#the hyperfixation certainly do be hyperfixating
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And thus, with the passing of 24 hours, Caeru's ambition truly comes to an end. Major Nemesis spoilers below the cut- we're talking endgame ambition business here. Mostly on a character RP front.
The Doomed Scientist made quite a few... choice decisions, in the end. Killing Cups once and for all, recording his story as one of grief-
And sparing what little remained of Mr Mirrors, leaving it free to roam Parabola as it sees fit.
Some of them, he can explain. Others, he's still left to feel... discontent.
Cups needed to die. That much was certain from the start. It was a tyrant, as all Masters are, and complicit in the bargaining and eventual destruction of four (potentially five) cities, as all Masters are. It was an obstacle. A murderer. A petty monster that felt no remorse even on its deathbed, and it went out of its way to ruin multiple lives just because it felt owed its own sick and twisted idea of revenge.
It killed his first love. It looked him in the eyes and he knew what it had done and he knew from the start it was going to die.
Perhaps, in the end, it knew too. And yet it still pleaded, and wanted to live, and-
It made a bargain.
A bargain Caeru didn't take.
Not because he didn't want to. Gods, he wanted to. He wanted it. He wanted it more than anything else in the world. To have Greylu back, to give him the gift of life, of love, to show him the wonders of the Neath and the beauty of the correspondence and all of the people Caeru has met and loved and found home with along the way-
But. He couldn't.
Because Cups was a monster. And no matter what, it deserved to die. And he could not, in good conscience, allow it to live.
Even if sparing it meant everything he's ever wanted.
So he's left here, now. With a bloodied traveling coat, and a bloodsoaked knife, and a favor finally fulfilled.
And nothing to live for. No resurrected lover, no charming visits to Helicon, no slow dances in the living room, no memories to rebuild and lives to live and he won't live again-
Nothing. All he has is a coat born of obligation, not to his love, but to people he's never even met. To lives he's never even touched. To a paramour, still alive, with hair of rose-pink, who doesn't even remember her own brother's existence.
Cups didn't die for Caeru's sake. Cups died for the sake of all who wanted it dead. For the revenger's court, and the ghost screaming in his ear, and the reckoning that will not be postponed indefinitely.
And Caeru, who acted as a tool to carry out their wills? Who all but betrayed his own lover, just to satisfy a cause he never knew existed?
All Caeru is left with, is regret. Regret-
-And grief.
#yin-thoughts#fallen london#fallen london spoilers#nemesis spoilers#so! nemesis huh!#i have. a lot of thoughts#overall i think heart's desire remains closest to my heart#but that's almost certainly bc of the obvious ''you always remember your first'' bias#there's a lot of problems with nemesis that have been talked to death by other people way more eloquently than i could ever express#(the big notable stopgates littered throughout. the weird pacing at the end. the fact you never meet your actual nemesis til the finale)#but overall i still liked it a lot!! i loved it actually!!! it singlehandedly made me like cups as a master!!!!#not because of anything nemesis actually DID mind you. i just really liked making up things about it#in place of nemesis. actually featuring it.#which could either be a plus or a minus against the ambition depending on what angle you look at it from#but. yeah. i'd say i enjoyed it. i enjoyed it a whole bunch#and now that ive played 2 out of the 4 ambitions and my FL hyperfixation evidently isnt letting up#it's safe to say we're all here for the long haul#tune in (insert miscellaneous time in the future) for when i finally after like a year and a quarter#get to find out what the fuck truly goes down in light fingers#and also keep an eye out for that caeru-centric fic ive been unsubtly alluding to and still need to write.#ive got a whole outline for it and it's. well#you'll all see when (if?) i finish it#i have some ideas abt how i wanna play around with the nemesis endings + what they mean to caeru#(and i do mean endings as in both of them)#and it all may seem. insane. when we get there#but i swear i have a direction plotted in my head#i swear#scoundrelventures#<- the scoundrel isnt mentioned At All in this post but that works as a general FL oc lore tag
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Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like if we got an 8-Bit Animaniacs game...
#ā Star's Art ā#Animaniacs#Animaniacs 1993#Yakko Warner#Wakko Warner#Dot Warner#The Warner Siblings#Aseprite#Sprite Art#Coolness#Rule Number Eighty-One: If I find myself with a new hyperfixation... I WILL draw sprite art for it.#And Animaniacs is certainly no exception!#You might have noticed I steered clear of referring to this piece as an 'NES-styled Animaniacs title screen'#And that's because I know I'll more than likely get a comment that this isn't accurate to the limitations of the system#Which is true. Initially I set out for this to BE NES styled before it ended up as something better...#My own spriting style! šāØ#Granted I still used both the NES and NTSC NES color palettes to color this piece#When you're not going by strict limitations... a piece of this caliber becomes a lot more fun to draw!#I'm half tempted to do a SNES-styled logo of the 2023 iteration of the Animaniacs logo. I think that would look neat#I'm also very much open to spriting a V2 version of this logo as I understand there's a version with Pinky and the Brain too#I think there's just enough pixels for me to make it work!#P.S. - I still don't know when I'll start posting on the regular again. Just wanted to get this piece out since I had it on me
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I really wish there was more love or even acknowledgement of hyperfixations/special interests that arenāt. Media/fandom related. It feels like im always seeing people claim the common experience of having either one is just a cycle of āao3- fanfiction- fanart- headcanonsā ect and thatās. Literally not possible for a lot of, if not most of my special interests. At least, I really donāt think I should be able to put in the satanic panic or the Jonestown massacre into ao3. A couple weeks ago I spent days fixated on 9/11. It was a constant thought in my brain no matter what I was doing. Sometimes I get hyperfiaxtions I donāt even particularly like, they donāt bring me joy, but I feel this constant incessant craving to just research and research and talk about them non stop which is really difficult because theyāre often things that people donāt really want to hear about. Thereās a lot more to hyperfixations and special interests than just media consumption. Lots of love to non media/non fandom related special interests and hyperfixations from me.
