#and if you can’t accept a character doing something morally grey

[saturn-sends-hugs]

YES.

I feel like, especially online, people have a need to be seen as being on the “right side”. We never want to be seen doing or saying something wrong.

But… why? Being wrong isn’t some irreversible thing. So long as you accept other viewpoints and learn from your mistakes, being wrong is just that: a mistake.

But I think the problem comes from how people online treat mistakes. They can be seen as unforgivable. Some people can see the smallest slip up and instantly go on the offensive, no matter what. While something huge and actually damaging might require that, I would argue that most fandom preference just… isn’t that big? Like, you can absolutely debate with people and point out when stuff seems off to you, and that should be listened to, but if you can’t forgive someone for being wrong sometimes, that causes problems.

The instant backlash that a controversial idea can get INSTANTLY makes people not want to even risk being on a “wrong” or “bad” side. There is no debate; you pick a side and you stay there.

Now I’m not saying there aren’t exceptions: I for one have found a LOVELY pocket of fandom that is very open to discussion (clearly, lol :D), and I know that the majority of fandoms are probably more reasonable than we think, it’s just the loudest problems that stand out. And of COURSE, sometimes a problem is actually a problem. Correcting someone with a wrong opinion is never an obligation, and the block button is always an option.

Not sure where I ended up here, but yeah! Seeing both sides of an argument and accepting that there might not be one right answer is a trait that I personally value a lot, and I love seeing people in fandom push back against those harsh delineations between black and white.

Sometimes you won’t know what you think about something right away, and I think people should be allowed some time to explore.

Audience Comprehension of Grey Areas within Conflict in Media

I haven't written an analysis piece in a while, and while I don't necessarily have any thoughts on specific episodes, or a singular show atm, there's something that I've been thinking about recently that I feel like talking about.

In recent years, I've seen subsets of fandoms becoming less and less understanding of the idea of a "grey area" when it comes to fiction, believing that every situation has a right and wrong side, and that there is no way for two feuding characters to both be the logical party in a conflict. Semi-recently I've seen this in two fandoms that I participate in: The Bad Batch (Hunter vs Crosshair) and Good Omens (Crowley vs Aziraphale). Now I've gone into detail about both of these before, so I'm going to try and trim those discussions down for this post, but it's a similar problem in both fandoms and I feel like looking into it a bit.

Tags for @saturn-sends-hugs @inkstainedhandswithrings @eriexplosion and @nobody-expects-the-inquisitorius in case anyone feels like pitching in

Hunter vs Crosshair

Now the relationship between Hunter and Crosshair was... complicated to say the least. There were so many factors that influenced their actions and decisions, which put both of them in a position of being right and wrong simultaneously. And yet despite them both being at fault, there was an ongoing war within the fandom about who was supporting the right side; were you Team Hunter or Team Crosshair? According to some, you couldn't be both because there was no way both of them could be right, could there?

Team Hunter always seemed to be the popular option, as he was considered the morally superior of the two. However, that doesn't mean that he was without faults. In fact, he was greatly flawed: so focused on his own belief of what was the right choice that he struggled to consider others ideas, reckless and impulsive, stubborn. He was far from perfect. But let's be real, nobody is. And yet, despite all of his flaws, Hunter was considered by many to be a character who could do no wrong, and therefore was the obvious man to support in this ongoing conflict.

So what about Crosshair? Well he was brash, cold, a downright arsehole at points, and chose to stay on the side of the Empire. Surely he couldn't be considered the one in the right here? Well, it's not that simple and it never was.

It all boils down to that moment when The Batch left Crosshair on Kamino at the beginning of S1. Hunter and The Batch didn't have much choice. Their own brother was shooting at them, their lives were at risk, and had they stayed there, they likely would have died or been captured. They couldn't have taken Cross with them because they could not guarantee their own safety. As much as he was their brother, he was a threat to them. But we also have to consider this from Crosshair's perspective. Yes, he was trying to capture his own squad, but he'd been mentally manipulated and was in no position to make rational decisions. He was under the Empire's control. And yet, despite being in danger himself, and needing the help of his brothers, he was left behind. It was understandable that he lost faith in them. But neither side is entirely at fault here. They made the best decision they could in that situation, and no the decisions weren't perfect, but when are they ever?

Let's look at the other crucial moment that always gets brought up in this conversation: Crosshair being left on the Kamino landing platform at the end of S1. I've seen many coming to Crosshair's defence here, saying that the squad had no right to leave their brother there. But let's be honest, it could've been so much worse had they taken him. Yes, Crosshair spent over 30 rotations on that platform, but The Batch didn't know that was going to happen. And Crosshair was refusing to come with them. Had they forced him along, that would've done more damage than good; Crosshair was vulnerable, scared of losing his autonomy. Having his brothers force him onto a ship against his will was going to make him more argumentative and stressed. The best thing the Batch could've done in that situation was respect their brother's choice, which they did.

Throughout the entire conflict in this show, both Hunter and Crosshair were right and wrong. It was never as simple as one side being the "good" side, and the other not, their actions were both fair and unfair. No-one could make perfect choices because no situation could allow that. And yet, there was this general understanding across a section of the fandom that a person's entire moral compass could be determined by which side of the argument they fell on, and that there was no way to accommodate both sides at the same time.

Crowley vs Aziraphale

Which brings me onto conflict number 2: the Ineffable Husbands. The ending of S2 was heartbreaking to say the least, and while it was surprising in the moment, in retrospect, it was completely inevitable. And while I remember just how depressed we were after that ending, I also remember just how angry the fandom got with Aziraphale. Our poor angel took the brunt of the hate and was considered by many people to have been the one in the wrong. But Zira wasn't the only perpetrator of that mess. Both of them were to blame, and the storm that hit was always going to come in at some point.

The ending argument parallels a spat that the two had at the beginning of the season, when Crowley and Aziraphale were trying to decide what to do about Gabriel. Aziraphale supported the "fix the problem" approach, suggesting that they should help the Archangel, while Crowley went for the "ditch the problem" approach, claiming they should just dump him in Dartmoor. And while they were both trying to achieve the same thing (eliminate the Gabriel issue), they had both A) came up with different plans and B) assumed that the other would have come up with the same idea as them. They thought their "exactlys" were the same, until Crowley points out the flaw: "I feel like your exactly and my exactly are different exactlys".

And this is how we ended up with the ending of GO S2. Aziraphale wanted to fix the system: he recognised the flaws, and as someone who had dedicated his entire existence to being a good ambassador for Heaven, had viewed it as the only logical solution. It's the exact response you'd expect from someone still trapped in a toxic religious group, a belief that the flaws in your faith can be rectified, no matter what. He made the choice you'd expect him to but where he stumbled was in expecting Crowley, who he knew had been through a great deal of trauma as a result of what Heaven did, to make the same choice as him. He knew how hurt Crowley had been, so it wasn't fair to expect that he would make the same choice.

And yet the same could be said for Crowley. Given Crowley's trauma, ditching Heaven is a perfectly reasonable solution for him. He knows how twisted their morals are, and understands that realistically, no matter he does, there will always be someone higher up the chain who would thwart any attempts to fix the institutional issues. It was perfectly demonstrated by Gabriel being punished for trying to prevent Armageddon. However, Crowley never told Aziraphale about how Gabriel was exiled from Heaven, so it's entirely unfair for him to expect Zira to make the same choice, when he purposefully withheld information from him.

Just like at the beginning of Season 2, they had both had the same end goal in mind, but their approaches differed and they assumed that the other would make the same decision as then. That was their downfall. So yes, as an audience member, you can have your own opinions on which choice you think is better, but it isn't simply as black and white as one being right and one being wrong. They can both be at fault.

Why do I think it's like this?

Ultimately, I think audience reactions to conflicts like this boil down to three things: availability of information to the audience, escapism, and our own battle with morality.

As an audience member, we will always have different information to the characters themselves. When it came to Hunter and Crosshair, we knew what was happening to both characters, so we couldn't understand why characters were making certain decisions, but it's important to remember that we have more information, so of course our own choices would be different. We have context. The same with Good Omens. Like I said, we know what happened to Gabriel, as does Crowley, but Aziraphale doesn't. So while we can back up Crowley's decision, we can't necessarily fault Zira when he doesn't know what we do.

Additionally, as viewers, we seek escapism. The world is a mess and conflicts have so many layers that sometimes a clear answer isn't always easily found. So when we turn to media, we hope for something clearer, something that will tell us exactly what is right and wrong. Things being so morally grey feels to real for us, so we fight to find the good and bad; we want answers so we build up black and white decisions, even if that isn't how things are actually playing out.

Not only this, but I think our own fight for moral superiority influences our consumption of media. We always want to be the "good" person, so we fight to be on the right side. We don't like being wrong and we judge people's morality by whether or not they agree with us because we don't like the idea of siding with a character that isn't entirely good. But life isn't like that. People aren't like that. We're flawed, we make bad decisions, and there is never a perfect answer to the decisions we make. Yes, some choices will always be better than others, but sometimes things are so grey and murky that we can find support and fault in both sides. However, people don't like that. They want to be right, to be good, so they find what they align with most and claim that as the "correct" side, attacking those that disagree because if they don't side with you, then they must be morally inferior. And in all honestly, I think this has just gotten worse over time.

At the end of the day, not everything is black and white, and your understanding of flaws in a character does not mean that you agree with or support them. It can simply be a case of recognition. Things aren't as clear cut as we would like them to be, they are more complicated, and the sooner we understand that, the sooner we can appreciate just how rich some of these stories and characters can be.

[yetrop]

Good Omens is autistic—here’s why!

First off, there’s the angelic/demonic nature of the protagonists

They’re trying to blend in with humanity, but have to pick things up as they go along

Because of this, the way they interact with and view people is different from the expected norm

Which also means they're often confused by human customs and find it difficult to read social cues (think Aziraphale asking Maggie if she actually thinks she isn’t crying later on in this scene)

Crowley has to hide his eyes, a part of his identity, from everyone except Aziraphale and the other demons for fear of seeming different/threatening/not human (masking in the most literal sense of the word)

Muriel is concerned with acting and speaking “correctly” to be seen as human

Even though both main characters don’t fit in with humanity because of their angelic/demonic nature, they also don’t fit in with their respective sides, who view them both as strange and don’t understand them. The only place they find acceptance/belonging is with each other. If that isn’t a neurodivergent (and very queer) storyline, I don’t know what is.

Next up, there’s Aziraphale as a whole

The way he stims

Loves routine, dislikes change

Gets uncomfortable when he has to break rules/disrupt order

Taking things literally— “You can’t drive my Bentley.” “I can— I have a license!” (also, this scene is another example of his insistence on order and rules— he insisted on getting a license before they were even legally required)

Paces back and forth talking to himself, planning out what he’s going to say before a conversation (scripting)

The way he suppresses stimming around Heaven by clasping hands behind back, feels uncomfortable and overstimulated there

Bookshop is super cluttered, he has an organizational system that is comprehensible to basically exclusively him

Clumsy, often sucks at motor coordination

Easily startled

He loves alone time, especially when he’s in his own space— he does everything he can to keep customers away from his bookshop

Attaches a lot of sentimental value to inanimate objects (“I’ve kept this in tip-top condition for over 180 years!”)

Incredibly passionate about his interests, especially magic and books

Black and white thinking and rigid morality— He loves and trusts Crowley more than the other angels, but still has tendency to categorize Heaven, Hell, angels and demons as exclusively good or bad (“of course you didn’t go back to Hell— you’re the bad guys!”)

Crowley’s definitely got something neurodivergent going on too (leaning towards ADHD, but potentially AuDHD)

The way he sits in chairs

Hell, (…or Heaven, whatever…) even just the “ducks!” moment alone is enough to show that that his mind jumps around a lot to unexpected loose threads rather than focusing on the subject at hand

Impulsivity

Creative and has a vivid inner world. As pointed out by God Herself, he has what the other demons don’t— an imagination

Craves novelty, frequently changes appearance

Stimming starmaker

This one is from the book, but it’s too good not to point out: the way he idolizes characters like Bond and copies his behaviors off of what he thinks a cool human would do. He has a new computer because it’s “the sort of thing Crowley felt that the sort of human he tried to be would have” (pg 239)

His understanding of how humans fall in love is based on a Richard Curtis film he’s seen

His insistence on asking questions when things don’t make sense to him, knowing why things are the way they are rather than blindly accepting them

And of course, there’s the themes of the story

Black and white thinking vs shades of grey

Breaking away from a world that doesn’t accept you to find love, belonging, and safety

And, as demonstrated time and time again by our two protagonists: intelligence isn’t synonymous with interpersonal skills (…or common sense.)

Thanks for reading all of that! This isn’t the kind of post I normally make, but I have so many thoughts about this that have been on my mind for almost two years now, so I decided to share them.

While there are of course a lot of plot-related reasons for why they behave the way that they do and many of the traits I brushed on could be explained by other factors, I still find it interesting to explore it through a neurodivergent lens. I also think the existence of angels with physical disabilities (like Saraqueal) adds credibility to the idea that other types of disabilities or neurodivergence is at the very least possible for angels and demons in this universe.

Feel free to point out anything I forgot to include (which I have no doubt is a lot) and let me know your own thoughts in the comments or tags— I’d love to hear them!

