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fly-pow-bye · 5 years ago

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DuckTales 2017 - “Double-O-Duck in You Only Crash Twice!”

Story by: Francisco Angones, Madison Bateman, Colleen Evanson, Christian Magalhaes, Bob Snow

Written by: Christian Magalhaes

Storyboard by: Sam King, Kathryn Marusik, Rachel Paek, Stephan Park

Directed by: Jason Zurek

"My name is Pad. Launchpad. McQuack. My name is Launchpad McQuack."

The episode seemingly begins in medias res, as Launchpad is infiltrating a casino. He has on some spy glasses, as he has become Double-O-Duck, super spy. He gets a call from Dew-ble-O-Duck, because Dewey Duck cannot even function if he doesn't choose an alias without the word "dew" in it, letting him know the secret code he needs to tell Enemy Agent Red Feather.

Dew-ble-O-Duck: Pastrami on rye, hold the mustard!

Double-O-Duck: Mmmm, yummy!

We can tell already that Launchpad is more Maxwell Smart than James Bond. Would anyone be surprised if he wasn’t?

As Dew-ble-O-Duck, also wearing cool glasses, distracts everyone in the room with a song fitting for this James Bond parody, Launchpad, even with his lack of any kind of intellect, manages to spot Agent Red Feather. She literally has red feathers. Unfortunately, he didn't exactly remember what tasty item he was supposed to use as a secret code.

Red Feather: Can I help you?

Launchpad: Ham and cheese!

Alas, Enemy Agent Red Feather is not exactly a fan of that smart refrigerator scene from Duncanville. She gasses Double-O-Duck before Launchpad could suggest chocolate pudding or french fries, giving a one-liner about how the kitchen is closed. It's like one of those Sierra adventure games, though they end up referencing something more modern.

YOU DIED

Yes, like Dark Souls, though they use a generic retro game losing a life sound. Even when shows involve video games with cutting edge technology, parents might not get that it's a video game if it isn't bleep bloop bleep bloop.

The entire last scene was just a new and sophisticated augmented reality game at Funso's Fun Zone: Double-O-Duck, a reference to a DuckTales '87 episode where Launchpad had to impersonate a super spy that happened to look just like him. It's a neat reference; the game even features OddDuck, the villain of the week of that episode, as an enemy.

Webby and Scrooge are at Funso's as well, though Scrooge does not appear to be interested in anything around him, never mind a room with a fake adventure in it. In an attempt to borrow money from Scrooge, Dewey tries to convince him that the game is cool, because one could use the power of virtual reality to go on an amazing adventure.

Scrooge's expression says it all; he doesn't even need to say anything to that.

Needless to say, Dewey only has one more chance to beat that Casino Royale, as that chance will be the last his allowance could afford. He also knows that he can only play this with Launchpad, because "they're a team"! Launchpad reluctantly agrees, using the famous last words of anyone before something goes terribly wrong: "what could possibly go wrong?" We then zoom into the ball pit, where we find a hidden base owned by F.O.W.L.

Yes, this is the beginning of this season's F.O.W.L. plotline that was teased at the end of Season 2. DuckTales 2017's version of Darkwing Duck's rogues' gallery is led by Bradford Buzzard, originally of Scrooge's Board of Directors before he decided to call it quits after Louie used their funding to bring back his favorite TV show. It's a long and, to be honest, kind of eh story. Now, he leads many of the villains that appeared in previous episodes, and he has made a new base.

Alongside the also named after her feather color Black Heron is Steelbeak, who comments that he wanted the base built on a sattel-lighthouse to nobody's approval. This continues the trend of James Bond references, as he is the Jaws parody from Darkwing Duck. Steelbeak is not exactly the brightest bulb at F.O.W.L., but he is completely confident and gets really offended at the accusation that he is stupid. From what I've heard, he wasn't meant to be any denser than the other villains in the original Darkwing Duck, but for the sake of giving Launchpad an evil counterpart, it works well with this plot.

Black Heron is taking the Gyro Gearloose role here, as she is working on the Intelliray, powered by a diamond from the F.O.W.L. archives. With a little more work, this ray can be used to make Scrooge dumber than the dummies! Honestly one doesn't even need any kind of ray for that to happen; seems like all you need to do is steal a couple coins from him for that.

How would she know this ray even works? Simple, she used it on a lab rat.

Not just any lab rat, either, but they turn this ordinary rat into this rather intelligent rodent that is more anthropomorphic. In fact, one may recognize this rodent from a different show from the Disney Afternoon. There's a funny story about this, actually.

Of course, this is the opposite effect of what Black Heron wanted, and she needs to work on the ray some more to make the Intelliray that makes dumb rats smart make smart ducks dumb. Steelbeak doesn't seem to get any of this, and is way more focused on how that rat managed to make clothing for herself. That's actually not a bad question, though not one relevant to the situation. There's a lot of interactions with the bright heron and the not-too-bright rooster, and it builds throughout the episode.

