#there's a slot for it i've just never bit the bullet

[queen-scribbles]

I really wish when SWtOR updates were coming, they would give estimate download size along with the patch notes. My laptop is always running on a hairsbreadth of free space (10 gb or less unless I delete crap) and it would be nice to know a) howw much clean up I need to do and b) if it's worth trying or just gonna be Too Big

[luffington]

meanie ♡

➤ summary: Zoro tests out a remote-controlled vibrator on you in the middle of town. (18+)

➤ pairing: roronoa zoro x afab!reader

➤ word count: 2.6k

➤ warnings: voyeurism, semi-public sex, established relationship, degradation, humiliation, fluff at the end, franky being franky, fem terms for reader

➤ notes: i've been thinking about this concept for MONTHS and i finally got around to writing it! might make a sequel featuring sanji.. who knows :3

NSFW under the break! minors dni thank uuu

“What is it?” You asked after several moments of silence, studying the foreign object your boyfriend had placed in the palm of your hand. Bright blue, shaped like an oversized bullet with a slightly tapered tip, coated with soft silicone. It definitely wasn’t a weapon or a tool. Zoro’s matching remote didn’t provide any clues. 

“Something I asked Franky to make.” Zoro answered smugly but internally cringed at the memory. A few days ago, he had approached the cyborg with bright red cheeks and mumbled his request without making eye contact. Franky simply responded ‘suuuperrr!’, and Zoro was still trying to forget the fact that he already knew how to build it. “Wanna see how it works?”

The remote only had three dark blue buttons: up, down, and power. He pressed the latter and you flinched as the object suddenly sprung to life in your hand, vibrating softly but consistently. “It… vibrates? Okay, but what is it used fo–” It finally clicked in your brain. “Ohhh. Oh, Zoro.” 

He mirrored your knowing smirk with his own. “C’mon, let’s test it out.”

You could barely stand the next morning, wobbling along the deck even though the sea was calm. Nami gave you a suspicious look before announcing that the ship was about to stop at a nearby island for a supply refill. 

Zoro approached you from behind, his muscular body pressed against your back. Breath tickling your ear as he whispered, “Perfect chance to use it again.”

Your eyes widened. “You mean… on the island? In public?”

“What do you think the remote is for?” He frowned. “We talked about this, I thought you were into it. But if you don’t want to…” 

You shook your head — you definitely wanted to. This was a persisting fantasy of yours, something you’d never admitted to your past partners out of embarrassment. But you trusted Zoro more than anyone. However, touching yourself while imagining the thrill of being caught was very different from the impending reality which made your stomach flutter with anxiety. 

“It’s either in town or on the Sunny. Would you rather maybe get caught by strangers or definitely get caught by our friends?” Zoro added with an annoyed expression, “Knowing my luck, that shitty cook would be the first to notice.”

Okay, he had a point. Not just Sanji – getting caught by any of your crewmates would be incredibly awkward. At least you would never see anyone in town again.

So you let Zoro lead you to the men’s quarters, climbing onto his bed as he grabbed the vibrator from his locker. Laughing as he playfully pushed you flat on your back, slotting himself between your legs and easily pulling down your skirt and undies. He ran two fingers up and down your slit before rubbing your clit in small circles. You bit back a moan – this was gonna be a long day. When you were wet enough, Zoro pushed the vibe snugly inside your pussy.

You expected him to keep going and turn it on, maybe let you cum if he was in an especially good mood. But he hopped off the bed, adjusting his rumpled shirt and leaving you to fix your own clothes. “Let’s get going. I need a fucking drink.”

The two of you had been walking around town for nearly a half hour and Zoro hadn’t touched the remote. You passed a bar fifteen minutes ago and he kept walking – he was stalling. Parading you in front of dozens of new faces and leaving you constantly anticipating the vibrations to start. It didn’t help that he kept his hand and the remote in the same pocket of his pants.

A flashy weapons shop caught his eye. He claimed he needed new materials for taking care of his swords, but you didn’t think there was anything wrong with what he had on the ship. You practically clung to him nervously as he wandered around the shop. He occasionally stopped to study items, seeming a little too interested in a sword that was comically worse than his current ones. 

As he picked it up for a closer look, the toy sprung to life inside of your pussy, causing you to squeal in shock. Vibrations sent shivers up your spine, and you felt a fire ignite in your core just as embarrassment burned in your mind. Zoro turned the power up two levels and snickered when you grabbed onto his shirt sleeve to steady yourself. “Careful, babe, there’s a lot of sharp edges around.”

“I know that.” You pressed your forehead against his shoulder and shut your eyes tightly. Unable to do anything besides rub your thighs together. The vibrations weren’t nearly strong enough to make you cum, but they were impossible to ignore. 

“The shopkeeper’s looking at you.” Your boyfriend whispered in a sultry tone. “Bet he wishes you were clinging to him instead. He definitely knows how easy you are. How easy it is to get your slutty cunt soaking wet. You just need a pair of eyes on you, huh?”

“You’re so mean,” you pouted, clenching onto his arm even tighter. Zoro turned up the toy another level and you bit back a moan. You hesitantly turned to look at the shopkeeper, a balding man with beady eyes. He seemed skeptical, not entirely sure what was going on, but his lecherous gaze still moved up and down your body as if he were appraising you. 

“Stop staring at my girlfriend, you goddamn creep.” Zoro suddenly growled and grabbed your hand, quickly moving to the exit as you stumbled behind him. The shopkeeper flushed red and opened his mouth to respond, but Zoro cut him off. “All of your swords are fucking awful.” 

You giggled as the door slammed behind you. “Zoro, if you’re gonna get jealous, why are we doing this?”

“I’m not jealous. I’m showing off what’s mine.” He was right – ‘jealous’ wasn’t the best word to describe him, since you made it clear that he had no competition. ‘Possessive’ was more accurate. He’d been like that since the start of your relationship. Always asking who your pussy belonged to, marking you with bruises and hickies, making you scream his name over and over as he pounded his cock into you. 

Thankfully, you had grown used to the light vibrations after a few minutes – Zoro was kind enough to turn the power level down, but didn’t shut it off. The two of you entered the bar you’d passed earlier, a dark and dingy place with about a dozen people inside.

“Hey!” Luffy’s obscenely loud voice rang throughout the building. He waved you over to where he was sitting, the large table already covered in empty dishes. Your eyes widened and you subtly shook your head at Zoro. The swordsman ignored you and strolled over to the bar counter to order two glasses of sake, leaving you no choice but to sit across from your captain. 

Your boyfriend placed a glass in front of you and moved his chair incredibly close to yours, resting his hand on your bare upper thigh. You shifted in your seat — big mistake. The toy was now pressed against the most sensitive spot inside you. 

“What’ve you guys been doing? Zoro, I thought you’d come straight here,” Luffy asked around a mouthful of food.

Zoro mentioned the shops you stopped by, casually turning the vibrator much higher mid-sentence. You clamped a hand over your mouth just in time to muffle your lewd moan, bending over in surprise as the toy insistently massaged your walls. It simultaneously felt heavenly and sadistic – the unrelenting pressure on your g-spot and Zoro’s big hand tightening on your thigh, clearly satisfied by your response. 

Luffy seemed confused, but Zoro told him that sake doesn’t always sit right with your stomach. Yeah, sure, your glazed over eyes and squirming legs could definitely pass as a stomach ache. Maybe to your oblivious captain, but certainly not to the people around you.

Your boyfriend’s hand moved farther up your leg, sneaking under your skirt to thumb at the waistband of your panties and rub the sensitive skin underneath. The toy got even stronger, probably on its highest setting at this point. Zoro continued his conversation with Luffy without stumbling once, barely glancing at you when you spilled your second round of sake all over your white shirt. 

“What’s wrong with you?” Luffy frowned, leaning across the table to study you closely. You prayed he wouldn’t look down and notice Zoro’s half-hidden hand. “Maybe you should talk to Chopper.”

“No! No Chopper!” You immediately exclaimed, making Zoro chuckle quietly. “I… I mean I’m fine, I’m not sick.”

Your captain hummed in thought, but in typical Luffy fashion, shrugged and said, “Well, whatever.”

Zoro finally turned to look at you with a sly grin. “Why don’t we go to the bathroom to wash off that stain?” You instantly nodded in agreement.

The swordsman shoved you against the wall of a men’s bathroom stall and crashed his lips against yours, devouring your mouth like an animal. One hand held your wrists together above your head and kept you in place as the other trailed across your chest, stopping to squeeze your tits. He delighted in your barely restrained moans and breathy whimpers of his name.

“You have no idea how fucking sexy that was,” he panted against your lips. “You’re so bad at hiding how much of a dirty whore you are for attention. All you need is your cute cunt touched and you’re gone. You probably have no idea where we are right now. The only thing your slutty brain can think about is my cock, right?”

“Yes, fuck, Zoro, I need you so badly.” With a satisfied smirk, he hiked up your skirt and pulled your panties down to your mid-thighs. Unceremoniously pushing two fingers inside your hole to retrieve the vibrator. You were so lucky that the bathroom was empty – the noise you made was unholy. 

