#skyfall reader insert

[strawwritesfic]

Asexual!Q x Female!Reader: Logical Fallacy [Ch. 21]

Summary: Q’s got one hundred and two problems. His girlfriend is, technically speaking, every single one.

Challenge:  “102 Things A Guy Should Know About Girls” challenge by Miss Chocobo on Lunaescence Archives.

Ratings/Warnings/Tags: T (foul language; sexual references; asexual!Q; sexual!reader; a running gag about sexual harassment; double standard: sexual harassment, female on male; sexual harassment played for comedy; James Bond & Reader friendship; civilian!reader; artist!reader; complicated family relationships; reader has a really big family; miscommunications; MI6 would not behave this way in reality; set post-Skyfall; joking references made to Bond/Q)

Pairings: Q/Female!Reader; James Bond/Eve Moneypenny

Tag List: @imaginesfire; @rory-cakes​

Master List

Rule #21: Size does matter–but only to hos, not to girls that want relationships.

If Q thought seeing Bond in various locations across London was stressful, it was nothing compared to seeing Bond in his own home. Even then, sitting at the table, Q could not help but feel immensely uncomfortable. Relatively large though the flat may have been, it still didn’t seem roomy enough to contain Bond, Q, and the latter's excitable girlfriend.

“There you go! Tea is up.” 

You flashed Bond a smile as you set one mug down in front of him, then Q. Bond smiled back, Q nodded, but you didn’t leave. Instead, you pulled out one of the kitchen chairs and settled in beside them.

“Mr. Bond, I know you’re here for super-secret work purposes and all–”

“Yes,” Q interjected. “He is.”

“–but could I ask you a question really quick?”

“[Name], now is really not the time. Mr. Bond needs to catch a flight to Beijing in the next five hours, and he really cannot afford to waste time with idle chitchat.”

“Oh, give the lady a break, Q.” Bond smirked at the look Q shot him over the top of his glasses. Really, it was bad enough that he had to invite Bond over to do this trade, and now Bond was purposely going to make Q look the bad guy. “I’m sure the professional matters can wait for a few minutes. Unless my ticket is going to blow up if I don’t leave quickly enough?”

Q answered with stony silence that you reacted to not at all.

Bond’s grin widened as he turned back to you. “Go ahead, [Name].”

For a moment, Q thought you might just do as he had asked and leave. You took a deep breath and closed your eyes. These actions were unfortunately not in preparation for exiting the room. They were instead preparation to ask the following question:

“Mr. Bond, how big is your penis?”

Tea spurted from Q’s mouth. Both you and Bond turned to give him quizzical looks as he continued to cough.

“[Name]!” he protested around his coughing fit. “Why would you–You just can’t–Why do you even–” Q could not finish his sentences.

You shrugged your shoulders in an almost offensively casual manner. “What? It’s not like I’m taking out a tape measure and asking him to whip it out on the table.”

Q’s cheeks grew as hot as the teapot sitting on the stove. Next to him, Bond’s shoulders silently shook, as if he were trying desperately not to laugh openly at Q’s predicament. When Q could not find it in himself to speak, Bond ran a finger around the lip of his mug and asked:

“Why the sudden interest?”

“Well.” You frowned at the table. “Q says everyone wants to sleep with you. I guess I was just curious if that had anything to do with it, because as far as I know, no one has offered to sleep with Q other than me. Maybe it's a size issue?”

Now Bond was definitely suppressing a smile. “How big is Q’s?”

“That’s none of your business!” Q burst out at last. Bond chuckled. You cocked your head to one side and blinked. “Can we please just get back to what we came here to do?”

“You didn’t come here to do anything. You live here.”

“You know what I mean!” Of course, it was unprofessional to snap, not to mention that Q probably wouldn’t hear the end of this particular embarrassment for a long time to come–from Bond or you. He sighed and tried to contain himself before speaking again. “[Name], please relocate to the living room. This does require the exchange of some confidential information.”

“But I didn’t get my answer,” you said, sticking your lower lip out.

Q glowered at you. Sometimes it seemed as if you got some sort of kick out of mortifying him. 

From the corner of his eye, Q saw Bond wink. “I’m afraid that’s confidential information as well, [Name].” 

Q turned his head slightly to stare at Bond. What was going on? Was he really trying to salvage the situation? Or was he about to speak some new terror into it?

Your eyes widened. “Really?”

Bond nodded gravely. “I might have to kill you if I told you. M would definitely find out about it, and then where would we be?”

“Dead,” you said breathlessly. “Or arrested.”

“That’s right. Now, why don’t you run along to the living room before Q here’s head explodes?”

“Okay!” You got to your feet, beaming, and headed toward the hallway. “You two have fun!”

Q waited until he heard the television turn on, then heaved a relieved sigh as Bond took a deep swig of tea.

“Thanks,” said Q.

“Don’t mention it.”

[billsbabydoll]

“𝓎ℴ𝓊𝓇 𝓁ℴ𝓋𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒶𝓇𝓂𝓈, 𝓀ℯℯ𝓅𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓂ℯ 𝒻𝓇ℴ𝓂 𝒽𝒶𝓇𝓂…”

contains:HORROR<3

summary:the notoriously “most feared” man in tokyo “tom kaulitz”, was my dear husband, though he learned to be sweet with me overtime, he still carried violent tendencies towards others. he hated the thought of other men having me in their disgusting minds, he was quick to blow those thoughts out...

WARNINGS:this is my own little spin on “my living nightmare” so if you didnt like that story then you definitely will NOT like this, (I DO NOT CONDONE ANYTHING THAT HAPPENS in this story, this story is ONLY for entertainment purposes!!!), violence, murder, gore, mentions of the mafia, jealousy.

notes:am i just completely fucked in the head that i actually prefer writing horror then writing the typical smut story-line?

HEAVY THEMES AHEAD!

being married to the one and only, the biggest mafia leader in all of toyko, “tom kaulitz” was no simple task..

the constant living in fear of, not knowing if he was coming home tonight, randomly having to switch locations when things got dangerous, not being able to trust a single soul, even having to change identities from time to time.

though tom managed to keep me far away from that cruel world, i still worried for his safety and even at times my own, i wondered if one day we could for once just blend in with society and finally be normal..whatever that meant.

but in reality we where here, in present day of-course.

toms hand in mine as we happily walked through the mall he had easily shut down just for the two of us, really it wasnt just the two of us.obviously his men accompanied us with their masks and machine guns.

“what about this one, is it too much?”i asked as i walked out of the dressing room, shyly strutting a gorgeous silk black dress.

“nein nein(no no)its perfect schatz(darling), you look stunning..”

“dont even take it off doll, im taking you straight to dinner after this.”he chuckled, mesmerized at the sight of the dresses tight fabric perfectly hugging my curves.

he looks away from me momentarily as he calls over the salesman,

“excuse me can you charge me for this dress please?-”

“yes of-course sir, shes smoking hot you sure shes just your girlfriend?”the overly-confident man snickered, tom immediately becomes furious at not only his comment but also for mistaking me as his girlfriend and not his wife, i mean does his dumb-ass not see the rock on my hand?

tom then stands up from the lounge couch, over looking the short salesman, choosing to ignore this for now and inserts his debit card on the card-reader, pulling it out once the reader chimed.i head over to his side, my pile of clothes in hand, tom quickly glances down giving me a cheeky smile before angrily looking back to the man.

“can my wife get a bag for her spare clothes?”he stared dead into his eyes, the mans eyes instantly widening at the mention of me indeed being his wife.

he frantically hands me a plastic bag, before rushing into the employees back-room, i confusedly look over to tom chuckling at the mans sudeen embarrassment.

“what was his deal?!”i giggled as i snaked my arm around toms, now making our way out of the clothing store, toms expression just cold and firm.

“hm who knows, dont worry about it-”he shakes his head smugly ideas already swirling in his middle, before leading me towards the parking garage, where his limousine awaited.

“lets get outta here prinzessin(princess)..”tom said as he opened up the limousines door open allowing me to settle inside first, following right behind along with his members.

he then orders the driver to one of my favorite restaurants, afterwards turning away from me to make a quick call, to then shut his phone closed once he finished talking to whoever he was speaking with.

i sit quietly playing with my other purchases as he begins chatting with his crew, a couple of them letting out a few murmurs and laughs back to him others remaining quiet, various minutes later we soon arrived to where we were set to dine.his security steps out of vehicle first making their way inside, then one of the men comes back out to send a hand signal to tom, letting him and i know that the coast was clear.

“i have a surprise for you waiting inside love, cmon!”tom cheerfully exclaimed, first he steps out of the vehicle, secondly turning around to reach for my hand, then gracefully pulling me out of the limousine, lastly leading me into the restaurants entry lobby.

the restaurant is empty to no surprise with only one anxious waitress and one single chef serving us tonight as per-usual, the waitress introduces herself then proceeds to lead us to our candle-lit table, taking our drink orders before scurrying away.

tom grins as he pulls my chair out for me allowing me take a seat first before pushing my seat back in place, doing the same for himself, then reaching his hand over the table for mine now gently rub circles on my skin with his thumb.

