#subtlety. so much subtlety

[russenoire]

on first watch as an anime-only, i remember feeling like ritsu kageyama's descent into evil in episode seven needed a little more air, more space to breathe. i... no longer do. if that slide down the slippery slope feels a bit sudden, there is a reason; and if you know what to look for, it's not actually all that sudden. bear with me here.

from the first episode, the anime sets ritsu up as shigeo's kind, solicitous younger brother. we don't see much of him for the first three episodes, but when we do, he's making bids for shigeo’s attention: helpfully straightening his spoon when it bends and deposits a bite of his dinner on the dining table; noting that he seems out of it and offering himself up as a confidant at least twice; checking in on him in the morning so they can both leave on time. (i actually love the anime for doing this. ritsu doesn't even show up as a character until maybe the middle of the manga's second volume?) except for the spoon, shigeo gently turns him down every time.

and yet. the interview ichi mezato snags with ritsu in episode four confirms a distance between the kageyama boys. you are not seeing things here. he initially refuses her desire for detailed information about shigeo’s powers, only indulging her to find out what shigeo’s been up to. ritsu holds those powers in such awe that he uses a rather hyperbolic phrase to describe shigeo for her: '世界の基本', or sekai no kihon, literally the standard for [his] world.

after he coldly walks out on her, she reviews what little she’s gleaned from their chilly meeting: he's hawt, at the top of his class, athletic, very popular... all things his older brother decidedly is not. the story establishes a duality here between ritsu’s image—indirectly revealed through mezato’s notes—and the reality of ritsu, sat hunched across from her, sullen, barely tolerating her until she coughed up the information she promised him. later on that evening, we see just how deep ritsu's awe goes... or rather, how snared up it is in resentment and envy as he attempts in vain to bend a spoon, just like shigeo did when they were younger. all the trophies of others’ esteem already gathering dust on his shelves don’t mean shit if he can’t have this.

ritsu intercepts shigeo as he leaves for class the next morning: no student council meeting, so an opportunity to actually talk to him. this is rare, his brother notes. and of course dimple is haunting shigeo. when the specter comments on their apparent closeness, the boy side-eyes him hard. this can easily be read two ways: ‘why the hell are you talking to me when no one else can see you?’ and ‘man, fuck you for sticking the knife in deeper.’ ritsu doesn’t ask about the cult meeting here or ever in the entire series. was he really all that interested in mezato’s news? no, he only wants to know why his brother doesn’t use his powers anymore. and this is the first time they’ve talked about this.

it’s such a neat little mystery, these breadcrumbs the story leaves for us until ritsu’s formal introduction in episode six. even though they share the same home and appear to be on friendly terms, the kageyama brothers may as well live on opposite sides of the planet. we don’t even get a sense of why this state of affairs exists until episode five, where teru chokes the breath out of shigeo and his pissed-off soul levels teru’s school before catapulting him into the stratosphere to reflect on his sins: several years prior, shigeo nearly killed ritsu (and possibly ended three much older boys) in an accident neither boy understands; fragments of memory flash before his eyes as his consciousness shorts out.

‘brother, you’re home late, sopping wet. here’s a towel. are you hungry? you seem down; is everything OK? if you need to talk, i’m here for you.’

instead of turning down this bid for connection like all the rest and turning inward again, shigeo actually opens up. he apologizes for the accident—for the first time—then asks for some clarity, since his memories of it are broken. and ritsu clenches the knob to his brother’s bedroom door tighter. he lies to his face, tells him to ‘get over it already.’ this after asking shigeo to confide in him again, no less: too terrified to be honest with him, too used to being shot down. this boy is soaking in fear he has no context for, and he heads downstairs to soak in it alone. shigeo at least has reigen to process his own fears with, though he never trusts the man enough to take full advantage.

ritsu has no one.

he’s already keeping up appearances at home and has been for years; over the course of the spring cleaning big cleanup arc, we learn the extent to which he’s been doing so at school.

(all those expectations of him weighing him down for so long… he can’t hold out forever.)

student council vice president tokugawa calls him out on trying to melt into the scenery like his brother; his considerable gifts make that impossible. said gifts, however, are so ego-dystonic for him that they’re yet another part of Ritsu Kageyama’s Big Lie. the academically-gifted, popular sprinter so many of his fellow students swoon over isn’t real: why does everyone praise him for things anyone could do? he doesn’t actually have friends, just associates. who cares about charisma? why does everyone think he’s perfect when the only thing he truly wants will never be his? and why does his locker leak chocolate every valentine’s day?

gentle reader. are you still wondering why he snaps when he finally gets his wish? and why it looks the way it does?

