#so much trauma oop

[kingkat12]

currently going through the 57 chapter Roman Godfrey fic i wrote two years ago, and damn this is so fucking rough but the plot is BOMBBBB, so if i ever do a rewrite i think y'all would eat this up lol

[chanelle-lize]

I used to have a really hard time bringing up the fact that I graduated from high school a year late without feeling the need to explain why and insisting that it wasn't my fault while simultaneously kicking myself for how much I sounded like I was just making excuses for something I should take responsibility for.

Then I watched Dimension 20's "The Seven" and suddenly I could simply say that I was a super senior.

The first time I heard the phrase "super senior" was in reference to Antiope Jones, a Black girl who had been held back a year after getting kidnapped and imprisoned by members of a fundamentalist cult, and like, girl, same.

So, since then, instead of anxiously spinning out any time I tried to tell a personal high school anecdote, I could just say I was a super senior, and then my brain would auto complete that statement with "like Antiope Jones" and I'd feel good about myself because Antiope Jones Is That Bitch.

That's what the problem had been the whole time. I wasn't worried about how other people would perceive me; I had been struggling with how I perceived myself.

Thanks, Aabria.

[qoldenskies]

YOOOO QOLDEN! IM SUPER HAPPY TO SEE YOU CAUSE YOU ALWAYS HAVE SOME OF THE BEST MOST JOYFUL ART IN THE WORLD AND YOUR WRITING IS ALWAYS FIRE!!

Anyways, you disappeared off my feed for a minute and I was thinking about you

Any tips of all the turtles characterisation? I'm struggling with Raph and Leo, and recently realised how hard it is to write Mikey and make him an actual person. With Donnie, it's a bit easier because he's Donnie- he has got clear character in the show and every one of his actions can be linked to his family, etc.

Also, will there be any Brains and Brawn- centric fics that you'll work on? I feel like you'd write a really good BnB fic that'd make me sob

i just write leo making decisions that make the situation 3000% worse, before immediately locking the fuck in and doing the most emotionally intelligent, competent thing that he possibly can. it actually really aligns with how he operates in the show. he bitches and he fights and he goes down kicking and screaming and then he fixes it perfectly fine. you have to drag him by the ankles into making responsible decisions. usually through the mud. and even then he'll WHINE ABOUT IT the whole time. leo hates being honest and he loves lying. i think it's funny how much he loves lying. this is probably why literally every single time i write him i make someone mad at him. like there's always people yelling about leo being stupid in my comment sections. being clever just does not make him free from his own stupid biases i guess lmao.

when it comes to raph... ive written up a paragraph and deleted it like 5 times i genuinely dont even know how to describe it. but all i can really say is that dont let the maternal figure gentle puppydog endlessly patient raph characterization in the fandom drag you down because i think there's a lot more fun to be had with how testy and impatient he is. he always feels like he's running after them all and he's exhausted with it, especially because he's not good at making decisions on the fly. arguing and shouting is how he handles his stress. i put him in a lot of situations where fear can kind of cancel that out but those are also usually ones where he's not the one taking the lead. i feel like he just clashes so hard with leo because they dont like to listen to each other, and both of them hated being called out for shit they actually do. LIKE WHO TOLD YOU. raph will come to important conclusions on his own but usually if you try to argue with him he'll just double down lmfao. also take your drafts and make raph at least 10% sillier trust me it always helps

as for bnb things.... i have some stuff in the bthb! its actually wild how little content i have planned for their duo dynamic in particular because they're quite obviously one of my favorites. is caged lungs technically my only brains and brawn fic????? ummmmmm

[moonshere]

Been thinking a lot about this “the family plays isat” AU and how it might happen

Siffrin would probably refuse for them to play it if he was aware of it (thinking about how they said when learning about the diary in the library that they would hate it if someone read their deepest thoughts) and the rest of the family would also respect that, because it really would be a breach of trust. They’d prefer it if Siffrin talked to them himself, after all.

