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alonetimelover · 1 year ago

Text

So High School - part 2

read part 1 ------》 here

pairing: tennis player!reader x Lando Norris

fc: Iga Świątek

summary: Lando keeps pursuing his attempts at scoring a date with THE YN YSN - to the enjoyment of his on-track besties. But nobody has better days on social media than his haters. And sometimes being passive is not an option - you need to silence them.

warnings: internet hate

F1 masterlist taglist

🏎🥎🏎🥎🏎🥎🏎🥎🏎🥎🏎🥎🏎🥎🏎🥎🏎🥎🏎🥎🏎🥎

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, danielricciardo, yourinstagram and 2 001 292 others

f1 Padel, tennis or maybe carting? Which of these sports are the best and worst to try for our drivers - Lando, Max, Fernando and Daniel, and our special guest at the British Grand Prix - YN YSN? Stay tuned and watch what they all were up to right before the Grand Prix start on Sunday!

view all 23 100 comments

ynsmybestie YN YNYNYNYN YSN

ynsmybestie she is finally AT THE RACE

landogirly yn's going to be lando's lucky charm or he's going to be so stressed it's all over

landonorris best challenge ever

⤷ oscarpiastri are you saying that because of what I think orr??

⤷ landonorris shhhh Osco

⤷ oscarpiastri you're very ungrateful to the person that gave you the place in this challenge

⤷ landonorris LOVE YOU OSCAR

danielricciardo how did we lose playing 4 against 1????

⤷ maxverstappen1 Because you couldn't stop talking!

⤷ fernandoalo_official We played against world No. 1. Maybe that's why. Oh, and landonorris couldn't stop tripping over his feet

⤷ landonorris thank you, my racing father. you embarrass me like my own father

fernandoalo_official Great playing and speaking with you, yourinstagram!

⤷ yourinstagram the pleasure was mine!!!! thank you for all the tips during the race 🧡

⤷ fernandoalo_official Any time! I hope you'll enjoy your time during the race and will come say hello!

ynsmymama not yn only responding to nando's comment

⤷ landogirly lando can do everything and he's still ignored

⤷ norizzfan well, let's have hope he can step up his game

comment liked by landonorris and 4022 others

⤷ ynsmyno1 not lando liking norrrizfan comment 💀

landofan77 not Oscar giving up this challenge so Lando could have a chance with yn

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f1gossippage

liked by landogirly, ynsmybestie and 40 292 others

f1gossippage A little story thanks to our followers from UK!

1st picture: Lando meeting some fans right before entering one of the London's restaurants (very chic and date-like outfit).

2nd picture: a fan caught Lando and some woman entering the photo booth together and stayed to take this photo! Looking rather cozy!

3rd picture: IG story from YN YSN deleted mere 2 minutes after posting! The outfit awfully similar to the one wore by Lando 😏

4th picture: Lando during today's stream "I just came back from the dinner, guys. let's chat" "yes, the date was amazing, thank you for asking!" "I've never said I was at the date. what do you mean?" "Oh no."

Could that mean something? New wag alert? Let's keep watching!

view all 1 088 comments

landogirly I mean it checks out but I can't believe that lando could get THE YN YSN... like let's be real

landogirly BYT if it's true... THE BEST COUPLE IN THE PADDOCK

ynsmybestie one time yn posts something not related to tennis and it gets deleted... and it's also A MAN 🤢

ynsmymama let it be true let it be true let it be true

landofan92 no way

landofan99 he did not bag a baddie like yn, no way

formula1fan93 yeah, no. that did not happened

ynysnfan833 ewwwwww get that away from me

ynysnfan911 really? an f1 driver? she could do much better

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mclaren

liked by yourinstagram, landonorris, oscarpiastri and 1 003 292 others

mclaren Our newest addition to the papaya family has arrived!!!! YN YSN (yourinstagram) - WTA No. 1 player has joined Lando and Oscar for their Silverstone fanzone hour! Tune in to our YouTube channel to follow it live!

view all 10 392 comments

landogirly look at lando being all smiley and giggly and blushy 🤭 he has the fattest crush on yn

landosarmyohmy PROTECT THEM AT ALL COST

ynsmybestie not yn saying "well, my favourite driver was and always will be Sebastian Vettel. Fernando is a close second" and then not wanting to say her third favourite!!!!

⤷ landogirly i bet she wanted to say lando (im delusional)

ynsmymama lando saying, "i don't care what people say about me as long as they're not bringing other people down with it. what you want to say about me - say it. and at the same time, you can be respectful about it, can't you?"

landofan99 BEST FANZONE IVE EVER ATTENDED

landoscarfan77 the more I see them interact the more I think there's something going on between them

⤷ ynsmybestie they do have some chemistry going on

⤷ landofan99 wasn't it confirmed that yn went on a date with lando?

⤷ ynsmybestie well... most likely, it was true, but there are no pictures of them together being at the same place

landofan729 LOOK. AT. THEM.

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ynupdates

liked by ynsmybestie, landogirly, danielricciardo and 8 393 others

ynupdates YN congratulating Lando Norris (F1 driver) for his podium finish at the Britidh Grand Prix! photo posted by Lando's father!

view all 638 comments

landogirly AHAHFIRKDNXJIWKSKD

landogirly fuck offfff

landogirly look at himmmm, crinkles by the eyes, hand placement, the JOY IN HIS EYES

ynsmybestie yn once again fulfilling the dreams of her fans

ynsmymama I wasn't on this really but... I SHIP IT

landoscarmyohmy but the video, THE VIDEO, how she just falls into his arms (as if she did that multiple times already), he's little "oh, hi" when she places her head on his chest, her quiet "congratulations, you did so good" and OSCAR in the background grinning like a devil

⤷ ynsmybestie was it also posted by lando's dad????

⤷ landoscarmyohmy yes, it was! he is the captain of this ship!

hater93 another one to put on the list of "seeing an f1 race to just find a driver dumb enough to go out with me"

hater993 why would I care man

hater839 lowlifes found each other

⤷ danielricciardo didn't know you met YN and Lando yourself

⤷ oscarpiastri oh yes, lowlifes of the best tennis player in the World right now and the guy who won an F1 race and is competing for a championship. such lowlifes

ynsmymama Daniel and Oscar backing Lando, THATS FREAKING RIGHT, THESE ARE MY DRIVERS

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landogirly

liked by ynsmybestie, ynsmymama and 7 493 others

landogirly LANDO AND HIS PARENTS ARE AT YN'S MATCH AT WIMBLEDON!!!!!!!!!!!!! it is happening my loves. IT. IS. HAPPENING.

view all 349 comments

ynupdates lucky charm?

ynsmymama please bring mother luck, please bring mother luck, please bring mother luck

landofan75 that man will be everywhere but at the sim room practicing his starts

landoscarmyohmy meeting the parents???????

⤷ ynsmybestie yn met lando's parents at the silverstone race!

landofan588 he looks so gooooooood *drooling*

landofan686 watched it and his dad smirking at lando after every time that lan cheered for yn!!!!!!!! that was everything to me. e v e r y t h i n g

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Twitch: Lando and Max talking and playing COD!

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yourinstagram

liked by landonorris, danielricciardo, oscarpiastri, lewishamilton and 810 292 others

yourinstagram trophies, cars, some love and nature

view all 18 494 comments

ynsmymama A MAN????????

ynsmymama a love letter

ynsmybestie she won wimbledon, she has A MAN, she is happy, she is in love, SHE IS EVERYTHING HE'S JUST KEN

landogirly no fuckin way no fuckin way no fuckin way

landogirly HOW DID IT HAPPEN?????

landogirly also not you trying to soft launch when we all know who that man is

norizzlan lando norris wrotes love letters??????? who is this man

landoscarfan85 WTF

danielricciardo i didn't know you loved OUR picture this much

⤷ yourinstagram how could I not? ;)

oscarpiastri happy to see my stickers being used properly

lewishamilton watching you win more and more titles is truly inspiring! you are the force, YN!

⤷ yourinstagram thank you, seven-time world champion, record-breaking driver and my favourite dog dad!

⤷ lewishamilton waiting for you to break more records! roscoe is waiting for more belly rubs!

fernandoalo_official come to the race when i'm on the podium, princesa!

⤷ yourinstagram i'll blow max's tyres and we're good

⤷ maxverstappen1 hey! i thought we were friends

landonorris keeping cuddles for noir!

⤷ yourinstagram snacks are better to bribe him

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f1gossippage

liked by landofan85 and 20 393 others

f1gossippage Lando Norris seems to be enjoying his free weekend accompanied by his new beau - YN YSN!

view all 1 074 comments

landogirly fucking disgusting to take pics while people are having such a PRIVATE moment

ynsmymama "new beau" google YN and call her accordingly to her accomplishments

ynsmybestie creepy to post these type of pictures

landoscarfan85 not a moment without a camera pointing right at them.... disgusting

landofan854 wine, dine & shine

landofan664 can't get used to lando being all lovey dovey

hater85 waiting for her to flop just like him

hater92 focus on your job

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landonorris

liked by yourinstagram, oscarpiastri, danielricciardo and 1 001 399 others

landonorris new beau, focusing on my job and looking for a better man

view all 24 430 comments

landogirly HAHAHAHHAAHHAHHAHHAH

landogirly that's the biggest "fuck you" to the haters that i've ever seen

ynsmymama oh i love him, your honour

norizzlan someone found his rizz and used it perfectly

landoscarmyohmy using haters favourite words to make your relationship public? ICONIC

ynsmybestie loved the soft launch for the first 8 pictures and then BOOM - the queen's here

danielricciardo no problem for taking those photos, no problem!

⤷ landonorris what photos?

⤷ yourinstagram tickets for the Olympics matches are waiting for you, danny

⤷ danielricciardo you are my best friend

oscarpiastri YOU'RE WELCOME

lewishamilton treat her right

⤷ landonorris 🫡

fernandoalo_official yourinstagram, will i see you more on the track?

⤷ landonorris apparently we don't have time to visit each other at our jobs so....

⤷ yourinstagram i sent you tickets for my next match

carlossainz55 5th picture is your bedroom

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should I add more drama to this or just leave it here?

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#f1 x reader #formula 1 x reader #lando norris x reader #lando norris x you #lando norris fic #lando norris social media au #lando norris one shot #lando norris fanfic #lando norris fluff

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evieelyzabethh · 8 months ago

Note

Can I request modern au viktor dating headcanons (perhaps streamer au where viktor is dating streamer reader) 👉👈

streamerau!Viktor whose girlfriend starts out as a relatively small creator. Your streams don't get a lot of reach, but it's never bothered you much anyway. You did it more for the passion of gaming rather than making serious money off it. Your set up had been customized and built prior to the idea of even getting a twitch account, you already had countless hours logged into your Minecraft and Sims 4 worlds, as well as having a pretty lengthy collection of games all on your own

streamerau!Viktor who is the reason you even start. One day, he jokingly teased that with how many hours and how much money you had put into your hobby, you might as well try and make some money off it. He's very aware of what it takes to go viral, a pretty face, and you have the prettiest one he's ever seen. He is also quite confident in your skills to go viral. You have the personality, you have the skills, you have the knowledge. He's not even a gamer himself and he still enjoys watching you play and hearing all the interesting fun facts and history that you know about.

streamerau!Viktor who is such a visual opposite to his girlfriend. Part of the differences are played up for the camera, the comically pink and purple set up, the light-up headphones, even the type of content you create, spending less time in COD lobbies and more on cheap cozy games on Steam. He hardly ever steps into your recording office, fearing his tall, lanky, and dark demeanor may come off as some creepy ghost in the corner of your pastel-led room.

This isn't to say you only play those games, but that is simply what gets the views and is the least hostile space. When you do venture out of the typical cozy game aesthetic, it typically adventure puzzle games, like Tomb Raider or Uncharted, or maybe a story-based horror game like Mouthwashing or Until Dawn. In the very early days of your streaming adventure, you and Viktor would play vintage games from your collection, like Mario Kart or Mortal Kombat on your N64 or Sonic on your Sega Genesis. Once you start getting traction, he asks for them to be deleted. He's doesn't want his face all over the internet nor his reactions.

streamerau!Viktor who is quite aggressive when he plays games. He is the first to get loud, the first to blame the controller, the first to claim his screen was lagging and that's why he lost. He is a bit of a sore loser. He also just isn't a fan of games that don't require some sort of skill or technique. He hates luck-based games, or games that depend heavily on rng. Y'all played the first FNAF game ONCE and he lost it because Chica hung around the door so he couldn't open it to alleviate his battery usage and was incredibly pissed when he lost because of that.

streamerau!Viktor who is more into more card games (my personal headcanon is that he is a great Spades partner) but still tunes into every single one of your streams. He thinks it's funny to leave very obvious 'pro-tips' like "don't mine at night with nothing but a wood sword" or "maybe try killing the creepers" or "next time, you should do a back flip off the ledge". Though he doesn't play with you, he does get alluded to in passing, typically by Grim rather than his actual name. The nickname came from one of your Sims streams where you laughed about how much your boyfriend looked like the Grim Reaper and then everyone started calling him that until it eventually got shortened to just Grim. At some point, someone dug through the archives to try and find him. The old streams were long gone at this point, but Viktor had somehow snuck into the corner of a few videos.

Speaking of which, Shadow Man Viktor definitely became a meme on the internet after he was spotted, specifically to that one Berleezy audio (IT IS HOT AS HELL IN THIS FUNKY ASS, HOT ASS ROOM IM IN...IS THAT THE GRIM REAPER???). He doesn't find out about it until you tell him. Viktor is thoroughly not a social media guy; he often gets confused when you make internet references on the stream and asks about what they mean later. That or he quietly texts you "I'm employed, what does that mean?" He never moved over to shorter form content when Vine and TikTok got really popular, and he definitely brags about having a longer attention span because of it. He would be more annoyed with the whole ordeal if his face wasn't obscured, but you can't tell who he is by the low-quality stills. This being said, your followers anxiously await the heavily teased boyfriend reveal.

