#otherwise i think its existence is so funny its confusing

[bugfail]

since i was reminded that the show exists. dude the only saving grace of helluva is the premise(?) goofy hitman demons being hired by sinners in hell to get revenge? yeah i like that! thats fun! i hear that and imagine some bad guys type show but with a bit more edge,,

then i look at the show and its like. dumb idiot shit yaoi for southpark babies. i tried to watch it for a (now ex) friend. i forgot a good chunk of it but i think i'd get more out of putting the office at 2x speed with a red filter over it lmao

[lilystyles]

wildest dreams.

part two of style, written by @lilystyles

my masterlist & style masterlist

authors note the very requested part two of style. i got lots of asks & reblogs & comments asking for more of style!H so i decided to write one for y'all. thanks for all the love on it. also there was one ask i got with the idea of y/n going on a blind date and i LOVED it so thank u anon 🩷

brief description y/n and harry start to see each other more and more. but it's a secret, things get complicated when emma sets y/n up on a blind date. harry doesn’t like it one bit.

warnings! slight age gap, SMUT (f!receiving, fingering, daddy kink, missionary, riding, very slight breeding kink, no condom, all the good stuff) sexual tension, mentions of drugs&alcohol abuse. wordcount: (around 15k words)

fratboy!older!bffsbrother!harry x younger!innocent!reader

* * * * *

Harry arrived at Y/n’s massive and buzzing share house almost twenty minutes before eight.

He’d parked his car nearby and quietly realised to himself on the walk up the driveway that he’d never actually been inside the sharehouse before. He had dropped her off a fair few times and picked her up a handful from here but Y/n preferred to come stay at his place. He couldn’t blame her, Niall’s place was similar he lived in one of the frats nearby campus. His room and the house were disgusting and Harry much preferred his clean quiet house with his sister. Even though Harry was in a frat too, he lived out of the house. The only reason those guys had welcomed him into the frat in the first place was because he was on the Uni soccer team and he was really good. His room was turned into a storage room for alcohol, dartboards, and bongs. Harry had hooked up with a few girls in there regardless of the lack of bed.

He felt a funny feeling in his tummy walking up the driveway, since when did he get nervous? He’d been with so many people he didn’t think that existed for him anymore. But this was different, this wasn’t just anyone this was Y/n. His Y/n. The girl from home.

He looked up at the house biting his lip, Y/n’s place certainly wasn’t as trashy as Alpha Chi Sigma, thankfully. Hers was a little ways off campus it was this old run-down brick house with two stories and eight rooms. It was jam-packed with students and actually threw quite a few parties, known on campus for its great big backyard and one of Y/n’s roommate Mike's weed brownies. Y/n didn’t care all that much when parties happened, she’d either invite Emma and they’d have lots of tequila and end up asleep in Y/n’s room, or she might even invite Harry and his mates too just for fun. Otherwise she just locked her room and escaped to the library or the Styles’ place. 

As Harry reached the big red door he knocked loudly and a short girl opened the door before his knuckles had even retracted back to his side. He recognised her from his Economics class, he thought. She was in some pyjamas and looked up very confused.

“You're not the Chinese guy.” She said eyeing him annoyedly, groans escaped the mouths of others inside, and he could understand their disappointment. “Who are you?”

This made Harry feel suddenly rather guilty for not being the Chinese delivery guy and he frowned, “I’m Harry, ‘m a friend of Y/n’s?”

“Upstairs third door to your left.” She said shortly opening the door wide enough to let him in before promptly sitting back down on the couch with a bunch of other students, they were watching what looked like a Japanese horror film. 

Harry shut the door behind him and made his way upstairs quickly, Y/n’s roommates didn’t seem all that friendly, he hoped was going in the right direction. As he reached the top of the stairs he heard music coming from one room that sounded like a rave and knew that definitely wasn’t Y/n’s room, he heard people chatting away in another, and when he was at the third door he saw a small sign on the door that said ‘Y/n’s Room <3’. He smiled at the familiar neat handwriting that was on so many birthday cards in his collection, and knocked on the door, with a few quick taps.

He heard some shuffling behind the door and it wasn’t long before the door swung open. There she was, his Y/n. Even though he’d only seen her a few hours ago it felt like a long time ago now. How did he already miss her?

“You're here early, Styles.” She said surprised checking the time on her phone in her hand. Harry didn’t seem the type to show up early, and normally he didn’t Y/n knew that about him from years of experience. He was even late to his own birthday parties and if you asked a single person who had hooked up with him they’d say he was always late when they invited him over. Just his way. He wasn’t a timely person.

Harry smiled down at her form, she looked much more rested than this morning. She had taken a nap for a good portion of the morning and a long shower cleaning every inch of herself, she felt very rejuvenated now. The warm water had soothed her aching muscles and small bruises that littered her body from last night. She’d washed off all the sweat and alcohol that had sweated out of her this morning, and her hangover had eased, thank god. She had taken some aspirin for her head too and drank lots and lots of water. 

She looked so soft and cosy, the golden light of her room hit her face, showing all the angles of her calm expression. She was wearing this matching tracksuit set that was a blue almost grey colour, and some fuzzy pink socks Emma bought her for Christmas last year. Her hair was freshly washed, dried, and styled in her usual way. Her beautiful face was bare of makeup only some moisturiser that smelt really good, and her lips were covered in a glossy lip balm.

“Wanted to make a good impression, Babe.” He said smirking. 

Y/n let him join her inside shaking her head, it was very unlike him to be on time and she’d expected he would arrive around 8:30 instead of 8. He placed his bag of snacks and DVDs down onto her little bed taking in the space. 

Her room was so her, she had this big mattress on the floor that took up most of her room. Her sheets were mismatched shades of pink, blue, and lavender and she had about a dozen pillows. She had lots of fairy lights strung up, posters, and photos covering her walls. Her mattress and little desk by her window near the back of the room took up most of the small space. But if she had picked a bigger room that meant having a roommate so she didn’t mind all that much.

It was quite neat in here. She had all her desk organised with her laptop and textbooks. Her cupboard had somehow miraculously shut despite the large array of clothes stuffing it. She had a candle burning that smelt like cinnamon cookies, but underneath the candle was the underlying smell of her. Whether that was her laundry detergent or something that was just her, Harry didn’t know, but the smell brought him great comfort.

He shrugged off his big thick coat too, the day had turned into a windy-rainy one and he wanted to stay warm, but Y/n’s room was very warm inside. He was in an ashen grey hoodie with red flannel over the top, some black jeans and sneakers. His hair was unruly as always but he looked extra good today. He made himself comfortable on the bed grabbing a pink bear and cuddling it to his chest playfully. He dwarfed her bed with his tall form, and he looked so funny sitting in her bed. Harry Styles, sex god, player, and party animal, with a rotten attitude, was curled up in her bed. She almost wanted to take a picture to show people, but she knew she wouldn’t be telling a soul about him being with her tonight.

“I’ve known you for years I already have all the impressions needed, Harry.”

He looked over at her from her bed. “Yeah, but you’ve never seen me on a date before, have yeh? I can be wholesome.”

What? This is a date? 

Y/n blushed deeply, if she’d known that this was a date she would have dressed a bit nicer. She was just in some joggers and a hoodie, but to be fair to her they were her nice ones. The ones lacking ice cream stains and holes. Harry had seen her looking like a hungover mess, he’d seen her in the middle of the night at the library, he’d seen her with the flu, and she never looked bad even at her worst.

“This is a date?” She asked looking down at her sock-covered feet.

She’d been dreaming of this day since she was a kid when Harry had helped her when she fell off her bike and scraped her knee. She still remembered the day vividly, it was something she thought of every time they all went home to Holmes Chapel for the holidays or summertime, and they drove passed the playground. She still had the scar their on her right knee, even now. And she remembers Harry putting the bandaid on for her and kissing her knee to ‘take the pain away’. Every time she felt the little bump or saw the lighter patch of skin on her knee she thought of him kissing it. She’d stopped crying after he’d done that and from that day on, her heart belonged to him. 

She thought if they ever did somehow end up together on a date, that’d he would take her for a drive or they’d go to the cinema. Something normal. Maybe even a romantic stroll somewhere or something wild like skinny dipping. But instead here he was in her room making himself at home in her little bed where she’d spent hours thinking of him; before her eyes finally allowed her to sleep.

He laughed at her shy expression, patting a spot on the bed beside him for her to sit. “Wasn’t I obvious about that?”

She sat down beside him, laughing at herself she didn’t know much when it came to dating, she’d only had two or so boyfriends. She’d tried the one-night stand thing once but it wasn’t for her. She didn’t know dating etiquette. So she was all stiff beside him now feeling even more nervous than before he’d arrived. This whole thing with Harry frankly didn’t feel real, she’d liked him for so many years and only now was he starting to show similar feelings toward her, it honestly tripped her out a lot. It would be like your celebrity crush showing up at your door with flowers, a bit of a dream, right?

“Not to me.” She said looking at him. He smelt deliciously good beside her, and she wanted to devour him.

He looked over at her with the same eyes he’d given her in the kitchen when she’d comforted him, all soft and molten like an ice cream on a hot day. As he lifted his hand to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, she leaned into his touch, his hand was so warm and smooth against her face. He was so gentle with her and she felt her mind flashback to last night for what felt like the millionth time when his hands were all over her body. Though they’d been a bit wild, he was always gentle with her unless she asked him otherwise.

“Well I’m sorry, but this is a date, is that alright with you?” He asked, nibbling his bottom lip to contain a smile. She was just so cute, sitting there in front of him like a doe-eyed little thing. You’d have thought that she barely knew him with how she was acting.

She nodded. “Fine by me.” 

“Good to hear, Baby.” He sighed at her because she still seemed very nervous. He didn’t know how to comfort her other than touch. “Why are you so far away? You know I don’t bite, not unless you ask me to.”

She looked over at him, “I’m just nervous, I guess. If my fourteen-year-old self could see me now…”

She didn’t finish her sentence.

This made his heart swell. “You're nervous around me? Even after everything we did last night?”

She shrugged like that was an obvious conclusion. “Well, yeah…of course.”

This made him throw his head back laughing, like a little kid. “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little nervous too. S’okay to be nervous. But don’t worry it’s just me. Nothing special.”

That made her feel better, she looked up at him, a smile cracking on her face. “You're nervous too?”

He nodded. “Of course I am. I’m on a date with a gorgeous girl, I’d be a fool not to be.”

Y/n pecked his cheek in response, her lips smearing against the tiny stubble on his cheek, as she quickly moved away and opened the bag excitedly to see the things he’d brought. He brought snacks as requested all their favourites (peanut M&Ms, popcorn, and a tub of Ben & Jerry’s) along with a few DVDs. The one he had been raving about was in there and she grabbed it putting it on the very small telly she had by the end of her bed.

Harry explained a story about how he went to three different grocery shops to find the peanut M&Ms because apparently, the world was in a shortage today. This made Y/n want to kiss him because he’d gone to all that effort knowing Y/n’s favourite movie snack was M&Ms. Whenever they went to the cinema she always got them, and the three of them would go a fair amount. They loved going late at night and talking loudly in empty cinemas about how cheesy the films were. 

She looked at him from the edge of the bed. He’d kicked his sneakers off into the corner and he was resting on her bed, head lying on her pillow, a knitted blanket over his lap. He looked very comfy and at ease, and honestly, he was. The smell of her bed was comforting and the soft tone of her voice was soothing. Y/n had a way of driving him crazy, usually when her attention wasn’t on him, but a way of calming him instantly when their eyes met.

“You hungry? I want pizza.” She asked brows pinched in thought.

He nodded grabbing his phone to call them. “Sure. Joeys?”

“I think I want a ha—”

“Hawaiin with no pineapple, I know, you freak. Who doesn’t like pineapple?”

“Me.” She said. She’d never really noticed how observant Harry was until now. He knew her pizza order, he knew she liked peanut M&Ms, he knew her chamomile tea brand, and he knew she liked popcorn extra buttery. Which happens when you have history like they do, but she never thought he cared that much. So what if she knew he liked pepperoni with extra spice? She was obsessed with him for most of her adolescence, that made sense. But why did Harry know that? She was the obsessed one.

“Hey mate, yeah can I get a large Hawaiin no pineapple please, and large pepperoni extra spicy, and a loaf of garlic bread too thanks.” He said into the phone. 

Y/n told Harry her address in a hushed tone and he parroted it to the pizza guy on the phone. The pizza would arrive in 20 minutes from now, so Y/n joined his side happily and hit play on the telly. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder so she could rest against his side, and it all felt very domestic. Her cheek was resting against him and she felt her eyes drooping even though she’d already napped today.

Y/n normally cuddled with Emma and watched movies on her shoulder while Harry brooded on the leather recliner and complained when the girls picked a rom-com of some kind. But she saw him cry during The Notebook last month. He always said Spiderman was his favourite movie but she knew it was actually The Notebook.

She felt guilty at the thought of her best friend, and a pang in her tummy. Normally if a guy had even made eye contact with her Y/n was blowing up her phone with every detail, that’s what best friends are for. But she couldn’t tell her about Harry. They’d stop being friends. Emma and Y/n had many friends who had come and gone because of Harry, she didn’t blame any of them for shagging him. He’s always been attractive and shaggable, but she knew better than to get with him then and she didn’t know what had done it but lately, he’d just been irresistible last night and right now. 

Maybe back then she just had more self-control. Y/n remembers a girl named Cami the most. She and Harry hooked up once drunkenly at a party Gemma had thrown while Anne and Robin were away and the next morning Emma and Y/n walked in on her giving him a blowie. Cami was then banned from any other sleepover. Which was a shame because Cami was super nice, it made Y/n wonder if those years of friendship protected her from Emma’s harsh banishment or if that didn’t count. 

“What are you thinkin’ about?” He asked her playing with the strands of loose hair resting against his arm.

She looked up at him away from the telly she’d zoned out on. “I- Em.” She said.

Harry nodded. “Yeah, I knew it would be something you’d be thinking about.”

She sighed. “Yeah, I just- she’s gonna hate me, H. I want you, but you know I can’t.”

Harry knew Emma was Y/n’s number one person and they were basically like sisters, Y/n was a part of his family, though he’d never seen her in a particularly brotherly way. She came on holidays overseas with them, she was invited to family dinners, and they’d even had a Christmas Eve together a few times in the past couple of years. And that wasn’t something he would ever try and get in the way of, Y/n being there was what made him want to attend. Because he loved that Y/n was a part of his life in that way and he’d grown up with her, he loved having her around. He cherished those moments and even though he didn’t act like it, he would miss her when she wasn’t there. Last Christmas Eve she was with her Grandparents and he’d hated playing Scrabble without her.

She had no idea of any of his true feelings. Which was his own fault, he knew that, he was purposefully rude to Y/n to keep her at arm's length, and acting like she didn’t exist to try and suffocate his feelings from her. Emma was behind that, ever since he could remember he wasn’t allowed to share Y/n. Emma was always reminding him when his eyes lingered on her longer than they should, that Y/n was Emma’s best friend, off limits. And despite how he felt about her he’d listened to keep Y/n out of the drama of Emma’s wrath. 

But Harry cared for Y/n very deeply and he wished Emma wasn’t so weird about it. Why couldn’t they both just share her? And anyway, it was Y/n’s decision, not Emma’s. She wasn't a toy she was a person, who made her own decisions whether or not Emma approved. Normally Emma’s judgement was the only thing Y/n needed to make a decision, but when it came to Harry she had to disagree.

And anyway, she seemed pretty happy to be wrapped up in his arms right now, despite knowing what trouble it would cause if anyone found out. She knew it was wrong to lie, and hide, but she didn't think it was wrong be around Harry. That's what felt right.

“I know she doesn’t like people getting involved with me.” He began, “But that’s only because they always get hurt by me and it becomes a whole thing. But I would never hurt you.”

His reassuring words made her feel better but she looked up at him, with one more worry. “How is this any different than you and Cami, Lacey, or Tiffany—” She was about to continue her long list of girls but he cut her off.

“Because you're the only one for me.”

Y/n was about to ask him what he meant by that but the doorbell rang. “That’s probably pizza.” 

She sat up and left before he could say anything else. 

She was happy to be with him and she enjoyed his company and his cuddles but this whole thing scared her a lot. There were a lot of risks in going down this path with him and she was painfully aware of all the risks, she knew every single one and the reason she hadn’t gotten with him before now was because she knew it was dangerous for her to get involved with such a gorgeous devilish creature. 

Don’t get her wrong she trusted Harry with her life. But that doesn’t mean she trusted him when it came to his relationships. He’d never had a girlfriend, all the girls thought they were his girlfriends but he never saw any of them as more than a shag. Which is fine, but she knew she couldn’t be satisfied with just a shag. Her heart was too soft for that boy to only want his dick.

When Y/n came back with the warm pizzas burning her hands Harry was sleepily cuddling her bear in bed and she felt her heart melt and let her thoughts melt away too. They ate the pizza in bed and all worries were washed away as they distracted themselves with Y/n’s favourite film. When Harry Met Sally. 

Harry remembered the countless times this movie was on at midnight when he came downstairs to see Y/n asleep on his couch using it to tune out Emma’s snores.

Her eyes stung with sleep as she watched tonight, it comforted her, and the smell of Harry and the gentle sound of his heartbeat lulled her to sleep. She fell asleep quickly into the movie and Harry only noticed when he was getting no replies from her during his complaints about how cheesy and unrealistic this movie was. When he realised she was asleep right there on his chest he stopped talking and moving; wanting to let her sleep there. He grabbed the knitted blanket from the bottom of their legs and brought it to just below her chin. 

Kissing her forehead before focusing back on the movie. He thought Meg Ryan was pretty fit and the gentle breathing of Y/n was calming, it wasn’t long until he fell asleep too holding her very close to him. Not a worry about being caught, or oversleeping, just enjoyed the warmth of her body and the soft breaths that hit his neck.