#adhd#autism#hyperfixations#special interest#audhd#I feel strongly about this because it just feels#isolating at times#sometimes it feels like people use the terms to Only mean fandom related stuff#which certainly is some peopleās special interests ect#but not all of us got that kind of autism lmao#I got. incredibly good at learning about bad things kind of autism#I canāt tell you the Zelda timeline but I do use the anniversaries of#the titanic sinking and the Chernobyl disaster to remember peopleās birthdays#because I remember the disasters better than I do birthdays
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i uh. i think i have a Lesbian crush.
#i haven't had a crush in years and certainly not on a girl oh god i'm stressed#she's sooo pretty and cute and funny and likes the same things as i do#and she makes a point of always coming to talk to me and touch me and always laughs at my jokes and asks my opinion#oh and she's bi like me we've talked about that a lot#butterflies!!!!!#but she works in the other branch of my job and lives on the other side of the city :(#plus i've never dated anyone let alone another woman and my parents don't approve that i'm bi :((#but anyway it's nice to have a reason to live outside of a hyperfixation!!!#do my dykes out there have any flirting tips
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Gay Men?
Gotta love 'em
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WHY do the PONY have BOOBS?????
#shopping for mlp merch with my big girl adult money and seeing all this BULLSHIT#I just want a cute little acrylic charm or print??? what is this shit ??????#looking back at being in the internet in my youth with a mlp hyperfixation⦠hm that was certainly a traumatizing experience#being bullied by grown ass men for liking my little pony as a CHILD.#I wonder how theyāre doing now⦠theyāre probably discord mods as a full time job
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I'm aware this is super niche but I would just like to manifest Hiroshi Kamiya as the voice of a main character in DQXII. Thank you and that is all.
#it would please the hyperfixation demons in me#yes i know he already did mogsworth in dq treasures and terry in dqh but im feeling greedy i guess#but those are just spinoffs#(yes i know terry technically is a main game character but we didnt get the voice in the main game now did we)#as a longtime fan of the dragon quest franchise#please if yuji horii sees this#if it is at all possible#give that man a role#sidenote i certainly hope dq12 doesnt get screwed over by the fact that the one production guy left#plus the fact that square enix is currently doing whatever the heck theyre doing#so also i guess id just like to manifest the game in general#but yeah as someone who is also obsessed with levi ackerman i would very much appreciate a crossover#(again)#hiroshi kamiya#levi ackerman#aot#dragon quest#dqxii#dq12#dq11#dqxi#yuji horii#also if anyone is actually reading this and is interested in making a dragon quest friend lmk lol
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Still kind of amazed that this blog has been around for...7 years? Like, the time REALLY flows by...
#like i made this blog a year before zero's journey came out!!!#i was still in high school#looking back on it i certainly miss and don't miss some things about the old days#i'm glad i've grown as a person and how i respond to things and gradually stepping off of social media for a bit of time helped#i was definitely in the Extreme Hyperfixation where i starved myself and obsessively searched for tnbc news in every hour of my days#i'm glad there's still a lot going on and it's not like. a dead fandom or anything. but i do miss my old friends and mutuals#that i've lost over time#but it definitely gets quiet a lot of the time. i still am obsessed with this movie and it just doesn't go away???#i sometimes wish i could move onto other things like all my old friends did but#i'm still here with the same interests same blog same thing and sometimes that makes me feel Lonely#i still run the discord and it's lots of fun! but#man.
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you know me having some alters that are fictives makes a lot of sense. i mean, internet, animanga, games, all of that stuff, like it's not surprising that my brain went "hey let's take these characters' traits to help you survive" but also.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO SURVIVE WHEN MY FICTIVES ARE BASED ON THESE GUYS
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO SURVIVE IN THESE CONDITIONS!!
