sex more often...â you mumbled.
he laughed softly, pecking the side of your head. âi was waiting for you to tell me baby. i didnât want to pressure you.â
âi was waiting for you to tell me.â you emphasized. âi didnât want to jump on you and just violate youââ
megumiâs chest vibrated as he laughed again, a cute boyish one that made you bite your lip.
âviolate me?â he murmured, an amused smile on his face. âiâd want you to.â
âyeah?â you tilted your head, and his cheeks grew hot.
âyeah.â
finally you and megumi were in sync again, going back into each otherâs routines as if the week long hiccup never happened, the both of you officially unraveling the aching knots in your chests that you hauled for seven tormenting days straightâ together and attached to the hip once again as he started picking you up for your seven am classes every morning like before, you going to his practices straight after, and spending your hours sleeping in his dark cozy room this time around, snoring your little life away so megumi could recover.
and eventually, the world series arrived.
âmy camera! my camera! my digital one did i bring it?!â
you flipped your purse upside down and dumped all of your things on the floorâ your lip combo, compact mirror, snacks, random receipts, and small perfume bottle rolling around on the ground until your digital camera was finally in view.
your best friend cackled as she crouched down and helped you pick up your things. âyou were taking pictures up megumiâs nose on the two hour drive over here yes you brought itââ
âi know i forgot iâm so nervous what if they lose what if someone fumbles what ifââ
you both stood as you rambled on and she placed both of her hands on your shoulders, shaking you. âcalm down! theyâll be fine! win or lose they still made it to the world series!â
the crowd roared much like the past two games, except much heavier, louder, more drilling as the music drummed through your body, the air windy but refreshing, and high pitched whistles echoing from around the stadium as everyone anticipated for the biggest game of the season.
you had lost count how many different news stations were here broadcasting the game, how many reporters you saw scrambling across the field trying to interview certain playersâ you too busy taking pictures of every single little thing and the both of you reapplying your lip liners over a million fucking timesâ even flagging down a crew member so you could take a picture with just your best friend, your backs to the camera showcasing the last names of your boyfriendâs on your jerseyâs.
and when the game officially commenced and the players all went out on the fieldâ megumi and his team did what they always do best, taking control of the scoreboard and earning runs like chump change as they worked professionally to take the trophy home, you constantly snapping pictures of megumi that your digital camera ran out of fucking storage before you even got the shot that you wanted.
eventually after a while of playing, it was megumiâs turn to hit.
âfuck! record for me please record! my camera ran out of storage oh my god use my phone please i love youââ
your best friend laughed as she took your phone from you and did what you asked, your hands on the railing and leaning over it as you anxiously watched him walk up to home plate and take position.
but instead of doing his usual faux swings and repositioned footing, megumi stepped to the side and turned his bat downward, you unable to tell what he was doing as his frame was blocking, his arm moving in various directions before he stepped back again on the home plate and repositioned himself.
your eyes trailed to the ground.
megumi had carved your initials in the dirt.
your girl friend gasped and cooed. ây/nnn!â
as megumi now did his faux swings, your bottom lip only wobbled as your eyes stayed trained to the carvings in the dirt, your heart skipping a thousand beats per minute as the thought of megumi thinking about you out there during one of the most important nights of his life, made you question repeatedly how you ever landed a man like him when all you do is talk and cry.
hit!
your eyes snapped up and you quickly wiped the corners of your eyes, megumi already running across the first two bases as the crowd roared.
âbring it home fushiguro!â
several of his teammates were cheering him on from the dugout, megumi running four runs with just one fucking hit?â
a grand slam.
and suddenly you were taken back to the day you noticed megumi for the first time, just like now with your doe eyes wide and cheeks pink, recognizing the only piece of baseball terminology you knew besides a home run.
except then he was just a stranger you were hopelessly in love with that knew how to play ball like no other.
now though, heâs a man you couldnât ever imagine your life without. and you didnât want to.
so as the game reached nine innings, megumiâs team running on the field in a bundle of absolute tears and yells and hollers that they won the world fucking series, all clustering together as they hoisted several players up on their shoulders, including megumiâ
you and your best friend instantly booked it down there in a fit of tears.
you had no time to get your personal belongings together as you sprinted across the field like your life fucking depended on it towards megumiâ him being put down by his teammates and him frantically looking around after until he spotted you, the brightest smile spreading across his face as he chucked his cap to the side and opened his arms out wide for you.
you jumped in and he spun you around, holding you tight as the screaming crowd surrounding you drowned itself out as you cried into megumiâs neck.
he pulled back, panting.
âdid you see how i did a grand slam?â
you nodded rapidly.
âi did it because i knew its the only thing you would recognize!â he yelled over the noise. âso you would feel included when we won!â
oh my god.
he still remembered when you told him that?
âguummiii! how did you even calculate that?!â you cried harder, and he laughed as he spread tiny kisses all over your teary face, his eyes glimmering with absolute unadulterated happiness and bliss, the reality of having the two things he wanted most in life settling into his mind.
megumi didnât really have a stance on religionâ whether the factor is real or not something he didnât really care about nor mind as he simply just chose to live.
but as he held you on the field, you crying for him and embracing him the way that you were, kissing him the way that you were, megumi only wanted to be covered in your favor. megumi only wanted to devote his entire life to you.
megumi only wanted to believe in you.
â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘
want more? you can find my mlb!megumi fushiguro masterlist here!
taglist!! <33 (THANK YOU THANK YOU!):
@cupcaketeddybehr @soobiary @roachfun @waterfal-ling @saebaey @hiraethwa @luvvmae @cake-with-the-cream @pixie-dix @vividl3ss
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#yuta okkotsu#gojo satoru#jjk fanfic#jjk x you#geto suguru#geto suguru x reader#gojo satoru x reader#jjk fluff#megumi fluff#megumi x you#jjk megumi#megumi fushiguro#megumi x reader#jujutsu kaisen megumi#jjk yuuta#jjk geto#jjk gojo#jjk x reader#jjk smut#yuji itadori#nanami kento x reader#jujutsu kaisen suguru#jujutsu megumi#choso x reader#choso kamo#jjk yuji#gojo x you#gojo fluff
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distracted a bit during the matt baume howard ashman video by more [lsoh inherent irreconciliability in an effort to nail down an audrey ii metaphor vs audrey ii's figurative core is Literal] thoughts b/c of that "personal preference for the stage musical ending b/c if not then murder is okay" like That's Right. the murders are okay
#deleting tags in which i start to go on about it but tl;dr the murders are okay. au w/no audrey ii like Still#the heartwarming tale of two people like oh we both wanna live together? hooray for pooling our money. now let's kill orin#guess mr. mushnik would just close up shop like well so long as you let seymour go then won't Have to kill you too. but watch out#interesting like guess i was dimly aware of the different Commercially Backed bway trend of the '80s#but it's so Something like ''there has to be spectacle'' where nowadays spectacle is Always a bad word like. it's okay#as well as that if it's not [takes notes: term: integrated musical] it's bad like. i think musicals can be whatever / many things#obviously the throughline is the [commercial vs creative interests] but you know. it's okay#going ''starlight express is all about trains? wadda'' but then taking 5 sec to remember like Okay. Sure. what problem do i have (none)#also allowed myself like ''what serendipitous timing. imagine a quick clips montage of lsoh productions & the guthrie one features''#like look at this audrey ii. however i was like that's not going to happen. and it didn't#and i have yet to listen to guthrie lsoh hands behind my back standing at window
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David Oyelowo Kallus means the world to me and I would readily sacrifice my sixty part fic series' accuracy to have this become a reality
Also god fucking damn it Nicki how did you manage to make him this sexy jesus fucking christ đđŚ
May the 4th be with you and LET DAVID OYELOWO PLAY KALLUS IN LIVE ACTION GODDAMMIT
#star wars#alexsandr kallus#david oyelowo#I don't care how many times I've had Zeb refer to Kallus's golden eyes and hair#let David play him Disney#his voice acting as Kallus is absolutely incredible and he deserves to bring him to live in person as well#also I love how his hair is military short as an Imperial but then naturally curly as a rebel#listen fr I hope Dave Filoni or Jon Favreau or whomever is in charge of the next Star Wars series takes notes of this#because you nailed his look PERFECTLY#literally there is not a thing I would change or even adapt
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the complete knock â bob reynolds



⢠synopsis. youâre only here to try and understand why buckyâs suddenly gone off the rails and joined a new team, leaving you, sam and joaquĂn in radio silence. the last thing you expected was to find comfort in a stranger. a kind stranger named bob.