It was a couple weeks later until Harry saw Y/n again and he hated to admit it to himself that he missed her, more than he’d ever missed anyone and it had just been a few days. She wasn't even his girlfriend, and she was already driving him up the wall.

She’d called him that afternoon and it brought out something in Harry he’d never expected to find within himself.

Harry was not a jealous person. He wasn’t possessive at all. Never had been and he never thought he would be. It just wasn’t who he was. He always thought it was because he just never had those feelings within him, he just didn’t care. He thought jealousy was stupid. What good came from it? Jealousy never accomplished anything.

He didn’t care if the people he’d been with had moved on or gotten with someone else, one time a girl he’d had a bit of a fling with for the Summer ended up hooking up with his best friend and he truly didn’t care. Like at all. They expected him to get angry, shout, or stop talking to them at least. But he didn’t he just shrugged and said something about how he understood. He found someone else to spend the night with quickly after their conversation, and when someone brought it up he completely forgot it had even happened, which shows how little he cared.

He just never got jealous, and it was something he felt was beneath him. Since he saw sex as such a casual and easygoing thing to him, he felt like he belonged to everyone and no one all at once and so he saw people as all the same. It was all just a blur of people and feelings. He was lucky, he never got sad after sex or disgusted he just felt a release, left, and that was that. He didn’t like to chat all that much, he was a fuck and leave kind of guy. If the person really needed a cuddle or some aftercare he wouldn’t just leave right away but he knew cuddling usually meant feelings growing, so he tried to avoid that at all costs too. Which to some was just awful to be around, and he could understand that too. Sometimes people wanted a connection that wasn’t just compatible kinks or sexual chemistry. Something deeper, love, burning lust, tenderness. That’s not to say Harry wasn’t a good lover, he was great no matter the person he could click well with them. He made them feel like they were the only two people in the world, but there was still a bit of a shadow to his love-making that made the people know that’s all it was.

Just a fuck, just a kiss, just an orgasm. Nothing more, nothing less.

He’d heard or read about people having sex that felt like fireworks or magic or something ridiculous and sappy and he’d thought it was all blown out of proportion. Sex was more primal and animalistic to Harry. It wasn’t something otherworldly. It was like eating, sleeping, or breathing. It was just a natural human experience and urge, and people needed it to survive a healthy life. It wasn’t tied to any emotions, just like eating a sandwich at lunch. Wasn’t anything to be ashamed of either.

And it certainly wasn’t ethereal, or at least it wasn’t until Y/n.

He hadn’t felt so connected with someone like that ever. In conversation, in sex, in life. She understood him, she accepted him, and despite their differences, it worked. And god, when they had sex it was just so time-stopping. Touching her was like touching heaven.

His jealousy, his attraction, made him realise he liked her. Like actually liked her, and that if this was what liking someone was that meant he never had before. He’d never liked anyone except her. 

He’d never wanted to date someone, take care of them, and be with them without having to do anything. Just be together, you know?

Harry wanted to date Y/n, take care of her, and just be with her. The unfamiliar feelings rolled through his skin like a tidal wave. All these feelings were new to him, and it meant he didn’t know how to act. It was overwhelming and he didn’t know who to confide in.

Because now all of a sudden he was a jealous person? It just didn’t make sense. None of it did. 

When he found out Emma had set Y/n up on a double date with her and Zayn, Harry was not one bit okay with it. He couldn’t have cared less if someone he’d been with fucked his best friend in front of him, but the idea of someone thinking they could talk to Y/n made his skin crawl. Someone getting to touch her like she’d let him, someone getting to kiss her sweet lips, whisper filth in her ear? He hated it. He hated the thought. 

Jealousy burned his skin like wildfire and he didn’t know what to do. He knew Y/n wasn’t his girlfriend, but they’d been on a date now which meant more to him than any other interaction with any girl he’d ever had. It had been a perfect first date that eventually led to her falling asleep in his arms and him playing with her hair as he memorised every freckle on her face. They both woke up the next morning with a giggle and she walked him to his car her hand in his, and to his surprise kissed him against the hood of his car. It was enough to have him dazed and wanting more, her lips smeared against his excitedly with an innocent giggle. When she pulled away she whispered a breathless goodbye and he hadn’t seen her since.

They’d called a few times and chatted until the early hours of the morning about anything and everything, and he’d seen her at his house a few times. But he wasn’t allowed to act how he wished because Emma was always there, he’d always call Y/n when she was home complaining about how he wished things were different. But since neither of them knew what was going on yet they knew it was best to not tell her.

Y/n didn’t want to go on this double date. She couldn’t think of anything worse. Zayn’s friend Peter was a notorious prick on campus. He was just straight-up horrible and so jarring on the senses. They’d met here and there and Niall hated him too which was enough for Y/n to know everything she needed about the bloke.

Y/n was pretty sure no one liked him, not even Zayn. But Y/n agreed for Emma’s sake. She knew Emma really liked Zayn (or so she said) and this was one of ‘the only ways their date would happen’. But that didn’t make her not want to go any less. She called Harry as soon as Emma left her place to get ready. 

He answered on the third ring.

“Hi, Baby.”

She could practically hear his smile. Things were going well for them. She thought the shift from whatever they once were to this would be awkward but it was easy. They were still teasing, and rude, but the words hardly had any edge anymore. Even when she swore at him it felt like a kiss and now when he stared at her Y/n noticed the softness in his eyes. Had that always been there?

“Hey, Styles.”

He sighed softly sitting down on his couch, “And to what do I owe this pleasure, Y/n?”

“Some bad news.”

He sucked a breath, “What’s wrong?” His voice melted into her spine, and he sounded worried. He was thinking the worst, and though this was pretty shitty it was nothing like he was thinking. He hoped she was okay.

“You know I like you, right?”

He nodded but forgot she couldn’t see. “Yes, I like you too, what is it?”

“I’m sorry, H, but I didn’t know how to say no without blowing our cover…” She said avoiding saying it. She didn’t know how he would react. He’d been so lovely, she didn’t want to hurt his feelings.

“Spit it out, Trouble.” He said.

“Emma begged me to go on a double date so she could be with Zayn.” She said pinching her eyes shut and practically wincing on the other line.

“And what did you say?”

“I said yes, I’m sorry,”

Harry felt a pang of jealousy rush into his chest unfamiliarly. But he didn’t want to make her feel bad. He knew she hadn’t meant to hurt him. She sounded so guilty over the line, he was just glad she couldn’t see him. He was embarrassingly jealous. He felt winded as his hand moved up to his chest, squeezing where the pain was. Normally he always knew the right things to say, but he struggled to find the words. He was just pissed.

Emma, totally got in the way time and time again. It’s like she was out to sabotage them. He wanted to tell her off, but he knew better. Y/n would be mad if he did that.

“It’s fine, we only went on one date.” He said, but it didn’t come out like he wanted. He wanted to sound aloof and fine. But his voice came out forced.

Y/n sighed, he was right they had only been on one date. But she felt that it had meant more to her than any other dates she’d been on. And she was sure it would mean way more than this stupid date. “I know. But I wanted to tell you that I don’t like Peter. I hate that guy actually, he’s a fuckin’ prick….” 

Harry despised Peter. Even more now. He got to be with Y/n all pretty in public on a date, Harry knew no one would treat her as well as he could. Harry knew what she wanted. What did Peter know?

“...But Emma asked me. And if I’d have said I was seeing someone else, involved in something serious, she would have drilled me like a Russian spy. You know that it’s very surprising for me to be seeing someone, she wouldn’t have let it go.”

Something serious. His heart swelled despite it all.

Harry let out a small laugh, “It’s okay, Y/n, really.”

“I don’t want to go, but it’s only for a few hours. Can I call you after?”

This made him smile, despite how pissed he was she was so cute. “Yeah, ‘course.”

“Okay, good, well I have to get ready, Styles, talk soon.” She said.

“Bye, Trouble” He hung up and his hands itched to do something. But he knew he couldn’t do anything he’d just have to wait for her call. The whole thing made him antsy. 

Just as he hung up Emma walked through the front door. She was holding some shopping bags.

“What are you up to?” He asked. They looked like clothes and shoes.

She looked over with a smile. “Me and Y/n have a double date.”

He acted surprised standing up, “Oh yeah? With who?”

“Zayn and Peter.” She said walking to her room and Harry followed, wanting to know more details he’d been too afraid to ask Y/n.

“When?”

“Tonight, at seven,” Emma replied quickly hands looking through her racks of dresses, eyes far from Harry who had sat himself on her bed.

“Where?” He prodded.

She looked over, “What is this? 21 questions? Why do you care?”

“I’m not allowed to be interested in your life? Gosh, forgive me caring, Em.”

She rolled her eyes. “I thought we’d grown out of the protective thing?”

“I just worry about you two. Boys are pigs.”

Emma sighed. “You would know.”

Harry rolled his eyes.

“We’ll be fine. It’s just at Andy’s Burgers. It’s super close to Y/n’s place. And your friends with those guys, you know they aren’t serial killers.”

His lips curled in disgust as his jaw clenched and defended himself. “Zayn is fine. Peter is not my friend at all. I hate him. He’s such a stupid twat. I don’t understand why would Y/n go out with him.”

Emma turned around her hands landing on her hips. “Because he’s hot and he’s supposed to have a big dick.”

This made Harry’s jaw clench hard. Peter better not try anything with Y/n, or he’d rip that dick off. “Why would Y/n care about something like that? Doesn’t she like guys with actual brain cells? Doesn't sound like her.”

Emma squinted, her brows pinching. “Like who, mate? It really is none of your business, Harry, we don’t question your awful taste. Anyway, I don’t see why you care? Y/n can get with whoever she wants.”

This made Harry’s stomach curl. No, she couldn’t. She could only be with him. He wanted her all to himself. No one was worthy of her, not even himself, but at least Y/n wanted him. She didn’t want Peter. She’d just told him he was a prick, she couldn’t want him.

Harry didn’t want anyone else, and he’d turned down a plethora of women and men since that night with Y/n in his bed. He’d avoided telling her that, to avoid upsetting her. He sat up, annoyed and beginning to feel his mind go on a loop of bad thoughts of Y/n with other people. Y/n kissing another boy. God, it made him feral with rage.

He shook himself out of the images pooling in his mind. “Whatever, I’m going to Niall’s. If you need me call me. Don’t let them drive you home if they’re drunk or summat.”

She nodded. “Thanks, H.”

He nodded getting up and leaving. “Bye, Em.”

“Catch ya.” She said. 

Harry grabbed his phone, wallet, and keys and left. He was gonna blow off some steam with Niall. Anything to get his mind off Y/n sitting pretty beside that dickhead ginger Peter. Thoughts of Y/n drifted to the back of his mind as he played Mario Kart with Niall and talked shit about Niall’s new boyfriend Paddy, Niall met his mates last night and they’d been proper twats to him and Paddy tried to gaslight him later on when they got back to his flat. Niall ended up leaving in a fit of rage. Harry tried his best at giving advice, he wanted to confide in Niall about this whole Y/n thing but he knew it could blow up in his face. Not that he didn't trust Niall to keep it hushed.

Y/n’s thoughts however were on only Harry, she would do anything to be on a date with him right now. They could be sharing a milkshake and talking about music or their days, honestly with Harry she would be happy to watch paint dry, his company made anything infinitely better. He was fun, he was cheeky, and she could be herself.

But no, she wasn’t with Harry, she wasn’t having fun at all. And she could hardly be her normal self one bit. She had to be quiet and polite when all she wanted to do was roll her eyes and spit out what a dickhead this boy sitting in front of her was.

She was sat beside the stupid prick Peter sipping down this actually quite delicious peanut butter & chocolate shake that was new on the menu and munching on some fries to keep her lips and hands busy while he talked her ear off. She loved the food here. She and Emma came here all the time to study and eat their body weight in their fries which have this great chicken and spicy salt flavouring on.

She just wanted the date to be over. He was so dull. The only thing he’d talked about the entire date for the past hour was him. His father’s business, how he could’ve had a career in Hockey if he didn’t injure his knee in his final year of school, and then making jokes about his ‘big’ dick and laughing like the complete and utter Tory he was. Which Y/n knew was a load of crap because one time he’d sent it to Emma during their first year of Uni and it wasn’t horrible but it certainly wasn’t some magical penis like he was saying.

Even just by looking at his face, you could tell he had no idea where the clitoris was. (Harry knew where it was blindfolded and you could just by the cocky look on his gorgeous face).

Y/n honestly thought it would’ve been less painful to slam her head between a door repeatedly. Zayn and Emma were hitting it off from the other side of the booth. They were leaning in closer, giggling, flirting. She was happy for Emma, really she was, but she didn’t see why she or Peter had to come. They added nothing to this date.

She was thankful when dinner arrived, it meant the date was almost over. She dove into her burger eating quickly so she could make an excuse to not talk or look at Peter. She hoped if she finished quickly the date could end quickly too.

“Are you girls going to that party on Saturday?” Asked Zayn taking a sip of his strawberry shake.

Emma looked at Y/n swallowing her mouthful of cheesy fries. “That’s the one at Harry’s Frat. Niall’s idea.”

Y/n nodded, she’d only go if Harry did or Emma really wanted her there. “Oh, dunno. Maybe.”

Emma smiled. “It sounds fun. I love costume parties.”

Y/n sipped on her shake and looked down at her lap her phone had a message from Harry on it. She’d check when no one was looking. She thought it was cute that he was checking on her.

“Hate those guys though. So cocky.”

Y/n looked up and without thinking scoffed, staring him down. “Who Harry and Niall?”

Peter looked over. “Yeah. Think their god’s gift because their football team’s the most supported at the Uni. Bunch of twats.”

“Can’t be any worse than you.” She said, and Emma was surprised eyes widening from across the table, Y/n’s words held a bite. But she knew that despite Y/n’s soft timid nature, she did not put up with people saying rude things about people she cared about. She was generally a calm, soft, and kept to herself kind of person. But if someone said something she didn’t agree with she always spoke up. “At least their only point of conversation isn’t about their less-than-thrilling cocks and daddy’s money.” She rolled her eyes.

“Calm down, Babe. It’s a joke. We are all mates here.” Said Peter.

Her brows furrowed as she looked at Emma, why wasn’t she saying anything? If someone had said something about either Y/n or Emma to Harry he probably would have punched them without even thinking. And Niall too, Y/n remembers one time some guy smacked Y/n’s ass at a party and Niall had to be pulled off him by three people.

“Are you dumb? Niall is our best friend and Harry is Em’s brother, you really think we aren’t going to be annoyed if you talk shit about them? Who do you think you are, huh?” She said turning to look at him.

Emma diverted the topic to something else and eventually, when Peter and Zayn were talking about Hockey, she made a signal for Y/n to follow her to the loo. Y/n was still pissed, and very ready to go home, she felt herself stewing in the corner her rage burning up under her skin. She didn’t understand why Emma hadn’t said anything, and that frustrated her more. She really hoped Emma was devising a plan for their escape but when they stepped inside the bathroom Emma stared at herself in the mirror reapplying her lip gloss she said something Y/n very much did not want to hear.

“I know Peter was a dick, but did you really have to have a go at him?”

This made Y/n even more annoyed than before, she’d only come on this fucking date for her and now she was complaining about how she acted when Peter was the one acting like a prick. Y/n didn’t see why she was at fault.

She and Emma never argued, Y/n didn’t like this. Emma was always on her side, even if Y/n had been in the wrong Emma would always be on her side. And anyway, she was protecting Harry and Niall. Not just anyone. She didn’t go out of her way to make the conversation turn into her having a go at him.

“Yes. I did. I only came on this date for you so that you could be with Zayn. Which you could’ve done without me and Peter. He’s awful, and you two could’ve just gone and done something on your own I don’t see why I had to be here.” She said, arms folding and Emma watched her. 

“And you know I don’t like when people are rude about our friends.”

Emma nodded. “I know Babe, sorry. I just didn’t want you to feel left out. You never go out with guys, I didn’t want to make you feel bad if me and Zayn start dating, you know?”

Y/n’s brows pinched, she was acting like that wasn’t Emma’s fault. Every boy she’d ever liked other than Harry, Emma had stolen or taken away. It’s like she wanted Y/n to be all hers. Not that it bothered Y/n much, if she couldn’t have Harry should didn’t want anyone anyway. 

“I don’t care about boys.”

Emma sighed grabbing her hand. “I know, but it wouldn’t hurt to put yourself out there, Babe.”

“Okay, sure, I see your point. But Peter? Really?”

She laughed. “Yeah, your right, he isn’t really your type. But he was the only available one on a Friday night.”

Y/n rolled her eyes playfully. “Yeah, wonder why.”

Emma tucked a strand of Y/n’s hair behind her ear. “Can I ask you one last favour?”

Y/n frowned eyes sharpening. “I’m not shagging him.”

Emma laughed tossing her head back. “No, not that.”

“Then what?”

“Can you get a lift home with Peter instead of me? I invited Zayn over, Harry’s gone to Niall’s for a bit. I need a good shag, and I need it now.”

Y/n sighed, a big groan leaving her lips. “Fine. But please make this date end soon. I don’t want to miss Murder She Wrote which starts at 9.”

Emma laughed. “Okay Grandma, don’t worry you’ll be tucked in bed in 30 minutes I can guarantee it.”

They stepped outside the loos walking back to their table and Y/n sat down on the side with Peter, sitting as close to the edge as possible. While the three were wrapped up in conversation Y/n quickly checked her phone she had a message from Harry still waiting for her reply.

Harry Styles 🍒 

Call me as soon as you're home. Miss your voice.

