#tiny processor
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Children of Elysium
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grated 2 lbs of cheese. this is what life is all about
#not by hand bc it would've taken 14 million years i used the food processor but. still. it was very fun#now i have two containers of shredded cheese sitting in the fridge and im gonna make mac and cheese w them....mmmmmmm😍😍#thabk u tini for this life changing recipe i truly have not been the same since i tried it#bee.txt
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not me getting mad at ao3 going down while i'm rereading my own fic. as if that's an issue. when its. all on my computer anyway
#i just like it being on ao3 for rereading tho#if i read it in my word processor#it feels like i'm writing or editing#when i look at it in the ao3 page it feels finished#(even tho i still constantly find typos/tiny continuity errors no one would notice but me)#(at least i HOPE no one would notice them......)#fic stuff#d
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theres something to be said about how upper class cultural norms, standards and practices imitate bug behaviour, from the wasp behaviour of swarming and attacking other animals living spaces until they die or leave so the wasps can take it for themselves to how spiders digest their food externally before they eat it
#thinking about those videos of the kardashians shaking their salad in plastic tubs#and those all liquid diets#and all of the food processors#also the very tiny servings in high end restaurants#and “polite table ettiquete”#and the salad fork#and the deconstructed/reconstructed foodie movement#also colonialism & gentrification but thats a given#also that one time i saw a woman in a fur coat wrap up a small dog in a combination of her stomach bile and what looked like gauze
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........ okay fine
i am re-reinstalling windows =)
#cringeposting#this time deleting everything (:#if it gets frozen again even at least once afterwards while being all clean it means processor is a few steps away from death#or motherboard#or both#i know they are both super old obsolete etc#hopefully i am right in my guesses and its a tiny bite of the virus hidden in disk d#besides corrupted files are super likely a thing in there as well#cant ever be too paranoid#i have made all possible backups and put them in different places offline and online#but they are still just about 10% of what i got here#well#okay#rereinstalling windows arc
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so many recipes soup recipes online involve a blender
and i absolutely love the idea of them but i cannot justify a blender rn
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The funny thing is, when i say, i want to make a new type of mouse thats the most ergonomic mouse in the world and i think it could work this way, i do this because rsi is a bitch, people focus on the part where I want to combat my own rsi and suggest the same old alternatives and they just don't stop also even after I say: yeah I know but I just want to make this thing I just think its cool. Isn't that strange. But maybe it's not strange. Maybe the concept of trying to make something is extremely far removed from most people
#yeah. maybe its not that they dont take me seriously but rather that they cant fathom wanting to make something new for themselves#my stuff#personal#anyway i broke open the pen mouse and the buttons are soooo tiny and the processor is sooooo tiny the idea is completely feasible#unfortunately i just dont want to learn electronic circuits i just dont wanna#i could ask my dad or i could ask a random electrical engineering student i guess....#i really dont know how im gonna do that second thing
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So You Need To Buy A Computer But You Don't Know What Specs Are Good These Days
Hi.
This is literally my job.
Lots of people are buying computers for school right now or are replacing computers as their five-year-old college laptop craps out so here's the standard specs you should be looking for in a (windows) computer purchase in August 2023.
PROCESSOR
Intel i5 (no older than 10th Gen)
Ryzen 7
You can get away with a Ryzen 5 but an intel i3 should be an absolute last resort. You want at least an intel i5 or a Ryzen 7 processor. The current generation of intel processors is 13, but anything 10 or newer is perfectly fine. DO NOT get a higher performance line with an older generation; a 13th gen i5 is better than an 8th gen i7. (Unfortunately I don't know enough about ryzens to tell you which generation is the earliest you should get, but staying within 3 generations is a good rule of thumb)
RAM
8GB absolute minimum
If you don't have at least 8GB RAM on a modern computer it's going to be very, very slow. Ideally you want a computer with at least 16GB, and it's a good idea to get a computer that will let you add or swap RAM down the line (nearly all desktops will let you do this, for laptops you need to check the specs for Memory and see how many slots there are and how many slots are available; laptops with soldered RAM cannot have the memory upgraded - this is common in very slim laptops)
STORAGE
256GB SSD
Computers mostly come with SSDs these days; SSDs are faster than HDDs but typically have lower storage for the same price. That being said: SSDs are coming down in price and if you're installing your own drive you can easily upgrade the size for a low cost. Unfortunately that doesn't do anything for you for the initial purchase.
A lot of cheaper laptops will have a 128GB SSD and, because a lot of stuff is stored in the cloud these days, that can be functional. I still recommend getting a bit more storage than that because it's nice if you can store your music and documents and photos on your device instead of on the cloud. You want to be able to access your files even if you don't have internet access.
But don't get a computer with a big HDD instead of getting a computer with a small SSD. The difference in speed is noticeable.
SCREEN (laptop specific)
Personally I find that touchscreens have a negative impact on battery life and are easier to fuck up than standard screens. They are also harder to replace if they get broken. I do not recommend getting a touch screen unless you absolutely have to.
A lot of college students especially tend to look for the biggest laptop screen possible; don't do that. It's a pain in the ass to carry a 17" laptop around campus and with the way that everything is so thin these days it's easier to damage a 17" screen than a 14" screen.
On the other end of that: laptops with 13" screens tend to be very slim devices that are glued shut and impossible to work on or upgrade.
Your best bet (for both functionality and price) is either a 14" or a 15.6" screen. If you absolutely positively need to have a 10-key keyboard on your laptop, get the 15.6". If you need something portable more than you need 10-key, get a 14"
FORM FACTOR (desktop specific)
If you purchase an all-in-one desktop computer I will begin manifesting in your house physically. All-in-ones take away every advantage desktops have in terms of upgradeability and maintenance; they are expensive and difficult to repair and usually not worth the cost of disassembling to upgrade.
There are about four standard sizes of desktop PC: All-in-One (the size of a monitor with no other footprint), Tower (Big! probably at least two feet long in two directions), Small Form Factor Tower (Very moderate - about the size of a large shoebox), and Mini/Micro/Tiny (Small! about the size of a small hardcover book).
If you are concerned about space you are much better off getting a MicroPC and a bracket to put it on your monitor than you are getting an all-in-one. This will be about a million percent easier to work on than an all-in-one and this way if your monitor dies your computer is still functional.
