#ted lasso source

[military-newsboys]

Buck: Eds, if you die, do you want to be buried or cremated? Like, if you were hit by a bus today, what do I do?

Eddie: Go after the bus driver and make him pay for what he did to me.

Eddie: Avenge me, Buck. Avenge me!

Buck: I found this company, and they bury you in a biodegradable sack. So when your body decomposes, it fertilizes the seeds of a fruit tree.

Buck: That's what I want. Because then you and all the people that love me can eat the fruit from my tree.

Eddie: That is fucking mental

Buck: Coming from the guy that wants me to ruin a bus driver's life just 'cause he killed you swerving to avoid a child!

Eddie: I didn't know about the fucking child!

[batfamgalore]

*After Jason and Bruce get into a huge fight*

Dick: What did you do?

Jason: What do you think I did?

Dick: Punched him. Headbutted him.

Jason: Keep going.

Dick: Did you murder him?

Jason: No. Worse. I fucking forgave him. It’s disgusting, isn’t it?

[incorrect-mha]

Ochako: Everything okay, Deku?

Deku: Uh, Eri got bullied at school this morning.

Iida: *Gasp* If we leave right now and take the connecting flight through Kyoto, we can be in Tokyo by noon, and that punk's house will be in ashes by 12:30!

Bakugo: No, no. Best thing you can do with bullies is ignore them.

Deku:

Ochako:

Iida:

Bakugo: Then you sneak into their house at 4:00 a.m., which, statistically speaking, is the hour people are least prepared to defend themselves.

Todoroki: *nods knowingly* Correct.

Bakugo: And once you're standing over them, as they sleep in their bed, you start to beat them. With a thick, heavy rope soaked in red paint. Pummeling them over and over until they wake, confusing the paint for their own blood. When they beg you to stop, you laugh as loud as you can, for as long as you can.

Iida: [Gulps]

Bakugo: And then you start to beat them again.

Ochako: [Drops mug]

Deku: Mmm. Yeah. You know, I may just hold off on anything like that until I connect with Mirio and just get the details, see what actually happened.

Bakugo: Yeah, all right. Yeah, fair enough.

Deku: But, thank you…?

[grizzlyofthesea]

"A Renaissance Painting of Masculine Melancoly"

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Steve: Okay, Buck, you won’t like this, but at the moment, Sam is actually being the more mature one.

Sam: Yeah I’m being super mature you big, dumb, hairy, baby twat!

[incorrectquotesfromthelighthouse]

Crow!Rook: Viago, if you die, do you want to be buried or cremated? Like, if you were hit by a carriage today, what do I do? Viago: Go after the carriage driver and make him pay for what he did to me. Avenge me, Rook.

[curtis-brothers-hug]

Darry: “Pony got bullied at school today.”

Gang: “-beat the tar outta them!” “-I’ll start the car-“ “-they’ll be sorry-“

Darry: “no no, best thing you can do with bullies is ignore them.”

Gang (various reactions): “????” “😤” “🙄”

Darry: “then you sneak into their house at 4 am. Which statistically speaking is the hour people are least prepared to defend themselves.” (Dally: “correct.”) “Once you’re standing over them, as they sleep in their bed…….you start to beat them. With a thick, heavy, rope…..soaked in red paint. Pummeling them. Over. And over. Until they wake, confusing the paint for their own blood. When they beg you to stop, you laugh. As loud as you can. For as long as you can. And then………………you start to beat them again.”

Gang: “…………………..”

Darry: “welp, guess I better call Pony’s teacher and get all the details. Yes hello, may I please speak to Mrs Miller? Pleasure to meet you, ma’am. My name is Darrel Curtis, and I’m the concerned guardian of one of the students in your honors class……….”

[caslutz]

Jamie: I think I'm dating Roy.

Keeley: What?

Jamie: I'm not sure. It's just a possibility. I could be wrong.

Keeley: But how? When?

Jamie: Well, we spent the entirety of Ted and Trent’s wedding together and it was really nice and we had a really good time. We laughed a lot and we ate and then we danced.

Keeley: Danced? How? Was it a fast dance? Slow dance?

Jamie: It was a slow dance, a waltz. Roy can waltz.

Keeley: Roy can waltz?

Jamie: Roy can waltz. 😏

Keeley: …Look how you just said 'Roy can waltz.’

Jamie: What? I'm just saying, I'm surprised that Roy can waltz.

Keeley: That sounded more like 'I'm surprised I still have my clothes on.’

[incorrectafcrichmond]

Jamie: Why are girls allowed to say girlfriend to refer to a platonic friend, but I can't say this is my boytoy twink malewife Colin?

Roy: You could if you weren't a fucking coward.

[incorrect-spiderverse]

Miguel: "What the fuck is your problem?"

The rest of the spider-gang : *Awkward silence*

Pavitr, out of nowhere : "Oh! wait, I know this one! It’s you!"

Hobie:*high fives Pavitr*

[shyjusticewarrior]

Red Hood Incorrect Quotes Pt 80

Rose: Jason, if you die, do you want to be buried or cremated? Like, if you were hit by a bus today, what do I do?

Jason: Go after the bus driver and make him pay for what he did to me. Avenge me, Rose, avenge me!

[lumonlyman]

i’ve been clearing out old screenshots in my camera roll but i have ted lasso brain rot so you all have to see what they made me think of (part one. more posts)

[batfamgalore]

Jason: And then, at the gala Tim told Bruce that I was the one who broke the vase.

Dick: And he’s still alive?

Jason: Yeah. Instead of beating him to death, I fucking forgave him. I’m still fucking furious about it.

[incorrect-mha]

Deku: Kacchan, if you die, do you want to be buried or cremated? Like, if you were hit by a bus today, what do I do?

Bakugo: Go after the bus driver and make him pay for what he did to me. Avenge me, Izuku. Avenge me!

Deku:

Bakugo: This funeral is really messing with your head, innit?

Deku: I found this company, and they bury you in a biodegradable sack. So when your body decomposes, it fertilizes the seeds of a fruit tree. That's what I want. Because then you and all the people that love me can eat the fruit from my tree.

Bakugo: That is fucking mental.

Deku: Coming from the man that wants me to ruin a bus driver's life just 'cause he killed you swerving to avoid a child.

Bakugo: I didn't know about the fucking child.

[milfloverobisanya]

rebecca: higgins and i have this kind of easy chemistry where we finish each other's — higgins: —sentences. rebecca: please, don't interrupt me.

[glassnightfury]

Hiccup, going through his own personal crisis: You ever been to a therapist, Heather?

Heather: What for? I can diagnose myself in a heartbeat. I thought being invulnerable would protect me so I pushed people away for years, leading me directly to my greatest fear: being alone. Big whoop.

Hiccup: Big whoop.