#regular energy drinks are bad enough dammit

[grumpyoldsnake]

So many interesting-sounding drinks in the world that I want to try for the taste

Then I read into them a tiny bit and discover they’re being marketed as supplements and have fucking. 1000% daily value of biotin or enough caffeine to kill a horse or something

*grumble mutter*

[jinxs-gf]

chuck’s favorite regular

jinx x bartender!reader

summary: it’s your first night working at The Last Drop. the stories of jinx being an…interesting customer are true

content, warnings: bar & drinks? jinx calls r ‘toots’, idk how much I like this writing style (bear with me now)

word count: 1.1k

a.n. this was requested but the ask disappeared 😭

It was your first night bartending at the Last Drop. Silco's bar. He owns a lot of them, close to owning all in the Undercity. This one just so happens to be special. Previously the Hound of the Underground's place. Now Silco proudly resides inside it.

Your future bartending partner, Thieram warned you about your boss's daughter. How she was a wild card and if you happened to get caught in her wrath there was no escaping until she decided to let you out. Not unlike a spider's web, you could only hope she'd let go and not eat you alive. To have mercy.

Though he insists Jinx has none.

He's...kind of right you decide. She's not done anything crazy yet. But she gives off this certain energy, one that screams be careful, to not turn your back on her.

She looks fairly innocent at the moment, at least compared to the bar that's in full rage. Loud music, dangerous games, dancing bodies...who could believe this is the girl that torments Thieram on the daily? Maybe she won't be so bad...

You’re contradicting yourself you realize. It's only your first time meeting, you shouldn't set your opinions on her just yet

She sits on the bar table, kicking her legs and looking at you expectantly.

You gulp, "Can I uh...help you?"

"Yeah you can, toots. Mind getting me my drink?"

Dammit Thieram. He didn't tell you what she orders. He spent so much time warning you about her yet he couldn't simply give you what she drinks?! What if she gets upset that you don't know and unleashes her-

"Earth to toots! Yoohoooo" her hand is shaking aggressively in your face, snapping a few times.

You stand in your spot, completely dumbfounded, eyes wide and pulse jumping.

"Uh...what is your drink?" Your voice is meek and careful (and a bit shaky), you felt as if you were poking a bear with a stick. Stupid stupid stupid.

Jinx cackles suddenly and very loudly.

"You crack me up, toots. It's only blood in a bottle."

She drinks blood?! Thieram! How could he not mention-

You try to be as nonchalant as possible despite your own blood running cold.

"So you're like a...vampire? Or-"

She laughs in your face once more, "Oh you poor thing," it's said quite mockingly, "it's a joke! You were totally convinced!"

You blink your eyes once, twice, and shake your head. As if it'll erase the image of a blood sucking Jinx. Your blood...from your neck. A very graphic image your mind unfortunately conjured up.

As if she wasn't intimidating enough, knowing she's loaded with guns and bombs at all times. Imagine if she was a vampire?! You'd be doomed.

However, you were curious now, what if she did have fangs? Maybe you could get a peek-

"My drink is the bottom cabinet in front of you. It gets a special place for Chuck's favorite customer."

Chuck?

You squat down in search for her drink, reach for the lone bottle, "Oh um, who?"

"Oh you've got to know Chuck! He's hilarious! A friend of mine, not my best friend of course. He's a little weird—you can tell him I said that."

You nod along, terrified of the blue eyed menace (one of the many nicknames given by Thieram, you agree. Though even thinking it worries you, what if she can hear your thoughts?). Speaking of Thieram—oh! That’s who she’s talking about.

"You two must get on well," if the man in question's stories were anything to go by, you'd say they didn't get on well. He doesn't enjoy her company, but she certainly enjoys his. By tormenting him.

You only hope you don't land in the same boat as him.

"Oh we definitely do, toots. Who’da thought a girl like me could befriend a scaredy-cat like him? I'd say we'd make good friends too someday. Maybe tomorrow!”

"What's that supposed to mean?" Because to you it sounds like a threat. If you become a good "friend" to her like Thieram is, does that mean you'll get the same treatment? And as soon as tomorrow?! You've barely worked at this place for a few hours and she's already planning on tormenting you by tomorrow!

She doesn't answer your question, instead pointing to (what you assume is) her cup. If the colorful scribbles were anything to go by. And a straw lying right next to it. At least you didn't have to go searching for those.

You nod, gulping. You're hoping to please her, not get on her bad side.

Jinx brings her feet up the counter, crossing and holding them with her hands, rocking playfully back and forth.

She’s dangerously close to the edge, one miscalculated move and she’ll go splat onto the sticky floors.

Maybe it’ll knock some sense into her? Okay that’s rude.

You quietly hand her the drink, plopping the straw in.

Jinx jumps down the counter to sit on the stool, hunched over the bar table to sip. She dramatically smacks her lips, as if taste testing. You’ll admit you were a bit nervous, what if you forgot something in her drink? What if you poured it in wrong the wrong way? Would she get upset over that?

After a few seconds she smiles and nods manically, “10 out of 10! You pour a good cup o’ juice, toots.”

You breathe out relieved, deciding to play along, a little humor could ease your anxiety surely, “Thanks, am I already better than Th- Chuck?”

"You're certainly prettier than he is."

"Oh."

You blank, unsure of what to do with that information. Be flattered? Terrified? Or is she being sarcastic? You continue to play along,

"Flattery will get you nowhere," you joke and only hope it lands.

"It'll get me a free drink," she wriggles her eyebrows.

"Don't you automatically get free drinks? I heard the last guy that asked you to pay mysteriously disappeared."

"You heard right, toots."

You gulp for the—how many times have you done that tonight? She's great at making one sweat.

“It was great getting to know ya toots, but I’m a busy girl. Gotta bounce—think you’ll be okay? Ya know what? You seem like you can hold your own, here—just in case!”

Jinx goes in for a rough hug, and it’s over before you process it at all.

But wait—what was that noise behind you? That sudden weight on your back…

Uh oh.

And explosion goes off on you, and for a second you think it’s over.

But no, it’s simply a colorful, glitter bomb. The damage is done though, you’re sweating at your hairline. And your poor heart, it’s practically begging to run out of your chest.

There’s a note left on the counter, is it too hopeful to think it’s a ‘sorry for the bomb I just planted on your back’?

Nope. It’s simply a winky face in purple ink.

And you can't help but wonder...is she flirting with you?

How sick and twisted.

first time meeting and already down bad for each other? hmm

the request:

Reader is a newly hired bartender that Silco hired. One night it's the usual busyness. Loud music, shimmer people, etc etc. Similarly to "chuck" Jinx enjoys fucking around with them. Little powder bombs and stuff like that.

[kiribaku-queen]

Unexpected [2/8]

Pairing: Dabi x reader, Hawks x reader, Touya x reader

Fluff, angst, AU

Tigger Warning: Alcohol consumption, 18+ scene (if you don’t want to read smut then read up to the line 😊)

Word count: 5.7K

A/N: So much love on the first chapter already???? I really don’t deserve it. Sorry for the late update! I was trying to work on the last scene and wanted to make it so good for you guys. Don’t come for me if its mediocre. I’m still learning on how to write those kinds of scenes! Let me know if you want to be on the taglist! 

Summary: Being quirkless wasn’t so bad. Especially when you had two badass best friends that had amazing quriks to make up for it. That is until one of them breaks your heart by disappearing in thin air. And the other breaks your heart by wanting to focus on his hero work. After coming back to Japan after studying abroad for 5 years, you were in for a whirlwind of surprises.

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8]

You stared up at the man that saved you. Takami Keigo.

He had set you down safely, away from the fight, but didn’t glance at you a single time. Once he set you down, he was already rescuing another victim. He was fast. Flying to move others out of the way from falling debris. He even utilized his feathers to separate from his wings to do the same. Wow, where did he learn to do that? You were mesmerized by how swift and powerful he had become. But now wasn’t the time to daydream. You had to go to work. And now you were late.

Cursing in your head, you got up, dusted yourself off and continued on your way to work. But then you halted. You looked back at Keigo, watching him fight that villain. Maybe you should wait and thank him for saving you. He didn’t know he was saving you though. He didn’t look at you. He was just saving anyone he could at the moment. It would probably just be an awkward encounter anyway. You decided against it, but you couldn’t help but think about him, your heart racing just a bit.

You arrived at the school just in time. And that was all because you started running. You entered the teacher’s lounge where a meeting was about to begin. You sat down and greeted the other teachers around you before the principal of the school went to the front to start the meeting.

“Thank you all for being here so early. Let’s discuss today’s meeting. As you all know, it’s the first day of the term. Not very exciting but let’s still follow protocol.” The principal announced. Nods were seen coming from everyone, understanding that nothing new is happening. “But this year we are going to do something a little different. Every year, we have heroes come in to give speeches about their hero life and what students without quirks can contribute to hero society. This year, we are going to have that speech on the first day to give students more motivation to start the year off.” He explained. You nodded your head as well, fascinated that this is what they do in schools now. You jotted down some notes to save for later. The principal continued on with the meeting. Instructions seemed basic enough. Nothing too outrageous or out there. You were nervous for you first day for nothing.

“Before you all leave to your homeroom classes, let me introduce you to the heroes,” the principal gave the final announcement. All eyes turned to the door as a flood of heroes walked in and stood in the front besides the principal. A chorus of ‘oohs’ and ‘ahhs’ filled the room upon seeing how strong and intimidating they were. You also ogled at the pro-heroes in front of you. You could tell it was going to be an interesting first day. Before the principal could finish introducing all the heroes, the front door swung open, causing a loud noise to fill the room. Immediately, all eyes were back on the front door at whoever just barged in.

“Hawks, you’re late.” One of the other pro-heroes said in a disappointed, authoritative tone.

“Sorry captain. Villain fight, if you know what I mean,” he jokingly informed the other pro-hero in a sarcastic tone of voice. He laughed it off while the other heroes kind of just rolled their eyes. When he was finished with his little antics, Hawks looked at the audience and looked at each teacher in the eye.

“Hawks. Nice to meet everyone,” he introduced himself. When he got to you, his eyes froze. You refused to meet his eye and looked away for the rest of the meeting. But you could feel his stare on you.

“Alright, meeting dismissed. Teachers, you can go to your classrooms. I’ll send you your assigned heroes in a bit.” The principal gave the final word and dismissed everyone. You quickly gathered your materials and bolted out of there, actively avoiding a certain blonde hero.

You anxiously wait in your homeroom class. Not because you were nervous about meeting the kids for the first time, but because you were anxious about which hero was assigned to your class to guest speak. A knock could be heard on your door and you quickly open it. Blonde hair properly groomed to the side. His outfit was made out of jeans from hear to toe. With a sigh of relief, you let the hero in. It wasn’t Keigo. Now you could relax without all the nerves messing you up through the day.

 You rolled your head in circles and massaged you shoulders. Man, it was a long first day. Fun and exciting, but definitely long. After the heroes gave their speeches to the students, they immediately left to focus back on their hero work. Good, because that meant you didn’t have to run into Keigo accidentally. You sighed and packed up your bag, ready to relax back at your apartment. Before you could escape your workplace, a female coworker wrapped their arms around your shoulder.

“Hey newcomer. Leaving already?” she asks. You look behind your shoulder and gave a curt nod. She pouted at your lack of response. “Aw, too bad. Well, everyone’s going out for drinks and a bit of dancing. Wanna join?”

“Right now? It’s barely dark out,” you question their thought process and look outside the window. The sun was still bright in the sky. I guess the sun was about to set, but not for another hour or two. “I guess it couldn’t hurt.” You mumbled to yourself. But your coworker heard you loud and clear. She was already smiling from ear to ear.

“Great! Let’s go!” she grabbed you by the arm and dragged you out of there, right behind the rest of your coworkers.

“Ah, but, I’m still in my work clothes,” you stuttered and looked down at your outfit. You were dressed pretty nice for your first day, but still. Going out in your work clothes was just not it. You could already feel the stares of strangers looking at you weirdly.

“We all are! It’s a company dinner. No one’s going to say anything,” she reassured you. And she was right. Looks like this was a regular thing in Japan. There were several groups of people wearing business casual or business formal attire at the place you were drinking at. It was more like a club. There were private rooms for big crowds, as well as a bar, a dance floor and a DJ. An interesting setting but no one else seemed effected by the atmosphere. Everyone was taking shots or taking sips of their drinks, laughing and having a good time.

You got to play some drinking games with your coworkers and got to know them within a short period of time. Drinking, even just a little bit, just brings out the chatter box in you. You usually only drink enough to have fun, but you were having a great time. You forgot about today’s events and just started living in the moment. Some of the male coworkers sang their hearts out to karaoke. You were shocked and appalled that the principal was also joining in. But you were all having fun, where’s the harm in that?

At the bar, Hawks was ordering a whiskey on the rocks. He put his drink to his lips, slowly drinking it with his arms resting on the countertop looking over at the people on the dance floor. He doesn’t usually come out to the bars. It was once in a blue moon, maybe even rarer. He didn’t have time to mess around nor was he really interested in crowds like this. But he had to figure out how to get someone out of his head. You. He had to get you out of his head. Hawks was not prepared to see you today. He wasn’t expecting or anticipating it. Seeing you took him completely off guard. Hell, he didn’t even know you were back in Japan. Dammit. And if it wasn’t enough, you avoided him. You actively refused to look at him and fuck did that sting like a motherfucker. Ah well, at least you guys won’t be bumping into each other often. Or so he thought.

You were currently being dragged to the dance floor with a few of your female coworkers. All of you surrounded yourselves with each other and formed your own little circle. At first you were shy. You knew how to get down when you were overseas but you weren’t sure if Japan shared the same energy. When you felt comfortable and safe enough, you started swaying your hips to the music. Letting the music take over your body and let’s be honest, you also let the alcohol do the talking. Eventually, you were dancing like it was nobody’s business, dancing with all the ladies around you.

Hawks cocked an eyebrow as he saw you dancing. You looked different. You looked… more carefree. Independent. Confident. And he can safely say that you were very much attracting him. His eyes traveled your body as you swayed your hips to the beat and even swayed against the other women that were with you. You were teaching your coworkers a few moves you picked up at college in the States and god damn was it sexy to watch. The way your work skirt hugged your ass was already catching his eye. But he couldn’t look away when you started to move your ass up and down, twerking on one of your coworkers. That coworker was embarrassed but played along but you eventually laughed it off.

You were having so much fun letting loose. When you turned around with a wide smile on your lips, you spotted a winged blondie looking your way. Keigo. You couldn’t tell if your heart was racing from the alcohol or if it was from seeing your ex again. But a thought came to your mind. Maybe it was the alcohol. You smirked to yourself and started to dance sexier. Keigo broke your heart to become a hero and because you didn’t have a quirk. Well you were going to show Hawks what this quirkless teacher can do and what he’s been missing out on.

You made eye contact with said hero and moved your body in a way that would attract anyone’s attention. You moved your hands up and down your body as you rolled your hips, feeling yourself to the music. Hawks scoffed and admired the show you were giving him. In one shot, he down the whiskey in his cup and forcefully set it down on the counter behind him. His predatory eyes were on you and only you. Hawks made his way towards you but before he could get to you, another man was rubbing himself on you.

Amidst your dance, you felt a pair of rough hands grab your waist and tug you backwards so that your body was flushed against someone’s chest. A hot breath met your left ear, making you shudder in fear. You tried to push his hands off you but to no avail. That just made him tighten his grip.

“Come on, dance with my pretty lady,” he disgustingly whispered in your ear. Your coworkers didn’t notice anything yet since everyone was dancing in the moment. And it was hard to tell that someone was touching you since the dance floor was filled with people and flushed bodies were everywhere. You were in a predicament. You wanted to say something but before you could, his grip magically let go. Turning your head, you saw Hawks grabbing the stranger’s wrist in a death grip.

“This pretty lady doesn’t look like she wants to dance with you,” he commented, eyes looking unamused. The man groaned at how tight his grip was but tried to fight him back. By this time, Hawks was already squeezing his body between you two, so that the man couldn’t get to you.

“Fuck off man,” the stranger shouted, swinging his free hand to aim at Hawks’ face. But Hawks was already one step ahead of him. He easily caught the man’s fist. But it made Hawks more furious. He spread his wings wide as a warning, scaring you, the pervert and everyone around you. He was careful enough to not hit anyone but it was still intimidating. This scared the man and he finally fled, going straight to the exit. When he deemed it was safe enough, he let his wings go back to their resting position. Taking a big, deep breath out, he turned to face you. You, still shocked, looked up at him. You both just stared at each other and everyone around you continued doing them.

“Are you okay?” he asked, concern written all over his face.

“Mm,” you hummed, looking down in embarrassment. “Thanks…” Your mood was ruined now. All because of some horny guy you couldn’t keep his hands to himself.

“You don’t look it,” Hawks commented, sensing your change of mood. You were grateful for what he did, of course. But now was not the time. You felt upset and violated that you just wanted to go home now.

“Look, Kei- ah, Hawks. I’ll be fine. Excuse me,” you excused yourself from his presence and approached one of your coworkers.

“Hey, I’m gonna head home now!” you told her, yelling loud enough so that she could hear. You could see the disappointment in her face but didn’t stop you. She acknowledged you and then went back to having fun. Giving one last look of appreciation to the hero of the night, you made your way out the door and into the cool, night air.

 Chills ran down your spine. You were not expecting it to be this cold out. And what’s worse, your head was still foggy from drinking so much at the bar. A sigh left your lips as you tried to pay attention and just focus on getting home. Once you got home, then could you finally relax and re-energize for work. And you could do that once you got a little birdie off your shoulder. You stopped in your tracks and sighed.

“Are you really following me?” you asked aloud. If there were passersby, they would think you were crazy for talking to yourself. Hawks came down from a nearby building, landing right in front of you with a sheepish smile on his face.

“You knew?”

“It was hard not to when I could hear to flapping your wings this whole time,” you explained. You put your hands on your hips in a disapproving manner. “Go home. I can walk by myself.” Hawks cleared his throat and straightened up, his wings moving along with him. Wow, they were bigger than you remember.

“Heroes have to make sure that the citizens stay safe from danger. You drank. And you’re walking alone in the middle of the night. I was just making sure you got home safe. You know, cause that’s my job. As a hero.” God, he was so awkward.

“Got it. Well if you want to walk me home, you’re gonna have to exchange it for your jacket,” you said, pointing to the brown jacket that he was wearing. You already knew Hawks wasn’t going to leave you alone, no matter how many times you tell him that you’re okay. So you took advantage of this opportunity to at least get some warmth on the way. Hawks smirked and handed you his jacket with no hesitation. And so you began to walk back to your apartment together.