#my brain making fictives based on characters that are not mentally stable at all: ābitches please. surviveā#we have another pjsk fictive too actually! she's very shy tho.. she doesn't use internet that much..#it's interesting how my brain went for pjsk characters even though its not a hyperfixation of mine#like it's certainly one of my main interests but it's not on my mind 24/7 you know?#also its interesting how my brain went for these two bc i also kin characters that i ship with them... huh...#anyway say hi to winter they're working really hard on our assignments rn#do NOT say hi to cherry she's distracting winter and making them take a āare you an alpha or sigmaā quiz#[ šļø šš¾ šŗšš½ ššš¾ š»ššš!! ]#[ š š„š¢š§š ššš„š¤š¬ ]
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Just becoming obsessed with the dynamic between two characters and then thinking every song I hear would be a good amv for them don't mind me it'll pass
#did I become obsessed because they reflect what is already in my taste and appears in my music#or do I see their shadows everywhere despite how different the topics are because I've become obsessed#Who knows certainly not me#free me from my own hyperfixations
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Upon finding myself in the midst of hyperfixating on Looney Tunes thanks to my bestie @shrimpuufriend, I noticed that there's a distinct lack of sheep characters throughout the series' multi-show run.
What say I fix that with a new S/I? šāØ
#ā Star's Art ā#Looney Tunes#The Looney Tunes Show#TLTS#Fursona#Sheep Fursona#Self-Insert#S/I#Trans Women#Coolness#Hello Looney Tunes fandom!#It's really weird to think that my last Looney Tunes tagged post was all the way back in 2020#Yet three years later I find myself returning to the tag in light of recent hyperfixation-adjacent eventsā thanks Shrimp!#Like I do with any media I fixate on I drew a feasibly designed self-insert and in Looney Tunes' case it was for two reasons#The first reason being that the artstyle of The Looney Tunes Show uses colored outlines and I REALLY wanted to try that out#I almost never draw with colored outlines so I thought it'd make for a fun exercise... which it certainly did!#The second reason being because I'll be needing it for self-ship reasons...#... but you'll hear about how badly I want to kiss Lola Bunny over on my self-ship blog in due time š#Definitely going to be drawing more of this sheep very soon! šāØš³ļøāā§ļø
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somehow gardening autism is not a garden-variety autism and, i for one, am frutrated by this
#please please please ask me gardening questions#indoor. outdoor. tropical. crops. succulents#orchids. flowers. shade or sun. desert or bog.#I LOVE TALKING ABOUT PLANTS SO MUCH OKAY#but damn never everyone i know has a black thumb š#if you ever have plant questions literally dm me i do not give a fuck#or send me an ask#it will take me s thousand years to respond probably#but i will eventually#i was originally gonna post this raw and tagless#yknow like in silence or whatever. i guess#but i just. guys i really fucking love plants and animals#ask me reptile and fish questions I'll love u forever#two years i worked at a pet store as the director of our entire live department#rodents birds fish reptiles inverts etc#and yea obviosuly working at a pet store aint shit#but im realizing as i type this how much hyperfixation contributed to burnout there#because our corporate standards were objectively shit#and as a (for lack of better terms) Sassy Franchiseā¢#i had a goddamn LOT of fuck around freedom#so i regularly spent my days off researching best practices for species we kept#in addition to creating custom tank labels with expanded care information#and my days after work staying up until 2 or later. researching. learning.#ive read certain articles on species or aspects of herp care no less than 4 times#because my brain would NOT let it go#i think i had a point. originally.#but i have most certainly lost the fuckin thread of it so.#that's that on fucking that i guess!#drunk posting
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Ok so Iāve had this question for a while and I feel like youāll be able to give me a good answer. I understand that weāre absolutely not supposed to support anything JKR does monetarily and I never intend to do so. However is engaging with Harry Potter media *at all* also something I should not do or is it only things that give her money?
Like, would there be anything wrong with me playing Hogwarts Legacy if I pirated it? Is fanfiction and fan art ok to consume? Or is engaging with the IP at all going to be harmful in a way that I donāt see atm?
Thank you for your time!
I don't really think a cis person is the right person to ask about this, but I also know that trans people are sick to death of having to field these questions so I'll do my best to answer this, if everyone who reads my answer will promise me that you will NOT use anything I say in this post as an annoying argument against a trans person who has a different opinion on the matter. Remember whose opinions are actually important here.
And look, number one, you can do whatever the fuck you want. Nobody can stop you. If you, in yourself, in your soul, feel morally comfortable consuming Harry Potter by some convoluted method of Ethical Consumptionā¢, then go and do that, and own it, and have the strength to be judged for your decisions.
Trans people might not trust you - hell, I'll probably not trust you either. They might get angry at you, and criticize you, or roll their eyes and call you a fucking loser. If you have the moral conviction that what you are doing is right, and that you are acting in accordance with your beliefs and you are not doing harm, then stand by that conviction and face the consequences. Have that strength of character.
But if you feel the need to go around posting and arguing that it's unfair, that you shouldn't be judged, that you should get to be a special exception and people are unreasonable when they get mad at you... then that is evidence, proof positive, that you are a fucking loser. That you are cowardly, and you don't actually believe that what you are doing is right, you just want the world to affirm your fragile ego while you enjoy your little treats.