“Your panties are fucking soaked,” he snickered, admiring the obvious wet spot on the fabric. But Zoro didn’t turn the toy off, simply turned down the vibrations then reached under your shirt and pressed it against your nipple. You cried out again as he adjusted its position so your bra would keep it firmly in place.

Zoro flipped you around so you were facing the wall. He was right – you were much too cockdrunk (and slightly tipsy on real alcohol) to care about how unhygienic a bar bathroom was. You unconsciously wiggled your hips when you heard the sound of his zipper and felt his hard cock rest on top of your ass. He grabbed your wrists again to keep them firmly pinned behind your back. 

“Don’t even need to prep you, I can just slide right in,” the swordsman chuckled. He rubbed the tip of his cock against your clit teasingly, then shoved his entire length inside you in one rough thrust. You let out a pleased moan, glad that you were finally getting the orgasm you’d been anticipating for at least an hour. Zoro rested his head in the crook of your neck. “You’re so damn loud. We’re still in public, y’know.”

“So shut me up.” You pressed your lips against his again, tongues swirling around each other in a messy dance as he continued to fuck you hard. His cock hit all the right places inside you, the ridges and veins and warmth giving you a more human sense of satisfaction than the electronic toy ever could. It still buzzed away against your nipple, which was almost painfully stiff at that point. Zoro panted heavily against your mouth – riling you up inevitably got him riled up, and he was just as close to hitting his peak as you were.

The bathroom door opened.

Both of you froze. Your entire body went as stiff as a mannequin, too afraid to even breathe. Zoro narrowed his good eye and listened closely to every single footstep, door creak and ruffle of clothes. There were three bathroom stalls, and the stranger was courteous enough to use the one farthest from you, leaving an empty one in between. Once he was sure that the person wasn’t a Straw Hat, Zoro’s hand moved from gripping your ass to cupping your face, silently pushing two fingers between your lips. You gagged around them anxiously.

“Now we really gotta be quiet,” the swordsman whispered directly in your ear. You didn’t have time to question what he meant before he slowly moved his hips back, his dick pulling out of you inch by inch until only the tip was inside of you. He pushed back in just as carefully, the quietest smack of skin as his hips met your ass echoing in your racing mind. The stranger heard it, you knew he heard it. Zoro shifted again and you shook your head in protest, but he just pushed his fingers farther down your throat and continued to fuck you. 

The sound of a toilet flushing made you jump. Zoro’s hips moved in slow circles and grinded his cock against your walls, deep and deliberate. You heard the stranger unlock his stall and turn on the sink outside. If he glanced in the mirror, he would definitely see two pairs of feet pressed together underneath your stall. Your pussy clenched at the thought, causing Zoro to grunt quietly.

As soon as the bathroom door swung closed, Zoro pulled his spit-soaked fingers from your mouth and you gasped for air. “Good little slut listened to me for once,” he chuckled and resumed his previous brutal pace, thick cock filling your cunt so perfectly and prodding at your cervix. 

“Fuck, I’m so close…” You whined, feeling drool drip down your chin.

Zoro promptly reached underneath you to massage your clit. “I’m right there, too, baby. Cum for me.” His words – his permission – brought you over the edge. You saw stars and really tried your best to not let the entire bar hear you. Moments later, thick spurts of cum coated your insides, Zoro biting down on your shoulder to muffle his own satisfied groan. 

You stayed pressed together as you both caught your breath, his cock still snugly inside you. “Zoro, the vibrator–” He had clearly forgotten about it, but there was no way you could ignore the incessant buzzing against your practically numb nipple. He instantly fumbled to grab the remote from his pocket, finally shutting the toy off.

“My fault,” he mumbled apologetically. Letting out a content sigh and wrapping his arms around your waist. “I know I’m an asshole, but, uh, thank you. For being so good to me.”

“You’re not an asshole,” you frowned, gently rubbing the top of his head. “I’m the one who asked for this. I like it when you’re a meanie, and I like that you like it, too.”

He grinned and nuzzled into your touch, prompting you to pull him even closer. “Is there a difference between an asshole and a meanie?”

“Of course. I would never date an asshole. Just a guy who fucks me exactly how I want it.” You giggled to yourself. “We’re going to a clothing store before we leave, by the way. You owe me a new shirt.”

When you exited the bathroom, cheeks still slightly flushed and dry sweat on your temple, Franky had stolen your chair at the table, sitting across from Luffy and chugging a bottle of cola. He spotted you two and immediately gave you a big thumbs up, shouting “Yow!”. Both of you blushed furiously — so much for avoiding getting caught by your crew. Perverts recognized perverts, you supposed. 

[eddieisashifter]

𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓'𝐒 𝐈𝐍 𝐌𝐘 𝐁𝐀𝐆? — MY SIX OF CROWS REALITY

after making one of these for my marauders reality (see here!) I've been inspired to make another! this one is a bit different though, because it's more of a utility belt than a bag. but, hey, it's got bags on it so that counts, right? as before, inspired by this post by @chaaistained and this one by @hrrtshape and, most recently, this one by @macknshift!! (y'all's stuff is always beautiful by the way mwah mwah)

this belt bag is a frankenstein creation of a couple things. It originally started as just the big pouch, but then I realized I needed more storage and added a second pouch. then I kept accidently breaking the glass vials I was having wylan make for me and it got everything soaked in poison, which isn't ideal. so I made the little holster for them!

first pocket—left side is the outer pocket and right is the main pocket

OUTER POCKET

𓅂 various makeup products stolen from various sources. two lip balms one from kerch and the other from shu han. both expensive. mascara I stole from poppy that I use occasionally, also doubles as eyeliner. also nina's lipstick that I hold onto for her because she asked me to.

𓅂 a flip out mirror that once was my mothers. one of the few trinkets I have left from my time in ravka

𓅂 a cigarette case that was once kaz's. he said he didn't want it anymore, I think he just wanted me to have something of his to hold onto.

𓅂 gears from wylan's workshop that I kept "accidently" pocketing. they were shiny.

MAIN POCKET

𓅂 my sketchbook. my pride and joy. my precious. it has a place for not only paper, but also slots for all my main pens and pencils all in one place.

𓅂 my other pride and joy. I love this things to death. I first took them to try and I have never regreted it. makes the most beautiful landscape paintings of the view of ketterdam outside kaz's office's window

𓅂 various notes and cards including—a card from a winning hand against jesper, a piece of poetry torn from my sketchbook and slightly crumpled (far too sappy to be consumed without cringing), a postcard from ravka. it might be from my family, I didn't care to check, but didn't have the heart to throw it away. a strength tarot card from nina's deck that she gave me after a reading and a death card from mine that I took out—I'm done with change in my future.

second pocket & weapons

SECOND POCKET

𓅂 a pouch full of kruge coin. there's probably also some bills shoved in there, but the coin just makes a lovely sound.

𓅂 a flask full of the whiskey from kaz's office. no other tastes the same as his.

𓅂 various stolen keys. not sure where they all unlock, but they are very pretty. once again, they were shiny, leave me alone.

𓅂 an ace lighter that someone left at the crow club. too bad, so sad, it's mine now.

𓅂 old dice that are so worn down that you can't make out the numbers very well. I keep them around for the noises.(this is a pattern of mine)

𓅂 my lucky deck of cards, blessed by kaz's sneaky ass magician hands by making my ace of spades disappear. I still havent gotten it back. the deck's still pretty lucky though.

𓅂 a pocketwatch that also used to belong to kaz. he has like three, I doubt he'd miss this one.

𓅂 a few bullets from jesper's gun, also good luck charms, blessed by jesper's unnaturally straight aim (aka fabrikated)

𓅂 a couple lockpicking tools because you never know when you might need them

WEAPONS—some are stored in my belt, others on my person, every single one felt important to include

𓅂 my beloved garrote wire. inej has her saint knives, jesper has his guns, and I have this. I love this one, though it isn't always practical to use, that's where the others come in. however, if I have a choice, this is what I'm reaching for. stored around the edge of my belt, the ends coming together to make a buckle.

𓅂 the only not-weapon here: a lucky dice keychain that jesper gave me. a little ironic, considering his own bad luck at the tables, however they haven't seemed to give me any bad energy yet. clipped onto the loop on my belt.

𓅂 three feather knives that are my treasures. my garrote is always my first choice, however these babies are just as reliable. my first knives when I came to ketterdam, they've never one done me wrong. usually stashed in my boots.

𓅂 a flip out knife that I brought over from ravka with me. I don't remember where it came from, but something tells me it was once important to someone. and now, it's important to me. usually in my inner pocket.

𓅂 my last feather knife that inej gave me from her collection. she said it was her way of protecting me, by giving me one of her saints. sankta margaretha, I think she said was this knife's name. patron saint of thieves and lost children, I believe. fitting. however, I'm not exactly one to believe in the power of the saints. the gesture means more to me though than the name.

[authorjoeypaul]

HOW I PLAN MY WRITING TIME

I've been someone who's good at being organised my whole life. While there have been times when I've been more scattered than usual, I almost always come back to my planning and organising ways. This is especially true when it comes to planning my time, working or otherwise. I thought that today I would give you a glimpse into how I make it work for me, and maybe along the way give you some tips that might help you do the same, should it work for you.