Small form factor towers and towers are the easiest to work on and upgrade; if you need a burly graphics card you need to get a full size tower, but for everything else a small form factor tower will be fine. Most of our business sales are SFF towers and MicroPCs, the only time we get something larger is if we have to put a $700 graphics card in it. SFF towers will accept small graphics cards and can handle upgrades to the power supply; MicroPCs can only have the RAM and SSD upgraded and don't have room for any other components or their own internal power supply.
WARRANTY
Most desktops come with either a 1 or 3 year warranty; either of these is fine and if you want to upgrade a 1 year to a 3 year that is also fine. I've generally found that if something is going to do a warranty failure on desktop it's going to do it the first year, so you don't get a hell of a lot of added mileage out of an extended warranty but it doesn't hurt and sometimes pays off to do a 3-year.
Laptops are a different story. Laptops mostly come with a 1-year warranty and what I recommend everyone does for every laptop that will allow it is to upgrade that to the longest warranty you can get with added drop/damage protection. The most common question our customers have about laptops is if we can replace a screen and the answer is usually "yes, but it's going to be expensive." If you're purchasing a low-end laptop, the parts and labor for replacing a screen can easily cost more than half the price of a new laptop. HOWEVER, the way that most screens get broken is by getting dropped. So if you have a warranty with drop protection, you just send that sucker back to the factory and they fix it for you.
So, if it is at all possible, check if the manufacturer of a laptop you're looking at has a warranty option with drop protection. Then, within 30 days (though ideally on the first day you get it) of owning your laptop, go to the manufacturer site, register your serial number, and upgrade the warranty. If you can't afford a 3-year upgrade at once set a reminder for yourself to annually renew. But get that drop protection, especially if you are a college student or if you've got kids.
And never, ever put pens or pencils on your laptop keyboard. I've seen people ruin thousand dollar, brand-new laptops that they can't afford to fix because they closed the screen on a ten cent pencil. Keep liquids away from them too.
LIFESPAN
There's a reasonable chance that any computer you buy today will still be able to turn on and run a program or two in ten years. That does not mean that it is "functional."
At my office we estimate that the functional lifespan of desktops is 5-7 years and the functional lifespan of laptops is 3-5 years. Laptops get more wear and tear than desktops and desktops are easier to upgrade to keep them running. At 5 years for desktops and 3 years for laptops you should look at upgrading the RAM in the device and possibly consider replacing the SSD with a new (possibly larger) model, because SSDs and HDDs don't last forever.
COST
This means that you should think of your computers as an annual investment rather than as a one-time purchase. It is more worthwhile to pay $700 for a laptop that will work well for five years than it is to pay $300 for a laptop that will be outdated and slow in one year (which is what will happen if you get an 8th gen i3 with 8GB RAM). If you are going to get a $300 laptop try to get specs as close as possible to the minimums I've laid out here.
If you have to compromise on these specs, the one that is least fixable is the processor. If you get a laptop with an i3 processor you aren't going to be able to upgrade it even if you can add more RAM or a bigger SSD. If you have to get lower specs in order to afford the device put your money into the processor and make sure that the computer has available slots for upgrade and that neither the RAM nor the SSD is soldered to the motherboard. (one easy way to check this is to search "[computer model] RAM upgrade" on youtube and see if anyone has made a video showing what the inside of the laptop looks like and how much effort it takes to replace parts)
Computers are expensive right now. This is frustrating, because historically consumer computer prices have been on a downward trend but since 2020 that trend has been all over the place. Desktop computers are quite expensive at the moment (August 2023) and decent laptops are extremely variably priced.
If you are looking for a decent, upgradeable laptop that will last you a few years, here are a couple of options that you can purchase in August 2023 that have good prices for their specs:
14" Lenovo - $670 - 11th-gen i5, 16GB RAM, and 512GB SSD
15.6" HP - $540 - 11th-gen i5, 16GB RAM, and 256GB SSD
14" Dell - $710 - 12th-gen i5, 16GB RAM, and 256GB SSD
If you are looking for a decent, affordable desktop that will last you a few years, here are a couple of options that you can purchase in August 2023 that have good prices for their specs:
SFF HP - $620 - 10th-gen i5, 16GB RAM, 1TB SSD
SFF Lenovo - $560 - Ryzen 7 5000 series, 16GB RAM, 512GB SSD
Dell Tower - $800 - 10th-gen i7, 16GB RAM, 512GB SSD
If I were going to buy any of these I'd probably get the HP laptop or the Dell Tower. The HP Laptop is actually a really good price for what it is.
Anyway happy computering.
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A theory on why Jazz has a visor: Maybe he has heterochromia (eyes are both different colors) which has negative associations for some framing reason.
YOU🫵 ARE COOKING

Jazz was created with a blue and yellow optic, which for cybertronians is not only a “defect” that is looked down upon, it also heavily affects his vision

Jazz’s different-colored optics messed with his vision more than anyone ever guessed. His processor was constantly working overtime to make sense of the uneven input, scrambling to align depth, light, and motion in real time. Focusing on anything for too long gave him processor-aches bad enough to knock out a lesser mech. But Jazz had been built this way, so he figured this was just how seeing worked. He adapted, like he always did, with a whole lot of trial and error.
Then came Prowl. Prowl, who noticed everything, even the tiny ways Jazz tilted his helm to make sense of a view or hesitated a fraction too long when reacting, which could mean life or death for a miner. After constant worrying, Prowl finally manages to drag his aft to a proper medic, Ratchet, who didn’t even need a full scan before deadpanning, “Kid, you can’t see scrap” After some tests, Ratchet fitted him with a custom visor to help balance and sync the visual input.
The moment it powered on, Jazz nearly shorted, everything was sharp, solid, clear. And the first thing he actually saw in his whole life? Prowl’s face.
(Based on this post)
#Prowl: HOW have you lived this long without seeing??#Jazz: I followed the sounds? I thought it was normal#Prowl crashes after that#transformers#transformers one#class jezter art#tfo#tf jazz#tf prowl#jazzprowl#maccadams
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And I shan’t be having the expensive stuff I was going to order. I’m ordering the whore pasta and fucking off to the bottle-o to take a nice tempranillo or malbec back to my resort unit and have a long chat with mum. Got earplugs for the (my home town) derros that checked in yesterday too so I can attempt sleeping again.