“you know i hate surprises baby..”i nervously stated, looking around trying to get any indication of what he had planned ahead.

“i think once you know why i got you this, i think youll quite like it, hes lucky i didnt do worse!”he viciously chuckled, letting go of my hand to signal one of his men to bring over a…sliver platter?

who is “he”?

what does tom mean?

whats under there?

what the fuck did he do this time?

“go onnn open ittt!”he cries out like an impatient child, he claps his hands excitedly together at the sliver platter set right in the middle of us.

i slowly bring my hand to lift up the cloche immediately met with the surprise inside-

the man,

from the store,

his blood seeping from his eyes and mouth,

a bullet hole through the side of his head,

and another underneath his jaw,

the words “fur meine frau (for my wife)” cut out from the skin of his forehead,

neatly arranged on the edge of the plate,

his head served on a sliver platter.

“surprise!!!”

THE END

[ladysouthpaw1213]

How I got into the Call of Duty Fandom thanks to Adler x Bell 🕶️🔔

(Header Image created using Kyoumeikaitou’s Neka C.C: Click)

As you all know, March 15 has a certain event associated with it. There is of course the backstabbing of Julius Caesar on this date. But Call of Duty fans(especially Black Ops fans) will recognized this date as the event of Call of Duty: Black Ops Cold War’s two endings(Final Countdown and Ashes to Ashes). Fitting considering that someone is getting betrayed in either of the two endings. And I decided that this is a perfect date to go into how I got into the Call of Duty Fandom and specifically how I got into the AdlerBell ship.

Before 2020, The closest I gotten to Call of Duty was watching a friend of my mom’s son and his friends play the original Black Ops(I don’t remember they ever manage to complete a mission. They either keep dying or someone kept accidentally hitting the turn off everything switch in his room when trying to turn on the lights). One day in 2020, I had notice that a favorite streamer of mine had did a stream on twitch for Cold War. Watching him played it, something about the game just drew me in to the point I was thinking about it after the stream was over. My mind soon connected that it was the dynamic between Adler and Bell that drew me in. Went on Tumblr and AO3 soon after for Fanart/Fanfiction of the two and I was hooked and I wanted more. So many amazing reader inserts where Reader is a Fill in for Bell(R.I.P to some of my favorites that got deleted over the years though. Skyfall I still miss you) as well as Bell OCs.

You may been wondering,”Why was it these two specifically that I latched on this paring?” If you ask me, I can give several answers. First being that Adler is Hot, sue me. But also that there is just so much possibles to explore in this ship for me. Maybe they were always doomed but maybe as well against all odds, they manage to work(not exactly the very model of a major modern stable relationship but still…) or maybe they kinda form a love hate relationship. Perhaps things would have been different between the two had they meet under different circumstances(Like if Bell had willing deflected in the first place). What if they were in different settings(like say a royal au)? Had they been together or reunited in 1984(Multiplayer), what would change and how would Bell react to Adler’s capture or would have they been able to rescue him at the mall where it all began? If they had kids, what would they been like? Would they had gone on the run together in 1991? Maybe one believes they are more alike than one thinks. And then there’s exploring the more darker aspects/implications of their relationship. What happens when you once view someone as disposable and a means to an ends becomes an obsession? What exactly is the relationship between puppetmaster and puppet? Did some of those so called false feelings did become real or were genuine in some form at the get go? Did Adler grew to or did care (in a sense) about Bell? So many questions that so many amazing Fanfiction/Fan artists have asked and answered about these two. And it’s always been fascinating to see what they conclusions they drew from what they interpreted 

It’s helped me break of my shell on Tumblr too, I used to be pretty shy about commenting and reblogging as well as making posts(I liked and maybe comment once in a while but that’s it). But this ship and the community helped me open up. I started talking to people that I once was scared to talk to because of my nervousness and shyness) You would not believe that my own posts used to be around 7-9 in total before I started to reblog and makes my own posts(whenever is aesthetic boards, fanfic idea rambles or just taking about My Bell). This ship and the community in general also helped me during a rough period in 2023 when my grandpa had passed away suddenly in November and my grandma spend December in the hospital. It in a basic sense, bring joy to me and thanks to everyone out there for such amazing stuff(if I named everyone, we would be here all year. Shippers, Nonshippers, you all rock). And I’m excited to see what comes of this ship or just Black Ops in general next in fanon.

💜💙🩵💜💙🩵💜💙🩵💜💙🩵💜💙🩵💜💙🩵💜💙🩵💜💙

(Likes, Comments and Reblogs are always appreciated)

[novaursa]

Hii! ☺️

I just started reading your Gwayne fic, and I just finished Skyfall. Can we just appreciate the depth it showed???

Reader showed characteristics which were slightly different from past chapters, but I think there were hints of the character development showing from the parts about the hunt. While in the past she was so in love with Gwayne without any qualms about showing him the full extent of her devotion, in the hunt she started hesitating, because she was no longer a little girl - she knew that she had duties, that Gwayne can just disappear (even if it's against his will) suddenly and she'll be left to Daemon toying with her and Viserys' own disregard and annoying hovering over her as if she's a little girl. Add that to Rhaenyra's withdrawal because of Alicent, she was probably all alone for a time.

I automatically also thought that, since she was with Rhaenyra at Dragonstone, then she must have been there even before Viserys died, so she had time to be close to her nephews. So, she most likely took the hit, too, when our baby Luke was killed. I assume this is what hardened her even more against the Greens, because in Skyfall at the beginning of her encounter with Gwayne, it almost felt like she forgot what it meant to love him and forgot how it felt like to be loved by him.

I love it so far, and I love that I still have a long way to go before finishing the chapters. Super excited to read the rest of the series.

I am glad you are enjoying the series. 🥰❤️

And you are correct in everything. In most of my works that depend on unspoke time jumps I mostly let the reader put the puzzle piece where it fits. I put a little crumb trails in each part to hint at something, but since this is reader insert immersion, the experience is unique to each reader.

Additionally, Skyfall was the first part that was posted (which is now a middle chapter) in the beginning. It turned later into an ongoing series from there, as it grew in popularity. I've worked around it, past and future.

Anyway, feel free to let me know your thoughts once more, when you finish the series. I am curious about your thoughts regarding the ending. ☺️

[skylarkking]

Since I write crappy reader inserts on Wattpad I always have "cannon names" for the characters the reader takes on.

Like this is Atlas (the "reader persona" I guess you could call it in my fanfic "Look my Way")

And Airachniss (he was originally going to be the reader in "Look my Way" buuut I thought I'd change it to be Atlas instead. Mostly because of how the other characters would canonically react to him. But hes my flirty spooder boi)

This guy is Solstice (he's part of the experimental fanfic called "Fallen Light" and I say experimental because I suck at writing Megatron)

Of course we have Teles ( from "The Lights We Burn")

And Galvus (a play on Galvatron. He was originally going to be the chatacter for "The Lights We Burn" but i scrapped it)

Prince Skyfall (I actually reference his "cannon" name in the fanfic as a separate character in "Royals and Renegades")

Another example is Shatterfang (from my fic "Predacon Logic")

One of my original fanfics had this guy as the reader (The Guardian and the Prime) and his name is Klick (yeah kinda dumb lmfao)

But then i have a bunch of scrapped characters that I use the names of as filler like Smackdown, Whirlwind, Shellshock, the combiner quadruplets Pulsar, Quasar, Magnetar, Blazar (they would combine to form Supernova), and so many others that I sort of gave form but never really did anything more.

Not sure if I'm just looney or ADHD ™

[sometimeslwish]

You chose: Sylus | Qin Che

Bond

Skyfall: All things End

#song playing; s:ate

— Wip - angst

Word count: 823

Tags: non-mc reader, angst, actor!Sylus, reader is an actress, singer and songwriter.

— Little scenes - angst

Word count: 684

Tags: angst, crying, mention of character death

Something Just Like This (With Sylus) - head canon

Word count: 1,388

Tags: voice acting, just general +18 content, Sylus being his usual daddy self, nothing too explicit, just mentions of fluff, smut and angst, Sylus becomes a scrip twriter and streamer (could you imagine that?)

Memoria

Santa (Saintess) - fluff, suggestive

[AO3 link]

Word count: 640

Tags: gn!reader, reader could be mc (depends on what you want to imagine), fluff, dancing, implied hispanic speaking reader, little bit domestic, suggestive.

Midnight City (slowed) - fluff

[AO3 link]

Word count: 364

Tags: mc/reader, gn!reader, fluff, nothing sad here, just a late night joyride.

