#recognizing trauma

[seekerwingzcg]

Sort of personal/ talking about my problems because I am alone 🥲👇

Was I the only one that was frozen with discomfort at that scene where Sentinel was talking to the group, mainly D-16, Starscream, and Bee? Especially when Megatron got branded?

I was wondering why I didn't leave the theaters excited and actually left dissociating and feeling emotionally numb(because I really enjoyed the movie). I think it's starting to come to my attention what's going on with my mental health.

If anyone else felt this way, I'm here to talk cuz the reminders from the fanart that occasionally pop up hit harder than they may with others.

[leadlikeaqueen]

Are You Stuck In Your Trauma?

For a black woman leader who feels that she's stuck going in circles and never obtaining the goals she's pursuing, sometimes she just needs help recognizing what's keeping her stuck. Listen or watch episode 8 of season 4 Plant Your Seeds of Transformation

How Can You Recognize Trauma So You Can Get Unstuck? For a black woman leader who feels that she’s stuck going in circles and never obtaining the goals she’s pursuing, sometimes she just needs help recognizing what’s keeping her stuck. Listen or watch episode 8 of season 4 on the Plant Your Seeds of Transformation Podcast. LISTEN VIA SPOTIFY, or… Episode 8 via Spotify WATCH VIA YOUTUBE,…

[ena333333]

I find Sebastian extremely attractive when he is bleeding, unconscious, or injured. Perhaps it's because he seems less like a monster and more human when he's in pain or distress.

[pip3dream]

can we talk about how Thea does not deserve Kevin, she never had it as bad as Kevin did, which means she’s loyal to the Ravens through and through, the Ravens are losing Kevin’s loyalty and have been but especially with “i’ve never been skiing/riko would’ve killed neil if andrew wasn’t fast enough” the ravens will always be a part of both of them but Kevin is trying to get past it (not exactly trying but he doesn’t care about the ravens anymore) and Thea will always be there to remind him of his time at the Nest and all the bad things that happened there

she’s not good enough for him because she’s a reminder of his trauma, Jean was able to heal because Cat/Laila/Jeremy were there to tell him that what happened to him wasn’t normal, the Foxes all had their own trauma and didn’t have the space to help Kevin through his (Kevin’s also a bitch and won’t let anyone in) Andrew got him through the trauma but he’s not past it. Kevin needs someone to help him, Thea will always say the ravens were right and will take their side over Kevins. Kevin is also obsessed with exy and Nicky even said it “you can love exy but it’ll never love you back” he needs someone to help him heal and Thea can’t do that when she’s just as obsessed with exy as he is.

petition to get Kevin Day a new love interest please

[hey-hey-j]

lore dropping

(★ my Kofi)

[fusionsprunt]

Non-canon instance where Beatrix accidentally falls into another dimension in which Holloway's Comet didn't make it to planet Zona.

[natalievoncatte]

Spoilers for Arcane Season 2. Ending Spoilers.

The tables had turned, and now Vi was the one waiting. She was so tired, so utterly absolutely tired of being the one to helplessly watch. As she waited she flexed her fingers and tugged at her wraps, sometimes rolled her shoulder as if, suddenly, there was something she could do with all her strength. Her knuckles were still sore from punching the wall in Jinx’s cell.

It had all happened so fast. How long had it been? The sun had set, but she’d lost track of time. She wasn’t leaving this room, no matter what.

Part of her had almost run. When she lurched down from the hexgate, limping and dragging one depowered gauntlet with the other, spotting Caitlyn alive had made her heart sing, a bright spot that kept the hollow in her chest from collapsing in on itself and pulling her on with it. She had someone. She had a reason.

Cait saw her, took two steps, and collapsed in a heap, bleeding profusely from her left eye, her uniform soaked in blood from a gash on her flank.

Vi didn’t think she had it in her to run that fast. She’d ignored her own injuries. Nothing mattered but keeping Cait safe. Picking her up and carrying her left Vi herself covered in blood. There was so much, but somehow Cait was still breathing.

