#there is a time to forgive and a time to argue

[bezierballad]

I’m surprised at how many people are still calling Ragatha “fake” even after Episode 5’s release. When I once posted about that moment where she apologized to Gangle about what she said to her in Ep 5 when she was on the stupid sauce, there were a good bit of comments saying “she’s not being sincere/she’s being fake/Gangle probably doesn’t fully buy her apology/etc.”

And yeah, I get it: it’s left up in the air whether or not Gangle truly forgives Ragatha after she apologized (implicitly many, many times, judging by the way she says, “again, I am still so sorry about that”) though I’d argue that the small smile Gangle has after the interaction plus her later thanking Ragatha for her advice during the Softball segment seems to indicate that she doesn’t harbor that much of a grudge towards her.

Again, what irks me personally is how people are calling Ragatha “fake,” and that “she masks how she truly feels” like she’s secretly a bitch in disguise and only thinks negatively about those around her. I’m gonna be blunt and say that’s plain fucking dumb and far from what Ragatha is.

“Masking” is putting on a facade. It’s concealing or suppressing who you truly are underneath. It’s not just hiding how you truly feel about something or someone else, it’s pretending to be someone you’re not.

Remember Gangle in the majority of Episode 4? That’s masking. We know Gangle for being timid, shy, and non-confrontational (unlike Ragatha who’s obviously not afraid to call out Jax on his bullshit) but when she puts on the comedy mask that Zooble gives her, her personality takes a 180 and she becomes more assertive, more hyperactive, and even a control freak at times. When that mask “breaks” (or when she takes it off during her conversation with Pomni), she reveals her true self.

Ragatha doesn’t “mask.” She “bottles.”

She bottles up her negative feelings (even when others take her for granted) because she genuinely wants other people to like her.

Sure, she puts on a “happy face” and hides any negative thoughts and feelings behind those cheerful doll eyes and stitched-up smile, but she’s not trying to be an entirely different person.

I know many people say these methods are still basically the same, but I feel like their personal life experiences also somewhat factor into this.

Gangle had a passion for drawing, and dreamed of being a webcomic artist and launching a manga-inspired webcomic, so she enrolled in a community college for graphic design, which she later drops out of for unspecified reasons. Then for the rest of her life, she was stuck working in a fast food place, having basically given up on her dreams at that point. When she’s dumped back into a familiar environment in Episode 4, she takes on the role of the “hyperactive control freak manager” leaving no room for the timid wannabe mangaka. This is how she presumably coped with her dreams being thrown away.

Ragatha grew up in a wealthy family that had a large rural property, and had a rather troubled relationship with her mother, and many of their interactions involved her “yelling, berating, and guilt-tripping.”

While it’s not as big of a lore dump as we got with Gangle in the previous episode, we can go off the assumption that her behavior stemmed from practically walking on eggshells whenever she interacted with her mother (speaking as someone who’s gone through very similar experiences) being as kind and nice as possible to avoid possibly upsetting other people. Even when others don’t treat her the best (such as Pomni attempting to ditch her twice) she brushes it off and says “oh don’t worry about that, it’s fine.”

When characters in-universe say that it’s hard to tell how genuine Ragatha is, they refer to how she pretends to not be emotionally hurting, not how she’s “pretending to be nice.”

Everyone often points fingers at the scene where she called Gangle annoying while on the stupid sauce.

You know what else she did on the stupid sauce? 

She says to Jax of all people, “I like, hate you… but I don’t want you to hate me. Is that weird?”

If she was truly a mean person only pretending to be nice and the stupid sauce was her being her “true self”, why would she also say that? I feel like people just straight up ignore that one line of dialogue in favor of painting Ragatha as a bitch in doll’s clothing, because it always circles back to what she said to Gangle.

Anyway Idk how to end off this post so uh 

#RagathaDefenseSquad

[jellybellygirly]

heartbroken!choso x reader

cw: mdni, smut, angst, kinda yandere?choso, sub!choso (boys pathetic for u oml), jealousy, oral(fem receiving), p in v, heartbreak, dacryphilia? and yearningggg

Summary: You're fed up with Choso's behavior and it leads to a pathetic Choso willing to do anything to get you back, and an even more desperate reconciling

Notes: Y'all this is my first fic!! I'm totes open to polite constructive criticism so hit me up!!

Word Count: 2.9k

He's not sure if your phone was filled with notifications or if you had blocked him and weren't aware of his desperate attempts to get in contact with you. Either way, he feels helpless.

Choso has been rotting away on his couch from the moment he opened his eyes, needing to get out of his tear soaked bed. It smelled like you, your perfume lingering on the pillows like they were taunting him. His soft sheets stopped bringing him comfort when he awoke to a suddenly empty feeling without you tangled in his sheets. Now, all he wanted was for you to steal his blankets when he was exhausted, because then at least he would have the comfort of you.

Discarding his phone somewhere to his side, Choso heaves a sigh that turns into a choked sob. The feeling like a ball of grief in his throat, stuck, not able to be swallowed down.

It seemed almost ridiculous. Choso's heart was broken, no, shattered and it wasn't like you were gone forever. Just yesterday you ended your relationship with Choso, mentioning a lack of communication and something about feeling trapped. Your words hit him hard, piercing his heart with guilt.

You're his first everything, and he's still figuring out how to navigate a romantic relationship, but he can't deny your reasoning. He could be cryptic and needy, and as hard as he tries to understand that you can't read his mind, his jealousy has always been at the forefront of his personality since you started dating.

Choso mulled over your words for the past 24 hours and came to accept that you deserve better. That he could be better, and will be.

If you didn't block his number then your voicemail should be full of scatterbrained explanations and begging for forgiveness. Choso knows he sounds pathetic- god, he is pathetic, but he would do anything for another chance at a life with you. Another chance to have you in his arms, exploring your body before a deep and restful nap, cuddled close but still wanting to be infinitely closer.

Choso's mind feels like a movie of all the times jealousy got the best of him, only serving to sending him reeling with regret. There were the aggressive moments, like when he punched a drunk innocent man in the bar for offering to buy you a drink, or the time he argued with a man in the grocery line for making a pass at you (the guy gave you his place in line). And there was the simple possessive moments where he didn't want you going out without him. He wouldn't even let you stay at his brother Yuji's house party because he felt like knew that everyone was looking at you.

It hit him like a truck when you pointed out his controlling qualities on that night just a week ago. Choso’s tried to be better following your little confrontation, never wanting to make you feel uncomfortable, but you seemed to have enough last night when you two butted heads for, apparently, the last time.

Choso was preparing dinner when you walked out of his apartment bedroom with your makeup done and hair up, seemingly ready to go out. There was no denying you looked stunning, likely done up to go for a night out with your friends. Choso had to restrain himself from taking your hand and leading you back into the bedroom, but simultaneously holding back from letting go of petty comments in effort to get you to stay. Nonetheless, Choso was looking forward to surprising you with a night in... and you took it as him wanting to keep you from going out, spurring the first real heated argument of your relationship. He froze up as you grabbed your overnight bag and forced out an "It's over."

Now he's standing in front of his coffee maker, the filling mug a painful reminder of slow morning afters and soft kisses as the sun broke up the dark of the room through the curtains.

Darting a glance towards the time illuminating from the clock on his oven- holy shit, it's nearly 4pm and he's just starting to slug around after a night of minimal sleep and sobs racking his body so hard his neighbors likely heard.

He tried calling you immediately and his texts sounded just as desperate as he was, but to no avail.

*ding*

Fuck. The doorbell? How could he possibly answer the door right now. But in a split second, that annoyance became hope that it was you coming back to him. Choso sat his mug down so quickly, coffee spilled on the counter around it while he pathetically rushed to the door. He gripped the handle and took a deep breath, opening the door to find... a box. A fucking delivery sitting on the doormat you helped pick out when he finally moved into his own apartment.

Choso's eyes burned with more tears threatening to spill down his cheeks. All he wanted was a second chance. One more try. He would get it right this time. The black haired man picked up the package and set it just inside, cursing the limits of time for not allowing him just one re-do. A way to go back in time and prevent your leaving.

Yet, even in his pain he knows you can't be gone forever. He will find a way to get you back. Maybe find a way to a more stable income and spoil you with whatever you'd like. He'd invest in therapy and become the partner you wished he was-  "Hey, Cho..."

The honey of your voice mixed with uncertainty interrupts his train of thought like dagger. Though the hurt is good, because after all, you're here.

You could tell he was having a rough time dealing with the breakup. By the look of it, he was fairing worse than you.

