#reading some of his final thoughts

[caliburn-not-calculator]

MR-SN with a dream journal.

Using it to record notes for future research, to write grand tales both fictional and true, to compose performances for his friends, to have somewhere to put all those increasingly questionable fantasies about a certain wizard, to introspect on his subconscious, to make art from and for.

I think it would be neat :3

[xxplastic-cubexx]

graph

bonus:

[starflungwaddledee]

sadly wasn't up to drawing anything today even though it was my beloved blueberry's birthday, sorry 😔 but instead i baked cookies!!

happy birthday meta knight!

[claitea]

idk quick doodles of a time where volo ends up finally giving up his plans and rei gets his friend back. i just really wanted to draw that hug haha

[dailyjevil]

hello!! hope you're having a good day :D

since you're doing the pride flag challenge, I hope you don't mind me requesting the lithromantic/sexual flag!

left is lithsexual and the right is lithromantic, idm which one you pick :]

(it means to feel romantic and/or sexual attraction to someone but doesn't want the feeling reciprocated or stops once it is :>)

Day 297 of posting Jevil every day

[sacchiri]

Hellsing 2002 calendar illustration.

Ein wunderliche und erschröckliche Hystori von einem großen Wüttrich genant Dracole wayda Der do so ganz unkristenliche marrter hat angelegt die mensche, als mit spissen als auch die leut zu Tod geslyffen

A wondrous and frightening story about a great berserk called Dracula the voivode who inflicted such unchristian tortures such as with stakes and also dragged people to death

[sayakxmi]

Saiouma Puella Magi AU, but Kokichi takes Madoka's role and Shuichi takes Homura's.

For one, Kokichi's too naturally distrustful to just hear "I can grant you any wish :)" and not think ok where's the hook. So he just does what no one ever has & essentially interrogates Kyubey, so he knows it all even before he gets to make a contract. So, some of his classmstes are MGs & he won't become one himself BUT he still ends up tagging along to just protect them in his Kokichi ways. (Though I'm entertaining Kokichi lying about being a magical girl, because, well, it's Kokichi).

(I also got a small idea of Gonta being a magical girls and Kokichi originally tagging along him into labyrinths, Gonta also makes him a magic gun from the toy one he had, and at some point witches out & Kokichi manages to kill him with that gun. So he always has that spare Grief Seed on himself, bc it's still his best friend & he can't handle the idea of just giving it away or using it himself (he does anyway in the end).)

Shuichi prolly ends up being a new kid & it isn't like MadoHomu, the ppl who reach him first are Kaede & Kaito, classic. Kokichi's there, too, but he's his usual sus self. He's actually discouraging ppl from making a contract when they find out magic and miracles are real, which absolutely includes Shuichi. He's very vocal abt it, but he won't explain stutf, bc 1) he's a liar, so who'd believe him? and 2) he doesn't want them to witch out upon finding out the truth or, idk, murder everybody Mami-style.

Anyway, fast forward, bad things happen bingo & by the end of the run most charas are dead, there's Walpurgis nachting, and he makes his wish to bring back the ppl who died notably not as magical girls. Contract signed, he fights & fails, rip. I also thought it was similar to how he thought he could end the killing game by himself - he though he could finish Walpurgisnacht by himself, too. And he failed in both times. Whatevs.

Shuichi doesn't actually make his time travel wish for Ouma specifically, he wants to save all his friends. Timelines are messy esp at first bc he either tells then or it backfires or just makes himself look very sus bc he's trying not to tell them. He also realizes why Kokichi hadn't told anybody aby witches at some point, bc, yeah, it messes them a lot, assuming they believe it.

