#that is a big chunk of tiny text...

[elle-p]

Dengeki Playstation Vol.353 Persona 3 part pictures and transcription.

『ペルソナ3』とは新世界。『ペルソナ』シリーズは、前作にあたる『ペルソナ2罪』『ぺルソナ2罰』で1つの完結を迎えた。本作『3』は、世界観こそ同じものの、これまでのシリーズとは異なる舞台、異なる物語で描かれることとなる。それを表すように、これまで『ペルソナ』シリーズだけでなく、多くの『女神転生』シリーズでキャラクターデザインを手がけてきた金子一馬氏から福島成記氏にデザインをシフト。福島氏は今までの『ペルソナ』シリーズではゲーム画面中のキャラクター絵を手掛け、『ステラデウス』では幻想的なデザインで好評を博しているアトラスファンならなじみの深いデザイナーだ。仲魔のデザインなど『女神転生』らし��を残しつつも、これまでとは異なる、まさにシリーズとしての新世界の扉を開いたのである。『ペルソナ3』は日常と非日常の物語。舞台となるのは、美しい海ぞいの土地「港区」。港区は、新旧2つの風景をあわせ持っている。陸地側にあるのは、古くからの港街「旅戸白 (いわとだい)」。海を隔てて反対側にあるのは、新興の人工島「房已ポートアイランド」。そしてボートアイランドの中心には、島の竣工理由の1つでもある小中高一貫の名門校、「私立・月光館学園」が建っている。主人公や仲間たちは、厳戸台にある学生寮からボートアイランドにある学園へと、モノレールを経由して日々追うことになる。しかし⋯⋯彼らの青春には “光” だけが待ちうける訳ではない。世界には、じつは1日と1日の狭間に “普通ではない” 時間帯⋯⋯“影時間 (かげじかん)” が存在している。それは毎晩午前0時になると訪れ、しばらく続いたのち明ける。影時間が始まると、普通の人間は棺に似た形の結晶状のオブジェに変わり、その間のことを何も感じられなくなる (これを “象徴化”という)。そのため、影時間は世の中のほとんどの人にとって “ないのと同じ” であり、誰もその存在に気づいていない。自由に動けるのは、影時間の本来の住人⋯⋯ “シャドウ” と呼ばれる怪物たちのみ。極まれに、影時間に “象微化” しない人間もいる。彼らは異形の影時間におびえ、そしてシャドウに抵抗することもできず、精神を食われてしまう。精神を食われた人間は、影時間が明けたあとには無気力状態になってしまう。だが⋯⋯主人公と仲間たちは、その影時間の中で行動しうる “適正” を見出される。やがてそれぞれの内に目覚める、シャドウを滅ぼす唯一の力 “ペルソナ能力”。かくして彼らは、昼には友だちや先輩後輩として学園生活を送りつつ、夜にはともに戦う同士として、影時間のシャドウに挑んでゆくことになる。『ペルソナ3』は神話の象徴。主人公たちには、“ペルソナ” と呼ばれる自身の影を具現化する力がある。ペルソナなくして影時間の住人シャドウと戦うことはできないのである。ぺルソナは、人の心が1人1つであるように、原則として1人1体しか持つことができない。しかし、主人公だけは複数のペルソナを付け替えることができる。なぜ、主人公だけが複数のペルソナを持つことができるのか？そして、人の心を映すペルソナとは一体なんなのか？近いうちにそれら疑問の答えを導くことができるかもしれない⋯⋯。『ペルソナ3』は学園生活。プレイヤーは主人公を通して、「月光館学園」という学校を舞台とした学園生活を送ることになる。朝起きて登校し、授業を受けて放課後を迎える。誰もが1度は過ごす学校という空間での生活。誰もが通るゆえに、親しみや懐かしさという気持ちも強く持つことができる、 そんな舞台だ。『ペルソナ3』では、そんな学園生活での日常が、影時間という非日常の世界に大きな影響を与えることになる。『ペルソナ3』は絆。登校するなか、放課後の街中、さまざまな人々と出会いかかわりを持つ主人公。さらに、学校という空間ではクラスメートや先輩後輩、はたまた教師と、より多くの人と多くのつながりを持つことになる。人とのつながる糸は最初こそ細くもろいものだが、関係が深くなるにつれ、その糸は太く確かなものになり、やがては “絆” になる。そして絆をつむぐことこそが『ペルソナ3』における大きな目的のである。絆は仲間のペルソナの力の糧となり、主人公を助けてくれることだろう。学園での生活は、1年365日続く。1年という期間は、春があり夏を過ぎ秋を通り冬へと至る道。季節によって、また季節ごとのイベントによって絆をつむぐ手段は変わり、絆をつなぐ相手も変わる。誰もが通る学校での生活、誰もが経験する人とのかかわり。『ペルソナ3』特集の幕は、この学園生活の魅力をひもとくところから始めよう。誰もが通るがゆえに近く、誰もが通り過ぎるがゆえに遠い思春期の思い出。ペルソナという、誰もが持ち得ることなき力を手にした少年たちは、どのような学園生活を送るのか？プレイヤーはその学園生活を通して何を感じるのか？今現在、学園生活を送っている人も、すでに学園生活を終えた人も、『ペルソナ3』という新たな学園の門はすぐそこに開いている。その門をくぐろうとしているのは、あなた自身の意思？それともあなたの内に潜むもう1つの⋯⋯。

Are you enjoying school life?

PERSONA3

PS2 RPG JULY,13 RELEASE

ATLUS

7,140 yen(PRETAX)

ATLUS DENGEKI PLAYSTATION

"P3"COMING UP DPS on 23 June.

Are you enjoying school life?

クラスメートとくだらない話題で盛り上がったり、イタズラをして先生に怒られたり⋯⋯『ペルソナ3』の1日はそんな当たり前の日常。当たり前の日常だからこそ、誰もが強く共感でき、深く感情移入できる。そんな日常を表す「コミュニティ」と「絆」、2つの新システムから本作の平凡な日々をピックアップしてお届けする。

Community

コミュニティ

母親から生まれてきた時点で、人は生まれながらに “誰か” とかかわりを持って生きている。親、兄弟、友人、先輩、後輩、恩師、上司、恋人。人は人生において、さまざまな自分ではない他人と出会う。キミはこの世界で、どんな “コミュニティ” を築くことになるのだろうか？

Bonds

絆

かかわりを持った人との間には何かしらの絆が生まれる。人はその絆をたぐり、頼り、そして信じて毎日をすごしていく。はじめは細く弱い絆でも、やがては断ち切りがたい恩愛、離れがたい情へと移り代わる。人を想う力が絆となり、その絆が力となる。絆であふれたこの世界から、キミはどの糸を手繰り寄せ、どんな力を手に入れるのか――?

それは日常の学園生活

登校

朝は学園に向かう登校風景から始まる。遅刻は許されない!？

授業

学生の本分は勉学。授業中に答えを聞かれる、なんてことも当然ありそう。その答えによっては⋯？

放課後

放課後になれば学校を飛び出して街へ。そこでは、学園関係者以外の人との出会いが待っているかも。

“影時間”

そして1日の狭間、影時間へ。そこで待ち受ける者とは⋯⋯？

次の1日へ

『ペルソナ3』1日のスクールライフ

▲日常のなかに用意された会話によって、コミュニティが成長していく。

▲学園内だけでなく、放課後に街へ出てコミュニティを広げることも可能だ。

本作の特徴は、登校、授業、放課後と日常の学園生活を送ることで進行していくという点。そのなかで、クラスメートや教師、街の人などとの関係、“コミュニティ” を深めることが目的になる。ただ1つ日常と異なるのは、1日と1日の間に “影時間” と呼ばれる時間があることだが⋯⋯？

プレイヤーの力は絆

コミュニティを深め、強くなった絆は、本作に欠かせないシステム「ペルソナ」の力になる。つまり、日常の行動が夜の戦闘へ大きな影響を与えることに。昼間と夜が密接に関係しているのだ。

▼コミュニティは20種類以上存在。それは、ペルソナの属性にも影響を与える。

仲間との絆

コミュニティは、学校や街の人と会話することで発現し、仲よくなることでレベルアップする。戦闘の仲間だけでなく、あらゆる人と絆を築くことで主人公は力を得ることになる。

ペルソナとの絆

コミュニティで得た絆は、ペルソナの経験値へと変換���れる。コミュニティには属性があるので、どのペルソナを強化するかで人との付き合いが変わるかも？

Are you enjoying school life?

すべては6/23発売の電撃PSで明らかに！

アトラスと電プレの強力タッグで、『ペルソナ 3』の魅力を深く掘り下げていくこの企画。システムの詳細、設定の謎などは、すべてゲーム発売間近の6/23日売りの本誌で、総特集を組んでお送りする予定だ。そして、次回6/9売りの本誌では、日常のなかの非日常 “影時間” をテーマに、戦闘、ペルソナの魅力に迫っていく！

▶“影時間” とはなんなのか？そして気になるベルソナとは？次号で非日常の扉が開かれる！

影時間？

ペルソナ!？

NEXT

Do you know Shadow Time?

『ペルソナ3』を応援するページ

[alchemiclee]

i'm planning to do my firefly cosplay pulling stream tonight. wanted to do star rail themed gartic phone for at least half an hour before pulls, but can't get at least 2 more people to join me 😭 what should I do instead, so stream isn't just 10 minutes long? should i do silly goofy doodles? try to work on my firefly art I still have barely touched? i'm not sure. I hate when my plans don't work because people suck!!!!!!!!!😭😭😭😭

[lsunstreakerl]

Oh my god I want to hug them so bad and wrap them in blankets it‘s unreal 😭.

Compilation of my favourite moments in no particular order:

Max basically saying „I don‘t care if Alex moves in, just don‘t fuck next to me“

Christians unprofessional behaviour (wanting to comfort a teenager)

Christians and Totos reaction to the fact that Max still has the Duct Tape BootsTM

Christian trying to not freak out (and kinda failing) when he realizes that Max is related to Jos and is possibly without any type of legal care taker.

Max teasing George about his crush/more-than-friends-feelings for Alex

Max and George being so siblings its killing me fr. They hate each other sometimes but they hold each other so dear I‘m gonna cry

Helping each other with the contracts for driving and sponsors. I can just see them sitting across at a kitchen table and going ham on the clauses.

Max getting a haircut from Pascale

The tiny gax smau post made me think about the possibility that they might be doing the cuddle thing when one of them is feeling like garbage.

Imagine Alex, still at RBR, not doing well in a race and Max texting George to come to Alex' driver room. RBR mechanics being very confused for a second because thats one one of theirs, but then they recognize George and let him be because they know he‘s probably here for Max. Eventually one of them opens the door to Alex' driver room because they haven't opened the door in a few hours and finding them on the floor because the couch isn't big enough for all three of them.

Sorry if it’s long, the brain worms have infected me <3

tiny max is a menace and relentlessly teases george about the way he looks at alex like he hung the stars in the sky. (until they get together and he's like "oh please god go back to how you were before I can't stand it")

christian experiences one (1) emotion that isn't ruthlessness or victory or cutthroat viciousness and immediately decides he just has to die. no other option. why is this wet mop of a child making him feel squishy things where is franz—

christian handles the unwelcome squishy emotions by making them toto's problem also. toto hates it equally as much, and then they find out there's more wet mop children.

baby bull child is bad enough to give christian hives, but finding out said baby bull child doesn't have an adult sends him into anaphylactic shock. a fever dream. a manic episode. he wakes up and realizes he's successfully pitched the idea of a clothing brand to Red Bull.

george is so pathetically obvious and alex is so pathetically oblivious... how could he not make fun of them.

they would take a bullet for each other, but they'd spend the rest of their lives teasing the other for almost getting shot.

contract renewal or new contracts is a whole event in their place. papers all over the kitchen and the living room, constantly going through highlighters, thinking out loud to each other all the time. george works under the table at a local bookshop that lets him use their printer to get all the contracts in physical media, and they let him take highlighters home too! before he got that job, he and max were going to the local library and printing them out in 20 paper chunks at a time to avoid getting in trouble, and it took forever.

pascale saw them get more scruffy with each race and eventually just couldn't take it anymore. the irony of george not eating his sandwich and instead lying to max and giving it to him later, is that if they'd just said that they were hungry, the leclerc's would've fed them both :( but they don't know any better, and the leclerc's still think there's an adult around. (an incredibly absent adult, sure, but they're certainly not thinking that max and george are alone.)

they absolutely still do the cuddle thing when they don't feel well. or when they're stressed, or overwhelmed, or really anything out of the norm! it's a comfort thing. the smau post is when their flight had been delayed, and while everyone else is trying to get comfy on airport chairs, the three of them have slept through worse, and they're very experienced at what's comfortable for them. (because when you've been sharing a bed and a bedroom for as long as they had, it's muscle memory.) it's also kind of nostalgic for them, because at this point they're in a two bedroom place (max and charles aren't together yet), and while max has no issues occasionally invading their bed when he wants comfort, it's not every night like it used to be.

