#posting this mainly for myself cus I keep on thinking about it…..

[gubdam]

Art by cyaninefinch on twit

(Reposted with permission)

[felipe-v-fanblog]

Hello, my friend. I am curious to know what good things Philip V has done for Spain.

Are there movies or shows about him?

What historical events do you wish to see if there are shows about him someday? For me, The Spanish War of Succession, his first years as king, and his struggles.

ah, i love talking about period dramas . I have been a bit sad lately so I am not very into tumblr . May answer later to answers to this post or dms. I think I have more stuff to answer in replies ? I should check out my notifications .

III i wrote a lot under the cut . I am not sad anymore hehe thinking about period dramas is one of my big passions

As for good things Philip V has done for Spain — not many, dont think so. I like him for his human side ( which is , to be honest , the most part of him because he wasnt either very interesed in politics , he had bigger conflicts by himself to bother on that stuff ) . I like him as a person but I know people do think of kings who didnt do stuff for their countries as traitors or lazy people . I dont think Philip V as a tyranical king , since he came to Spain he always had doubts and Alberoni and the princess of Urzins had to reassure him to keep being on the throne since he was 17 — which is interesting considering he will later abdicate the throne when his inner turmoil is too much for him .

I personally love french movies . I really like France as a whole so I really liked L'Échange des princesses ( I dont know its name in english , but I know its name in spanish is Cambio de princesas or something like that , I watched it on spanish and french ! Couldnt understand the spanish one tbh ) . It is really good I really really loved it . I love french period dramas I think they are just the best . This is genuinely one of my favourites period dramas . I am not good at summarizing stuff in english but it is about the french and the spanish court around the time Philip V abdicated the throne ( which does happens in the movie ) THE SCENES OF PHILIP ARE SOOOOO EPIC it makes me happy when i remember them . he is so peak . I really liked how they stylized him he did in fact had a big ass wig they didnt exaggerated it . They did a very good job portraying his character but I think he talked too much during the movie and he usually didnt talked that much IRL . He was very shy and anxious when talking to people . But eh it makes sense as he was mainly talking to family . I really liked him nonetheless . Louis XV , Louis I of Spain , some infantes and baby Charles III of Spain appear in the movie . There is also Liselotte !! The duchess of Orléans . I really love her they did such a good job at portraying her too . I LOVE THAT MOVIE I GENUINELY LOVE IT !! This is the only movie I have ever seen about Philip V but I know my spaniard gf likes this spanish series ? which is about people who travel around time as far as I know ? where he appears with a very cheap wig and there is also Isabel de Farnesio which is the star of the show . I dont really know about it but spaniards like it so I guess it must be good . Its called El Ministerio del Tiempo and I only know it because Velázquéz ( the painter ) and Blas de Lezo appear there and I wanted to watch it someday but I dont like this kind of shows . I do know about that one Netflix show La cocinera de Castamar but I dont like it when they use modern hairstyles for period dramas it gives off lazy vibes so I dont watch them . Its a pity cus I love George III but there is a netflix show about him which seems good but I cannot bear the thought of George III being a normal person . May kill myself later .

Shows I would like :3 — I love love love love love loveeee imagining shows and movies I am a cinephile . I have a letterboxd account where I share my elitist taste on movies . I am a boring person who watches very boring movies and love it . I dont know if you are into that kind of period dramas ? the more experimental ones ? like the ones of Albert Serra ( La Mort de Louis XIV , Història de la meva mort , Liberté ) or Ken Russell ( The devils , Lisztomania , Prisoner of Honor ) or Derek Jarman ( Caravaggio , Sebastiane , Edward II , War Requiem ) — I am also super into the ones produced during the USSR , mainly about Ivan IV ; but I am also into normal recent stuff like Mary & George ( I LOVED this one ) and Marie Antoinette ( the 2006 movie and the 2022 series ! I really like anything Canal+ produces ) and well the Napoleon movie . Was it released last year ? Ah I do also liked Jeanne du Barry but people think that one is lame . Not me tho . I loved Jeanne du Barry I am into anything french . After saying all of this yeah I would love a biography movie á la Jeanne du Barry or Marie Antoinette ( 2006 ) or Napoleón . Something that lasts 2 hours and that the public completely hates but I will like it nonetheless . Impossible to make . Impossible to produce . No one would buy this idea . But it lives rent free on my mind . I genuinely love all of Philip V s life iiiiiiiii it makes me so happy to think of him when he was young and then when he was an adult and then when he was just trying to die in peace . Good boy . Would give him a lollipop to cheer him up . AH WHAT WAS I TALKING ABOUT . Ah yes . Ehh I think how he comes to Spain and all the weird things that happen around him — which are a lot , surprisingly , and very weird ? Like I genuinely cannot BELIEVE Alberoni was made prime minister I GENUINELY CANNOT UNDERSTAND HOW DID THAT MAN BECAME PRIME MINISTER I CANNOT UNDERSTAND — And so . Eh I think the war of succession would be very interesting yes . It would be a bit too sad . I dont think there could be any way to make that movie with a happy ending or a lesson . I think its a bad idea to produce . But I would love it but it would be a complete failure like Philip V himself ( I love him ) . Maybe I would add him to a Louis XIV series or in the last part of a movie of him , as Philip V himself is a very niche spot in history . Spain its very niche in itself . I dont really think it would ever be a Philip V movie as spaniards hate him , but I think there would be a very interesting opportunity for Isabel II of Spain or Charles V of Habsburg . I really like Ferdinand II of Spain I think they should make a movie about him and Isabel and Juana and Felipe I . Outside of Spain I want a Frederick the great biopic I DONT KNOW WHY THERE ISNT ONE OF HIM ?? ... like there is but its a nazi movie ( lol ) so its super historically innacurate . life is hard . kisses and my best wishes my friend will !! ask for period dramas to you too as i want to watch something lately

[alpha-male-podcast]

Marinette, neurodivergent? P1

Marinette - Autistic - I think she’s autistic, hear me out, because of the fact i find myself relating to marinette in so many ways and I myself am neurodivergent. You totally don’t have to agree just my headcanon pls don’t disagree on my post cus this is my personal headcanon

-clumsiness

-hyper focusing on projects to the point i spend hours and lose my time

-being late (poor time management)

-hyper focusing on someone that i love (doesn’t have to be romantic)

-worrying constantly about the safety of my friends and family

-my feeling like i have to be in charge of everything and do everything and not let my friends/family help because i don’t want them to get hurt or do it in a way that’s not the exact way i planned it

-explaining things poorly to the point people do not understand (keep rambling until it is past the point of understanding and having to restart what I say entirely)

-people not following my way of thinking (don’t understand why i do things a certain way)

-coming up with complicated plans to avoid the simplest way possible because i think it’s not the right way or i’m too scared

-not understand why people don’t like my plans (they see it as too over the top or complicated or just plain don’t make sense which normally they don’t or they think they don’t)

-i don’t like taking breaks until i figure out the answer often burning out / like her I do this with projects and crafts mainly, or she does this with finding out the meaning of the miraculous while I would do this with my interests in finding things out about science or psychology

-pretend everything is fine but still wanting people to see i’m not fine but feeling guilty when i tell them i’m not fine

THESE ARE MY MAIN POINTS, MY SECOND POST IS RAMBLING

[jrueships]

what are the best wire ships?

YALL SHOULD NOT HAVE ASKED ME THIS LMAO 😭😭 i am so not serious to be the header on the wire fandom resurrection front but here we go 😭 i guess 😭! I HOPE URE READY CUS IM NOT LMFAO

FYI this post might contain some spoilers to the show but if u want a nonspoilerly version, just asked! it's pretty old so if yall haven't seen it i 10/10 recommend!!!

im painfully trying a rewatch of the show, i say painfully because my attention span watching a show vs a movie is KAPOOT! i can't stream 30 hours of a show but i can sit thru a 3 hr movie (if i haven't seen it before. Ill still have to get up and stretch sometime in the middle of it but ill be attentive nonetheless). LIKE... sitting thru a long movie holds more accountability to my mind i think. If i can't binge thru multiple episodes and end on a comfy, even number like episode 10, i can't bring myself to sit thru one without checking my phone 😭 BUT IT IS A GOOD SHOW! i just suck at watching shows in general, especially past the 1st season.. idek why.. it's like i get thru the 1st season in a happy binge breeze then BOOM! no more motivation... BUT WHAT I MEANT WITH THIS IS!!!!

This 1st post will mainly just kinda lightly touch on general knowledge from season 1 then expand in detail the more seasons i rewatch (with more ships too probably). This is mainly my fav ships i noticed now or back then

TO BE NOTED THO!! the wire isn't a really shippy show tbh, it's mainly about dynamics thru relationships contributing to story/effect on the story rather than romantic relationships. Every plot point has to have an eventual purpose for the story, every interaction, etc. It has like one will they won't they mainly for angst, and it's for Detective McNulty who has a general 'will he won't he' beat the Irish drinking gene or whatever lmao. If u wanna ship, u gotta really take the few nuggets the show might give u and REALLY turn them to gold. Cus they are gold in general, but it's up to you to make them really profit! IN CONCLUSION.. u gotta be. A little delusional. Hence our first 'ship' introduction..

🩵 stinkum & bird 🩵

... i told you we had to be a little unwell to really indulge. Sorry.

this is a totally biased list so please excuse me. Stinkum n Bird are two of Avon's muscle in the game and they both get outta it pretty quick. Involuntarily, of course, because they're the typa freaks that love it. With these two, you need context clues n connections. Almost EVERY scene Stinkum is in, he's GOT TO bring up his boy Bird. Hell, it might just be every. This is mainly due to the writers knowing the actor of bird is a big shot cameo, so it'd be too expensive to have Bird in a lot of scenes, especially in a TV show budget. And they also knew Stinkum wasn't made to last long so why not just use him as a substitute introduction to Bird's character so we don't have to pay that much for personal appearance in prologue? Bird's supposed to be the 'unhinged' one in the crew, the Crazy Guy. Crude, rude, cruel, & ruthless. Don't have the budget to show it, cheaper to tell it instead. Stinkum's just the hype man to Bird, essentially. Also he has another thing going on that leads to his early demise, but besides that, that's pretty much it. Goes to show how the show wants every dime spent for a strategical reason. Good TV shows need Causation, not 'and then's, but 'therefore' 'so' ETC.