She lay in her own bed, chest softly rising and falling. She looked like she was merely asleep, unbothered even though the left side of her face was a mass of bandages and there was a bottle of fluids feeding into her arm.

Vi felt the silent presence in the room and glanced towards the door.

Tobias.

The last thing she remembered him saying in her presence was “what is she still doing here?”

He hadn’t said a word to her, even though she stood by for hours while he and the other doctors had worked on Caitlyn. Barely even looked at her. He wasn’t even the one who handed her a cloth mask to wear over her face and he said nothing to her of Cait’s condition or her prognosis.

It was the same when he came to stand by the bed. An awkward pall fell over the palatial bedroom and Vi couldn’t look at him. The man has already lost his wife and his daughter lay maimed in her bed and might not wake up. What was there to say?

He shuffled awkwardly and Vi noticed he was carrying something. He put the bundle on the bed.

“Clean yourself up. You’re filthy.”

Vi blinked. She’d discarded the jacket of her uniform, but the blood had soaked through to her undershirt, and she was battered and bloodied herself. She’d almost broken her arm and her right shoulder was screaming. Her clothes were crusted with dirt and other people’s blood.

He was not wrong.

“I brought you these, they’re mine. I don’t think anything of Caitlyn’s will fit you.”

Vi muttered a soft, confused “thank you” and took the bundle of clothes, briefly wondering where she should go, before she remembered that Cait had her own bathroom.

As Vi walked inside, she felt a cold rush on her skin. She still couldn’t comprehend that she was allowed here, among all this marble and brass. Cait’s bathroom was big enough to live in. The shower alone was as big as the hovel she’d been living in between bouts and binges.

As she began to undress she realized how tired she was. Every movement was stiff. As she peeled herself out of the uniform she unwrapped bruise after bruise, bloodstain after bloodstain, a road map of agony from head to toe.

The water was a revelation, almost unbearably hot. Old blood and grime sluiced between her toes as the water scorched her back and soaked her hair, the remaining dye sluicing in dark tendrils down her skin.

I don’t deserve this, she thought. I failed everyone. Vander is gone. Jinx is gone. I thought I could be free if I could let Jinx go, but am I free or just empty.

It should have been her.

Even Caitlyn’s towels were luxurious. She’d never felt anything so soft in her life. The heat had loosened her up a little but she still felt creaky and her joints ached. She picked up the shirt Tobias had brought her; she thought it was meant to sleep in. The fabric was even softer, and it felt alien on her skin. It hung too low thanks to Tobias’ height, but it was big enough for her save where her arms and shoulders strained the fabric.

Once she was dressed, Vi returned to the bedroom. She hoped desperately to step out and see Cait sitting up and talking but she was still just lying there, steady but shallow breaths and all, Tobias seated on the edge of the bed and fussing over her.

Vi took the same chair and sighed softly, feeling not much better, just cleaner.

“Let me look at you.”

His voice startled her so much that she simply meekly complied and let him examine the florid bruises on her hand where her knuckles had crashed into the cell wall, even when he gently cupped her chin and turned her head this way and that, staring individually into each eye.

“I know you must hate me.”

His hand fell away. He would no longer look at her. He stood up and turned around, peering through a gap in the curtains.

“I did at first. At first I was so angry. Her whole life, Caitlyn has been obsessed with these notions of justice and progress, with making the Enforcers honorable and just and helping the Undercity, making amends and rebuilding. She’s always had such a kind heart. Then this happened. The Undercity killed my wife, and to me you were the Undercity. Not to mention that every single time you bring her home she’s hurt, and worse than the last time.”

A cold ball clenched in Vi’s gut. He was right. How many more times could this happen before Vi was bringing him back a body and not his daughter?

She was the jinx, wasn’t she?

Tobias’ shoulders hitched and Vi realized he was crying softly.

“I lost one of the two people I live for in an instant… and then began watching the other slip away, piece by piece. Caitlyn became harsh and cold while you were gone. She barely spoke to me, instead spending all her time with that Noxian bitch and her pet whispering poison into her ear. I thought I’d lost her.”

