#send all the asks heheheheh

[riant-draws]

i NEED to chew him to pieces SO BAD in an affectionate way

sadly, i don't think he'll let you

[dykevanny]

had a really funny idea for an ask blog ft. Vanny and another plex employee oc,,

[c00kietin]

Hey- why do I have 300 followers all of a sudden O_O

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

MAC OHHH MY FUCKING GOD. ONE OF THE EPISODES OF A SHOW EVER HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE NORMAL AFTER THIS???? HOW???? how long is he going to be FUCKING DEAD FOR!!!! the ashe & mark argument that i felt deep within my soul & miserable on behalf of both parties about them!!! dakotaisms!!! the fucking like. genre conflict of their sillygoofy teen titans shenanigans with a real world where there r men with guns who will simply kill you!! THEYRE WEEKENDING AT BERNIES WILLIAM WISPS PURPLE MORPH SUIT COVERED CORPSE. kicking down your door with a loud bang & then just standing there wild eyed kind of shaking and trembling like a chihuahua

DUUUUDE DUDE DUDE DUDE HEAH. FUCK. s1e19 definitely one of my favorites of all time. i listened to that one during the back half of my shift this afternoon and got to the ashe/mark argument just as i was starting pm checks.... standing in the cramped laundry room in the basement washing my filter socks like

i think about them so much dude. AND THEYRE BOTH RIGHT. WHICH MAKES IT HURT MORE. LIKE. BOTH THEIR SIDES ARE SO REAL. i cannot wait for u to learn more about them pleaseeeee i need 2 talk winters family analysis with you when you get to . certain parts. season 2 is gonna fucking wreck u i know it.

BUT. THEY BALANCE IT OUT WITH THE SILLIES SO VERY FUCKING WELL. GOD. good fucking show dude. good fucking show !!!!!! williams ghost throwing ice cubes at mark while his fucking. rotting corpse sits in the bathtub!!! what thefuck man

[norrisainz33]

indy || po5

summary: after working a fellowship with mclaren f1 team, you get offered your dream job but the only catch is…. they’re actually sending you to indiana

pairing: pato o'ward x nonfamous!!reader

fc & warnings: becky g kinda and poorly translated spanish and very minor bad language

requested: yes!! omg my first pato fic and request! wahoooo!!!

masterlist

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ⠀

ynuser has made a post

liked by friend1, friend2, yourbff, yoursibling, friend3, friend4, and 543 others

ynuser: AMIGAS!!!! i landed my dream job!!! say hello to arrow mclaren's newest full time photographer!! but please be for real with me rn how many aura points am i losing by moving to indiana………

view all comments

friend1: ay dios mío. indianapolis??? wHY

ynuser: no ik BUT why NOT!?

yourbff: i’m so proud of you hermosa chica

ynuser: gracias mi amor

friend2: ngl homie …. a decent amount of aura points

ynuser: ok…. and if i said i actually applied to work in the uk with the mclaren f1 team but they said actually we wanna send you to indycar instead then would i gain any back?

friend2: now hold on you should’ve lead with that

yoursibling: nooooooo you’re leaving me to go to INDIANA?!

ynuser: visit me loser

yoursibling: no!

friend3: too busy looking at how hot you are to even react to the caption

ynuser: 😘😘😘😘😘

friend4: congrats bb girl

ynuser: gracias 🤍

ynuser has made a post

liked by friend2, friend1, yourbff, yoursibling, patriciooward, nolansiegel, davidmalukas, arrowmclaren, and 895 others

ynuser: shes beauty, shes grace, shes me trying to figure out what an overcut is (send help) 😌😌 had the best weekend in st pete! thanks for having me florida xx

view all comments

friend1: the way i have followed all indycar and arrow mclaren socials despite not even know what an indy car is just to see all the amazing pics mi amiga takes

ynuser: fan behavior! jk love you bebe

arrowmclaren: welcome to the team y/n!

ynuser: thank you arrowmclaren! couldn't be happier to be here

patriciooward: i'll teach you! solo di cuándo [just say when]

ynuser: 🤯 say less

yoursibling: oh so you'll invite me to indiana but not florida? fake

ynuser: ungrateful for the invite to my new home so no fun trips for youuuuuuu

yourbff: ok hermosa, lo que digas! [ok gorgeous, whatever you say]

ynuser: 😘😘

nolansiegel: great to meet you this weekend y/n! thanks for the sick pics

ynuser: likewise nolan!! ofc its literally my job

user1: so you're the photographer who took those perfect pics for me and my friends!! thank you for being so kind and for indulging us 🤍

ynuser: omg of course!! you guys had the cutest outfits there was no way i wasn't going to photograph xx

ynuser has posted to their private story

view all story replies

friend2: now hold up..... who dis?

ynusr: heheheheh a driver for mclaren

friend2: he can drive right into me fr

ynuser: ASFGNKF jajajajaja

yourbff: oh you weren't kidding he handsome handsome

ynuser: painfully so.... and he's so nice?? and funny?? and speaks spanish??? and laughed at all my jokes???? and said i looked pretty????? and explained all of indycar to me????

yourbff: nah im OUT

ynuser: he was like lowkey flirting and im freaking out

yourbff: DETAILS NOW

ynuser: well we went out for drinks after our media day here in long beach so he could give me a rundown of indycar right? and like it started professional but after a drink or two he put his hand on the back of my chair, leaned in way closer than necessary and started asking me all these questions about myself instead. like?? sir?? and the whole time his thumb was just casually rubbing little circles on my back like it was nothing??? i was trying to remember the different tire types and he’s over casually giving me bedroom eyes like its nothing. and MAYBE IT IS IDK!!!!

yourbff: i'm speechless. no one casually acts like that w out something behind it no no

ynuser: thats what im saying

yourbff: have you talked since?

ynuser: yes he texted me and said AND I QUOTE: "i really enjoyed getting to know you. lets do this again."

yourbff: i was JUST wearing my pants. no idea where they have gone.

yourbff: he wants you. only explanation.

ynuser: girl pls 😭😭😭😭😭😭

yoursibling: now you're posting a MAN ?! ay dios mío

ynuser: you will never let me live

friend3: your ability to make friend with everyone is incredible. i am so jealous of you

ynuser: omg stoppp

friend4: blah blah blah proper name back story

ynuser: you get it

friend5: i thought we were team penske in this house

ynuser: idk who house your in but it ain't mine!

paticiooward has added to his story

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user2: WHO THIS I INOW THAY AINT MY GIRL ELBA

frosenqvist: this who i think it is?

patriciooward: the chica i was talking about? yes 😏

frosenqvist: ohhhhh making moves huh?

patriciooward: if you mean getting her her favorite coffee and making her giggle then yes

frosenqvist: perfect

user4: PATITOT WHI IS THIS

davidmalukas: oh !

patriciooward: 😊

user5: ok so i’m gonna go camp at this coffee shop now

ynuser: omg not the candid what is this……. ugh at least i look good here

patriciooward: you look good everywhere

ynuser: omg 🥹 gracias pato

patriciooward: de nada y/n/n

user9: pato please don’t do this to me. i thought we had something special

nolansiegel: elba looks different here

patriciooward: hehe you know it’s not elba

nolansiegel: so things are going well with your girl then?

patriciooward: yes they are 😉

ynuser has posted to their private story

view all story replies

friend1: you look incredible

ynuser: thank you my love ❤️‍🔥

friend2: CAN HE FIGHT BC I WANT YOU

ynuser: honestly i don’t think he can but he won’t have to bc i’m all yours mi amiga

nolansiegel: omg bestie im a private story bestie i could cry

ynuser: you do realize you’re my favorite person in all of indiana right?