They've also been known to catch power naps during race weekends in weird spots when there's a delay :)

[wandasslut3000]

Welcome home

Pairing: Elizabeth Olsen x Fem!reader

Warnings: Smut 18+, fluff, mommy!kink, semi-clothed sex, pet names, sub!reader, praise, hair tugging, scissoring, cunnilingus, fingering, marking, teasing, choking, long distance relationship?

WC: 2.4k

                 ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Lizzie was coming back home today. She'd been out of state for the past few weeks for her new movie, and although you couldn't be more proud of her, you’d missed your girlfriend painfully.

She'd FaceTime you every night before bed and wake you up with a good morning text.

Sometimes she'll call just to ask how you've been or if you'd eaten yet, always making you smile for how much she cares.

Lizzard🦎💚: Good morning princess, I'm boarding my plane. I can't wait to see you <3

Y/n: Yayy I'm so happy! Text me when you land baby, have a safe flight!

You bring your phone up to your chest, a wave of excitement flowing through you. You head into the kitchen and decide to make yourself breakfast, a simple eggs and toast.

Tapping your feet on the tile floor, you munch happily on your food, humming your own tune and thinking about all the things you'd do once you're back in Lizzie's arms.

Your mind starts to drift off into more explicit train of thought, imagining how her slender fingers would feel around your throat, how sweet she'd taste on your tongue, how fast she'd make you cum after so much time apart.

You blink rapidly, trying to ignore the growing wetness between your legs and regain your focus back to your eggs. You finish them in record speed, popping hints of toast into your mouth with each bite.

Once you finish, you wash your dishes. You then leave the kitchen and grab your keys, making your way outside and down the stairs of your complex. You get inside your car, start it and back out of the parking lot.

You drive yourself over to the nearest flower shop, parking your car in front of it and stepping out.

Heading inside the store, your nostrils are instantly flooded with the smell of all the surrounding plants.

You go straight for the roses, Lizzie's favorite, also making sure to grab some gardenias, mixing them in with the bouquet to help it pop.

You ask the florist to have a custom tag written on the side of the bouquet, a smile on your face as you wait patiently for him to make it and ring you up. 

Once you pay, you drive over to your local grocery store, grabbing a shopping cart and pushing it to the candy section. You grab a large chocolate bunny, and the cliche heart shaped box and put it inside.

You notice a wooden basket in the aisle across from you, grabbing it, you continue shopping till you're left with a stuffed teddy bear, a card, a fluffy blanket with little dogs on it and the chocolates from before.

You check out and drive back home, starting to set up your gift basket. You put the everything inside and start writing in the card you bought.

I'm so proud of you for being the big beautiful star I knew you'd always shine to be. I love you Lizzie.

You sign it, drawing a little heart next to your name, putting it in with everything else.

You grab your flowers, "Welcome home" written on the ribbon wrapping it, and place them next to basket on the table for the moment.

Your next task is getting yourself ready. You rush into your bathroom, stripping yourself of your clothes and going to take a shower.

As you make quick work to shave and keep yourself clean for her, the thoughts from earlier start coming back, a blush tainting your cheeks as you feel your core tingle.

Still, you regain your composure, finishing your shower and drying yourself off. You take a quick glance at your phone, knowing the flight from New York to L.A is only a few hours, and you'd already spent a good chunk of them shopping.

You find yourself a pair of white underwear with a tiny pink bow on it and decide to not to wear a bra, knowing that if anything were to happen, she wouldn't want to waste time on the pesky garment.

You throw on her burgundy NYU sweatshirt, and grey sweatpants, smiling when you realize her shirt still smells like her.

Sitting at your vanity you start to do your makeup, nothing too much, just a natural look.

You couldn't look a mess for the love of your life now could you?

Just as you finish up, you get a text from Lizzie telling you she'd landed and was in an Uber on the way home.

Your heart flutters, that rush of excitement returning to you as you feel butterflies in your stomach.

You sit on the couch, facing the door, the flowers in your hand as you wait for her like an obedient puppy, clutching your phone as you fight the urge to call her and ask how much longer she'd take.

As if right on cue, you hear the front door handle jiggle, Lizzie stepping inside with her luggage, your first instinct is to run up and practically pounce onto her.

"Baby!" You squeal.

She gasps, letting go of her bag and catching you as you wrap your arms around her, the flowers almost falling out of your grasp. She presses a kiss to your cheek, making you blush before you turn to kiss her.

"Well hello to you too." She grins, pecking your lips a few times, closing the door behind you two with her foot and setting you down, noticing the gifts you'd gotten her.

You hand her the bouquet and her smile widens. "Is this for me?" You nod, suddenly feeling shy as you notice the adoration in her eyes. "Got you presents."

Lizzie sniffs the flowers and her smile widens, she steps further inside your shared apartment, she makes her way up to the coffee table, her mouth opening slightly as she notices all the things you put together for her.

"You're so good to me." She turns to you, tears welling up in her eyes as she pulls you into a hug, kissing the crown of your head.

"You work so hard Liz, you deserve it." Gently, she backs away, turning to examine your gift basket.

The first thing she picks up is your card, opening it and a pout forming on her face. You look down at your feet bashfully, waiting for her to see the rest of her treats.

Slowly, she takes each out one by one, the chocolates, the bear and the blanket. She bites her lip in thought. You look up, "I would've gotten more but.. I didn't know if I had enough time."

She shakes her head, turning to you with her arms wide. She pulls you into her and picks you up again, your legs wrapping around your torso as your arms wrap around her neck, foreheads pressed against one another.

"This is more than enough babygirl, you make me feel so special. I only wish I'd gotten you something."

You shake your head, "You being here is a gift in itself, I'm so happy you're home." You kiss her again, leaving little pecks all over her face, making her giggle.

Lizzie walks the two of you over to your shared bedroom, laying down in bed together with your arms still securely around each other, you straddling her lap.

You start to press kisses onto her neck, sucking at the skin at the column of her throat, little marks forming in their wake.

Lizzie groans, pushing your head closer as she feels your hands slip under her shirt, your cold hands on her hot skin making her shiver.

"I missed you so much." You murmur against her, "Wanted to feel you everyday."

Lizzie backs away for a second to unbutton her blouse, revealing a gray laced bra. You moan at the sight, looking up at her for approval before you reached behind her to unclip it, discarding the fabrics.

You leave your marks on the tops of her breasts, moving downwards and circling your tongue around her areola, Lizzie throbbing at the feeling.

Just as you switch to the other breast, you're flipped onto your back, pinned underneath her as she kisses you, tongue swiping your lip, asking for entrance.

You grant it to her, whimpering into her mouth as she takes over. Your hands go to her hair, tugging the silky brown locks as you wrap your legs around her to keep her close.

She breaks the kiss, slipping off her pants and panties, leaving her bare in front of you. She shifts down between your legs, spreading them and rubbing up and down your thighs.

"So pretty like this, in my shirt all precious, my gorgeous girl." You blush at her praise.

"Lizzie please-"

"That's not my name is it now?" She mockingly pouts at you, tilting her head

"I'm sorry.. mommy."

"Much better." You're practically plead for her to give you anything, begging her and trying to reason that it's been too long without her, you'd missed her touch, her hands on you.

You needed her.

Lizzie finally gives in, bunching the sweater up and pushing it past your breasts, revealing them to her. You try to pull it off but she grabs your hand.

"Don't. Keep it on." You obey and lay back onto the pillows.

She takes a nipple into her mouth, the other getting twisted by her slim fingers. Your body quivers, little moans escaping you at the feeling of her toying with your chest.

Still, you craved more. "Mommy touch me... please I need it so bad."

She chuckles "Am I not touching you right now darling?" She pinches your nipple, making you squeeze your eyes shut.

"Yes.. j- just need you down there." You tilt your head downward trying to gesture what you wanted.

"Down where princess? C'mon you can tell mommy, use your words." Your face flushes red in embarrassment, taking her hand and bringing it between your legs.

"Need mommy to play with my.. my big girl parts." She lets out a faux gasp, almost taunting you, tugging at the hem of your sweatpants and pulling them down.

She notices your underwear and bites her lip, fiddling with the little bow. "Such a pretty princess." You whine, bucking your hips up towards her as your wetness made the fabric almost transparent.

Lizzie rubs your slit through your panties, teasing you with two fingers and watching as you writhe underneath her, a dark smile drawing itself onto her face at your whimpers.

"P-please don't tease, I need you."

She pushes your panties to the side admiring your glistening cunt. Finally she makes contact with you, making you throw your head back, moaning at the feeling of her fingers on you.

"F-fuck." You groan when she dips two fingers into your entrance, not even giving you a moment to adjust as she pumps them into you.

"God I love this tight little pussy, no matter how many times I fuck it, it still grips mommy so good." You whimper, your hand reaching down to grab onto her forearm as she keeps a steady pace.

"Unh- mommy.. please don't stop." She smirks before bringing her head down, taking your clit into her mouth. "Oh my god."

Her tongue swirls around your bundle of nerves, your hand moving to grip onto her hair as she takes you. Your hips grind against her tongue while your legs tremble, the feeling of your climax approaching quickly.

"Fuck m’gonna cum, gonna cum on mommy's pretty face." Lizzie takes this moment to nibble on your throbbing pearl, your eyes rolling in the back of your head as you let out a guttural moan.

You feel the waves of your orgasm rush through you, your walls clenching around Lizzie's fingers as you slowing come down from your high.

You feel her press her lips to your pussy before trailing back upwards. Leaving quick kisses up your stomach and chest.

She pulls her fingers out of you, bringing them to your lips and watching as you suck the digits clean. Moaning at the taste of yourself.

Her free hand reaches down to wrap itself around your throat, gently squeezing the sides of your neck. Her tongue melds with yours when she kisses you.

Lizzie positions her wet heat onto yours, grinding against yours, making your nails dig into her forearm as you convulse in pleasure.

"M-mommy.. s-still sensitive..." She shushes you, licking a stripe from the column of your neck to your earlobe before taking it into your teeth.

"Take what I give you princess, good girls let their mommies handle them as they please."

You whine, your folds fluttering as you feel yourself getting closer. Lizzie's sloppy wetness brushing against yours in the best way, making you see stars.

"Mmph- ah.. fuck mommy!" You cum, your body trembling. She follows soon after, both of your breathing heavy and ragged as you come back down to earth.

"I love watching you fall apart." She cups your cheek making your heart flutter at her endearment.

"Mommy?" She looks down at you adoringly, raising her brow. "What is it baby?"

"Can I.. Can I taste you?" Her smile returns, nodding her head. She positions herself above you, your mouth watering when you notice the build up of her arousal between her lower lips.

You grab onto her thighs, pulling her down as Lizzie grabs onto the headboard. You start to lap at her cunt, her eyes rolling into her head as she praises you.

One of her hands reaches down and tugs on your hair, pulling you closer to her as feel yourself get drunk off her juices.

