#mcu incorrect chats

[trickarrows-bishop]

[thekingwhereitallends]

Yelena: I dunno what's funnier.

Yelena: That Bucky is chronologically the oldest dude in the team, Alex is physically the oldest but people still look at John and are like "Duh, i bet the house this guy's the dad of these suicidal misfits."

Bucky: Oh...

Alexei: Jeez...

Ava: It's about the grumpy attitude.

Bob: Maybe you should smile more oft-

John: Maybe i should shave-

Everyone: OH HELL NA!

Yelena: Actually, not a horrible idea.

Ava: (pinches Yelena on back) zip it.

Yelena: (calmly) ouch.

*A few days later*

Yelena: (just woke up, rubs her eyes but suddenly spots someone in the kitchen pouring a cup of coffee)

Yelena: Who the hell are yo-

Yelena: DAMMMMMMN!

Yelena: (blushes) Now that's where it becomes hard picking my date.

Yelena: I love my men fresh and glabrous the best.

Yelena: Don't let anyone ruin your mood. That's one hell of a sexy face.

John: (flustered, passes Yelena her cup of coffee) Thanks, i guess?

Yelena: (pinches John on cheek) Aren't you the sweetest darling this morning?!?

[the-suicidal-lizard]

Friends

Matt: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends. Jessica: ... Your what? Matt, sighing realising he referred to "Team Red" as his friends: My friends. Jessica: Is he saying "friends"? Luke: I think he's being sarcastic. Danny: No, no, no, this is delirium, he's cracked from being awake all night. Hey Matt! All of your friends are in this room. Matt: I have other friends! You asked me to make new friends that weren't just Foggy and Karen! I made friends! It was a task! I complete tasks!

[janthonyfell]

Peter: Hey Vis, whats a word thar starts with "f" and ends with "uck"?

Vision, one week old and already questioning many things at once: uh... well, im sorry but the word that starts with "f" and ends with "uck" is inappropriate, offensive and I'm not sure you can say it yourself.

Peter, holding back a laugh: The answer is "firetruck", ha! gotcha!

Vision, sighing: I'm sorry for misunderstanding your question Peter. "Firetruck" is indeed a word that starts with "f" and ends with "uck".

[be-compromised]

Mini Promptathon 2025 Masterlist

Thank you to everyone who took part in the February 2025 Mini Promptathon! A masterlist is available below and on dreamwidth; if there's anything incorrect or missing, please just let me know.

As usual, you can still create fills for any of the prompts for this event. If you feel inspired, please share! We won't be including any later fics in this masterlist, but we'd love to see what you come up with.

50 Ways To Leave Your Partner (Dead) by @chaed (T; no warnings) Prompt: *flirting* if you had to kill me how would you do it?

Anything for Love | AO3 by ultra_fic (G/K; no warnings apply) Prompt: "I'd do anything for you." Romantic, or terrifying?

and i run (love, run) | AO3 by sleepymaddy (General Audiences; no warnings) Prompt: Sometimes you just have to disappear for a while

Assassin's Honour | AO3 by @alphaflyer (T; no warnings) Prompt: Yelena gets her heartbroken. She heads to her Sister for comfort but Nats away on a mission. So she has to settle for Clint instead.

Double Dare | AO3 by ultra_fic (PG/K+; no warnings apply) Prompt: “If I ask you to kiss me in front of all these people, will you do it?"

Double Truth | AO3 by ultra_fic (PG-13/T; no warnings apply) Prompt: “If I ask you to kiss me in front of all these people, will you do it?" Sequel to Double Dare.

Galentine's Day by @alphaflyer (General; no warnings apply) Prompt: Natasha is introduced to Galentine's Day.

Goodnight, Sleep Tight | AO3 by @cassiesinsanity (PG; no warnings) Prompt: All Clint needs to crash out after a rough mission is a semi-flat surface (optional), greasy food (non-negotiable), and a can of beer (preferably cold). Natasha, on the other hand, has a whole pre-sleep ritual that could double as a mission checklist before she even thinks about that 13-hour recovery nap.

