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lovesickeros · 6 months ago

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☆ choir of the faithless

{☆} characters venti, kaeya, the abyss {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, drabble, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings violence (minor) {☆} word count 2.7k

One moment, you lay wistlessly in your bed, head full of fleeting thoughts and ideas you bounced around internally. You were moment away from falling asleep, the draw of exhaustion unraveling the threads of your mind, pulling you apart and weaving your thoughts into the fathomless depths of a boundless dream.

The next you conclude that is exactly where you must be – blinking rapidly against the bright sun that bears down upon you through the massive branches and array of thousands of leaves swaying above you. It can only be a dream because you know those roots, those winding branches and the soothing song of wind chimes as leaves rustle and sway in the invisible path of the wind. It feels too real, but don't many dreams? You reach your hand sluggishly skyward, imagining the feeling of touching those leaves so high above, admiring the way light fractures as it passes through the tree so massive it blots out the sky above you. You'd have to crane your neck just to catch a proper glimpse of solemn blue past the swaying ocean of vivid greens.

It's beautiful.

It's familiar in the way home is. That warmth that settles in your chest, the solemn, quiet moments between. You've spent hours staring up at this tree, both your first steps and your last, simply admiring it all for what fleeting moments you can cling to.

You've played the game long enough – strayed towards its familiar branches at they reach towards the heavens – to recognize Windrise at even a passing glance. The perfect portrait of Mondstadt – the massive oak at the center, the statue of the seven with its hands outstretched and its wings curled protectively around itself..a memory of something you've seen a hundred thousand times, lingering like a ghost amongst its branches and roots, clinging to its familiarity. Maybe Mondstadt isn't the most complex, or gorgeous, or detailed..but it was the first stepping stone to the world of Teyvat you knew. It was the beginning of the Travelers journey and your own – the first, hesitant step into a game you'd learned to love.

You might as well enjoy it might it lasts, right?

This tumultuous, fragile dream of yours.

You sit up with no small amount of hesitancy, taking in the rolling, distant hills and far away cliffs. Mondstadt isn't that far – far enough that it bleeds into the scenery, but you feel that pang of fragile familiarity seeing it in the distance anyway. In contrast to its nation, Mondstadt stood like a towering beacon of stability, stark grey against the ever expanding hues of green and blue, a symbol of tranquility among the monster-laden lands beyond its walls. You still come by once and a while, whether or not it's your favorite place to linger – if only to reminisce and ponder the countless hours you've sunk into the game. To take a moment and admire the nation that had slowly dragged you into loving the world you've become so familiar with, to truly take a moment and process your endless journey further, deeper, into the mystery of Teyvat as it slowly unraveled like a spool of thread.

It felt almost real. The grass beneath you, the wind rustling the leaves and swirling around you, the warmth of the distant sun as it stood unwavering at its peak – but it was a dream. Vivid, maybe, but still a dream.

You didn't want to wake up from it, though.

It'd be nice to stay here for a little longer, to be able to wander past these fragile barriers of the world around you – but would you wake if you longed to see those distant horizons? Would you even remember this dream? Maybe not.

But the endless urge to explore – to see and truly experience that distant, familiar visage for yourself – was calling. A craving to run your hand along towering stone walls, to trace the intricate lines of the alchemy table you'd used hundreds of times, to get lost in the endless books tucked away in the library..a longing that you could never fulfill.

But you'd try anyway, wouldn't you?

You'd make the most of this fleeting dream – stumbling like a newborn fawn after seelies, watching from hidden perches as the occasional cart rolled by on dirt roads, observing the distant hilichurl with a look of solemn understanding. Re-familiarizing yourself with the paths you'd traveled hundreds of times, treading along the same, curious line you'd taken the Traveler.

Maybe it was just an aspect of the dream, but the wildlife didn't run away like it did in the game – the wild boars startled when you approached, but they'd settle down and continue their idle grazing before long. The occasional crystalfly fluttered to your outstretched hands like a moth to flame, the cool, subtle touch of anemo against your skin like a soft breeze, ephemeral and fleeting.