Silence. Dead silence between you two. It was so awkward. Maybe you shouldn’t have said anything so that you could walk home in peace. But it was too late to think about that because now you were in this situation. Should you say something? What do you even say? What do you even talk about? Oh, how’s life after breaking my heart in high school? Please… that was 5 years ago. You couldn’t believe you were still salty about it. Believe it or not, Hawks was thinking the same thing. He didn’t know what to bring up. Does he bring up the past? Or does he bring up what he saw at the club? There was no point in asking ice breaker questions. Shit, so what does he bring up? And so you continued to walk in silence until you finally reached you apartment. You spun around and handed Hawks his jacket back.

“Thanks for the escort back. And… thanks for what happened back there,” you thanks him, embarrassed that that even happened.

“Always a pleasure,” he responded. Awkward silence. You bit the inside of your cheek. Man, this was really killing you.

“Well, good night,” you bid your farewell. Opening your door, you enter your apartment and was about to close the door when Hawks stuck his foot out to prevent you from closing it all the way. You open your door back up and look at him with a questioning look.

“Can we talk?” he asks.

“Oh,” that took you by surprise. “About what?” Hawks was hesitant to say.

“Us?” he asks like even he is questioning his decision.

“What’s there to talk about? It was a while ago and-”

“I know. I know but… I feel like I should apologize and explain for um, what happened so,” he said. It took a lot for him to swallow his pride but he had to do this. He had to make this right. It took you a second to process his request because you were not expecting that at all. You had two choices: either leave it alone and let the past be the past or clear up the ‘misunderstandings’ between you two? Well, it couldn’t hurt to choose the latter. You moved your body to the side and opened the door wider.

“Come on in, it’s cold.” You offered and Hawks gladly accepted.

He sat on your couch while you quickly went to make him a hot cup of tea. You set the tea on the coffee table in front of him and sat next to him, putting a throw pillow on your lap. You looked at him, waiting for him to start first. Hawks took a deep breath and faced you.

“I don’t even know where to start,” he confessed, giving a small laugh. You shifted in your seat, hugging the pillow tighter.

“Mmm, I guess… why did you break up with me?” you asked, not having the confidence to look at him anymore. You were opening up old wounds and started to feel some type of way.

“I didn’t want to break up with you, y’know? But when I thought about the future and aspired to be this great hero, I knew that you were going to have a difficult time. You were going to be hurt either way, so I guess. I don’t know. Decided to end it early before it got to that point?”

“And so you decided to be an ass to me?” you looked at him annoyed now. No matter what his reasons were, valid or not, his behavior was inexcusable to you.

“I’m sorry. I thought that if I treated you that way then you’d have an easier time moving on.”

“That’s the most cliché thing ever,” you pouted angrily, playing with the ends of the pillow. If he would have talked to you, then maybe you guys could have come to a compromise or met in the middle. Only if he would have talked and listened to you then this probably wouldn’t have happened. Dumb Keigo. Always trying to think about others but hurting them in the process. You couldn’t help but feel angry at his explanation. So much to the point where you were blinking the tears away. Hawks was staring at you this whole time and noticed the tears in your eyes and how you were trying to hard for them not to fall. When a single tear did finally escape, he cupped your cheek, rubbing the tear away.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I hurt you,” he apologized, barely above a whisper. You put your hand over his and looked up into his eyes. He must have moved closer to you because his face was just inches from yours.

“I’m fine. I kinda got over it a while ago,” you said, matching how soft his voice was.

“Let me make it up to you.” He suggested.

“How are you going to do that?” you looked up at him. His eyes could be seen wandering down the features of your face, landing on your lips that were slightly parted. He chuckled and he continued to stare at your lips.

“I mean, I know one way.” Then he looked back at your eyes. “If you’d let me.” He was asking permission. His eyes were more seductive and his voice went an octave lower. And it was turning you on. Hawks saw in your eyes that you were feeling the same way yet you didn’t say anything. He took this opportunity to slowly lean into you, ready to back away if you gave a signal. But you didn’t move. The closer he got, the lowers your lids got. By the time your eyes were fully closer, his lips met yours in a soft kiss. Not too light but not too forceful either. It was nice. He pulled away just barely. You could feel his breath on yours still as he broke away from the kiss. There was a pause. He was waiting for you to maybe back away or smack him but it never came. Taking that as a good sign, he went back in for another kiss, you kissing him back just as hard.

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The kiss between you started out innocent and loving. But got hungrier and needier by the second. You attacked his lips like your life dependent on it. Hawks was leaning more into you, both arms on either side of you entrapping you between the couch and him. One hand gripped on his forearm and the other laid on top of his chest. Your nails softly and slowly raked his chest, causing a reaction out of him, nipping at your lower lip. Hawks was getting frustrated at the lack of contact because of the pillow that was still in your lap.

“Let’s get rid of this,” he quickly said, taking the pillow and throwing it aimlessly across the room. You giggled by how aggressive and eager he was to get it out of the way. But you couldn’t even bare to have his lips leave yours, even for that quick second. Your hands cupped his face, brining him closer, afraid that if you let go he could disappear, and kissed him again. Hawks smirked into the kiss, pressing his body on yours. The bulge in his pants prominent as his hips met yours. You moaned into the kiss when you felt his hard on press firmly onto your clit. Hawks took his opportunity to slide his tongue in your mouth. His wet muscle fought yours for dominance and explored every part of your mouth. Sucking, licking, pulling. Hawks couldn’t get enough. And he wanted more.

He detached his mouth from yours, a trail of saliva still connecting your tongues together. And went straight to attacking your neck. He wasted no time in leaving marks all over you neck, shoulder and chest. He sucked on the sensitive skin, biting it from time to time. It was painful but fuck did it feel so good. When he was done with one hickey, he licked it to ease the pain a bit but then immediately went to make another one. You probably should have stopped him because you didn’t want your coworkers or your boss to see them. But you didn’t want him to stop.

Your hands got tangled within his blonde locks while Hawks was grabbing hold of your waist, his hands impressively untucking your shirt to show a little bit of skin. You moan which causes him to growl in satisfaction. Oh god that was so sexy. The growl in his voice sent shock waves straight to your pussy. You were getting wetter and wetter by the second. You could feel yourself clenching around nothing and that was soon to change. God, how you wanted more of him right now. Grabbing his face, you brough him in for another dominating kiss. Hawks removed his hands from your waist and moved it to your thighs. Your skirt riding up nice and easy for him. He grabbed your thigh, forcefully hooking your leg to wrap around his waist to get better access to your ass.

He’s squeezing your ass, definitely leaving bruises to be found the next morning. And as much as he loved the taste of your lips, right now, he wanted to go back to attacking your sensitive neck. And that’s what he did. Your breathing became uneasy and turned into deep pants. Was it getting hotter in here? Because your body was growing hotter by the second. Luckily, Hawks was always one step ahead. His hands started to unbutton your white blouse. When it got halfway, he just takes both sides of your blouse and rips it open impatiently. It was taking too long and he was too needy to wait.

“Keigo,” you whined, playfully hitting his shoulder.

“I’ll buy you another one,” he said in a rush. Because he wasted no time in cupping your breasts, admiring the black laced bra you wore. As if he hadn’t eaten in weeks, he devoured your breasts in his mouth. He buried his face, sucking and leaving marks on the mounds of your breasts. He could spend a good time there because fuck, your tits were so perfect. You moaned as you felt the bulge on his pants grow even bigger. That wasn’t helping the friction you needed oh so badly down there. You tried lifting your hips to make contact with his boner but he had to strapped down so you could barely move.

“Keigo,” you cooed his name. “I want more.” You pleaded. He let go of one of your breasts with a loud pop and shushes you.

“Patience little birdie. I promise I’ll make you feel good,” he promises. He continues to massage your breasts, peppering kisses all over your cleavage.

Finally giving you what you want, his hand reaches lower until its right above your clit. You moan in pleasure as he teases your clit with his middle finger. One long stride going from your clit all the way down to your dripping core.

“Fuck, you’re already so wet,” he says, moving your panties to the side to reveal your dripping pussy. Hawks uses his middle finger to gather your juices and gently enters it in you. “Shit, look at that. I didn’t even need to prep you. Your pussy just took in my finger so well.” His mouth was watering watching you completely take his fingers with ease. But it was only one finger. Slowly, he added another finger and then another. Hawks was careful to make sure that he wasn’t hurting you. So every time he entered another finger, he would glance up and see if your facial expression changed. When you had adjusted to all three fingers in you, Hawks moved his fingers slowly. Pumping his fingers in an agonizingly slow pace, making sure he felt every inch of your walls. It was driving you mad. His fingers were finally in you but you were still craving more.

In an attempt to make him go faster, you used your free hand to grab the bulge in his pants. In the same agonizing pace he was going, you stroked his cock up and down through his pants. Hawks bit his bottom lip to prevent himself from moaning from your touch, but you heard it. He groaned, his voice vibrating from deep within his throat. But that seemed to do the trick. The faster he fingered you, the faster you pumped his cock. Moans were coming out of your mouth nonstop. His fingers kept hitting the perfect spot. And it didn’t help that he curled his fingers to add to the effect. Your head was in a daze, feeling your first orgasm coming. Your grip on his cock was softening because you were in such a euphoric state to continue. The moans coming out of your mouth became silent as the orgasm washed over you, your legs trembling. Hawks could feel you clench hard around his fingers, but he wasn’t stopping. He was going to help you ride it out until you couldn’t handle it anymore.

You were coming down from you high and now you were craving one thing. You needed his dick in your mouth. This time, you took the initiative. You pushed his shoulders back so that he was comfortably sitting back on the couch. You kneeled in front of him, already unbuckling his belt. While you were busy taking his pants off, Hawks got rid of the rest of his clothing and threw it somewhere around the room.

You got his pants down to his ankles and revealed his thick, throbbing cock. Precum was already dribbling on the side. Gripping his cock with one hand, you teased him by leaving one long lick, collecting the precum on your tongue. Several curses were being thrown by the winged man but you wanted to keep teasing him. You licked the tip of his dick where more precum was oozing out. Then you wrapped your lips fully around the tip, but just the tip. You pulled up, kissing the tip which made Hawks go crazy. His head was thrown back and his hands were gripping his hair. Seeing that view, you think you did enough teasing to him. Liking your lips in anticipation, you sunk your mouth all the way down his length.

“(y/n)!!!” Hawks screamed your name. His hands instinctively went straight to your hair. You were expecting him to push down on you to take as much of him in your mouth as you can but it didn’t come. Instead, he gathered all your hair in one hand, holding it up for you. But his grip was strong enough to leave pleasure running down your spine. You looked up to see him already eyeing you and how full your mouth was with his dick and his dick alone. Drool was coming down the side of your mouth. At that sight, Hawks’ mouth was left agape.

“Look at that pretty mouth,” he complimented you. If you could smile, you would. But your mouth was already full, preventing you from doing so. So, you hummed in response. The vibrations of your mouth sent Hawks over the edge and he couldn’t take it anymore.

“Fuck, come here,” he takes you off his dick and before you know it, you were straddling his waist, being lifted into the air. “Where’s your room?” he breathed.

“Down the hall to the left,” you breathed back. Your lips connected to one another once again. He carries you down the hall, kicks open your door and throws you on the bed. Before you could process what was happening, Hawks was spreading your legs wide open. He completely removed your panties and your skirt so that your glistening pussy was open and ready for him. He pinned your legs down so you couldn’t squirm around or close your legs shut. Taking one big whiff of your essence, blush rushed to your cheeks. You couldn’t help but cover your face at such an embarrassing act.

“Come on little birdie. Why are you covering your face,” he teased, his lips lightly brushing against your folds.

“I’m embarrassed…”  you admitted. Hawks smirked and made you uncover your face.

“Don’t be. I wanna see your face scrunch up in pleasure when I eat you out,” he said. As soon as he finished that statement, he was devouring your pussy like there was no tomorrow. He slurped up all your flowing juices. Tongue exploring every part of you, leaving no place untouched. The noise that he was making was so sinful. But it turned you on even more. It wasn’t long before he could control himself. He gave you one last lick and then spit on your pussy as a parting gift.

He pumped his cock a few times before lining it in front of your entrance. Slowly, he sinks his cock into you, causing you both to moan in sync. Hawks takes is slow at first. Fully taking his cock out and filling you back up again. Then, out of nowhere, he’s ramming his cock in you, going at an impressive speed. Moans filled the room. They were so loud, you were certain that your neighbors could hear every tune coming out of your mouth.

“Fuck. So tight,” he grunts. Staying the same position, he puts your legs together and hugs them, gaining better access. His cock reaches deeper than before in this position. He hits that sweet spot that makes you roll your eyes back and made your back arch.

“Oh god, r-right there! Please fuck me right there!” you beg, already feeling another orgasm coming. He obeys, hitting the same spot over and over again until you’re seeing stars. Your pussy clenches so tight around his member that that was the last straw. He pulls out and is soon cumming all over your chest and stomach. Both of you are a panting, sweaty mess. While you were both coming down from your high, Hawks leans over and bumps your foreheads together. You take that moment to just be in each other’s presence.

“Um, Keigo?” you call out his name. He snaps his eyes to you. “I’m sticky.” You inform him. Immediately, he gets up from the bed in a panic.

“Oh shit shit shit shit,” he kept repeating and runs to find the bathroom. When he comes back, he has a wet towel in hand to clean up the mess he made on you. He throws the towel in the dirty laundry basket that was by your door and lays down next to you on the bed.

“That was-” he starts.

“yeah…” you finish. There was no deny that that quick sex session was absolutely amazing. And there were absolutely no words to describe how good it felt. You both looked at each other and laughed, cuddling closer together.

“Can I stay the night?” he asks. His hand moves the hair out of your face and then cups your cheek.

“Yes please.”

Tagged: @ditu-m9 @snuckerfrcnicken @flowersgirl02 @bestgirlkonan

[imo-chan-imagines]

『 Haikyuu!! Week 2020 | Day 2 』

· Sept. 26th → One Ball, Heart and Soul ·

Characters: Sawamura Daichi, Testurou Kuroo, Bokuto Koutarou, Ushijima Wakatoshi, Oikawa Tooru, Terushima Yuuji

Prompts: A. favourite position/role + B. travel/journey

Tags/warnings: Haikyuu!! (anime), PG, fluff, crack, headcanons, HaikyuuWeek2020

A/N: I found it so hard to pick a favourite position/role, because they're all so interesting and important, and I love everyone 😭 But I settled on the role of captain because of the headcanons I thought of. Captain Sqaud, assemble! So, want to find out what these boys are like on a road trip?

(Just to be clear, I do love all these guys. None of this is hate 😂) All my Haikyuu Week 2020 posts will be SFW, but I have some NSFW stuff on my blog, too. Feel free to check that out~ Thanks for reading! Please enjoy ♡ Imo~

☆ Sawamura Daichi ☆

Dad-chi™

Comes prepared with all the food, drinks, snacks, med kit, camera – literally everything you could possibly need on a road trip

Plans out the route beforehand down to the tiniest detail nothing gets past this man

As well as multiple backup routes in case there's diversions etc.

Plans for regular breaks at two-hour intervals where everyone can pee, stretch their legs, buy anything they need, etc.

He's the one who's driving he's not letting anybody else get a scratch on his van, lmao

And he's good at it

No speeding he's a cop, y'all but he doesn't dawdle either, no running red lights, turns corners well, keeps an even foot on the gas, etc.

Just a good time, tbh

Nobody is getting car sick because of him that would be a damn disgrace

"Stop fighting right now, or I'm turning this van around"

And will actually do it if you don't stfu, lmfao

Don't even think about making a mess and dropping your rubbish in the van you'll be walking home

Everyone else thinks his music is boring and for old people, but Daichi honestly doesn't care

Besides, it's either that or no music at all, because he needs to concentrate on the road

He takes this shit seriously. People's lives are in his hands, dammit!

☆ Testurou Kuroo ☆

Likes to switch between driving and riding shotgun/being designated navigator

Is fairly decent at both

Is constantly eating something but, like, he probably doesn't even know what it is

Some kind of edible is shoved towards his mouth by whoever's riding shotgun, and in it goes shut up. Not like that, you cretins 😂

Somehow manages to behave like an overbearing grandparent and an overexcited child at the same time?? Nothing new there, I guess 😂

I'm sorry, Kuroo, I love you. Please don't be mad 😭

Has a banging playlist full of throwback songs from the 90s and early 2000s

Drums along sofly on the steering wheel or dashboard constantly

HATES driving in rain he's low-key terrified he's going to aquaplane

Likes driving with the windows wound down and feeling the wind in his hair

Will plan the route, but then forget to save it/print it off, etc.

Cannot work Google Maps or SAT-NAVs to save his life Kenma, please help him

Actually packs properly balanced meals, but is heavy on the snacks, too

You'd think he'd drive too fast, but he's actually really responsible

Constantly telling dad jokes to try and keep people amused the groaners are the best

Would probably fight someone at the gas station if they started being a dick and causing trouble

Kuroo, baby. I love you, but please don't get arrested 😭😂😭

☆ Bokuto Koutarou ☆

Dear God, do NOT let him drive leave it to Akaashi, I'm begging you

Has really bad spacial awareness in a vehicle and drifts all over the place

Probably speeds without even knowing it, too

Likes to ride shotgun, but is a terrible navigator, so is nearly always made to ride in the back

Is the loud one that moves around too much and blocks the rear view mirror strap him in tight, Akaashi

Belts along at the top of his voice to whatever music is playing, he's not fussy

Was told to pack essential items in his backpack and proceeded to fill it with sweets and snacks and a pack of condoms??? and thought he did good

Bokuto: Bro, you said they were essential

Akaashi: NOT FOR EVERY SITUATION

Rarely ever has to pee, but when he does, it's always miles away from any service station, and he has to hold it for hours

Has definitely peed at the side of the road multiple times because he couldn't hold it any longer, but he wasn't even embarrassed as numerous cars zoomed past

Likes sticking his head out the window like a dog on the motorway which gives everyone else heart attacks

Like, get the hell back inside you maniac 😭

If the car has a sunroof, he's 100% standing up through it with his hands in the air just you try and stop him

And they will. Everyone will try

"HORSES!!"

Will get out of the car in traffic jams to find out what's going on and end up chatting with random strangers until it starts moving again

And he's very sad when he has to leave his new friends. Droopy hair and emo Kou for the next 2 hours :(

Unironically enjoys playing 'I Spy' for hours at a time

Is a bit much to handle in such a confined space for hours on end, but he's just so excited for the road trip

Will fall sound asleep in a matter of minutes if you set him up with a travel pillow and it's freaking adorable!!

☆ Ushijima Wakatoshi ☆

No music whatsoever it's distracting. Why would he want it?

Okay driver, brilliant paper-map navigator

Will sit and do absolutely nothing but stare out the window the entire trip if he's neither

Breaks too hard and accelerates too fast, though

Is also kind of heavy-handed with the gear stick he may or may not have snapped one off before...