#this is why I don’t go on holiday#and why I need to learn to drive#so I can stay in a secret tiny home in the woods alone and unbothered#take my mini food processor along for pasta sauces#and the dog
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I stand by the belief that Drift/Deadlock and Hot Rod would be friends in any universe. Much to the terror of everyone else.
———————————————————————
Deadlock was loosing his mind.
Deadlocks face plates were starting to hurt from the strain of manually stopping himself from reflexively smiling. And why did he have an overwhelming compulsion to smile?
Because: This. Tiny. Minuscule. Absolute Fragging SPECK of a human was somehow radiating more emotion out of his EM field than any other mech that Deadlock has ever met in his life.
And what was that emotion?
"THIS IS THE COOLEST SHIT IVE EVER SEEN IN MY FUCKING LIFE!"
Joy. Pure. Unfiltered. Unrestrained. And completely unreasonable levels of joy.
"RATCHET. RATCHET. HE'S SO COOL."
The mini nuclear reactor was currently shaking the medic by the shoulders, practically vibrating with unspent energy. Seconds ago, Hot Rod had seemingly slagging materialized next to him in an explosion of emotion that damn near knocked Deadlock on his aft. He was currently tempted to swat the little fragger halfway across the hangar to escape the onslaught of unexpected emotions except-
Ratchet had personally brought him in. Even now, the medics field remained calm and collected in the face of what to Deadlock felt like a fragging Sun. He kinda envied humans field numbness right now because it was definitely starting to screw with his processor.
Case in point, Deadlock had to take a click to refocus on what the squishes were talking about.
"No fucking way. Really?!"
“Yes, he really did take down those three quints near the wind farm by himself. Ate one of 'em too.”
"YOU EAT THEM?!?"
Deadlock was expecting disgust, but instead all he could feel was overwhelming awe. His resolve to remain aloof and detached was quickly beginning to crumble before the blast furnace of Hot Rods personality.
A manual override finally failed and Deadlock broke into a wide grin. At least he kept his fangs on prominent display. Equal parts smile and threat.
"Drink, actually."
Deadlock made a conscious effort to take on a more relaxed posture, one that would convey predatory pride and confidence.
"Dude. Dude. Dude."
Hot Rod held his hands to his face, leg rapidly bouncing up and down.
"YOU'RE A FREAKING ROBOT VAMPIRE FROM OUTER SPACE?!"
Before Deadlock could ask what a vampire was, Hot Rod had begun jogging away while screaming incoherently.
"What. What is happening?" Deadlock leaned towards his human, listening to Hot Rod get fainter as he rounded the corner of the hangar.
"About what I expected.” Ratchet grumbled, setting his hands on his hips.
“Roddy is intense as they come but he’s a damn good pilot and an even better friend."
Ratchet pointed a finger at Deadlock.
"Don't tell him I said that."
Hot Rod had become almost inaudible by now but was slowly gaining volume again.
"Right now kid, it's just been you and I. And trust me I enjoy the arrangement. But we can't fight every battle by ourselves. Sometimes you just need help. Sometimes,"
The screaming was quickly gaining decibels.
“You just need a friend.”
A friend.
Huh.
The scarred, defensive, self preserving part of Deadlock protested the thought of being pried open any further. Ratchet had started the process. But, c'mon. It's Ratchet. He scolded his inner self. Ratchet always left things stronger then before. So, maybe. Just a little bit. Deadlock could at least see what was so great about this squishy human.
The screaming returned to its initial volume as Hot Rod rounded the corner and mech. They were pretty sure humans normally breathed more often than that?
Hot Rod came to a stop before the two of them.
Finally gasping in fresh air. His field was absolutely roiling, pretty much all positive emotions but the screaming lap around the building had clearly vented a lot of energy.
"Can you turn into a bat?!"
Deadlock reset his optics, an idea spreading across his processor as he finally let his Em field reciprocate with giddiness and mischief.
Who cares if it's sparkling behavior? It’s fun. He told the Deadlock part of himself.
"Nope. But do you want to know what I can turn into?"
Hot Rod nodded so fast Ratchet looked concerned.
Che-che-chu-klunk.
Hot Rod started screaming again.
This time when when his EM field hit Deadlock he took it all in and reflected it right back. He revved his engine so loudly it shook the windows. Hot Rod was running and jumping in a tight circle around the two of them, radiating Joy Joy Joy Joy. Deadlock swore his field was even effecting Ratchet at this point from the way happy seemed to bounce between the three of them in various shades.
"Can we go for a ride?!"
Hot Rod had stopped by Deadlocks passenger side door. Rapidly looking between Ratchet and Deadlock, clearly uncertain who's permission to ask for.
"Well Doc, do you trust us not to get into trouble?" He wriggled his tires.
"You two? Staying out of trouble? Hell no."
Ratchet rubbed his chin the way he always did when he was trying to stop himself from smiling.
"But as long as you both come back in one piece and before dark... Well I don't see the harm."
Hot Rod gave his loudest "WOOP!" Yet. A feat in it of itself. A scrambled into Deadlocks cabin, forgoing the door entirely to throw himself bodily through the window.
They tore away from Ratchets hangar with a chorus of thanks and a spray of gravel.
———————
It was well after dark by the time the duo rolled into Ratchets hangar. Hot Rod stumbled out into a semi controlled summersault that left him spread eagle on the floor, laughing and panting. While Deadlock smoothly transformed and promptly rolled flat on his back in a similar state of delirium.
They had so much fun. He had so much fun.
When was the last time he'd ever felt like that?
When had he ever felt like that?
Ratchet was upside down frowning at him. No, wait. Smiling.
Happy. Fondness. Proud.
Love.
Deadlock cleared his vents and put a hand over his spark before his chest plates could do something very stupid.
Ratchet turned to the hot mess on the floor.
"I got the couch set up for you. Figured you're gonna stay the night."
Hot Rod stuck his arms straight up, palms open.
"Woo, sleepover!"
His field had finally simmered down to something like coals. A bone deep exhaustion that made Deadlock feel heavy by proxy.
They both gracelessly shuffled onto their respective resting arrangements, Ratchet taking the recliner after dimming all the lights.
Soon enough, all three were in recharge or asleep.
———————
Deadlock started out of recharge with tightly trained silence.
Something was wrong.
Threatened. Stressed. Afraid.