To be clear, I am not accusing you of doing this (you seem to just earnestly be asking for guidance), but there's a hell of a lot of people who do do this, and you don't want to be one of them.
So that's number one. Do whatever the fuck you want, and face the consequences with a spine.
Number two is... just fucking drop it. That is my earnest advice to you. Just fucking drop Harry Potter. They are children's books from the early 2000s, they just are not that fucking good or important. The Hogwarts Legacy game is live service slop; the movies are passable at best and their quality comes from the actors being better than the source material. Just drop it. Harry Potter has nothing to offer that you can't get elsewhere from better media with better authors, or problematic authors who have good grace to at least be dead.
Don't waste your life thinking about complicated ways to circumvent the moral problem of JK Rowling's rancid transphobic hate-aura at the center of the franchise, don't waste your finite time on Earth trying to thread that stupid needle. Harry Potter isn't worth this. Rowling is old, and shriveling from hate and mold fumes, at the very least just wait for her to fucking die, and for her political project to fail, before you pick that world back up again.
I speak as someone who read the first book at age 11, hyperfixated on relating to Harry, and whose entire cultural life was consumed by the franchise for over a decade. It is not worth it. You don't need it, you don't need the stress of trying to navigate how or whether to engage with it ethically. You almost certainly have an enormous backlog of other books, games, movies and TV shows you've been meaning to get around to, so just go do that instead. I promise you it will be infinitely more rewarding, and infinitely less compromised by stress and guilt and cognitive dissonance.
And while you're at it, send some money to a trans charity and go scream invectives at a transphobic politician some time.
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ā¦thereās always someone bent on breaking the world.
... so I slipped and drew Dragon Age again.
Did I have 50 free hours to spend? I didnāt.
Do I have a rekindled obsession with the franchise that formed me as a person and I haven't hoped to get more of? Yup.
Can I spend these 50 hours I didnāt have hyperfixating on my obsession with barely managing to do anything else besides (š¤”š¤”š¤”)?
Oh certainly!!
I have this Dragon Age Artbook that has a tapestry with characters' faces all over the first 2 pages and I was always so in awe and I wanted to do something like that too. I canāt be more hyped, I havenāt hoped after 10 years to have more of this world (that I can talk about 3 hours straight no kidding) and still canāt really believe it please tell me I havenāt dreamed it!!
#dragon age#dragon age inquisition#the dread wolf rises#veilguard#veilguard summer#solas#dai#fanfridays#i just love this game so much#fenharel
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May we get some crk thoughts, my liege? I too have a hyperfixationā
Shadow Milk Cookie Headcannons (SFW & NSFW)
šThank you for the excuse to write this shit, I feel less insane being asked to do it lol. I still think this might taint my public image, so lets hope none of my future employers fuck with tumblr. Anyway only smc since he's who I'm obsessing over. I was gonna add pv, but I write wayyyy too much to include both of them on one post. Maybe I'll do him if someone asks nicely. I'll have a mix of both sfw and nsfw so beware lol.
MDNI (I'll find u)
TW: Shadow Milk Cookie; Obsessive behaviors; Stalking mentioned; Nsfw under the cut; unedited
Info: Shadow Milk Cookie x Reader; Sfw & Nsfw headcannons
Credit for Beast Bite Idea: @rollingeevee (go give them love I adore this AU)
-To start I'm gonna say, he's insane, like genuinely. He leans into a lot of yandere-esque behaviors, but I firmly believe he's not a full-on yandere, just really fucked up in the head (trauma and such, poor thing, wah wah wah.)
-Pre-Corruption Shadow Milk surely had a lot of admirers, but admiration is very different from genuine love and connection. He was, in a very literal sense, on a different level than all the cookies on earthbread. He's immortal, a god meant to care for all cookies, romantic relationships with cookies (other than the other heroes) just aren't an option in his mind. (For the sake of these, none of the beasts have had any romantic interaction with him, because I don't wanna deal with that can of worms rn.)
-All that to say, it's highly unlikely he has much experience in relationships. Maybe he's had flings, and some sexual encounters, but I doubt he would commit to someone he would inevitably lose to time. And, sure, he certainly could artificially extend their lifetime... but that's unethical and unfair to his partner. The burden of immortality is not one a regular cookie is baked to bear.
-So when he is inevitably corrupted and sealed away, romance isn't really a thought on his mind. He's very fixated on escaping that stupid tree and enacting his revenge. Which he does, at least in part, and with his freedom comes half of his powers and ensuing chaos.
-There are not many ways he could meet you if I'm quite honest, so I'll leave that up to personal interpretation. However you do meet him, though, you have to be intriguing. He gets bored of people easily, so you have to stand out -- be that in your demeanor or the way you speak or how you challenge him, it just has to be interesting. Once he's interested he's hooked.
-He's rather... mmm... obsessive? He likely stalks you for a while before he makes any moves. He wants to learn your patterns, the cookies you surround yourself with, the things you like, your job, your favorite foods, what flowers you like, and how do you feel about his chaos? He'll even manipulate things around you, just to see how you might react. (Is it fucked up? Yeah, lol! But isn't it equally endearing? He seems to think so.)