Planning has always been something that comes naturally to me, except when it comes to actually drafting, and then I'm just organised chaos because I lean more to pantsing than I do to planning. But that's not the point. The point is that it's something I've always found particularly easy, having gone from my school days and colour coded studying timetables and onto uni where I did the same, and then into writing where it took me a while to find a way to effectively plan my writing time.

I've been writing for over twenty years now. I've been published for twenty years in August and yet when it comes to having solid plans for that writing time, especially given how easily organisation comes to me, it took me a really really, really long time to find a way of planning my time that worked for me. I think some of it has to do with being chronically ill. I struggled to find a way that worked for me within the limitations of my conditions. For a long time while doing uni, and even before and after that, I would have to plan tentatively, because there was a very big chance that I'd end up in hospital for an amount of time.

While now my health has calmed somewhat, or at least I'm more able to manage at home, I have a better idea on how to make the limited time I do have work. Saying that, it still took me years to bring it to a point where I was very happy with it. I know a lot of writers who swear by bullet journals, or planners, and for a long long time, I couldn't get into it. My start in planing my time was the sticky notes app on my computer, and then I started very very small, and made sure to leave a lot of catch up days.

Those who've been on my blog before, or even on my Authortube channel, know that I will talk a lot about having adequate time to both rest, and leaving room for things going wrong. Because when you're chronically ill and disabled, things will always go wrong at some point. It even happens to the healthy people too. I didn't want to set myself up to fail. I didn't want to put too much pressure on myself, and I didn't want to be in a position where I wanted or needed to get something done in a certain time period, and just could not manage it. It was all about finding that balance between work, down time (which I'll talk about in a couple of weeks), and meeting any deadlines that I had to get things down by.

It was not easy, but then again doing things like this never are. It's rare that you land on something that works the first time you try. I did sticky notes, setting myself just one thing to do a day, with those catch up and such days included. From there I gravitated when I found a planner that worked for me, and kept with the one thing a day, but once I saw the success I was having, because in the start it wasn't only about the plan, but having the energy and time to get it done in that space. But once I hit a point where I could manage to do the things, I started to branch out, put a bit more on my plate, and make it so that some days, I had a couple of things to do a day. I didn't go for every day because even now, even after all this time, I still need to keep that precarious balance just right or I crash and fall.

So while my way works, while my planner is the right one for me, I know that my way is not the only way, and it can simply be a case of finding the right way of doing things, and everything else slots into place. Whatever you do, do it slow, be gentle with yourself, and do not think after a week, well I managed that so let's go full tilt. That will lead to crashing and burning and ain't no one want that.

Whatever you do, however you do it, good luck and I wish you the best!

Any questions? Lemme know in the comments!

Follow Joey to be kept up to date with the latest news regarding Joey and her books.

[lilyblackdrawside]

I played the Touhou 20 demo and have mixed feelings.

Overall it's good, the boss patterns are nice, though I'm not fond of the second boss's nonspells that stuff is a bit too encroachy for my liking.

The stage portions have been getting more aggressive as time has gone by. I recently replayed PCB and this game's level 1 bullet density on Normal feels like level 3 stuff in that game.

I don't like that the stones can show up in boss fights. Feels like it could really screw you over in a bad way when they add their own shots to a spellcard pattern.

I've never been fond of UFO's UFOs, because they're a gimmick that really demands your attention as opposed to working itself into gameplay passively, like DDC's collection border or any of the games that want you to be grazing for various reasons (SA, LoLK, HSiFS for example).

This game's stones show up when the vertical bar at the bottom left fills and then you have to deal with them. It seems to fill from picking up the gems that drop from enemies and from grazing, so it's just something that happens, and they come in four colours that seem to show up at different quantities based on how you play. I spent a lot of time in Focus Mode and got mostly reds, but then the gems in the thingy on the menu sidebar that presumably have an effect on my shots are also all red, so maybe it's because of that.

When you clear, you get a gem of some kind and can from then on slot it into one of the three options - Focus Shot, Wide Shot and Assist. I don't know what this does, but I don't like the idea of these stones presenting a persistent increase in power from having cleared the game several times. I don't like these kind of progression mechanics in these games. However, I'll see how it plays out when the full game comes out.

There's also another Trance mechanic that gives you a powerful shot for a while and also negates the next hit at the cost of ending early. It's alright. This one's governed by the vertical bar, which also probably fills up with gems but maybe differently compared to the horizontal one.

The horizontal one also gets longer the more stones it summons and changes colour, which seems to indicate what colour is going to be summoned, but I could swear it was red and I got a different gem once. It's difficult to pay attention to, since it's small in the corner where I really don't have much time to look at.

I'm also not a big fan of Marisa's shottype. I like it being all missiles, but this isn't it. Missiles only fire in straight lines, they don't wobble or go diagonal. The only spread you get from them is your options being spread out in non-focus mode. Also missile shottype shouldn't be using Master Spark. Lasers get Master Spark, Missiles get Stardust Reverie or whatever starry projectile spam Marisa thinks up for each game.

I really miss shottype selection. MoF, SA and UFO really were the high point of fun and weird shottypes. Don't even need unique dialogue or endings for each, I just want to play with a shitty shottype like Ultra Shortwave or something interesting like Cold Inferno again.

So yeah, it's alright but has some aspects I'm worried about.

[tu-es-gegg]

THIS IS VERY EARLY FOR ME TO THINK ABT THIS STUFF, THINGS MIGHT BE DIFFERENT IN THE COMING DAYS BUT I KINDA HAVE TO SAY IT BECAUSE IM THINKING ABT IT

I'm a bit scared abt how "the admin team is not going to intervene with creator's lore" bullet point is worded cause like I don't??? Know to what extent this goes. I might be bad at inferring what this means I just hope it doesn't mean literally leaving creators to their own devices 100%

Like there are some creators lore that's kinda dependent on admins and their coordination behind the scenes, for stuff like custom player models or NPCs interacting, little mentions in official federation things and integration into the full storyline of this whole quesadilla island. Like as much as 100% freedom in theory is great, you really need someone to try and corral the plot points to at least make sense or at least convene at certain points. Otherwise it's a whole lot of stuff that contradicts itself. They still need a DM or a few of them to supervise and lead the players down a proper path instead of them going hog ass wild. Otherwise you end up with parts that don't make sense, and people fucking up schedules

Not to beat the dead horse but dsmp kinda suffered from this sort of issue and they went about it in a really bad way from nlm onwards. From og lman to manberg it had more of a RPG feel and that was in part because there was still the strong main plot, the big event that everyone prepped for. And the subplots were plentiful and still could act as their own separate stories. But then things started to have their own separate scripts and people had to produce a lot of things themselves and then slot of storylines splintered away. Things felt too exclusive and it was all over the place. The magic of RP is gone because it relied to heavily on pre-made events and not about organic choices in response

A lot of magic of QSMP lore was kinda that ttrpg shit, event and response and allowing own growth. A lot of great character moments were like that (first example I can think of is well elquackity elections and maxhalo coordinating to get him out of the running, that last show was phenomenal). Another thing is that there is sort of a magic to players themselves theorising and strategizing with the situation, it gave us the Theory Bros then into Ordo Theoritas

I believe in qommunication smp though, I have faith the lore will be good, I've just been burned before and I know just how bad it feels (like I was a cfundy main I never win)

[thesecondsanctuary]

Started playing PS Outertale a few hours ago and I have, thoughts.

For the most part, geno has been a chill time. There are some tweaks I really appreciate, like the grinding being so quick and skipping dialog by holding C. Asriel was a little jarring at first, really did not like the way he talked down to Papyrus (and that bit where he's pretending Sans is still there? eugh), but once we were past not-Snowdin I really started to appreciate him. His relationship with Frisk/Chara/The Player/Whatever is really intriguing, especially how Frisk or whoever genuinely seems to reciprocate his feelings. Love the Best Friends Setting The World On Fire vibe we got going on.

I did kind of feel like the game was just, really easy? I beat Undyne the Undying without dying, and that's without knowing what the new spear attacks did. But a lot of her normal attack were just like, easier versions of her original attacks? I did like the extra attacking mechanic and how it was still loosely DDR esc like green soul mode.

Beat Mettaton on my second try. Orange soul mode was neat. A little weird to get used to but it didn't offend. Defiantly a little harder that Undyne but not a huge step up.

Alphys... I REALLY do not like this fight. As of writing this I have not beaten it and I don't thing I will. There are a just, lot of little things that just drag the whole thing down for me. For one, Screen Shake. Lasers shake the screen, the expanding rings shake the screen, hell, even the damn MUSIC shakes the screen! I can't see where I am or what I'm supposed to be dodging! Second, the obnoxious spinning background. It's distracting and bugs the hell out of me. Third, the music. It's very meh imo, gets grating after a bit and just sounds like noise now. So far my biggest issue is that her attacks are 1000 years long. Each one feels like three for four attacks in one. Sometimes I'd get most of the way through an attack and just, get fatigued and take my hands off the keyboard cause I'm so overwhelmed.