Please Be Rude – angst | smut | fluff

[AO3 link]

Word count: 1,202

Tags: non-mc reader, gn!reader, hurt/comfort, childhood trauma, self harm tendencies that don't include cutting oneself because they are more subtle, mention of bruises, cuts and blood, implied abuse, rough sex, mentions of hair pulling and choking. Love is a double edged dagger.

Sweet - fluff

[AO3 link]

Word count: 630

Tags: gn!reader, mc/reader, could be non-mc or whatever you want, established relationship, painting date, laughing at your bad work, kissing, pet name (Sylus calls you beloved), little bit domestic, self insert turned into a reader blurb because I'm incapable of writing in first person.

Adore You - fluff

[AO3 link]

Word count: 1,707

Tags: gn!reader, foodie reader, could be mc or non-mc, established relationship, fluff, domestic bliss, grocery shopping with the one and only Mister Sylus, bit of an ADHD coded reader (I might have undiagnosed ADHD, but who knows) snacks, food, not for the ones with peanut allergies (sorry not sorry)

Sleeping Naked - smut

[AO3 link]

— (f!reader version)

Word count: 1,831

Pet names used: sweetheart, sweetie, sweet thing, baby, sweetness

Tags: afab!reader, established relationship, sleeping together (at first), bit of somnophilia at the beginning (consensual), Sylus toying with your pussy, waking up to sex, lazy morning sex, cuddle fucking, p in v, creampie (wrap it before you tap it)

— (m!reader version)

Word count: 1,848

Pet names used: sweetheart, sweetie, baby, sweet boy/thing/prince, sweetness

Tags: Sylus x amab!reader, established relationship, sleeping together (at first), bit of somnophilia at the beginning (consensual), Sylus toying with your cock, waking up to sex, lazy morning sex, anal fingering, butt sex, cuddle fucking, creampie (wrap it before you tap it)

Castle - idk, but you won't cry while reading it

[AO3 link]

Word count: 1,563

Tags: afab!reader, reader could be mc or non-mc, royal au, bunny hybrid!Sylus, patriarchy and misogyny, discrimination against hybrids, mention of assassins war and forced marriages, shitty family dynamics, suggestive near the end, open ended.

Myths

Second Child, Restless Child

[AO3 link] - #song playing; sc:rc

— Chapter 1 - angst?

Word count: 1,514

Tags: Mention of past lives, implied verbal abuse and misogyny (not in the main family and it's softened since it's intended as a children's storytime) childhood trauma, running away from home, woman playing man to survive.

— Chapter 2 - fluff?

Word count: 1,974

Tags: Mention of past lives, not canon compliant, assassination attempt turned into sparring, passing out from exhaustion, mention being hunted in the past, brief killing consideration. Idk man, it's 5 am as I try to tag this appropriately and I'm sleepy as hell.

[valkyrievega]

Have you read any Skyfall fics? If so, do you have any to recommend.

Honestly I've vaguely read a few but don't remember enough of them to really give a good recommendation apart from, you know, the two I've written XDD

You can find those on my ao3 or on my pinned post on my blog if you're interested, both just easy reader-inserts :)) made them mostly for a friend but we both thought they were worth sharing ! Thanks for asking honey xx

[thestalwartheart]

something a bit personal for the writer ask game... any or all of these: 5 / 8 / 17

Hey Merc! Thanks for getting personal with these incredible questions. They sent my brain into overdrive, which is why you're getting a series of mini essays 😅

5. What character that you’re writing do you most identify with?

The real answer to this is probably a character from an original bit of work, but since this is a fandom space I'll stick to fandom answers!

I always find this question tricky because I really identify with Bond around trauma and bad coping mechanisms and emotional repression. I'm also occasionally quite snarky and short-tempered lol. So it's not a positive thing. One of the reasons I love Skyfall so much is because seeing him hit rock bottom hits so close to home for me. For a long time, I was someone people were screaming at to get my life together. Watching that scene where he turns up at M's is like a kick in the tits.

But, really, I think based on the sheer number of things we have in common, the answer has to be Q. At least my Q. The cats, the tech job, the general exasperation at the state of things, the penchant for stripes, the calm in crisis mode followed by the awkwardness of simply existing. I love writing him, and I find it far easier to slip into his mindset for a whole fic than Bond's.

8. Is what you like to write the same as what you like to read?

For the most part, yes. I love reading and writing character-driven stories. That's about 70% of my reading experience.

However, there are things I read and love - certain tropes, for instance - that I will probably never write because I can't find a unique angle on it that makes it feel like my writing.

And I love writing poetry, but I have less patience for reading it, or at least searching out new poetry to read. It's like music - I find it really difficult to sit down and discover new stuff. I don't have that issue with prose.

17. Do you think readers perceive your work - or you - differently to you? What do you think would surprise your readers about your writing or your motivations?

Gosh, this is SUCH a good question.

My readers are lovely, probably more lovely than I deserve! I'm not sure if they perceive me at all. Maybe they do if they follow me on here (as many of you do - hi!). I think to know how different I am to their perceptions, I would have to know what those perceptions are. Feel free to tell me if you like!

As for my work, I think writing by nature is a very honest thing, even when it's portraying an experience completely foreign to the writer. I'd wager there's probably a lot more of me embedded in my writing than even I'm aware of. I don't mean that in a self-insert way, I mean it in a subconscious, foundational way. You would know this, Merc, but every choice you make as a writer has to be drawn from somewhere. I'm sure at least a few of those choices reflect on me as a person.

I'm not sure that answered your question, but the question itself sent me into such a spiral (a positive one, don't worry!) that I'm surprised I managed to write an answer at all lol.

If you made it to the end of this, please have some love -> 💖💖💖

[blackwatchladies]

Hello! Can I get some Gabriel Reyes angst with fem s/o? Perhaps where the reader dies on a mission that Gabriel wasn’t on? I understand if you don’t want to write it!

Hi! You can absolutely get some Gabriel Reyes! This fic took on a life of its own and turned out way longer than I thought it would, I hope you enjoy! It starts off with a little fluffy and then turns into one giant pool of angst.

- Mod Raven

Reader Insert MasterlistCharacter x Character Masterlist

 Skyfall

A pretty typical scene was playing out in the hanger. Agents were buzzing around getting ready for whatever mission awaited them that day, hanger staff were prepping the jets, and Gabe was trying to convince Y/N not to go on a mission without him; as per his custom whenever he couldn’t go with her.

“Gabe, honey, I’m going to be okay. We’re just attending the convention, getting some intel and I’ll be doing some translating. It doesn’t get much safer than that. I won’t even see any action.” She tells him giggling, stretching up on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come with you, Carino?” Inquired Gabe, pulling Y/N into a giant hug, “It would almost be like a mini vacation for us.”

Before Y/N got a chance to answer Jack cut in, “Absolutely not, Gabe you are not allowed to be anywhere near Italy right now. Besides I wouldn’t send her in if I didn’t think it was safe.”

“Don’t worry boss,” said McCree walking up to the trio, “I’ll keep an eye on her for you. We know how you worry.”

“See,” Y/N said keeping your arms wrapped around Gabe, “I’ll be perfectly safe, and I’ll be home in three days time. Just in time for our one-year anniversary. Jack wouldn’t dare risk Ana’s anger if I wasn’t here for whatever she has in mind.”

Gabe looked over at Jack and saw him vigorously nodding his head in agreement, “I suppose you’re right. I just worry about you when I’m not around to watch your back.” He presses a gentle kiss against her temple.

“I’ll see you in three days sweet cheeks,” wrapping her arms around his neck she pulled him for a passionate kiss, “I love you, Gabe.”

“I love you too Y/N” he watched as she boarded the jet. She turned around at the top and waved before the door closed. Turning to Jack he said, “I have a bad feeling about this one.”

“Don’t worry Gabe, it’s going to be okay,” he replied placing his hand on his shoulder, “She has Jesse and Moira watching her back.”

The two men stood there until the jet was no longer in sight, “Still something doesn’t feel right Jack, and it’s not just because I’m not going with her.” He could feel it in the pit of his stomach.

Jack looked at the other man, Gabe’s arms were crossed, and his lips were pressed together in a slight frown, “Come on, let’s go for a run. Some fresh air will help.”

Two Days Later

Gabe leaned back in his chair and stretched his arms up over his head. He just finished yet another report and he needed a break. “Maybe I’ll go for a run,” he thought to himself. With a quick look out the window, he saw the sun shining and decided that would be the perfect distraction. He has been a little antsier this past week since Y/N went out on that mission without him. Jesse was more than capable of keeping her safe. Plus, Moira was there along with Amandla, another agent he personally recruited. He just always felt better when he was able to go with her and watch her back. He knew he was being overly paranoid about Y/L being gone, but he just had this gut feeling he couldn’t shake. “A run is definitely needed,” he thought, grabbing his gym bag.

A knock sounded at his office door before Ana Amari appeared in his sightline, “Gabe, do you have a minute?” She asked tonelessly with barely concealed pity on her face.