#arcane x reader #arcane fanfic #arcane x you #arcane #eviesmadness🪻#viktor arcane #viktor x reader #arcane headcanon #streamerau🎮

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ooffmlsorry · 2 years ago

Text

Bringing Law Home for a Family Holiday

Readers' Note: Reader has a large and generally good but overbearing family. Only happy things in this, little to no angst!

A/N: Every holiday I get struck with the desire to write my latest blorbo coming home with their s/o for the holidays. I don't have time to crack out 10-15k words so this is probs gonna be more stream of consciousness but it'll get the point across.

I've been imagining how tense the travel to Law's s/o's house is because God forbid y'all be late because Law wants to make a good impression no matter how many times you explain it's a very loose 4 p.m. arrival time.

You've been dating for long enough that you think it's reasonable for him to meet your family (that was enough to make Law's heart flutter and then start hammering...could it be you're just as serious about him as he is about you?)

"My aunt showed up at noon and my cousin's probably not going to be here until after dark, really it's fine!" You'd insist. "Besides, the people that show up on time are the ones that end up having to go back out because someone forgot something!"

And of course Law would say "that's fine." With a such a stubborn and determined tone. Being on time or a few minutes early is better than being late! Suddenly your man is a rule follower! 🤭Suddenly you can picture Law as he was a kid studious and button-ed up in his little doctor's uniform. It's almost kind of cute if he wasn't so nervous.

The closest thing to family Law has is Bepo, Shachi and Penguin. Not since the Donquixote family has Law had anything to do with that word and he's so nervous he feels sick. For Law this translate to acting like he has the world's biggest cactus shoved up his ass, and you know that so you try not to take his coolness personally.

Holding his hand helps a little though. You ignore how shaky and sweaty it is.

He's feeling a lot of big feelings right now, poor guy.

He insisted on you giving him a "family tree" when he realized how big your family is and a list of things not to accidentally mention or do. He's been studying it for days, re-reading it over and over obsessively.

The fact that he's a pirate is fine, which takes a lot of pressure off. You come from a family full of pirates, so you swear Law will fit right in. Although you warn him your grandfather's probably going to start reminiscing about how he knew Gol D. Roger as a kid (which no one knows if that's actually true) and ranting about the young pirates these days.

You'd walk up to your family home high on a hill over looking the sea. From several yards away you can already hear music. You realize as you get closer it's more like you're dragging Law more than he's walking with you.

It's subconscious lol. I promise you he's not doing it on purpose. As soon as you notice it he speaks, "I'm fine."

Poor Traffy is so pale!

His tone dares you to question him, almost as if to actually say "I'm fine, if I wasn't I wouldn't be here Y/N. Please trust me to be honest with you about how I'm feeling." But that's a lot of words for someone who's mouth is cotton dry. He's trying his best, so you give him a quick kiss on the cheek for courage and walk up to the house together.

The first thing your family comments on when you open the door is how early you are despite the fact that it's three minutes to 4:00.

"We weren't expecting Y/N for another hour!" Your aunt winks at Law and nudges him, no introduction, no nothing, and says "you must really be something special if you can get them here to early!"

Despite Law's best efforts, having one of your family members immediately point out his supposed specialness to you makes blush and stutter.

It doesn't matter how awkward his no response of blinking at your aunt was because she's already gone flitting around with an arm full of what your family calls "the good plates."

You pull Law down to whisper in his ear, "told you we'd be early," you giggle.

It's not the nicest house, but it is big, and warm, and festive. Just standing in the doorway taking it in Law's struck with the remembrance of home. He tries to only focus on the present, not Swallow Island, Spider Miles, or even Flevance, your home is good..for today. But tomorrow he'll back at his home: the Polar Tang.

You introduce him to what little family is already there. Your heart squeezes at the way Law awkwardly waves at the baby your cousin's bouncing on his lap and the surprise that quickly turns into a soft smile that spreads across his lips when the baby coos back.

He meets your grandpa, who appraises him very officially. You swear to God Law's holding his breath as the stout man with a peg leg circles him with his arms behind his back. "Trafalgar Law, hmm..." he says very seriously. "You know back in my day pirates didn't all these tattoos to prove they were tough."

"I heard your day was quite a long time ago," Law says almost automatically. In for a penny, in for a pound, he doubles down, adding "sir" at the end.

That would be your boyfriend hehe. Too sharp for his own good.

Of course that's what your grandfather likes. He shakes Law's hand and pulls him into a crushing hug. Your grandpa promises later he's got words for him (ie. the shovel talk). It's a little disturbing how comfortable Law feels knowing he'll be threatened with an unspeakably awful death later. That's the most familiar thing that has happened all day. lol

But he knows the person he needs to impart the best impression on is your grandmother. You don't think you've ever seen Law so perfectly polite in your life....which makes your grandmother howl with laughter! "My ass whooping days are over, boy! Relax!" Her frail hands clutch her stomach as she laughs. She wipes a tear from her eyes, "I thought you said he was a pirate?!" She pats Law on the cheek like he's a sweet little boy (because at her old age 26 is a little boy) and gives it a squeeze. And because it's your grandma, he lets her.

You have to hide your laughter behind your hand.

"He's a sweet boy, Y/N," she says to you. "And so handsome! Where were all the good-looking men like him when I was at sea?"

"I killed 'em all!" Your grandpa yells across the house.

And just like that, Law's in your grandmother's good graces. Of course you knew he would be.

True to your word earlier, you get sent in to town to pick up a short list of last minute things. It's a nice moment to breathe. As soon as you're far enough from the house you wrap your arms around him and kiss him deeply.

"I'm so happy they like you," you say quietly once you come up for air. You don't tease him about how strange it is to see him hoping for someone's approval like you would in most circumstances. Instead you feel yourself melt, "I knew they would, but now you believe me?"

"They like me for now," he says because god forbid he go easy on himself.

"You're not as hard to love as you think you are, Law." You press another kiss to his lips.

(A/N: ooh chile lemme tell you, for saying that right there that man is going to romantically rail you within an inch of your life when y'all get back to the ship. That is the only way I can convey to you how much you saying that means to him. He's speechless.)

By time y'all get back there are a lot more people here and it's a lot louder. Your brother asks Law about a rash on elbow (at the dinner table no less, but hey these are pirates!) and he actually gives him advice.

Law meets your little cousins, who ask him a million questions including but not limited to:

"Why do you wears that funny looking hat?"

"Are you actually a surgeon?"

"Does getting a tattoo hurt?"

"Can you give me a tattoo?"

"How many Marines have you killed?"

"Are the Straw Hat Pirates really that strong?"

"Do you really have a polar bear on your ship?"

"Are you and Y/N ever gonna have a baby?"

To which Law responds:

"Who said it was funny looking?"

"Yeah."

"I don't know. I don't feel pain." you thought this man would take their questions seriously?

"Surgeons aren't allowed to do that. My hands will fall off if I do."

"Definitely more than you."

"As strong as they are stupid."

"Yeah, he's our navigator."

".........I think I heard someone calling you from the kitchen."

Your little cousins think "he's weird funny." He does "surgery" on the dolls your cousins offer up to him and thoroughly enjoy the weird monstrosities he creates. And Your moody teenage nephew deems Law "cool."

Your mom insists Law's too skinny for his own good and piles more food on his plate. "If you're going to survive out there you need some meat on your bones! I wanna see you here next year, Trafalgar."

Law almost chokes. Your mom already wants him back next year. He was expecting to have to get her approval somehow too, but she's accepted him immediately. "All I needed to know is if you make my little Y/N happy!" Your mom explains while hugging you, "And look how happy they are!"

And your old man, a pirate captain in his own right, several beers deep, slings his arm over Law's shoulder. "You're the one that's got that big ol' bounty, huh?" Before Law can fully answer, he continues on drunkenly, "that means you probably looted enough to cover your own wedding, right? Cause I'm sure's shit not." God bless Law for taking it with a grain of salt and taking him over to a couch. "That means you can marry 'em if ya want, as'long as I don' havta pay none. But if you break their heart I'll turn ya in myself...goddamn Marines...making me a traitor..." he says until his words turn into drunk muttering.

"That's your blessing in case you were wondering," your mom sighs. "I know you didn't ask but that was it. That man is fine with anything as long as he doesn't have to pay for it."

"You get my blessing because you helped clean up!" Your grandma pipes in. "Nothing more valuable than a man that knows how clean up after himself!"

I don't know how many times Law is rendered speechless for a moment. Was it that easy or was your family truly that accepting? In a handful of hours he's been completely welcomed and they want him to come back next year, to marry you? It's dizzying, but in a...hopeful way? Because...he wants it to happen too...if he's lucky enough to come back next year as your husband.

At the end of the night, you and Law are sent on your way with tons of food to bring back to Heart Pirates, and whether he likes it or not your mom and your grandma each press a kiss to Law's cheek.

You walk back down the hill together.

"It was good to see them again," you say. "Was that too much?"

"No," Law says. "I'm happy."

A/N: so yeah, I just had that bumbling around in my head today. I hope it was fluffy enough for ya! 😘

#one piece fluff #one piece x you #law x reader #trafalgar law x reader #one piece #trafalgar law

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silverlining-ships · 9 months ago

Text

Music comms are CLOSED!! Check out the waitlist here!!

Ok y'know what, screw it. My brain seems to require three-four pieces at one time (genuinely cannot figure out why that is), and with the fact I only have two queued up right now and the game I'm composing for doesn't need any tracks at the moment, I'm getting composer's block again. So we're OPENING my music requests!!

I'm actually stunned at how many people seemed interested in getting a piece of soundtrack music for their f/o. I'm opening it to non-mutuals, and it's totally free! If you're concerned about paying/tipping for work, I'm always happy to receive content for my selfship, but I will not accept any money, and there's no pressure to tip content anyway. Again, this is for fun!

This is how it works:

Fill out this google form with the title of your ship, some songs you like, instruments, etc etc.

You can message on Tumblr or Discord (@/slipperson on Discord) on top of submitting the form too! I'll reach out myself once I get started on your piece.

I'll sketch out a draft, which is exactly like sketching out a basic pose for art - it'll typically only use piano/minor percussion. Sometimes I'll even give a simple concept before I flesh out a draft. I'll send it to you for approval.

If changes are needed, I'll refine the draft and re-update. If not, I'll go on to fleshing out the instrumental - this means adding instruments, changing volume (for example, in my first example, I used a lot of "dynamics"/volume changes to simulate the swelling of instruments). This is like adding the flat colors in a piece of art!

I'll send it to you again - I'll make changes upon your request, but if approved, I'll finally go ahead and mix the final draft. This means putting it through an audio program (audacity if you're curious!) and polishing the sound. This is like rendering the lighting!

After it's done, I'll send it to you for once last listen. Upon approval, I'll post it to Soundcloud, link it on Tumblr, and tag you in the post!

Important bits:

No comship/proship/aged up-or-down/RPF ships. Live action characters are fine as long as it's not the actual person. Familial/platonic ships are totally okay!

If you are a minor/ageless blog, I'm willing to write a piece for familial/platonic content, but not QPR/romantic.

Downtime is 1-2 months after I first open your request. I may finish it sooner, but no later than 2 months. This is because music generally takes awhile--30 seconds of music can take me 4-5 hours to concept! I also tend to work on 3-4 pieces of music at a time.

I will give frequent updates. Don't be afraid to reach out if you're curious on the status!

My work is never cleared to be used commercially or in AI programs. We're a bunch of selfshippers on Tumblr, so I know we all hate AI, but it's worth the mention. I tend to be strict on copywrite - it'll stay under my name, all rights reserved - however, you are free to use your piece wherever you'd like as long as it's not commercial use, used in a monetized campaign/video/form of media, and not used in AI.

I may put these tracks on a streaming service at a later date - not on Spotify, as the service is TERRIBLE with allowing their work to be remixed into AI. Something like Bandcamp or Soundcloud for Artists. If you are uncomfortable with this, please let me know.

Examples:

I will have my queue/completed list on my carrd here.

Thank you so much for your interest!! I'm actually so stunned I got so much love for this, and I'm excited to celebrate your ships with you!

heart border

#self ship #fictional other #yumeship #self ship community #silver musics #silver talks #SoundCloud #love letters 🎵

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ladysomething · 9 months ago

Note

The amount of lestappen content we've gotten lately is amazing!

I've reread wygig like 4 times now I love it so much

Any chance of another snippet before Wednesday????

are you ... not sick of wygig? I did not realise it had that level of re-readability. but I'm delighted that it does!!

probably no more snippets .... I think ...

oh actually!!!

I started dicking around with a random concept after seeing @hotmandrivefast's recent fan art of lestappen kissing during Max's stream, so you can have everything I've written from that so far.

ridiculous vibes as is becoming my brand when I'm not writing wygig lol.

The problem, Charles thinks, is that he and Max have been together too long.

A secondary, equally alarming problem, is that Charles has also clearly let Max have too much sex with him. The novelty has worn off.

He’s boring.

And how exactly has Charles come to these conclusions?

Because he is laid out on the bed of their hotel room, shirtless, and Max is just . . . ignoring him. For his games.

His computer is propped up on the bed, and he’s sitting on the floor, frantically poking at his controller and shouting in dismay.

Charles frowns at him.

Maybe he needs to break up with Max, just for like five minutes, so that Max appreciates him more. It’s slightly drastic, maybe, but there is literally nothing wrong with the way Charles looks. Actually, he gets endless compliments on his body and face.

He is so fuckable.

He’s so fuckable it’s like a selling point.

So why is staring at his loser boyfriend, pointedly not being fucked right now?

It’s atrocious. It’s terrible. It’s a state of affairs that Charles finds, frankly, unacceptable.

He gets up on his knees, crawling over to kneel behind Max’s computer, and then pokes his lip out into a pout.

Max, like, barely glances up at him, gaze lingering on his bare chest for only a few seconds instead of the usual ten, and then he looks back down to his game, groaning loudly.