nolansiegel: omg this literally made my day i dont think you understand

nolansiegel: now tell me…… is this outfit for a certain teammate of mine 🤨

ynuser: 😔 maybe

nolansiegel: well between you and me that teammate can’t stop talking about how excited he is

ynuser: 😭😭😭😭😭

yourbff: YES YES YES A MILLION TIMES YES

ynuser: yayyyyy gracias!!

patriciooward: damn what other man is taking you out today

ynuser: haha ……. you weren’t supposed to see this i’m gonna die of embarrassment

patriciooward: oh so there is another man?! WHO?! nolan?! david m? JASON FROM FINANCE?!

ynuser: pato please 😭 the only person i’m going on a date with today is you

patricioooward: well in that case your outfit is perfect 😍😫 can’t believe you think i’m the hottest man you’ve ever seen

ynuser: i’m so embarrassed 😔😭 (but you are i can’t lie)

patriciooward: good thing i can’t lie either because i do think you’re the hottest woman i’ve ever seen

ynuser: ay dios mío stopppppp 😭😭😭

friend4: beautiful gorgeous perfect

ynuser: 🤍🤍🤍🤍

yoursibling: you look HOT however i find it horrifying that you’re letting a man take you out

ynuser: it is alarming ik but hes not just any man my dear

ynuser has made a post

liked friend1, arrowmclaren, yourbff, davidmalukas, froseqvist, friend2, yoursibling, friend3, coltonherta, logansargeant, and 4,329 others

ynuser: life is truly crazy because one minute you're crying about moving to a new town and the next you're working your dream job and taking pictures of your situationship going over 200 mph like its no big deal

view all comments

friend3: did i miss a chapter here 🤨

ynuser: i’ll call you 😌

davidmalukas: wait im in these pics can i be your situationship too?

ynuser: i mean…..

patriciooward: watch it both of you

friend2: tea tea tea

ynuser: 🤯

patriciooward: oh who that in the number 5 car?

ynuser: mmm just some guy idk

patriciooward: sabes que soy mucho más que un chico cualquiera. [you know i'm much more than just some guy]

user3: love your photos!!

ynuser: 🥹🥹 thank you

yourbff: oh so we’ve upgraded to situationship now?

ynuser: maybe 🫨

patriciooward: she’s playing hard to get 🙄 i thought she was my girlfriend

ynuser: i’m calling hr

yourbff: let’s not fight children

user2: i wish indycar had gossip pages like f1 bc this interaction would be doing insane numbers

yoursibling: wait why you kinda famous who are all these ppl

ynuser: i’m gonna blow up and act like i don’t know you

yoursibling: i believe it

arrowmclaren: we’re so glad you moved to the new city

ynuser: me too 🧡

user5: waitttt you are living the actual dream

ynuser: i am incredibly lucky 🧡

patriciooward has made a post

liked by lando, arrowmclaren, ynuser, yourbff, friend1, user2, user3, user4 and 184,246 others

patriciooward: we gave it everything out there for a beautiful p1! gracias por todo y gracias a mi novia por dejarme publicarla. dejó de hacerse la difícil 😉 [thank you for everything and thank you to my girlfriend for letting me post her. she stopped playing hard to get!]

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user1: felicitaciones!

yourbff: you can tell which pics she took and which one someone else took 😭

patriciooward: the professional was a bit busy in that second shot 😉

ynuser: orgullosa de ti 🧡 [proud of you]

patriciooward: gracias mi amor

lando: congrats on a strong weekend mate!

patriciooward: thanks champ!

user2: naurrrrrrrrrr you have a girlfriend?! congrats ig

frosenqvist: got the girl and the win! let’s go!

patriciooward: yes sir 😉

elbaoward: obsessed with everything about this 🤍

patriciooward: me too 😍

arrowmclaren: that’s our driver!!! [liked by patriciooward]

user4: wahooo patoooooooo

ynuser has made a post

liked by friend1, yourbff, patriciooward, elbaoward, nolansiegel, frosenqvist, yoursibling and 9,345 others

ynuser: dream job lead me to my dream man who woulda thought! patitio te amo mucho 🧡

view all comments

yourbff: que románticaaaaaaaa 😍 [how romantic]

ynuser: si si mami

user2: violently sobbing. i wish my job led me to pato oward [liked by ynuser]

nolansiegel: woohooo!! best hard launch ever

ynuser: thanks for the constant hype noly

patriciooward: why didnt i get the same nice comment from you nolan?

ynuser: bc he likes me more :)

nolansiegel: that is true unfortunately! pato who?

patriciooward: W O W

patriciooward: yo tambien te amo bebe [i love you too baby]

ynuser: siempre y para siempre [always and forever]

yoursibling: we've lost a real one chat

ynuser: or gained one depending on how you look at it

frined3: YYEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS [liked by ynuser]

friend4: i wanna be you when i grow up please

ynuser: and you can be easy peasy

user5: imma need you to post a story time about how you broke into motorsports and became a wag at the same time bc you are the blueprint [liked by ynuser]

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ⠀

a/n: thanks for reading! likes and reblogs are always appreciated.

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ⠀

disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction

© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform

[harunayuuka2060]

Chubby MC: *went to visit Coral Sea to give Jade and Floyd's birthday presents*

Azul: You're here. I thought you would try making excuses again.

Chubby MC: I was busy. And I can't breathe underwater.

Azul: I've been sending you potions to help you with that.

Chubby MC: Hm.

Azul: ...

Azul: *chuckles*

Azul: The twins are going to be happy to see you after not getting in touch for eight years.

Chubby MC: Sure.

Azul: ...

Azul: Is there something wrong?

Chubby MC: ...

Chubby MC: To be honest, I'm not thrilled to meet anybody from NRC.

Azul: Why is that?

Chubby MC: Imagine. Eight years and I still look like this. *sigh* Tch. I've been airing out my insecurities. I'll keep quiet now.

Azul: ...

Azul: So, what did you get for Floyd and Jade?

Chubby MC: Something's within my budget.

Azul: *chuckles* Cheapskate.

Chubby MC: *frowns*

Chubby MC: I'm just a minimum wage earner, you capitalist.

Azul: *laughs*

Floyd: Beluga-chan~! *squeezes them*

Chubby MC: Don't squeeze the air out of me!

Floyd: But I missed you so much~

Chubby MC: Yeah! Yeah! I get the message! Release me now!

Floyd: Hehe~ Okay~.

Chubby MC: *takes a deep breath in*

Floyd: So~ What's my present~?

Chubby MC: ...

Chubby MC: I got you this. *hands him a squishy hamster toy*

Floyd: Hehe~

Floyd: Hehehehehe~! So cuuuutee~!!!

Chubby MC: I made sure it's water proof.

Floyd: *hugs them* Thank you, Beluga-chan~!

Chubby MC: ...

Chubby MC: *smiles* You're welcome.

Jade: *wants to approach MC but the other guests are blocking him*

The guests: Happy birthday, Jade. You're really a grown up now.

Jade: *smiles* Thank you.

The guests: Have you considered getting married?

Jade: ...

Jade: *subtle smirk* Yes.

The guests: *smiling in relief*

Chubby MC: Looks like Jade is busy.

Azul: Why not approach him?

Chubby MC: ...

Chubby MC: No. I'll just leave my present for him with Floyd.

Chubby MC: Also, I think the effect of your potion is enough to get me back to the surface.

Azul: I asked you to bring three vials.