... doesn't mean we can't have fun with it ourselves though. See, The Wire brings you quality entertainment, & it's up to us what we make of that quality to be entertained. Up to our love of the show to keep coming back to it and exploring the prime time possibilities it presented/hinted/hid. Which is a lot since practically every part of it is practical. The beauty of Stinkum n Bird to me is Stinkum being some wide-eyed doe eyed obsessed little freak who woobifies n glorifies n babygirlifies Brutal As Fuck bird because? He's insane. I guess? They both are! This is evidenced in the show, on purpose for plot! But this purpose can be made even better if we make something accidental out of it. Take the gold and spread its profits through smaller amounts, cut the product for bigger prices! LISTEN LIKE.. they made stinkum's character constantly bringing up Bird's name for plot... but him always yammering on about Bird can mean other things...... dare i say... gay things 😈. WHY does he always talk about Bird? For cheap character intro to get us ready when Bird makes his short appearance eventually yea but WHAT ELSE? they're giving us an ELSE without rlly GIVING us an else! Stinkum, who's a bit of a dopey lil goon guy, might have been unknown to a certain shooting danger one night when BLAM! He turns around, not filled with lead, but with awe for the guy he just saw skin a man alive... save HIS skin by dealing with his unforeseen assailant. Stinkum sees a softer side to the craziest, cruelest guy in their group, and has his respect eternally earned. Does Bird ever return it?? We don't know.... Bird never mentions Stink. Which creates more fun for us cus we get bounce off that with whatever the hell we want. It always goes back to the source! IF YOU WANT.. i recommend looking up 'the wire stinkum' / 'the wire bird' and ull find their scenes that show more of their character. I can elaborate on a single ship in more detail if u want, just ask ! trust me, id be MORE than happy to lmao!

🩵 Bird n Omar 🩵

Apparently, thanks to Stinkum, we know Bird n Omar jailed with each other. And STINKUM heard from BIRD that Omar was gay?? Which is like.. ok. Thanks stinkum/bird??? That's a bit.. what do u mean by that... have you, Bird, man whose little scenes he's shown is spewing same sex sexuality slander 99% of the time, Experienced that info Firsthand? Are you. Perhaps. Were you... One of Omar's whole stable of boys he had while locked up at Jess Up 🤨? ...the public needs to know 😈. Is all this talk you have against the lgbt.. perhaps... coming from a bit of internalized Rage 🤨? hm 😼? AND THIS ISNT JUST MY SPECULATION EITHER!! Other wire fans thought this!! They were sus on stinkum n Bird's relationship too!!! hell i GOT that idea from one of the wire's youtube COMMENTS!! yall we see it.. we do. Also Omar is 5'10... Bird is 5'3 at worst (says he's 5'5 but trust me. That is a definite lie.) .. Bird's also Omar's type too (which i find hilarious).. lightskinned. some may say, even, a little bratty BUT HEY! HEY!! im just usin my context clues given to me from THE SHOW ok! dont shoot the messenger bird... Omar looked like he was enjoying Bird getting his comeuppance a little Too well in that police interrogation scene.. i wouldn't be surprised if there was a deleted scene of him saying 'oh what a mouth'... BUT FROM THE SCENE GIVEN TO US THO.. what do you Mean 'bird really knows how to bring it out of people', Omar 🤨? What do you. What do you Mean by That 🤔? something.... explicit 🫣?

ANYWAYYYSS... smthin Bigger.

🩵Avon & Stringer 🩵

u rlly do have to see the show for all of these to rlly land with u tbh, the bigger ones especially bcs when the show has two characters they keep close for long... u know they're gonna be in pain. And u are too. I love avon and stringer man they make me so 😭😭!! One bleeds red the other bleeds green... ones all for family, the other for profession but DAMN IT! He thought he was family too, isn't it? Aren't i... Avon ? If the other ship types were doofy tongue out loyal to the bone tail wagging dumbly following dog Stinkum x asshole cat with claws who Maybeeee has a Slight soft spot for the dog where only HE can scratch it sometimes Bird, or elegant silk n clever streetcat with a semi bitten ear who steals fish with class Omar x rowdy rabid orange tabby cat who jumps at windows trying to eat other cats Bird..... this one is . Opposites attract. Unlikely friends to the end. Unlikely betrayal in bonds. Unlikely.. Unlikely. I don't wanna speak on it too much incase u haven't seen the show. It's just so good, it needs a justification thru watch. Avon and stringer together.. u can just feel the connection. Like these two Were childhood friends and now all this shit is happening to them.. this rift. It sucks!! It makes u wish the old days with them!! It makes u feel like an old head! Makes u feel what they're probably feeling but can't express cus they don't have the power or the pride rn!! I love them. They make me miserable. Avon and stringer were THE powercouple on the wire. They were THE girlboss malewife powercouple takeover. THE adhd bf Autistic bf romance. OKAY??? I just have to tell u the terms, it's up to u to see the show explain it. Watching stringer infodump about whatever smthing new he learned in his community college econ's is so cute. His finance bro business bro interests 😭 Avon acknowledging it and helping him indulge in it!! Making it a giant part of his organization!!! Avon the hardworking son from a long line of feared bad blood incorporating his businesstime consigliere godfather type shit ! Seeing avon get all excited at the bball game, jumping up n stomping the ground when he's winning or losing Lmao. Stringer roasting the competition, joining in on the pettiness. I love them. They're my petty powercouple and I GET TO SAY THEY DESERVED TO KISS EACH OTHER!! And GET MARRIED and LOVE EACH OTHER!!! okay!!! In another life avon is the prideful n stubborn basketball coach for their cc's poor basketball team and stringer is the sexy rich new econ professor who got demoted for being too harsh on his past private college students. D'angelo the spoiled nephew hates going to Stringer's class and hates Stringer even more when he becomes his strict new stepdad thanks to googly eyes at Avon. The coparenting comes with its troubles..

Another big crime dealing (literally) powercouple on the newer side..

🩵 marlo & Chris 🩵SHUTUP ABT CHRIS'S HAIR I TRIED OKAY IM NOT TRYING THAT HARD OKA

this one is mainly dynamic, there are some works for marlo/chris, but it's mainly dynamic exploration or relationship hinting if u squint but kept kinda dim under the surface. What's interesting abt these two is that.. They're just so interesting. It's like.. how Did they meet? WHY is chris so loyal to marlo? Also it's on misinterpretations too cus people might look at chris and think he's the ruthless killer who takes joy in his killings since he's big muscle for marlo's group... but actually he's a very chill (unless ur crime is Bad.) kinda kind n polite guy with a butler-like professional nature in his affable behavior sometimes . VS everyone thinking marlo is some emotionless, bug-eyed freak who just watches from the dark. And he is LMAO. Just like how chris CAN be ruthless, marlo CAN be hauntingly apathetic. But he can ALSO be very petty. I mean, half his Google images are of him looking disgusted LMAO. He's almost always vaguely annoyed, impeded upon, or intrigued. And chris n him Both know the other should not be messed with when pissed. If avon and stringer are the more kind of 'front and center' powercouple at the party, Marlo and chris are the two lonely assholes sitting in the dark corner (uninvited btw) of the party, vaping and judging people. Marlo doesn't drink, so he's just sipping ice water out of a red solo cup telling chris to kill whomever marlo finds insignificant (so everyone) while chris stares at the weather app on his phone, not knowing what to do. I love them in the goofy sense. They're just so awkward. Bruh girl 4 bruh girl. When two mfers with social skills where u can tell it's ok Except there's just smthin kinda Off about them, keeping them from being normL, find each other... the world burns. And it Did. They both have insane trauma and i think they should kiss. Ill def reblog with more abt them when i get to the later seasons rewatch..

🩵 Omar's og crew with him, Brandon, n bailey 🩵

i loved Omar's og little Robin hood crew so much 😭 it's a shame the wire back then didn't know how successful it'd be, so they introduced n had the other members live so short for story. They shouldve had more screen time fr! Doing shenanigans!! i just love the dynamic of Omar n Brandon being best bfs... Omar simping for Brandon n letting his mistakes slide bcs hes down bad for the lightskin.. and then there's lone wolf John bailey who just has to third wheel with them. Bailey is known to just go wherever the money goes, do whatever to get whatever, mix with whatever for whatever, so gotdammit if he has to spend time stealing money n drugs with gay people, he'll spend time stealing money n drugs with gay people!! i guess 😭. he definitely will be using that time to side eye them tho 😭😭. The funny gay couple and the straight man (literally) doing stealing shenanigans.. smh. We were robbed 😭 from their robbing!!!!!!!! i wish we saw more of them (dont get it twisted from all the praise the wire gets, it does have its faults, every show does!).. got to explore them more! We barely get to see Brandon before he dies n we don't even get to see John bailey's end result! Just hear it passing by! SMH!!! they were a cute lil ragtag group and i wanted to see them successful!!! also.. just saying John but... if u stayed n had a threesome instead of going to see ur 'mom', you wouldve lived longer...... probably not that long when you've got avon n his muscle minions after u... but still. You missed out big time bro. It's time to consider switching sexuality sides, methinks !

AS CLOSING SINCE WE'RE RUNNIN A LIL LONG!!

🩵 gay ppl.. everywhere

🩵 The Baltimore fuzz can also be poly excluding kima as platonic <3. Herc n Carver have too many sus conversations to be just bros at this point ... but ill talk more abt them later probably! They're rlly cute tho! And bunk n McNulty have their buddycop banter that's very domestic and assholic because they are domestic assholes. Bunk made lester bow-legged. Bunk ALSO outside of police stuff, has some childhood lore with Omar, of all people. Perhaps Omar had a schoolgirl crush on THE JOCK bunkster, feared star of his... school's game with the stick or whatever lol it sounds cute though! I'll talk more abt the fuzzy side of the show if u want, but they're pretty big so ull see more of that for urself with less explanation needed if u watch it !

🩵 avon's barksdale crew could be a poly powercouple gang takeover !! As could marlo's! With obvious platonic pieces as snoop probably has her own gf n such. Wee-bey is just so beautiful he needs to be a bf!! he needs someone to listen to his fish facts!! Him and stringer probably trade fish facts n finance facts! Avon and his gang kiss <3

🩵 bodie/Wallace have some fans! The stubborn kid playing tough guy to survive trying to steel his heart and the smart kid who's a little too soft and a little too supportive.. it's sweet and sad :( .