“Yeah, I know,” he grunts into his microphone. “Sorry—got distracted for a second. Yeah, I know.”

Charles frowns, which quickly turns into a pout again. He taps the top of Max’s laptop pointedly, and mouths, “Max.”

Max flicks his eyes up to him again, then says, “Guys, once second.”

He lifts his hands to the headset, presses whatever buttons he needs to press, then pushes the mic away from his mouth.

“Everything okay?” he asks, not anywhere near concernedly enough for Charles.

Charles blinks, thrown off by Max not immediately devouring him.

“I want to cum,” he announces, deciding that a no nonsense approach will work best.

Max stares at him, clearly perplexed, and then says, “Okay?”

Charles huffs. There is something seriously wrong here. Maybe he should revisit the idea of breaking up with Max for a few minutes.

“So?” Charles asks pointedly.

“So . . . what? You don’t need my permission.”

Max is an idiot. No, maybe Charles is an idiot, for falling in love with an idiot.

He retreats to the bathroom to lick his wounds and stroke his humbled ego, but he doesn’t cum.

He has way more pride than that.

The next problem Charles encounters is that now he’s come to see the original problem, he sees it everywhere.

He texts Max to ask him on a date on Wednesday, and Max says he’s busy, sends a love heart emoji, and then an hour later Charles gets a notification saying that a Redline stream has started. So what if he always streams on a Wednesday? Surely one time he could skip it.

He surprises Max by coming around, bringing Max’s favourite take out for lunch and a brand new toy for the cats to keep them distracted while they have sex, but Max says he can’t hang out that day because he’s in the middle of a stream. So what if the stream is for charity? Charles is still banished to the lounge to eat and play with the cats alone.

He shows up for their breakfast date, ready to burn the eggs and bake a doughy croissant, but Max answers the door with an apologetic look saying that he’s got to spend a few hours in the sim. And so what if the RB20 sucks and he’s trying to hold onto his Championship lead?

Charles has needs, goddammit. Vigorous needs that involve him regularly drooling into a pillow and being fucked so good he can’t see, or fucking Max until he cries and begs to be allowed to cum. He doesn’t really care which way it goes, as long as someone’s dick is up someone’s ass.

And they have a healthy sex life. They have a great sex life, based on the way their friends judge them for being unable to keep their hands off each other, or the times they’ve been walked in on, or the way Max had to put a firm ban on sex during race weekends when Charles had been uncomfortable in the car one too many times.

He just wants more. He wants so much more, all the time, he wants to sleep with Max’s dick inside him and he wants to have dinner while Max is kneeling and slowly sucking his cock, he wants to have a plug left in his ass so he’s ready for Max at any time and he wants to fill Max with so much cum it leaks out of him.

He’s ravenous, hungry, a black hole of want, and he knows none of that is reasonable but he wants it anyway.

Begrudgingly, he settles for sex when they can manage it, but right now they could manage it a whole lot more.

#anon ask #lestappen fic #streaming fic

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sugurumybeloved · 11 months ago

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⤷ Who is that fine babe?

gojo x female streamer <3

a/n: this was a lovely request from my mootie @ilovelinkk , tyy 💗

Today, you were setting up to begin a stream. You were Gojo’s girlfriend, and you two originally met from him watching one of your streams. That was about 3 years ago when you were just starting off as a streamer! Now, you’re almost famous, doing sponsorships and brand deals. He was honestly proud to have you by his side, even though people didn’t know him like that.

Gojo was taking a nap in the room next to you. You heard his snoring through the wall as you began your stream. “Hey everyone, it’s me, (name) and today.. we’re just gonna chill.” A lot of people started joining your stream, the comments flooding with hi’s and I miss you’s. You were on stream for about an hour, just talking and rambling. But one message caught your eye.

feelingd0wntdy: do you have a roommate 😀

You read the message with a slight smile. “No, I don't have a roommate. I live with my boyfriend.”

Then, the chat started blowing up. Everyone was requesting to see him, a bunch of donations were coming in like crazy. You sighed, pulling out your phone to call Gojo.

“Why’re you calling me when you’re right next door?” He says, groggily. You can tell he just woke up. “Can you come to my room please, chat wants to see you.” You also could tell that he was smiling, because of his change of tone. “Coming!”

Not even a second later, Gojo was standing in your doorway. He was wearing a white shirt and hello kitty pajama bottoms. Your chat blew up even more, everyone asking his name. “Don’t be shy, come closer.” He shyly walked up to your chair, standing behind it. “Um, hi guys my name is Gojo.” Your chat kept spamming “IN GOJO WE TRUST ‼️” and other funny phrases. After a while, people started to pay donations and ask questions ; keep in mind, your monitor reads the questions out loud.

“Well, funfettispaghetti, my girlfriend and I have been dating for 4 years!” Gojo exclaims with a smile, his hand squeezing your cheeks together. It almost felt like he was the star of the stream, which made you happy. He never liked to show his face on your streams because of past incidents. There’s times where you’ve been doxxed, hacked, your information stolen and death threats coming your way. But it was a part of maturing and realizing that dumb people do dumb shit. And you are far from dumb.

There was a silence for about 10 minutes, before one crazy donation came through: “marshmallow_heaven donated $50: how much money does it take for him to twerk on stream 🥺” Gojo looked at the camera with his eyes wide and mouth agape. He slowly turned his head to you, closing his mouth. “What is wrong with your chat.” “I DON’T KNOW!” You said, dying of laughter. Red heat rose to his face as he kept staring at the camera, his mouth in a straight line. “Babe.. now they’re all telling me to oil up.” “WHAT!?”

[BONUS]

For your next stream, you and Gojo reacted to edits from your discord server. They were surprisingly good! Except for the one where it had Gojo twerking in the beginning.. (he did it for $5..)

dt list: @1-800reki @ashlovelys @crowatemitsuri @psuedosugu @starykari @pinkbowwhitebow @kitkat-moon @ilovelinkk @istanstraykidss @zellons @misthashiragf @mjustag1rl :3

works by sugurumybeloved© - do not copy or repost my works without proper credit or permission.

(Reblogs and likes are greatly appreciated!)

#lia cooks!#lia’s fics! 🍁#gojo x reader #requests?

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cleolinda · 3 months ago

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Weekend links, April 27, 2025

My posts

I have had the Month of a Thousand Paper Cuts (pictured: me) and I am, in fact, having a bad pain day today, BUT! I may be moving forward with SH2 commentary recording. (Commentary upwriting for a video that didn't exist has been slowly moving along.) OBS still hates me but we're gonna do it ugly (it's much less ugly than it was). Fuck it, ball, etc. Ian's next stream will be this Wednesday, 4/30, I think.

(I am still trying to figure out who my unexpected blorbo in the Silent Hill 2 situation is.)

Oh! I should mention! One of my doctors finally said, "Uh, you don't have to make an appointment and go to an allergist, Zyrtec is over the counter now," so I am finally Doing Something about my allergies (hypothesis: year-round, Dust and The Outdoors). This means that I may be able to write about perfume again soon. I was reminded of this by these Fragrantica reviews of Mugler's Alien, of which I have a sample. Previously, I wrote about Mugler's Angel, after my entire house stopped smelling like it.

Reblogs of interest

I follow Shirley Mansion on YouTube, where she posts like it's Instagram (basically, my subscriptions tab is video game playthroughs, Josh Johnson, Watcher, Dua Lipa's thirst traps, and Shirley), and when I tell you she could not give less of a FUCK what the Daily Mail thinks of her looks

Use these blacklists to block AI overviews and AI images in google searches and set yourself free

For National Poetry Month, Patricia Smith’s “Ethel’s Sestina”

Darian Rodriguez Mederos' bubble-wrap painting "The Wait"

The tale of art forger Wolfgang Beltracchi ("he said that none of his forgeries are copies, they’re all original works that the famous artists could have painted")

Emerald (and, separately, diamond) spectacles from 17th century India

Ray Harryhausen's stop-motion effects from The Golden Voyage Of Sinbad (1973)

The history of coffee in Islam, or, the best rom-com title I've ever heard

"ranking the best things I have heard surgeons say mid-surgery"

I don't know what's happening here, but it has extreme 1999 vibes.

This is either an albino deer or a magical White Stag, depending on your point of view

Zines: What Pelican Eat

@fialovart: some lovely beetle art

@endivinity: A saguaro dragon

Great will be your reward in whale heaven

Okay but that first dog though

Poll: Have you experienced Naruto

I don't know what y'all have been doing to My (MY) Little Ponies but you need to stop it right now

THERAPY UNICORN

Video

I always look forward to Josh Johnson's Tuesday uploads, but I've watched his new hour-long set about the all-female Blue Origins trip to space (?) three times already. Whenever he starts doing physical comedy with the stool, it's over for me.

A genius Coca-Cola Bear performer

I tagged this "live footage of the week I have had"

How to style a Hawaiian shirt with a suit

"Mic'ing my stompy kitty"

A ghost photoshoot

The sacred texts

Describe your perfect date

reblog if its friday and you made it

take me to snurch (snail church)

Personal tag of the week

Honestly, I don't even know. And when I don't know, I just say "cats."

#weekend links #linkspam

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merbear25 · 1 year ago

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The image of us (Yandere! Caesar)

You just wanted to connect with people. The interests that you couldn't really share with anyone in real life kept you feeling locked up within your own mind. An online community - your online community - was a type of safe haven, but even through all of the comradery, you’d unknowingly put a target on yourself.

a/n: I'm crazy about him in the least healthy was possible.

CW: NSFW, MDNI, fem!reader, Modern AU, Yandere themes (parasocial relationship, stalking, manipulating into sex, threats to reader’s personal safety), vaginal penetration, filmed sex, rough sex

The seemingly endless support came through the chat the longer you streamed—generous amounts of donations, albeit sporadic, were never left unthanked or unappreciated. Such support only encouraged you to spend more time online—glued to your screen whether it was on the streaming platform or your blog. The constant influx of acceptance was what kept you afloat.

Streaming a playthrough called the most attention to your rising online presence, yet your heart laid with your blog. Despite the outgoing appearance you kept up on camera, deep down you craved a bit of solitude. Allowing yourself to sit comfortably behind your blog, answer questions at your own pace, write your analyses on your favorite characters, shows, and whatever sparked your interest created an environment which was less pressurized.

You were tossing around the idea of cross promotion. Thinking that the increase, potentially even a spike, in numbers would open the floodgates of donations. Admittedly, the attention, no matter how surface level, brought a smile to your face. Even if that joy was skin deep, it was intoxicating to an extent—leaving you wanting, needing more and more. However, the sense of privacy you wanted to maintain was just barely keeping you from biting the bullet.

The viewers, your followers, were secured behind a screen regardless of what platform you showcased yourself on. Letting your personality run more freely through your posts, you frequently engaged with ask games which granted your followers a better opportunity to get to know you.

“Hiiiiii!! 4 please!” A fun, light-hearted question sent straight to your inbox.

Nothing that required much thought. “I’m a sucker for romance movies. Such a hopeless romantic and love the idea of being swept off my feet.” As you posted your response, glimmers of finding that special someone phased in and out.

The hours passed before you realized—cuing you up to start your evening stream. As the viewers came pouring in, commenting on your gameplay, and scattering donations, the attention never failed to give you a confidence boost.

Putting on a pretty face for the camera sometimes meant giving them a version of yourself that you weren’t even sure was real. You found purpose in it nonetheless.

“What was the last movie you watched?” Chimed in with the jingle you’d assigned to text to speech.

An easy answer. “Airplane! It’s an oldie but a goldie.” With the comments coming, some saying how much they love that movie and others stating that the humor doesn’t hold up, you kept your reactions light-hearted—humorous even.

“No romance movie?” The next one came in from the same user. That question seemed just a bit specific, but you rationalized that to paranoia trying to best you.

Not allowing it to derail the conversation you were having with the rest of the chat, a nonchalant ‘Nah, not recently’ came out.

With the stream coming to an end, the chat flooded with goodbyes and see you next stream. When you signed off with a bright smile on your face, as soon as you signed off and covered the web camera, the high began dwindling.

There was a certain rush you felt when you were on camera, one that no post you made could ever compete with.

Unwinding after a soothing bath, you flipped on 50 First Dates and mouthed your favorite parts just like you did the night before. You’d slipped into a deep sleep before it ended, missing the ping on your phone.

—------------------------------------------------

“If you’re still doing it, can I ask number 12?”

You blinked at it, thinking that you didn’t exactly have a routine. The one you did have heavily involved your streams. You noted the things that were consistent: getting a coffee, cooking for yourself, home exercises.

Later that day you posted a photo of your regular order while at your favorite cafe—a dash of cinnamon sprinkled on top to stand it apart from other lattes.

Faint hissing had you looking around the coffeeshop. No one else seemed to notice the sounds, though, and they faded shortly after.

With two hours until streaming, your journey home didn’t take you long. Scrolling through your feed, a notification popped up in your inbox. The faint hissing returned as you read:

“What’s your favorite coffee place?”

The question went unanswered.

That same happy-go-lucky smile was painted on once the camera started rolling.

It must have been a coincidence. Even so, that coincidence was still sending a shiver down your spine hours later.

The night was still young, but you couldn’t really be bothered staying up with your thoughts. You called in early, that same noise from earlier visited you, drifting in and out.

—------------------------------------------------

Your head still needed clearing, even after a restful night. The cool breeze and morning sun aided your jog. Passing through the streets, your tunnel vision attempted to block out the world around you.

Turning a corner, you accidentally bumped into a man. Fumbling an apology, you instinctively checked if he was okay.

The glare he held could’ve burned a hole right through your core, but after those piercing gold eyes scanned your face, his scowl softened.

After a faint huff, his demeanor did a 180. “Don’t worry about it! Accidents happen.”

His eyes ran over your body, soaking in each finite detail etched into you. A shiver ran down your spine the longer your eyes lingered on his. With such unique features, you couldn’t help but find a certain appeal to him.