"Oh there you go angel, so fucking good." That last bit comes off in a growl, her body rocking against your face as she feels her climax wash through her, a blissed out grin on her face.

Lizzie drops back into bed, kissing your puffy lips, the both of you moaning into eachother's mouths.

She finally takes this time to take off the sweater, pulling your now naked body into her arms and cuddling you.

She traces invisible lines onto your back and the two of you sigh happily at the skin to skin contact. She presses a kiss to your forehead as you slowly start to feel yourself drift off into sleep.

Your eyes start to shut as you lose yourself in the safety of her arms. "I love you." Is the last thing you hear her whisper before you fall in a deep sleep.

[dairyfreenugget]

(Alt texts under the cut)

Little baby

Little baby baby man

Alt texts in order

ID start: A doodle of a newborn, non-void Pure Vessel from Hollow Knight. They're held in four hands by their father, The Pale King. They're smaller than his palms, tiny and round with closed eyes and round, nobby horns, and a short fluffy mane around their neck and down their back. They're squirming in his grasp and holding one of his thumbs with their muzzle pressed against it. End ID.

ID start: A doodle page of a newborn, non-void Pure Vessel from Hollow Knight. In the first doodle, they're held up in one hand by The Pale King, squirming and grasping at his fingers as their squeak, their mouth wide open and tiny teeth and mandibles visible. In the second doodle, they're laying on their tummy and quinting their eyes, looking quite grumpy, a text next to them says "Just opened their eyes and unhappy about the light". In the third doodle, they're being feed meet by their father, they're tiny enough that he has to use only one of his fingers to help them get the tiny meat chunks as they bite on his finger and hold his knuckles for support. End ID.

ID start: Two doodles of The Pale King from Hollow Knight as a child. In one he's a newborn baby, tiny and stubby with a little nubby crown, and a short fluffy mane aroubd his neck that runs down to his centipede fail, his eyes still closed, he's laying on his tummy. In the other doodle he's bigger, toddler aged, with a bit shaper features than the newborn but still rounder, his crown is short and still rounded, and his mane is fluffier and longer, and he has big round eyes; he's sitting hunched over with the second set of his arms lifted up and he's looking up and to the right, his sharp brow gives him a sort of pernament grumpy face. End ID.

[desertforestfic]

big thanks to garfunkel @garagepaperback for the end of year tag. here's some shit that happened to me in 2024, cause i'm not sure i can unwind this year in fandom from my real 3d life:

spent the first two months or so taking fumbling baby steps into real ass adulthood

reread all the harry potter books, perhaps for the final time

started my first big girl job

fell face first into h/d fandom

saw a total solar eclipse

got my dang nose pierced

moved out of my college apartment

adopted a kitten

ended a long term relationship

came out to myself and family/friends as a lesbian

went to some concerts

drank some coffee

took some walks

cooked and ate good food

listened to music

spent time with my friends

turned twenty-four

read fifteen books and several million words of fanfiction

started writing: 30k words of fic under my belt thus far. i cannot begin to express what having a creative and community outlet during all of the above has meant. i don't know what i would have done without drarry this year, truly.

i'm not sure i've ever experienced so much upheaval or joy or grief or confusion or relief or pain or excitement in a single 12 month period. it's never too late or too early to be honest with yourself; to do something brave; to try new things and be imperfect at them. grateful for it all, grateful to feel my feelings so wholly, grateful to have people in my corner both online and off. you know who you are. i love you! consider yourself tagged! tell me what you wrote and made and read and felt and did and loved!!!

my picks:

music // chappell roan (saved my stupid chungus babygay life this year), magdalena bay, vampire weekend, backseat lovers, big thief, hozier always, my chemical romance forever, sufjan stevens double forever

movies // my holy trinity: conclave, challengers, i saw the tv glow

books // standouts: in memoriam (alice winn), detransition, baby (torrey peters), idlewild (james frankie thomas), and giovanni's room (james baldwin). also enjoyed: babel (rf kuang), all the light we cannot see (anthony doerr), and the year of magical thinking (joan didion).

fic // so much. SO MUCH!!! I did my absolute best to keep track via spreadsheet. here’s a tiny assortment of things that left big marks on my heart:

Far From The Tree (aideomai) // who will receive you in love’s offices @jtimu // Red Wine Supernova @mono-chromia // The most he's ever said @fastbrother // When You Unfold Me @hephaestiions // Among the Elements @sweet-s0rr0w // O Come, All Ye Faithful @toomuchplor // Fearful Trill @vukovich // javelin (to have and to hold) @garagepaperback // clerestory @yiiiiiiiikes25

ok!! that is all!! thanks for reading this big old chunk of text :,) can’t wait for more of everything above in 2025 :,)

[thesealantern]

Pink corruption headcannons! (Varying from nonsensical, angsty to silly, most of these are weirdly specific but stick with me okay?)

• Pentellow was completely illiterate for a good chunk of her life, Iris has taught her the basics of reading and writing and while she can read simple texts fairly easily she still struggles with writing. Every time she needs to write anything she has Iris do it for her, she walks around the room like an old military general while she’s dictating. (It helps her think)

• Occasionally, when Iris is particularly upset, frustrated or stressed, he’ll blurt out something his dad told him as a kid. No one ever takes it to heart and half the time it isn’t even something particularly offensive but every time it happens Iris feels terrible and I’m telling you this man sits on his bed staring at his hands like “I am no better than my father”, he can time all instances this has happened and yes they haunt him when he’s falling asleep.

• Anytime Pyrare tries to write a letter to the other caretakers it ends in catastrophe. He refuses to shrink for the task, so either he tried to just write in very small letters and the text is absolutely unreadable, he asks Gold to write it who then proceeds to shorten it and leave stuff out (and has occasionally just changed the contents of letters entirely, mostly when it’s someone he doesn’t like) or there was that one time he just sent Pentellow and Iris a monster sized letter. It was a pain to deal with, they still have it somewhere because Pentellow insisted they keep it.

• Iris has a weird hatred towards a very specific kind of cursive most of the people back at the palace (including his father) used. Anytime he sees it anywhere he just gets super irritated, it’s honestly kind of amusing. Is Iris aware that a grudge against a style of writing is stupid? Yeah, but he doesn’t care.

• Gold and Cyanide like to play chess together sometimes, they’re both fairly good at it and their games are super intense and take a long while. The other heroes all collectively suck at chess (Orange is mediocre, Tsavorite and Cyan are a lost cause) but join in if it’s at Pyrare’s place, though that usually leads to them using the ridiculously sized chess board to make up their own games.

• The first time Gold saw a non-monster shape he was absolutely flabbergasted, he did know of them, but for most of his life he hadn’t seen one (I imagine Pyrare and Gold lived a fairly isolated life for the most part) and Pyrare never made it sound like a big deal so he just kinda thought they’d be a bit shorter. The fact they had two eyes was also kind of weird, sure he has two eyes but he just thought that was a hero thing.

• Seeing the inside of a shape-sized house was even more baffling, Gold still hasn’t gotten over how tiny some things are.

•Every time they spend a long time in shape populated area Pyrare is just STARVING, there’s no way any of the inns they stayed at have portions close to what an adult monster needs. He never complains about it though. Honestly I think he would just pass out at one point, the lack of food mixed with so much travelling is bound to catch up to him.

• Kind of random but monsters probably have a much slower heartbeat than shapes. Since most large animals have larger hearts but they pump at a slower pace, I’m pretty sure it has to do with temperature regulation but idk man I’m no biologist.

[elane-in-the-shadows]

Red Queen Fan Fiction - The Flowers of Piedmont Part I

May 13th - Happy Birthday, Diana Farley

A/N: An in-depth new series dedicated to the month around Clara's birth in Piedmont where SHADE IS STILL ALIVE. I don't care about canon anymore, I've imagined this en detail for nine years, let's indulge in the fluff. Fade supremacy.

Companion work to Hidden Intentions and follow-up to A Promise Under Flowers. Connections mentioned in text; can be read independently.

I post this here in one big chunk but splitted it on Wattpad and AO3 - read where and how fast you prefer. The first part features backward storytelling; the second part will move forward in time again.

8660 words

Find this on Wattpad

Find this on AO3

Part I

The return on May 30th

Shade Barrow had played the spy enough times in his life to become skilled at eavesdropping. So he knew how to stand beside the door of the meeting room casually but close enough to listen in, waiting for the familiar sounds of a gathering concluding. Despite perfecting the timing, he forewent knocking and opened the door, walking in as if pulled by a magnet.

He found the magnet without having to search. Diana rose to welcome him, equally drawn. She moved toward him in step so fluid, he didn’t even think to take in the rest of the room. He was transfixed. No less so when she reached him and grasped his shoulders, offering one playful smile before they lips met.

She kissed him with newfound, unbridled passion – no more delight in secrecy, no public restraint, no awkwardness over commenting the obviousness of their relationship. Over the threshold of the meeting room, Diana took Shade by the chin and kissed him in front of everyone. Put your man in line, she’d confessed jokingly what was whispered about them after Shade had caused a scene with the colonel. This was her reply. A show as intense as the smell of blood-red roses.

He even caught a whiff of fragrance tethered on the buds of her lips. Thoughts strayed to when he last saw her with blood on her face, and his arms tensed. Her fingers traced his jaw, wandering to the back of his neck to tangle in his hair. Her other hand went lower, to his waist, and with his eyes closed, her touch anchored him, lost in the kiss and the image of roses –

But no, he couldn’t get lost, give in as if there was no one else, or he didn’t care. He held in his arms the reason why Diana let go, and how everything had changed. Clara.

Her presence was another kind of anchor. Even now, he knew she was awake when he’d smiled down at her as he’d settled beside the door. Even now, he shivered as her hand grasped the sleeve of his shirt. He still failed to comprehend the might of so tiny a hand.

It didn’t change the way he and Diana were kissing, nor the longing between them. Or – not more since their lives had already shifted dimensions two weeks ago when she was born.

Clara made everything more intense.

Diana leaned away. Her expression controlled to a faint smile. Now she kept her bewitching hands off him.

He blinked as he finally assessed their surroundings. The embarrassed stares and evading eyes of the group. Davidson and his second looking at their papers, Ada too but smiling to herself, the Scarlet Guard generals and aides trying to keep still while the colonel he didn’t grant attention. Shade found Cal, looking back and forth, and Mare, next to him, with her eyes on them and both astonished and grinning. She grabbed Cal’s hand as if to tone down his reaction although she was the one barely hiding her amusement. Shade gladly played lovey-dovey if it lit her up like that.

“Do you have a request, Shade?” Cal asked, saving him with a transition skill Shade thanked his royal training for. Shade had just come to accompany Diana from her first meeting after her baby break, suspecting she wanted to see Clara again as soon as possible, yet he had to grip the offered branch as he had no idea what they were discussing. He fished for anything as he took in the members of the group, desperate to avoid making a fool of himself as he recovered the current issues of the Scarlet Guard. A baby and victory mood had left him lax on attention. “Good afternoon, yes, indeed. Have you fortified the undefensed vehicle garages yet?” he managed at last. Some weeks ago, he’d noticed and reported this issue himself. On their arrival, Diana had been in charge of inspecting the piedmont base to meet their necessities yet she wasn’t fit to walk the complete parameters in the heat. He’d done it instead as her left-hand-man, used to similar tasks for silver officers in the nortan army. But then Diana was promoted to general and gave birth and now the colonel had the job and Shade loved to annoy him.

The attendees mumbled and cleared throats while Diana swallowed a breath. “We’ve been working on it,” she said, “good that you remind us of the need.” She took his arm and threw him a sharp look. She still didn’t appreciate his antics against her father. She returned her attention to the group. “I expect this to be remedied in two days,” she ordered, “the funds and supplies are ready.” With a nod, she bid them goodbye and closed the meeting, exiting the room and pulling Shade along.

With everyone going their ways, the three of them were left alone in the corridor. Time to breathe again. She hugged him from the side, her head resting on his shoulder. Shade cleared his throat. “Are you tired?”