You were nervous to come, arriving at his open door to see a disheveled Choso facing away from you. Even now his back feels welcoming, especially after a night of reminiscing on the feeling of it when you hug or when you leave pink scratches down its rough skin. Choso's hair is thrown up in an extremely messy bun falling low behind his head, strands spilling out and as he whips his head around to face you, framing his features beautifully.

His eyes look tired and puffy, nose red and he's still wearing the sweatpants from yesterday, hanging low on his hips with a deep green baggy t-shirt slouching on his shoulders. It feels like his dark earth eyes are made to make you regret your actions. The yearning in his gaze almost making you forget why you came in the first place. God knows they've already made you forget why you left.

"Cho..." you start, as Choso slowly walks toward you with a look you'd never seen tug at his brows. He's looking at you like he can't believe you're real.

Words leave you as the equally confused and relieved man gets closer and reaches up to brush his fingers across your cheek, as if to check that he isn't dreaming. He towers over you, eyes searching yours, ready to get lost again. You can barely find the will in you to break eye contact but you manage to look down just slightly, clearing your throat.

Just as soon as Choso was there, he was gone. His touch missing but his presence still right in front of you. You could tell he was longing for something more than silence, and so were you. Here goes nothing...

"I... I'm sorry Choso," You look at your feet, opening your mouth to explain yourself when you hear a whimper escape your now ex. Looking up, you see just how broken the man in front of you is. Wet lines flowing down his cheeks as he cuts you off.

"Fuck, no baby, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel trapped," Choso choked out, "I'll do anything to make it better. Just tell me what I need to do. I promise..." and his voice broke. Once again Choso was reduced to a mess, only for you. "I promise I can fix this- us."

You swallowed at the apologies Choso was sobbing, choking on every other word and gasping for air like it was scarce.

"I promise, baby. P-please, just- mph!" It's so familiar, your lips on his. Like it was always meant to be that way, as cliche as it sounds. You gently guide his face to yours, falling back to flat feet after trying to make yourself taller to touch your lips to his. You can taste the salt from his tears as your own start to fall.

It takes a moment for Choso to register what's happening, but once he does he wastes no time sliding one of his hands up to cup your face while the other pulls the small of your back into him. You can feel the passion radiate from where you connect as he asks for entrance into your mouth, desperate kisses leading to sloppy tongue as if he can't get enough of you. As if he's afraid you'll vanish.

You don't push him to slow down, but instead tangle your hand in his hair as the other wraps around to feel the strong back you'd missed so much. Choso moans into your mouth at the feeling of your soothing hand in his hair, another cry in his chest, but this time a thankful cry. Because you did come back. Because he will be all you need this time.

He would never make the mistake of hurting you again. Choso makes this pact with himself as he kisses a line from your mouth down to your neck, sucking while savoring the noises you make. Relishing in the tugs on his scalp whenever he nips and bites marks into your soft skin.

You can feel Choso's tears hit your shoulder and he tucks his face in  the crook of your neck in an attempt to hide it. Settling to cry in a tight hug around your waist as your hands come to pat his head and back from around his arms. Your own cries silently spilling out as you pull him as tight as possible around his neck.

You can hear Choso mumble something into your skin, and you pull back to take his face in your hands, heart breaking at the sight of him, whispering his name in question.

"I- I don't want to be apart anymore. Please come back... please baby," he's begging, but you don't need to hear it. You already hoped he would take you back when you arrived. "You have *hic* no idea how much I need you in my life..."

"Baby you don't need to-" but he's already getting on his knees.

"I'll be whatever you need me to be, do whatever you *hic* need me to do. I'll make all of my mistakes b-better, just... please..."

Choso's looking up at you with his deep earth eyes, like he needs you with his whole being. You stroke his hair and try to not take the sight in the wrong context, failing but not acting on your desire, settling for a slow and happy afternoon.

However, it seems your boyfriend? is taking a similar train of thought as he pulls the hair tie out of his hair and tentatively puts his hands behind your legs. He drags them up slowly, testing the waters until he is sure you're ok with their continued path, gripping your ass and pulling you in toward him.

Choso's eyes are at level with your pussy, and he can't contain a groan as he brings his hands to the front of you to undo your jeans, silently begging for permission with his gaze as you nod at him, letting him drag the fabric down and off of your body.

It's a breath of relief when he sees your pretty panties covering your his pussy, and he puts his head in-between your thighs to breathe in the scent of you. The sweet smell of the pussy he's become addicted to, and learned he can't live without.

You lean against the closed door behind you and tilt your head back as Choso licks a stripe over the wet patch on your panties. Gripping his hair as he makes out with your clothes pussy, you both whining like it's been years when in reality, the short break truly did feel like it.

Just as you start to reach the edge you've been craving, a starved Choso finds the will to break away and weakly look up at you, just to pull down your underwear by the pretty bow with his teeth. As you step out of them he rises back to his feet and carries you with ease back to the bedroom, where he knows you belong.

The half curse lays you down gently on his bed, crawling in-between your legs and shortly after, teasingly lifts his shirt over his head, discarding it on the floor below. Admiring the look of your lover's body and need for you as he leans down to the bare space between your thighs, you can't believe you somehow walked away from the one man that would do anything for you.

"Never leave... please? I need you..." he rasps, licking a thick stripe across your clit, "...this is where we belong, ok?" Choso gently grabs your thighs and kneads as a way to keep them open as he eats like a man starved.

"F-fuck Cho, I promise..." you mewl, pushing his head into your pussy harder, the sounds of Choso enjoying himself filling the air. Choso is messy, not caring if he's sloppy or needy, just wanting as much of you as possible. "Cho- oh, oh my god-!"

Choso's grinding into the bed like a dog in heat, desperately humping in an attempt to find some sort of release. It's been a day, but a day was too much. He can never lose you again. His tongue is swiping frantically across your folds and in and out of your opening that's begging for something more. One of your hands has pushed your shirt above your breasts, playing with your tits through your bra as you throw your head back in pleasure.

"Ah- Cho I'm-" you cry out, making eye contact with the pathetic man between your legs, coming to a climax as he laps up all you give him like it's his last meal. Moaning into your pussy and gripping your thighs so hard you wouldn't be surprised to see bruises tomorrow.

Even as you're coming down from your high, Choso is fixing his mess by licking you clean, then leaving an open mouthed kiss on your lips. You can taste yourself on his tongue, but it's not as distracting as the bulge pressing into your leg as he languidly grinds onto you.

Reaching down to find the desperate mans waistband, you fumble his sweatpants down with his help, immediately resuming your heated kiss as his cock springs free, feeling heavy against your body. You pull away, more like pushing him away for a moment, to take off your shirt and throw it across the room. Choso follows by unclipping your bra from behind your back, perfected from all of the practice he's gained with you, fingertips brushing down your body.

"Mm, baby... missed this" Choso hums, mesmerized, as your bra falls below your chest, exposing your perked nipples and fading love bites. You can't help but chuckle, becoming a bit too self aware that just 24 hours earlier you were still together. But at this moment, nothing but each other matters.

It's corny, but the way Choso looks at you makes you weak. Knowing he would do anything to keep you or to simply make you happy. Knowing that he needs you. Knowing that you need him. Now fully aching, Choso buries his head into your neck, kissing and licking sensual bites, fully ready to make new love marks he'll admire later.

You're not going to lie and say you're not getting a bit impatient. Putting your hand on his chest and softly pushing him down gives him the hint. You flip your hair to one side and lean in for a kiss before straddling his hips and aligning where you need each other most.

Choso's eyes roll back as you start to sink down on his cock, a loud groan escaping his throat. Regard for the neighbors is out the window as you start to bounce, wet noises filling up the space. You clench at Choso's expression seemingly fucked out while you were just starting.

"Fuuuck baby, oh- fuck" Choso squeezes your ass with his large calloused hands, helping you lift and drop faster, chasing a mutual high. "You're so fucking tight, oh my god..." and as you gaze down at him your heart aches, his eyes squeezing shut to let another tear fall.

"Baby, never leave- never leave- fuck..." he's babbling now, thrusting up into you like he can't get enough, "I l-love you, baby. God-! So much..." Choso's gasping between each grind into his hips, choking over his words, wishing he could record your moans to play at will. He can feel you clenching harder and he's groaning through his teeth, eyes rolled back as you whine.

"Cho-! Ch, I'm gonna cum- I'm gonna-"

"Mmh- fu-uck baby cum with me, please-!" He fucks up into you as you slam down on him, crying out as you reach your climax together. Your pulsing pussy squeezing tears from his eyes and cock while you ride out your high.  He's whimpering from the slight overstimulation when Choso tugs you down into him. Wrapping his arms around you he whispers "I love you's" into your hair, and you both know this is home.