Deadlock seemed dead to the world still. But internally, his systems quickly synced to kill. A skill he had honed over many millennia of unsafe homes and attempted assassinations.
What surprised him was how he already mentally mapped out how to maneuver the humans into the safest location in a fight. Deadlock finally onlined his optics, casting the hangar in an amber glow. His processor clicked and Deadlock realized what was triggering his fight response.
Threatened. Stressed. Afraid.
Hot Rod.
Limbs twisted in fabric, face buried in the crook of the couch. Posture contorted. Breathing uneven. Field pulled in so tight it felt suffocating.
Deadlock loosely knew what a nightmare was.
Ratchet got them sometimes, though he wouldn't admit it until Deadlock made it clear the lack of context was freaking him out a little.
The way Ratchet explained it was that it was essentially a way for the brain to process excess information. Basically the same as defrag but with some weird human side effects because of course there were weird human side effects.
Like whatever was currently happening to Hot Rod.
From previous experience, nudging Ratchet awake usually resulted in a snort or other cut of vocalization. But if there was anything Deadlock had learned it was that Hot Rod did not do anything quietly.
Ratchet was still sleeping on his recliner, but there was a subtle shifting and a pinch to his face. Not a nightmare, Deadlock had learned the pattern, but something was bothering the medic and it threatened to wake him from his much needed rest.
Help.
The wave of desperate emotion spilled out like an overfilled cup.
Right, Hod Rods EM field was freakishly strong. It was restrained for now but Deadlock dreaded what it’d feel like if the dam broke.
He watched Ratchet stir again and. . . Wait.
Could humans pick up on EM fields?
Can’t a deaf mech still feel the vibrations of a song? Couldn’t a blind one still feel the warmth of the sun?
What if?
Deadlock moved as silently as death. Cupping a servo over the pilot. He stopped restricting his field and focused.
Calm.
Hot Rod made another almost vocalization. Like he was trying to yell without enough air.
Calm. Deadlock tried again. Comforting anyone was so, so far from his normal area of expertise. Did he even know what calm was supposed to feel like? What safe was supposed to be? He wracked his memories as Deadlock and abandoned that immediately.
Calm. Safe. Ratchet.
Okay. Deadlock didn’t know how to comfort someone, but Ratchet did. He focused his field again, this time on trying to mimic what he always felt from Ratchet as closely as possible.
Care. Fondness.
Deadlock vented slowly. It felt hollow coming from him. The new field was there but it was weak. Unsupported. Deadlock worried his lip with a fang. Hot Rod simmered.
He vented slowly. Deadlock opened the box at the back of his mind named Drift. He knew what he needed. Everything else could stay but he needed this one feeling. Just one.
The stars were out over Dead End. A brown out had swept the area, leaving everything in the dark. Drift didn’t know the sky could look like that.
The others were gathered around in silent awe. Nobody dared to break the spell. Tomorrow, everything would suck again. Scraping money for the next meal, the next hit, the next chance to live just a little longer.
But for a few fleeting moments, Drift was okay. They were all okay. Because the circles of light around Cybertron said so.
Peace.
Drift let the feeling fill his field. Calm and fondness meant something again.
He thought of his time with Ratchet and Hot Rod. Finding something new in himself.
Protect.
It was like smoke clearing all at once. Hot Rod exhaled deeply in his sleep, field going soft and gentle.
He kept it up, at some point his engine had started purring without him knowing. A pleasant white noise within the hangar. They were okay. Everyone he cared about was okay. He felt peace. Just for now. Just for them.
“Didn’t know you could do that.”
Ratchets voice was thick with sleep. One eye barely cracked to look at him.
“Me too.”
—————————
Part 1
This is long and it’s getting late. Deadlock has an emotional breakthrough and Hot Rod dreams about I dunno, pancakes or something.
-SSTP
Infinitely entertained by the mental image of Ratchet trying to pick someone who he can trust but who will also get along with Kid. And then looking at Hot Rod and being like Yep. That one.
ALSO. Hot Rod having an EM field equivalent of a nuclear fucking reactor is just so👌👌👌 YES HE WOULD. ABSOLUTELY YES HAHAHKFNGM
I never get tired of reading about Roddy and Lock losing their last brain cells when they are together. Anon. Anon look at me. I LOVE YOU ANON. I WILL CHERISH THIS PIECE FOREVER IT BROUGHT ME THE UNMEASURABLE AMOUNT OF JOY THANK YOU FOR SHARING IT

#maccadam#transformers#tf mecha universe#ratchlock#Hot rod#roddy#mecha writing#mecha rl writing#mecha dr art#mecha dr writing
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hey whenever you can, can you make some yandere d-16

❥༄ؘ I'll do you one better Anon!! How about Yandere D-16 vs Megatron
𝄞 Somebody That I Used To Know (Slowed)
✿˗ˏˋ ✴︎D-16✴︎ ˎˊ˗✿
.☘︎ ݁˖D-16 can't remember when exactly he first noticed the erratic pulsing of his spark straining against his metallic frame when you walked into the room. Just that, after all these cycles, it had remained constant, enrapt. Pulling him to you.
.☘︎ ݁˖D-16 has a tendency to pick at things he likes, things he finds bizarrely blissfulas. He wishes he could leave them alone, leave the questions locked under his tongue and the paint free of servo marks. But he can't, indifference only gets you so far, and while he tries to follow protocol. He can't always let things go. He can't let you go.
.☘︎ ݁˖He watches as you chip away at sedimentary rock, coated in soot as you trek for the liquid lifeline. He can't help but think you look like a princess from those old spark-tales. Circuitella. Dainty and disheveled. He wonders if he should offer to carry your jackhammer on the way back to the barracks. He wonders if his voice box can even form words in your presence. He settles for trailing behind you. Optics darting between the stone walls and the back of your helm. Orian laughs and laughs and laughs. D-16 can't help but see the humor in it all. Irony too early to land.
.☘︎ ݁˖He didn't mean to drag you to the surface. It just so happens that on that exact day, there was a forgotten crate. And in that exact moment, you'd decided to personally deliver it to the surface train. It just so happens he grabs your servo, pulling into the shadow of the crates. Tucked away beneath him. Heading for doom or glory or a grotesque third.