[mrsdesade]

I'd like something based on Sage vs fem!supe! Maybe them arguing and then Homie forced to choose between one of them, but everything ending up with something unexpected! You choose what :)

Shattered glasses;

Pairing: Homelander x fem!super (I use Ophera bc I don't like writing ''y/n'' y'know) TW: slight angst, mention of poisoning, morally grey fem!supe Timeline: season 4 Words count: 2,7k Note: thanks for the request dear anon, I was waiting for writing something about s4 :) ofc no hate for any characters!!

Sister Sage never liked you. From the first moment she saw you, she knew you would be a hindrance. She's not jealous, not even in love with him, she just wanted to control Homelander, and you already had him in your grasp. But the little flaws in your absolutely not perfect relationship with him were the perfect opportunity for her to destroy you and get you fired.

For months she had been trying to make you look incompetent or unable to do your work, she was the smartest woman in the world, and in her eyes you were just another showgirl like the others.

But you were on the Seven from the early years and, oh, you didn't liked at all the fact that Homelander had chosen her as his advisor.

You, you are his partner, he should listen to you.

It has always been about control, rarely about love. But now you feel jealousy boiling in your veins, your control over him is slipping away, and you feel in danger. You know that you'll have to prove to Sage that it is not so easy to get rid of you.

Sister Sage sat comfortably at the table of the Seven, her hands folded in front of her, sipping a steaming cup of chamomile tea. With a delicate motion, she set the cup back down on its saucer, and flashed you a calm smile.

“I think you’re letting your emotions cloud your judgment. You’re making this personal. It’s simply business.”

She's too confident in her intellectual abilities, to the point of arrogance. She's good at reading people, especially their feelings and insecurities, and she uses that to her advantage in arguments, trying to make you say something stupid and make you look like a fool.

“You’ve had your chance at the top, dear. It’s time to accept that things have changed.”

You are standing, with your hands placed on the table, clenched into two fists to hold back your nervousness, looking for the right words to face her, but nothing comes out of your lips.

“Listen, I understand your… frustration. After all, you’re nothing more than a relic these days, don’t you think? A fading star.”

The words hit you like a blow to the gut. Her casual insults were like salt rubbed vigorously into an open wound. You fight back the urge to respond with anger, knowing that she's goading you into a reaction.

“Oh, I hit a nerve, didn’t I? That’s exactly what I meant. You’re stuck in the past. You can’t adjust to the changes. It’s kinda pathetic, really.”

You wanted nothing more than to reach across the table and wipe that arrogant smile off her face, but you knew that’s exactly what she wanted. So you took a deep breath, trying to maintain some semblance of composure.

“I suggest you think about your words better, the last person who dared to call me pathetic didn't end well.”

Sage raised an eyebrow, intrigued.

“You can try to intimidate me all you want, but it won’t change the fact that your time has passed. No matter what you do, you won't be able to get your spotlight back.”

“Dear, I fill the stadiums, the arenas, millions of people come to hear my voice every night, every single event is sold out in minutes! I wouldn't call this decay of a carreer.”

“Ah, yes, the fame and the adoration of the masses. Impressive, really. But I was referring to another type of spotlight here.”

She paused for a moment, studying your face before continuing. Your gaze has become dark, almost threatening, you know perfectly well where he wants his speech to end.

“We both know you lost your real spotlight a long time ago…the one that matters. Homelander won’t change his mind about me.”

Your expression betrays your emotions, anger and frustration bubbling just beneath the surface.

“You're playing a dangerous game Sage, you know that? You think you can just waltz in here and take my place?”

“Ophera, is it so hard to accept that I’m better equipped for the job? You’ve always been so blinded by your ego and your pride. Your strategy is always to stay safe and not lose your career, Vought needs much more than this.”

Her expression was cool and calculating, as If she had already mapped out every possible reaction you might have.

“And let's clarify, I don’t need to take your spot. I already have.”

Your face twisted in anger, your fists gripped the table’s edge, under your gloves knuckles turning white.

“You arrogant little—“ you began, but she calmly interrupted you.

“Now, now, there’s no need for insults.” she chided, her voice dripping with faux sweetness. “We’re adults here, we can speak calmly and intelligently like any normal person, don’t you agree?”

“You're feeling cool, mh? Acting all smart and knowing everything. I've been a part of this Seven for years. And you, you're nothing.”

Her cool demeanor began to crack, and a hint of annoyance flickered across her face at your words.

“Ah, here it goes. The same old tired argument. I've been here longer, I'm more experienced, blah blah blah.”

She leaned forward, her eyes boring into yours with an intensity that contradicted her calm exterior.

“Oh, did I hit a nerve?” you teased, mirroring her earlier taunt.

“Don't get too comfortable.” she retorted, her voice slightly sharpened. “You should remember that your position here is fragile. One wrong word, one wrong move, and you could lose everything you have left.“

You leaned forward now, your voice lowering as you met her gaze.

“You seem to forget that I’ve still a pretty big influence over Homelander myself. I can make things difficult for you if I want to.”

“I think we both know who he listens to these days.”

The conversation was cut short when the door to the room burst open, and Homelander strolled in, his presence immediately filling the space. His eyes flicked between the two of you, sensing the tension in the room.

“What's going on here?”

You and Sage both turned your attention to him, quickly composing yourselves.

“Just a chat. I was merely informing Ophera of some important developments within about the Vought future.”

Homelander glanced at you, tilting his head slightly as he observed.

“A chat, huh? Didn't look like a friendly one to me.”

“You're right. And since it's clear that Sage loves telling you lies, I'll tell you that wasn't just a simple chat.” an adorable, mischievous smile escapes from your lips. Exposing the little lie she told to him.

Homelander's eyes immediately landed on Sage, waiting for her to respond. “Care to explain?”

Sage shifted in her seat, clearly irritated that you had exposed her lie. “It's nothing serious, just a typical argument between colleagues. Nothing you need to worry about.” she replied quickly, trying to downplay the situation.

And incredibly, it works.

Homelander nods like a tamed puppy and believes her.

You couldn't help but feel a pang of frustration as Homelander seemed to buy into Sage's explanation so easily. It seemed like she had him wrapped around her little finger.

“I see, things like this happens, just keep it professional, ladies, okay?”

Sage shot you a quick, victorious look, smug knowing her sweet words to him had prevailed, again.

Disappointment flooding through your veins. It infuriated you how easily Homelander seemed to believe blindly in to Sage's words. You tried to maintain a neutral expression. But you won't have another opportunity like this to assert your dominance, you have to think of something quickly. Sage sure is smart, but you can be really sly.

You pretended to shrug nonchalantly, even though inside you were seething with anger. But you weren't done yet.

You locked eyes with Homelander, ensuring he was listening to you. And then you spoke, your voice dripping with feigned concern.

“It’s true, it wasn’t a big deal. But there’s one thing that concerns me, Homelander. May I be honest with you?”

He tilted his head slightly, curiosity piqued. “You've to.”

“I felt a bit insecure lately and I was wondering...If I should save Sage from poisoning or me from falling from a building. Who would you save?”

Your question comes like an unexpected bolt of lightning, without anyone being able to foresee it or understand its real intention. You cross your arms over your chest and walk around the room slowly, waiting for a response.

He's is taken aback by your question, and the room falls silent. Sage glanced at you quickly, an unexpected flicker of worry in her eyes.

Homelander's eyes follow you as you walk around the room. He's quiet for a few moments, considering the weight of your words before answering.

“Why should I choose, I can save both without effort, you know that.” he finally responds, a slight smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

Your lips curled into a smirk - the answer is far from satisfactory.

“Of course, but let's say you can only choose one.” you persist, your voice steady. “Who would it be?”

His expression unreadable. He's definitely taken off guard by your insistence, and you can see a hint of annoyance starting to form underneath the surface.

“There are too many factors to consider, I can't just say one random name. Fuck, you and your stupid questions...”

Sage looks down at the cup of chamomile tea she was drinking a few minutes ago, and for a second the fear of having been poisoned actually makes her shiver.

“And that's why I'm here to listen all of your thoughts about.” you smile at him once again, hiding something dark behind your kind tone.

Homelander sighs, finally realizing you won’t back down. He crosses his arms, staring at you with slight irritation.

“Fine. Let's say, If I had to choose, I'd likely save Sage first.”

Sage's head snapped up upon hearing his decision, and her eyes widened in surprise. But you answer him carefully, still smiling.

“Are you sure about that?”

“I mean, you're more resistant than her, you wouldn't really die falling from a building. While Sage body is totally human, he would certainly die without an antidote for the poison.”

Your smirk widens, you expected this.

“There, happy now? I solve your fucking riddle.”

You quickly turn away from the conversation and casually walk over towards the large window you know is behind Sage's seat. Acting as if you were admiring the view outside, you casually reach for the handle and pull the window open. The wind that blows in is strong enough to be unexpected, the documents on the table rattle, and the curtains wave violently.

Sage's hand involuntarily releases her cup of tea, and as it hits the floor and the liquid splashes in her direction, a look of panic and realization flashed across her face.

She quickly rises from her seat, her body shaking subtly, trying to play it off as if it was just a simple accident. But anyone can see the flicker of panic behind her eyes. The liquid seeps into the carpet, staining it a dark brown.

“You— Ophera what have you done to my tea?!”

Homelander's eyes narrow, his attention suddenly diverted from the ongoing conversation.

You feign surprise, tilting your head to the side innocently. “Me? Nothing.”

“Bullshit!” Sage points a finger at you, a mixture of shock and fury on her face. She starts to feel strange, she feels dizzy and her legs are shaking.

You turn back to the large open window, the strong gust of wind causing your hair to flutter and the hem of your uniform too. As you look outside, you subtly step back, closer and closer to the edge, the tips of your feet barely holding onto the edge of the window frame.

“What the hell are you doing Ophera?” he say, his voice sharp. “Get away from the window, where has your fear of great heights gone?”

Your eyes flick toward Homelander, a sly smile playing on your lips as you continue to stand dangerously close to the open window, your words dripping with a hint of manipulation.

“Well, I guess now you finally have a real opportunity to choose, love.”

A moment of silence hangs in the air as they're taken off guard by your audacity. Suddenly, without any warning, you lean back, and with a graceful leap, you launch yourself out of the window.

Homelander's heart skips a beat.

“No…No, don't—” he exclaimed desperately, his body moving on instinct.

The wind immediately engulfs you as the ground rapidly comes closer and closer. You feel the adrenaline pumping through your veins, looking at the blue sky, the thrill of the freefall mixing with the intense rush of the air hitting your back.

In an instant, a blur of red and blue rushes towards you as Homelander flies out, he flies towards you at superhuman speed shattering the glass of the other windows. He moves closing the distance between you and him in mere seconds.

From the window, Sage leans out, looking at you both with disbelief. Her eyes widened, and her mouth hangs open, speechless at the turn of events.

Homelander catches you mid-air, wrapping his arms around you, the wind still rushes around you both. You can feel his hands shaking a bit as he holds you.

You look up at him, a cheeky smirk dancing on your lips. A breathless laugh escapes you, the adrenaline still pumping through your veins. Your heart pounds, and a sense of exhilaration washes over you. The suddenness of your action still hangs in the air, and his surprise is evident in his eyes.

“Ops, I guess you picked me.”

Homelander huffs, his grip on you slightly loosening, relaxing, floating in air with you. He shakes his head, relief and frustration clear on his face.

“You're out of your goddamn mind woman.”

“Maybe I am. But, at least you still care enough to save me.” you chuckle softly, enjoying the moment of his attention.

He rolls his eyes, but you can see a smile on his lips and he's slowly moving in the hair to coming back inside the Tower.

You reach out to caress his face gently, your touch tender against his skin. Your hand trail over his jaw, feeling the slight stubble beneath your fingertips. Your other hand still grips onto the fabric of his suit, holding onto him.

“Y'know...I thought Sage brainwashed you into choosing her over me, but I'm happy to see that's not the case.”

His expression softens a little, his eyes meeting yours.

“Believe me, I think she tried. But she didn’t brainwash me at all.” he grumbles, his voice low. “I’m not that easy to control. You should know that..”

“I know you're far from being easy to control. You’re too stubborn and prideful for that.”

He huffs again, with his bold smirk on his lips. “You’re quite stubborn too, maybe more than me. Just look at your little stunt back there.”

As he lands back inside the room with you in his arms, the scene is a little chaotic. He takes a moment to check you are okay, before his eyes land on Sage, who is now passed out on the floor.

“Was really necessary to poison her? Despite your jealousy he was an excellent strategy member to the team.” he say, raising an eyebrow at you.

“Relax. She's not dead. There wasn't a single drop of poison or anything in her tea.” you look down at Sage's unconscious body, lying motionless on the floor, and a small, satisfied smile lifts the corners of your lips.

“Then why the hell is she passed out?” he asks, puzzled.

You kneel down next to her and tilt your head to the side as you examine her unconscious form. The feeling of triumph washes over you, knowing that you managed to manipulate her fear and doubt to your advantage.

“With a brain like hers, mental deceptions are more effective than anything else. It was enough for me to convince her that she had been poisoned and goodnight little sunshine.”

He lets out a low whistle, impressed by the simplicity of your tactic.

“Damn. You really know how to mess with people's heads.”

There's admiration in his voice. An admiration for you that you can still wear like a medal.

“But you really had to prove a point in such a dramatic manner, huh?”

You stand back up, brushing off your uniform and looking at Homelander with a smug smile.

“I had to do something to prove to her, and you, who your favourite really was.”

-------

Hope you like it! I will calmly continue to write about him based on your ask box requests, I will not leave anyone unsatisfied, I promise <3

[kindaasrikal]

Garmadon is probably my favourite example of how intrusive thoughts are like.