In order for any of those evil plans to happen, they need to get Scrooge and his family out of Funso's. It doesn't seem like it really matters, as nobody, not even the adventurer of adventurers, suspects that this place they're under is suspicious, but that was the Buzzard's orders. Bradford Buzzard may not be a bright bulb either; in the very first episode, he wanted to turn off the magical barrier that kept the Bombie from continuing his unending journey to kill his boss...actually, that makes a lot of sense now. Black Heron orders Steelbeak to get the Scrooge family out without Scrooge getting suspicious about this new conspiracy against him.

That won't be too difficult, as Scrooge has different plans than trying to figure out if there's a conspiracy against him. There's a B plot about Scrooge getting convinced to go into the arcade section and getting addicted to Skee-Ball. Webby even calls it Skee-Ball, which is a trademarked term for the rolling ball game, even though the game itself calls it "Prospector Pete's Goldrush Bonanza!" They could have avoided any trademark issues, but they went with the brand name anyway. Well, if Disney could pay for DJ Khaled, anything is possible.

Again, this is a B-plot where there isn't that much to it, though I can't say I wasn't entertained by Scrooge taking this Gold Rush as an adventure and treating the tickets it spits out as actual gold. There is also a point to this: he becomes so addicted, that, say, if a kid and a bumbling idiot get kidnapped by a group with a vast conspiracy against Clan McDuck, he wouldn't know because his quest for tickets is the only thing on his mind.

Totally not speaking of which, Dewey and Launchpad play their last game of Double-O-Duck, and they do manage to get past the "secret code" part by the way of Dewey taking over for him. They get to the "win the card game" part, except the usual opponent has been replaced by some special boss. At least, that's what they assume. He's also wearing the glasses, but neither of them take that as a clue that this person may be a not-so-fellow player.

They have to play a game of baccarat chemin de fer, and Launchpad pretends to know what any of those words mean. The good news for him is that it was gibberish to Steelbeak, too. as both of them end up just saying random card terms while slamming the cards down, convincing each other that they got the upper hand. This all ends up leading to Steelbeak changing the game to 52 Teeth Pickup. That, of course, means a fight scene.

During this fight scene, we get a shot of what is happening in the real world, where we see the carnage this unscripted fight scene is causing. Why are there little kids in the middle of the AR room, clearly not playing the game judging by their lack of glasses? We see a little bit of this earlier, too, where Dewey takes off his glasses to reveal that one of the characters was just the Funso's mascot standing in the middle of the room. There is at least one enemy to fight in the game even if it was played as intended; I can imagine someone accidentally walloping a real person while fighting the fake one. Maybe I shouldn't think about this too hard.

If I were to nitpick some more, one of the hits randomly has a hit flash, even though there's none in the other punches. There was nothing different about that hit; I could understand using a hit flash if Steelbeak actually hit someone with his namesake, but it was just another punch. Was the censors just not happy with that particular one, but the other punches were okay?

The fight does go outside the AR room, leading them to the restaurant area where confused onlookers are looking at these weird glasses-wearing people fight as if they were special agents. I do like this shot where we see Steelbeak punch Dew-ble-O-Duck and Double-O-Duck out of a window in the AR world, and then it cuts to the real world, where the pool this lead to was actually the ball pit. The same ball pit they zoomed into to reveal the new F.O.W.L. Lair, in fact!

When Double-O-Duck and Dew...alright, I'm getting tired of calling them that already even if that's the roles they were given. When Launchpad and Dewey wake up, they're locked in a glass cell. That could mean only one thing: they finally beat the casino level! This leads to an interesting dynamic: they think they're still in a video game, despite being in the very real F.O.W.L. lair. This is good for the plot, as we'll soon see.

Meanwhile, we see that Black Heron managed to get the ray to work as it should, making the minions so dumb, they think a generic puzzle cube, they didn't want to tread on Mr. Rubik's toes even if Bay Tek was fine, is food. I mention this because it's a running gag.

Back to the cells, we see that all the other smartened up lab animals, including that rat from before, another much larger rat, a housefly, and two chipmunks, decide to help this large duck out of this situation. Alright, I'll drop the act: these are the Rescue Rangers. They're not named, but they're the Rescue Rangers; they're even constantly followed by an instrumental of their theme song.

There is an interesting behind-the-scenes story here: alongside the mascot of the biggest entertainment corporation in the world, the Rescue Rangers were supposed to be off-limits to DuckTales 2017 for various reasons. They were originally just going to have the small Gadget reference, referring to her only as "the intelligent rodent", but they kept building and building it to the point where the rest of the Rescue Rangers made it in, too. Once the executives caught on to the scheme, they decided to just allow it.

What possibly helps this is that we never focus on them. For starters, we never get to hear them talk. The audience always sees their scenes from the duck's point of view, and, in the rules of the Rescue Rangers, humans, or ducks in this case, can't communicate with rodents even if they are smart. This is not to say they never do anything major in the plot; it's thanks to them that that all important "cell release" button was pushed, freeing Launchpad and Dewey and getting them to "the next level". Dewey does seem to think that Launchpad came up with the solution to teach a mouse to fly a plane, and Launchpad just goes with it. It may not be out of malice, it's probably just because he's Launchpad.

