#shhhhhh

[saltair-and-webweaves]

Who will come into my kitchen and be hungry for me?

you say you don’t want a boyfriend, but you know that’s not true - Charlotte Green/the voice - Anaïs Nin/the unabridged journals of Sylvia Plath - Sylvia Plath/tolerate it - Taylor Swift/the unabridged journals of sylvia plath - Sylvia Plath/the unexpurgated diary of anaïs nin - Anaïs Nin/ @treebloods/@lovebeing-a-girl/@ sanwtch on instagram/ @onlyanothermundane/@tullispink/I am an observer, but not by choice - @fatimaamerbilal/the prophecy - Taylor Swift/criss cross - Lynne Rae Perkins/Vladimir Mayakovsky in a letter to Lili Brik/what I could never confess without some bravado - Emily Palermo/little weirds - Jenny Slate

requested here

[idkaguyorsomething]

now that the big day is finally upon us, enjoy some complimentary memes alongside your ancient roman coffee and pastries as you wait in the senate

¡sic semper tyranis!

[tlkdraws]

She’s gotta make sure his Pokégod cosplay is perfect!!

[gigapigeon]

Portrait of Lady Cassia Orsellio, beloved of Rogue Trader von Valancius

[bootycallin]

since the oscar’s literally js happened i thought of something. cw: fingering (r! receiving), cunnilingus (r! receiving), swearing ig, a lil titty play. written w modern! vi in mind for obvious reasons. not proofread.

“vi… vi!”

you spoke between giggles as vi attacked your chest, kissing your tits, sucking on your nipples. you had jokingly said that if you two’s favorite actress won, you would make love. and, if she lost, you’d fuck. well, you’re in luck.

“terms of service,” she groaned, kissing your sternum, groaning softly. her palm is rubbing your cunt over your little shorts. she was more than a little eager, and stressed, as the awarding went on and on and that damned actress got nothing. she knew you were joking, but she was already horny and prepared the strap.

“vi—vi, she didn’t even get best actress!”

“don’t fucking care,” she grumbled, shutting you up with a kiss, hand slipping under your bottoms and rubbing at your clit. she had already seen you didn’t have panties on. every other minute of the celebration, you were looking sideways at her, teasing. she’s never watching any awards with you, ’cause this is hell.

she swallows your moan, two fingers slipping into your pussy with the ease. you’re so wet, so easy. how is she supposed to wait any longer?

“fuck, she won, right?” she asks, lowering herself till she was between your legs, already in the process of pulling your shorts down. “right?”

“she didn’t even—ah,” you gasp as her tongue licks right over your clit. “she didn’t even get up there y-yet…”

“but her movie won, right?” she didn’t give you time to answer, sucking strong on your clit, kissing and licking the puffy member like she was making out with your cunt. she might as well have been. her fingers are relentless, scissoring you open, until yet another finger fits in, curling up against that spongy spot deep inside you. she fingers and sucks on your cunt, your folds, licking a stripe up the slit. it’s practically worshipful, your pussy a temple for her. she’s drunk off the way you taste alone.

she notices your eyes are fixated on her, and stops just to say, “keep watchin’.”

“vi…”

you turned your head to the tv, shaky sighs and moans escaping you. how long did these speeches even last? she had been down there for five minutes tops and you were already building up to an orgasm. your neighbors would definitely be complaining.

“shit, vi—“ her fingers curled up just a little bit rougher. she practically growls as she sucks on your clit, rough, eyebrows knit together in concentration. it taken a few more thrusts of her fingers and suctions of her tongue before you’re cumming right on her face, to which she just removes her fingers and mouth from you. you whined at the sudden loss of stimulation, pulling a grin from her, as she just shoves her tongue into your hole, tasting your release.

“ah-shit, vi…!” you moaned, giggled all the same, head thrown back, one hand in her hair to keep her close. she doesn’t stop until your thighs close around her, nearly suffocating. she wrenches them apart with her hands, pulling away from your puffy, abused cunt—not before kissing your clit, tongue and all.

her lips crash against yours immediately. you can taste yourself on her. only parting to lick her fingers, she kisses you again, just to make sure you can taste all of her, all of you. one hand on your nape, yours tangled in her hair, moaning and groaning reverberating, until…

“she lost best actress,” you said, breathlessly, both looking at the tv simultaneously. she shrugged.

“it’s a win-win, then.”

𝄃𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄀𝄁𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄃 © bootycallin on tumblr. do not copy, translate or cross post without permission. ᛝ

[missallanious]

🥹

[clown-eating-pig]

Date night for Chester and Norris

(+shoutout to @moofter for drawing the design on the mug 😌)

[maukiki1]

steeljaw except i tweaked his design a bit because i fucking can

[socialbutterfly19]

I can and I will so I did

[dykes4putty]

orel's cooler family

[pequins]

WHICH ONE OF YOU FREAKS TOLD SCHLATT HE LOOKED HOT IN THE FIGHT ME VIDEO …

[anarqueeen]

On the internet no one knows you're in two separate chats domming and subbing at the same time :3

Unless they both see this post 3:

[luvrism777]

“you say you’re no good, but you’re good for me” describes so many of my ships

[erdbeermayo]

Kageyama Tobio in alien slippers for @inevitableinfinity for no reason whatsoever! 🤐

[drpepperwhoree]

can yall believe a mutual and i fucked last weekend

[fatratinatophat]

Can y’all watch them while I go buy Wonder Bread?