🩵 Bodie n poot are cute too. The second coming of girlboss malewife. Lil Kevin had to be in a poly with them or smthin cus there's no other reason why they should keep him along 😭 he was so shit at being muscle. It's not even funny LOL. Poot was also kinda shitty at being muscle too. Lil spoon headass, desperately debilitatingly declining hairline headass. Fuckin poot 😭.. bodie rlly spent his whole life carrying the team tbh. No wonder he's always such a crabby Lil guy! Yall make him do too much! By the time he was 26, he felt 86 probably !!

🩵 there's also cutty n slim charles, n other people that show in the later seasons that i can address later in a reblog, but yea! So far those are my favs mentioned n can be elaborated later! thank u SO much 4 asking, this was SUPER fun n appreciated 🩵🩵🩵 i doubt many ppl will read this n i don't blame yall but TRY if u can.. to watch The Wire if ure ever bored n have some freetime!! it's so good 😭

[castle-dimitrescu]

Duke x Alcina hcs because I have neverending brainrot (and yes I actually ship this)

The duke ADORES Alcina so fucking much it's ridiculous

He can't help but admire her

They only use pet names. If they say each other's real names you know something is VERY wrong

Duke will BATHE Alcina in compliments

She just soaks up his love and smothers him in kisses

When they cuddle the duke just worships her every curve and imperfection

Her crow's feet and laugh lines make him MELT

He runs his hands up and down the curves of her hips over and over cus he just loves them so much

It's not even sexual admiration he just thinks her whole body is a masterpiece

Even the rolls of her belly when she sits down make him melt

"Darling if only I could do justice to your body by painting it, but unfortunately I don't have the hands of a god"

He finds new poetic ways to describe her beauty

She just adores it so much

She loves his chubby little cheeks so much

She loves cupping them in her hands and just gazing at him

She loves smothering his face in kisses

Cus whenever she does it he gets all red in the face and giddy with joy

He makes sure to use super good quality chapstick and lip balm so his lips are perfectly soft because "I need to make sure my lips are worthy of being kissed by a goddess"

He buys her GORGEOUS dresses and has them custom-tailored to her

She just absolutely spoiled by him

But don't worry she returns the favor

Cus they believe in gender equality >:3

She gives him tons of affection and kisses

She buys gorgeous smelling candles for him

She makes his FAVORITE wines and buys his favorite liquors

She sings to him and plays piano for him

They're very classy about their relationship tho

They keep public displays of affection to a minimum and you would never guess they were in love, just very respectful of each other

But when they're alone?

THEY LOVE BIRDS

The daughters have gotten used to it and even treat the duke like their dad

They call him "papa" "dad" even some goofy nicknames

Dani calls him "pug" cus he reminds her of a chubby pug

One of Alci's nicknames for him is "munchkin"

They behave a lot like Gomez and Morticia Adams

Just the purest most affectionate form of love

They love tasting wines together

He loves making her laugh

they love playing games together like poker or blackjack but mainly chess

cus they're both REAAAALLY good at it and they love trash-talking and flirting

sometimes they combine trash talk and flirting and the result is BIZARRE

it's so fun to watch them play chess tho cus they have the BEST comebacks

watching them play speed chess is fucking WILD

it's like watching a battle between two master boxers

but it's an intense battle of witts

they both speak TONS of different languages and they often speak to each other in them just cus they can

the duke's favorite is french and Italian

they also like learning dead or dying languages like Somali and Irish and old scots

Alcina serenades the duke in old french and Latin and it MELTS HIS HEART

there's also a song in Irish Gaelic called "Mo Ghille Mear" (my gallant hero) that Alcina loves singing for him cus it's just so fucking gorgeous

let's say they're in an au where they know about technology and video games

they love playing intellectual strategy games together

like civilization 6 is one of their faves

Alcina always chooses a cultural victory and the duke tries to go for a scientific victory

idk if any of yall know what the fuck I'm talking about but oh well lol

They also have a survival world on Minecraft together

They love building huge ornate builds together

like they have a home base that's a recreation of Castle Dimitrescu

Alcina does the bulk of the mining and hunting for resources and duke does the bulk of the building

I've exhausted myself from the excitement this gave me but I might post more hcs if yall like these. Hell, I might start doing those hc list things some blogs do where people send an ask requesting hcs for a ship. Hope you like these cus I shared them with a discord server and they loved them so much i just had to share them with you guys.

[thesunnyshow]

Name: Juliet

Writing Blog URL(s): @wonderlustlucas

Nationality: American

Languages: English, beginner level French, teeny tiny bit of Korean

Star Sign: Virgo

MBTI: ISFJ-T

Favorite color: Pastel yellow

Favorite food: My mom’s Sunday gravy

Favorite movie: Howl’s Moving Castle (The Lion King is a close second though)

Favorite ice cream flavor: Specifically Turkey Hill’s Double Dunker (get it— it’s so good)

Favorite animal: Humpback whale

Go-to karaoke song: She’s Kinda Hot by 5 Seconds of Summer

Dream job (whether you have a job or not): Neurosurgeon! Or a Twitch streamer HAHA

Coffee or tea? What are you ordering?  Ahhh probably coffee, I love tea but I need my coffee </3

If you could have one superpower, what would you choose? Shapeshifting! Clearly the superior superpower I don’t take constructive criticism.

If you could visit a historical era, which would you choose? This is weirdly specific, but I would love to be in Scotland during the 1700’s. Alternatively, the 1980’s.

If you could restart your life, knowing what you do now, would you? 100%. I know everything happens for a reason but getting a redo and being able to fix all the big mistakes I made would be pretty nice.

Would you rather fight 100 chicken-sized horses or one horse-sized chicken? One horse-sized chicken! 100 tiny horses would be crazy tiring.

If you were a trope in a teen high school movie, what would you have been? I would probably be the gay side character that gives good emotional advice but is hella lonely LMAO

Do you believe in aliens/supernatural creatures? Yes, both!

What are some small things that make your day better? Driving with the windows down and music blasting, picking up coffee, playing video games, & talking to my internet friends on Discord.

Fun fact about yourself that not everyone would know? I discovered my love for writing through Warrior Cats roleplay😭

What fandom(s) do you write for? Right now, only Kpop, but I wouldn’t mind writing for 5SOS or some of my other fandoms!

When did you post your first piece? On WattPad, December 2015. On Tumblr, April 2018 :)

Do you write fluff/angst/crack/general/smut, combo, etc? Why? I write everything! Fluff/smut/crack is my favorite and slight angst (usually just slow burn though cus I’m soft).

Do you write OCs, X Readers, Ships...etc? Again, I write anything and everything! Currently, second or third person reader inserts are my main style, but I also do ships and would love to write more OCs.

Why did you decide to write for Tumblr? Before Tumblr, I was on WattPad for different fandoms but eventually fell off. Then, when I got into Kpop in 2017, I found that urge to write again and decided to move to Tumblr since WattPad was becoming… weird. Plus Tumblr was a better fit for me!

What inspires you to write? To be completely honest, it’s the little things throughout the day that inspire me. For example, “Honey” was inspired by me not being able to open my locker in high school. “I Hemoglobin You” was based off my friend giving me a head rub while I was donating blood. Kpop idols just so happen to be my muses that I like to put into random moments of inspiration!

What genres/AUs do you enjoy writing the most? High school or college AUs are my favorite, along with some good ol’ friends to lovers slow burn. Angst isn’t my forte so I usually just stick to fluff, smut, and some crack. I haven’t written any but fantasy AUs are some of my favorites too! (RIP to my League of Legends AU that I started and haven’t touched in months.)

What do you hope your readers take away from your work? Just like other fanfiction authors inspire me, I hope some of my work inspires others. Considering fanfiction is free, there is so much out there to read and when I find a good story that inspires ME to write better, I’d love for my writing to do the same.

What do you do when you hit a rough spot creatively? 3 options: 1) Skip that scene and jump ahead to one I’m excited to write; 2) Erase what part I’m on and completely redo it; or 3) Drop it. The majority of my works usually take a few months to write as I will completely stop working on it until I find the right inspiration again. 

What is your favorite work and why? Your most successful? “Four” is definitely my favorite work. It’s one of my longer pieces and there was a lot of raw emotion in there on my end. I love the relationship between Hyunjin and the reader and especially love the ending. “Greatest Gift” for Chanyeol is my most successful, and one of my other favorites!

Who is your favorite person to write about? Easily Hwang Hyunjin. It’s so easy to place him in any of my works, and sometimes it’s a struggle to NOT write him. It sounds stupid but sometimes I really feel like I “know” him so being able to describe him physically and mentally is easy for me.

Do you think there’s a difference between writing fanfiction vs. completely original prose? Yes and no. Yes, because most of the time, fanfiction is totally original as well and requires just as much thought as a 400,000 word novel. No, because fanfiction uses a specific person as a muse.

What do you think makes a good story? Detail and realistic dialogue! Of course, everyone has their own style of writing, but detail is especially important to me. Sure, you can have a great plot, but having concise, detailed writing to get immersed into makes a story so much better. I also find realistic dialogue to be a big deal— I hate when teenage characters are speaking in deep analogies because, if we’re being honest, my daily language is 95% just “Bruh.” If you’re like me, I’d actually prefer realistic dialogue over anything else.

What is your writing process like? Process… yikes. Sometimes… I have a random thought and then I’m like… hell yeah let’s write that. I actually have no process. I don’t outline, I just start writing and keep writing until I’m finished. Then I’ll read it all over to make edits, then I’ll use the Read Aloud feature to catch any mistakes I missed, then I’ll run it through Grammarly before posting!

Would you ever repurpose a fic into a completely original story? Hm, maybe? In the future, possibly, but as of right now I wouldn’t use any of my fics to do so.

What tropes do you love, and what tropes can’t you stand? Oh, gosh, tropes. Gotta love them. Friends to lovers, enemies to lovers, stuck together (AKA forced to share a bed), and fake relationships are my favorites. They may be corny, but I also love truth or dare or 7 minutes in heaven games in fics cus… they’re just classics. Also love fics with a popular x shy pairing. I can’t say I dislike many tropes, but I definitely have a love/hate relationship with vampire and werewolf tropes because of how romanticized they are.