[gothicpaperback]

THE WAY HE CARES | PART THREE

<<< PART TWO | PART FOUR: COMING SOON >>>

wc: 2,1k | rating: 18+ for eventual smut | Joel Miller x You | Enemy Pregnancy

summary: Joel Miller has been my pain-in-the-ass neighbour for years. we argue more than we speak and when we do speak, it's usually through gritted teeth. but when my doctor tells me my fertility’s running out of time, panic sets in. I want a baby and I don’t have the luxury of waiting around for Mr. Right. Joel's a damn good father to his daughter, Sarah. that much, I can’t deny. so one night, fuelled by nerves and just the right amount of wine, I ask him the unthinkable: get me pregnant. no strings.no romance. just biology. i never planned on falling for him. but nothing about Joel Miller ever goes according to plan.

while the story is first person narrative, the OC female character is YOU. she is not named and barely physically described aside from being able bodied and having hair long enough to grab.

tags/warnings: neighbours, enemies to lovers, comedy, smut, sexual tension, mentions of fertility and reproductive issues, mentions of drugs and alcohol. i will add more tags as they become relevant.

taglist: @himboelover | @harrypotteranna23-blog | @isabella-rose-trastamara | @ro4nix | @sunndroppp | @harriedandharassed

THE WAY HE CARES | PART THREE

I woke up with my cheek pressed against Joel’s shoulder and a dull, jack hammering throb behind my eyes. The house was too bright, the air too stale, and I could taste bad beer, whiskey and regret on my tongue.

Joel stirred beside me, groaning low in his throat.

We sat up at the same time, groaning in stereo, both of us squinting like hungover goblins in a cave.

“God,” I muttered, rubbing my eyes. “Did we drink my entire liquor cabinet?"

I blinked down at the coffee table. There, half-slid under an empty bottle, was the notepad we’d used last night. I pulled it toward me, hoping for a tidy list of logical, emotionless ground rules.

They started out like that, but quickly devolved the sloppy handwriting and barely legible notes. 

Number twelve: No weird eye contact Number nineteen: Joel is banned from singing lullabies. Number thirty: Must never tell the kid Joel thinks birds are government drones

I stared at it. Then held it up, deadpan. “You got sentimental.”

Joel squinted at it, then snorted. “That was you. You started writing names after your fourth beer.”

“Lies. You said the name Joel Jr was great because we can call him JJ.’”

“Yeah, and I stand by it,” he said, then scrubbed a hand over his face. “But you also said, and I quote, ‘He’s going to be the most emotionally stable Capricorn in the Western Hemisphere.’”

I winced. “I hate me.”

He let out a dry laugh, then leaned back against the couch with a long sigh.

“Anyway,” I said, voice turning more pointed as I dropped the notepad back on the table, “none of it matters. You don’t get a say in anything, remember? That was the agreement.”

Joel’s head turned slowly toward me. His jaw tensed.

“I know that,” he said, clipped. “You were the one who started jotting down nursery colours like we were designing a joint Pinterest board.”

“Well, maybe if you hadn’t kept saying, ‘You know what this kid needs?’ like you were pitching a product-”

“Oh, forgive me for trying to make conversation while donating my future genetics.”

“Donating? You made it sound like I won a sweepstakes.”

“I mean, clearly I was drunk enough to forget you’re still impossible.”

“Right back at you, Joel.”

We glared at each other. The warm fuzzy truce from last night had vanished like beer foam, replaced by familiar, petty tension that somehow felt even worse with a hangover.

Then Joel's phone buzzed with a text from Joel’s daughter’s contact name: SARAH.

> Mom’s dropping me off in an hour. Can we get donuts after??

Joel groaned again, this time with feeling. “Sarah’s coming back this morning. She cannot see me doing the walk of shame out of your house.”

"Not to mention that bitch Phelps across the street." 

I stood up, already formulating a plan that absolutely shouldn’t have made as much sense as it did. 

"We need to get you out without anyone seeing.”

He narrowed his eyes. “What kind of plan are we talking about here?”

Ten minutes later, Joel stood in my kitchen wearing a hoodie so tight on him it barely reached his wrists, a baseball cap pulled low, and sunglasses that belonged to my last regrettable ex. He was also wearing some of my hair extensions shoved under the cap, trailing around his stubbled cheeks. 

“This is your plan?” he asked, deadpan.

“You need to look like some loser I'd date. Dressed like that no one is gonna think you're Joel Miller, helpful

"No, they’re gonna think, drug dealer, let's call the cops." 

"So walk fast." 

Joel muttered something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like "fuckin' nutjob."

I peeked through the blinds. Across the street, his porch was still empty. No sign of Sarah or her mom’s car yet, but that didn’t mean the coast was clear.

“Okay,” I said. “You go down the side yard, cut behind the Petersons’ hedges, and take the long route around the back of the Culvers’ place. Then you cross diagonally to your garage from the alley side.”

“This is not a bank heist, it’s suburban espionage,” he grumbled, but he adjusted the cap on his head and followed me out the side door anyway.

We crept along the fence line like two criminals breaking out of a Hobby Lobby. At one point, Joel tripped over a lawn gnome and I had to clamp a hand over his mouth to keep him from swearing loud enough for the birds to file a noise complaint.

As we passed behind the Petersons’ rose bushes, we both froze. Mr. Peterson was in the driveway, adjusting his sprinkler.

I hissed, “Act natural.”

Joel straightened his spine as I practically shouted. "Thanks for the delivery GrubHub guy. Your tip has been added!" 

Mr. Peterson frowned over at us. 

“Oh hi, Mr Peterson,” I shouted, yanking Joel by the arm and speed-walking toward the Culvers’ back fence. "Just thanking the Food delivery guy!" 

Mr. Peterson just nodded incredulously before going back to fixing his sprinkler. 

“This is humiliating,” Joel muttered.

“You’re welcome.”

Joel was sweating and glaring, but we were unseen. He darted down the alley, across to his backyard.

I was about to leave when Sarah's mom pulled up. 

"Shit." 

I watched the teen give her mom a kiss before grabbing her backpack. 

"See you next weekend, mom!"

"Bye honey!"

Joel was still halfway through his backyard when her mom's car took off. I was standing on the sidewalk pretending to check my mail. 

I panicked, knowing that if Sarah turned around right this second she would see her dad creeping through the hedges like a demented pervert. 

"Sarah!" I screeched. 

When he heard my scream, Joel tugged the hat, hair and glasses from his head. His real hair was a mess and he looked like he’d aged five years in ten minutes.

Sarah was peering at me from across the street. "Yeah?"

"Uh, come here a second." 

Sarah looked a bit confused but she did so, shooting me a smile. "Good morning."

I watched Joel from the corner of my eyes, smiling at Sarah. He was inching towards his side door. 

"I just wanted to say, Sarah, that I think you are a great kid." 

Sarah beamed up at me, all bright teeth and shiny eyes. "Thank you ma'am."

"Oh please, call me by my name," I said distractedly, my eyes on Sarah but my focus on Joel. 

"Uh, did you need anything?" Sarah asked after an uncomfortable moment of silence. 

Joel was so close. Just a few seconds more. I panicked. 

"I wanted to have you over for a cookout. This week. My place. Do you like mushroom burgers?" 

"Uh, yeah, I guess so," Sarah said slowly. 

Joel was at the side door now. He gave me one last look, equal parts annoyed and begrudgingly impressed before he slipped inside. 

"Anyway, something to think about," I said far too loudly. "Bye Sarah! Lovely to see you!" 

I smiled hard, turned on my heel, and marched back to my house with Sarah waving after me. 

Disaster averted.

Ten minutes and two huge glasses of orange juice later, an alert popped up on my phone. 

> Guess our drunk selves wanted us to be in contact

A blurry selfie was saved under his name in my contact list.

Joel 'Babydaddy' Miller. 

Jesus. 

>At least they did us one solid. 

> Considering your devious little plan today I'm surprised we didn't do something worse

I watched the dots bounce as he formulated his response, biting my thumb nail and grinning at the screen.

>You’re terrifying when you’re organized.  >And you’re welcome for your spotless suburban reputation.

I imagined I could hear his chuckle across the street. His smile and perfect teeth. 

> Sarah mentioned something about a cookout this week?  > Oh right. I panicked. Sorry.  >It's fine. I'll make up an excuse. 

For some reason I felt a little deflated at the response but I couldn't pinpoint why. All I knew was that I needed this conversation to end. 

> I want my hoodie back by the way. Have a good week. 

And just like that, we were back to whatever the hell this was, two enemies playing house in the dumbest possible way.