Never give him a SAT-NAV, though, because he will follow the directions with 100% accuracy and end up driving through a wall or some shit don't try and deny it

Does he ever even blink when he's looking at the road? We may never know

Might be astral projecting, who knows

Forgets people need toilet breaks but refuses to make unscheduled stops

"Just hold it in"

Uh-huh, sure. That's how that works, Toshi

No snacks

Or rather, no fun snacks. Protein bars and mineral water all the way, babyyyy 🙃🙃🙃

Could probably drive all through the night without taking any breaks but that's irresponsible

Don't do it, kids

Will likely devour the entire KFC menu at the service station he's big, okay? He eats a lot

Is prone to leg cramp after long drives oh look, he needs a massage 😏

Doesn't get car sick. Ever. Upset stomachs are for the weak

Has garbage and recycling pouches on the backs of the front seats use them correctly, or feel his wrath

Isn't exactly a barrel of laughs, but it's somehow endearing just like always *happy sigh*

But it's actually a good thing

There's no hidden side to Ushi or any bad or annoying habits that come out of the woodwork on a long road trip

He's just the same old reliable, adorably straightforward Ushijima ❤

☆ Oikawa Tooru ☆

Calls shotgun and demands the aux cord every. Single. Time but it's pretty decent music, so no-one really complains

Not that he's any good at navigation pray for Iwa-chan

Is constantly taking selfies, making TikToks, and documenting the trip on his social media

#ROADTRIP #SQUAD GOALS #BETTER THAN YOU

Will send all the photos in the group chat when it's over, and they actually come out pretty well

Will not stop complaining if the air conditioning is busted and Iwa-chan will threaten to dump him in the middle of nowhere if he doesn't can it 😂

Iwa-chan: I shoulda left you on that street corner where you were standing

Oikawa: But'cha dIDN'T

Bonus points if you get that reference, lmao

Has to keep taking breaks because his butt hurts when he sits down for too long because it's fLaT

I'm sorry, Tooru 😭😭 Forgive me. I love you, really

Is constantly on his phone

But he points out pretty views and interesting sights to everyone all the time awww

Low-key needs to pee all the time, but gets defensive if someone brings it up please stop bulling him, travelling is hard

"Are we there yet?"

Seems kind of annoying, but is actually just genuinely excited to go on a road trip and spend time with his friends 😭😭

Buys matching souvenirs for everyone in secret to surprise them with 🥺

When people complain about all the photos, souvenirs, and enthusiasm, etc. and ask why he has to keep doing it, Oikawa says:

"I want to remember as much of this as possible. I want us all to remember as much of this as much as possible," with a sweet little smile 😭😭😭

And that's when everyone realises how mean they've been to him about being over-the-top and irritating, and they all feel terrible

Just like in the freaking anime, man

☆ Terushima Yuuji ☆

Will hijack the aux cord to play his incredibly niche music taste

Feet up on the dashboard when he rides shotgun

Shoes on is bad enough, but shoes off just stinks up the entire car you have to roll all the windows down, lmfao

Will break all sorts of road laws if you let him behind the wheel please don't

Daichi will come and arrest him 😭😭

Lives on energy drinks

That's all the drinks he packs. Nothing else

Travels in sports wear and sliders yes, even though you reallly shouldn't drive in sandals

Like he knows or cares 😭

Will chat to girls at the gas station and ask for their numbers, even though he's never going to see them again

"You never know, man! It could be, like, fate or something"

Yes, Yuuji, you do. And it's 'or something'

Thinks it's a good time to sext his current booty call because, like, he has hours of free time. What else is he going to do?

Probably forgot to pack actual food

Has to live off of snacks and cheap service station food for the duration of the trip

But not his own snacks, of course. Everyone else's one doesn't keep friends and buy one's own snacks

Genuinely doesn't realise if he's being gross or annoying, so let him down lightly like a bro and he'll probably make an effort to stop

Doesn't plan the route or anything, even if he's driving. Just punches it into Google Maps as he sits his ass down on the day and trusts it to get him there in one piece and on time

Entire Johzenji team: Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death...

For some reason knows how to change a flat tire, though, so he's good for something, I guess 😂😂

Probably saw a YouTube video on it. Maybe a WikiHow article

Somehow still manages to be an endearing part of the trip??

He smiles a lot and makes a lot of jokes, particularly when things go wrong, so it keeps everyone's spirits up

It definitely wouldn't be the same without him

© imo-chan-imagines 2020

[prince-eon]

• We’ll Figure It Out • ➥ h. hotel

[ Husk / Reader ]

I made this on a whim because why the fuck not. First story published, not first time writing. GLHF, never written for Husk before but it’s an adventure we can experience together. Also, yes, this was based off of “The Stray” comic by Disteal.

— TL;DR : Some soft Husk shit. The server is a sin. Not really used to writing Husk sorry. Based off of “The Stray”

Pre-Warnings: Just some slight angst with some fluff in it ; a tiny smidge of self-loathing ; more of a platonic thing but if you squint you can see the intimacy

God damn was it fucking freezing. Who knew that Hell would have such blistering winters, then again, it was hell so what the fuck did you expect? The weather here was nothing short of imperfection, choosing to be either sweltering hot or a blistering cold. Even if there were good days, they were short in stock as this place did its best to live up to its name.

Tonight, as you’ve noticed by your numb hands and probably already frozen face, it was freezing tonight, and it just so happened that you were walking home. Today was your birthday, and you had just spent the entire day out alone drinking away your sorrows and passing out at the docks of Lake Wendigo. It wasn’t your brightest idea to go outside in this weather, especially with such a thin sweater on, but it also wasn’t the worst thing you’ve done.

You walked on, staring down at your phone as you message Rosie on what your next job would be for tomorrow. All week you’ve had nothing assigned for you to do and you were tired of sitting around. It made you anxious and adding that on top of the growing pile of depression of your birthday just made you feel all the worse.

 Hey mother      

When’s the haul coming in?      

Read      

 You frowned at the ‘read’ underneath your message. A cloud of white left your lips when you sighed in frustration. Why hasn’t she replied yet? You’re sure you’ve taught her enough on how to use a phone, that and she was a fast learner, so there was no way she’d have trouble texting you back. A frown settled onto your face as you looked up to see the hotel.

This place was the bane of your existence, ever since Rosie sent you off to help Radio-bitch out to repay a favor. That was a month ago, and you were dreading every single second of it. The group of people that helped run this place or participated in the project behind it were complete morons. They were all so neurotic with their actions. It all made you feel awkward and out of place, so much so that you paused when you made it to the door, not moving an inch to reach out and grasp the handle to open it.

You stared holes into the brass piece, taking a glance behind you and questioning on whether you wanted to leave while you still could. It seemed so enticing to leave, go back to Rosie and forget like this place ever existed, back to your regular, daily, miserable life. You stared out down the walkway, going to take a step forward. That was until the doors opened to reveal a tall, skinny bitch.

“Well, look who decided to show up!” Alastor chirped from the doorway, smile ever present, “Come on in, my dear, tonight is a deathly cold night and you must be freezing!” He stepped forward, putting a hand to your back as he pushed you inside and closed the door. The warm air instantly met your skin, and it was only then that you realized just how cold you were.

“Ah, yeah..” You mumbled out, shoving your phone and hands inside your sweater’s pockets to help warm them up. You followed Alastor into the dining area to find everyone already gathered around the table. The atmosphere surrounding them was filled with a warmness that had you pausing in the doorway as Alastor walked back into the kitchen. Almost everyone had a smile on their face, seeming so casual and enjoying each other’s presence while you stood afar. You watched them all move with such up-beat energy that you nearly jumped out of your skin when Charlie shot up out of her seat and called out to you with a wide grin on her face.

“You’re late!” She exclaimed, grabbing your hand and pulling you over to the chair next to hers.

“Sorry, work kept me late.” You explained weakly, falling into your seat when Charlie pushed you to sit with a bit of force behind her action that had you lose your breath.

“That’s fine, Alastor just finished cooking anyway!” Charlie exclaimed, sitting down and smiling eagerly at you with an almost childlike glow to it, “He made your favorite!”

“Y-yeah… I see that.” You smiled awkwardly, looking away and watching as Niffty zoomed out of the kitchen with a large plate of food, one that you recognized so easily as the one your mother used to make when you were but a child. You watched as everyone reached out and started to serve themselves while Niffty kept zooming back and forth between the dining room and kitchen.

You stared out over the crowd, noticing that Vaggie and Angel were having their usual spat, yelling at each other about god knows what this time. Crymini had her feet on the table, leaning back in her chair as she stared down at her lap at the phone in her hand. She occasionally looked up to laugh at Razzle and Dazzle’s antics, who were currently messing with Baxter and getting such easy entertainment off his easy reactions (which involved a lot of screeching). Husk sat across from you, nursing from a bottle of tequila as he watched Vaggie get more heated by the second from Angel’s nonchalance. You briefly wondered if Charlie was ever going to step in, but it seemed that tonight she could care less as she involved herself in a deep conversation with Mimzy.

Upon all this chaos, you slowly dropped the smile on your face, a scowl replacing it as you stared down at the plate before you. You grimaced, the alcohol from earlier making your stomach twist at the thought of food. You shook your head, making it ache from the sudden movement as you moved your chair back to stand up. You moved to walk around the table, heading towards the door and tuning out the loud banter in the room. No one but Mimzy noticed, and when she called out to you, everyone stopped what they were doing for a short moment to look at you. 

“Hey! Where you going? You just got here and you’re leaving already?” She questioned, crossing her arms.

You paused in the doorway, glancing back at them, “I’m just gonna make a quick call. I’ll be back in a jiffy, don’t worry.” You explained, turning around and jumping back a bit when you almost ran into Alastor. You looked up at him, noticing the way he tilted his head in confusion down at you as he held another plate of your favorite meal. You said nothing other than an apology, moving your gaze to the ground as you stepped aside and continued your stroll to the exit. Not once did you ever notice the pair of eyes watching you.

You stepped back out into the cold, immediately feeling the cold hit your face. Your whole body shivered in response to the chill air of the night. It had you crossing your arms subconsciously in an attempt to save what little body heat you had. You looked around at your surroundings, checking to see if there were any unwanted presence around you. Last time you hadn’t checked the surrounding area of the hotel, a zeppelin blowed a hole into the entrance.

Shivering at the memory of bitch mc-gee’s show of power, you turned and began strolling around the building. You stared up at it and took in all its glory, every crevice, every detail. The place looked like it went through three hurricanes and back, or like dog shit. In simpler words, it looked run-down and awful, but you were sure that the twizzler would get it back up and running. If Rosie taught you anything, it was that when it came to Alastor, he could do some damn impressive things in his achieving ‘entertainment’ in his own means.

You scoffed at the thought. Never will you understand the fondness your dear Rosie had for the maniac. You rubbed your temples, trying to soothe the aching in your head, but it proved to be fruitless. Groaning in discomfort, you decided to focus ahead of you and where you were heading. The tall shadows casted by the hotel left little to see, but it was no issue to you when you finally reached the back alley.

The back of the hotel was your favorite hot spot and hide away to get away from everyone. It was your haven from the loud sounds of laughter and yelling provided from the patrons in there. Out here, you had the freedom to do whatever you wanted away from the scrutinizing eye of others. It was also a place to get your smoke on without having radio shack yell at you. Now that you think about it, having a quick smoke before heading back inside didn’t sound so bad, so without second thought you reached into your back pocket and pulled out the box of cigars you had along with your lighter.

You walked up to the brick wall of the hotel, leaning against it next to the back-exit while you pulled out a stick and lit the end of it. When it started smoking, you took a long drag out of it before pulling back and blowing a white cloud of smoke into the air. You watched it swirl and dance around for a moment, almost memorized by the way the cloud moved. It was only when the cloud of white disappeared that you allowed yourself to pull your phone out, opening messages and instantly tapping on Rosie’s name.

You huffed in annoyance as you noticed she had yet to message you back, “God fucking dammit…” You cursed under your breath, letting yourself fall ass-first to the ground in frustration. You leaned back against the wall, closing your eyes and breathing deeply to control your anger before you ended up punching a hole into the brick wall. You sat up again, pulling your phone up and starting to type a message to once more ask Rosie what she had wanted you to do. Not once did you notice the door open, nor the heavy footsteps coming closer to you until they called out to you.

 “Hey, kid.” A deep and husky voice spoke.

 You nearly jumped out of your skin, letting a few curses slip out as you almost dropped your phone. You snapped your head up, ready to cuss whoever decided to startle you out, but instead surprise replaced your anger as you saw the last person you’d expect to see out here. “Husk? What are you doing out here? Head back inside man, I’ll be done in a sec.”

He shrugged, bringing the bottle of tequila up to his lips, “Just getting some air.” Is all he said before taking a swig, throwing his head back and downing almost half the bottle in an instant.

“Oh.” Is all you said as you watched him drink before turning back to stare down at your screen.

Husk pulled the bottle back down, glancing down at you. He furrowed his brows at the look on your face as you typed out a message to whoever it was you were so focused on texting. He looked away to the bottle in his hand, taking small glances between you and his drink, wondering if whether he should even offer you a sip. He glanced back down to you, watching you smash your fingers onto the bright screen in frustration. He let out a sigh, taking a few steps towards you before plopping down adjacent to you.

You looked up, narrowing your eyes in suspicion of his actions, a small hint of confusion bubbled in the back of your mind. You opened your mouth, ready to tell him off, but he beat you to it by raising the bottle of tequila in offering to you, “Here, drink this. You’ll feel better.” He spoke.

You stared at him in surprise. It was known around the hotel staff that if there was one thing Husk would not separate from, it was his liquor. So, of course it was a shocker when he offered you that bottle. You closed your mouth, not saying anything or even daring to move, and that seemed to make him anxious. Husk thought he’d maybe made the wrong move, seeing as how you didn’t move or reply. He had half the mind to take back what he said, swallowing a pool of saliva in nervousness and opening his mouth to prepare to fix the awkward situation before it got worse. However, there was no need as you raised your hand and grasped the bottle, taking it from him.

“Thanks…” you replied, staring down at the bottle before taking a small sip and handing it back over to him. You tensed when your fingers brushed, feeling a pit of anxiety settle in your gut. You ignored it, however, and continued to stare down at your phone to read through what you’ve already typed down. A scowl formed on your face as you scrolled up to read through previous messages Rosie had sent your over the past month. Whether it was her telling you to listen to Alastor or to be good or to just wait for her instructions, it all had you huffing in anger.

A cold breeze passed through, making you shiver and hug yourself to savor body heat. You let out a sigh, leaning your head back to close your eyes again. The ambience of the area around the hotel filled your ears along with the occasional sound of liquid being jostled around inside a glass bottle. It was then that you realized the cat was still here. You furrowed your brows, suddenly not liking the silence that filled the air between you and Husk. It was thick with awkwardness, and it left you anxious in its wake.

“…it—” you started, glancing up at the cat demon next to you, “It’s just a bit too loud inside… and weird… I’m not really used to such a lively atmosphere, so…” You trailed off, turning your head away from him to avoid meeting his gaze, not that he cared. He didn’t even bother to look down at you, all he did was take a couple more swigs from his bottle while staring up at the dim pentagram in the dark red sky before speaking, “It’s okay, kid. You don’t have to explain yourself to me… I understand.”

Your face twisted in a slight grimace, “Yeah, it’s just really not my thing…”

Husk sighed in slight annoyance but dared not to say anything. Instead, he only shrugged as he looked down at the bottle in his hand. “I get it.” He replied, swirling the alcohol around in boredom.

You frowned, brows furrowing in frustration as you stared at the ground in irritation. A beat of silence settled between the both of you before you squared your shoulders, sitting straight and looking up at the cat in irritation. “See, I don’t think you do. I don’t think we’re really on the same page here.” You spat. You stood up, moving away from him and glaring out around the surrounding area. You took deep breaths in an attempt to control your anger. But it proved to be futile as when you turned around to glare at him, the look on his face that told you he could care less had your blood boiling.

“You all just go on doing all this stupid, kumbaya shit without a care in the world of the consequences.” You started, “You all have this sense of freedom within the hotel, a place that you all seem to call home with no trouble in doing so.” Your teeth were grit in disgust, the anger was building on your shoulders and you tried to keep it contained, but the bucket was overflowing, and it all spilled out and came undone.

“You all have it so easy, don’t you?! You get to walk around here without feeling the weight of the world on your shoulders! Well, I ain’t ever had that shit Husk! People like ME in my situation, in MY line of work are on a one-way conveyor belt to being screwed over and being complete fuck-ups!”

Your hands hurt from how tightly they were clenched. You could feel your claws digging into your flesh and spilling your blood in them. Anger and frustration were coursing through your veins as you had finally cracked under the pressure and stress of the month. The drawer was open, and you could do nothing but release all this pent-up stress by yelling at him. You didn’t know why you were doing it, especially to him out of all people, but all you wanted to do in that moment was to just be angry. And you wanted him to be angry back at you. You wanted him to fight, to yell, to scream at you and smash the bottle over your damn head for even having the gall to say such things in his face. But all he did was just look up at you with this disinterested look that pissed you off even more.

“We don’t GET big, happy, family stuff man! All we do is get moved around until our owners have an excuse to shoot us down!” You cried out in rancor, feeling tears starting to blur your vision as the water works finally unleashed themselves. You raised a hand, making sloppy work of trying to wipe them away. “All this, and you all just— fuckin— wanna make that all better and fix it like it’ll all go away…”

Your hand dropped, the cold air numbing your face even more as the hot tears continued to pour. You clenched your hands tightly and stared down into the ground with a look of distaste, “Don’t patronize me…” You mumbled out tiredly, “I’m not stupid, y’know. I know what cards I got dealt…” You crossed your arms, hugging yourself tightly, “…I know exactly how this will all play out in the end…”

Nothing was said when you finished, your rant was met with nothing but silence. You scowled, keeping your gaze on the ground and dared not to look up. If only you did, you would have seen Husk stare up at you in disbelief at the end of your spiel. Not once did he think that you'd crack under any of their presence, especially with him, and especially with how collected you always appeared to be. Your words were harsh, and to be honest it kind of pissed him off on how much you assumed that they all had better lives. True, here at the hotel everyone had a chance to let loose and be themselves just a bit more than they could out there. But despite that, he didn't let your assumptions or outburst get to him. All he did was huff in in nonchalance, moving to stand while taking another swig of his drink. 

You said nothing, only listening patiently to what Husk would do next. When he finally started moving, you flinched as you heard his heavy footfalls, each step had you dreading what would come next. You were almost afraid of him, your whole-body trembling when you noticed that he stopped just short of you. Not once did you dare look up at him, not wanting to see the look on his face after you just practically screeched him out. So, imagine your surprise when he lowered the bottle from his mouth, not to strike you with, but to speak words that had you tearing up again in an instant.