Is he a little yellow (black?) lego man with cup hands? Yes

Is he also someone whose suffered from intrusive thoughts and desires that he does not want to do since young, and due to suffering through them for so long his resolve eventually broke to these thoughts as he became the one thing he never wanted to be? Yes, yes he is.

For decades upon decades he had to sit with thoughts and desires he knew was bad and had to actively resist against. Dealing with intrusive thoughts is not easy, seeing as it depends on a persons will power, their own self acceptance and awareness on who they are, and how persistent they can be.

With Garmadon, he had to deal with the shame knowing that everyone most close too him knows he has these thoughts and desires and that can way down on a persons self esteem and will/resilience, especially when you seem to be surrounded by someone seemingly ‘perfect’. No one actively shamed Garmadon for having these thoughts (from what i know, though Wu definitely hasn’t) but he probably had more thoughts about how everyone must be mocking him. With the intrusive thoughts getting worse as he grew older, and as his responsibilities grew heavier, there were a few times where Garmadon’s morals and resolve wavered.

Now remember, Garmadon probably already was a grey character (light grey) without the venom strongly influencing him because of the world he grew up in as well as having horrific thoughts since young, which could lead to a sense on normalcy of the content of them. Which could’ve led him to his actions and overall personality being incredibly light grey. The times he wavered were few in between, and i can’t list them all off since i haven’t read the comics, but the most notable one was when he went to go train under Chen.

The reason he might’ve done so could be a few. Due to Chen’s evil nature, he might’ve thought that it might help him in easing and handling these thoughts better. Or it might’ve been a lapse in judgment, or his morals tipping slightly to the darker side.

After all these sort of moments where he almost tipped to the darker side, something just had to give and push him over the edge of finally breaking his already weak grip on his will power to resist against these thoughts, and whatever it was broke it well. He attempted to steal the golden weapons, Kill Wu, and unlock his Oni side, despite having a baby and a wife at the time. And thats not to say Garmadon doesn’t care for those three. He’s shown time and time again that he does. He cares for all three of them and loves them as family. Yet, that doesn’t stop the grip of his intrusive thoughts, nor the easing of suffering mentally once he stopped pushing it down. He’s shown he cares for Wu like how a brother would (like a little shi, though i would say that Garmadon is much more willing to kill Wu then the other two), and he’s shown interest in Misako as a lover (no, i will not forget that straight up grin of his) and how he hasn’t actively sought her out to harm her, and how he has held back against Lloyd, only ever grew and broke free of these thoughts and desires because of Lloyd, and only ever found his true self and freedom and acceptance because of Lloyd.

Garmdon is very much capable of capable of holding back his evil desires and wants when he is given the right reason too, and that reason has always been his family as his SON. His BABY. THATS HIS KID.

But, Garmadon may have special genes and magic powers, but his brain is like any other humans. He was no longer able to fully resist the venom in his veins nor the thoughts in his head as strongly as he used too, because he is no longer young. He is an old man whose whole life was spent resisting a side of him he was horrified at, yet a side of him who he would never be able to truly hide nor resist, when that terrifying demon in his head is still a part of him.

I would like to say though, that while the intrusive thoughts themselves were evil and horrible and straight up terrifying, Garmadon himself never was that kinda person. Theres a reason why Lloyd is his son and why Misako chose him, and why Wu still respects his brother so much. Garmadon is a good person, in a situation he cannot control and a brain he cannot stop. Intrusive thoughts are not things you willingly think, they’re like a stampede of people running up to the microphone to give their own bright ideas all at once, all of the time, and you’re the only audience they talk to. Garmadon was subjected to that since he was a child, and that isn’t easy. The fact that he lasted so long, so many decades, resisting against them and holding himself true to his ideals and true personality is mesmerising to witness and think about. And to think that he can still resist, and then understand and grow with that side of him into a healthier and happier person who is trying, is definitely something he and everyone he ever grew close too wished for, for a very long time.

[belovedmusings]

Sugar-coated, lies unfolded.

Choso Kamo x You x Suguru Geto

Explicit Themes 18+ (🚫Minors DNI🚫)

Part nine of the 'Two + One' story. Click for story masterlist.

Guitarist! Choso Kamo is your boyfriend, and he recently just found out that you have feelings for his bandmate, Suguru, and that Suguru reciprocates. He's allowing you to explore that with Suguru...but could you actually do that to him? Sleep with another man?

Relevant tags: sexual tension, thoughts of infidelity, characters with questionable morals, Choso is sweet and loyal, Suguru is charming and sexy, slow burn, no "y/n" for immersion, 2nd POV, reader has no defining characteristics, explicit smut, nipple play (male receiving), oral sex (fem receiving), bathroom sex, love bites, cunnilingus, fingering, squirting, handjob

Recommended songs to listen to while reading: Candy (Doja Cat), I Want It All (Cameron Grey), High Enough (K.Flay, RAC)

A/N: I think satan himself came over me when i wrote this chapter so...enjoy ;)

Read on Ao3 if you prefer!

Or read below cut:

The next morning had gone completely normally. You had woken up with Choso, shared your usual morning kiss, then got ready for the day beside him. You’d had breakfast, your normal conversations, and when he had to go to meet with the band, you had kissed him goodbye and exchanged your ‘I love you’s with him.

It’s when you’re going about your normal day just after you’ve had lunch that you receive a phone call.

Suguru. 

He’s never called you before. Choso should be with him–did something happen?

Hurriedly, you accept the call. “Hello?”

“Hey,” Suguru’s buttery voice comes through the speaker casually, and it disarms you from any immediate threats.

“Hey,” You reply, sitting back. “Is everything okay?”

“What, I can’t just call you?” Suguru chuckles on the other end, the sound rattling around inside of you like a marble in a glass jar. You hear a sigh. “Well, I did call you for a reason.”

“Yeah? What is it?”

“He told me about everything,” Suguru says, and your suspicions are confirmed. “He told me about that dream you had of me–which we’ll come back to–then the conversation you had afterwards. You told him all about us, it seems.”

You draw in a breath. “Yes, I-I did…”

“And he told me he wasn’t as upset as he thought he’d be. He felt a little uncomfortable, but then because it’s me, he said it didn’t bother him. Apparently the two of us showing restraint is what let him come to the conclusion to trust us…and let us explore things together.”

You’re worrying your lip so hard between your teeth as you listen that a layer of skin is peeling off. “Yeah…he…he did say that.”

“So…he’s given us his permission,” Suguru states slowly. “On his conditions, of course.”

You know what Suguru is getting at, but there’s just something inside of you reluctant to lean into it. Maybe it’s Choso’s reaction, his patience and unconditional love, or the way the two of you made love the night before. But guilt is killing you. 

“I…” You begin, “Suguru…I don’t think I can do it.”

A beat. Then, a sigh. “...it’s because you feel like you’re taking advantage of him, right?”

“Well, yes…it just doesn’t feel right. He said we could, but what kind of loving girlfriend sleeps with her boyfriend’s bandmate?”

“I understand,” replies Suguru, “I feel the same. It’s like exploiting his kindness, isn’t it?”

“Y-yeah, exactly…”

“So, we won’t, then.”

It sounds like a question, even though it’s a statement. “We shouldn’t.”

An unanswer. The two of you are pushing and pulling again.

“Hey, my smoke break is almost over, so I have to go back in. I’ll text you later.”

A part of you is disappointed when he says it. You don’t want to say goodbye yet. You like having him there on the phone.

“Okay,” You respond softly.

“Okay.” 

The call ends, and you put your head in your hands.

What on Earth is your life?

_

Nothing happens for the next four weeks. You don’t see him at all, but he does make it a point to call and text you consistently. Despite not acting on your desires, you grow closer with Suguru over text and phone calls, and if nothing else, he becomes a good friend of yours. 

You and Choso have no issues, and life continues on. You don’t sleep with Suguru, you force yourself not to think of him in any sort of sexual way, and you make peace with it.

Everything is fine up until the release party for the album they had been working on, and recently just completed.

You got done up in makeup, styled your hair, put on a dress suited for the occasion, and went with Choso to Suguru’s place where he’s holding it.

On the way there, you tell yourself nothing will happen. You haven’t reached out to him, asking to see him, you haven’t had another dream, and your thoughts of him have remained innocent. You have your mind in order.

All of that goes to hell immediately when you lay your gaze on Suguru, the moment after you set foot in the house.

He’s there in black jeans and an equally black tank-top, sinfully tight and leaving nothing to the imagination. It’s like he wore that just to remind you of everything that you’ve been lusting after; his bulging muscles, the piercings adorning the centers of his two pecs, the tattoos undulating over his pale skin…and that’s just his body. His face…god, his face.

His inky midnight hair falls in thick tresses down his shoulders, framing a face painters would vy for. Piercings and thick liner rimming his eyes, he’s the closest thing to a rock god you have ever seen.

“Hey,” He greets you, and you think maybe he’s already said ‘hello’ to Choso but you aren’t sure. You muster up a smile, trying your best to salvage your resolve.

“Hi.”

His gaze lingers on you for a moment as Choso moves in to set his guitar up with the rest of the band’s cozy set-up in Suguru’s spacious living room.

“You look breathtaking,” He tells you, a softness in his eyes that only serves to complicate you. 

“So do you,” You say, gesturing to him. He just shrugs, and it seems like his golden gaze pierces through you. You both know what you decided on, but right now the air between you is electric.

All it takes is a glance at the opposite corner of the living room to see Choso’s eyes on you, and you suddenly feel as if you’ve been caught doing something wrong. You flit your gaze back to Suguru for a second, apologetic, before making your way into the house.

After that, it’s sweet, sweet torture. 

You feel like you’re on high alert the entire soundcheck. You participate as well as you can in assisting with providing the audience perspective, but you’re so focused on acting normal that you can barely remember anything. 

The same goes for the actual release performance. You’d greeted all of Choso’s brothers when they’d arrived, then found your seat at the front of the small folding-chair arrangement, and then fought your way through normal reactions to each song.

You’d heard them all before, as Choso had both played them for you on his phone and practiced them with his guitar, but watching them all put together live with mood lighting, the band all dressed-up…it’s electric.

Between Choso and Suguru, your eyes are feasting. Two gorgeous men, performing, letting their lined gazes gravitate towards you, twin spotlights.

When the set finishes, the after party starts, and you stand up, Choso welcoming you into his arms and giving you a deep kiss as Larue begins to spin the first round of music. 

“You did amazing,” You tell your boyfriend, smiling up at him. “This album is gonna be so successful.”

He smiles down at you, leaning in to press another kiss to your lips. “You’ve supported me this whole time. I’m so grateful to you.”

Your hand moves to cup his cheek, and you sigh appreciatively. His chocolate locks pulled up into his signature spiky buns, eyes smoked out with purple and lined with unique markings that touch his nose bridge tattoo, the gentle tenderness in his stare…you just adore him.

“You’re precious to me,” You tell him, speaking from the heart, and you can see the light inside of him brighten a bit.

“I love you.”

He gets your heart to pound even now. “I love you too.”

“Choso!”

The sound of his youngest brother’s voice calling out to him pulls you two out of your little bubble, and you turn to see Yuji walking towards you, his other brothers in tow. 

“That was awesome, man!” Yuji says, clapping him on the back. “You gotta introduce us to the band!”

Choso looks at you, unsure to leave you alone at a party full of strangers. You know how important his brothers are to him, so you simply shake your head with a smile. “Go ahead. I’ll be fine, baby.”

He gives you a thankful grin, kissing your cheek before leading the mob of his brothers off to Larue first since he’s the closest.

Bass heavy music fills the mood-lit space of his living room, music executives, other artists, models, whoever Suguru and the rest of the band know fill it with their intoxicated, sweaty bodies. You move to the bar of Suguru’s kitchen, overlooking the living room, deciding to fix yourself a drink to pass the time.

You’ve drunk exactly half of your solo cup when it happens.

Your eyes are dusting over the crowd uninterestedly until they catch on a familiar frame.

Suguru. He’s talking with a woman, a slender, tall figure that must be a model he knows somehow. His hand is on the wall beside her, leaning over her, a loose grin on her flawless face–and immediately an unbridled jealousy wells up inside of you without your permission.

As soon as the sharp negativity registers, Suguru chooses that exact moment to find your gaze with his own. The charming smile he had on his face fades, and you don’t know why, but you feel enraged.

It’s a muddy, red feeling, completely unfounded, shame tinging it dark. But it’s yours, and the longer you stare at him the heavier it feels.

Unable to look at him with another woman any longer, you turn on your heel and head straight for the only place you know you can be alone in this big house–the bathroom.

You’ve just pushed the door open to the empty room when you hear him call to you.

You whirl around, and that’s when he backs you in, shutting the door behind you. The only light in the small room is reflecting from the frosted window at the other end, streetlight outside and the Moon casting a dim glow.

“You’re upset,” Suguru says, hand on your cheek. You avert your eyes, pushing his hand off of you.

“You’re not mine, I have no right to be,” it comes out cold and uneven. “Go back, she’s probably wondering where you went.”

“Forget her, I don’t want her,” He forces your gaze back to him. “I want you.”

The dense air is ripe with stillness. You can’t even hear the loud music outside anymore. Your eyes are locked with Suguru’s, and you know you’re screwed.

He pulls you in and ducks down, beginning to leave feverish kisses over your neck.