A situation I could see it happening is if, post-Loop battle, Siffrin’s Craft exhaustion got so severe he gets knocked out for a full week or two, maybe more! And the family would be so worried and desperate to understand what happened so that if the game appeared to them suddenly, they’d be tempted enough to play through it. If only just to figure out how to help Siffrin wake up again

(and probably a mixture of other emotions too, wanting to see the conversations Siffrin had with them that they don’t remember, feeling guilty that they didn’t notice soon enough, terrified that Siffrin is hiding something else. I mean, Siffrin straight up did not mention the Loop battle to them at all, even after they promised to talk! so they’d be worried on what happened there already)

Honestly I think all of them would also be exhausted and on bed rest after the whole quest to defeat the King was over, it took months of constant movement and stress so the whole family would crash hard afterwards. Cuz of that they’d be stuck together on like the infirmary or a private room with strict orders to take it easy, what better time to play the game than that?

[sweetmariihs2]

I squeeze into a small hole

Through the eyes of needles

To stitch you up again

Even though I know so well I can't fix anything

[...]

And I need you

And I need you

To understand

To understand

Sometimes I see light

And I fear it's only fantasy

Oh, wouldn't it be tragic

If there is no light in me, not any magic?

And I need you

To forgive me

If you can

I know the best I can

Isn't always good enough

It hurts to know I hurt you

Like I know it hurts for you to know you've hurt me

And now my blood is yours

And life is slowly losing touch

How do we learn to tend to

These invisible wounds our homes gave us?

I can't heal you

And you can't heal me

Even if we wanted to

And how I wanted to.

And I need you

To stop needing me

Like I've needed you

We both need to

Tend to the invisible wounds...

[in-this-essay-i-wont]

🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨MASSIVE SPOILER FOR MOUTHWASHING ALERT🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨

Unfortunately I am a sheep and saw a bunch of banger mouth washing fanart so I decided to watch.,.. now I am noticing a bit of a trend here though that I wanna bring up.,.. here me out chat.,,.

Look it’s like. PAINFULLY obvious that Anya got sexually abused by Jimmy, and she’s clearly dealing with the horrific ramifications and circumstances that she is forced to deal with I mean. She like. Has to ask her rapist. To force pain pills. Down a her captains throat. Like holy shit. ANYWAY

There seems to be a big trend of painting curly as this like. Perfect person though. Look he was a good guy! He was a good captain and knew how to get his team together and unite as a unit but, he is, unfortunately, going to fall into the pitfall that men often do, and try to justify his shit ass friends actions and try to shirk off Anya’s worries and fears and SEXUAL TRAUMA as something he can “talk out with his good lifelong buddy” and wont let Anya feel safe with any means of protection. He doesn’t think his friend could be that malicious. That evil. That horrible. It’s ignorant, and it’s hurtful and traumatizing to Anya.

And then I see mfers like.,,. Putting Anya and curly together like good couple or smrh like guys.,,.. guys let her rest.,,. She’s had enough.,… let her go to the pink pony club,,,.

[justsomerandomplanet]

Realizing this scene of yuji in the shibuya op is supposed to represent the ppl sukuna killed in his massacre. Oh its so over for me

[mudstoneabyss]

actually. the specific phrasing that boy Kevin wants to kill older Kevin with "I must disassemble him, piece by piece, so that everything inside of the Old Kevin comes out. Only then can the New Kevin truly begin." is so incredibly the idea that to heal from trauma and "improve" you have to destroy every "wrong" part of yourself, that everything "tainted" by it has to somehow be replaced by something untouched (which isn't possible)

[lavenoon]

rough little doodle of the besties because I love them

[hexxter]

Not the glitching pls I can’t do this again 😔🙏🏻

[perpetualexistence]

Heyyy!!! I had the idea for a Jester noah costume design from "The Dragon And The Jester" while walking home from school and I HAD to draw it

Hope you like it!