That next level? Find the secret weapon!

Those wielders of the secret weapon are not exactly in good terms with each other at this point. Black Heron isn't too happy that Steelbeak interpreted getting rid of Scrooge's family is to get two of his family members and lock them up right in F.O.W.L.'s headquarters. This is because Black Heron knows that this is a perfect way to lead Scrooge McDuck right to them, as Scrooge would eventually figure out they're missing and figure out exactly where they went. She is that genre savvy.

Not savvy to anything is Steelbeak, and after Black Heron decides to insult him again and again for his mistake, he finally has enough and snatches the Intelliray right out of her hands, and shoots her with it. That takes out Black Heron out of the whole episode, actually, as the most that happens with her after this is that, when Dewey and Launchpad get to the room she's in, Dewey rightfully assumes the bad guy who is trying to figure out how her robot arm works is way too easy for the mission right after the moon logic puzzle of teaching rats to fly planes. How unbalanced!

Enter Steelbeak and his army of generic puzzle cube-gnawers, armed with the Intelliray and a bunch of one-liners that Dewey wants him to skip. I debated with myself on whether or not him not saying "where's the 'skip dialogue' button" was a missed opportunity or not. Another small fight happens, this time with no random hit flashes. With one hit, Steelbeak drops the Intelliray to the ground.

He then picks it up and attempts to shoot Dewey with it, Launchpad getting in the way with the classic "take the bullet for him" trope. Dewey does the "big no" trope, only to tell him that this must have been his last life. Wait, there were no lives before, the video game seemed to be "you died, game over" in the first scene. Dewey can't be consistent with what video game he was playing!

But wait, if all hope is lost, why is the ray blue? Well, it appears that Steelbeak forgot to check if that gun was set to "make smart rat dumb", or "make dumb rat braindead" in this case. Instead, we get a James Bond reference I actually recognize.

(special thanks to martosi231234 for this GIF)

Okay, maybe I should have made this a GIF; they totally do the James Bond intro parody here, complete with a maybe too obvious parody of the "dah dah" part of the James Bond theme. No shooting the screen, though; TV-Y7 does have its limits.

Inner Double-O-Duck: I'll take it from here, chum.

This inner Double-O-Duck shows up a couple times, mostly acting as his new intelligent guardian angel. Dressing up as one of the minions, thanks to knocking one out earlier, he sneaks into a large computer room and deals with the minions by telling them to go to Sector 13. They don't know what that means, but with his newfound intellect, Launchpad persuades them to go there anyway.

It's here where Launchpad finds out everything about the newly revived Fiendish Organization for World Larceny's conspiracy against Mr. McD. It's also here that he finds out that Steelbeak kidnapped poor Dewford, trapping him with rope and boating him across town. Since Dewey isn't a superhero, there's no way he can just get out of the rope. Well, maybe not every superhero can get out of the rope. Oh, and yes, Intelligent Launchpad always calls Dewey Dewford, but Scrooge is still Mr. McD. That nickname is that ingrained in him.

Most importantly, he finds out he's no longer in a video game...actually, I am not sure when that was supposed to happen. We know it does happen because it comes up later in the episode. A little before this point, I was almost expecting a rather disappointing ending where it was revealed this whole episode was just the video game, but this scene proves that can't happen because the game wouldn't known about the F.O.W.L. plan.

The boat chase is on. While the new far-more-intelligent Double-O-Duck chases the bad guy, he also tries to call Mr. McD and tell him all about what he learned, potentially progressing the plot arc much too early.

Unfortunately for Launchpad and indirectly himself, Scrooge is busy counting the tickets. I can imagine not wanting to trust the ticket counters. He also questions why he can't just keep the tickets and presumably have a giant ticket bin to swim in, and Webby convinces him that the tickets expire at the end of the day. The cashier attempts to explain that isn't the case, and Webby holds up a pizza tray and shushes him. There's some really good expressions in this episode.

After Launchpad tries to let Dewey know this isn't a game, to no avail due to the loud boats, and a pretty action packed chase scene where, fitting for Launchpad, he crashes his boat and, not so fitting for the usual Launchpad, makes a makeshift water skii out of two of the boat's boards and a grappling hook, unfortunately failing to get to him, Steelbeak makes it to his destination: the sattel-lighthouse. See, everything is connected; he even got to go to his dream lair!

This reveals his ultimate plan: turning the sattel-lighthouse into a giant Intelliray, and this time, he did know to check the dial to make all of the rats and other animals in Duckberg as dumb as he is. Launchpad tries to convince Steelbeak to reconsider this plan, as this would make Duckburg so dumb that they would forget to breathe, but...

Steelbeak: That fancy speak won't work on me, Dummie-O-Duck! Hah, classic.

He makes his own fistbump jokes, he's a villain I'd love to hate. How does he get out of this situation? Well, I'll give a giant hint on that: after Launchpad gets saved, he says this.