“I was going to go out for a run, but for you, I can make a minute.” He laughed leaning back against the door frame, “What’s up?”

Ana stood there and pointed towards his chair, “Why don’t you have a seat, Gabe?” She watched his smile slip and brows pull together in confusion, but he took a seat anyways. She made herself comfortable in the other chair in front of his desk. “I don’t want to have to do this, she was perfect for him,” thought Ana taking a deep breath. “Gabe, there has been an accident in Italy.” She paused, a look of understanding dawned on Gabe’s face, quickly replaced with grief, and then anger.

“Is she okay?” His voice sounded hollow even to himself. He knew if Ana was here and telling him to sit that everything wasn’t okay, “What happened to her?”

This was the part Ana was dreading. “There was an explosion at the convention. We think the goal was to take out the President during his speech, Y/N was translating for him. She was too close to the blast. There was nothing anyone could do. By the time Jesse got there, she was gone. I’m so sorry Gabe.” She placed her hand on his leg and felt him tense under her touch.

The colour drained out of Gabe’s face, his head was racing, he didn’t know what to think, “She can’t be gone, she can’t be. I should’ve been there. I could’ve protected her, I could’ve…” he trailed off, his voice cracking, “I should have been there Ana. I should have protected her.” Unshed tears began to fell down his face.

“Don’t worry Gabe, we’ll get the bastards that did this, I promise,” she stood up, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder, “If you need anything, don’t hesitate to let me know.”

“Thanks, Ana, I will.” He gave her a sad smile and waited until she left his office. Flopping himself back into his desk chair he picked up one of the only photos on his desk. It was a picture of him and Y/N at the fair eating cotton candy with the Farris wheel in the background. They both looked truly happy and with that, the tears started to fall down his face.

                                                            ***

Amandla walked down the hallway towards Gabe’s office in a daze, her expression closed off. It felt weird to be back here without Y/N. “It should be Y/N giving this gift to Gabe, not me. I’m a poor substitute.” She thought to herself, pushing open the door to reception. Only to be greeted by Ana, “Captain.”

“I’m sorry, I knew you two were close.” Remarked Ana, carefully pulling her into a hug, “How is your arm?”

“It’ll heal,” she said thoughtfully, “All things considered, I think I got the better end of the deal.” Sadness clouded over her features while recognize dawned on Ana’s face.

“Gabe is in his office if you’re looking for him. Amandla, if you need anything just let me know okay?”

With a nod of her head, Amandla turned to face the door leading into Gabe’s office. Her good hand clenched into a fist at her side. She willed it to rise and knock on his door. She heard the muffled reply and took that as her invitation to enter. She owned her friend at least this much.

“Commander,” she greeted before making herself at home in one of the chairs in front of his desk, “How are you?”

He lifted his shoulders in a half shrug, “Been better.”  

Amandla was shocked to hear his voice sound so dead. She was expecting him to display some form of emotion, probably anger, grief, or sadness, however, she wasn’t expecting him to be so unemotional; it was unsettling. She looked down to the ground to compose herself. “She wanted you to have this Gabe. I shared a hotel room with Y/N on this mission and she bought this on our first day there.” She set the bag down on the table, “I’m sorry Gabe. I really am.”

“Your arm, what happen to it?” He may have been looking at you, but his eyes were a million miles away, swimming in a sea of emotions.

“It’s broken, the force of the explosion knocked me back.” She paused as she took in the sight of his eyebrows snapping together, “When I heard the mechanical whirl sound, I ran towards the stage trying to grab Y/N and pull her off the stage. But I was too late. The next thing I remember is waking up on the plane and McCree informing me of what happened. I’m sorry I couldn’t save her Gabe.”

Gabe could see the tears forming in her eyes, “It’s okay Amandla. You did everything you could, thank you for trying.” He told her, hoping his voice at least sounded somewhat appreciative.

Once she left the office Gabe opened the bag and pulled out a bottle of Scottish whiskey. A piece of paper fell to the floor and he noticed her elegant writing on it. He warily picked up the note and examined it.

Gabe, I hope you enjoy this as much as I think you will. I love you! <3

For the second time that day Gabe sobbed in his office.

                                                              ***

Jesse paced circles outside of Gabe’s office door. He had just gotten back from that godforsaken mission a few hours ago. After debriefing and a quick visit to medical he made his way to the commander’s office with every intention of going in to talk to him, however, he couldn’t bring himself to knock on the door. He didn’t know what to do or what to say.

Ana looked up from her paperwork and saw the cowboy still pacing outside of Gabe’s door and decided to go speak to him, “Jesse, just go talk to him. It wasn’t your fault, you couldn’t have done anything. He’s your friend, he needs you right now.”

With a sigh, he admitted she was right. Knocking on the door he waited until he heard Gabe call out inviting him inside. Once inside he looked around, if he didn’t know better he’d assume it was just another day, with the exception of the half empty bottle of whiskey on his desk. “Gabe…”

“Don’t,” he snarled, “Whatever you’re going to say Jesse just don’t.”

McCree drew his bottom lip in between his teeth, thinking about his options. Once he settled on a course of action he walked over to Gabe, “Hold out your hand” he said softly.

Gabe unclenched his fist and held his hand out to McCree, “I thought you might want to have this.” When Gabe looked down to see what was in his hand he drew in a sharp breath and fell back into his chair, his legs suddenly weak. In his hand rested a silver necklace with elephant pendant.

“I got her this on an undercover mission, she said it fit her because she never forgot anything,” he gave a mirthless laugh at that, “I thought it was cute because the eye was emerald that matched the striking green colour of her eyes. You should’ve seen her face when I pulled out my wallet to buy it for it. That was the first moment I knew she was who I wanted to spend my life with. That she was the one I couldn’t live without.”

“Gabe,” the cowboy started, reaching his hand out towards him before thinking better of it, “I’m sorry I couldn’t keep her safe.” He finished in a defeated tone of voice.

Gabe chuckled darkly, “It was my job to keep her safe, not your job. I should have been there. I should’ve fought harder to be there. Damn the rules to hell.”

Gabe stood and poured them each a generous measure of whiskey, handing a glass to McCree, “To Y/N,” He offered, raising his glass into the air, “She was the best out of all of us.” He finished, bottom lip trembling.

“To Y/N.” Echoed McCree raising his glass to meet Gabe’s before downing his drink.

                                                          ***

It was two days before the funeral when a knock rang out through the apartment. When the door whooshed open Jack’s, eyebrows raised in surprise. He wasn’t expecting Gabe to look like a million dollars, but he didn’t expect him to look this bad either. His skin looked ashen, his eyes glistened with unshed tears, and his usually clean-shaven face was sporting the beginnings of a beard.

“Angela sent me over with supper and some of her famous chocolate chip cookies.” He said pushing his way past Gabe and into his kitchen, “She made taco salad. Best to eat it while it’s still fresh. Why don’t you sit down on the couch and I’ll bring it over?” Jack didn’t wait for any sign of confirmation before getting to work. He had helped Y/N many times do the dishes after she hosted a supper, he knew where everything was. His heart constricted when he thought of her and then of his friend suffering on the other side of the room. With the two plates, he sat down on the couch beside Gabe.

“I got us each a beer,” Gabe said gruffly, clearing his throat. “Thank you, and please tell your wife I really appreciate her keeping me in food this past little bit. Between her bringing me food, Emily keeping my fridge stocked, and Reinhart keeping me in German beer, I’ll never go hungry again.” A smile appeared on his face, but it didn’t reach his eyes. Jack knew it was forced.

The pair sat in silence, sharing a meal and drinking beer together. Once the dishes were done and put away Gabe turned to Jack, “Why wouldn’t you let me go with her?” He screamed, the words ripping out of his chest.

“Gabe…” started Jack at a loss for words, “My hands were tied, if I could have let you go with her I would’ve. You know after what happened during Retribution you aren’t allowed back in Italy right now.”

“Bullshit,” spat Gabe, his lips drawn back in a snarl, “I call bullshit. McCree and Moira got to go. I could’ve kept her save.”

“I know they did, and I know it seems unfair but unlike you, they aren’t such public figure and not as easily recognizable as you are.”

“I should have been there, I should have saved her. It should’ve been me and not her.” Gabe slammed his fist on the table for emphasis, his voice increasing in volume with each word. The tension in the room was thick but the next words from Gabe’s mouth shattered that in a matter of sections, “I let her down Jack. I failed her.”

Jack had never seen his friend so broken before. Sadness clouded his features as tears began to fall. Not knowing what else to do, Jack wrapped his arms around him and pulled into a hug. Gabe’s whole body shook as he released everything he has been holding on to since it happened.

Somewhere in the back of Gabe’s mind, he knew he’d have to apologize for everything he said to Jack. But for now, he let himself be comforted by his friend.