.☘︎ ݁˖D-16 is obsessive, longing for his darling from afar. Desperate for a sliver of your attention, desperate for the shadow of your presence. He can't help but watch you, optics trailing over your gorgeous features. He can't help but dream of the taste of your lips and sturdy touch as he chips away at a vein.
.☘︎ ݁˖He secretly collects little pieces of your essence. Keeping them locked in his chest chamber right above his spark. Chipped paint, a piece of metal from your plating, tiny parts of an old drill you once used. He needs you in ways he can't understand, ways that claw at his processor and spark like the wild beasts Megatrouns used to fight. Needs to hear your voice as you complain about a stiff joint or your breathy giggle as you laugh at him and Orian arguing again.
.☘︎ ݁˖He wishes he could collect stickers of you. Stick them across his frame and watch the iridescent glow under Cybertron's sun. Wishes he could decorate his measly possessions with your radiant smile and sparkling optics.
.☘︎ ݁˖Is it weird that I LOVE the thought of D-16 collecting stickers? Mostly of Megatrous but also of the other primes, famous racers, sentinel prime, etc.
.☘︎ ݁˖The thought of Sentinel Prime having touched you, having stolen a part of you (let alone a part of him) leaves him teetering on lava rage, leaving his spark breaking in ways he didn't know it could.
.☘︎ ݁˖D-16 is still a child, young and new by Cybertronian standards. But age isn't gauged by online cycles now is it? It's measured in accomplishments and opalescent dreams. So maybe the little Sparkling voice screaming in the back of his helm isn't too far off. Crying that by stealing his T-cog, your T-cog. Sentinel screwed up something in your circuitry. Maybe you were always sparkbound. Maybe you were the incarnation of Solus Prime and he, Megatronus. Maybe you where always destined to be together.
.☘︎ ݁˖These thoughts burn his processor during the treacherous trek back home, back to Iacon. Can you even call he even call that cage a home? D-16 hovers closer to you. Growing bolder, even daring to leave his servo on your shoulder pad. Daring to hold your servo and drag you out of danger.
.☘︎ ݁˖"Thanks, D" you chirp cheerfully and he thinks his spark might just erupt. "Yeah it's nothing" he mutters jogging after Orian leaving you behind with a giggling and concerned Elita-one.
.☘︎ ݁˖After "retrieving" Megatronus's T-cog from Sentinel he swears on Primus himself that he shall fuse you with Solus Prime's T-cog solidifying your love. Bounding you to him through every incarnation.
.☘︎ ݁˖D-16 is tragic in every way. His fall makes Cybertron shake, his new scarlet optics send a shiver through the universe. Obsession and subjugation. Anger and Hate. D-16 burns away, you feel it when you kiss him over Sentinel's corpse. The monster in his place bites your lips trying to devour every inch of your. Conquer, Conquer, Conquer
.☘︎ ݁˖Even if Orion Pax/Optimus Prime tries to protect you. Keep you in Iacon safe from the bot he once called brother. There is no way he can stop the newly evolved warlord from hunting you down. D-16 had always been loyal to his obsessions, tearing through everything to feel them under his servos. Although back then -when they'd been happy under a blanket of lies- D-16's obsessions had simply been holographic stickers of tragic heroes. Now it's bloodstained domination. Conformation to a macraber freedom. He's no longer a little minor bot tolling away, he's Megatron now. Hungry monstrous thing raging wars until he has both his darling and Cybertron in his grasp once more. D-16 had always told Orion that he thought you nothing less than a princess. And maybe it has always been true, after all, princesses are a tragedy too.
.☘︎ ݁˖Optimus can't help but shed a tear at the thought as he watches D-16 Megatron roll away...
⋆༺𓆩𓆩Megatron𓆪𓆪༻⋆
✮ Upon your recapture, Megatron isn't too gentle. He's rough and angry. He's betrayed -again- it pricks at his spark like daggers. The first thing Megatron does is force Solus Prime's T-cog into your chassis. He promised you he'd bound you to him, didn't he? Promised you'd be together in every incarnation. And unlike every golden leader before him, Megatron intends to keep every one of his promises.
✮ He loves the sight of you writhing in pain beneath him. Runs his clawed servos over the the raw wires fusing and the circuits crunching into each other. The look of utter pain in your optics has his spark racing like the first time he saw you in the mines. He can't help but kiss you deeply, greedily swallowing your essence.
✮ You can taste his anger on your tongue. You roll the pulp of rage around your mouth swallowing the sadness, the desperation. Letting the taste burn the roof of your mouth. He calls you traitor and darling between each breath. And you can't tell if he wants to kiss your spark or decollate your helm and mount it on the wall of his new ship.
✮ Megatron suffers in shades and flavors that haven't been invented yet, you feel them swatch against your lips in every single one of his raging kisses. He isn't above leaving marks and dents across your armor. He likes you better this way broken and beautiful. Tragedy in every way
✮ He used to hate seeing you scared and defenseless. Now such a precious sight leaves him intoxicated, spark buzzing with overt excitment. He likes this power, feeling you tremble each time he raises his servo. Your life is laced between his digits, he loves tugging it harshly showing you how he controls you in every way imaginable. He likes being the monster that princesses fear. "Circuitella" he whispers under his breath, he knows you don't get the joke.
✮ Megatron likes to kill through you. Intwined digits holding a blaser, his claws on your digits pushing until the trigger releases and the bullets impale the target. He trails open-mouthed kisses across your back afterward. Sharp teeth sinking into the metal of your neck. He pulls you closer locked between his arms. When did he get so big? You remember when he'd been so utterly small. Little minor bot, where is he? Megatron never notices your melancholy optics or the whirl of your processor as it tries to distance itself from the physical world. All he cares about is your body wrapped within his. About the sweet taste of your metal and paint on his tongue.
✮ Megatron's love is lave upon open wounds, painful in every way. Where D-16's love had once been saccharine energon goodies and shy iridescent kisses. But D-16 is dead, he died with Orion all those centuries ago. Only Megatron remains. Lord Megatron, the one who keeps you caged, overpowers you with rough kisses and says "I love you" while pointing a blaser to your spark.
✮ I guess it's worth mentioning that D-16 would never harm his darling in any way but would absolutely avenge her if someone so much as left a scratch on her. Megtran punishes his darling for amusement and also because he loves her submission and fear. But I guess a little D-16 still lives inside him cause he will rip apart anyone who so much as touches his darling.