-You have frequent reoccurring dreams about him in this period of time. You've only seen him from a distance at this point, but you can't quite shake him from your thoughts. What's very important here is that you realize that your thoughts are not your own. Acknowledge that he's watching, and make sure that he's aware you're aware. Be that by purposefully doing something he could recognize as acknowledgment, or outright saying that you're aware he's messing with you. He values curiosity and intelligence in a person, if you can break yourself out of his cycle he's 100% sold on you.
-It doesn't take much longer after that for him to make his first official appearance. Bowing gracefully in front of you as he materializes from thin air, smiling like a man driven mad by infatuation.
-Believe it or not, he's really not all that creepy or pushy. He's very playful and charming, and while you have the knowledge he'd been watching you for a long time at this point, it's hard not to fall for him. He flirts with an ease that no other cookie really has, and he's so very funny never failing to get a smile out of you at his jokes.
-Now, this may go against what others characterize him as a lot, but I don't believe he's the type to steal you away and lock you up. Shadow Milk is a cookie who wants to be wanted, he doesn't want his feelings to be entirely one-sided, it would really hurt him to pour himself into someone who does not want to reciprocate his passions.
-He's unbelievably patient with you. Despite what the mental manipulation from earlier implies, he allows you to set the pace and make the moves, mostly nudging you gently in the direction he wants you to go now that he has your attention. Again, he wants you to choose him. He wants you to love him, so he will happily wait as long as it takes for you to realize and accept your longing for him.
-He gives you the flowers you like, and listens to you talk about your exceedingly boring days (with rapt attention, of course, he loves listening to you talk as much as he loves talking). If you ask, he'll take you anywhere you'd like to go on earthbread with a snap of his fingers, showing you sights you'd only dreamed of seeing. (Whether or not these are illusions are still up for debate).
-It's very hard not to fall for him with all this considered, and he knows that of course. He was just waiting for you to confess, and you have to confess. He won't do it even if you make it clear you want him to. It's not something he'd ever admit to you -- or himself -- but he doesn't want to risk even the slightest bit of rejection. It would break him more than he's already been broken, so you'll have to do it for our poor little jester.
-When you do though? Oh, he's over the moon! Practically swooning as he scoops you up and spins you around in celebration. He's so overjoyed. He is wanted, there is someone in this world who loves him genuinely. There's no false platitudes or any worshipping done, just raw affection between the two of you. (Just the tiniest bit of manipulation at the start, but obviously you've dismissed and forgiven that at this point).
-Again, he doesn't immediately take you away from your life if you don't wish to be. He does heavily encourage you to come spend your days with him, though. He can take care of you, he's literally a god, you'll never ever want for anything so long as he can control it (which he can, duh).
-I feel it very important to emphasize that in a relationship with him, you are equal. Even if you literally cannot be equal in stature and power, you are equal in the relationship -- if anything you have more sway over him than he does over you. He's very, very in love with you, and he will do just about anything you ask of him so long as it doesn't interfere with obtaining his souljam.
-Having established that, let's get to the fun stuff.
-Shadow Milk Cookie is very physically and verbally affectionate. If you are around him it's likely he's touching you in some way. Whether that's him literally hanging off you like a baby monkey or just a hand on your arm, he likes to have a physical tether to you.
-Plenty of messy wet kisses all over your cute little face, he loves seeing you get all flustered and feeling your dough burn up from his barrage of affections.
-It's also very common for him to carry you around in various different styles. Over the shoulder, piggback, princess style, like a sack of potatoes... doesn't really matter. It's also a regular occurrence that you fall asleep as he floats around the spire of all knowledge. He doesn't need sleep, and he does not sleep often, but he likes holding you while you do so. It's proof of your trust in him, and he usually uses the time you are sleeping to be more genuinely affectionate. Soft words whispered in your ears bringing you sweet dreams as he runs his hands up and down your back, kissing the crown of your head with such love it would make a grown man blush.
-He calls you cute little nicknames, like shortcake or sweet thing. The most common, and his favorites, are doll/dolly and little star. (Little star is something he hums with such affection it makes you weak in the knees. You know he's feeling more adoring when he uses it.) Talks about how cute you are, how pretty you are, how desirable you are. How any cookie would be so lucky to have you -- too bad they could never compete with him!
-That being said, most of his affections are pretty surface-level stuff at the start of the relationship. At least, what you get to see. He has a hard time opening up to others, he's a very sensitive cookie deep down in his dough. It takes quite a while to get him out of his shell and start showing you who he is as himself.
-Who he is, is a very aching cookie. He lost so much, struggled with his own corruption, and still hasn't fully accepted it himself. He feels as though he has been betrayed and discarded by everything he once loved, it's no wonder he has a hard time showing you such ugly sides of himself.
-You warm him up, melt him slowly, and you get to see peaks of genuine love and adoration behind those heterochromatic eyes. He may never allow you to see all of him at once, but you do get to know him. If you continue to love him despite seeing the uglier side of things, there is a distinct shift in the way he showers you in affection.