“I know exactly how you feel, kid.” He started slowly, “I mean, was just like you when I was younger.” You snapped your head up, staring up at him with an incredulous look on your face.. You opened your mouth to say something, but he beat you to it.

“I get it, y’know? I get that it seems like the world is out to trip you at every step. I get the anger when some random, unfair bullshit puts you back at square one.” He takes a quick gulp of his drink, staring up at the sky when he brought the bottle down, “I know how it feels when you think you gotta turn your back on the world, the thought that it can’t hurt you if you push it away.”

He turned his gaze down to you, a look in his eye that made you want to do nothing but cry right there and then for the rest of the night. He furrowed his brows at the tears rolling down your cheeks, “I also know you’re too young to survive that. Fighting the universe will kill you before it kills itself.”

He reached up a hand, going to wipe away a tear before you snapped your head away from his touch. You crossed your arms again as you glared daggers into the ground. “Why are you telling me this, man?!” You cried out in exasperation.

Husk huffed, shaking his head before turning back to you, “’Cause the worlds a shithole.” He started, “It’s hard and I can’t do anything to change that.” He raised his hand again, cupping your cheek and making you look up at him as he wiped away a tear. “But believe me when I say it’s harder when you’re fighting alone.”

He dropped his hand, turning around to face the door as if he were about to walk away, “You want me to leave, kid? I’ll leave. But I’m here offering you a hand…” He glanced back, “You give me the word, let me know you’re not ready to give up on us yet…”

    “Do that, and you never have to be alone again.”

  You said nothing, only staring at him and drowning in those warm pools that made up his eyes. There was something about them that just had you tearing up again. You couldn’t pull away, seeming in a trance and lost in the comfort they provided you. Your chest ached, and your heart throbbed at the way he seemed to look at you at that moment, and it wasn’t until you felt your phone vibrate in your pocket that you looked away.

You pulled out your phone, opening it up and watching the three dots float up onto the bottom of the screen, indicating that Rosie was finally replying to you.

 May I need to remind you that you are not needed tomorrow either?

You are such a busy bee.

Take some time for yourself.

 Her messages had you deflate a bit. You almost threw your phone down in anger if it wasn’t for the next one she sent. You stared at your screen, watching the white text bubble pop up at the bottom of the screen.

  Also, happy birthday love <3

   A choked sob left your mouth. The tears by now were waterfalls and were spilling down onto the screen of your phone and even down to the pavement below. You tried to wipe them away, having a hard time to see what was in front of you, but it proved futile as they only continued to pour. By now, you were a crying mess, the sorrow enveloping your mind along with the tears in your eyes making you blind to Husk’s movement. He walked over to you, stopping when he reached your side. He wasn’t sure what to do, raising his hand and lowering it multiple times while you sobbed an ugly mess. Husk only made a move when you finally collapsed to the ground knees first.

He rubbed the back of his neck, moving to kneel next to you. He opened a wing and wrapped it around you before pulling you close. You immediately caved into his hold, wrapping your arms around his neck and burrowing your mess of a face into his shoulder. He was startled at how easily you latched onto him and allowed your defenses to lower. You always had your walls up, never letting them down around others save for Rosie. But even then, it was rare you’d ever lose your composure. You were this stone-faced demon, almost relentless towards others, but in this very moment you were nothing but a young, small, feeble creature who was just as scared as the others in this damned place.

Husk couldn’t help but feel something nudge against his heart strings. He had this unrelenting force build up inside of him, something that wanted to keep you safe from all the bad things this world had to offer. He didn’t know why he felt that or what came over him, all he knew was that he never wanted to see you so distraught, so broken, ever again. It was that thought that had him wrapping an arm around you, giving you a few pats on your back and wincing when it seemed to make you cry harder.

He felt so uncomfortable in doing that, as if it had been decades since he had last comforted a crying person (which it had), but he made an effort to drown those feelings of discomfort and let you sob into his shoulder. You both stayed like that, your arms around his neck with your face buried into the surprisingly soft fur of his shoulder. His arms and wings wrapped around you in some form of comfort along with some protection against the cold. It was a while before you finally calmed down, enough to mumble out three simple words that would change your life.

   “…I need help…” you mumbled out.

Husk huffed, tightening his hold on you in some form of comfort as if letting you know that he’s there, and that he wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon.

  “Don’t worry, kid… we’ll figure it out… together.”

[lumiolivier]

The Good Old Days Chapter 29: A Walk of Shame Looks Good on You

A/N: Hi, friends! Look, I'm sitting here waiting for bleach to process, so I got a little time to kill. But before we get into anything fun, we need to take care of some business first. Nothing bad. It's just a little housekeeping before I leave for Michigan.

I know I said you'd be taken care of while I'm gone. Well, I lied. I thought you'd be taken care of, but I'm going to be away from my computer and away from my desk and you're going to have to wait a couple weeks until the next update, ok? I hope that's alright with you. I really did try, guys. I tried my damnedest. So, we'll be back in August. I promise. And I love you x

I’m pretty sure I left Veronica in capable hands. At least I sure as hell hope so. Once my shift came to an end, I wanted nothing more than to go home and crash. Granted, I knew I’d be up half the night, worrying about Veronica and hoping she made it home ok, but I’m sure she’ll be alright. If all else fails, she can kick ass with the best of them. And Tessa didn’t seem like the type to steal one of Veronica’s kidneys. I hope things work out with those two.

All I wanted now was to go home and crash, though. It’s been a long ass day. And a long ass night. And all I wanted was my bed. That sounded downright heavenly. And maybe a drink or two. Just a little something, something to cap off the night. It’s not like I got to have one with the Old Man. I was busy working the bar. Even though I wasn’t technically supposed to. But I digress. Still, a drink sounded nice. Both my brothers had their vices. César smoked like a chimney and I’m not sure how legal Tony’s vices were. I knew he kept them in the house, but I wasn’t going to tell anyone. I don’t think he even knew I knew.

Once I got home, I went straight into the bedroom and fell into my bed without a sound. Good. I could use about twelve hours of uninterrupted sleep. But I knew better than that. I took a quick hit from the tequila bottle and shut my eyes. In a perfect world, I wouldn’t just get that twelve hours of sleep, but I’d have something better in place of my body pillow. But I knew that wasn’t happening. Unless one of my brothers were stupid enough to try and be my little spoon. We were close, but we weren’t that close.

The next morning, I woke up to an empty house. Tony and César weren’t in their beds. Mama had already left for work. I wasn’t sure what to do with myself. The world was my oyster. At least this time, I didn’t wake up wanting to walk into oncoming traffic, so I got that going for me. And even with this new lease on life (despite me still wishing like hell that Vanessa as on the next flight home), I needed a way to kill the day before I had to go play in the Narrows.

Breakfast? Maybe I start with breakfast. And it happens to be eleven o’clock. I knew where I could get the best breakfast in the city. Just down the block. I threw my shoes on and headed toward that beautiful, bright green oasis in the middle of this concrete jungle. Dios los bendiga…I’m home. Well, I’d always feel at home in the city I loved, but this? This seemed a little more like home than I could’ve ever anticipated in my life.

“Buenos dias, niño!” Abuela greeted me. And right there. Right there was the cure for what ailed me. If only I had the energy to come here yesterday morning. Maybe I wouldn’t have been in the funk I’ve been in since a flight left JFK for Rome yesterday morning. But I digress. I still had Abuela.

“Morning,” I melted inside.

“Regular order then?” she assumed.

“Si, por favor,” I nodded, “And uh…You know how you’ve been making my horchata with…”

“Espresso in your horchata,” Abuela knew me all too well, “Of course, Frankie. I can tell when you had a rough night. I’m not going to ever say no to you and you should know better than to even think I would.”

“Sorry, Abuela,” I giggled a bit. Yep. This woman would always be the cure for whatever ailed me. In this case, it’s depression and a certain kind of homesickness I’ve never had before.

“It’s alright, mijo,” she let it go, “You seem off. And not like you went out with Tony and César last night and came home an hour after closing time. Is everything alright?”

“It’s been better,” I brushed her off, “But nothing you need to worry about.”

Because that was for me to worry about. I didn’t need to put that burden on Abuela’s shoulders. As good as a vent would probably do me, she didn’t need that. And I didn’t really feel like getting into it. Abuela had enough to take care of. And I needed a distraction more than anything. That’s half the reason why I liked coming here. I watch Abuela carefully craft my newborn baby burrito with love while I get to throw down horchata. Occasionally, I get some words of wisdom from her. It’s a good time. Besides, this food truck had more than just Abuela memories attached to it. It had…

BAM!

I felt a tiny pair of arms wrap around my waist and a face in the middle of my back, “We really need to stop running into each other like this, Frankie.”

Gracias a dios, she made it home ok. And I’m assuming with both kidneys. There’s the other memories Abuela’s food truck has…It’s where it all began again. If I never would’ve met the little spazz at my hip, who knows if I would’ve gotten my second shot with her sister? But I don’t know…I think I like her sister. Just a little bit. And…Well…She’s not too bad either. I spun Veronica around and got a decent look at her. And she looked like hell, but in the best way.

“Let’s see,” I teased her a bit, “Last night’s clothes, hair a mess, a hoody that does not belong to you, smudged mascara under your eyes…What? No broken heel, Veronica?”

“No,” Veronica rolled her eyes, “You’re mixing me up with my sister again, Frankie. That’s a Vanessa thing. I don’t wear heels. More of a platform leather boots type myself, but that’s just me.”

“Still,” I threw an arm around her, “Walks of shame look cute on you, Veronica.”

“Last night was fun,” Veronica leaned on me, stilling a drink from my horchata, “I fucking owe you.”

“For what?” I giggled, “I didn’t do anything.”

“My ass, you didn’t!” she squealed, “Dude, it’s not every day someone like Tessa walks into a bar that I just happen to be at for the night. That kind of serendipity doesn’t happen for someone like me.”

“I’d be careful about whose love story you’re poking at there, Veronica,” I argued, “Because…Uh…Didn’t we meet because of a relationship that started that very same way?”

“We met right here,” Veronica reminded me, “Because someone was too chicken shit to call Vanessa on his own and needed a wingman.”

“Call last night me paying you back,” I threw a ten on the window, “Abuela?”

“Si, Frankie?” she popped out, “Necesitas algo?”

“She does,” I ordered for her, “Before she slurps down all of my horchata.”

“I’m a thirsty bitch,” Veronica shrugged, “Sue me.”

“Gladly.”

“I got dibs on Vanessa.”

“Dammit…” I grumbled to myself, “Alright. I respectfully withdraw and I’ll just be over here doing other things. Don’t worry about me.”

“You’re just mad she’d represent me first,” Veronica laughed.

“And Abuela,” I added, “If you wanted to add extra spit to her taquitos, I wouldn’t say no.”

“Francisco!” Abuela snapped, “No! Sabes que nunca lo haría!”

“It’s a joke,” I backed off, “Just a little joke. A little ha, ha. Sorry…I know you wouldn’t.”

“Es verdad…” Abuela wrapped my burrito up and got started on Veronica’s taquitos, “Honestly, Frankie…I’m disappointed.”

“It’s alright, Abuela,” Veronica let it go, “I knew he meant it with love.”

“So,” I wondered, “What happened after you and Tessa left the Narrows?”

“We went out,” Veronica’s face lit up, “There’s a club about five blocks down from her apartment building. Her band played!”

“I didn’t know she was in a band.” But I could tell she at least played by the state of her fingers.

“I didn’t either until last night,” she swooned, “And she’s damn good at it! I’ve never seen someone jam like that. She’s much better than any of the local bands around here. Hell, at one point, I didn’t think she even needed the rest of the band. She was amazing on her own. But it’s more than just that. You should’ve seen it, Frankie. She’s…She’s too cool for me. I know I’m a pretty cool bitch, but she’s even cooler than I am.”

“Shut up,” I settled her, “There’s no way.”

“It’s true!” Veronica went on, “When we went back to her apartment, she showed me this big, beautiful bong that she blew herself! And it was so fucking pretty. It was probably a couple feet long, but it was black and hot pink and a neon green and this really pretty smoky electric blue and I have never wanted something more in my life. Dear god, it’s gorgeous. We burned one and went to sleep. No sex, no nothing. Just…Neither one of us wanted to sleep alone and Tessa wasn’t going to make me go back home. So, we didn’t. So, I laid there with her and…Frankie, I almost cried. It felt so fucking nice for a change.”

“Well, I’m happy for you, kiddo,” I kissed the top of her head, “And I’m glad I could help. But like I said. You helped me get Vanessa. Why shouldn’t you get Tessa, too?”

“I appreciate it,” Veronica threw her arms around me, “Seriously, Frankie…I’ve never had a serious girlfriend before. I’ve had casuals, but never anything serious.”

“Are you already thinking serious?” I gasped.

“Kind of…” a quick flash of red brushed across her cheeks, “But I don’t need your judgment, Mr. I’ve known Vanessa for six months and I damn near proposed to her the other night.”

“I never said there was any sort of judgment,” I assured her, grabbing her order from the window, “Gracias, Abuela.”

“De nada, cariño,” Abuela smiled, “Please. Go on. This is the most excitement I’ve gotten all morning. I’m invested.”

“I need to be getting home,” Veronica winced, “Before I end up playing into Victoria’s kidnapping fantasies, too.”

“Alright,” I hugged her tight, “And again, my offer still stands.”

“I know,” she nuzzled into me, “If Victoria becomes too much for me to handle and I can’t suppress the urge to choke her anymore, I know where you live. I know where you sleep. I know where you work when you’re working legit. And I’m more than welcome any time I want.”

“That’s my girl,” I kissed her forehead, “I love you, Veronica.”

“I love you, too, Frankie.” Don’t get me wrong. I love Vanessa dearly. But damn, having Veronica here is going to be a major help to my psyche while she’s gone. Mostly because I don’t think Veronica’s going to let me be depressed and beat myself up for letting Vanessa go to Italy. That wasn’t my decision to make. Hell, it was barely hers. Because there’s no way this doesn’t reek of Victoria’s meddling.

Instead of getting pissed like I probably should, I reveled in the fact that she was getting a whole different life experience. And if anyone could relate to what that experience was, it’d be me. My first time in Spain in my cognitive memory was the weirdest culture shock. I had grown up in New York. I knew nothing about life there except from what Mama and my brothers told me. But I had nothing firsthand. Until I was processing everything at four years old. Getting on the plane, making a layover in London, wondering why the hell everyone talked so weird. It’s not that I didn’t know the language. Mama made damn sure of that. To the point where I remember her bitching at Tony or César for speaking to me in English.

But Vanessa wasn’t dealing with Spain. Vanessa was in Italy. I didn’t even know if she was there yet. She had to be. Unless she had that same layover last a little longer than what she’d like. Than what I’d like. But they happen. It’s not like we had control over that. Still, I went home to an empty apartment and thumbed through the TV, hoping there’d be something on. Something to hold my attention long enough while I ate. I mean, Willow was on, but I’d rather not watch Willow for the millionth time just because it was on.

Ring, ring.

Huh…It’s not often the phone rings. I got up from the couch and grabbed it, just to shut it up, “Bueno…”

“Buona sera, amore mio…” a soft, husky voice greeted me on the other end. And I’m not too proud to admit I damn near broke down, “Quanto mi manchi così…”

“Vanessa…?” I could hardly get her name out of my mouth.

“Hi, baby…” her voice broke a bit. It’s good to know I’m not alone here, but that was one of the worst sounds in the world. I couldn’t tell if those were tears of joy or tears of pain. I’m going to go out on a limb, cross my fingers, and say it’s joy.

“Fuck, it does my heart good to hear your voice again,” I gushed, “Are you alright? You doing ok?”

“Ok as I can be, I suppose,” Vanessa reported, “I mean…It’d be nice if I was there with you, but…”

“I know, I know,” I settled her, “Can’t get what we want. But look on the bright side. We got this.”

“Yeah, we do…” I swear to God, I heard a smile in that girl’s voice. And in that moment, I knew everything was going to be ok.

[2idiots]

Keep Yourself Alive

pt. 27 // pt. 28⚛ // pt. 29

NCT Frat Social Media AU // College Athlete & Fratboy Lucas x reader

Word count: 1872ish

Warning: a little angsty, mentions of chronic pain, insecurities, kinda cringey, also text pictures meshed in with writing just a heads up

It’s not that you weren’t interested in all the hell week practices that coach planned for the swim team, in fact you were fascinated by the sets your old coach was giving out.  In fact you didn’t want to be in this dark room away from everyone else out in the living room drinking, playing games, and eating all the food Johnny has painstakingly prepared. You wanted to be out there getting drunk on two cups of eggnog like Hyunjin, the friend you just barely met before leaving the swim team. But for the first time since deciding to fly across the world for college with your best friend you had to dip out of your Christmas tradition. Sure it wasn't intentional but that didn't stop the tearing feeling in the pit of your chest from blooming. You may have felt horrible physically but the mental strain of not being able to be out there performing your best attempt at normal for something that was so important was that much worse. 

Were those tears wetting your cheeks? No. Those were allergies, you couldn’t be crying. Who knew pollen was so bad in the winter?

The seconds had turned into minutes and 15 minutes later you were still laying on Johnny’s bed in the dark, feeling like someone sucker punched your heart, and other parts, curled into his sheets with only the harsh light emitting from your phone screen. You had taken one of the pain meds the doctor gave you but it had yet to kick in. You should've taken it sooner, if anyone knew your body it was you and you knew you should've take it earlier, then you could stand out there and attempt normal alongside your friends. But somewhere deep down you were hoping that maybe, just maybe, you wouldn’t need some painkiller to go about mingling. Yu were wrong and now you were reaping the consequences of that decision. 

But above all else, you were worried that Lucas would show up at the party while you were holed away in the fetal position in your best friend’s bed. Stupid, right? Here you were, organs cementing themselves together, and yet all you could think about was some boy you had only known for a few months. But if he showed up you knew somehow you were going to have to explain yourself, something you had been dreading since night one.

Lucas had already texted you to tell you he was running a little bit late so you had a bit of time to figure something out or get out but that was nearly 30 minutes ago; he could only be so far behind. Any minute he was bound to be walking through Johnny and Mark's front door with one of his dopey grins, scanning the room for the person who invited him and coming up empty handed.

Wow you were the worst host of all time. At least Chan and Hyunjin had each other but Lucas was on his own. Here without a host. Sure he could visit with Jaehyun or Ten but they had obviously come without him for some reason considering they all lived together.

God hold it together! If you could take exams with your survival brain activated then you could handle one boy. Too much anxiety and your brain was jumping from conclusion to conclusion, problem to problem. Organs cementing together: check. Composure melting: check.

Three sharp knocks jolted you out of your downward spiral, followed by a soft voice, “Y/n can I come in?” The soft voice that had been at the root of your anxiety. 

Wow, who knew blood pressure could skyrocket that high? 