Launchpad: Thanks for the...

(3 seconds later)

...rescue.

They might as well have put it in giant text, put fireworks around it, and have a choir sing the word "rescue". Good thing this isn't a Cartoon Network reboot. As forced as that scene was, it's still an amazing scene.

I will spoil this, though: before that previous scene happened, he did manage to activate the Intellisatellite, and it's almost about to fire. Anyone could guess that Launchpad's newfound intellect is not going to survive past this episode, and him getting in the way of a giant endumbening laser is the way to do it. And yes, I know endumbening is not a word, but I bet Steelbeak didn't know that. As the song from the first scene plays again, this time showing that it had way more meaning than it did before, Launchpad questions if this is the way to go.

Launchpad: But I can't sacrifice my intelligence! There's so much more I can accomplish! Stop the evil conspiracy out to get us! Solve world hunger! Land a plane!

Oh, his intellect is definitely not going to survive. Also, there's a more personal reason for his questioning, and it was a theme throughout the episode: Launchpad wants Dewey to see him as a competent person to look up to, and, unlike Steelbeak, he usually doesn't have the confidence that this newfound intellect gave him. This makes this a rather heartfelt scene.

Somehow, they get back to the arcade with Dewey still thinking this was the game. There is no explanation for this whatsoever, and even Launchpad questions if it was a game...wait, is this actually that "it was all a game" ending I didn't want? What happened? Why are they here now? How are they here now? What happened to Black Heron? Eh, maybe I should take Dewey's words, from a previous scene, into account.

Dewey: Why are you overthinking this?!

I will say Dewey believing this was all a video game does at least give us a high stakes F.O.W.L. plot without advancing the arc too far this early in the season. Not even Launchpad could do that, as, in the end, Launchpad is back to his old self. He completely forgot about everything he saw, so he couldn't warn Mr. McD about all the misfortune that's going to happen. I will say that I am glad to see that there is a slight hint that the events of this episode did happen, as they do return to that puzzle cube running gag. A running gag that, while not having a real payoff, does have a point to it, how wonderful!

Oh, and as for Scrooge McDuck, with all of those tickets...he only managed to get a very, very small prize. Pretty accurate to the world of redemption games, I'm afraid to say. Don't want to anger that certain powerful rat.

How does it stack up?

The AR glasses do lead to some plot holes, and a lot of the episode relies on references, but none of that ruins the episode. Even the vague ending works in the episode's favor. Hell, maybe it will be explained in the future; this is the kind of show where I can expect that. Maybe not.

With great spy action, some great one-liners, a good villain, and some fantastic cameos from a fellow Disney Afternoon staple, this is another fantastic episode.

Next, suspicious mermaids!

← Quack Pack! 🦆 The Lost Harp of Mervana! →

#fpb dt 2017 #ducktales 2017 #ducktales #disney #fpb reviews

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incorrect009quotes · 7 years ago

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AMM: One day, I'm gonna get a dog that's a cross between a bulldog and a shitzu and I'm going to call it a-

Marzipan: No.

#incorrect 009; quotes #009;comic #amm #marzipan #src: dumb and dumber #marzi's probably chill with the dog part theyre just not down for calling the dog a [truck honk]

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italicwatches · 7 years ago

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Aho-Girl - Episode 04

I have a job to do. And that job is looking up fighting game moves to describe how we do violence. It’s Aho-Girl, episode 04! Here we GO!

-We begin with the blonde rude boy, Kurosaki Ryuuichi. He’s a substitute shin—

-Wait wrong anime. He’s one of Yoshiko’s roughest, toughest foot soldiers! That’s even dumber, guy.

-Opening! With our protagonists on fans for some simple paper theatre.

-So Ryuuichi is trying to fight A-kun, and A-kun is holding him back even with a Yoshiko dangling off his back and egging it all on…When a few neurons actually manage to rub together and Yoshiko remembers she has a drama she didn’t set to record! She’s got to get home! Which leaves Ryuuichi to fight A-kun—

-SA SERU MONO KA

-Ryuuichi goes down hard, and is kind of into this.

-New scene! Yoshiko is helping at a hero show at a local department store to see the Pachi Rangers…And she invited the kids form the park. Who are wise and worldly enough to be humiliated here despite their young ages. The horror in their faces is kind of amazing, and then they’re getting yanked up on the stage…And this poor foolish girl Nozomi wants to follow in Yoshiko’s footsteps! No, don’t! “It’ll ruin you as a human being!” I mean the little boy isn’t wrong.

-Out comes the villain type, and young Nozomi gets ‘taken hostage’, as Yoshiko plays things up for the kids…Except she gets a little too into it, and is ready to fight this villain herself?! The little boys have to try and hold her back, which they fail at utterly as she takes to the stage. She yanks her novelty mask over her face to HENSHIN…

-As the boys realize, with growing horror, what could happen here. If Nozomi gets saved by Yoshiko, her hero worship will grow stronger. She’ll start to imitate Yoshiko. They’ll have another, smaller Yoshiko to deal with! They can’t let that happen! They have to step in the way, and be the heroes instead…As Yoshiko drops masks onto them! Masks they do not want.