How much would you say audience feedback/engagement means to you? Hm, to be completely honest, only a little bit? I mainly write for myself, it’s like a guilty pleasure to just get all my thoughts and desires out, and then I just so happen to make it public on Tumblr. Nevertheless, receiving comments and asks actually make my day, and sometimes I still struggle to wrap my mind around people enjoying my writing! So, thank you to everyone who has ever left me a kind message, I truly appreciate it ♥

What has been one of the biggest factors of your success (of any size)? Getting involved! I think one of the best ways to grow is to join networks, which not only gives you the opportunity to share your work on a greater scale, but also allows you to make connections. Like real life, making connections and making friendships with other writers can play a huge role in growing as a writer and growing your account.

Do you think fanfic writers get unfairly judged? Yes :( As someone who’s involved with other fandoms, I’ve heard the way some people think of fanfiction and it’s really sad. People do not know how much goes into writing and just see it as cringey and disgusting when it’s just… not.

Do you think art can be a medium for change? Yes! In all its forms, art is something a creator can use to influence their audience (in a good way, hopefully).

Do you ever feel there are times when you’re writing for others, rather than yourself? Like I said in #40, I mainly write for myself. Even when I’m writing a request, chances are if I like the request enough I’m going to create a story out of it that fits my personal desires the most.

Do you ever feel like people have misunderstood you or your writing at times?  No! However, I’d still consider myself a small account and do not have TOO many works posted. But so far, I don’t think I’ve faced this problem :)

Do your offline friends/loved ones know you write for Tumblr? Only a few! My best friend Maggie is on Tumblr with me and only 2 of my other pals know I write fanfiction.

What is one thing you wish you could tell your followers? How much I love each and every one of them for supporting me and sticking around even when I won’t post for months🥺❤️

Do you have any advice for aspiring writers who might be too scared to put themselves out there? Don’t psych yourself out! In the time I’ve spent on Tumblr, I’ve never received any substantial hate. My main advice is don’t write fanfiction to get popular on the app, write fanfiction because you love to write and love your muses!

Are there any times when you regret joining Tumblr? No, as much as Tumblr can be annoying at times, I love the people I’ve met and the content I’ve found and wouldn’t have wanted to use any other platform.

Do you have any mutuals who have been particularly formative/supportive in your Tumblr journey? @pinktea99 — Mo, you’ve been around since the beginning honestly, and without you I wouldn’t have been able to come out of my shell! Thank you for all your love & support & for being my SF9 buddy❤️

Pick a quote to end your interview with: 

“Like mate, stop procrastinating.” — 3RACHA

BONUS ROUND: K-POP CONFIDENTIAL 

[scorpiosanssexy]

hey can i get a haikyuu roommate matchup I'm a ENFP-A Sagittarius/Griffyndor house . I am quite energetic other times i can be quite quiet as well which is rare but i love dance and goof around making other people laugh is one of my hobbies . I'm naturally competitive my favorite sports are volleyball and tennis. I see myself as extremely sensitive as well but i don't like opening up to people :) Thank you i love your posts

t3Im actually an early riser i wake up at most around 8 am or even 7 am . I love cooking but mainly baking i rather bake than cook . as much i like being around people im sociable i need a lot of me time just because i also feel anxious around large groups i stick to a small friend group that i feel comfortable around. People describe me very laid back when i want to be ofc  I dont know if this helps at all but i have aries rising with a libra moon alongside my sagittarius sun

----

Dear User,

congratuations, we have found you a potential roommate. We have throughly looked through your application and we hope you are happy with your result. Below this post are the details about them

Your Sincerely

The Accomodation Team 

Name: Tanaka Ryunosuke

Birthday: 3rd March (Pisces)

MBTI: ESTP

oh lordy what i have i done, with your energetic energy and tanaka’s hot headedness you too are a force to be reckowned with

because you are both gyffindoors you are both very mischevious, you and him (sometimes noya too) team up and prank everyone, whilst tanaka cannot keep a secret to save his life susprisely most of your pranks are successful

well i did say you guys were a force to be reckowend with

asahi is the best victim hands down his reactions are priceless

you three once tried to prank Daichi and let’s just say you have never seen noya and tanaka so terrifed in their lives

tanaka peed himself#

anyway tanka loves the fact you love to dance and goof around

he believes life is too short so you might as well have some fun

because of your love of dancing you always drag tanaka into playing just dance with you

whilst you are slaying it, tanaka can never keep in time with the person

yes he is a dad dancer

noya is the person on the screen like that boi has a set of dance moves

tanaka always insists that he has to be the certain icon (the hotdog one) has it is his good luck charm

tanaka sweetie you haven’t won a single game

he loves the fact you want to see others smiling as someone who also shares this trait with you I think it can get really over looked but Tanaka thinks is what makes you such a lovely person and the best roomie too

Now someone call mr competitive because this boy loves any competion

everything around the house turns into a competition, who can dust the fastest pays for dinner to who can hold a handstand for the longest

noya is the judge lol

Now the fact you are just as into volleyball is amazing

he loves it when he can practice his spikes with you

you, him, noya and ennoshita go to the park to play volleyball with eachother at the weekends and sometimes you guys end up doing a 4 v 4

your little foursome are renowned for being the park volleyball champs

now you have tried to teach tanaka tennis, the key word is tried

yeah he cannot play to save his life but you guys have loads of fun and just goof about (as someone who also plays tennis i love you for this)

ennoshita on the other hand, he is really good at tennis, like he is looking fine

now you may be thinking that tanaka isn’t the most tactile person in the world and you are 100% right

but as a fellow ENFP i know all i want when i am upset is fun and hugs

which is something tanaka is very good at

when ever you are feeling down he will give you this great big bear hug

tanaka may not be patient but he is understanding and incrediable loyal to his friends so he doesn’t mind if you don’t want to talk about your problems instead he is just going to alls be there for you no matter what chaotic dumb things you do

thank goodness you are an early riser because if end of the world would happen tanaka would just sleep through it

like he is also snoores haha

you get the pots and pans and start clanging them to get him awake

you: I haven’t got some sleep because of y’all now you’re not gonna get some sleep because of me

that’s why you both make a great team lol

him and noya worship the ground you walk on when it comes to your baking

like a pretty person making us lots of food sign them up

but in serious these two will be your ultimate hype men

you ever feel down these too will make you blush so much from the compliments they give you

Tanaka understands that sometimes you feel anxious so him and yuu have devised the perfect plan in introducing their teammates one at a time so you don’t feel scared with a group of toll boys all staring at you

kageyama accidentally scared you once and tanaka was all up in that boy’s grill

BOY HAVE YOU LOST YOU MIND CUS I’LL HELP YOU FIND IT

also the fact that you have an aries rising makes you a bad bitch on the outside but your libra moon makes you a soft bitch on the inside

which is the aesthetic tanaka lives for

Overall, you have a energetic, caring but slightly hot-headed roommate

Other Potential Matches: Nishinoya Yuu and Oikawa Tooru

i hope you liked your result and thank you for your patience

Carla

[ithadtobethemoon]

So how do you know get embarrassed by things? Like I want to make a TikTok but I just get super anxious about people making fun of me. My first video ever got 140 views in less than a day (not that it’s a lot but that’s how bad my anxiety is) and I freaked out and deleted it lmao. I don’t know why I just started imagining people talking shit and laughing at me. But it was kind of fun making it and I want to not not give a shit what people think. Do you have any advice?

Hey babe, I relate a lot mainly cus I have bad body dsymporhia as a result from my disease/tumor. I hid for years. like didn't post anything on social media. didn't go out with friends. I didn't even want to go to the store I was so uncomfortable with the thought of being seen by anyone. It's been a long ass fucking journey but I slowly started going out & posting selfies again. Honestly I talked to my friends about it a lot & they would encourage me to go out despite my social anxiety. & they always gas me up lol. but mostly it was me forcing myself to just fucking do it bc life is literally so short & at some point you just have to get fed up enough with holding yourself back. There were & still are times where I post & delete soon after bc it freaks me out. Or even going out still terrifies me. Or I stare at a picture until I don't even know what I look like anymore. but lately I try to post just bc in that moment I'm happy & confident & that's all that matters. if you think you just made the funniest tik tok post that shit. As long as it brings you joy keep doing it. It's ok if it takes time to warm up to posting though, & it's ok if you delete & reupload a few times. you have to get used to putting yourself out there bc it is scary I get it. Ease your way into it 💕 Try to break down the root of your fears. Imagine worst case scenario. & imagine what would happen & how you would work through it. I used to do that for situations where I had social anxiety like for interviews & it would help me. Once you wrote down worst case scenario & broke it all down it didn't seem as scary as we make it out to be in our heads. Idk I hope this helps. I'll try & find the templete for working through your fears I use sometimes & add it to this if I can.

[the-lupine-sojourner]

Takara Yamada’s Hero Academia Bonus Chapter 1 [Eijiro Kirishima/OC] [Female!Aizawa/Hizashi]

So! I read This post by @bnha-imagines-grill and (of COURSE!) my brain went full fanfic and out come this. I am so sorry, BNHA-Imagines-Grill! If you want, I will delete this! I just couldn’t help it!! Also tagging @elite-guard-hardygal cus I wanna surprise you for a change, lolz. 

Also, @dailyojiromashirao is the BIGGEST sweetheart ever and I love them so much!! My phone was being stupid last night when I posted this, and I forgot to tag you then, and it wouldn’t save it when I went back and tried, so not I’m doing it on my laptop.

Anyway, I hope you all enjoy and feel free to send an ask with requests for more Bonus Chapters! I’d love to try it out! Now, onto the story!

God Bless and Good Day! 

~The Lupine Sojourner

(Wowie is that a huge GIF I picked. Sorry!)

It was an accident, really.

I should have known not to get so careless while trying to dance as I practiced making shapes with my Quirk. But here I was, having a lot of fun and getting careless.

It was really fun, but I’d danced too close to the table and broke a cup, luckily full of water, so it was easy to clean up the spilled liquid. I am panic-stricken as the seconds tick by before scrambling to scoop the pieces up.

In my haste, I got a decent-sized chunk of glass rammed into my hand. I somehow keep my outburst to an extremely loud hiss. It hurt!!

Blood started seeping out of the gash and onto the floor, where I tried to mop it up with a nearby hand towel, but ended up accidentally jostling the shard and causing both another loud hiss and more blood on the floor. I just sink to the floor and sob, the pain ramping up as the tiny puddle of blood grows.