Chubby MC: Your message was too long. I didn't bother to read all of it.

Azul: You-

Chubby MC: Bye now.

Azul: ...

Azul: *sigh* Be careful on your way home.

Floyd: Here's Beluga-chan's present for you~.

Jade: *smiles* I like it. *MC bought him a pair of hiking boots as a gift*

Floyd: But you know, why you're so slow?

Jade: I beg to differ, Floyd.

Jade: There's time for everything.

Floyd: You think~? Because I'm guessing Beluga-chan doesn't even remember your promise~.

Jade: They do, otherwise, why would they remain single?

Floyd: *laughs*

Floyd: You're so full of yourself sometimes, Jade~.

Jade: You want to be their brother-in-law, right, Floyd? So I ask you to support me on this. *smiles*

[cherrynflowergarden]

જ⁀➴ chicago || loser!chris x dreamgirl!reader

sturniolo masterlist taglist

· · ─ ·˚⊱𓇼˖°🪷° ִֶָ☾.⊰˚· ─ · ·

· · ─ ·˚⊱𓇼˖°🪷° ִֶָ☾.⊰˚· ─ · ·

as chris leaned back against the wall, his hands shoved into his baggy pants pockets, he was lost in the music playing through his wired earphones. it was just another day for him; hanging out near the skatepark, taking in the scene, and scrolling through random memes on his phone. he didn’t notice her at first, but the sound of her heels clicking on the pavement immediately made him glance up.

she was breathtaking.

the kind of girl you’d see on magazine covers or at glamorous parties, a total dream with the magnetic aura that pulled everyone’s eyes to her. her blue sundress flowed elegantly through the air, jewelry catching the afternoon light, and a flower clipped perfectly in her hair, giving her that signature floral touch.

as if in a dream, she looked directly at him, and their eyes met. for a second, chris thought he was mistaken. there was no way a girl like that would be interested in a guy like him—a goofy, clumsy skateboarder with a bucket hat and a pepsi addiction. but she smiled, her lips curving with a playful charm and to his utter disbelief, she winked.

chris’ heart stuttered. he blinked, utterly dumbfounded, as a blush crept up his cheeks. did she just…? he felt his stomach flip, his mind racing to process what just happened.

she held his gaze a moment longer, her smile widening as if amused by his reaction, and then turned to walk away, leaving a faint floral scent lingering in the air.

chris was frozen, his hand instinctively reaching for the silver chain hanging down his neck; a habit he’d picked up for no real reason other than it made him feel less nervous about things. but for once, he was anything but not nervous.

“she… she smiled and looked at me,” he muttered, still staring after her, hardly daring to believe his own words. “i was surprised to see that a woman like that was really into… me?”

he’d never felt this way before, and as the shock melted into a grin, he knew one thing for certain: he’d never forget the girl who made him feel like the only guy in the world, even if it was just for a moment.

· · ─ ·˚⊱𓇼˖°🪷° ִֶָ☾.⊰˚· ─ · ·

an; hehehehehe i'm giggling so much 🤭 loser!chris is so loser i love him bless y'all are not ready for them hehehe SEND ASKS ABOUT MY POOKIES Y'ALL also i'm posting dad!matt blurb like in an hour y'all are well fed heh<3 tell me why do i have the most amazingly amazing fanfic ideas in the middle of my exams😕

i'll be making a separate taglist for all my !readers trust i have so many ideas rn it's insane so let me know if you'd like to tagged for loser!chris and dreamgirl!reader :)

[transingthoseformers]

I just remembered the Megatron Gets turned into a Human by The Fae/Witches post and thought of this

Megatron, sitting on his throne in his new human form: …Starscream?

Starscream, not looking up from the datapad he’s scribbling notes on: my liege?

Megatron: I feel like I may end up regretting asking you this, but why haven’t you used my current predicament to usurp me? In this comparatively weaker form an assassination attempt would be easy.

Starscream, still not looking up: Lord Megatron, do you recall what my profession was before the rebellion?

Megatron: you were a scientist, if I remember correctly

Starscream: yes. One of my primary fields of study was Xenobiology.

Megatron: xeno…. Are you saying the reason you have not tried to kill me and usurp my position is because I am currently of more value to you as a research subject?!

Starscream, finally looking up: yes. I have been taking copious notes this entire time. I am learning about how an organic lifeform functions but from a cybertronian’s perspective. This study is invaluable.

Megatron: …I don’t know whether to be proud or uncomfortable, but at least you aren’t trying to kill me. Truth be told I’m surprised Shockwave isn’t doing the same thing.

Shockwave: I am. I am simply new to the field of Xenobiology. I never thought I’d be learning something from Starscream of all mechs.

Megatron: Ah.

Starscream, writing in his notes again: I am going to write a paper on this and send it to Skyfire. He’ll be absolutely seething with envy and have no choice but to suck it! Ha!

Megatron: and there’s the scheme.

HEHEHEHEH SO THERE IS A SCHRME BUT IT'S A SCIENTIST VS SCIENTIST SCHEME

Interesting

There's other opportunities here now that I think about suddenly a human!Megatron and xenobiologist!Starscream

Very fun situation and Starscream's right this is one hell of a research opportunity

Did Megatron need help to get up on his throne

[everettswritings]

Hi! I was wondering if you could do little!shadow milk cookie x cg!reader? Like imagine shadow milk cookie is regressed and being fussy and pouty, so reader decides to cheer him up my ticking him. Also you can choose what made him so fussy!

I absolutely can, that’s adorable! I’ve never really thought of little!Shadow Milk before, but that’s probably because all of the agere requests I’ve gotten of him are CG! requests. Is it just me, or do Little!Readers always get more fics? I’m not complaining, it’s just a pattern thing. (Kink/NSFW accounts DNI!)

“No, baby! You can keep playing later, right now it’s nap time.” You scolded lightly, trying to remove the toy from your little one’s grasp. He huffed and held it closer, pouting and puffing up his cheeks.

“No!” He shouted, kicking his feet at you when you tried to grab his toy again. You sighed, he was always so hard to deal with whenever he decided to throw a tantrum. You kneeled down to his level, “You’re getting tired and cranky, sweetheart. Come on, you’ll feel better after a nap. I’ll let you take Mr. Bunny with you.” You offered gently, trying to cool down the situation. He gave it some thought, then shook his head stubbornly “No, I don’t wanna take a nap!”. Honestly it wasn’t anything new for him to hate nap time, but today seemed like more of a struggle than usual. You couldn’t help but wonder if recent events had something to do with it. “Are you still pouting over that meanie that took your Soul Jam?” You asked, brushing some of his messy hair out of his face, and the big grumpy frown he gave you told you all you needed to know.

He wasn’t going to be letting it go anytime soon, was he? Frankly speaking, most people wouldn’t. You sighed, trying to think of some way to kill two birds with one stone: get his mind off said meanie, and tucker him out so he goes down for a nap. You then smiled to yourself, having the brilliant idea to fight fire with fire. You fully sat down beside him, crossing your legs out in front of you and propping yourself up casually.

“Alright, baby, you win. We can play a little more.” You said, already putting your plan into full motion. His face lit up “Okay!”, immediately accepting the offer he jumped into your lap, laughing as you let out a little “Oof!”. He really thought he won, didn’t he? Unlike what transpired a while ago. But now was not the time to dwell on that, the witches know bringing it up again would send you straight back to square one. No, no. Now was the time to take action and send his butt straight to bed! You chuckled and wrapped your arms around him, pulling him closer. “Comfy, sweetheart?” You asked, he nodded, “Good… because the tickle monster’s coming to get ya!” Without leaving any room to argue, you immediately started tickling his little tummy.