I've never felt like this before. I don't usually mind a challenge, I actually like throwing myself at a problem until I break through. I loved beating UTY geno without using any equipment (Only Rubber Bullets, the Patch and the Toy Gun. Honestly if you're looking to play UTY geno again but harder I highly recommend), and that was a grind that took weeks. But this? I have absolutely no desire to return to this. I can't honestly say the fight is even good or bad cause I just can't get into it. This is the worst time I've ever had fighting an UT boss, and I don't think that was the intention.

I don't know where I was going with this. I just had a lot of thoughts and felt the need to share them.

Fun fact u can hold alt+press left twice to open the debug menu and get temmie armour infinite hp etc etc would highly recommend using whenever a fight annoys u lol im not grinding for this game. I agree w ur alphys boss complaint so much, I almost got my ass beat WHILE using th temmie armour, the patience soul mode is just not made for a boss fight of that scale I don’t think, especially not one where it piles on what feels like 20 attacks in one turn. It’s so sad bc I was genuinely pretty hyped to see final boss alphys, seeing herself as the one to blame for everyone’s deaths in this route coulda made up for the nothingburger she was given in pacifist but it was just. Eh.

Also asriel is just very funny to me. This au really only cares abt asriel and twinkly seems to exist just to fill floweys slot which is smth I don’t care for, but I at least appreciate they let him be an edgy little shit rather than playing into the idea that having a soul would magically fix flowey/twinkly and make him a normal kid again. I like that frisk is kind of just fucking around ig, it makes a funny contrast against asriel. I wish the route used the frisk/asriel/mk trio more also. Idontknow I still haven’t fully figured out how I feel about this route it’s so weird. I did enjoy it more on average than lv0 pacifist tho so that’s. Something?

[hurricanrxna]

hello everyone!! welcome to the prologue of my new fanfic series featuring the miz and my original character dani! this idea has blossomed into my little labor of love recently and marries so many of my favorite things into a super mushy and emotional little package. I've been wanting to write a proper multi-chapter fic for such a long time, but the pressure of putting out really long chapters has always scared me off. recently though I decided to just bite the bullet because I was so inspired by this; screw my own internal pressure! 😂 so! here I am! each chapter will be accompanied by a short synopsis plus links to previous chapters and the master list!. for questions about the story or input or anything at all, please don't hesitate to send 'em in through my asks! I would love to hear all of your feedback ❤️

synopsis : every dream started somewhere. some just so happened to begin in a low-income apartment in California in 2002, where two people looked up at their grungy ceiling and dared to believe that together they could go farther than they had ever imagined. find the full story synopsis & masterlist here!

"Babe? You think I packed enough socks? 'Cuz I know I got fifteen pairs already but you never know." The chaotic sounds of clothes rustling and all manner of objects hitting the nearby dresser could be heard from the teeny half-kitchen just a few steps away, comically punctuating his words.

"Fifteen pairs, Mike?! You're going to orientation for two days not Mount Everest!" Dani shouted back with an unmistakable smile that seemed to melt into her voice. Though she was focused on the food in front of her, she was mostly just soaking in the moment to make sure she kept it slotted away in her mind forever.

Maybe part of it was because Dani knew that this was a turning point; something in her heart told her that.

When Mike had a dream and had a mission, he worked at it day and night until he didn't just earn it, he owned it. It's how he had gotten his shot in reality television, in front of the cameras where she knew he belonged. And while his time in television like that had been fun for both of them, it wasn't where his story was going to end. Dani knew that in her heart too.

Dani was there when Mike had decided to become a WWE wrestler. Like any other lost twenty-something, he was at a crossroads. And yet the path had opened up to him so easily, and it all took off from there. It was all moving so quickly, in fact, that Dani felt as though she was caught in a whirlwind. It was more enjoyable than anything, but she just hoped that she could hold on tight enough to stay on the ground by the end of it.

"Yeah, but you know how I am! Things just disappear around me sometimes; I swear I put something down here, then it's gone!" Mike's voice whisked Dani back to the present, thankfully just in time for her to rescue the mac and cheese. "Imagine the horror of me walking out there, first day of training, with one sock on."

"As if you wouldn't find a way to make that your gimmick or something," Dani cocked an eyebrow his way as she watched him saunter out of their bedroom, his hair still tightly gelled. "I think 'The Sockless Wonder' would get over great. I'd buy the t-shirt!"

Mike rolled his eyes in an attempt to seem unamused, though the huge grin that tugged at his lips gave it all away. A few steps more and he was standing closely behind Dani at the stove, wrapping his arms around her gently and pulling ever so slightly to ease her away from the tempting boxed meal.

"I'm allowed to steal that idea, right? Without crediting you at all? 'Cuz I'm gonna need the money." He chuckled as he rested his chin on her shoulder, kissing her jaw softly. Dani, never able to resist his charms even on the best of days, relented and leaned back a bit with a content sigh. The food would still be there when they got back, anyway.

"You credit me or I sue you, Mizanin. And where we're going, you'll be dealing with my very expensive and very morally dubious lawyers!" Mike let out a big laugh and in one smooth movement, grabbed Dani by the waist and pulled her onto the plush (discounted from a garage sale) fluffy rug below them. For a second he tickled her as revenge before laying down beside her, their fingers intertwined.

It was silent for a few minutes, so much so that Dani could feel her heart beating in her chest. She couldn't shake the feeling that they were standing on the precipice of something, a new beginning that she hadn't believed was possible. Both of them had grown up in small towns with the promise that they would live their lives just as their parents had. Dani had become content with that idea; Mike hadn't. His drive to be something greater than what anyone had thought he could accomplish was what Dani owed her ambition to.

"You feel that too?"

"Yeah. It's a lot."

"Scary?"

"No, not really. Not with you here." Mike turned to Dani and, for as long as she'd live, gave her a smile she'd never forget that she swore could end wars and bring about world peace. Okay, maybe that was a little dramatic. But it was still a smile she'd replay countless times over in her head for years. It said more than just excitement. More than just anticipation. It was a promise.

He then pointed to the ceiling with confidence and a goofy expression that made her laugh, almost like he was about to perform. "'Cuz when you see me come down that ramp one day, with the fireworks and the pyro and the crowd screaming, I'm not gonna be afraid of anything and you know why?" Mike leaned in closer to her as he waited for her response, making her chuckle.

"Why?"

"Because I'll have you there, right by my side. Because I'll know that I got to where I am because you never gave up on me. When everyone else didn't see me, you did. And I'll spend the rest of my life thanking you for that." Dani's breath hitched and she knew her next words were going to be all wonky and choked up while she tried to fight off tears.

If there was only a way to show him how much he meant to her, to show him that she loved him beyond any words she could speak.

"Then that's where I'll stay," she finally said, sniffling as she took his arm and held him as close as she could to her. "Right here next to you."

[frogsandfries]

It never stops lol

I got up this morning and gave my sister's male Maine Coon a bath, then took a shower myself. Got the adult dog outside, but once he saw the puppies and they saw him, the "walk" was over.

I cleared and wiped another part of the counter off.

Right now, I've got a savory pull-apart "bread" in the oven. The instructions on the recipe I used as my base were incomplete, so I cut my biscuits apart while I melted my butter, but then the bits got stuck together. I also used most of a jar of tomato basil pesto (if you like sun-dried tomatoes, this was fucking delicious just on toast), the remaining handful or so of bacon bits. We were out of any kind of cheese, so no cheese, just dried parmesan, oregano, garlic, and dried basil for good measure. I would've liked to mix everything together into a kind of sauce/coating. Next time, for sure.

The recipe called for onion. I roasted some onion the other day, but it was supposed to go with more peppers and tomatoes, so it's frozen into a solid mass right now, but roasted onion would've been amazing on this.

I also checked the chickens. Most days, with the size of their food and water containers, they don't need anything, but today when I was doing my head count, I noticed one of them was looking less good. We decided to separate her, but in a house full of cats and dogs, it was a trick to find a humane place to put her (like, we couldn't leave her in the dining room because my sister owns herding dog/puppies; the garage didn't seem like a kind place to put her because it's kinda gloomy, etc).

She's in my sister's room for now, but she is NOT pleased.

I'm also trying to get these new deadbolt sets out of my way, so I'm trying to put them in, but I can't figure out if there are supposed to be plates on both sides of the door/frame or if the previous owners were.....incorrect?? But at the same time, for example, I feel like my apartments always had a plate on both faces; on the other hand, the sets only come with one plate??? On the other-other hand, wtf even an I worrying about because the hole for the deadbolt on the door on which I'm working isn't even deep/long enough for this deadbolt aNyWaY‽¿!? So I have to find my drill and fucking drill out more space. My sister is concerned about the hole not being the right shape for the deadbolt, but if I use different sized bits for heater precision and make the extension a little bigger than it needs to be, it'll be fine. The real concern would be if I was carving/drilling this bolt hole from scratch.

Anyway, I love summer. I love feeling alert and energetic, but lately, maybe it's just looking after the puppies, but I only have so many spoon slots in a day and the puppies use up so many of them. I don't feel mentally depressed; I'm actually kind of frustrated that my body doesn't want to keep up.

I hope the allergy shots help. I know getting my weight down has really helped, and treating my blood pressure has also helped my overall health, but the impact of living in Wisconsin/so "far" north is counter-balancing my gains......