This made her smile to herself, hearting the message before returning her attention back to the table. The three of them were talking and Y/n felt herself zone out staring out the window. Rain was dripping down against the windows. She was just thinking of Harry, and internally screaming at the fact she wasn’t on a date with him right now. He had become more clingy than she’d expected over the past few weeks, he called her a fair amount and they snuck talks in private when they could but they hadn’t had a chance to go on another date yet. The way he was so kind and clingy to her was honestly shocking, normally he was the best at a fuck and ghost. She assumed he’d do the same, which she knew she’d just pretend to be fine with and then probably lose her shit when she saw him with another girl.

But nothing had been as explosive as she thought it to be, and that was probably because Emma hadn’t the faintest idea. 

By the time everyone finished their meals Zayn and Emma made a dash for it. Leaving their money on the table with the cheque. Zayn paid half and Peter paid the other. Emma kissed her cheek and patted Peter’s shoulder before the two raced away, giggling. Y/n was cranky at the fact Emma had only thought of herself the whole night and sighed leaning back into the seat of the booth. More than ready to leave.

Y/n frowned to herself as Peter seemed totally intent on keeping her there for a bit more of a chat. 

She tried to be polite about needing to head home. Making up some project she needed to do, but Peter’s hand slid onto her knee and she felt disgust crawl up her spine. She felt uncomfortable.

“Maybe we could just pop into the loos then, I bet your into that kinda thing. Can tell."

Y/n’s jaw dropped and she pushed his hand off quickly, she tapped her phone and Harry’s number dialling instantly. He was in her favourites. She needed his help, she knew he would come. She brought the phone to her ear.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” She said lips curling in anger.

Harry picked up on the second ring. “Hi, Baby.” He said, raspy. There was lots of noise, he must’ve been in the car driving home.

Peter grabbed her wrist and pulled her close. “C’mon, don’t be such a prude. I paid for your dinner. You owe me at least a blowie.”

Harry, spoke over the line into her ear. “Y/n?”

She snatched her wrist out from his rough palm. 

“Get off me!” She shouted and grabbed the last of Emma’s milkshake from the table and threw it onto him. He flinched at the cold milkshake hitting his skin, his Ralph Loren polo was now caked in thick pink liquid, and his ginger hair was now soaked and dripping down over his eyes as he gasped. 

“Bitch!” He shouted, wiping his hand over his eyes.

“Fuck yourself, you pathetic fucking prick.” She shouted pointing her finger at him. Harry had heard the interaction and his fingers curled against the steering wheel, knuckles turning white from his grip. He put his foot on the pedal. He was already turning the car around in her direction.

“Sorry, can you pick me up please, Harry? Peter’s a creep, I need you.”

“Of course, hang tight I’ll be there soon.”

Peter was shouting at her like the pathetic baby he was and some waitresses came over to help clean up the mess she’d made by throwing at him. 

“Sorry,” She whispered to the cherry-haired girl who came over with a cloth and spray. The girl just laughed as Peter rushed over to the manager who had come out at the sound of the ruckus. 

“It’s okay, he seems like he's a bit of a knob.” She said looking over at Y/n. 

“Are you alright?” The blonde waitress asked from the other side of her.

“Yeah, he’s just a handsy asshole,” Y/n explained.

It took only a few minutes before the doorbell rang above the entryway door and Harry entered the restaurant. He looked dishevelled and his eyes were wild as he stepped inside. His hair was wet from having walked from his car to her, the thunderstorm outside had soaked him. The top of his grey hoodie was speckled in rain, and his eyes were all stormy and this dark green that Y/n melted over. He made his way over to her and she felt herself forget for a second why he was here. 

She was just happy to see him.

“You okay?” He asked and she nodded, feeling relief flood her tummy. Harry always made her feel safe. He’d always felt like her protector even growing up. She remembered one time at her school dance some boys were trying to get Emma and Y/n in their car, they were drunk as skunks and she remembered Harry racing over and Y/n’s whose eyes were glassy with worry and he actually rubbed her arm. Then he drove them both to the party and made sure they were okay the whole night. He’d made her feel safe then too.

He rubbed her wrist, almost the same as that night at school. His thumb stroked it softly, as his eyes darted from hers to Peter who was still there. Covered in a milky pink drink, and swearing angrily.

Harry made his way over to him and grabbed him by the collar, in a rush of anger. He was bursting with anger and Y/n watched him surprised in her spot by the waitresses. She watched silently, expecting Harry to just tell him off. But he did more than that, Harry’s fist connected with Peter’s face and it made a slap, and he fell back onto the counter of the register with a bang.

His nose was bleeding upon the impact.

“If you ever touch her again I’ll fucking kill you. You hear me?” The calmness of his tone was actually chilling and Y/n felt herself tense up. Harry pushed him again. She knew if she let him he’d stay and pummel him for the rest of the night.

She walked over quickly and grabbed his arm softly. “C’mon, let’s just go. Can’t beat his awfulness out of him.”

“‘Can try.” He replied but ultimately he listened, pulling her into his side and they both apologised to the staff as they exited the restaurant. Harry’s hand slid into hers and she followed him to his car it was raining bad, big fat droplets hitting their faces as they walked steadily to the car. He opened the door for her and she slid in, he shut it when she was all tucked inside. The rain was coming down heavily and when he plopped in beside her he didn’t start the car, his hair was drenched and his eyelashes were thick with water. His face had turned soft again. He watched her for a beat. “Are you sure you're okay? I can go murder him if you want.”

She was silent for a second before turning to face him, she looked beautiful even with her frown. “Harry’s it’s fine. Can you just take me home?”

He nodded. She looked tired and frustrated, and in turn, this upset him. Y/n was too sweet to be treated like this. He wouldn’t let anything like that happen to her when he was around. He’d take care of his girl. The drive to Y/n’s house from the burger place really wasn’t far and she normally would’ve walked home if not for this heavy downpour of rain, and she had wanted Harry to be the one to comfort her. When Harry’s car pulled up outside the front of the house she looked over at him.

He was waiting for her to say she’d call him later and kiss his cheek but she didn’t. She looked up at him and sighed, bringing her hand up to push a loose curl away from his forehead.

“You wanna come up?” She asked.

He smiled. “You sure?”

She smiled bigger. “Yeah, come on.”

He turned the engine of the car off and just as Y/n went to open the door he said, “Wait.” 

She listened, watching as he bolted out of his side of the car to go to her side and open the door for her. She giggled at the gesture. Harry really wasn’t what people thought. 

He held his hand out for her to grab and she grabbed it as he helped her step down. The rain was heavy but neither of them seemed to care all that much considering they were both already soaking, and walked slowly up to her door. His hand was warm in hers and she shivered into his side. The rain had brought a chill to the air that nipped at her skin.

She unlocked the door and stepped inside pulling him in with her. The house was nice and warm, they’d been lucky enough to have an old fireplace still built in. It warmed the front rooms and meant their heating bill was much less since they only had to take care of a few small rooms. Harry followed her down the hall. 

This was the second time he’d been here, so now he knew where her room was he followed less nervously. The house was practically empty tonight beside from a few people in the living room and kitchen. Everyone must’ve been at one of the frat parties. She opened her bedroom door and they kicked off their shoes and socks that had gotten all soggy. 

Y/n shrugged her small pink coat off and put it over her desk chair. Harry stayed sort of stagnant behind her. Running his fingers through his hair. 

“Are y'cold, H?” She asked gripping the hem of her top, her back was facing him as she lifted it off. Revealing her lacy pink bra and bare back.

He felt his eyes widen and cheeks heat up. She yanked her jeans down and revealed a pink g-string that matched. It had bows on it, and it was all girly and pretty. Suddenly the wholesome urge to take care of her turned back into something a bit less wholesome. His cock twitched as she bent down to take her socks off. He had a great view of her plush perfect body. His hands flexed by his sides, and he looked down at his feet, did she want him to look?

She turned around running a hand through her hair, “Styles? You okay?”

She looked like a fucking dream.

He nodded looking up. “I- Yeah,”

She giggled. “What’s wrong?”

He rolled his eyes sighing, a smile remaining on his face. His cheeks had dusted in a soft pink that was unusual for him and only made Y/n more inclined to tease him. Roles reversed.

“Don’t play all dumb, you know you're fucking gorgeous. And I can’t exactly concentrate when you look at me like that.”

She walked closer to him as her hands slid under his hoodie and thick cotton t-shirt, hands grazing his skin. Her hands were cold, and he hissed slightly but made no movements to step back.  

“Like what?” Her eyelashes fluttered up at him. 

“Like that.” His hands slid around her back and down to cupping her ass in his big hands and bringing her closer to him. Their height difference had him bending down, ready to scoop her up into his arms.

She moved her hands onto his shoulders and pushed herself up on the tips of her toes, lips close to his. “Kiss me.”

He leaned down connecting their lips together. She pulled him closer, whispering against his lips. “‘M cold.” 

He leaned into her touch, she was gripping him tightly against herself. He pulled his arms away from her to lift his jumper off. She gripped the hem of his t-shirt and pulled that off too. His tattoos filled her vision and she wanted to bite and suck and lick and touch every single one of them. God, he was just gorgeous. And honestly, being able to kiss him was more pleasurable than any other experience she’d ever had. Kissing him alone was something she could do for hours. When Harry just looked at her that alone was more breathtaking than anything any other boy had done. To have him here in her room, kissing her, holding her, well it was everything she’d ever dreamed of. If her fourteen-year-old self knew she’d probably faint, scream, cry, and go into shock.

Her hands slid to his hips and gripped the button of his jeans, as his hands found her cheeks and kissed her again. She yanked them down a little bit revealing the fern tattoos she loved so much. She remembers him posting on his Instagram when he’d gotten them, Y/n practically choked on her water when she saw them. He was just walking sex. She wasn't any better than him, completely filthy in that head of hers.

He started walking forward and leading her back to her bed. She sat down on the mattress eyes wild looking up at him. His bulge was right in her eye-line and she smiled up at him, and she grabbed him to join her. He slotted in perfectly into her arms and his hips pressed into the thin string that was covering herself. He wasn’t ashamed that his cock was already growing in size in his pants, and he gently pressed it against her in hopes of some relief to his aching balls.

She sighed breathily into his mouth at the weight of him on top of her, she kept pulling him even closer. Their chests pressed into each other, and Harry was so warm, and Y/n was so soft. He could’ve stayed like that all night, in her arms.

He pecked her lips one last time as he pulled away to kiss along her chest. The little necklace she always wore that Emma had bought her was around her neck. It was the first letter of her name. His finger ran along it, stroking her upper chest.

“Should get a H.” He said before nibbling into the plush flesh of her tits. They were so warm and soft against his face. If he wasn’t so needy for her he’d just rest against them and sleep, smelling her delicious scent of that clean soft scent she always smelt of, it was so comforting to him.

She smiled and softly ran her hands through his hair, her legs were still wrapped around his back. “Why?”

He looked up, and suddenly all those emotions of jealousy and protectiveness were back rushing through him and making his hands squeeze her hips tightly. “So people know you're mine.”

This shocked her a bit and Harry was nervous for a second, he had revealed quite a bit of feelings in that moment and distracted himself with her neck. Kissing along her sweet-smelling skin. His lips were so gentle against her like he was afraid she’d break.

“And then what would you wear to show who you belong to Styles?” She said. Her voice was raspy and breathy from his kisses. His head snapped up and he smirked wickedly. 

“Well, why don’t you mark m’back with your nails like last time, and leave some bruises on m’neck until we can come up with a permanent solution?”

She smiled and felt her pussy throb at the thought. After the last time Harry was between her legs she’d ended up with bruises on her thighs, hickeys everywhere, and she was so sore it hurt to sit all day. She’d told him one night on the phone and he’d lost his mind over it. Loved the idea of Y/n being marked up from him, sore from their sex, unable to sit without thinking of him.

"Sound good, Princess?"

“Okay.” She replied content with his answer. Her lips formed in a pouty kissy face and he came up to press his into hers for a long peck, she smiled when he pulled away. How could he be so cocky and rude but also so soft all at once? He moved his way back down her body and kissed her hips sucking a spot into her left hip. His hand rubbed her stretch marks along there and kissed over the now bruised mark he’d made.

He moved further down until his mouth was right against her pussy. His nose brushed against the material as he looked up at her. “Gonna let me take care of you?”

“Yes, Daddy.”

He smiled. “You’re such a good girl f’me. Perfect lil' thing.”

“Thank you, Daddy.”

He loved when she slipped into that state of submission and obedience because normally, despite her calm presence, she basically never let Harry have anything without being teased. She was a bit of a brat to him, which turned him on an unfathomable about.

He pulled her knickers off and threw them to the side. As he spread her legs even further apart he moved one of her thighs to rest on his shoulder and the other he pushed forward toward her tummy, practically folding her in half. His ring-covered fingers gripped them and he leaned in close to her. The lips of her were like petals of a flower, splayed out and dewy. Her clit was puffy and swollen in arousal like the bud of a flower. He brought his free hand forward and circled her clit softly. Her hips squirmed into his hand and he heard her let out a shaky breath. 

“Ah,” She gasped when he leaned in closer and his breath hit her dripping pussy. It was cool and shiver-inducing and she could practically see his smile, even though her eyes had made their way shut.

He placed a gentle kiss on her clit and her hands moved to his hair quickly. “Please.”

He was teasing her and he loved the reaction it pulled from her. Now that they’d already been together once there was a certain familiarity in this. He knew what she liked and he was ready to explore things that he hadn’t already. Including taking his time and eating her out like he’d been thinking about since he was probably fourteen.

He looked up at her, her lips were in a pout of frustration. “What’s got you pouting, Princess?”

“Want you t’help me, Harry.”

“You can beg better than that, Y/n.”

“Please, Daddy.”

“Please what, Baby?”

“Please taste me, Daddy. Need your mouth. Want it.”

He smirked looking up at her. “‘Atta girl.”

She felt her clit throb at his raspy words. He leaned forward and licked a long stripe of her slick up into his mouth. She tasted tangy and sweet just like he’d imagined. His mouth watered at the taste, and he smirked. Once he’d tasted her he knew he wouldn’t be able to tease her any longer. He started moaning and grunting into her and the vibrations of it had her mewling and tugging on his hair.

“Fuck.” She cried out, neck arching into the pillow.

He was acting like a starved man and sucking onto her clit with such a hunger that it startled her. She hadn’t expected him to be so wild and good at it. She knew he was good, but Jesus, she was already feeling so much pleasure within mere minutes. He was suckling into her bud like a bee on a honeysuckle flower, all headily. The sweet nectar spilled onto his tongue as he kissed her lips, and practically devoured her whole. She was already feeling dreamy with the pleasure, floating with lust.

As he began to speed his tongue up and get more sloppy with his languid movements, she gained less control of her body. Her legs tried to shut on him and they were beginning to shake softly, he gripped them tighter and split her open for him.

His tongue lapped up the slick that was leaking out of her hungrily, and as he slipped his tongue near her weeping hole she let out a particularly loud whine and her back arched off the mattress. “Fuckin’ hell, feels good, Daddy.”

He pulled away for a breath looking up at her, rubbing his thumb over her clit in slow hard circles that had her eyes welling with tears of pleasure. “Yeah, sucha’ good girl letting Daddy eat this little pussy.”

She was bucking her hips and squirming under his tight grip. He could tell she was getting close as she ground against his face, her moans were getting louder and more desperate. Her slick was dribbling down his chin and he was moaning every few licks. He’d taken to rubbing his cock against the edge of the mattress for some relief, and Y/n coming on done from his touch was too much for him to stay still. He needed to relieve himself. Or he’d come his boxers, which he thought we be a bit pathetic. He wanted to prove to her how good he could be with her, how he liked to take his time when he could. But his neediness was making him have a little less control than he liked.

He continued eating her pussy with such a raw animalistic frenzy that her orgasm washed over quickly, taking her by complete surprise. Her tummy filled with waves of pleasure that shot all through her body as her muscles tensed and her pussy throbbed, she could feel herself clamping down onto his tongue as he groaned.

When she came it was with a desperate, soft, cry of his name. “Fuck, Harry.” She said, shutting her eyes and gripping his hair. “‘M cumming.”

“Cum for me, angel.”

She did. Hard. She felt like she had no control of her body as Harry talked her through her orgasm encouragingly. “That’s it, good girl.”

He’d slipped his fingers inside with ease and began curling against her. She felt herself fall back limp into the sheets as he continued licking and thrusting his fingers inside of her, and her hands moved to his hair once again pulling on it. Her mouth was loose-lipped and she found it hard to keep herself quiet now.

“Oh, fuck, Daddy,” She said breathlessly, all soft and quiet. It made him smile as he looked up at her, slick coating his lips. 

“Gonna be a good girl and let me make you cum again?”

She nodded biting her lip. “Mhm.” She said before throwing her head back when his fingers hit that soft spot inside her that she couldn’t reach with her own fingers. It made her melt and shake.

Harry noticed her reaction and smirked to himself. “Found it.”

As she watched him from between her thighs, his head bobbed and the muscle of his arms flexed, he was pinning her to the bed so that he could keep going. Her second orgasm found itself much easier, it took Harry a few kisses and rubs against her clit along with his fingers pounding into her until she came. 

Her legs moved to shut around his head and her nails were scratching along his shoulders and back. She kept repeating the words, “Please, Daddy.” Over and over, until.

“Oh, I think you’re gonna make me cum again.”

He kept his steady pace and sloppy kisses going, pulling away only to say. “Cum for Daddy, pretty girl,”

And she did. It was like his words had complete control over her. The ball growing in her tummy snapped and rushed through her. This time her whole body shook as she gripped onto his arms in support, she felt this release like a tidal wave.“Fuck, fuck, fuck,”

The tightness of her muscles flexing and her body shaking had her spent. She had never come so hard, and it for so long. It was a few minutes before she finally felt the pleasure subside to something more easy to take. 

