#notesbyash

[notesbyash]

27.04.25

Big fan of an espresso tonic.

Weather’s turned for the better; sun has returned and everything is beginning to flower, to the detriment of my allergies. But nice weather warrants espresso tonics again, so there’s that small delight to enjoy amidst everything. Time of pressure in the PhD program again. Acquaintance of mine dropped out of the program a bit ago and gave me a small notebook before leaving. Mentioned knowing how much I like writing on paper and felt it was an apt parting gift. Aim to honor their intent by getting good mileage out of said notebook; in tandem with my normal spiral bound, it has thus far served its purpose well.

🎶 Sweet Life - Frank Ocean

[nyxscave]

a fun lil catch up tag game! ❣️

ty sm for the tag @notesbyash!

the last song you sang aloud: ... Taste by Sabrina Carpenter. I KNOW. It's good ok sue me

your favourite crisp flavor: any that isn't bacon

the last book you opened: Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman, because I'm in the middle of an anxiety crisis and I feel like torturing my brain more by looking up mental health stuff at a time like this :)

earbuds, headphones, or nothing: one earbud 24/7, always in the right ear

the last place you went, other than home: my presentation/class, will talk about it in the next post

a color that looks good on you: always black bc I can't be bothered to look up color theory

the last trailer you saw: the next hsr patch (sobs)!!

tagging: @meowingbackatcats @lost-rxverie @chiimi-png @angiospleen @silverstarsecrets @lostlibrariangirl @puffycinnabunny

[thats-cantorintuitive]

@ chemblr can anyone properly explain me about the Slater type orbitals?

I have this theory: I know that the repulsive forces between electrons have been widely reasoned (in numerous research papers) to be causing the screening effect experienced by the electrons in the atom

But what if it wasn't? What if the shells in the Slater's themselves oriented in such a way to minimise the repulsions between the electrons that they seem to "enclose" ? I want to know if I can translate VSEPR theory and apply to this scenario? And if the orbitals within the groups that Slater had described had oriented to minimise repulsion (re: of course it isn't zero , but simply minimised ) to an extent that it could not significantly contribute to the screening effect?

But I need to understand the Slater type orbital functions properly in order to present my argument concretely

I'll just tag some of the stemblrs that I've been following for a while and the chemblrs that I know. Do help me out if you can, guys!

@notesbyash @chemblrish @hizerain @i-rationality @loopy-sucrose @chemcurie @roseinstem @sadcypher @bananamiii

[maaarine]

curious about what you think your theme is (re: that notesbyash post). would it be a spin off of ennea 1, maybe some expression of your soc instinct, something you feel expresses you best in your cognition?

I'm too jaded/depressed to see any theme or direction in my existence

[notesbyash]

18.04.25

Daily carries.

Need to keep reminding myself of the importance of ritual in my life. When I forget it, when I forget myself, I find myself feeling so adrift. Like I’ve lost something. Ritual grounds me in a way few things do. Writing as a ritual. Fragrance as a ritual. Water breaks as a ritual. Lip balm because I perpetually forget that last one.

🎶 Present Tense - Radiohead

[notesbyash]

09.05.25

The days feel long again. But at least the sunlight is nice.

🎶 Bye Bye My Blue - Yerin Baek

[notesbyash]

11.05.25

Perhaps I will finally pick up calligraphy this year.

Not fully, not seriously, just enough to derive a style between my normal writing and something like Copperplate for use in special occasions. At risk of sounding narcissistic, I do quite enjoy my handwriting. All it took was a bit of time, some diligence, and a dash of self-reflection to have something which reflects me back to myself in a small and delightful way.

🎶 6 Pezzi, P. 44: No 1. Valse Caressante - Ottorino Respighi

[notesbyash]

24.03.25

Reviewing coursework again.

I've fallen into a nice mix of digital and physical notes; a recent acquisition has helped the last few workflow pieces click into place. I've always struggled with finding a physical notes that feel flexible enough match my thought processes, but a combination of sticky notes and a refillable notebook seems to be working well. I'm delighted to be using my fountain pen regularly again.