[yushi-ni]

ot6 how they act in an argument please🙏🏽😋

ෆ NCT WISH ෆ 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖺𝗋𝗀𝗎𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗌

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱ masterlist

summary; NCT WISH and arguments ꨄ how they act in arguments - small fights as your bf.

warnings; mentions of things that could be viewed as rude - little toxicity. this is purely for entertainment purposes so don’t take it too serious!!!

notes; hi anon!!! 🧚🏻🧚🏻🧚🏻 here’s this hahahaha!!! hope you like this one, i didn’t proofread so if sentences seem a little out of place or vague.. i’m sorry!!! i tried but sometimes it just doesn’t work out the way i want it to so please bare with me hahahaha enjoy it!!!!

──୨ৎ────────୨ৎ────────୨ৎ──

oh sion

ᯓ ok sion is a petty one ngl. depending on the seriousness of the situation. he will have different reactions. couples fight, so you two have your own issues too every now and then. most of the time it’s just small fights that don’t really get to a point of conflict. but sometimes… mr oh sion has this little attitude that makes it a little harder to forgive and forget. ngl he has this little ego problem that can make him look super arrogant. not one to give in or accept your opinion because it’s not necessarily the truth just because you (you) feel this way.

ᯓ sometimes there’s these little moments when one reacts out of frustration, it’s a human emotion so it’s not always in our control. sion definitely has a lot of built up emotions - frustration, not necessarily towards you but also work related. so at times this results in his response being so strong even though the matter itself was not a big issue to begin with. sometimes you can understand, you can see the bigger picture of the situation and just let it slide. you know he doesn’t mean it as a personal attack towards you. but other days, you’re more heated about a certain thing so his reaction triggered the wrong emotion in you as well. then it’s fire against fire and both of you are stubborn, so no one is going to give in

ᯓ sion won’t always see when he’s in the wrong. he’s very understanding when you speak your mind but when it’s directly towards him or something involving him he has a hard time getting past his own thoughts. and he’ll let you know too. he’s not a mean person, not at all, he’s just very blunt and selfish with certain things. sometimes his words leave his mouth before his mind can comprehend and think about a proper response. his facial expressions are also very strong, raised eyebrows, narrowing his eyes, tilting his head etc etc. he’s easily ‘offended’ so goes straight into self defence. sometimes he will just stare at you and not even say anything, just a chuckle out of disbelief. won’t ever intentionally hurt you so when it gets a little too heated - serious he will give you your space, just like you do to him and when he calmed down or when he has had some time to think about it he’ll come find you and ‘try’ to talk about it.

maeda riku

ᯓ riku is a very kind and warm person. he’s brought up in a loving house and is super close with his sister and mother. out of all wishies he might be the most understanding when it comes to women and their ‘issues’. fights don’t really happen, yes you have moments of mutual frustration or one sided as well, but it never goes as far as a fight. whenever there’s something that bothers him, he’ll come to you. sometimes he’ll need a little time to get his own thoughts clear and he might need a little push in the back from sion but he will always try and communicate with you. he doesn’t want to argue or be upset with you

ᯓ if you’re upset with him, for whatever reason, his first reaction might be to deny mostly out of self defence. not in a; ‘no wtf are you on about’ but he needs a little moment to let it sink in yk what i mean?? because as understanding as he is, he’s not perfect or a robot. he has his own feelings so if you confront him with something he needs your words to reach his mind before he can actually talk to you about it. sometimes this might make him look uninterested or as if he’s not taking you seriously but he’s really just thinking and trying to make sure he understands what you’re telling him.

ᯓ he’ll never leave the house or part ways with you if you’re not on one line. he will give you all the space you need…; from the other side of the wall… in the same apartment!!!! no matter if you were in the wrong or if it was his fault; most of the time it’s him coming to you to apologise and make up again. he just can’t stand the thought of being mad or upset with someone, especially not with you. ngl he’s a very emotional guy so it’s not unlikely that some tears flow down his face

tokuno yushi

ᯓ mmmh yushi can lowkey be a little pain in the ass when it comes to arguments. it’s not like he enjoys fighting with you, not at all but he’s not always the cute - sweet guy (usually he is ok!!!) same with sion it depends on the situation and the actual cause of the problem but if it’s something coming from his own frustration, so something that you might have done or said, he will not hold back. he’s not straight up mean, but his words can be harsh and direct.. which is a huge contrast to his usual kind personality. he’s the type of person to react out of anger and emotions, his frustration getting the best of him. picture dramatic hands brushing through his hair, deep sighs, stone cold face etc etc

ᯓ if there’s a situation where you confront him about something his face will show his reaction before any words leave his mouth. if it’s just something small, he can let it slide but if he feels ‘uncomfortable’ or attacked he won’t really be able to see the bigger picture but in that moment his first instinct is to defend himself and even turn the tables back on you. i think out of all of them he has the hardest time with confrontation. but that’s just in the moment itself. he is blunt and too direct with his words so it comes out a lot harsher than he initially wants.

ᯓ when the heat of the ‘conflict’ is over and he had some time to think about what happened, he will definitely come to terms with the fact that he might have ‘overreacted’. if he thinks he was at fault, he will try to talk to you and make up. he doesn’t like fighting with you because who likes fighting with someone they love? but he needs some time to calm down again. and so do you, if after some time you feel like you could have approached it better, you will say sorry and tell him how you feel. fights won’t linger for long because you don’t want to be mad at each other, you don’t want to go to bed upset and avoid the other out of pettiness. you just need to hear each other out and peace will come again

kim jaehee

ᯓ he’s honestly very mature. very understanding and a good listener when it comes to things like this. but (!) even prince jaehee can get a little hot headed sometimes.. but to just go with the first part first; he doesn’t like arguments and will do everything in his power to avoid getting in fights with you. if something is bothering you, you are always free to talk to him and voice out your thoughts. he will listen and hear you out and will speak his own mind too. 9/10 times arguments can be avoided with simple communication and mutual respect!!! same goes with the times jaehee wants to point out something that you did. you’ll listen to what he has to say and then talk about it together so both of you can understand the other’s point of view

ᯓ but there’s these rare occasions where jaehee feels stronger emotions that are harder to control. he doesn’t get jealous easily but one of the things that can bother him so much is how (in his words and eyes) you can be so obnoxious to other people’s behaviour and intentions. you’re just too kind and might be a little bit of a people pleaser and that drives him insane sometimes. it comes from a good place in his heart, he doesn’t want people to take advantage of you and your kindness but he can get very mad when you don’t seem to even realise. so the only times fights with jaehee can get more serious is when it’s about you and his protectiveness.

ᯓ whenever those situations do occur, you just need a little moment to think. be alone and let your mind wander about the things that have been said. you know his love for you goes beyond anything so you also know he only wants the best for you. he will give you the space you need but it won’t take long before he comes into your room to talk about it. this time in a calm and peaceful manner, you both had the needed time and space and now you can make up and go back to normal. because neither of you like to see the other upset ofc

hiroshe ryo

ᯓ buckle up girl now our little ryo here definitely knows what he is right and wrong (in his eyes) he is not the type to get mad mad, he won’t raise his voice in an angry way or whatever but he is SO whiny. not in a ‘awww what a cutie’ way (he whines in a cute way too but obviously not whenever he’s frustrated or upset) no no no he will whine and complain about it over and over again. if something happens he will not hold back and immediately go into a whole rant. gets so defensive even tho there was no reason to. will voice out whatever is bothering him and answers his own questions in the same sentence. lowkey strays off of the whole issue itself as his mind just races

ᯓ big fights don’t happen often but sometimes you do get in a stupid yes or no battle and none of you want to let go of it first. he is young so he’s still ‘learning’ about the importance of communication and understanding. in the heat of the moment he can only focus on being in the right and it’s only after the situation dies down he is able to see the bigger picture. ryo can come across as a little bit of a gaslighter, not in a way that he gets toxic and mean (!!!) but he will unintentionally switch your words and make you feel like you’re in the wrong and it is your fault that you’re fighting right now

ᯓ just as quickly as that little head of his gets all worked up and bursts out, it’s also gone again. he’s very into the moment itself so he can easily brush it off again and go back to normal. as soon as the words are said it’s ok and he can just go on like nothing happened. sometimes that’s ok with you, if it was something unserious or just not worth getting upset about you can just let it be but sometimes it is not that easy to ignore and you can’t be all fun and happy since it lowkey hurt your feelings. in those moments you will silently approach your bf and try to voice out your thoughts. he might not even realise he upset you so he will definitely try to make it up to you and obviously apologises for making you feel bad.

fujinaga sakuya

ᯓ i don’t think sakuya is one to get bothered by something quickly. yes there might be things that you do that he doesn’t really understand or see the purpose of it but he’s more of a; ‘you do you’ type of guy. there’s no reason to fight, in his opinion, if you accept him and he accepts you then what more is there to do?? and even when there are things that can cause a little passage of words, it’s never serious enough that it will keep him up at night. as long as you talked about it, it’s all good.