She was mewling and babbling all drunken from her orgasm. “Jesus, H.”

He helped her through her second orgasm, kissing along her hips and thighs to give her swollen clit a chance to rest. When she finally came down from the peak of her orgasm, she went limp again, eyes shut, and for a moment there she couldn’t hear or see anything. She could only feel him. Feel what he’d made come over her.

When she looked down at him he’d pulled his fingers out only a few centimetres away and his mouth was damp. His chin was covered in slick and as she began to take in his appearance. His neck and the top of his chest was dripping. She was confused for a second, it couldn’t be sweat. Despite their intense state, she knew he couldn’t be sweating that much. And then she realised. 

“Oh, I squirted, sorry.” She said embarrassed trying to shut her legs. He looked at her like she was crazy moving back up so that his hips were between her thighs.

“Sorry? What are you on about? You squirted f’me, and you looked beautiful doing it too. Absolutely nothing to be sorry about.”

She smiled, still feeling shy and blushy. She’d squirted on his dick before, but certainly not his face. She hadn’t expected it to feel so good. “Thank you for making me cum.”

He smiled, and despite his rotten mouth and dominant cocky rough edges, in that moment he looked all soft and gooey and truthfully the fact he got to see Y/n so soft and vulnerable around him made him eternally soft for her. He wanted to see her like this all the time. Red-faced, pouty lips, eyes glassy in pleasure, and words slurring from complete satisfaction. Something only he got to see.

He wanted to be the only person who got her to squirt all over his face. Wanted to be the only one to taste her sweet little pussy. He wanted to be the only man for her. He felt so possessive over her like a kid not wanting to share his favourite toy. But he knew at the end of the day, it was always going to be her decision who she was with. 

But Y/n thought that over the years it was pretty damn obvious who she wanted. 

Harry was the only one for her. 

She wasn’t in some other boy's bed tonight, she was with him right now, running her nails softly along his arms despite how needy they both were for each other. She was slow with her touches like they had all the time in the world because really they did.

It was raining so heavily outside, the wind was howling wildly rustling all the trees nearby, and the thunder roared above them. The shelter her little room provided them with was perfect, and it felt like all time ceased to exist. The sky had turned dark and so had their eyes, her room was almost pitch black, and they were both so warm and close. Skin to skin.

Y/n was right here, naked, and waiting for him. 

Things weren’t so bad after all.

He placed a soft long kiss on her lips and she could taste herself on his tongue. Things tonight felt different than the first time, although Harry was fueled and fiery with jealousy and he wanted to take her roughly, it all felt more intimate.

His hands moved to her hips squeezing the plush flesh and running his hands over the stretch marks that decorated her skin. Every inch of Y/n was beautiful, and he’d never thought that before about anyone. He’d never seen someone's hands and thought what absolutely beautiful hands they had, or what beautiful teeth they had, or how cute their ears were. There wasn’t a part of her body that he wouldn’t worship. 

To him, she was the picture image of beauty.

The kiss deepened as he rolled them over. His head rested where hers just had, and he could feel the warmth her body had left behind. She sat right up against his cock, and she could feel him throbbing against her. His old thin boxers left little room for him to hide his aching want. He was honestly rock hard, watching her cum twice, feeling her, tasting her. It had him so hard he could’ve cried.

Her tits were right in his eyeline, all soft and full. He took one into his mouth sucking on her sensitive nipple, and enjoying the loud whine she let out. His hands had fallen to her ass now, and she’d taken to grinding against his clothed cock. He could feel the wetness of her leaking down onto his boxers and he wanted to stuff her full. Despite her two orgasms, Y/n was still managing just fine on top of him.

She pulled back just slightly so she could grip the hem of his boxers and tug them off. His cock sprang up against his tummy, and even though she’d seen it before she’d probably never get used to how fucking big and gorgeous his cock was. The pink ruddy tip that glistened in precum, his long veiny shaft, that girthiness he had. God she could stare at it for hours, she thinks he is beautiful in the way those ancient paintings of Greek gods were beautiful. His hair was unruly and curly and fit for a golden wreathe to sit, his body all muscular and tanned, his absolute manliness. Something about how capable he was was just enough to have her squirming her thighs.

If she was to paint him, she’d want him to look something like this. Messy, needy, and staring right at her. She moved her hand to grip his cock giving it some gentle strokes, he was hissing already. Her hands were so warm and soft, and she pursed her lips and spat down onto him, allowing her to stroke him faster.

“Such a pretty cock, Daddy.”

He let out a laugh through his moan, “Pretty?”

She nodded. “Just like the rest of you. Beautiful.”

He felt his cheeks warm in a blush. No one had ever called him that before. She was still stroking him and he felt his eyes begin to squeeze shut in pleasure. His hips rutted up into her hand a few times.

“Want to feel this pretty cock, Daddy, please,” She said, her voice in a gentle begging tone.

He opened his eyes and smiled his hand moving from her hip to her cheek stroking it with his thumb. 

“Come sit on it, all yours to sit on, Princess.”

She smiled up at him, kissing his jaw and letting go of his stiffy so that she could move her legs up the bed. When she was hovering over him she placed her arms by his shoulders ready to slide onto him when he stopped her. 

“Wait, condom?” He asked, kissing her nose. 

She shook her head. “Wanna feel you, s’that okay?”

He felt his cock twitch at that. “Yeah, I’m clean, trust you. Want that too.”

She smiled leaning forward to place a kiss on his lips. Her hand grabbed his dick and brought it up between her slick folds, collecting the wetness. She slowly slid down onto it and felt herself stretching for him, her two orgasms allowed more room for him to glide into her easily, but no matter how wet she was his cock was always going to stretch her out.

When she’d made it halfway she looked up at him, “Y'big, sorry,”

He just pushed some hair away from her face, kissing her jaw near her ear. “Take your time.”

Eventually, she made it hilt of him, sitting down on him softly. They both let out heavy sighs at the feeling, she felt so full of him. He was so deep, she could see the bulge of him in her tummy. She leaned her forehead against his shoulder and his hands massaged her thighs softly. If not for their burning desire Harry could’ve stayed just like that for hours. His back against the wall, her resting against him, cock all warm inside her. It was perfect.

She eventually lifted her head up and smeared their lips together in a messy gentle kiss. Her arms wrapped around his back in an embrace as she began to lift herself up and then back down slowly. The stretch starting to burn in pleasure now, and the pain subsiding. He moaned into her mouth loudly as she started to pick up a rhythm of deep hard thrusts. The tip of him was hitting that spot that had her eyes rolling back into her skull as she started to find the rhythm that was right for them both. She was going slow yet hard and deep, it had her pussy clamping down against him which was sending him up the wall.

Her pussy was to die for, so tight, and perfect around his cock. Wet and warm. He wanted to bury himself in it all hours of the day. Her lazy bounces started to pick up as she gripped his shoulders for leverage. His hands moved from her hips to her ass, gripping her tightly as he began to pump his cock up meeting her bounces. He was moaning and grunting into her neck and tits at the feel of her tight pussy, he started kissing her all over.

It was a beautiful sight, his pretty girl's tits bouncing right in front of his face, and her moaning against his cock. He couldn't help but smile, a devilish one.

“Daddy, fuck,” She swore. She was getting close again. Her previous orgasms had her so sensitive to his touch.

One of his hands came forward and began to rub messy circles against her puffy clit. She let out a whine and shut her eyes bouncing as if her life depended on it, his other hand squeezed her ass kneading it roughly, as he thrust his cock up into her pussy.

“You’re Daddy’s good girl aren’t you?”

This made her let out a particularly loud whimper.

“What was that, Princess?”

She just let out another noise of pleasure.

His hand moved up to grip her chin so she’d look at him. “Say it, Y/n. Tell me.”

“I’m your good girl, H.”

He frowned. “H?”

Her hips were stuttering on his cock and the hard rubbing against her clit. “I’m your good girl, Daddy.”

He smirked. “Who’s little pussy does this belong to?”

God, he was filthy. She fucking loved it. It’s what she’d imagined him to be liked. Raw, rough, filthy, dominant, and possessive.

She cried out as his thrusts began to speed up. She was dizzy with it all, struggling to speak.

Her voice came out hoarse and breathless. “Yours,”

“What’s mine, Y/n?”

“My pussy, it’s yours. I'm yours.”

He smirked. “Good girl, sucha' good fucking girl.”

His thrusts caused her entire body to jolt forward, as her nails scratched down his arms and she began to scream at the pleasure. 

“That’s it, take Daddy’s cock,”

She gripped his arms for dear life, “Gunna’ come again. Ah, mm, fuck.”

He didn’t stop for a second and it was only a few thrusts until she was squirted all over his cock and shaking wildly. He could tell he’d fucked her hard because she was practically limp on top of him when her orgasm subsided, she was spent. Harry had ruined her. Three orgasms, three mind-blowing orgasms, she didn’t know if she could handle another.

He kissed her lips. “Good job, sweet girl.”

She smiled dazedly. “Thanks, Daddy.”

“Want me ta’ take care of ya’ now.” His voice hadn't gotten even slower, slurring from the absolute raw fuck he was having.

She nodded and he helped her off him. She fell back onto her bed, back amongst the mess that was her sheets. Her hair lay above her like a crown and he kissed her lips softly, enjoying this gentle side to her. It seems the more she came the softer she got, more clingy, handsy. He fucking loved it. He was sure his shoulders were covered in scratches from her, and his hair had been tugged about by her. He probably looked just as fucked out as her.

She was covered in a light sheen of sweat, and her lips were swollen. She looked up at him fluttering her lashes. Sexiest little thing ever, a total minx. “Want you.” She whispered. She wanted him to cum, fill her up. She'd been thinking about for years, especially lately.

He grabbed her legs spreading them far apart so he could slot in between her. He was sitting up on his knees all tall above her. Her tummy curled in anticipation and desire, he was so fucking hot. His gorgeous veiny hands touched her and those ring-covered fingers of his gripping into her flesh hard. His swirls of ink were still visible under the moonlight. 

He was a sight. A pure filthy sight she wanted to hold onto in her mind forever.

“Want to fill you up, Princess.” He replied. His cock was begging for his orgasm, he’d managed to last through one of her orgasms pulsing against him, but he knew the next one would push him over the edge. He slowly slipped inside of her, and her hands found their way to his arms, gripping them hard.

He started thrusting roughly without much warning, causing her bed to shift and creak under the weight of them both. She moaned loudly, “Oh, fuck,”

With each thrust her body jolted into the bed, as she tried to find a way to control her squirming body.

He let out a hiss as his balls slapped against her ass. “Feel so good around me, sweet girl. Fuckin' perfect. Made for this cock.”

She pulled him closer so that her chest was pressed into his. His face slipped into the side of her neck and shoulder and gently kissed along there. One of her arms wrapped around his back and the other found his hand, he held hers tightly. He continued fucking into her deep, it felt so good it hurt and her hips jutted to meet his.

“‘Wanna cum, Daddy, can I?” She said softly, in a pleading tone that had his balls aching to fill her pussy up with his hot cum. He grunted pounding into her just that bit harder, this final bundle of energy he had was going toward making her finish.

She felt her tummy tightening familiarly with her orgasm. She knew that she couldn’t hold onto it much longer.

“Cum f’me please, Y/n.” He whimpered, “Be a good girl and let me feel you cum on m’cock.”

His hand held hers tightly, and this romantic intimate side of him was all too much for her, this was somehow hotter than his rough side. She loved to see him like this.

She pulled his face to hers, and they kissed as she finished. It was all teeth and tongue, noses brushing into each other, and she cried out into his mouth. He nibbled her lip and felt her clamping against him rapidly.

When he pulled back from the kiss they were breathless, each thrust had her practically crying out.

“Gonna make me cum, Y/n,” He whispered. “Where do you want me cum?”

She wrapped her legs around his hips. “Inside me, please, Daddy.”

When he made eye contact with her that’s when he finally orgasmed. The thrusts of his hips grew sloppy with pleasure as he let out a loud moan of her name and some curses. She was scratching his arm and back softly letting him fuck her full of his cum as his pleasure subsided. He didn’t move out of her, just landed on top of her. His head resting right above her fast-beating heart. He was fucking spent.

She stroked his hair feeling nice and full of him. She could feel his cum inside her, dripping out onto his cock. He was warm and big to cuddle she loved it. He lifted his head up when he caught his breath, placing a kiss on her forehead, then her nose, then her cheeks which made her giggle, then finally her lips.

“You’re so beautiful.” He whispered.

“Oh, shut up Styles, I already let you fuck me, no need to butter me up now.” She teased.

He rolled his eyes, still inside her, still holding her hand. “You’ve always been beautiful, most gorgeous girl in the whole world.”

Her face turned soft, cheeks blooming in a soft dusty rose. “You’re beautiful too.”

He smiled. “Thank you.”

Eventually, he pulled out of her, she felt empty and whined at the feeling. She was so sensitive now. She honestly wouldn't have minded if he'd stayed inside her for the rest of the night.

She shut her eyes and as he sat back, he watched his cum drip out of her. It made his tummy flutter. He knows he shouldn’t be thinking this far ahead considering Y/n and him weren’t even dating. But if she got pregnant with his baby, that would be the cutest thing in the world. He cut those thoughts from his mind and stood up. 

“Gonna clean y’up.” He said, walking to her bathroom. He found a cloth in there and wet it with some warm water walking over to the bed. 

She opened her eyes which had turned bleary with sleepiness. She smiled tiredly over at him. He smiled back, grabbing her legs and spreading them so he could wipe her down. She whined at the touch of the cloth.

“Sorry, Baby.”

She let out another soft wince. “S’okay, worth it.”

As he stared down at her he noticed how sweaty she looked. “Wanna shower? I’ll help you. We probably should after all that rain and other stuff.”

She nodded, a small laugh leaving her mouth. “Okay, just don’t let me fall asleep and drown in there.”

He laughed. “Course not.”

He helped her up to a sitting position and she looked up at him sluggishly. “Really got me sore, H.”

He frowned. “Sorry, Angel.”

She teasingly sharpened her gaze, “You aren’t sorry, you filthy boy.”

He smirked. “‘M not sorry for taking what’s mine, I am sorry you’ll be sore tomorrow.”

She rolled her eyes. “You will be sorry when I keep complaining.”

"I'll massage you, don't worry."

He picked her up startling her, she always knew he was strong but never expected him to pick her up with such ease, and if she wasn’t totally spent she’d want to test what also he could do with those big muscles. Throw her around maybe? Fuck her standing up? She’d make a note to herself to try that later.

His hands were under bum and as he walked to the bathroom, the shower was surprisingly big and had a tiny little shelve that came out which had all her soaps and shampoos, but there was enough room for her to sit on it.

He turned the water on warm and placed her onto the sink bench. She watched him under the pale light of the bathroom. How was this the same Harry from before?

This was a soft kind man, a gentleman, hardly a frat boy dick. She didn't know where'd he been hiding this side of him. But she liked him just as much as he did the rotten-mouthed boy she knew.

In the shower he took care of her as promised, washing her hair with the lavender-scented shampoo she owned. He used some too, and he helped wash her skin with this fresh-smelling shower oil she had. Softly cleaning her sore parts and he massaged her body with such a gentleness that she melted right into his hands.

She’d never expected Harry to be one to stay and cuddle after, let alone help shower. He was so nurturing to her. It made her feelings bloom and spread through her body like wildflowers.

When they were both clean Harry even helped her dry her hair, and change into some comfy clothes. While she was brushing her teeth and putting some skincare on he fixed up her sheets and tucked himself into them. He'd put his rings in the little dish she had on her bedside table. Checking his phone to see it was late. They'd been going for a while.

When she came out in a baggy shirt that Harry had worn last time he was here, it still smelt of him, and some little black knickers he felt his heart skip a beat. She looked especially good in his clothes.

“C’mere.” He opened the duvet and she slid in beside him tiredly. He pulled her close, right in the crook of his chest, he’d decided to wear nothing to bed. Which bothered neither of them. He ran hot, especially with Y/n snuggling right up against him.

Her window was open letting the heavy downpour of thunder and rain become background noise as they fell asleep. He kissed her temple, rubbing her back underneath his shirt.

“Night, Beautiful.”

She shut her eyes kissing one of the swallows on his chest. “Night, Styles.”

Sleep found them both quickly and Harry held onto her the whole night. He was completely smitten with her, the one girl he couldn’t have was the only one he wanted. Fuck. They were so screwed.

PART THREE???????

[audreyscribes]

Do you think that maybe you could post head canons for children of Ganymede? Like would they be on Zeus' or Hera's bad side? Would they sorta look like children of Aphrodite, because of Ganymede's famous beauty? Or how they would be treated at camp? Pretty pleaseeeeeeee!

A/N: Fitting how this ask came in just in time for Pride Month and Ganymede is not only the Cupbearer of the Gods, but also a god of Homosexual Love and Desire (well at least stated clearly in the PJO Books), a symbol for beautiful young male who attracted homosexual desire and love. I’ll try to give it a shot but it’ll be sort of short. Hopefully it’s alright and thanks for stopping by!! I hope you have a nice day!  [edit: 6/11/2025: minor editing]

Considering it has been implied that male gods can have demigods with male mortals, example shown in the books, in the Trial of Apollo series, with Kayla Knowles; her fathers being Apollo and Darren Knowles, a male Canadian Archery instructor. So it's not impossible to say that Ganymede, being a symbol of homosexual love, would have a demigod child with a mortal man. (Now I’m thinking whether to say female gods can have children with female mortals has not been implied but if the male gods can, I guess female gods can too? Don’t ask me the logistics for this please; my gray-asexual brain can’t think on it properly).

Considering Ganymede has been said to be the most beautiful out of the gods, with the exception being Aphrodite, it’s sufficient to say they would give off the allure much like a child of Aphrodite. Their domains are in the same realm so there’s also that. There would be a difference but how much and how big they are, depends.

