#to me they are one of the most arospec characters ever and this is important. know this. when i interact with sloop art particularly

[frindoka]

save me arospec siffrin save me save me save me arospec siffrin. Save me

[dropoutconfessions]

It makes me incredibly angry when people say "Riz is canonically aro/ace" and act like you're a horrible person if you ship him with people. Like. Nowhere in the show is it ever stated that he's aro/ace. The conversation people reference as him being "canonically" aro/ace is just him expressing his lack of very specifically sexual attraction, and even then the response from his dad (and by extension Brennan and the show as a whole) is that it's okay, and that it's specifically unclear whether he's ace or whether it's just not something that's happened for him in specific yet. It is intentionally vague as to whether he is ace or not, and there's genuinely zero indication in the show that he's aro other than that he doesn't have a love interest which could be completely unrelated.

Right so I'd like to share my opinion on this for a brief moment. I am still fully here to give people a voice, but this is just, an issue that kinda hits close to home since I'm demiaro.

The most annoying thing in a lot of media is when representation is shoehorned in as a list of labels and buzzwords we're given. Queer people should not have to turn to the screen and say their full identity in order for them to be canonically queer. That's what subtext is for. That's what good writing does. Is not spell it out for you when it's not necessary to do so. They do not need it to be spelt out for it to be very clear that he's ace/aro.

I am going to assume ignorance here instead of assuming malicious intent. The idea that the reason he isn't ace, is because "it's not something that's happened for him in specific yet", is an extremely common thought process behind asexual erasure. I'm sure that's not what you intended, but that is something to reflect on in general.

Both Adaine and Riz have yet to have relationships or display crushes (not counting junior year since most of the evidence comes from sophomore year) . Adaine hasn't gotten an entire nightmare sequence / arc around dealing with here friends all finding partners and leaving them alone. Adaine hasn't expressed or had conversations about any lack of sexual or romantic feels to the extent Riz has. Adaine is headcanoned as ace/aro by some people. Riz is more than that. Riz is very much canonically ace/aro if you do the slightest bit of character analysis. There's accidental coding and then there's Riz Gukgak.

List of every single Riz trait that is hella ace/aro coded

A lack of sexual and romantic attraction to other people (I'm not counting the time where he said he was kinda into Sexy Rat, that whole scene was a bit, and absolutely insane)

Making up a partner/crush in order to fit in (I have 1000% done that and so have a lot of acespec and arospec people)

A fear of being left behind by his friends because of a belief that they will find partners and move on from him, largely caused by alloromantic culture's insane emphasis on how the most important relationship is a romantic one

The fact that almost every other fantasy high pc has been in a relationship or a crush (kristen had tracker and gertie, gorgug had zelda, unit, and mary ann, fabian had aelwyn, ivy, and mazey, adaine had oisin and possibly zayn depends on your interpretation, and fig has had ayda and a string of professionals in a variety of fields across seasons 1 and 2) with only riz as a single character

The fact his sophomore year arc was entirely about his lack of sexual/romantic attraction and fear of being left alone because of it

Like not even a joke, it was that and his dad, that was the whole arc

His junior year arc was also about his obsession to stay together as a friend group, which like I mentioned above, is very clearly based in his asexuality and aromanticism

I am not going to stop people from shipping characters ever. If you want to rewrite character sexualities, that's fine by me, I'm a big believer in "Don't Like, Don't Read". I am not gonna pretend like characters are not their sexuality in canon so that people feel justified in writing their stories. People who rewrite character sexuality can do so without making everyone else assuage their guilt for them. I know I'm on the "piss on the poor" reading comprehension website, but it's not hard to tell Riz is ace/aro in canon, and pretending otherwise doesn't help your case.

[destiny-in-the-universe]

Pines Headcanons [Happy Birthday, Grunkles]

I cannot believe I just now got reminded of this- holy shit. Unfortunately, I'm not an artist so have these headcanons instead about Stan and Ford

Stanley ‘Lee’ Pines

He’s bisexual. This is not up for debate (/lh). It just made sense for him 

Stanley is ambidextrous. He can write and utilize both his left and right hands. This was something he self-taught himself in after the portal accident 

On the power of ‘I said so’, Stan does have some level of book smarts but instead of math or science- it’s creative writing. He’s got the talent for it; however, he rarely - if ever - shares these stories with anyone

Stan has some form of neurodivergency. Young Stan definitely gives the impression of ADHD but also I feel he’s got dyslexia- don’t ask me why. This is canon now

He does have scars from the time he spent on the run and doing his sales. I’m not sure what they are exactly, but just know he has them 

Stan knows martial arts. Other than boxing, I feel he would’ve taught himself in other forms of fighting- like the ones done on the streets and it’s a weird mix of martial arts and free-style fighting

