#so...that would still be the '80s. what's wrong with me
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it's that time of the year where i post about the ocs from my secondary story before launching them back into the void for several months
#art tag#6139#oc: vanna#this took THREE drawings the other two were just too stiff (this isn't the Greatest but way better than before)#but i really wanted to color this fit so i just angrily sketched out a third picture which finally worked#the story doesn't really have a plot just some vague ideas for the characters#because i always forget about it for a few months and then come back to it Extremely Briefly#it is set in the modern day#well..maybe pre-pandemic...maybe like 2018 or something#uhm since they were vaguely inspired by scooby doo in the original iteration though i could put it in the late '60s if i get tired of it#though it was specifically inspired by 13 ghosts of scooby doo + the reluctant werewolf movie#so...that would still be the '80s. what's wrong with me#the original draft was like a few shorter stories of the characters getting involved in various hijinx#but it's not really like a cartoon there's overarching themes and stuff? recurring stuff like that?#none of this is about vanna specifically.#she's not the group daphne she's actually the group googie (from reluctant werewolf)#so she is the girlfriend of casey (not-shaggy) (named for casey kasem)#but she like...does more stuff than googie does. and also doesn't immediately vanish lol#also!#because of that she's kind of an outsider#like...casey and vic (not-daphne) dealt with some wacky ghost stuff at their summer job in high school#working for not-vincent-van-ghoul#who needs a new name i don't like their old name...#but also like they were friends with the other two (noah/not-fred and lola/not-velma) in high school#but vanna went to a different town so she doesn't know them until the start of the story#she only sort of knows not-vvg and calls them up b/c casey's turnign into a werewolf and she doesn't know waht to do..#also her older brother's an evil wizard. possibly.#he was actually inspired by bram from music of the vampire so he fuckin SUCKS! lmao#i do have to start making characters not based off scooby doo but instead i just keep making ones based off of more obscure characters#well bram is probably less obscure than googie + had cameos in other movies. music of the vampire is more modern than reluctant werewolf.
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sneepy cozy time....
#cats#longing to one day hopefully feel sleepy cozy like this again...#There was a pretty cool week here so I thought we had progressed closer to cool fall weather but... NO#..wrong!! It's like 80F in my room right now and was 98F outside yesterday. We get two more 'cooler' days and then#it starts going up again and will be in the high 90s possibly 100 something later this week#in my mind september should be COOOOOLLLL!!!!! or at least STARTING to get there.. Like mid 80s at the highest.#I am going to explode the world with evil wizard powers aaRGHaaHHHHHHHH#OR at least it should get down really low at night. I think thats the main thing is if it's 95 in the day and only 62 for like 3 hours in#the middle of the night then even leaving a fan in windows all night is not enough to fully cool down the house because its just not#enough cold air or cool for long enough. If it were 98 in the day but 15F outside at night then you could probably bring cool air inside al#night and your house would be at a relatively low starting point for the next days heat.#Like for example - in my apartment on a hot and sunny day. Even with every window#closed and blocked off with thick layers of reflective stuff and also not using the stove or doing anything to generate heat - the apartmen#will still go up on average about 6 - 8 degrees in one day. Peaking around 8 - 10pm night time. If I start off with the house cooled down#to 60F. then the highest it would get is 66 - 68 which is tolerable#.But if the lowest I can cool the apartment all night is still only 75F#then it's going to be 81 - 83F by the end of the day. So really it would be bearable (ISH)#for it to be warm as long as it was colder at night.#Though still the IDEAL is to not have to structure my life around envrionmental management and constantly be checking the#outdoor temperature so I can put the fans in the second that it's colder outside than it is inside and putting elaborate curtain systems#up and down at the exact right times and meal prepping 4 days in advance so I dont have to use the stove for 3 days and blah blah blah#Life in the colder weather months is so effortless and breezy in that sense. I can just have the window open all day and get natural light.#I can cook whatever I want. I can wear what I like. I can move around the house freely without needing to always#carry a fan around with me or douse myself in water.#ANYWAY.... oh if only that were me.... snuggled in a warm blanket ... a comforting wintery image...
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6, 13, and/or 28 for the music asks? :3
yayayay thank you for the ask <3
6: A song that makes you want to dance
uhh I haven’t been listening to much music to dance to lately, so I’ll go with famous last words by my chemical romance because I’ve been vibing to it a lot…
13: One of your favorite 80’s songs
does Welcome to the Room… Sara by Fleetwood Mac count? I can’t listen to that song without thinking about yttd head in hands
28: A song by an artist with a voice that you love
Against the Kitchen Floor by Will Wood, he just has a very characteristic voice and his range is insane!! I’ll never not be impressed by Will Wood’s vocals, though there’s so many artists with voices I love <3
#lemon man talks#I admittedly don’t listen to much music from before the 2000s#Fwm is the first thing that comes to mind when someone mentions music from the 60s-80s#I’m pretty sure they were still active during the 90s and maaayyybe a bit of the 2000s but I’m not a fwm specialist#I’d have to ask Len#(Hi Len sorry if I got every fwm fact in this post wrong)#Also as a singer myself I’m just. So passionate about studying artists’ vocals#And will wood is INSANE#But there’s so so many artists I love#Punched wall I LOVE MUSIC#there’s a sad lack of AJR in this post but let it be known they’re still my favorite band ever#I’ve just been in my emo phase lately so I’m mostly listening to mcr and n25#Btw negative 25 is awesome and should be more famous#I love you small emo pop band that I found by chance on Spotify <3#Their new ep comes out this week!!!!!!#Honestly the only thing keeping me alive right now#I love their music#there’s a very obvious pattern on my favorite songs by them too I’m so predictable#Ooh I like so what I lied and h4ppy t00 and do you see good in me? Yeah I fucking would#I love music ❤️ music soings they go in my ears ❤️
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just another day wasting away in margaritaville trying to figure out how the actual fuck the Grand Army of the Republic is organized. send assistance i am shaking sobbing crying in a corner
#no like. does anybody understand it please help me#i get how it’s divided#i even made an entire flow chart#but it’s the numbering i’m confused with cause none of it makes any fucking SENSE#and i don’t know know if i just don’t know how military battalions are numbered but this makes less than 0 sense even if i did know#because like. ok so for example: the 327th star corps is in the 2nd systems army. but how is that possible? why are they called the 327th?#because there are 10 systems armies; each with 2 sector armies; each with 4 corps#and if i know math (which i occasionally do) that means there are 80 corps in the entire GAR (4 for each of the 20 sector armies)#so then HOW#is there a corps in the 300s#and that’s not even the worst example#okay so we all know the 212th? our most beloved attack battalion of gold babes?#they’re in the 3rd systems army which means they should have the 5th and 6th sector armies (1st system army has 1+2 2nd systems has 3+4 etc#but then they have the 7th sky corps. and if there are 8 corps per systems army and they’re in the THIRD systems army#how do they have the 7th corps? and how are they only the 212th battalion? cause there’s 512 battalions in the first systems army ALONE!#so either it’s straight up wrong and their battalion number should be more like 1212 (in the thousands!)#or each sector/sustems army has their own numbering of battalionsthat goes from 1-512; and same for their corps?#so it would be like ‘we’re the 404th battalion of the 6th corps of the 4th systems army’?#but then that still contradicts the existence of actual corps like the 91st mobile recon corps and the 41st elite corps!#so are there two different systems of numbering it? do corps and legions and battalions all number and name their divisions differently?#i wrote so much i ran out of tags but serious am i just dumb or am i right and none of this makes sense#i spent literally 2 hours getting distracted by this conundrum today#after spending 4 hours last night understanding how the army is divided cause i was curious about what the numbering meant#LITTLE DID I KNOW I MEANT NEXT TO FUCKING NOTHING#this is what happens when i get bored smh#if anybody understands military structure and im legit just missing something PLEASE tell me i am so curious#star wars#the clone wars#andis thought geyser
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actress! reader. he has a breakdown when you die in the movie
"are you for real doing this.." you looked at your husband who was passionately typing away at his laptop, through tears by the way
"babe, YOU be for real right now. what the fuck was going on in the minds of the writers that they decided to fucking kill you off?! im gonna make sure this stupid fucking movie has 0% rotten tomatoes! ugh im so fucking mad!"
you raised your eyebrow "you do remember that this is still a movie i acted in, right?"
"doesn't matter, princess! you were the main lead so they have no business killing you off! like wheres the plot armor?? uneducated asses. dont even know that the main leads always has to live, how did they even become a writer!" he said furiously
the latest movie you filmed in has been released on every platforms. you were particularly excited about this because this was the first time you acted as a main lead and it was also based on a medieval era. but however excited you had been, gojo was a thousand times more excited than you. he always supported your dreams and saw it as his own. he showed up during almost every shooting session, looking as proud as always. hyping you up so much that even the staffs started to get annoyed
"i can tell that this movie is going to be a blockbuster because of my baby," he had beamed at you and pecked your lips lovingly. absolutely unbothered by the offended stares he got
unfortunately, he couldn't make it to the last days of shooting because of missions. for which he showed great sadness (you had to provide him selfies with your pretty outfits, so that he doesnt lose his mind) which is why he didn't know the ending and since you didnt want to spoil it to him, you kept your mouth shut.. which was maybe a wrong decision
he had taken a leave from work just to stream the movie with you. arranged a super big bowl of sweets instead of popcorn like a normal person would, made the couch all cozy and even went as far as to turn off all the lights to give this a 'theater' vibe (hes planning to open one at his home to stream your movies)
at the start of the movie, he seemed really excited and happy. everytime you appeared at the big screen of his 80 inch tv, he would go 'thats my baby omg' with heart eyes like a fanboy. which he was to be honest
but as the movie progressed and you showed signs of, well dying, his heart sanked. and when you did die, he horrifiedly muttered 'what the fuck..' repeatedly and started bawling his eyes out while hugging you tightly
which brings you here with him writing a review of your just released movie and rating it 0
"this is not enough," he muttered. rubbing his face with his hand, he said "i gotta sue them for making this absolutely atrocious movie and for emotional damage."