                                                           ***

A few days later the majority of Blackwatch and Overwatch’s members arrived at their Switzerland base, only for a greatly different purpose than what they had originally planned on. Instead of arriving for an anniversary party for Blackwatch’s commander, they were here for a funeral of a fallen friend. One who happened to be the commander’s partner, killed in the line of duty. That alone would be enough to draw a crowd, in addition to the fact that Y/N was well liked, everyone wanted to pay their respects to their fallen friend. The mood was sombre as they made their way into the on-base chapel. There wasn’t an empty seat to be had, save for the front row, which was reserve red for he closest friends.  

In a room off to the side of the chapel Jesse paced around the room, it was almost time to start and Gabe hasn’t been seen since the wake yesterday. It was a private event, reserved for those closest to her. Suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulder, it was Ana “He’ll be here Jesse, this isn’t easy for him. For any of us.”

“I know, I just wish he would let us help more. I’m worried about him.”

“Me too Jesse, me too,” she said pensively, “We have to give him space and be there for him when he is ready for our help.”

Just than Gabe walked into the room, only looking slightly worse for wear. His hair was combed, but he had dark circles under his red and somewhat swollen eyes. It was obvious he had been crying, no one in the room felt the need to mention it. They couldn’t imagine what he was going through.

“Sorry I’m late everyone,” he said looking at the floor, he couldn’t face their pity filled eyes again.

He looked up when he felt a hand rest on his shoulder, “Gabe…”

“I know Jack,” replied Gabe giving his head a slight nod to acknowledge Jack’s unspoken words of support, “I know.” His eyes followed Jack as he moved to go stand by Angela. Taking a deep breath, he let his eyes roam around the room. Fareeha stood next to Jesse, Lena and Emily were talking to Ana and Reinhard.

The chaplain poked his head in the door, “It’s time.”

A hush fell over the room as everyone moved to get in a line behind Gabe with Tracer at the end. They made their way into the chapel single file and occupied the seats saved for them in the front row. The ceremony moved by in a blur to Gabe until the chaplain motioned to him to come forward and deliver the eulogy. It was only when Ana gently nudged him in the side he realized what had to be done.

With an outward calm, he didn’t really feel he made his way up to the podium. He let his eyes roam over the crowd and landed on some familiar faces. Angela’s hand was on Jack’s legs in a comforting way; a package of tissues sat on her own lap. Jesse was gripping Fareeha’s hand so hard his knuckles were white, Gabe knew that the young man still felt guilty he couldn’t save her. Next, his eyes landed on Amandla, her lower lip was drawn between her teeth in an effort to remain in control of her emotions. Beside her sat Tracer, drawing support from the older women beside her. Emily stood over by the door, she took it upon herself to help prepare the refreshments for after the funeral. She had been close to Y/N and wanted to help in some way. Moira sat there, her face devoid of emotions. Finally, his eyes landed on Ana. She caught his eyes and gave him and an encouraging smile.

He gripped the podium with shaky hands, drawing a breath he looked at the mostly scratched out notes in front of him. “In the whole two and half years that I have known Y/N she has done nothing but make my life better. For example, I know most of you think that nice green plant on my desk is a new one to replace the old one. Only the truth is Y/N nursed that mostly dead ivy back to life. If I let that thing die I have no doubt in my mind she will come back, just to smack me upside the head if nothing else.”

He paused while laughter ran out from the crowd, “I know a lot of you have interacted with Y/N personally or know of someone who has. She was the sweetest, caring, and kind individual I’ve ever known. She would bake cookies and leave them in the break rooms, she would always be willing to help someone out, and would always be there if you needed a friend. But if you crossed her there was no safe place in the world or you. I would know since I was frequently the target of her ire.” He chuckled darkly.

Gabe looked over to the casket, the flag of the Y/N’s country draped on top, then back out to the crowd, “I know Y/N meant a lot to you, but you all meant a lot to her. Ana and Angela, she looked at you both like the mothers she never had. Jesse, she thought of you as her older brother. Amandla, you were her best friend and like a sister to her. Tracer and Emily, you guys were also like her sisters and she loved competing with you guys in everyone from. Fareeha you were the crazy cousin, you two were thick as thieves and always getting into to trouble. Moira she didn’t know you well but wanted to learn more about you. Last but certainly not least, Jack and Reinhart, she thought of you like her fathers. She was always scared that she would let you two down somehow. She never had a family of her own but made one for herself when she joined up and all our lives are better for knowing her. I know mine certainly was.”

Ana passed him a tissue as Gabe took his place beside her. The rest of the memorial passed by for Gabe much like the first half did, in a blur. The next thing he knew it was time to carry the casket out. Gabe had received special permission to have Y/N buried under her favourite tree. Gabe moved to the front right of the casket, Jack the front left, Ana the back right, and Jesse on the back left. As they made their way out of the room the processional party followed behind them. Everyone else stayed seated and watched a live feed on the TV.

The pallbearers set the casket down on a stand and stood off to the side while the rest of the party filled in around the grave. Jack, Ana, Jesse, and Angela folded up the flag and handed it to Jack. He turned to stand in front of Gabe, “She will always be remembered and part of our family.” He said before presenting the flag.

Gabe took the flag, “Thank you, Jack,” he turns to everyone, “Thank you all for everything you have done for me.”

One by one the party tossed a simple red rose into her grave before making their way back to the chapel. Where the mingled with fellow agents and shared their favourite stories and memories of Y/N.

One Year Later

Gabe stood in front of her tombstone and he was at a loss for what to say. “It’s been a year, I miss you more than anything Y/N. It’s the kind of day you’d love, it is nice and sunny with just enough of a breeze to fly a kite. I know you’d drag me out here away from my paperwork and I’d pretend grumble about it, but we both know I’d love it. Not much has changed here, we’re all still healing. Ana and Angela have taken it upon themselves to host a family meal every Sunday for those of us who are around. Fareeha and Jesse got married and are expecting a baby, if it’s a girl they plan on naming her after you. They’ve asked me to be the godfather. Tracer and Emily are still working at keeping the fridge stocked. I’ll come back from missions and just find it filled with homemade meals. Reinhart is still as loud and cheerful as ever and still brings me German beer. Amandla got herself a girlfriend, she’s really nice too, you’d have liked her. Jack is still as solid as ever. He’s always there when the days are bad. So, don’t worry about me Carino, I’m in good hands here.”

He set the bouquet of red roses down in front of her tombstone and turned around, surprise gracing his features, “How long have you been there for?”

“Not long,” replied Ana, “We waited until you were finished before we came over.”

“The bench was a nice touch, Gabe,” said Jack before reading the plaque, “In loving memory of Y/N. May you continue to be a ray of sunshine.”

“It seemed fitting,” a flush crept up Gabe’s neck, “She was a ray of sunshine.”

Ana made her way in between the two men and wrapped her arms around their waist, “We should get going, Angela won’t be happy if we’re late and the food goes cold.”

The trio made their way back to the apartment shared by Jack and Angela in comfortable silence. Each reflecting on the various changes the year brought and wishing that a certain someone would be here to see everything that has been, and has yet to be, accomplished.

 - Mod Raven

[strawwritesfic]

Asexual!Q x Female!Reader: Logical Fallacy [Ch. 20]

Summary: Q’s got one hundred and two problems. His girlfriend is, technically speaking, every single one.

Challenge:  “102 Things A Guy Should Know About Girls” challenge by Miss Chocobo on Lunaescence Archives.

Ratings/Warnings/Tags: T (foul language; sexual references; asexual!Q; sexual!reader; a running gag about sexual harassment; double standard: sexual harassment, female on male; sexual harassment played for comedy; James Bond & Reader friendship; civilian!reader; artist!reader; complicated family relationships; reader has a really big family; miscommunications; MI6 would not behave this way in reality; set post-Skyfall; joking references made to Bond/Q)

Pairings: Q/Female!Reader; James Bond/Eve Moneypenny

Tag List: @imaginesfire; @rory-cakes​

Master List

Rule #20: Saying something sweet might get you off the hook, but doing something sweet will always get you off the hook.

Q could hear the television the moment he walked through the front the door that night. It wasn't on loud enough that he could understand what people were saying, or, indeed, if anyone was talking at all, but he could tell that it was on. That meant that you were home, or at least he assumed as much. You’d long since abandoned the habit of leaving things on when you left the flat.

He was not entirely sure if your presence was a good sign. His hand gripped the small bouquet of flowers he’d bought on the way home as he shut the door behind him.

“[Name],” he called into the oddly still home. “[Name], are you here?”

You didn’t answer. 

His pulse quickened a bit. More likely than not, you simply weren’t talking to him. He couldn’t blame you. But the silence did not necessarily mean that you had left entirely.

“[Name],” Q said again, trying to keep his voice light. 

If you were still spooked, he didn’t want to make things worse. As his worry grew, he wandered down the hall, following the sound of the television until he reached the living room. He peeked inside reluctantly, then felt the tightness in his chest dissipate at once.