“I want you so fucking much,” He breathes, heat fanning over your skin and making you shiver. He looks up at you and leans in real close, the tips of your noses touching. “It’s taking everything in my power not to kiss you right now.”

Involuntarily, your eyes flit down to his lips, and he exhales shakily, closing his eyes and brushing them faintly against yours. You turn your face away.

“We can’t.”

He makes a noise in the back of his throat and tightens his hold on you, dragging his teeth over the skin just under your ear. 

“I know we said we wouldn’t,” He replies, “But I can’t do it, I can’t resist you knowing that I can have you like this…”

“I don’t want to hurt him. I love him.” Your resolve is wavering.

“I know,” Suguru murmurs, “He knows, too. Just let yourself have this. Let me do this.”

You swallow hard, a sigh leaving your lips as he trails wet kisses down to your collarbone. 

“Let me,” He says, “You want this. You want me.”

You lean back against the counter, hands on the edge as he keeps going further down, this time undeterred by your dress and its neckline.

His lips find the top of your breast, and he looks up at you.

“Tell me to stop.”

Those words can’t even begin to take form on your tongue.

This time, he repeats it in a whisper. “Tell me to stop.”

Fuck it. You can’t stand this anymore.

“No.”

“Then I won’t.”

He pushes the top of your dress unimportantly out of the way, exposing the rest of the soft flesh of your chest. 

He eyes your breasts with desire before looking up at you, making sure you’re watching him before parting his lips and swiping his tongue out, letting the bead of his piercing catch on your stiff peak. 

You gasp, and his lips turn up at the corners. Then he does it again. His thumb rubs the one not getting worked by his mouth, and you watch as he flutters his tongue over the bud, closing his lips around it and sucking.

“Ah,” You moan, head falling back. “Suguru…”

“Yes,” He breathes, “I’ve waited so long to hear that, fuck, you are so beautiful.”

You bite your lip as he praises you, arching your back as he continues to devour you. It’s a sinful scene, something so hazy you feel like if you move a certain way you’ll wake from a dream. The little shocks of pleasure undulating down from your peaks start to build heat in your core, wetness pooling in the lace underneath the skirt of your dress.

The bumping of the music outside of the bathroom only adds to the heavy atmosphere, so loud it vibrates the counter behind you, and you have to actually take a moment to realize that Suguru’s lips have started traveling further down your body. Right over the fabric of your dress, he kisses a line as he gets to his knees, leveling himself with your thighs. He looks up at you with those pretty, golden eyes, a translucent midnight in the dim lighting of the moon, rimmed with eyeliner, and he presses a peck to your knee, palms caressing the skin at the hem of your dress.

You can only watch him do it, watch him start littering your skin with kisses, taking your left leg and hiking it over his shoulder to get further up your thighs.

Each brush of his metal-adorned lips has you moving closer to insanity. Little flowers of pleasure bloom every time he sucks a mark and pulls away, the skin tenderized and wet with saliva. The feeling of his hot mouth getting closer and closer to the spot that hungers the most for him intensifies, and soon enough, he pushes your dress up far enough to get it around your hips and out of his way. Panties on display, he locks eyes with you and rubs the skin of your inner thigh slowly, pressing his lips to the dip right beside your apex. You tense, and he grins, flicking his tongue out to run it over the skin there. 

“I’ve wanted to do this for so long,” He murmurs, eyes flitting down, then up again. “Right here is where I want to be…”

You swear your heart may give out. You’ve fantasized so much about this moment, and now that it’s happening, you don’t know what to do with yourself. You’re sure any second you’re going to combust. 

“I wish you could see your face,” He grins, looking at you with an amused smile. “You want it bad…”

Taking a breath, you try to get a grip to respond. The best you can manage is, “I’m not the only one.”

He chuckles low in his throat, syrupy and rich, and then parts his lips to drag his tongue over the front of your panties.

“Ah!” You gasp, the unexpected movement catching you by surprise. All Suguru does is do it again, this time drawing circles into the fabric with the stud in his tongue, your clothed clit throbbing in delight.

He closes his lips around it, sucking before tilting his head down, rubbing the tip of his nose against the bud.

You shiver, a hand threading into his hair. “Suguru…”

“Keep making those noises for me,” He breathes, kissing the front of your panties a few times, then swirling his tongue around your clothed pearl again. The added friction of the fabric heightens your pleasure, and you feel it getting soaked, a combination of your arousal and his spit. The thought alone furthers your desire.

He adds more pressure on his next lick, and it has you twitching, a soft whimper leaving your lips. He repeats the movement over and over and over again until your breath is hitched and uneven, little moans tumbling freely from your voice.

“Suguru,” You finally warn, “I’m gonna cum…”

“Cum,” He replies, “Cum on my tongue, baby.”

“Ah!” You cry out, the pet name hitting your senses right in their vital points, orgasm sweeping through you like a vengeful spirit claiming its latest victim. He helps you ride it out, keeping his tongue on you until your body begins to relax.

“You’re gorgeous when you cum,” He compliments breathlessly, and you huff in embarrassment. 

“Am I really?”

“Yeah,” He nods, gazing at you with blown pupils. “I want to see it again.”

Faster than you can comprehend, he’s hooking your sopping panties out of the way, taking your bare cunt into his mouth.

The sensitivity overwhelms you and you gasp, biting your lip. “Suguru…I-I already came…”

“You can do it again,” He replies, flicking his tongue over the swollen bud at the top of your folds. “Come on, just focus on the feeling…”

It’s a dull yet sharp sort of pain, a kind you discover you like, and you moan as he relentlessly pursues your pleasure, squirming in the vice grip he has on your hips, no doubt destined to bruise. The thought of the shape of his hands branded into your skin tomorrow, ingrained in a phantom ache…it makes your core pulse with need.

He groans, dragging his right hand down your leg, the cool, hard sensation of his rings making you suck your lip between your teeth. 

Then, you feel two thick, rough fingers entering you, jewelry and all.

“Oh god,” it comes out desperate and sort of broken, because Suguru is fingering you now, using the beautiful hand he strokes his bass guitar with, and for fuck’s sake he really knows how to use them.

He’s folded the three fingers he’s not using to aim better with the two inside, curling them upwards to prod at the magic spot within you as he sucks hard on your clit.

Your head falls back and you suppress what would have been a pornstar-worthy cry, yet your effort is wasted when on the next thrust of his digits, the sound of your ecstasy is forced out of you as he wriggles his fingers slightly on your g-spot.

“Suguru!”

“Beautiful,” He breathes against your folds, eyes still trained on you as if he was a spectator beholding an art exhibit. 

When he says it, it clatters around inside of you like a china plate shattering on a kitchen floor. He must know what it does to you, because he dives right back in, eating you out like his life depends on it, complete with noises generated at the back of his throat like a starved man finally allowed food.

All too soon, as he’d predicted, your second orgasm approaches. It fades in like the start of your favorite Curse Manipulator song, building, building, building—

Something that has never happened before happens.

You feel this release of pressure, an overwhelming rush of heat, the sound of your own wanton scream sounding far away as you soak Suguru’s fingers and chin. He made you squirt. For the first time in your life.

You can barely remember where you are by the time he stands up, licking your juices off of his rings and wrapping his arm back around your waist to get close to you.

Like this, you feel the press of his hard cock straining against his jeans on your thigh and you shiver, meeting his eyes. 

“Did you like that?” He asks in a sort of whisper, and you nod mindlessly, leaning forward to kiss him.

Then you remember yourself and the rules, and pull away. He makes a disappointed noise and cups your face with his left hand.

“I wish you could taste yourself on my tongue,” He whispers, touching his nose to yours. “I want to kiss you so badly right now.”

Your eyes meet his, and though you just came twice, you still feel a raging fire inside of you for him. 

You don’t answer verbally; you just tilt your head to the side and lay a kiss on his cheek. He sighs, eyes fluttering shut, and you get more bold, kissing a line all the way down his neck. Your hands travel from his shoulders down his chest, over the taut fabric of his black tank top, ghosting over the piercings on each of his pecs on their way down.

You make it to the edge of his shirt and you suddenly become all-too-aware of the fact that you get to touch him. You get to do whatever the fuck you want to him, after all of these months of dreaming about it, he’s finally putty in your hands.

Like a kid in a candy store, your lips latch onto his neck as you push his shirt up, only pulling back to help him take it off and toss it unimportantly to the floor. Your eyes feast on his bare, muscular torso, pale skin seeming to glow in the lavender moonlight. The tattoos on his skin decorate him beautifully, and your vision catches on the twin silver barbels in each of his nipples, mouth salivating. It only worsens when you see the bulge in his black jeans, fiending for release. 

How is he this gorgeous?

“Keep looking at me like that and I’m not gonna obey the rules,” He warns softly, hands on your waist, and you meet his eyes, dangerously close to wanting to break them yourself. 

“You’re just…” You trail off, laying a hand on his chest and running it down slowly, watching his breath hitch. “God you’re just…”

He smiles slightly, amused, and you just shake your head and lean forward, mouth landing on his collarbone.

Your lips busy sucking marks into his chest, your hands need something new to touch, so you find the buckle of his belt, starting to tug on it.

You can feel the uptick in his heart rate because it’s beating right beneath your kiss, and the knowledge that you’re affecting him so much goes straight to your head.

His hands have moved up to your breasts, kneading them gently as you work his pants open, satisfaction filling you the second you feel the button release.

In search of what you yearn for, you drag the zipper down and dip your hand underneath the waistband of his boxers, at last coming into contact with the smooth, hard heat of his cock. He gasps, breath fluttering, and the moment you wrap your hand around it and pull it free from the confines of his clothing, he groans. It’s music to your ears.

The touches he’s been giving to you intensify as you begin to stroke him, his shaft thick and lengthy in your grasp. 

Except for the small amount of precum you spread down his length, there’s nothing to help the glide, but he remedies that by canting his hips forward and raising your knee, cock bumping against your soaked mound. You jolt, thinking he means to slip inside, and he shakes his head.

“I don’t have condoms,” He murmurs, “But you can still get me wet.”

A slight tinge of disappointment fills you—there won’t be that final push tonight, but you’re here and you’re so turned on you can’t think straight, so you do as he says and rub his tip against your folds.

“Oh, fuck,” He breathes out, head falling back. He inhales sharply, starting to rock his hips to rut against you. “Fuck, you feel so soft…”

Your composure utterly gives out beneath you and you fall forward, letting your forehead rest against his chest as he continues fucking against your clit. It’s over-sensitive and puffy, but god damn is it determined to keep up?

Unable to help yourself, you drag your teeth over one of his tattoos, and he grunts, hand winding behind your waist to pull you closer. Spurred on and suddenly level with his pec, you part your lips and allow your tongue to swipe over the pierced nipple beneath it, and he shudders.

“Fuck, baby.”

If he keeps calling you that, you’re going to need to be admitted. 

Of course, it only impassions you, and your strokes quicken, hand tightening every time you get to the tip and loosening on the way down. 

“Yes,” He sighs out, taking your face in his hand and guiding it up. He looks at you in the eyes for a second, then moves in, planting a kiss left of your mouth. Your eyes close, and he keeps going, giving you desperate pecks as he keeps fucking your hand, getting himself sloppy with your essence, precum mixing in with it. 

His mouth finds your ear and he bites at the shell, low groans sending vibrations down your spine. 

“I wanna fuck you,” He sounds winded in a way you’ve never heard before, strained, and it’s so fucking sexy. “I wanna be inside of you so badly…I wanna feel every detail.”

“Oh god,” You shudder, eyes squeezing shut, feeling lightheaded.

“If I could, I’d grab you and turn you around,” He tells you, “I’d make you take it all until you’re stuffed with my cum.”

Jesus Christ, that’s the dirtiest thing anyone has ever said to you. Your body trembles involuntarily, clenching on nothing, and you pull him closer, wrapping your legs around his hips. All you can do now is hold his cock down while he ruts against you, friction mutually beneficial, completely losing your mind. 

“Would you like that?” He asks, voice sultry like brown sugar, sweet and bad for you. 

Still, you nod, long gone, clutching onto him for dear life. “Yes…”

“Yes? Yes, who?” He asks, a dangerous little tinge in his voice, “Who is it that you want to get fucked by right now?”

Fuck, “You…”

His thrusts are turning erratic and you can feel him getting close, muscles tensing up, urgency increasing.

“What’s my name?” He asks you, a soft demand.

Oh god, “Suguru.”

“That’s right,” He murmurs, hissing as he teeters over the edge. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum, baby…”

As if commanded by him, your body seizes up and your third orgasm of the night hits you, nails digging into his shoulder. That’s all it takes for him to follow—he seethes air through his teeth, voice catching in a guttural grunt, and you feel hot semen spilling onto the tender flesh of your mound, staining the fabric of your ruined panties. 

“God,” He breathes, trying to calm down, eyes unfocused. 

They land on your face, and all he does is look at you for a moment before leaning in, kissing your forehead. 

“I won’t see anyone else,” He murmurs to you, firm and breathless.

You shake your head automatically. “I didn’t ask you to do that.”

“I know.”

Such a violent tenderness erupts inside of you, endorphins and oxytocin swirling around like a hurricane, making a mess of your psyche. He really doesn’t want anyone but you, and that knowledge is sharp like a knife. Despite the danger of it, you don’t want to leave.

If Suguru’s desire for you is destined to swallow you whole, you are royally fucked.