"aw toru," you somewhat jutted your lips "did you really not like it?" you said dejectedly
his furrowed brows relaxed at your tone. he pulled you closer to him and pecked your forehead. "maybe i am overreacting a bit," he said sheepishly "but seeing you... die like this, even if its just in a movie, made my heart sink to my stomach." you noticed he used the word die fearfully and with great reluctance
you batted your eyelashes at him, innocently "oh.. but im still with you, no?"
he smiled sadly at your words, you really have no idea about the hold you have over him
"well yeah... but no offense to you, im never watching this movie again." he firmly said with furrowed brows
you giggled at your silly husband and flicked his forehead "none taken."
extra :
"ugh im feeling nauseous because i keep getting reminded of those scenes, I might really puke."
"babe i know you love me but thats only because of those damn sweets."
bday post:') not proofread !
#gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru x y/n#gojo satoru x you#gojo satoru fluff#gojo x you#gojo x y/n#gojo x reader fluff#gojo fluff#satoru gojo x reader#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen x reader
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best seat in the house.
blame it on the moustache.
eddie diaz x female reader (nickname - blue)
warnings - smut. cursing. I think the word moustache is in this about 500 times.
word count - 3k
authors note - save a horse, ride a… firefighter. we all know I go feral for a pornstache, so it was only a matter of time before this happened.
masterlist. inbox.

You’re going insane.
You’ve been away for two months, on a placement course with the academy. As a trainee EMT, you’ve been lucky enough to earn your place in the 118, the one firehouse that every firefighter and paramedic in Los Angeles covets. With that comes training days and practical exams and occasionally, a two month placement that you’re scored and assessed on.
You passed with flying colours, of course - no one doubted you for a second. You’d expected to cruise back into your firehouse after some time away like you’d never left, everything exactly the same as it was.
Except, you’re going insane.
Eddie Diaz has a moustache.
A full on 80s inspired pornstar brush of a moustache.
It suits his face beautifully, accentuating his dark features and those big brown eyes. It’s made him ten times more attractive - which you didn’t think was even possible. You’ve had a harmless crush on him ever since your first day, and the moustache seems to have accelerated it tenfold.
“Are you okay?”
A heavy arm is slung around you, pulling you into the side of a solid body. You know who it is based on his cologne. You relax into him, resting your head on his shoulder.
“Yeah, I’m good.”
He looks at you skeptically, eyebrows raised.
“Blue.”
“Buck.”
“You’ve been kinda spacey these last couple of days. What’s the deal?”
“There’s no deal. Just tired, I guess.”
“You’d tell me if something was wrong though, right?”
You look up at him, heart melting at the genuine concern in his eyes.
“Of course I would,” you reassure. “Love you.”
“Love you,” he mumbles into your hair, pressing a kiss onto your head. “Even if you are stubborn as hell.”
You chuckle, burrowing further into his side and getting comfortable on the couch. You both sit like that for a while, praying the alarms don’t sound so you can enjoy your peace a little while longer.
“Hey, Blue?”
The source of all of your stress comes striding up the stairs, all bright eyed and gorgeous.
“Eddie.”
He takes a seat on the other side of you, pressing his thigh into yours. You will yourself to take a deep breath and calm down, before he feels all of the tension in your body.
“Chris has been counting down the days until you came back. You wanna come over for dinner tonight? He’s missed you like crazy.”
“I’d love to,” you breathe, grinning at him like an idiot.
He grins right back, squeezing your thigh quickly. You determinedly ignore the way electricity zips through your veins at the action.
“Alright, I’m gonna workout for a while. Let’s hope we don’t get a call when I’m mid weight set,” he laughs, winking at you cheekily before heading down the stairs.
Heat blooms across your chest as you bite your lip, trying to stop yourself from beaming from ear to ear. As soon as he’s gone, Buck grabs both of your shoulders, shaking you like a maniac.
“Oh. My. God.”
“What? Buck, what? Jesus, what?”
You grip onto his wrists, willing him to still his movements.
“That’s what’s gotten into you! It’s Eddie!”
You choke on your words, struggling to get any out - so you punch his leg as hard as you can, giggling when he yelps. Buck swings his arm around your neck, catching you in a headlock and pulling you into his lap. All you can do is try to wriggle out, smacking any of his body parts you can reach. Eventually you separate when you both crash onto the floor, laughing and out of breath.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” he pants, lying next to you on the ground.
“Tell you what, Evan?”
“That you’re in love with Eddie.”
Your eyes go wide as your jaw drops open, alarm bells going off in your mind.
“Woah- that’s, yeah, uh… no.”
“Okay, not love, then. But you’ve got the hots for him. Big time.”
You sigh in defeat, head dropping back onto the wooden floor.
“He’s a handsome man.”
“I know,” he agrees. “All of us would agree with you on that.”
You lie in silence for a moment, praying that no one comes up the stairs and finds you here. Buck intertwines his fingers with yours, squeezing reassuringly.
“It’s the moustache,” you whisper. “The goddamn moustache.”
“Oh, you like a man with some facial hair?” he smirks, propping himself up on his elbow.
You sit up, leaning back against the sofa and dusting yourself off.
“I do. I like you better when you have a little bit of stubble going on.”
“Noted,” he winks. “You should tell him.”
“Huh?”
“That you like the moustache. He’ll appreciate it.”
“Yeah. No. Not gonna happen.”
“You never know… something good might come of it.”
“Evan. Are you hearing yourself?”
“Loud and clear, Bluey. Listen, you’re a beautiful girl. You tell Eddie you like his moustache… he tells you he likes your entire face… and boom. Fireworks.”
You throw your head back as you cackle, laughing with your full chest.
“You’re ridiculous.”
“I’m just saying! You never know what might happen.”
“And I’m just saying… you’re ridiculous.”
You’re startled suddenly by the bells ringing and lights flashing, both of you jumping up and running down the stairs towards the truck.
“Saved by the bell,” Buck grins, winking at you.
Saved by the bell indeed.
✵ ✵ · ✵ ��� * · ✵
An evening with Chris is exactly what you need.
Only… that’s not what you get.
“He got invited to a birthday party at the movies last minute. I didn’t have the heart to tell him you were coming over. I should have called, Blue - I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” you soothe, kicking off your shoes by the door like you’ve done so many times before. “I brought wine, anyway. Just in case.”
“You’re the best,” he chuckles, heading to the kitchen to get some glasses. “You and I can catch up tonight. I want to know all about your assessments.”
“It wasn’t that exciting, really. Lots of time in a classroom listening to some old dude talking.”
You get comfy on the couch, tucking your legs underneath yourself and happily accepting the glass of wine that Eddie holds out to you. He takes the cushion next to you, turning so his body’s facing yours.
“Did they let you drive the ambulance?”
“Yes! We had driving lessons, which were hilarious. There were some people there I wouldn’t trust to drive a golf cart, never mind an ambulance with a dying patient in.”
He cackles, knocking his knee into yours. All you can think about is how good he smells, all woody and musky and masculine.
You launch into a story about an emergency amputation on a plastic doll to distract yourself, which ends in both of you in fits of laughter, tears dripping down your faces.
The bottle of wine goes down too smoothly over the course of the evening, both of you a little tipsy. You’ve inched closer, legs tangled as you lean into each others sides. You can’t stop giggling, warm and flushed and happy to be in one another’s company.
Eddie’s phone vibrates, both of you scrambling around the cushions to find it. Eventually, he finds it, both of you chuckling at the theatrics of it all.
“Hello? Oh, hi Jenna. Yeah, sure. No worries, that’s fine. Give me a call if he needs anything, alright? Okay, tell him I say goodnight. Thanks, Jenna.”
You raise your eyebrows in question.
“Chris is going to stay the night at Cameron’s. His mom was just checking it’s okay.”
“He’s so grown up now,” you sigh. “Where does the time go?”
“I wish I had the answer to that,” he says as he throws his phone onto the coffee table. “I’ve got no idea.”
You lean against the back of the couch, resting your head on top of your arms. Eddie stares at you with the softest look on his face that you’ve ever seen, mirroring your posture.
“We all missed you,” he murmurs. “The 118 wasn’t the same with you gone.”
“I missed you. All of you. I was counting down the days until I could come back.”
He smiles at you all gentle and honey sweet, and you’re surprised you don’t melt into a liquid on his nice couch. Your heart is thumping against your chest, working overtime to keep you upright and breathing.