She shrugged yet didn’t even sigh. Only looked at Clara and caressed her face until the baby captured a finger.

He laughed. “She has the fastest hands ever,” he said and Diana fell in. After a few seconds of leaning on him, she took Clara from him, holding her close, cheek to cheek. “My love,” she whispered.

Diana had loved her for months, already the mere idea of her. She was quicker to grasp the meaning of becoming a parent and yet – another thorough change had gone through her still, this passion she no longer tried to hide from others. He’d understood the appeal she found in secrecy but this new facet of her – it unmoored him, and it never failed to amaze him how many sides he discovered in her.

She turned to him and even then, he missed the weight of holding Clara. It had been like this since the first time she was in his arms, and he neither dared nor wanted to put her aside. He argued Diana had had her for months.

He swallowed. It was hard to move his mind out of childcare mode, yet it wasn’t like Clara’s needs would go away while they did other things. This was what this day was about – learn to balance childcare with the Guard, their specific jobs, their relationship, their lives. It seemed like it came easier to Diana to leave Clara in his or his parents’ care. She’d informed the officers and co-councillors she’d bring her daughter along to meetings but she was still so little and as Shade was eager to keep Clara close to him, they’d decided she’d return alone with her full attention.

“You know,” Diana said as they slowly paced, “we did talk about exactly the thing you brought up.”

He sucked in a breath – that explained her reaction. Did that leave his prompt awkward or on point? He hadn’t thought about the urgency of the request when he’d made it, and Diana knew this.

Their stances on the colonel differed, more so lately. Diana was less confrontational and he all the more, suspecting the colonel levelled undue demands at her. Diana was aware of her duties which only increased with her promotion but he thought the colonel’s remarks went beyond that.

Shade realized he turned passive-aggressive-protective when it came to the colonel. Shade couldn’t accept his continued lack of improvement; it was like he was the force urging Diana to work despite the demands of her body and baby to rest. He knew her weak spots and didn’t attempt to avoid them. Diana insisted she couldn’t judge her father too harshly – she knew why he was like this and had gone along with it, for years. When she explained, Shade almost felt bad for causing trouble. Support meant meeting her preferences to spare the colonel. But during those very same moments she told him about this, he witnessed how she’d suffered from his cold, distanced attitude. Shade couldn’t forgive the colonel still wouldn’t amend, not even when Diana had just had a baby. She’d hated living like that! Like functional professionals, comrades with no ties of family. Diana had pretty much admitted to Shade she wanted Clara because the colonel was no family for her.

Shade stopped to stroke her back. “The colonel treated you alright, didn’t he?” He refrained from asking if the colonel had been reprimanded for the unsupervised garages during the meeting.

She freed a hand to cuff his chest. “You’ve caught him alright.” She smirked. “But we mostly talked with Mare about court facilities and conflicts now the Samos have defected while Cal charmed everyone. His mood has lifted decidedly lately.”

“I see why.” His eyes found hers as he twirled a curl of her hair but even as he flirted, he thought of Mare and Cal’s clasped hands. Two more who couldn’t stop touching. Diana gave him an inquiring look but didn’t say anything else. Was it desire or wondering? He pressed his palm against her shoulders. “And are you alright?”

She nodded gravely, yet her face softened, if not fell. Her lips were so rose-red he considered it was lipstick as he traced such remnants left on his own. Her hair was washed and combed to loose curls, also carrying the distinct, sweet scent of roses. Plus her crisp white tunic over her red trousers – she had, most unusually, dressed up to the occasion.

“If this was a pissing contest,” he began, “I thought your tactic is to have them take you as you are?” She never prettied herself up for leisure, only for necessities like disguising on missions. Was this a mission in disguise for her? Maybe her co-councillors needed to be reminded Diana was only up and about already because she had Sara to heal all her infirmities and even that left her so exhausted after the birth that she’d slept for days.

She knew what he meant but shrugged. “Tried something out. You have to surprise them sometimes, get them off their feet.”

With a snort, he spun in front of her, taking her in. “You have flustered me,” he said, and tucked a curl behind her ear.

A cackle escaped her throat and for a moment, she stared at him as if she wanted to kiss him like before, his longing growing until it shifted into missing. Still she looked, and he knew she was playing with him.

She opened her mouth but froze before saying whatever she intended. “She sleeps,” she murmured, pulling Shade’s gaze at Clara’s face half hidden in her shirt.

How come she was cuter every time he looked? She made him feel a pierce in his heart that could kill him. If it wasn’t Clara’s weight alone that bound him, her sight took him over on a new level now that she found into her own features. She resembled him so much, he couldn’t forget she was a part of him with the same colouring in shades of brown, with amber eyes as intricate and sweet as honeycombs.

Angling her head, Diana guided him away, with careful steps. “One meeting is enough for today,” she said with a glint in her smile. Of course she noticed how besotted he was. “I don’t care for work right now. I’d rather”, she went on, but dragged the moment out until he was dying to hear it, “like to go outside again.” That coda would be a cool-down if her eyes didn’t sparkle with excitement.

He glanced through the window into the afternoon sun, playing clueless himself. “But not with Clara.” He was still on the fence on bringing her outside during the day, assuming she was as heat-sensitive as her mother and a generally delicate newborn.

Diana chuckled but her eyes never stopped fixing him. “No,” she said slowly. “She can stay with your parents.” He nodded, still uncertain where this was going, till she added, “so you can finally give me my birthday present.”

He tensed, gasping, and lost his breath entirely when she whispered something so lewd in his ear he’d never dreamed of hearing. “Sure,” he agreed, his voice husky with arousal. “I‘ve promised.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two weeks earlier, May 13th

In the gym, the light was blinding. Farley squinted against the sunshine falling in from the high windows before adjusting, stepping over the patterns of light and shadows thrown on the floor. The activity in the hall revived an itch in herself, to walk outside, feel every muscle of her body in power instead of heavy and tired out by the heat, days spent sitting through meetings and calculations, and nine months of pregnancy.

Well. She let her arms swing, stretching and enjoying to walk. That was a thing she’d started doing in the meetings, too, standing and wandering and making the other attendees get used to it. It was better this way. She was a general now, her duties heavier than ever. She couldn’t disappoint the leadership that had promoted her, nor the soldiers under her command now. She had to impress the monfortan faction and have them support the Guard making further alliances as she kept together the fragile coalition between red, silver and newblood rebels, in Norta and the Lakelands. But endure and stay unassuming until she collapsed, or insist on her needs and have them accept that. After the daunting experience two weeks ago, enough was enough.

Shade would support. So much that she did it on her own, before she complained to him and he reminded her to go through with what she preferred. She’d begun to feel embarrassed to need him to tell her to trust herself, yet it was encouraging to know he had her back.

Now she found his back in the hall, bent over himself to stretch, just wrapping up his training. For a moment, she could only watch, the brown skin and outlines of his body embraced and gilded by the sun, his sinews and muscles emphasized in lithe elegance as his grown, longish hair fell over his face. She wanted to brush through it. Sometimes, he called her a study in pastel sunrise, but he was the warmth of sunlight and fire, entwined with the shadows they cast. The light in the dark. The strength hidden in shadows. When he looked up and faced her, she bit her lip, caught staring and distracted by his beauty.

He smiled as she reached him. “You done?” she asked.

His fingertips brushed her bare arms, causing the hairs on her skin to rise as if it was still the first time touching. “I’ve just been passing the hours, waiting till your schedule’s over,” he said. As they moved to the edge of the hall, his smile fell. “You had no issue with working the whole of today?”

They passed a wall bar and on a whim, she stopped, leaning against it. She reached up, holding Shade’s gaze. “It was okay, the usual.” She breathed out as her arms stretched above her. Just the memory of sports excited her.

Shade positioned himself in front of her, hands grabbing the bar behind her waist and meeting her eyes. “You’re really alright,” he said, pondering.

In lieu of shrugging, the corners of her mouth twitched. It wasn’t like she felt no strain at all. “It’s neat.”

“Okay then. I wish you,” he grinned, “a happy due date.”

Now she winced for real. “Must you with this again? I didn’t have the slightest cramps today.”

His grin was lingering. He leaned ever closer so their bellies touched, his hand shifting to her waist. Although her body’s shape had changed so much, his touch there was no less enticing and the glint in his amber eyes told her it was the same for him. He inched forward, angling his head to kiss her jawline. “No?” She sensed a nervousness in his whisper, similar to her own. “I must’ve mixed this up.” He looked up. “Happy birthday, I mean.”

For a moment, she just wanted to drink in the love in his gaze. Then she shifted to nuzzle his cheek, maintaining her grasp of the bar, enjoying the kinky restraint of it. “Thank you,” she murmured, as she breathed in. His other hand joined the embrace of her waist and she thought this was it. She had worked despite the imminent birth of their child, expected by today, but being with Shade, right here right now, erased the stress and exhaustion.

As they broke apart, she gasped. He considered her. “If you want to work out,” he said, “a coach might have recommendations.”

She shook her head. “Never mind. We can go swimming again tomorrow.” She relaxed and let go of the bar but Shade still held her so tightly as if to pretend he was lifting her down. They stayed close, brows meeting. Her now free hands couldn’t decide where to touch him first. Only the idea of letting go and part was unimaginable. She reached for his hair and almost anticipated someone in the gym making a lewd comment.

“I’ve promised you a present,” Shade said, and the memory of it fired up, despite all that had happened in between. She hesitated.

His lips grazed her ear. “I want to show you something.” And before someone could interrupt their romantic mood, she followed him out with delight.

He had left her outside in anticipation of kisses and “promises” to wash. Quickly, she hoped. Foolishly, she’d exited the gym and stood outside, rolling on her heels and massaging her back. Despite the shade of the entry and its awning, the heat of the late afternoon made her sweat again. This time of the day the warmth of Piedmont accumulated the most. She had found it hard to tolerate it the first time she was this far south years ago, and she found it even harder right now, pregnant and, although she disliked to combine the words, sadly swollen. Just the weather, she comforted herself, just the last days.

“Diana.”

Her name whispered from behind made her shiver her like a welcome breeze. Shade’s fingers slid over her shoulder, along her arms, before joining their hands. “Sorry you had to wait,” he added.

She glanced at him, cleaned and his hair messy but glittering with water drops. His face was concerned, even as he led the way.

He knows I hate the heat. Touching but it was her fault for going outside. She shook her head. “No matter,” she replied. She leaned over and kissed his cheek, watching him swallow afterward. That was what he got for teasing – he wanted to give in, too.

The base wasn’t completely awful – the landscape was in full bloom, all green trees with flowers along the way, fresh and sweet scents accompanying their walk. Farley was stunned such a peaceful place existed, even considering it was a military base. Its silvers creators combined function with beauty – or rather, luxury. It felt unreal, like a dream or refuge and it woke memories in her, letting her imagine a different time. Or world.

The beauty seduced one like a trap, only she had been on guard the moment she’d set foot here, and the heat was a further warning to keep her mind clear.

And she needed to, as Shade wove them along the side paths and quieter, less used buildings of the complex. To set and keep the base running, she’d poured over lists and maps and found the spots they walked now on paper before she had sent people to inspect, guard or man them, if their purposes were required. One day, she’d tried to walk over the base herself until she admitted it beyond her strength. Shade had been doing it for her and now he showed the fruits of this tour. He navigated them easily and experienced around corners she wouldn’t have guessed led anywhere and despite the maze-like trip, it was one of shortcuts, as it only lasted a few minutes before he stopped.

He turned to her, grasping her shoulder. “You alright?”

She patted his chest. “I’ll survive.”

He smiled in response, guiding her into the small building in front of them, which was, indeed, a porch on the backside of a house, overgrown with wisteria and lilac bushes around it.

Stepping inside, it had remained surprisingly cool and was rather dim, the jalousies half down and the windows covered with pollen. The seats inside were invitingly cozy, a few chairs with a couch and a bench surrounding a low table.