Even the squirrels did not flee at your boundless curiosity – it is as if you are a ghost, perhaps, wandering these wide spanning plains in search of..well, you aren't sure. You let your feet guide you, just like you used to. There is charm in the aimless exploration, a sort of comfort in wandering and observing the world through new eyes.

Perhaps you should've taken more caution when you reached Mondstadt itself – a dream was a fragile thing, after all..there was no telling when a dream could meld into a nightmare. But you were in the nation of freedom, who could blame you for throwing caution to the wind?

Uncertain as your steps across the bridge were, it was tranquil – ducks skimmed beneath the bridge, fish dotted the serene surface, clear waters rippling with their movements. There was something about it all that felt more alive. It felt more real, for a moment, but what an absurd thought that must be.

A dream is no more real than Teyvat.

And at the gates of the city, at last, you feel relief – the eyes of NPCs glide over you like water over the back of a swan, allowing you to simply step past them without even an utterance of a question. Up close, with your own eyes to guide you, Mondstadt is more alive than it's ever been. The people converse and laugh and breathe – the small details you'd miss looking through the limited frame of the Traveler peek through, now.

You get so lost in admiring it all you almost trip over a cat that strays near your feet, rubbing against your ankles. Your hand twitches, as if to reach down and pet it, to feel it's fur beneath your palm – but the small voice that flows from the tavern stalls you in your tracks. You don't have to turn around to know who it is, you've heard her voice enough times to recognize it – and, really, you'd rather not get caught up in the logistics of interacting with the characters in a dream at the moment. It's not like they can see you, besides. Everyone else didn't even seem to know you were there at all.

And you were here to explore, first. You could test the limits of the dream later, once you're satisfied you've seen it all.

You sidestep the cat – as much as it pains you to ignore it, you really don't know how much time you're afforded in this dream – and take up wandering undeterred. Maybe you'll check out the library, next..you only read a measly fraction of the books there, after all, and the wonder of something new is a tempting lure. Maybe if you get the chance, you'll seek out your favorite character – even if the dream ends there, it'll at least dampen the disappointment when you awake in your own bed again.

Mondstadt is still relatively small, despite seeming so much bigger – by the time you're slinking into the Knights of Favonius Headquarters, your legs are aching from all the walking. Even if you don't find anything too interesting here, well, you'll take sitting down for a moment to catch your breath at least.

The game made it seem so easy to get from Windrise to the city, but your legs practically putty when you peered into the library with a healthy amount of caution – it's not like anyone has even glanced your way since you woke up in this dream, but you knew not to test it around Lisa and her books..

Even if it was a dream, waking up because you got electrocuted by a pissed off librarian didn't sound very appealing.

Especially because, along the way, you'd become the perch for a handful of anemo crystalflies. You'd almost forgotten some linger on the rooftops until now..well, they seemed content to just rest on your limbs, and it's not like they weighed much if anything. It'd probably be fine – how much harm could a crystalfly cause?

The steps down into the lower level of the library creaked slightly as you slowly took in the grandiose room, trying to glimpse some semblance of familiarity amongst the hundreds of book covers nestled into the shelves. Maybe having a reference of just ten or twenty books wasn't exactly the most extensive list – you could barely even remember what books you mindlessly picked up chasing glittering spots like a moth chases the flickering flame.

Maybe you'll see Venti's statue, next – it was impressive enough in game, you could only imagine how it looks in person, how the smooth stone feels beneath your fingertips.

For now, you scour the rows and rows of book, gleaning the contents of the books from the assorted covers and titles so foreign to you. You recognize a scarce few, those you picked up on your first, brisk walk through the library scouring for treasure just to be disappointed at the lack of it. These days you're just happy to bask in the atmosphere and reminisce here – unless you're dragging your feet to do your Theater for the month. Not a lot of room for reminiscing when you're busy fighting for your life to finish on time.