Aaaaa! Fanart for an AU of mine! That I haven't made public yet but now I'm pretty sure I'm going to once Alenoah week is done and I fully Recover from it

I love how you incorporated his canon color scheme into it! And the Venetian mask of constant mockery! And the little cowl looks like a spider web that he's caught in the middle of! That boy certainly isn't hiding the fact that he's tired and suffering through dark humor and cruel jokes at other people's expenses!

I can already hear the little jingle jangles of him moving now. Thanks so much for this!

[qoldenskies]

cc Donnie wearing the others' hoodies is so cute I need more of it

i think its partially a smell thing and also the fact that theyre pretty much all too big on him (although even his own are, at least at first). when he's not wearing his battle shells (and for cc!donnie, i think he alternates between really long periods of refusing to take it off and times where putting it on feels just as triggering) even some of mikey's hoodies will dwarf him because they're built for larger shells than what he has.

sometimes he cant bare to be around them but he needs them more than anything, so that's the way he handles it. on worse days it's the closest thing he can really get to a hug from them, even if he can be around them otherwise, and they're happy to provide where they can. they'll never hesitate to reach back when he reaches out first.

honestly, it might be a new behavior of his, because i couldnt actually see donnie doing it beforehand. mikey was definitely the hoodie thief of the family (leo strikes me as the type to steal clothes too, but less comfy clothing and more things he thinks are good stylistically. which mostly means he steals from donnie's wardrobe because he's got an actual sense of style and their sizes can be similar, for the clothes built for his battle shell lol), donnie could provide for himself and generally found his few hoodies comforting enough. they were always a little sterile and smelled exactly how he wanted them to. they'd probably go out of their way to get one of them if donnie needed it, so he'd have no reason to wear their clothes or anything.

but that's different now. it's a gesture of comfort from them that he needs more than anything, because he'd have never taken from them like that when they were cursed. he can look down and put the pieces back together when he cant think straight-- and more importantly, they smell like home and family, while his regular hoodies mostly just smell like laundry detergent and fabric softener lmfao.

[juliets-roller-derby-awesomeness]

you 👏 dont 👏 get 👏 a 👏 say 👏

leave. goodbye. kindly fuck off 🙃🙃

she has a step father that raised her more than you did, ask him shawn

ask her mom

don't ask anyone, it's 2012 ask her yourself, ask her close friends, ask her family she sees at christmas

i despise this man. he's literally still conning people why do we like him?

"the biggest con of all was on your own daughter"

"i was never embarrassed, just disappointed" no girlfriend you were embarrassed. 30 minutes ago you told shawn not to go looking for him bc he "isn't very presentable"

[pagesofkenna]

i wanted to make a post about a thing but the more i think about it the more i want to say and it's just going to end up being a big ramble essay, so instead i'll just give the thesis statement, thusly:

as the #1 Ratgrinders Apologist (self-appointed), of course they're the final boss fight to the death. i expected nothing less and the people trying to make discourse about it are ignoring the entire context of this being a Dungeons and Dragons game

[skybites]

𝕐𝕠𝕦 𝕝𝕠𝕠𝕜 𝕛𝕦𝕤𝕥 𝕝𝕚𝕜𝕖 𝕪𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕗𝕒𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕣.

[ascensionism]

Since I'm kind of on the angst train already, I actually want to discuss a plotted thing I have with @antiquelic - in relation to Mountain, his brother Moss, and a rather violent conflict shortly after the loss of their summoners.

When the first three papas were killed, neither of the brothers handled it very well. Mountain persevered and didn't succumb to any urge of lashing out or falling to Pit instinct, even as he mourned Terzo deeply. Moss, though, left the ministry and ventured into the forest nearby. This is crucial information, by the way.

Because Mountain is an estimated ~2000+ years old; he spent all of these years, save for the decade between Moss's summoning by Primo and Mountain's by Terzo, defending and protecting his older brother in the Pit. Moss is the closest person he has both in the Pit and topside. A lot of his protective tendencies come from having spent literal millennia keeping his brother safe, and from other ghouls that would've dared to take them on... If Moss and Mountain's respective sizes of 7'1" and 8'9" hadn't warded them away.