As for being on either Zeus’ or Hera’s bad side….oof, I’m not sure if its either or, but I can see it leaning more towards Zeus in terms of displeasure

I can see a child of Ganymede being on Zeus’ bad side because Zeus was the one who abducted Ganymede, which has been alluded to with the Eagle or it was Zeus’ himself doing the deed, and it can be safe to say that Zeus is possessive of Ganymede, so for him to go fall in love with a mortal man and have a child, I can see Zeus being jealous and taking his anger out on the demigod. Funny to think about since for Zeus, it’d probably be the first time (in a while) to feel like watching his ‘lover’ go and have children with someone else, putting him in the same position as Hera has been multiple times. In this case, I see the child of Ganymede being favourable by Hera, solely because she can feel smug and Zeus gets a taste of his own medicine of what infidelity is like.

If the Ganymede demigod were to be on Hera’s bad side, also, it may be just solely be jealously that is directed at Ganymede towards you; since towards other gods, other gods can’t deal direct damage or something to each other, (except for great minor inconveniences) so having a demigod to be able to direct her ire towards would be it. But what I said in the other point probably weighs more than this; so you have to hope that Zeus is actually very angry and bothered by the Ganymede demigod's existence to avoid Hera’s bad mood.

In terms of Camp, I’d feel like people would look at the child of Ganymede with confusion, suspicion, and worry because everyone knows about Ganymede and his story, so they’re just going to wonder if they’ll suffer any consequence by being around them. There may be some reactions being born from Ganymede and a mortal man, but considering Kayla exists already in the books, it's just a thing people who didn’t know, learn is a thing and move on. More so that is possible then the idea of it.

Otherwise, the child of Ganymede would be treated as another demigod, a representation of Ganymede’s godly realm and so forth. They probably are looked at with the perspective of a child of Aphrodite, but specifically homosexual love and stuff like that. Any charm speaking skills if there are any, only work (more) on the same gender as themselves, etc.

Probably an irrational fear or distaste of Eagles cause well… *looks at how Ganymede was abducted by Eagles* Yeah.

[sosoribro]

rouxls kaard and the theme of freedom: just trust me bro

now listen. i know rouxls is just the funny blue idiot man with the confusing-to-pronounce name and the funny duck, and its likely that he'll just remain the silly comic-relief guy for the whole game. and honestly i love that. i think that would be really funny.

(YAP SESH INCOMING)

HOWEVER

freedom. lets talk about freedom. you know, that reoccuring concept we all know and love. freedom. choice. one's own autonomy.

now lets look at rouxls again. what is he? the rules card. whats a point that comes up time and time again when discussing this character? in a deck of cards, the rules card has almost no significance whatsoever, and exists for just that: the rules. as a result, it is often discarded. it is considered useless.

but look at how rouxls views himself, and look at how he carries himself. it is so easy to say that he thinks he's better than everyone, and that he truly is nothing but a stuck-up, vain man who's too stupid to even see that he's well... stupid.

or is he? (legitimate question!!! here's a potential answer????)

because he seems fixated on working for someone. anyone, it seems. so here we have someone who considers himself to be absolutely intelligent, capable, powerful, and just generally better than everyone else, yet still wants to settle for second-in-command? he contradicts himself. but why?

so back to the card thing. the rules card is ultimately in a deck to help.

and rouxls kaard seems desperate to help. to assist. to serve. but that makes sense, considering that as the rules card, that is his purpose.

and what if he knew that?

so this is the part where i realize that im way too invested in this character and will really take ANYTHING as evidence for my probably-not-canon lore that's canon in my mind and only in my mind. stop reading right now if you dont like that.

anyway

rouxls lists long walks in the dungeon as one of his hobbies.

and who's in the dungeon?

THATS RIGHT. I AM BRINING THIS GUY UP:

YOU KNOW HIM, YOU LOVE HIM, ITS JEVIL YEAH I EVEN DRAGGED JEVIL INTO THIS SO YOU KNOW IM IN TOO DEEP

so anyway ignoring how far-fetched this is what if hypothetically rouxls wandered down to jevil's cell and somehow learned that it was all just a game yada yada yada and in the process, learned that providing rules and helping until he is inevitably discarded is simply his role.

and so, his personality is as stuck-up and high-and-mighty as it is because he wants to feel important. he needs to feel important, otherwise he'll be thrown away.

he needs to be of use to someone, but can not stand going ignored.

in being so willing to submit to whoever's in power, he denies himself freedom.

so long story short: hey guys what if rouxls actually knows hes useless and mostly discarded. how does he know? idk jevil maybe told him??? but maybe thats why hes so desperate to work for someone, but is so full of himself at the same time? because he wants to feel needed and important, because he knows that the rules card gets thrown away. again, jevil probably told him iunno

and thats how rouxls totally links to the theme of freedom guys totally a billion percent canon i am definitely so normal about him

NOW ALTERNATIVELY HE COULD ALSO JUST BE FUNNY STUPID MAN I DUNNO

[hoiststowline]

I literally was just reading that comic with Blades and Aid lol, I love them

Imagine being the protectobot base human liaison, if you will. Working alongside them in a world where maybe humans and bots have come to co exist over the years like some of the shows

Spending time organizing files and doing admin work with Hot Spot (both getting lectured by Aid to take breaks if they’ve been overworking, but it’s lighthearted, he just cares) Spots appreciates the company while working, and enjoys the earth music you play and hum, engaging in conversation about your lives prior to this hot mess you’ve come to love. I think he’d be reserved about his life before, but getting to know him better and spending time with him causes his outer shell to crack

But also living at base with them, would be so. much. fun. Imagine bringing all kinds of human entertainment and trying to help these probably very traumatized mechs live a bit more like how they’re used to. Or at least a bit easier

Was reading your monopoly moment with Rook, Groove and Blades and can’t stop thinking about what other human entertainment they would like. Uno gets banned so fast, don’t even BRING Mario kart into this base, lmao. I think Spots or Streets being uncharacteristically bad at at DRIVING game would be hilarious

Blades laughing his ass off for once, like he ever drives. Groove and Rook absolutely losing it at how unrealistic it is. “That’s not how drifting works!” Spots is happy to see everyone let loose for the first time in? how many cycles has it been? These human games might be magic.

Humor me, I hc that soft things are considered a huge luxury on Cybertron normally, let alone during the war, so when you bring them a bunch of big blankets you’d just bought, freshly washed and smelling comfortingly like the person they’ve grown so familiar with? You’ve got bots wrapped around your finger. (Platonic or otherwise, however you wanna interpret is fine with me:)

Even knowing they can’t use human food the same way and still require energon, I personally hc they’d at least try some human foods for the flavor and camaraderie of enjoying meals together. They’d caught you cooking/baking for them, just cause you wanted to share something nice with them? It’s over

You make something for someone’s individual taste, maybe for what your human culture would call a ‘birthday’ (though it got lost in translation the first time you brought it up, lol, “Berth day? What does that even-?”) their spark is melting, so flattered and happy you’d gone out of your way to share a custom with them AND put in effort to make them something? Knows you can’t make energon goodies like they’re used to due to its radioactivity, but you still found something they like and made it- I’m crying

Explaining human culture to the bots. The first time you reference a meme they’re looking at you confused, Groove starts laughing and now you’re stuck explaining the joke to everyone, lmao

Great I have fic ideas now YIPEEE

so so so good omg !! loving every moment of this.

it is a good issue & good interaction between the two of them!

they definitely become attached very, very quickly. because having someone who is wiling to help and has compassion is a drastic change from the dynamics they’re accustomed to (at least in a stranded-type scenario). it wouldn’t take very long for the reader to have them all wrapped around their finger, haha.

it’d be funny because they don’t realize you’re learning stuff just as much as they are. you have no idea what anything is that they actually need, but whatever you have access to/are in possession of is welcome to them. your sleep schedule?? wdym you have to sleep for eight hours every day? and on the other hand, they can go much longer without having to rest.

Groove hangs on every word you say about anything regarding your culture. Blades listens too, but pretends that he doesn’t care because he doesn’t want to sit through the teasing from Groove about it. he likes listening to you explain things, and sometimes you’re graced with his explanation of how Cybertronians would do it.

for sure would have a lot of explaining to do at first, in any situation. lots of confused looks and “huhs”. any jokes really fly right over their heads, sometimes sarcasm too.

I love these!! so much fun to read, I love it!! thank you always for letting me yap ab these guys!!!

yay! for your fic ideas, tag me or lmk! 🫶 i'd love to read it if you post!!

[ultimateloserboy]

ok you know what im gonna say it with my full chest. literally nobody talks about bendy (the character) like who he actually is and ive been tired of it since the old game ended. i think hes genuinely one of the most incorrectly fanonized characters like ever at this point. and i genuinely believe it changed the actual canon and it bothers me a lot.

as for the physical version of him/ the ink demon— in the original batim game there was literally a whole plot point about bendy being non-human and how he came out of the machine physically and mentally sloppy compared to the other creations. hes not a fully fledged-out person and that’s LITERALLY an entire section of the original game. he has no human soul or mind, hes sentient but about as much as a gorilla. he attacks like a zombie or an animal with instinct and not like an angry human being. he cant speak because his mouth is fake and he cant walk properly because his limbs are liquid sludge— hes literally an abomination— a mockery of actual human life. its crazy to even call him the “villain” of the story because he doesnt have the thinking ability to genuinely be malicious. its like calling zombies the villains of zombie movies, they cant be because they dont have the brain function to be.

a lot of people ignored the obvious fact that he isnt human-like so they could sexualize him, which isnt as bad as sexualizing an actual animal— im not claiming that— but what bothers me is how the creators made him MORE HUMAN to lean towards these people and ill never think otherwise. yall can argue with me or call me chronically online, but bendy WASNT able to speak or was human-like at all until the dark revival, which was so obviously fan service its not even funny.

im not claiming that people who sexualize bendy are zoos or something— thats too far. what im claiming tho is that this genuinely interesting character was given consciousness and the ability to speak after previously not ever having those things JUST so booktok ass teenagers could swoon over him like they do venom, taking away the interest of his original character. he wasnt fully sentient until it made money for the creators and then suddenly hes speaking poetry in a deep sexy man voice with a fucking 8 pack. how does that not bother anyone? im not even trying to say its morally weird— im just saying its bad writing in general!!! like why do yall let these games ruin characters for fan service and not even give a fuck, and then have the balls to ask why newer ones are so poorly written?? no fucking shot EVERY one of yall was ok with them retconning his entire existence like HES THE MAIN CHARACTER???? DO YALL REALLY WANNA SEXUALIZE EVERYTHING //THAT// BAD TO THE POINT ITS OK TO REWRITE THE ENTIRE MAIN CHARACTER AS LONG AS IT MEANS YOU CAN FINALLY SEXUALIZE HIM CANONICALLY??????

and before people say anything— no i dont think its wrong for bendy to develop a voice or to become more human over time— BUT COME ON DUDE ARE YALL DENSE?? IVE SEEN LESS FAN-SERVICE STARING AT MY GOD DAMN AIR CONDITIONER!!!! they didnt “develop” bendy more— they retconned him to please freaks online!!! surely ONE of yall had to have noticed like… when tdr dropped the sexualization was so bad i genuinely didnt have fun with the series anymore. and I CANT because its justified now! the creators retconned him to be more sexyman so now you cant even argue against it!! literally why cant we have ONE thing online without people wanting to pound every single fucking character??

im sorry if this sounds mean but ive been upset about this for YEARS!! bendy was my favorite character as a kid and NOBODY gives him justice NOT EVEN HIS OWN CREATORS. it would be one thing if there was just a small portion that treated him like this but now its literally everyone and the games lean into it and i just want to explode and die at this point fr.

it genuinely makes me a little ill knowing he was once just a confused, soulless being fighting and killing out of the confusion, rage and fear that his cruel existence caused him to feel, but now hes just a deep voiced venom-ripoff villain whose just a big meanie and hunts you for sport or some stupid shit.

[annabthesolitarywriter]

The Lost Tale of the Red Book - The Martyred Mother

This is a temporary title for the rewrite of my current WIP The Lady of Ithilien (posted on AO3).

The decision to rewrite the story comes after a lot of thought and after realizing that I have created too many OCs who would have otherwise no space in the current narrative. The moodboard in this post is supposed to represent the themes of the rewrite, the main ones being sadness, love, motherhood, fighting and death.

They honestly haven't really changed that much. They haven't changed at all, actually. The story was supposed to be borderline tragic from the early days of its conception and it will be so in the rewrite as well. Be prepared for a lot of angst and despair with lighthearted, funny and loving moments throughout.

Info dump (Warning for some! spoilers)

If you have read the chapters of the original story which are already posted on AO3, you will already know that the main character is Elenna "Enna" Tindómiel, the (adopted) eldest child of Faramir and Éowyn.

Fancasts for "Enna": Anais Tinguely (toddler); Billie Gadsdon (childhood until 10); Nehir Ada Trabzon (10-12); Mackenzie Foy (teenage years; roughly 13-19); Synnøve Karlsen (20 years old-her death)

She is what one would call a perfect lady and is betrothed to Crown Prince Eldarion as an infant. Due to Eldarion's...troubled personality, the marriage doesn't last and she later marries Elphirion—heir apparent to Lebennin—and then Eönwë. Oh, and there a little storyline with Mairon/Sauron coming back, which will affect her whole life. No big deal, really.

Changes from the original story

Although most of what I've already written is indeed canonical in my universe, I've recently thought of some changes which I think work slightly better. I will jot any new changes here so that I have everything in one single post.

Her whole arc is about persevering through tragedy and trying to grow as a person, which isn't really easy for her.

She's still the old "Enna" in many ways, she just tries more. She still apologizes at every turn, she still does not understand why Eönwë loves her, but instead of questioning his motives, she just learns to accept that she loves him. She may question them when they're courting, but she does show growth. She eventually relapses into her old ways (her teenage phase) after her children die. She loses hope and has to be persuaded to keep going.

Child and pre-teen: completely and fully innocent and confused. This is, of course, generally speaking. Ioreth starts filling her head with ideas of pomp and grandeur and she becomes a bit entitled, although Faramir, Éowyn and Boromir try to lessen Ioreth's influence on her. Will they succeed? I certainly hope so.

Teenage years: era of abuse, assault, trauma and meltdowns ("original" Enna) with a beginning of character development, but only a little.

Late teenage years: she becomes a bit more confident and dedicates most of her time to being a mom (she loves her children)

Adulthood: extreme trauma comes again (child loss), devotes most of her time to charity and helping others, has new laws enacted, tries to make the world a better place, her peace of mind is fully broken.

MAIN PERSONALITY TRAITS: deeply insecure, very little (nearly non-existent) self-esteem, needs to be reassured, kind, a bit impulsive on occasion, but extremely good at heart. One of the kindest people. She sympathizes and cares for all those who suffer. She's VERY STUBBORN, but not unreasonable.

~*~

I've never spoken about it openly, so it's not actually much of a change, but I think her relationship with her mom (Éowyn) is complicated since childhood. Ioreth tells her she is not worth loving and that she shouldn't even bother acknowledging or listening to her. Faramir says the exact opposite. I suppose forgetting about her and choosing to distance herself from Rohan is a natural consequence of that. Elboron resents her because she "left him" and may have learned that from his beloved older sister he loves so much. He has a mind of his own, but he may have internalized that by copying his sister. As an adult, Enna will learn to embrace her Rohan side against (somehow, maybe) because of Princess Idis, whom she helps and corresponds with. Yes, I made up my mind and Idis lives in the rewrite. She exists. She's very secluded and doesn't appear much, but she's alive.

Although the events of chapter 1 do unfold in the same way, Enna does not meet Eönwë in person until FoA 22. He still saves her in FoA 15 when Mairon/Sauron tries to kill her, but she has no idea it is him. She only sees a white, bright light and (maybe) hears his voice. But that's it. I had thought of a very cute scene of Elboron and Eönwë meeting when he's like three or four with Eönwë shape-shifting into an eagle and "taking him to fly" so maybe he meets Elboron not knowing he's related to Enna and that's Elboron that, years later, has them meet. Mmm... that's definitely something to think about. He might also meet several members of the Fellowship.

Maybe they meet in passing and have a few conversations, but it doesn't go past that.

She still insists on marrying Eldarion to gain power to survive but begs Aragorn to speed up to process once she's assaulted by Duinnín, the son of Duinhir of the Blackroot Vale (the same guy who later r*pes one of her daughters and is executed by Eönwë). She tells Aragorn about it but doesn't mention his name (if there's something which hasn't changed is her willingness to protect those who harm her both because it could create scandal, but also because she believes they can be redeemed).

I don't really know when the assault part will take place, but it will happen. Let's see what I come up with.

She is extremely traumatized by the Mairon accident but since no one knows about it (unlike in the original), everybody assumes she just lost her mind. She cannot speak of it and bottles everything up. Rumors go around and her mental health goes down the drain. Some people swear that they saw something and obviously the members of the Fellowship believe her. A few weeks later Duinnín assaults her, having heard others that she's easy. By then only Maira sort of knows what she's been through and Enna has full meltdowns. She'll start getting better thanks to her Uncle Boromir the following year.

She still very much has her haughty, condescending moments but she realizes that she's in the wrong and feels extreme guilt about it (she cries, for instance, after raising her voice at people). Her inability to control her emotions (i.e. screaming and crying in a timespan of a legit second) is also due to her "post-Mairon medications"

She also has hallucinations of "a very pretty lady who talks to me" aka her conscience.

She sucks at comforting people. She means well, but...yep. She can't do it.