I honestly think, in my entirely unscientific theory, that my problem is some kind of systemic inflammation. Untreated high blood pressure causes inflammation. Chronic allergic responses cause inflammation. Inflammation can cause your bodily system to say "I'm sick; go into safe mode", which can impact existing depression (with which I've been dealing since I was a little less than eighteen). Basically, I'm hoping that treating allergic inflammation is the magic bullet.

But honestly? Honestly-honestly?

I've never been able to work as hard as my dad. I've never been able to work as hard as my friend from middle school. I've never been able to work as hard as my sister. And I'm really having to face this.

I keep saying, even disability would pay better, more consistently, than I could probably ever earn under my own steam. And that's saying something........ If only I "deserved" disability status.

I do not know what's wrong with me. Or....is it even me? I know a lot of people are really waking up to the fact that the capitalistic system that we're stuck in is really grinding us away.

Maybe in the grand scheme of hunter-gatherers and early agrarians, and even feudalism, I wouldn't have been that far off from normal. I almost certainly would've had more social support. If I'd made it to adulthood. But that's neither here nor there. I live in this world on this timeline, and I have to live in this plastic infested, polluted world with this body and I just have to figure it out......

I'm still trying. I'm still taking my blood pressure medication and eating better than I would living alone and getting more exercise than my cats would make me get. I'm still taking my brain drugs, and I'm trying to get a therapist to see me about my brain fuckery. And I'm still interested in getting into computers so that hopefully one day, I can make some small difference for children and child predators.

Until they take my Medicaid away, I'm going to keep chipping away at my health. All I can do is try.

[mediclzen]

something pulls at worn strings of his heart, bring life to where they ahd once ceased to feel and only there was an endless void of frost and numbed, festering anger.

Fondness that draws at the other's slight pause, how easy it was to douse Seox in an almost close to sleep state just from a touch like this – too much power that Nehan doesn't stop using, not when the touch itself felt pleasant against the ripples of burnt skin marks and gashes that somehow still had some feeling at his fingertips. It was more pleasant than knives, more pleasant than glass vials and cold chemicals. It was warm, alive.... and Seox's fur on those ears always sported a softness unlike any other.

'' He's growing. '' Says, ultimately. Because that's what it was. The twins cursed almost the same way he was, thrown into a war of adults, way too young and maturing too fast when in reality, they were still kids themselves - Tien who was the matriarch in a way with Feower as her shadow, or sometimes the other way around. Those fangs, these bullets all were for a reason, to protect themselves in a world that should've spared them better, spared the children of the withdrawal of Serenity Heaven he had to make to, also, survive...

There's sins he wont be able to erase, but Nehan has promised and dedicates all his time to undo all of that, to climb back to an unreachable ideal... seeing those children finally better was all he needed. This peace, this.... something intimate that Seox offers despise how much it took, how many attempts and awkward visits it had to be for Nehan to finally listen to his own heart besides the exhaustion and wish to vanish had been there.... '' Had it been any other time we both would be the end of those knives he holds proudly. Now at best he just judges us. '' Adds after that wishful pause, humming out the words like a dulcet honey.

Coming home.... It is written in many books that sometimes home is not a physical place. It's a person, a community, somewhere the heart feels like it belongs. Mugen's heart needed Nehan's presence. His comatose state rendering the Draph boy almost despairing despise Nehan's own wish to vanish, to let the crew take him to a much better life when in reality Mugen wanted that, but also if it meant Nehan could be there too.

Eyelid looks down at the other once more, where he studies the Erune's visage. Nothing's changed - he's the same. Same birthmark, same hair if not of it being unkempt from hours of work and sweat. Things Nehan doesn't mind... in reality it was a good excuse to keep on his soft onslaught, the tender touch, letting his hand press on the visible shoulder while he adjusts a bit his waist to let the other arm drape around him. '' My doors are open, the same way you kept prodding me with your stubborness - I know you often asked tien or feower about me when... I secluded myself. At the time it only made me feel fed up - unable to dicern why you'd care. ''

'' but I kind of get it too. Had it been the other way around, even among all the fizzled anger I felt, I would've checked on you, left once you woke up – hope to the stars we'd met again despise feeling it'd be better we never crossed paths. '' to which, Nehan more n more allows himself to shift a bit where he sits, sinking into the bed while keeping Seox's embrace around him, all until he slots just close for foreheads to touch. '' What I want to say– It's... I kind of feel at home, too. This closeness, this touch, your unrivaled perseverance against the imposible... It's hard to say no to it once I've experienced it. ''

‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍he's always weak to that touch in particular — ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍when he traces his beauty marks as if they were beautiful. like they're stars that paint his skin. ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍it makes him melt, much like many of Nehan's other gentle touches do.

‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍he feels a swell of warmth within his chest, and in a moment of weakness, he cannot help but nuzzle in close to him, an arm bending at the joint to wrap around his back and give a soft squeeze of his own.

‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍he cannot fathom the things he does to Seox's weak heart. ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍

‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ `` You're right... ``

‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍said after a slight pause, seemingly used to remember what the conversation was about to begin with. ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍it was... admittedly easy to lose track of, when such tenderness was offered so generously. ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍he was a fool. a hopeless fool. ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍happily so.

‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ `` I don't mind it, of course... ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍It's something that I've seen brings Feower some sense ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍of peace. I've never witnessed him so docile, in fact. ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍Years ago... He had similarly hated me. Given the ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍chance to go for my throat, he readily took it. ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍And I didn't blame him back then.

‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍Now... Things are different, obviously. ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍Even if it's just lending a hand in this way, the fact that ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍he trusts me to do that much means something. ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍That, and he doesn't scoff at me like he used to.

‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍It feels like... Even that is a small step forward than ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍where I was before. ``

‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍his eyes fall shut now, every muscle in his body going slack. ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍it was... comfortable. hearing the night's breeze brushing past the outer frame of this borrowed space. ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍talking about the way things where and how they'd become.

‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍of course, it's not without its strife. ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍but his heart doesn't feel heavy when he looks back on it.

‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ `` ... But I do prefer coming back here at my normal times, ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍if I can help it. ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍It feels like... Returning home.

‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍I have my duties to the Eternals, ones to the crew... ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍But my heart has its own to you. `` ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍‍ ‍‍‍‍‍‍ ‍‍‍‍ ‍

[phantom-of-the-501st]

So I just rewatched "Entombed" and I enjoyed it a lot more this time round.

(Post will contain some spoilers)

It's still not one that I love, but I had a better time watching it now that I've had time to sit on it. I think my main problem with it the first time round was that I had certain hopes that just weren't met and rather than accepting it for what it was, I accepted it as a failed attempt of what I wanted it to be. I normally try to avoid watching things with that attitude but clearly that didn't work out so much last week.

I definitely don't think it's perfect but it is a lot of fun and I can appreciate it more now.

I'm just gonna leave a few more bullet pointed thoughts down below to add on to what I said last week.

I still wish we had gotten more Echo content this episode, but I do understand a bit better why he is the way he is this episode (or at least, what makes sense to me looking back at it).

Hunter and Echo looking really exhausted this episode is actually really interesting and I do hope we touch more on that in other episodes.

Wrecker is adorable but we all knew that. 🥰

Didn't bring this up last week, but can we appreciate the planet design? We haven't really had a "spooky trees" aesthetic but I like it. 👻

I still believe that the rockfall was a genre stereotype moment that they used just to get 3 of them out the way for one scene, but it didn't make me annoyed like it did last week.

I found myself lowkey obsessed with the dust animation this episode.

Going backwards a bit, why are none of us mentioning the fact that Phee was pushing around the lowest rock dial thing by herself but when Tech did it, he had to enlist the help of Wrecker? Basically, I'm convinced Phee could probably knock someone out cold because she is stronger than she looks.

Every time I see them hanging off of things I feel bad for Echo. Poor guy's got his entire body weight hanging off one hand. 😭

So this weird mech thing has a stone that activates it. When it's in one slot the creature is dormant. When it's taken out the mech activates. When it's put in a different slot the stone melts and the mech self-destructs.

Weird design but okay.

It looked cool so I'll let them off on whatever weird activation system they decided to install in this thing.

I love seeing Omega interacting with other women in her life. She's surrounded by men all the time but having Phee around gives her a little bit more freedom to have time outside of her little bubble with her brothers.

Also, I've seen some complaints that this episode undoes Omega's character development. I personally don't think it does. At the end of the day, she's still a child and this episode let's her be the kid she never truly got to be on Kamino. ❤

And I feel like Hunter's insecurities about losing Omega and his struggles with watching her grow up are going to become much more prevalent later.

I feel like I had more thoughts than this while watching it but I don't remember what they were. 😐

Overall, I just embraced this episode for what it was this time round: a fun Indiana Jones style adventure. Nothing overly complex or deep. Just fun. And while I loved that in episode 4, for some reason I had a problem vibing with ep 5 when it first came out. But I enjoyed it a lot more this time round.

I'm not sure this episode will ever be one of my favourites, and it'll probably stay pretty low on the ranking for me, but seeing as there is no episode of TBB that I hate, I'm okay with that.

°•°•°•°

Less than 12 hrs to go until episode 6, "Tribe"!