You were there, sitting cross-legged on the floor with a bowl of popcorn in your lap. Your eyes looked a little glassy, but otherwise you seemed much healthier than Q had seen you in days. Your was damp, still dripping slightly onto the collar of the faded t-shirt you wore for pajamas. He practically collapsed against the door frame in relief.

“Eh?” With a handful of popcorn almost to your mouth, you stopped, blinked, and looked in his direction. Oh, sure. That you noticed. Not him shouting frantically for you a few minutes ago. “Alton!”

Q could only stare as you sat up a little straighter and beamed at the sight of him. He wasn’t sure what he had been expecting upon coming home, but it certainly wasn’t this enthusiastic greeting. When you’d been let out of M’s office that afternoon, you’d only given Q a tremulous goodbye before sprinting for the exit. Now, everything seemed fine. He gazed steadily at you for a long minute; all you did was gaze back while shoving fistfuls of popcorn into your mouth.

“[Name],” he said hesitantly and very seriously. “Are you all right?”

“I’m great!”

“No, I mean…after all of that.”

You blinked again, then cocked your head and smiled a very rare kind of smile for you–one that told Q that you understood something that he, as of that moment, did not. He walked a little farther into the room before you spoke:

“I’m fine. Look, Alton, I’m really sorry you had to see –”

“No, I’m sorry you had to go through that.”

An impatient hand waved in the air above your head. “You were just trying to protect me. Mr. Bond, too. I really am sorry for breaking down like that. I just…” You trailed away and allowed your eyes to do so as well. When you looked back at Q a second later, you did so with a shrug. “Went a little stir crazy. You know I don’t like to be alone, and there was nothing to do. I just sat there all day, worrying about you. And I couldn’t contact anyone…”

Silence fell. You chewed on your lip as you glanced about the living room. What were you looking for? A place to hide? 

Q stood above you with guilt gnawing at his chest. He took a deep breath; apologizing had never been one of his strengths, but he knew he needed to do it now.

“[Name], I am so sorry.”

You lifted your eyebrows, but didn’t comment on the unusual situation. After a moment, you frowned and tugged on one of his pants' legs, as it was the only thing you could reach. “Alton, quit apologizing. You told me things might get like this when you took the MI6 job. I was the one that chose to stay, okay?”

“And are you still going to?”

“Of course I am, Alton.” When Q looked at you questioningly, you grinned. “Come on. How are you supposed to survive without me? You don’t even know how to work an oven properly.”

“Yes, I do!”

You rolled your eyes, but the smile remained. “Just teasing. I love you, Alton. I’m not going to leave just because of that. It wasn’t too bad. Everyone was really nice to me.”

“Even M?”

“Yeah, your boss was totally cool. Although he did tell me not to video call you at work anymore.”

“Probably a good idea.”

This time, the silence was gentler. You smiled soppily up at Q, and he could feel a tiny smile on his own face as well. Then he remembered the flowers.

“Oh!” He practically threw the bouquet at you. “I got you these. To say I’m sorry. I thought you might like them. But maybe you don’t? I couldn’t remember what you said about flowers. You can just toss them out. I mean, if you want to.”

Q could feel his ears turning red. He was babbling. How embarrassing.

You, however, only smiled again as you took the flowers from him. “Thanks, Alton. But you didn’t have to do that.”

“I wanted to,” he insisted. “I…love you, too.”

Your eyes went wide. Q couldn’t fathom why, though. Surely he’d said that before? But you didn’t leave him long to ponder. You patted the wood floor beside you and gestured toward the television.

“Take a seat, Alton. Just for a little while. Then you should definitely get some sleep.”

“Probably,” said Q. But he settled down next to you anyway, and let his head fall on your shoulder.

[strawwritesfic]

Asexual!Q x Female!Reader: Logical Fallacy [Ch. 19]

Summary: Q’s got one hundred and two problems. His girlfriend is, technically speaking, every single one.

Challenge:  “102 Things A Guy Should Know About Girls” challenge by Miss Chocobo on Lunaescence Archives.

Ratings/Warnings/Tags: T (foul language; sexual references; asexual!Q; sexual!reader; a running gag about sexual harassment; double standard: sexual harassment, female on male; sexual harassment played for comedy; James Bond & Reader friendship; civilian!reader; artist!reader; complicated family relationships; reader has a really big family; miscommunications; MI6 would not behave this way in reality; set post-Skyfall; joking references made to Bond/Q)

Pairings: Q/Female!Reader; James Bond/Eve Moneypenny

Tag List: @imaginesfire; @rory-cakes​

Master List

Rule #19: Remember: Girls are pretty, but yours is the prettiest!

Two days later, Bond killed the cause of the security breach, and you were released. Not without any sort of ado, of course; MI6 wanted a full debriefing. That wasn't even getting into your not-so-little breakdown, which in M’s opinion warranted a complete psychological exam before he could feel safe in releasing you into the general public. Needless to say, this hadn’t exactly put you in the best state of confidence for your first meeting with head of the entire program.

Q couldn’t help much with that. All he could do was walk you to M’s office door, then give your hand a gentle squeeze as you walked inside. He could feel your pulse pounding as he did so, but he couldn’t even offer you a smile before the door snapped shut and the light above it flashed on.

“You’ll be fine,” he muttered to no one. 

Even Miss Moneypenny was away at the moment. Q was left all alone, with nothing but the painting behind her desk to distract him from his nerves. In a fit of anxiousness, he paced over to the corner water cooler and poured himself a cup. It wasn't tea, but in this case it would have to do.

“Knock knock.”

Q very nearly jumped out of his skin. Given the impossibility of such a situation, though, he only managed to spill water down his front. Of course, there was Bond, sidling into the room, looking bruised but cocky–and, as usual, pleased to be present to see Q embarrass himself.

“007,” Q spluttered as he attempted in vain to dry himself off with nothing but the bottom of his jumper. “What are you doing back already?”

“I caught an early flight back into London,” Bond answered. He placed his hands in his pockets and nodded his head once toward M’s door. “Is [Name] in there? Eve said she wasn’t looking too well earlier.”

The water wasn’t coming out. Q dropped his jumper and gave a shaky nod, his own eyes too jittery to focus for long on any one thing inside the office himself. He swiped an arm across his chin to get the dripping to stop. “M wanted to debrief her. Not that she really knows anything, I don’t think. But for procedure's sake, I suppose.”

Bond seemed to sense Q’s own trepidation, which had only been worsened by all those recent sleepless nights. He clapped Q once on the back–with a little too much force, but Q didn’t have it in him to glower this time. 

“M will treat her fine. He knows she’s not an employee, or a threat,” said Bond.

“I assumed as much.” Q took off his glasses and rubbed his fists into his eyelids. “It’s just the exhaustion talking. He’ll let her go in a bit and she’ll head home.” 

A ragged thought drifted through Q’s head: And then, this time, you might even break up with him. Normally he would have voiced such a thought aloud; it helped his snarky demeanor considerably. But this time it was true, and he was surprised by the ache in his chest at the thought.

The man next to him nodded slowly, then leaned one shoulder on the wall. “She’s a pretty woman, your girlfriend.”

The ache grew deeper; Q felt his blood run slightly cold. When he looked up at Bond’s face, he had to work his tongue several times to unstick it enough for speech. Even then, he was quite sure the horror in his voice was plain. “Did you sleep with her?”

Why the thought bothered him so much, Q couldn’t say, except that in this case he couldn’t blame the exhaustion. He’d worried about it before dropping you off, after all. But he knew that Bond had slept with damn near every woman in the office, and that didn’t bother him. It didn’t bother him that Bond and Miss Moneypenny certainly acted as though they slept together all the time, whether or not they actually had. But with you, it was different. And he couldn’t put his finger on why.

The casual smirk Bond threw Q didn’t help matters. “Are you jealous, Q?”

Q broke eye contact and cleared his throat. “No. I–Of course not. I just wondered if that should be mentioned to the psychologist. I wouldn’t want [Name] failing because there were facts deliberately left out of the background details.”

He heard Bond shift away from the wall then walk over to Miss Moneypenny's desk, probably to look at the pictures she had set up there. Q didn’t look behind him to see for sure. But maybe Bond wasn’t doing that, as he said, “As I was saying, your girlfriend is pretty. And she made it quite plain she wasn’t going to sleep with me as soon as she set foot inside my flat.” There was a laugh in Bond’s voice, barely concealed. 

For once, Q couldn’t even be bothered that Bond was making fun of him. He turned. “Really?”

Bond grinned. “I think she’s a little in love with you.”

A smile flitted across Q’s face, but it couldn’t stay for long. The next moment, he was serious again, and his tired eyes found the light above M’s door. “I hope it stays that way,” he said quietly. 

Bond nodded. “For your sake, I hope so, too.”

[strawwritesfic]

Asexual!Q x Female!Reader: Logical Fallacy [Ch. 18]

Summary: Q’s got one hundred and two problems. His girlfriend is, technically speaking, every single one.