✮ Sometimes, when the lights are low and darkness begins to play it's ploys. You swear you see D-16 looking at you. Easy smile and bright sunny eyes. Body still tiny, with no pain engraved upon it. But illusions are always so quick to shatter, their precious shards melting under reality's brutal wight. D-16 withers away and in his place Lord Megatron stands. Piercing Claws and teeth gleaming under the dim light. He's gentle when he touches you laying something on your armour. Thin smile as he admires you, ethereal little you before leaving. You always check to see what he's left. It's always an iridescent sticker from his old collection...
#transformers one#transformers#megatron#megatron x reader#yandere megatron#d-16#d-16 x reader#megatron x you#yandere#yandere x reader#yancore#yandere x you#yandere aesthetic#yandere male x reader#yandere male x you#cybercore#yandere imagines#transformers imagine#transformers headcanons#transformers one spoilers#tf one#tf#d 16#d 16 tf#tf1#cybertronian reader#yandere x darling#robotcore#robot girl#robot
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it probably didn't happen, but imagine the shrinking somehow reached the decepticons. I need the humans to react to the tiny cons because they of all the transformers act like they're scary and tough, but need a good hug.


You guys keep me amused 😂 Let’s just go with suspension of disbelief and say somehow Wheeljack also FUBARed the Cons
I have requests for TFA Shockwave, Sunstorm, Rung, TFA Ratchet, Hound, and Cyberverse Soundwave. I’m actually busy at work this week, though, researching and compiling data, so updates may be wonky unless I start typing up the next day’s posts the previous night

Mass Displacement Mayhem Scenarios Pt 3
Megatron
• Staggering and off balance as he’s forced to mass displace without warning and then realizes he went past his limits somehow. That he’s only about knee high on you. The shock of it freezing him in place, so he flinches when you grab him and drag him into you. And it’s wholly undignified the way you’re going on about his “widdle” cannon. Why are you talking like that? He’s wracking his processor trying to figure out how this happened, because he’s stuck and can’t mass shift back. Left tiny and vulnerable, though it’s hard to focus on defense when you’re cupping his face in your warm palms, apparently delighted. Venting because he’s much too old for this, he keeps an optic and his cannon aimed at the door as you pull him into your lap to fuss over him. Secretly enjoying the feel of you hugging him as undignified as it is, but please stop talking to him like he’s a sparkling.
Thundercracker
• Has absolutely no idea what just happened, but before he can even try to figure it out, you attack. Had known you were still unhappy about being stolen, but didn’t expect you to lash out- oh, never mind. You just want to pick him up. Little wings flicking fitfully when you press a kiss to his helm and play with his wings with gentle fingers. All while cooing at him. Knows he should be mortified, but he’s enjoying the attention. Fuss over him all you want.
Starscream
• Flies to perch out of reach the instant you made that awful noise and tried to grab him. Glowering as you try to coax him to you. Why are you crooning at him like that? It’s undignified and he’s more worried about how vulnerable you both are right now. No, he’s not coming down. He is absolutely not cute. Trying his best to ignore you and keep an optic on the door ready to attack, because he’s completely stressed out, wings flared and paranoia out of control.
Constructicons
• Scattered when you ran toward them. They have no idea what happened, but to avoid being caught, they have to transform to speed away and you’re laughing hysterically as you chase after them. Bonecrusher gives up first and transforms back. Unresisting as you grab him and sit, grinning over how cute he is. Eventually they all wander over once they realize you’re not attacking. Patiently letting you fuss over all of them, grumbling but secretly eating up the attention. Scavenger just outright climbing into your lap for a hug.
Soundwave
• Hoisting Soundwave up into your arms to save him from his overly excited cassettes, you’re as giddy as they are. Because somehow Soundwave mass displaced smaller than you’ve ever seen. And because you’re holding him, you’re now also being mobbed by cassettes wanting to hold tiny Soundwave. Feeling guilty about it as you cave to their pleas and sit crosslegged with him in your lap, hearing his tired venting as you and his cassettes fuss over how cute he is. Tipping his head back to stare at you. “Traitor,” he grumbles, that serious voice coming from such a tiny frame shattering your own composure as you hug him laughing.
Shockwave
• Antenna back as he gets carried around like a helpless sparkling. Asks you to put him down and you ignore him, and since he’s unwilling to hurt you to get free, he’s just tolerating it. Please stop kissing him on the head, you’re making his processor chaotic. Cute? Him? Illogical. Venting tiredly at you the whole time, but a part of him almost enjoying the attention and how gentle your hands are. That you’re not intimidated by him at this size.
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#transformers x reader#shockwave x reader#starscream x reader#thundercracker x reader#megatron x reader#constructicons x reader#soundwave x reader#soundwave#megatron#starscream#thundercracker#shockwave
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✧˖° 𝐢𝐟 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮
inspired by 'if not for you' by george harrison
[tfp] obsessed!optimus prime x human!reader
summary: after winning the war, optimus found his safe haven. with you.
cw: fluff, pinch of angst, obsessive thoughts, i may have romanticized his obsession a bit... self-indulgence, canon divergence - optimus gets his happy ending :))
word count: 1200
this fic can be treated as the yang to my previous piece about his dream and as the good ending to the whole obsessed!optimus arc
Once, a fire burned within his body. It consumed every conduit, reached every metallic tissue. The blaze wrought devastation, destroying and leaving behind necrosis until it consumed him entirely, mercilessly incinerating the remnants of optimism, the hope that he might live to see a better tomorrow.
Optimus burned out; the flame hollowed him from within and left behind only a shell. Deep within his spark, however, an ember still flickered — a reminder that he could not surrender, that he must endure to the end and serve his own, for that was the role he had chosen those ages ago. He could not capitulate. He would not.
And then, you appeared. A tiny spark that reignited the fire.
This one was fiercer and more painful, but within it lay the beauty of caring for someone, loving their flaws and imperfections, lending strength when it was most needed. You gave him enough of it to end the conflict once and for all. Optimus had long lost hope for a better tomorrow for himself. But for yours, he was willing to do absolutely anything. To ensure your well-being, reshape the future so you would no longer have to live in fear for your home. He did not factor himself into it; knew the sacrifice required to bring an end to a war that had escalated to an interplanetary scale. He could only dream, nourishing his imagination with visions he would never behold.