__

a/n: the way my fingers flew writing this

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[newx-menfan]

Laura Kinney isn’t the “Goodie Two Shoes” fans make her out to be…and other thoughts… 

Part 1: “The CRINGE”

Let’s be honest- we all KNEW I would eventually get here…after doing write-ups on Surge, Hellion, AND Prodigy…since X-23 is one of my all time favorite characters…

If there is one thing that drives me totally NUTS about X-23 fandom though (and fandoms, in general)… it is this weird fan attitude that Laura Kinney…aka “X-23”…aka “Wolverine”… can essentially “Do No Wrong”��.

She’s the “BETTER” Wolverine. The less “TOXIC” version. The PERFECT Wolverine.

You see it in comic clickbait articles ALL the time- Laura is, essentially, the PERFECT answer to all the problems of the original character….

If you happen to mention ANY sort of criticism against X-23, textually or just about the character ingeneral - “She’s a bad friend”… “She can be kind of selfish”… “she is objectively a derivative character that is based off of a more popular X-Men”…people will look at you like you just kicked their puppy or said something really cruel…

And what’s interesting to me about all of this is… X-Men is KIND OF a book essentially about very flawed people, all trying to survive. That was, after all, Marvel’s WHOLE sell for years- they had the “relatable”, “real” characters…. where DC comics had “Gods”.

You would think, with characters EATING another planet, living out problematic “antebellum” Dark Phoenix fantasies, having psychic affairs, saying the “N-word” repeatedly, starting out as villains… it’s kind of accepted that ALL OF THE OTHER X-MEN have made terrible choices at some point or have been written BADLY….

Yet if you go on X-Men twitter… you will regularly see fans yelling that Jean Grey “is the most powerful X-Men” ever, Gambit or Logan are just these perfect “girl-dad’s”, or Storm can essentially NEVER be wrong…

And the PROBLEM with this is…it’s made writing these characters ALMOST LOGISTICALLY IMPOSSIBLE…

When Jean, for example, is at GOD LEVELS and ALWAYS morally right… what can you feasibly DO with her character anymore? If you create a villain to match her insane power levels… fans will be upset and complain that the fight wasn’t “fair” and inevitably pull up some vague comic panel to argue just why Jean really should have won …If a writer decides to de-power her OR makes her go evil, fans often will inevitably view it as sexist… so how can you write Jean Grey as still relatable? 

New relationships or Scott Summers dying?- Fans often get upset when writers break up the iconic Scott/Jean or Logan/Jean ships…or accuse writers of romanticizing toxic relationships…

Put her in a teaching/mentor/Headmaster role?- we saw what happened when writers tried it with Kitty, Storm, and Logan…they just became pretty boring….

Often writers solution seems to be… just killing Jean off…

This isn’t to shoot down criticisms like “Women in the Refrigerator Syndrome”, “plot armor”, ect…but I do think it’s important to talk about how… possibly… fandom has gone too far the other way… that fandom is basically guaranteeing characters will inevitably become obsolete or unusable… or cause writers to inevitably just repeat the same five stories for nostalgia sake, because they can’t do anything “new”…

This isn’t JUST female characters either- I would say characters like Gambit, Wolverine, Cyclops, Batman, and several others have pretty much the same logistical problem…they’ve been hyped up SO MUCH…that you can’t really DO ANYTHING with them anymore, for fear of angering their large fanbases….

Laura has relatively quickly developed this problem, and it seems like the shelf life of comic book characters is burning out quicker and quicker…

What is it about Laura, that makes her immune to any real criticism within her fan base, in a comic book series where it’s kind of accepted that every character is in some way…horribly flawed?

I am going to go through in these posts talking about why Laura really isn’t the perfect character readers constantly make her out to be… that she actually IS pretty similar TO Logan and a lot of the complaints against him CAN be tied to her as well… and that the biggest problem currently facing Laura AND COMICS in general right now, I would argue, is that writers are not able to admit that Laura or any of the other characters ARE sometimes wrong…or to quote Kitty Pryde…sometimes kind of a “jerk”…

———————————————————————

Part of the reason no one criticizes Laura, is because of her tremendously tragic backstory.

Essentially a modern version of “Frankenstein”; Laura is created to be a replication of the “Weapon X” experiment in miniseries “Innocence Lost”. (I know people tend to focus more on the “Pinocchio” allusions from the book, but I find the  “Frankenstein” allusions more relevant…)

Sarah Kinney opts into this program, because, like Victor Frankenstein: she desires scientific exploration without ethical scrutiny. 

Focused more on pushing the realms of scientific discovery instead of considering the consequences, Sarah manages to create a viable clone, with the caveat that it is female, because the “Y” gene from the sample is too damaged. It’s only when Rice, another scientist with a Wolverine-vendetta, forces Sarah to be a surrogate to Laura as punishment for her insubordination, that the ethical considerations truly start to come into play for Sarah…

Laura experiences extreme torture, radiation poisoning to activate her mutant powers, coating her claws without anesthetic, creation of the trigger scent (a pavlovian odor that causes her to black out and go berserk), forcing her to kill her Sensei and other targets (and her puppy, according to Liu…), and many other horrors while there.

Sarah, after seeing Laura’s potential for good after Laura spares Rice’s illegitimate kid from being murdered and Laura helping  track down Sarah’s kidnapped niece; tries to free Laura and destroy the facility…

Which leads to Rice coating Sarah with the trigger scent and having Laura murder her.

While Laura DOES manage to escape…she now has to live with the fact that she killed her own mother for the rest of her life…

This is pretty much the bare bones summary (I ignored Sarah’s own history of childhood trauma and abuse and the Rice subplots)….

Laura then goes to track down Sarah’s relatives in “Target X”, bonding with Megan, the angsty traumatized niece that had been kidnapped previously and develops her first real human connection.

It’s hard NOT to like Kyle’s adorable version of Laura; watching her riding on roller coasters with Megan, peeping in on people in windows, accidentally getting Megan into trouble by mimicking teachers, hanging out at the boardwalks in San Fran…. Laura is socially inept…but in a relatable way…

Things go to hell however, when it’s discovered that Debbie’s boyfriend is actually a facility agent and spying on them…

Laura fights the Sabertooth-like Kimura, saves Debbie and Megan, helps them go into hiding, and then attacks Logan with the plan to kill them both…only to get captured by Shield….and then is freed by Captain America…

Again a bare bones summary and nothing to really criticize, since Laura has little engagement with people in these situations and is the victim, despite doing some really horrible things. It’s a pretty reasonable storyline and it is, again, a modern comic retelling of “Frankenstein”…similar to “the Incredible Hulk”….

Laura is the monster of modern science, desperately seeking the answers of what it means to be human…

Sure…she kind of/sort of tries to kill Logan…but it’s understandable considering the situation…(and it’s not like Logan doesn’t have a history of trying to kill his own family members in comics…)

“NYX”…good and bad…is kind of the story that PUSHES the TRAUMA NARRATIVE to a ridiculous degree…

I get why on multiple levels…people, including Craig Kyle himself (writer of “Innocence Lost” AND ”Target X”) …HATE NYX.

And truthfully… I personally remember rolling my eyes, the first time I heard about it when it came out…

“NYX”, written by Editor Joe Quesada, was the first introduction of Laura, and technically came out BEFORE “Innocence Lost”/“Target X” but after Laura’s appearance on the tv show “X-Men Evolution”. Canonically…it’s a little more challenging but most fans AGREE NYX comes AFTER “Target X”….

Laura is in NYC and being trafficked by Zebra Daddy (yes…that IS HIS NAME IN THE BOOK…); becoming mute and withdrawn. 

When a john kills himself she meets another mutant, Kiden Nixon, and joins a ragtag group of homeless mutants…there’s a whole subplot about Kiden’s dead dad…Zebra Daddy comes after Laura and she kills him to save her friends…

In the end, Laura abandons her friends (because Laura has to be a “lone wolf”); but bumps into them years later after joining the X-Men…

While I will fully admit there are parts of Laura’s story that ARE handled pretty well…there’s also A LOT of voyeuristic panty shots in the art….a ridiculous amount of hand waving…and constant over-theatrics…

———————————————————————

Laura really is that character that teeters on an edge of cringe….

“Female Clone of Wolverine”- admittedly sounds cringeworthy to a non-comic book reader… (and people who remember HOW BAD “the Clone Saga” was…)

“Dating and obsessed with a ‘Draco Malfoy-esque’ sorta toxic copy of Jean Grey”- soundscringeworthy…right?

“Tortured weapon who is forced to become a teenage sex worker out on the streets of NYC and is goth and self harms…”- 100% sounds like an over the top show on CW….

I DO OBJECTIVELY GET why, when Laura first popped up into comics, a lot of male Wolverine fans saw her as just this “edgy CW-like attempt at new readership”… (technically she was CREATED on Warner Brothers “X-Men Evo”…so that’s not totally an inaccurate summary either…)

A teenage Wolverine…with boobs…

Hell…the director of “Logan”, James Mangold, didn’t want to feature her as a teenager…because he thought it sounded like a “CW show”….

“NYX” did feel like something out of a Frank Miller, “Batman: Year One” hallucination. That’s not to say it’s a BAD comic…but it definitely reflects the era of the 2000’s where everything had to be “gritty”….female characters were all heavily sexualized…it was at a time where “Skins”, “Misfits”, and “Gossip Girl” hyped up underage teenagers doing drugs, partying, and having risky sex….

One of the covers of “NYX” literally features Kiden with a pacifier…heavily hinting at “rave culture” and “ecstasy” usage…

I know a lot of modern readers take offense to this book and Quesada…but I do see the other side of it. A big part of Millennial early counter culture WAS indie sleeze….it WAS very hedonistic…it did fit the time period it was created….

“NYX” is a as much of a product of Millennial culture as “Academy X”, “the Ultimate verse”, or Grant Morrison’s “New X-Men” was… it was the same as how “Generation X” or “Jim Lee’s X-Men” was for the 90’s…how all of Claremont’s “Uncanny” and the spinoff books were products of the 80’s culture…and how Kirby’s “X-Men” was for the 60’s…ectera, ecetera…

And the common trend with all of them? They all have some PRETTY CRINGY MOMENTS.

I’m 100% sure, in ten or twenty years, we will look back and criticize how this era of comics incorporated embarrassing parts of youth culture…or writing styles…or counter culture…

But at the same time…her backstory… DOES start to feel a bit ridiculous. It does start to feel like this manufactured, over the top modern “Oliver Twist” or “Great Expectations” to get fans to essentially accept and sympathize with this fairly new character…Like someone just took a bunch of random origin stories and dumped them together in blender, to make the ultimate “SAD” character…

Is Laura really ALL that different from ridiculous characters like Adam the X-treme? Or Birdbrain? the lost Summer brother…Vulcan?

Yet we don’t take any of those characters overly seriously…

It’s moments like watching fans debate whether it’s right or wrong to use the Codename “X-23” for example, screaming at fans who are fine with it because they realize she’s ultimately a fictional character and Marvel on some level needs “brand recognition”…that even if her backstory does deal with real topics and issues…. do you remember that Laura’s backstory is pretty comicbook-y and absurd. 

As “cringy” as Laura SOUNDS on PAPER…she works because the writing ultimately did what it was supposed to do. Laura has objectively some of the BEST MODERN COMICS and even books like NYX, are pretty decently written, even if the subject matter and handling and culture are outdated from it.

Laura IS a great character…but she’s also kind of on edge of “cringy”…

And where we can kind of ACCEPT that cringe with Logan and his weird nose-less era…or Gambit referring to himself in third person… or pretty much EVERYTHING about Kitty (ninja…pirate…teenage prodigy…weird waifu for literally every male writer); Laura is this one character that you can’t criticize…or if you DO, it has to be solely around the sexualization of the character…and not the character itself…

I do understand fans getting attached to certain characters…in seeing their OWN trauma represented IN the character and reflected back…but at some point…I do think you have to see the humor of it all too…

That Laura isn’t ALL that DIFFERENT from other products of their time- like clone Superboy…FantomeX…Quentin Quire….Bloodstorm…Maggott…Adam the X-treme…

She just had better writing.

[brillantradiance]

This is me just talking to the void but I can’t help but to imagine the version of solo leveling where there’s significant internal conflict. For example Jin Woo literally losing emotions every time he gets stronger. Like I wished the story took the time to actually delve into how that would affect him and the people around him.

Starting with the people around him I think Jin Woo would overall be apathetic in nature and as the story progresses values human life (other than his own and his family) less and less to point where if Jin Woo had a choice to either spare/save a group of people but not get exp or kill/ let them die to get stronger (kill boss/monster etc.) he chooses the latter without a single thought . And you see this in the demon king raid with Esil but I feel like he kinda gets away with it because they’re demons in a gate. No one is there to call him out on it. And he uses the logic oh if I was weak they would’ve done the same which is true but If the story changed where it was out in the open whether it be a raid with another guild or a dungeon break it gives Jin Woo a moral dilemma that tackles how he’s losing his humanity because now he’s dealing with people. I feel like Jin Woo would most likely still choose to get stronger like he’ll try to do both but if it means some hunters/civilians have to die to get the job done so be it. And by doing so, the public and maybe even his own guild members find him to be a bit more monstrous. Which Jin Woo wouldn’t care until that fear hits his family.