[souvenir116]

The way he couldn't take his eyes off Max, not even for a second...

[soft-pine]

people will be like looking for subtle evidence for queer dean like oh he's in bisexual lighting here, he's referencing this niche queer media there.

meanwhile dean is just like "he was my gay thing" no further elaboration.

[vaguely-concerned]

I really really like that lucanis reaches the 'there must be some way through this' realization 'off camera', so to speak, while presumably looking at rook explaining the situation to spite. it just. hits right. he gets that moment to himself after 'this place is a nightmare, why would I want to stay here' to come back into focus, to gather himself and think it through in peace, outside of the demands of anyone’s gaze (including the player’s!), while rook takes care of spite’s confusion and urgency and distress as he can’t himself in this shattered state. they're inside his soul, but he still gets that moment of privacy, with rook and spite there and supporting but not intruding. idk there's just something so good and right-feeling about it. rook's presence in lucanis' mind at its most vulnerable and frozen could have felt SO invasive if the quest wasn't written as skillfully as it is, and I get skeeved out by that kind of thing incredibly easily so it's a testament to how well it's done that it always feels safe and supportive. lucanis has had both his bodily and psychological (slash spiritual/existential) integrity and autonomy violated so brutally and repeatedly, and having even the way the camera perceives him here grant him the dignity and respect and privacy of soul he hasn’t experienced in a long time… it’s a whole thing huh. No wonder it’s taken me a while to put it into words lol 

(also what a contrast to what solas and rook have got going on, and what a sly way to slide the point of comparison in there to build to the thematic whole. the solas version of this IS of course wildly invasive and skeeves me out but in the intended delighted horror movie way. solas, too, was let into someone’s soul through the cracks in the wake of a traumatic event, and he IMMEDIATELY sought to turn it to his own benefit and use that trauma as a weapon against them fhdsja I’m sorry but it’s just such a character-revealing instinct for him to act on without hesitation and I love how terrible he is, it’s all so unforgivably premeditated and consistent.

rook acting out of the desire to make sure lucanis is ok vs. solas going ‘well. When life gives you oops killed my friend, make dead friend poisoned lemonade and make his loved ones drink it. this sunk cost fallacy isn’t going to perpetuate itself’ is such a neat contrast and it’s not in your face about it but it’s still there, deep and solid down in the thematic narrative. rook doesn’t do anything to or in lucanis’ mind, really — they negotiate their way through the layers of defense and are let through, and they help him make the whole thing more explicable, but they never exert any force or go rooting around for anything that doesn’t present itself to them first. solas goes about gathering ammo for when he's going to nothing personel kid this person from like the first moment fhdskh doesn't waste a second before he's on that gaslight gatekeep girlboss grind. the fact that the game goes out of its way to show there IS a respectful, non-selfish and kind version of this process makes what solas is doing even more deliciously awful (glee) and rook and lucanis’ relationship (platonic, romantic, whatever it might be in any given playthrough) all the more moving to me)

[caeruleosanguine]

[that-ineffable-devil]

I've praised George Rextrew a lot for the emotion he put behind various actions, and I stand by that.

But I also want to take a moment to appreciate Jayden Revri's ability to handle Charles' more explosive emotions.

In the Devlin house, you watch his anguish and anger build in equal measure. Unlike the characters, we get to see the build-up to the outburst that leads to him getting stuck in the loop. The first time he sees that man murder his family he wants to look away, he tries to look away. You can see how much it hurts him, but he turns back and watches anyway--and the horror turns to rage.

When the Night Nurse comes, he fights her off--very aggressively yes, but they didn't see what he did when she took him into his memories--and everyone looks at him like...like he's a bomb that may go off again? Like they've never seen him before?

The boy's just been through some of his most traumatic memories and committed an act of violence that probably only made that experience worse, and he sees his friends looking at him the way he'd always feared they would--like he's a bad guy. And Jayden portrays that grief and pain so beautifully.

And when he gives that little "no" while he's crying and jerks away from Edwin's outstretched hand?

My heart feels like it's been squashed and wrung out.

[sunburstsandmoonshadows]

OK ONE MORE RELATIVITY SWAP.

Bill (+Silas) and Gideon!