He turned. “Then she brought you in her half dead and begged me to save you and she was just my little girl again, just for a moment.”

Vi’s head snapped up and their gazes briefly met before he broke away.

“Is she going to be okay?” Vi asked softly.

“Okay?” said Tobias. “Okay? I had to remove her eye, Violet. She’s lucky the dagger didn’t pierce her gut or she’d die of sepsis. Now you ask me if-“

He froze, giving Vi a shocked look before his face fell.

“I don’t know what things will ever be between the two of us, but we have her in common, I can see that. Yes, I think she will. My daughter is stronger than you think.”

“I know.”

He turned to leave, saying over his shoulder, “I’ll return in an hour to look in on her. I know what you’re thinking. It’s safe.”

After he left, Vi had to ponder what he meant by that, then it struck her.

Carefully, Vi climbed on the bed, settling beside Cait, nervously settling her weight into the impossibly soft mattress. The bed was so enormous that she had plenty of room.

All she wanted was for Cait to wake up, to hold her again. She had to settle for reaching across the bed and curling her aching fingers around Cait’s limp hand.

She was so tired. Fatigue pressed down on her like a weight and sank her into the bed. Before long, her eyelids grew heavy and she began drifting off despite wrestling to stay awake.

She woke in full dark, the lights doused. Someone had thrown a blanket on her and the bottle of drugs hanging beside Caitlyn had been replaced. Vi sighed, starting to pull her hand free of Cait’s.

She found she couldn’t. Cait’s grip was alarmingly strong weak but her fingers had curled around Vi’s palm and held fast. Her good eye was open, glittering brilliant blue in the dark.

“Violet?” Cait murmured, her voice small and parched.

“That’s my name,” said Vi. Her voice was thick and she choked up a little. “I’m here, Caitlyn.”

“Good,” Cait sighed. “If you’d died I’d kill you.”

Vi snorted.

“I didn’t say this before. I was afraid of what might happen if I did,” Cait rasped. “I love you.”

She squeezed Vi’s palm, not very hard but enough.

“You’re in love with an angry oil slick?”

“My angry oil slick.”

They were quiet for a moment. Cait turned and looked at the ceiling.

“I would understand if… if you feel differently after everything I did to you. I’m sorry, Vi. I’m sorry I hit you, I’m sorry I did those awful things.”

“Cait.”

“I was so angry, I couldn’t-“

“Cait,” Vi insisted. “I love you, too.”

Cait closes her eyes -eye- and smiled softly.

“So you’re in love with an unhinged mongoose?”

“You’re never going to let that go, are you?”

Cait laced her fingers through Vi’s and squeezed, hard.

“No. I am not letting go.”

[mcflymemes]

please don't mistake silence for hatred. please don't mistake unanswered plotting messages as indifference, or a lack of enthusiasm towards you. considering the ages of most roleplayers, many of us have bills to pay, families to take care of, medical conditions to treat, appointments to make, classes to take, homes to clean, and lives to live away from the computer that are far, far more important than writing on tumblr — life has a tendency to get in the way of hobbies and fun things like this. be patient with your fellow writers. if it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out. of course you can set your boundaries, keep your space comfortable, and softblock whoever you wish, but do so while recognizing it's probably not hatred or apathy that keeps them from leaping into your dms with message after message. they probably love this hobby just as much as you... but sometimes life gets in the way.

[nellasbookplanet]

Downfall has only just started, but already I'm deeply curious what Bells Hells reaction will be to seeing it play out. I've mentioned before that I suspect the dislike or outright disdain some of the party feels for the gods - most notably Ashton and Laudna, but also Imogen at times - is in part a product of the gods being so distant as to not feel like real people to them, and therefore being easy scapegoats.