-Also the villain actor gets an actual FALCON PUNCH to the stomach from Yoshiko, which he is not happy about. The boys have to rush in and be like “look go down to us do not let Yoshiko be the one to get the killing blow mister please”, JUST READ THE ROOM and read the room he does! The crowd goes wild, and Nozomi is finally free and…Totally hero-worships Yoshiko. Keep fighting, young boys, for Nozomi’s future.

-New scene! Ryuuichi again, who’s going through Yoshiko’s rough tough training to master befriending Akutsu-aniki! He’s learning to be A-kun’s faithful dog and Sayaka can only watch in horror and disbelief.

-New scene! It’s Yoshiko’s teacher, trying to get her failures through to her, and she’s slowly but surely losing her shit. And all A-kun can do is watch in horror. Math is a lost cause, and when they try language, we see the first signs that Yoshiko isn’t so much just “dumb”, as “entirely separate from the assumptions of reality”. Given a simple test to read a tiny story and feel out the emotions of the characters, she instead insists that they are more complicated people than this story portrays, and somehow it turns into an accusation towards the teacher that she’s never been in love!

-Smug Yoshiko face is like nails on a chalkboard. Oh and she ate so many bananas she’s about to hurl. But see? You couldn’t even figure out her true feelings, let alone those of the characters in this story! Oh god her logic is starting to make sense to the teacher, as her entire faith in everything gets rattled! She’s going into shock.

-Yoshiko broke her. And A-kun tries to put her back together, as she…

…

o o o

-I don’t know what I expected.

-But this was not it.

-She wants him to teach her about love.

-This 28 year old teacher is trying to seduce one of her own students, that’s how bad Yoshiko broke her.

-So he tries to turn her down. Is it because you don’t like older women?! FOCUS AND GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF, don’t let Yoshiko into your head! But she’s never been any kind of love, how can she understand anything?! And he has to unleash a BRIGHT SLAP to try and clear her head, which sends her spiraling to the ground, as Yoshiko mindlessly eats a banana and tips herself over into spraying banana juice everywhere. Please recover, sensei, you’re the only one still willing to deal with Yoshiko…

-New scene! Ryuuichi is facing his final battle, as he kneels before A-kun, begging to become his servant! A-kun is very confused, but finally relents. Ryuuichi has become A-kun’s dog! Wait didn’t this start with wanting to be his friend? (Also I was going to pull an amazing reaction shot from this scene but mocking Ryuuichi’s confused feelings felt a little too mean)

-New scene! It’s the day before A-kun’s birthday, and so Yoshiko wants Sayaka’s help to break into his bedroom and find evidence of what to get him for his birthday! But, but he’ll be furious…Yoshiko is used to it! Sayaka isn’t!

-And cue the disciplinary committee president, or Boob President as Yoshiko calls her. She heard everything! And so she’s going to…

-Report them to the authorities?

-Tell A-kun so he can stop them?

-Dangle this as blackmail to get them to behave properly?

-Nope she wants in. She wants in that bedroom with a sleeping Akutsu! Are your feeling for him as huge as your boobs? …Yes? THEN YOU’RE IN!

-So that night, it’s the leap across the balconies…Where they find that A-kun has trapped the door. And Sayaka ends up being the one to stop the trap from killing them outright as a huge weight with a spiked bottom falls, and she’s got to catch it…

-A-kun is sleeping like a baby…And as Sayaka and Yoshiko hunt, Boob President just watches, getting ready to take a shot of him asleep…Also Sayaka has to keep desperately keeping A-kun from waking up. Earplugs when Yoshiko shouts, a sleeping mask when Boob President’s phone flash goes off, and Yoshiko found A-kun’s underwear! Boob President needs those boxers right now, as her duties as the disciplinary committee president!

-The noise of their resulting fight leads to Ruri bursting in to demand her brother keep it down…And then she gets FLAME CHOKEd right into the door, knocking her out cold. So, uh, that’s a problem. Thus comes the desperate attempt to hurry up and get out of here…As Yoshiko cuddles up to A-kun! Boob President demands to join in, and Sayaka can only watch this madness, as Boob President ends up putting THE PEOPLE’S ELBOW right into A-kun’s stomach, and he finally awakes, with a demonic fury heretofore unbeknownst to humanity!

-And Sayaka’s own frustration comes out as she herself just wants these damned idiots to STOP AND THINK for once in their lives! Even A-kun feels apologetic for how he upset this poor earnest blonde who really did just want to find a way to do something nice for him.

-Mission Complete~

So we’re just on the damn escalator, then. Gonna keep escalating. Is that right?