Thoughts below:

Silas, aka Bill: A boy around the twins' age who claims to be a psychic and miracle worker, curing the ills of those who come to his shows. Sixer believes his powers at once, though Stanley dismisses him as just as much a fake as their mother. He astonished to learn that Silas's powers are real--though his claim that he was born with them is a lie. He really shouldn't be alive; when he was young he almost died from a head injury, but as he lay dying he made a deal with a strange being who came to him in his dreams and now helps him fake his psychic abilities. It also helped him steal a pin that allows him to briefly remove ailments, though it doesn't last. He draws triangles everywhere, and would've carved one into his skin if his parents let him near the kitchen knives for long enough. Sometimes insists that 'friends' call him Bill instead of Silas for some reason.

The Gleeful King: A fae being that the elder Pines twins worked with in their study of Gravity Falls. He helped set in motion Dipper being lost into the in between of realities by withholding important information from the twins regarding a ritual they wanted to attempt and document. It was in service of a plan to make Mabel agree to be his bride for the return of her brother, but luckily she realized it was a trick and that she had other options to do it on her own. He hasn't been seen on the mortal plane for a couple decades, but perhaps with the arrival of more Pines to encounter, he may try his tricks again…

I feel like if you're gonna swap Bill with anyone, it may as well be the other magic weirdo who's way too obsessed with a Pines. I think Bill in this au could go two ways. Option one is that he has the same goals as Canon Bill but he can't find an ideal scientist for his next iteration of a portal right now, so he's made a deal with Silas to slowly start building up a cult following to turn into a real cult. He's got the free time.

The other option (aka my preferred one) is that Bill/Silas also takes the narrative position of Gideon, a villain who is more annoying than truly harmful by the end. In which case this Bill basically end up being the Bill presented to the audience the first time he shows up: an amoral, very strange demon who encourages the worst impulses of those he contracts with, but otherwise is like… almost chill. Will just give up on his evil plot if he gets too annoyed. Still be a demon, but he just wants to hang out in the 3d world and mess with humans, no plans for destroying anything. At most he wants attention and worship, which would be hard to get if, say, a more intense and destructive magical being started messing with Gravity Falls. He thinks that those other Bills who go around destroying dimensions are clearly just compensating for something.

And if you're wondering why Gideon looks so drastically different in this world compared to his canon counterpart. Well. Uh. He doesn't, really.

Tough times for Mabel Pines, local grown woman.

[whenyoulikeandwhereyoulike]

Granada Holmes is actually incredible with the subtle things it contains that you miss upon first watching it. I have watched the part in the Empty House where Holmes returns so many times, and just now have I noticed that when Holmes is comforting Mrs Hudson as he's shushing her he murmurs something that sounds to me like "I know. I know," as he hugs her. How have I not noticed this before now?! It honestly doesn't seem to matter how many times I watch it, I will always pick up on a facial expression or murmured line that I missed every time before and I think that's part of the brilliance of the series. There is so much you miss simply by not paying attention for a few seconds

[lokimobius]

"Listen. That wasn’t tactical. I lost it." LOKI S02E02 “Breaking Brad”

[turtleplushi]

I need to stop drawing them my god

[leonardcohenofficial]

without exaggeration, genius

[hanamukes]

[biscuitboba]

I see people sometimes saying things like "yeah zoro is deeply infatuated but i can't see luffy reciprocating", "luffy is just too ace for me and i just can't imagine him being with anyone:/??"

[Speaking of ace luffy headcanon, begging people to reconstruct their view about ace people cuz it almost sounds like "ace people are incapable of loving/being in a relationship" sometimes:(]

People always talk about roronoa zoro and how he loves (whatever platonic or romantic, you named it) his captain. Because this is by default is the easiest thing to do. It's clear to see. You can see zoro's love, laid bare, palpable throughout the whole series. But honestly, what about luffy?

Disclaimer: these are my takes that are purely based on how i interpret zolu, so like honestly i'm just offering to share some of my (and probably other zolu people too) thoughts(?) about zoro and luffy (specifically luffy)

I think the first thing to establish is that with luffy, it's about the subtlety behind his every actions and words.

The way monkey d. luffy loves

It's about the way luffy understands roronoa zoro. Both zoro and luffy are probably the one that understand each other the most. Both can understand each other ohh so easily, i've talked about this before, here. Throughout the whole one piece you can see them exchanging glances or maybe a few words, or maybe you can even see them understanding each other just by reading each other's body language! guessing what's on the other person's mind, or what they are about to do. They just get each other. They are also very in sync and compatible (approved by mihawk!!), very comfortable with each other, and happy with each other... and really, that only makes sense, because understanding is such a key element in a relationship! Cause what is love without understanding right??