⢠contains. spoilers for thunderbolts*, takes place during the 14 month later period. nothing too crazy, mostly plot. reader is described as female. bob is a cutie!! reader and joaquĂn are sambucky children of divorce :(
⢠wc: 9.7k+
⢠authorâs note. wrote this with a vague idea and a dream. i don't know. don't ask pls.
You were here strictly for business.
The lobby was all polished glass, military-grade charm, and propaganda dressed in gold. Cameras flashed like fireworks along the crimson carpet, catching every inch of shine from designer suits and sharp smiles. A towering digital screen looped the promo again: "The New Avengers: Built for Tomorrow." You watched from the fringe as the montage played, the images slicing together in quick successionâJohn Walker throwing the shield with over-practised precision, Yelena Belova dismantling a room of dummies in under twelve seconds, and Ava Starr phasing through a concrete wall with a smirk. Hero shots. Sanitized. Manufactured. All of them.
You didnât blink as you were ushered to an elevator.
Growing up, the Avengers Tower never really felt real to you. Sure, youâd seen the photos, the documentaries, the endless footage of press conferences held on its front steps. Hell, youâd even walked past it with your parents whenever you visited New Yorkâbut it still felt like it belonged to another world entirely. Untouchable. Almost mythic.
You never imagined youâd walk inside.
And yet now, riding the elevator up with a slow-climbing hum and nerves that prickled beneath your skin, all you felt was dread.
It was a strange kind of emptinessâthe feeling of finally reaching something you once admired, only to realize it had been gutted and repainted in someone elseâs image. The marble floors had been waxed clean, but the history here wasnât. You could still feel the ghosts under the polish. Somewhere between the seams of the rebuilt walls and reprogrammed elevators, there was once a legacy. Real one. But it didnât belong to the people in charge of this event.
You were crammed in with a handful of Congress members and defence contractors, all of whom smelled like cologne and quiet greed. Congressman Gary was there too, smiling too much, already half-drunk from the limo ride there. (He said it would be the only way heâd survive an entire night listening to people praise Valentina Allegra de Fontaine). Gary had been the one to suggest your attendance might smooth things over. It might make the New Avengers feel like someone from Samâs camp was willing to listen. Get on their good sideâthat whole thing.
But you were here for an entirely different reason. His invitation was exactly what you needed to get in, though.
Underneath your gownâsleek, formal, and designed to draw no conclusionsâyou had a mic stitched into the seam of your strapless bodice. Hidden, but live. Your earpiece buzzed softly with JoaquĂnâs voice, casual as ever.
âIf Sam finds out weâre doing this, weâre so dead.â
You bit the inside of your cheek, trying not to be overheard as the elevator operator gave a rehearsed speech about the towerâs restorationâhow it stood now as a symbol of âunity, rebirth, and strength.â You resisted the urge to roll your eyes. The tower didnât feel like a symbol. It felt like a stage.
âHeâll take away your wings at most,â you murmured, gaze fixed forward. âRelax.â
You could practically hear JoaquĂn pouting through the comms.
âI just got them back.â
âThen letâs not make a scene. Gary said itâd be good optics to have someone on our side here. Weâre doing Sam a favour.â A pause. Then, quieter: âIâm surprised you didnât want to come with me. Youâre cleared for field work.â
âNo, thanks. As much as I adore red carpet politics, I donât think I can be in the same room as de Fontaine without committing a felony. Might get myself in trouble.â
âAnd I wonât?â
âYouâre better at smiling.â
âYouâve never seen me smile.â
âExactly.â
You exhaled through your nose, the tiniest edge of a grin forming before you could stop it.
âJust... try not to piss anyone off for five minutes, yeah?â
You didnât answer. The elevator chimed. The doors slid open with a muted ding, and you stepped into a wall of flashing lights and artificial warmth.
The event space had been reconstructed on the upper floors, a showroom designed to impress donors and government officials alike. White marble floors stretched endlessly beneath towering banners that hung from the ceilings like monuments. Each one bore the new emblem of the teamâsleek and stylized, but hollow. You could see the press eating it up already.
A digital display behind the podium read:
WELCOME TO THE FUTURE.
MEET EARTHâS NEWEST MIGHTIEST HEROES.
Your stomach turned.
âYou still with me?â JoaquĂn asked.
âYeah.â You nodded once, moving deeper into the room as your eyes scanned the crowd for familiar faces. âIâm here.â
âIâm gonna need camera access,â he said. âThereâs a chip tucked under the gem on your bracelet. If you can slide that into an outlet somewhere, Iâll be able to map out the floorâs electrical system. Should help me locate the control room.â
âGuy in the chair,â you muttered, lips twitching into a faint grin. It was impressiveâhis gadgets, his confidence. Typical JoaquĂn.
Congressman Gary had vanished into the crowd, but you didnât mind. Better alone than attached to a man who introduced you as a pet project. You plucked a glass of champagne from a passing tray, the cold stem grounding in your fingers, and sidestepped toward the edge of the room.
An outlet revealed itself by a floor-length curtain. You knelt, as if adjusting your heel, and casually broke the gem from your bracelet, slipping it into the socket with practiced ease.
âOkay,â JoaquĂn said, voice clearer now. âGive me a minute to get my bearings. While Iâm working on this, try not to look like a loser in the corner. Mingle or something.â
You scoffed under your breath. âEasy for you to sayâyou can talk anyoneâs ear off.â
âYou calling me annoying?â
âYeah.â
âWow. Go see if you can find Bucky while I work on this, would you?â
Right. Bucky Barnes.
You werenât here to mingle. You werenât here to sip champagne or shake hands or sweet-talk your way into the New Avengersâ good graces. You were here for Sam. And more specificallyâfor Bucky. Wherever the hell he was hiding.
The plan was simple enough in theory: Get a read on what Valentina was playing at. Try to talk to Bucky. Get ahead of whatever fallout was brewing between him and Sam before it turned into a full-blown civil war again. Youâd offered to go because no one else would.
JoaquĂn was trying to stay neutral (and failing). Isaiah had dismissed Bucky as a long-lost white man with too many ghosts. And Sam refused to speak to Bucky since the news broke about the New Avengers. And Bucky hadnât said a damn word back.