Still, you're almost half disappointed there hasn't been many playable characters around..sure, maybe they'd just ignore you like the other NPCs, but it'd still be nice to see them. If Dawn Winery wasn't so far away, you'd consider dropping by, just to see, but..well, you've hiked long enough, personally.

Though as much as you'd like to busy yourself in the library, you do want to make the most of your time, too. You don't pay much attention to the patter of footsteps as you ascend the stairs and awkwardly step past the guard outside the library, the brief blur of reds and blues in the corner of your eyes gone before you can truly see its source. Well, there's more to see anyway – the cathedral was impressive enough when you first saw it in game, you can only imagine it's magnificence now.

All the stairs definitely feels worse now that you can't just haul yourself up a wall like in game, though. Maybe it would've been better to rest a bit more in the library, but you really didn't want to waste this chance..how often did you really have this much control over a dream, anyway? You feel lucky it hadn't turned into a nightmare.

And it was more than worth it when you crested the top of the stairs, the wind rushing past you for a brief moment and almost making you stumble as your eyes flit towards the towering stone you'd known so well. Hands outstretched and draped in robes, looking all the Archon they are..well, it was a lot more detailed like this. The lull of music doesn't escape you, either – because of course they'd be strumming that lyre beneath their own statue. Playing to an audience who knows not the bard that plays a melody of their own triumphs. The same bard who commands the wind as if an extension of themself, their voice the chimes that sing in tune with its winding paths, free and true.

Even if you've never heard the song they play before, it leaves a warm feeling in your chest – a homesickness, maybe, for a place you've never even been to. A longing for the world made up of lines of code and pixels on a screen. Endless yearning for a world not your own – a place you don't belong.

Poetic, isn't it?

Fitting, seeing as your audience is a bard who loves to tempt another into a riddle of their own, their silver tongue used for mischief rather than malice.

It wouldn't be so bad if you woke up now, you think. Lulled back to reality by the gentle strum of a lyre and the sweeping winds.

A reality all your own.

The harsh twang of a lyre brings you out of your aimless reverie, eyes of the teal ocean meeting your own in a moment of startling clarity. You are almost tempted to look behind you, for they must be perceiving another – but the empty, hollow thud of the lyre hitting the cobbled ground is like a bullet to the chest.

Beneath the shrouded eyes of an Archon, the wind coils into a tightly wound bolt that sings with danger, the draw of a string making your blood run cold and your instincts flare up.

Before you could even process the fact they'd just drawn a bow – the bow you had given them – the pillar of the corridor shattered like glass beneath the force of an elemental arrow, rubble dusting the cobblestone and dragging you out of your horrified stupor. If it hadn't been between the two of you, you can only dread to imagine what an arrow that pulverized rock would do to you.

There's a knot in your stomach as you turn to pace right back down the stairs, but you stutter at the sharp glint of metal and familiar blue hair that stands frozen mid-step – for a moment you can't even register any of this, your mind refuses to accept the stark, bleeding truth right in front of you, but the shrill sound of anemo forces you to make a choice. You only hesitate for a moment before throwing yourself over the edge of the wall, nearly choking on your saliva when you hit the ground – it was farther than you remember, but when your other choice is a blade and an arrow, you're thankful you haven't broken anything yet as you stumble to your feet.

Why haven't you waken up yet? You don't want to be in this dream anymore – you don't want anything to do with the nightmare it's become. Just seeing their faces, familiar and once so calm and warm, contrasted with the sharp edge of danger made you want to be sick.

Water – water will wake you up, right? That always works. Your feet slip on the dirt, struggling to gain purchase, forcing yourself to rush towards the cliffs edge – you have to repeat that it's just a dream like a mantra just to keep yourself calm when you look down, the lapping waves and jagged rocks making you almost reconsider. Not that you get the chance, really, when the wood of the tree beside you is splintered so violently you can feel them digging into your skin.