ᯓ one thing saku does tho, whether that’s to you, ryo or sion, is that he is very quick with his response. it almost seems as if he has an answer ready at any given moment. you point out something and in an instant he fired back, not necessarily a bad thing but it can come across a little more rude than he intended to. he can get a little sulky tho, not one to be mad at you for stupid things but boi can he sulk. he can’t hide his feelings for you so you can always tell when he’s not feeling it. but if you ask him about it he won’t give you a clear answer. just some mumbling, pouty lips and all. he can’t stay (or wants) to feel upset with you so even if he gets in his feels for a little bit he will quickly find his way back to his senses and apologises for behaving a little bit out of place

ᯓ in general saku is very easy going so fights just don’t really happen, which is a good thing ofc. he also doesn’t see an issue with voicing out his discomfort towards you about things that happened or possible scenarios that could happen. so he might come across as a little blunt whenever he just blurts out what’s on his mind but you know it’s never with any bad intentions. so you can easily communicate and talk your way through the situation (10 points for bf saku!!!)

[perseephoneee]

┈ ⟡ crash out [a frank langdon fic]

˖ 𐦍 CHAPTER 1: SOMEONE SAYS 'I DO'

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After returning from rehab and looking to earn forgiveness for his mistakes, Frank makes his way back to the Pitt Trauma Medical Center, where he discovers he's been given a supervisor to oversee his progress.

a/n: finally returning to this after crashing out for the past three weeks. can you even crash out for three weeks? it doesn't matter...i did it anyway

beta'd by the beautiful @eurydiceauxenfers <3

“I’ll bet you $10 this isn’t going to work,” you said, watching as Langdon operated. The patient had been injured on a construction site, and you both were arguing over the best way to treat them. While part of you was well aware that he usually had smart ideas for how to handle these situations, you also knew he responded best to competition.

“Then you are going to be $10 short and feeling very stupid,” Langdon laughed, eyes focused on his work. He seemed a lot more joyful than he was a few weeks ago when you first met him. 

“Don’t be a douche.”

“Can’t,” he shrugged. “Because I just succeeded.”

You bit back a smile as he finished off his work, standing back and gesturing to the nurses to bandage the patient up. You left the room, knowing he’d meet you later, as he finished cleaning up. 

You’d had no idea what to expect when Robby asked you to be Frank’s supervisor. You had heard from the rumor mill that he tended to be arrogant, had a hard time not being in control, and was close with Robby. Oh, and the whole stealing drugs thing. But the man you saw on the first day seemed more desperate and sad than anything. Challenging him in his work was the closest you got to seeing that version you were told of before. 

You had also heard him referred to as ER Ken, which gave you a certain idea of what he was supposed to look like. You were not disappointed. 

He’s married, you thought to yourself, looking at the board in central. You heard his footsteps a second later. You could always tell it was him because the steps always seemed hurried, much like a puppy. He wore a grin.

“You owe me $10.”

You raised a brow at him. “How about I just get you a drink from the vending machine and we call it even.”

Langdon pretended to think about it, even though you knew he had already decided. “Deal.”

“Good. We have a sick child in six.”

Langdon pouted. “There’s an amputation in three.”

“I don’t care,” you snorted, watching as his expression fell. You enjoyed that aspect of being his supervisor, getting to make him do whatever case you wanted. He didn’t complain…much. 

He made sure to stay a few paces behind you as you approached the curtain, announcing yourself as you opened it. A little girl, seven years of age, sat on the bed with her knees to her chest and a rabbit in her arms. She was frowning as her parents sat in the chairs next to her. 

“Hi Chloe, I’m Dr. L/N and this is my colleague Dr. Langdon,” you smiled, closing the curtain behind you. “What seems to be the problem?”

“She says her ears won’t stop hurting, and we gave her Tylenol, but it isn’t doing anything.” Her mom twisted her hands, looking anxiously between you and her daughter. You grabbed your otoscope and got closer to Chloe. You hummed as you looked inside both ears. 

“Any other symptoms?” Langdon asked as you examined her ears. 

“She said her head hurt a little bit, but we thought it was just from the strep,” her dad replied. 

“Strep?”

“She just got over strep throat,” the mom replied. You put away the otoscope.

“Her ears are very swollen, but it doesn’t look like the eardrums are affected. Her strep likely didn’t go away and moved to the sinuses, which gave her an infection,” you explained. You felt bad for the little girl. Her ears were so inflamed that you were shocked she wasn’t crying. “Dr. Langdon, what would you prescribe as treatment?”

“Another round of antibiotics, as well as oxycodone as needed for the pain,” Frank smiled, hands in his pockets. You nodded in agreement. 

“That’s it?”

“That’s it,” he replied. 

“Her ears right now are full of pockets of excess liquid. Her hearing might be slightly affected, but it’d only be temporary. At some point, the pockets will burst and drain out naturally. If they don’t go away and she’s still in pain after finishing the antibiotics, you should come back in.”

“Thank you so much,” the mom smiled gleefully, giving her daughter a kiss on the head. You noticed Frank tense up out of the corner of your eye. 

“We’ll write you a prescription now for everything,” you nodded, opening the curtain and stepping out with Frank behind you. He seemed quieter than before. 

“What’s wrong, Langdon?” you asked, bumping his shoulder. He looked down at you, plastering on a smile. 

“Nothing.”

“I don’t believe that.”

“You never do, cupcake,” he grinned, walking backwards towards the ER entrance. You frowned at the nickname. You don’t remember when he started calling you cupcake, but you didn’t always appreciate it. 

“Where are you going?” you called out, arms crossed.

“STEMI incoming, and I’m going to beat the record.”

“Like hell you are,” you grumbled, following after him. He was like a dog with a bone when he wanted to do something. The STEMI rolled in a moment later. You both ran alongside the gurney as you wheeled it into the emergency OR… 

Langdon did not beat the record (neither did you). But the guy survived, so all in a day’s work. Things managed to calm down a little bit, and you found yourself taking a breather in the break room. You slumped against the wall with a Rice Krispies treat, staring a hole into the opposite wall. The door creaked open, and Frank slumped down next to you.

You sat in companionable silence.

“Wanna see me shotgun this Red Bull?” He asked, holding up the can.

“That sounds like a terrible idea,” you responded. “But yes.”

It went about as poorly as expected. Frank’s scrubs were now covered in the energy drink. But it made you laugh, actually snorting laughing. He was an idiot, one whom you were in charge of.

“Glad my failures entertain you.”

“Always,” 

Frank smiled. You were waiting to see the smile reach his eyes, but you knew progress was slow. You cleared your throat. 

“What happened earlier?”

“Earlier?”

“With the kid. You got kinda…distant.”

Frank looked down at his hands. He played with the wedding band on his finger, twisting it around. You observed the action.

“I just haven’t seen Tanner in a while,” Frank admits. “And it’s hard.”

“You haven’t?” He wore his friendship bracelet everywhere. Frank wore Tanner’s friendship bracelet everywhere, you’d noticed. You knew he had to be the light of his life. “How—?”

“Abby left me,” Frank shrugged. You felt your heart drop. “After the…she was mad at me. For lying. For everything.” Langdon ran a hand through his hair. “I haven’t seen him since. Courts are still figuring out custody.” He takes his ring off, holding it up in front of you both. “And I didn’t want people to know.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, I’m fine,” Frank forced a smile, in a way a totally not fine person would. 

What do you do in this situation? Sit and empathize, you guess. You’ve prided yourself on being good at comforting, but you didn’t always know what to say. 

“Do you mind not telling anyone?” Frank murmured. God, he looked like a wounded puppy with those eyes. 

“Of course I won’t.” You paused for a second. “Would working on the amputee make you feel better?”

“Yes.”

~ * ~

You’re not sure why you did it. Following your co-worker home was never a good idea. Following the mystery that was Frank Langdon was a worse idea. But you couldn’t get that look of his out of your mind, nor the way he held his ring like he wasn’t sure if he should toss it or cherish it. And frankly, you were nosy. 

You follow a little bit behind him as he walks. Luck had it that he didn’t drive to work (your snooping would’ve ended then), but that didn’t leave many options in the closest area. He didn’t ride the bus either. He walked for several blocks, and there were a few close calls where you would roll into the bushes very sleek and cool like a movie spy. You were kidding yourself; you fell into the bushes like a flying squirrel. 