Challenge:  “102 Things A Guy Should Know About Girls” challenge by Miss Chocobo on Lunaescence Archives.

Ratings/Warnings/Tags: T (foul language; sexual references; asexual!Q; sexual!reader; a running gag about sexual harassment; double standard: sexual harassment, female on male; sexual harassment played for comedy; James Bond & Reader friendship; civilian!reader; artist!reader; complicated family relationships; reader has a really big family; miscommunications; MI6 would not behave this way in reality; set post-Skyfall; joking references made to Bond/Q)

Pairings: Q/Female!Reader; James Bond/Eve Moneypenny

Tag List: @imaginesfire; @rory-cakes​

Master List

Rule #18: Don’t say you understand when you don’t. That’s bad.

It didn’t take long to get Bond pulled in. Two days. That was all Q was given to handle the situation on his own. When his time was up, Bond went off. Without his (completely unregulated) bodyguard work, you were left to be dumped at MI6.

This was stressful for all parties involved. No one really wanted an unqualified citizen wandering around the place, but where else could you go? Leaving you to wander the city alone or even just stay at your flat would leave you open to attack, kidnapping, torture.

No one seemed to believe Q when he said he hadn’t told you anything.

He knew that it couldn’t be easy for you either. Not that he'd been able to see much of you. You’d been allowed to send only a brief message to Victoria to let her know you were okay. Other than that? No outside contact. And since there wasn’t anyone to be spared to look after you, you got shoved alone into one of the medical rooms in the cellar.

When Q went to visit you on that third night, he found you sitting eerily calm on the military-style cot there. Eerily, he thought, because your hands were covered in charcoal stains and you didn’t seem to be moving at all.

You looked up as he closed the door behind him, though. He ran a hand self-consciously through his hair. It felt greasy; he was badly in need of a shower. At least you had that luxury available. It would be another sleepless night for Q. No one got to sleep, not at a time like this.

The shadows underneath your eyes told him you hadn’t been sleeping anyway.

“Hey,” you told Q through trembling lips. 

To his knowledge, you hadn’t cried, not once through this entire ordeal. But he’d known you long enough that he could tell when it was close. He tried to smile reassuringly as he sat down next to you, but in his current state of disrepair and guilt, he couldn’t manage even that.

“Hello,” he replied.

“How are things topside?”

“They’re…coming along.”

Silence fell, and in it Q could hear the mosquito-like buzzing of the overhead lights. His exhausted mind buzzed along with it, though at the same time he was hyperaware of the fact that you were sitting right next to him, and that the last time he’d seen you had been nearly forty-eight hours ago.

“What have you been drawing?” 

He reached unthinkingly for your sketchpad, but you snatched it away and shoved it behind your back. 

Q’s eyebrows furrowed. "What’s the matter?”

Your eyes slid away from his and fixed on your bare feet hanging several inches above the tiled floor. “It’s not pretty.”

“Ah.”

Quiet again. He felt his blood rushing through his veins, carrying half-formed thoughts that didn’t help anything. He should say something. This was his fault. But–

“Alton,” you whispered. “I want to go home.”

A rough swallow cleared his throat enough for more words. “I know,” he said in what he hoped was a soothing tone. “We’ll get to go soon. Mr. Bond is an expert in these sorts of situations.”

When you turned back to look at Q, he felt a rush of fear. Your darkened eyes didn’t seem to be looking at him, and your voice cracked at just the wrong place. “I’m scared, Alton.”

Without warning, you pressed yourself against him and began to sob into Q’s shoulder. He didn’t know what to do. You never cried like this. Something was wrong. Terribly wrong.

But he couldn’t let you go home. He couldn’t let you out. The best he could do was take the short rest period given to him to hug you right back and whisper, “I understand. I know.”

[strawwritesfic]

Asexual!Q x Female!Reader: Logical Fallacy [Ch. 17]

Summary: Q’s got one hundred and two problems. His girlfriend is, technically speaking, every single one.

Challenge: “102 Things A Guy Should Know About Girls” challenge by Miss Chocobo on Lunaescence Archives.

Ratings/Warnings/Tags: T (foul language; sexual references; asexual!Q; sexual!reader; a running gag about sexual harassment; double standard: sexual harassment, female on male; sexual harassment played for comedy; James Bond & Reader friendship; civilian!reader; artist!reader; complicated family relationships; reader has a really big family; miscommunications; MI6 would not behave this way in reality; set post-Skyfall; joking references made to Bond/Q)

Pairings: Q/Female!Reader; James Bond/Eve Moneypenny

Tag List: @imaginesfire; @rory-cakes​

Master List

Rule #17: Don’t ever lie to us. We always find out.

For once in his life, Q did the leading. His hand clutched at yours as he sprinted through the streets. He could hear the clatter of your shoes against the pavement behind him. A few passersby threw confused looks at the pair of you, but he ignored them. Time was of the essence.

At last Bond’s new flat appeared before him. Q slowed to a halt in front of the door before turning to look at you. 

Your eyes were wide in your face, though there didn’t appear to be any tears there yet. That was good. Perhaps he would manage to pull this off without alerting you to the true danger you were in.

“Alton,” you said after catching your breath, “Where are you taking me?”

He didn’t answer that. Q kept his gaze focused on your face, as if he was trying to memorize it. “Did you bring your things?”

“Yeah, of course.” 

You held up the too-light bag hanging off one shoulder. The outlines of the items inside showed clearly through the thin material. Of course. Q told you to grab the essentials, and what did you do? Stuff a sketchpad and a couple of pencils into your overnight bag. Whatever happened to a change of clothes? Or a toothbrush for crying out loud?

But beggars couldn’t be choosers. Besides, Bond slept with enough women. He probably had a few clean toothbrushes to spare. 

Instead of reprimanding you, Q took a deep breath and placed his hands on your shoulders. “You’re going to be staying with Mr. Bond for a little while.”

For the first time, fear washed over your features. “But what about–”

“I need to do some things for work. I’ll be fine.”

“Doesn’t Mr. Bond need to be there, too?”

“He’s not assigned to this particular mission, no.” 

Now the tears came. They didn’t roll down your cheeks, but Q could see them pooling against your lower eyelids. When it came down to the wire, you always showed the courage Q so often felt he himself lacked. He gave you a swift hug, then stepped away again. You looked absolutely miserable, and he wished for one iota he could at least explain himself.

But he couldn’t. It had to be that way. Q could not, for any reason, explain to you that this was his problem, or why that was. You were in enough danger without knowing the details.

“Is everything okay, Alton?” you whispered.

Q made absolutely certain to meet your eyes as he lied, “Everything is fine.”

He could tell that you did not believe him. Your face turned an ashy version of its usual tone, but you nodded all the same. 

Q moved one hand to back to your shoulder, pointing toward the entryway with his other. “You’ll find Mr. Bond inside. He’ll take care of you. All right?”

A brief sniffle delayed your answer. “All right.”

“Good.” One last, quick kiss to your forehead, and Q was off. “Stay safe.”

[strawwritesfic]

Logical Fallacy Master List

Summary: Q’s got one hundred and two problems. His girlfriend is, technically speaking, every single one.

Challenge:  “102 Things A Guy Should Know About Girls” challenge by Miss Chocobo on Lunaescence Archives.

Ratings/Warnings/Tags: T (foul language; sexual references; asexual!Q; sexual!reader; a running gag about sexual harassment; double standard: sexual harassment, female on male; sexual harassment played for comedy; James Bond & Reader friendship; civilian!reader; artist!reader; complicated family relationships; reader has a really big family; miscommunications; MI6 would not behave this way in reality; set post-Skyfall; joking references made to Bond/Q)

Pairings: Q/Female!Reader; James Bond/Eve Moneypenny

Notes: Way back in the year 2013, I was dragged against my will to a showing of Skyfall while on vacation with my family. I had no experience with the James Bond franchise outside of my parents watching a marathon of the old, old movies during a different vacation when I was in elementary school. I expected to hate the film. Instead, by the time the opening credits rolled, I was completely in love.

That being said, I do not consider myself a serious fan of the series. I’ve never bothered to watch the rest of the non-Craig movies and decided after trying to slog my way through the Casino Royale book that I would rather light the written James Bond on fire than read any of Fleming’s other works.

I’m in it for the hot people and the gorgeous cinematography, folks, and this collection is about as silly as they come. I imprinted asexuality onto Q from the start, wanted to write some stories about his adventures with his decidedly-NOT-asexual girlfriend, and this was born. I’m under no delusion that the British Secret Service works this way in reality or in the media I consume.

Please keep in mind as you read the chapter titles that I “disprove” some of the “rules” in the challenge, so there’s no need to get all angry if a “rule” offends you. And sometimes I might “prove” a certain rule, but that doesn’t mean that I necessarily approve of that behavior personally. This is mostly supposed to be a fluffy, comedic story, and almost nothing is to be taken all that seriously.