So here you were. You were the only one left who might still be able to stand in the space between them without setting off alarms, even if you were biased.
You still didnât understand how Bucky could do it. How he could go from testifying before Congress about accountability and reform, to standing beside Valentina Allegra de Fontaine like she hadnât personally undone everything theyâd fought for. Like he hadnât been there when Ross tried to throw his friends all in cells. (Sure, you weren't there for it either, but Sam told you all about it; the accords were one of the reasons the Avengers broke up.)
Valentina wasnât just dangerousâshe was calculated. Clever. The kind of dangerous that worked in the shadows, smiling for cameras while quietly tying strings around peopleâs necks. She had her ex-husband arrested, sabotaged Wakandan outreach missions, and picked through the wreckage of post-blip heroes like she was drafting a fantasy football team. The fact that she now had a unit of enhanced individuals marching under her payroll and calling themselves the New Avengers made your stomach turn.
And Bucky was one of them.
You believed Valentina was guilty the second Bucky first mentioned sheâd recruited John Walker. Walkerâwho had murdered a man in public, with blood still wet on the shieldâand somehow walked free. Charges vanished. Headlines redirected. Now he was being repackaged as a hero again, and Bucky was standing next to him like nothing had happened.
You couldnât wrap your head around it. No matter how many angles you looked at it from, it didnât make sense. And the more you thought about it, the more it burned in your chest.
What was he thinking?
Why hadnât he said anything?
Why wasnât he here?
You pulled in a slow breath as you stepped further into the room, letting the sound of clinking glasses and diplomatic small talk wash over you like static.
The room was grand in a gaudy wayâshiny surfaces and marble floors that reflected the chandelier light too harshly. Everything screamed polished excess, like they were trying to distract from the blood under the polish.
You tried to scan the crowd for Bucky, but there were too many faces, too many government suits and PR smiles, none of them him. You told yourself that when you did find Bucky, heâd have some kind of explanationâsomething to loosen the knot in your chest, something that could push down the rising anxiety. Something that could explain how the man you once trusted was now parading around in a suit under Valentinaâs thumb.
Instead, you found Congressman Gary. Or rather, he found you.
He was already three glasses of champagne deepâfive, if you counted the shots youâd seen him down on the wayâand he beamed like heâd found a shiny toy in a sea of suits.
âThere she is,â he said, slinging an arm around your shoulder like you hadnât just been avoiding him for fifteen minutes. âYou have got to meet some of these people. Big names. Big wallets.â
You were too polite to shrug him off, even as he dragged you into a circle of De Fontaineâs investors. Their grins were just a little too sharp, their eyes a little too eager. The way they looked at you made your skin crawl, like you were a chess piece they hadnât quite decided how to play yet.
You smiled tightly. Shook clammy hands. Answered vague questions. Nodded while they spoke about âopportunities,â ârebuilding legacy,â and ârebranding heroism.â
One man leaned in closer, his breath thick with bourbon. âYou know,â he said, voice oily, âwith your background, youâd be a perfect candidate for the new team. Valentina has a real eye for talent, and weâre building something bigger than what came before. Something better. You could help shape it from the inside.â
You swallowed your disgust with a sip of champagne. âIâm not really looking to join anything right now.â That was a lie. You already had a seat in the team Sam was putting together. But he did not need to know that.
He chuckled, as if that wasnât an answer.
âOkay, Iâve got eyes,â JoaquĂn said suddenly in your ear. His voice broke through the haze like a rope thrown across stormy water.
You exhaled in relief. âExcuse me,â you told the group, already turning away. âI need to grab a drink.â
They nodded, already moving on to the next opportunity in heels. Gary wasnât too happy, though.
You drifted from the circle, walking slowly toward the open bar. On the way, you passed a tray of themed hors dâoeuvresâtiny âAvengerâ sliders with edible logos, cupcakes shaped like shields and guns.
A mounted camera in the corner caught your eye, its red light blinking lazily above a velvet-draped sculpture.
âSee me?â you muttered.
âYeah, I see you,â JoaquĂn replied.
âStill no sign of Barnes.â
âScanning crowd pings now,â he said. âEither heâs ghosting the place or he got another haircut and I canât recognize him. Which would be so like him, by the way.â
You sighed and accepted another drink from a passing server, something dry and too expensive, and kept moving.
You figured youâd shaken at least six hands tonight that belonged to people whoâd love to see your head on a stickâif not for the lucrative optics of you standing here at all. You were an opportunity to them. A symbol. A bargaining chip in a war they didnât even understand.
Your dress caught suddenly.
You stumbledâonly a step, but enough for the chilled drink to slosh dangerously near the edge of the glass. You turned on instinct, hand rising to fix the silk scarf that had slipped from your neck and shoulder.
A man stood behind you, wide-eyed, hand half-raised like heâd been about to catch you.
âIâIâm so sorry,â he stammered. His voice was low, a subtle rumble barely audible over the layers of clinking glass, conversation, and ambient music. ââstepped on your dress. Sorry.â
You blinked, caught off guard.
He looked like he didnât belong here. Not in the way the others did. No glossy name tag, no designer smugness. His suit was clean, but not flashy. Understated.
âItâs fine,â you said quickly, instinctively adjusting your scarf where it had slipped from your shoulder. You shook out the fabric of your dress around the ankles, heart skipping in the echo of that voice. Something about the way he said itâapologetic, soft, like he genuinely meant itâcaught you off guard.
âSorry,â he mumbled again, even quieter this time, eyes dropping to the floor. His dark hair fell over his face, almost like he was trying to shrink three sizes. You could hear a faint, awkward laugh in his voice. âUhm⌠yeah. Sorry.â
He didnât linger. Just turned and slipped back into the crowd before you could even process anything. No second glance. Just a gentle pivot and a few long strides back into the crowd, swallowed instantly by the sea of shoulder pads, press passes, and sharp perfume.
You stood there for a second, staring after him.
He moved differently from the others. No performative swagger. No politicianâs posture. No tray in his hand, so heâs definitely not a server. He was quiet in a way that made you feel like youâd imagined him, like heâd only brushed through this reality for a second before vanishing into another.
You didnât recognize him.
And you should have.
For all the files youâd scoured, the profiles and photos, the research youâd buried yourself in to prepare for tonight, youâd made it your job to know every player in this room. Who to watch. Who to avoid. Who might be useful.
But not him.
You turned back toward the bar, but your mind didnât follow. Not entirely.
Who the fuck was that?
You were just about to ask JoaquĂn to pull a facial scan when something in your periphery stopped you cold.
John Walker.
He was only a few steps away, mid-conversation with some high-level sponsor, until his gaze landed on you. And then he froze.
The look that crossed his face was quick, recognition, discomfort, maybe a flicker of guilt, but he buried it just as fast, turning away without a word. He pivoted like a man avoiding a ghost, ignoring the way the sponsor he spoke to called after him.
âWalker just made a hard left into the hors dâoeuvres,â JoaquĂn muttered in your ear, low and amused. âYou see that?â
You exhaled, more irritated than surprised. âWeâre not here for him.â
âYeah. I think he knows that too. Thatâs why heâs pretending heâs got important shrimp to eat.â
That pulled a faint smile from you, biting down the urge to laugh.