Thoughts of squirrel-like tendencies left your mind as you watched him enter the three-star hotel near the hospital. 

Well, shit.

[the-whole-thing-through]

Oh man :rubs hands together in glee: my fav thing, doing analysis on fictional characters about things that absolutely do not matter at all! And it just so happens that Matt's Catholicism is one of my favorite things to be a pedantic asshole about! So without further ado, let's get into it:

The Netflix show really ramped up Matt's religiosity and Catholicism. Comics Matt was never really depicted as being overtly religious or a practicing Catholic until far more recent runs which were clearly influenced by the show. Im not saying this is a bad thing, just a fact that I like to point out because, for the majority of Matt's history as a character, he isn't really religious, and its not considered a core part of his personality, unlike say, his anger and his aggression.

BUT we're talking about Show Matt here. When people talk about Matt's Catholicism and so called Catholic Guilt, its often pretty clear to me that they themselves are not Catholic or were not raised Catholic, and that they get the majority of their impressions of Catholicism from media. Show Matt is NOT depicted as being particularly devout. He was raised Catholic, and like a lot of cradle Catholics, I see him as being more "culturally" Catholic than anything. Its pretty heavily implied that as an adult Matt is not really practicing his faith. In his very first confessional scene with Father Lantom, he tells him its been a long time since his last confession. I think we can infer from that statement that the primary reason Matt is now visiting Father Lantom, when he wasn't before, is due to his internal conflict over being Daredevil, and having "the Devil inside" aka his innate aggression and thirst for violence, over any sort of deeply held religious belief.

I say "visit Father Lantom" Over going back to church, because we never get any sort of indication that Matt is actually going to Mass, or receiving the Eucharist weekly, which for Catholics, is actually a VERY big deal. We used to say in my home Parish that the church could forgive anything, except not going to Mass. True blue Catholics go to Mass every week to receive the Eucharist. You may show up in a tshirt and jeans, hungover as hell, having just cheated on your wife, but by God you went.

Of course, you could head canon that Matt does go to Mass and its just not being shown, but there isn't even a throwaway line about Matt going to church, so I think its pretty safe to say that he doesn't. Matt has a special father-son bond with Father Lantom, who he clearly respects and considers a mentor, so the confessional scenes are more about Matt seeking his advice rather than being a strict adherence to his religion, or about being actually absolved of any sin or wrongdoing.

Matt clearly doesn't adhere to the church's teachings on pre-marital sex (pssst most Catholics don't.) Not only that, but in one of his flashback scenes to his younger self, Father Lantom makes a point to call Matt out for arguing with his teacher during Catechism class. We know that as a kid at the orphanage Matt got into a lot of fights with the other kids (fights that he picked.) He was most definitely NOT the altar boy that Frank derides him as being. Matt was 100% the "bad kid" during Mass and at the orphanage. The one who argued with teachers and asked inconvenient questions. I imagine that he challenged authority and pushed back a LOT on a lot of the church's official teachings (he is a lawyer, after all.)

There are no openly queer characters on the show, so we never see Matt interact with someone who is openly gay, but there is no universe where I can picture Matt having any sort of religious conflict with homosexuality in general. Furthermore, Father Lantom is 100% a Jesuit priest, and Matt went to a Jesuit high school. Jesuits are notoriously one of the most liberal, progressive, and educated orders in the Catholic Church. Trad Caths HATE Jesuits for these reasons, and many of them consider Jesuits to be worse than non-Catholics. Zero chance that if young Matt DID have an issue with his sexuality, that Father Lantom would tell him that it was a sin, or something to be ashamed of.

But taught homophobia isn't the same as internalized homophobia, I agree. So let's get into THAT. You could easily head canon Matt as bi. The show never confirms his sexuality, other than clearly being attracted to women, and a lot of TV characters default sexuality is just "straight." I think that if Show Matt was bi, and did have any sort of internalized homophobia, it would stem from his upbringing and his relationship with his father over his religious beliefs.

Matt was raised by a single father, whom he idolized and hero worshipped. His dad was a boxer. Matt grew up practically living at Fogwell's, doing his homework in the corner while his dad trained. That's a very heavily male world, of the sort of old school masculinity that is considered uncommon and old fashioned now. He grew up in Hell's Kitchen, which in the show is considered a rough, dangerous, working class neighborhood.

Matt's dad didn't want him to grow up together be a fighter, but he clearly internalized a lot of his dad's beliefs and characteristics. Matt is a lot like his father. Don't be fooled by Charlie Cox's pretty face and cinnamon roll personality. Matt Murdock is 100% an extremely masculine, assertive, aggressive guy. An "alpha male" in the traditional connotation of the word of being a natural leader, not the redpill version. I find that a lot of fans tend to flanderize Matt from season 3 in order to turn him into a 100% soft boy (tm), but that ignores the fact that season 3 is Matt at his lowest and most vulnerable. Matt's true "default" nature, is more like the Matt we see in season 1, the person who is effortlessly confident, bordering on cocky. With season 1 Matt, its easy to see why people listen to him and follow him, despite the fact that a lot of his plans are, honestly, not the best. Its not just his fighting skills, its his entire personality. That's part of his appeal and the fascination of his character. On the surface, he is a mild-mannered, Ivy League educated attorney. He is disabled, so people tend to underestimate him. But that's not his TRUE self, which is that of a complete bruiser. Matt IS Daredevil, partly because he NEEDS the release of going out and beating people up. His innate violence and aggression have to have an "out." In Born Again, a lot of ppl have noted that Matt is significantly meaner and more of an asshole in general than he is in the OG show. Part of it is because of his grief over Foggy, yes, but it's also partly due to the fact that he no longer has that release for his pent up aggressiveness. In terms of coding and tropes, he's pretty much the definition of a masculine coded character (more on this in a sec.)

Knowing this about Matt, I think its easy to see that if he WERE attracted to men, he may have some self-identity issues, especially with the way he was brought up. You could easily explore that in fanfic, and a lot of ppl have and I think that's interesting.

Matt's sexual representation as an adult when we meet him in the Netflix show strikes me as extremely confident and sexually secure. If he did have issues surrounding sex or attraction, he's long since worked through them in college and law school. Matt is incredibly forward and direct when he is attracted to someone. He sleeps with Elektra the very first night he meets her. He flirts with Claire the first night he meets her. He very overtly flirts with Karen pretty much immediately. He clearly enjoys sex, and doesn't seem unduly burdened by sexual hang ups. Of course, we only ever see him hit on women, but I don't see anything reason to think he wouldn't be the same way with men if he was attracted to men.

There's a part II to this, but this essay was getting long. In Part II I'll discuss my fav Daredevil character, the character I see as being the most obviously queer coded in the series, Foggy Nelson

this is how it sounds when people try and connect matt's catholic guilt to his sexuality in mattfoggy fics

[pitchblackespresso]

A Grave Visit (Extended version of this comic from last year)

Comics master post

[silverskye13]

im OBSESSED with you saying Xisuma's fatal flaw would be arrogance, i never would have thought of it and it tickles my lizard brain. could you go into more details about that vibe?

It's a couple things! Granted, I haven't watched Xisuma regularly in about a year, so I've atrophied a bit when it comes to him and his personality. Take what I say with a grain of salt.

I want to note that I don't mean arrogance in the sense that he thinks he's inherently better than people. He tries really hard not to do that -- I've listened to a few of his vods, and a lot of them have to do with deconstructing his worldview, changing assumptions he's made about people and politics, walking back and forth down a line of thought until eventually he settles somewhere on that road.

But during those reconstructions, I noticed they generally came from very heavy assumptions first, things he says with his full chest, and then has to walk back. There is a certain amount of arrogance in assuming you know what you're talking about, when you have only a handful of facts and perspectives at your disposal. This makes the vods interesting. He can talk back and forth with his audience about something he's learning about, and it becomes entertaining watching people discuss with him, and watching his opinion on that thing actively change. But that doesn't change the fact that he tends to start with: "So I saw this thing recently, and I think it's good/bad/morally ambiguous, and here is why."

There is a certain amount of arrogance in assuming you know something correctly automatically.

Which is, actually, my second reason for choosing arrogance. It seems like a lot of Xisuma's "derp" moments, his simple and silly mistakes that he makes when making machines or doing building, etc, stem from moments of arrogance. He assumes he has done something right, doesn't double check it, and then later when it breaks, he figures out something small and simple has gone wrong. Most of the time, this is funny. Look, Xisuma has made a silly mistake again! But sometimes these simple mistakes add hours of frustration, cause complete rebuilds of parts of a structure or machine, or inconvenience other people. It gets harder to justify, then, that little moment of, "No I'm sure it's fine. I won't double check."