Either we finally get more Echo next episode or we don't. Either way I will become incredibly annoying so prepare for that! 🤣

[athela-3]

After… oh goodness, how many months??—I finally remembered that I still had not done Zhongli's second story quest. Which means, yes, I've only faced Azhdaha for the first time this weekend, despite having played since before the update introducing him even dropped 😬

I have also, since the same version update, been a Zhongli main pretty much nonstop.

This made doing the story quest a bit… surreal.

(Also, what follows is just my rambling, for my own posterity's sake. You have been warned~)

Let's bullet point this as usual, shall we?

(Cutscene begins as the Traveller approaches Zhongli) Oh no. Oh, no, this is so weird. I feel like there's two of me. I've never seen both of you at the same time in ages! Except for that one bugged quest.

(Zhongli: You appear to have taken his claim quite personally on my behalf.) That's because I'm no longer sure who the player character is by now! I mean, I can't talk for Paimon, but I'm having trouble!

*spends the entire first chapter of the quest mumbling that this is all so surreal; for these past nine months I've only ever seen him when he's "me", and suddenly he's standing right there next to the Traveller and my brain forks out an error message*

Aw, I wish Kun Jun sticks around. Let the old man have a geologist buddy!

Wait, I thought you needed a geologist? This is a missing persons case! Why aren't you calling the Millelith?!

Detective Zhongli is on the case!!

[No, seriously: I love mysteries. Grew up on detective fiction. So to see him suddenly turn into a whole detective at the drop of a hat… as if I didn't like him enough already!]

Now I'm definitely glad to have him on my team. To see him personally walk around the scene, examining the clues and interviewing the witnesses, that feels Right. Now when he shows up in cutscenes, it's no longer surreal, it makes perfect sense~

(Most of the quest proceeds in an orderly fashion. The mystery segment has totally loosed me from the previous confusion by giving me something more pressingly intriguing to consider, until…)

*start of the Azhdaha battle, trying to switch to Zhongli but ending up with Childe instead*

…eh?

EHHHH???

No no no no I forgot they give trial characters, they overwrote my Zhongli with their own, what's he—level 82, Vortex Vanquisher, c3, 4pc Noblesse???

Noooooo give my own Zhongli back!! Childe will take forever! He's my main DPS and now my team doesn't have a proper DPS! GIVE ME BACK MY SENSEI!

Hhhh I'm gonna need food buffs for this…

Tch—and they moved him to slot 4! He's always slot 1! Gah!!

I'd rather have my measly shields but big NA damage than this!

(I survived. Somehow. Had to use Adeptus' Temptation to boost up my half-built Childe's dmg [other party members were Thoma and Albedo, also not fully built and all three at lv 70], and poor Childe had to eat HP recovery food at least three times because either Azhdaha really hits That hard, or the trial Zhongli's shields were surprisingly fragile. And this coming from someone accustomed to that shield only being able to take 5k dmg!)

Hey look, I can't get past the barrier, but I can spawn my pillar inside!

(Zhongli immediately hits me with his osmanthus wine idle, causing me to leave the arena at once. It is not an idle you wanna hear in Azhdaha's arena…)

Seriously though… what was that build? 4pc Noblesse is a buff support set, but his ult isn't even on often enough for it to really be useful. He's c3, so two pillars and can shield up via meteor, so you'd think they'd give him more ER or something. But he also has VV, and innit that a DPS kinda thing? Also, didn't they change his first story quest weapon to Homa recently? Why is it still VV here? Why—

[authorjoeypaul]

PLANNING YOUR TIME If you ask a lot of my friends, they'll tell you that I'm organised. I have a set plan for when I do things, and I, generally, stick to it bar any major setbacks. I have my planner, and before that I had sticky notes, and I would make sure that I knew what I was supposed to be doing and when. I would fairly agree with that sentiment, I have always been someone who likes to plan things out, except when it comes to planning novels, on that I lean more the other way. So many people have asked how I got into planning my time, and for me it was a little bit of luck, a little bit of boredom, and a little bit of just finding a new program on my computer that I could use for fun. I'd always admired people who did lovely spreads in a bullet journal, but that was never going to be me. I needed some kind of setup for me to manage things in a planner. Of course then I found the perfect planner for me, and from there it kinda all snowballed. But way back when, I started small, it's something I've talked about before, people always think you can jumpstart with a full spread of what you're doing and when, and I've found that is so not the case! I started off with a to-do list, and it would be for the week. I would lay out all that I needed to get done, and then go from there as to when it would get done. At the time I was still getting my degree so that was always priority number one. Writing kinda fell by the wayside. Of course, then when I finished my degree, I kinda drifted through writing stuff. Some weeks I'd get everything done, some weeks I'd get nothing done. This was a mixture of being lazy, and also because I didn't have the structure that I needed. I would have all these things, but I didn't have a writing routine, and it was mostly, a when I feel like it kinda thing. If you haven't guessed, I'm not really that kind of person. The weekly to-do became fortnightly, then monthly, and then I started to get serious with myself. I found sticky notes and I told myself that I would work out on what days I would do what. My point isn't to say that you have to be strict with yourself, you know your life better, you know how your minds works best, but for me, that was the only way I was going to get everything done. I still use a monthly to-do list, but whereas before it would have four chapters for each book and two bonus ones, now it's at six for each book and four bonus ones. I increased it gradually when I realised that I was exceeding my goals every single month without fail. So when it comes to sitting down to make your own plan, start small. Don't overload your plate and think that you're going to be able to knock everything off your list. Unless you're someone who works extremely well under pressure, then you will fail and it'll knock you back. I did this with the weekly to-do list, I put everything on it and expected myself to go from hardly ever writing, to always writing, and it did not work like that. It took me a number of years to get to the point where I was crossing things off consistently, and there's no shame in that. If you need to start small and take your time to build up in it, that's okay, not everyone will slot into a new routine instantly. I have friends who have started on one small portion of their life, getting that routine down, and then branching out to start on another small portion, taking it on slowly so that they can learn how to juggle it all together, and this is a great way of doing it. It allows you to work out the kinks before you start trying to do it in all areas of your life. So start small, don't bite off more than you can chew, and be ready for it to take time. Any thoughts? Lemme know in the comments below!

Follow Joey here on her blog, or on Facebook or Tumblr to be kept up to date with the latest news regarding Joey and her books

[sally-mun]

Unsurprisingly on my mind due to TKP's blog going through it, I've been meaning to ask (if just to clarify) about if any details from the "Enerjak Reborn" saga ever slip into your universe, even if clearly can't happen due to the characters' relationships. A part of me assumes that the idea you mentioned of Locke becoming the threat he prophesized sounded like the most likely direct replacement for that, but I wonder if any other ideas end up still mimicking it?

First of all, I fucking love your username and as far as I’m concerned you DID decide on a good one.

Anyway, this is an interesting bit of the storyline because it’s in that nebulous place where my partner and I agree that it happened, but we’ve never actually hammered out exactly what happened. For the most part, the bullet points of Finitevus tricking Knuckles into getting hexed and Locke sacrificing himself to release him are agreed to have been in the RP’s backstory, but given the version of Locke that I wrote for the Brotherhood, I’m sure the tone of the situation was very different. I can only imagine what the situation looked like through Locke’s eyes, honestly. In some ways you could argue that Knuckles becoming Enerjak IS the realization of everything Locke worked for, so that begs the question of whether or not he would see that as his premonition coming true. It’s hard to say given that there’s so many other events that have happened leading up to this point that would’ve also gone differently based on the new circumstances, and some that probably didn’t happen all together.

However, here’s my immediate hunch:

1) The events of S3&K definitely happened in the RP’s backstory, although again I’m sure several events played out in different ways. The great point to this is that, as WE all know, this was the fulfillment of the mural that Locke saw on the wall in Hidden Palace, which unknowingly inspired his recurring dream. Locke, however, would’ve taken the arrival of Eggman and the Death Egg with a lot more confusion. Obviously this is the level of threat his premonition insisted upon, but Knuckles wasn’t the one to ultimately defeat it! Some ground-dwelling heathen actually took care of it!!! So no matter how much the situation would seem to fulfill the slot of the Great Evil, it obviously can’t be because Knuckles did not ascend to become the Savior in order to stop it.

2) It’s probably safe to say this cycle happened a few others times, because let’s face it, Angel Island has seen some shit. I don’t think the others probably ever compared to S3&K arc, though, both in terms of the impact it made on the situation (and Locke’s psyche) and the fact that the enemy just plain looks like the figure in Locke’s dreams.

3) This would probably mean that an already paranoid Locke is getting jumpier and jumpier every time a new threat arises, because by now there’ve been so many BIG bad events that he’s probably constantly worrying, “Is this the Great Evil?? IS THIS THE GREAT EVIL??” and his already frayed nerves are probably completely shot.

4) So imagine, then, when Knuckles -- Locke’s only pride and joy, for whom he sacrificed absolutely everything in his life and has been banking on saving everyone’s lives -- seems to have become the Great Evil himself. It’s not enough that he’s powerful on an otherworldly scale and seems to have gone mad with said power; the bigger shock is that Knuckles does, indeed, seem to be fulfilling the criteria of his premonitions. He’s not just terrorizing the rest of the world (which, let’s be honest, Locke probably doesn’t even care about), he’s also terrorizing echidnas. He left Echidnaopolis in ruins by forcibly removing the entire population, and he’s destroying a lot of lives by changing their bodies against their will. The entire echidna species is terrified of what he has become, and what else he might do. Maybe the fact that the Great Evil was enormous in Locke’s dream wasn’t about literal physical scale, but rather, a representation of the enormity of the threat that’s posed.