And here is the usual reminder for any of my Bond stuff: I am not British. I know no British people willing to “Brit Pick” for me. If you have corrections, you are more than welcome to inform me of them, and I will do my best to incorporate them as I go.

As of 2/22/2022, I have not seen No Time to Die, so there will not be spoilers for that movie in this collection! In fact, there aren’t any spoilers for Spectre either, because I really, really didn’t like that movie. All references to the Craig movies stop with Skyfall.

As of 03/04/2023, I have seen No Time to Die, but I thoroughly disliked it and Spectre, so there are not likely to be any calls forward to those particular films. And yes, that means that I understand that the Q in the Craig films most likely shares the sexuality of his actor. I am by no means attempting to erase his sexuality with this story. 

Posting Status: Incomplete & In Progress

Rule #1: Do not cheat on a girl.

Rule #2: Be aware of all your girlfriend’s guy friends, brothers, fathers, etc.

Rule #3: Never miss an opportunity to tell her that she’s beautiful.

Rule #4: If she slapped you hard, you probably deserved it.

Rule #5: Do not be afraid of holding her.

Rule #6: Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend.

Rule #7: Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can.

Rule #8: If a guy is bothering your girlfriend, it is your right to beat the shit out of him.

Rule #9: If you’re talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.

Rule #10: Never, ever slap her.

Rule #11: Go along with her to a chick flick every once in a while.

Rule #12: If you’re officially dating and you’re introducing her to your friends, you’d better introduce her as your girlfriend.

Rule #13: Girls are fragile.

Rule #14: Memorize your girlfriend’s birthday.

Rule #15: Don’t drench yourself in the cologne,

Rule #16: You don’t have to spend a million dollars on a gift.

Rule #17: Don’t ever lie to us. 

Rule #18: Don’t say you understand when you don’t.

Rule # 19: Remember: Girls are pretty, but yours is the prettiest!

Rule # 20: Saying something sweet might get you off the hook.

Rule #21: Size does matter.

[strawwritesfic]

Asexual!Q x Female!Reader: Logical Fallacy [Ch. 16]

Summary: Q’s got one hundred and two problems. His girlfriend is, technically speaking, every single one.

Challenge:  “102 Things A Guy Should Know About Girls” challenge by Miss Chocobo on Lunaescence Archives.

Ratings/Warnings/Tags: T (foul language; sexual references; asexual!Q; sexual!reader; a running gag about sexual harassment; double standard: sexual harassment, female on male; sexual harassment played for comedy; James Bond & Reader friendship; civilian!reader; artist!reader; complicated family relationships; reader has a really big family; miscommunications; MI6 would not behave this way in reality; set post-Skyfall; joking references made to Bond/Q)

Pairings: Q/Female!Reader; James Bond/Eve Moneypenny

Tag List: @imaginesfire​; @rory-cakes​

Master List

Rule #16: You don’t have to spend a million dollars on a gift. It doesn’t have to be expensive; it needs to be meaningful.

“Alton. Hey, Alton!”

Your voice was not enough to completely rouse Q from his slumber. He squeezed his eyes shut a little tighter, to get the sunlight to go away. Even though he knew that wouldn’t be enough for you, he hoped. Five more minutes…

“Alton!” This last exclamation was accompanied by a rough shake of his shoulders. He awoke with a start to see a [Name]-shaped blur with its knees on either side of his hips. The sight and the shock combined were enough to make him cough for a full minute before he could respond:

“What is it?” he asked with barely contained annoyance.

You, however, were not to be deterred. “It’s nearly nine o’ clock! You’re going to be late for work!” Perhaps you threw your arms out with these words. Q couldn’t quite tell; everything was still murky. His exhaustion didn’t help things.

“I’m not going to work today,” he mumbled. Q’s fingers trailed across the nightstand until, at last, he found his glasses. A moment later, he placed them on his face and blinked sleepily up at you. Your now clear features showed obvious confusion. You took a moment to stare at him and then gave his shoulders another hard shake.

“You can’t skip work! They’ll throw you in prison.”

Sleep was apparently not going to return to him. With a sigh, Q slid his legs out from underneath you and placed his feet on the floor. “No,” he said with a yawn. “They wouldn’t go that far. You have a very active imagination, [Name].”

You cocked your head to one side, your eyes wide. “Are you sick?”

As much as Q knew you would love an excuse to make soup, he could not claim to have an illness. He shook his head and barely suppressed a smile as he stood. “I’m not sick.”

“Then–”

“I took the day off, so neither of us will be getting in trouble.”

The look you gave Q was almost comical, especially considering the wild, uncombed hair framing your face and your knees still splayed wide where he used to be lying. Slowly, your eyes narrowed. You lifted a hand to grasp your chin.

“Why would you take the day off?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” Q gave a tiny shrug and moved toward the door. “Thought it might be prudent, considering it’s our anniversary and all.”

Your mouth fell wide open, then you bounded across the length of the bed to land at Q’s feet. You could hardly speak for grinning. “You remembered?”

Q smiled and ruffled your hair a bit. “I remembered. And I have the whole day off, so we can spend it together.”

He thought he saw tears in your eyes, but he couldn’t see them for long. You threw your arms around him and broke away only to declare:

“That’s the best present you could have given me.”

“Happy anniversary, [Name].”

[strawwritesfic]

Asexual!Q x Female!Reader: Logical Fallacy [Ch. 15]

Summary: Q’s got one hundred and two problems. His girlfriend is, technically speaking, every single one.

Challenge:  “102 Things A Guy Should Know About Girls” challenge by Miss Chocobo on Lunaescence Archives.

Ratings/Warnings/Tags: T (foul language; sexual references; asexual!Q; sexual!reader; a running gag about sexual harassment; double standard: sexual harassment, female on male; sexual harassment played for comedy; James Bond & Reader friendship; civilian!reader; artist!reader; complicated family relationships; reader has a really big family; miscommunications; MI6 would not behave this way in reality; set post-Skyfall; joking references made to Bond/Q)

Pairings: Q/Female!Reader; James Bond/Eve Moneypenny

Tag List: @imaginesfire, @rory-cakes​​

Master List

Rule #15: Don’t drench yourself in the cologne, but smell good.

“Come on, Q. Look sharp. We’re about to dock.”

From his post at the ship’s railing, Q lifted his clammy head. Bond stood in a nearby door, outlined by the light of the ship’s interior. It was all Q could do to simply look at him. Glaring, at this point, was too exhausting.

“I am well aware–” But he couldn’t finish that sentence. The boat gave a final heave, and so did Q’s stomach. He bent over to vomit again. Slowly, though still with more movement than Q believed strictly necessary, the boat ground to a halt.

Bond patted Q once on the back. “Next time, bring some Kwells .”

“Next time?” Q demanded weakly. “I told you all I don’t like traveling!”

“You said you didn’t like to fly.” Q did his best to scowl. Unfortunately, this did nothing to Bond except cause him to smirk. “Well, clean yourself up a bit before you get back on land. You wouldn’t want [Name] running away from you in fright.”

In his current state, Q couldn’t manage a quick enough retort. Before he could even opened his mouth to reply, Bond disappeared without so much as a “see you at work come Monday.” Q made a face, then leaned over to grab his bag with quavering arms.

How Bond managed to leave so quickly, Q would never know. Though the ship certainly wasn’t carrying a pleasure cruise, enough people crammed its hallways that he was lucky to take one step every five minutes. All the while, the floor bobbed underneath his feet, causing his nausea to roll with the waves.

Outside, the air was clean and cold. More importantly, the ground did not move. Q took several minutes to orient himself before blinking blearily at his surroundings. As much as he hated to admit it, he rather hoped he’d find you waiting for him. He wasn’t sure if he would stumble into the right apartment complex with his thoughts this fuzzy.

And there you were, sitting on a bench, your eyes wide in your face as you watched him from afar. It struck Q at just that moment that this was his first away mission. Two weeks was a long time for him to not see you, and it was a testament to how ill he must have looked that you hadn’t rushed straight up to tackle him. Slowly, he trudged over until he stood a few feet away.

“Hello,” said Q.

“Hi.”

Your fingers beat an anxious tattoo against your seat. Q managed a half-smile. “Go on then. Get it over with.”

It took you less than a second. One moment, you were sitting there, the next you had crashed into his front and thrown your arms around him. After a brief pause, he returned the hug.

“I missed you, too.” He allowed you to stand there with your face buried into his chest for several long minutes. Given the state of things, Q might have left you longer. Then he smelt something familiar–familiar and curious. “Are you wearing my cologne?”

You took a step backward to smile at him sheepishly. “It smells like home.”

“[Name], you have been home the entire time I was gone.”

“Yeah, but,” you shrugged and Q noticed you hadn’t taken your hands off his waist, “it isn’t home without you.”

A reluctant sigh slipped from his lips. Then Q disengaged–but only long enough for him to adjust his bag on his shoulder and take your hand. “Let’s get home then.”