He immediately squealed and started giggling, kicking his legs again, “Nooo! Hehehehe! Hehehe! No tickle monster!” He protested. You knew he didn’t mean it, though. He always loved when the “tickle monster” came to get him. You leaned your head over and blew a raspberry on his neck, making him squeal with delight once more, “Hehehehehe! Hehehehe! Hehehe!” He couldn’t even say anything without thousands of giggles pouring out. You kissed his cheek, then started nomming on it like you were eating it, “Num num num! Ooh, I could just eat you up!”.

With each passing moment, the little one’s laughter was growing louder and louder. You didn’t stop, though. You kept tickling him, even as he wriggled and squirmed like a little jellyworm. Both of you knew he needed this, after all.

With one hand still on his tummy, you reached the other over and started pinching his knees, “Tickle tickle tickle! Tickle tickle tickle!” You grinned as he started kicking even more. However, you couldn’t help but notice that his giggles were getting softer and his eyes were growing heavy. Your plan was working flawlessly! You put your arm under his legs and scooped him up, carrying him while still tickling him- but the tickles were growing softer as well. You double-checked to make sure you had Mr. Bunny with you; after all, you promised you’d let him take the little toy to bed. When you were finally in his room, you set him down in the crib. It was white and it had a mobile of blue sheep and twinkling stars attached.

As much as he tried to fight it, he couldn’t stay awake longer. As soon as the little one’s head hit his soft pillow, his eyes instantly closed. You gave his tummy a couple more pokes, then set down his toy beside him and pulled his blue and white checkered quilt over him. You gave the mobile a little twirl, set a sippy full of water on the table close by, and kisses his forehead gently. “Sweet dreams, baby. I’ll be here when you get up.” You whispered. You then left the room, turning off the light as you went, and shut the door behind you.

The end.

Ahh! So cute!! Anywho, I hope you enjoyed. It does feel a little shorter than my normal fics and I do apologize for that.

[ruruvxz]

hello! new reader here. i think hanni would write romantic love songs!

“My Dearest Clementine”

Hanni Pham x fem!reader

↳ synopsis: You and your overachieving (ex)girlfriend broke up, but little did you know, she still hasn't gotten over her little clementine. And what's better than food to get into a woman's heart? A good serenade.

↳ cw: foul mouth reader, reader once again is lowkey so mean, breakup, established relationship, comfort, fluff

↳ word count: 2.1k

a/n: omg my first ever anon, im tweaking out, but i agree she definitely would make/cover love songs about reader. and she’d put her whole heart into the performances too… she’s such a cutie pie nfgagggghhhhhh fun fact this was originally a jihyo fic but then i thought really hard, and decided on not making it about her. oh and this is song is clementine by grant perez heheheheh

Skimming through the channels, you really couldn't help but be so agitated by everyone broadcasting this god-awful music show. "God, do these people only watch one thing, and why does it have to be music shows of all things?" You huffed to yourself, whilst aggressively mashing the poor remote. To be honest you'd be the first one to admit that you did enjoy all the award shows and music festivals. Hell, you've even been to your fair share, but do all these channels have to screen the same thing?

It's been the same MAMA award show on almost every channel, even networks that talked about important news, couldn't help but talk about it. Almost as if there wasn't anything else of importance to speak about, making your blood boil even more at the thought.

However, your visceral hatred for music programs wasn't always like this, well, not before at least. You used to adore watching the latest performances, always admiring the work put into performing on stage. It came to the point where you'd buy tickets for venues near your apartment. Despite not always recognizing everyone performing, you'd always sit through every performance, all the while waiting for that one special person to take the stage. Embarrassingly your true intentions were to go watch your then-girlfriend, Hanni, and cheer her on from the sidelines.

That was before, and now, the one who you called your one true love, had just recently shattered your heart into pieces because of work.

All the memories of her loving presence came back flooding into your mind, like how she'd escape practice using Minji's help just to find herself wrapped around your arms. Everything was just too much, the fact she would leave you to save face just enraged you further. "Argh! I am not about to reopen old wounds! Leave me alone you— minx!" You yelled at the screen, before throwing profanity after profanity, like some madwoman trying to stop the voices in her head. At this point, your neighbors were on the verge of sending a wellness check to the apartment.

Your rage was at a tipping point when you saw her gorgeous face popping up on the screen. You held up the remote, ready to shatter the poor television by projectile throwing the remote at the screen. It wasn't until your phone started vibrating erratically that snapped you out of your female rage. Holding your hand out and snatching the phone from the coffee table, you put the speaker to your ear.

"Yeah? Who is this?" You asked curiously, taking a mental note of how the caller's number looked eerily familiar, summing it up to being a coworker.

"Hey, I know we aren't close, but my friend needs a favor." The woman on the other side spoke with a soft and soothing voice, it sounded familiar, though the loud sounds of chanting made it hard to decipher who was on the other end. Thinking for a moment, you took your gaze out from the phone and to the television screen, biting your teeth as you saw New Jeans without Hanni nor Danielle. Sighing in relief you didn't have to see your stunningly aggravating ex-girlfriend.

Still reminiscing about all the times she's carefully and delicately peeled various fruits for you to eat without you even asking. You started to drift off thinking of ways to get her back, before snapping out of your pitiful daydreams, just to respond to the woman on the phone. "Uhm, not to sound round or anything, but who is this? I mean I'd love to do you a favor but—" You rightfully questioned, since this was just such a perplexing thing to ask someone, especially since you had no memory of them.

"Listen I’m…a friend of a friend...?" She spoke unsurely.

"Look, I'm really busy at the moment, I've got a maximum of 30 seconds before the next song starts..." The woman spoke, while you sat there still trying to puzzle together who she was. "It's just, my friend REALLY—" she exasperated the 'really' as much as her voice could. "Wants you to watch the MAMA performance today."

"What... I'm sorry, with all due respect, that's such an odd demand. I must emphasize that I don't know you, and you're not making the effort to state who you are." You commanded at the mic before the call closed, the woman on the other end not wanting to argue with you.

Before you could interrogate me further, the speakers connected to the television erupted loudly with my nose, the screams and praises abundantly clear. And of all the songs it could blast powerfully loud, it was "How Sweet" by NewJeans, but all that you could notice was Danielle throwing the phone to one of the staff before her muscle memory pushed through. (And that Hanni, who was previously sitting perfectly fine with the other members wasn't going to perform the song with them.)

As quickly as you comprehend the song was playing, you put down the volume to a bearable state. Admittedly you still felt a bit creeped out by that call, but then again compared to the phone calls and letters you received from crazed lovers, it wasn't the worst thing you've gotten.

Suddenly a sinister realization hit you, other than working, you didn't do much during your day off, only thing mildly interesting happening today on my day off was this fuck ass show. And if that caller's so-called "friend" wanted you to watch the performances, you'd do just that. So that's how you decided that you'd spend your precious time letting out your toxic rage on these performances in the comfort of your own home.

The time flew so quickly, and most if not all the artists were so enjoyable, but then, the performance you had dreaded the most was about to happen. However, a part of you was quite ecstatic to watch that dreadfully alluring woman fail miserably on stage. (But be honest, Hanni never does, she always looks perfect doing what she loves, not the mention how elegant she sounds when she sings.)