Still, Kokichi ends up one of the few people who are nearly always giving him a chance, not necessarily out of belief, but out of pragmatism - bro can stop time & knows the truth, that's just too useful. So they often work together & Shuichi grows closer to him but still we ain't there yet. But the thing is, Shuichi's time travel still makes Kokichi more & more powerful with each timeline, bc Shuichi usually goes back after Kokichi dies, so the universe figured out this guy's life's important. Anyway, another notable thing is the iconic Homura kills Madoka scene, but it's Saiouma with guest stars of Kaito & Maki. It's Walpy, it's not defeated yet, but the training trio are spent & just kinda accept their fate of turning into witches together. And then, boom, Kokichi appears & steals their Soul Gems for a sec & he's like did u know you can cleanse your Soul Gem with a darkened one? But it's a lie & he quickly tells them so, he just had a spare Grief Seed after cleansing his Soul Gem & he needs them to do some stuff. Shuichi can travel back in time & fix things, and Maki & Kaito are needed to fight Walpy here. He actually questions what happens to the timelines Shuichi leaves behin, and ofc he doesn't know. There's a chance they remain, so Kokichi needs Maki & Kaito to fight Walpy here.

Kaimaki leave, and Shuichi finally looks at Kokichi & realizes sth is Wrong. Kokichi struggles to hide how he's trembling & grimacing, and it's Kokichi, so obviously it must be extremely bad. Shuichi dreadfully realizes something worse, and he weakly asks Kokichi why aren't his wounds healing. And Kokichi just falls, laughing weakly, and Shuichi catches him & searches for his Soul Gem and, God, he knew it. It's nearly completely black. Kokichi laughs & admits he lied abt having two Grief Seeds, he only had one he never wanted to use. But they'll have the second one soon, so no need to worry. He asks Shuichi to maybe destroy his witch form as it's hatching, so he'll have the Grief Seed without any fighting… and he admits that he hates fighting, he hates this magical world and all its violence. He says that Kaito was right in calling him a coward, even here he just can't handle the idea of fighting any longer, he's so sorry. And Shuichi tells him he ISN'T a coward. He was scared, but he always followed everybody, trying to help, and when push came to shove he would always make a contract for the benefit of others rather than himself. He's a lot of things, but a coward isn't one. Kokichi actually tears up hearing that, and Shuichi promises he won't let him fight ever again, and especially he won't let him turn into a witch and hurt anybody, because he knows it's the last thing he's ever wanted. Even now he only accepts turning into a witch to help them fight to keep others safe. So Shuichi won't let him. Kokichi probably apologizes and thanks him and then he dies.

Keeping Kokichi from fighting starts off as a side quest that gains importance with time, bc it's something Shuichi won't compromise on (ah, trauma), which leads him to occassionally neglect others a bit, which makes them more likely to get hurt & ironically Kokichi more likely to make a contract, especially since he gets more powerful & Kyubey is more interested in him with each timeline. And that also makes him witch out super quick. Shuichi's paying more attention to him & over time grows resentful of others for how they're treating him. To Shuichi it's no question that Kokichi cares & is just doing his best to help, but nobody realizes that.

But the biggest obstacle in keeping Kokichi from fighting is actually Kokichi himself, bc he's too smart and nosy, lmao. Even if he knows nothing, he will find out quickly. Doesn't help that Kyubey wants him to make a contract.

Also, obviously Kaito is Sayaka-coded and Maki could be Kyouko-coded, so that's a thing, BUT it's usually Maki that witches out. Kaito is usually pretty close, but Kokichi intervenes & he survives, but Maki later cracks on her own (and since in the new timeline Kokichi isn't there, Kaito's the one to die, so he's still the secretary). So it's Kaito who gets the dramatic sacrifice. I imagine he genuinely hoped you could bring somebody back if you tried Very Hard & Kokichi called him a moron bc obviously it's not possible. If it was there'd be far less witches that there are. But it's Kaito, he doesn't listen to reason. So, Kokichi follows him to the labyrinth. At first Kaito's mad cuz what if Kokichi being there ruins the plan? Maki hates his guts! But eventually he gets hit pretty hard, and Kokichi is near immediately by his side, trying to help him get up, which kinda makes Kaito short circuit a little bc wait Kokichi's trying to help? But witch!Maki attacks them & Kokichi pushes Kaito away & gets caught himself (and choked until unconsciousness, naturally). Anyway, Kaito gets him away, Shuichi catches Kokichi & Kaito makes up his mind about going down with Maki & asks Shuichi to tell Kokichi that he's sorry. He doesn't get him, but he got hurt trying to protect him, so he'll believe in that if nothing else. F.