Shade presented it all with a flourish, letting her choose a favourite seat. She sank into the couch, resting her arm on the edge of it. “Could you have foreseen this thing?” she said. “This place is exactly …” Her hand lay on the cusp of her belly, and her head fell back. Above, thick and dark wooden beams intertwined with tangles of the wisteria tree growing beside the walls, almost like a pillar. The scent of the bloom enveloped her while Shade opened a cabinet. He produced an array of food on a painted plate. Numerous snacks up for the taking, like bread, dips, slices and several sweet desserts.

Already, Farley lunged for a waffle as soon as he set it down.

“Wolfish hunger.” He cackled, then sat, sideways and only on the edge of the couch. “I’m glad to match your tastes.”

“Thank you,” she mumbled after she’d swallowed.

“Though, I could organize a grill for warm food if that provided you more satisfaction.”

She froze in her tracks of eating another cake. “You brought it all here before?”

He shrugged. “Well, you prefer to walk but I have quicker ways.” He winked. “I’ve had the whole day you were working to prepare.” He bent over to align a dish anew and Farley’s head spun.

She caught his hand and fixed his eyes. “Really, thank you” she repeated.

“It’s simply dinner.”

“But you knew I’d want it this way.” Her eyes burned with feelings. She wouldn’t cry over it. Skies, her emotions these days. He only returned the favour of celebrating their birthdays but she’d given him a surprise party in February. She had hardly been sure he’d like it until he did, glad to make his guests happy with a party.

Today, he acted with the certainty she wanted it quiet and intimate.

The same certainty he watched her with right now. She was still captivated as he sank before her, kneeling and resting his hands and chin on her knees.

His eyes were on fire.

“I’ve promised,” he said.

“I’m eating,” she replied. Still overwhelmed.

For a moment, he was aghast, his jaw dropping. Then laughter rose deep from his chest and lasted as he buried his face on her legs. Farley reached out, grasping his hair, again, giving in to another craving. As she brushed through it, she considered to add eat me, despite her comment. But like the time he’d made the promise to explore and taste every inch of her under the shadows of flowers, it was more image and idea, more fantasy than real.

Her knees parted just slightly, accommodating him. She lifted the back of his head, searching his gaze. “No kidding,” she said softly, “but no.” She still played with his hair, savouring every touch. “I’m not up for it. I feel, like, primed for childbirth.”

He took that in, even as she grimaced. Taking his hand, she invited him to rise again and he did, cuddling into her side on the couch.

“This is enough,” she whispered, then gave him a side glance. “For now.”

He smirked. “You’ll hold me to it?”

“I’ve waited so long.” She sighed dramatically. “But you can give me another present. What about the boy name you wanted to come up with?” They had decided on Farley-Barrow as the family name and as she wished to call a girl for her mother or sister, she left the choice of a boy name up to him. He’d agreed but offered no clues.

He looked ridiculously scandalized. “Out of patience? I’ll tell you when we meet them.” He paused. “If they’re not a girl.”

She tsked. “So you wouldn’t tell … ever?” She hesitated to point out the other option – another child after this one.

Neither did he, only smirking more mysteriously until it turned into giggles. The sound was as delightful as the butterfly kisses he placed on her shoulder and arm. His fingertips danced over the curve of her belly and although she eyed another snack, she was caught in fascination over the elegance of his long and nimble fingers.

Even as he kept it up, his face shed playfulness. He glanced up. “Are you afraid?”

She blinked, stunned to standstill. “Way to kill the mood,” she said. “I thought you meant to celebrate my birthday.” She turned her head away and reached for the pistachio-chocolate cookie. Anything but to look at him.

“I meant –”

“You could’ve waited until tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow you might be in labour.”

“Maybe it’s not a good question to ask to begin with.” She chewed.

“Diana!”

She swallowed her snack and let the delicious taste linger in her mouth. It harmonized with the fragrance of the bloom.

He sighed, his brow sinking against her temple. “You’re afraid for them,” he said. His hand splayed on her belly.

She had been afraid for their baby every day. She let work distract her, believing in the cause that would protect the future of their child. Still, now everything could trigger a bout of panic that only feeling it move could unwind. Sometimes, she dropped so deep she needed Shade’s comfort to assure her, his embrace holding her up when she doubted she’d have a child to hold.

I can’t be so lucky to have a living child.

It might make it to full term but be stillborn after all.

To invest all this love and effort might be the riskiest plan I’ve ever made.

When half your family had been taken from you and the rest chose to ignore you, it seemed presumptuous to start your own.

When she wrestled death every day, her own survival through all this time felt like cursed luck as her friends and comrades kept dying.

“We’ve talked through that already, didn’t we?” she said quietly. “That I’m emotionally preparing for the worst.” She added her hand to his, fingertips touching. With perfect timing, the baby shifted.

“It’s lively,” she said, the eternal relief making her smile at Shade. He had to feel it, too. It always surprised him, usually mixed with amusement, yet this time, he appeared rather amazed. Stunned, like swept off his feet.

It happened sometimes, that he showed it – how overwhelmed he was, uncertain what to make of becoming a father. He’d told her, once, and regretted it afterwards. Not wanting to cause her a bad conscience as she had been the one to choose, convinced, and he followed along. He did his best, caring for her, supporting her every day, and she understood. He did for her.

Shade cleared his throat. “But what about you?” he asked, returning to his initial question.

Her head feel back. “Ah, me.” She smiled weakly and enmeshed his hand with her fingers. “I’ll live,” she said, turning to him. At his frown, she went on. “I have Sara to take care of me. We can rely on her.”

Shade inclined his head, accepting this, but still waiting. She sighed. “She is a relief,” she insisted. “She can’t do nothing if our baby isn’t … but I trust she can keep me safe.”

Shade opened his mouth. “Don’t worry,” she said. His lips shut in a tight line. He’d keep fearing for her like she did for the baby, for the worst, without believing it. They couldn’t help it.

“But …” she swallowed. “I’m not sure how it’ll be, of course. I like to think I know pain and endurance, yet who knows? Maybe it’ll be so much worse.” He squeezed her hand. “Or how long it’ll take. It could take days.” She grimaced.

“That would be …” He didn’t like that either.

“Yes, but Caroline says …” Caroline was the nurse who worked with Sara and had treated Farley the last months. “That long births don’t have to be a bad thing. That the body takes its rest and slows down. Better to let it work on its own time than interfere.” She shrugged. “Well, if it’s safe for us? Doesn’t sound like fun though.”

Shade leaned up and kissed her temple. “The baby will be fun,” he said.

She chuckled. “I hope so! And a lot of work, too.” She wanted to stroke her belly again yet didn’t want to let go of Shade’s hand either. So she just looked down. “Maybe I enjoy the waiting too much,” she said softly. “For now, it lives in some way.”

“Dee …”

The fear never left her fully. She shook her head, lightly. “Some pregnant people can’t stand these last days. Totally uncomfortable. I don’t know. At least I can move now. Once I’m in labour, or after the birth, I can’t be sure. I could be too weak to do much of anything.” She faced him, drawing in his gaze. His golden eyes held such warmth, love and determination, despite his own insecurities.

He wouldn’t leave her side. He trained and she was a general of his but he wouldn’t go anywhere that brought him further away than one jump. He hadn’t done so since the day they’d freed Mare.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two weeks earlier

Early, on May 1st, they rose in the dark to start an attack. It was the day of the royal wedding, an auspicious date, one celebrated in old worlds and new. But who would celebrate today?

Hitting on the event amused Shade tremendously. Even as he and Farley were getting dressed in their ridiculously sumptuous, formerly silver lodgings that Shade had bargained for them in the piedmont base, he was electrified with excitement.

Farley didn’t share it. She couldn’t relate to the spring in his step, the way one slice of bread was enough for him for breakfast while she could’ve devoured a full table. She was exhausted and weary. The Scarlet Guard had arrived at the base no whole two days ago and as she had wondered aloud how safe the place was, she had been quickly asked to examine it. That alone would’ve been enough work for her but she also had to acquaint herself with their new monfortan newblood soldiers, their leader Davidson, the Guard’s own reinforcements and the battle plans themselves, deciding who fit into which specific task. She couldn’t bail on that. The international alliance of red leaders was a triumph by itself, one she’d played a vital part in brokering. At least she had no role in assigning everyone else to their beds.

So she hadn’t had time to sleep her due since they’d arrived and even when she’d closed her eyes, what she’d learned of Davidson’s secrets and schemes kept her awake. It had flustered him how pregnant she was when they met, although he’d known it before. Seeing that made a difference, as well as her face when he admitted how he blackmailed the piedmont rulers. By their children.

“You disapprove,” Davidson had said.

“We’ll have to make the most of your efforts,” she’d deflected. At his unflinching stare, she added, “it heightens their motivation to retaliate. And who will be their target?” She’d breathed heavily. “I don’t plan to give the enemy more reason to target our children than they already do.” The nortan draft had wrought enough damage. She’d held up a hand to Davidson. “I understood what it does to them.”

“Dee,” Shade called her now as she still sat on the bed, too high, too large, too richly embroidered. Behind her, he massaged her shoulders, a knee on the bed.

With a sigh, she fixed her gun and straightened. “Coming.” He reached for her hand with an encouraging smile, helping her up.

They clasped hands as they walked to meet the teams before take-off. The twilight before dawn stroked Shade’s features, drawing out his eagerness. He possessed a deadly beauty on this morning as he looked ready to kill. And all that time, this smile. How she had wished to bring that smile on his face, since he had told her how he’d tried but refrained from freeing Mare by himself three months ago.

Farley did think it had been too risky to just try at a random chance. She dreaded lose him, then and today. Still she felt guilty she and their baby stopped him from saving his other family. She owed more to him. She owed more to Mare. Doing nothing for six months was a shame for all of them.

So she relished the smile he showed in anticipation, at the prospect of acting. They stopped in a corner in front of the meeting point, turning to each other. His eyes, so warm and hopeful, were bright and golden as the sun – or more so, before sunrise. She looked so long she drowned in his eyes before he kissed her goodbye, cupping her jaw. On hand on her midriff, he attended to their child. But it was still all too casual to be a farewell. They both avoided to make it one, to acknowledge defeat, that he might not return. She couldn’t deny him this yet a part of her didn’t want to let him go, afraid it’d be their last touch.

He broke off, smirking, grasping her hands. “We’ll show them fire,” he said.

“And burning bright,” she added, their private battle motto taunting the Calore fire. Now she smiled, matching his mood, until he let go to join his comrades. Ending their moment. There was more to say, countless things, but Shade was too optimistic and thrilled, and she – she couldn’t, wouldn’t scare him. They’d gone through the alternate plans during the briefings, and she wouldn’t ask him to come back, no matter how much she wished.

Then he stopped, went back in his tracks and returned to her. Hugging her. “My love,” he whispered. “you’ve made a masterplan.”

Now she couldn’t help it, she grinned from the bottom of her heart even though her eyes grew wet. “Obviously,” she replied.

She arrived at the control room once their soldiers were sent off to Archeon. She nodded to fellow officers and assistants staying behind as she dropped in her chair, relieved. Every step of the walk had felt heavier. The exhaustion only increased her dread, the anxiety about the operation, and this place.

Theoretically, they wouldn’t really have to run things from here, as they didn’t have the means to interfere. They gathered just to watch and communicate with the fighters and their sources on location. Farley relied on their information, already going through preparations to set up if all went awry. Not only the mission. Eventually, Maven would counter.

And his new lakelander allies? She was sick when she heard of the wedding and saw the prideful appearances of the royal Cygnets beside Maven. Norta and the Lakelands, finally at peace, after all the killing they’d forced their red populations into? The Scarlet Guard’s plan, her own work, had been about uniting the red populations the silvers in charge were turning into enemies and this alliance tried to make it look pointless. Like Maven knew, foresaw. It was hardly a surprise, he had met Farley himself and could identify her as a lakelander. And what he tortured out of Mare –

Farley couldn’t find a comfortable position in her seat. She glanced around the room, decidedly not pausing on her father. He was looking at her, of course. Her cheek twitched as she suppressed a wince.