Jin Woo’s Family:

Imagine after that hypothetical scene Jin Woo comes home to greet Jin-ah just for her step back in fear because she was watching the entire broadcast after school and while watching Jin Woo brutally kill those monsters and maybe kill some people just to get to those beasts faster she’s reminded of the orcs that came to her school and just shuts down. I think it feeds into the tragedy where Jin Woo wanted to get stronger partly to support his Family just for his family to be afraid of him and his power. And Imagine after this Jin Woo waits for the feeling of devastation, the hurt, the pain to wash over him just to feel nothing. He feels empty. Out of habit, he reaches for her and Jin ah skitters to her room. Jin Woo stands there feeling completely hollow. And as if he’s a zombie leaves the apartment to look for another gate just to feel something.

And in terms of his mother: I think after he wakes her up his mother does not recognize him at all. (Like I know it’s been four years but Jin Woo would’ve been 20 and most likely would’ve stopped growing his appearance would not be able to change that drastically) She panics : yelling who are you and Jin Woo does his best to calm her down. Then she looks into his eyes seeing how cold and lifeless they are and states you aren’t my son. My son was full of life. You reek of death. And maybe it’s not until Jin-Ah comes and explains that is in fact Jin Woo she finally accepts him. Also headcannon since Jin Woo serves as a vessel to the shadow monarch as he gets stronger his body temperature decreases due basically being the lord of the dead. Jin woo’s mom goes to embrace him just to realize he’s cold as a corpse. And the panel you see is his mom’s eyes completely overcome by fear and concern.

I think moments like this would make his choice to side with humanity so much more potent. maybe if he could never be ‘human’ like he once was he could use terrifying power to protect them regardless. OR push him to join the monarchs in the end because there’s nothing left for him on Earth. (Hero to Villain Jin Woo would’ve been so iconic like I can go into heavy detail)

Side note: another thing I will say is that story really does go out of its way to make Jin Woo never in the wrong for killing anyone which I can’t stand if he’s going to be morally grey commit to the bit. Let other characters not like him don’t just make them cartoonishly evil and then kill them off. OR let Jin Woo kill them off without cartoony evil antics and use that to reflect on Jin Woo as a character. Again it shows how he’s losing his humanity. Like the most egregious example was the Thomas Andre fight. They had to throw in im going to kill this bastard because he hurt my ego line just so Jin Woo can beat the shit outta of him. Like seriously, aside from that Thomas was literally just doing his job.

This was completely unedited and first time doing something like this. But if you made it to the end of this rant. Thank you. I have become deranged because of the potential of what Solo leveling could’ve been. Let me know if y’all want more rants. I could go on for days.

[queerespresso]

🎳 #Bison Thoughts 💭

🌙 My own perspective, it’s all good if you don’t agree. I’m less focused on morality. I’ve accepted they’re grey.

🎬 TheHeartKillersEp4

🎳 Khaotung as Bison

⚖️ I live for dichotomy and love that First and Khaotung keep serving me that. Cute face, 💅🏻 aesthetic, fluttery lashes and big eyes 🥺 with a savage bite. I’m sorry, I was vibing with the side of him that’s like “f*ck with me 🔪” . I strive for chill vibes now but deep, deep down within me this resonates. Especially if family or loved ones are involved.

❣️ Last episode Bison was feeling him. This episode, he took his brother’s words to heart. He *wants* to trust Kant even though deep down he knows something is off. He picks up on the smallest details and isn’t noticing Kant’s ��� faces? One perspective, he feels something is off and is just operating like everyone who wants to make a relationship work and is avoiding the signs. To some extent, he’s decided to take Kant at his word. He asked him bluntly multiple times and when Kant clearly told him there’s nothing else to tell him, Bison could only accept that. But there is a part of me that perceives that Bison doesn’t and can’t fully trust him after his brother revealed that information. So they’re both now *in the know* and playing with each other for information BUT feelings and some genuineness are mixing in. I don’t fully align with that thought though as Bison’s reaction to James felt like genuine jealousy or protectiveness (not 100% sure how he perceived the situation as he came at a strange time). He seemed to feel somewhat mollified after hearing Kant’s back story. Additionally, why go to those lengths to help Babe? That seemed more aligned with Bison’s potential sense of doing the right thing. I’m open to multiple potential paths with these characters though…so curious which way the show will go.

🥊 I thought it was interesting how *quick* Bison was to get angry and call out the janitor on his grooming. He went 10 boots down and was like, nope this will not fly. But that swiftness and speech made me think if he hasn’t experienced it himself (he actively is with his adoptive mother just not sure his awareness) then he may have some sense of justice. So, these threats of killing, is there actually heat behind it? Has he ever killed anyone who wasn’t assigned to him and he didn’t review prior a dr*g smuggler, pedof*le, hum*n trafficker, etc.? Fadel even said to him “don’t say things you won’t do” after Bison said “just kill him”. I wonder if *he thinks* he is a vigilante. I’ve accepted him as grey so I started the show thinking he may have a different set of values based on his upbringing but some things make me wonder if he’s a bark not bite person. Curious to see when he’s faced with a less clear target.

🎨 Bison getting that focused with Kant while tattooing and designing that pin 👌 I’m just imagining Kant and Bison as a tattoo artist couple. I’d be curious what Bison’s art style would be. While Kant has more of a Black and Grey style, I could see Bison doing New School or Water Color maybe? Their tattoo studio could be called… 🐝 Killer Bee…

I’d go to this studio just to watch the two interact. Writing their pickup lines for each other down 📝

[jenyifer]

Only Friends in Brain Soup

If you have seen my posts before you’ll probably recognize I use the term brain soup a lot. To me they are posts about my random questions I have while thinking about only friends. And I hope they feed your brain with new ideas about things. I’ve compared contrasted every character to Boston because he lives in my heart uwu. But I’ve realized something from making many many brain soups.

All of the Only Friends characters are alone. In their own minds each one is lonely this drives each of them to the point of desperation and moral grey.

Mew the intellectual desire to be in a relationship with Top. I think it was really telling when Mew said he should like ray he’s always been there. Very objective. Mew tried to think about Top in this way when they got together. Mew feels disconnected from his friends above them. He thinks he knows everything about them and they can’t understand him. He’s not gullible like he told Boston. He was always fearing the worst. Because he’s alone in his own mind on his pedestal and when he met Top join him there Mew can’t let go.

Top is the definition of an obsessed with aliens kid due to parental neglect. He is extremely self dependent. Arrogance that he can charm any person into dancing for him. But no one cares about who Top is and before Mew he kept the real Top who likes art hidden away. He can call Boeing or Boston to have relations with them because they don’t mean anything to Top so why would Mew care.

Sand’s conversation with Nick about talking to himself because he was lonely was very telling. I’m sure Sand did have people who considered Sand their friend but because of his emotional parentification he felt like no one could or should be there for Sand. He’s shocked when Nick wants to live with him because I bet he didn’t consider Nick someone who would help him out. He’s selfless to Ray because he is already expecting to be treated that way. Pushed aside not a priority and he feels like shit when he lets himself believe ray could challenge his place in life.

Ray 🥲 do I need to talk about him again. He has abandonment and depression issues from his mothers death that has lead to a mask. Shallow friendships. Shallow life. Ray is only a visitor. He can let go of Mew and Boston so easily because they didn’t really know ray anyway in his mind. Even Sand Ray held him so far away because he couldn’t believe sand wants to be patient loving to him. He’s afraid of the rejection the pain that can come with Sand being too close. But Sand keeps pushing his way in.

Boston someone who never received love before and thinks that is normal so he never gives it. Boston does feel love for his friends and Nick but showing it impossible. To protect himself he has meaningless flings never letting someone expect love from him. He keeps the reins of control because love scares him after his life of upheaval and neglect. He’s just a liability a temporary problem. He is going to leave soon. Internally Boston feels horribly alone because no one loves who he is because it’s so locked away there is no road of love in. But Nick sees it.

Nick doesn’t believe anyone could love him. Nick is extremely insecure about himself. He would rather people look at his outward appearance and ignore what he really is. The stalking is just a performance so Nick can be the one with all the knowledge in the relationship so Boston won’t see the horrible person Nick is. Nick can’t even let Sand really love him in a friendly way. He tricks himself into thinking it might be lust just because he has positive fuzzies for Sand. He can’t accept sand might just enjoy being about Nick for Nick.

Loneliness that binds them and keeps them separate. The great push and pull. Only. Friends. Lonely Friends.

[asifitsanotherbookblog]

Ya girls gone dark! 🖤

I am obsessed with Dark Romance at the minute.

Wether it’s a morally grey man, a mafia don.. or just a damn right crazy hot dude.. something about the possession these men hold to their girl 🥵 so good!

Learning I don’t have that many triggers.. or less than I expected 😅

In light of the craziness of people targeting taboo authors.. like why?! Yeah I won’t read a monster shifter because the semantics don’t tally in my head.. so I can’t read them but I seriously don’t get why people are going mad.. was it hurting you? Did you carry on reading? Buy the book and hate it? What’s made you think it’s okay to belittle authors.. did a character jump out of the book?? The answer is probably no. You carried on reading and accepted it wasn’t for you.

Did you know your negativity effects the lives of authors. They’re removing books from Amazon, and other streaming sets because of you targeting these authors. It’s not just taboo it happens constantly.

Books are like marmite/Vegemite you either love it or hate it and it’s not for you to shut down someone else’s passion.. I don’t want to be tied up and left in woods.. or do i 👀🤷🏼‍♀️😅 but you don’t see me going oh I hate this I’ll detail that persons life.

Your hiding behind a keyboard and a cause that means so little to you because your bored aren’t you? That’s all it is..

Anyway.. back to me finding a dark ass dude who is going to go wild before he falls for his girl!

Rant over, peace out bitches 🤪

Bye ✌🏼

[lady-corrine]

This is a rant abt the black and how people defend them so easily, you don’t have to read if you don’t want to,

Btw I’m teamless, I don’t support either side but I really don’t like how everyone depicts the blacks as the beacon of light (the heroes) especially in the Aemond situation

The fight between the kids was started by Daemon’s daughters and they all literally got Aemond to the floor and were ganging up on him until he picked up the rock (Which he wasn’t even gonna use because it was a scare tactic, he literally put it down until Jace pulled out the knife) and then when he starts to defend himself again luke takes his eye. I know people like to say “Well Aemond deserves it because he stole Vhagar” or “Well he shouldn’t have done it on the night of the funeral” but we are constantly told that dragons aren’t possessions and that the dragon has to bond and choose their rider, if vhagar hadn’t accepted Aemond then he’d be dead (Dragons aren’t family heirlooms passed down either) and while I do agree that it was wrong to bond with Vhagar at the night of Laena’s Funeral, I feel like people tend to block the fact that Rhaenyra sleeps with Daemon (He’s also to blame but I’m just pointing out a character flaw of Rhaenyra’s that people tend to ignore), Laena’s Widow, the exact same night also. Also Aegon, Jace and Luke bullied Aemond for not having a dragon so you can understand Aemond’s desperation because he was tired of being made fun of. Then in the next scene Rhaenyra sees that her brothers eye has been taken and still demands that he be tortured as to find out where he heard that her children were bastards, as if it wasn’t blatantly in your face that they are. Instead of Luke getting punishment (I’m not saying take his eye but this does also have something to do with a further point of mine, maybe taking his titles would have been better) the blacks get off Scott free even after starting this mess and taking a family members eye.

All that lead me onto my second point, Rhaenyra is spoiled. I know not many black fans like to see the truth but she is (I mean I saw that even her dragon is known as spoiled or smth). She’s constantly let off with a slap on the wrist because her father loves her so much he’s willing to look past everything she does, I think the perfect scene that shows this is when Viserys is telling her that Jahaerys would have disinherited her but he won’t because he holds too much love for her to do that. She acts as if she didn’t know what she did was wrong and blames everyone but herself for the outcome. Yet again when Aemond’s eye is taken by her son she gets away with it because Visery’s loves her a lot, his sons eye was just taken by her son and there’s no punishment for it 🤔. I do blame Visery’s for this because he raised her this way but it’s just a flaw of her character. She leaves Visery’s by himself for 6 years, even knowing he was ill and only came back to ask him to secure her son’s position. What kind of daughter abandons their dying father, who has shown nothing but love, and shows up only to ask him to secure her sons place even though he can hardly move and has been asked to rest? Selfish. She also expects everyone in the court to be on her side even though she’s hardly done a single thing to earn their respect. She won’t know what it’s like for Alicent who can’t refuse or go against the orders of the king like she can and just blames Alicent for being forced into a marriage.

I also feel l like if the blacks want to take a son for a son so seriously then they should have done the same for and eye for an eye.

Now don’t take this as me liking team green because I don’t, Rhaenyra would definitely be a better queen than Aegon, + I hate Aegon, I hate Otto and the others I just see a grey characters except for Helaena, she is an angel. The whole point of Hotd ,I feel, is that everyone does morally questionable things and should be seen as grey (except for the very few that are either just evil or good) and the whole reason I wrote this out is because I feel like everyone just makes the blacks the people that do no wrong, I’ve even seen people say that they’re excited for blood and cheese and excited to see this innocent child be killed and that it’s deserved when it really isn’t. If there was a punishment then Aemond wouldn’t have been so bitter.

[rainstormcolors]

For the meme:

YGO + 2, 12, 15

Tristan + 8, 9, 10

Hello! Thank you for the ask!

Yu-Gi-Oh!

2) …my three favorite characters and why I love them so much.