A sly grin slowly stretched across his face, breaking the trance you were caught in. Before you scampered off, he took a risk in asking, “Can I give you my number?”

Rising heat prickled your cheeks. You nodded and whipped out your phone, watching his long fingers linger on the screen.

“I look forward to hearing from you.” He flashed a charming smile before continuing on his way.

Flinging the door open to your apartment, you plopped on your bed, eyeing the new contact ‘Caesar’ in your phone. Not wanting to come off as desperate, you took a couple hours to text him.

Rewriting that first message, the overthinking of each word and tone they could display was putting more pressure on you than necessary.

“Hey, it’s the klutz from earlier!” You took a deep breath and sent it. Twiddling your thumbs as you waited for a response, you worried if the quirky way of referring to yourself wasn’t at all funny or cute.

With the buzzing signaling a response, the backlight illuminated the relief on your face.

—------------------------------------------------

Each message sent then after felt easy—hitting it off like this was surreal. You had never really gotten along with someone so well so quickly, nearly effortlessly.

The days following your first encounter helped nurture your feelings for him. Attentive, charming, the way he expressed interest in you: how could you not want to explore your relationship with him?

You put your heart on the line and invited him out on a date. “A woman who isn’t afraid to take charge. I like that about you.”

With a select few to share your excitement with, you popped by to see your friend who lived in the area. You both spent time gossiping, drinking a bit, and catching up. Seeing as you had waited a while to get back into the dating scene, she wanted to know all about the guy you were talking to, which you gladly informed her on.

The sun had long since set, signaling for you to head home. With the walk being much too far to take alone in the dark, catching the bus at the stop a couple of streets over appeared to be your safest option.

The echoing of your heels clicking on the pavement created an emptiness within the crowded city. Soothing your rising stress, you shot a text over to Caesar, letting him know you were heading home as he’d requested.

Nearing the bus stop, you jumped from the sound of metal falling. Peering down the alley, you thought it best not to investigate, instead hurrying forward. Rushing past the townhouses as fast as you could, you told yourself the bright streetlamp the bus stop sat under would offer a sense of security.

With the flood lights out front being set off by you, each house drew more attention to the woman who was alone and defenseless. Looking over your shoulder in hopes that you’d be met with nothing but the city, the backyard flood lights from the third house behind you went off. Slowing your pace at first, when the next bulb from the back flickered on, panic clouded your mind.

You thought it might be better to try running, but due to your heels, you wouldn’t be able to outrun whomever was following you.

When that familiar hiss crept in, you fumbled with your phone to call your friend. As it rang, the hissing grew louder and the lights from the houses you’d rushed past barreled towards you. The wind was picking up, swirling around your feet and tangling your hair.

You refused to face what was coming for you, fearing that what you would see would be your last.

“Hello?”

A final gale wind forced over you, taking your breath with it momentarily

“Hello, (y/n), are you there? Is everything okay?”

“C-can you just stay on the phone with me until I get home?”

—------------------------------------------------

“Hey, have you arrived home yet?”

“Did you make it home safely?”

The repeated pings stirred you awake, but the ringing gave you more of a reason to give this person attention.

Giving them a groggy ‘Hello?’, you rubbed your eyes as Caesar expressed his concerns.

“You didn’t tell me when you got home. I was worried something happened to you.”

“Sorry, I…something weird happened and I was too shaken up to remember.”

The silence felt tense. “Were you hurt?”

“No! Nothing happened. I was just spooked by the wind, essentially.”

He chuckled after a moment, the subtle drumming of his fingers on the table were barely audible. “Good to know. Sleep well, darling.”

When he hung up, you were left with your own thoughts—wondering if that final sound was a hiss.

—------------------------------------------------

“You look trusting.”

That statement had been sitting in your inbox for a couple of hours. You weren’t sure whether it would be better to ignore it or to keep the response short. After all, you had no idea who these people were and were nervous that you would make others feel singled out.

“Oh? Is that a good thing or bad thing? haha!” The tone was intended to be comical. However, the follow-up drained any humor from the situation.

“It depends on the other person. ;)”

Shaking off this comment was proving to be difficult. You only had a few hours before your scheduled stream and needed a way to cool off. On a whim, you reached out to Caesar, thinking that talking to him would take your mind off of things.

“Are you free to meet up? Maybe for a quick coffee or something?”

As you passed by the tall windows, your attention was easily drawn to the tall slender man waiting for you.

The warmth in his smile when he noticed you put your nerves to rest. He got up to greet you, not expecting the hug you gave him. “Well, hello to you too,” his tone was light and airy.

“Sorry, that was a bit forward.” You backed off from the slight awkwardness you’d caused..

He waved off your apology, viewing it as unneeded. “So, tell me. What’s been making you so jittery lately, hm?”

His question tickled the back of your throat, letting the word vomit of your most recent fears spew.

Each situation you described only painted you as paranoid, each fear made you come across as weak, and each inner turmoil you were experiencing gave him reason to abandon you, all of which were suspicions caused by your own insecurities.

He placed his hand on yours, gently rubbing his thumb over the top of your hand. “From an outsider’s perspective, it would seem that your imagination is getting the best of you.” Cocking his head slightly to meet your fallen gaze, when your eyes met his, he gave you a reassuring smile.

You wondered just how pathetic you must sound. “I’m sorry. I probably sound crazy.” Burying your face in your hands, the heat building in your chest rose as you heard him laugh.

“No, not at all.” Even without looking at him, you could feel his eyes on every part of you. “Tell you what. Why don’t I swing by your place tonight? I could keep you company, take your mind off of all those spooky things.”

The two of you hadn’t known each other for that long - only a few weeks, not even a month yet, and he was suggesting that you potentially spend the night together?

You cleared your throat in an attempt to push down your timid nature. “Yeah, we—you could come by.”

Grinning at you with a glimmer of mischief in his eyes, he lightly slapped his hand on the table. “Excellent! We’ll have fun, I promise.” He winked before checking the time. “Oh! Five o’clock already. Where does the time go?”

You poorly concealed your panic. “I have to go. I’m sorry, I’ll call you when I’m ready for you to come over.”

“I look forward to it.”

Your shyness was more attractive than you gave yourself credit for. With you tucking your loose hair behind your ear, your bashful nod paired well with his confidence. He chuckled as you clumsily ran out the door, watching you until you disappeared down the street.

You were running short on time before the stream was supposed to start, so you didn’t have time to glance at the question that popped up in your inbox. There were three more pings before you silenced it.

You maintained your natural presence in front of the camera: smiling, friendly, open.

“How often do you check your phone?” A text to speech came through.

“I mean, I check it whenever I can, but obviously when I’m streaming, I don’t unless it’s an emergency.”

A few minutes passed.

“So are you ignoring my earlier question?” Came through and read as aggressive.

“What do you mean? I haven’t received any other questions here. At least, I don’t think so.”

“Check your phone.” As the chat started going wild, asking what exactly was happening and wanting to know what was on your phone, you felt yourself buckling under pressure.

You turned the lock screen on. There were more than thirty messages sent to your inbox. Scrolling through them, they were all asking the same question: “Do you feel safe where you live?”

“So, are you going to answer my question?”

In spite of the chat demanding your attention, you felt like you had no other choice—you had to end the stream. “Sorry, guys!” Your mask of positivity wasn’t as convincing as you thought it was, “I have to end the stream early! I forgot I had something planned. Um, yeah, sorry.”

You ran to your windows to ensure they were locked and then pulled the blinds over them. Dialing his number, you practically begged Caesar to come over as soon as possible.

You gave him the address and informed him to text you when he was there, so that you could buzz him in because the intercom wasn’t working properly.

Pacing back and forth, you peaked out your windows every now and then to keep tabs on any suspicious people.

When a knock came at the door, you ran to open it. “You got here fast,” you breathed.

“I was already in the area.” You stepped aside to welcome him in.

He took a look around your place, nodding at certain things and raising his eyebrows at others. Turning back to face you, your disheveled appearance left little else to discuss. “You’re looking…worse than earlier. What happened?”

“I’ve been getting just these creepy fucking messages flooding my inbox.” ‘Creepy? How so?” He wandered over to your windows.

“I mean, look for yourself.” You put your phone in his hands and intently watched his expression as he scrolled through them.

“Wow…”

“Yeah, it’s really… God, I feel like I’m being watched.” You rubbed the sides of your arms in a failed attempt at self-soothing.

“Hey, hey,” he came to your side to comfort you. “Don’t freak yourself out. I’m here now so if anyone dares try anything, they’ll have to get through me first.” You melted in his arms as the condolence washed over you.

“Why don’t we make ourselves comfortable on the sofa and watch any movie of your choice.”

“That sounds lovely,” you hummed.

“Yeah?” He cooed at you, stroking your cheek with his thumb. As you nodded and fluttered your eyes at him, he resisted the urge to take you right there and then.

“Can we watch 50 First Dates? It’s my favorite.” You held a sense of embarrassment in your request.

“Of course, darling.”

Making sure you were comfortable with enough blankets, he plopped down next to you, lazily slinging his arm over the top of the sofa. You took that as an invitation to scoot closer to him.

Mouthing each quote you mesmerized from your favorite scenes, you were so lost in the story that you didn’t even notice Caesar’s subtle smile as he admired you.

“You’re a hopeless romantic, aren’t you?” A question hinting at the amount of affection he had for you.

“I just love love.”

His laugh was louder than usual. “That’s a very cute sentiment.”

Although the humor he saw in it stung a bit, you chose not to make a big deal out of it.

“By the way, what’s your answer to that question?”

That came out of the blue and caught you off guard. “What question?”

“The one that was spammed to you.” He side eyed you as you processed the situation. As that moment lingered between the two of you growing strained from the impatience he held, that dreadful hissing noise faded into the room.

The rise and fall of your chest indicated your rising stress. Your eyes darted around his face, realizing that you were sitting next to a stranger. “How did you know which apartment is mine?”

“What kind of question is that? You gave me the address.”

“But I didn’t give you the apartment number.”

A long agitated sigh left him. “So I take it that you don’t feel safe here?”

Your instinct took over when he took his arm off you and leaned down to get the remote. Before your body had barely lifted off the cushion, he had you pinned to him. Your shrill shriek from his tight grip was followed by him shushing you.

“I don’t want to hurt you. Just don’t scream and you’ll be okay.” His arms were wrapped tightly around you. He stroked your hair and rested his cheek on the top of your head, tenderly kissing it periodically.

“You’ve always been my favorite, you know. The others… they just ended up not being who I thought they were.”

“What did you do to them?” Regret replaced curiosity as soon as you asked.

“You won’t have to find out, so long as you’re honest.” He could feel your rapid pulse as his fingers traced your neck. “You’ll be fine, darling.” He placed a firm kiss on your temple. “None of the others made it this far.” He murmured against the side of your face, “You’re so perfect.”

Tears had been building up in the corners of your eyes and were streaming down your cheeks. “What do you want?” Shaky and vulnerable: you were delectable.

“To be with you, you silly thing!” As he pulled you closer against him, you were too afraid to resist. “I’ve been following you for quite a while now, on both of your platforms. That sweet face beaming for the camera and that more tender side you showed on your blog, you had my heart from the get go.”

His hands roamed over your legs, favoring the fat on your inner thighs. When you trembled and your breath hitched, he trailed kisses along the back of your neck. “I know how lonely you are, my dear, because I know that pain all too well. You spend every moment online, barely going outside. It’s not healthy, especially for someone who’s so in love with love.”

He took your silence as a sign to continue pushing you. “Let me love you,” he groaned as his hands traveled further up your thighs, feeling the heat between them. “Don’t disappoint me now, not after making it this far.”

The ominous tone blanketed you. “I won’t.”

Tasting your tears as he pressed his lips against your cheek, his voice was thick with need. “Good girl.” His fingers found their way to your clit with ease, having you squirming in his arms. “Such a good little thing, aren’t you?” He nipped at your earlobe and licked the shell of your ear.

Shockwaves coursed through your core, earning him a few gasps and regrettable moans from you. Your nails dug into his thighs as he grinded against you. Running his fingers over the wet patch shamelessly pooling in your cotton panties, his eyes rolled back at his realization.

“It’s been a while since someone touched you, hasn’t it?”

He smiled against your neck as you squeaked out a yes. Sinking his teeth into your shoulder, he was quick to lather the sore spot with his tongue to soothe the pain.

As he tugged your panties aside and relished in the silky warmth he’d been dreaming of, he nipped at your neck, sucking at the markings that were sure to leave bruises.

While you writhed against him, he matched your motions with his hips. Pressing himself against you, allowing you to feel just how desperate he was for you was causing him to pant from his insatiable lust.

“I need you. I need you right now.” He growled in a nearly threatening manner.

The faintest compliance you showed had him sweeping you up in his arms and carrying you off to your bedroom. He put you down in front of your gaming chair and ordered you climb on.

You began to derobe, but he pushed your hands away. “Just get on the chair.”

Sounds of him fumbling with your equipment got your attention. “W-wait, no, what are you doing?”

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to stream us. Just going to record. Besides, you seem like you really enjoy putting on a show for the camera.” The cocky grin he wore exuded the assurance he held in his depiction of you.

Your skirt wasn’t leaving anything to the imagination in this position. Gripping your hips, he groaned seeing how much your pussy was eating your underwear—completely soaking them.

Blind siding yourself to what was happening behind you, all you heard was the swift stripping of his belt and pants.

Teasing your entrance, the longing for this moment was beading at his tip, “Are you ready for me?”

“Y-yes,” your nerves made your confidence in coming out of this in one piece falter.

He started off slow, savoring how you felt around him. The more he pushed into you, however, the more it felt like he was forcing himself.

“T-too deep. You’re too deep!”

“Shhh, just relax, my pet.” As your walls spasmed around him, he began steadily pumping in and out of you. “That’s right. Just like that.”

Each of your moans fueled the fantasy he had of you, encouraging him to push you past your limits. He tangled his fingers in your hair as he leaned down—his breath hot against your ear. “You’re just how I imagined.”