🎶 Midnight Fiction - ILLIT

[notesbyash]

19.11.24.

I've grown to love noticing my things developing a patina. In my younger years I tried very hard to keep things pristine, to maintain the natural sterility of a new item for as long as I could. Every mark made through improper handling was a mistake, something I perceived as a devaluation of the object in question. Indicative of my mindset, perhaps; that constant desire for perfection.

Somewhere along the road, however, things shifted. I find myself now admiring the little nicks and scratches my everyday companions accumulate. A once black travel mug has scuffed to reveal the aluminum beneath, a matte pen has gained a luster. Rocks stick in the lug sole of leather boots, grooves marking where I wrap the laces around my ankles. A patina is unique to the individual, irreplicable. An indication of time, use, of enjoyment and familiarity. A reflection of myself and the life I've thus far led.

🎶 Truth Lies Low - Andrew Bird

[notesbyash]

10.10.24

As anxiety grows so too do notes on the wall. I feel as though they will grow to consume me, as though the fear will consume me. Wash over and through and leave someone else in my stead.

Is it strange to say that I’m curious to see what of me remains?

🎶 Dance of Death - Andrew Bird

[notesbyash]

08.11.24.

Sat outside. Touched grass. Work follows me even as I do.

🎶 Drawn to the Blood - Sufjan Stevens

[notesbyash]

10.06.2025

This month has the potential to define whether my summer will be characterized by MARINA's Cuntissimo or Radiohead's How to Disappear Completely.

It's so fun to have what once was your primary goal in life ripped away from you!

For now though, I listen to Mendelssohn.

🎶 Lied ohne Worte in F-Sharp Minor, Op. 67/2 - Felix Mendelssohn

[notesbyash]

01.11.24

Two posts in one week; what is this?

I began this blog years ago in an attempt to both keep myself motivated to study and to hold myself accountable. Less of the former and more of the latter now. Even more, it has morphed into a way to see progress, to delineate it somehow. Mark down the effort I'm putting in so that in the future, when I fall into a pit of despair over my perceived stagnation, I may return to this little space and prove to myself that I have in fact been working. I find myself wanting to keep track of just how much time I sacrifice to my work now. Wanting a marker of it all. It becomes so easy to forget.

🎶 Need Not Turn - Robin Adams

[notesbyash]

05.05.25

I have this tendency to lose track of how much it is that I know, how much I've learned. It is second nature for me to focus my attention on how much I don't know, to build myself a home in that feeling of lack and let it consume me. On occasion it is useful then, necessary, to step back and set all my notes out and see them. Hold them. To look at how far I've come, how much it is that I know.

And then I find a gap in knowledge and drown myself again.

🎶 Mama's Gun - Glass Animals

[notesbyash]

25.10.24

Returning to paper notes. As much as I love digital notetaking, nothing can quite beat the experience of writing with a good pen. Something comforting about the tactile nature of writing on paper, shuffling stray notes around, annotating and creating in the physical world.

As so, it's back to paper notes for me. Sort of. Still use digital notes for active classes but I've decided at least one of the courses I'm studying up on for my prelim exam ought to be done with physical notes. I need to see how concepts connect in physical space, put equations next to each other and notice the patterns of them. Tack pages on my wall and watch the post-it addendums multiply. In a month I expect to need to relinquish my corner of the office to them entirely. Maybe I should warn my office mates.

🎶 Orange Meet Lemon - Michael Andrews

[notesbyash]

05.11.24.

For better or worse, have started dabbling in fragrances. Used to wear Maison Margiela’s Jazz Club until it got too cloyingly sweet. It’s a dark scent, fitting of the name, but something about the dry down read too saccharine on my skin. Maybe it was vanilla; have never really liked vanilla as a scent note. Still, it’s been too long since I’ve worn it so I can’t quite remember what exactly put me off in the end.

Have been popping around in search of something I feel suits me more. I like the scents of woods after rain, of nature and mountains and a crisp north wind. Bitter coffee and black tea. Ink in new books. There’s a quiet delight in sitting with some new scents and enjoying a small bit of discovery.

🎶 Howl and Soar - Lazuli Vane