Here Now | AO3 by @firlalaith (PG; no warnings) Prompt: From the discord chat: The owl in the Christmas tree, in the Hawkeye tv show, is Natasha. (Natasha haunting Clint in owl form, Natasha gifted/cursed, Natasha as a shapeshifter...?)

i'm not gonna teach him how to dance with you by @quidnunc-life (T; no warnings) Prompt: Clint & Natasha have been soulmate type BFFs for so long, but when one (or both) of them starts a romance with someone, obviously, it's going to change things.

"Its not who you are, its what I'm not" by @redbirdbella (PG; no warnings but angsty) Prompt: I love you, it's ruining my life

More Than A Team | AO3 by ultra_fic (G/K; no warnings apply) Prompt: "we'll figure it out together"

NPC | AO3 by @inkvoices (PG; MCU Endgame compliant) Prompt: So Clint & Kate or Clint/Kate are my obsession right now. I'd love to see a supernatural something with Natasha's spirit watching over Clint. Because honestly, I don't think she'd be able to just leave him to his own devices, no matter how competent he is.

NPC Part 2 by @alphaflyer (PG; MCU Endgame compliant) Prompt: So Clint & Kate or Clint/Kate are my obsession right now. I'd love to see a supernatural something with Natasha's spirit watching over Clint. Because honestly, I don't think she'd be able to just leave him to his own devices, no matter how competent he is.

On the Edge (With You) by @cassiesinsanity (PG: incomplete, no warnings) Prompt: Pole dance - AU a good excuse for Clint to have bruises

Oxygen Is A Scam by @chaed (G, no warnings) Prompt: Acclimatisation (interpret at will!)

Purgatory by @redbirdbella (T+; no warings, poly - Clint/Natasha/Bucky) Prompt: we just had a one-night stand but a massive storm hit so now we’re snowed in, hello awkward

The Canadian Crisis | AO3 by @inkvoices (Teen and Up; tongue-in-cheek political references) Prompt: Secretary Pearce orders SHIELD to invade Canada. Clint tips off Deadpool and Wolverine.

The Privilege is Mine | AO3 by @inkvoices (Teen and Up; injury and non-specific talk of assisted dying in part ‘FOUR’) Prompt: *flirting* if you had to kill me how would you do it?

through the sleepless night | AO3 by @archers-and-spies (T; no warnings) Prompt: All Clint needs to crash out after a rough mission is a semi-flat surface (optional), greasy food (non-negotiable), and a can of beer (preferably cold). Natasha, on the other hand, has a whole pre-sleep ritual that could double as a mission checklist before she even thinks about that 13-hour recovery nap.

Written on My Heart | AO3 by @cassiesinsanity (Teen; no warnings, poly - Clint/Nat/Laura) Prompt: Poly - someone in the relationship decides to organised them, with a google calendar or something, to make sure everyone gets time with each other no one feels left out, no one worries if someone is on a mission, and what have you. This could either work out well or comically not.

[umbrelladripdrop]

Hello People!

Figured I should actually make something of an introduction so here it is:

Hi people, I'm Rain and I make fanfic. Currently, my interests are Anime, MCU, and DC comics though with that one it's more BatFamily (and by that I mean it's like only the BatFamily with a sprinkle of the other guys there). When it comes to anime specifically I dabble in a lot of shows but my 'main' ones I guess are MHA, Demon Slayer, and Naruto.

If you want to check out my Ao3 my profile there is Umbrella_Drop but I'll put a link here to my page on that as well.

As of now I'm still getting used to actually posting on here instead of just lurking but as for what I'll be posting here:

Some general thoughts

Little fic prompts/ideas of fics I hope to one day make but in reality would probably just be one or two fics that would forever be a WIP

Things relating to my current fic that I'm working on

Posts announcing when a new chapter for one of my fics is posted

Attempts at humor through incorrect quote style bits (usually with Dabi, Danny, and Jason since they're the focus of my current fic)

That's all I can think of to say now so yeah check out my fics if you're interested! Right now I'm working on a three way crossover kind of chat fic (as in it both has chat fic and normal fic parts) between Danny from Danny Phantom, Jason Todd from Batman/DC Comics, and Dabi from My Hero Academia and it's being updated once a week every Monday when I finish the next chapter!

[x3nnia]

X-02 Origins

First post!