Suddenly, I’m being picked up and carried to the sink, and I was so focused on my pain and the panic of having broken something not two weeks into my stay with the Yamadas that I didn’t realize just who it was at first.

Mr. Yamada himself; he’d stayed home again to watch me. He’d been so nice to me. He’s gonna be so mad I broke his cup! I mean, he hadn’t said it outright, but I was most likely not allowed to use my Quirk indoors, right? Like at the orphanage? So I was in even more trouble for that! I sat there as he put my hand under warm water, silent (a rare thing where he’s concerned.) and thoughtful. “Are you okay?” He asks. “Gashes can be serious and pretty scary.” I blink. What?

“I...yeah...but...I…” He smiles, adding a little soap to the gash and gently rubbing it in. I grimace, hissing in pain. Maybe this was my punishment; having the wound cleaned with soap.

“You what?” Hizashi coaxes, wrapping gauze on it after attaching butterfly stitches to keep it closed. “That’ll do for now.” He notes, smiling. This was weird. He should be mad. I broke the rules! “It should last for a while, but I’ll change it before you go to bed, okay?” I nod, unable to speak, let alone look him in the eye.

“I broke the glass!” I squeak suddenly, forcing myself to own up to my mistake. Maybe he’d go easier if I confess... “I didn’t mean to, Mr. Yamada! Honest! I was just playing, and I was using my Quirk and I’m so sorry! I know I was bad and- -” I break off and hiccup and wipe my eyes as more tears flow, “and I know I shouldn’t have used my Quirk and I’m really really sorry, Mr Yamada! I promise I won’t do it ever again!” I was so terrified of being kicked out or punished, I could only sit there, quacking. Mr. Yamada can only stare at me for several seconds.

Probably deciding the best punishment. 

When he reaches out, I instinctively flinch away before halting. I had to accept my punishment, after all.. He gently draws me into his lap and I am stunned to see tears going down his cheeks. Were they mad tears? Was he upset cus I happened to break a glass that meant a lot to him? I sit in his lap, stunned, then he draws me in for a tight hug. “You dear, sweet, sweet child.” He whimpers into my hair. “Never, ever promise not to use your Quirk again, okay?” He continues, drawing back to grip my chin softly in his fingers, making me look at him. He looks so serious and sad. I wonder why. “Takara, please listen to me very carefully; never be afraid to use your Quirk, inside, outside, or even for amusement. I am not, nor will I ever be, mad at you, I promise. Let’s clean the glass up together, though, okay?” I can only nod, sniffling and following him. Luckily, it was a hardwood floor, so it was a simple matter of moving the water to the sink and holding the dustpan on my end (after Mr. Yamada carried me to my room to grab my pair of flip-flops; he had weird banana slippers on) as Mr. Yamada swept the glass into it, then grabbed a cereal box. “When cleaning up glass, it’s important to be very careful and very thorough, okay? Or you’ll end up with gashes on your hand and glass on the floor.” He smiles, nudging my side as he closes up the box and puts it in the trash can. I nod, squirming a little in guilt. But, I guess, if teasing was my only punishment, I could take it. “There. You always put the broken glass in a box or other container, alright? That way, it doesn’t destroy the trash bag.” He opens his arms again and I am still so relieved he wasn’t mad that I run into his arms. “Tik-Tak, you know I love you, right?” He’d said it a few times, but don’t adults usually say that to kids that are with them? That they’re watching? I nod. He seemed to really mean it...and he said I could call him by a different name...

“I love you, too...Otōsan.” I reply slowly. It was true. I did really like living with them and Mr. Yamada was super nice! Plus, he had said that I could call him Otōsan, so it must be okay, right?

Of course, Mrs. Yamada was amazing, too, but she wasn’t here. I’d have to tell her I love her when she gets back, maybe even finally call her Kāsan. Mr. Yamada grins in utter happiness and hugs me tight, wiggling in elation on the ground.

“Awww, Tik-Tak!” He squeals, then ruffles my hair. “Thanks. Now, how about you show me what you were doing? I wanna see!” I blush and stammer as I try to think of a reason not to. It was just some stupid dancing with water! It wasn’t important or interesting! But...the look on Otōsan’s face was too much and I eventually nod. I then turn the faucet on just enough to get water and begin. I make different shapes and twirl and dance, finding that joy from before I broke the glass again. He claps and watches me, laughing. I laugh, too, surprised when Otōsan joins me.

We dance together for a while before Otōsan suggests dinner.

=#=#=#=#=

Kāsan arrives later that night, when I’m supposed to be going to bed. However, I’d told myself that I’d tell her myself about the glass and how Otōsan handled it, letting her decide what to do now. So I walk out.

“-ta, I just...she looked so scared! It was just a stupid glass, but she was convinced that she was in a lot of trouble, and when she told me she didn’t think she was allowed to use her Quirk, I froze up! I’d been in that position too many times when I was her age, and, seeing it repeated, in our kid to boot, I just- -I just froze and she sat there shaking! She was so sure I was going to- -I’m not sure what she thought I was going to do, so I just hugged her and made her promise not to be afraid of using her Quirk ever again. I promised her I wouldn’t get mad.” I tentatively peek around the corner, scared of being noticed, but curious. I see Kāsan hugging Otōsan, rubbing his back.

“Hizashi, you can’t blame yourself. The girl lost her parents, and I saw the way that orphanage was run; the children were left to themselves under a few stricts rules, mainly against using their Quirks inside, but they weren’t supposed to use them in general. It was part of the reason why I was so eager to get her out of there.”

“I hated that look on her face! I hated that I made her look that way!” Otōsan sobs, clinging tighter to Kāsan’s shirt. Kāsan continues rubbing her back. I just stood there, stunned. Otōsan felt like he was responsible for the way I reacted? How was he to blame?!

“Love, it wasn’t you.” Kāsan insists. “It was the idiots running the orphanage. They don’t know the first thing about raising super-powered children, despite all the research done on the subject. Hizashi, you didn’t do this. Idiots did.” I can’t just watch and listen anymore and decide to come out, tears welling in my eyes.

“Otōsan…” I whimper, wiping my eyes and sniffling. “It wasn’t you!” I insist. “I just...I saw what happened to kids that broke the rules at the orphanage. They...they were locked in a closet and left there! If it was really bad, they were put in a different orphanage. I didn’t mean to make you sad!” I sob and run to give him a hug. He’s stunned.

“Wh-what are you doing up, Musume?” He asks softly, wrapping his arms around me instinctively.

“I wanted to talk to Kāsan, and I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but…” I squeeze him. “I didn’t want you to feel bad anymore!” Otōsan hugs me back. If I had looked, I would have seen a rare full smile on Kāsan’s face.

“Your parents were right to name you ‘treasure’, Musume.” He murmurs, choking up with emotion. I giggle.

“Otōsan, you’re being silly.” I tease. Kāsan comes over and joins in the hug.

“No, he’s right, Musume.” She says, chuckling. “Please, tell us if you feel like you can’t use your Quirk again. It isn’t true at all. At least, not in or around the house. At school, you have to obey their rules, but Hizashi and I want to help you with your Quirk. You’ve got very impressive control so far, and we can help you grow even stronger! How about it?” I nod eagerly.

“That sounds perfect!” And from that day on, it was Quirk training in the evenings after dinner, followed by a bit of TV time, then bedtime. I went to bed every night tired, but very happy that my new parents loved me and were helping me advance my Quirk.

It was a great new life I had. I wouldn’t trade it for the world!

[theonemadwolf]

I'm being SO normal about this new guy.

Just.

EXCESSIVELY normal.

I didn't have a panic attack today because he's taking a long time to get back to me about an ask i made about setting up a phone call. cus I realized with this cold i probs shouldn't see him for awhile because we both have high risk family members.

Like. I'm so so so normal about this.

I'm not scared about a possible rejection after spending almost a year in a friendship with someone who'd just outright refuse simple asks like that without any accommodation or finding a middle-ground.

Like, i know my anxiety is my problem at the end of the day. But i also know, after extensive therapy, that's it's ok to ask for some accommodation from those that care about you. Tom made me go so many paces back from all the work i did getting myself better about asking for help.

Like, cus this is so new with this new guy, i don't want him to feel this pressure. But, i also don't want to destroy myself to keep him from it??

Honestly,

I'm just so confused. I never wanted dating experience, because I didn't think i'd ever want to be in this kind of relationship. So i didn't entirely pay attention to the couple's around me, esp because no one in my family has been healthy enough, ever, to maintain a romantic relationship. So all i was learning from them was what Not to do.

But now that i found someone i want to be in this kind of relationship with, I'm scrambling through my memories trying to piece together what should be happening here. Like. Is this too fast?? Too slow?? Am i being too affectionate or needy? He seems to really like me, for me, and has already been really encouraging honesty. but maybe i misread that, and i went too far somehow???

Like.... Fuck.

I've ALWAYS messed with systems. I Love fucking around with normals. Knowing the normals here wouldn't be me trying to mimic all of that, because I don't work like that. But, at least i'd have a frame of reference of what I'm doing, or knowledge of when I was actively being unusual.

I'm basically THIS close to sending a mass text to all the people in my life in happy relationships (spoiler: it's 3 people) to get advice. So, since that'd be a dead-end before it began, I'm legitimately turning this post into an open invitation to my followers to throw whatever sage (or not sage) advice into the comments or my DM's. Even if it's telling me i'm being a dumbass. I'm mainly using this as a tool for distraction, cus that's what my therapist suggested.

But, I would genuinely appreciate any like, insights, or different perspectives, or even stories about past or present relationships. I reeeally don't want this to fall on him, like, quizzing him on past partners and how it usually works. Cus that feels like the wrong kind of weird.

I'm also trying DESPERATELY not to write him off, cus the unfortunate thing with a brain that's been impacted by a lot by childhood trauma (that didn't end in childhood), and having been in one too many extremely abusive relationships (just because they weren't romantic doesn't make the shit i faced with these past friends less palpable--thank you therapy), my line between sitting with anxiety and confusion, and cutting my losses and bouncing, is very thin.

Which. I like this guy. I don't plan on doing that. So. Basically just throwing a pebble into the void with this post. seeing if i get any ripples back, y'know?

*

[avicebro]

Hello Pollux! Can you explain your OTP tags?

This is something people want? Lol okay:

This includes League of Legends and Fate.