It’s easy to see the mortal victims of Ludinus and the Vanguard as just that: victims. The Hells have met them, have been them. They have not seen or felt the gods suffer in the same way. Laudna even went so far as to blame the gods for mortal deaths and suffering after the solstice, even as the gods are the ones under attack. They feel uniquely abandoned by the world, and it's easy to blame these distant, powerful figures for their hardship. Certainly much easier than to see the mortal systems that enabled their harm, or to actively seek improvement on their own.

But to see the gods now, not just as people but as mortals, with all the flaws and vulnerabilities and fears of any of the Hells, with loved ones of their own and the same desperate sense of self-preservation as any living thing, will they be able to hold onto the disdain that they’ve clung to for so long?

[deathandnonexistentialdread]

After Mana tells Yami that he seems different, his eyes become sad

[hereticalarchives]

Is sex or sexual thoughts (of the straight or queer variety) actually viewed as heretical for space marines in 40k or is it one of those things the fanon has just repeated a lot since the idea is up to interpretation ?

[eel-head]

In case this would be helpful to any other Poolverine writers, here are a couple screenshots from The Emotional Wound Thesaurus: A Writer's Guide to Psychological Trauma on Physical Disfigurement for Wade.

I also made one for Logan too on Bearing The Responsibility For Many Deaths.

[deservedgrace]

thinking about how my faith was one of the last things to fall away after i walked away from the church

thinking about how i left with every intention of coming back, but i knew this place was killing me and would be successful if i stayed any longer

thinking about how the pain and trauma i endured in the church was never enough for the people there, how this place was in line with god which meant it must be good by default, how it couldn't be killing me, how even if it was killing me that must've been part of his grand plan

thinking about how much better it was to be dead and a christian than alive and not, how we take up our cross, how we must become martyrs, how we must sacrifice our pride, our sin, our human nature, our lives

thinking about how the church planned to bury me there

thinking about how all of them encouraged me to stay, how some of them tried to gently guide me back, how some of them told me explicitly and emphatically that i could not leave

thinking about how i left anyway

thinking about how i knew god was real but finally accepted, reluctantly, heartbroken, that i didn't want to be involved with him

thinking about how god still being real to me meant the nightmares of being dragged back were real to me, how the bone-crushing terror of knowing i'd damned myself to hell was real to me, how i failed the easiest open book test in the world, how all i had to do was accept the best gift anyone could give and i couldn't even manage to do that, how the grief and defeat and feelings of inadequacy for not being able to make it work when it was so damn easy were so deeply real to me

thinking about how i knew i could never be forgiven and daring to hope for it was pointless

thinking about how sometimes i hoped anyway

thinking about how i was convinced i'd instigated the wrath of the most powerful being in this universe and beyond, how just smiting me wasn't sufficient, how i deserved to suffer, to burn, to be tortured for all of eternity for the crime of walking away from something that was eating me alive

thinking about how i persevered anyway

[talkethtothehandeth]

Do I need a special crucifix to get medical providers the fuck AWAY from my blog like jesus fuck you guys are the LAST people I’d like to have around the ONE spot where you haven’t been in my life

[rhymeswithumbrella]

you know what really pisses me off? so many people acting like he is the worst person out there and no one will miss him. A LOT of people are grieving now and missing him including people that these people supposedly follow and care about. liam was not the supervillain people wanted him to be. he was messed up and did messed up things likely because of what happened to him. this conversation deserves so much more nuance than people are giving it. and maybe it’s too early to have this conversation now but it’s helping me process and grieve so i’m really writing this for me. people are complex and doing bad things doesn’t make you a bad person or someone worthy of death without being given the chance to make things right. and another thing, it is SO hypocritical to make fun of him and look down on him like he’s the ultimate Bad Guy meanwhile i bet every single person you have ever admired in the spotlight has likely also done bad things or at least things you wouldn’t be proud of. fame is an illness and it can cause people to harm others because they were hurt themselves. human beings are a culmination of everything that they’ve been through and everything they’ve done. he is not only the bad things he’s done and it’s okay and normal to grieve him as a whole person, because he was one.

[womansfilm]

Now, Voyager (1942) / Aliens (1986)