5) In a perfect world, I’d really like to imagine that this finally, FINALLY, brings Locke a desperately needed moment of clarity. Locke got to the state he ends up in because he’s so afraid of some ambiguous and unidentifiable threat, so maybe the fact that he now CAN identify the threat could be enough to raise that fog. Maybe seeing Knuckles as the evil they need to be protected from will finally be enough to jolt Locke back to reality, and allow him to see just how bad his decisions have been and how Knuckles’ state is, honestly, a very logical conclusion to the chain of events that came before it. Knuckles becoming the Great Evil was always a possibility all along, but Locke was so convinced of the contrary that he just literally couldn’t see it. Now he can see it. Now he can grasp how, no matter how well-intentioned he was, he absolutely, 100%, undeniably caused his son to become the one thing he’s feared all along.

6) If Locke is able to have that moment, and think completely clearly again for even a brief time, then I have no doubt whatsoever that Locke would make that sacrifice to save him. No attempts to find an alternative, no hemming and hawing, no attempts to get everyone to kill Knuckles like in the comic, NONE of that shit. If Locke, the REAL Locke that’s been lost inside the madness all this time is able to wake up for just a few moments, emerges again and learns that the only way to save his boy from the fate he himself unwittingly doomed him to is for someone to give up their own life, Locke would make that sacrifice in a heartbeat. He said back on the day he activated the chaos bath that he wished he could take Knuckles’ burdens away and put himself in his place. This would be one way to do exactly that, to give Knuckles a shot at a real, normal life again, and to atone for the enormous mistakes he made that caused this tragedy.

I think if the situation arose under those sorts of circumstances, it would just make Locke’s sacrifice all the more meaningful. Allowing him to not only realize that he’s the one that ultimately caused all this, but to fully admit to it AND take responsibility without being harangued into doing so completely changes the tone of what he does. It’s not a situation where Locke sees sacrificing himself as something that has to be done, but something that should be done, to atone for his wrongdoings and save the one person he loves more than anyone or anything else in this world.

I don’t see the Locke of the comics as someone who would die for his child without the slightest hesitation, even after more skillful writers get a hold of him; I don’t see the fact that he does so unrealistic, but I honestly think the only reason he does it is because he can’t think of a way out of it. I mean, for fuck’s sake, shortly before doing so he was campaigning TO HAVE KNUCKLES KILLED. I think canon!Locke loves Knuckles in his own weird way, but I think his love for Knuckles comes second to his love for himself, and it always has. Canon!Locke is just simply too arrogant to think of someone else first, even his own child.

Locke the way I write him, however, was always ready to die so that Knuckles could live. It used to be because he felt Knuckles was too important to their people and needed to live to save them, but when all that baggage is lifted, Locke would still die for him simply because he loves him. He would die for him to make his life better, to free him from the prisons he’s been confined to both physically and mentally, to allow him to fully live. He’d die to save his son because he wants him to finally have the life he deserves -- that he always deserved. If the price of Knuckles being happy, healthy, and free is Locke giving up his life, there’d be no force on Mobius that could’ve kept him away from the Master Emerald to do it.

I don’t know if this is quite the sort of answer you were looking for, but again, this was the first impulse that came into my brain. It feels right to me, and probably would be worth exploring in a story sometime. Maybe someone could commission me for it or something, who knows. In the meantime, I hope this paints the picture as well as I’m seeing in my head.

[justhereforfanfiction]

Lost - Logan x MC

Angst, approximately 2, 500 words.

Hi. This is my first ever fanfiction, so any feedback is welcome! Although I haven't posted any fanfictions on there other than this one, I will likely branch out from Choices on Wattpad and if you are interested in that, maybe you could look at my account? It's @ GalaxyGirl20671! Again, feedback including constructive criticism is welcome, and I hope you like it! I think it helps 'set the mood' if you do listen to the song, but in no way do you have to! I hope you enjoy. 😊

I know I didn't use every lyric but that's because I didn't want to use repeated lines in case it became repetitive.

Song - Lost by Freya Ridings

*I know I use 'Ellie' in this instance but it just represents the MC - to me, it feels a bit detached to use 'Y/N' - but feel free to self-insert if you wish! :)*

 'Standing on the platform, watching you go...'

Ellie stood at the turn - in at the end of her block, watching as a sleek, black-striped yellow sports car slid out of its slot into the street. Almost as easy as it had come into her life, she supposed, on that less-than-fateful day. But she knew that that was not the case, just as she knew the boy whose spark plug necklace was slipped under her t-shirt, guarding her rapidly beating heart.

'It's like no other pain I've ever known'

That same heart ached at even the concept of him leaving her side, yet somehow there the reality was painted, harsh and monochrome against the bold, colourful canvas of what had been her hopes and dreams for the two of them. Although with him, those dreams could have been driving around the city or sat in some reincarnation of his loft eating takeout from Kelso's, and it would still make her feel as though she was graduating from a hundred- no, a thousand - Langstons. Her sense of loss was so strong it manifested itself as physical pain - a common symptom of undergoing stress, she seemed to remember from one of their late-night 'study sessions', the knot in her stomach tightening at the fond, soon-to-be-bittersweet memory.

'To love someone so much, to have no control...'

Ellie could still feel her whole body pulse gently, perhaps not entirely from her emotions (although those threatened to overwhelm her), but from the intensity and fierceness of their last embrace before he left. That had been out of her hands, he had wanted to keep her safe - but her father pulling a gun on him only pushed the situation further out of her grasp. It seemed she had come full circle - from her cop father controlling her life to her breaking free, her forgiving him again, and back to him commanding the one thing she loved beside him; the boy with the car. Couldn't she have one untarnished goodbye out of the many to remember him by, without someone accusing them of something? Ellie's dad had only been trying to protect her, and she knew that - but her first everything had been putting HER first as well, being noble for Gods' sake! Even if it didn't feel like it to her...

'You said "I wanna see the world", and I said "Go"'

The look on his face had told Ellie one thing, yet his mouth spoke another. He had known she had plans for the future, and to him, he was getting in the way of those. With his words, he gently retracted himself from her life. He had been 'just some kid you caused trouble with in high school' to her father undoubtedly, but in Ellie's heart, she knew he was so much more. However, while he was saying that, his arms drew her in and she had melted into his touch. The sound of his car engine seemed to call out decidedly that his words had signified his true intentions.

'I think I'm lost, without you'

Without him, Ellie didn't know who she should be anymore. He was the one who brought her into this life, who brought out this side of her. Every time she had been brave, or confident, or even remotely bold, it had been because of him, directly or otherwise? Whoever thought she'd dance at a secret warehouse rave? Or pass her driving test? Or even talk to Ingrid as an equal in any way other than academics? Going back to her old self felt as difficult as trying to separate water from the sand without filter paper. "Be the real you. the one that was always waiting to come out" he had said. She wanted to so badly, but how could she do that when so much of that person was based on him? It was just like Colt had said - every time she gets behind the wheel she will remember them and the year she had spent.

'I just feel crushed without you'

Ellie's emotions weighed down on her like the heavens on Atlas the Titans' shoulders. Whenever they had been driving or executing one of Kanaeko's master plans with the rest of the MPC, she had enjoyed - no, loved - his company, yet now she realised that once the others were gone he had been the one she needed the most of all of them. And now he was about to be gone, leaving her with a stolen car that Toby wasn't here to patch up, and the memories of fleeting touches long since past.

'I've been strong for so long, I never thought

how much I needed you'

Even when he had left after teaching her to fight, Ellie had not felt it with the same note of finality that this moment held. She had always thought there was a possibility - however small - of seeing him one last time. And now, even though she wished it desperately, Ellie knew he wasn't coming back. This time, too much was on the line.

'Strangers rushing past, just trying to get home.'

In the not-so-far distance, Ellie could hear the steady stream of LA traffic that the boy she loved would soon enter. She wondered - would they know a wanted street racer was cruising down the freeway amongst them? That that drive was breaking two hearts and would damage at least one more before the night was out? Nobody knew where he was going, however, not even Ellie. Her best guess was back to Detroit, but Ellie guessed that not even he knew where he would wind up tomorrow morning. Even that one suggestion could have been some sort of plot to make sure she didn't worry about him (although she would nonetheless) or found where he was. He knew her better than anyone, after all. She would only have agreed to Mona's terms if he had reiterated them.

'But you were the only safe haven that I've known'

Those words were true enough. Despite her father claiming to support her in everything she did, the one thing Ellie never knew she wanted had been right under her nose, kept away from her by the one who 'only wanted her to be happy'. Sure, Ellie understood that Grand Theft Auto wasn't exactly a conventional - or indeed safe- pastime, but not teaching her to drive only meant that once Ellie wanted to learn, she was dangerously inexperienced anyway! And look where that got her. With her driving license, of course (since Ellie, as her dad loved to brag, "succeeded in everything she put her mind to"), but with her friends a now orphaned teen with what seemed to be a world (or at least city) domination problem, a hardened criminal currently in hospital, soon to be jail with a bullet through her side because of her, and two mechanic - slash racers on the run, and a boyfriend (well, would-be, since they never defined the relationship, but an ex now involuntarily)being forced by her dad to leave the country at gunpoint.