Typical. The last time youâd seen Walker in person, he was seated in a courtroom with his jaw clenched so tight you thought heâd snap a molar. Youâd testified in his case, alongside Sam, Bucky, and everyone else who had to witness what happened in Madripoorâwhat he did to that man in the square. The shield, slick and red. The silence afterward, heavier than any explosion.
You never fought him. Never had to. But you'd been on opposite sides of that mess, and he knew it. Hell, youâd spoken directly to his discharge. Your words were probably still echoing in the back of his skull.
The way he turned away just now⌠yeah. He remembered you.
âIâm surprised he didnât start barking about national security,â JoaquĂn quipped in your ear again. âDo you think we should trail him?â
You hesitated. You didnât want to. Just the idea of following in Walkerâs smug footsteps made your jaw clench.
But JoaquĂn pressed, âHe might know where Bucky is.â
And that was the problemâhe was right. And you hated how much sense it made. Of course, Walker would know. You also hate how Walker and Bucky were probably friends now.
A camera flash caught your eye, and you instinctively straightened your posture, smoothed your expression. No time for a scowl, even if thatâs all you wanted to wear.
You adjusted your gown, tugged lightly at the hem, checked the wire hidden at your waist, and started walking in the direction Walker and that ugly barret he wore had vanished.
The crowd shifted around you like tidewaterâpolished politicians and strategic handshakes, investors with too-white smiles and drinks that cost more than your rent. Every few steps, someone waved. A few shook your hand like they knew you, like you were an old friend theyâd been waiting for. A woman asked for a photo. Another leaned in and whispered, âAre you joining the new team?â like it were a secret worth selling.
You deflected with a nod and a vague smile, each interaction leaving a layer of static behind your eyes.
It was strange how quickly the attention shifted now that you were in the spotlight. Recently, youâd spent most of your career standing behind Isaiah while JoaquĂn and Sam did the talking. You liked it there. It was quieter. Easier to breathe. Now, suddenly, they were holding out chairs for you at the table.
The whole thing felt like theatre. Scripted and glassy. Lines rehearsed. Costumes ironed. Every player doing their part beneath the blinding stage lights.
You still werenât sure what was worseâthat Bucky accepted Valentinaâs funding, or that he and his new friends let her call them The Avengers.
Sam was right to be angry. He should be. Heâd already turned down President Rossâ private offer to hand him the reins of a military-funded global response team. The same offer that Valentina had repackaged, repurposed, and handed off to people who were too coward to say no.
âHeâs on the east end, talking to Ava starr and another woman. I think sheâs Valentinaâs assistant. Ohâshit. He just pointed at you.â
Your chest tightened. You turned too fast, momentarily losing your bearings in the rotating lights and mirrored walls. Eastâeastâ
And then someone stepped into your path.
A wall of a man appeared in front of you so suddenly, you nearly collided with him; broad-shouldered and bearded, dressed in a burgundy suit that looked just a size too tight across his chest.
He smiled widely, eyes bright like heâd been waiting for a moment like this all night.
âI know you,â he said, voice thick with a Russian accent. âIâve seen you on the televisions. You shake hands with the new Captain America.â
You blinked. âIâuh, yeah.â
âAh!â He laughed, clapping one heavy hand to your shoulder with surprising gentleness for a man who looked like he could punch through drywall. âVery brave of you. Very good. You look different in person. In a strong way. Like a panther. Or mongoose.â
You tried for a diplomatic smile. âThanks, I think.â
âOh! Where are my manners,â he said, dramatically straightening and offering his hand. âI am Alexei Shostakov. The Red Guardian.â
You knew that, but you didnât know heâd be so... loud.
You took his hand, his grip warm and firm. âPleasure to meet you, Alexei.â
âKind. Very kind,â he said, eyes gleaming. âYou remind me of my daughter! You have same fire in eyes. Around same age, tooâyou could be friends! Yelena is always looking for new friends.â
Yelena Belova. That name lit something up in the back of your mind. Youâd seen the files. The attempted murder of Clint Barton. Her brief status as an independent threat before being absorbed, quietly and conveniently, into Valentinaâs new game.
And suddenly, Alexeiâs smile widened even more.
âYelena!â he bellowed, cupping his hands to his mouth as if you werenât standing in the middle of a very public, very polished gala. âCome meet new friend!â
Several heads turned. Cameras flashedâbright, blinding. You winced against the burst of lights, regretting everything from your dress colour to your decision to show up at all.
But it was too late. He leaned in beside you, one arm suddenly draped over your shoulder like you were posing for a family Christmas card. âSmile!â he boomed, and before you could protest, he struck a dramatic flex, biceps pressing into your back like steel girders.
You caught a whiff of expensive cologne and vodka.
In the corner of your eye, a flash of short, bleached blonde hair was making its way through the crowd with frightening determination. Elegant, yesâbut there was no mistaking the sharpness in Yelena Belovaâs gaze. She wore a sleek black suit like it was made of knives, a funky eyeliner design, hair slicked back and every step carved with purpose. And beside herâ
Your heart dipped.
Valentina Allegra de Fontaine.
Poised. Smirking. Watching everything.
âBe careful. Yelena is coming your way with Valentina.â
Thanks for the warning, JoaquĂn. Delayed. But thanks nevertheless.
You stood up straighter, willing your heartbeat to slow down even as Valentinaâs eyes zeroed in on you like a predator clocking a foe.
Wonderful.
You leaned slightly toward Alexei, trying not to seem as panicked as you felt. âCan I ask you something? About Bucky Barnes?â
âAh!â he exclaimed, cutting you off before you could finish the question. âBucky! Yes, yes. The Winter Soldier. Very cool. Very handsome. Like Soviet James Dean.â
You blinked. âI meanâdo you know where he is?â
But Alexei was already on another tangent. âWe fought in Uzbekistan once, did you know this? I threw him through a door. He did not like that. But I like him. I like him very much. Quiet, serious type. You know he never answers my texts?â
âRight. Yeah. That tracks.â
And thenâ
âOh, what a pleasant surprise,â said a voice sharp as champagne fizz and just as bitter. De Fontaine. She cut into the conversation with the smoothness of someone who was always in control, grinning like she knew a secret you didnât. A glass of bubbly dangled between her fingers, catching the light just enough to draw attention. As if she needed help with that.
âI was just about to introduce you all,â she said, placing a perfectly manicured hand on Yelenaâs arm as the blonde finally joined your little nightmare circle.
âWhat is this?â Yelena asked flatly, eyes flicking between you and Valentina.
Valentina didnât bother to answerâjust gave a smug little hum and tugged Yelena closer, corralling her between you and Alexei. The four of you shifted automatically into position, an unspoken reflex in rooms like this.
You could feel the cameras turning like sharks in bloodied water.
Flashes burst across your vision. The moment was already capturedâyour stiff shoulders, your frozen smile. A picture-perfect lineup of cooperation.
And you could feel it: this wasnât a coincidence.
This was intentional.
Valentina leaned in, voice cool and sugary against your ear as more bulbs burst. âI am so pleased to see you here,â she cooed, âconsidering how close you and Sam are.â
âI mean, I had to come congratulate you,â you said tightly, lips barely moving. âRecreating the Avengers. Thatâs⌠big.â
She beamed at the cameras, teeth white and wolfish. âSomeone had to.â
âOf course.â
Another flash. Another frozen pose.
You winced. Sam is going to kill you.