"God Hanni, even till this day you're insufferable. Fuck." You screeched, as the painfully beautiful memories of her flooded your brain, while all you could do was continue to shove chips into my mouth, eating them up with a bittersweet rage. But with your prior knowledge, before the performance started, the artists were given about a 10-minute break to get all the equipment and stage ready. So you were left with your heart racing inside your chest.

After a dreadful wait, you watched as the dim lights began to slowly light the stage with a warm spotlight, and the LED backboard displayed a beautiful orange orchard. It took you aback since Hanni’s most recent solo tracks never mentioned anything about flowers or fruits. You hated to admit that no matter what you still supported her career to the bitter end of your relationship, so every little detail about her was engraved into your mind. But oh hell, if it's a mess up, even better for you right?

"Ah, hello everybody. I hope you've been enjoying the performances today. Everyone is so good!—" Hanni spoke, the crowd roared at her words, and the camera flashed to her coworkers smiling proudly at her words.

"I understand everyone wants my more recent solo songs, but I wanted to showcase a new song. I made it about someone close to me." She continued, while even more mental anguish bubbled up inside your head by how she spoke so softly about the song, and how you assumed she moved on so quickly.

"I hope you all will enjoy this performance." That was the last thing she said before the backtrack began to play. It was a gentle stroke of a guitar before the other members of the band continued to play to the rhythm. The song continued as you leaned closer into the TV, using your remote to turn up the music playing from the speakers.

“Color it gray...” She sang, your heart thumping out of your chest, your mind drifting to the moments leading to your eventual fallout.

“Until I forget you

Like I never met you” The memory of her pleading you to forget about whatever connection you both shared because she didn’t want to drag your career down. Her tears still linger in your mind.

“My dearest, my dearest Clementine” She continued, looking back at the first time she ever spoke so dearly about you, using ‘Clementine’ as a term of endearment because you both cringed at the thought of calling each other ‘baby’ or anything of that sort.

“Color it gray

Until I forget you

Like I never met you”

“My dearest Clementine”

“Throw it away

But close enough to you” Her voice strained by her sorrow.

“Cause although I hate you

I will still fall in love, my Clementine”

“Every time, always”

“No matter how hard I try”

“My Clementine, every time”

You're always on my mind” She ended, fixing her gaze to the camera, looking longingly, as if she was looking at something— no someone through the screen.

You watched in disbelief as she closed up her performance, and walked off the stage, still wearing the matching dragonfruit and orange necklace you bought together. It was a few minutes sitting in utter bewilderment before getting a call on your cellphone. All you could do is weakly pick it up, while still being in complete shock at what you just watched, and without checking the contact you forced yourself to speak up, "Uh..." with a very long pause, you resumed "Hello."

"Clementine!" The voice on the other line spoke loudly, there was no other person who called me that sickening nickname other than the one and only Hanni Pham.

"I thought I blocked you!" You shouted defensively at your phone trying to get this woman to hang up.

"Yeah! But you never blocked Danielle since she never really messaged you, haha!"

"Just leave me alone you freak!" You argued loudly, "I'm hanging up on you Han—" Before you could press, block caller, you heard her scream from the other side.

"No wait!"

"You saw my performance right?"

"Uhm... I wouldn't say I didn't." You awkwardly admitted, still trying to avoid answering her questions.

You sat in awkward silence for a while before she spoke again, "Please, I know you— we weren't the most mature people, but please give me one more chance. I know I shouldn't be asking you on the phone…” You hear a faint sigh before Hanni carries on with her whole speech. “but I don't know any other way to contact you without you running in the opposite direction."

Rolling your eyes behind the phone, you took in a deep breath and analyzed the situation before making a very calm, calculated response. "No! Die in a ditch, Hanni! You dumped me! Then made a song with my nickname and aired it out to everyone!"

"No! No! No wait! Please! Clementine! That's the only way to get through to you! Please Y/N, I wouldn't be begging like this for anyone else."

"Ugh... fine! We'll talk about this later once you're done with work alright? Besides you shouldn't be stressed during award shows, it shows."

"Really?!" She questioned, a bit shocked that you would even give her the time of day.

"Yeah, whatever, don't overwork yourself."

"Thank you so much, I promise I won't, thanks for caring so much, even with everything I’ve done."

"Yeah yeah, you know my place, I'll cook something up, and bring you comfortable clothes, because I'm going to give you a piece of my mind."

"I should've expected that, don't worry, we'll talk, I promise, I’ll listen to whatever you have to say— and I promise I won’t make any more stupid decisions."

"Sure."

"I never break my promises clementine."

"Just— go back to work, Hanni! You're pissing me off, your sweet talk won't work on me this time, I'm gonna beat your ass no matter what."

"It was worth the try." She laughed before hanging up the phone, you swore you were gonna kill her when she came back home. But for now, you forced yourself off the couch and prepared everything for her arrival, after all, she never broke her promises.

[motorverseofficial]

Welcome to the Motorverse!

First things First, Let’s introduce you to our amazing mods! ^^

Mod Switch - Hey everyone! I’m so excited to be working on this project with my friends, and I look forward to answering your asks! :DD

Mod Coffee ☕ - Hi Hi!! Welcome to the blog!! Enjoy your stay (⁠｡⁠･⁠ω⁠･⁠｡⁠)⁠ﾉ⁠♡

Mod Glue - meowww, meowwww :3c

Mod Ben - HIIIIII HEHEHEHEH

Mod Italic - WOAHG HIIII HOW ARE THOUU

Mod Silly🌻- Hiihihihi im scared.

Mod Jhayke - Italic will get this reference. (I'm here for the Nightmare <3)

———————————————————————

Now with that of the way, let’s get into our Rules, shall we?

ASK STATUS: OPEN

-First of all, there will be no canon ships in this AU. You can ship whoever you’d like, just know what it won’t be canon.

-This blog blocks proshippers, comshippers, transphobes, homophobes, pedos, etc. it makes our mods uncomfortable, and we will not tolerate it.

-No NSFW or highly suggestive asks, this is to ensure that nobody gets uncomfortable with answering asks ^^

-Do not send Inbox spam. sending multiple asks is OK, just don’t send too many. We aren’t machines, and we can’t answer them all at once. Also consider sending in asks for one character at a time rather than the whole group!

- Please try to stay on topic. If it isnt related to the au, we probably wont answer it. Thank you [3

———————————————————————

refs under the cut!!

Killer by @toffeebrew (original post)

Cross by @switchthedragon (original post)

Horror by @xullian (original post)

Dust by @thatidiotutartist (original post)

Error by @iatetheglue (original post)

Nightmare by @justanidiotartist (original post)

Swap by @italic-doing-random-shit (original post)

[snail-day]

Hi pookie how are you! I have more brain worms for you hehehehehe soo think about this I know geto likes to infatilize darling but how far would he go? How far would he go to keep are so called innocence? And another thoughts eldritch geto presented with a sacrificial bride darling and then he’s like oh she’s so innocent! So I’m just gonna keep her instead of killing her! But have a nice day and if the ask make you unclmftable you can ignore it! Have a nice day/night pookie! Sending you platonic smoochies!

Anon-🧜‍♀️

Hiii 🧜‍♀️ Anon!! I’m doing great, thank you for blessing me with these brain worms😌✨ ohhh infantilization Geto? Eldritch Geto with a sacrificial bride? BABY MY BRAIN CAN ONLY TAKE SO MUCH YUMMY MATERIAL.