As for The WishTM, in the last timeline Shuichi lashes out at Kokichi for his willingness to just become part of the system. In no timeline has his wish actually helped, it did NOTHINHG, which OUCH but it also makes Kokichi think out of the box more & he becomes the Law of Cycles. And Shuichi realizes what is happening & freaks out bc Kokichi's doing it bc of what he told him & like Homura they end up having a momentTM in space & Shuichi remembers. He feels a lot of guilt even tho he also questions whether anything was real, but if it was, he pushed somebody he far too realized he loved into erasing himself from existence.

[mechazushi]

None of the voices are what I had I'm mind. . .

YOU AINT GONNA CATCH ME COMPLAIN' THO.

[jenna-louise-jamie]

thinking about yassen gregorovich instead of sleeping (because i love him) and how he is a catalyst. yassen stabbs ash -> ash kills john rider -> ian rider raises alex -> yassen kills ian rider -> mi6 blackmails alex into becoming a teenage spy.

i have so many thoughts that i can't properly articulate. obviously this is a simplified chain of events, but yassen and his choices set off a chain reaction of the world's most unfortunate dominos. especially when you read russian roulette. to be clear im not necessarily trying to blame him for everything because that feels very mean. he was also just a 14 year old kid when everything in his life went wrong, just like alex. only difference being yassen literally had no one.

i think i should write an essay about this because i haven't even gotten into my thoughts about what yassen and alex's dynamic would look like past eagle strike. i would imagine it'd be similar to ellie and joel from the last of us part 2.

where obviously yassen loves alex and alex on some level cares for yassen back but struggles to reconcile that with the fact that yassen is responsible for his uncle's death. a very unforgivable act. it would be so messy and complicated and angsty, because on one hand here is an adult who truly cares about him and has a connection with him through his father. yassen could tell alex about john, and trust that yassen truly wants whats best for him. but he killed ian, and he cannot take that back.

while alex reels from those feelings, yassen is also trying to reconcile his love of alex with the knowledge that he on some level is responsible for the suffering alex endured at the hands of mi6. and possibly even the fact that alex's godfather is the one who killed john and helen.

[slavhew]

Hello!

If you're not too busy, would you mind listing some of the things you think count as death flags for Mr. Spender?

There's the obvious fact that he's the "old" mentor to group of young protagonists, but what else do you think would count?

OHH BOY ok so I'd think I'm a crackpot for this but since we're talking about Zack "Foreshadowing" Morrison. I have some thoughts

No harm in leading with the (chronologically) first thing that jumped out at me:

This one IMMEDIATELY made me antsy whenever I came back to it after my initial read, and considering Zack has referred to it on twitter in the past as one of their favorite jokes it's definitely not been forgotten about.

Second, the sheer amounts of near-misses, jokey or not, of Spender narrowly avoiding specifically lightning

Again, not much, but it's weird that it happened thrice, latter two of which had real gravitas rather than an one-off joke.

And third, Spender himself. He's repeatedly shown himself to be kind of a self sacrificing idiot, as well as prideful to a fault. Granted, it's both him and Mina trying to take on all the responsibility of saving Mayview and its inhabitants from their fate.. But Spender is exactly that right measure of doesn't-value-himself-enough (chest footprint aftercare or lack thereof), having an obscene amount of power (enables his loner act + pride) and poor judgement that has the capacity to put him at great risk. And it has!