There is an amount of arrogance in assuming you know something correctly automatically.

He is very proficient. He is very good at checking himself when the moment strikes him. But he often forgets to make that check, or dismisses the need for that check, only for it to come back for him. And, if we're talking about Fatal Flaws, the idea that there is something you do repeatedly that builds, until eventually it's your undoing, I think it would be those small moments of assumption and arrogance. One day, they come back around.

[gameringgungke]

edit 2: leak is FAKE everyone, go home

so of course i'm keeping up with the pokemon leaks and

I KNEW IT

I FUCKING KNEW IT

I SAID THE KANTO FAVORITISM STARTED BECAUSE OF BW'S BACKLASH AND WAS GOING TO MAJORLY STAGNANTETHE SERIES FOR YEARS AND NOBODY BELIEVED ME

update 113 notes later: might be fake, idk

[saturn-sends-hugs]

YES.

I feel like, especially online, people have a need to be seen as being on the “right side”. We never want to be seen doing or saying something wrong.

But… why? Being wrong isn’t some irreversible thing. So long as you accept other viewpoints and learn from your mistakes, being wrong is just that: a mistake.

But I think the problem comes from how people online treat mistakes. They can be seen as unforgivable. Some people can see the smallest slip up and instantly go on the offensive, no matter what. While something huge and actually damaging might require that, I would argue that most fandom preference just… isn’t that big? Like, you can absolutely debate with people and point out when stuff seems off to you, and that should be listened to, but if you can’t forgive someone for being wrong sometimes, that causes problems.

The instant backlash that a controversial idea can get INSTANTLY makes people not want to even risk being on a “wrong” or “bad” side. There is no debate; you pick a side and you stay there.

Now I’m not saying there aren’t exceptions: I for one have found a LOVELY pocket of fandom that is very open to discussion (clearly, lol :D), and I know that the majority of fandoms are probably more reasonable than we think, it’s just the loudest problems that stand out. And of COURSE, sometimes a problem is actually a problem. Correcting someone with a wrong opinion is never an obligation, and the block button is always an option.

Not sure where I ended up here, but yeah! Seeing both sides of an argument and accepting that there might not be one right answer is a trait that I personally value a lot, and I love seeing people in fandom push back against those harsh delineations between black and white.

Sometimes you won’t know what you think about something right away, and I think people should be allowed some time to explore.

Audience Comprehension of Grey Areas within Conflict in Media

I haven't written an analysis piece in a while, and while I don't necessarily have any thoughts on specific episodes, or a singular show atm, there's something that I've been thinking about recently that I feel like talking about.

In recent years, I've seen subsets of fandoms becoming less and less understanding of the idea of a "grey area" when it comes to fiction, believing that every situation has a right and wrong side, and that there is no way for two feuding characters to both be the logical party in a conflict. Semi-recently I've seen this in two fandoms that I participate in: The Bad Batch (Hunter vs Crosshair) and Good Omens (Crowley vs Aziraphale). Now I've gone into detail about both of these before, so I'm going to try and trim those discussions down for this post, but it's a similar problem in both fandoms and I feel like looking into it a bit.

Tags for @saturn-sends-hugs @inkstainedhandswithrings @eriexplosion and @nobody-expects-the-inquisitorius in case anyone feels like pitching in

Hunter vs Crosshair

Now the relationship between Hunter and Crosshair was... complicated to say the least. There were so many factors that influenced their actions and decisions, which put both of them in a position of being right and wrong simultaneously. And yet despite them both being at fault, there was an ongoing war within the fandom about who was supporting the right side; were you Team Hunter or Team Crosshair? According to some, you couldn't be both because there was no way both of them could be right, could there?

Team Hunter always seemed to be the popular option, as he was considered the morally superior of the two. However, that doesn't mean that he was without faults. In fact, he was greatly flawed: so focused on his own belief of what was the right choice that he struggled to consider others ideas, reckless and impulsive, stubborn. He was far from perfect. But let's be real, nobody is. And yet, despite all of his flaws, Hunter was considered by many to be a character who could do no wrong, and therefore was the obvious man to support in this ongoing conflict.

So what about Crosshair? Well he was brash, cold, a downright arsehole at points, and chose to stay on the side of the Empire. Surely he couldn't be considered the one in the right here? Well, it's not that simple and it never was.

It all boils down to that moment when The Batch left Crosshair on Kamino at the beginning of S1. Hunter and The Batch didn't have much choice. Their own brother was shooting at them, their lives were at risk, and had they stayed there, they likely would have died or been captured. They couldn't have taken Cross with them because they could not guarantee their own safety. As much as he was their brother, he was a threat to them. But we also have to consider this from Crosshair's perspective. Yes, he was trying to capture his own squad, but he'd been mentally manipulated and was in no position to make rational decisions. He was under the Empire's control. And yet, despite being in danger himself, and needing the help of his brothers, he was left behind. It was understandable that he lost faith in them. But neither side is entirely at fault here. They made the best decision they could in that situation, and no the decisions weren't perfect, but when are they ever?

Let's look at the other crucial moment that always gets brought up in this conversation: Crosshair being left on the Kamino landing platform at the end of S1. I've seen many coming to Crosshair's defence here, saying that the squad had no right to leave their brother there. But let's be honest, it could've been so much worse had they taken him. Yes, Crosshair spent over 30 rotations on that platform, but The Batch didn't know that was going to happen. And Crosshair was refusing to come with them. Had they forced him along, that would've done more damage than good; Crosshair was vulnerable, scared of losing his autonomy. Having his brothers force him onto a ship against his will was going to make him more argumentative and stressed. The best thing the Batch could've done in that situation was respect their brother's choice, which they did.

Throughout the entire conflict in this show, both Hunter and Crosshair were right and wrong. It was never as simple as one side being the "good" side, and the other not, their actions were both fair and unfair. No-one could make perfect choices because no situation could allow that. And yet, there was this general understanding across a section of the fandom that a person's entire moral compass could be determined by which side of the argument they fell on, and that there was no way to accommodate both sides at the same time.

Crowley vs Aziraphale

Which brings me onto conflict number 2: the Ineffable Husbands. The ending of S2 was heartbreaking to say the least, and while it was surprising in the moment, in retrospect, it was completely inevitable. And while I remember just how depressed we were after that ending, I also remember just how angry the fandom got with Aziraphale. Our poor angel took the brunt of the hate and was considered by many people to have been the one in the wrong. But Zira wasn't the only perpetrator of that mess. Both of them were to blame, and the storm that hit was always going to come in at some point.

The ending argument parallels a spat that the two had at the beginning of the season, when Crowley and Aziraphale were trying to decide what to do about Gabriel. Aziraphale supported the "fix the problem" approach, suggesting that they should help the Archangel, while Crowley went for the "ditch the problem" approach, claiming they should just dump him in Dartmoor. And while they were both trying to achieve the same thing (eliminate the Gabriel issue), they had both A) came up with different plans and B) assumed that the other would have come up with the same idea as them. They thought their "exactlys" were the same, until Crowley points out the flaw: "I feel like your exactly and my exactly are different exactlys".

And this is how we ended up with the ending of GO S2. Aziraphale wanted to fix the system: he recognised the flaws, and as someone who had dedicated his entire existence to being a good ambassador for Heaven, had viewed it as the only logical solution. It's the exact response you'd expect from someone still trapped in a toxic religious group, a belief that the flaws in your faith can be rectified, no matter what. He made the choice you'd expect him to but where he stumbled was in expecting Crowley, who he knew had been through a great deal of trauma as a result of what Heaven did, to make the same choice as him. He knew how hurt Crowley had been, so it wasn't fair to expect that he would make the same choice.

And yet the same could be said for Crowley. Given Crowley's trauma, ditching Heaven is a perfectly reasonable solution for him. He knows how twisted their morals are, and understands that realistically, no matter he does, there will always be someone higher up the chain who would thwart any attempts to fix the institutional issues. It was perfectly demonstrated by Gabriel being punished for trying to prevent Armageddon. However, Crowley never told Aziraphale about how Gabriel was exiled from Heaven, so it's entirely unfair for him to expect Zira to make the same choice, when he purposefully withheld information from him.

Just like at the beginning of Season 2, they had both had the same end goal in mind, but their approaches differed and they assumed that the other would make the same decision as then. That was their downfall. So yes, as an audience member, you can have your own opinions on which choice you think is better, but it isn't simply as black and white as one being right and one being wrong. They can both be at fault.

Why do I think it's like this?

Ultimately, I think audience reactions to conflicts like this boil down to three things: availability of information to the audience, escapism, and our own battle with morality.