#where I watch #recap #anime #aho-girl

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project-casting · 8 years ago

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Here's How Much Hollywood Actors and Crew Members Get Paid

Here’s How Much Hollywood Actors and Crew Members Get Paid

The salaries of Hollywood’s biggest stars and production staff have been revealed. Paychecks for reliable megastars like Jennifer Lawrence remain enormous with the actress earning a reported $20 million for her upcoming feature film Red Sparrow. Also included in the highest bracket of Hollywood top-earners include Will Smith and Dwayne Johnson. In TV, the biggest payouts were for The Big Bang…

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#acting tips #featured #film school

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scriptfirm · 8 years ago

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Smart Dumb Comedy - It's A Thing!

Smart Dumb Comedy – It’s A Thing!

What the heck is this sub-genre of comedy films that are cropping up on our screens? Well, filmmakers aren’t being rude. They just want audiences to know that screenwriters toiled over their keyboards to write “dumb” gags. They are purposefully farcical and deserve more respect than dumb comedies which are poorly developed and badly written. Such comedy movies are often relegated to low-brow…

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#comedy #film #movies

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lazadashirts · 5 years ago

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Official Are You Oke Hand Tee Shirt

I’ve never read a more ignorant feed in my life. Is it a coincidence that all trump supporters are racist bigots. Nope, just a bunch of dumb rednecks that went out and voted to elect this idiot too, and continue to support his radical movements. I just became dumber by reading this. Charles Weisman speaks for yourself, little fella. there are many high paying jobs that have become available in…

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grabtee · 6 years ago

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zhumeimv · 6 years ago

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The Tragic Life of Jim Carrey

Date: 2019-12-07 20:00:00

[aoa id=’0′][dn_wp_yt_youtube_source type=”101″ id=”GvXS1my-6aY”][/aoa]

This rubber-faced king of comedy pretty well defined silly, slapstick humor in the ’90s, with movies like “Dumb and Dumber” and “Liar Liar” becoming instant classics. But just because he makes us laugh on camera, doesn’t mean he’s necessarily happy off it. Jim Carrey’s life has been a rollercoaster…

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teespix · 6 years ago

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Dumb and Dumber did somebody say christmas shirt

Sara did not want to continue lying to American people in the Dumb and Dumber did somebody say christmas shirt House and stopped doing press conferences. Now she can lie on FauxNews without any uncomfortable questions.PS. The new press secretary, a hopeless alcoholic, is yet to do a single press briefing. Other than using public office a d public money to aggrandize and enrich himself and his…

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theamericanfreedomparty · 6 years ago

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ADL Adds ‘OK’ Hand Gesture, Bowl Haircuts, Anti-Antifa Logo to ‘Hate List’

By Breitbart News

The Anti-Defamation League (ADL) added the “OK” hand signal, the “bowlcut,” and anti-Antifa logos to its list of ��modern calling cards of hate.” Yep, you read that correctly, Jim Carrey’s bowl haircut in Dumb and Dumber is now … problematic, as are the early Beatles, Moe from the Three Stooges, and Mary Stuart Masterson in everything.

Eddie Murphy’s iconic “OK” shot from…

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americanfreedomparty · 6 years ago

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ADL Adds ‘OK’ Hand Gesture, Bowl Haircuts, Anti-Antifa Logo to ‘Hate List’

By Breitbart News

The Anti-Defamation League (ADL) added the “OK” hand signal, the “bowlcut,” and anti-Antifa logos to its list of “modern calling cards of hate.” Yep, you read that correctly, Jim Carrey’s bowl haircut in Dumb and Dumber is now … problematic, as are the early Beatles, Moe from the Three Stooges, and Mary Stuart Masterson in everything.

Eddie Murphy’s iconic “OK” shot from Beverly…

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1steeshop · 5 years ago

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Ocean I Love To Blow Vintage T-Shirt

I’ve never read a more ignorant feed in my life. Is it a coincidence that all trump supporters are racist bigots. Nope, just a bunch of dumb rednecks that went out and voted to elect this idiot too, and continue to support his radical movements. I just became dumber by reading this. Charles Weisman speaks for yourself, little fella. There are many high paying jobs that have become available in…

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torentialtribute · 6 years ago

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Special case? Manchester United’s Paul Pogba needs to be special to merit that

Paul Pogba is looking for a new challenge. No, he won't try to justify the £ 89million Manchester United spent on him three years ago. He wants a challenge, not mission impossible.

Pogba's challenge echoes that of many players, not least Romelu Lukaku . It is the challenge of screwing more money out of another elite club, the challenge of racking up higher wages and a sizeable signing-on fee, the challenge of a lighter workload in an easier league.

He doesn't fancy trying to restore Manchester United to the pinnacle of English football next season, or even the top four. He's not up for balancing Thursday night fixtures in Europe with domestic consistency, or helping shape a new team under Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, maybe even as captain.

Paul Pogba isn't interested in trying to justify the £ 89million Manchester United spent on him

CARABAO CUP DRAW

The draw for the first round of the Carabao Cup will take place at Morrison's supermarket in Colindale, with Ray Parlor, on Thursday. Of course it will.

These are all significant challenges, but Pogba isn't interested.

And he has already pulled off one impressive challenge. That of fooling some of the people, most of the time.