I'd say it's about the way luffy leans on zoro the most, how he listens to his words, how zoro is his sturdy rock. Luffy is a captain and he is quite prideful, but he is willing to lean on his first mate when he needs it. It's about how zoro's the one that will be strong for him when luffy himself is incapable of doing so, it's about zoro being his number one anchor. (Another 'of course i've talked about it', here).

It's also about how luffy is the one who respects zoro's dream/ambition the most (mihawk, baratie arc). But more importantly it's about how he values zoro as a person. Zoro and all the things that makes zoro, zoro. His principles, his strengths, and even his flaws. (I'm talking about shells town and the things zoro 'showed' (about himself) that made luffy so enamored with him, to the point that he needed to make this person part of his crew)

It's about the way he likes to admire and praise zoro for his skills whenever he can. How he puts so much trust in zoro. Trusting zoro with his crew and undoubtedly also trusting in zoro's strength. Trust in his ability to perform specific task, trust in his ability to lead as the vice captain, trust in his decision making skills, trust his judgement, his insight, and even so, trust in his ability to keep luffy safe (e.g. skypiea, water7, dressrosa, wano, or in every other arcs really)

(About respect, trust, & admiration, i've talked about those things here, here, and here)

At the end of the day, it's about all the little things... all the subtle little things.

It's about how luffy was willing to stay still (for once in his life) to accompany zoro during his wound treatment (here)

It's about the way luffy seeks out his first mate for literally anything.. but especially for all the mundane things (here)

It's about luffy perception of time when it comes to zoro, How he misses him (here)

It's about the way THE monkey d. luffy is willing to share his food with zoro (here)

It's about luffy's disappointment when he realized that zoro wasn't there with him at impel down (here)

It's about the way luffy cried out of worry for zoro (baratie and sabaody, here)

It's about how luffy sometimes uses zoro-tachi when talking about his crewmates (here)

It's about him getting so excited to see zoro again in wano to the point of blushing, it's about him being so worried for zoro in skypiea (after finding zoro's unconscious body) or sabaody arc (before and after zoro vanished), it's about him taking zoro seriously (in enies lobby, punk hazard, dressrosa), it's about him being the happiest and silliest when fighting alongside zoro, it's about the way he likes to annoy/tease zoro, it's the way-

Luffy and zoro's strength are literally the closest thing to equal (compared to the rest of straw hats) and they both equally stink (cuz they rarely bathe) they like to fight, they like to feast, they share braincells, they are very similiar.. but also can't be more different. They clash (personality-wise) but still blend perfectly. They are so compatible that i can't even imagine someone capable of handling them (like i'm talking about 'forever' kind of handling) if that someone isn't one of them??

[quinn-pop]

let’s do some autistic meta knight headcanons!! over explaining my interpretation of meta knight yet again wooooo

this orb has NO idea how to talk to people!!! outside of work anyway. a lot of this is partially due to upbringing (suppressing his emotions all the time) but he does not know how to express emotions, like…at all.

this goes into a few things

1. yeah talking is hard. even after figuring out what he wants to communicate he will struggle. conversation can be so overwhelming, especially under pressure. he will need time lol

2. because of that, forming connections is hard. i really don’t think meta is much for shallow relationships, and certainly not early in the timeline. which also means he has very little experience with friendship. so a lot of the relationships he did have went kinda neglected, and issues that probably could’ve been worked on by talking became…*cough romk* escalated.

3. honestly i wouldn’t be surprised if meta convinced himself he couldn’t feel emotion (anymore) until like. katam-ish. he tried very hard lol

vulnerability is terrifying. (though this gesture here is also just comforting, like his little cape cocoon thing he does.)

unmasking—yeah im taking the mask thing very literally here—is a big deal and a very slow process for mk. i’m sure he has a lot of feelings on that lol. it served as a way to ensure no one could ever, y’know, see him.

i can’t say i think he’d ever fully ditch it—there’s always gonna be some days that are more stressful than others and if having it could help him get through it, it just makes sense. mainly when working.

it really is about vulnerability. granted, i don’t think he has the most expressive face (in my head every astral just tends to stare at things) but i doubt he has much control over it. can’t fake a smile but also can’t hide it. probably blushes easy because yeah, astrals; just look at kirby’s face.