It’s never been like this with Eddie. Or maybe it has. You’ve always been able to tamper down your feelings, keep them buried and in check - so much so that a beautiful friendship has blossomed over time. You don’t want to ruin what you’ve built by admitting you’ve got some silly school girl crush on him and his moustache. It’d kill you if you lost him - Christopher too.
“Have you done something different?”
His buttery voice breaks you out of your daydream.
“Hmm?”
“You look… different. In a good way. Beautiful.”
He’s rambling, trying to cover his tracks so it doesn’t look like he’s coming onto you. You smile, shaking your head.
“Thank you, but I don’t think so. Oh wait, I have a new blush on my cheeks. Maybe it’s that?”
“Suits you.”
You bite your lip to stop yourself from grinning like the Cheshire Cat.
“If I ask you a question, will you be honest with me, Blue?”
“Always.”
“What do you think of the moustache?”
Oh no. You pause, trying to formulate an appropriate answer quickly.
“I… like it.”
“You don’t sound like you do,” he chuckles.
“No, I do. I like it.”
“I thought you promised to be honest.”
His hand is resting on your knee, settled and comfortable. You’re not sure when he put it there, but you’re not complaining.
“I am being honest.”
“Look me in the eye, then.”
You hadn’t even realised you’d been avoiding him, too busy worrying about keeping your heart rate steady. You finally catch his gaze, those big brown eyes staring straight into your soul.
“Blue?”
“Eds?”
Your voices are low and cautious, careful not to disrupt the atmosphere you’ve created. You’re both wine drunk and warm, giddy off of the happiness of being reunited with one of your best friends.
“Tell me what you really think about the moustache. I trust you to be honest - if you think it’s terrible, I’ll shave it off right now.”
“Don’t shave it,” you say a little too quickly. “I meant it when I said I like it. Promise.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. You look good. Fuck, you look good.”
The wine is making you too honest, but it’s too late to turn back now. He wanted the truth… he’ll get the truth.
“Oh. You like it, don’t you?”
He’s got this cocky smirk on his face, arrogant and self assured. You wish you hated it, but you don’t. Unfortunately.
“So what if I like a man with facial hair? Is that a crime?”
“It’s not a crime,” he laughs. “Just didn’t think the pornstache would be your kind of thing.”
“Well I didn’t think it’d be yours either, but here we are.”
He looks at you with nothing but mischief in his eyes, gaze raking up and down your body slowly. A shiver runs down your spine, the hairs on your arms standing up in anticipation. You sit in the quiet for a moment, waiting for Eddie to make the next move - you’re worried that your raging crush means that you’re misreading the atmosphere of the room.
“You wanna take it for a spin?”
Time stands still for a moment, both of you holding your breath.
“I- I- you… Eds, I- what?”
He chuckles all low and slow, like butter wouldn’t melt.
“You wanna take it for a spin?”
You’re looking at him with your jaw hinged open, blinking like a deer in headlights. When you don’t say anything, Eddie speaks again.
“You wanna sit on it?”
You’re quite convinced you’re in another dimension, catapulted into an alternate reality all of a sudden. An alternate reality where Eddie Diaz is… asking you to sit on his face?
“I- what, um… where has that come from?”
You’re only now noticing the blush on his cheeks, unable to tell if it’s from you and the close proximity or the bottle of wine that now sits empty on the coffee table.
“You like the moustache. And I like you.”
He looks almost sheepish, like he didn’t mean to confess out loud.
“I… do like the moustache. And I do like you.”
He grins at you all bold and beautiful, and you can’t help but grin right back.
“I had a dream last month that you sat on my face,” he murmurs, leaning in so he’s talking right into your ear. “I can’t get it out of my head. It’s like it plays on repeat.”
You clear your throat, attempting to get words out.
“Tell me more.”
“It was the hottest thing I’d ever seen in my life. It felt so real, Blue. I swear I could taste you on my tongue when I woke up.”
You’re almost gasping for breath, heart working overtime in your ribcage as you pant.
“Well I guess I better… how did you say it? Take it for a spin?”
He quirks an eyebrow at you to ask are you sure?, which has you smirking at him with nothing but deviance in your eyes.
“It’d be rude not to, Eddie. Seeing as you asked so nicely. And seeing as the universe is sending you psychic, prophetic, sexy dreams about me.”
He doesn’t waste another second, shuffling down the couch so he’s lying flat. When you don’t move, he props himself up on his elbows, looking at you expectantly.
“You can’t sit on my face from all the way over there, Bluebird.”
Laughing in disbelief, you crawl your way up his body, stopping when you’re straddling his waist. You lean down, pausing so you’re nose to nose as you breathe each other in.
“Can I kiss you?”
He looks confused that you’re asking but nods eagerly, softness written all over his face. You kiss him gently, carefully, sweetly. You’re figuring each other out, not wanting to push any boundaries too far too soon.
Eddie slips his tongue into your mouth eagerly, hips bucking up into yours. It’s all teeth and lust carnal need, years of built up longing bubbling to the surface. When you’re both so out of breath you’re lightheaded, you pull away, pecking his lips quickly before standing up to shimmy your shorts and panties down your legs. Eddie looks drunk - not on the wine, but on you.
You climb back on top of him, shuffling up his chest so you’re hovering over his face. You’re completely sure you want this, but there’s a tiny little inkling of anxiety that’s spreading through your veins, lighting up your nerves.
“I’ll take care of you,” he promises, looking up at you with nothing but love in his eyes. “Always.”
“I know,” you smile, gently moving a stray strand of hair away from his eyes. “Show me what you’ve got, Diaz.”
With that, you quit the hovering and sit down exactly where he wants you, throwing caution to the wind.
Eddie takes it slow at first, taking mental notes. It’s all careful and loving and considered, both of you holding back. He’s kitten licking, sucking gently, savouring the taste of you while he can. Eventually, you get a little impatient, accidentally bucking your hips into his face.
“S’that what you want?” he mumbles from underneath you. “Use me, Blue. Take what you need.”
He doesn’t have to tell you twice, as you instantly grind your hips forward. He slips his tongue inside you, your back arching when the gorgeous slope of his nose bumps against your clit.
“Oh, fuck,” you breathe, tangling your fingers into his hair to use as leverage. “Right there, Eds. Keep doing that.”
He does exactly as he’s told, curling his tongue just right as you rock forwards and backwards, taking control of the situation. He’s groaning beneath you, clearly enjoying this just as much as you are. When you let out a particularly pornographic moan, his hips are bucking up into the air, desperate for any kind of friction.
“Close,” you mumble, fingers tightening in his hair. “So close, Eddie.”
His hold on your thighs only gets firmer, his grip bruising as he digs his fingertips into your flesh. As if he knows you need a little push, he smacks your ass hard with an open palm, the unexpected jolt of it sending you flying into your climax.
Eddie works you through it, tongue never ceasing its movements until you’re tugging him away and shuffling down so you can collapse against his chest. He wraps his arms around you, drawing patterns on any skin he can reach to calm your racing heart. There’s not an inch of space between you, bodies plastered together on his couch.
“You okay?” he’s asking all muffled into the top of your head.
“Never better.”
You feel his laugh rumble through your bones, making you chuckle.
“So… you don’t want me to shave the moustache?”
“You’re annoying,” you grumble, looking up at him with stars in your eyes. “But don’t you dare.”
“Yes ma’am,” he teases, pressing a kiss into your hair. “Loud and clear.”
You’re not sure how long the two of you lie all tangled up on the couch together. It doesn’t matter.
Tonight, you have all the time in the world.

#eddie diaz smut#eddie diaz x reader fluff#eddie diaz x reader#eddie diaz fluff#eddie diaz x reader smut#eddie diaz x you#eddie diaz x y/n#eddie diaz x female reader#eddie diaz imagine#eddie diaz fic#911 smut#911 imagine#911 x reader#911 x reader smut#evan buckley x reader#evan buckley x reader fluff#911 x you#911 fic#911 fanfic#eddie diaz fanfic
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okay so let's just recap what happened. maddie tells buck he should try making new friends because he's not coping well with his only friend eddie being gone. so buck tries to make friends with eddie's replacement, looking like a complete loser in the process, due to he doesn't know how to make friends and eddie's just a freak disguised as a pretty cool and normal dude. they manage to settle on an activity that eddie should probably not haunt (drinking) except for that buck is really intent on making sure eddie haunts everything and everyone so he spends the entire time talking about how he is eddie's princess and eddie is soooo good at stuff and has never done anything wrong in his life and he's so much fun, let's play this drinking game he taught me! ravi who is sick of this forcibly inserts tommy in his place and gets the hell out of there before buck can say eddie's name a billionth time. tommy doesn't really get what he's supposed to be doing there and doesn't give a shit until he learns that eddie is gone, upon which he Turns It On and they end up going back to. well. (tommy voice) eddie's house. buck has not unpacked a single thing and is never even there so they have tequila-drunk sex on a bare mattress without sheets or anything, there is definitely no lube available so it's definitely dry as fuck, and afterwards buck (drunk, just had sex) still has the wherewithal to change into his sleepytime shirt (he doesn't take his watch off though) before falling asleep, so it probably isn't all that athletic either. in the morning buck wakes up in an empty (sheetsless) bed and is like Haha okay he probably just left! but no. tommy's in eddie's kitchen and he has cooked 1 pound of bacon and 17 eggs and an entire fruit salad and chopped up celery and carrots and also cut 4 bagels AND brought champagne. to celebrate their dry ex sex they had on buck's bare mattress in eddie's house, which by the way he thinks it's super weird that they're in eddie's house, but hee hee eddie's gone so he can ignore it and GET IN THERE!!!!! like he's been waiting to do for months apparently. then for some reason when buck asks him if he's not afraid buck will break his heart anymore he decides the best response is to be like WELL YEAH NOW THAT YOUR BEST FRIEND HAS MOVED TO A DIFFERENT STATE. YOU KNOW, BECAUSE OF HIS FAMILY FALLING APART DUE TO HIS GRIEF. YEAH HE'S OUT OF THE WAY NOW SO IT'S ALL GOOD OVER HERE. HOW ABOUT SOME BUBBLY? and buck, understandably, is weirded out, and also freaked out, but even he is like. Ummmm. first of all eddie rented this house. and he's straight. so you're wrong about my feelings for him, which neither of those things address. also i don't have feelings for you btw. and then tommy walks out, leaving buck with approximately 80 united states dollars' worth of breakfast, so he can call an uber from eddie's front porch. and he has to sit there and wait for his uber, and probably he's thinking, Wow if i told buck i was getting an uber right now, buck would probably say, "me and eddie got an uber once!"