Valentina fielded the sudden swarm of questions like she was born in front of a podiumâdeflecting, redirecting, charming. Every answer was deliberate, each word chosen like a chess move. Stability. Legacy. Global confidence. Alliances.
They lapped it up like champagne, snapping photos, nodding, laughing. You stood beside her, barely blinking, jaw tight behind your polite smile.
You werenât meant to be part of this show. You were supposed to be on the outside looking in from the in the crowd.
When the flashes finally began to die down and the clamour shifted elsewhere, Valentina turned with that too-perfect, too-white grin. She glanced at Yelena and Alexei like she were dismissing children.
âWould you two mind?â she asked, breezy as ever. âIâd like to have a quick little chat.â
Yelenaâs gaze flicked toward you. Not unkind. But cautious. Reading you like a live wire.
âIs everything all right?â she asked, her brows subtly knitting.
âOh, everythingâs perfectly fine,â Valentina replied before you could speak, her hand already at your back. âGo fetch a drink. Mingle.â
It wasnât a suggestion.
You barely had time to glance back at Yelenaâat the slight, suspicious narrowing of her eyesâbefore the crowd swallowed her and Alexei whole.
Your earpiece crackled to life. âSheâs taking you to the balcony,â JoaquĂn said, voice low and taut. âThere are no cameras there. I wonât be able to see, but I can still hear you.â
There was a pause, then: âIâll keep looking for Bucky.â
You barely managed a breath of relief before Valentina cut in, sharp and smiling.
âBuckyâs not here tonight, if thatâs really why youâre here.â
You stiffened mid-step.
JoaquĂn swore in your ear. Something heavy hit a surfaceâmaybe his fist against a tableâand you heard the scrape of a chair.
âWhat do you mean?â you asked, your voice light, falsely sweet. âI came to celebrate you.â
You crossed the threshold to the balcony.
It was quieter out here, eerily so. The muffled pulse of the gala was dulled by glass and distance. The cold kissed your skin through your dress. You could feel it biting at your exposed arms, but you welcomed the sting. It was honest.
Below, the city stretched like a glowing circuit board. Skyscrapers hummed with light. Traffic moved in golden veins. It was beautiful in the kind of way that felt removed. Untouchable.
Valentinaâs heels clicked once against the stone floor, then stopped.
âCut the bullshit,â she scoffed, voice low now. âWe both know thatâs not true.â
You turned your head, slow and steady. Her eyes were already on you. Unflinching.
âWhereâs your friend?â she asked casually. âThe little Mexican one?â
You flinchedâjust barely. Your jaw clenched tight.
Valentina smiled wider at that.
You opened your mouth to answer, to lie, to throw her off, to say something clever, but she leaned forward before you could, voice barely above a whisper.
Her lips were close to your collarbone, eyes locked on your chest. On the mic she couldnât see.
âHola, JoaquĂn,â she murmured, velvet-smooth. âÂżCĂłmo estĂĄs? Howâs the arm? Still broken?â
She pulled back with a grin full of satisfaction. JoaquĂn didnât respondânot a breath. But you felt the burn of it in your gut. He heard her. She knew he was listening. And that was the whole point.
She got what she wanted. You could see it in the eyes, the tilt of her head, the calm sip from her glass, the curl of smugness just under her lipstick.
Valentina turned her back to the railing, facing you fully, her glass catching the amber light of the city. Her smile didnât crack once.
âYou know,â she began, like she was catching up with an old friend, her voice silked with charm, âyou donât have to keep playing both sides. Itâs exhausting, isnât it?â
You said nothing. Not because you didnât have something to say, but because the words wouldnât form. Your brain was too busy calculating exits, signals, whether JoaquĂn could hear any of this, or if he was already doing something stupid like storming into the gala uninvited.
âYou show up with a wire,â she continued, waving her champagne flute like it weighed nothing, âa dress like that, pretending youâre just here to smile for the cameras.â
Her eyes dipped slowly, then back up.
âYou do look stunning, by the way,â she added casually. âBut we both know youâre not here for the press or to butter yourself up to me or my team. Youâre listening. Recording. Digging...â
The flute met her lips again. Sip. Deliberate.
âLooking for Barnes,â she said. âLike heâs going to whisper some grand truth thatâll fix whatever little crisis your friends are having.â
You could feel your jaw tighten. Every word she spoke landed like pressure against a bruise you didnât want to admit was there.
Valentina tilted her head, studying you with the kind of gaze that belonged in an interrogation room, not a rooftop party. âYouâre sharp,â she said. âGood instincts. Itâs why Sam keeps you close, right?â
Still, you stayed silent. Because anything you gave her, sheâd twist. She already was.
âBut let me ask you something,â she said, voice a shade lower, softer. âWhatâs loyalty really worthâif the people you serve are always the ones left bleeding in the dirt?â
A pulse of heat shot up your neck. You didnât move, but she saw it.
Of course, she saw it.
âAnd for the record,â she added, twirling the stem of her glass, âI donât have anything against Sam Wilson. Poor guy. I pity him, actually. The shit heâs put up with just for carrying that shieldâGod.â
She clicked her tongue with exaggerated sympathy.
âIâd kill to have Captain America on my team. The real one. Not Walker. That man is a pathetic as it gets. Hair-trigger temper, zero emotional intelligenceââ
âSam would never work with you,â you said, sharper than intended.
Valentinaâs smile widened because you finally said something worthwhile. âOh, I know,â she said, almost gleefully. âHeâs a purist. One of the last. His morals are steel-tight. Fucking unshakable. A real Boy Scout. Steve Rogers made a good choice.â
And that was the part that hurtâthe part that made you swallow back a flicker of doubt you hadnât expected to feel.
âWhereâs Bucky?â you asked, voice quieter now. âI just want to talk to him.â
She didnât even hesitate.
âBuckyâs not missing or anything,â Valentina said. âHeâs busy. Doing a job for me in Pennsylvania. Cleaning up some loose ends, you know the deal.â
You felt it before you could stop itâthat tiny, invisible shift in your expression. Something cracked. Something gave her an answer you hadnât meant to give.
âThat supposed to scare me?â you asked, though it already kind of did.
âNo,â she said. âItâs supposed to make you think. About options. About what someone like you could do with the right resources. With the right funding. Imagine it: you with your own team. Autonomy. Access. No more red tape. You make your own shots. We clean up whatever mess you leave behind. And, get this, you even get paid for it.â
You glanced toward the city, anything to avoid her eyes. Lights. Windows. Warmth. All of it felt so far away.
âAnd if I say no?â
âThen someone else says yes.â
She stepped back, brushing something from her blazer sleeve. âJust think about it,â she said, all silk and sugar again. âWe could use someone like you. You belong in rooms like this, you know. Not chasing ghosts, or waiting for Wilson to approve your next move. Youâre already breaking. I can see it. You wouldnât be here tonight if you werenât. Iâm sure Captain America wonât be happy seeing your name in the headlines tomorrow morning: The Next Potenital Avenger.â
Her smile held, framed in the cold, glittering dark of the balcony. Then she turned and walked past you, the soft graze of her shoulder against yours more intimate than it had any right to be. A mockery of closeness.
âEnjoy the rest of your evening,â she said, already stepping back through the doors. âTell Sam I said hi.â
The glass door shut behind her with a quiet click.
And the cold came in fast.
Not just the air, but the after. The silence. The wrongness of being left alone up here, the wind biting now that you werenât so focused on not showing fear.