At least, that was what he once believed.
The wind gently brushes against his armor, and the spring sun envelops him with warmth. Far from civilization, no sounds of haste or petty conflicts reach him. It is only him and your garden, the flora that continously surprises him with something new. Colors, shapes of flowers, bloom schedules. Simple organisms, mundane and primitive, yet he saw beauty in them. Their simplicity fascinated him, as it was the complete opposite of Cybertron and its inhabitants.
But what captivated him most was their will to live, their resilience, the extent of suffering they could endure before yielding, before giving up. He drew inspiration from them, saw himself in them, for he, too, wished to live.
Now, yes. For you.
He knows you will return soon; your weekly schedule is deeply etched into his processor. But until then, he does not know what to do with himself. He always spends his time waiting for you, for the moment your vehicle rolls into the garage, for it is only then that he begins to truly live. In your company, surrounded by conversation, your kindness, and an affection impossible to replicate.
Everything he does in your absence is merely to kill time, to hasten your return, to occupy his processor and stave off madness without you. Sometimes, he manages, especially when a former teammate visits. But there are days when all he can do is meditate beneath the tree closest to the driveway, waiting for you. Thinking about what you will do together when you return, what news from work you will share with him, and how he might bring you joy today.
Without you, he is lost. The self-sufficiency built over so many years suddenly crumbles, revealing an uncertain, astray being entirely dependent on his conjunx.
Today is no exception to the routine. No one has visited. Optimus remains alone with his thoughts, which, for several years now, have been recalibrated to revolve solely around you. Once, they fed the fire he had to vigilantly tend, for he easily lost control over it, and it burned him alive. Now, it envelops him in a pleasant warmth, more soothing than the sun’s radiance. More comforting and tender. It brings him solace and peace, though it still fuels an unhealthy devotion. No longer destructive, but still imbued with a fiery passion, more powerful than Primus himself.
Sometimes, he misses Cybertron. Guilt over abandoning the search for a way home gnaws at him when he is not entirely focused on you. He knows the others still strive to find a solution. Occasionally, they invite him on missions, living fossils of his former life, but Optimus ceased aiding them for his own interest long ago. He does not wish to return, could not bear to leave you, to forsake the life you have painstakingly woven together. He might as well perish if it meant never seeing you again.
A sound pulls him back to reality, the scratch of tires on a gravel road. You are still distant; he will see you in precisely four minutes and twenty-six seconds, but a subtle smile already creeps onto his faceplate. This is the exact moment he has awaited half the day, yet even now, his composure cracks, revealing his excitement. He wishes to greet you. Now. Immediately.
He mass-shifts, preparing for your return. Would prefer to drive you himself, but you insisted on not taking advantage of him, a decision he never fully understood. Had he not made it abundantly clear that he would do anything for you? That he was at your every beck and call, ready to please and serve? Yet, to his misfortune, it was a harmless decision, one you had every right to make, and he was never the confrontational type.
He watches as you park and step out of the car, holding shopping bags, which he immediately takes from you.
"Greetings, my dearest," he says.
"Hello, love!" you reply. You want to add something else, perhaps to start recounting your day, but he must interrupt you.
His servo cradles your face, fitting its contours perfectly, as if you truly were made for one another. He lowers his helm to your face and kisses you. First the edge of your lips, then your cheek and jaw, steadily trailing down to your neck.
Once, he feared touch, terrified of its power, of how quickly and completely it consumed him. How much he craved, and how little he possessed. Each time, he waited for your permission, for you to dictate what he could and could not do, lest he accidentally hurt you. Destroy the relationship that sustained his wretched life, shattering the trust you had placed in him. And though similar moments remain a near-daily occurrence in your relationship, they have migrated to other spaces, to intimate places. In other circumstances, he has relaxed the self-imposed rigor, dictating for himself when he could, when he should, and when he wanted.
“Not wasting any time today, are you?” you laugh.
"Opti, not here," you chide.
Even he is unsure of what overcame him, you closeness addictive and consuming. He usually waits until you both calmly return home to prove how much he has missed you. Today, he cannot wait. The sight of you breaks him, making him acutely aware of his yearning, which he must somehow release before it consumes him entirely.
He stops immediately, though the taste of your skin lingers on his glossa, teasing him to continue his advances. It unsettles his processor as it invigorates his frame.
"I missed you," he says, syncing his stride with yours.
“I missed you too,” you reply, smiling in a way that infects him with the same expression.
He needed this. Simplicity, a place he could call home. You. For without you, there would be no new day, no spring, and the universe would become empty. Soulless and cold.
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anon who asked about the character limit, thanks for confirming! Also as of typing I realised your ask box being tilted I Need That is prolly a reference to Ratchet XD Nice one! As for my request could I ask how TFP Ratchet, Wheeljack, Bulkhead and Bee would react to their so calling them their husband?? There was this one trend going around where a spouse would be on the phone and casually refer to their partner as husband in a conversation. I just wanna see the bots flustered and confused, that's how I like my big robots
Dear Future Husband
Ratchet:
"You leave my husband alone!"
The playful scold echoes throughout Ratchet's processor, drowning out your cheers and jeers with the kids as you chase them off from his work desk. He looks at his frozen servos, then flicks his gaze towards you, watching as you pin Miko to the ground while rubbing your fist into the top of Jack's head as he cries for some uncle of his.
Husband.
Ratchet moves a servo to the computer, typing into a search engine. The results prove he's correct, a husband is a spouse, a married partner, equivalent to a conjunx, at least in the legal sense. Probably the sentimental sense too, considering how you are.
You called him your husband.
Ratchet glances back at you again, now buried beneath revenge-seeking children. He can't see your face behind Raf, who's sat on your chest, but he can hear your laughter. He smiles.
"Come on, off with you!" Ratchet shoos the kids away from you. They tumble and laugh at the gentle brush of his servos. "Don't crush my conjunx when I still need their help."
The smile you give him is dazzling, prettier than any star he's ever seen before.
Wheeljack:
"Careful, or your guard dog will come barking."
"My husband is twice the mech you could ever wish to be!"
Wheeljack knows a thing or two about humans, not really by choice, but he knows that word you said is meant to relate to him. He cradles your tiny form to his chest, blocking blasts with his back before he's transforming around you.
Breakdown isn't an opponent he wants to deal with right now, not with your life on the line.