He can be a bit of a poet, but for the most part- Stan prefers show-and-tell as his love language. He will present his partner with gifts, and makes sure they understand he’s there for them 

He’s kind of protective over his partners, and definitely has gotten into fights in an attempt to protect their honor. It’s ill-placed sometimes but he’s not about to let some bozo mess with them

Stan always sought his father’s approval. He attempted multiple times to perfect his studying skills before the science fair accident, but apparently Old Pa Pines didn’t seem to notice and the rest, well, it was already history

He fantasized of being a pirate when he was a kid. This is where the whole thing of going on a seafaring adventure with Ford came from! Unfortunately due to canon events, this soured out but he held onto a photograph he and Ford took in front of the beach as a memoir

He’s very much not a big fan of vegetables

Stanford ‘Ford’ Pines

He’s arospec and ace!

Ford absolutely loves puzzles. Why? It just weirdly fitting for his character

He definitely has C-PTSD following the events of Weirdmaggedon

Autistic Ford? Autistic Ford. There is no way he doesn’t have it- I said what I said

Before he got involved in the strange and paranormal, one of Ford’s main interests was actually crystals and rocks! It felt weirdly fitting for his character, and here we are

Ford is more of a cat person. At one point, he rescued a cat-adjacent creature from an auction and named her ‘Nova’. Of course, it’s far from a cat but well, we’ll get to that later

He would be into LARP if it exists in the Gravity Falls canon. Like, that man is a nerd and already enjoys the show’s version of Dungeons and Dragons, there’s just no way he wouldn’t participate in LARP

He does have scars from his time in other dimensions for thirty years. He’s very secretive about them and doesn’t let anyone see- not even Stanley

Ford deals with the aftermath of a burnt-out gifted kid- like, he was the prodigal son and got all the right honors, scores, all of it but as he got older- the more he struggled, the more he felt like something was missing. As the golden child, he was brought up with the notion he would be important but then got smacked in the face when he realized none of it truly mattered

He had a lot of issues adjusting to his new life in Gravity Falls, Oregon after he was brought back from the portal. Ford’s triggered fight-or-flight response would kick in with unexpected situations- like, he’s definitely pulled a blaster/space gun

He likes hot chocolate

Ford enjoys cuddle piles, let’s be honest here. Once he gets more comfortable, he begins making nests with the rest of the Pines family

He’s protective of his family!

I’ll try and come up with new headcanons soon, but since I took too long releasing this- given I got sick unfortunately, I decided to post a smaller version 

[corvidaerook]

I'm realizing that I think my biggest pet peeve about people's interactions with asexual characters anywhere on the spectrum is when they use the word "finally."

With datv, I see people say their Rook is finally having sex with Lucanis in the late-game romance scene, and it bothers me. The phrasing just makes it sound like Lucanis' feelings don't matter, and that his comfort in his own relationship after a year of torture is less important than their Rook doing what they want.

As an ace guy, if someone phrased it like that about me, I'd dump them immediately, no warning, no take-backs, we're done. There would be no way I'd ever enter a relationship without discussing that first, and if they know my feelings and still wanna act like I'm somehow holding them back? Then okay, go find someone else. I'm not playing that game and I'm definitely not gonna be guilted into doing something I'm not interested in (or in Lucanis' case, not yet interested in.) Don't ignore my feelings about our mutual relationship.

And none of this is to say that people should feel bad for having more needs than their partner, but acting like that's their fault? Like they're being unfair for not giving up sooner? Like they owe you sex? Like somehow, a year of torture, a demon in his head, his entire life being turned upside down, him facing the whiplash of losing his Grandmother and getting her back and then losing his cousin/brother to an unbelievable betrayal isn't enough of a reason for him to not be in the mood, beyond just the fact that he shouldn't need a laundry list of excuses? In general, it just makes me think about how people seem to think consent after coercion is still consent. Like, if you're guilting someone into saying yes, it isn't a yes.

And with Lucanis, the thing that bothers me is that he'd probably feel like it's on him that his partner feels that way. He basically says that he feels insecure about not being the romantic that Illario is, and in the dessert scene he implies that he feels like he's "not enough" (with Rook immediately saying he is, so even their Rooks know better, even if they don't,) and then people are talking about him in a way that would a thousand percent confirm those feelings for him.

I know he's just pixels, it doesn't actually matter, but it's just wild to see people say they love him and then ignore a fundamental part of his character because the nonexistent relationship isn't moving fast enough. And frankly, if a Rook is one that wouldn't be able to handle waiting for Lucanis to be comfortable without guilting him about how long it took, I can't really see how that relationship would work long-term in general, sex or not. So much of Lucanis' romance is about him needing time, space, and support to adjust to things; Spite, being out of the Ossuary, Illario's betrayal, his new role as First Talon. That's the whole thing about the Mind Ossuary, is that it's Rook being able to delve through all of the shit his mind has come up with about him and say, "You're worth it" even though it takes work and time to help him be comfortable enough to make the deal with Spite. A Rook who can't be patient with him just doesn't seem compatible in the first place.