Your body finally remembered it was yours. Your fingers hurt from gripping the railing too hard. You eased your hands free, flexed them, saw the white draining slowly from your knuckles. You still couldnât feel them.
Your mic hissed faintly to life, and JoaquĂnâs voice filtered through the static like someone calling out to you underwater.
ââŚyou okay?â he asked, strained. Urgent.
You didnât answer right away. Your mind was still racing through what Valentina had said, how easily sheâd dodged your defences, how easy she was to turn your presence into a publicity stunt, how well she knew youâor at least thought she did.
She must be blackmailing Bucky. That must be it.
You kept staring out at the skyline like it might give you an answer. It didnât. Just glass and steel and lights that blinked too slow to feel alive.
âNo,â you finally muttered.
It didnât come out strong. It came out cracked. Like the inside of your chest had gone hollow, and you were just now realizing it.
JoaquĂn exhaled through the comm, like heâd been holding his breath.
âI think legal action is our next step,â he said, tone snapping back into focus like a lifeline. âWe can sue them for the name. Trademark it. Or maybeâmaybe Sam tries to talk to Bucky again? Weâve still got options.â
You didnât respond. Not yet.
The railing under your palm felt like ice. You blinked hard, fighting back the sudden sting in your eyes. Not from fear. From frustration. From the way every word she said still echoed in your head, sticky and sharp, leaving splinters behind.
You dragged in a breath.
ââŚthat fucking bitch,â you scoffed.
âYeah⌠I donât like Valentina either.â
You jumped.
The voice came from somewhere behind you, softer, unsure. You spun around on instinct, stepping away from the railing.
That man.
The one who stepped on your dress earlier. He was sitting now, low in one of the patio couches near a sleek electric fireplace that flickered lazily against the dark. The flames glinted off the patio doors and caught the edge of his profileâbrown hair, downturned mouth, eyes wide like he was the one who got caught.
You hadnât noticed him when you came out here. And now that you really looked⌠you realized why.
He wasnât trying to be seen.
He sat in the farthest corner of the couch, hunched slightly, knees close together, hands clutched like he didnât know what to do with them. Like someone had planted him there and told him to wait. The firelight danced across his face, softening him. He didnât look threatening. Just... startled. And oddly apologetic for existing.
He offered a small, nervous smile. âSorry, I didnât mean to, like⌠scare you.â
There was genuine concern in his voiceâconcern for you, not about you. That was rare.
âItâs fine,â you said, because you didnât know what else to say.
âWhoâs that?â JoaquĂn's voice cracked through your earpiece.
You didnât answer right away.
Your eyes stayed on the stranger, and for a moment, you debated whether or not to even breathe too loud.
âI donât knowâŚâ You muttered.
âOkay, uh⌠Iâll try to do a voice match or somethingâsee if anything comes up. Keep them talking.â
The man mustâve noticed the way you were half-turned, the way your fingers brushed against your ear.
He shifted slightly. âWhoâre⌠whoâre you talking to?â
You froze. And then, with a wince: âUh⌠just⌠myself. Thinking out loud.â
There was a pause.
âOh,â he said. âYeah. I do that too. All the time, actually.â
You werenât sure what to do with that. You werenât sure what to do with him.
He looked different now compared to earlier. Still awkward, still nervousâbut less like he was trying to shrink into himself and more like he was trying his best to meet you where you were. His eyes held yours this time. Not for long, though. They dropped to his hands and shoes after a while. But it was long enough to feel it.
You took a cautious step forward, angling yourself toward the fire, toward him, but still keeping a healthy distance.
âYou um⌠You know Valentina?â you asked. Stupid. Of course, he did. Everyone at this party did.
âUh⌠yeah. Something like that,â he said, rubbing the back of his neck. âI wasnât like⌠eavesdropping or anything. Itâs justâthereâs a lot of people in there. And itâs⌠quieter out here.â
He hesitated, then added: âIâm Bob, by the way.â
His voice wavered, but not from dishonesty. He said his name like he wasnât sure it would mean anything to you. Like he just told you his name to be kind.
You gave him a nod. Not a smile. But not cold either.
âHi, Bob.â
A beat passed.
You debated telling him your name. JoaquĂn would probably advise against it. But you werenât feeling tactical anymoreâyou were feeling tired. Bruised in a way you couldnât name. And maybe you just needed to feel like a real person again. Like someone who wasnât being puppeteered.
So, after a pause, you gave him your name.
Bob blinked. Then he offered a small, shy smile that cracked at the edges.
âCool. Hi,â he said, breathless. His brows furrowed as his gaze dropped lower, his eyes catching on your waist, your hips. âUhâsorry again, about your dress. I didnât mean to step on it earlier. You looked like you were in a rush and Iâwell, I was definitely in your way.â
You felt your lips twitch. The barest curve, not sharp or defensive. A faint grin. Delicate. âItâs alright,â you said. âBound to happen at places like these.â
His head tilted slightly, curious. âYou come to stuff like this often?â
âNot often. Just sometimes.â
And it was only then that you realized youâd stepped closer.
Your arms had casually found their place against the back of the couch across from him, hands gripping the cool metal frame as your scarf drifted with the breeze behind you. You werenât leaning in exactly, but the distance had shrunk.
When did that happen?
You tilted your head, letting your eyes linger a little longer now, more curious than guarded. You assessed him with a little more attention now.
âIâm guessing you donât come to these events much?â
Bob immediately shook his head, a nervous, breathy laugh escaping his lips like it was running away from him. You could see the cloud of it in the cold night air, swirling and vanishing between you.
âGod, no. This is my second one and itâsâitâs been a lot. I think Iâm gonna ask to just stay in my room next time.â He gave a little shrug, slouching a bit. âItâs not like I do much anyway. I mean, Iâm allowed to talk to people, and I like talking to people, but Iâd rather not sometimes.â
That made you blink. Allowed?
The word snagged on something in your mind. There was something disarming about the way he said it, like he didnât mean to offer that information but also didnât think it was worth hiding. You couldnât tell if he was joking, oversharing, or both. But it was too strange to ignore. Like it slipped past a filter that wasnât built right. It made you hesitate, if only for a breath.
But he wasnât watching your reaction. He was staring at the flicker of the fire, letting the silence sit between you like it belonged there.
You folded your arms gently across your chest, the smooth material of your dress whispering beneath your fingertips.
âYou seem to be talking just fine with me,â you pointed out, softer now.
Bob looked down at his hands. Then back at you. Then away again.
âI⌠wellâŚâ he stammered, voice catching on another shy, almost embarrassed laugh.
And then you saw it.
The blush. A warm pink crawling up from the collar of his white shirt to the apples of his cheeks. Subtle, but not subtle enough to miss. Especially not in the glow of the firelight, which danced over his skin like it had a crush of its own.
âI⌠yeah, I... I donât know. Some people are easier to talk to than others, I guess.���
Your mouth twitched before you could stop it.
âYeah,â you said, âIâd say so.â
The smile that tugged at your lips came easier than you expected. Not just polite. Not guarded. Honest. Probably the first one youâd let slip all night.
Seriously, who the hell is this guy? And why did he make the night feel a little less awful?
He was cute. Not the kind of handsome that announces itself the second someone walks in the room, but the kind that sneaks up on you, quiet, awkward, totally unsure of how much space he takes up and trying not to be a bother. Like he wasnât used to being looked at for too long and didnât know where to put himself when he was.