With that he tugged your hair, forcing you to arch your back. Granting himself more dominance over you, he pushed further by wrapping his other hand around your throat and squeezing lightly.

He angled your face towards the webcam. “Look at how gorgeous you are when I fuck you.” Watching the screen with you, he couldn’t have missed the way your eyes rolled back. Witnessing the sheer euphoria wrecking your body, his own climax was just within reach.

Your strangled cries and gasps, the way your body trembled and quaked, feeling your tears fall onto his hand: he couldn’t hold back much longer.

His voice was husky and thick with his fast approaching peak of ecstasy, “Scream my name. I want to cum to your voice raw from screaming my name.”

You cried out for him, pleading for him to cum. Your screams resembled choked sobs as you felt him tensing up.

With a final thrust, he streamed a rope of hot cum into you, coating your walls entirely with his obsession for you. Letting you out of his grip, you collapsed on the chair. While he leaned back on your desk, he basked in the sight of you dripping with his seed.

He ran his hand over your hip, making you quake and whimper. “Still so sensitive,” he grinned at the display of power he had over you.

“Don’t worry, my pet, I’m far from done showing you how much I love you.”

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mikaleialt · 2 years ago

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Coming Back to You | Minah Lee

Minah Lee x Reader

Cw: angst, smut, fluff. MDNI. MERRY CHRISTMAS @taruusmoon. <3, also I was waiting for Minah to poat the perfect picture for this pic and she finally did, look at how fucking hot she is!!!! And happy birthday to my girl Minah Lee.

"I'm just saying that I wish you could make time for me, even for just 10 minutes!"

Here you are again, you've been arguing with your girlfriend, Minah for the nth time this week. You two were supposed to be on a date today, but she ditched you last second because she "forgot" that her team had a scheduled meeting earlier on the same time of your dinner reservation at this restaurant.

Now you're both here in your apartment, 4 am in the morning, fighting like a wedded couple once again. Minah just got back from their "meeting" which you found out that is actually a party from the fact that your girlfriend reeks of alcohol.

"Babe, you know that we've been busy with the show right? We all need to be better, do you hear what people call us? We weren't even acknowledged by the other contestants, they were just calling us 'Bada and her students'." You scoff at your girlfriend's alibi, seriously you can't even comprehend how she could say that while slurring over her words, completely obvious that she is drunk.

"You don't have time? YOU DON'T TIME?" You couldn't contain your anger anymore, "YOU DON'T HAVE FUCKING TIME, BUT YOU HAVE TIME TO GO DRINKING AND PARTYING WHILE I WAS WAITING AT THE RESTAURANT FOR 2 FUCKING HOURS?!" Tears are streaming down your cheeks, when Minah sees this, something inside her snaps almost like her system sobers up immediately.

"Baby I—" you cut her off "Let’s break up" You said it, you finally said it.

You didn't let Minah say anything else as you already walked out off your apartment, leaving her behind.

That was 4 months ago, you moved back to your parents in Busan after your break up, you didn't even bother going back to your apartment for your things, knowing that you're just going to see Minah once again.

But fate has a different plan for you. You've blocked Minah on every single social media you have, and even her phone number, but you're still somehow in touch with her leader, Bada as she is also your dance mentor. So when you received a text from her, inviting you to attend the On the Stage: Busan concert of SWF 2, your mind is split in two.

You balanced out the pros and cons of your options: You want to go to show your support to your dance teacher, but you'll see your ex again; but you can go there and show that you hold no ill will towards her, but you are also not ready to talk to her again.

You sighed in frustration as you picked up your phone and typed in your response, you just hope that you won't regret this later on.

Now here you are, sitting amongst the crowd as the teams of Street Women Fighter 2 performs on stage. You are thankful because you get to watch the performance live and you didn't get to see Minah for the most part, trying to focus on other dancers like the international crew, Jam Republic and Tsubakill, and a some dancers you're close with like Harimu from 1Million and JJ from Deep 'N Dap.

You were screaming, cheering on everyone's performance, but that is until one of the audiences' most awaited performance: Bebe's Global Artist Performance.

Cockiness (I like it) by Rihanna started playing as the stage lights illuminated the 7 girls on the center of the stage, they were all wearing a burlesque inspired outfit which really suited each one of them. You looked at the big screen and the camera immediately focuses on the person you've been wanting to avoid the most

Minah did her iconic intro once the music start and everyone around screams. You wanted to divert your focus on the other members but after seeing your hot ex girlfriend dance in that outfit, you felt your heart flutter for the first time again, almost forgetting the fact that you guys broke up a few months ago.

Not too long, the concert then concluded, all the SWF 2 teams says their goodbye to the audience and finally made their way to each to their changing rooms.

As you are on your way out of the arena, your phone buzzes from your pocket, indicating you received a text message. You fished out your phone and seeing the notification was from Bada

"There's an after party tonight, wanna come?"

You are in the same situation again as when you are invited by Bada to attend the concert. You balanced out your options once again. With the concert only you can see Minah, but you can't interact with each other which you are grateful for, but going to the after party would mean that you will be seeing and interacting with your ex-girlfriend, and that is too much for you.

You were about to type in your answer, when a familiar voice calls out to your name.

"Y/N~!" You looked at the direction where you heard the voice and saw the tall woman running towards you.

"Unnie I—" before you could even say anything she immediately pulled you to the van where the rest of team Bebe is already at, making you seat next to Lusher who is sitting next to Minah. Guess you don't really have a choice.

Just great. You thought to yourself, the rest of the Bebe girls are all talking to each other with you occasionally joining in but you couldn't really say anything else, not when you literally feel the presence of Minah near you. You are thankful enough that Lusher is seated between the two of you.

Or so you thought...

"Y/n-ie can we switch seats, I don't like seating in the middle" You looked at the poor Lusher, she's getting pale due to the uncomfortable situation. Reluctantly you let her switch seats with you, but as soon as you sat down once again, your body tenses up as soon as you brushed your arm against Minah.

She looks at you and offered a bittersweet smile before looking outside the window, minding her own business. The light from the streetlights outside cascades on Minah features, you can't help but stare at her, her now black hair that used to be dyed orange suits her better, and you can see that she wears a subtle dark eye makeup, similar to the make up she wore on their performance.

You were in a trance as you stare at her until you heard snickering behind you, Kyma, Che-Che and Sowoen were right behind you, laughing at how awestruck you are at Minah. Minah heard this also and looks at you before looking at the girls at the back.

The giggling stops as you all arrived at the party venue, the rest of the teams are inside already. Once you got in, you noticed that the members from the other teams also have their own plus one, some are their close friends, while some seems like their partners as you noticed Babysleek’s husband is also here.

The party went on, people drinks and get drunk, some dances and grinds to each other on the dance floor, and soon you too finally let loose and starts partying.

It was way past midnight now and the party is still at its peak, ‘though some are already passed out aka mostly the youngest of each team except for Haechi and Rena who are still partying like wild animals on the dance floor. You however starts to gets dizzy as the song Meddle About by Chase Atlantic blasted on the speakers, the alcohol finally getting through your systems as you now feel quite high from drunkenness. Nevertheless, you still kept dancing on the dance, grinding on the person you now failed to recognize due to the alcohol.

Unbeknownst to you the girl you are shaking your ass on is none other than Minah, her hands are on your waist as she guides your hips to match her rhythm. “Fucking hell, Y/n you’re driving me crazy” she whispers against your ear. Only then do you recognize the voice but instead of flinching away, which what you would probably do if only you were sober, you lean in more to her touch.

Your back against her chest, as you sway your hips against hers, her hands loosely wrapped around your waist while your left hand sat above it, meanwhile your other hand is reaching for her face, trying to keep her head close to yours as she whispers sweet nothings to you.

“You are so fucking beautiful…” She takes in your scent as she presses her lips on your neck before dragging her tongue against your skin. An inappropriate sound escapes from your lips and you can feel your ex-girlfriend smirks against your neck as soon as she heard it.