She actually loves Elphirion. Elendil (OC; Aragorn and Arwen's second son) arranges their marriage (he and Elphirion are childhood friends) and, if in the original story Enna was supposed to be indifferent towards him, she isn't in the rewrite. She loves him (in a friendly way) and they have a good marriage until he dies. The only problem is that Elphirion is constantly sick and Enna still cries a lot.

She is extremely scared of Elphirion at first and doesn't want him to touch her (she starts shaking and trembling when she sees him), but ultimately decides to trust him. She may not love him romantically, but there's that.

Eönwë is her third husband and she has sixteen children by him (counting miscarriages and stillbirths). She also struggles to trust him at first, but she eventually falls deeply in love (he falls first, I think)

She is still concerned about her husbands taking mistresses and sort of accepts the possibility even with Elphirion and Eönwë. She only asks that they are honest about it and not like (teen) Eldarion.

She was originally supposed to favor her boys over her girls, but she really doesn't in the rewrite. She is an all-around amazing mother. She may still be awkward around her girls from time to time, but she loves them wholeheartedly and wants to protect them so they don't suffer as much as she did. She is a truly great mom, but she doesn't think she is and that leads her down a path of...unhappy choices. But she is there for her children when they need her and if she is hesitant it is only because she feels unworthy of their love, not because she wants to avoid them or because she doesn't love. Her children sense that and they will actually have conversations about it. It may take a while (depending what direction the rewrite takes), but they will have those conversations sooner than later. All the snippets where she is hesitant are still valid, but they are to be looked at in a wider context and they will be integrated in a more positive narrative. We'll see how it goes from there. They will still have some disagreements, but I'll try to balance everything out a bit more. As much as I love angst—and, believe me, I do—I feel like it might get repetitive very quickly.

She does have the "Wyn trauma", but it's more due to the fact that she's afraid she's going to turn out like her rather than spite. She's hesitant to build a relationship with her, but she soon feels ashamed about it and, with her oldest children and Eönwë's support, she manages to be a loving mom to her nevertheless. The "favorite child" thing is more of a running joke rather than a factual thing. She may be closer to some of the kids (it's normal in large families, I think), but she loves them all unconditionally.

She still refers to her unborn children as sons sometimes, especially during her pregnancy with Elendur even she's a scared fourteen-year old who knows that only having a son may help her survive. She may even secretly tell Maira (=her maid, bestie and confidante) and Uncle Boromir. It may take a lot of persuasion, but she may eventually admit that, deep down, she wouldn't really care about the baby's gender if it were up to her. It's all Ioreth and society.

Boromir's role in all of this is expanded and he is the one who immediately sees through her façade in situations such as this one and, when she acts stubborn about it, he encourages her to be honest with him and to, essentially, drop the act. More on this in the Boromir Week stuff.

Even during her teenage years, she is much closer to Boromir than Faramir and keeps her father at distance (both not to have him worry about what happens to her and because she feels more comfortable opening up to her uncle since Faramir can't help but see her as a child).

She intends to keep the people she loves away to protect them (especially after Mairon tells her that all her loved ones will die), but Boromir (or maybe Elendil) try to convince her that if they must die, they'll die anyway. That gives her a lot to think about.

Speaking of children, Elendur (her first child and her first with Eldarion) doesn't die at birth. He dies some fourteen years later in a very stupid accident. Although Eldarion was horrible to her, Enna lies to her son about what happened to her so that Elendur can have a good relationship with dad (surprisingly Eldarion tries to be a good father and turns out to be a fairly decent person when he is sober and not controlled by some *hideous tutor*

In spite of Ioreth's abuse and constant nagging, she is extremely innocent as a child. She is still a bit haughty as a teenager, but her façade crumbles quite quickly (especially around people who know her and read her like the back of their hand) and readily admits it is her own coping mechanism to survive. She doesn't like doing it, but she's forced to do it.

As she grows older and is affected by tragedy, she falls back into her childish innocence (as a comfort and coping mechanism) and this trait of hers is exploited by traitors and people who wish her harm (i.e. the redhead as well as others). Her mental barriers are also affected by the personification of her conscience (she may do dangerous things she does not remember because of it, but she mostly cries into her pillow and tries to atone by helping others).

She also no longer values protocol as much. It was her everything as a teenager because it gave her a sense of purpose and a sense of self, but when she gets truly powerful, she no longer values it as much. She appreciates it when people observe it, but she's more relaxed about it. She's obsessed with the Maiarin salute though and would like for people to observe that.

She also becomes more accepting and open to the idea of women remaining unmarried. In the rewrite, she's no longer stuck in her ways, but actually shows growth more plainly and is more prone to listening to others. She is still very stubborn and defends her ideas, but she is a little less stubborn, I suppose.

She also tries to ask for help if she's sick (especially when she's pregnant—it will happen a lot). It will still very hard for her and she'll still feel very guilty about it, but the first step is what matters, right? She will probably try and communicate non-verbally (through her facial expressions, eyes etc), but she tries. It's a gradual process and she has to be coaxed into it, but she tries.

She has plenty of relapses where she thinks everything is her fault though.

The things she cannot/feels too ashamed to talk about she keeps in her diaries, which will be published after her death. Even though she's more open about her struggles, she still won't tell people everything (no one does) and many things will come to light after her death.

Elendil may not die after all. I have come up with an idea of Eldarion saving him last minute and that could possibly be the start of the two brothers mending their broken relationship. But we'll see.

I will be including facts and things I've spoken of in fandom events and one-shots as well.

As I mentioned, this post is ongoing and I will link my OC fancasts here once the character profiles are all complete (hopefully by the end of the year)

I will also link other moodboards For instance, I have here one of the Faramir and Éowyn's home in Emyn Arnen (Enna's childhood home)

This is how I picture Faramir's palace. The main reference is Palazzo Vecchio in Florence, Italy, but I will also take inspiration from other Florentine palaces. I honestly don't know wether their palace will need to be rebuilt as well. In that case, I think Aragorn will give them another place in which to stay in Minas Tirith. That place could be very well inspired by Villa Medici (Rome, Italy)

It was built in white stone (much like all of Minas Tirith) and it has a garden. Éowyn said she wanted to garden so I suppose Aragorn makes her happy.

Enna will leave her childhood home (wether it is Palazzo Vecchio or Villa Medici is still to be decided, but I think it will be Palazzo Vecchio by then) in roughly FoA 13/14 to move to Minas Tirith full time. She will also live in Minas Tirith (or maybe Anórien or Dol Amroth or even Lindon - see, this is why this post is ongoing) while Faramir's old seat at Emyn Arnen is refurbished and made a lot bigger. The new and improved Emyn Arnen (which will become Enna and Eönwë's main residence) is inspired by Topkapi Palace in Istanbul (although some elements from various Medici palaces will remain. Palazzo Vecchio will essentially be expanded to make room for a lot of Maiar and new training guilds will also be built).

Before & After

The columns remain but the general architecture of the place changes a little bit. Some elements do stay the same (fountains and other things).

You know what? I think Enna and Eönwë's "middle" residence (the one they live in while Emyn Arnen is being renovated) might, after all, be in the region of Anórien, of which Boromir is Prince in my AUs. Eönwë and Boromir have a great relationship (you will get a glimpse of it in my One-shot for day 6 of Boromir Week 2025) and I thought it would be cool for Enna to be neighbors with her uncle. Mírion and the other early children from their marriage could very well be born in Anórien/Osgiliath. That would make me very happy. Elenwë need a place to stay and, since Faramir doesn't really like his son-in-law, I doubt Enna would want to return to Ithilien before her new home is ready and her dad is out. Imrahil will definitely try and persuade her to move in a palace close to his, but I doubt that will happen either. And Eönwë certainly wants to avoid Minas Tirith because of Eldarion and other personal reasons. So I think that, logistically, Anórien could be the only suitable place within the Gondorian borders. They could move to Arnor but...it's probably too far. They might have a vacation home there though. So...I guess...Anórien it is! Boromir will be very happy about it. It will be a bit awkward at first, but maybe Enna will reconcile with her cousins earlier than previously planned, and they'll actually get to have a relationship like a normal family? Why am I feeling so merciful today? I hope I won't regret it later. Don't get overexcited though and don't get too hopeful either. The themes in the main moodboard are still valid and she will still suffer greatly. It's the point of her story. She just will probably no longer have to suffer alone and will be more inclined to confide in her family members, especially Boromir and fam. They sort of stop speaking for a few years, but they get on well again once Enna is free of Eldarion, doing better mentally and married to Eönwë, who encourages her to apologize to Uncle Boromir and to mend whatever rift she had with her cousin(s). Again, why am I being so reasonable? So merciful? It's not in my nature. Maybe I should see a doctor.

I honestly think she will genuinely try to speak about her problems—only when prodded about it though—and their relatives will try and encourage her to open up. The change is that, instead of assuming right away that they want nothing to do with her, she will try to open up before her inner voices prompt her to start pushing everybody away because she feels like a burden. But the main difference between the original and the rewrite is that she will make the effort. At Eönwë's explicit request probably, but she will try.

Since I have mentioned Imrahil in my previous point, I just would like to say that Enna and Eönwë do have their official vacation spot in Dol Amroth. Enna's health is not great (to put it mildly) and she often goes to Dol Amroth in the hopes of getting better (y'know, the warmer climate and such). Their residence in Dol Amroth is based on the Miramare Castle in Trieste, Italy

Enna is friends with Erchirion and Amrothos and is godmother to the the young lady Erchirion and Iorlas adopt. She'll be spending a lot of time with her and will see a lot of Erchirion (and Iorlas). They're a couple (the idea, as far as I know, is originally by @lucifers-legions,so she gets the credit for bringing them together).

Enna will also be vital in ensuring that she gets legally recognized as their daughter and heir (while, at first she is against female succession, she changes her mind later on. It's all part of her character development. At the beginning she is purely against it because...it's against the law. She is not opposed to women ruling per sé, but the law states otherwise so that's her line of thought. She follows the law to a t and doing something which contradicts the WRITTEN LAW is outrageous to her. No spoilers, but you'll get a taste of it in my One-shot for day 7 of this year's Boromir Week).

Her interacting with Imrahil's sons is a change of plans, since I had previously thought she would have no interaction with Imrahil's boys whatsoever. Things do change quite fast, apparently.

I am almost fully set on Château De Chenonceau as Elenwë's residence in their early years of marriage.

Enna loves flowers (roses, lilies and tulips especially) so she'll have a field day in a garden such as this one. Château De Chenonceau for the win? I came across some wonderful Irish castles as well, so I might pick one of those as well. All castles are so pretty.

I wonder what (my) Ioreth will do now that both Boromir AND Eönwë would could potentially kick her out if she oversteps the line. Unless Ioreth only comes back when the revamping of Emyn Arnen is complete and Boromir is longer there to help protect her. See why this post will need further updates!?

I haven't really thought about it that much, but I could see Boromir living in a palace similar to a Medicean one (Sean Bean was in Medici so it would make sense. Nice touch there), but also in a French palace like Versailles or one of the Loire Castles. The Archbishop's Palace of Alcalá De Henares could also be a good reference. I feel like eventually it will be up to his wife 🤣 I'll update this post once again when I have Idhrildin's personality figured out and I have her choose her own house. Boromir is an army man, everything sounds good to him and I headcanon he's not really helpful when dealing with this kind of stuff.

I do like the idea of Boromir and Eönwë being neighbors though so I guess I'll just google whatever Loire Castle is closest to Château de Chenonceau and then add elements of Idhrildin's personality to it. Lis also helps with decorating so I guess she'll have a say in it, too.

Based on a quick Google search three Loire Castles that can be visited on the same day are Chenonceau, Cheverny and Chambord. So, I guess Boromir will get either Cheverny or Chambord? Boromir doesn't strike me as someone who likes opulent things and Cheverny seems to me a little smaller compared to Chambord. But then again, Boromir is the literal Prince of the fief so...if he doesn't live in a grand house, who does? Maybe Chambord is the Osgiliath place and Cheverny the Anórien one? Chambord is the main residence and Cheverny is his wedding gift to Idhrildin which is later turned into headquarters for her charities? Idhrildin, please a decision. You pick otherwise I'll just let you have both castles.

More to follow! (I'll update this post in the following weeks and months until I start working on the rewrite later in the year). I'll update it with several other moodboards and details (and possibly a new title). Other title ideas I've come up with for the rewrite are: A Golden Era, The Golden Era, The Forgotten Tale Of The Fourth Age and A Brief Golden Moment.

I personally think the one I put at the top of the post is still my strongest option, but we'll see. Being a mother is a major part of Enna's identity (she loves having children and loves being a mom) and she's a martyr because...she goes through a lot of things. I think it fits. Mother is also a title to her. Her children call her Valide, which does indeed mean Mother in the Valarin tongue (I am basing it off Turkish) and one of the many titles she is bestowed upon once she marries Eönwë is the title of Validem (=my Valide). That's a title that belongs to Varda as well and that's what the Maiar call her. Just like Varda, she is everyone's mother now. So, Validem is the title and Valide is Mother or Mom.

Please, don't forget to send in more fic requests so that I can develop these points and get the hang of them before I actually start the rewrite! I feel like there's nothing worse than setting one's mind onto a new course and then falling back into old habits. Send in anything! Especially Dol Amroth content (yes, I'm currently obsessed with Dol Amroth and I feel like my obsession won't be subsiding anytime soon. Not going to lie a fic with Enna and Erchirion and maybe even Iorlas would be great. I came up with this thing that they're close and now I need to develop it. I might even introduce their daughter 🫢 she might be Erchirion's daughter and then Iorlas adopts her.

Plot twist: Elendil survives his assassination attempt and Erchiriorlas' daughter (her name is Ellerian) marries him.

Maybe they don't get married because he dies anyway, but they have a brief romance. He may pull an Aragorn because he feels guilty of something or he feels like he's betraying Enna or whatever.

About Erchiriorlas...family drama in Dol Amroth or should I just have them conduct a secret affair and they become public after Imrahil dies? Or Erchirion doesn't really care what his dad thinks and does what he wants? It'd be a first in my writing. Erchirion is not Imrahil's heir anyway, so I suppose he's sort of allowed to do whatever he wants? Ugh. Decisions, decisions, decisions.

And don't forget to dm me or send asks if you want to know more (also, about the asks in my box...I'll try to answer them all by the end of the year.

[rocket-enjoyer]

Quick Astropolitics Rundown: The Asteroid Belt Federation

The Asteroid Belt Federation. Certainly one of the more interesting powers in the solar system. Simultaneously a combined effort for both security, prosperity and power, yet divided in many, many aspects.

Alright, let's start off with

History:

I'll try to keep this section brief. The asteroid belt was colonized by martian conglomerates for mining metals, fissiles and volatiles. At the beginning of the Martian Civil War (Mind you, never call it that if you are anywhere near someone from the Belt; they will proceed to kick your ass. Just call it the revolution or anti-conglomerate war.) the asteroids' leadership were quickly overthrown without much trouble. People from different asteroids had entirely different views on what socialism or communism or whatever actually is and how it's achieved, however, which led to different asteroid families (at the time not capitalized) being run entirely differently. Every attempt from the conglomerates to take back asteroids failed. Firstly their constellations were not armed and armored for the task at hand: some invasions were entirely prevented through creative application of mass drivers, while others ended in the discovery that troops trained mostly for intimidating workers and shooting unarmed people had not signed up to be the ones being shot at. In the belt, the formation of the Martian Republic was seen as a loss, not a victory or an end to pointless fighting. After communication between asteroid families was set up, the Federation was set up in 2141.

Politics:

For all of its existence, the politics of the Asteroid Belt Federation has been a total mess. The Families of the asteroid belt are entirely different in internal politics, perspectives and needs, and the interactions between them and federal decisions are fascinating to watch. Here's some notable Families:

Ceres: the crown jewel of the Federation. It has the largest economy and population of any Family and the most political weight when it comes to federal stuff. Their perspective is often very different and more liberal to that of other Families, which makes them relatively hated - people often joke about them vetoing or otherwise single-handedly taking down proposals other Families are unanimous about. Though, at least as an outsider, I consider this actually beneficial to the Federation. Their politicians seem far more competent than the other Families' and they have not yet succumbed to populism or dictatorship even once. Perhaps this is by miracle, but by now I think it's not a coincidence.

Vesta, the jealous little sister of Ceres. Second at everything, from the size of their economy to upholding of democratic values. By now they're practically entirely controlled by a single family. Of people. I know, it's a little confusing. That dynasty has crumbled their economy and led to little development in a while, but through sheer industry and export they are still very significant. There are lots of good, competent people working between the cracks of their broken system, helping people and overall making everything work. If they all somehow organized, they could overthrow the leadership, but it seems they think that's somehow impossible. My best wishes to Vesta. I'm sure they'll climb out of this rut eventually.

Eos has a significant spy and information warfare network across the entire Federation and even the rest of the solar system. They clearly think of themselves as the OO of the Asteroid Belt Federation, but really, they aren't all that impressive. Or, at least, the other Families seem to think so. I suppose it gives them lots of jobs that aren't just mining. They're under a one-party system, but it's kind of funny to watch their incompetence.

Hilda is a particularly pacifistic Family that often just slows down military discussion, which has caused some frustration since the JMR invasion of the Trojans. They're a direct democracy.

There's a bunch more, like the Trojans and Greeks, poor old ignored Koronis, universally loved Schubart, but we're out of time here.

Since the Federation's decisions are made on multiple levels, with the most important parts done by councils filled with people from the politics of different Families, every Family is very important to the entire Asteroid Belt Federation. Big decisions also therefore take very long times to make, except in urgent situations where the High Federal Council, formed of only a few people, can take full control.

Astropolitics:

Currently, the Asteroid Belt Federation is in a particularly strange spot. They, especially the Trojans and Greeks, previously allied with the JMR due to the JMR's fairly stable democracy, need for metals, large economy and commitment to non-capitalist economics. However, with the 2270 sweep election of the Jovian Might Party and subsequent invasion of the Trojans, the Federation has entirely turned against the JMR and their main trading partners are now Earth nations and Mars - something previously considered entirely ridiculous due to their capitalist economies.