And I'm definitely getting into dangerous territory but I think this is especially true when we take into consideration a Lucanis who winds up hardened because Treviso gets Blighted. That's an example of Rook not showing up for him when he needs them the most, and he shuts down their romance immediately because of it. To me personally, from an aspec perspective, I can't imagine him not being hurt enough to close off a romance by a "finally, give me your body already" vibe.

This all sounds like me being sensitive, and it kind of is, but I'm just so tired of people acting like aspec/arospec characters are somehow wrong or unfair for not being willing to do everything exactly like their allo partners want them to. They don't owe their partners sex, period. I don't think people say it maliciously (at least most of the time, some of the "fixing Lucanis' writing because it's trash and he's too hot to be wasted like that" takes aside,) but it comes across that way to me because it's the exact sort of thing I hear about myself and other aspec people in real life, and it hurts to know that we can't even escape that in fiction with the very few characters we can honestly genuinely see ourselves in like this.

[practically-an-x-man]

Fanfic Couples*/Relationships Ask Game

*note that when I say "couple", this does not have to indicate a romantic couple, it's just the most concise way to refer to a pair of characters. These can be any two characters, romantic or not.

Of the ones you've written, which romantic relationship has developed the fastest? How fast is it?

Of the ones you've written, what's your slowest slowburn? How slow is it?

Have you ever written a soulmate AU? If you haven't, why would/wouldn't you write one?

What's the fastest you've reached a romantic couple's first kiss (in words/scenes/chapters)? First "I love you"? Other landmarks?

Do you have any works where you refuse to reach a certain relationship landmark, for one reason or another?

Have you ever started to write a relationship and had it develop differently than you expected? How so?

Have you written any romantic couples that you think would be better off as friends? Or even enemies?

Have you ever written any friendships that could've easily become romantic relationships? How did you navigate it?

When you write, do you plan out the stages of a relationship, or just let it flow? Do you have any works where the characters seem to "write themselves"?

[Couple] has just been struck by a magic spell, and now they're mortal enemies! What happens now?

[Couple] has just stumbled into a fairy ring, and they've forgotten they ever knew each other! What happens now?

[Couple] has just found an interdimensional portal, and one of them just walked in! Does the other go after them?

Are there any consistent trends when you write a budding relationship, or does it vary by character? If there are trends, what are they?

Are there any relationship dynamics/tropes you want to write in the future, but haven't yet?

Are there any relationship dynamics/tropes you would never write?

Are there any relationship dynamics/tropes you enjoy reading about, but wouldn't want to write yourself? Vice versa?

Did you base [couple] on any existing relationships that you've seen? This can be anything: TV characters, books, even people you've known in real life.

Pick a few characters you've written for (or, for a fun twist, asker chooses). Tell me about their relationship in three sentences or less.

Pick a work/fandom you've written for. If your couple didn't end up together, who would they get close with with instead?

Has a character ever felt pulled in two directions as you wrote them? How did you resolve this?

Not all relationships are romantic. What's your favorite non-romantic relationship that you've written about?

Have you ever written a break-up scene? How did it go? Was it a permanent split?

Do you think you idealize relationships in fiction, or are your depictions grounded in reality? How often do your characters make mistakes?

When you write, do you focus more on the romantic relationships or the non-romantic ones?

How important to you is the inclusion of sex in writing a romantic couple? Do you have any asexual characters?

Do you have any characters that are arospec or otherwise wouldn't enter a romantic relationship? How do they interact with the story?

Do you have any characters who are hopeless romantics? How do they interact with the story?

Have you ever written a tragic romance? How did it turn out?

What's the most interesting friendship that you've written?

What's the most interesting familial relationship that you've written? Found family counts.

Are there any songs that remind you of [couple]? Are there any songs that remind them of each other?

Do you find it more fun to write soft, domestic romances, or dramatic thrillers?

Are there any canon romantic couples, in any media, that you just can't stand?

Are there any well-known fanon relationships (not canon), that you just can't stand?

Are there any canon non-romantic relationships you can't stand?

Have you ever overwritten a canon romance in favor of a different character/OC? Did you write a full breakup or just ignore the canon relationship?

Who's the Barbie and who's the Ken? Who's the Allan?

Who's the Romeo and who's the Juliet? Who's the Rosaline?

Who's the Prince Charming and who's the Damsel in Distress? Who's the dragon?

Pick a relationship (not necessarily romantic). What tropes apply to this relationship? What tropes does this relationship subvert?