“Y/n?” The question was followed by a quick ping from your phone. Quietly, wiping the few stray tears off your cheek, you looked back to the harsh screen. 

It only took a few moments for the door to slowly creak open, the glow from all the Christmas lights in the living room casting a soft light across Johnny's bed. In that time you managed to suck in a few deep breaths and zip up your pants, wearing jeans with this bloat was not a good idea.

He was quiet, sinking into the other half of the bed while you laying on the other side facing away. Too quiet. The silence was making you nervous.

Then there was another ping at your phone. Sending a vibration through your hand: what was he doing?

You let out a bleat of laughter, what was he doing?

There was another moment of uncomfortable silence, you smiling into your phone screen as he tried to find more ways to make you laugh again, before he finally asked, out loud this time: "Is it your thingy?" His voice wasn't too far from yours and you could tell he was still sitting from the dip in the mattress.

"My thingy?"

"You know that thing you had surgery for? Does it hurt?"

You flipped over to look at him, even though you could barely see him with the dim lighting, the only glow coming from the cracks under the door and between the curtains. "You mean my appendix? Did you already forget everything I taught you?" You laughed with a soft smile that you hoped he could hear in your tone. 

In the darkness, his eyes search the room for yours landing only on your blurry dark outline. "Yeah your aerobics."

"Appendix." You corrected, another smile cracking through your self-wallowing.

There were two ways this could go over. You could lie, say it is the appendix that in all honesty hadn't hurt much since you got it out, the doctor said something about a high pain tolerance, or you could tell the truth and face the thing you have been dreading most since spending more time with him. He deserved the truth.

"Um not quite," your tone was hesitant and slow, though it wasn't him bolting you were afraid of it, it was you. "I uh, I am in pain right now. Actually, um, I’m in pain a lot of the time." You felt a hot tear slip down your cheek, dammit not again. "And it's uh, it's why I ran away from you on Halloween and, um, it's why I have to cancel a lot of our plans."

He was quiet across from you but you could feel his hand searching across the blankets for something, maybe yours?

"I'm so sorry. You came for a Christmas party and I'm crying to you in my best friend's bed." Wow what a catch. "If you wanna leave it's ok, I understand."

"Nah, I think I'll just chill in here with you," he laid down next to you, finally finding your hand and fitting it into his. "And anyway Mark is out there yelling about a journalist turned babysitter turned tutor turned princess teaching a prince about quote true christmas spirit, so I'd rather be in here." 

"That's an iconic Christmas movie, watch your words Yukhei." You chastised playfully, wiping away your tears with the back of your hand. The warmth from his hand was eating away at some of the anxiety, though you were still trembling.

"Ah yeah, did I say boring, I meant super interesting and exciting," he grinned, replacing your hand with his own to wipe your tears. What the hell? "Watching anything with you is exciting." When did he get this smooth?

"Yeah whatever. I know for a fact you fell asleep in Mathilda too." As cheesy as he was, this tall star basketball player was making your heart race so fast it felt like it was about to escape from your chest.

"Hey I came from practice, it's not my fault coach took all our energy!" 

You swatted playfully at him as the conversation lulled, because despite the laughter and his hand, all those negative thoughts were still swirling around in the back of your head eager to rear their face. Muttering, almost too soft for him to hear you choked out, "I'm sorry I can't be what you want."

"What? Who told you that?" He rolled over to face you, even though he couldn't see you all that clearly. "I've been trying to tell you for weeks now that I like you. If only you didn't change the subject right away. Y/n I like you. I like you a lot. Honestly I liked you that first night at Halloween when you were rambling about the night sky and all your dreams. I didn't expect to actually talk to someone at that party but then there you were on the couch, critiquing Doyoung’s music but also dancing to it and enjoying yourself?"

A blush spread through your cheeks and down your neck, leaving fire in its path. "Oh God, I was really high on halloween and a little drunk. I hope I wasn't too harsh on the critiques, though I should’ve known it was Doyoung. The music was pretty run of the mill. I mean Ariana Grande remixes? Seriously, what kind of party is that?" They're was a long pause that you felt the need to cover up with a quick justification "that wasn't a rhetorical--" 

"--can I kiss you?"

He was facing you, you could tell by his soft breath and how he seemed to fold into you. "Why?" Good god if your friends could hear you right now evading again, they would smack you.

"Because I like you!" When you tried to protest, he just tutted and repeated, "I like you, even if you are in pain."

Oh that's why you were so nervous, hearing that. Also you could feel the soft outline of his lips lightly brushing yours, combine that with the fact that the tether to your pain seemed to be loosening up as the painkillers kicked in. You would never feel perfect but this did give you enough of a confidence boost to close the gap, kissing him like your very life depended on it. This boy, those lips, these feelings; they would be the death of you. 

Pulling away to catch your breath, unable to form the words you wanted too, you knew you weren't done explaining yourself. There was more to your pain, more to apologize for how you let your fear dictate your time with him. "I need to tell you first, when I say I'm in pain I don't mean like some achy broad pain. I ran away on Halloween because a lot of the time sex hurts and my high was fading and I knew I couldn't stay. It was already a bad decision but I just wanted to feel like a regular kid and you were so nice, a little dopey with that fake blonde wig but still really hot. What I'm trying to say is: it's not just my head or my stomach,  it's those parts too. The parts that we started with. And those are important to people. And I like you, I like you so much but I'm not some normal girl. There are going to be days when I can't leave the bed or can't go out with you or be, um, intimate with you and there might be a lot of those days. I have some baggage that's a little more physical so if you wanna bolt I get it. You probably want someone who can do everything you want, so this is me showing you the door." You made a broad gesture to sweep to the door. These were your fears laying out for him to see if he looked close enough. Maybe you weren't enough for him or anyone for that matter. 

"Nah, I think I'll stay here. Maybe I can ask Johnny if he's got Mathilda around here so I can finally watch it all."

Keep Yourself Alive

pt. 27 // pt. 28⚛ // pt. 29

NCT Frat Social Media AU // College Athlete & Fratboy Lucas x reader

summary: College is hard enough, right? Coursework, two jobs, a social life, and the state of your mental health. As if that was enough now the school’s no.1 athlete won’t leave you alone after a one night stand. And maybe you like him back but you have a tendency to run when life gets too difficult especially now that undiagnosed chronic pain just seems to be getting worse with each passing month.

(I am not to happy with this chapter so I might come back and edit and revise. It just feels too gloom and doom for me. Let me know what you think. That’s for waiting for the update! And thanks for reading. There is only like one or two more actual chapters and then an epilogue.)

Taglist: @princeofshenzhenuwus @hannahdinse8 @wongassride ​ @cowward @sakura-uji

[justsomebucky]

The Three Date Minimum - 3

Summary: Reader is the last single person at her office, and while she puts on a good front, she’s lonely. Will dating apps find true love, or will she swear off romance for good?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!reader

Word Count: 2,111

Warnings: language, drinking, sexual innuendo, lots of bad language, no elderly ladies were harmed, uh...fluff…this is fluff.

A/N: Sorry it’s been…three months?! I lost motivation. This is barely edited. But @imhereforbvcky wrote this amazing Wade story and while my Wade is nowhere near as perfect, it made me want to finalize this chapter. Thanks for the Wade help, Mee!

No matter how many times you told yourself that everything was going to be okay, you were still so freakin’ nervous.

Speed-dating was one thing…you didn’t have to put up with anyone for very long and you definitely had the chance to bail.

Your date with Wade was a real date, one that required extended alone time with one human, awkward or not. Not only that, but he wanted to go out on a Sunday…

Why a Sunday? He hadn’t bothered to tell you that.

In fact, Wade hadn’t even told you where you were going yet. His last text had said, ‘Dress casually. Can’t wait.’ followed by thirteen winky faces.

THIRTEEN!

What the hell could a grown-ass man accomplish by sending thirteen winky faces?

Anyway, you spent your morning with the nervous sweats while changing into five different ‘casual’ outfits, trying to decide which would be practical and comfortable but also make you feel less like a potato.

It didn’t help to have Natasha watching your every move, commenting on everything from your hair to your demeanor (you were not being negative, you were just feeling a little anxious!)

“Promise me that when he finally gets here you’re going to act a little more enthusiastic,” Natasha commented dryly from her seat on your bed. “If it’s already a bad date in your head, then it’s definitely not going to go well.”

“Can’t someone have more than one emotion, Nat? I am enthusiastically getting ready, after all.” You leaned closer to the mirror, inspecting the way the fabric of your shirt fell. “Do you think this –“

“It’s fine!” She stood up and pulled you away from the mirror, turning you around to face her before cupping your cheeks. “Y/N. You have to stay calm. You have to stay open-minded, okay? Wade has a lot of energy, he’s very excitable…just go with it for one night, okay?”

She was right, of course.

“I get it, Nat.”

“You can do this.” Her hands dropped from your face. “I believe in you.”

You gave a sharp nod, more for yourself than for her. “I can do this.”

Before Natasha could utter another word, the buzzer sounded.

It was five o’clock, and Wade had arrived.

----

To say that Wade Wilson was handsome would be insulting. He was gorgeous, with bright eyes and a great smile. He was also funny, sweet, charming as hell, and as Natasha had said, really energetic.

So energetic, in fact, that you were tired before you even got to the cab out front. As a self-made introvert, you just weren’t on his level anymore.

He opened the door for you, sweeping his arm in a grand gesture towards the back seat. “Ladies first.”

“Thanks,” you said, getting into the cab and scooting over to make room for Wade.

“Hello!”

You looked up at the rearview mirror, meeting the eyes of the driver. “Hello.”

“Dopinder, what did I say?” Wade chided, shaking his head. He looked over to you apologetically. “Don’t mind him, he’s just my regular driver so I asked for a favor tonight.”

“Mr. Wade, where are we going?” Dopinder asked, glancing at you again in his mirror. “Where does the young lady want to go?”

“I have plans to really wow this one.” Wade gave you a nod and a wink. “It’s 2865 West 3rd Street, here in Brooklyn.”

Dopinder looked confused for a second after typing the address into his GPS. “But Mr. Wade, that’s a –“

“Just drive!”

You shifted uncomfortably. What the hell was going on?

Where was Wade taking you?

“You know, Y/N, I feel like I ordered you off of Amazon or something,” he commented.

Your eyes met his again, and you tried to bite back a laugh. “Why is that?”

Wade’s thoughts went a mile a minute. “Well, it’s like something on my Wish List was finally back in stock, you know? And I got that little email alert, and my eyes lit up like a kid on his birthday, so I rushed over in a crappy cab to open your box. Well, not that box, maybe later though I don’t want to press my luck. Of course, maybe that’s a bad analogy since you seem really nice and Amazon is a corporate nightmare. Also Jeff Bezos is a real dickhead, he could end world hunger six times over but he doesn’t, so he deserves to have his nuts put in a blen-“

“We’re here!” Dopinder announced.

“Thank god,” you muttered, opening up your door and exiting the cab as quickly as possible. When you turned to look at the building you’d been dropped off in front of, your eyes narrowed in question.

“Shoreview Retirement Home,” you read out loud, turning to Wade in confusion as he finished paying Dopinder. “Wade, why…why are we at a retirement home?”

His eyes gleamed in the street light. “Oh, it’s not just any retirement home, Y/N. This is the home my Nana was at before her untimely passing.”

All you could do was follow him up the cement stairs and into the lobby. “But that only leads me to more questions, like, why are we at a retirement home for a date where your Nana used to be?”

The question fell on deaf ears, though, as Wade signed in at the front desk and was almost immediately surrounded by about eight different elderly women in wheelchairs, all reaching for him with big grins on their faces.

So he was popular with the elderly…big deal. It was kind of sweet, right? He clearly had a bond with these ladies, probably from all the time spent when his Nana was still around. It was really sweet that he still volunteered here.

“I don’t even volunteer here,” Wade called from the center of the granny cyclone. “I just show up to kick some old-timer ass at shuffleboard and eat all their applesauce. Greatest generation my ass!”

“It’s pudding night, hot stuff!”

“Watch your hands there, Gladys!”

His hands formed a little heart shape in your direction. “Let’s get this party started, shall we?”

You pinched the bridge of your nose.

----

“Okay, Y/N…the secret to being really really good at shuffleboard is to be the disc. Feel its path. Become one with the disc.” Wade reached around you and gripped your cue, making you feel incredibly uncomfortable for, oh, about the hundredth time since you arrived. “Here, let me show you in a not-at-all suggestive way.”

“I think I got it, Wade.”

“Okay, but just watch out, because that Dorothy over there, she’s a real competitor. She’s won the last five championships here, and I’ve seen her make some cutthroat moves to get that trophy.” He cupped his hands around his mouth. “Isn’t that right, Dot, you fucking cheater?”

You tried not to roll your eyes. “I’ll keep an eye out for Dorothy.”

Taking a turn was nerve-wracking, because not only was Wade up your ass with every move, but the old ladies really did take the game seriously. Once you pushed the disc down the court, you sighed in relief. You’d never wished for an open bar at a retirement home before, but there was a first time for everything.

After a mediocre round where the disc didn’t even get close to the mark, you turned back to Wade, who was now seated between two elderly women you hadn’t met yet.  

“It’s okay, Y/N,” he said, nodding toward the court. “It’s totally okay that you didn’t become the disc, and now Dorothy and Agnes are gonna take me for all their worth. It’s totally fine.”

So, you guessed it bothered him.

“Sylvia!” Wade shouted, jumping about a foot away from the little woman seated beside him. “Wait to pinch my ass until after I win!”

“Stop putting it in front of me, hot stuff,” Sylvia replied, waggling her eyebrows at him.

Wade stood up and walked over to you, rubbing his backside dramatically. “That Sylvia, man, she’s a goddamn cougar. Or a cougar’s horny Grandma. Everyone else here knows the ass-pinching-during-shuffleboard etiquette.”

“Wade, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you liked the attention you got from these women.” You gestured around you. “And they like it too.”

“I like to keep their spirits up, Y/N.” His face grew serious, hands moving to his hips. “It’s not about me at all. I simply want to help some old women facing the end of their meaningless, stinky, diaper-ridden lives to have a little fun before they’re sent to the dirt. The men here could join too, but they just get so jealous. A shuttle with a working rocket booster can really cause some envy around here.”

“Fair enough,” you offered, handing him the cue for his turn and ignoring his last remark. “But I’m not a seasoned shuffleboard professional. If you can salvage this turn we still have a good chance at winning.”

He gave you a wink. “You’re damn right we do. Watch and learn, Y/N.”

You stood off to the side as Wade stepped up to the court, cue in hand as he stared his opponents down.

Maybe he wasn’t so bad. He liked helping others and he really did seem like the kind of guy who wanted to make the world a better place, even if it was in his own weird way. Plus, at least it wasn’t your run-of-the-mill dinner and a movie, right? It was something to talk about.

“Goddammit, Dorothy! I’m gonna yeet your fucking dentures into next Tuesday if you don’t stop cheating!”

You shrunk back against the brick wall behind you.

Then again, maybe he really did just like competing against senior citizens.

----

Once Wade was declared shuffleboard king (after challenging one of Agnes’ moves), he tried to get you to stay for celebratory rice pudding, but you insisted that you had to get home (at 7:30 PM on a Sunday).

Was it a good date?

Would you…could you go out with him again?

It would take a lot of processing and probably a lot of alcohol to figure that one out, but it was still your second-best date so far.

At least this whole ordeal would be over soon and you could go back to watching Netflix.

You narrowly avoided having Dopinder pick you up by explaining that you liked to walk, and after a goodnight hug that lasted a little too long (with an almost-ass-grab that you also narrowly avoided), you and Wade parted ways.

As you passed the 107th on your way home, a strange urge to go inside and vent to the snarky bartender filled your veins. It would just be nice to talk to someone who was calm and witty instead of crazy and…well, crazy. Plus, it was too early to message Nat or Wanda without them hounding you for details.

Just one drink, you promised yourself as you stepped up to the door and reached for the handle.

On the door, a bright yellow notice informed you that the place was closed for a private party.

“Dammit,” you mumbled, lowering your hand. With a sigh, you turned back around to head home to whatever takeout and wine might be left in your fridge.

“Hey!”

Wait…

“Snarky bartender?” you asked, turning around to see Bucky opening the door. “Sorry, I wasn’t trying to creep on the bar, I saw that notice and was leaving.”

A bemused smile lifted his lips. “Snarky bartender? Is that what you’ve been calling me in your head?”

“And out loud now, ‘cause I forgot your name,” you lied smoothly.  

“Sure you did. Just like I forgot yours, Y/N.” He kept the door propped open with his foot as he stepped further outside. “Did you want to come in?”

“I thought there was a private event?”

“There is.”

“It’s not a speed-dating event is it?”

“No, it’s an engagement party.”

Your brows stitched together. “Which means it’s invite only.”

“And I’m inviting you.”

“Won’t the host get mad?”

“No, I’m the host.”

“You’re the what now?”

Bucky chuckled at your confused expression. “I mean, I own the place. This is my bar. So my invite stands, if you want.”

You eyed him warily. Why hadn’t he told you it was his bar and he was a snarky owner? “I shouldn’t. I have work in the morning.”

His head tilted a little as he pushed the door a little wider. “Come on, just stay for a few drinks, on the house. And I mean it this time.”

“Well when you put it that way.” You brushed past him and right into the party, his soft laugh echoing behind you.

----

Part 4

Masterlist

No tags

[juju-on-that-yeet]

Pinnacle

Prompt: Whumptober Day 8, Stab Wound

Summary: Google Chrome and Yandereplier are at a seedy club when a fight breaks out. It's not long before one of them gets hurt.

Warnings: Blood, violence (I mean, the prompt is “Stab Wound,” so :p )

Tagging: @peribloke (ask to be tagged!)

Read on AO3 (Full Whumptober Series)

Enjoy!

~

Contrary to what the name suggests, “Pinnacle” is one of the seediest, shadiest clubs in the city. It’s got a name flashy enough to attract careless tourists, and a reputation that attracts the patronage of the least respectable people in the city.

Which is half the reason Yandereplier likes it there so much. The other half is that they never check IDs.

“This place is gonna get shut down before the year is out,” Chrome mutters from his seat at his and Yandere’s two-person table. Yandere smirks, fruity cocktail in one hand.

“According to the regulars, Pinnacle’s been around forever,” he says, taking a sip of his drink. “It was here before you were made, and Yami’s even been here before for business.”

“Business?” Chrome raises an eyebrow. Yandere laughs and leans in closer to Chrome.

“I’d bet about half the guys in here belong to some gang or another,” Yandere says, hushed but still grinning, “Employees included.”

“Great,” Chrome growls, slumping into his seat in annoyance. Yandere laughs again and ruffles Chrome’s hair with his free hand.

“The safe clubs are boring,” Yandere tells him, “Places like these are where the fun is.”