Fate:

otp: be my queen | richard/ayaka

reference to the fact that richard is continuously trying to get ayaka to be his master. since they are master/servant and i like them romantically it turns from “be my master” to “be my queen”. a good otp 10/10 narita when will you ever.

otp: avenger and ruler | edmond dantes/amakusa shirou 

i hope this is obvious. it’s an avenger and a ruler. demonstrates the fact that they’re polar opposites but still good as a ship.

otp: dragon slayers | siegfried/saint george

reference to how they work really well together in defeating wyverns in fate/grand order. may include kojiro if i find some siegfried/kojiro art i like.

otp: thief and executioner | robin hood/charles henri sanson

i like these two, especially in the salem chapter. the ship name is reference to their roles: one is a thief, one is an executioner. i was also thinking of giving them a title like “the new fruk” cause that’s basically what they are lol.

otp: im a self insert | guda/fgo character

any art of a guda and a fate grand order character. mainly avicebron and dantes because that’s who i ship myself with. more characters may join eventually but im very gay.

otp: casters of opposing factions | avicebron/william shakespeare

in apocrypha they’re the casters for the opposing factions. in fate grand order they seem to keep this dislike for each other.

otp: a new isolde | tristan/melt

ok i haven’t seen the full ccc event yet but basically tristan compares melt to isolde so yeah she’s a new isolde for him. i don’t like how fate writes her name (isseult?) so we’re going with this spelling.

otp: i’ll make you tsar | kadoc/anastasia

this is kadoc’s plan in lostbelt, to make her tsar of the lostbelt. that doesn’t really happen though but they’re in love okay?????

otp: hate at first sight | kirei/kiritsugu

i was tempted to call them “beautiful ties” as a pun on their names but decided against it. hate at first sight because that’s what happened. get along you two.

otp: president and princess | rin/issei

their roles at school. proud captain of the rissei ship. i will love this ship by myself if i have to.

otp: like cats and dogs | gilgamesh/cu chulainn

this is because of ip. go through her gilcu tag. i swear you’ll come out a different person. gilcu is a good ship. they’re a cat and a dog.

otp: i hate everything you stand for | hansa/jester

hansa and jester both hate each other because of who they are. jester despises those from the church, hansa hates dead apostles. they’re fun.

otp: l’auteur malfaisant | edmond dantes/dumas

this is just what dantes calls him, “the wicked author” but in french. love these two so fucking much. if you want me to be happy just mention eddumas.

otp: beast like me | caren/angra mainyu

in hollow ataraxia, it’s stated that they are both beasts: caren for being born “out of wedlock” and angra mainyu because he’s all the evils of the world. they are both beasts by birth, and must deal with the sins from being called a beast. also a big otp.

otp: sad a lot | tristan/lancelot

i was originally calling this ship “tristalot” which sounds like “triste a lot” which is french for “sad a lot”.

otp: up until this moment my wish was being granted | medea/souichirou

OTP TO RULE ALL OTPS. god i love these two. it’s a reference to what medea says in UBW when she dies. man i love these two so much.

otp: the jewel resting near my heart | rin/shirou

reference to the pendent rin gives shirou. may include rin/archer i’m not sure yet.

otp: let’s destroy the world! | kirei/gilgamesh

wow this is late on the list lol. the ship name is what they wanna do. kirei route when nasu.

otp: on the defense | hector/alter cu chulainn

both of them are known for being defensive characters, both in playstyle and in personality. they’re old, tired men let them nap.

otp: i may not always be by your side | issei/shirou

this is a line issei tells shirou in prillya. love these guys a lot. especially with rin.

otp: sword and sheath | saber/shirou

that’s what they are. saber is the sword and shirou is the sheath. no sexual jokes please. like them romantically and as friends.

otp: my wish is for her to live | medusa/sakura

purple girlfriends. love them. love heaven’s feel. reference to a line medusa tells shirou.

otp: my superman | sakura/shirou

OTP TO RULE ALL OTPS. the best ship in stay night with kuzucaster. i love heaven’s feel so much. they were what got me into drawing. i love them so much. reference to the superman scene in HF.

otp: two too pretty boys | diarmuid/gilgamesh

this is 100% because they are attractive guys. that is it. the ship name shows this.

otp: you cursed me | emiya alter/kiara

don’t @ me i like these two. emiya alter an alter because of kiara, hence the ship name.

otp: you were literally made for me | gilgamesh/enkidu

I DON’T HATE THIS SHIP WHY WOULD I TAG AND REBLOG IT SO MUCH IF I HATED THIS SHIP? I simply stated that I am tired of seeing it so much in the f/sf tags. I do like these two shhh. name is a reference to the fact that kidu was made for gil.

otp: lance to the heart and you’re to blame | kirei/cu chulainn

hello i love kotoyari. reference to the UBW ending. feb 14 isn’t valentines day it’s kotoyari day.

otp: your dream is mine | kiritsugu/irisviel

i can’t talk about this ship without crying just know i love them. iri wishes for his dream to come true.

otp: i wanted a saber anyways | rin/saber

just gals being pals you know . and originally rin wanted a saber.

otp: the woman was a saint | kirei/claudia

im not crying you’re crying. a line in the VN.

otp: you remind me of someone | paracelsus/phantom

no this isn’t just because they’re pretty boys lol. like the idea of them being good friends who help each other when the other goes berserk. 

otp: dancing with the devil | mephistopheles/paracelsus

there’s a lot of cool/interesting ship art between these two that’s really cool and i love. love the idea of them adopting jack. 

otp: fist of the north star to the heart | saint martha/sasaki kojiro

just wait until the summer event. love how koji has joined the dragon slayer’s group. hope he enjoys his new friends. you have to fight her at one point for koji’s development. it’s a joke about how her np is a fist of the north star joke.

otp: calm desert nights | nitocris/scheherazade 

reference to lalalack’s ‘desert beauty’ piece. they spend those nights in the desert exchanging stories, calming each other down. 

otp: how about we put it to the test? | li shuwen/beowulf

what beowulf says to li shuwen before they start their fight. they like to beat each other up and it’s great. 

otp: beat up a pretty face | beowulf/fionn mac cumhaill

who has the pretty face is up to you. reference to how fionn looks ephemeral in the beofionn art.

otp: a king and his knight | diarmuid/fionn

it’s their roles. yeah i know fionn “killed” him it’s fun. 

my chivalrous knight | diarmuid/saber

who is the knight and who is chivalrous? up to you!

otp: blue knights | cu chulainn/saber

only two people ship this there’s only two posts i wanna die

a queen and her knight | saber/irisviel

based on when saber acts as her knight (aka all of fate/zero) in f/z. doesn’t have otp cause i’m lazy. 

ot3: church trio | gilgamesh/kirei/cu chulainn

they live in the church lol.

ot3: we could have had it alllllll | sieg/jeanne d’arc/astolfo

based on the fact that apocrypha could have easily juggled the three of these into an ot3 but nope.

ot3: my two friends | gilgamesh/enkidu/kirei

there is only 1 piece of fanart in this tag but it’s a very good piece of fanart

ot3: this could have worked really well tbqh | kirei/gilgamesh/tokiomi

team archer could have been good if kirei didn’t get his dick sucked by gilgamesh.

ot3: princess president and prince | rin/issei/shirou

their roles - i think shirou should be a prince. i just really love rissei and shissei so why not combine them into an ot3 y/y?

group tag: aesthetic of death | gilles de rais, uryuu ryuunosuke, jeanne alter, prelati

i love these guys a lot okay? a lot of gilles/ryu because canon otp. was supposed to be art of death because of ryuunosuke's CE but it was mistranslated and i'm too lazy to change it!

group tag: equipe francaise | d’eon, marie, mozart, sanson 

they are cute but this tag is pushed by my thirst for mozart. the tag means “french team” which is basically what they are right?

brotp: my retainer | waver velvet/alexander the great

im sorry i can’t ship this romantically but they are cute together!

brotp: troy's defense | penthesilea, hektor

these two are good bros who break pots together and will rip achilles' open

League of Legends:

otp: spin to win | katarina/garen

this is about gameplay. garen is known for his e, which is a spin. the joke “spin to win” comes from that ability. since katarina also has a spin, spin to win works for these two.

otp: drasona | draven/sona

it’s just their ship name lol.

otp: takes two to tango | evelynn/twisted fate

reference to the twisted fate and evelynn shared tango skins. such a good ship. i love them and twisted fate/graves. league of legends please do something with these two i stg.

otp: partners in crime | twisted fate/graves

man this is the best lol ship man i wish lol would do anything with this ship that would be great i love my gay men. and they’re working together again! nice!

otp: the sun shines for you | leona/pantheon

i don’t know what lol is doing with these two if if they’re actually gonna be together and i love diana/leona too but i’ve always had a soft spot for these two. also? a great bot lane if you can stomp early. 

otp: it’s called art | jinx/jhin

to be honest i just think these two would be hilarious. let them just do whatever they want in piltover. 

otp: collecting souls | thresh/kalista

aesthetic and also a great botlane. i just love kalista tbh. ghost wife. 

otp: trying to keep the balance | shen/zed

wow the first otp for league of legends. good shit guys hope you guys get more content soon. 

If a ship you know I like is not on this list it’s probably just tagged as the ship name! I’m probably going to go through and create tags for each ship like these as I think of them. If you have suggestions for ship names let me know! 