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MOANER, GROANER, OR WHIMPERER ?
what sounds do the seventeen members make in bed ?
NSFW CONTENT ! MDNI !
a/n: GUYS i am so sorry i haven't written in so long ╯︿╰ i lose motivation for things VERY easily. anywho,,, if anyone has any requests or anything feel free to send them in ! ( just be prepared for me to take my time to respond ϵ( ‘Θ’ )϶ )
MOANER:
jeonghan:
when i tell you this man has the PRETTIEST moans i mean it. borderline angelic. every noise that comes out of his mouth has you on the verge of orgasm LITERALLY. he's upstaging you i'm sorry !
joshua:
the things i would do to hear him moaning.... 28:50 of the youngji interview is EMBEDDED in my brain. def more on the quiet side, his moans are pretty low in volume, but he is for SURE right next to your ear cuz he knows how much his moans affect you.
jun:
pathetic moans. PATHETIC. loud, whiny, GUTTURAL moans. he also has no shame. and i mean that. does not care how loud he's being. he has to let you know how good you make him feel, who cares about who hears ? also def makes those ah- ah- ah- sounds before he cums
minghao:
hao's moans are like josh's, low in volume but close enough for you to hear. gives me the vibes of someone who doesn't make much noise in bed, he prefers to focus on your blabbering, but when his sounds grace your ears, it is HEAVENLY. ( his moans are borderline whimpers too just saying )
seungkwan:
DEEP. DEEP. SO DEEP. yk that one good to me performance where he said "make some noise" in his deep ass voice ? yeah, that's his tone in bed. moans coming straight from the chest LAWDDDDDD. was pretty shy at first when it came to making noise, but after seeing how badly it affected you ( because who wouldn't go insane hearing them ), he just goes AT IT. unless he's in sub mode and is borderline sobbing
GROANER:
seungcheol:
bro. words could not describe how hot this man sounds ( i would know we're actually married ). GUTTERAL groaning. genuinely sounds like he is working out >︿< lets out a groan every time he pulls out, followed by a whimper when he shoves his cock back in :/
wonwoo:
practically inaudible with how deep his groans are. all you would be able to hear is this deep grumble. rarely likes making sounds in bed as he prefers to be all ears for your moans, but hey, sometimes good sex makes a man whimper okay there's nothing wrong with that :3
vernon:
kinda like jun, in the aspect that his groans have a pathetic tilt to them. every sound he makes, no matter how hard he tries to keep them in, just ends up sounding absolutely RUINED. im talking you'd think he was crying from how desperate he sounds ( maybe he is who knows ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )
chan:
he's right on the barrier between groans and gasps. OMLLLL HIS LITTLE GASP WHEN HE FIRST SLIPS IN !!!!!!!!!!! no shame either he wants to let the whole world know he's getting the best pussy of his LIFE. anime girl ~gah~ kinda noises IM SORRY
WHIMPERER:
jihoon:
dooooont care what you think. he WHIMPERS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! his whimpers are very low in volume however, he knows that if the guys ever found out the little noises he makes for you he would be a goner. tries his hardest to hold the whines back, much to your dismay, but at least then you get the gorgeous sight of him biting his lip till it bleeds (/▽\)
seokmin:
man does not care how embarrassing his sounds are he NEEDS you to know how good you feel. he is the EPITONE of whimpers. men be afraid to moan in their girls ear, but seokmin is sobbing out "f-fuck oh m- oh my god- 's good, 's good-" and other barely audible curses :3
mingyu:
his whimpers are WET sorrynotsorry. im saying he's borderline drooling. dumb puppy can't help it if your cunt feels so good :( sobs, cries, just the most desperate and shaky words tumbling from his mouth ( if he can still form words is a different story ).
ALL OF THE ABOVE:
soonyoung:
does not give a FUCK what noise he is making, he's just going for it. somehow sounds like whimpers, cries and growls all in one ?? also yes 80% of the time he is growling but are we suprised. just says any word that comes to his mind too. bro does nawt understand why people hold in their moans... if it feels good, it feels good you know ?
not proof-read ! lmk if there's any mistakes (づ ̄ 3 ̄)づ
#seventeen#seventeen x reader#seventeen smut#svt#svt x reader#svt smut#scoups x reader#scoups smut#jeonghan x reader#jeonghan smut#joshua x reader#joshua smut#junhui x reader#junhui smut#hoshi x reader#hoshi smut#wonwoo x reader#wonwoo smut#woozi x reader#woozi smut#minghao x reader#minghao smut#mingyu x reader#mingyu smut#dk x reader#dk smut#seungkwan x reader#seungkwan smut#vernon x reader#vernon smut
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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
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Steve acts on instinct.
There’s this guy in all black walking in front of him, he’s too busy looking down at his phone to notice, but Steve doesn’t trust that lamppost. He’s been going for daily runs, he likes to keep it simple during the off-season, and that post has been getting more rickety every day. Now it’s swaying dangerously in the wind and he knows it’s about to tumble.
There’s no time to call out to the guy, so Steve just plows forward and tackles him out of the way.
They fall in a messy heap and Steve unfortunately lands heavily on top.
“Holy shit! What the— ugh!” The guy heaves in pain and Steve hurries to scramble off of him.
“Sorry, that post was about to fall on you, man. You alright?”
Pieces of grass stick to the guy’s long hair as he takes stock of Steve and what happened. With a labored breath, he surprisingly jokes, “Guess I’m lucky the best football tackler alive happened to be right behind me.”
It’s sarcastic as shit but Steve smiles with a tug of amusement as he offers his hand. “Baseball, actually.”
“You’re in the wrong league, man,” he lets Steve pull him to his feet and groans on the way up. “Well, nice to meet you, Baseball, you pack a hell of a first impression. I’m Eddie.”
Steve would appreciate his ability to joke so soon after taking a hit, but people are starting to gather around. There’s already phones pointed at them that probably caught the whole thing on camera. Steve’s used to public attention by now, knows the press is going to have a field day with this and he hates causing a scene, but he wants to make sure Eddie is okay.
“Just Steve is good. You wanna…? This way,” he gestures toward the sidewalk and thankfully, Eddie seems just as eager to get out of there too, shuffling next to Steve as they round the corner.
He’s wearing so much metal jewelry, it’s like a costume, the jingle jangle of his every step accentuating how shaken up he seems. They get far enough behind a building and Steve stops to have a real look at him and… well he’s interesting to look at.
It’s like he hopped off the album cover of an 80s rock band, or one of Steve’s Bon Jovi posters that he hid under his bed in high school. Way too much leather and way too much hair for the California sun, all disheveled with grass and dirt.
“You sure you’re okay? Here, you got a little…” Steve’s hand hovers until Eddie nods that it’s okay from him to pluck the grass from his hair and lightly brush the dust from his shoulders. Eddie watches him the whole time, his eyes big and dark, an intensity in them that Steve can’t quite read but he can feel. “Didn’t hit your head or anything, did you?”
Steve lowers his hands, stepping back a little when he realizes how close they are. Eddie’s eyes follow him, a slight quirk to his lips that makes Steve feel the heat of the sun a little warmer on his face.
“I’m touched by your concern, sweetheart, but my brain has been through worse damage than a little bump.”
Steve frowns at the ladder, but the first bit definitely makes him feel the heat. He’s admittedly a bit out of practice but he can still recognize a come on. One that he definitely invited with all the touching and indulgent looks.
Then Eddie starts profusely thanking him for the whole ordeal, asking to treat him somewhere nearby for lunch. It’s not that Steve doesn’t want to, he’s very interested actually, and thankful that out of all the jewelry Eddie’s sporting, there’s no wedding ring. That’s why he’s reluctant because he’s all sweaty at the moment. Not to mention, he didn’t finish his run yet.
“Surely saving my life was enough cardio,” Eddie jokes lightly and Steve snorts.
“I saved you from a minor concussion, maybe,” and okay he’s gotta accept now.