-Initially, he's very showy with everything, his love is a spectacle for the two of you to watch. It's almost like he's put himself outside of the relationship rather than in it. After he opens up, it's quieter, more intimate. He's more involved in it, like it's less about showing you how much he loves you, and more about sharing that mutual feeling between the two of you.
-You didn't have much room to show him how much you cared for him, but now you do. He allows you to initiate physical affection and doesn't flinch away at the touch. He accepts your words of admiration for what they are, not questioning your intentions for any reason.
-Kisses are softer, more full of emotion. Less like he's drowning you and more like he's trying to swallow you up. Desperation to have you as close to him as possible can take him over quite frequently during make-out sessions, and they leave you breathless and fuzzy rather than burning and flustered.
-Now, you can't write Shadow Milk without acknowledging how fucking jealous he is all the time. Now, I believe it's less of a jealousy thing (though, that really is something that is frequent), and more of a possessive/protective thing.
-He doesn't get jealous of the average cookie, alright, not unless you show interest for whatever reason. They're not really a threat to him, and why would they be? He's secure enough to know that you wouldn't leave him for some random half-baked simpleton. HOWEVER, he DOES get jealous of the other beasts and especially Pure Vanilla Cookie.
-The other beasts aren't as powerful as him, but they're still powerful and cunning (some of them at least). Truly, on a level of divinity and ability to care for you, they are his closest competition. Even still, he only gets jealous if one of them seems to want to stake a claim on you, or you become too fascinated with one of them.
-If neither is the case, he highly encourages you to form relationships with them. They are cookies that, seemingly, he cares for. While they can be difficult to get along with, if you are someone Shadow Milk deems worth his time, you are someone they will also deem worth their time.
-Ah, I should also mention he gets... pouty about Black Sapphire and Candy Apple. He doesn't see either of them as a threat, so I couldn't say he's jealous... he just gets annoyed when you're being attentive to them when he's around. Black Sapphire is smart enough to set hard boundaries with you to start, for both of your sakes, but your relationship with him is very positive. You are Shadow Milk Cookies partner, after all, you're a very important Cookie and Black Sapphire has no reason to be unkind to you.
-Candy Apple Cookie on the other hand is the one who's jealous here. You find her positively adorable and her little crush on Shadow Milk is nothing but endearing in your eyes, but she very much is huffy about your relationship with him. Of course, she can't do anything to you, that would only turn against her in the end so she just pouts. You can win her over slowly, though, just by being sweet to her and comforting her when Shadow Milk rejects her once again.
-Your relationship with them seemingly pleases Shadow Milk, though you can't really tell if he's happy or not. Sometimes he seems pleased, other times he's pouty, so who really knows other than him.
-However, the cookie that really seriously gets under his skin the most is Pure Vanilla. He does everything in his power to keep the two of you as far away from one another as possible, but it's almost inevitable that you meet PV, especially when he becomes Truthless Recluse.
-Pure Vanilla is everything Shadow Milk is not. Kind, gentle, patient, soft-spoken, and of course truthful. He's very afraid you may meet PV and realize that you do not want to be with him anymore. You would rather have someone like Pure Vanilla Cookie to dote on you in a fashion that he cannot bring himself to do openly yet.
-Of course, you don't, but that doesn't stop the fear from seeping into his dough. The only way to ease him is by being patient and displaying your loyalty through and through. He won't really be calm until Pure Vanilla is take care of, but you can assure him that you won't be leaving him for his other half anytime soon.
-Circling back to his possessive and protective tendencies, Shadow Milk does see you as an object of his affection. He is fully aware you are your own cookie, you are not something he ever wishes to control entirely and remove autonomy from, but you are his. His to keep and love and protect.
-He's very obsessive about your well-being and happiness. If something hurts you (alive or not), it's gone, destroyed. He won't even make a show of it, it just disappears. If you are upset, he is there doing everything to make you feel better. Whatever you want, whatever you need! He's here for you, please rely on him (he needs you to rely on him).
-If you are out and about he keeps an eye on you, which you are aware of. It's rather obvious, so even if he doesn't tell you, you can feel him watching you. Ignoring it becomes easier with time, but if anything happens to you he wastes no time in popping up and taking care of whatever happens.
-This leads into my next headcanon (inspired by the ever-talented @rollingeevee go check them out!), he has a bite of sorts that he uses as a means of monitoring you. It's something he uses to pinpoint where you are at all times, even when he's not monitoring you actively. The bite acts as a connection between you and him, emotionally and physically tying the two of you together.
-You can feel what he feels through the bite, anger, sadness, joy, pretty much anything he feels you can feel. It also acts as a reminder to you that you should not stray too far from where he is, sending an uncomfortably heavy feeling through your dough. (This is a manifestation of his worry, and it only really happens when he notices you've gone somewhere a little too far from the safety of the spire).