Whole series is smut with plot + a whole lotta lore (don't worry this is just the lore part)

Still, even if theres no smexy stuff, minors DNI. Strong language, and depicted smoking (i ended up not adding it), be aware.

If you are used to tumblr smut stories, or just tumblr period, then you already know what youre getting into, I cant list all of that shit on here while half asleep.

Based on MCU

Some lore got lazy, so some of it sounds incorrect, just go along with it, its fiction.

This is the only part of the series with first person, since this one is only focused around the main character's backstory.

ENJOYEEEEE!!!!

Hello! My name is Lily, and I am a mutant! My powers are somewhat simple; regeneration, bone claws, and government wanting to experiment on you all the time! Whole shabang! But... its really hard to explain this, but... I am 18. 18, forever. It is VERY hard (thats what he said) to explain that to people... like, imagine someone telling you that theyre 123! But, for you to understand more, lets start BEFORE square one...

I was born in the US, Georgia, 1901. Once I discovered my power at 7, I ran away, and went from state to state, hiding, and afraid of what someone would do if my power was revealed. While I was on the run, at 16 I made it into an elite team, with people who were mutants like me! It seemed pretty cool, and there was this one strange teammate who would never really talk, and he was really handsome, but since we were on the job I never really interacted with him, I was too shy. I'm pretty sure his name was Logan, or Jimmy, one of the two. He was really good at his job though, and he communicated with the other members well, just not me, he probably thought I was too young to be doing a job like this.

On one particular mission though, we were asked to go to Nigeria and retrieve a newly discovered material, that could potentially change the world. Or atleast thats what we were told. We were asked during the mission to kill some innocent locals, Logan couldnt do it, he walked out, and a few weeks, so did almost everyone else. We were going after other mutants and capturing them, I couldnt be apart of something so horrible. I went farther into the states, and stayed in Colorado for a while. It was cold, I could go skiing, and it was private. No neighbors. No distractions. Just snow.

Finally, when I was about to turn 18, guess who showed up at my door? Stryker. After the incident in nigeria, I wanted nothing more to do with him, or the rest of the team that stayed with him. He gave me some bullshit lecture about "Your country needs you" and how someone was hunting down the old team... I didnt think I had anything to worry about, until Victor came. Logan's older brother. He was annoying, not to mention frightening, not his face, his nails. They scratched along my walls, making an ear-covering sound. I was thrown around like a ragdoll, and when I was too weak to get up and fight back, they bagged me up and took me to some nuclear reactor site...

As I woke up, I looked around, I was strapped to a table, with X-02 tattooed on my forearm. There was a huge tank of water underneath me, all I could hear parts of conversations from the scientists: "The last one was successful, hopefully this one doesnt escape." "Yeah, Im surprised that X even survived.". A doctor walked up to me, taking notice of my consiousness, they asked me: "Are you ready?" I replied with "What?" then asked "Who is X? What is X-02?". They answered "Oh, X was Logan, he was on your old team. You probably dont remember him. You are X-02, we are performing the same experiment we did on him, onto you. X didnt really fail, he just somehow managed to slip out of our fingers." "Enough with the chatting now, head down, stay still, this might hurt a bit." I looked at them with wide eyes "WAIT- BACK UP- WHAT?" she then says back "And be quiet." She walks off with her clipboard and pen, scribbling down notes.

As I was lowered into the water tank, I was infused with that metal we found in Nigeria, Adamantium. It would make me indestructible, strong, and obviously heavier, since its a metal. It did hurt like hell, I could feel it going into my bones, and the needles going through some bones aswell. I didnt mind it much, since I was just going to heal anyways.

When the procedure was done, god did I feel better. Not only better, different... I woke up in a cell, that looked more like a cage than a cell, really. There were other mutants in cells too, one of them was really pretty, her mutation was diamond skin. She was sort of a crush but I never got to talk to her, so I wasnt too interested. I popped out my claws to see if they looked any different, which they did, and I probably shouldve expected that. Having metal infused into my body.