Youâd seen a lot of people in this world wear confidence like a costume. Bob didnât even try. He wore uncertainty like a second skin, and somehow, it made him feel⌠real.
You liked the way he didnât crowd you. Didnât puff out his chest or pretend to have all the answers. He sat with his knees slightly knocked together, most of his hands swallowed by the sleeves of his jacket, like even they were too bold to leave out in the open. Maybe he was anxious. Maybe a little broken in the places that never healed right, but he felt safe. Your gut told you so.
And that made you more nervous than anything else tonight.
You caught yourself watching him again. The way he kept his hands mostly hidden in his sleeves, shoulders rounded forward. His suit was clearly tailored but still seemed a size too big, like someone had tried to wrap him in something expensive just to prove he belonged. And still, it worked.
His hair was brown and shaggy, a bit longer than most people would have it at these events, barely even styled, but you kind of liked it. It gave him a strange charm, even if the loose curls hid his eyes whenever he ducked his head.
You werenât used to thoughts like this. Not ones this soft. Not ones that fluttered in your chest like nervous birds. Not often. Not like this. Not here. Not in places like these.
You came for Bucky. That was the plan. Show up, find him, talk. Clear the air. Maybe start patching things up with your broken little found familyâcracks and all. But Bucky wasnât here. Valentina played you like a fiddle, and now the whole night had soured. Tomorrow, youâd wake up to press statements and headlines, scrambling to explain why your name wouldnât be on the next New Avengers roster. Youâd spin it clean, of course. Thatâs what you did.
But none of that mattered yet.
In this strange little pocket of quiet, just outside the hum of power plays and champagne politics, you kind of just wanted something normal. Not mission normal. Not cover-identity normal. Real normal. A conversation that didnât hinge on leverage or patriotism. A moment that wasnât already weaponized.
Maybe you could stay for another half hour before you disappeared and joined JoaquĂn in the van downstairs, counting your losses.
And maybe it was the firelight, a flicker here, a flicker there, warmth and glow dancing in the night that influenced you. But you found yourself leaning forward a little more, walking around the couch, smoothing your hands down the front of your dress. You straightened your spine, trying to will yourself into being brave.
âWould you...â You paused, âum. Do you wanna grab a drink with me?â
Bob blinked, eyes flicking up to meet yours. He sat up straighter at the invitation, startled, like a puppy hearing its name for the first time. His lips parted. For a split second, you swore he looked excited. Maybe even hopeful.
But then he deflated.
His shoulders fell, his expression shifting to a quiet sort of apology as his eyes darted away. âI... I canât. Sorryââ
âOh.â You blinked, trying not to let your smile falter.
âI want to,â he rushed to say, almost stumbling over the words. âI do.â
âItâs okayââ
âNo. No. I would. Itâs just... IâmâIâm sober now.â
Your mouth opened. Then closed.
âOh.â
âIâm sorryââ he added quickly, like he was terrified heâd ruined something.
But you shook your head, even stepping a little closer without realizing it.
âNo. Donât be sorry,â you said gently. âSeriously. Congratulations. Thatâs a big deal.â
He smiled at that, small and grateful. A little crooked and thin-lipped. It was cute.
âThanks.â
You hesitated a moment, then tilted your head. âCan I ask how long?â
âUhâŚâ He scratched the back of his neck, eyes flicking upward like he was counting the months with the stars. âI think about a year now. Iâve only really started keeping track since I moved here, so... maybe like, seven? Eight months?â
You smiled softly, your heart unexpectedly warm.
âThatâs still a long time.â
He gave a sheepish shrug, and his cheeks pinked again, like he didnât quite know what to do with your praise. Like no one gave it to him often enough for it to feel normal.
âSome days feel longer than others,â he said, the corner of his mouth twitching at his own tease.
You couldnât help the laugh that bubbled out of you, quiet, but real.
âWhat are youâŚ?â
JoaquĂnâs voice fizzled to life in your ear, cracking the quiet like a crowbar to glass.
âAre you flirting right now?â
You froze, the smile instantly tugging at your lips again despite yourself.
When you didnât answer, he laughed.
âOh my god, youâre totally flirting right now! Itâs so bad, but you so are! Who even is this guy?â
You turned ever so slightly, subtle as you could manage, and pressed a knuckle into your ear to mute him. Your cheeks warmed in tandem with Bobâs.
Bob blinked. âSorry⌠did I, umâwas that weird?â
âNo, no,â you said quickly, maybe too quickly. âThat wasnât you.â
He just nodded, like your word was more than enough. Like you couldâve told him the moon was fake, and heâd say, huh, never really thought about that before.
You moved to take a seat across from him, the fireplace crackling softly between you like a low, slow heartbeat. The warmth of the flames painted him in golds and ambers, the flickering light catching the softness in his eyes and the loose fall of his hair.
You fidgeted with your fingers out of instinct. And across the fire, he mirrored the motionâthumb twisting around his knuckle, pinky tapping rhythmically against the inside of his sleeve. There was something strangely reassuring in that shared nervousness, like you were both waiting for the same storm to pass.
You let out a quiet breath, tension easing from your shoulders. âYou said you moved here? Like, New York?â
âYeah,â he said, nodding. His shoulders dipped too, visibly relaxing just a touch, like your voice permitted him to breathe. âI⌠uh, I lived in Malyasha for a while. But Iâm from Florida. Born and raised. Whereâwhere are you from?â
You tilted your head slightly, watching how intently he tried to keep eye contact and how quickly he broke it again. âI flew in from Washington.â
âD.C.?â he asked, and you nodded.
His eyebrows lifted, eyes wide for a split second. âWow. Do you work in the White House or something?â
You huffed a laugh, smiling into your words. âSure. Something like that.â
His head bobbed along with the answer.
âSo youâre like⌠a really important person here.â
You laughed again, this time wider. Your teeth showed. It surprised you how easily you let your guard down. âI wouldnât say that.â
But he was smiling too, softer now. Less anxious.
âYou are,â he said, more sure of himself now. âI saw the way people looked at you tonight. Notânot that I was watching you or anything⌠just, itâs hard not to. Youâre, umâŚâ
You saw the moment he lost his words, saw them spill and scatter like marbles across a floor. His blush deepened, blooming across his cheeks in a full, unmistakable deep red colour. He ducked his head, eyes falling to his shoes again, and you watched him fight a shy, apologetic smile.
ââŚI can see why theyâd want your picture.â
And just like that, your heart softened.
You leaned in a little, elbows resting against your knees. âThank you, Bob. Youâre really sweet, you know that?â
Bob looked up again, startled by the compliment, his mouth parting slightly like he didnât know what to say to that. You werenât sure if anyone had ever told him that before, and if they had, you could guess they didnât mean it the way you did now.
He didnât belong here. That much was obvious. Not with people like Valentina, not with cold smiles and polished lies. Not with mercenaries, politicians, and millionaires who hide behind their money. You could see it in the way he sat too stiffly on a velvet chair meant for lounging, in the way he tugged at his sleeves or tucked his hands away when he felt exposed.
âWhatâre you doing in a place like this, Bob?â
He blinked, tilting his head like he wasnât sure what you meant.