-However, this goes both ways. He can also feel what you feel at the same intensity that you feel it. You can, likely less so, also tell where he is. There is a pull in the back of your mind from the magic telling you where to find him at all times, and it only lets go when you are in proximity of him. If you miss him, he feels the same heavy feeling in his dough reminding him that you would like him by your side.
-Now, finally, we have to address the topic of mortality. Shadow Milk is likely more aware than you ever will be of how mortal you really are. This is why he's so very protective and possessive of you, he doesn't want to lose you prematurely.
-However, if you are okay with it, he is completely fine with artificially extending your life span. In fact, he does it happily. He might even start doing it without asking if the topic hasn't been broached in a certain amount of time. He wants to spend as long as you'll allow him by your side, and if that means breaking a few rules of magic and cookie society then so be it. He's a god after all, he doesn't have to answer to anyone (other than the witches).
-Anyway, let's get to the shit you freaks are really here for. (Me, I'm freaks.)
-I don't really think sexual intimacy is something Shadow Milk desires all that much, but he more so likes it because it's... interesting? I'm sure he derives physical pleasure from sexual intercourse, but less so than the average cookie might. Most of his enjoyment comes from seeing you enjoy yourself.
-It goes without saying, but Shadow Milk Cookie is a freak. He's into pretty much anything under the sun (except maybe one thing...), and so long as you're down to try something he's happy to oblige you.
-He is a switch, but he leans dom most of the time, and you won't get him to sub early on in your relationship. That requires a bit too much trust for him, so he'll need time to be cool with giving you that kind of control over him. But he will bottom for you as your relationship progresses, and that's a whole different side to him.
-Lets start with him in a dominant role, though, since it's more common to get from him.
-Obviously, he's a tease, through and through. He loves to watch you squirm and react to the things he does. Tantalizingly light touches drawn over your dough, teeth grazing your soft body almost piercing but never quite getting deep enough, heated breath blown over your most sensitive spots but never relieving you with his mouth as you so desperately need.
-Truthfully he could spend another thousand years just tracing over you, committing each inch to memory until he's satisfied in knowing every inch of you. Unfortunately, (or fortunately), he's not nearly as patient in the bedroom as he is outside of it. Not with all of you on display for him, so trusting and open, ready for him to defile you. Oh, his sweet, sweet little dolly~
-Even with his impatience, his teasing does not stop. His hands continue to ghost over you, making sure you're still squirming even as he succumbs to his need to taste you.
-Oh, and tastes you he does. He doesn't have to subscribe to regular cookie physical limitations, so he somehow manages to swallow you whole. Jaw unhinging so he can get as much as he needs from you, tongue splitting itself to give you attention everywhere, and god is it long and dexterous. He can reach so very deep and it moves with such precision, it makes you cum embarrassingly fast.
-That is if he allows you to cum in the first place. He's a big fan of edging, which shouldn't be a surprise. He likes to get you so close, then deny you of your pleasure. Your whining and grumbling is the cutest thing on all of earthbread, don't you know? He can't help but edge you when you're so damn cute every time.
-Your pleasure is in his hands, and it requires such relinquishing of power and trust. In a weird way it makes him feel warm and fuzzy inside, especially when you thank him over and over once he finally allows you to come undone after hours of teasing.
-Speaking of, he is a big fan of being praised for the work he does on you. Your moans and pleas are reward enough, but if you mumble out about how good you feel, how much you love him, how amazing he is he'll become drunk on your praise. Chasing after it with fervor, meaning he's going down on you with so much more excitement somehow.
-He's into blood (jam?) play. He likes leaving physical reminders of your relationship all over your body (yes, even ur vag/dick if you let him). With how sharp his teeth are, it's impossible for you not to bleed when he does so, and he does really like the sight of your jam. It's so pretty and so different from his own, another reminder of how different you are, and how much you trust him. (He'll lick it up and purr at the taste.)
-Bruises are also littered about your dough, his grip on you is tight, like you might slip away from him. The treatment is rough and harsh, but it feels so nice to be manhandled by him. The bruises are just nice little reminders of who you belong to. (He gets all proud when other cookies worry about them, like he's done something worthy of praise).
-He likes watching, he's very much a voyeur. Occasionally requests that you pleasure yourself for him so he can watch you struggle to get off, and he'll only help you out when you're near tears begging him.
-He prefers coming across you by himself, without having to request it. Or just feeling waves of pleasure through your bite. He'll watch you quietly fuck yourself without letting you know he's there. (Though, you most certainly can feel his eyes on you, that's what makes it so fun right?) Sometimes he'll join you after, and other and times he'll leave you be, it's 50/50 either way and regardless you still end up happy.
-If anyone else walks in on you when you're alone, he's very unpleasant. Accident or not they'll learn to be more aware of their surroundings next time.
-That doesn't mean he's against being watched though. Actually, he finds the idea of someone else seeing how well he treats you enticing (especially if it's someone like Pure Vanilla hehe). If you are together and someone walks in (or spots you in public), he won't stop. Instead, he'll lock eyes with them and smile big and wide, showing off his favorite little dolly for them.