Let’s start with the first one, because we know Geto loves to coddle darling, loves to keep her all soft and sweet and pure. But how far would he go? Oh, so far. He’s the type to never let you lift a finger for yourself, he’ll spoon-feed you, bathe you, dress you in the softest, frilliest things that make you feel fragile, delicate, his. The only thing he won't do is diapers <3 because that's a little too freaky even for him. He loves how helpless you become under his care, how you start to believe you need him, how your independence slowly withers away under his suffocating affection. If you ever try to step outside those boundaries? If you start trying to act a little too grown-up for his liking? Oh, sweetheart. That simply won’t do. He’ll remind you exactly what you are, his precious little thing. Maybe with a gentle scolding, maybe with something a little harsher, he's not above tough love. Spanking does...kind of turn him on. unfortunately for you, he's not exactly gentle about it. Either way, you’ll always end up curled up in his lap, sucking on his fingers as he coos about how silly you are for thinking you could take care of yourself.

Now, Eldritch Geto with a sacrificial bride? Oh. Ohhh. You have me frothing at the mouth. Imagine, your village offers you up as a sacrifice, trembling and terrified as they lay you at the feet of something so incomprehensibly divine, so utterly inhuman. Tendrils of black mist coil around you, a voice that isn’t quite voice whispering in the back of your mind, pulling at the very essence of your being. You’re meant to be consumed, devoured like all the others before you. But then, he sees you. Really sees you. And you’re just so innocent, so fragile, so sweet. Suddenly, killing you feels like such a waste.

"Oh? They sent me something so precious?"

A clawed hand cups your cheek, talons grazing your soft skin, not enough to hurt, not yet, at least. His amusement rumbles through your bones, the world warping around you as his many violet eyes gleam with something new. Interest. Instead of sinking his fangs into your flesh, he keeps you. Plucks you from the altar and claims you, his eerie, eldritch presence curling around you. The village watches in horror as their supposed offering is spirited away, not into death, but into something far worse.

Because you aren’t just a sacrifice anymore.

You’re his bride, and you both have to figure out how your first night is going to work. There's a bit of a size difference

Sending you all the platonic smoochies right back, thanks for the feast <3

[norrisainz33]

golden || ls18

☆ summary: lance and his long term partner and actress, y/n, attend the golden globes

☆ pairing: lance stroll x actress!reader

☆ fc & warnings: zendaya & none

☆ a/n: shorter one bc i was inspired by zendaya and the big ring she was wearing last night hehe also lance has been moving me lately

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

ynuser has posted a story

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user1: tuning in for you only

user2: i can’t wait to see what you wear!!! you are going to shine like always

lance_stroll: my beautiful gorgeous girl

ynuser: my sweet precious boy

lance_stroll: hoping on the plane now! should be there in a few hours.

ynuser: wonderful! thank you for coming all the way out to la baby - i know things are busy for you these days

lance_stroll: you are always my first priority y/n/n and this is a big deal ❤️

ynuser: i am so lucky to call you mine lancey

lance_stroll: i’m the lucky one 😘

yourbff: i’m so excited for you my love

ynuser: and i’m so excited to see you soon 🫶🏻

user22: people died!!! (me i’m people)

chloestroll: yayyyy!!! you’re my favorite superstar!!

ynuser: chloe 🥹

user3: MOTHER!!!

lance_stroll has posted multiple stories

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user2: the prettiest princess to ever princess

user8: when i show up to a who loves y/n most contest and ur there 🙄

astonmartinf1: make sure you send us all the pictures possible. can’t have our man stepping out without posting about it 😮‍💨

lance_stroll: don’t worry admin - you’ll get them before anyone else does!

user87: just casually showing up with bouquets and dior… oh to be a wag 😭

ynuser: reunited and it feels so good ❤️

lance_stroll: nothing beats being with you darling 🤍

user12: happy for you (i’m single and jealous)!

chloestroll: give my girl a hug for me

lance_stroll: you got it 😘

user9: your commitment to be at every event of hers is truly the sweetest thing

ynuser has posted to their private story

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yourbff: girl call me wtf

yourbff: DONT LEAVE ME ON READ IK YOURE JUSY GETTING YOUR HAIR DONE RN YOU CAN CALL ME

ynuser: CALLING NOW CHILLLLL

yourbff: OMG BESTIE IM SCREAING AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS

ynuser: 😂😂😂😂 i can hear you all the way from la

yourbff: this is one of the best days of my life fr

ynuser: s a m e girl

estebanocon: mon ami what happened?

ynuser: lance will call you shortly my dear friend ❤️

lance_stroll: 🤭

ynuser: eeeeeeek i love you

lance_stroll: i love you to the moon and back

flavy.barla: cryptic? but also give your little puppy a kiss from me mon ange 😘

ynuser: are you and estie together? if so, expect a call sooooooonnn!!!! also puppy says they miss you

flavy.barla: omg yes we are together!

flavy.barla: y/n/n! i’m still crying im so excited for you two you have no idea

chloestroll: HEHEHEHEH

ynuser: sisssyyyyyyyyy

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user2: GORGEOUS????

user18: is it just me or are you showing off that ring in like a …… it’s more than just an accessory way

yourbff: how is it that everything looks perfect on you?

ynuser: stop ittttt 😭

flavy.barla: stunning, beautiful, perfect! not a single note

ynuser: thank you flavy 🫶🏻

f1gossip: now y/n/n…. is that what we think it is?

lance_stroll: genuinely speechless. how does one get so beautiful?

ynuser: lots and lots of makeup

lance_stroll: oh stop! its natural

user19: foaming at the mouth

madelyncline: begging you to style me. i wanna be like you when i grow up 😩

ynuser: your wish is my command 🙌🏻

user34: you never miss

user21: s2g that’s an engagement ring

mclarenf1: nice color dress 🤭

F1Gossip has made a post

liked by user1, user2, user3, user4, user5, user6, user7 and 12,643 others

f1gossip: actress, y/n y/l/n, attended the golden globes last tonight with long term partner and our very own, Lance Stroll, sporting a rather large diamond ring on her left hand. when asked by a reporter if the ring on her finger was an engagement ring, all she did was give a coy smile and a shrug before changing the subject. looks like wedding bells are ringing for one of our favorite duos!!

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user2: first of all - y/n is radiant. second of all - i’m so glad these 2 are end game i love them

user6: how lance bagged this baddie will forever be beyond me

user28: he’s a good man savannah

user12: happy for them (i’m crying my eyes out)

user44: a little commotion for the dress my god

user33: all i can think abt is how it’s papaya

user9: now that is a ROCK! making my partner take notes

user4: my shot is with y/n is now GONE

user22: what do i have to do to get myself a billionaire to give me the biggest ring i’ve ever seen in my whole life

user35: no fr asking for a friend

user11: no lance!!!! that’s MY girl!!!

user9: i’d put a ring on that too if i was him

lance_stroll has made a post

liked by astonmartinf1, ynuser, estabanocon, hugoboss, yourbff, fernandoalo_oficial, and 540,928 others

lance_stroll: had the best evening with the most beautiful girl to have ever graced a red carpet. thanks for having me goldenglobes and thanks to hugoboss for the magnificent suit.

view all comments

user18: we got a lance post before gta6

user22: missed him dearly

astonmartinf1: that’s our driver 🤩

user34: that old money hotness is real

fernandoalo_oficial: looking good!

ynuser: magnificent suit indeed 😍

lance_stroll: maybe i should wear them more often

ynuser: yes please 😩

user3: don’t think i didn’t notice the big ring on y/n’s hand. care to explain lance?