Ever since the end of the Martian Civil War, they've had problems with the Martian Republic mining uninhabited asteroids in the asteroid belt. With their recent increase in eagerness to sell Mars metals, they're likely to face less border scuffles with the Martian Republic.

Conclusion

The Families disagree with each other on damn near everything. They are most united by a common enemy, be it Mars or Jupiter. However, in any case, they must stay united; without the Federation, their astropolitical position would be far, far worse. The Federation's treaties forcing the member Families to defend each other no matter how they may disagree with one another has kept them a relevant piece on the solar system's great chess board so far, but it's a volatile position. If they succumb to infighting, they'll likely be seen as a mere source of cheap metals instead of the dysfunctional but overall lovely collection of people with a stranglehold on the solar system's metals.

Also, for all of you typing up your comments about how it's aCtUaLLy the Confederate Union of Asteroid Families: YOU ARE WRONG. Sure, they called themselves that for most of the 2100s, but that was last damn century! If they still called themselves that, you'd think their politicians would use that name, if no one else, right? The name change was part of a late-2100s movement to make the federal government more powerful and unite the Families more, and if you were really as smart as you pretended to be, you would already know that! It's TECHNICALLY still more a confederation than a federation, but that's not what its NAME is. People should get this right more.

[shadethechangingman]

good lorth theres comics in there. weeklies

comments seem to be totally gone from RCO : (

poison ivy i knwo theyre gonna save janet bc its how comics are now but girll. die

TTG is so fun a little less vulgar than the cartoon but not quite as funny

nothing much to say abt the atom project ending!

v this panel from JSA is making me crazy im imagining the beak opening and closing when he talks

v birds of prey is usually fine but i just. uh really not into that sin-megeara design

batgirl is still good one day ill read enough to be able to see whats new in this backstory recap. cass looks so cute in that casual wear. love isaac goodharts style

abs GL is just so awesome STILL!!!!

abs superman is awesome but this wasnt the best issue imo

love the art for secret six, still dont like jeannette being part of checkmate, omg literally while i was typing out that the catshot bait was maybe too heavy it but OH MY GOD!!! OH MY GOD!!! THATS PERFECT. THATS WHAT I NEED, and i am enjoying what she's doing with jay so much, i just hope the eventual fix-up feels worth it and not rushed

also im sorry but im so sick of alan getting focus during pride

>question story is fine, i got confused for a minute bc i had thought the redhead with long hair was already kate😭

>connor story is kinda crap and fuck his modern hair/costume is so ugly it kills me every time. also like "i used to hang out at this gay bar when i was younger" WHEN?? LITERALLY WHEN?????

>REALLY GLAD THEYRE USING THAT DESIGN FOR STITCH!! not surprised that they didnt get their own story caus that qould require someone to think about them but also i dont feel like it wouldve fit the tone of this story. their appearance here barely does

>midpollo story was whatever i just dont really care about them

>the art in the harley story is so expressive but that first panel of pam looks like it was traced off ever after high lol

>coagula getting 1 page anf like 2 lines

>most of the ppl i wanted to see are shoved into the ensemble page or otherwise speechless in the background

>the jo/nubia one alright solid

>am i being dramatic if i say that ethans anecdotes are coming off narratively pro-mil

>WHO IS THE BALD GUY JDJIO#RJODWDFE i assume one of the writers

>blue snowman's gender identity is stiiiiiill a punchline. the fact theyre the only existing trans character with a story in this and its kinda punch down comedy sucks

>surface level i'm really happy its focused on a trans character esp a black trans man but also its an original transmasc military dude being the heart of this special when they wont even give any of their long standing trans characters stories for the last few YEARS. and i cant even say it would be better if they were trying to set him up as a hero bc Glacier happened and we never saw them again. EDIT: OK I FINISHED MONKEYS PAW CURL. glacier... 2! this time with magic fire instead. the light reflecting off his dog tags man 😭 we are never fucking seeing that guy again except maybe as a cameo in next years pride. im complaining now but knowing me next year ill be like hey wheres ethan why didnt they do anything with ethan

>reading alans last solo and not giving a fuuuuuuck about anything in it makes giving a fuck about him giving up his fantasy very hard. also screaming sobbing shoving random fucks in the backsround caus they cant be bothered to look up anyone else including ppl who were IN THE ISSUE.........

jenny blake's story at the end is so wonderful i don't even have words. made everything else melt away

[chuunibyoucatgirl]

yes, sex can just be kissing and humping and grinding until you both lose your minds. as long as you want it to be that, it can be that. the kinkier you are, the blurrier the line between sex and not-sex is. and in many ways, the easier it is to feel arousal and satisfaction for you and your partner, the blurrier the line is too. if you and your partner have been caged two weeks. and you unlock. and you're both incredibly sensitive, and you start making out. and you both start getting overwhelmed and ruin? clearly sex, in my book. if the same thing happens locked? sex. if the same thing happens locked and neither of you ruin? less obviously sex, sure, but the difference between sex and not-sex isn't in getting off. it doesn't have to be sex—you can be handsy and horny and all over each other and have it not quite hit sex—but if it crosses a certain fuzzy line of desire and intensity and intent to pleasure and feel pleasure, it's sex. this is inherently a bit subjective, but yeah. if you just rub my feet, that's probably not sex. If i start rubbing my stocking-clad soles on your crotch, that's obviously sex. But there is a world of grey inbetween these that is less obviously sex but can still work towards being sex. let's say I'm laying on a couch, you're at the other end. you rub my feet, but you start talking a bit dirty. I slip a foot up your skirt and graze your thighs over and over to watch your reaction. we're both obviously getting worked up, but we enjoy this exchange enough on its own to not escalate—hell, maybe we want to play chicken and see who will escalate first. this isn't sex yet, but it's only a few degrees of intent from sex. if both of us get so horny we can't help but start rubbing our stiff clits, and we egg each other on? that's absolutely sex, even if my toes never approach that girl's panties. and if we're both messed up enough and pavlov'd enough, if our brain wires are crossed enough we moan from that kind of dirty talk and egging each other on? we don't even have to move our hands anywhere near our panties to be fucking. am i confusing sex with foreplay or flirting? no, not really. my point is that these lines are fuzzy, exist on a continuum, and can even vary from person to person and situation to situation. the important thing is the sort of cooperative and participatory nature of the act (because otherwise, listening to horny asmr alone could be sex for some people—and that's not really capturing what sex is) and that the level of desire and intensity crosses a line. cumming isn't necessary; penetration isn't necessary; reciprocity isn't necessary; traditional sexual pleasure isn't necessary, and it certainly isn't necessary for both parties. both parties don't even need to be in the same physical location! a girl moaning on a voice call while her girlfriend controls a lovense is so obviously sex it's not funny. anyways... don't be lame about sex. it's way more fun if collaring a girl and walking her around the park and then pushing her against a wall and kissing her is sex. and if you don't think that, you might need to be collared and taken on a walk around the park and pushed against a wall and have another girl's tongue shoved in your mouth. c:

[pretentious-art-love]

The most relatable moment in all of One Piece.

Show Reviews #11 - One Piece's Amazon Lily I remember I said that One Piece islands feel always like new worlds and that every arc feels like a new isekai, and this arc is no exception!

We see many other worlds (islands) on this arc, but unfortunately we spend 91% of the arc in the worst of all the new worlds. (In the Pace edit the arc is 132 minutes long, only 13 minutes are spent to show the other worlds, and the rest of the arc is spent on Amazon Lily.

It's a bit of an old trope, a society where only women exist, then boom, a man appears, the women are confused and bewildered by him, they do silly things, shenanigans happen! Is that a mushroom? Oops! It feels silly complaining about it considering I don't think the writer wanted to make a point or anything with this, they just said, hey let's have a village of just women that would allow us to make a few jokes! But in any case of all the worlds I saw that was the least interesting of them all. There was a giant creatures world, a forced labor world, an abandoned castle world (with best girl returning), a social revolution world, a sky island, and even a world where everyone, no matter their physical sex, identifies as female! Genuinely an interesting and hilarious concept.

The main villain is just goofy, do you know that "save the cat" moment a villain can be given on a movie or story to prove they are not that evil? Well this villain literally has a kick the cat moment, she kicks a cat! Twice! Damn this lady must be serious business. The other characters were alright, I guess? There was only one amazon so that's a bummer.

The story is alright, I mean, there isn't too much story as there is world building, we meet new characters, they don't understand each other at first, they fight, and then they understand each other. One Piece is a silly story and to see the true depth of their characters they need to stay in the story for a long time, otherwise they will only be part of gags or on the nose cheesy moments. It's truly a transitional arc, and okay ish at best, but its biggest strength is Luffy who shines in his increasingly aro ace characterization (imagine if it was Sanji here instead, the horror) and that one moment I was finally able to see him self conscious and embarrassed when he got on the clothes gifted to him by the locals.

One thing I found interesting was that everyone assumed Luffy was a girl because they didn't know what a man looked like, at all. Until someone pointed it out, nobody even wondered if he in fact was a guy, this was done merely for the gag but it's funny to see writers point out that gender is a construct without actually realizing it at all. That is cool.

6/10

[fatuismooches]

ok im going to talk about dottore with a lover who hates wearing sunblock but is also pale because guess what (poses) also brought to you by the tiny sunburn on my shoulder (im korean so it's not as bad and i just tan but i also got the vampire genes) (aka: pale and looks young forever)

Dottore who has to sneak aloe or sunblock into lotion for his lover because they will just Not Wear Sunblock

In the deserts of sumeru and they're wearing clothes that show skin because its Fucking Hot? Refuse, absolutely not

"You're going to get burnt."

"If the sun decides it is my time it is my time"

"Absolutely not."

Dottore's lover who will whine and complain about having to wear sunblock because "it feels weird" as if getting sunburnt is any better

Dottore who KNOWS his lover knows why they should wear sunscreen but it's always a boss battle when he tries to get them to wear it.

One day, Dottore doesn't make them, figuring they'll learn their lesson, cue his lover covered in sunburns.. do they complain? no. do they learn from their mistakes? ALSO NO?? he's so confused and i think that's funny

It gets to the point where Dottore just makes his lover carry an umbrella because, then at least they're both somewhat happy

- 🎈 who spent too long at a water park, slipped and hurt their ankle, then caught air when on a water slide

🎈 ANON?? ARE YOU OKAY ??? I hope your ankle is okay!! 😭 Though i hope you had fun at the water park, that sounds fun ❤️

Anyway... 🎈 anon would you be alarmed if i said i like. never wear sunscreen... 💀 I don't think I've ever gotten really sunburnt though? Dottore will probably have to introduce me to sunscreen because I honestly forget it exists sometimes 😅

Regardless, this idea is so funny to me because he's going out of his way to care for you and you're just going to... deny his kind act? Who do you think you are? You're wearing this sunscreen, whether you like it or not. He will not hear of it when you start complaining of your skin hurting and cracking and will leave you to fend for yourself! (You never ended up complaining for some odd reason, but anyway, he begrudgingly applied some soothing cream on you while he just went on about how you need to listen to him otherwise this wouldn't have happened!! + insult insult insult) (he is still worried for you) (this has happened more than once) (for once he is unsure what to do and thinks you're a weirdo, affectionately though)

Reader is the kind of person to use the guise of the heat to pull Zandik under the umbrella with them, so they have an excuse to be close to him (too bad this isn't a perfect romantic novel rainy-day situation, Zandik doesn't fall for it because he wears sunscreen unlike someone else, he scowls)

Good thing in Snezhnaya sunscreen isn't needed anymore! You still keep the umbrella for memories though, it has probably gone through many trials but you love it anyway <3

[forlorn-crows]

Just wanted to say I absolutely LOVE Lady of the Lake and I've reread it so many times that I should be lowkey ashamed haha BUT

I'm also very curious about Nyneve's interactions with other ghouls like Delta or Dew. How did Dew find her?

You can absolutely take this as an opportunity to ramble about it if you want :)

okay so. i admit that technically the ghoul i call Water in my fic i guess is Delta? im terribly bad at tracking who's who in the water ghoul 'lore'. but Terzo called his bass player before Mist 'Water' so thats what i went with. so please call him whatever you'd like lmao.

for anyone who needs a refresher, this is sort of all i've established about Nyneve's past interactions w/ghouls or otherwise:

Uh, how long has it been? Since you’ve met a ghoul, I mean. Rain isn’t sure what to do with himself—what to do with his hands, his limbs, any of it. He dangles in front of her like a worm on a lure, and he supposes he is one, in a way. A slice of life outside the murky waters she inhabits. But he knows he’d be her catch of the day, not the other way around. 

Many years, Nyvene says wistfully. I can sense those who venture into the water at any depth, as well as those close to the shore. But the ones who seem most closely aligned to you have never traveled as far as yourself. They were surface dwellers. Rain gives her a confused look. Not all are drawn to the depths, and that is perfectly fine for a being such as myself. But I did begin to wonder who would come next.

Dew had been telling the truth, then. Who was before me?

His name was simply Water. He was quite robust in his search, perhaps a little impatient. But he was kind to me. So I cannot fault him too much. She seems wistful, reminiscent. Rain realizes he doesn’t know much about the water ghouls before him and Dewdrop, let alone any of the ghouls that came before their current pack. 

How many before him?

Many, she says simply.

Rain swallows, more bubbles escaping his gills. How, uh—how old are you, exactly?

Hm, age is a funny thing. That can’t be good. I have existed for a long time, longer than your congregation. 

So, we didn’t, um, create you?

No, my child. Though, the dark magick running more frequently through these lands has been . . . refreshing, to put it simply.

You’ve always been here? In this lake, I mean. 

Well, as long as I can remember, yes. She chuckles.

so, you'll notice, and as a gentle reminder, Dew and Mist did not interact with her. to me, they are not a deep-water alignment as Rain is. that's not to say Dew never meets her. because he does. but he didn't interact with her prior to Rain.

i think water ghouls, and ghouls/demons in general, have more specified alignments within the elements they are 'made' of/from. just water itself can be saltwater, freshwater, deep sea, rivers/streams, storms, ice, and things of the like.

so not all of them will have desired to go to the bottom of the lake (i think its pretty deep, think some of the deeper american great lakes depth despite its overall size). the elder ghouls may have passed down the knowledge about her, and some, like Water i think, dont. maybe theyre a little selfish about her, feel like theyve been 'chosen' and that everyone else should have to discover her too. with Water (again, Delta, w/e), it was turbulent with the new summonings, the changing of ghouls and even elements. there simply wasnt time to be like 'oh yeah also theres a big tentacle lady in the lake if you want to have a fun time' you know? not his fault.

so Nyneve's def had a relationship with many a ghoul, but it hasnt been linear. it hasnt all been water ghouls either, but i think the interaction of other elements has come and gone throughout time. i havent decided if any of the 'more recent' ghouls beyond the others mentioned have met her, or just know of her.

certainly there'd be urban legends passed around amongst humans that live in the surrounding areas, so they may have heard about something in passing. esp if any of those humans happened to become siblings of the church. but humans that do know of her have never truly known who she is, and mainly just call her varelse, creature. a monster.

the poem at the end you may have noticed uses her real name, Nyneve. so we can assume someone more personally familiar with her wrote it. scribbled it in some tome somewhere about local myths and legends, or historical drafts about the abbey itself.

she's very mysterious and not even i know everything about her, haha! dark magick gone rougue, some creature that crawled up from the depths, or something created by some long forgotten god.

all this to say, Rain had to introduce Dew to Nyneve. once he got over the fact that he'd have to tell everyone else about her, considering hed come home with sucker marks all over with no real logical explanation. i think Mountain is the first one he tells, but Dew is the first one he introduces.

i really appreciate that you enjoy LOTL so much; apologies for taking a little bit to answer this, but thanks for stopping by xx

if you havent already read about Nyneve and Rain, and this sparks your interest, you can do so here:

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[fearowkenya]

Winds of Change

Chapter 5: Something in the Air

Shuuji knows something is amiss when he catches Syakomon let out an almost imperceptible sigh of relief. He’s lucky that the viscous surface of Syakomon’s slimy green body betrays her—the quiver of the otherwise silent exhale sends a faint, wobbly shockwave across her skin, and she jiggles ever so slightly in her shell, as though somebody’s just set down a cautious bowl of lime-flavored jello.