Manchester United chief executive Ed Woodward, for instance. If, as is believed, United are willing to increase Pogba's wage to close on £ 500,000 a week, deception is one challenge he has mastered.

United came sixth last season, won nothing again, tailed off at a crucial stage and ended in uproar, losing at home to relegated Cardiff City. How can one of the leading protagonists in an underwhelming campaign merit an annual pay rise of £ 10m?

If United were thinking straight, Pogba's assessment of his form would be considered delusional. They would call in the shrinks, not the accountants.

"After everything that happened, with my season being my best season as well, I think it could be a good time to have a new challenge somewhere else," Pogba told reporters in Japan.

The 26-year-old French midfielder's problem has long leg a belief in his own publicity

Best season? Well, given his form in previous campaigns, that really isn't saying much. It is like being considered the most appealing candidate in the battle for the Conservative leadership, or the most intellectually rigorous contestant on Love Island.

Fishing in a pretty murky pool.

Pogba has been nothing like an £ 89m player since coming to Manchester United. And now, having a glimpse of potential shown, he wants to leave?

Pogba's problem has long been a belief in his own publicity. His fellow professionals put him in the PFA team of the season last year, but that was as much an accident or timing as an endorsement. The votes are cast early, at a stage in the season coinciding with Pogba's peak during Solskjaer's honeymoon period.

Had the voting duties place after the campaign ended, it is unlikely he would have made the starting XI. He certainly wouldn't have featured in the two proper teams of the English season – Manchester City and Liverpool.

Pogba was inside the Premier League's top 10 for goals (13) and assists (nine) – yet more than half of his goals were penalties and his passing success rate did not place him among the Premier League's top 80, which is unhelpful for the creative midfield force at one of the best clubs in the country. So numbers do not tell the whole story.

Pogba played the most wonderful long pass to set up the goal that beat Tottenham at Wembley – yet in too many of United's other matches against elite opposition he was ineffectual and his work rate was often poor. Pogba wants to be a special case, but then he needs to be special.

More than half of Pogba's goals this season were penalties – numbers don The tell the whole story

All that makes him stand out in the wider context is his ability to create trouble for Manchester United. This latest controversy has blown up a personal promotional trip east for adidas. United may well ask what's in it for them.

If reports of the asking price are accurate, £ 133m. Yet there is little chance Real Madrid will pay that, or much like it. More plausible is that Pogba will become a gigantic plague this summer, in an attempt to try United's patience and leave at a reduced rate.

This is a familiar strategy, one that often works. If United puts an improved offer before Pogba and he turns them down, they will know what the closed season holds. The challenge will be all theirs, preventing Pogba capping his 'best' campaign by utterly derailing theirs.

FURY'S CIRCUS DID NOT RING TRUE

In the bubble that exists around major sports, it is possible to imagine you are invested in something huge. Boxing, in particular, is brilliant at that. The hoopla around Tyson Fury's fight in Las Vegas was captivating and promoters are masters at making their event seem like the center of the universe. Yet in Monterey – which can be reached from Vegas in little more time than it takes to fly London to Manchester – we couldn't find it anywhere.

Even the sports bar voted the city's best 16 years in a row offered nothing. So, reduced to viewing on a mobile phone, perhaps some of the nuances or Fury's performance passed us by. Yet, these eyes, and those of the others watching, saw a boxer who moved very well and did his job swiftly and efficiently and an opponent who was out of his class and at times little more than a straight man.

And while Fury's showmanship is not in doubt, any show worth seeing – certainly any show worth paying for – usually lasts longer than five minutes, unless Usain Bolt is involved. If he fights Deontay Wilder, it's interesting. Until then, there's better on the other channels.

The hoopla around Tyson Fury's fight against Tom Schwarz in Las Vegas was captivating

DUMB AND DUMBER FROM UEFA

Not long ago, the lunacy of a third-place play-off at the UEFA Nations League finals was highlighted in this column. Not everyone felt negatively about it. The players earn lots of money, they can be worked until they throat from exhaustion, argued some.

Had they not qualified, England would still be playing two matches at this stage of the season in European Championship qualifiers, argued others – ignoring that a qualifier is a necessary game and a third-place play off is not.

Anyway, having watched a tired, goalless 90 minutes, followed by a lifeless blank or 30 minutes, plus a penalty shoot -out that redefined the concept of pointlessness, UEFA president Aleksander Ceferin has reached the startling conclusion that it was a colossal waste of time and should be scrapped.

"Players are tired," he said, as if these were circumstances that could not be foreseen. "It's the end of the season, they want a vacation, they're not fully focused."

It's not the players that need focus, mind, but UEFA. They need to be focused on less stupidity in the future. Smart chance of that as, with his next breath, Ceferin once again attempted to justify having the Europa League climax in Baku. He used the well-rehearsed, stunningly foolish logic, that if two Azerbaijani teams had reached a final at Wembley, there would not have been the same level of complaint. As if this could happen realistically.