Who's your most repressed/oblivious character? Who's your most aware character? What makes them different?

As an author, are you gentle to your characters?

How do you feel about unhappy endings? Unrequited love? Major character death?

What's your favorite type of relationship to write? What makes it most fun for you?

What type of relationship do you struggle most to write? Why is it difficult for you?

Are there any character dynamics that you've found yourself stepping outside your comfort zone to write? How so?

What's the most self-indulgent relationship you've written? Are there any particular moments/scenes that you wrote just for you?

Are there any relationships you've lost passion for writing? Are there any relationships that started slow but gained momentum over time?

What's your favorite relationship dynamic that you've seen in another work of fiction? Has this influenced your writing at all?

Free space! Brag on yourself! Advertise your writing! What are you most proud of recently?

[rolaplayor101]

So I've just read your post "A Silent Voice Aspec Analysis" and I am so happy but I wanted to ask is...how exactly is Shoya from OAA rep? Could you direct me to all instances which made you think that he is? Thank you in advance!

9/13/22

So it’s been a year and a half since I got this ask and I’m only now answering it— I think about this ask a lot, and it’s not that I don’t want to answer it, it’s that I was waiting for the right time. I wanted to answer it during either asexual awareness week or Arospec awareness week last year or even the year before, but either because I forgot or because I procrastinated it, I never got to it. Now it's ASAW 2024, and I have finally decided to lay down and write this essay, so here we go:

There’s a few points I want to discuss, but in respect for the reader’s time, I will lay them all out right here as a tl;dr before I write them all out thoroughly.

Shoya shows himself to be both repulsed by romance and sexuality as soon as it is pointed towards him. This presents itself in his dialogue, his facial expressions, and his thoughts throughout A Silent Voice.

Shoya often is seen blushing in most instances, whether he’s with Shoko or not, of if he’s embarrassed or upset or  neutral. With this point, I think it’s poignant to say he has rosacea. 

Shoya himself says multiple times that he is not interested in Shoko, who is his main concern for all of the manga. 

The way other characters in A Silent Voice show attraction is completely different from anything Shoya ever does. 

The movie changes certain aspects of the manga to get the overall point across and stick to the most important plot lines. One of the things that it changes is literally all the scenes where the other characters assume Shoya likes Shoko romantically, unless it specifically pertains to Shoko’s side of the story, the character who DOES have romantic feelings in this pair for the other. 

Shoya shows his immense dislike for romance and sex a variety of times, as aforementioned, but does seem to enjoy physical, sensual touch, including holding hands, and, secondly, the only time he feels jealousy in reference to other people's relationships is not when he thinks Shoko is dating someone, but when he sees her getting closer platonically with other people(Sahara).

The entire story is about Shoya trying to redeem himself for past deeds, and learning what friendship is. Romance only ever ties in when it’s related to other people that aren’t him. 

This might have to be split into multiple posts because I have a lot of manga panels to use as reference. First, let’s start at the beginning. On the very first page of chapter one, we are immediately met by Shoya experiencing allonormativity and looking extremely annoyed. As soon as he hears the word “boyfriend” he is amiss, as is implied by the boldness of the word boyfriend. He immediately informs them that he’s not her boyfriend, with a sweating face, and balling in on himself, a thing he does multiple times to show he’s uncomfortable and anxious, while also always having the four little blush marks under his eyes as a character design choice, not a proof of attraction.

In fact, one of the first things we learn about Shoya is that he doesn’t like girls, next to the fact that he’s not supposed to jump into the River, he doesn’t like his mom’s nickname for him, and that he has a sister whose boyfriend sucks, because he can’t “play with them”. Crushing on one doesn’t even cross his mind, but it does for everyone else he interacts with in his class:  

“isn’t that great, Ishida?” Naoka asks in response to learning that the new transfer student is a girl.

“Huh? I don’t give a crap!!” He replies, his expression one of genuine confusion and annoyance, with his eyebrows furrowed downwards and his pupils small, mouth low on his face without a hint of a smile or blush.

Shortly after we have a montage of him bullying Shoko along with his friends, we are met with his first instance of romance repulsion at a young age:

Amongst being touched— holding hands with a girl— he does not blush or smile, neither does flowers appear around him in thematic fashion of romantic attraction; instead, he looks angry, his brows furrowing, even the lines of rosacea on his face  disappearing to show him paling in disgust. The next panel with his face shows him grimacing, a shadow falling over his eyes and bags appearing under his eyes with sweat pouring down his face. He is not enjoying the physical touch from her. Finally, as he whips his arm away, a blush appears on his face, but only as he hears his friends behind him laughing at him. He’s embarrassed and angry. We get the second bout of amatonormativity from his friends:

He’s blushing, but not from attraction, like his friends joke, but in embarrassment. The next scene shows Ishida saying a word that appears over and over from here on, and the dialogue is, “she’s creepin’ me out” as he walks away with Kazu and Hirose. We will get back to that. 