Her hands traveled down to your pants and started touching hour aching pussy through it. You leaned your head back more, you almost forgot that you two are still in the middle of the dance floor, thankfully everyone is drunk enough to simply ignore what you two are doing.

~~~

“Fuck…taste so good”

Here you are now, your pants now draped below your knees as you sat on the bathroom’s sink, becoming a moaning mess as your ex-girlfriend dives in between your soaking wet cunt. Tongue deep inside you accompanied by two of her fingers, simultaneously thrusting in and out of you.

“M-Minah f—uck” You couldn’t contain your moans, the effects of the alcohol finally subsided, you are now more sober than you were earlier, but now you are high on pleasure as you are about to reach your orgasm.

“Taste so fucking good. I miss this pussy of yours” Minah muttered against your folds “did you missed getting eaten out like this baby?” she dives right back in and you replied with only a pornographic moan, which only encourage Minah more.

“Such a slut for me. Tell me did you regret breaking up with me?” Minah said as she thrust her fingers inside you in a fast pace. You are already fucked out of your mind, couldn’t even construct a proper sentence as you nod your head vigorously.

“Use your words, Y/n” she looks directly at you eyes, and you did the same. You saw that behind the lust in her eyes lays a sense of hopefulness, hoping that you are telling the truth.

“Yes—YES FUCK! I miss you so much, I’m sorry I left you—ack” You are cumming, you really are close. Minah thrusted her fingers faster, while she busied her mouth once again on sucking your clit. Soon a wave of pleasure gushes on your nerves. Your breathe staggers as your legs shakes from the orgasm, your juices sprayed on Minah’s face, god she even managed to make you squirt. Minah stood up from her position and went up to kiss you which you willingly accepts.

“Please give me another chance, Y/n… I promise I’ll be better, I’ll never leave you alone again.” You saw the sincerity on her eyes and you answered her by pulling her again for a kiss.

Outside the bathroom is a poor Tatter who has been wanting to go to the bathroom for quite some time now, only to be welcomed by the moans of her best friends.

A/n: there you go @taruusmoon, I figured to just post it on Minah’s birthday instead but this also serves as your late Christmas present hope you liked it <3

#minah lee x reader #minah lee fic #minah x reader #minah lee #bada lee fanfic #bebe #bebe x reader #swf2 x reader #swf 2 x reader #swf x reader #nique's ask #bada lee x reader #bada x reader #bada lee x y/n #lee bada x reader

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psychopomp-namine · 7 months ago

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it's interesting that yingdu E1 is gonna be the episode that really tells you if you like S1 story structure more, or S2 story structure more.

I thought yingdu would be more like S2 but I'm actually pleasantly surprised it starts more like S1? and I already knew this about myself but I really loved the episodic, slice of life nature of the first half of S1 (and the chibi shorts). I loved S2 and all, but the first time I fell in love with link click it was because of the day-to-day kind of issues they face before they started playing mind games with other people who have abilities like them. and I think I wouldn't have enjoyed S2 or even the back half of S1 if the show didn't start with episodic, low stakes cases. of course, I think they'll probably mix both storytelling styles this special season.

but idk, I really missed that vibe. shiguangling being domestic is sweet. I did like the cosplay story more than vivian's story, though I think them trying to set up the scammer parallel to lu guang was funny. I think cheng xiaoshi shines a lot in these kinds of moments because he's very empathetic even with the little things. lu guang is the one dealing with a lot of big picture stuff (time and death itself) but cheng xiaoshi? he just wants to set up a photography studio and maybe help a couple of people out when he can. play basketball. find a cosplayer to return her paintings. help their student council president to not get scammed.

he's just a little guy! look at him! he thrives in low stakes situations!! give him milk tea and he's happy 🤗

I think the most surprising details in this episode were:

lu guang is in the anime club :o

lu guang kept a detailed notebook of the past?? damn. I feel like he spent one timeline just memorizing and noting down events, down to the last minute.

"your eyes remind me of two people I knew" holy shit. time traveler parents possibly true. what if cheng xiaoshi's parents are lost to the time stream? like, they faced the consequences lu guang said you'd face if you stayed more than 12 hours into a picture (notably though, lu guang doesn't seem? to have this issue when he dives? or I guess past 12 hours you get "stuck" in the past and aren't able to come back to your "present")

what is up with cheng xiaoshi always wanting lu guang to be his partner "for life" asdfghjkl. my guy. you're so sweet

lu guang moves into the photo studio during their university years and bridon happens right after. and he's wearing cheng xiaoshi's summer clothes...

cheng xiaoshi did not clap when he activated his powers with the bridon picture (his hands were holding the envelope and the picture). which is... weird? how did that happen? also he went there as himself which means this picture was... not taken by a photographer? because otherwise he should've possessed someone like normal

finally: lu guang didn't have a watch in the beginning. idk why I always thought he had a watch. anyway, I think we can use the placement of his watch as a signifier of which timeline we're in

no watch: original timeline. when lu guang dives back here, I guess he buys a watch afterwards

watch on the left hand: either the og timeline (after he buys a watch) or the first time he dives? the timeline with cheng xiaoshi's first death? the style of the bedroom makes me think this happened in the first time they go to bridon (which isn't necessarily the same timeline we're seeing in the donghua right now).

edit: actually, scratch that. now I think this might have been lu guang's bedroom lol. the date is 4/12 which is the day cheng xiaoshi reads the 👌 text from lu guang about playing basketball again

it's also consistent with the flashback to cheng xiaoshi's death in S2E1 — watch is on the left hand.

watch on the right hand: S2 finale dive / yingdu E1 dive. which means vein showing up in the photo studio happened sometime during our "current" timeline.

lu guang keeps his watch on his right hand during S1 and S2 as well (catguang in the chibi shorts also has a watch on his right... paw).

there's probably other details I missed but anyway. welcome back link click!! I'm already one square away from getting a bingo in my yingdu bingo card lmao

#mine musings #liveblogging link click #link click spoilers #also. ani mi subtitles seem much better than the one from bilibili #idk if crunchy does simulcast for this #link click

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lottiebagley · 2 years ago

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'Tis the damn season- Sirius Black

If I wanted to know Who you were hanging with While I was gone, I would've asked you It's the kind of cold Fogs up windshield glass But I felt it when I passed you

She felt weird being there, an intense feeling of guilt. She hadn't meant to leave. Really, it was the last thing on her mind at first. But everything felt claustrophobic, like the walls were closing in on her. Things with Sirius were in a weird place and really she wasn't 100% sure how to handle it. Then, all of a sudden, she had this job offer. It was temporary, 6 months in New York and she needed something that felt new and alive and she wanted to be far away from Sirius. Now everything had changed because 5 years later and she still lived an ocean away.

Remus was a teacher now. Lily and James were married with a kid and trying for another. Marlene was thinking about filing for divorce.

They weren't kids anymore. They were in their mid 20's.

She was home for Christmas. She didn't have family in New York nor England, but as they had every year prior Lily and James demanded she spend the holiday at their place.

"God I'm so glad you're here!" Lily is squealing, arms flung around her friend in the busy airport. Little Harry, who's 4 now is clinging to his godmothers leg with gleeful giggles

"Hey Lils," She smiles, a soft smile, as she returns the hug. Leaning down to pick Harry up "How's my little trouble maker?" She questions, propping the dark haired boy on her hip as she grabs her suitcase, listening to the child's babble and responding when needed as her and Lily make their way to the Potter's car.

Harry is babbling excitedly from the backseat, about father christmas and presents and chocolate, as Lily attempts to join the stream of traffic leaving the car park

"James is so sorry he couldn't come with us to pick you up, he got called into work last minute," Lily apologises as they start the hour long drive back to her home.

"Prongs knows I don't mind Lils, and so do you. Just grateful to have somewhere to spend Christmas,"

"And you should know we would never let you spend it alone," Lily reminds, her friend smiling softly.

"I do know that," She reassures. It was true. She'd grown up next door the Potter family, so inevitably James was one of her best friends. When they both made Gryffindor they stuck together, as everyone who knew them expected. They had their little group which eventually adopted her dorm mates, Lily, Dorcas and Marlene after Lily and Severus stopped speaking.

It had been content, the war was fought and they survived.

The friendships survived too for the most part the only lingering awkwardness being the one shared by her and Sirius. They never dated, technically, but they were in love. Utterly deeply in love. They had been since they were 15 and though they never actually confessed it, never allowed their friendship to blossom into something more, they both knew it. Sirius was her first kiss, her first time. He took her to dances and picked her up from class and she painted his quidditch number on her cheek for each game and stroked his hair. It wasn't a relationship, but in all ways but labels it was, which led to inevitable drama. It was unsustainable but nothing changed, they both knew it was why she left.

"You can ask y'know," Lily comments, eyes ever so briefly flickering to glance at her friend knowing the thoughts in her mind.

"Don't think I wanna know the answer," She shrugs, glancing out of the window. "Is he gonna- y'know," She trails off embarrassed to admit seeing him again had been on the forefront of her mind.

"Yeah he's spending the holidays too," Lily confirms, watching as her friend nods and knowing better than to ask her what she's thinking.

"Is he..." She trails off not entirely awkwardly, Lily glances at her intense eyes and a knowing smirk "Does he. I- A date? Is he bringing someone of the holidays?" She lets the question spill out

"No," Lily informs simply, she doesn't offer anything else, changing the conversation quickly.

There's an ache in you Put there by the ache in me But if it's all the same to you It's the same to me

She'd known she was going to see him, with Lily's confirmation in her mind. She didn't know though, how she felt about it. Excited and nervous all at once, would he hate her? would he have moved on? Just because he wasn't bringing someone for the holidays didn't mean he didn't have someone.

She hadn't expected though, to see him quite so quickly. The car pulls into the drive and she knows immediately that he's there, motorbike tucked at the end of the drive way and the door is being pulled open by him. His hair is a little longer, though she hadn't seen him since last Christmas so she could have predicted that. He's clad in a warm looking jumper and some sweatpants, clearly cozy inside the comforting home.

"There's my little man!" He's cheering, wide grin, as he rushes to open a giggling Harry's car door, quickly fetching the child from his car seat and lifting him into a tight hug.

She wonders, briefly, if he was concentrating on not letting his eyes fall to her, or if maybe that magnetising need to look at each other wasn't there anymore. For him at least. She still can't imagine a view on earth she'd rather look at than that of Sirius Black.

"Thought you were coming tonight?" Lily questions, she's helping the girl with her bags but her eyes are watching Sirius, watching as he seems adamant on not looking at the girl who's staring at him so desperately Lily thinks she looks as if she could combust.

"Regulus' new girlfriend is a bore," Sirius shrugs, he knows he should greet her, that it's awkward not too, after all they are spending the next week in the same house. But he doesn't want to be the first to say something. He didn't leave. He didn't not return any calls.

"Hi Sirius," Her voice is timid and as much as he's glad to hear it, to see she's here, she's here and well and not got some boyfriend to spend her holidays with he hates it. Hates that she is reserved around him now.

"Hey, good flight?"

"Fine, crying baby but no turbulence,"

"That's good then, aside from the crying obviously," he feels like an idiot the second the words have left his mouth

"Yeah,"

"Cool," he wants to curse whoever has decided now would be a good time to remove every word he has ever known from his mind and leave him a boring, lifeless shell.

"What about you? How was Regulus?"

"Fine got a new girlfriend,"

"Heard she's a bore," The girl jokes and Sirius smiles, a real smile. Wondering, for a moment, when he last didn't have to force a smile.

It's then that Harry begins to whine, Lily swooping in to get him inside and get him a snack. The small moment effectively ruined.

So we could call it even You could call me "babe" for the weekend 'Tis the damn season, write this down I'm staying at my parents' house And the road not taken looks real good now And it always leads to you and my hometown

The house is cold, it hadn't been the whole evening, upstairs and tucked in the spare bed she hadn't been. James had insisted she take the guest room. He'd assured time and time again that Remus and Sirius didn't mind her having it. Remus was going to have a blow up bed in the office and Sirius was taking the couch. She had consistently tried to take either sleeping situation, feeling bad to be the one taking the bed. The offer was refused.

She's humming softly, some Christmas song that had been stuck in her head for days having heard it so many times recently. Her hands make light work of pouring milk into a pan, the lights in the kitchen set to dim.

"Let me guess, hot chocolate?" His voice is velvety, not at all laced with sleep. She wonders if he was laid awake too, thinking about how she was directly above him, so close yet impossibly far.

He had been.

"You know me too well," She agrees, voice soft. She doesn't turn around, feels almost embarrassed to be clad in reindeer print pj bottoms and some old jumper she'd had forever.

"You just haven't changed since we were eleven," He returns, leaning on the door frame.

"You want one?" She asks, moving towards the fridge to take out the milk once more.

"I got it," He announces. She nods, lets him cross the room to take out the milk, instead taking out another mug, and dumping 2 tablespoons of hot chocolate powder into it.

He arrives by her side, placing the milk down alongside a can of whipped cream.

"Pretty sure that's for Harry's special christmas eve hot chocolate, the one with a flake and marshmallows and smarties," She comments, her tone is soft, the adoration she has for the child evident.

"What he doesn't know won't hurt him," Sirius shrugs, he watches as she carefully adds more milk to the stove, "Just promise you won't tell on me yeah?"

"Your secret's safe with me," She confirms, she looks at him then. For the first time since he entered the room. He's already looking at her. With a look she can't read and so much intensity she wonders if anyone has ever looked at her like that before. He looks beautiful though, glowing in the soft lighting of the room.

"Y'know, I still do this every time I can't sleep," She informs him, eyes sincere and voice quiet, almost lost in the night.

He knows what she's trying to say. It had started when they were kids, he'd found her in the common room late at night on the second day of school. They'd spoken a little, but she'd stuck to James like glue, quiet when he wasn't by her side. She'd looked at him, wide glassy eyes. He'd asked what was wrong and she'd whispered to him about feeling like she was never going to belong in Gryffindor, not even at Hogwarts. He'd comforted her, wiped her tears away and helped her sneak to the kitchens, acting confident when in reality he'd never done it before either. He'd made the hot chocolate and she'd sat on a counter, he made her laugh and she suddenly felt like maybe everything would work out, like she might belong here after all.

It had become ritualistic for them. If one of them was sad they'd sneak to the kitchens and make hot chocolates and vent and cheer each other up.

Her first break up.

His bad fight with James.

Her dad passing.

His parents.

The war.

"I do too," He'd said quietly. Looking away now, almost like her words had hurt him even though it was the last thing she intended to do. "Milk's done," He adds, he wanted to leave the room, he was scared. Scared if he stood there, looking at her all domestic and cosy and glowing and beautiful, he wouldn't be able to resist the urge he'd been fighting since she climbed out of the car that morning.

I parked my car Right between the Methodist and the school that used to be ours The holidays linger like bad perfume You can run but only so far I escaped it too Remember how you watched me leave But if it's okay with you It's okay with me

Her legs are curled under lap, almost cat like in the large arm chair. Remus in next to her, sprawled across the sofa with the crossword of the day from some muggle paper in his hands.

She has one too, in her lap, though she's hardly looking.

"Ok, I'm at a wall. Trade me," Remus announces, leaning across to hand her the paper he had been working on

"Huh?"

"Trade me?" He questions, eyebrows furrowing at her despondent face.

"Right," She nods, switching papers with him.

He looks at her crossword, hardly started and suddenly he feels bad.

"You okay?" He asks, he glances out of the window she's clearly looking out of. Sirius is out there, leather jacket and a loose scarf. He's laughing, head thrown back and eyes crinkled. Helping Harry, who Lily had bundled up extra tight, to build a snowman.

"Fine," She confirms, pulling her eyes away from Sirius to look at her friend.

"I can only imagine how hard this is for you," Remus says gently

"I'm okay," She shrugs. Remus nods, not sure what to say. It felt like a theme recently. In the 24 hours she'd been there Lily, James and Remus had all struggled. Not sure what to say to either of their friends. They clearly missed each other, clearly pined for each other. Yet, neither of them was doing anything about it, neither of them even wanted to talk about it.