So, when Moss disappeared, Mountain went to find him. And Hazel - also one of Aleera's ghouls, the sweetheart that she is - wanted to help.

Issue: Moss is relying solely on Pit instinct to cope with Primo's death. The bigger issue: Hazel is very much like prey. The catalyst: Mountain would defend those closest to him with his life, literally. Hazel is like his daughter.

Moss had went for Hazel. And Mountain, already struggling with the fact that he could do nothing to protect the one who brought him topside, is not about to let harm befall anyone else he really cares about - not even when the instigator is his brother. This heightened state of protectiveness is enough to push against the boundaries of his instinct.

What's also important to this is that I talk about Mountain's capabilities unglamoured.

While he's 8'9", that isn't accounting for the height of his horns; they're incredibly large, and very sturdy to match. They're designed to clash and cause damage as much as they're there to defend himself. On top of this, his teeth are similar to a bear's - and yes, he can maul quite effectively with them. They're huge. Seeing as a bear can stand between 8-10 feet when they're on their hind legs, the size of their teeth is about the same as what Mountain's would be, and they are most especially designed to tear things open and apart. His claws are actually the least dangerous part of him.

He's not the fastest ghoul by any means, but he is generally faster than his brother in this instance - his brother is shorter, but built more stocky. Mountain has relatively thin limbs, letting him be more agile, but he has density so he can't be so easily injured... By most. His survival in the Pit for so long is because of these traits, and the fact he was always a unit with his brother.

Now: the actual what happens.

Mountain is not a vicious ghoul at heart, but he does what it takes for his and other's survivals. Hazel is small and can't defend herself. The moment Moss lunges and grazes her, Mountain goes straight for him and breaks into a fight.

And this isn't your fight club fights, where it's controlled and measured so ghouls can let off some steam - no. This is full Pit instinct, strike-to-kill fighting. Whether Moss can register what is happening or not doesn't matter much to Mountain. What matters to him is that he keeps Moss from killing Hazel, and that means fighting and doing enough to make him stand down.

The damage done to their surrounding area in the forest is expansive. Trees felled, boulders smashed, ground torn up. The damage to each other is relatively similar. Moss breaks off parts of Mountain's antlers. Mountain leaves lasting puncture wounds in multiple areas, but not in any potentially fatal locations. They have numerous other injuries on top of that, but they both lose count of them with how long the fight progresses.

But perhaps the most dangerous part of all:

Mountain's focus wanes when he tries to check on Hazel, with the smell of blood in the air. The fight ends with Moss's teeth in Mountain's throat.

Moss is pulled away (by the only ghoul that makes Mountain look small, being 15ft tall), but the damage is well and truly done by that point - it doesn't kill Mountain, of course, but it requires medical treatment, and it leaves a lasting scar in place. His ghoulish physiology lets him heal better from it than most, even, but his vocal cords go affected; his voice has a persistent, underlying hoarseness to it after, and it takes months before he can speak at the frequency he could before.

Mind you, he would've been still making some recovery from this injury by the time he goes on the Rats! On The Road tour (remembering that the tour was announced in Feb 2018, the papas were killed ~March 2018, and the tour went right through May that same year). He's stubborn like that. And, being drummer, he didn't really need to stress over speaking when he was behind the drumkit - so he didn't believe that he should've been replaced with another earth ghoul for the brief stint. (Unless I plot this with someone.)

The scar is most visible when he has no glamour, with puncture wounds and some tearing where Moss's teeth caught as he was pulled away. In glamour, he utilises a tattoo to hide them, but it's still noticeable when more closely observed.

He's not affronted by it, though. Saddened? Sure. He doesn't enjoy being in conflict, let alone with his brother. But it reminds him that he will always fight and bleed for those he's close with - and, in a way, it reminds him that he is still capable of doing that, when he is one of the last ghouls who watched Terzo be torn away from them.