-He's just so proud of you, and you're so very pretty beneath him, the whole world should get to see how you fall apart for him. He'll even make you look at them just to see how you fluster.
-If the offender tries to do anything other than watch, though, well... I really hope they didn't want to live for much longer. He's very much not a sharer, at all. The idea of anyone even thinking they could touch you and make you feel good both makes him laugh and want to tear them apart at once.
-He's very much into roleplaying and can get really into it. To the point, it loses the sexiness and is just the two of you playing around, which can be a bummer but is usually really fun. He likes things that lean into power dynamics but explicitly avoids god/king and worshipper/subject. A little too close to home for him, and would honestly be too boring and basic for him.
-He loves it when you dress up for him in pretty little outfits, be it lingerie or something more cutesy, he adores it regardless. Going out of your way to pretty up for him is a huge turn-on. He also loves it when you let him dress you up how he likes. Regardless of what you're wearing, it's not coming off the whole night. It will get ruined and he won't apologize for it. Besides, he can just replace it, right?
-Sex is more fun for him, but he can be intimate when he wants to be. Usually, when you're in control, he is at his most gentle. Yes, he's a brat when he bottoms and he'll fight you tooth and nail, but once you get him to submit he's the softest and sweetest you've ever seen him.
-He looks at you like you're the god, wide eyes taking in everything you do with such admiration it might make you crumble on the spot.
-He's much quieter, treating it less like a spectacle. Moans soft and squeaky, like he's not used to using his voice in such a way. He clings to you like a vice at each little movement, almost afraid you might disappear if he lets you go.
-Oh, and he praises you so much. 'So good', 'Thank you', 'You're perfect', and 'I love you' all tumble from him with such genuine gratitude.
-Being allowed to let his guard down and have you take control is cathartic for him, which is why it's so uncommon to have it happen. It's why he fights you for control so hard because this is an intimacy he isn't used to. It is hard for him to allow you to see him so weak, but you never use it against him. You're so very sweet and loving, and it makes him melt like butter in your grasp.
-If you have the bite I mentioned earlier, it only makes things so much more intense. Both of you can feel the raw emotion connecting the two of you, making the pleasure heighten further.
-In fact, when he gives you the bite it's the first time he allows you to top him. To connect you to him makes him very vulnerable, so he would naturally have to be in a vulnerable state already when he does so.
-It's unlike any of his other bites, it's far more painful when he initially bites down, but when his magic flows through it your body feels light and airy. The pleasurable feeling wrapping itself around your spine, and you feel what he's feeling. All that adoration pours into your being at once, and it's overwhelming to really feel how much he loves you.
#bunni's treats š§#x reader#shadow milk crk#crk#cr kingdom#cookie run kingdom#shadow milk cookie#shadow milk cookie x reader#shadow milk x reader#shadow milk cookie crk#put me down bro
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Starlight - Blurr and Swerve
Ooooohhh it was a long project !
It all started with my will to make a playlist for every pairing/group of this AU i found/hj. Starlight was an epiphany for me, because i could find a meaning for ALL THE LYRICS with Blurr and Swerve.
This Video is a lot of love for the ship AND certainly for YOUR A.U. Keferon, and your brain, and your style, and Tapa.....
All of these hearts and love are presently tapped together with my non existent animation skills (i just make comics lmao...some of my dearly beloved friends teached me how to edit. And its ugly)
*slap the animation* look how much hyperfixation this bad boy can fit in !!
Iāll credit basically all the people who send asks and arts about the gay bartenders, because I took references and ideas of a lot of them :))
Like the shockwave part or at the end, where we see the ārealā (?) Swerve.
Iāll credit @keferon because thatās his AU hehe but also @somerandomcockroach who fed me with their incredible artstyle, itās so incredible the job you guys do, Iām amazedā¦.!
Some cuts I like behind this one !
This scene is based of the āI see you Jakeā scene from Avatar (movie with the Naavis) because itās kind of them for me. Blurr is even Blue !
Shockwave. Make a short appearance but I love his character. And I love drawing him. He is terrifying.
And finally swerveā¦..Ah swerveā¦ā¦I loved drawing his bedroom hehe. I never draw Background !
Im stupid because what do you mean I wanna try animation and go straight for the 3:00 minute song ???
And I learned how to make the characters slide like PowerPoint half way HAHA
I donāt care, I loved doing that ā¤ļø
#tf mecha universe#transformers#maccadam#tf mecha au#fullmetal bartenders#swerve x blurr#swerve Blurr#keferon#animatic#animation#perhaps#I have no idea#I will repeat it but :#I only draw comics usually lmao#I hope you guys will like itā¦ā¦becauseā¦ā¦.urgh i did this with all of my love#and I am proud I finished it.#what a sentimental human I am X)#THANK YOU AGAIN KEFERON#FOR THE AU#YOU AWAKENED SOMETHING IN ME#YOU HAVE NO IDEA#All the things I wouldnāt have did if I never came across your TMNT tumblr#:) <3#kudos on you#<- Im so freakin sentimental
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