They looked pretty sharp, like knives, maybe sharper than an average kitchen knife. I tried to test them out on the cell by swatting at it once, but since the cell wasnt made out of adamantium, my claws cut through it easily. I saw a scientist walking past, so I quickly went back to the other side of the cell, pretending like I didnt know that the cell was broken. They didnt seem to notice, as they were looking down at their clipboard while they were walking. As I saw them walk out of the room I tore apart the cell some more so I could squeeze out.

The only hard part now was getting past the guards and getting transportation...

I snuck around to one of the main exits, and it seemed to be unguarded... It was too easy. But as I got closer the sign on the door said "Fire alarm will sound when opened". So I just thought "You know what, this is probably the only one thats unguarded. Im getting the fuck outta here.". And youre probably wondering: "What about the other mutants? Arent you going to save them too?" Well, no, their powers can get them out and keep them safe- I guess they just dont have a plan on how to get out of the building, other than that im not sure why theyre still in those cells in the first place.

Anyways, back to me escaping. I push the door open and sprint out like a track star, hoping I can make it out without getting caught and taken back in. As the door shuts I hear the alarm go off inside, and Im almost long gone now. Im finally free.

almost a year later, im 18 now! I wasnt really able to celebrate on my birthday (as you know), so I just celebrated about a week later, when I was able to get an apartment in New York. I also got a new car, a new name (by which I introduced myself as at the start of the story), and a pet cat named Nyx (SHES SO CUTE OMG). So basically I just hit the restart button on life. Youre probably thinking again "What about your mutant abilities?" as for that... Since im not in danger, I dont use them in public, and rarely at home, because I changed my name and where I live, im not really being hunted down anymore by Stryker. Basically a happily ever after for me! Well- sort of....

Hehe cliffhanger.

If you enjoyed this, then check out my series! This is the origin story for the main character in the series, so people would understand more of the character before reading the main series.

By the way, Lily having a crush on Logan and then having a crush on the mutant girl in the cell, yes shes Bisexual lol.

[acealpaca]

Hello. Here is the intro to the blog!

Ao3 Account: AcePerson

Below are the fandoms I'm in!

Fandoms: Suits, Barbie, Supernatural, Oceans Trilogy, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, Bullet Train, Inglorious Basterds, The Nice Guys, Fight Club, LCDP (Money Heist), Prodigal Son, Good Omens, Criminal Minds, Marvel (MCU and series), Hannibal, Sherlock, Doctor Who, Broadchurch, Nimona, 9-1-1, White Collar, Ted Lasso, Hawaii 5-0 and David Tennant

Incorrect quotes

If you want to chat you can send a DM (I consider myself a friendly person) I accept prompts and asks! ☕

[bookwormthings1328]

Peter: I'm going to get the wedding cake.

Wade: perfect, while you do that I'll check on the ring bear

Peter:

Peter: You mean the ring bearER, right?

Wade: *sweating*

Peter: Wade, look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.

[trickarrows-bishop]

[thekaiqueen]

Clint, texting Kate: Hey, are you awake?

Kate: no

Clint: Dang

Kate: I'm asleep

Clint: Shoot

Clint: I knew it

Kate: Shhh you'll wake me up

Clint: Ohhhhh oops

Clint: Shhhhh...

[the-suicidal-lizard]

Trust

Peter: I trust Wade. Matt: You think he knows what he's doing? Peter: I wouldn't go that far.

[deliveryboysomewhatequaltoheaven]

Don’t do anything I would do, and definitely don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. There’s a little gray area in there and that’s where you operate.

Sun Wukong to MK

[wolfish-trickster]

Someone: harasses y/n

Loki sharpening his blades: you know the rules and so do I

[funnyincorrectmcu]

(Texting) Clint: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat? Steve: Hey! Language! Tony: Yeah. Watch your fucking language. Bruce: Who taught Clint the fuck word?? Nat: “The fuck word”. Peter: You realize you guys use the f word all the time, right? Clint: Oh my god he censored it. Nat: Say fuck, Peter. Clint: Yeah. Do it, kid. Tony: Do not let them influence you, Peter. Peter: … *Peter has left the group chat* Tony: Attaboy.

[eevylynn]

Peter 2: Did you finish your resume?

Peter 1: Perhaps.....

Peter 2: I feel like this is a no

Peter 3: Definitely sounds like a no

MJ: It's a no.