just the idea that someone might be able to read his expression and know what he’s feeling before he’s ready for them to (or even understands it himself…) yeah he doesn’t want that

but emotional turmoil aside, i think his mask also hides a lot of his stims

remember that whole “suppressing your feelings” thing? yeah turns out that ignoring half your instincts isn’t a good idea. so in true meta knight style, he tries to stim as subtly as possible

1. he has the least control over his wings, so they will flick and twitch on their own. they’re usually a good indicator of how he’s feeling, not unlike the body language usually seen in cat ears and tails lol. flapping is also an extension of this of course, though he probably suppresses it more.

2. this also effects when he takes his wings out. pretty much every time he’s excited or nervous it just happens. kinda makes me wonder if his wing cape ordeal might also go into the suppression thing… (i’d say yes, but using a cape is also very comforting so it’s not necessarily a bad thing)

3. going back to the mask thing; he stims a lot underneath it. think like biting or pursing your lips. he bites his tongue and clicks his mouth. that sort of thing. his mask also makes it harder to notice that he is constantly sighing, humming, grumbling…all that

one nice thing about the mask though is that it helps a little bit with lights!!! woo

(look at him and his magically floating glasses)

sensory stuff—i think he’s mostly bothered by light and sound. maybe a bit of texture. he’s pretty sensory avoidant and perfectly happy standing off to the side not touching anything.

the one exception to this is physical affection, which is, despite all of this, most of how he shows affection. it’s a lot easier to hug someone than to try to explain your feelings for them, after all.

i think he would like pressure though. so that’s probably part of it. and i’m pretty sure there’s some connection in here to fighting (dang, is that the only way he knows how to get his energy out?)

anyway, pretty much all of this is in contrast to kirby, who i would gladly nominate as the champion of Doing Whatever He Wants. he might pick up a few bad habits, but he will never mask the way meta knight does. he might not understand how he feels, but he’s in tune enough to express it…usually.

this is a very good thing for meta because it helps him to do the same thing. kirby’s so energetic, it’s hard to not want to stim with him. it reminds meta to be kinder to himself and explore his own emotions. he can also help kirby understand themselves, so this connection is very important.

yeah, at the end of the day, everything kinda just boils down to kirby and mk as parallels

this is the conclusion i promise

to me, meta’s arc is about growing stronger by growing kinder, and this is mostly by learning to be kind to himself. letting himself be a person again, loving and understanding other people, and eventually, letting go of all the expectations placed on him and doing the things he’s always wanted to do…

autism headcanons are fun for me because it’s cathartic to write, but at the same time, it just makes sense in this sort of narrative. meta is, to me, inseparable from these things. and so is kirby! that’s a dynamic that’s a lot of fun to play with, and it’s at the heart of my kirby interpretation.

if you actually read all this WOW thank you

[viperbunnies]

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TATO 🎂🐍🐰 !!!! (help i planned this in advance but i still managed to be late 😭 anyways shoutout to the first ever ask i sent you, i hope i did ozml justice 😤🫶)

(i fear i dont have my usual zest rn hgsdklhld but i really wanted to get this to you asap 💥) ANYWAYS thank you for deciding to join the twst community and being such a fun presence sharing with us your art and your ocs, you're incredibly talented!! 💥💥💥💖💕💕💗 i appreciate you LOTS 🥺💕 thank you for being such a great friend too, and i wish you all the best 😤🫶💖💕‼️

I'm die thank you foreva 😭😭 (/ref)

The scream I let out when I initially saw this hshsh Omg Ian I am so speechless 😭😭 you cooked so hard hshs

🥺🥺 and ahh the first ask you sent me aaa I remember it so well! Thank you for showing interest in my silly ships and for being an active supporter of my blog (even when I know that you're so busy you always find time to support me and other people as well! It's honestly so amazing and I want to have the same drive as you someday 🥺❤️)

Thank you so much for your warm greetings! And this lovely art you made for me 🥺 I'll treasure it for years to come (this will be my family's heirloom now) I appreciate you so much as well! And thank you for being a kind friend and welcomine me into the community ❤️

[apocalyptichearts]

"sound familiar?"

credits – anne sexton, a self-portrait in letters || unknown || @/grossgirl on tumblr || gaston leroux, the phantom of the opera || richard siken, crush || @/rubyetc