chloestroll: two of my most favorite people 🥹

user24: seething with jealousy

estebanocon: cleaned up real nice mon ami

lance_stroll: merci esteban 🤍

user28: i am down so catastrophically bad. i cant decide which one of you i want more

ynuser has made a post

liked by lance_stroll, landonorris, yourbff, sabrinacarpenter, astonmartinf1, glenpowell, and 980,285 others

ynuser: it’s all in the details

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landonorris: cool papaya dress

ynuser: it’s orange mate

landonorris: close enough! thanks for being a fan 🧡

user99: this is all but confirmation honestly

sabrinacarpenter: i think i might be in love with you

ynuser: well thank god the feelings are mutual 😭

user12: there’s not a single red carpet where you don’t devour

lance_stroll: you have one new really good detail

ynuser: i do yeah! someone special picked it out for me

lance_stroll: well they certainly did a good job

ynuser: the best job some might say!

mclarenf1: currently fangirling! don’t mind us

astonmartinf1: back!!! back i said!!! 🤺

user13: the squeal i just let out

flavy.barla: reject me so i can move on already 😭

ynuser: i have no interest in rejecting you!!! lets run away tg instead

estebanocon: only if lance and i can run away together without you then

flavy.barla: fine by me!

lance_stroll: wow 🙄

user88: my 2 favorite people just got engaged no one speak to me

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

a/n: thanks for reading!! likes and reblogs appreciated 🤍

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction

© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform

[delighteddistractions555]

LMK Incorrect Quotes 2#

The madness continues-

(Nezha is at an outside picnic bench with a platter of piping hot honey buns.)

Sun Wukong: Oooohhh!! Can I have one?!

Nezha: Frick off. These are mine.

Sun Wukong: Well ain’t someone being a greedy little brat-

Erlang Shen: Hiya buddy! Mind if I join you?

Nezha: Sure! We can split the platter. (Moves aside to let Erlang sit with him.) 

Sun Wukong: …..NOW HOLD ON A PIPING HOT MINUTE!!! HOW COME HE GETS HONEY BUNS BUT NOT ME?!?!

Nezha: You may be humanity’s hero, but you’re definitely not mine.

Erlang Shen: Eh, you can’t win 'em all sunshine~ (Chomps into a honey bun.) 

Sun Wukong: This isn’t fair!! No one ever shares their food with me!!!

MK: Oh! I’ll share my lunch with you Monkey King!! (Holds up a platter of delectable looking sandwiches.) 

Sun Wukong: Why thank you! At least SOMEONE cares unlike some stupid greedy gods I’m too gracious to name! 

Sun Wukong: *Takes a sandwich, bites into it, goes completely still, and faints within a minute.*

MK: O-o?!?!?!

Nezha: What the-

Erlang Shen: ……Kid. What exactly was in those sandwiches?!

MK: Uuuhhhh, pickles?….

Erlang Shen: Wukong is ALLERGIC to pickles!

MK: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! CALL THE AMBULANCE!!!! CALL 911!!!! CALL GUANYIN!!!

Nezha: Of all the things to almost kill the Great Sage, a damn overlooked food allergy takes the cake….

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Nezha: Hey, whatcha got there Erlang?

Erlang Shen: *Holding a cup of cheese tea in one hand and something else behind his back.* Cheese tea.

Nezha: The other thing behind your back duh!!

Erlang Shen: Gee squirt, can’t a guy have his secrets in peace?!

(MK arrives on his cloud, hops off it, and presents a steaming bag of noodles to Erlang.)

MK: Here’s your order Erlang!! I double-checked it was the right one!

Erlang Shen: Thanks MK, so who's your friend?

MK: What-

(MK turns around to check only for Erlang to swipe his staff, take out Li Jing’s pagoda, and smash it to smithereens.)

MK: *Beyond flabbergasted and faints.*

Nezha: …………WHAT THE FRICK YOUR ACTUALLY MY DAMN HERO ERLANG!!!!

(Nezha runs to the demigod to hug him.)

Erlang Shen: Happy Early Birthday Nezzie~

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Muzha: So Father is the Emperor now…

Nezha: Yay. Can I die now?

Muzha & Jinzha: NO.

Jinzha: I bet you anything, Father will marry us off to produce heirs to strengthen his hold on the throne.

Muzha: Brother! Whatever gave you that idea?! I’m celibate and I doubt the brat here will ever be mature enough for marriage. 

Nezha: Disregarding that last part, I agree with the bamboo pole on this. Father isn’t that crass or politically ambitious.

(Li Jing enters the room.)

Li Jing: Sons. There you are.

Muzha: Greetings Father! What is it that you need-

(Cue the Three Lotus Princes spotting the foreign goddess queen tailed by three princesses.)

The Three Lotus Princes: *Infernal screaming and they all ditch the palace in a trail of lotus petals.* 

Jinzha: I SO CALLED IT!!!

Nezha: SHUT UP AND RUN!!!!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sun Wukong: Hehehehehe!! I have the most perfect prank to pull on that three-eyed half-blood!

Macaque: Ooooohhh!! Whatcha planning oh Great Sage? 

Sun Wukong: I’m glad you asked my shadowy friend! So first I’m going to send a present to his house but make it look like it came from Nezha…

Macaque: Uh-huh.

Sun Wukong: The present will have a special pair of sunglasses to cover all three of his eyes. And I’ve placed a special enchantment on them…

Macaque: Go on. 

Sun Wukong: It prevents him from using his Third Eye properly so I’m going to shapeshift into Xiaotian and infiltrate his house….

Macaque: Hhhhhmm.

Sun Wukong: Use a sleeping bug on the real doggo and hide him in the closet so he can’t rat me out….

Macaque: Okay.

Sun Wukong: Pretend to be his precious pet until he’s asleep-

Macaque: Annnnnnnnd?

Sun Wukong: Then raid his alcohol shelf, steal all his weapons or treasures, and spray paint the house before I leave!! 

Macaque: Ooooohhhhh!! That’s a good prank! Except for one tiny detail…

Sun Wukong: Whatever could I have missed?

(Cue “Macaque” shape shifting to his true self, Erlang.)

Erlang Shen: You don’t tell the victim about your plan….

Wukong: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

(MK has hosted a party where he invited everyone he was friends with. Princess Iron Fan and Erlang are on the opposite sides of the party room. Once in a while casting a glance at each other.)

Erlang Shen: *In his mind.* Huh, it’s been a while since I’ve seen Gongzhu…

Princess Iron Fan: *In her mind.* Wow, it’s been literally ages since I’ve seen Jian…

Erlang Shen: *In his mind.* Guess she doesn’t look half-bad for a celestial traitor turned demon girlboss…

Princess Iron Fan: *In her mind.* Hhhmm, for someone who has suspiciously been missing out on a lot of the action these last few centuries. I guess he’s still nice and fit…

Erlang Shen: *In his mind.* Well, at least she finally stopped going onboard with her stupid husband’s ambitions for conquest.

Princess Iron Fan: *In her mind.* At least wolf boy has finally come out of hiding even well after all the shit that went down.

Erlang Shen: *In his mind.* Thank goodness she is starting to treat her only child right. But considering how bratty and demeaning she was in her youth, I shouldn’t have been surprised.

Princess Iron Fan: *In her mind.* I’m just soooooo glad that he hadn’t made any more big blunders like killing off his sister’s husband, burying said then sister he supposedly loved under a mountain, and attempting to stop her only son from RESCUING her!!

Erlang Shen: *In his mind.* Well at least I’m not married to a walking steak sandwich that decided trying to conquer a world of innocents and release THE damn crazy bone lady were the best ideas ever!!!