Aleksander Ceferin concluded that the Nations League third place play-off was a waste of time

Last season, four teams from Azerbaijan were involved in the Europa League – three entered in the first qualifying round and exited it, too, while Qarabag made the group stage, where they came bottom – goal difference minus 11. After July 19, there was no possibility of an all-Azerbaijani final.

Indeed, since the Europa League was founded, in season 2009-10, only once have two Azerbaijani clubs progressed to the group stage . Both finished bottom of their groups, meaning the chances of thousands of Azerbaijani football fanatics proving UEFA's point by remaining cheerful in the face of an inconvenient trip to Wembley, is a scenario as likely to be tested as a Champions League final that doubles up as the Bristol derby.

"Whenever we have complaints, you don't help yourself in your popularity within European football with that," added Ceferin, like it was a threat.

In other words, dumbfly accept every dumb decision made by dumb UEFA officials or we won't like you.

A BUCKET LIST OF A GOLF COURSE

My dad had never been to Anfield. I used to tell him how great it was, particularly on European nights. I said I'd take him if the chance arose and got tickets for a Champions League group game one Tuesday, against Besiktas. You might recall the date: September 11, 2001.

We heard about the attacks half way up the M6, news worsening with every bulletin. There was wild speculation about planes heading towards London, too. Amazingly, European games went ahead. Dad experienced Anfield, but not the way I had hoped. It was the quietest, flattest atmosphere I have known inside a football ground.

No one wanted to be there – not the teams, not the fans, not us, really. Everyone's thoughts were elsewhere. Dad still said he loved it, but he's a police man. He must have known it is not the same.

We build up these places, these cathedrals of sport, in our minds, sometimes unreasonably. When I told people how excited I was covering a golf tournament at Pebble Beach, I was surprised by some of the reactions. A few folk said I would be let down.

Popular US Open venue Pebble Beach is a bucket list of a course – it was breathtaking

"It's four great holes and the rest are ordinary," I was told. Having been there now, I'd say it's the opposite. Four ordinary holes and the rest are astonishing. If they're not on the Pacific Ocean, there is usually a view of it. I walked the full 18 on Thursday afternoon and it was breathtaking, no matter the leaden skies that have a fixture these last five days.

It's a bucket list of a course, also for a player like Tiger Woods, who must have been there a hundred times, but would occasionally just pause to look around.

It is wonderful partnership, too. Not just the great occasion, but the geography of the California coastline as much part of the drama as the golf itself.

As for Dad, he won't get to Pebble Beach, but he returned to Anfield on August 17, 2017. Liverpool 4 Arsenal 0. It's fair to say he's seen it now.

THIS IS WHY MEDIA MUST SHOW TEETH

Luis Suarez may have been in denial after biting Giorgio Chiellini at the 2014 World Cup, as he claims, but his countrymen did not need to be. In the aftermath of that incident, Oscar Tabarez – Uruguay's coach and figure previously worthy or respect – made a scattergun, 13-minute denunciation of FIFA and, in particular, the English press and was applauded from the room by his country's journalists.

Suarez has now made Tabarez and many compatriots look like fools, by admitting what was known all along. He did it and he knew he did it. This is what happens if unquestioning cheerleaders take over the national media. No checks, no balances.

Judgment, and a lot else, goes out of the window.

Luis Suarez admitted what was known all along after biting Giorgio Chiellini at the World Cup

GOLF'S RANDOM ACTS OF IDIOCY

If you thought cries or 'geddinahole' were annoying, wait until golf's new idiocy seeps into your consciousness. Having reported from three major tournaments in America this summer, I have noticed a new breed or gallery tee-side shouter. The Random.

For a Random, "geddinahole" is too commonplace. If every loudmouth is shouting it and on every hole, how will anyone know when its your loud mouth taking its turn? Thanks to social media and reality television these oafs are evermore convinced that they need to be heard all the time, that their contribution is important and no event is complete without them.

Their need to be personally identified is greater than ever, too. For the Random, this is all about making his – and it is always him, never her – voice audible to the people who are watching at home. He plans in advance, alights on a keyword or phrase and then informs his buddies of his intentions.

There is a new breed or gallery tee-side shouter at the golf golf – known as The Random

'Listen out for me. I'll be the one who shouts "Yabbadabbadoo" at the seventh. " Or 'Holy Moly', or 'shut the door' because you could hear them all at Pebble Beach and a thousand other meaningless catch phrases, a permanent idiot clamor, increasingly mistimed as alcohol took its toll on the hardy remaining brain cells.

Still, if all the unfunniest people in the world are gathered in one place, at least someone, somewhere, should be laughing. Their wives, probably.

Manchester City is Harry Maguire's destination of choice this summer. He should be under no illusions, though, about the exacting standards of the coach. Costly mistakes earned John Stones an arm around the shoulder and the steadfast support of England manager Gareth Southgate. Pep Guardiola witnessed the same and dropped him. As good as he is, Maguire wants to raise his game.

Harry Maguire wants to raise his game if he plays for Pep Guardiola at Manchester City

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#Special case? Manchester United’s Paul Pogba needs to be special to merit that"

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