The place is small and unassuming, burgers and sodas type joint. Steve’s likely to be recognized there, which he doesn’t mind meeting fans in public just preferably not now, it might be jarring for Eddie.
He heads for the booth tucked in the back corner, the most private looking spot that Steve had his eyes on too. They get a round of sodas from the waitress and right away, Eddie starts thanking him again.
“I noticed that lamppost wobbling days ago,” Steve sparks a conversation instead of accepting any more thanks, “I was planning to let it fall on me so I could sue the shit out of the city.”
He’s pleasantly startled by the big cackle that gets out of Eddie, “Any chance to stick it to the man. I admire that.”
“‘Course I would’ve really stuck it to ‘em and donated it back to the community,” Steve adds.
“Giving the people’s money back to the people, imagine Big Brother’s horror. Noble guy.”
Eddie seems to bubble with contagious delight that doesn’t match his whole leather and chains thing at all, but it fits into the somewhat magic of him. It's a wonder to Steve.
“Do I know you from somewhere?” Eddie ventures, a glint of recognition in his eyes that Steve’s seen a thousand times. He doesn’t ping Eddie as much of a sports guy and he’s not vain enough to assume everyone knows who he is. Eddie’s probably seen him while flipping the channel past ESPN or something. Or maybe an ad for that Netflix thing he did documenting last year’s season.
“I think I’d definitely remember you.”
Steve didn’t mean it as a come-on, just that Eddie’s appearance really isn’t forgettable, but he can tell by the wicked little grin Eddie sports that it was taken as one. Steve likes that even better.
“Have you ever modeled, or anything? You’ve got the looks for it.”
Biting back a smile of his own, Steve shakes his head. “I bet you say that to everyone who saves your life.”
“None of them were half as good looking." That sounds concerning but Steve’s distracted by Eddie swirling his straw in his drink, regarding him with a long look. “Really though, I just feel like I’ve seen you before.”
Steve’s done a few covers of Sports Illustrated, but he doubts Eddie has ever picked up a copy of that, so he shrugs. “Must’ve been in your dreams.”
Eddie laughs softer this time. “You trying to sweep me off my feet or something?”
“Already did.” Steve leans back, enjoying the way Eddie’s eyes follow him.
Conversation sparks and it never really dies out. Eddie just grabs topics out of thin air, talking about the city and what they like to do and movies and his amazement that Steve knows all about D&D because he’s a nerd magnet. Eddie’s personality spills through everything he says like it can’t be contained. He’s talkative in a good way, not to a point where Steve can’t get a word in. He listens intently, has a way of putting all his attention onto Steve like he’s the most interesting person he’s ever spoken to.
It’s surprisingly easy to relax. Not because Eddie has a super calming presence or anything, his energy is just all-encompassing, it’s hard for Steve not to get sucked in and hang on to every word he says. It’s one of the rare times in public that he’s not hyper-aware of everyone around him and too paranoid of having a photo snapped and taken out of context to even enjoy himself.
That happens a lot, being one of the only professional athletes who’s open about his sexuality. The media is extremely invasive with his private life. If he’s seen with any guy friend, there’s a whole press storm about Steve Harrington’s “secret beau” within the hour. It’s ridiculous and he tries so hard to keep his lovelife under wraps that maybe he’s been neglecting it entirely, at least that’s what Robin says.
Of course, that’s when his phone lights up with a message from her. His heart sinks a little when he sees the title of the article she sent to him. He quickly shoots her a text and locks his phone without reading it.
“Everything alright?” Eddie notices the shift in Steve’s mood right away.
“Yeah just,” he sighs, bracing for the inevitable part when Eddie realizes Steve isn’t worth the hassle of all this, “Someone filmed us earlier and now it’s all over the press. I’m really sorry, I totally get it if—”
“Nah, don’t worry about it, it’s fine. I figured that would happen,” Eddie brushes it off, but Steve shakes his head.
“I don’t think you understand, it’s—”
“Wanna bet?” Eddie smirks for some reason, “I’m fine with it, I promise.”
He tosses a chip into his mouth and picks right back up with the story he was telling.
Steve is stunned for a moment, wary that maybe Eddie doesn’t fully grasp how deep this goes. But he stays there with Steve, seemingly thrilled to keep talking with him even when a family comes in and keeps staring their way, obviously building up the courage to come over and ask for a picture. Eddie’s acting like Steve’s the only person in the room and that’s enough to assure Steve that he’s really fine with it.
He’s so locked into Eddie, he barely registers when the older son from the family’s table finally wanders over and asks for a picture.
Steve is in the middle of wiping his face with a napkin, about to greet him when suddenly, Eddie pops up and asks Steve to excuse him for a minute.
“C’mon little man, let’s do it,” he says and much to Steve’s confusion, the teen excitedly goes with Eddie to his family’s table.
Steve watches, utterly baffled, as they start snapping photos and expressing what big fans they are and Eddie takes it with such bravado, laughing and chatting like he’s with a group of friends.
What the— Steve grabs his phone, opening the article Robin sent him at lightning speed.
At first, he wonders how the press was able to find out Eddie’s full name so quickly, then he sees the words "troubled rockstar" and "recovering star" so many times, it becomes abundantly clear.
Oh.
He’s not so worried about the troubled part, everyone has their shit and he doesn’t read into any of it. Those are Eddie’s stories to tell Steve if he chooses, not some tabloid. But the rockstar part connects a lot of dots that have come up in the last couple of hours since meeting Eddie and—
Yeah, just. Oh.
Part 2
#what if they’re both secretly famous and clueless about each other#this is called ‘Upstaged’#part two soon#steddie#eddie munson#steve harrington#steddie fic#stranger things#steddie ficlet#rockstar eddie munson#baseball player steve harrington#famous steve harrington#meet cute#saved your life trope#famous eddie munson#rueswriting
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say yes to heaven
how spencer and you deal (or don't deal) with the fact that he doesn’t want a baby anymore after coming home from prison, and you really do.
MDNI | angst
word count: 2226 warnings & tags & stuff: bau!reader, avoidant reader, avoidant spencer, no happy ending (wtf), reader wants a baby, one line about reader not having a certain religious belief, they like almost have sex, spencer undresses reader, lots of talk about a condom, they dont really fight at all?, very underdeveloped/bad description of quantum immortality author's note: heyyyyy guyss whats up..... this is a different vibe to my regular stuff and i fear it may be really ooc?? i don't know how to feel but i literally have to post or i'll go even more crazy sooo here we are!! have a delightful day, let me know your thoughts if you have any, ily!!!
Antique shops, you and Spencer have decided, are the hidden gems of this nation yet to be appreciated enough by the general public.
Each town or city you visit is bound to have one, and going to them has become a little celebratory tradition. In the early mornings after cases are solved, right before the plane ride home, you take a look around. You’re typically the first and only ones in the store, wandering with intertwined hands and sipping on ‘2 extra foamy cappuccinos with an additional shot of espresso, please’ and occasionally, but not necessarily, choosing something to take back to D.C.
You’ve been trying your absolute hardest to fill your home to the brim– sometimes with objects, and other times with words, or touch, or the ever so valuable and fleeting concept of shared time– in effort to replace what had been lost in that three month long period when it was completely devoid of tangible, fresh love.
It’s today you’re wandering through a quaint, very cluttered shop in western Oregon, the Pacific visible from the store’s windows.
Wheels up in an hour. Don’t be late. Hotch’s text buzzes in your pocket, but you barely glance at it– there’s something about the Oregon coast that reaches into your heart and gives it a gentle massage, enveloping you in a refreshing lack of urgency.
Spencer, in his own peaceful world, is staring at a tall wall of books. He reaches out to pick up a dusty rendition of Moby Dick, carefully cracking it open to the first few pages to check the publication date, brow scrunching as he reads. You go to peer over his arm to check as well, when something catches the corner of your eye. You let go of his hand to inspect.
A bassinet. Dark wood, surface polished to a faint sheen, with intricate little waves engraved on the sides, like the ocean’s misty outreach had come all the way into the shop and placed this here for you to see.
You weren’t exactly sure when this now familiar ache had started; this deep, internal desire felt in your stomach for a little hand to be gripped around your pointer and for tiny onesies to fill your laundry basket, but you’re sure, with every fiber of your being, that you want it to be there.
“Spence,” you say softly, voice jarring in the otherwise stillness of the shop. “Come look.” He carefully closes the book and puts it back where it was and pads over, looking down at the bassinet. His eyebrows raise slightly.
“Wow. It looks like it was made in the 80s, maybe even earlier. You won’t find any level of detailing more recently than that, it’s too labor intensive for modern production methods. Good find.”
“I know. Should we get it?” you ask, biting a smile. He quickly meets your eyes, brow raising slightly.
“Do you want to?” he asks, voice even.
“I mean, I just think it’s really cute, with the waves and stuff.” you say bashfully, nudging it with your toe so it rocks back and forth. Spencer swallows, adam's apple bobbing.
“Yeah, I just…” Spencer hesitates. “I don't think we’d be able to bring it on the jet. It would probably snap in half if we held it in the wrong way,” he says, making your brain race even though he hasn’t said a single thing that should cause it to do so.
“Oh.”
You blink.
“No, yeah, you’re totally right. It’s too inconvenient. You should get that copy of Moby Dick instead. That edition looked cool, with the forward explaining all the names,” you say gently, pushing a smile, nudging him back towards the shelf. He goes, shooting you one last glance as you move to observe a few clocks hanging on the wall.