This is only the beginning of Shoya’s journey through navigating allonormativity and deconstructing what friendship means to him. His “friends” aren’t good ones, for sure, and this comes up as a theme throughout. In fact, the allonormativity keeps on even til the end, but I’ll expand on that later, as well. Skip only a 20 pages later, and you’ll see this little scene:

Here, Shoya actively reveals his repulsion towards romance once again by even just being around a place where people go on dates often, and gets angry and upset. Now, it is a common trope for children in tv to hate romance and be seen to grow out of it, as if it’s childish to see it as disgusting and unlikeable, but, in Shoya’s case, even as time passes, he continues to share these feelings, although more quietly, with his elementary school self. Even here, when he’s all scratched up, you can see the blush on his face when he notices Shoko seeing him, but again, this blush, in context, doesn’t seem to be one of attraction, but of embarrassment. In context, he’d just been pushed around by his ex-friends, and chastised by his mom, and has now been seen kicking a wall. There’s no romantic tension or reasoning to this scene for it to be a blush of romantic attraction on his face. 

Time skip to him in his teen years, senior year, in chapter 5:

He’s being a bit dramatic by the end, but even so, in the beginning, it’s obvious that his thoughts are his own. In the ten year anniversary edition, his dialogue is, “And you butt-ugly bastards, stop talking about dating. It makes me sick.” This change in dialogue leaves out the “it doesn’t suit you” which can change the connotation a little bit. It changes the meaning from, “You acting like you can date the way you are is creepy” to “just talking about romance at all is gross to me”. And then, sexually, it’s also the same. It’s not only romance, but sex that also creeps him out. “That goes for you too.” (These are also taken out of the movie, because it’s once again not relevant, and also makes Shoya more palpable as a character you can be sorry for. His comments here do sound a lot like endorsing rape culture in a victim blaming kind of way). Then there’s this little nugget a few pages after:

“Apparently, there are some things in this world you just can’t attain. The moment I realized that, my future became clear.” 

One of the noticeable things he “can’t attain” is a girl or boy to be in a relationship with in high school. That, or if you look at it in things he can’t be a part of, like, say, being in the class photo, or getting into college, or being In a group of friends, or having a full head of hair, etc., it’s also possible to view the scene of him walking past the couple as him not being able to  avoid seeing couples, as all the other things he is actively working towards or interacting with/looking at. As in, “I won’t be able to be in the class photo, I won’t be able to avoid couples, I won’t be able to go to college, I won’t be able to make friends”, or, “I won’t be able to be in a relationship” whether that being because no one wants him or because he himself doesn’t want to be in one despite everyone else in school wanting it so badly, due to the allonormativity he’s experienced convincing him that’s the case. 

After this scene, we are back in media rez, where he just denied being her boyfriend. In that context, he just the other day thought about romance being something he either can’t attain because he doesn’t want it, or can’t get it, and when these aunties call him Shoko’s boyfriend, he shows a rather plain disgust and discomfort with it, implying that it’s something he doesn’t want, instead of can’t get. 

Then we get this legendary scene: ”Nishimiya…could you…and me..be friends?”

He has a blush here that is unlike the usual four lines we see on his cheeks under his eyes; this one is further into his cheekbones, and it's not from anger or embarrassment, but rather from a shyness. And this shyness doesn’t come from romantic feelings, but for platonic feelings. His words inform the expression, that he wants a friendship with her. And then this happens:

His expression changes instantly. It’s not necessarily one of disgust, but of panic, of discomfort. He’s still blushing, but he’s sweating now, just like before, in elementary school, and he can also hear the ladies in the back making comments just like his friends from before. He’s not angry, as his brows are raised instead of furrowed, but he’s deeply unsettled. 

In this next set of panels, Shoko notices the ladies and pulls away, and Shoya’s face is a bit different and more comical. He’s still sweating and blushing, but his mouth is open wider as if to say something, and his hand is limp. When she pulls back. There’s a spark that’s closer to her than it is to him, which I think symbolizes a sudden awareness on her part rather than his. He also looks a bit happier that she let go, with only one sweat drop on his face instead of multiple. His brows are also more relaxed, and his mouth jaw is closing slightly. This is presumably how Shoko is seeing him in this moment.

 And when someone interrupts, presumably one of the women who were laughing at him, he gets all stiff again and his blush mostly disappears. Then the panels start being viewed from either Shoya’s side or from his perspective again. Fast forward to when they’re feeding bread to fish a few minutes later. 