The Cygnets would’ve shared with Maven intel on the Guard to fight them. It made their situation so much more precarious. It made this mission so important. Maven believed he had the upper hand and the Guard would punch him with this offensive while the allies from Montfort were the major surprise.

If only Davidson hadn’t provoked Piedmont …

They wouldn’t have attained this base without the provocation though. Still, that did nothing to reassure Farley. She imagined Piedmont taking it back. She thought of the mission failing, no one returning. And even Maven having them roused this same day, countering immediately once he learned of the infiltrated base, Piedmont happy to help him.

While she watched the notifications come in, listening to the officers’ comments and making replies, she tapped her fingers on the table. Her pulse wouldn’t calm. It wasn’t only the hole ripping her heart at the idea of losing Shade. She felt, all around, profoundly unsafe in this place. She couldn’t trust it. She didn’t want to stay, the richness of her rooms only stressing the presumptuousness of the move here. It was a risk she wouldn’t have taken.

The first thing she did here, even before checking what the base offered, was planning how to evacuate, how to notify everyone and to assess –

A tightening in her lower back surged so viciously it took her breath. It returned with a silent curse.

She fisted her hands in reaction, holding herself up with her arms on the table. Don’t bend over. Her gaze flew over the room. They hadn’t noticed, had they? She’d already looked worn when she arrived, after all. Her heart beat even stronger and her breathing grew quicker. She tried to check herself. She felt still tense, but it hadn’t hurt that much. Maybe it was a one time thing. She cleared her mind, brought herself back on track, caught up on anything she missed. Nothing, it had been that short.

But another cramp came, even as she was prepared. She grinded her teeth. She couldn’t go into labour now, not with all the dangers to anticipate.

She waited it out. Waited for her body to settle again and took a swallow from her water. Then she rose. “Excuse me,” she announced, “I don’t feel well.” She endured their shocked, wary stares with a straight face. “I’ll be in my room, should the situation change.”

She ignored their replies, couldn’t stand more of them and see what lay behind them. How they must take this as confirmation she was unreliable, someone to worry about, who, obviously, visibly, had other priorities than the war.

But sometimes you couldn’t choose what was priority, sorry not sorry. Some needs of the body were too strong to be denied, and she wasn’t any less committed for it. She had done everything they wanted, everything to serve and impress outside of fighting. The pain and stress only increased her anger. The way to her rooms was short, even as her gait was stiff and careful, expecting another cramp. Even when it happened, at the door, she could manage with heavy breathing.

Possibly, the lodgings were worth Shade’s bartering. It was central, cozy, and featured a bathroom. He reminded her to worry for herself. Not to push herself too much. But she couldn’t help having to prove herself. She couldn’t give up the work, had to use her position so their child would have a future. A position she could only hold by doing more than less.

“That’s unfair,” Shade said.

“I know!” she agreed. But it wasn’t the whole truth. There was talk of a promotion and she wanted more. So she could ask more for herself – like their rooms, or a rest. So she could make up for when she’d failed. So the newbloods maintained the attention of Command, and the leadership wouldn’t give up on Mare, drop Shade, Cal, Kilorn, Sara, Cameron or the other Barrows who helped her and the cause so much.

She owed too much to turn away.

She leaned on the velvet couch, closing her eyes. Did she imagine the cramps lessened? She breathed in and out, slowly, focused, calming herself. Fixating on the room. Despite the salmon wallpapers with printed patterns in pink and white, it remained cooler than its warm colouring suggested. It was a north-facing place with two large windows looking over the woods with heavy awnings over a balcony featuring escape stairs. She hadn’t set foot on the balcony but Shade had checked. He had mainly picked the apartment for the coolness, to ease her time in the hot and humid weather here. He also insisted they’d need rooming fitting a family that was close to the command center with control and meeting rooms as well as the infirmary. That left only this apartment filled with silver luxury, so ridiculous in its splendour Farley had wanted to object. “We don’t know how long we’ll even stay.”

Shade didn’t bend. “We don’t know when we’ll need the space,” he claimed and went on to order a second desk besides the massive dark wood table before the windows. He asked if its chair met Farley’s needs before adding a more useful table between the couches, a bed for a newborn and wondering if she desired anything else. She disagreed with the four-poster bed hangings and the heavy extra blankets piled on the bed and those he removed in a minute before cataloguing the bookshelf and picking one book with delight.

In a moment of uncertain ease, she got a glass of water and a wet towel and settled on the couch. She still hadn’t made peace with it – the decorative explosion destroyed the comfort in her opinion; the embroideries were scratching. But carefully, she laid down, head on the seat, her butt propped up on a thick, tasselled and equally embroidered pillow. She hoped that helped to relax her womb. At least her appetite was gone, though she wasn’t sure how hunger would later go with actual labour.

I should have known not to give in, she thought, with the wet towel over her eyes. Not to the demands, not to her pride. But nothing would return her control over her body when it came to this. At some point, she would give birth and would offer all her powers to that alone.

Wasn’t that a job big enough?

“Are you okay?” she whispered to her belly, showing aside the towel and found a stucco ceiling above her. She had no idea how this must feel to her child. She remained alert, waiting for an intensifying to call on the infirmary. Sara wasn’t even here, going on the mission despite – or because of – any horrors she’d suffered at the palace. Farley understood that all too well, yet it left her even more unsafe.

If she had to be honest, she expected to manage the birth without Shade holding her hand. She didn’t want to. She craved his attention, relied on his support, sank into the relief he provided as love tokens. He would’ve helped her examined the base yesterday, too, versed in similar tasks he’d done for the nortan army as an aide. But he’d had his own preparations and training to go through before the operation.

Last afternoon, after Shade had returned from training and she’d needed a break from her papers, she’d prompted to defile the bed with him, one more lovemaking they wouldn’t call a goodbye tryst. One memory to cherish and cheer her up.

She didn’t dare to imagine he would fall in battle, but his absence left its mark anyway. What truly scared her was Shade not there to remove her from danger. That was why labour right now appeared so threatening. She’d be immobilized and in pain, and afterwards thoroughly exhausted, maybe injured, and with a crying, helpless newborn to care for. It was the one time she couldn’t protect herself, no matter how many weapons she carried.

She’d avoided teleporting with Shade for months, as the ongoing pregnancy only increased her nausea caused by jumping. But it was also the sole guarantee of safety she had should they come under attack. She’d have to do it. Yet he wasn’t here to help her when she feared Maven’s and Piedmont’s vengeance. She sucked in a breath, feeling a pierce. Waiting. Calm. Distraction.

She reached for Shade’s book on the table (already replaced and fortunately higher than the one before). Trying to read it proved to be in vain rather quickly – it was the sequel, not beginning, of a complicated story and oddly erotic. She really couldn’t afford thoughts of arousal at the moment. Instead, she returned the towel over her eyes, still wet enough to cool. Under its comforting darkness, she decided to ask Shade about his book, and why he was so excited to have found it. If only they had more time to talk about books. But had they not chosen this life …

I should have known not to give in. Maybe they could’ve had other lives, but in those they would’ve never met. And if she wanted more ways to live for their child, she had to do this. If they both got to meet and make it safely through this day.

Thumping. Rumbling. Stepping. She twitched in her dreams, the sounds a part of them before she shifted into waking. Her eyes opened, blinking, unseeing, until she felt a touch on her cheek.

“Dee.” A whisper to rouse her that rose into urging. “Diana!”

Her eyes finally saw. Shade was bent over her, flushed and panting. She groaned weakly, slowly lifting her hand, reaching for his. “Hm?”

He released a breath. Checked the pulse in her wrist. Looked up, then closed his eyes and rested his brow on hers.

Her mind recovered from sleeping, realizing. He was back. Safe. Her heart fluttered, first from waking, then with gladness. The light had changed to a warmer colour, the sun low and on the other side, gilding the contours of Shade’s face as the rays fell on him. Bless the room for its coolness, sparing her the heat of the day. She’d slept into the late afternoon and her body felt … loose. Not tense with cramps nor heavy with exhaustion. Her heartbeat eased. All was well.

The cramps caused a false alert and Shade was here and alive. As his other hand found her other, she squeezed it. “Hey, how did it go …”

But he was still over her, panting. Why was he panting? Was he injured? Didn’t he get healed? Why would he be so out of breath when he could teleport?

Finally, he lifted his head. Examining her face. “They said you weren’t well,” he said with a frown. “Left the control room. Are you okay?”

She shrugged. “I had cramps.”

Immediately, he was alarmed. “Cramps? You didn’t tell me? I’d never have left if you told me!”

She winced at his outburst and his face softened. His thumb caressed her cheek. His panicked worry still flustered her. “It’s over. Nothing happened. It was, like, preparative?”

That didn’t relax him. His frown remained and he kept that stare up, like the hold on her face. As if he needed to hold her for certainty.

“For a moment, I feared …” he began. Shivered. He didn’t continue as he sank lower, turning to crouch before the couch and not letting go of her hand. He grasped it with both of his, and she felt it touching his brow and lips.

Here he sat crumbled in front of her and clasping her hand like a lifeline. As if she might not have been here to find - alive. Was he even shaking?

She tried to pet his head but didn’t have the reach lying down. She was dazzled. He imagining something terrible had happened to her couldn’t have lasted more than five minutes yet it stabbed him to his core. She sighed and her hand fell on her chest. The baby stirred, unconcerned. At least one of them was at peace.

Maybe it was the mission. Mare. Farley didn’t know anything about it and the tension of the battle must linger in him. He acted like pregnancy was an illness that could suddenly kill them both. She was inclined to dismiss that though – you never knew. Nobody had checked on her all day, not even to inform her about the accomplished mission as she’d requested. It both angered and chilled her. It was as she suspected and feared – she had to function or she didn’t matter.

In the end, she preferred Shade’s fussing.

This wouldn’t do, and her appetite was returning. She wriggled the pillow away and then slid, ungracefully, off the couch to squat beside him. That startled him.

“Dee? Don’t –”

She put a finger on his mouth. “I’m okay because you came back to me.” Although in this position, she noticed something had changed. Thanks to the cramps, the weight of her womb sat lower. “If I feel bad, you can jump me right to the infirmary.” She should go there, period. She’d longed to be alone and lie down but what if the cramps had affected the baby? She’d never forgive herself to have waited. It was like the very real pain had chased away her paranoia.

Shade’s eyes widened at the unlikely offer of teleporting her. He rested his forehead on hers and she hugged his back, grasping his shoulders as if to claim him as hers. Her hands moved along with his heavy breathing. She needed to feel his presence as much as he needed hers.

“I think,” she began, “we can walk to the infirmary to be sure.”

Shade sighed loudly. “Can you?”

“We can try.”

He nodded slowly, then turned to her belly. “Don’t worry us like that,” he said to the baby.

“It’s not its fault,” she disagreed. “My body does that work.”

He gasped, caught off guard, and then – finally – his mouth formed almost a smile. “I’ll help you,” he said and carefully, they rose.

To no one’s surprise, she was a bit shaky on her feet. He stabilized her, and she fell against his chest. “You still haven’t told me about the mission,” she murmured.

He kissed her temple, fingers stroking her hair and back in an embrace. “It went well.”

That was all? Perhaps he also began to spare her now. But she could pester him later, because relief won over the need for details.

“And Mare? Losses?” That wasn’t a detail.

He altered his stance, to meet her eyes. “Mare is with us.”

Farley grinned like a fool and he grinned right back. How that elated her. She grabbed the fabric of his shirt. “I want to see you tell her you got me with child.”

He raised his eyebrows. “I thought we agreed we did it together?”

“We can be embarrassed together.”

He sobered. “Nothing embarrassing about it.”

Then he had a different recollection of all those times they told people. Delusions. Yet. Maybe he meant something else. His hand was on her belly again, right when the baby moved and he felt it, too. She saw his gladness, as well as excitement.

“I won’t leave you again,” he repeated with determination. A promise. She believed to find something important had shifted in him.