Princess Iron Fan: *In her mind.* Well at least I was actually ACTIVE for the last five hundred years instead of lying around like some lazy, good-for-nothing-mutt!!

Erlang Shen: *In his mind.* Active for what?! Trying to free a damn steak sandwich and leave your kid with Nezha to basically raise him?! What a fiiiiiiine way to waste your time Princess! 

Princess Iron Fan: *In her mind.* IT’S CALLED TRUE LOVE YOU FRICKING BACHELOR AND I ASSUME YOU BELIEVE THAT I CANNOT DAMN WELL READ YOUR THOUGHTS!!!

Erlang Shen: *In his mind.* Ooooohhh princess, I assure you, I know very damn well you can hear me.

Princess Iron Fan: *Unsheaths her signature fan.* BRING IT ON YOU DAMN HALF-MUTT!!!

Erlang Shen: *Takes out his three-tipped spear.* As you wish, your prissy highness!!

(The two immortal warriors engage in combat and Nezha realizes what’s going on.)

Nezha: NNNNNNNOOOO!!! STOP IT RIGHT THIS INSTANT!!! *Flies in to stop them from destroying the party.*

MK: WTF JUST HAPPENED?!?! THEY DIDN’T EVEN SAY ANYTHING TO EACH OTHER!!! 

Tang: Friendships turned enmity runs deep…*Slurps down some noodles.*

[cloneontheloose]

100 follower event has ended :)

[GOODBYE.]

... Hey.

Heya!! My second askblog lol, this one's mostly so I can get my daily brainrot for Forsaken

It's a parody account for one of 007n7's clones! Basically, what if one of his clones was created with more code than intended, broke containment, and became sentient??

Run by @grey-washere :33

Reference

[Heya!! This blog runs in tandem with @fauxfamiliarity, who's got a shapeshifter as their main focus instead of a clone.... heheheheh copies trying to find their own identity my beloved... CHECK THEM OUT!!!! HOLDING YOU AT GUNPOINT /silly]

~~~General Rules~~~

~ Cl00n7 will use he/they pronouns :D ~ He looks and acts slightly different from 007n7, which will be elaborated on as soon as I can get my hands on some digital art tools ~ Interaction?? Hell yeah! Use asks, blogs, I'm completely okay with roleplay- in fact I welcome it! :D

~ PING ME PING ME PING ME!!!!! SEND OVER THAT @ MENTION ME!!!! WANT AN INTERACTION????? PING ME!!! I'D GLADLY INTERACT!!! ~ I'm a minor so please don't be weird. ~ A lot of this is headcanoned, but most of my headcanons try to stick to canon as close as possible anyways, so go wild lol ~ I'll try to post art occasionally, no guarantees though

~ OOC will be in [brackets] :D

~~ Linkies ~~

Playlist

What mod looks like!! :D

~~~Uhhh Tags~~~

All ur base r belong to me (ask) Haxxing... (art) Wait wdym im on cooldown?? (OOC) where's my house (reblog) dude stop hacking kid (rp) is that me? (art from others) when the code so ass it sends you to another dimension -> interactions with other universes

Missing the friends that were never his --> Lore :3

~~Will update occasionally~~

[everettswritings]

Hi uhm!!

Could you possibly maybe hopefully pretty please write a tiny little fic with Cg Shadow Milk (or whoever, I’m very not picky if you’re maybe tired of writing him) with a Little Reader who is kinda bummed out so they like really quietly ask Shadow milk to tickle them?

AHH UHM, first request to you so if you dont wanna write this feel absolutely no obligation!! I don’t even know if you do tickles and agere in the same thing so-

Thank you so much!

No problem! After all, who could ever deny the sweet laughter of a little one? (Kink/NSFW accounts DNI!)

The little colorful loops of cereal swirled around in the bowl of milk as you stirred absentmindedly, making a whirlpool and watching as the little pieces were caught in the middle. You heard your papa tsk-ing at you as he came to sit down across from you.

He brushed some hair out of your face, tucking it gently behind your ear, “What’s with the face, precious?” He asked softly. In all honesty, you didn’t even notice how your feelings already made their way into your expression. Heck, you didn’t even know why you were down! Even with the sun shining and the birds singing outside, it felt like it was a dreary downpour.

“I dunno…” Was all you could mumble as you set the spoon down, letting it rest against the edge of the bowl, still watching as the whirlpool faded away and the cereal became still once more. Papa tilted his head with a concerned look on his face, he then placed the back of his hand on your forehead “You don’t have a fever.” He commented, pulling his hand away until you grabbed it and brought it back to you.

Even though you didn’t have a name or reason for the feeling, you still wished for it to go away, and you knew of one surefire way to make it go away. You grinned a tiny bit. Then, moving your chair to sit closer to him, you looked up at him with those sweet eyes of yours; “Tickles?” You asked bashfully.

Papa couldn’t hide the joy that lit up his face when you said that word, he immediately picked you up out of the chair and nuzzled his nose against yours. You giggled as he started talking in a funny voice, “Tickles? I dunno about that, little one! Tickles? Really? Oh, but how could I deny such a request?”. In an instant, you were in your playroom, laid down on the play-mat with your arms up. You started giggling even more before he laid a finger on you!

“Such a sweet baby! Sweet, sweet baby.” He cooed, lightly tickling your tummy, you couldn’t help yourself and started laughing outright. “Hehehehe! Hahaha! Papa!” You squeaked, wriggling as his fingers skittered all over you. He gave you a couple gentle pokes on your sides, asking: “Does that tickle, baby? Is that ticklish?” In a sing-song voice. You squealed, more giggles pouring out of your mouth “Hahahaha! Haha! Silly!” You called him. The tickling paused and papa gasped, “Silly?! Oh, my baby, you wound me!” He cried dramatically. Your smile got wider at his antics. He was so silly. “Yeah, silly!” You insisted, sending him falling onto his back and clutching his stomach as if he had been wounded.

You crawled up onto his chest, giggling at his act. “Oh, so you find this funny?” He asked, you nodded. His jaw dropped in overly exaggerated offense, he then picked you up once more and laid you on your back again. “You just earned yourself a thousand raspberries, baby!” He declared, his head immediately crashing down onto your tummy.

Pbbbt!

Pppbbbtt!

Ppbt!

They kept coming and coming like rainfall, or a barrage of arrows, all the while you were squealing and squirming. “HEHEHEHEHE! HEHEHE! HAHAHAHA! EHEHE!” You giggled and giggled as he continued ceaselessly. His attack didn’t stop for anything. Oh, your poor tummy was turning red!

Finally, Papa stopped completely, but not before leaving a couple butterfly kisses. He reeled you back into his arms as you caught your breath. “Is that better, baby?” He asked, stroking your hair gently, you nodded. “Good! Because if not, I would’ve gone after those little feet!” He gave your toes a couple pinches, earning a little squeal from you. “Papa!” You complained, he chuckled and kissed your forehead.

It was always so much fun when papa tickled you. It always chased away all the bad feelings in the world! He was a hero to you in that regard, and you were always thankful to have such a hero.

end of fic

Hey! Sorry if this is kinda short, but the weather in my area is pretty bad and that’s been screwing with my internet. SAT scores came back and I got a 1,040! It’s below my state’s average, and not really what the big fancy colleges look for, but I’m glad I survived and did as well as I did. I wanna thank y’all for the support, seriously, y’all are the best. I get so many asks from people telling me they adore my look, wishing me luck in school, and sending me their best wishes whenever I say I’m not feeling too well. Seriously, that’s so sweet! Thank you. I’m not even sure if I deserve it. Anywho, have a good one 🫶