Spender has not only shown low enough self-esteem to view himself as the de-facto scapegoat for the safety of the town, but also prideful enough to make very bad calls that end up in people, often himself, hurt (COUGH FORGE INCIDENT COUGH)

This is all conjecture, but it's definitely enough to make me worried about him :') Even if all this doesn't mean he'll necessarily die he's definitely getting (even more) seriously injured at some point. I love the guy but he's so far doing a horrible job of convincing me he wants to live bad enough to circumvent at least that

[alienglowgarden]

Watching endless movies on the projector, the two of you develop an inside joke- Tarkovsky must have secretly been a gardener too. The first time Sol shows him their namesake, Solaris, he is struck by the immaculate beauty, pinnacle of aesthetic composition the world of Tarkovsky's film is. It sets an impossible standard that in a real three dimensional space Sym cannot reach. For a good decade all he can think of is Stalker. By year 6 Vertigo Valley skews more green than fuchsia. For months his work barely moves a single square meter, as he works every angle into mise en place.

I was so funny for this [drabbles and quick idea scrawlings I never posted]

nother sym sol bit. Never wrote out how they come to the conclusion but rest assured there was a path I followed here. It makes sense ok. Philosophy is cool. similar line of thought as that one tumblr post that extrapolates "The default way for something to taste is good. When something tastes good we say "tasty" reinforcing that connection," and what that means for our understanding of morals. From that which is in abundance on vertumna, in the values the gardeners hold, one can make a comparative moral good and evil, which would differ from one borne of human culture. And Sym unfortunately falls squarely on the bad side. Lucky for the brand new invasive species tho.

“You're Evil.” You conclude chuckling as you speak out loud the logic of Gardener morality. “By their standards, you're immoral.” Sym doesn't seem to take it as lightly. “Let’s not talk about this, sugarbug.” That takes you aback. Its the first time something has truly been off the table like this. He’d always said it in a playful tone, directed the conversation to another topic. Here, his eyes were pleading with you to drop it.  You delight in this, knowing his cursed existence mirrors yours so neatly. But it seems you are the only one to see it as such. You find the idea funny in that self-deprecating, ironic kind of way. That "All you can do is laugh, right?" way. But maybe you're alone in this. Maybe you're the wicked dolphin in a sea of beautiful, morally upright sharks with no higher brain function to be capable of intentional cruelty. You think you are this on some cosmic scale, because your brains dipped halfway into another dimension of reality, while all the others still exist in just the three. 

Oh I found the bit abt the green!

When Sym announces that Sol has stopped wearing green, Sol's mothers face tightens, her eyes narrowed, Marz hms indignantly and puts a finger to her chin, Tangent cocks her head to the side and Anemone has no idea what this statement is supposed to evoke in her. Amidst the group of Sols closest friends, she feels stupid for not knowing the answer. Weren't they close once? Weren't they like brothers? It wasn't even so long ago that Anemone still felt close to Sol. She knew them where it mattered, she had thought. Sol, just like Anemone, meant to keep their colony safe at any cost. It wasn't so long ago that they stood side by side with their rifles drawn, watching each others backs. More than anything, the hurt inside Anemone was from the simple fact that she could not protect Sol from this now. Whatever this was. Was green a good sign or a bad one?

the idea being Sol -in line w stuff like insisting people call the xenos "animals" and reminding people that this planet is their home and not some hostile alien prison- very publicly expunges green from their wardrobe to further drive that same point: Vertumna is their home, not the Earth they never experienced. Against their mothers aggressive hostility toward the native plants, they shed what she has stubbornly held onto, they let it go and embrace what is around them. The things that wish to grow. Bit of a political performance piece to make the people around them think abt it. Which also unfortunately Flulu takes as a grave personal insult <3

This works in concert with the drabble of Sols self-exile to the sea, something predating that slightly, perhaps.

---

heres a gushy one. solsym ofc.