Spencer doesn’t reach for your hand again when he comes back.
…
The house is quiet when you arrive back home, hours later. Spencer sets his bag down by the door, and yours goes next to his to be dealt with later.
Exhaustion from the case is heavy in your limbs; the long flight and the sleepless nights are seeping into your bones, but Spencer seems perfectly intent upon kissing it better. You rest your forehead on his chest, exhaling softly, contentedly, as he presses kiss after kiss into your hair. He gently rests his hands on your waist and pushes you against the door– not as an act of dominance, like if someone were viewing you two from afar might assume, but one of simple convenience.
His hand reaches up to tilt your chin to the position he wants. Before leaning in to your neck, he pauses.
“Are you sure you don’t just want to go to bed?” he asks. “You didn't sleep last night.” You shake your head, giving his cheek a small peck of your own.
“It’s one of those tireds where I can’t even think about sleep ever again.”
A small smile grows on his face.
“I bet I can change that,” Spencer offers, knuckles skimming over your waist. You smile and let him tug you upstairs to your room and guide your hips to sit on the bed. His hand cups the side of your jaw, as always, lips moving to press against yours in a soft, affectionate display of his adoration. His other hand moves to your waist, squeezing, and you shiver a little in response, making him hum gently.
His hands go underneath the hem of your top. “Okay?” he asks. You nod, lifting your arms to help. His eyes take their time tracing over you, but never in a way that couldn't be defined as sweet. His hand leaves your cheek and goes to the bedside table, sliding open the drawer. It draws toward the front left corner, as it always does, when it pauses. He turns to look at you, hesitating.
You, whose legs are now pulled up to your chest, chin resting on them. You stare at the yellow light of the lamp you and Spencer picked out months ago reflecting against those countless little squares of foil.
Your lips are drawn inwards, between your teeth, unable to help your mind from racing to other realities, ones where every detail is the very same, except Spencer chose not to open that drawer tonight.
…
Spencer explained the basis of quantum immortality to you a long time ago, in the early stages of your relationship, at a time so late in the night where a regular person would never be able to form coherent thoughts, let alone thoughts like these.
You were slumped over the kitchen island, peering at him as he wandered around, silently marveling at the preciousness of your boyfriend the world seemed to take for granted as he tried to get you to understand how cool this concept was.
“There’s also an interpretation of quantum mechanics proposed by a physicist named Hugh Everett which involves a ‘many worlds’ concept: essentially, it suggests that every possible outcome of an event creates its own branch of reality, meaning an infinite number of parallel worlds exist, each containing a version of events where everything that can happen, does happen,” he starts, widening his eyes for dramatic effect. “So quantum immortality is rooted in the concept that when we die in one timeline, we essentially just move on to the next one where every detail is the same except… well, you don’t die.”
He went on to emphatically talk about some guy’s cat in a box, but how this time, in a thought experiment that demonstrates this theory of immortality, you’re the cat.
You had pretty much lost him when he got to that part.
…
You blink, shoving the memory from your mind.
“You’re staring,” you point out quietly.
“You’re pretty,” Spencer responds. He sits next to you on the bed, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. You watch as his other hand fiddles with the condom he grabbed, running his thumb over the edges of the wrapper. His mouth opens and closes a few times before he says, “Did I do something?” You shake your head softly.
“Mm-mm.”
“Really? Because we’ve been sitting in silence and you haven’t stopped staring at the condom in my hand for the past two minutes.”
You exhale quietly, internally screaming at yourself to just spit it out.
It’s never been easy, being an agent dating an agent. Sure, agreements have been made to not profile each other, but with so many years of experience, small observations and connections about your partner’s nature are an automatic practice. You know that Spencer takes 3 sugars in his coffee just as well as you know he says your name more frequently and shortens his sentences when scared, almost like he tries to instead convey the appearance he’s mad.
You also know very well that you and Spencer have both been consciously avoiding this conversation like the plague, especially since his homecoming.
You gnaw at your lip, trying to think of something to say, but your mind can only come up with freaky images of cats that are simultaneously alive and dead until observed.
“`M sorry, I was just thinking. Lost in my mind.”
“Thinking about what?”
Relationships that are simultaneously kept and broken until a certain conversation is had.
“Um. Quantum immortality. Who’s that guy? Hugh Jackman?”
Spencer straightens, eyebrows raising a little. “Hugh Everett,” he supplies. His tone is gentle, coaxing. “You’ve been thinking about that? I told you about him months ago.”
He stands as you quietly think of a response, grabbing a hoodie from the closet to tug over your bare torso, letting his hand gently cradle the back of your head after doing so.
“Yeah. I did a little more reading on it. It’s kind of a nice thought I keep going back to. Obviously really, really scary when you think about it for too long. But nice in the sense that there’s probably a version of us out there somewhere where…” you trail off, suddenly extremely aware of the weight of your words.
He glances down to the condom he left on the comforter.
The thick silence that follows feels like it stretches across a thousand timelines, each one probably also filled with countless what-ifs and unspoken words and really bad communication, and at the very root of all of it, fear. That deep, gaping hole in both of your souls.
When Spencer finally looks at you, his eyes are so deep it takes your breath away. So deep that it jars you into just saying it.
“Spencer,” you begin, voice so quiet. “Do you still want kids?”
You find yourself shooting up a silent prayer to whoever is out there looking out for you– God or Isaac Newton or Hugh Everett or Jason Gideon:
Pleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyes.
When he doesn’t answer right away, you continue– a habit probably picked up from the person standing right in front of you. “I just feel like there was a time where we were almost talking about it, but then it… went away.”
He reaches out to gently take the condom you were now fiddling with and sets it back in the drawer, his hand resting on the edge of the table as if grounding himself. His face is soft, almost glowing in the dim yellow light.
“I know,” he starts, voice crackling at the edges.
You stay dead silent.
“I didn’t mean for it to go away,” Spencer says, the crack in his voice causing you to glance up and see his eyes brimming with unshed tears. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”
You nod, shakily, though the perpetual ache in your stomach is sharper now, more like it’s a knife stabbing you through the gut.
“I get it,” you say, even though part of you doesn’t want to. “You don’t need to be sorry.” You can’t even bring yourself to think of the implications of what he just said– all you know is that there is something fundamentally different between you and Spencer that wasn’t there before.
“It’s not that I don’t want it. I do. You know I do. But I can’t. Not now.”
You reach out your hand for him to take.
“Spencer,” you whisper. “It’s okay. Really. We don’t have to talk about it any more.”
His lips press into a thin line, and you can tell he doesn’t believe you. Clearly. It wasn’t a statement said to be believed. There was nothing okay, at all, but this isn’t a fight- there’s nothing to fight about. There's just a quiet understanding. He nods, finally, and steps back. “We should get some sleep,” he says, his voice almost too soft to hear.
You watch as he pulls back the covers and slides into bed, still in his work clothes, leaving just enough space for you beside him. After a moment you curl up next to him because, despite everything, doing the alternative would be so much worse.
Spencer's arms wrap around you, his breath warm against the nape of your neck, and you close your eyes and let the silence settle over you both, feeling the steady beat of his heart against your back. Something you would have given anything to have not so long ago.
#spencer reid#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid angst#spencer reid fanfiction#piper’s works
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Random headcanon number 20207483927
-Dick doesn’t spy on his families teams
Because he doesn’t need too
They’ll either tell him what’s happening
Or their teammates will
He’s friends with 80% of them anyway
Jason Todd was honest to god on a team with Dicks Ex who still adores him and starfire /j
No but really Roy and Kori 100% have doxxed Jason’s entire life to Dick Grayson
A) bc I will ignore any canon where these 3 aren’t close
B) Kori has never had a filter ever
C) Dick absolutely has indoctrinated the fab 5 into mission reports and now they feel weird without a debrief
D) Roy would find giving Dick and ulcer over the stupid shit his brother does hilarious
E) Roy would find giving dick and ulcer over the stupid shit HE does so so so fulfilling (revenge)
Damian is on the Titans.
No matter what titans generation of titans it is they’re responding to Nightwings status report request, fully detailed in MLA format with a reference list following APA 7 guidelines
Dick does not have to worry about young justice despite the fact they are very much NOT snitches bc Tim absolutely calls Dick and Doxxes his entire life story to him once a week minimum
(See Tim telling Dick random shit in the comics causing him to lose his balance and fall a compilation Im sure exists)
Both Clark and Wally are on the justice league. Bruce’s every dangerous move is reported to Dick via Clark and all his stupid ones are reported to Dick via Wally.
No matter how weird Dick and Babs relationship (on again, besties, off again, not talking etc) is she’s absolutely telling him either via concise email or 7 hour long sip and bitch session every single thing that happens not for help but bc ughhh wtf is happening.