Chrome does have to admit that the club is at least clean, and the music isn’t too bad, either. It’s a bit of a cramped space, though. There’s people pressed all around him and Yandere at other tables, and the dance floor is packed. It’s the reason Yandere is sitting here drinking instead of dancing; there’s no space available yet. But it isn’t that late, and Yandere can party later than most humans care to. He’s prepared to wait, so long as he has something to drink. Chrome wishes he could get drunk; maybe he’d have more fun.

His attention is eventually grabbed by something happening near the center of the dance floor. Several people have stopped dancing, and seem to be conversing – no, yelling. It’s hard to tell through the volume of the club.

“What’s up, Aka-kun?” Yandere asks him, noticing his staring beyond Yandere.

“There’s some guys arguing on the dance floor,” Chrome answers. Yandere turns around in his seat to look, just as the argument becomes loud enough to attract attention from the other patrons without enhanced hearing.

“Huh,” Yandere says. He thinks. “I wonder if they’re gonna fight.”

“That seems like a strong possibility,” Chrome sighs.

Sure enough, the men arguing start shoving each other, and before Chrome can comment on it, he spies a flash of something silver. The patrons nearest to the fight start shouting, too, and start trying to leave. But the crowd is still impressively thick, and the escape is slow. The men fighting must be in a gang, because other people around the dance floor and at tables start pulling out their own weapons. Mostly knives, but Chrome spies a few pairs of brass knuckles and even a revolver. The other people around begin to shout and panic, too, and before long, the club is swarming with gangsters brawling and people clamoring to get out.

Yandere observes the scene with a slowly spreading grin. He looks over at Chrome with red eyes.

“I told you, Aka-kun,” he says, “This is where the fun is.” He pulls something out of his shirt; not his katana, but a shorter, fatter knife, better for close quarters.

“Yandere,” Chrome warns, “I swear if you even thi–”

It’s too late. Yandere’s already jumped into the fray, knife in hand.

Chrome growls under his breath as he gets up to follow. He’ll admit to being a little worried about Yandere’s safety, but mostly he’s just annoyed at having to stick around in this club. The heaving mass of panicking people is hard even for Chrome to wade through; he imagines it’s only Yandere’s small size and agility that’s enabled him to move deeper into the club with such ease. Chrome’s not really in the mood to get stabbed tonight, so he treads as carefully as possible, avoiding those with weapons.

Before long, though, he bumps into someone with both a pair of brass knuckles and fighting glare on.

“Watch it, asshole!” he yells, rearing back to punch. Chrome catches his fist before it comes close to his face.

“Have you been punching everyone who runs into you? In this packed, tight space?” Chrome deadpans. He tightens his fist, and the man howls as his hand is crushed in Chrome’s. “Have some sense and fuck off.”

The man bolts – or tries to, the crowd is still thicker than syrup. Chrome lets him leave and continues into the fray, but snippets of conversation reach his ears.

“Did you see that? That guy broke Tito’s hand!”

“Let’s show ‘im what happens when people mess with our boys!”

“Fuck me,” Chrome mutters under his breath.

Moments later he’s swarmed by gangsters (it must be easy to get through the crowd when one’s waving weapons around). It’s hard to fight in such close quarters, but Chrome is designed to be good at it. Unlike the first gangster, though, the others don’t flee when Chrome breaks their noses or snaps their knives in two. The energy of the crowd makes them feral, and the support of their metaphorical brothers in arms makes them reckless and relentless. Eventually, though, all have retreated but two, and their attack pattern is nearly unpredictable. Chrome has to wonder if the pair are brother and sister in normal life as well as gang life; it would explain their synchronization. One plays offense and one plays defense, but they switch every second, and they’re both good at avoiding a punch. Chrome knows he’s not as strong as he could be right now, either; the club is hot, so sweltering from the packed bodies that Chrome’s hardware is on the verge of overheating.

Chrome is busy blocking a slash from the man when the woman sneaks underneath and stabs him in the chest. Chrome chokes, body stuttering, as his pain sensors register the damage. What genius decided to make robots that could feel pain? he thinks as he grabs the woman who stabbed him by her ponytail and twists her head backwards. He dispatches the brother next, fully sick of this fight and tired of letting his assailants escape alive. He looks down at himself, at the gash near the center of his chest, and watches black oil flow out. All at once, vertigo hits, and Chrome staggers, slamming a hand down on a nearby table to ground himself, other hand instinctively moving to cover his wound. He isn’t squeamish, why is he reacting so strongly? Warning alerts pop up in his mind:

DANGER: Core breached, functionality at 91%. Repair immediately!

Fuck.

Now that Chrome knows that, he can sort of feel the notch in his core from the woman’s knife. Of all the things that knife could’ve hit, his core is the worst. Where humans have their hearts, Chrome and his android brothers have their cores: Spherical blocks of metal and hardware about twice the size of a human heart in the direct center of their chest. They store battery power and disperse it accordingly, circulate antifreeze, and keep the unit functioning. A Google unit can lose limbs, have senses destroyed, or sustain traumatic brain injury, and still survive if they keep calm and get repaired within a few hours. But cores are delicate things, and even the slightest damage can be catastrophic. If an arm is severed, the oil can be diverted away to elsewhere in the body to keep from bleeding out. But a core cannot delegate its own functions, so any injury quickly gets worse and worse as the core keeps working. And for a core, expected functionality is no lower than 98%, ideally more, at any time. Anything even slightly lower is cause for concern. 91% is far beyond concerning, and Chrome knows it’ll only get lower from here.

But dammit, Yandere’s still somewhere in the club, and like hell Chrome’s going to leave without him. He’ll probably need his help soon, too, with his core functionality dropping by the second.

The crowd has thinned to a degree since Chrome’s fight started, and the only people still in the club are in pairs or groups, beating the tar out of each other. A few people are sprawled out on the floor, unconscious…probably. Chrome doesn’t care enough to check. None of them are Yandere, so it doesn’t matter. Chrome’s body doesn’t want to move; energy is being diverted to his core, so much so that his fingers and toes start to feel numb and useless. But he pushes himself forward regardless, struggling along to find Yandere. Eventually, a gunshot rings out from the back of the club, and people scatter once more, abandoning their fights to escape. Chrome distantly remembers seeing a gun in someone’s hand earlier in the night, he’s surprised it took them so long to use it. Among the throng of people running from the back to escape the building is, finally, Yandere.

“Hey,” he says, practically skipping up to Chrome. His clothes are splattered in blood that isn’t his, and his eyes are bright red, pupils blown wide. “Some idiot tried to shoot me, can you imagine?” He laughs, but quickly notices Chrome’s listliss posture and how he’s holding his chest. “Aka-kun, are you okay?”

“Got stabbed,” Chrome wheezes. Talking is harder than he thought it’d be. “Nicked my core.”

Yandere’s expression instantly changes to shock. He knows how cores work, Chrome told him about it ages ago.

“What’s the functionality?” Yandere asks, eyes already darkening back to brown.

“Seven…” He sways, only barely catching himself. “Seventy-six percent.”

Yandere says something in Japanese, probably a swear, but Chrome can’t concentrate enough to translate. Yandere goes to his side, pulling the arm Chrome hasn’t pressed to his wound across his shoulders.

“I’ll get us home, don’t worry,” Yandere tells him, “Let’s go out through the back. It’s closer and safer.”

Chrome nods, and the simple motion makes spots appear in his eyes. He’s really in no position to protest Yandere’s decision even if he wanted to. He keeps walking alongside Yandere, trying not to lean on him too much, but he feels duller and heavier with every passing moment. At one point, his vision blinks out for a few seconds and he nearly collapses into Yandere’s side. Yandere yelps and only barely manages to keep him standing.

“Hey, don’t pass out, Aka-kun!” Yandere cries, “You have to walk with me, I can’t carry you!”

Chrome knows. He’s too heavy even for Yandere’s above-average strength. But the thought flits out of his head a moment later as more and more of his energy goes to support his fluttering core. His feet and hands are numb now, hard to walk on, hard to grab with. By the time Yandere gets Chrome to the employees-only back door, the numbness has reached Chrome’s elbows and knees. Yandere pushes the door open with the shoulder Chrome’s not leaning on and pulls him into the night air and out of Pinnacle. Chrome can hear the crowd on the other side of the building, hear sirens in the distance getting closer.

“Dammit, of course,” Yandere mutters, “Now we have to go through the alleys to avoid the cops.”

Chrome’s body is just about done moving, though, and he sags, slumping against Pinnacle’s back wall.

“Can’t go,” Chrome gasps. He coughs, and oil comes up.

“Okay, okay,” Yandere says, frantic, “I’m calling Yami, he’ll get out of here.”

Chrome can feel his core pulsing painfully. The notch has morphed into gaping cavern, leaking power.

“Core’s…” Chrome coughs again. “Thirty-eight…percent.”

A core doesn’t need to hit zero for an android to die. It can happen any time once the functionality hits 20%. Chrome’s chest feels like fire. It’s the only thing he can still feel.

“You’ll be okay, Aka-kun, you’ll–” He pulls his cell phone away from his ear, face drawn with anguish. “Chikusho! Answer me, Yami!!” He presses a button and puts his phone back to his ear. “It’s only twelve-thirty, you have to still be up!”

“Wilf…?” Chrome can’t finish the question. Too much effort.

“He shot his phone yesterday and hasn’t replaced it yet,” Yandere answers, shivering with nerves as he waits for Dark to pick up. Chrome suddenly realizes that Yandere is crying. “Oh god, fuck, fuck, he has to pick up, I can’t get you home in time–”

“Yan…” Chrome gasps. He tries to lift his hand to wipe Yandere’s tears, but his arm won’t move anymore. “Onii-san…s’okay.”

Yandere bites his lip and brushes Chrome’s hair out of his forehead. There’s oil on his hands. There’s oil all over.

“I’ll be okay when you are,” Yandere tells him, voice shaky. “So just stay awake for me, okay, otouto?”

Chrome nods weakly, leaning into Yandere’s hand as it moves from Chrome’s hair to his cheek.

“Yami?” Yandere suddenly gasps. “Oh my god, Yami, I need your help! Aka-kun and I are at Pinnacle, at the back door, and Aka-kun got stabbed! It hurt his core and he’s dying Yami, please–”

There’s a rushing of wind as something like a black hole opens up in front of Chrome and Yandere. In only a moment, the rushing dies down and the smoke clears, leaving Darkiplier standing there, phone still in hand.

“Yami,” Yandere gasps, relief heavy in his tone.

Chrome is glad that Yandere is relieved. He’s almost forgotten that he’s the reason Yandere’s upset in the first place. Everything feels distant now. His body is beyond being numb; it doesn’t feel like his. Even his chest, even his sputtering core feels dull and chilled. The gash continues leaking energy, festering in his chest. Objectively, he knows this, but he cannot feel it, he cannot speak, and he cannot keep his eyes open.

Dark, meanwhile, doesn’t say a word, only teleports the group back to Ego Inc. in a flash of dark smoke. The void, for all its cold and emptiness, feels no different to Chrome than the night air outside of Pinnacle. It only looks darker, and darker, and darker, and Chrome cannot stay awake long enough to see where Dark has taken him.

[fantazeerps]

Last Night in D&D

The One-Shot Squad rolls out! Octavia the Human Swashbuckler Rogue played by @polymorphme, Rattles the Kenku Drunken Monk played by @owlbearwithme, Five the Tabaxi Warlord played by @buniculus, Tola the Earth Genasi Champion Fighter played by @imaneea, and finally Stabitha Ankleshanker the Gnome Thief Rogue played by Me.

They were sent by the regular party to retrieve the corpse of their valued ally, Sizzle. So they track it to a big ol spire of stone... lined with mysterious yellow crystals identical to the ones that lined the massive form of the Tengeriin, including an absolutely massive one that rises floor to ceiling and beyond. Hmm....

Five sees a mysterious silhouette and hears a mysterious voice coming from the central pillar of crystal. No one else does.

A cursory exploration of the room reveals the crystals to be harmless, but curiously humming with energy. Breaking off portions (Rattles ate theirs) of the surrounding crystals, the party finds out that they have a very strange property: by pointing them towards another crystal formation--say, the colossal spire in the center--they can teleport along those crystal clusters. They use this to navigate to a higher floor! Where they discover...

A pair of huge elementals--one Earth, one Air--who warn the party against proceeding! Because some eeeeevil lurks on the pillar! Some sort of blue evil, even!

BUT! We’re here to do a job, and we’re nothing if not professional. Combat begins, with Octavia being flung head over heels out of the group by the whirlwind of the Air Elemental as everyone else sets up!

...With, unfortunately, Tola our big tank, in the back, poking at everyone with her huge glaive. We’re not smart. Five eventually realizes this and yanks her forward, but not before Rattles gets pounded so hard into the soil they start bouncing against the floor from every hammering fist the Earth Elemental unleashes. [squeaky toy noise]

Stabs gets her first natural 20 for the night with her Dagger of Venom and rolls double 10s on the weapon’s bonus poison damage, which bolstered by the crit is potentially enough to cleave the Air Elemental completely in half! ... if it weren’t immune to Poison. Dammit.

Tola, meanwhile, absolutely rips the Air Elemental apart. This girl is the reverse of Jerico in every way--she rolled zero critical failures and landed 95% of every attack she threw out the entire night. I love her. We all love her.

Octavia quite literally rips the Earth Elemental a new asshole, getting back to her feet and tearing the whole thing’s back end off with a single full attack + sneak attack damage. The thing trips over its own fists and lands face-down, Tola finishing it off.

During our exploration of the spire, the party STOLE FIZZY LIFTING DRINKS!!! via finding a mysteriously glowing pool and taking an exploratory sip once we see some animals floating around, finding out the stuff grants 1 minute of flight if drank or spread on the skin. We all take a bottle of the stuff.

Higher up in the spire, we meet a pair of Couatls who warn us against an Evil locked inside the central spire, claiming that they cannot allow us to go further for fear of us releasing it... until Five and Octavia convince the things to let us go anyway, since we’re not here to release any Evils, and in fact offer to kill the Evil if it does end up popping out. That ends up getting them on our side, and they say that they’ll tell the elemental guardians to stand down.

During the talk, we find out that this Evil was responsible for creating the Tengeriin!!! It MUST be immensely powerful!

Not powerful enough to make us listen, though. Sizzle’s body is on top of the spire, practically half-eaten by the birds that stole her in the first place. We stoop the poor, mangled corpse up, and a voice from inside the spire promises us riches and fame should we just obey it and let it out.

Absolutely no one takes it up on that offer, figuring that their gig with the Silver Ox is profitable anyway. It’s powerless to stop us from just walking out.

Quest over! We won!

... but, feeling guilty (or maybe that’s just me) about not taking Hugo up on the boss fight and figuring we’ve got time to kill anyway, we restart our old save and take the voice in the crystal up on the offer in an AU.

The voice in the crystal is a poweful Air Djinni! And he promises us fortune, food, and fffffucking fine clothes! All we have to do is become its slaves. All in all, the word “slaves” is pretty shitty, and we already kind of have a job, so the Djinn drops all pretenses and says “if you will not take the manacles, then I will make you” or something similar.

Too bad it’s five against one. All five of us are martial characters armed with magic weapons and 90,000 attacks each, two of which are further augmented by Sneak Attack. Between that, Tola’s Action Surge, and Rattle’s Flurry of Blows, all supported by Five’s Lead the Attack and Inspiring Shout, the Djinn barely manages to cause anyone major inconvenience before he’s brought to next to no HP and begs for mercy.

We give it to him. And, in return, all five of us get a Wish. Not just any Wish, though, but a Wish that grants us up to 25k gold worth of gear. Hugo, mercifully, decides that this is the Good Ending and deletes our previous save, and we all get to enjoy some overpowered gear for a change as the Djinn piles on our gifts and Plane Shifts away, possibly never to be seen again.

Sizzle’s body in one hand and a shitload of treasure in the other, the One-Shot Crew returns triumphantly to camp as the main plot moves ever further ahead...

[mindingmyownbusiness]

Duet

Pairing - Bucky Barnes x Reader Prompt - “I love it when you sing.” Summary - You’ve just figured out that the mysterious voice you hear singing through the vents is none other than the Winter Soldier himself. Now the only question is, what do you do with this newfound information? Warnings - n/a, just adorable fluff, it’s sorta my thang Word Count - 3026 Notes - Written for @true-queen-of-mischief and her 600 follower writing challenge, congratulations! I know this is hella late, it’s 100% my fault, thank you for being patient, I hope it’s worth it! Song lyrics pulled from “Wanted Dead Or Alive” by Bon Jovi, “Death of a Bachelor” by Panic! At The Disco, “Baby it’s Cold Outside” by Frank Loesser, and Dirty Dancing’s “(I’ve Had) The Time of My Life”.

My Masterlist

Stripping off the last of your combat gear with an exaggerated groan you tossed it in the corner of your bathroom on top of an embarrassingly large pile of dirty clothes. Guess I know how I’ll be spending my weekend. You started the shower, setting it as hot as you could stand and spent several minutes just letting the heat and the steam relax your tired muscles. Note to self: thank Tony for the endless supply of hot water in this place. You grudgingly went through the motions of washing the last remnants of the mission from your skin and hair, more eager than ever to collapse into the comfort of your bed.

Shutting off the water you reached for your towel, the details of the mission swimming through your mind. You started absentmindedly humming along with the singing coming from… wait, singing..? I didn’t… where is that coming from…?

It's all the same, only the names will change Everyday, it seems we're wastin' away... Another place, where the faces are so cold, I drive all night, just to get back home

I'm a cowboy, on a steel horse I ride I'm wanted, dead or alive Wanted.. dead or alive

Looking around for the source of the sound you quickly realized it was coming from the vents. Wow, whoever that is they are really good. You smiled to yourself, listening until the voice gradually faded away. Looks like someone on the team has a hidden talent. But who…?

It didn’t take long to figure out, especially with FRIDAY’s helpful assistance. With your room being at the far end of the floor your bathroom and the bathroom for the person across the hall were positioned right next to each other, much closer in proximity than anyone else’s. It had to be him. Freaking Bucky Barnes. You felt your cheeks warm just at the thought of him. There was no denying you harbored an attraction for the supersoldier. Strong, protective, a gentleman, and now I find out the man can sing? Is there anything he can’t do? Sighing you flopped down across your bed, Bucky’s crooning voice filling your thoughts as exhaustion finally claimed you and you fell fast asleep.

Training had been super intense that morning. You appreciated the new moves Nat was teaching you but that didn’t make your muscles hurt any less. Desperate for a shower you decided to skip breakfast and just grab a snack instead before heading to your room. As you entered the kitchen you saw Bucky rummaging around in the fridge, humming quietly to himself.