Supposedly, the worst is over, but Shuuji can't shake the feeling that there's something the Kemonogami aren't telling him.

ao3 link in source , extended end-of-chapter author's notes under the cut!

oh BOY the editing situation was a doozy. granted, i was also busy with work, but even then this chapter needed a TON of reworking, much much more than chapter 4 did. like i said on ao3, it got to the point where this chapter was so long that i had to split it in two.

i also mentioned that this chapter marks the beginning of the second half of this fic. chapters 1-4 make up part one, which i'd summarize as "how did we get here?", and then from 5-8, the focus will be "what happens next?". it helped a LOT to recontextualize chapters 5-7 (now 5-8) as an answer to chapters 1-4, and i think it'll make editing easier going forward; i have much more direction now and a better idea of what needs to be expanded on and what needs to be cut.

unfortunately, like i said, i had to omit a lot of saki-centric stuff. she is the scariest character for me to write, and i think i need to progress more thru my replay of truthful before i feel confident enough to write from her perspective. it works out anyway, because the part i cut had shuuji taking a very passive role and just observing interactions between saki and floramon, and it felt very drawn-out and unnecessary. this is my favorite cut segment tho

im really hoping to be able to figure out what an aoi-miu-saki dynamic looks like as i get more comfortable writing the three of them. i think it could be really fun. also i think it would be so funny if miu and saki bring out a mischievous side of aoi that would otherwise not exist. much to think about.

anyway. another challenge i had with editing this chapter was the topography of the beach area the group hangs out at before moving on to the shopping district and apartment complex. for some reason i was convinced the rocky beach area was like.. up on a cliffside? but then i looked at the map and got REAL confused. the beach is super super narrow, and that was really inconvenient when i needed shuuji to be somewhere relatively out of the way, where he could have a conversation with agumon that takuma cannot hear, while still being able to see takuma. so thats why i spent an hour and change squinting at the tiniest png of the map and reorganizing where people spend their time

if my handwriting is illegible (from left to right) (oh my god now that ive added the image to the post its a nightmare. idk why im even posting it. lord. im not sure opening it in a new tab will help) factory residential area shopping district woods near shopping district minoru up here group rests here waterway exit from shaft here instead; rest of waterway rock w/ supplies hill down from the waterway shuuji rests here pt 6 argument happens here aoi & ryo here in ch4 (this is where they were keeping watch) miyuki here

i didnt make many changes; mostly i just moved people around. the one thing that i DID change though was the placement of the waterway entrance. i have NO IDEA why the game has it in the middle of the fucking ocean. like i know theres a tunnel there, but surely the entrance to that tunnel isn't underwater right? i then poured another hour and change learning about waterways, trying to figure out where it made the most sense to put the exit before remembering that it doesn't matter because the digital world doesn't play by human world rules. oops! it was still super interesting though! please look up 'tokyo g-cans' if you ever get the chance, its fucking fascinating. if i ever go back to japan id like to go down there, maybe.

obligatory commentary about the map:

oh my god it seems too big for what we actually see but im not a cartographer so i dont know for sure

the shopping district/apartment complex is visible from the beach but i feel like it shouldn't be: on the map it looks like it's on a cliff face while from the beach it looks like it's shore level

i've been reading half the green patches as dense tree cover but now that i think about it, that might just be open grassland. oops. it's all trees now.

i wish we could go to the sandy beach areas to the north and east ends of the island!!! that could've been fun!

i really appreciate that the second island is shaped vaguely like a beluga

in other news, agumon was much easier to write than i was worried he would be, and it was nice to work out how he felt about what happened in the waterway. one thing ive noticed about agumon on a second truthful run is that he and takuma are equally awful about pushing down their own feelings for the sake of the ones of their friends. a lot of the others seem to view agumon as the guy who is always Staying Silly , no thoughts head empty. while i DO think that that's a genuine part of his personality, i think it also happens sometimes that he uses that image to downplay his concerns.

my favorite part to write this chapter was labramon's dialogue at the end. and also baby stats. baby stats was the ONE THING i REFUSED to cut. non-negotiable. it's been in my notes since the beginning and digimon survived all edits of this chapter, and i was DETERMINED to keep it.

all right im getting sleepy and i want to post this chapter and then go to bed. as usual please dont be afraid to leave a comment, i looooove finding out people's favorite parts, and im still curious about your Gamer Theories, especially now that i think what i'm foreshadowing is becoming clearer and clearer >:3c

couldn't tell you for sure when ch6 will be out. ideally it won't involve as much editing as ch5, but it's hard to say. thank you for reading, and i'll be back as soon as i can!

[variousqueerthings]

Personally, I think that's a hell of a bird.

Heaven Sent! (we'll do Hell Bent separately!) it's an episode! that is going to be difficult to talk about! because yes it is good, but I am. I have mixed feelings about it, because I think parts of it rest on everything leading to this point and as we know, looking back at M*ffat's era, everything Did Not lead us to this point. however, if we pretend that it did and do some creative reading of narrative, that is how we'll try to engage with this story

luckily I have a system! otherwise this would become totally incomprehensible (although, this could still happen... watch out)

sexism rank objectification (female character is ogled/harassed/turned into a sex joke by the doctor and/or a lead we’re supposed to root for and/or the camera): 10/10

sexism rank plot-point (lead female character is only there to serve plot, not to have her emotional interiority explored, or given agency to her emotional interiority): 1/10

interesting complex or pointlessly complex (does the complexity serve the narrative or does it just serve to be confusing as a stand-in for smart, this includes visually): 7/10

furthers character and/or lore and/or plot development (broader question that ties into the previous ones, at least two of these, ideally three should be fulfilled): 5/10

companion matters (the companion doesn’t always have to be there, but if the companion is there, can they function without the doctor– and overall per season how often is the companion the focus or POV of the story): 5/10

the doctor is more than just “godlike” (examines the doctor’s flaws and limitations, doesn’t solve a plot by having it revolve entirely around the doctor’s existence): 9/10

doesn’t look down on previous doctor who (by erasing or mocking its importance, by redoing and “bettering” previous beloved plotpoints or characters, etc.): 8/10

isn’t trying to insert hamfisted sexiness (m*ffat famously talked a lot about how dw should be sexier multiple times, he sucks at writing it): 10/10

internal world has consistency (characters have backgrounds, feel rooted in a place with other people, generally feel like they have Lives): 6/10

Politics (how conservative is the story): 6/10

FULL RATING: 67/100 (if I can count….)

according to this rating's system this episode is worse than Face The Raven, which is patently untrue on a quality level, but we're looking at some very Specific criteria, so what canya do

OBJECTIFICATION: Clara is a figment of the Doctor's hallucination and he's not weird about her. I mean, also why would he be, because this Doctor has not been categorised as a lech (I have a theory that it was very much Capaldi's influence that lead to lechery going down basically 100% by this point -- I mean, he did say he didn't want to have any will-they-won't-they with JLC because she's just way younger than he is, and that is incredibly fair, if kind of funny, because of course, regardless of the age of the actor, the Doctor-as-character is usually always much much older than all the Companions. BUT THAT ASIDE LECHERY IS OUT! SCHOOLTEACHER COMPANION IS IN!)

PLOT-POINT: that being said... I know Clara is "dead," and that this episode isn't about her in the slightest, but I get this feeling... you know that one Twitter thread that comes around on this site sometimes about someone who was at a funeral and the dead woman's husband gave eulogy and spoke entirely about himself/what his wife gave to him, and not a single thing about who she was as a person. that's... that sums up Clara to me, and this episode really hammers it home

the Doctor is out for revenge for Clara, but this episode gives us a Doctor who's so sad she's dead, and yet not a single thing in this episode explores that particular sadness. Instead, that sadness is a catalyst for an exploration of the Doctor, with Clara's ghost doing exactly the same as Clara did throughout her run as his Companion -- asking him questions that only he had the answers to. Clara is dead, and yet this barely feels different to her presence, in *spins the wheel* under the lake/before the flood or idk, the caretaker or listen

and the thing is, that Clara wasn't originally categorised like this, and there are still episodes where she has emotional reactions to things (cold war my beloved), it's something that I think actually got worse throughout her run, rather than better, which is a shame, because for the most part everything generally was getting better throughout Twelve's era

COMPLEXITY: this is both quite simple and quite complicated, but it's complicatedness comes from things around the episode, rather than the format of the episode itself, so. divide it into two

in the episode itself, the Doctor wakes up in a transporter, explores a weird cog-like castle, eventually discovers that there's a massive wall of stuff that'd take, ooh 4 billion or so years to punch through that could be the escape, and proceeds to punch, while a mysterious creature stalks him, kills him, and he manages to send himself back through the transporter to start again

this is super cool and brings up a bunch of questions about various things -- the nature of life and linear time (after all, the Doctor doesn't remember being killed over and over and over again, but also kind of lives for 4 billion years), the Doctor's relationship to dumb, stubborn perseverance in the face of complete hopelessness, but also to avoiding their own pain by continuing on and on and on, there's the oddness of the castle itself and the creature within it which is surprisingly toned down for a M*ffat-written thing, allowing Capaldi to take the centre without distractions, and then there's also the Doctor's monologue, because this is almost entirely Peter Capaldi, and so a neat little insight into ways the Doctor interacts with situations

there's even stuff that I usually dislike with M*ffat that I enjoy here -- the idea of monologuing genius who does some seemingly random shit that turns out to be Very Clever And Necessary is such a M*ffat hallmark, but in this one it works because the Doctor is working through problems with themself. yes, one could say there's a meta-look-at-me-I'm-so-clever element to it, since there is an audience (us) but because there's no internal audience, we get to see how this technique functions not to show off, but to do a multitude of things, like stave off fear in a tense situation, make a distraction, resist loneliness, simply help the Doctor understand a situation by verbalising it, etc

so yes, woo to this plot, woo especially to Peter Capaldi and to Murray Gold for supporting the narrative so well, the music really is part of what Makes this episode

2. the second, wider plot concerns itself with "why is the Doctor here," "what is this place," who set in motion the events that killed Clara," "who the fuck cares about the Hybrid plot" (pedantic, I apologise), "what is the Hybrid," things along those lines. they are. technically important questions. and some of them are well-answered -- what is this place? it's the Confession Dial, and the Doctor got stuck in there by being teleported from the end of the last episode (genuinely had forgotten until I reread the transcript of Face The Raven, woops, but we remembered again!) and the people who hired Me, as it turns out, are Gallifreyans, because at the end of the episode, the Doctor returns to Gallifrey

and that... is next episode fuckery, but I will say that I did scratch my head about it at the end of this one. how'd they hire Me from wherever the Time Lords are stuck? did we miss an episode that explained that actually the Doctor did find the Time Lords?

for that matter, there's this short before the season starts where the Doctor is chatting with The Sisterhood Of Karn, and we last saw them back in s7 in the Eighth Doctor short -- they're the ones that made the War Doctor. And they turn up in the first episode of this season as well, and again, I'm like. wait did I miss something here?

I think that this season has a lot of that for me, there's a lot of questions I have that I will make a separate post on. things that may very well have been properly built up and explained and I just missed, but genuinely at the moment I'm going... huh?

and for this purpose, end of this episode, it's... wait how'd you just get back to Gallifrey??? I thought you were still looking for it, how'd the Confession Dial get there?

while the s5-7 arc certainly had a lot of things that went "eh trust me, this'll aaaaall lead somewhere" and then... I mean, kinda did but badly and last-minute, s8 didn't really lead into the events of s9, so the whole Hybrid and Confession Dial was this season's... mystery I guess? except idk why it suddenly matters, why did Davros bring it up?

maybe I need to rewatch that episode. but also seriously where did Gallifrey come from???

I also question the plan to put the Doctor in there -- so he's in there in order to interrogate him on the Hybrid but... is that.... really the best way to do that??? I don't think that makes a whole lotta sense unless I missed something there as well. I mean, this creature kills the Doctor, it doesn't really set out to torture for information, even though the Doctor interprets it as such. the intent is lacking in logic I think

point is, if we ignore the wider plot happening around Heaven Sent, it's thematically strong. ignore why the Doctor is there and the episodes around it for a second, have a good time (well, the Doctor isn't having a good time!)

also wtf was with that creature in there. I mean, it was cool and all and it made the plot go, but... why was it there again? maybe I'll add that to my questions post

CHARACTERS/LORE/PLOT: we learn bits and bobs about the Doctor in this one, like for example that they didn't run from Gallifrey because they were bored but because they were "scared" (which I'm sure surprised nobody, but the point is hearing the Doctor admit it outright -- therapy under pain of death, literally), and generally that they're afraid of dying

technically this episode is the least lore and plot heavy of the three at the end, when you think about it. it's very much there to make you read into the Doctor, because there's no one else there

I think. if there was one thing. I would have really really wanted from it, in terms of this point. it's an understanding of why the Doctor was travelling with Clara, beyond "she's my friend." I feel like on sooome level I can suss out why Clara travels with the Doctor (she is emotionally all over the damn place and seeking those thrills without thinking about consequences), but I never did understand the Doctor travelling with Clara in s9. it feels like they're together in that season because... well, they were together before. and there's this "duty of care" line that comes up a few times this season, which is kind of a new one from the Doctor at Clara, considering their last two seasons together, and I kind of wish there'd been a bit on that

I get it, this is an episode All About The Doctor, but it's set nearly immediately after Clara dies. even as the Doctor is essentially resurrected over and over again for billions of years, to them Clara died a few minutes ago every single time. there's something slightly jarring to me about making this relatively quiet, contemplative, philosophical episode all about the Doctor, with Clara functioning as a crutch to the Doctor's emotions and explorations... but she's dead. it goes back to what I was saying about the eulogy. this episode tells me nothing about Clara and the Doctor, other than that he's sad she's dead and she asked questions (but even then, these questions aren't actually being asked by Clara, he's just imagining it's her)

COMPANIONS MATTER: see I put this one at a five, because I acknowledge that the Companion doesn't always have to be there and that is true, AND although she's not there she does help out about as much as she usually does

“GODLIKE” DOCTOR: I've scored this one quite highly, despite it literally being "all about the Doctor," but it's only "all about the Doctor" because it's the Doctor's Confession Dial -- the next episode may score somewhat lower on this point, because then we really do get a fair bit of Doctor is centre of all important events and we all just orbit around them, but in this case it is fair

and if we actually look at what the episode is saying about the Doctor, it really does follow a fallible, questioning person who needs time to figure out what's happening, and then is like "the answer is to really painfully punch for 4 billion years" which... yeah that tracks

PREVIOUS DOCTOR WHO: this episode isn't very classic lore heavy. idk if it should be, considering it's about the Doctor, but it might have taken up too much space in a relatively stripped back character study. it does interact with the "ran away because I was bored" line which goes as far back as Two, so there is that less in-your-face reference, that also adds to the Doctor as we've gotten to know them in especially nu!who

“SEXINESS”: C U R E D of bad sexy talk (at least, until Husbands of River Song, but even that is shockingly parred back)

INTERNAL WORLD: we're in a Confession Dial, specifically the Doctors. maybe the Confession Dial should've gone up in lore, but I'm going for it as a world for now. the Doctor's confession dial is a turning castle with an endless ocean beyond it. I don't know if all Confession Dials are the same, or if it's just this one

I do actually have questions about how it's meant to work, because in the next episode (yes, cheating) the Doctor says it's meant to be this meditative, important process, and it was abused in order to "interrogate" them about the Hybrid, so is big clockwork creature always there? or is that a the Doctor must suffer special or???

idk what the consensus on the inside of the Confession Dial is. do we like this design? does it make sense for the Doctor? is it the Doctor's own mind that supplies the imagery? lot of questions I have there, add those to the question-pile

I like the Confession Dial as Vibes, but I don't know what the imagery of this place has to do with the Doctor as character, is basically my summary of this point

POLITICS: there's not really politics in this episode, which means.... let's look for the politics that's not in here. No, in many ways it doesn't need to be politically focused. it leaves us with the writing of female characters, which wasn't greaaaat but not technically the point eitherrrrr but also it Culminates in this one, so I do have to mention it on this particular point.

As a general, if there were political undertones in this episode, what do we think they could have been on? the ethics of Gallifreyan society prompting the Doctor to run away? the philosophical nature of the Doctor's tendency to run? ideas around trying despite it being all-but-hopeless as something one could relate to real-world causes? I'm spitballing, I'm not saying this episode needed that. I'm just musing

FULL RATING: 68/100 (if I can count….)

the more I think about this episode, the more questions arise -- most of them in connection with what happens next, but I do think it's flawed to not think about what happens next if one is trying to do a deeper dive into the story, as I'm doing. one can enjoy it as its own thing for its strong themes, Capaldi's acting, the music, the Vibes, but I do think it still suffers from aaaalmost every M*ffat limitation (minus the outright sexism) in that it sets up questions that will never be answered and goes more for Vibe than... idk what to call it, this is Doctor Who, but... realism? wider internal world consistency?

this is a good episode, and I think I'd enjoy it a heck of a lot more if it was a standalone, a la God Complex (which did some similar things to this episode, and personally is still my favourite of the M*ffat era), but all the questions keep bursting in

still, that's a hell of a bird (do we ever apply this story to Doctor Who gifsets/fanfics and the like? I'm sure we do, I just haven't engaged with Twelve-era much because this is only my second watch of it)

actually another question: why is it called heaven sent?

[hanafubukki]

Hiiiiiii Hana, how's you day going? (⁠人⁠ ⁠•͈⁠ᴗ⁠•͈⁠)

I have a very silly idea that I wanted to share. For context: In Skyrim, the protagonist is a dragonborn and they can talk in dragon language, it's kind of funny specially because they're always screaming. Anyways, I was imagining Yuu, who played Skyrim, going to Malleus to test all those "words" just to see if they are true or not (it would be fun if it wasn't but Lilia hopped into this and then he and Yuu just started talking with one another like it's the most normal thing to do while Malleus is there, frozen, thinking if this vocabulary does exist and he just didn't know about 🤭)

Anyway dunno if this made sense, it's 02am rn and I'm pretty sleep. But I want to share this bcs the thought was hilarious on my head and I didn't want to forget tomorrow morning

G'night!!! Or good morning, idk when you're going to be reading this lmao

Hi Lorkai 🌺🌷💚

My day’s going good. Been battling the heat 😫 but otherwise making up for it with a cool drink. How about you? I hope you’ve been staying warm? Did it get cold in your area yet?

Skyrim! I remember Skyrim very vaguely because I used to yell at my sibling not to kill the dragons 🔫😫 but I remember the theme song!

Absjsjshs poor Malleus would be so confused! How does he not know this language? Lilia seems to know it but why doesn’t he? Does his grandmother know it? Why hasn’t he been taught?

Poor fae is going to feel left out and pouting. He’s the dragon fae here, why aren’t you talking to him? He also wondering if maybe the language went out of style because…why are you two yelling? Its seems more of a hassle than anything (he’s still pouting 😆)

Please include him next time but maybe tone down the screaming as…a dragon’s roar can destroy buildings 😂🤣

Good night Lorkai 🫂💚💞

Sleep well and sweet dreams 💕😘