Now frustratingly the same is not reciprocated
Bc
“Donna or Garth would kill me” -Roy
“*graphic details of sexcapades to distract from question*”-Kori
“Nightwing is busy” -oracle (babs just leaves when asked as a civilian)
“I’m sorry it’s just so hard to not talk to him okay?? He’s so nice” -Jon during supersons
“He’s my friend too, I can tell him what I want” current jon
“Listen he barely talks to me as it is I’d rather he still come to me with issues and insecurities without worrying his father will hear it” -Clark
“If you think I’m saying shit to you, you’re in idiot, if anything was wrong and I told you you’d make it worse go fuck yourself” -Wally
(OG Bruce Wayne hater of titans. him and Roy do fight over this title at the titans new years. Wally thinks Roy lost his place bc he found a new bird to be mad at the bat over so his timeline should shrink. Roy thinks this is bullshit bc now he hates Bruce for reasons of bird^2)
#dick grayson#nightwing#batman#jason todd#batfam#bruce wayne#tim drake#damian wayne#comics#batfamily#everyone’s a snitch your honor#remember that time on the space ship#Tim infodumps and accidentally doxxes himself#but when Bruce asks he gets a ‘none of your business’s’#Bruce is bitter about this#the only person who gets Dick Grayson info is Alfred pennyworth#he gets it from Dick Grayson#but the OG titans aren’t snitches#but only for nightwing#otherwise yeah no zip your lip#or chill with Artemis and bizzaro#he will still find a way to get info#he will not tell Jason#how the fuck he did it tho#for funsies
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Then can I request a continuation of that oneshot with Matthias? I was wondering what their marriage life and parenthood is like. Thank you in advance!! 🥰
The Duke And His Secret
Yan! Matthias x Reader
Oneshot Story (Special Chapter).
(Warnings : Balcony mature scene at the end.)
*Minors are prohibited from reading this story🚫*

Manhwa : 울어 봐, 빌어도 좋고.Cry, Even Better if You Beg. Cry, Even if You Pray.
Author & Ilustration : Solche & Van Ji
Word Count ; 1.395 word.
Hello this is Neva🦋, hope you have a nice and happy day, it's been a long time since I updated any story whether it's manhwa or Oc. sorry about that, I'm currently very focused on making a "supernatural" expecially Vampire character series project investigating and deepening it so that the character I make doesn't seem stiff and my darlings enjoy reading it. So heres some matthias cup of tea story (^3^), hope you like it Anon🦋, Lots of love - Neva🦋🦋
Might have some bad grammars, correct me if there are any mistakes in the words in the story I wrote. Anyways i hope you all enjoys my story, much love.- Neva🦋
- Main story : The Duke and His Secret
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The residence of the Duke of Arvis, the kingdom of Berg.
The atmosphere of the residence was very cheerful, full of laughter from the 2 children of the opposite sex.
One had jet black hair like the color of a crow's feathers, with bright blue eyes like the sky. The other had snow-white hair with amethyst purple eyes.
The servants in the residence could only blush in excitement seeing the two children who were only 8 years old.
2 children, siblings, with different genders. The older brother was a man with black hair like a crow, while the younger sister, a woman with snow-colored hair.
Both of them played and ran with each other in the garden
While on the other side of the garden under the tree, there was a table with a complete set of tea and also a light side dish for the mouth that went well with tea, Pastry.
There were two women sitting there, one was no longer young, estimated to be 80 years old, while the other, still looked young but not so young, estimated to be 50 years old.
The two women were, Elysee von herhardt, and Norma Catharina Von herhardt, daughter-in-law and mother-in-law, who were both watching their grandchildren.
Felix Von Herhard and Airedith Von Herhard. Felix and Aire. Siblings who were only 1 year apart. The servants said they were Irish twins. Because they were only 1 year apart.
Norma stared at the two little children playing with each other, the woman was no longer young, she felt very sad if she couldn't play with them.
While Elysee occasionally smiled and drank tea elegantly, her eyes staring towards the balcony of their manor house. There Elysee could see her affectionate son and daughter-in-law.
In fact, as Elysee remembered when Matthias brought you to the Herhardt residence for the first time, a forced marriage that made your parents agree, you really didn't like being close to Matthias, but as the saying goes, struggle will never give disappointing results. The fact that Matthias desperately shows that he does love you, sincerely even though his way at the beginning was wrong.
Slowly you accepted Matthias, he never forced you to make love or do things he wanted but you didn't like, he listened to your wishes, all your anger, even though at the beginning you were afraid Matthias would hurt you, but he didn't do that.
Matthias even went to a psychiatrist to help overcome how to eliminate apathy and grow an attitude of sympathy and become caring and willing to accept differences of opinion, rejection and so on.
There Elysee could see how Matthias kissed your cheek affectionately, if Elysee remembered again the woman wanted to laugh at how Matthias' expression said love but with a flat expression.
Like father, like child. The fruit does not fall far from the tree, that's Matthias, just like his father.
.
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You are relaxing on the balcony, enjoying the hot spring, so warm but shady.
Down there, in the garden, you see your mother-in-law, Elysee and Matthias' grandmother, Norma, busy staring at Felix and Aire who are playing with each other, your and Matthias' children.
While your husband? Matthias, the man is busy cooing affectionately behind you, kissing your bare shoulder affectionately because you are wearing an Off-shoulder dress. Damn, this man knows the opportunity in adversity.
Many things have happened during the 9 years you have been with Matthias, you have faced the ups and downs together, but you know that Matthias wants to learn and tries to prove himself. As a result, the man becomes like a cat in heat, always wanting to be close and not wanting to be far away.
"Matty! Don't bite! Later mom and grandma will see, I'll be embarrassed"
You complain because this time Matthias bites and sips lovingly leaving a mark on your bare shoulder.
While Matthias, the man is only busy kissing, sucking your shoulder and neck, his hands also don't stay still on your thigh, stroking affectionately. Never mind that it was currently in public, but fortunately the balcony railing was 100% covered with carved marble, so the people below only saw that Matthias and you were just hugging.
"Don't refuse like that my love, it's your own fault for wearing such revealing clothes, this is called an invitation for me"
Matthias continued kissing and nuzzling your shoulder and neck.
"Felix and Aire are already 8 years old, isn't it time for them to have a new sibling?"
"No! Wait until they are 10 years old, then a new sibling"
Too bad, your husband didn't accept the rejection, instead Matthias stared with a mischievous grin.
.
.
Elysee chuckled softly at what she had just seen, causing amazement at Norma and the 2 little kids who were currently sitting in front of them, resting because they were tired of running and playing.
Norma snorted and drank her tea slowly, softly asking.
"What made you chuckle so cutely Elysee?"
Elysee just smiled shaking her head, and poked Felix's cheek which was a copy of Matthias and also rubbed Aire who was busy eating pastry.
"Nothing mom, I think we need to build another house"
Blinking one eye mischievously at her mother-in-law Norma, while Norma who was given that just laughed happily.
Wiping away tears slowly because she was tired of laughing. Norma knew exactly what Elysee meant, a new presence, a new member, Felix and Aire's future sibling.
"Well, at least our Matthias is full of energy to want to have lots of children"
The two middle-aged women laughed together, making the two little children in front of them look at each other, shake their heads slowly and just continue eating the pastry served in front of them.
.
.
.
On the balcony, Matthias was still busy kissing your shoulder and neck affectionately which was so tempting to his desire.
His hands were so adept at entering your lower dress, rubbing your soft thighs gently with full squeezes passion.
"Matt! Not here!"
You tried to protest Matthias, but like talking to a wall, Matthias ignored your protest.
Until his ladder slipped into your underwear, rubbing your sensitive intimate area slowly.
"Matthias!?". The more firmly you refused, the wilder Matthias became.
"What love? I know you enjoy it"
Matthias naughtily sucked your neck slowly, while his 2 fingers were busy moving back and forth in your sensitive area, so deep and expert.
You were only able to hold back your moans, afraid that a servant would pass through the balcony door or Grandma and mother would see you both suspiciously from down there, as much as possible you acted normal.
"Come on love, don't be so shy, I know you enjoy it"
Your ass was slapped lightly by Matthias deliberately full of temptation.
His hands got faster when he felt your walls squeezing his fingers.
"Want to come out love? Yes? Come to me love, came to my hands"
Until, you came hard! Both of your hands covered your mouth to muffle your moans, your eyes closed while your legs shook unable to bear the weight.
While Matthias' fingers were still busy moving slowly, down there, Matthias could feel and see the puddles of water falling. You squirted, it turned out.
Matthias chuckled softly and kissed your cheek tenderly.
Matthias passionately devours your lips, forcing his tongue into your mouth, tracing every inch of your mouth. Claiming it to be his.
You who are out of breath try to pat Matthias' chest, but Matthias this man is full of passion, so you bite his lips and scratch his neck, causing blood spots on his lips and neck.
Matthias just winces softly before pulling your hair back, not too roughly but not too slowly, enough to make you look at him.
Matthias' passionate eyes stare directly at you, whispering sensually right in front of your lips, while licking the corner of your lips affectionately.
"Feels so good love? Do you want to continue here or in the room hmm?"
Damn, your fate is so unlucky to marry this shameless nobleman but god, you cant hold your heart, you love this man, as same as matthias love you.
His secret, his little heaven secret.
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Tag list; @snowflakes666 @nerdygoateepeanut @blurryperrtymoonlight @luminethebest @scenicelixir @n4muqr @cannyyyyy @athena-roy @sirenetheblogger @rai-xxx @thehopingfairy @ryusooze @yaoduriaa @merveeeeesworld
Please dont steal my work, or use without my permissions, Always be good people Dear. Much love, Neva🦋🦋.