You don't even realize you've lost your footing until the edge of the cliff gives beneath your heel, air rushing around you and forcing what little breath was left in your lungs out violently. Your vision blurs into a collage of blue and grey, the sky above and the side of the cliff you find yourself falling from flooding your vision – you have to trust you'll simply wake up in your bed once you hit the water. You have to.

You don't want to imagine what it would mean if you didn't.

It's just a dream – all of it is just a dream, no. a nightmare.

And as the water parts from the impact of your body against the surface, it drags you down like an anchor weighed against your chest. Your vision bleeds into white, a chill enveloping your limbs until you feel numb – dead, probably. You must be dead. You died and you plead that you wake up back at home, exhaling whatever breath you had left, cold stinging your throat like shards of glass.

Anchored weightlessly in frigid cold, blinded by stark white, your fleeting thoughts are silenced as your consciousness flickers in and out, lingering long enough only to hear the murmur of a raspy, unearthly voice.

"I believe the experiment can be considered a success, Princess."

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exbotmallow · 2 months ago

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one day i hope the others will realise that green actually has no leader, and tr!bad only plays into it because everyone else has already put him into that position. if everyone saw tr!pangi that way they'd probably send him, because green thinks they'll only respect whatever authority they perceive. and hopefully on that day they'll also realise that green really are individuals who only vow to understand each other, not that every effort they do is a joint effort.

[green + 99% bbh-centric, really, reallllyyy, like ridiculously long analysis post]

[now with added side commentary for the commentary im already making LMAO]

[no genuinely this is so long i just have so much to say and i just spew it here instead of making friends LMAO im so sorry]

[no like genuinely this is a warning its so long like 20 paragraphs its sad SKJDFHDJKS]

today was not green's moment — it was tr!owens.

that matters cause it was tr!owens attemt to cement his legacy. and yes, he had support in that through green, but it was just tr!owen's moment. yet, for some (mostly understandable from yellow's perspective) reason, everyone wants to kill tr!bad, cause tr!bad is "green leader" and these were the actions of "green faction" — despite the fact that tr!bad tried to make it clear he was warning tr!foolish (and was silently willing to step in, even if they didnt know that bit) — and "he" made this decision cause they percieved it that way.

green have blatantly said that they have no leader, and that all individuals support each other but are responsible for all their own actions individually, but yet have been met with nothing but sarcastic "okay's" and being told that they simply dont want to take accountability. tr!bad being told he is a cruel leader who manipulated people into being under him, and to the rest, they're told that they are working under someone cruel on purpose, refusing to see his evil or deciding to be evil on purpose. ¹

the reality is, first tr!pangi saw tr!bad all alone and did him that kindness of not letting him be alone, because even someone who is wrong or scary doesn't deserve isolation. the rest trickled in — all for their own reasons, whether it was because of tr!bad offering to help them grow strong and stable or because of previous experiences surrounding monarchy, or feeling supposed disingenuous feeling from yellow, or otherwise. even joining because they preferred chaos and saw comfort in a faction they wouldn't judge them for it and would even back them up if they wanted.

now, while green may have come together to support each other, they also are honest with esch other in a way that yellow doesn't understand. they are upfront about the fact that they won't support EVERYTHING they do, and are honest about being willing to not only refrain from supporting each other, but willing to lie, deceive, and even kill each other. yellow can't and likely never will understand this, because they all come from a place of favouring kindness above neutrality or even understanding a need for malice or safety from a place of fear. when everything can be nice and sunshine and rainbows if everyone works just a little harder for it, it's hard to understand why someone who perhaps is even peaceful might want to hide behind someone who is scary, or receive help from someone who might make you do something perhaps a little cruel. ²

green are united in knowing that they are inherently bad, scared, or willing to make a few bad decisions if it keeps them safe. they're united in being individuals and owning that. they are a faction in which everyone accepts that they will do different things and will not always agree. green are NOT united in all their decisions. they are simply united in understanding that they are stronger together.