As an audience member, we will always have different information to the characters themselves. When it came to Hunter and Crosshair, we knew what was happening to both characters, so we couldn't understand why characters were making certain decisions, but it's important to remember that we have more information, so of course our own choices would be different. We have context. The same with Good Omens. Like I said, we know what happened to Gabriel, as does Crowley, but Aziraphale doesn't. So while we can back up Crowley's decision, we can't necessarily fault Zira when he doesn't know what we do.

Additionally, as viewers, we seek escapism. The world is a mess and conflicts have so many layers that sometimes a clear answer isn't always easily found. So when we turn to media, we hope for something clearer, something that will tell us exactly what is right and wrong. Things being so morally grey feels to real for us, so we fight to find the good and bad; we want answers so we build up black and white decisions, even if that isn't how things are actually playing out.

Not only this, but I think our own fight for moral superiority influences our consumption of media. We always want to be the "good" person, so we fight to be on the right side. We don't like being wrong and we judge people's morality by whether or not they agree with us because we don't like the idea of siding with a character that isn't entirely good. But life isn't like that. People aren't like that. We're flawed, we make bad decisions, and there is never a perfect answer to the decisions we make. Yes, some choices will always be better than others, but sometimes things are so grey and murky that we can find support and fault in both sides. However, people don't like that. They want to be right, to be good, so they find what they align with most and claim that as the "correct" side, attacking those that disagree because if they don't side with you, then they must be morally inferior. And in all honestly, I think this has just gotten worse over time.

At the end of the day, not everything is black and white, and your understanding of flaws in a character does not mean that you agree with or support them. It can simply be a case of recognition. Things aren't as clear cut as we would like them to be, they are more complicated, and the sooner we understand that, the sooner we can appreciate just how rich some of these stories and characters can be.

[colduncrustable]

the martin antis working so hard to make waves is so funny. like, you are very much allowed to like/dislike any character you please! but making it your whole personality or acting like you’re cooler for it is a little bit silly. you are not morally or intellectually superior for hating on a fiction character.

not to mention all of the characters in tma are very nuanced and complicated, just like real people (!), and erasing all of that to serve a certain narrative is a complete disservice to the entire body of work. jon and martin’s relationship was never meant to be easy, they first and foremost worked closely together as boss/employee, and in a workplace that was actively putting them in dangerous and horrible situations. the whole point is that they’re both super fucked up but they have each other anyway. they both have flaws, they both have gone through a great deal both with and without each other, but they found love anyway. the idea that the dynamic change in s5 is due to martin just being this villain is so wild? like he’s not a doormat anymore but he also loves jon so fiercely and stands by him over and over again?

jon hated him, jon ignored him, was verbally horrible to him again and again, literally sent him on a dangerous investigation and said if anyone had to die might as well be him, jon accused him of murder, screamed at him, jon was on the run, jon died. martin was his number one defender through everything, even when honestly? he didn’t do a lot to prove he deserved it. but martin was strong in his loyalty and did his best to be a supporter anyway. he picked up extra work, he thought of him kindly when no one else did, he mourned him, and he put himself directly in the line of fire for jon. for everyone, yes, but especially for jon, he says that. because after everything, protecting jon is still his number one priority.

it’s so important to his character that he isn’t s1 martin anymore—that he learns to be a real person who has thoughts and feelings and a backbone. jon wanted that, and does it not say something that they don’t work out until martin learns to have a little bite? there’s a difference between being a real complicated traumatized human person, and just straight up being evil, or an asshole. jon had to learn how to be a lot of softer things but martin had to learn how to square his shoulders and stick out his chin. they had different arcs, and that doesn’t make either of them inherently evil or bad. it makes them real and not perfect and very multilayered, yeah.

martin didn’t handle every choice or action perfectly, he made a lot of mistakes, and he never claims to be the best person ever. but jon also fucked up, a lot. it isn’t a competition or a comparison, that’s really not how that works. but they work because of their flaws. that’s a big part of them fitting together. martin represented the humanity they were saving, with all his good and bad. jon was well beyond that, and while that doesn’t inherently compromise his character, it does mean he’s viewed in a much different light.

(meaning i think jon’s sins are seen very very different to martin’s.) (to be clear i think both deserve to be looked at critically, but hating either of them devoutly seems sort of silly.)

i’m not sure how you can listen to tma and all the ways it dissects and reflects on humanity and turn around and run blogs or make posts in the fandom about how you hate one of the main characters for being all of that.

jon never would’ve made it through without martin, even if martin wasn’t the key to everything, he was the reason to push through and not give up. martin is why jon didn’t go full monster mode, why he held onto who he was and his humanity, even with the whole ‘kill bill’ thing. martin gave him a reason to keep going, to try, to care so deeply. obviously there were other factors but jon says it himself, martin you are my reason.

if you can’t handle the fact that martin isn’t a grade a soft boy by the end of the show that’s a lot more about you than it is about him. he grew and maybe not always for the better but he could be a real person for jon instead of some kind of mirror or blank slate to be reflected on. i genuinely don’t understand how he can be misunderstood so deeply.

they’re both fucked up ! and if they are alive Somewhere Else you bet your ass they’re having long talks and going to therapy and fighting and making up and pacing the floors and figuring it all out together. it isn’t clean or easy or necessarily enjoyable all the time, but humanity isn’t either, love isn’t either. they went through unimaginable trauma, and expecting either of them to be holding it together any better than they already are is wild. context, it’s important. but let’s not turn multi-dimensional characters into flat one word answers.

it’s very human to like and dislike, love and hate based off of bias and experiences and perspective. but also opinion does not make fact. everything is relative, everything is subjective, everything everything everything. it’s an open discussion yada yada idk i’m just screaming into the wall about all the nonsense.

and beyond all of that, discourse is so useless. criticism and constructive conversations are really really important but discourse is pointless! oh you ship these people? well that inherently threatens my ship! oh you like this character that i hate? well that makes me feel invalid for hating them. like what you like, hate what you hate, have your feelings. but if you post shit on the internet you will get people who disagree, sorry, that’s how it is. partaking in little arguments over who is right or wrong when it doesn’t actually have to do with anything harmful or unhealthy makes no sense though. posting on the internet about all the hate you have in your heart when the world is already so full of it doesn’t actually do anything but add more bad to an already very large pile of bad.

things can be discussions not arguments sometimes, i promise. it’s not always tooth and nail, and let’s not forget, most of it is over things that never need to be fought over.

[wolfsong-the-bloody-beast]

This quest annoys me. A lot. So far, I've never done it. I intend to try with another character at some point. I originally thought I'd try it with my human noble for RP, but he's a relatively nice (and rather religious) guy, so I feel like the disrespect of desecrating an ancient burial site, even if it's a culture he may not understand, is still a bit too much. I mean, I don't see a problem with being able to do it as an option, I guess. I just feel like that being the only solution to the "puzzle" is kind of stupid. Hell, at least don't lock the damn mosaic piece behind it. I don't even need the loot.

On this playthrough, I managed to exploit the mount glitch that lets you clip through the door of the crypt without destroying the graves, just to retrieve the mosaic piece. Also, found out too late that there is a mod for this.

[kerryweaverlesbian]

Castiel likes Dean he likes him a lot he enjoys when he's annoying he doesn't want to punish him or say mean things about him he doesn't view their friendship as a burden on him he isn't holding past slights over Dean's head especially when he knows the full context he doesn't feel used by Dean he thinks Dean is the best man in the world and he loves him!!!!!!

[canarydarity]

having a normal one watching Bdubs lim life tonight and thinking about how when Bdubs betrayed Tango in last life, Skizz told Tango that for the sake of team best he had to go and forgive him.

But when Bdubs boogey kills Skizz in lim life before team ties is even really formed, Skizz is allowed to have it out for Bdubs for almost the entire first half of the season, even when the clockers ally with them and it would've been easier to let sleeping dogs lie.

Tango, the perpetually extraneous and undervalued member of his alliances...the too often shoved aside and betrayed...being told it was his duty to the team to forgive bdubs and move on....

But no one—especially not Tango—tried to tell Skizz to let it go.

[bloodyhandprint]

when fictional characters say incredibly cruel things they don't mean in the heat of an argument i'm cheering and hollering. when people in real life say incredibly cruel things they don't mean in the heat of an argument it suddenly hits a lot different. and i don't know if there's something wrong with me that i can't let some things go when they happen in real life

[parasitoidism]

the reason i specifically try to avoid any and all persona related leaks is because if I hear anything about a persona 1 2 or 4 remake it's going to pre-emptively kill off a substantial number of my braincells. different reasons for each game