He blushes at the thought that he’s having a normal friendly conversation with Shoko, the girl he used to hate, not just “a girl” or “a person my age that’s a girl for the first time since I hit puberty”. He’s not blushing at a romantic encounter or moment, but that he’s making a friend, he’s nervous that he has zits in his face, not because he thinks she’s pretty or something like that, that doesn’t even cross his mind, but that he can have a positive relationship with someone who isn't in his family or someone he works with. And someone he ruthlessly bullied five or six years ago.

Another example of his Asexuality comes right after this, when they both jump into the water under the bridge to rescue Shoko’s old notebook. He accidentally looks up and sees her skirt lifted, but he immediately closes his eye and looks down again without a blush on his face, and immediately focuses back in on finding the notebook without even a moment to get his bearings. It doesn’t bother him at all.

sorry about the bad quality, i had to take this picture for the sake of time instead of finding it online. 

The next chapter features the biggest theme of the entire manga and anime besides redemption:

This is brought up again once Shoya meets Yuzuru, who wants to keep him away from Shoko. Yuzuru asks, “Are you really her friend?” And it brings about this entire thought process for Shoya, again and again, in the series. And then he meets Nagatsuka: 

This is an example of my second point: Shoya’s blushing. A lot of “evidence” people give for Shoya liking Shoko is that he blushes around her a lot. This is a false equivalence, for Shoya blushes all the time and for anyone and any reason. Here, Nagatsuka does something extraordinarily nice to him for no reason, and he blushes, his confusion evident in the furrow of his brow and him asking, “Why’d you do all that for me?” In the 10th anniversary edition. Nagatsuka’s friendship from here on causes him to blush just as much as Shoko, and it doesn’t stop there. Later in the series when he befriends Miki, he’s also seen blushing around her, and not only that, but there are symbols seen around characters all the time to forward the notion of different points of view within a panel.

Image 1: Blush blush blush~ all of this at the notion of friendship, a complete turn around from whenever anyone mentions romance or sex around him. He’s forming connections with people for the first time since middle school, or even elementary school, to further Point 7. His need for platonic relationships greatly overshadows any hint of romance that is ever brought up, especially with Shoko. 

Image 2: Miki sees herself as cute, which is why the bubbles appear around her, signaling a slight pov change. Shoya himself never shows any interest in Miki, nor Miki for him, and it especially shows in this scene with his expression and his thoughts not at all aiming towards her. And when Miki says Mashiba is handsome, a particularly aesthetic,  romantic, or sexual form of attraction, this is something Shoya doesn’t even notice; yet, when she says Mashiba wants to be his friend, his eyes go wide with sudden interest. His disinterest towards romance and sex also take into account men, as well. 

Image 3: once again, Miki has bubbles around her, but this is not Shoya’s pov until the next panel. This is a good example of background and environmental symbolism not necessarily reflecting on Shoya’s own thoughts and feelings, but those around him. 

If we go to the movie, in image 1, this scene is shown with Shoya and Nagatsuka doing a secret handshake, which has a lingering touch between them that doesn’t make Shoya uncomfortable like Shoko’s attempt at handshakes/handholding does, and it’s in the midst of a conversation about friendship, in contrast to how the ladies from sign class assumed it to be a romantic thing with Shoko and Shoya. And speaking of, shortly after image 1, we run into them again: 

Once again, the blush appears, but his brows furrow and he has a frown on his face that shows his discomfort, along with the sweat. He runs away because he’s embarrassed, not because there’s any truth to what they’re saying. This bring us again to point 3: Shoya points out multiple times that he does not like Shoko romantically. For the sake of convenience, I’ll add the rest of the times that he does this, and the chapters, to show that he doesn’t change his mind even by the end of the manga. 

chapter 15

Chapter 20 (genuine confusion, doesn’t see it as romantic in the slightest, regular rosacea blush on his face. Pure amatonormativity and relationship hierarchy)

chapter 21

chapter 40 (this one needs further explaining but I’ll do it in the next post)

chapter 41

chapter 61 (til the very end, the literal second to last chapter, his friend is being allonormative while he’s perfectly happy and blushing at his friendship with Shoko. His expression holds a seriousness that implies it’s not a joke on his part, as well as the excited look he has as he gets an answer to the question)

Since I can only post 30 picture at a time on tumblr, I’ll stop the post right here and finish on a reblog some day. Yes, I know about the interviews with the author, and yes, I’ll supply those in due time as well. 

[shouldtheybearomantic]

Got a character you headcanon as arospec? Got a character that's allo but would probably be better off as aro? Got a character you're just curious to see public opinion on? You've come to the right place!

Here, you can submit characters that I, the manager of this blog, will present for public execution examination! However, there are a few rules that you should follow regarding submissions:

First, check the submission spreadsheet to make sure your character hasn't already been suggested. To make finding them easier, you can use Control+F, Command+F on Mac, or Find in your device's browser settings and search for the character/media's name! Duplicate suggestions will be deleted.