The boyfriend who had taught her how to drive. Who had cared about her over the safety of his crew, or even being put in jail. Who had guided her through her first... everything, really. First kiss, first car, first heist - whenever Ellie needed him, he was there. And most importantly, she could say next to anything around him and he would listen and give advice without judgement. Even though she had missed the comfort of her bed whilst residing in his loft, that boy was - and Ellie had a feeling always would be - where her heart lived.

'Hits me at full speed, 

Feels like I can't breathe 

And nobody knows'

As soon as the key had turned in the ignition, the Devore roaring to life, Ellie's breath had been knocked out of her as fast as if her car could have accelerated from 0 to 100 in a nanosecond. All she wanted to do was scream and howl at the sky, to God, to anyone who would listen to try and get them to rewrite fate so that they could be together. She wanted to cry to Riya, but she knew that her best friend no matter how much they had in common would just take her to get ice cream and tell her 'these things heal in time'. She wanted to collapse at her mothers' feet as she frequently did in her dreams, but the tightness of the heirloom bracelet at her wrist reminded Ellie that that was impossible.

Most of all, however, she wanted her fathers' understanding; that she loved and had lost just as he had all those years ago. She remembered when her dad had met him for the first time properly, the anger he had wielded towards the boy who had put her in so much danger - who had saved her from it just as many times. The disbelief on his face as she explained that she loved this 'bad boy', this 'adrenaline junkie'  as she was sure her father addressed him in his mind. How the initial shock had moulded into fury at whatever 'trick' he was sure this criminal must have worked on his daughter. No, Ellie was sure he wouldn't understand for at least the next week or so.

'This pain inside me

My world is crumbling

I should have never

Let you go'

The first tear of what was to be many rolled down Ellie's already mascara-striped face as she fell to her knees. Her dad looked at her in surprise as she screamed in the middle of the street, and could see an identical tear roll down the face of the boy inciting it as he drove past the old man, wincing in guilt as the sound of his ride or die's anguish reached his ears. Had it maybe been the wrong thing to do? Had he maybe... underestimated the intensity of the teenagers' emotions? Undoubtedly, but he had to protect his daughter from going down the wrong path.

Ellie's jaw tightened as her father dared to look vaguely upset at the situation. He was the one worsening it after all. It was almost shameful of him to have judged her (literal) partner in crime so quickly. After all, when had he ever hurt her with bad intentions at heart? Ellie realised that her anger was not directed towards her father, but rather towards herself for allowing this to happen. She couldn't have stopped him leaving, but she could have made sure they were farther out of her dads' line of sight so they would have a chance of a 'proper' goodbye, whatever that was;  the one year had spent with him and the crew had felt far more meaningful than any of the 18 she had gone through alone, to the point where the mere thought of goodbye was heartbreaking.  And she had simply let him be treated in that way by her kin?

'I've been strong for so long, I never thought

How much I love you'

Earlier in the evening, once she had dispelled all of her nervous energy, her mind had been solely focused on bringing Shaw and The Brotherhood down. But once that had come to pass, her emotions had hit her like a ton of bricks. The Mercy Park Crew had no reason to stick around now Teppei was dead; it was time to find a new gang. For Colt and Mona, leaving had not been a choice. The latter's injury and the formers' determination to build his name in LA's criminal underworld saw to that. Saying goodbye to each of them had been no easy task, and she had half expected him to have skipped town already, to save them both the heartbreak of saying goodbye. But that had not been the case, as he had stepped out of the darkness to say one final farewell. 

Tears had soaked Ellie's skin at the words he spoke, as they did now as he drove away. Her guard had been up during the heist, channelling her anger and determination to have Jason put behind bars, along with Detectives Wallace and Hester. But when she was around the crew, those she considered close enough to be family, Ellie had broken down. She had been fierce and brave then; that had been to cover up her paralysing fear of losing them again. Of losing herself again. His goodbye had hurt the most, like a slap to the face, short and painful but with lasting effects.

Throughout the brief conversation, their relationship had played through her mind; not just from her perspective, but what it must have been like for him.  How on that day, what seemed to be casual flirting and general friendliness must have been tiptoeing through a minefield for him. A single wrong move and the whole crew could be placed at risk. The initial shock and rush when driving from the cops leading to the beginning of their relationship. How in each moment Ellie fell deeper in love with him, he was doing the same, only that feeling of freefalling was paired with the guilt of tricking her, and the fear of letting her in at the risk of his emotions and her safety - concerns which were not calmed by certain complications they had run into along the way. This myriad of memories only emphasised the emptiness Ellie felt in her heart now.

'Standing on the platform, watching you go.

You said, "I wanna see the world" and I said "Go"'

As Ellie felt the tarmac of the sidewalk dig into her knees and tears roll down her face, she watched as the car she knew so well turned into the next street. When the car swung around, she caught a glimpse of its driver, his eyes trained on hers, smiling weakly through tear-filled eyes. Regret was written undeniably in his gaze, but he was trying to put on a brave face for her to remember him by. Trademark. A thought that once would have put a grin on Ellie's face now caused her to sob in sorrow, grieving the little moments that comfortably passed between them that she was sure could not be replicated with anyone else. She shot him back a brief smile, equally bittersweet in the less than perfect moment, and the last words he said to her echoed in her mind.

"Give 'em hell, troublemaker"

His car finally moved out of sight, and Ellie suddenly felt the repressed need to call out for him spring out in full force; now that her father had walked inside she felt less pressured to avoid the elephant in the room, at least out loud.

"Logan..." she choked out to no one in particular, as she rubbed her road marked knees the way he would have done and slowly got up.

Later, after she had deleted their messages from her phone and laid in her bed in silence, she took off the necklace from around her neck and placed it on the adjourned pillow. "Logan." Ellie whispered to herself as if in the affirmation that he had been real.

She had been lucky to know him. Too bad there wasn't a next time to be ready for.

[gildedstarbaker]

for destiny 1 it was definitely my hard mode elulim's frenzy from KF, just something about the way it felt and looked made it a heavy i almost never took off unless a raid or something required it. not to mention it having 2 rounds back when legendary rockets could do so without needing a separate perk as well as the intrinsic cocoon perk on the KF weapons made it such a fun heavy to just whip out and blast a group of enemies with. not to mention cluster bombs are always fun.

whereas uh destiny 2 is a bit of a more difficult story. because it has changed over time through expansions which makes sense so even if it maybe kinda goes against the rules im going to just show all the ones i've used over the years that were like the gun for my guardian.

for year 1 it was my beloved duty bound that for some reason just really captured me when i first got it from a nightfall all those years ago. maybe it had something to do with how much i grinded for it or how it looked visually or maybe it was because it had rampage back when it was still very desirable, i'm not 100% sure! but the kill count doesn't lie about my usage! of said gun!

year 2 was chattering bone and honestly? i don't really remember why i liked it so much! it was kinda a similar case as duty bound where i just got it and it just felt right. not to mention it was a really cool looking gun from one of the best raids in d2.

year 3 onwards i was kind of weapon switching a lot but a lot of the time i would just use huckleberry because... well its huckleberry! 30 rounds of fast firing SMG bullets that gets all bullets back after a single kill is huge, not to mention the fact that it comes with rampage. it's simply just an amazing gun and is still worth using.

and then after huckleberry fell out of my usage i didnt really have a gun i would always use until i got my wastelander which was pretty much a permanent weapon in all my loadouts especially when energy weapons started becoming very good alternatives with some of the perks they started getting. i just love how it looks visually and it having that trademark tex mechanica flip animation that happens when you take the weapon out and reload it is just the cherry on top.

and now only very recently outbreak prime has become a massive comfort gun for me after i picked it up again a couple seasons back. just everything about that gun is so amazing. the sound, the recoil, the aesthetic, the perks my god the perks are so amazing!! stacking damage on enemies that you headshot that synergizes with other outbreak primes and outlaw hello??? the gun can fit into pretty much every activity in the game with how versatile and solid it is. if i don't know what weapon to put on for something i can pretty much always just look towards outbreak and then fill the other weapon slots with what i might be missing in terms of elements or anti-champion mods! its simply such an incredible gun and i am SO HAPPY it finally got a good ornament.

jeez thats a lot of text. i apologize for everyone who follows me as this absolutely explodes onto your dash. please forgive me (praying hands emoji)

Guardians, what is YOUR weapon?

Im NOT asking which is your best weapon to clear a room or kill a god. I’m asking which one you would NEVER delete even if it’s not the best or even very good. I don’t care if it’s an exotic, legendary, a rare or even uncommon or common OR EVEN IF IT WAS SUNSET. I don’t care if it’s super popular or a weapon nobody knows about.

Which weapon out of your entire arsenal feels like it’s YOURS? Like it’s special and unique and that it only feels right in your hands? The one weapon you would call a true friend if it was a person.

Reblog with your answer and maybe a pic and explanation of why you feel that way about it.