Seto Kaiba has been my favorite from the start. All the versions of him have their value and I enjoy them all, but my personal favorite version of the batch is the manga’s version of the character. The loneliness, his internal struggle that seems viscerally painful, the maladaptive behaviors and the search for understanding, and how it’s apparent he does want to connect with other people but he can’t understand this about himself or accept it. He’s so layered and yet the ambiguity is also relatable --- the way emotions cloud and blur, how we don’t have the words for things. And he’s fascinating and morally grey and allows an outlet for the heightened emotions we sometimes need to see, to connect with to understand this feeling is shared, even as he seems achingly alone, even as he achingly reaches out to others. The theme of grief is also very intense within this character while having a kind of subtly, the way these emotions fold into and hide in other emotions.

Mokuba Kaiba is next. Again I enjoy all the versions of this character but the manga’s version is my personal favorite. I feel he’s a very complex character in the manga’s canon with layers of emotion and a history which he carries and it’s only overshadowed due to him not being a duelist character. He’s so headstrong and loyal and he harbors anger, resentment, loneliness, love and devotion, and he’s incredibly proactive. Something that feels a little overlooked about him in canon is that Mokuba *also* explodes at Seto at Death-T, which is not to remotely excuse what happens later on at all, but rather it shows how the strain of everything had worn both of them down and left neither of them able to handle this.

Noa Kaiba is my third favorite character. A dark isolated attention-seeking and self-destructive doomed character who doesn’t really know what love is and is shocked to discover his capacity to love, that he can love and does love. There’s a certain desperation within Noa’s initial plan, abruptly kidnapping everyone with this hopeless idea that maybe he can just walk back into life as the Kaiba heir when that was never going to be possible, and really he just needed needed needed to interact with people from the outside even as all this hatred burned inside him.

12) …what attracted me into checking it out.

I’ve been a fan for a long time, since the show first aired Duelist Kingdom in the United States, although I can’t recall what exact episode I started with but I know it wasn’t the very start. I also read the manga as it was translated and published by VIZ.

15) …which character I would choose for the chopping block if I knew the writers wanted to kill someone.

If I’m entirely honest, even if there are issues in the writing, I kind of get the impression death was an important theme to Kazuki Takahashi, something he wanted to explore in some form, and he quite literally said this in an interview as well. Which is to say that despite the problems, I feel Yugi saying farewell to Atem as Atem left the world was something meaningful to KT in some form even if I feel I shouldn’t make guesses beyond that. I do think it’s very fair to dislike this ending or to discuss and point out the issues, but previous discussions could also be guilty of neglecting the personal angle this storybeat may have carried and how people do indeed have to say goodbye sometimes or watch someone they love die. Which is to say, I don’t want to change what may have been meaningful.

Tristan Taylor / Hiroto Honda

8) …a headcanon I have about this character.

I think he was kind of the family baby while his sister had “eldest daughter syndrome” in some form. I think he helped keep Jonouchi stable before the beginning of canon.

9) …which of their relationships I would have cultivated more if it were up to me (both romantic and platonic).

Honda’s kind of left in the background of the story but he’s also a constant presence through the story. He’s given personal relationships with Jonouchi and Otogi. I very much like the quiet loyalty he felt towards Mokuba. I wouldn’t mind more Honda and Mokuba content in that way, the way people can come to care about each other quietly. Also – Blankey! Imagine more Blankey scenes!

10) …if I liked them immediately or if took a while before I warmed up to their character. Alternatively, if I disliked them immediately or if they lost my trust as their story progressed.

I was neutral towards him for quite a while. I could appreciate him as a loyal friend but it wasn’t as if I personally gravitated towards trying to understand him particularly. I think fandom discussions have been very good for me engaging more with the text, the characters inside the text, what they mean, and how we relate to them, how other real people relate to them, and in turn I’ve been able to understand others as well.

Thank you again for the ask, and I wish you a nice day.

[aventvrina]

12, 13, and 14

canon questionnaire - @denominaticn - still accepting!

12. What would you say is the most unique trait about your character?

His resilient selfishness. It would be so easy to make him a simple sob story or have him just as a superficial morally grey character but the fact that he actually fights back and is unashamed about it is what makes me love him. Sure he is very self conscious to the point where his head is plagued with insecurities and second guesses but him pushing through and keeping the image even when everything falls is amazing. King shit. Never folds in game or life.

13. Are there any other characters from the franchise you’d like to play?

I think I've said it before but Serval! Though I'll be honest I feel that if i were to write her I would have already done it. She's been living in my head rent free since I installed the game and from time to time i do get the urge but ultimately I feel that she has been partially concluded (sadly because of her character quest though i really liked it!!). I guess it's just a matter of waiting out to see just how much more they can develop Belobog and actually involve her in it (I'd also love a band event we gotta see her perform and give her a new song my queen deserves it all). Other than her, I wouldn't mind writing Luka, he reminds me of an old OC i had so it'd be like coming home.

14. Are there some characters from the franchise you can’t stand?

 I don't think there's anyone in particular in HSR that I dislike, every character has something going on for them and even the NPC's are entertaining enough that I don't find them annoying.

[vacantgodling]

4 - Does your character care about their reputation and/or how others perceive them? 10 - If your character is an antagonist or something of the like, do they self-justify their actions? If so, how? 36 - What are the things that make your character enter a full rage/cold mode?

for anyone from btaf?

~@void-botanist

super annoyed that tumblr ate my first answer attempt but we move :/ thank you for asking! i’m gonna do the main 4 in my mind which are biscella, eduard, azelie, and sjaak.

4. Does your character care about their reputation and/or how others perceive them?

biscella: 4/10. because she’s romani and it’s the late 1700s-early 1800s she’s grown accustomed to people assuming the worst of her for just. existing. it doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt, she just has thick skin and is aware that she can’t control everyone.

eduard: 1/10 for humans, he only cares enough to get by in their society but not much beyond that. 8/10 for biscella specifically and that’s why he asks that his family not tell her that they’re vampires when he first brings her to the coven.

sjaak: 7/10 similar to biscella bc he’s biracial he’s used to gaining people’s ire. unlike biscella, he was cast into the world on his own at quite a young age and that definitely makes him more… sensitive to others perceptions of him. it’s something he struggles with a lot esp once he becomes a werewolf.

azelie: 0/10. she doesn’t care what other people think of her in the slightest.

10. If your character is an antagonist or something of the like, do they self-justify their actions? If so, how?

well, generally speaking sjaak, azelie, and eduard are Kind of antagonistic (it’s complicated) to the narrative so i’ll do this for these three.

eduard: like literally 10000% he self justifies his actions when he knows Damn Well what he’s doing makes not a lick of sense and it’s also anti ethical to what he’s saying. he says he loves and cares about biscella and marries her, but then gets her pregnant knowing Damn Well that all vampire spawn have a 100% mortality rate to their human host. he brings her home to his vampire ass family who only see her as a tool to further their goals (except azelie) and then Fakes His Own Fucking Death so that he doesn’t really have to face the music of biscella’s demise or having to tell her he’s a vampire. and then THE AUDACITY to haunt her ass literally. like my guy makes 0 sane decisions but continues to insist it’s love like nah there’s something wrong in ur head bro.

sjaak: the difference between him and eduard is he knows he’s wrong, he knows he’s being selfish and he doesn’t justify it. he knows he has no right but he does it anyway. it’s apart of him “accepting the beast” vibes tm.

azelie: it’s a bit complicated but despite being somewhat villain like when she needs to be she is the Most morally grey leaning into good territory of these three and when she does bad things she chalks it up as a means to an end. so not really self justifying.

36. What are things that make your character enter full rage/cold mode?

biscella: doesn��t really rage firstly, she’s more of a becomes cold character. usually when people insult her or those she cares about or as a defense mechanism to keep herself from internalizing anyone’s vitriol. but she tries to be compassionate most of the time.

eduard and azelie: hunger, really. when they need to feed or if someone’s threatening their life.

sjaak: becoming a werewolf is like a fast track to experiencing every emotion like 8x more intensely, however he only FULL ON rages when people attack humans or threaten biscella’s life.

[dollyyun]

HOUSE OF BALLOONS ✧ SERIES MASTERLIST

PAIRING ✧ hyung line + jungwon x fem!reader GENRE ✧ 18+(mdni), reverse harem, eventual poly, romance, adulthood, aged-up characters (enha members are older than reader), morally grey characters, office romance, forbidden romance element, mystery, dark themes, underground fighters!hyung line + jungwon GENERAL WARNING ✧ possessive male leads, obsessions, tensions, angsts, toxicity, explicit themes, profanities, corruption, coercion, perversion, alcohol consumption, violence, blood, graphic descriptions, traumas, tragedy, office/medical/underground fighting inaccuracies, smuts (warnings will be indicated on each part under cut), other k-idols appearances and made up ocs DISCLAIMER ✧ credits to nia (@intromortal) for indulging my enha!boxers agenda as well as for coming up with the idea! not to forget aj, who helped me with the tropes for each member with reader! TAGLIST ✧ open!comment💌below [ageless, blank, minor blogs will be denied]

✧ SUMMARY ✧

you never would have planned for your New Year's resolution to turn out entirely different than the initial one, because moving abroad and choosing to settle where you grew up had never been on your mind nor have you considered, but heartbreak does wonders to a person. In spite of your unannounced arrival that takes your uncle by surprise, he warmly welcomes you with open arms. He even offers to support you both financially and non-financially while you take your time to settle down and explore your options here, considering your decision to move abroad was done rather impulsively, but you refuse his generous offer. While you remain adamant in your hunt for a job that is relevant to your degree, your uncle makes another offer that you deem acceptable, and that is to work for him.

Though his company is relatively small, you find no issues in it as long as you manage to do something productive in the meantime, but the moment you step foot into the building, five highly attractive men pique your attention. They’re older than you and obviously more experienced working in the corporate industry, and that is probably why you're attracted to them, but you can’t deny that there is something dangerous about these men. Your suspicion for them grows when you begin to notice odd patterns in regards to their work shifts as well as the bruises they try to hide under their ironed suits.

Maybe you were right to be suspicious, because your taking of preventative measures resulted in an alarming discovery of the underground fighting club, which had been directly underneath the corporate building all this while. Somehow, you have a strong inkling that the illegal business that runs right under your uncle’s nose is meant to be a secret only they share, but little do you know that the owner is the same person you trust the most.

Now you are caught in a dilemma where the secret is stuck with you, and you have no idea how to confront your uncle about this. Eventually, the five men catch up to your discovery of their dual life and the underworld, and despite their differences, they don’t intend to let you escape the house of balloons, not when you are their most precious gem. You’re in their world now, and you belong to them.

➤ PROLOGUE

➤ PART ONE [ EARNED IT ]

SYNOPSIS ✧ Your second week on the job is already unpleasant, all thanks to Park fucking Jongseong. He irks you to no end, constantly getting on your nerves and never missing the opportunity to compete against you despite the fact that he’s the company’s auditor whereas you are the company’s secretary. Duty calls when you are required to work together with him, which means he’ll be glued to your side during office hours, no matter how much you hate it. Surprisingly, you begin to tolerate each other’s presences, where playful banter is often exchanged and the closeness feels rather intimate. His gaze turns into something sultry, as though inviting you to break the professional boundaries, and you do, multiple times, because Jay and his allure are simply impossible to resist. But your suspicion eventually begins on the same day Jay proves that he will always see you as his rival.

PAIRING ✧ jay park x fem!reader GENRE ✧ office rivals to lovers, underground fighter!jay, auditor!jay, company secretary!reader, eventual fluff, jay may be annoying and loves to get on reader's nerves WARNINGS ✧ angsts, toxicity, profanities, corruption, coercion, power imbalance, miscommunication, violence, blood, graphic descriptions, smut, dom!jay, sub!reader, unprotected sex(no!), pet names (baby, angel), light degradation, ice play, nipple play, breeding kink, multiple rounds & orgasms, overstimulation, vanilla sex mostly (jay is lowkey a loverboy),

➤ PART TWO [ THE HILLS ]

SYNOPSIS ✧ From the moment you first stepped foot into the office, you already knew that Sim Jaeyun would be trouble — the way his eyes constantly fix on you whenever you appear in his line of sight, gazing at you brazenly even after you catch his gorgeous brown eyes, and your presumption proves correct when he finally makes his move on you. Compared to Jay, Jake is more tolerable to be with in spite of his relentless yet harmless flirtatious attempts that you often brush off, but that doesn't mean you are immune to his charms. You know that he is playing around with you, and based on your experience, guys like him are no good news, but you can’t help with your attraction that is growing dangerously towards him, making yourself a fallen victim to his dark, irresistible allure. Little do you know that your intimate involvement with Jake infuriates Jay, which eventually leads to a brutal face-off without your knowledge, or so they thought.

PAIRING ✧ jake sim x fem!reader GENRE ✧ friends to lovers, friends with benefits kinda, underground fighter!jake, business analyst!jake, company secretary!reader, fluffs, golden retriever!jake who is also a major flirt WARNINGS ✧ light angst, eventual toxicity, profanities, corruption, coercion, violence, blood, graphic descriptions, smut, softdom!jake, sub!reader, unprotected sex(no!), dry humping, rough and messy sex, oral (f & m.receiving), pet names (sweetheart, gorgeous), slight degradation, biting, creampies, cum eating, multiple rounds & orgasms, overstimulation, pussy munch jake, he's a huge simp for reader

➤ PART THREE [ HEARTLESS ]

SYNOPSIS ✧ If you thought Jay was unbearable, then you clearly haven’t met Park Sunghoon, except that you did meet him on the first week of your job, but he hadn’t been making himself prominent within your radar as you notice that he often steers clear of you whenever you are in any part of the building, as if you are the plague. That goes on until Sunghoon begins to make an unfavourable approach towards you — constantly criticising and nitpicking everything you do, his cold eyes glaring at you, showcasing his superiority over you, and just doing everything in his power to remind you that you are undeserving of your position and diminishing your worth in the workplace. There is no doubt that he hates you just as you hate him, and yet you want to understand what qualities you have that incite his hatred towards you in the way he treats you. As the tension intensifies quickly, it's inevitable that both of you will succumb to the temptation, particularly when Sunghoon's desire for you matches his loathing for you. Time will prove to you again that heartless is the perfect word to describe a callous man like Sunghoon.