“Let’s go,” she said, not letting go of his arm to whole way to the infirmary. Mare lingered there, tapping her feet, likely waiting for something or someone.

“Mare, I’m sorry I just vanished –” Shade began but Mare didn’t hear a word as her jaw dropped at their sight.

Shade had been right. Farley didn’t feel embarrassed or ashamed this time. She was exclusively happy now Mare could be shocked by something as delightful as their baby and she laughed.

A/N 2: So, the book Shade's reading is acomaf, basically. Or an alternate universe version written a 1000 years in the future by a silver because fairy porn will never die. I'll elaborate on that in To Break A Storm.

@elliemarchetti @nortaeventcouncil @mareshmallow @maudthebookeater @lilyharvord @lucy-the-cat @justagirlwholovesstories @averyboterham @eliimaii @unknown198913

[rookschnapps]

Previous anon here! I would love to read how you did it. Im suprised you managed to did it in Google Docs. I thought you used a program similar to InDesign or programs that are more suitable for graphic design ANYWAY i am also curious how many chapters you used. Was it seven? Did you stop there because the length was convinient or because a story arc ended there? I am not really good at identifying where an arc begins and stops. okay bcgjkkcj THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME

YAYYY I LOVE TALKING ABOUT ARTS AND CRAFTS!!

gonna put this in main tags as well this time so:

this is my bookbind of trod pt 1 :] by @bamsara which u can and SHOULD read here

ok so this first bit is how I made the pdf and then the next bit is how I turned it into signatures for binding. Then the last bit is splitting up chapters and stuff. If anyone has any advice or tips on what I could do differently (for free or v cheap haha) please let me know!! This is so fun I love learning and discussing and making things

first thing I did was grab a real book so I could take a look at where they put the title page, where they left the pages blank, etc

I then formatted the title and contents and stuff in docs by messing with font and position on the page (etc) until it was to my liking! THEN I realised I wanted an image on the very first page so I went back and put that in. I got to design it it was sooo fun

OH. I ALSO STUCK A SHAMURA QUOTE WHERE THE DEDICATION WOULD BE. HEHE

thennn I went and changed all the heading, title and normal text options for the doc so that they looked nice! I used times new roman size 16 :) but that might be a bit big for most people. I like bigger text

^^ that step was important so that when I started copy-pasting in the text it would all come out the right size automatically. also so that my chapter titles and notes pages looked consistent

next I downloaded trod from ao3 as a html file! I found it works better than pdf bc there aren’t any page breaks

I just copied and pasted trod in one chapter at a time and added in the notes and summary for every chapter where I wanted it and that worked pretty well for me

THEN SPELLCHECK. I didn’t want to do it automatically (docs had some horrible opinions sometimes. Also kept trying to erase bits of the writing style that made perfect sense and sound beautiful???) so I had to confirm every change which took a while but I think was worth it

lastly I added page numbers. They did not want to cooperate with me and I still do not understand the tiny fuckers, but I managed to get them in the middle of the page for book 2 so it looks less weird (hurrah). There’s a button for it

then I saved it as a pdf!

OK NEXT THING : SIGNATURES

this post is my bestest friend (link is to a tumblr post that was really helpful)

and this webpage is how I got a pdf of the signatures (it’s the same one linked in the post)

CHAPTERS:

yeah I split it into chunks of 7 chapters! Book 1 ends on the argument in the field bc a) it was getting wayyy too long and b) I want to lend it to my friends and that’s a delightful emotional cliffhanger. Book 2 (which is actually finished. I’ll try and post photos later today or something) ends after hekets release from purgatory which is I thiiiink another 7 chapters? Book 3 is gonna be a bit longer bc I want to do it up to the most recent chapter, which I was gonna leave out bc of length but then it came out and I went insane haha

OH in book 2 I did drop caps and title decoration which I designed in procreate and then imported into docs and moved around as imported photos. I’ll put a bunch of pictures at the end too

THANK U FOR ASKING!!! If there’s anything else u want to know then let me know!! :]

[neim-batteries-not-included]

I’d love to hear about your bird guys!!! :D

tumblr is tripping balls today. also hi I got Wildly distracted midway through writing this. which is news to absolutely no one ajdbsjdbsj apologies

Bird dudes! (Context,) I’m homebrewin a big ol DnD campaign for a couple people (this is the Kunirn stuff I occasionally post about), the Bird Dudes are part of it ajdbsj. The two characters imma briefly yap about are gonna feature as NPCs but as of right now are essentially blorbos. I’m gon put this under a cut this is gonna be a long ass post lmao

The Bird Dudes are a homebrew race- I’ll dig up some sketches at some point, but vulture + harpy inspired (big fuckers, native to desert regions, wings + arms conjoined, and neck fluff n shit. because there was precisely no one around to stop me when I made that decision.)

Just to explain the words for the species, seeing as they’re taken directly from a conlang from Kunirn:

Feminine: krikǔ (singular)/krikǔu (plural)

Masculine: krili (singular)/krilip (plural)

Neuter: krikhǔ (singular)/krikhe (plural)

(The neuter form being used either to describe a group made up of multiple genders or group/individual that isn’t a man or woman. Gender fucky bird dudes are a big ol canon thing.)

Like I said I currently have 2 krikhe NPCs, Kik (he/xey) and B’âor (it/he). I’ll only give a summary n try not to go too much into the worldbuilding else we. Will be here all day. (Fun fact! Whilst both are masc leaning in some capacity, both are a krikhǔ)

Kik is a priest within Ækich’s (god(dess) of, amongst other things, souls) temple. He’s fairly low ranking and fairly young (equivalent of a human 24-ish year old), a good chunk of what xey do is treating the sick within the city (Rurlek) xey’re in. He’s essentially a cleric- fairly frequent magic user (the temple also does shite around translating texts, interpreting/aiding troubling dreams, etc. For the most part stuff related to communication n better connecting people), and dedicates the majority of his time to Ækich. Xey’re a tiny bit pathetic (affectionate). A sad lad. Wont go into much more with him bcs one of my players (hi lad) might see this ajdhsidj, if I give more details in another post I’ll properly spoiler warn it.

B’âor is a part of a travelling commune, (Khe Shumakhgo, though it’s often shortened to Shekhe since individual members started being called Ekhe). Again without going into to much detail because This Post Is Long Enough Already, they trade materials and information in exchange for food and/or shelter (in both directions). The group tend to travel and pick up people as they go, much of the commune is made up of outlaws, pilgrims, etc. B’âor, during canon being one of the older and longer standing members, has essentially ended up in an organisational position. And a bit of a dad. In my notes I refer to it as Dad Bird half the time ajfbsjdb.

This is incredibly rambly. And not even slightly proofread. But ajfbsjdb if you want any elaboration lemme know! I love bird dudes <3333

[theladysherlock]

Dylan made an infinitesimal bow at Volger. "Your Countship."

Volger nodded in return. Once the door was closed again, a tiny shiver went through Bovril.

"Have you two had some sort of a falling out?" Alek asked.

"A falling out?" Volger snorted. "We were hardly friends in the first place."

"'In the first place?' So you are on the outs with each other." Alek let out a dry laugh. "What's happened? Did Dylan talk back during his fencing lessons?"

The wildcount didn't answer, but rose from his desk and began to pace about the room. Alek felt his smile fade, remembering what they'd been discussing. But when the wildcount finally spoke, he said "How important is that boy to you?"

"A moment ago, Count, you were suggesting cold-blooded murder, and now you're asking about Dylan?"

"Are you trying to avoid the question?"

"No." Alek shrugged. "I think Dylan's an excellent soldier and a good friend. A good ally, I should add. He helped me get into that meeting today. Without him, we'd be sitting here without a clue as to what's happening on this ship."

"An ally." Volger sat back down, dropping his gaze to the map on his desk. "Fair enough."

I tried to condense this one too but there are too many small things that require context so we get a huge big chunk of text and lots of points. We carry on.

1. I want to point out that Alek clocked this IMMEDIATELY. These are the only words Dylan said to Volger in the entire scene and Alek's like "oh shit they're extra pissed at each other." He's not great with people as a whole, but I think he really understands his people.

2. Volger having beef with a fifteen year old will never not be funny. I think we're beyond Not Liking Your Kid's Friends here.

3. "How important is that boy to you" I am SHRIEKING. I'm not sure I'd go so far as to say this is a major theme in the book but it sure is a recurring question huh! How important is this boy to you??

4. I really really like Volger trying to piece together how fucked they all are if Alek finds out Dylan's secret. The two of them had a stare down earlier, just a brief one, but I like that he's trying to gauge whether Alek actually idolizes Dylan or if the boy was just bluffing.

5a. Another use of Ally as More Than A Friend (but Not Like That)! Obviously Alek is playing up Dylan's usefulness for Volger's sake, so "ally" makes sense, but it's still interesting. I should go back and count how many times ally/allies shows up in this series and check by book.

5b. Also, "ally" means different things to both of them. Volger sees it as being someone useful, more of a contractual relationship than a deeply personal one, but Alek ends up using it when "best friend" doesn't really cover the sheer depth of their loyalty to each other. There's more of this later when, I would argue, he's having a hard time recognizing his own romantic feelings because he's still convinced that those are allowed for Other People, not him.

[myalchod]

🦃

🦃 a big, meaty quote (JUST A BIG OL PARAGRAPH YOU WANNA SHARE)

Turkey, hmm? Oh, my dearest nonnymouse, if meaty you want, then I am all too ready to dump an excess of text here. From a random idea that lodged itself into my brain and refused to leave until I wrote it (and a chunk more) down.

Farah’s expression is bleakly remote as she looks down at the crib before them, and the tiny form swaddled within it. It would be easy for her, he knows; just because she has never killed with her magic does not mean she doesn’t know a handful of ways in which she could. She had, after all, been Rosalind’s star pupil for a reason. But she had never been quite the steel that Rosalind had wanted and so she closes her eyes, draws in a deep breath as she reaches for that power. She is certain this is what their commander had hidden, and Saul has no reason to doubt her instincts, and yet — Her eyes snap open, gleaming silver-blue, as he snatches the infant girl out of the crib and clutches her to his chest. He is less sanguine than she, though he is unconvinced she’s quite as comfortable with this as she may have convinced herself she is. “Saul,” she hisses, voice quiet but intense, “what the hell are you doing?” “She deserves a chance.” “It,” she emphasises the pronoun slightly, “is the weapon we came here to destroy to keep it out of Rosalind’s hands. Do I need to remind you of what happened at Aster Dell — and what she’d do if she could get her hands on something even more powerful than convergence?” “She,” he fires back, “is a child, Farah — a baby. She doesn’t know anything. We can —” He breaks off. She looks at him, eyebrows cocked in unmistakeable challenge. The magic crackles about her, alive with danger and possibility. It would be easy for her to end this here, but she would destroy more than just this tiny spark of a life, and he knows that she’s aware of that, and weighing his words.

[ ask me another? ]

[wishbonegame]

Apparently with all the chaos going on this year I forgot to post an update for March! Well, here's April's update instead.

Current Summer Y1 event progress: 5.5/8 fully implemented 6.5/8 scripted (roughly)

Current Summer Y1 quest* progress: 12.5/15 implemented 12.75/15 scripted

(*Note that this isn’t the count of unique quests but rather time-gated triggers to release new quest steps–some quests are counted several times if they are given in small chunks rather than all at once.)

The vast majority of Summer's quests are done. This includes the biggest multi-stage quest, which... actually mostly takes place in Fall, so unfortunately it won't be possible to complete in the upcoming Summer public beta. Which is a shame because it's got some really funny scenes and writing. Here's a tiny clip from one of them.

The remaining events are pretty big, but the script for the biggest one was just finished last weekend and I am currently working on implementing it. (It's pretty branchy, and is one of those things that's a lot faster to implement than to write)

I've done some minor cleanup/debugging as well, as usual. Fixing up little things... much like it looks like these characters are going to fix up this injured horse. Wonder what happened there...?