“Hey Barnes, toss me a bottle of water?” Grabbing an energy bar from the pantry you turned and saw that Bucky hadn’t moved. “Buck?” Still nothing. You raised your voice slightly. “Bucky!” Is he ignoring me or what? After a moment of hesitation you stepped close enough to poke him in his ribs causing him to jump and hit his head against the fridge door.

“Dammit! What the hell..?” He gingerly rubbed the back of his head with his flesh hand and yanked out his earbuds with the other. “You know (Y/N), it’s never a good idea to sneak up on an assassin. Not if you value life and limb.” He was trying his best to hold a serious face but you could see just a hint of a smirk edging in.

“And here I thought it was impossible to sneak up on you. I would say my skills are improving but that would be a lie.” You smiled apologetically, gesturing towards his earbuds which were still pumping out the faint strains of something. “Sounds like maybe you were really into whatever you were listening to…?”

“Huh? Oh, right…” He pulled his phone from his pocket and paused the music. “Yeah, Shuri set me up with this music app and Steve and Sam have been making some suggestions. Just trying to get caught up ya know.” He shrugged his shoulders, scrolling through his playlists.

“Hey, um I have that app too... If you want I could share some playlists with you?” You bit your lip feeling shy all of a sudden.

“Ah.. yeah, yeah I’d like that.” Bucky handed you his phone with a small smile and you made sure the two of you were connected through the app.

“I’ll see what I can put together for you then.” You grabbed your stuff and headed for the door, smiling like crazy once you rounded the corner on your way to your room and a much needed hot shower.

A few minutes and several gallons of water later you heard it again, the beautiful baritone of a certain handsome brunette floating out of the vents...

Do I look lonely? I see the shadows on my face, People have told me I don't look the same... Maybe I lost weight, I'm playing hooky with the best of the best, Put my heart on my chest so that you can see it, too

A girl could get used to this. You grinned, taking your time drying off so you could enjoy every single note.

I shouldn’t feel weird, right? Just because I’m actively trying to figure out when Bucky is going to be showering so I can eavesdrop on him singing? Hahaha, that’s not creepy at ALL. You groaned and buried your face in your hands at the breakfast table. This was an argument you’ve been having with yourself for weeks. It was almost as if you’d become addicted to his voice, the more you listened the more you wanted and if you were being honest with yourself, the more you listened the more you wished he was singing to you.. for you. And it had only gotten worse when he started singing songs from the playlists you’d been sending him. I swear if he sings Shawn Mendes again I’m gonna need a cold shower to follow my regular shower.

“Hey (Y/N), you ready for our run?” Thankful that your mental conflict was interrupted by the Captain you nodded your head and hopped up to do a few stretches. For once you were looking forward to a good run. The days had finally started to turn cooler and there was just something about fall transitioning into winter that excited you and made you want to get out in it. Way more motivating than running in hundred degree heat for sure, not that Steve noticed with all the supersoldier benefits he ended up with. “Good. Bucky and Sam are gonna meet us downstairs.”

Cool weather and a rear view of the Winter Soldier? Now that’s something I can get behind. You giggled quietly to yourself, earning a curious glance from Steve as you entered the elevator. “Just um, something funny Nat told me earlier. You know her, so funny…” You smiled weakly and cringed inwardly but fortunately Steve was distracted by your arrival at the ground floor. The four of you exchanged brief good mornings, not wasting any time before you literally hit the ground running. You and Sam paired off behind Steve and Bucky, soon finding your groove, laughing together every time you got lapped by Steve on Sam’s left and Bucky on your right. After about an hour of this you and Sam headed back to the tower to hit the showers. As you stepped into your bathroom you couldn’t help but smile thinking of how by the time you were done Bucky would surely be starting his own shower and you couldn’t wait to hear his song choice today.

Wrapping your towel around you, you paused, sure you had heard something... but no. Great, now my mind has decided to play tricks on me. Shaking your head you turned to head back into your room but you just couldn’t stop yourself from gravitating back towards the vent, leaning against the wall just under the opening. You closed your eyes, letting your head fall back against the smooth surface. What are you doing (Y/N)… just go get ready already, he’s probably not even in… there…? Your face slowly morphed from a mask of frustration into one of absolute awe as the first strains of one of your favorite songs of all time floated through the vent and into your ears.

Hmm-mm-mm-mm... Baby it's cold outside, Hmm-mm-mm-mm... But baby it's cold outside, Hmm-mm-mm-mm-mm... Been hoping you'd drop in, Hmm-mm-mm-mm... I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice…

You slowly slid down the wall, sitting on the floor and smiling wider than you had in quite awhile, humming along at first but slowly slipping into the lyrics with practiced ease:

(My mother will start to worry) Beautiful, what’s your hurry, (My father will be pacing the floor) Listen to the fireplace roar, (So really I'd better scurry) Beautiful please don't hurry, (Well maybe just a half a drink more) Put some records on while I pour…

Getting lost in the music you imagined what it would be like for you to be singing with Bucky for real, in person. You could see it so clearly, you and Bucky, bundled up together in a nest of blankets and pillows in front of a roaring fire while snow fell outside. What I wouldn’t give… You smiled at how easily your voices fit together, your volume gradually increasing as you got more and more into the song:

(The neighbors might think) Baby it's bad out there, (Say what's in this drink) No cabs to be had out there, (I wish I knew how) Your eyes are like starlight now, (To break this spell) I'll take your hat, your hair looks swell, (I ought to say no no) Mind if I move in closer, (At least I'm going to say I tried) What's the sense of hurting my pride, (I really can't stay) Baby don't hold out, Baby it's cold outside!

Your eyes flew open and you froze, suddenly realizing that your voice was the only one singing that last line. Oh no no no no… Scrambling to your feet you held your breath, listening for any sound that might reassure you that Bucky didn’t hear you but you were only met with silence. You cursed inwardly, wringing your hands and pacing around your room. Maybe… maybe he doesn’t know it’s me? You groaned out loud. Oh who am I kidding he’s totally gonna figure it out. Okay, okay... let’s not get hysterical now, I mean, what’s the worst that could happen? You took a deep breath only to release another defeated groan. Well he could be super pissed and never speak to me again. Okay, yeah that pretty much sucks.

Completely wrapped up in your thoughts you barely registered the persistent knocking at your door, absently crossing the room to open it. “Alright, alright I’m coming! Seriously can’t a girl go through a crisis in peace…?” That last word died on your lips and was followed by what could only be described as a very undignified squeak as your eyes took in the sight of one James Buchanan Barnes, slightly out of breath and standing in your doorway. He was shirtless and wearing Jesus take the wheel only a towel wrapped around his waist, his hair still wet, wet enough that drops were randomly falling onto his very muscular and did I already mention this well let me say it again very naked chest, lazily travelling the length of his torso down past his abs to… SNAP OUT OF IT WOMAN! Quit being a perv and look at his face!

Meeting his eyes you felt the butterflies in your tummy start to churn. “B-Bucky..? Hey, um what are you--?”

“That was you, wasn’t it?” His words rushed out at you, tinged with just enough of a sense of urgency to kick those butterflies in your stomach into a frenzy.

“I, um, what do you, I-I mean what are you talking about?” Your efforts at keeping the nervousness out of your voice were failing and you couldn’t stop your fingers from fidgeting.

Bucky took a second to look down the hallway then stepped into your room, lowering his voice. “Just now?” Your attempt at a clueless face only made him roll his eyes. “Singing, in the shower? That was you, right?”

You swallowed nervously, looking away as you realized it was pointless to keep trying to deny it. You nodded slightly, your worry bleeding into your voice now. “Are.. are you mad at me? I-I haven’t told anyone I swear!”

He shook his head slightly, rubbing his hand over his face with a sigh, “Geez doll, no... I’m not mad, I’m not... I don’t know what I am…”

Now that the truth was out your word vomit just kept coming. “I just.. I love it when you sing. You sound so good and you know the words to like everything and---”

“Wait…” Bucky narrowed his eyes. “ Exactly how long have you been listening to me sing in the shower?”

You cringed but it was too late now. “Um… a few months?” Bucky just stared at you with his mouth hanging open. “I know, I know, I should have said something and now that it’s all coming out I realize I totally invaded your privacy but.. ugh what was I supposed to do? Barge over there and tell you to stop? Now that, that would be the real crime.”

Bucky rolled his eyes, “Whatever you say doll, nobody was ever supposed to hear me anyway.”

“Are you kidding? Bucky you are amazing, like super talented. Four chair turn on The Voice good, I swear!” Before you could talk yourself out of it you reached up to cup his jaw, gently turning his head so his eyes met yours. “Hey, music is obviously a part of you. I get that you’re not ready to share it with everyone and I respect that. But… I’m not gonna apologize for not saying something. I meant what I said, I love it when you sing.”

“Well.. thanks, doll.” Smiling down at you Bucky leaned in for a hug but immediately jumped back, looking you up and down as if just now realizing that both of you were barely covered. “Holy hell doll you, you’re just in a… and I’m only… I, uh..” He was getting more and more flustered by the second and it was all you could do to suppress your giggles.

“Wow... I didn’t know a blush could go that far Barnes. Eyes up here, soldier.” Bucky’s eyes shot back up to yours, wide as saucers and his body super tense like he might dart any second. “Relax Buck, it’s fine, promise. Listen, how about we both put more clothes on and you let me take you out to lunch as my way of making amends. We can even go to that diner you’ve been dying to try. Deal?”

It took him a second but to your relief he relaxed, that lopsided smile that you loved finally making an appearance. “Deal, but I’m driving.”

“So karaoke night, huh? What brought this on (Y/N)?” Natasha slid into the seat next to you as the crowd erupted in cheers for Tony’s rendition of The Clash’s “Should I Stay or Should I Go”.

“Come on, do I really need a reason to plan a night out with my friends?” You bumped Nat’s shoulder and she smiled at you over her drink. “Plus, who doesn’t love karaoke? I mean, you can’t let a little thing like total humiliation get in the way of having a good time.”

“I’m all in,” Sam shouted from across the table. “It’s been way too long since we all got together outside of a world ending event. Heck, you even got Barnes to leave the tower for once. Where is he anyway? Don’t tell me he’s skipped out early.”

Before you can answer the music for the next singer starts. Everyone’s attention is turned back toward the stage where a tall, muscular man is sitting on a stool. A curtain of hair is obscuring most of his face and a distinctive metal arm is glinting in the spotlight.

Now I've, had the time of my life, No I’ve never felt like this before. Yes I swear, it's the truth, And I owe it all to you--

“Holy sh--” Sam looks at you, then back to the stage, then back to you, his mouth trying to form words but failing.

“Pick your jaw up off the floor, birdman.” Grinning like the cat that got the cream you patted him on the cheek. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I believe that’s my cue.”

'Cause I've, had the time of my life, And I owe it all to you...

Bucky takes your hand, helping you onstage then kissing your knuckles with a wink and a smile.

I've been waiting for so long, Now I've finally found someone to stand by me.

We saw the writing on the wall, As we felt this magical fantasy.

Now with passion in our eyes, There's no way we could disguise it secretly. So we take each other's hand, 'Cause we seem to understand the urgency

Being up there with Bucky, singing your heart out, you swore you’d never been happier. And you were so glad you finally convinced him that this was the perfect way to tell everyone that you were officially together.

Just remember You're the one thing, I can't get enough of So I'll tell you something, This could be love Because I've, had the time of my life, No I never felt this way before. Yes I swear, it's the truth, and I owe it all to you…

As the song ended Bucky pulled you into his arms, kissing you breathless until the whoops and hollering from your friends and teammates had you both laughing too hard to continue. “I love you, doll,” Bucky pressed his forehead to yours, grinning from ear to ear.

“I love you too, partner,” you kissed him once more before dragging him off the stage and over to where everyone was impatiently waiting to congratulate you both.

Taggy tag tags: @dianelogan @bucky-plums-barnes @buckyywiththegoodhair @cate-lynne @avengerofyourheart @sebspocketsquare @sgtbxckybxrnes @bionic-buckyb  @plumfondler @imaginingbucky @sexonastickstan @angryschnauzer @witchymarvelspacecase @palaiasaurus64 @eyecandybarnes @promarvelfangirl @the-observant-fangirl @ballyhoobarnes @trinityjadec @kjs-s @sebbytrash @idreaminpaint @true-queen-of-mischief @buckthegrump @moondancewrites @thisisjamesbarnes @beccaanne814 @oneshot-shit

[aikainkauna]

Movie meeeehm

Thanks to @nitrateglow for these!

1: A movie you enjoyed as a kid that you don't now

-Probs some comedy I'd find awfully sexist/racist/homophobic etc. now. But of course, I can't recall a specific one, probs because the experience is so deeply squicky and traumatic. Oh, wait, I know. I adored The Great Mouse Detective as a kid, but have heard so many "bleh" comments about it later that I don't want to ruin it by rewatching it as an adult. Why take a happy, cherished, pure and joyous memory away, especially as there are so few of those in my life anyway in proportion to the bad memories?

2: A movie you disliked as a kid that you like/love now

-Not a movie, but I was literally too fucking terrified to watch Doctor Who as a kid on cable, because the Tom Baker repeats they were showing terrified me with the title sequence alone. That empty stare and howling, diddly-duming music were enough to give me nightmares. So I only got into Who in my late teens!

3: Your favorite movie as a kid

-Define "kid." I went through several. I loved the Disney Robin Hood, of course, and at puberty, Wayne's World (yes) and The Princess Bride were my own cult movies, before I had anyone to fangirl them with. Ah, the pre-Internet era.

4: An actor/actress it took you time to warm up to

I remember being weirdly terrified and disturbed by Jeremy Brett as a kid, but then I felt the same about Bowie, and... well. Clearly it was my baby self not knowing WTF to do with all this stirring, restless energy that later turned out to be my skinnyandrogynousbisexualguy orientation thingy. And while I'd first seen Caligari and Casablanca as a teen in the early 90s, I wasn't ready for Connie until he pounced me in 2012. I would not have "got" him the same way and as hard until I was a grown-up, with a wide variety of experiences from many areas of life and a boatload of books/learning behind me. Just... no way.

5: A director it took you time to warm up to

-If anything, I've cooled off various directors I was impressed by when younger. So much of the auteur stuff gets wanky and self-imposing, in this Arrogant Artist Guy "look at my GENIUS big VISION and also insecurity about my penis size" kind of way. I like directors who can be warm and have fun and who show some real humanity (not wanky anvilly/kitchen sink-y sort of "humanity" either). Maybe Branagh? I found him a bit annoying as a kid, but now fap all over his stuff because now I'm old enough to Get It. He is the best kind of fanboy director; his geekiness is catching. Listening to his Thor commentary was a real eye-opener into my realising just how massive a nerd he is, and in a good, "one of us" kind of way.

6: Top five favorite soundtracks of your favorite movie composer

-There isn't just one! But Clint Mansell and Debbie Wiseman turn to gold everything they touch. Debbie especially is hugely unknown still, but she has this most amazing, swellingly Romantic music full of sweeping emotion that I just can't rec her enough. Do check her out; she'll give you goosebumps.

7: Three movies that defined your teen/childhood years

-I think I mentioned those already! But as a teenager, Bram Stoker's Dracula, La Reine Margot and Heavenly Creatures were formative. There were others I obsessed about way more than those, but they weren't as influential--it's more like they were massaging buttons I already had.

8: Sci-fi or westerns?

-Blake's 7! AKA "The Dirty Dozen in Space."

9: Are there any movies you own more than one copy of?

-Ahhahaha. AAAHHAHAHAHA! Of The Thief of Bagdad, I own: The Criterion clusterfuck with the awful clumsy cover someone had their 5-year-old draw, the Nordic DVD, the German Blu-Ray because I live on the edge (what with those Veidt Eye Closeups in HD being a hazard to any uterus) and at least three different digital copies. Because I'm me. I also own two digital copies and one DVD of Casablanca, three digital and one DVD of A Woman's Face and don't get me started on the British telefantasy I have on both DVD and VHS. I have spare copies of both the Caligari Masters of Cinema release and the ITV DVD of The Spy In Black, so I guess I should throw them at somebody.

10: Physical media or streaming?

-Neither. Video files firmly saved onto and run from my hard drive. Fuck streaming with its choppiness (ruins the viewing experience for me) and physical media are usually beyond my budget (unless I save up for a Connie DVD). Besides, I rip my favourite movie discs onto my HD anyway. I want to be able to gif that shit, dammit!

11: Are there any movies you watch on special occasions every year (Christmas, Halloween, birthdays, your mother's aunt's wedding anniversary, etc.)

-Used to do Nightmare Before Christmas on Halloween, but not any more. I still attempt ToB every Christmas. And I used to do All Through The Night with wine on my birthday, but as I can't tolerate alcohol anymore, the experience of Watching ATTN Drunk is no more. Someone start a Halloween tradition with me where we watch either The Student of Prague or Eerie Tales (or both) every year?

12: What movie do you most associate with your best friend(s)?

-Gosh, so few have stayed, so it's more like "movie that reminds you of a broken friendship," yay...?! I've learned to try and not associate movies with people that way any more, because it's more painful than it's worth. Connie is my best friend. He's like Krishna that way.

13: Name a movie adaptation you thought was better than or equal to its source material.

-LOTR put in more facial features and characterisation than Tolkien ever did, and did the tales far less fucking tediously. Imagine if you'd had to sit and watch hobbits walking through the countryside for 6 hours with barely anything happening?! Yeah...

14: What genres do your favorite movies tend to be?

-Historical, fantasy, Gothic Romantic, just Romantic stuff on the whole. More old than new movies these days. Why watch shitty modern chick flicks when I have far better characterisation and far less narrowly defined female lives in old-timey "women's pictures?" And guys who actually fucking shaved, dressed in clothes that were tailored for them instead of rented and saggy, whose bodily expressions weren't frozen for fear of "fagginess," and who weren't pumped full of 'roids.

15: Are you a fan of period dramas and if so, what era do you enjoy best?

-Yes. I love me some costume dramas, but I am seriously picky about them--most post-90s ones have been fucking awful and tend to feature shitty costumes and unkempt hair that would've sent real historical people to Bedlam, wobblycam from hell, vomit-inducingly excessive modernisation to be "edgy", and that one painfully skeletal bint they shove into every period drama ever these days, so it's... slim pickings for a history nerd, these days. There aren't many good ones set in the 17th century/Baroque era, which I love the most: the two Baroque dramas I wholeheartedly love are both series. (The Devil's Whore and By The Sword Divided.) The Angeliques and Musketeer adaptations are riddled with flaws, but there are some glowing bits within. As for The Golden Age of Islam... bloody hell, there really aren't that many good ones out there, are there?! ToB and Jodhaa Akbar and Disney's Aladdin, obviously. La Reine Margot isn't "my" period but it's great, as is Dangerous Liaisons (also not my period)--those are so fucking perfect. And the Connie period dramas, well... I think of them as primarily "silent movies" or "old movies," actually. Of those, The Student of Prague, ToB and The Wandering Jew are the best "costume" ones, IMHO. (I'd probs enjoy Lucrezia Borgia and Carlos and Elisabeth way more, were the copies we have not so smudgy.)