[0225pm]

hello!

ok idk if i should actually like create a separate blog for personal posts since this blog is mainly for han’s viewing pleasure but then again, its such a hassle to keep up with another blog so i thought ah wtheck, i’m just post everything here la hahaha whenever i feel like writing something. 

so yesterday, i didn’t have much plans for the day so i was basically free the whole friday. dayah at the last minute asked me out to accompany her collect some speaker thing for one of her event jobs for the upcoming month and since i have nothing to do at home and would much rather be out walking and burning calories (i’ll talk about this part later) i thought, ok sure why not.

so i took a quick shower, got dressed and did some light makeup. yes, your girl still isn’t confident enough to go anywhere far without at least putting on some foundation to cover them nasty scars haha but ok so i prepped and shit and met her at the bus stop. we were gonna head to aljunied and she suggested taking the bus to bedok so i said are you sure? cus i think it’s much nearer if we take towards eunos. but since the bus was already right in front of us we ended up just boarding it to bedok anyway.

so upon reaching bedok mrt station, i looked at the map and pointed out to her that it was really much nearer if we actually took the train from eunos (it was about 2 stops if i’m not wrong) but ah well, the rice has become porridge HAHAHHAAH. ok then we went to aljunied, and towards this ulu office area. i’ve actually been there with her before once, so this was my 2nd time and i guess i’m quite familiar with the area already la hahaha. i never follow blindly ok. 

i had to wait for quite some for her to be done cus the person was explaining something to her. it was kinda awkward standing there but the people going in and out of the tiny office space didn’t really seem to mind so that was good, i guess. i was also perspiring a little in the office wtf. it didn’t even feel like there was any aircon at all. but i wasn’t complaining about it la cus if i were to wait and stand outside it’s gonna be even hotter. the weather is really shitty wtf.

initially the plan was collect speaker > go see doctor > she goes to the bazaar with her classmates while i go home. cus like i said, i just wanted to get out of the house and walk so i was fine with going home early since i at least already get to walk a bit for the day. but unfortunately, the doctor didn’t have an afternoon session for fridays so she ended up cancelling on her class outing and then she suggested ok why not we go to the bazaar after seeing the doctor? so i said sure i’m cool. cus i haven’t been to the bazaar yet and since it was past the break fast timing, i thought ah pretty sure it’s not gonna be that crowded la hahahahaha (i was wrong lmao)

it was so fucking crowded but tbh, wasn’t as bad as last year. and i tried to be at peace with myself cus apparently when you’re peaceful you won’t really feel the heat but lol it was hard trying to brainwash yourself especially while standing in front of strong lighting that’s emitting heat haha but ok la both of us survived the heat and i didn’t complained a lot about perspiring so yay achievement? :-) 

before we left, we got the bucket of meatballs and fries to share and then she went to get some keropok lekor for her family. i also bought like 2 sticks of cheese hotdogs along the way home.

oh and as i was saying, i’m burning calories cus i’m trying to lose some weight. in fact, i’m on some sort of stupid irregular diet regimen right now. i say irregular cus i don’t stick to the right timings to eat lmao hahaha. also the main reason why i’m on this stupid unhealthy way of dieting is because i need to lose as much weight and physical body fat as much as possible within 2 weeks to fit into my dress. i bought a dress off asos and i thought ah, i think i’m a uk14. i usually wear uk14-16 for clothing on asos and i thought to myself i think this dress will definitely be able to fit me just fine since it looks loose fitting but lol my package arrived and i tried on the dress but i couldn’t zip it up 100% lmao it was too tight and i think the moment i sit down it’ll probably burst or something sigh. i have such a broad back :( i think it’s mainly bc the dress isn’t made of the usual jersey material that’s slight stretchable so i overestimated my own size lmao hahahah anyway it sucks to be me right now cus i’m trying not to consume too much carbs. tbh, i’m trying to stick to a 700-800 calories diet per day which is like one meal per day? but it’s really unhealthy and i don’t want to go back to the old me eating sweet potatoes for a week to the point where i felt really weak and lethargic. my skin was yellow and pale and i look so sickly wtf. my hair was also falling out more than usual. and i really really really don’t wanna go back on that route so i’m trying out this stupid diet i found that apparently IU did for 3 days. except mine is gonna have to last for 2 weeks which is why i tweak the food she consumed a little.

she has an apple for breakfast, 1 sweet potato for lunch and 1 protein shake for dinner.

but since i’m not gonna be doing this for only 3 days i cannot go into starvation mode so quickly or else my body is gonna go crazy (been there done that - rmbr the sweet potato diet? hahaha i did lose like 2 inches off my waist though doing that diet).

so what i do is:

i still have 1 apple per day. lunch or the “main” meal of the day will be something that has some carbs but not rice or noodles to sub the sweet potato (my sweet potatoes has gone rotten and i haven’t went out to buy any new ones). if i really want rice or noodles or bread, max is 2 mouthfuls. dinner would be protein milk+whey or chocolate soymilk to make up for the lack of glucose (yes hahha i need some glucose to sustain me)

if not then i’ll switch them up, like maybe protein based food for lunch like chicken and fish and then dinner would be soymilk.

basically limiting my intake of sugar and carbs la hahahaha fuck its only the 2nd day and i want to die. 

[fatouseckcreates]

Hello Brave New World!

Guys! Don’t worry, this has nothing to do with the famous novel Brave New World by Aldous Huxley. Hey 11th grade required reading! I have no recollection of what it was about. But I do know that returning from Dakar to NY definitely shook up my little world. And absolutely demanded of me some much needed bravery.  As I’m forced to reintroduce myself into my post-Covid panicked communities, dance, family, friends etc, folks are asking me a lot of the same questions, mainly “How was Senegal?!” And truthfully I draw a blank every time because how do I sum up an entire year and a half AND make it sound like good clean fun, you know my brand lol. I usually land on some version of “Yes, it was great! So much fun!” And it was fun! but it was also entire 16 months of living in the real world, as opposed to some 16 day vacation bubble. 

So upon checking in with myself I asked myself, “Self, how WAS Senegal?” Because my mind, whew! She is powerful y'all, but she is selectively forgetful! Sometimes she only wants to remember what's pleasant, and bearable, conveniently forgetting the uncomfortable, the unpleasant. I want to remember it all. The ugly, the amazing, the awful, the triumphs, the joy of living it all! When I think of Senegal I equate it with peace. It literally hurts to leave my family behind. There is no denying Senegal has my heart. But to cheat myself out of everything I learned, everything I emerged from would be a disservice to myself. So I started jotting down some things Senegal taught me, not just in 2019-20 but since the beginning of this crazy ride. 

1. Senegal taught me to love my inner baddie. Sangse REK!

One of the first things I immediately fell in love with, and that most people fall in love with, the fashion, the art of it all. The regality of the clothes. Specifically the women, old and young, babies, everyone is so gorgeous. You have your daytime/walking around the house fit, casual gorgeous. Going to the market?oh this old thing? Gorgeous! Going to see your granny, GORGEOUS! I loved the idea of getting dressed up to sit and eat and talk and do nothing in particular because YOU are the main event. I am the main event! Because I’m gorgeous and you know it you see it! Every time I got new clothes I put more intent intentional into wearing things outside of my comfort zone. Why not? I was already being catapulted up out my comfort zone in every other way. So what good reason had I not try different styles, different colors, different fabrics, that would otherwise feel like “no this is too much.” Senegal said Fatou, “Are you even doing enough?” Do you know what it does to a person’s confidence to see yourself everyday and just be in awe, that YOU are so comfortable being this extra version of your already amazing self. Its wonderful. And when you look around the room, to your right and your left, everyone else is feeling themselves too! Because you are a room full of beautiful, confident people just enjoying being alive and being apart of a community. 

2. Senegal taught me to ask a lot of questions. 

And know that everyone who gives you an answer doesn't always know what they’re talking about, so keep asking. For someone who is very “I’ll figure it out or I’ll forget about it” minded, this took a little bit of practice getting used to! And while I definitely needed assistance because sometimes when you’re out on the road the knowledge you left home with is not enough. Its ok to speak up and say excuse me ma’am, sir, etc, I’m looking for xyz, do you know where I can find it? It actually takes a load off lol. And for someone whois not fluent, and not always feeling confident about my language skills this was something I absolutely needed to get more comfortable getting around on my own, and feeling safe around the city.

It also wisened me to the fact that many people will give you a nice strong confident answer, without an ounce of hesitation, and be dead wrong. So check your facts with a trusted source, or just be prepared to go on an adventure and keep verifying along the way. Don’t let it stop you from asking questions, or from finding truth. 

3. Thirdly, and last for today’s list, Senegal taught me embrace my sweetness, play up my softness, cus babygirl you’re not in New York. 

Let’s face it, I’m a New Yorker born and raised, Brooklyn through and through, aht aht aht! I know how to get around the city in a hurry. I know how to mind my business and keep it moving. I know how to keep my eyes open without making eye contact with crazies. However, it’s quite counterproductive to be rough and tough when you regularly need help getting around, and have to keep asking strangers for directions. Google doesn't always have updated info on all the places you need to go, if it has info at all. I had no wifi out in the street. Most houses don’t have numbers and most towns don’t have street names. You literally have to ask. But don’t feel bad, even taxi drivers stop and ask for directions lol. 

You begin to kind of soften up organically because so many people will go out of their way to help you find where you’re going or a person you’re looking for. In Senegal, you can really see how people depend on the kindness of others, and the community built off of just being fellow humans in need. That was so heart warming to me. New Yorkers will help you around to a certain extent, but most people are in too much of a rush to stop and help the way people will help you in Dakar. Is it because I look like a child? Maybe! Is it because I’m clearly not from around here? Could be. All I know is I was grateful for the help. 

[ayliahzarah27]

Treatment 1

Treatment part one

Codes and conventions of a music video:

Check out this slideshow for some insight to it:

 https://www.slideshare.net/abishaw/codes-and-conventions-of-music-videos-finished

Genre:

Because my audience are teenagers (15 years to 18 years) and few other details listed in my concept such as the idea of discovery and as well as decision making, there was not one genre that had all these ideas within it.

Artist section (music genre, scouting and biography)

Music Genre:

These days many people are into the music genre with plenty of beats in them like RnB, techno, pop and now even K-pop. Not that I am judging. That last music genre is actually my favorite one. But actually its because the majority of those people are young kids and teenagers as well. Which is actually a good thing because its well within my target audience. But its because of this matter that I have tried looking for artists that have composed songs similar to that beat filled music genre and also songs with lyrics relevant to my concept. This will help me engage my target audience not only to what is happening visually but also verbally.

Artist scouting and Artist Biography.

Two songs with their respectful artists that have some evidence to what I want to be shown and said in my music video are:

Wake me up by B.A.P

Image reference: https://www.google.com/url sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwiH9p2i8LHUAhUI0mMKHZYxDmYQjRwIBw&url=http%3A%2F%2Fjapakomusic.com%2Fb-a-p-release-japanese-version-mv-for-wake-me-up%2F&psig=AFQjCNHD6Z6BoTBb80W7FuFHPmCuJ6FHeQ&ust=1497135931602546

B.A.P is a South-Korean boy band signed under the label, TS entertainment. They debuted in 2012 with their first musical single “warrior” and have since produced songs that have gained some attention for their “aggressive, no-bars held approach to hip hop and pop bangers”. Their newest song, Wake me up is actually, according to an article posted by Jeff Benjamin at http://www.billboard.com/articles/columns/k-town/7720997/why-bap-wake-me-up-kpop-bands-most-personal-accomplished-single,  “details a story of redemption for the entire group” because of their lawsuit against TS entertainment which put the band out of the music industry for nearly a year.