"You know he never wanted kids," She speaks quietly, head motioning outside. "It was weird. I always thought he'd be a great dad. Still, think he would. I just- I guess I got it. His parents were-well, y'know- and I understood him not wanting to repeat that, thinking he'd be like him, his dad I mean. He wouldn't though. He'd have been a good dad. Still could be I guess,"

"I think so too," Remus confirms, eyes traveling to watch his friend as he helps Harry to roll a head for his snowman.

"I get that he was scared, just think it's a shame," She comments. She turns back to her crossword, to Remus' familiar scrawl. She'd said too much, she didn't want to put anyone in the middle of things.

"You're wrong," Remus speaks, still watching Sirius

"How so?"

"He wanted kids. He talked about it a bit," Remus explains, watching as she turns to look at him face contort with confusion, "Said he wanted them after the war. A boy first, then a girl,"

"He'd be a good girl dad,"

"Didn't seem to care too much," Remus shrugs, "He just wanted a family. Everyone to be happy and healthy and safe. Said he wanted a daughter cause he thought she'd look like you,"

"Me?"

"Who else would he have had this fictitious family with?" Remus shrugs

"Sirius didn't want to settle down, we all knew that,"

"If you'd asked he would have done,"

"Remus-" She sighs

"You know I'm right. He'd have done anything you asked,"

"That's not fair, I wasn't even his girlfriend,"

"Sorry. I'm not trying to put anything on you. I'm just saying, he would have done anything you asked. Think he probably still would,"

"I asked him to be my boyfriend. He said no," She states simply. She'd asked too early, that's what Sirius had always said. To ask right before a war was starting, when their lives were so imminently in danger. The label would make something happening to either of them so much worse, it's what he'd said when he rejected her.

Remus wants to say that if she'd asked again, asked after the war, that Sirius would have said yes. That he'd have married her on the spot if it's what she'd wanted. That Sirius had told him that the day before she left. But Remus decides it's not fair to put that on her. She left and Sirius stayed and either one of them could have changed everything.

"Let's talk about something else," Remus decides.

We could call it even You could call me "babe" for the weekend 'Tis the damn season, write this down I'm staying at my parents' house And the road not taken looks real good now

Lily was stressed, that much was clear. Her hair was messy and Harry was whining on her hip. The kitchen a mess around her. James wasn't much better. Somewhere outside with Remus and Sirius, a desperate attempt to try and construct the goddamn gazebo.

"Lil, everything okay?" Her friends voice speaks from the doorway

"Oh hey, I didn't hear you get back," Lily speaks, her voice a little quick and eyes wide as she turns around, Harry starts to let out a whine and Lily's eyes screw shut.

Her friend is quick, reaching out to the toddler and distracting him quickly when she passes him his dinosaur toy from the kitchen counter. "What can I do?"

"Remind me to never listen to James and agree to host a stupid Christmas Eve party next year?" Lily questions, she's moving quickly back to the counter. Stirring the chocolate that's melting in a pan for dessert, momentarily abandoning the vegetables she had been cutting.

"Okay, and for right now?"

"I hate food cooked with magic, but this is hard and I have a thousand things to do and no time and-" Lily complains, eyes starting to turn glassy

"Lily, sweetheart, you are gonna be fine. Delegate okay? I chop a mean carrot,"

"No, you're a guest and-"

"Lil, what do you need?"

"Can you run to the supermarket?"

"Done," The girl nods, scribbling the list Lily recites onto an old envelope

"Take one of the boys with you, there's going to be a million bags," Lily instructs, pointing out her car keys as she turns back to her food prep "You're the best," She calls after her friend.

The silence in the car is awkward, they both hate it, because before all of this silence between them was never anything but comfortable. She has so much she wants to say and he does too, yet neither of them can even begin to find the words they would need.

"Got a lot to get?" Sirius questions from the passenger seat, fingers tapping anxiously at his thigh.

"There's a list in my bag," The girl answers, suddenly questioning if she'd come off blunt, she hadn't intended to.

"Can I?" He questions, head tilting to the tote bag on the back seat, unaware whether they were at an appropriate level to go rifling through each others bags.

"Sure," She agrees, he leans back, grabbing the bag and pulling it onto his lap.

He rifles through the bag for the list, trying to ignore the de ja vu the bag causes, her essentials the same as they were in her high school bag.

"You're a shit driver y'know?" he teases, looking up from the list when she takes a turn much too quickly, jolting him in his seat

"Maybe I had a really bad teacher," She shrugs in response, they both find their minds running to the summer Sirius had taught her to drive, her home opposite the Potter's allowing them to hang out every vacation.

"At some point you can't teach someone, trust me I tried,"

"You gave up,"

"Well at the time I was a glorified taxi service,"

"I'd say private chauffeur," She corrects, he smiles lightly

"I'm driving home,"

"Okay,"

Time flies Messy as the mud on your truck tires Now I'm missing your smile, hear me out We could just ride around And the road not taken looks real good now And it always leads to you and my hometown

The black dress sparkles a little in the light of the guest room, ending at her thighs and tight to her body she turns a little in the mirror, she was running a little late but it had taken forever to get her hair to fall right.

She thought maybe she'd dragged out getting ready a little too long. The party had started downstairs, there was so many people. People from school. People she didn't know, new friends and colleagues. Her friends, all of them. Yet it was daunting. She thinks maybe it was the thought of Sirius, Sirius all dressed up because she just knew he'd look perfect. Sirius flirting with some girl he'd invited, or one of James' colleagues or someone from school.

She'd been drinking wine as she got ready, something she'd done to ease her nerves but now she almost regretted. Feeling a little tipsy and overly emotional, the idea of watching Sirius with someone else left her feeling a white hot anger in her very soul. A feeling she knew was incredibly unjustified, yet she couldn't push it away.

It's why, as she walked into the decorated living room, bee lining to Marlene, who was squealing at the sight of her well missed friend, she was glad to see Sirius was in the corner of the room playing with Harry.

She spends hours catching up with friends, making polite chit chat with people from distant memories, smiling and exchanging pleasantries with strangers. She allows some guy from Lily's work to flirt with her but doesn't give anything back.

She watches Sirius from afar. He looks beautiful, so utterly beautiful. He's dressed in a white shirt that's tight around his form, the top few buttons undone and his blazer abandoned somewhere.

He spends as much of his night as he possibly can with Harry, staying with the kid until he's tucking the sleeping boy into his bed. Partly because he firmly believes Lily and James deserve a night off, partly because it's the perfect alibi.

After that Sirius tries to float, doing little jobs to help things run smoothly and using a plethora of excuses to excuse himself from conversations. He feels rude, particularly to a girl from school who he is sure is nervous to approach him. He isn't rude. But he thinks maybe it comes off that way.

He's not sure is it's just that it hurts to see her so okay, head back laughing with her friends. Or maybe it's just how drained he's felt all day.

He grabs a bottle of champagne and his blazer, sneaking outside and to sitting on the floor round the side of the house. Out of sight from any windows. He digs through his blazer pocket for a packet of cigarettes and a lighter, a habit he's been trying to drop but honestly was struggling with.

Its 5 minutes of silence before he is the slight click of heels on the floor. He holds his breath, hoping to not be found. She rounds the corner and he exhales. Feeling less drained just at the sight of her.

"Got a light?" She questions, Sirius nods and watches as she crosses towards him, cigarette in one hand and glass of champagne in the other. She holds the cigarette out to him and he lights it for her. "Mind if I sit? Or I can go smoke in the back garden and we can both pretend the other person isn't out here?"

"Sit," He says simply, she nods, sitting next to him on the cold ground, Remus had shovelled snow all afternoon. "Since when did you smoke?"

"Since 2 years ago, I had some project due at work and I was crazy stressed. Some guy I work with offered me one and I accepted. Stupid looking back," She informs simply.

"It's bad for you,"

"I've been telling you that since we were 17," She reminds

"Been trying to quit," He admits, watching her as she stares at him. Her eyes are slightly hazy, he can see she's drank a little too much but she's holding herself together gracefully.

"That's good. I have too,"

"Good," He nods, he watches as she inhales and exhales and sips her champagne.

"Why are you out here?"

"It was too much in there," Sirius admits, she nods in quiet understanding

"I get that,"

"You always did. Get me," He sighs, almost wishfully

"I guess so,"

"Do you regret leaving?" He asks. He thinks maybe he shouldn't. That come morning maybe he'll regret it. But there's something about the way she looks in the moonlight. The way she's been looking at him since she came outside, and how it's the same way she's always looked at him.

"I'm really proud of my career. I wouldn't have it if I had stayed," She's careful in her words, he can see her thinking about them before she speaks

"Right." He nods, her words in his mind are a polite rejection.

Sleep in half the day Just for old times' sake I won't ask you to wait If you don't ask me to stay

"Merry Christmas!" James' voice is loud as he enters the guest bedroom, flipping the light on without a care in the world

"I hate you," She states simply, they grew up together and James really was the closest thing she had to a brother. He smirks watching as she uses the thick sage green bedding to cover her eyes from the light.

"I know. Haz wants you to come downstairs so we can do gifts,"

"What time is it?"

"6. He's been up since 4," James informs, she pulls the duvet down from her face to see him leaning in the door way

"Fine," She agrees stretching a little before clambering from the bed. The matching Christmas pjs Lily had purchased for everyone bunched up a little.

"Hey, you doing okay? With Sirius I mean," James' voice drops low as he asks, eyes scanning the landing behind him briefly

"I'm fine," She can tell from the look on his face he doesn't believe her "Promise,"

"Mooney said he saw you guys sneaking back into the house last night. At the party," she hates the way his voice sounds hopeful

"We were both having a smoke James. It's nothing,"

"Thought you were quitting,"

"You sound like your mother,"

"Harsh! Go downstairs already woman," James teases, his tone light as he shoves her playfully on her way past him.

Lily makes mimosas and the group of friends share easy laughs as the day passes by, gifts exchanged and Harry smothered with love and attention. She decides it's the easiest day, people are distracted enough in the festivities the Potters have planned to not spend the whole day worrying about her and Sirius.

Without eyes on them they both find it easier to talk, they share whispered jokes and his dizzying beauty seems softer when he's smiling at her as they peel veg together.

"Lil I'm serious, go play with James and Harry. We can handle veg duty," She's determined in the way she gently pushes the girl through the archway into the kitchen.

"Thankyou sweetie," Lily is beaming, looking between her friend and Sirius's back knowingly before shooting her friend a knowing wink. "Rem, come with!" She calls as she retreats to the living room. Remus does as told, but not before giving Sirius a pointed look, one that screams 'SAY SOMETHING'.

"I've got the potatoes if you've got the carrots," Sirius offers

"Sounds good," She confirms, fluffy socks pattering on the floor as she takes her place beside him at the oak counter.

"When are you flying back to New York?"

"The 28th, I promised Mitch I'd be back in time for his birthday stroke crazy new years party,"

"That's fun," Sirius is lying. Nothing about what she just said is fun. It's the opposite. He has three more days before she's an ocean away all over again. She's rushing home, not staying for new years like she has every other year for some guy.

That's the least fun of all, Mitch. Who the fuck is Mitch? Sirius is racking his memories, in all the awkward Christmases they'd shared since she left she's never once mentioned a Mitch.

She sees the question in his eyes but doesn't say anything else. She's about to, truly she is, until the song playing through the small radio changes.

"Oh my god it's my favourite Christmas song!" She's beaming, dropping the carrot and knife she's holding and rushing to turn the music up.

He smiles gently, watching as she begins to dance around the kitchen. Red tartan pyjamas and the knit jumper Remus gifted her, he can't stop his mind from running to all the summer holidays they'd make breakfast together in the Potter's kitchen and she'd dance around.

"God, you still can't dance," He teases, gentle smile

"Shut up and dance with me!" She demands, she stretching an arm out to him and fuck he wishes he knew how to say no to her.

They jump around and sing along, hands linked together as he twirls her around the room, hearts beaming and flooding the room with laughter.

The song ends and she's breathless, chest to chest, so close to each other.

"Mitch?" He can't help the question, not when he's so close to her, not when it's taking everything in him not to lean down and kiss her

"He's gay."

"Oh,"

"There's no one else for me," She says it quietly, hands dropping his and looking down to her feet, almost embarrassed to admit it

His hand shoots up, cupping her cheek gently and forcing her to look at him

"Me either," He reassures, voice smooth and soft.

So I'll go back to LA And the so-called friends who'll write books about me if I ever make it And wonder about the only soul who can tell which smiles I'm faking And the heart I know I'm breaking is my own To leave the warmest bed I've ever known

James Potter can make a kick-ass espresso martini. It wasn't new information, he always made cocktails in the evening on Christmas. The rest of the inner friend group (the other girls from the dorm at school) and their spouses would come over, they would play stupid games and listen to the music they grew up on and the parents would take it in turns to check on Neville and Harry who by this point would be sound asleep in Harry's space themed bedroom.

Lily had gawped with wide eyes when she'd chosen the seat next to Sirius at Christmas dinner. Remus almost choked on his carrot when Sirius had ever so casually wrapped his arm around her at the table and she had leaned into his touch Marlene had been shooting her friend knowing looks all night, eyebrows raised in question at the way she'd been perched on the arm of his arm chair the whole night.

Nothing had happened. Not really. But something in the air had changed, something in the way he was looking at her was different, the longing glances had lost their sadness.

The night ends slowly, Marlene and Dorcas wander out into the night. Alice heads to where James had pulled out the sofa bed in the office. Lily leaves having checked on the kids one last time.

She's the next to head to bed, acutely aware of the sound of Sirius behind her on the stairs even though he's been sleeping downstairs the whole trip.

"What are you doing up here?" She whispers the question in the hallway as Sirius arrives on the landing.

"I wanted to say night," He whispers back, he looks too pretty. The warm lighting from the downstairs light makes him almost glow and he has a drunken grin on his face. She's no better, her eyes glassy from one too many of those damned martinis.

"You said night downstairs," She counters, he rolls his eyes fond gentle smile as he tucks her hair behind her ear.

"I'm glad you're here,"

"Me too," She confirms it quietly "Look forward to getting to see you, talk to you all year." He doesn't know if the light blush on her cheeks is from the alcohol or the whispered confession.

"Doesn't have to just be at Christmas y'know? You could call, visit even. I really miss you," He isn't shy in his confession. He'd scream it from the rooftops if it meant she might be a part of his life again for more than just the holidays.

"Sirius," Her voice is soft, he's too close. He is so close and she feels overwhelmed by him, drunk on his scent and using all her self control to keep her hands out of his hair.

"I mean it, darling. Truly," His hand reaches out, firm against her chin. "Hey, look," He speaks, face close enough she feels his breath on her face. She follows his eyes, looking up to see a sprig of mistletoe above them.

James does it every year, enchants mistletoe to sprout above two people in love. Mainly, he does it so he can kiss Lily and remind her to stop being so stressed about hosting and actually enjoy the holidays. Partly, he did it in the hopes it might help his two friends find their way back to each other.

"Can I?" Sirius's question is full of nerves, scared he's pushing her too far

"Always,"

It's gentle and timid, the way he pushes his lips to hers. It's safe at first, a peck. Neither wants the other to freak and run.

He's the one to push it further, though that isn't really surprise.

He pulls her ever closer, chest to chest and his big arms wrap around her, holding her to him. He kisses her like he's desperate, scared if he stops he'll loose her all over again.

She feels like she can breathe properly for the first time in years. Feels a weight off her shoulders as she allows her hands to tangle into his hair, a craving she'd had every time she looked at him. She lets him man handle her towards the door to the guest room.

His tongue pushing into her mouth as he holds her against the wall by the door. One of her hands stays tangled in his hair as the other moves down to hold onto the warm skin of his hip, fingertips slipping under his maroon sweater.

His hand travels down, landing on her bum with a firm squeeze and the motion seems to bring her back to her senses a little. She pulls away, though Sirius is quick to chase her kiss swollen lips with his own. She giggles in response, one last chaste peck to his lips before she looks him in the eyes, blown out a little with lust and creased from his bright grin.