You smiled, eyes squinting a little as you leaned forward more. âI mean, are you like, a sponsor? Investor?â
The words didnât even sound right on your tongue, not when directed at him. The image of him swirling champagne and talking stocks was so laughably out of sync with the shy guy currently pressing himself into the couch cushions like he wanted to disappear.
âI donât think youâre here for the politics,â you added, and there was a touch of something playful in your voice.
He chuckled softly, eyes crinkling at the corners. âMe? Gosh, no. I donât⌠I donât do politics.â He scratched the back of his ear, sheepish again. âThatâs Buckyâs thing. Iâm here for my friends.â
And just like that, your whole world tilted.
Your smile dropped before you could stop it. A subtle shift, but you felt it everywhere: in your spine, in your lungs, in the weight of your hands resting suddenly still on your knees.
You straightened. Slowly.
ââŚYou know Bucky?â
The question came quieter than you intended, and Bob mustâve heard the change, the sudden stillness in your voice. His smile faltered, and he went still, too, sensing the tension without understanding it. His posture shrank, as if unsure what heâd stepped into, as if trying not to take up more space than he already had to upset you.
He nodded, a cautious kind of affirmation. âYeah. Heâs my friend.â
That stunned silence stretched long between you.
âI⌠I know heâs your friend too,â Bob added quickly, the words spilling out like he was trying to fill the void before it grew too wide. His voice was quieter now, softer around the edges, almost apologetic. âI heard you talking about him to Val, IâI thought maybeâŚâ
You werenât sure why he kept talking. Maybe because you hadnât said anything. Maybe because your smile had disappeared too fast, and he could feel the way the mood had shifted even if he didnât know why. His nervous ramble wasnât meant to hurt, you could tell that. But it did. It did because the moment he said Val, something in you knotted tight again.
The warm glow youâd felt around him moments ago started to dim, curling in on itself like a candle snuffed out mid-flicker. Your heart gave a small, stupid lurchâembarrassed at how quickly youâd let your guard down. Of course he knew Bucky. Of course he was close to Valentina. The pieces slid together too easily now, fitting into a picture you didnât want to look at.
You tried to pull yourself back together, quickly and quietly. You reminded yourself this wasnât supposed to be about comfort. It wasnât about soft smiles or normal conversations or maybe asking someone out for a drink. You came here with a mission, no matter how personal it was. To find Bucky. To set the record straight. Thisâthis moment of peace with a stranger who felt safeâwasnât supposed to happen.
He called her Val. Like they were friends. Like they knew each other beyond just work. Like he wasnât just some shy, nice guy who complimented you under his breath and blushed when you smiled at him. Jesus, were you that easy?
A strange bitterness bloomed in your mouth. Not anger, more like disappointment. At yourself, maybe. For forgetting, even just for a second, what kind of place this really was.
You stood up.
The decision was sudden, impulsive, a small motion made louder by the way Bob flinched. His eyes followed you, something tentative and uncertain flickering across his face.
You reached for your earpiece, thumb brushing over the button to unmute JoaquĂn.
But Bob stood, too. Slowly, almost clumsily, like he wasnât sure if he was supposed to follow you or stay where he was.
âDid Iâdid I say something wrong?â he asked.
You froze. Your fingers stilled over the earpiece. You hadnât expected that.
You turned, not quite facing him fully, but enough to catch the look on his face. His brows had drawn together, confusion etched faintly into his expression, and one of his hands was lifted just slightly, hovering in the air between you like heâd started to reach out and changed his mind halfway through. There were still several feet of space between you. The fire crackled low between you both, casting shadows across the expensive furniture and marble tiles.
âIâm sorry if I did,â he said, voice smaller now. âI didnât mean to upset you.â
That stopped you. âNo⌠you didnâtâŚâ You said, the words stumbling out, half-formed. You didnât know why you tried to soothe him. Maybe it was the way his eyes had gone wide or the way he seemed to dread the thought of you walking away just when he was finally starting to settle into himself. It stirred something in you. Something that made your chest tighten.
You couldâve said never mind. You wanted to. Pretend his words hadnât struck a nerve, hadnât made your heart twist in your chest. But they did. It bothered you.
âYou didnât upset me,â you repeated, softer now. âI just⌠wasnât expecting that.â
Bob blinked at you. âOh,â he said, so gently it almost got carried off by the breeze.
A silence fell between you again. You wrapped your arms around yourself against the wind as you turned to look at him.
âWho are you, Bob?â
He straightened, caught off guard. âIâm... Iâm Bob,â he said. âJust... just Bob.â
You tilted your head. âThatâs it?â
He opened his mouth like he was about to say more, but nothing came out. His lips parted, then pressed shut again, the words retreating back into him like they were scared to be seen. He just shrugged helplessly. Like thatâs all he had left.
And yet he kept looking at you like he was begging you not to go. Not yet.
You sighed, bringing your fingers up to your temple, pressing cold skin to your warm forehead. There was a pulse pounding there now, dull and insistent.
âI justâŚâ You started, voice cracking faintly. âI came here looking for Bucky. I thought maybe I could get him to come home.â
âHome?â Bob asked carefully, his eyes soft.
âYeah. With Sam. With us.â You hesitated, glancing through the tall windows behind him. The light inside spilled gold across the floor, where laughter echoed and people clinked glasses without a care in the world. Your eyes landed on the group youâd been avoiding all nightâBuckyâs new team, huddled together with drinks, grinning like it was just another night to celebrate.
It made your chest hollow out.
âEver since he joined Valentinaâs little fuckass team or... whatever this is,â you said, gesturing vaguely toward the gala behind you, âeverythingâs just been so... shitty.â
You looked back at Bob, surprised to find that heâd stepped a little closer. Just enough that you could see the way his jaw twitched, like he was working through something he didnât know how to say.
âSorry,â you muttered, suddenly self-conscious. âNot to, like, dump all that on you.â
The cold bit into your arms. You rubbed them quickly, wishing youâd brought a coat.
âItâs not...â Bob started, and then, more firmly, âItâs not a fuckass team.â
You blinked. âSorry?â
âThey saved me,â he said, voice trembling just a bit. âLena. Bucky. The others. Theyâre my family. We... we take care of each other.â
You stared at him, something icy curling low in your stomach. âYeah?â
âYeah,â he said again, earnest. âI know it probably doesnât look like it from the outside, but... they gave me a chance when no one else would. They didnât treat me like I was broken. They... saw me.â
You wanted to believe that. You really did. But it felt like trying to swallow glass.
âRight,â you muttered, too tired to argue. âI have to go.â
You turned, reaching for your earpiece.
âWait,â Bob said suddenly, like heâd only just realized this was goodbye. âWill I... will I see you again?â
You paused, fingers still hovering near your ear. The balcony lights flickered faintly behind you, and the sound of the city buzzed low in the background, as if the world were holding its breath.
You didnât turn around right away.
Part of you wanted to say no. Make it easy. Clean.
But when you finally looked back at him, at the boyish worry carved into his face, the way he stood there with his hands half-raised like he didnât know whether to reach for you or let you go, you felt that ache again. The one that whispered that maybe, despite everything, he meant what he said. That maybe there was still something worth salvaging in the strange, quiet warmth youâd felt earlier. Something real.
And you desperately wanted it to be real. You wanted it to mean something.
âI donât know,â you admitted, voice barely above a whisper.
Bob swallowed. Nodded like he understood.
But his eyes lingered on you like he hoped the answer might change.
part two.
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