Luckily, the Nevada landscape provides plenty of shortcuts and hideaways for him to make use of. You mercifully keep low and keep quiet, allowing Wheeljack to think a bit better about his escape routes. As much as he hates backing down from a good fight, you're a bit more important than his pride.
How will he question you if you're dead?
"All clear now, sweetspark."
You pop up into his driver's seat, grinning wide. "Have someone record it if you fight that guy. I wanna see you hand his ass to him on a silver platter."
"And I want you to tell me what a husband is."
Your smile softens. "From what I understand from Smokes, it's the equivalent to you calling me conjunx."
Wheeljack speeds off into the desert, throwing down the driver's seat so you roll into his trunk. Ah, so you actually got curious about him calling you that? Seems you both got some explaining to do.
Bulkhead:
"My husband's the strongest by far!" You brag, causing Bulkhead to pause and look at where you're stood before the kids, Wheeljack, and Smokescreen. "And you can't compare!"
"I was in the wreckers with him!" Wheeljack protests.
"Yeah, but he's still way stronger and cooler!" Miko pipes up, firmly behind you in calling him strong and cool. Bulkhead tromps over, faceplate warm, as he waves a servo around and dismisses the group bragging session. Not that is stops Jack and Raf from arguing with Smokescreen about who's the fastest of the bots.
"What's a husband?" Bulkhead asks you, once just you and Miko remain by him. Lifted onto the catwalk, Miko giggles and tries to climb up to his shoulder. He lets her.
"Someone who really loves someone else." Miko provides, tucking into the side of his helm. "Like how you love a conjunx."
"Is that the equivalent?" You ask, grinning lopsided and wide. Bulkhead feels his spark do flips when you grab one of his digits. "I love you tons, so you're my husband, my partner bonded to me in law and in spirit."
"Oh." Bulkhead lifts his other arm, scratching at his cheek. "Uh. . . Well, I love you tons too. As many tons as I can carry."
"That's a lot!" Miko chimes.
You just laugh, and Bulkhead decides to look up what husbands do, that way he can be a proper one, all for you.
Bumblebee:
"Ah, oops, hang on." You twist around, smile sheepish as you wave at Bumblebee. "What game did you want again, hon?"
Bee's wings flick upwards, and he gives you a sweet serious of noises and a point towards one of the games he already has. It answers your question nicely, even without Raf's help to translate.
"Right!" You chirp, turning back around. "My husband would like Ultra Racing Ultimate 4, please! I can pick it up in store, yes."
The conversation drizzles away as Bee's processor overcomes with static. He vaguely draws lines between dots, what husband means and what you must mean by saying it. His spark is lurching around in his chassis like it's trying to jump out to you, its true owner.
It the second it takes you to end your call, servos wrap around your waist and drag you into a teary eyed, utterly sappy Bee. He warbles his noises at you, leaning into the palms you brush over his cheeks and the kisses you press along his helm.
"I love you too, bubs." You coo, rubbing your nose to where his would be, if he had one. "Wanna scare the guy with how fast we show up to get the game?"
Bee decides he will conjunx you by the time he finishes his game.
#transformers x reader#ratchet x reader#tfp wheeljack x reader#wheeljack x reader#tfp bulkhead x reader#tfp bumblebee x reader#tfp ratchet x reader#bumblebee x reader#bulkhead x reader#tfp ratchet#tfp wheeljack#tfp bulkhead#tfp bumblebee
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Okay, so I was looking at @keferon's mecha pilot Jazz au, and I just had to write abt it because oml the angst
Also, keep in mind I haven written anything in a very long time
Prowl was still having a hard time wrapping his processor around it. His emotions were a hurricane of confusion, rage, and betrayal. As he stared down at the organic infront of him, he couldn’t help the deep frown that formed on his faceplates.
“I guess this is a lot for you, huh Prowler?”
The organic stared back up at him with an apologetic smile. It rubbed the back of its neck awkwardly. Jazz was never awkward. At least, not that Prowl could tell. Though, it wasn’t like Jazz had an EM field to show that.
“A human, you said?”
Prowl needed to hear it again to believe it. There was no way this tiny little bag of flesh had been controlling Jazz. No way it had been Jazz.
The organic nodded. “Yeah. I know it’s probably very confusing, but imagine my confusion when I found out you were all actually sentient mechs, not pilots in mecha suits.”
This was indeed all very confusing, and yet it also made a little too much sense. It explained why Jazz had always felt so… hollow.
Prowl scoffed at the organic’s words. The implication that he was just some lifeless suit to be worn was insulting in the very least.
The organic seemed to recognize Prowl’s disdain, quickly revising his previous statement, “But that makes so much sense now! It makes sense why you’re so expressive, and how you have all these little ticks and habits. Like whenever you’re flustered your wings turn forwards a little.”
It noticed? The organic took notice of his mannerisms. That would imply that it cared enough to pay attention to those things. Well… Prowl knew Jazz cared enough to notice those things, but this organic, this human…
It made Prowl think. Think of something other than the fact that his crush friend had just opened up, and a small organic crawled out of said friend’s chassis.
“Prowl. It’s still me. It’s still Jazz. I’m just… smaller.”
The organic was giving him a hopeful smile, its voice soft as if comforting a close friend. It made Prowl’s spark melt. A part of him wanted to take the small organic and hold it in his embrace for all eternity. He just wanted Jazz back.
But the other part of him wanted to squeeze the organic till it popped. He just wanted Jazz back.
Prowl glared at the organic, and its smile faltered. This sent a pang of hurt through Prowl, but he ignored the aching in his spark.
He turned to walk away. Being there talking to it wouldn’t make things go back to how they were. Things would never go back to how they were.
“Prowl, wait!”
Prowl turns to see the organic running after him. It gets to the edge of the table and tries to stop, but it’s going too fast. It stumbles, loses balance, and falls.
But Prowl is quick, and catches the tiny being in his servos. His expression is that of fear. He felt like he was about to lose Jazz. Again.
The organic smiles. “So you do care about me.”
Prowl’s expression swiftly turns to annoyance. But… the organic did have a point, he had to admit.
Prowl began to look at the organic differently. Instead of being the parasite that crawled out of Jazz’s chassis, it was now what remained of said mech.
And maybe… just maybe… Prowl could get used to him.
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