For this song though, if we take into consideration the music in the song, then all I have to say is that it has some pretty good beats which sounds very modern and also because the artist is a Korean boy band, I think that some of my target audience might actually like the song in the music video. The Korean pop phenomenon is actually becoming quite global nowadays so I think the use of this song in my music video might actually prove to be quite effective. If we took into consideration the lyrics in the song, its actually not that bad and it seems quite relevant to the kind of effect i want my target audience to experience in my music video

For example, here is a section of lyrics from the actual song that has been translated into English:

Wake up, we’ve pressed for time That innocent child has grown up suddenly Now I’ll awaken this fearful society Share a story with the new me You can’t put a price on my life It’s a life that can’t be exchanged with anyone else’s

The lyrics share some of what I want to show or make my target audience understand about how social media influence can do to people.

God Only Knows by MKTO

Image reference: https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwjfoqGq9bHUAhVG8mMKHSCNCeYQjRwIBw&url=https%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FGod_Only_Knows_(MKTO_song)&psig=AFQjCNFXPNUdZQMfZ-l08GUaMRKaPN0cWQ&ust=1497137328778131

MKTO was an American pop duo. Members are Malcolm Kelley and Tony Oller. Although the duo have discontinued their activities now (2017), they have produced quite a few songs that show some potential for my music video. They elaborated upon the inspiration for their name, saying: “It also stands for what our album kind of is: Misfit Kids and Total Outcasts – just like the kids we were in high school”

I feel like MTKO - God only knows has some kind of meaning that is very close to what I think my music video concept wants to “say” to my target audience. Its more like a similar message which i think portrays how most teens think nowadays. And this is only based on the lyrics written for the song.

God only knows How much I need you I could explode If I can’t breathe you I’m on the ropes 5 4 3 2 Cause you’re the one I guess I’m done that’s how it goes Where will I be without you yeah? God only knows 

Challenges I may face and how I will overcome them:

Weather:

I will have to keep a record of the forecast for the weeks of my production period and when and what time to do a shoot and when during that day and week. This will help keep everything on schedule right up until the editing and compressing stage.

Casting:

I have considered asking a few of my media studies colleagues to help me through this part of the pre-production period just in case finding a cast for filming proves to difficult of a task.

Working Cameras:

All media studies groups for filming will be given two extra cameras if the one camera I will be using doesn’t work as well and or breaks down.

Ethical and legal considerations:

if an accident or situation were to occur while and during a filming period, contracts will be conducted and will be signed by all those involved in and during the production period to ensure that neither myself nor my group members are responsible for that action happening. This is so that everything still stays on schedule and we would not have to involve legal action that could lead to further problems.

Technical elements and production visuals:

Camera shots - I will include are mostly Mid shots, CU, LS, and over the shoulder shots. Although there might be a few other shots that I will include but they are ones which I will not use all the time.

Lighting - I will use mostly normal daylight lighting and as well as a bit of no lighting at all for some parts of the shots. Mainly because I have no equipment that could help me build lighting and also my locations for shooting are not complicated so it already has the lighting that it needs.

Wardrobe - Visual samples of summer casual wear:

[0225pm]

this is gonna be one long ass post so pls bear with me. i just felt like i must write everything in details! today was probably the most surprising day ever for me (pun intended 😂) the night before han asked me if i had any plans or if i wanted to go anywhere on sunday of which i said, no because i really didn't have anywhere i needed to be so i asked him to plan something. he then said, "ok ah i plan but you cannot ask me any questions about whatever i plan. you just follow me only. if you ask also, i will just ignore and not answer the questions." which i agreed to!!! and i was honestly looking forward to see if he actually really did planned anything. the next day, i was in a frikin dilemma LOL. mainly because i didn't know what to wear. i thought of wearing something casual, an oversized tee with a jacket or something but i figured i might be too underdressed and for some reason i wanted to look bomb af for my man. i even put on my gold metallic eyeshadow which i usually never do and mascara!!!!! i just wanted to look cute la ok hahahaha to the point that i even asked seanna what to wear or to give me some ideas for an outfit. but i ended up just piecing my own look together - i wore this cute floral top which i got the other day at temt and my black pleated skirt. pairing it with my chucks and backpack made me look almost like a 90s high school kid or smth HAHAHAAH (what an exaggeration LOL) should have worn my choker out too but ughHh i think i may need to get a new one cus the one i have is a tad bit thick and feels uncomfortable after awhile. bc of my get-up, i felt like +1 to my self confidence!! it made me feel happy. anyway, he came over to my place to fetch me and was alr waiting for me when i came down. the first thing he said when he saw me was, "why you so prettyyyyy" FML can you imagine just how much i was bursting with excitement on the insides and how happy i was???? ofc he always do compliment me from time to time but this time it made me feel really happy because he said "i can see the effort you put into your look today"!!!!! which is true i rly did put quite a bit of extra effort than usual into picking out my outfit and make up today ^^ and those actually boosted my self confidence, it made me feel cute. but oh boy what he did on the bus made me feel all electrifying and melty wtf (can you feel two diff emotions at once bc i did!!!!) so we boarded the bus and took a seat and the next thing he said again was, "why you so prettyyyy" of which i humbly said "nooOoOooO" because i'm so shy???? wtf how long together already still so shy hahahaah. and then proceeded to sniff(?) and kiss my cheek and then a lot of skinship happened wtf i love skinship with han it makes me feel so loved omg the feeling is indescribable la if you really love someone, you will probably feel the same way i do!!!! my fav was when he kept looking at my tummy (ok i'm still actually rly shy about this even tho he said that he doesn't mind and find it cute) and then joked about how the top stretches out and became white (it's a black base top) bc of my tummy. and then i just kept like poking my tummy???????? and then he just grabbed my whole body into his arms and squished me tightly and said smth like "eeee geramnye!!!" wah fuk i rly love it when he speaks malay and go all touchy and clingy HAHAHAAHAH oh i also asked if he had alr eaten and if he still hasn't made any plans we can maybe go grab a bite first then walk around the mall or smth if we don't have any plans for the day. honest to God i don't mind not doing anything as long as i'm with him!! this is absolutely legit. we don't even have to talk or whatever as long as he's physically there for me to see and hold on to ya know what i mean? ok and then we walked towards the mrt and by this time i still don't know where we were going!!!! i kept asking but like he told me the night before, he just ignored my questions and left them unanswered. he then asked me to sit under the fan (it was blazing hot today) while he walked over to he mrt waiting area and as i observed, took out his phone (i thought hmmm maybe he's trying to search where to eat or smth) and then we boarded the train and stopped at kembangan????? which just makes me questioned him again bc why kembangan when there's nothing there at all! there are no malls and places there seems barren. again, he didn't answer and then took me to the taxi stand. by this time i was kinda trying to be patient bc it was so hot and i was perspiring and my makeup was melting and my outfit felt sticky under all that perspiration i just didn't feel cute anymore. i kinda felt like all my efforts to dress up for him was gone just like that and i blame the sun!!!!! it has been rather humid lately and i hate it sfm! and then he told me to stand under the shade while he smoked a stick and then made some calls. by this time i knew he was alr booking a grab and i demanded answers. i wanted to know why he's wasting his money on grab YET AGAIN when we could have just taken the train and save $$!!! we ended up taking the grab anyway and i kinda snapped at him inside and i felt rly sorry for it bc i can be quite a bitch when i'm hot and sweaty. and then bc he didn't wanna tell me where were we going i thought maybe i can ask the grab driver but apparently EVEN SHE WAS IN CAHOOTS WITH HAN OK like i came to a sudden realization that maybe han called her to tell her not to tell me if i asked!!!!!!!! and then she drove thru geylang area and i asked han again where we're going and this time he gave me a hint!!!!!! he said "we're going somewhere where there are lots of food" so ofc my initial thought was onekm!! bc we were nearby and then i asked him "is it onekm?" and then he said "ya how u know!!!" but ugh he lied bc the driver drove past onekm and then all of a sudden we were nearby suntec area. han tried to cover my sight bc he didn't want me to see where we were gonna end up at but i struggled (i was in an uncomfortable position) so he finally relented and then spilled the beans by pointing to a poster of yayoi kusama outside and telling me that's where we're going. AND I WAS SO SHOOKETH!!!! wtf i rly was so shocked ..... ............ it never crossed my mind, not even once throughout the whole journey that he was taking me to the art gallery to see her exhibitions. istg i was so shook i didn't know what to say to him. all i rmbr saying was "omg yayoi kusama??? you're bringing me to yayoi kusama????? it's expensive tho omg whattttttttt" and then i said smth like "noOoo let's not go and waste money it's rly expensive it's like 30 bux per entry wtf" and then he said smth like "u dw go then i go myself la" and i was like "no wth!!!!!" and when we reached there, unfortunately the tickets were all sold out ahahahahah it was rly quite unfortunate bc han took so much effort and wasted money on grabbing down but honestly i felt really fucking touched by his actions today. like all those efforts to keep it a surprise till the very end, money spent on grab bc he thought that if we take the train all the way we will be late for the exhibitions, trying to plan something even though he's a horrible planner. everything he did makes me appreciate his existence in my life even more. he's rly so boyfriend material now wtf so fucking sweet and romantic. but he was really really disappointed to find out that the tickets were all sold out to the point that he even went back down to ask the person at the counter if there's really no tickets left. he said smth like "i don't usually do this and it's not everyday that i plan smth for u but the tickets are all sold out. i should have made an online booking la fuck la" he was just blaming himself all the way and i really felt so sad for him. i wanted to cheer him up but i didn't rly know how to bc i knew how much he tried his best to make me happy today. and for that, i am really really thankful bc in the end, it's the thought that really counts!!! his mood from there on just changed :( and he suddenly became rather grouchy and masked it by saying that he was hungry. but i knew he was still disappointed by the fact that his plans was botched. OK I WILL CONTINUE PART 2 LATER WHEN I AWAKEN FROM MY SLUMBER BC ITS 4:50AM AND IM STARTING TO FEEL SLEEPY