Sol admits love is a terrifying concept. There is a fear that among their own kind, it will never be enough. Will they be able to finish their work, be capable of carrying out the work that must be done? How will it change them, them for whom the worst part is the change. The unknowable them, a variable they don't have an answer for. It makes their anxiety spike. They often think it is the wrong choice to love someone. To love Sym. Sym hums, quiet and contemplative for a moment, then murmurs 'I know how you feel." He has embraced all the same follies for Sol. Had to grapple with the same thoughts of how it changed who he was fundamentally, beginning with this body. "Sol, you are such a magnificent human being. I have never met anyone quite like you. When I am with you, it feels… Like I'm witnessing history. Just the movement of your hand captivates and stills my heart, for it might usher in something never before seen. You alone possess such a unique understanding of the vision. For all my fear of how you cloud my judgement, I am dazzled several magnitudes more by what you bring to my life. Be glad, my love, for I trust you implicitly. Do not fear change inside yourself. Think of yourself as an experience, not a hard defined point of identity. It is the truest name for it I have come to know in all of my time as Gardener. Come, experience it with me," he extends his hand to them, a gentle smile opening up his whole face as he looks to Sol with such utter devotion, it stops their brain in its tracks. As if in a daze, they reach forward and intertwine their fingers with his, only conscious of the sound of friction as their palms graze against each other. Only the physical sensations at the forefront of their brain, overwhelming the whole of their thoughts.

Also had this ol thing w Sol post saving Tammy n always trying to raise her confidence route.

Sometimes you think maybe Tammy knows something. Wrapped up in her sad unsure speeches there is an inkling of understanding. Does she know? Does she feel it too? On some smaller scale, but... Does she know she shouldn't be alive? You wonder if being saved by you changes them somehow. You spend your childhood talking more to the adults than to your own peers in an effort to deduce some sort of tell, a connection, wondering if you've made them "stuck" too. You think this is the most callous version of yourself. This burning question has hardened you to trivial experiences. To the simplicity of joy. Its just like Tagent said- You're in the swamp, calculating in your head once again if Vace is more useful to the colony alive or dead. You think you see him, here and there: Sym. It had hurt, but you'd stayed away for as long as you could. Tammy, you should have been fearless, you should have realized you had cheated death and nothing could ever touch you again. Not as long as Sol lived.

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

Babel-17

sci-fi set in a future in an intergalactic war facing unknown beings only known as ‘invaders’

when a new code from the enemy is discovered, a poet/linguist/cryptographer is asked to try crack it - but quickly realises it’s a language

she assembles a crew to travel to the war yards to study the language, and discovers that learning it changes the way people think and interact with others

explores linguistic relativity

queer and polyamorous characters

[wyvernsrus]

Was working on a Maze doodle that has decided to evolve into a full work but I was messing with his hair and ya know. I gave him a lil ponytail, for when he's in his comfy clothes.

Maze wearing his worn out shirt and the bottoms of his reds. Maybe Zey got him some fuzzy socks.

Maze curled up in bed with his glasses on and hair pulled back so he can read his novel in peace while pausing to answer coms from his siblings and the other alphas he's friends with.

Comfy Maze

[st4zia]

Marina, where are you?

[hadesknockedupintheunderworld]

"But why would Sonic still be friends with them why wouldn’t he denounce them or treat them like the villains they are? Why won't he realize they're just evil?"

First of all, has it perhaps occured to you that Sonic loves/cares for them no matter what they do and doesn't want to hurt them if he doesn't have to? Has it perhaps occurred to you that he doesn't see them like irredeemable villains and it's not because he's a dumb dumb idiot?

Second of all, haha keep talking and I'm gonna unroll my character analysis essay. "They're just evil" yeah that's rich. Bet you thought the ending of the series was about "redeeming" them too, huh?

[kathybluecaller]

Finally got around drawing Aioros :D