16: Name a movie you love that you would recommend to just about everyone.

-Ah, but we know there are always cynical cunts out there who'd give even Casablanca two stars, so what's the point? I'd still recommend it, though. And The Lion King, I guess.

17: Name a movie you love that you consider an acquired taste.

-Honestly, I'm thinking of telly rather than movies again. You will pry my cherished copy of The Time Monster from my cold, dead hands. Does The Devil of Winterborne count as a movie or TV? That's how far back my love for Mark Gatiss goes. Um... Don't Be A Menace To South Central While Drinking Your Juice In The Hood makes me fucking cry with laughter (the comedic timing is what does it. *beat* "Ain't dat some shit!"). Of Connie's oeuvre, yes, I know Bella Donna is rubbish, but Connie and Mary are SIZZLING and horny and juicy and it's Valid as a BDSM porn movie. And the novel is actually good.

18: Name a film you like directed by/starring a filmmaker/actor you normally don't care for.

-Not so much actor/director, but I did *not* expect to love Thor as much as I did, because I expected a dumb popcorn movie but got great adventure cinema with a touch of Shakespeare instead. I really am not the right audience for regular Marvel features at all, before or after. Fuck Marvel up its dumb macho Republican ass. But Thor is fucking beautiful and operatic and poetic and majestic and Pagan and shit. Branagh knows what I like.

19: Name a movie that blew your mind.

-A Woman's Face (1941). Because. Holy. Fuck. How can I keep on finding yet more details in it six years after first watching it, having watched it countless times by now?! And obvs all the other stuff, like the shockingly good female POV, amazing and complex woman protagonist, amazing writing, amazing ensemble cast, amazing direction, amazing lighting, amazing evil Torsten Slinkypussy Barring and The. Goddamn. Attic. Scene.

20: What genre mash-up would you most love to see that either hasn't been done yet or hasn't been done enough?

-Feminist-savvy historical romance with fantasy elements and hot explicit sex that's not shit. Basically, like the stuff you see in my fics, but better paced and woven into coherent adventure movies.

21: The coolest movie you've ever seen

-Too, too many. But Bogie was the coolest. And Claude Rains had the best acting skills. And Conrad Veidt was Conrad motherfucking Veidt. So what with those three mountains of coolness all converging under the Moroccan sky, I'm sure it's safe to say "Casablanca."

[emilyyhill]

Doing the health thing.

As many of you know, the past four to six months has been an absolute roller coaster for me health wise. I have had more diagnoses than I can count on one hand but nothing was drastic enough for to elicit a dramatic response. So I kind of just wandered through this ridiculous season until everything clicked and we worked something out.

Now I’ve only felt good for three weeks, so I’m still taking this very slow. I am not getting too excited just yet. But:

I went super MIA for a good while there. As I’ve reemerged and shared what’s been happening with friends, I hear so many people saying “I feel like that too!” or asking “How on Earth did you get better?” So here we are. The list of things I’m doing to help get/keep me healthy.

Now I’m not a doctor or health professional by any stretch – this is purely what I’ve done and what MY TEST RESULTS informed MY DOCTORS and HEALTH PEOPLE. So please don’t take this as gospel truth.

But I feel like I have some advice for those feeling a bit stuck in a cycle of health that definitely isn’t what it should be.

First things first, it’s not normal to be exhausted. Full stop. We live in a society where we are busy all the time, and a lot of us are unknowingly addicted to a substance (*cough* coffee *cough*) to try and alleviate underlying sleep deprivation. This is not sustainable – you should never be that busy that you are always feeling like you need a weeks worth of sleep.

It’s also not normal to feel tired after 8-10 hours of sleep. Fatigue and daytime sleepiness is a HUGE indicator that your body is not functioning at its peak. It means that something is lacking: whether it be sleep, nutrients, water, positivity – all of things contribute to our energy levels.

For example, fatigue and daytime sleepiness can be a symptom of: • Low iron or excess iron – iron’s can be annoying like that; • Mental health conditions like depression or anxiety; • Food intolerance and IBS; • Sleep apnea or poor sleep routines; • Low blood pressure; • Glandular fever or cytomegalovirus (or a bunch of other viruses); • Super simple things, like dehydration, jetlag or overeating (that post Christmas nap is definitely supported by s c i e n c e); • About a million other things.

So if you are feeling tired even after a regular night’s sleep, first consider your schedule and then consider a further investigation into the inner workings of that hot lil bod of yours 😏

I hear you: “That’s great Em. But who can help me? My doctor doesn’t care because I don’t have blood gushing out of a limb that’s falling off!” I feel you: My doctor ignored me for YEARS until I crashed real bad, and even then, he didn’t really care. *sigh* Not a fun time. Obviously I don’t go to that doctor anymore.

Go see a naturopath. But a good one. Not a hippie one.

Not that I’m against hippie naturopaths, I’m sure they are helpful too. But if a naturopath is going to be your main port of call for recovery, make sure you are seeing an experienced, degree qualified natural health specialist. Looking into your eyes with a shiny light is not enough on it’s own. Make sure they know their stuff.

Make sure they are using reputable brands of supplements (Metagenics, BioCeuticals, MediHerb etc.) that require practitioner prescriptions – in other words, you can’t just buy the supplements “over the counter”. And, they should recommend more than just essential oils.

Naturopathics can be a slow process, and it might take a while for you to see some changes. They look for the cause of the problem and try to resolve that, rather than putting band aids on things (an approach typically taken by mainstream medical doctors). But, for me, once we worked out what was causing my issues, it was a BINGO moment and I hit the health jackpot within DAYS.  

Heads up: naturopaths by definition are a bit alternative. They’ll definitely ask about your poo, want to poke you and their machines make weird sounds but hey, it’s usually pretty non-intrusive.

It can also be expensive, especially when you start taking supplements and vitamins. It’s also not recognised by Medicare or most private health insurance, so it’s usually an out of pocket expense. I totally understand that may not be feasible for everyone. But – if you can, I totally recommend.

I go to Don Graham at Vitage Naturopathics (Springwood). He and his wife Sandy are AMAZING, drop them a line here.

Don’t abandon your general practitioner or specialist.

Look, when things hurt or are causing significant disruptions – GO TO THE DOCTOR. When I’m covered in a heinous rash and I can’t sleep because of it, I can’t wait another three weeks to see the naturopath and then go on an elimination diet and try this, that, and the other. I NEED TO SLEEP DAMMIT. Get me onto those steroids, stat. But not before I take photos to show the naturopath later. It’s teamwork, look it up.

Keep a symptom diary.

We all like to think that we have a pretty good memory. You don’t. Your memory is shit. Write stuff down. Track your period, track your headaches, track the days you have explosive diarrhoea and the days you are constipated. TRACK ALL YOUR SYMPTOMS. 

Whether you go to a naturopath or a doctor, having it all on paper with dates will help you figure out if there are any patterns or if you’re just a loose cannon (still sad about Luke from Survivor, so here’s a meme in his honor).

Find yourself some good friends.

Heck, chronic illness can be lonely as hell. You miss out on parties, on coffee catch ups. you have to drop activities that you did with friends (like going to gym classes or walking your puppies together).

Research has shown that people who report high levels on loneliness are also more likely to develop both short and long term illnesses, ranging from colds to dementia. Loneliness will make it so much harder for you to get better, both physically and mentally.

So what happens when you might drop off the radar for days, weeks, or months at a time?

Rely on incredible friends who understand that every plan is tentative pending health. Find those people who will check in with you when you’ve been a bit MIA, and are willing to ditch the cute café for a cup of tea in your lounge room when can’t get yourself out of the house.

In saying that, reach out to people. Don’t expect everyone to know what’s going on, and still try to take the small steps you can to show people you still care (and just need a little extra love right now).

Be gracious with yourself and the state of your home – you don’t have to have everything perfectly together to invite someone over. Maybe you sit on the couch in your pyjamas and chat for a grand total of half an hour because that is all you can manage. If so, that’s okay! You made an effort, and when you have such little capacity, that will scream volumes to your friends.

Embrace the discomfort of making changes.

I cringe a little bit every time I, a girl wearing a dress with cons, order a soy flat white in my pink Pottery for the Planet keep cup, but hey, we’re embracing the discomfort.

I had to give up God’s most precious gift to humanity: the humble smoked almond. Don’t even get me started on hummus. Yet here we are, feeling a million times better for it. Thank God for a sneaky cheat moment here and there (not a whole day or I’d look like a 22 week pregnant lady…).

Problem was – unbeknownst to me, I relied on food for comfort. It was always familiar; I KNEW I’d feel emotionally better after some cheese and a choccy milk. I had to realise that I needed healthier coping strategies now other than food – like meditation and exercise and… actually dealing with my problems. Ugh.

I also had to embrace the fact that people loved me even when I couldn’t do anything for them. I was still a part of my church when I couldn’t serve on team. My family still loved me when I didn’t contribute to the dishes for a while.

My worth to people isn’t attached to what I can do for them and that was a huge thing for me to learn. I probably would not have fully understood that lesson had I not been so absolutely unable to do anything for anyone but myself.

Embrace the discomfort – you’ll grow from it. I promise.

Find things that you like!

Let’s talk about healthy juices. With this list of food intolerances rounding up at SEVENTEEN, a lot of my faves got the cut (see ya honey, pineapple, mango etc. etc.). You know what didn’t get the cut? BLOODY SPINACH. What is full of iron and good for your belly? SPINACH. What am I eating a lot of right now? SPINACH. 

I don’t love spinach, but when combined with other things and blended to a pulp, it can be good. The only way you are going to stick to a new lifestyle is by finding things you like. Plus, life is way to short to drink gross smoothies every day.

It could be that you try to find new forms of exercise that are better for your condition - I recently discovered yoga and climbing, both of which are heaps less taxing on my adrenal glands and therefore better for my fatigue.  

It may be new routines – I have to go to bed earlier than before which means I often can’t spend time with friends on “school nights”. I had to shift my hours at work from 8 to 4 to 10 to 6 so that I could do what I need to do in the morning before work.

It might be swapping to new products - I changed my skin care products because I was allergic to one of the chemicals in the one I had been using for years. 

It’s trial and error – you have to be open to trying new things, and deal with the fall out of some changes doing more damage than before. But when you work out what works, it’s like a whole new person. Trust me on this, yeah? It pays off in the long run.

Be diligent.

It can be frustrating and it can be so hard not to see the pay off until the long run. Taking your pills twice a day, drinking your veggie smoothie thing twice a day, consistently putting your health first when you just want to go out and eat freaking cheese pizza. I get it, it’s tedious. But consistency is key. It’ll happen and you’ll build a new routine and relish in all your new found health and wellness. YAY.

Pay attention to your mind, not just your body.

The way we think about our body has HUGE implications on our physical health. I touched on this earlier with the loneliness thing. The same principle expands to positivity, to courage, to telling ourselves that our body is strong and rebuilding, not a piece of shit that’s not doing its job. Spend time meditating, reading, reflecting, feeding your mind good thoughts while we feed our bodies with good food!

Wow this got pretty long. If you’re still here, congrats. I really do hope you got something good out of it – even if it’s that you should definitely go buy some smoked almonds because they are something wonderful that this Earth does not deserve.

Hit me up if you ever want to chat! Always open, always keen, available sometimes (because recovering and still kinda tired…).

All my love, E x

[vee-blackwell]

i got a bout of depression that hit tonight from not being distracted enough to avoid getting in my own head and i think i had too many bad thoughts about who i am VS family acceptance

my queer things, my interest things, my (lack of) set goals.

it hurt a lot to try and explain transgender things to my gramma while watching I Am Jazz, when talking about nonbinary people using “they/them” pronouns, she essentially said that if you dont use he/him or she/her then you have no gender “so you’re just nothing” which was just too close to home (literally) for me to hear as someone who doesnt feel anywhere close to any definition of gender, and am definitely not enough % to feel comfortable going on the male side of the binary.

that’s the hard part of that. it seems like it would be easier to tell her i’m bisexual or something (another term that doesnt really match me, but explaining asexuality or the differences between pansexual and bisexual self-identities is another thing thats hard to do with an 86 year old woman). but then what if it changes how she asks me about anyone i hang out with or makes weird assumptions about my relationships?

but at the same time, in watching this show with her, where she’s trying her best to be open-minded and learn about transgender people via watching I Am Jazz, she starts asking me to explain things in the show. not in a negative way, again, shes trying to understand which is more than i could hope for other 80+ year old grandparents. but then she asks me how i know so much about transgender people and issues they face when its things she doesnt expect people i know in real life, close to me, to have dealt with yet. and i have to play the “Educated Ally” instead of the “Depressed, Closeted Transperson” and hope she doesnt go from asking about my friends that are out to wondering about me. because it just makes me fearful of being in another time period of living in an abusive and unsupportive / negligent household where i never feel safe and im constantly arguing with my family. and i dont need that, or even to feel like im risking getting to that point again

i at least want to feel like i wouldnt be kicked out of the house and become homeless, or stop getting money from my family if i came out at all... but how many other transpeople had the same thoughts and were totally wrong? my mom who watched some of the show with us today almost immediately misgendered one of the transgirls on the show, talking about how **she (i dont want to misgender even by quoting my mom) clearly didnt have hormone blockers as long as Jazz because **her voice had changed. and it’s like, alright, she uses a feminine name, looks like any other normal high school girl, and has been working to try and get her voice to pass better, and it’s still so easy for ignorant people like my mom to pick up on that one thing they feel doesn’t fit right and just misgender someone immediately. and it’s worrisome. because i know how easy it is for “the average adult” around my mom’s age to miss the point entirely on how someone works to transition and making their own personal choices

...

im just queer and tired and fearful. my mind screaming at me “do SOMEthing” every time i wake up is like the echo of a broken record player that’s playing somewhere i can barely hear it. so i do something. i get a food. i grab a game. i grab my phone for games. i grab a video, or a game tutorial, or ANOTHER computer game, or i go on social media sites. and i do all these empty “SOMEthings” to mute the bad thoughts like the ones above. the ones that both overwhelm me into submission and also make me numb to any emotions.

i get bored of the phone game, the magickarp jump cooldown timers are all that’s left.

i get bored of harvest moon, after realizing that i was 1 floor away from the bottom of the mines last time i get frustrated. do i go back for it again and make the long boring trek, or do i go back to grinding cooking recipes so i can finally make that god damn tempura meal? each day passes as quickly or as stagnantly as i please thanks to my emulator. freeze time and do my daily farm chores, use the inventory item dupe glitch to keep stocked every gift item i need to give everyone, show everyone on the local islands my pets for bonus friendship points, unfreeze time so that the one fisherman character will finally show up to talk to and i give him his daily gift and show him my dog, i go fishing with frozen or unfrozen time as i choose. the day is done. time for the next one.

i get bored of the computer games that both tantalize me into playing them because i love them and want the mental stimulation, yet the other screens beckon to me stronger, and i sit on the 3 blue hellsites, toggling between them in mixed intervals.

i get bored of neopets, because it is after midnight and its the 3rd day in the row i forgot to do my dailies. god DAMMIT i’m never going to get trudy’s shitty 30 day bonus spin for those 100k neopoints if i keep this up. i go onto the help boards, and bump up the lottery board. copy and paste my old post, add the moneybag emoticon and congrats the winners. short list gives the UNs. long list gets generalized. the regular group of lottery players and bumpers congratulate and recognize each other, making the odd chat message about their lives. this is as far as i chat on the neoboards now because i have no social energy otherwise to talk to other neopets friends about how life is still depressing, and trying to speak around the child filters and character limits.

i go to my mom’s room, its hard to predict if she’ll be home at 5 pm or 8 pm or 11 pm or gone to her shitty boyfriend’s house. it had been GTA V. then crash bandicoot warped (ps3 port). and now skyrim with the DLC. i play it as i spend my life, there are markers telling me where i should go for quests to progress, yet i wander aimless around the world finding something more interesting to explore until i finally remember what i meant to do. my mom comes home, and i ask if she wants me to get out so she can sleep. she says its fine, and leaves the lamp on shining on her bed. it becomes after midnight, my gramma scolds me for staying in there when my mom is sleeping. while i agree, my hyperfocus is hard to break, and it still takes me more time than it should to simply save and quit in the middle of my doing nothing of importance in the game that i play for the middle of my doing nothing of important in my life.

i eat wherever i spend my activity. TV tray by my bed at all times now, my propel bottle sways like a top heavy asshole everytime its moved. the tissue box takes up space for food, but everytime i move it on my bed its either in the way or not close enough to use when i need it. my nose is still almost ready to bleed from the dry summer air. im still dehydrated because i lack the ability to remember to drink the juice, milk, or propel bottles within arms reach.

it’s 3 am, or probably later. i ask joey if it’s time to sleep. i take my melatonin, we both brush our teeth and say goodnight. am i lying to him again this night, and apologizing and saying i’ll do it for real? this could happen twice before the guilt takes over and i either cave and do it for real, or stay awake focused on my daily nothingness distractions.

on the days its 5 am or later, my mom wakes for work. we talk about the cat. we always talk about the cat. sometimes she says her work is shit and that shes in pain. things that are obvious. she leaves for work and says goodnight to me in the hopes i go to sleep soon.

i sleep. around 11 am to 1 pm is around the time i get woken for my medications. anxiety, depression, birth control pill (1 daily for 3 weeks at a time). i have to eat and drink with it, so its something simple. on bad days i fall back asleep for over an hour. like a sloth, i drag the tray of food to me, resting the plate or bowl on my bed to eat as i stay laying down. sitting up means i feel more obligated to stay awake after this. i finish the food, drink, and my pills, and shove the tray back against my closet, and lie back down in bed forcing myself to sleep.

it becomes anywhere from 3 pm to 5 pm, on bad days its 6 and later. i lay in bed after waking up maybe two or three other times from sweating, or tossing and turning with bad dreams or being awake enough that i could get up, but unmotivated or too depressed to get up and have to be awake for that much more time. i crawl to the computer first, turning off my nightly music and going online on steam. just so whoever cares knows im awake. i go adjust the thermostat as both i need as well as what wont freeze my gramma to death (or at least to complaining for hours). i say that i dont know what i want for food. she offers a suggestion, and i say sure. i return to my room until food is brought to me, and i grab juice or milk to have with my meal. it probably gets cold if it was meant to be eaten hot.

i get a food. i grab a game. i grab my phone for games. i grab a video, or a game tutorial, or ANOTHER computer game, or i go on social media sites. and i do all these empty “SOMEthings” to mute the bad thoughts like the ones above. the ones that both overwhelm me into submission and also make me numb to any emotions. the pattern repeats.

...

this has been Vee Life Simulator. sorry. no refunds.