Submissions that include real people will also be deleted. I understand this can be a fuzzy area when it comes to situations such as live-action actors or video game roleplayers, but please only suggest the characters these people play, not the humans behind them.

Characters must not be recognized as arospec in canon, whether confirmed in the media they appear in or by an author/official source. This is Should They Be Aro, not Are They Aro (/lh).

Keep in mind that this is an arospec centered blog. While aromantic/asexual headcanons are of course welcomed with open arms, alloromantic/asexual headcanons will unfortunately be discarded.

Current submission volume: empty (yes, we are still accepting submissions!)

Current poll schedule: as submissions come in

For the time being, you are welcome to suggest multiple characters in a row (within reason, and not in the same submission), but don't suggest more than one character from the same piece of media so that we can cover a variety of test subjects fandoms. Also, this is liable to change should this blog ever receive more suggestions than can be kept up with---if that happens, a public announcement will be made.

Character polls will be tagged with both the character's name and their media of origin. For example, if I wanted to find a poll for Lance from the Kanto/Johto Pokemon games (who is aroace in my opinion and no one can change my mind /lh), I could search #lance pokemon or just #pokemon and probably find him.

Propaganda for both sides is encouraged! Just please be respectful---whether you agree or disagree on a character's potential aromantism, everyone's opinion is equally valid. After all, the most fun part about these polls is getting to see all the differing perspectives!

Lastly, a very important thing to note: I will do my best not to exclude any submissions unless I think they could be genuinely offensive/triggering to anyone or I consider it distasteful. This does not necessarily include media with a generally bad reputation (take the dsmp, just as an example)! If you personally dislike a character or piece of media, move on and do not interact. If you try to be hateful or start a fight, I have no problem blocking you. However, if you believe that a submission is genuinely problematic, dm me with an explanation and I will investigate further!

[se7ens-oc-heaven]

Jakob! (hopefully that's the correct spelling hdjdhdh)

Ok so did this and a bunch of others literally years ago, but for each one I had a question I'd stall on so then I just. Never actually posted. Any of these.

So I'm fixing that now! Context is this was a character ask prompt - might be the template was thanks to @iolitewyvern ? If so lmk so I can link it properly I lost the original post lmao

As for spelling, it can be! Jake's name spelling denotes if he's in the fantasy au setting or not. Jakob is fantasy, Jacob is not. So I answered these based on fantasy Jake!

(Best image I have, but it's normal Jake and also humanized lmfao. He's like. Sonic furry wolf so ykno. Picrew source)

Who are they?

Full name?  Jakob Alhers

Nicknames? Jake

Gender/pronouns? Male, he/him

Orientation? Demiromantic/arospec, gay

Age/Birthday? About 16, birthday is on a separate calendar than ours but is most likely in the local winter months of his home country.

Fun fact! Zodiac? ^^^^ (would most likely be Capricorn)

What’s their personality?

Major good traits? Cares deeply about others around him, dry sense of humor

Major flaws? Very prideful while also having zero value of self

Goals?  Living up to what is expected of him, as royalty and a deity

Fears? Hurting another with his own actions, losing someone important to him

Optimistic or pessimistic? Pessimistic

Introvert, extrovert, or ambivert? Introvert all the way

Empathetic or un-empathetic? Hmm... he can empathize if he's aware, but he struggles to pick up cues... so maybe that's more sympathetic?

Do they wait and plan or dive right in? Bit of both, he tries to plan but if he's panicked or upset enough he'll lose his cool and charge in

Do they go with the flow or forge their own path? He will not go with the flow. Out of spite even.

Relations to the world?

Who’s their family? His mother Allison, and his father Alher

Where are they from? (Gestures vaguely at northern fantasyland)

Where do they live now? (Gestures to same vague region)

Do they have a job? If so, what is it? Crown prince of his country

How are they with technology? He's in your very basic very generic fantasy au so uh. Not great if he ever saw any lmao

Connections to religion or spirituality? Well his dad is a literal god, does that count?

Powers or magic? He has strong ice magic that grows stronger with age.

Fun fact! Connections to the lore? He is in fact a demigod, son of Winter itself

Favorites?

Favorite season/weather? Summer, hot and sunny days

Favorite place? He hides in his room a lot, so it's hard to say.... Maybe his room lmao

Favorite food? Probably some sort of steak dish? Idk, something I'm not familiar with lol

Favorite clothes/accessories? He's limited for various reasons, but highly values sentimental accessories, such as his family crest brooch or jewelry made for him by Pandora

Favorite animal? He's a furry so this is a loaded question to answer lmao. Might not even be an animal as we know it.