"Sirius," She sighs out, he smirks head falling to allow himself to press a trails of kisses down her jaw and onto her neck

"Darling," he murmurs against her skin

"This is a really bad idea," Her point seems a little futile as she moves her head to the side to allow him more space to press his kisses

"Tell me you want me to stop. Say the word and I'll go back downstairs and you can go to sleep and we can wake up and pretend none of this happened,"

We could call it even Even though I'm leaving And I'll be yours for the weekend 'Tis the damn season

He doesn't think he's ever seen a sight so beautiful. She's laid next to him, body lit by the pale moonlight casting through the window. Her skin is bare and flushed and she fits against his body as perfectly as she always has.

Her leg is strewn over his naked torso, her head resting on his chest, hand reaching up to comb her fingers through his hair.

His arm that wraps around her lands on her back, thumb pressing comforting circles into her back.

"You're so perfect," He speaks into the quiet. She tilts her head up on his shoulder, allowing him to see her beaming face

"Sirius, you are the most beautiful person I've ever known," Her tone is impossibly soft, as his heart in that moment. The sincerity in her voice makes his whole body feel warm.

He feels too overwhelmed by the sickly sweet love in his chest to come up with much of a response, instead he presses his lips to her forehead an action so full over love and comfort it almost hurts her chest.

"I'm gonna hate having to miss you again," She says softly, her settling back into his chest as he squeezes her closer

"Only ever a phone call away," He hums hand moving to toy with the ends of her hair

"You could visit?" She suggests, scared he'll laugh at the thought though she has no reason to be

"Anything, if you want me to do it I will," His promise makes her grin widely, she leans up to press a gentle kiss to his lips.

The quiet takes over once more, both basking in having the other in there arms again, a feeling they'd been craving in the years of absence.

"I'm sorry I left," She whispers, she'd wanted to say it a thousand times, truly she had.

"I'm sorry I didn't come after you," He pauses for a beat, he thinks maybe the question is too big, what he's asking of her too much. His eyebrows furrowing as he thinks, deep pout on his lips.

"What are you thinking about?" She questions, thumb gently smoothing out the lines in his frown

"Stay," He says it quietly, so quiet she almost misses it. "Please, I need you to stay,"

We could call it even You could call me "babe" for the weekend 'Tis the damn season, write this down I'm staying at my parents' house And the road not taken looks real good now

She hadn't technically said no. She hadn't said anything really.

She'd felt like an idiot, sitting up in the bed to better at Sirius. Blinking as her mind raced, what if she did stay? what would she be staying for? would he finally be ready to commit to her or was he asking her to give up the career she worked so hard for to be around when he wanted a casual fuck?

"Say something," He hated how much his own voice sounded like it was begging, he hated the look in her eyes. The guilt. She was going to say no. He was certain of that as he looked at her.

"Say anything," He doesn't mean to sound angry. Doesn't mean to make her feel bad.

She's left, blinking as she desperately tries to gather her thoughts. He gets out of bed.

His movements around the rooms are sharp and hurried, tugging his clothes back on.

"Sirius," She says, she needs him to look at her. Needs him to stop for a second, to talk to her.

"No," His hands tug his jumper over his head as he moves towards the door

"Stop. Sirius, please just wait," She clambering out of the bed to follow him, grabbing her pyjama pants and pulling them up quickly as she reaches for the large knit sweater. She's following him down the stairs of the silent house.

He slams the front door in her face before she has the chance to follow him out into the snow. She hears the revving of his motorbike before the engine kicks in, hears the way it fades away as he races into the night.

She feels like an idiot. Feels pathetic as she sinks to the ground, back pressed to the front door. She had vowed a long time ago to stop crying over Sirius Black yet she can't stop herself.

"What's going on?" Remus is calling. Woken up by the sound of the slamming door. She wipes at her tears, desperate to hide them from him but the second he sees her and sends her a soft smile she's blubbering all over again.

"He left. He fucking just left," She's hiccuping through her crying, and he joins her on the old wooden floor.

"What happened?" He asks gently, a comforting hand squeezes at her knee.

"We slept together,"

"Ok, ok and then he just left?"

"No. He asked me to stay and I- I froze Rem. I sat there like an idiot and didn't say anything. He just- I needed to think and he wouldn't give me fucking second,"

"What would you have said?"

"I don't know what he wants. If he wanted to try like really try I would have said yes,"

"He needs to know that,"

Time flies Messy as the mud on your truck tires Now I'm missing your smile, hear me out We could just ride around And the road not taken looks real good now

She hadn't been to his apartment before. Remus had apparated her there and waited with her in a comfortable silence until he'd arrived. Sat on the curb outside, her head on his shoulder. Knowing he was home Remus left, she was safe on the busy London street, Sirius wouldn't let any harm come to her despite the deep sigh he lets out at the sight of her.

"I wanna be alone,"

"Too bad. I need to talk to you," She demands, arms crossed in front of her.

"We can talk later,"

"No Sirius. You don't get to say all that shit to me and then just leave,"

"Fine. come on,"

He leads her in an awkward silence up into the building, refusing to look at her in the short elevator ride to the 8th floor.

His apartment is very him, it's cosy and homely and smells like the Gryffindor common room.

He drops onto the sofa in the living room, she's too busy eyeing the framed photos on the wall, heart melting a little at the photo of the two of them, both in school uniform sat by the black lake her head on his shoulder his arms holding her close to him. Matching bright grins staring back at her.

"You wanted to talk," He reminds, embarrassed that even after rejecting him she's seeing his framed photo of her.

" The other day, at the party You asked me if I regret leaving? I lied. No I didn't lie. I just- I didn't tell you the truth. I regret it, every fucking day I regret it, I lay awake every night thinking about what we could have been if I'd stuck around,"

"It's a little late for that," he grumbles, arms folded and a stoic look on his face

"Could you just listen to me?" She snaps, "I've been in love with you since I was 14 Sirius and you have never ever wanted a relationship,"

"That's not true," He protests

"Oh. So you just didn't want one with me?" She feels like an idiot, standing in front of him. Their friends were wrong, she was wrong.

He hates the hurt in her voice, the tears in her eyes.

He's on his feet now, passing over the burgundy rug to grab her hand in his

"That's not what I mean. I just- I was scared, scared if you were mine and something happened. I couldn't have lived through that,"

"You never told me that, you always just said you weren't a boyfriend guy,"

"I could be. For you I could be,"

"Why did you leave?" She questions, desperate to know why he couldn't have given her just a few minutes to work things out

"I couldn't hear you tell me that you don't love me enough to stay,"

"I would never say that,"

"No?" He questions timidly, his eyes searching her desperately

"No," She shakes her head "If I stay this can't be what it was. I'm giving up my life here. We are older now and we are safe and this has to be real,"

"It's always been real to me. I'm in love with you, been in loved with you since second year and I will be until the day I die. So sweetheart, please, please be mine? for real this time,"

"It'll always be you Sirius," She promises, his lips kiss her and she feels herself fall in love with him all over again.

And it always leads to you and my hometown It always leads to you and my hometown

#harry potter fanfiction #sirius #sirius black x reader #sirius black #harry potter #sirius orion black #sirius x reader

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lamonnaie · 5 months ago

Note

📓

ooh ty for playing anon 🫶

Put "📓" or some other version of a book emoji into my inbox and I'll explain the plot of a fanfiction that I haven't written but daydream about!

recently been thinking about what saintshin would do if the other died, which led me to plan out a whole our skyy-esque 2-ep special based around it (it's not what you think it is ahskdfjk, don't hate me until you've read til the END ty <3):

Ep 1

Set 3 to 4 years post-canon, ep 1 starts with saintshin in university, they're properly living together, they finally got their shit together and are dating now, and overall everything is going great and they're just really happy.

It'll be set towards the end of their uni days, so maybe they started off sharing a dorm but they've moved into an apartment together now. It's small, barely enough room for all their things, but it's enough for them, to have a place of their own, a shared closet, matching mugs, a bed they bought together (one of their first purchases)

Of course they still have issues in their lives, maybe Shin's struggling with his soccer career, maybe Saint's trying to balance work and uni now that he has the motivation to actually put effort into his studies, but they go through everything together, and the ep just gives us an insight into the domestic lives of saintshin <3

That is until saint gets into an accident, maybe while he's on the way to pick up Shin after training. Half an hour passes and Shin's a little annoyed that Saint's late without warning him, and then an hour ticks by, then two, and Shin's getting more and more panicked, calling up everyone he knows, trying to figure out where the hell saint is.

And then in the last couple minutes, Shin picks up a call, we don't hear much of it (neither does Shin), but we do hear something along the lines of "Khun Thamnitit Nitiroj was in a fatal accident earlier tonight. We're sorry to say that he didn't make it." (yes shin is his emergency contact)

The ep ends with Shin dropping the phone, tears already streaming down his face, looking absolutely devastated. (you already know nani would eat in this scene)

Ep 2

Ep 2 is set 4 to 5 years after ep 1 ends, Shin's given up soccer (what's the point when Saint isn't there to cheer him on), and now he's doing a job with the degree that was only ever supposed to be a backup

He's going about as well as you would expect, basically a shell of his former self, just going through the motions. He puts up a facade, and to an outsider, he would seem normal enough, maybe a little stoic (but nothing too out of the ordinary for others, for the people who didn't know him before, didn't know him with Saint)

On Saint's death anniversary, Shin's friends bring him to hang out (they truly just want to help, make sure he's alright), but one of them (he's new to the group, a friend of a friend, Shin thinks) lets slip a random comment about moving on and trying to live normally.

Shin's angry about it no doubt, a million things he could say, but in the end he doesn't blow up, instead just resigns himself to their ignorance, knowing they'd never understand

Something something Shin had lost the fight in him when he had lost Saint

He goes home that night to have dinner with his mum, who's remarried now (he's kind and treats her well, Shin's happy she's found someone)

Shin's mum understands why Shin is the way he is now, and she doesn't try to tell him to move on, but he's heard the hushed conversations she's had with his step-dad.

His mum tells him to stay the night, Shin declines, wanting to spend the night in his and Saint's apartment (it doesn't matter how long it's been, it'll always be their apartment). He works now, and he could afford a much nicer place than what their uni budgets could afford back then, but he refuses to move out, all the memories of Saint still occupying the rooms.

And really, despite how he makes a decent amount now, he seldom spends it on himself. (what's the point if Saint's not there to share it with him?) He's paid off Saint's dad's debt, sponsored all of Chingching's schooling, he'll buy his friends things, he sends his mum money as well to make sure she's always comfortable. What little he keeps for himself, he spends on the bare necessities.

Once he heads out, hugging his mum goodbye, he goes to visit Saint's dad, who might be the one other person who understands even a little bit what he feels like.

Saint's dad had fallen off the deep end for a bit after Saint had passed, but Shin had made sure to visit everyday, one of the many promises he and Saint had made to each other, that they would take care of their parents. Slowly, he'd gotten himself back, for the sake of Saint, who was gone, for the sake of Shin, who was here.

He had expanded the noodle cart into an actual stall, a small place near the river, and things were going better for him too (Still, he never could bring himself to give up the alcohol)

So he and Shin sit there wincing through cans of cheap beer (neither of them liked it that much, but it had been Saint's favourite back on their uni budget, which meant they both always had a fridge stocked with it), reminiscing on memories, all the little moments through the years that neither of them wanted to forget

(If they were both crying by the end of it, well, no one else would know)

Shin would head out a bit after, not before hugging Saint's dad tight, telling him to stay strong, to keep going, for Saint (everything he did was for Saint anyway)

As Shin's walking back to the apartment (he chooses to walk, even though it's over an hour's walk, but he needs to clear his head), he calls Chingching, who's studying abroad - she sounds happy, tells him about how good things are going for her.

(Chingching knows what day it is, of course she does, and she misses her P'Saint so so much as well, that was her brother goddamnit. But she sees Shin's red eyes, and the dried tear tracks, and decides not to make things worse for him. She ends the call telling Shin how much she loves him, which finally brings a smile to Shin's face as he returns the sentiment.)

As he gets back to the apartment, the rooms dark the way he had left them, he can't help but feel a little suffocated. He blindly grabs for Saint's shirt (he's memorised exactly where in the apartment he's stashed various Saint memorabilia) and heads out again.

This time, his feet guide him on a familiar path back to the Siamwit campus. Kru Jan had kept teaching after them, and was now the principal herself. Of course, she had been devastated herself when she heard the news about Saint, and had been more than welcoming to Shin when he had periodically come back to the campus in the years after, wanting to just remember the familiar places he'd spent so much with Saint.

So maybe he was betraying that trust a little by coming here so late at night, the years he'd spent here having ingrained into his brain all the ways to sneak in and out.

He finds himself back on the rooftop, the place he and Saint had spent so many hours, fighting and reconciling and fighting again in those first few months after they'd reunited. After that, it had become like their own hidden place, so many classes skipped and afternoons spent sat here, side by side.

Shin sits down on the edge of the rooftop himself, reminiscing on all their memories there, and then everywhere. He finds himself talking aloud about it, glimpses of Saint coming and going as if he's imagining him there.

It starts off quite light, Shin's laughing as he remembers all the times they were goofing around, but it doesn't take long until he's outright sobbing, gripping onto the shirt as if it's the only thing holding him together, the threads already coming apart, worn away by the years that had passed (just like him).

And then - "I love you, I miss you."

And he jumps.

EXCEPT, just as he jumps, Saint's voice comes through "Shin! Shin!"

And we're back to real life, Saintshin are uni students, they're laying side by side in bed, in their apartment.

It had started as an innocent enough question, the two of them cuddling in bed after a long day, exchanging hushed whispers about anything and everything, when Saint had randomly asked, "what would you do if i died?"

And the whole 2 eps (except for the first part of them being happy and domestic in uni) were essentially Shin narrating his answer, and ultimately getting kind of carried away, the tears in his eyes clear evidence of it.

But now, Saint is also tearing up from hearing it, refusing to accept that Shin would end his life just like that, insisting that Shin needs to live.

"How can I live without you there?" Shin says, so heartbreakingly earnest. He wasn't often like this, so loud with his words, but the late night, the quiet atmosphere with just the two of them, the too-vivid images of Saint being gone still fresh in his mind, were enough for this side of him to come out.

Shin explains how he'd have a duty to make sure his mum and sister are comfortable, to make sure Saint's dad is going well, so he would stay around just long enough to make sure that's the case. But any more than that, he's not sure how he would cope.

Saint still can't accept it.

So Shin counters with, "Well then, what would you do if i died?"

Saint doesn't even pause, "I'd die with you." "Huh?" "I don't have anything else to live for without you."

And if Shin wasn't already crying before, he certainly would have been now.

"Idiot," he says through teary eyes. "Saying that I can't kill myself, but you can?" And despite everything, that makes Saint laugh a little as it dawns on him. "Let's just promise each other that we'll try our hardest to stay alive, okay?" "Okay." And they fall asleep like that, intertwined in each other's arms, dried tear tracks on both their cheeks, but soft smiles still on their faces as they remembered their promise <3

BYEE this got so long ahjskdjf, basically the whole fic right here 😭😭 i'll probably never write it tho because i'm not the best with longer fics, but i have spent a lot of time thinking about it ahskdjfk, my ideal hsf special eps :))

Put "📓" or some other version of a book emoji into my inbox and I'll explain the plot of a fanfiction that I haven't written but daydream about!

#is this a little dramatic?#maybe #but i stand by the fact that neither of them would be able to go on if the other died #congrats if anyone manages to read the whole thing 😭🫶🫶#feel free to leave some more emojis if you'd like more rambling (i promise it'll be shorter next time ahskdfj)#high school frenemy #saintshin #high school frenemy fanfiction #lam.text #sun tag

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