PAIRING ✧ park sunghoon x fem!reader GENRE ✧ enemies to lovers, slowburn-ish, underground fighter!sunghoon, manager!sunghoon, company secretary!reader, eventual fluff, morally grey!sunghoon (he's mean af) WARNINGS ✧ tensions, heavy angst, toxicity, profanities, corruption, power imbalance, coercion, violence, blood, graphic descriptions, smut, harddom!sunghoon, sub!reader, unprotected sex(no!), rough sex, oral (f & m.receiving), fingering, choking, biting, hair pulling, brat tamer, pet names (princess, red), manhandling, spitting, size kink, degradation, creampies, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, crying

➤ PART FOUR [ AFTER HOURS ]

SYNOPSIS ✧ Throughout the weeks of complication surrounding the three men, you are more than thankful to have someone who you can depend on for moral support. Yang Jungwon has been by your side since day one, and unlike some other people, he has no malicious intent nor is he intolerable. His amicable approach, as well as his overall amiability, makes the workplace a little less dull. He often offers you guidance and helps you in any way he can, even if you are having a hard time with the office printer. You feel an instinctual safety whenever you are with him, and you trust him the most, but there is a slight problem. You often notice how Jungwon completely detaches himself from you after office hours, and it hurts your feelings as you acknowledge that he will always remain as your work friend. Nothing more, nothing less. You should be grateful that nothing changes in your dynamic with him in the workplace, but you want him to notice you not only as his work friend but maybe something more. So when you finally gain the courage to confront him, it also leads to your eventual discovery of the underworld, where violence persists and normalises, causing a drastic change in your view towards the man who you thought was harmless.

PAIRING ✧ yang jungwon x fem!reader GENRE ✧ friends to lovers, work besties, underground fighter!jungwon, marketing coordinator!jungwon, company secretary!reader, fluffs WARNINGS ✧ tension, light angst, toxicity, profanities, corruption, coercion, violence, blood, graphic descriptions, smut, meandom!jungwon, sub!reader, unprotected sex(no!), rough and messy sex (some vanillas), pure filth, oral (f.receiving), fingering, edging, choking, pet names (doll, bunny), degradation, pwp, manhandling, dirty talks, bondage, squirting, multiple rounds & orgasms, overstimulation, crying

➤ PART FIVE [ DIE FOR YOU ]

SYNOPSIS ✧ After keeping your promise to retain your discovery of their dual life as a secret to Jungwon, there is an unsettling feeling of both fear and wariness upon having the knowledge that these men are more than capable of killing with their bare hands, and yet there is a sinister part of you that finds them hotter than they already were. Most especially, it is harder to ignore your direct superior, who you will remain working for until your uncle returns from his prolonged overseas business trip, otherwise known as Lee Heeseung. He is by far the most reserved and mysterious man you ever met, and while he is not a man of many words, his dark eyes hold masses of dominance. Though he isn’t exactly as callous as Sunghoon, there is something about him that makes you meekly submissive, unable to refuse his order in any way. Just as you decide to assume the worst of him hating you, he proves your presumption wrong when he breaks the forbidden boundaries, no longer holding himself back and allowing his burning desire for you to consume him. You are prudent to the fact that this man is dangerous and is capable of causing damage, be it in the office or outside, especially after witnessing his fighting element, but you have never felt safer than you are in his arms.

PAIRING ✧ lee heeseung x fem!reader GENRE ✧ slowburn-ish, underground fighter!heeseung, cheif operation officer!heeseung, company secretary!reader, eventual fluffs, morally grey!heeseung (he appears coldly mysterious and reserved in reader's pov) WARNINGS ✧ tension, angst, toxicity, profanities, corruption, coercion, violence, blood, graphic descriptions, smut, mean & harddom!heeseung (he's unpredictable), sub!reader, unprotected sex(no!), rough sex (some vanillas here and there when reader least expects it), filth, oral (f.receiving), fingering, choking, pet names (love, darling), degradation, dirty talks, praise kink, light bondage, blindfold, spanking, orgasm control, squirting, multiple rounds & orgasms, overstimulation, crying, heeseung is obsessed over reader

➤ PART SIX [ PARTY MONSTER ]

SUMMARY ✧ Words begin to circulate around the corporate building of your secret affair with Heeseung, resulting in you receiving unwanted attention and scornful stares from your fellow employees, but above all, this incites bitterness from four specific individuals, albeit you have no strings attached to Heeseung that pertain to romance, as he has made it clear to you that you are nothing more than his secretary. In the midst of your predicament, you remain headstrong, refusing to allow anyone to see a glimpse of the brokenness in you, but your wilfulness leads to an adventure that is both thrilling and risky as you venture into the underworld, and choices do have consequences. Yours happen to be the very men who you have been avoiding for days. Little do you know that you are in for a wild ride of the night, or maybe for a few nights.

PAIRING ✧ hyung line + jungwon x fem!reader GENRE ✧ 18+(mdni), reverse harem, eventual poly, romance, adulthood, aged-up characters, morally grey characters, office romance, mystery, some dark themes, underground fighters!hyung line + jungwon WARNINGS ✧ tension, angsts, toxicity, profanities, jealousy, denial, miscommunication, misunderstanding, corruption, coercion, alcohol consumption, partying, violence, blood, graphic descriptions, smuts, dom!hyung line + jungwon, sub!reader, unprotected sex(no!), dry humping, oral (f & m.receiving), fingering, choking, degradation, dirty talks, brat tamers, praise kink, teasing, squirting, multiple rounds & orgasms, overstimulation, threesome, foursome

➤ PART SEVEN [ LOST IN THE FIRE ]

SYNOPSIS ✧ It turns out that there are still shards of rationality left in you, and it brings a bitter taste to your tongue as you agonisingly acknowledge how scandalous your trysts with these five men have been, betraying the trust your beloved uncle placed in you. Despite their collective assertion and the reassurance, you know that it is for the best to walk away from whatever strings they have with you, even if the weight of devastation weighs heavy in your heart. But you have underestimated their persistence in having you permanently in their lives, even if it means they would have to share you. Unbeknownst to them, problems emerge that involve your safety. Will they be able to get back their beloved gem unscathed?

PAIRING ✧ hyung line + jungwon x fem!reader, GENRE ✧ 18+(mdni), reverse harem, eventual poly, romance, adulthood, aged-up characters, morally grey characters, office romance, mystery, underground fighters!hyung line + jungwon WARNINGS ✧ tension, angsts, toxicity, intoxication, profanities, possessive, corruption, coercion, violence, blood, graphic descriptions, smuts, dom!hyung line + jungwon, sub!reader, unprotected sex(no!), dry humping, oral (f & m.receiving), fingering, choking, teasing, degradation, dirty talks, biting, spitting, praise kink, breeding kink, cum eating, squirting, anal, double penetrations, multiple rounds & orgasms, overstimulation, crying, threesomes, sixsome (if that's even a word)

➤ PART EIGHT [ SÂO PAULO ]

SYNOPSIS ✧ Things finally work out pretty well between you and these men. After the incident, they have become fiercely protective and possessive over you, fearing that they might lose you again. Despite the violence and unrefined qualities in their nightly job as underground fighters, you are supportive of them, especially knowing that they are the elite underground fighters in all of SoKor, which is why they have been personally invited to the eminent underground fighting club in São Paulo, Brazil. Of course, you will join them in their adventure, not that you are given any choice, but nevertheless you feel excited to venture into this new aspect of your life with the ones whom you can now call home.

PAIRING ✧ hyung line + jungwon x fem!reader GENRE ✧ 18+(mdni), reverse harem, poly, romance, adulthood, aged-up characters, morally grey characters, office romance, mystery, underground fighters!hyung line + jungwon WARNINGS ✧ tension, toxicity, intoxication, profanities, possessive, alcohol consumption, partying, violence, blood, graphic descriptions, smuts, dom!hyung line + jungwon, sub!reader, unprotected sex(no!), dry humping, oral (f & m.receiving), fingering, choking, teasing, exhibitionism, degradation, dirty talks, biting, spitting, praise kink, breeding kink, cum eating, squirting, anal, double penetrations, multiple rounds & orgasms, overstimulation, love-making, eventual sixsome

PERM TAGLIST:

@ja3yun @yzzyhee @sunpov @vveebee @jiryunn

@nshmrarki @roslayy @machambrx @wonnienyang @punchbug9-blog

@hollyoongs @chicxxy @tunafishyfishylike @norucking @riribelle

@lol6sposts @skzenhalove @reading-wh0re @tinie03 @cyjhhyj

@jungwonsstrawberriesnchocolate @mitmit01 @strxwbloody @woorcve @1309zip

@fancypeacepersona @tsukiflwr @karinaever @wolfhardbby @moonpri

@lucid-sombra @kittylicious-purr @addictedtohobi @lillotus17 @minahaeyo

@in-somnias-world @jezzzzzzmin @deobitifull @doublebunv @mamuljji

@adroitlane @wilonevys @florestalio @senazzzz @firstclassjaylee

@hellokittygurl9999 @woorcve @1309zip @vwricky

TAGLIST:

@aanniikkaa @aisuruyo @nyxtwixx @andbadtz @jakeswifez

@sleepyhoon @heebear @chaoticlawfulsstuff @jakehandholder @ribbioniki

@darlingjungwon @luvyouloser @antoinettenotfound @d-dilemma @stercul1a

@kflwrs @immelissaaa @asscoups17 @gvnwks @capri-cuntz

@vegahrid

[thewhumpcaretaker]

Hi, I hugely admire your writing and blogging! I’ve been thinking all day about the issue raised of some assault/abuse survivors feeling dirty or erased due to increasing restrictions on sexual content, or even being attacked for writing content that may help them, but harm others.

IMO what is needed is greater acceptance that both safe spaces where certain content restrictions apply and uncensored/DLDR/“anything goes” spaces can exist, and a clearer separation/designation between the two. Because we do need both! Trying to make every space one way or the other is impossible, and inevitably hurts someone.

I think we also need a norm that if something is posted in a designated uncensored space, it should not be linked to or discussed, even for purposes of hating it, in spaces with content restrictions that it violates. Granted, this would take some fun away from those who are motivated more by feeling morally superior and harassing others than actually protecting anyone, but would help those who sincerely want to avoid that content. Because even just hearing about how awful this thing is and how evil this person is for writing it is still hearing about it, you know?

Thank you so much for being willing to have this conversation.

TW: discussion of SA and ethicality below

First I want to get really clear about what we’re talking about. We’re talking specifically about fictional, graphic scenes of SA in which there’s no prior consent and in which this would be traumatizing for the character either in the moment or long term, and yet it’s treated as erotica for the audience. We’re also talking about any fictional CSA shown on the page.

We’re not talking about personal accounts of real assault stories. We’re not talking about character backstories. We’re not talking about tactfully handled scenes that are meant to show the horror of rape and focus solely on its impact for the survivor. We’re not even talking about dark romance/yandare/dubious consent stuff where both characters are into it and it’s far removed from what actual assault looks like, because that’s basically just a BDSM scene idea with the BDSM framing removed for better immersion (this is a grey area for me, it depends how it’s handled, anyway I’m getting off topic).

Okay, so these are my thoughts:

Those divided spaces exist. They exist all over the place, including plenty of communities within tumblr. Heck, all of tumblr that is correctly tagged, because you can filter out words like SA.

This works great for things that are “icks” for many people, content like scat or bloodplay or even SA within character backstories. Some people don’t want to see that and others do and that’s fine. It does not work for content that is bad to create. I personally do think that some content is bad to create. I know some people don’t, but that’s my opinion. I think, even in the privacy of your own home, there’s something not cool about wanting to make and view scenes of CSA. Obviously I can’t stop you. Obviously you don’t have to care what I think. I was asked my opinion like a week ago about whether someone should create that kind of content and I said no. I wouldn’t have even given my opinion on that otherwise, just out of the blue. It’s not something that I want to talk about. I acknowledge that I may be biased, I’m not some moral arbiter, I don’t know what’s right any better than the next person. But to me personally, that does not sound right, and if someone asks me if they should write/draw that, I’ll say no. The space where they’re doing it doesn’t make it okay - to me, one random person on the internet.

I also want to make a huge distinction between saying that I think it’s a bad thing to do to create a certain kind of content, and saying that the person who is creating it is bad. I don’t believe in shaming. I don’t believe certain people are bad. I don’t believe in throwing away the whole person. It’s not helpful. Please don’t harass anyone over this. But if someone wants to have a conversation about whether they should make this content: again, my answer will be no.

Finally, I just want to say, please stop. It’s a request, you don’t have to. But I don’t want to talk about this and I’m not doing okay. I will continue talking about it if given thoughtful asks like this one, because I care about the people on this blog and want them to feel heard. I don’t feel I have a right to turn you away. But I am very distressed. You can talk about this on your own blog if it’s important to you.