it's also, perhaps, difficult to believe that they have no leader when tr!bad steps up for leader meetings, stands up as the scary back-up for the faction, strategizes with the faction, keeps everyone in the loop, and provides so many resources for the faction. that's very interesting when the leaders of the other factions are not doing anything remotely like it. they stand as a unifying figure, but they don't do all of these things (only some) for their factions like tr!bad does. not saying that he is a better leader — cause again, he's not their leader — but that hes simply a strong, smart member and the only reason they've dubbed him leader when they really have no governing body.

yeah, tr!bad is typically the one recruiting members, but not because he's the leader. he's actually typically the deal breaker — he will lie to you, he will make it obvious, he will be blunt that of the faction, he is the worst. and that he will be the unfortunate face of the faction. that's his kindness to the newbies. he'll let them know that the pacifist tr!lukey, or the pretty and silly walls of green base, or the materials so generously shared with others even outside the faction, are not what heads the factions image. that whatever tr!bad does, no matter the intentions, will be framed with the worst intent behind them the others can think of tr!bad doing.

—

and tr!bad providing is simply cause he has the most resources, more than he has any need for. he's willing to be helpful, to see others grow strong, and to be the fuel for the chaos or games around him. yeah, he sometimes asks something of people who aren't in his faction, but it's the price he's giving for what he's offering. it's often assumed that anything he gives anyone comes with a price, because it's his nature, and he's like that. but, as much as he might whine or complain about it, or try to use it to his advantage at some point, the only time he makes deals is when he expressly hears or says the word "deal." even a contract with the keepers isn't a deal. he just always can get resources easily and is willing to share when he feels like it. ³

tr!pangi is probably closer to a leader than tr!bad, in my opinion. i know that sounds crazy but hear me out. he's the one who checks in with each the members the most. he's also there strategising, planning out his cards to make the moves he wants to make. he always informs others of the moves he's gonna make, and he even got green allied with the new orange faction. okay, he's a bit busy with yaoi but tbh who isn't in this server — anyways — and he makes sure people who need things have them, even if everyone on green is basically self-sufficeint. tr!pangi has taught several of the skills he got from ls to the green members to help keep themselves safe, and is also willing to be scary back-up for whoever he can. he has the most positive relations outide the green faction than any other member, and also always makes sure to keep everyone in the loop when it concerns everyone.

tr!pangi has 20 evil exes BUT is well respected not only cause he's strong, but because he is civil and kind and people actually note this, even though he associates with and also engages in chaotic behavior just like, if more mellowed down than, tr!bad.

tr!lukey is present for everything he can be, but he's very much +9 charisma, -13 health. he's well-spoken, if not a bit sassy, in the heat of the moment, but otherwise isn't very strong or convincing. him being a little pitiful is actually quite charming to everyone, and that saves him a lot of trouble, but he isn't all innocent himself, with a history he can't remember and not-all-good intentions (though they usually stem from caring about his not-all-good teammates, or his loving friends even if the cost is a little steep). it's no surprise he's seen as expressly not tue leader, when he doesn't quite get seen as leader material in the first place. I feel he'd be good at high-stakes negotiations if he had all the info he needed, but again, green only sends one person for all the meeting cause they percieved that only one person will be seen that way by the rest of them: tr!bad.

tr!tubbo and tr!krow get away a bit more with their individuality because they don't really appear often or at the same time as tr!bad, but yellow certainly looks at them as an example of tr!bad being a "bad leader" cause he has little/no control over them. (again, hes not their leader, but honestly i don't even think they care that he's seen that way — if no one understands, they don't.) ⁴

tr!hannah is a woman. slaaayyyy. (im gonna be real she doesn't log on much, so theres not much i can say about her character, BUT from the little she's been on, i believe she'd stand with them — if maybe be a bit conflicted — but also have fun.)