Another thing I'd like to add to the Summer Y1 public beta is the ability to preserve your save files. Any save files from the Spring Y1 beta we released earlier won't be compatible with releases going forward. The game initializer code has changed too much since then and trying to load a save would... not go well. But the game initializer code isn't changing much these days, so going forward, I'd like to build a framework for "patching" old save files. That way if you play the upcoming beta and then play another future beta later (or, eventually, the full game!) you don't have to lose your progress. So... gonna try to build that. No guarantee it'll work perfectly all the way through the final full game release, but it's worth a try!

The other major thing on my to-do list before the Summer public beta release is that I'd like to adjust the menu/text box contrast (a commonly requested tweak). Implementing more Ask About dialog (it's been written, but not implemented in game yet) is also part of the plan.

As always, thanks for following our cowboy madness project as it slowly moves closer to completion with each passing week. See you next month!

[thelaundrybitch]

*cackles madly as I drag this into your inbox*

Thank you for your patience. You shall thus be rewarded with some smaller chunks so you don't choke. Wouldn't want to lose you after becoming friends now would we? You've still yet to find me. 😏😎😈

So without further ado, thanks to you and all other interested parties, I present to you part 2! 🫡😘

Relapse

(Addiction Pt. 2 with pt. 3 coming soon!)

Relapse (N) a deterioration in someone's state of health after a temporary improvement, to turn for the worse

…

They say that the first step to overcoming a problem is to actually acknowledge that there is a problem to begin with. Which is all fine and dandy and totally makes sense. Except for one teeny tiny itty bitty little factor...

Acknowledging problems wasn't exactly Leo's forte. He had a nasty little habit of being in the business of actually creating problems.

Especially when it came to himself.

And this...thing...he had concerning with you was no different.

The fact Leo had "willingly" through the skin of his teeth and only after countless of sleepless weeks, admitted that he maaaaaay have had a slight addiction to you was actually a big step forward!

Personal growth even! He really ought to get a reward or something for being so self aware, cause like come on! This was some major serious self improvement!

So when you had told Leo and his brothers about your up coming girls trip out of country, Leo was totally not worried in the slightest.

He was proud of you for getting out instead of being holed up with your books of all things. It would be good for you to have some alone time with your girl friends.

Because as much as Leo just loved having a monopoly of your time with him and his brothers, Pizza Supreme in the sky, even he knew that spending constant time with them all could be a biiiiiiiit much.

They were just like THE coolest mutants in town and whatever. Obviously the close proximity to such heroes could be a bit emotionally draining to such a poor damsel as yourself (he wants to be your hero so bad it's not even funny)

So it made sense why you'd need a break.

If anything, it would be a good time to try and figure out his head (his heart) and his plan moving forward concerning you. A small period of abstinence, if you will, just to test himself. Get himself in the clear and whatever.

Besiiiiiides it was just a couple of days with your friends right? As his dear nerd of a brother would say, "Exasperated SCOFF!"

No biggie at all.

Because like sure, Leo was addicted to you, but he wasn't like...you know obsessed with you or anything.

He could handle a couple days without you, no problem.

…

However, once again in concordance to the luck of Leo's life (and that meaning none at all) you had just laughed and fondly reminded Leo that due to the additional traveling time, you would actually be away longer than a couple days, almost closer to a month.

And not to mention, while you'd be away for an aDdiTiOnAL COUPLE oF wEeks, you'd also be traveling through so many time zones and weren't exactly sure when and if you'd have Wi-Fi, so you wouldn't exactly be able to text them all as frequently as was custom.

Leo had just blinked at that for a moment, his brow ever so slightly furrowing as he mentally processed what exactly that meant...

Basically an entire month of little to no contact. With you. Period.

This...this was fine. Just... A small set back. Leo... Leo could handle this. The Faceman would have no trouble saving face.

In fact, the only outward sign of his slowly growing inner turmoil was the slight twitch in one of his eyes and the fractional tightening of his hands resting on the bulge of his tensing biceps.

So Leo did what Leo does best: he had just forced a small laugh and shook his head, smirking at you with a playful nudge of his elbow, warning you not to have too much fun without him.

It was just a couple extra days. Nothing to worry about. Nothing to worry about at all...

Right?

…

One and a half weeks later down and with one and half more still to go, Leo lay awake on his plastron with his face buried in a pillow, restlessly clawing at his sheets and cursing the name of friendship.

He should have never let you get on that damn plane, travel the with your damn girlfriends, having what he could only imagine was the damn time of your life.

If you really wanted to travel, FINE! You could travel. Take one of his stupid portals for all he cares. You could go where ever the shell you wanted to go and be back in a literal flash with enough time to spare to still go to dinner.

It would be better than knowing you were spending ridiculous amounts of time with people he didn't know about (and at this current moment could care less to meet since they took you away from him) and having fun with them when you could be back here, where you belonged, with him.

The handful of pictures that came through every couple of days with your bright smile and your now sun kissed, rosy cheeks was down right torturous.

You looked so happy, so carefree. Like an entire weight was lifted from your shoulders.

And Leo hated it.

He wanted to be the one to that kind of smile on your face (you didn't like them better did you? Had more fun than with him?).

Though he couldn't quite be sure what exactly he was feeling at the moment. Pettiness maybe. Loathing perhaps? Jealousy, most likely, if Leo were to be honest with himself. You know, for once.

Whatever the stupid feeling was, Leo knew that the spark was so hot and intense that the very thought of someone else taking your time and making you smile caused his shoulders to lock and his hands to subconsciously dig further into the blanket with a small groan.

This really was one of the worst ideas you had ever come up with, and Leo (the poor baby) had to live (suffer) with the consequences of you being gone.

He buried his beak further into the pillow with an angry huff, his arms wrapping around the padded squish and not for the first time, wondered if this is what it would feel like to hug you around your waist.

Would you let him press his face into the soft and plump skin of your stomach? Leo was sure it would make one helluva fine pillow. Much better than the limp piece of frabric he was currently strangling to death. Probably smell better too.

Would you cradle him against you? Hold him in your arms as he got comfortable? Gently scritch your nails down the back of his head and run your hands over his shell?

Would you let him get close to you like that? Both literally and metaphorically? Would being close to you like that finally give home the closure needed to let him drops his walls once and for all? Give him the rest that he so desperately yearns for?

Leo thought he was fine. He thought he could do this without you! This time apart was supposed to help him go cold turkey! Break this stupid, stupid, stupid addictive need to be with you.

But here he was restless, agitated, hurting and unable to sleep (for weeks thank you very much) so cursed was his ache without you.

He'd never needed anybody, never craved for anybody's presence the way he did with you.

Leo sighed again, grumbling into pillow with a small agitated whine. Why oh why did you have to go?

And take all of his peace with you?!

Being addicted to a person, Leo finally decided, finally admitted, was just...the absolute worst.

But these relapses?

Leo let out a small whimper and pulled the pillow over his head as he all but retreated into his sell.

He really didn't know how he was going to make it through another day without you.

…

All my love and happy suffering,

~AnOnYmOuS

RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

my GOLLY

MAN do I love me a tortured, pining, jealous Leo.

It's like you know me or something *squints*

THANK YOU FOR THIS TASTY MEAL ANON! I love it so much 😍🫶🏽

I'm very excited for the next part 👀👀👀

[supersnaill]

I'll take the bait. Please talk more about the model AU

Okay I'm kidding myself because I don't actually have much i can reveal about this au right nowwww but here are some random facts that don't spoil anything major:

Zelda owns a fairly large house in the suburbs and another manor out in the country. Since its so big she let's Link and Impa (and eventually mipha) all stay with her :)

Since this is a snail au mipha has a hell lot of unresolved trauma, and that makes her seem ooc at times (but is it really ooc if it makes sense in the story?)

Link is a security guard and the details of his job are sooo messy because idk what security guards do at modelling agencies x)

Zelda's dad owns the agency, meaning she has hella power

Sidon texts people in a million tiny chunks and will give you 100 notifications just telling you what sort of sandwich he had for lunch whereas mipha will send one word replies to everything (except her close buddies. Then she uses emojis and even cute cat reaction images lol)

Mipha has no magic here, but is still an exceptional healer and has pulled people back from the brink of death

She's also a light sleeper, unless she's with those she trusts or is super exhausted.

She almost always wears some sort of face or head covering to protect her identity in the public too, and rarely goes out without part of her brigade watching her back from afar

She also doesn't have any of the xora symbol jewellery, as its too identifying and could blow her cover x) she opts to wear four leaf clover symbols and other botanical things, and absolutely loves stuff that glints in the sun.

Link and Mipha often slept in the same room as kids when stuff got messy at either of their houses or just on sleepovers for fun~

Zelda is a terrible cook :<

[kazarinn]

I'm finishing up the retranslation for Saint Tail's anime right now, so I'm at the stage where I'm thinking about my next few projects, and I've currently at least decided that I want to do something for Megumi Tachikawa's other works as well. Tachikawa is an incredibly amazing writer, and it's such a shame that her work has been so poorly represented in translation; even beyond the fact that a good chunk of her work hasn't even been translated at all, the ones that were translated seem to have been run through the translation equivalent of a meat grinder.

I prioritized Saint Tail both because it's her most famous work and because it's the one that took the most damage (it's definitely pretty disturbing to find out that around half of the plot was translated to suggest the opposite of what it was actually supposed to mean!), but I do want to call attention to Cyber Idol ☆ Mink (localized by Tokyopop as Mink), generally considered to be Saint Tail's spiritual sequel. Unlike with Saint Tail, the Tokyopop release of Mink didn't flip it horizontally, and it doesn't have incomprehensible nonsense lines like "Great Big Deal!!" that Saint Tail's release did, but...well, I think some examples would demonstrate it better.

Here's Tokyopop's version of a spread from chapter 6:

And here's the proof of concept I sent to my group when pitching this series (done very quickly, so definitely not my best work, but probably enough to get the point across), which was translated directly from the Japanese text:

...Huh? That's not even remotely similar! The original scene is meant to draw a clear parallel between Mink's view of the chocolate and her view of herself, and the progression of the scene plays on the ambiguity of whether "あたしじゃなくて" means "this isn't from me" or "this isn't me". The reason Mink is considered to be Saint Tail's spiritual sequel is that it explores similar concepts of self-identity and the feeling of inadequacy compared to an idealized, sanitized self, something Mink is even less subtle about than Saint Tail was at times, but the nuance here seems to have been lost in translation. (In fact, I'm not entirely sure what must have led to the Tokyopop version's interpretation; the Japanese text doesn't resemble what's there at all.)

Which also means that when you get to later parts of the series like this...

(Tokyopop version)

(Our proof of concept retranslation)

In this case, the Tokyopop version roughly corresponds to the Japanese text but interprets it in ways that really don't get the point of this scene very well, ranging from not catching the specific use of "small and tiny" (ちっぽけな) invoking the earlier scene with the chocolate to making too many specific assumptions about Mink and Kyo's feelings that are actually out of character. (Let alone the fact that the way they phrase Mink's lines here really just doesn't convey the sheer level of desperation and emotion at all...)

For instance, it's a very important part of Mink's character that she doesn't have self-awareness about wanting to feel needed; she says 必要としてくれるなら because she legitimately feels like she's useless or has nothing to offer without the help of the WANNA-BE program. This kind of thing is a common trait of Tachikawa protagonists, and while I know many people might think it's not that big of a deal, I think the difference between "wanting attention and thinking your alter ego is cooler" and "having insecurity from believing you'll never be good enough unless you blot out all the undesirable parts of yourself" is big enough to mean something to a lot of people who would be reading this!

In any case, once I'm done with Saint Tail, I do have some other projects I want to prioritize first, since Mink's official translation is at least somewhat readable (kind of a low bar, but...). But I did want to call attention to this for now in case anyone was interested, because while Saint Tail and Mink are far from the only shoujo or magical girl manga from this era to have such poor treatment in localization, I don't think this issue has been well-documented when it comes to Tachikawa's work, and it really does break my heart.