©️Nymphea0 2024 , OG story, Project Dark Manhwa Character Story.
#obsessed#possesive#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere male#yandere x darling#manhwa x reader#yandere manhwa#yandere manhwa x reader#manhwa#cry or better yet beg#matthias x reader#manhwa x you#nevaerah
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nagi’s couch is your safe space.
he’s not the most emotionally intelligent guy and you’re a sensitive soul, so this is where he bundles you up and takes you when things go wrong. poor grade on a test? couch. missed your train? chips and chocolate on the couch (electrolytes, he insists as he holds a piece up to your mouth). dumped by the loser you were seeing? cry on the couch.
it’s been over a year since that incident, but you haven’t been very successful in dating since. no one really appeals to you that way.
“i’m gonna die alone.” you say blankly, staring at nagi’s 80 inch tv. there’s a simulation game on, passively filling the background while you whine to him about how miserable you are. normally, you try not to talk about love stuff to nagi because after you cried to him the last time the vibe got really weird and then he went and beat up the guy. reo’s lawyers were really good and he didn’t have to pay anything to boot, but you’d hate for him to have to wear a tie (his mortal enemy) to court again.
“i’ll climb in the grave,” he promises. “don’t worry.”
“it doesn’t mean anything after i’m dead,” you grouse. “nobody wants to hang out with me while i’m still alive.”
“i’m hanging out with you,” he looks down at you, sprawled in his lap, your head resting on his left thigh. you puff up your cheeks and he pokes them to watch you deflate slowly.
“you don’t want to, though,” you say. “you don’t want anything. unless it’s related to soccer. you once told me you’d eat only grey paste if it gave you the nutrients you needed to never cook again.”
nagi huffs a little sigh, one that tells you he’s thinking dreamily of grey paste. you scrunch up your face and sit up.
“i’m just holding you hostage because it’s too much of a pain to say no to me or make other friends,” you say sadly. “at least reo can get you to go out of the house.”
“there are other people out there,” his mouth twists like he’s eaten a lemon. “i don’t like it if they look at us.”
“please,” you laugh. “like the paparazzi would ever make that mistake.”
nagi puts a hand on your back and forces you forward. you realize too late as you try to squirm off the couch that he’s moved and put his legs on either side of you, one of them dangling off the side, the other under the cushions. he’s trapped you like a ball, you realize with some indignation.
you land with your face in his chest.
“what are you doing,” you say into his shirt, secretly not displeased.
“getting comfortable,” is his succinct reply. you plant your forehead on his sternum and breathe deeply for a moment, savoring his closeness. you’re always a little afraid of squishing him, so you like it when he maneuvers you like this, proves that he wants to be around you. “you’re holding me hostage.”
“i am not,” you protest. he puts his hand on the back of your head, prevents you from moving.
“you’re on top of me.” his tone is so matter-of-fact it makes you want to laugh. if nagi wanted to move out from under you, he would. he’s holding you here.
“i’m gonna die on this couch,” you revise your previous statement. “i’m gonna die unloved, squished by—”
“i love you,” nagi says. his voice is sonorous, deep; you can feel the bass reverberating from his bones.
“uh,” you say. “what?”
“i do want things that aren’t soccer because i love you,” he says it like he’s explained it a million times, a long-suffering tutor. “if you want to date me too, then you won’t have to worry about it.”
“oh,” you drop your forehead, trying to hide your smile. “okay. yay.”
#okay ❤️ yay ❤️#UGH i have to do new tags?);&(&39;	:@;;&!(‘fnfkckfkwofodiw the only reason my hq stuff ever gsts tagged bc theres precedent….#blue lock x reader#bllk x reader#nagi x reader#nagi seishiro x reader#bllk x reader fluff#nagi x reader fluff#crybaby reader moment
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I'm not sure you understand.
I'm not sure you understand how excruciatingly lonely someone can be.
How lonely do you think you'd be if you grew up hearing every day that your opinion didn't matter? That no one would be attracted to you because you're too chubby? How embarrassing your own mother thought you were? How your accomplishments were pathetic compared to hers? Hearing about all of the things that were so incredibly wrong with you. Hearing how much of a disappointment you turned out to be.
How lonely do you think you'd be if the only people available to make friends with cared exclusively about the one thing you couldn't do no matter how hard you tried? If everything you ever cared about was considered evil and got taken from you the moment you found it? What if you knew that the moment you were finally free to be a person, everyone you ever loved would abandon you for it? That they would decide they never wanted to see or speak to you again? Every single one. What if you realized you were alone before that even happens? What if you realized all the love you've ever experienced in life was fake?
How lonely do you think you'd be if you grew up so different from everyone else around you that you didn't even feel human? What if you were made to believe that you didn't deserve to exist? What if you were told you were going to die a horrific death for being everything you were inside?
How lonely would you be if you spent every night terrified and trying desperately to cover up your sobbing because you can't tell anyone about any of it?
What would you do?
What would you do to have a friend? What would you do to have anyone? How desperate do you think you'd be? How would you even accomplish that if you weren't allowed to talk to anyone else outside of your family and their friends? Where could you possibly find someone else to connect with someone as awkward, strange, angry, and sad as you? Someone who could know about all of the things inside of you and still love you.
I made someone.
I gave him my passion, my strength, my courage, my confidence, my sense of adventure, my stubbornness, my sense of loyalty, my sense of humor. I gave him my love of dinosaurs, my love of cars, my love of horror movies, my love of 80's music. I had his entire life figured out. I named him. I thought of him whenever I was lonely, which was always. He was the only way I could safely love and be loved by in return. He never went away. Why would he? He's my best friend.
What good would memory barriers have done? How useful would it be if we didn't even get along? What purpose would there be if it caused me any distress to have Alex?
True loneliness can be traumatizing.
Non-disordered plurality can exist.
Created headmates can be life saving.
#i will have alex for the rest of my life and there's nothing anyone can do about it#plurality#actually plural#plural community#plural system#pluralblr#sysblr#system community#mixed origin system#endogenic system#traumagenic system#actually traumagenic#actually endogenic#endo safe#pro endo#did#multiplicity#headmates#octive#introject#oc#original post#everyone should listen to me#actually a system#did system
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PICK A CARD: what would drive you to kill? (18+) *a little cringe*
Hello and welcome to this new reading of mine! In here I will tell you what would drive you to kill. I hope you enjoy it and find it interesting!
masterpost > paid readings > patreon masterlist
for the extended version of this reading and 80+ exclusive and extended pac's check put my patreon

Pile 1:
What would drive me to kill?
The people I love. Easy. No hesitation. My friends, my family, my brothers and sisters. I don’t care who it is or why, if they try to hurt the people I love, I’ll lose it. Fully. I’d go blackout if I had to. Because you don’t touch my people. Ever. You don’t even look at them the wrong way. I’d rather be someone who protects with words. Who hugs it out. Who talks through it. But this world doesn’t always let you do that. Sometimes people cross lines that can’t be uncrossed. And in that moment? I wouldn’t be kind. I wouldn’t be sweet. I’d be done. I’d kill for them and still hold their hand after. I’d wash the blood off and help them fall asleep that night. They’d never even have to know. I’d carry it alone, I’d take the weight, the fear, the aftermath, if it meant they get to live their life safe and untouched.
extended reading > paid readings
Pile 2:
What would drive me to kill?
When it’s survival or death. When someone forces me to pick between them or me, and I’m sorry, but I’ll pick me every single time. I’ve been through too much to let someone take me out. I’ve crawled out of places so dark most people wouldn’t even know how to breathe in them. I’ve seen things that rewired my brain, I’ve healed from things I never even talked about. I’ve had to rebuild myself using scraps; no map, no help, just stubbornness and a pulse. I had no one. So if someone tries to end that, if someone thinks they can take away the little bit of peace I’ve found, the safety I scraped together with bloody hands? No. I’ll kill before I let that happen, and I won’t feel bad about it either, because I know what it cost me to survive.
extended reading > paid readings
Pile 3:
What would drive me to kill?
A memory, or a moment. A past version of me who stood there and did nothing, or couldn’t, or wasn’t strong enough. That version of me still lives in my chest, it still cries when no one is around. It still shakes when certain things come up. I don’t talk about it much, not because it wasn’t real, but because it was too real. Something happened, and that broke me in a way I didn’t even notice at first. By the time I was aware of it the damage was already done. I don’t even know what version hurts the most; the one that froze, the one that stayed silent, or the one that couldn’t fix it. And even though people say it wasn’t my fault, even if they try to reassure me that over and over again, I still carry it like it was; like I should’ve known better, as if I should’ve done better, as if I failed someone who didn’t deserve it. So now? If I ever see that again, if I ever hear that same scream, that same panic, that same desperate begging, something in me will break loose. No mercy, no pause, no waiting. I won’t freeze again, I just cannot afford to do so.
extended reading > paid readings
#pick a card#pick a pile#pick an image#pick a picture#pick a photo#pac#pap#spirituality#spiritual#divination#tarot#tarot reading#tarotoftheday#tarotblr#tarot deck#tarot readings#tarot cards#free tarot#free tarot readings#free tarot reading#love reading#love readings#future spouse reading#future relationship reading#future relationship#future spouse#loa#law of assumption#free readings#free reading
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