over all, being individuals means a lot to green. they trust each other. theres not much they could do to break that because they know that are not only less than perfect, but actively straying away from it with every decision they make. they would rather count on each other than count their mistakes and strive for near perfection or to be as good as they can, because they know that almost nothing will break them apart besides choosing to leave of their own volition. and having that security means more to them than having a soft sort of family, cause its stronger.

in a way, green are a family, but instead of all living in the same house, eating the same food and drinking the same water, they live around the world like a network, and where one line cuts off, it's always attatched to another to keep working. yellow, from greens perspective, seems to be rooted in being yellow. the king, the royal architect, the archmage — of yellow. to green, it must seems that when all of it relies on being yellow, if you make a mistake to big, or go somewhere yellow dont want you to go... what do you have left after that?

tr!owen is the prime example in this — he said and did things yellow didn't agree with and lost everything, under the guise of being a spy. he technically, in the end, didn't get to be anything. not green, cause he was a spy for yellow, and not yellow cause they banished him with what they considered a pointless task that would keep him away. not even purple — the designation for people with no faction. at least green accepted a contract with him and he had support. cause green understands being the individual, having a goal, the need to do bad things, even if he wasn't one of green's.

im in no way expecting yellow to get it. they don't have to. that's the point! that's the whole reason they're yellow and not green. cause their customs work for them. they are amazing. a safe place for each other. a family. a shoulder to lean on. comfort and home. but on the off chance they get it one day, it would be amazing for them to all see how similar they are. how alike in nature everyone is. they're not denying that they're cruel because, honestly, they're not. its funny to say to rile people up and some of the ways they think can be questionable, but they have so many amazing similarities to green. they have a figure they can rely on for material needs, they have a figure they can rely on for political needs, they can all, at risk, seek out each other for emotional talks and chats if they so choose. they hang out for fun, they laugh and sing and dance together. they have quiet moment where knowing each other are present is all that matters.

and i'm not saying green has nothing to work on. they are all antagonistic or villains or making bad decisions. they have all done things they regret or didnt want to do knowing how they would feel about it. they've all sacrificed more than they've had for things that weren't worth it. but a little understanding goes a long way, and hopefully, something everybody has to fight against will bring then a little closer together, even if they don't always agree on everything.

¹ [thats probably one of the reasons they lack/lost respect from green, to be honest. they have a lot of perceptions, and they have to be right even when they're wrong, only cause they're a united front. of course, not all their perceptions are wrong, but in terms of a lot of facts about green, they are — so green, in turn, to make their perceptions, which is only fair to them.]

—

² [and frankly, this is why i love the separate factions, and i think they would've organically formed this way either way. either as teams or villages or whatever, all thats different is they have the distinct colors on their names tbh. it's seperate cultures naturally forming in a land that connected by nothing but dirt, rock, flora and fauna — in real life, over time they'd probably have separate languages in a few thousand years, if they didnt actively create one themselves]

—

³ [nothing to do with the realm but more so cc!bad himself: i would love to see him play a secondary, much kinder character besides !bad. cc!bad plays genuine kindness very well (with experience, of course xD) and when he puts softness into his character, even subtly, it always melts my heart. perhaps !halo, who is just a regular yet skilled guy trying his hardest. i would still like to see !halo suffer, but only for the angst, and so it feels better when he succeeds, like the way i love it when !bad succeeds cause i wanna see him suffer, hehe. (perhaps even just a time where he pretends to be someone else, but lets someone who knows him know its, to be silly >:3) extremely indulgent idea and won't happen, but would make a good premise for a one-off ir a fic, perhaps.]

—

⁴ [I CARE RAAAHHHH. my blog, grrrr. ROO ROO ROO BARK. LMAO]

#long post #like so unreasonably long #like oh my god just make friends and talk you absolute social disaster #but anyways yeah dont mind me #trsmp #the realm smp #tr!badboyhalo #tr!owen but only a bit #hes like the reason i wrote this but not like the main event at all #it was going to be about green but yellow has made green all about tr!bad somehow LMAO #thats my streamer yippee

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