Favorite/most frequently used mode of transportation? I think he prefers to walk places himself...? He doesn't usually travel lol

Favorite holiday? Doubt it'd be one we know of, although he doesn't strike me as big on social events like most holidays are

Hobbies? Sculpting, practicing swordfighting

Favorite thing about themself? He takes a lot of pride in his swordfighting skills, at least for a prince ;)

Relationships?

Best friends? Nerezza

Closest family member? He's close with both parents, but spends more bonding time with his mom overall

Partner/s? Pandora DeSales

Enemies? He considers the murderous Crow an enemy for constantly attacking his loved ones

What organizations/clubs/etc are they in? N/A

Fun fact! What are they like with their best friend or partner? With his partner Pandora, Jakob drops a lot of his composed and distant persona, he can be a bit childish but is also a lot more casual and easy to make laugh. He's also not afraid to play the sly prank or do other shit he knows he can get away with just to mess with him.

With Nerezza he isn't quite as open in the same way, but the two of them bond over being snarky royal spawn with little affinity for their title or the expectations that come with it. The sarcasm in the room tends to increase tenfold if you put these two together.

[heatwa-ves]

you asked me ritsu ships so for you i wanna know abt izumi ships: izuleo izunaru izuritsu. and also arashi ships: narumika naruritsu (naruritsumika too if you will) and naruhiyo !!

putting this under a readmore because I wrote a Lot more than expected

izumi ships: izuleo red izuritsu purple izunaru yellow

izuleo I adore ofc they're the most important people to eachother they love eachother so much they've hurt eachother they're silly their interactions are always great their history together.. lionheart checkmate judgement etc.. explodes them. aro4aro 👍

izuritsu I really really like not necessarily in a romantic way because I think they're both some sort of arospec (izumi aro and ritsu demi I think) but anyway I really like their relationship I think my favourite thing is that they're genuinely very similar to eachother irt likee their relationships with mao and makoto which aren't the same but are similar extreme attachment to a childhood friend and obsessing over them in order to block out the bad things etc and so they Get It in a way others don't, but they also have opposing personalities that work well together izumi is quick to get annoyed and more strict whereas ritsu is more laid back they kinda balance eachother out. ritsu is also incredibly perceptive and intelligent with a good grasp of other people and so I think there are times where he knows izumi better than izumi knows himself. ritsus idol story 2 is one of my favs of them interacting and they also have some nice interactions in next door iirc but I can't find the screenshots. in my own personal canon I think they come together after leo leaves school and they get really close in that period of time izumi is at his worst and ritsu isn't great either but like I said they understand eachother in a way few other people would.

izunaru I really like but not romantically they're eachothers oldest friends they've seen the the other at their worst and stuck around regardless and that's so important to me. their interactions in euthanasia are honestly everything to me especially their conversation near the end about how they've never been loved in the way they wanted but even now they're in a popular unit with lots of fans and lots of good friends it's still not enough theyre similar in this regard naru says to izumi about how she's always wanted love but never got it in the way she wanted i.e. not being seen as a girl etc and so she comforts herself by saying she's the one who loves herself most and izumi says he understands and he's the same and he's seen her when she's selfish and arrogant and imperfect and he loves her regardless. well he doesn't actually say he loves her because this is izumi sena we're talking about but that's what he gets across. and he says he's far worse than she's ever been he also didn't get love in the way he wanted (interestingly he phrases this with a food/eating metaphor. talk to me about izumi and his relationship with food it's so. It's so.) And then there's this which is sosososo important

now onto other naru ships!! having to rush these because I have work in fifteen minutes 😓😓

green is naruhiyo purple is naruritsu black is narumika

naruhiyo I adore they work so well together and they just make me happy there's obv the pretty 5 story where they interact and getto spectacle too but ofc im very behind on stories so I haven't read that one 😓😓 maybe I'll get back to it after exams idk. Anyway. I've talked about them extensively before I don't need to go on more I just really like them and I think they should kiss and go on cute dates . love wins. also if I don't have a wlw ship in every media I like I'll start dying graphically so let me have this they're important to me

I was into narumika a lot more when I was first into enstars but now I don't think about mika all that much they're not one of my fav characters and obv I haven't been keeping up with the story sooo. I don't dislike him but they're not as important to me as knights or switch or crazyb yk. Anyway I still think narumika is soooo cute they're best friends and I can definitely see it being romantic too there's that one story I think it's shards of time? mikas one where they're out shopping together and he wants to make her a gift and makes a brooch and then kaoru asks if it's for a date and Mika doesn't deny it. there's another story I think victoria? and it's got narumika + shu interactions that one is also great

naruritsu I love so much as well their relationship is so sweet there's that part where ritsu says about how he likes to sleep on her lap and he loves her the most or whatever and also their relationship as the seniors of knights now that izumi and Leo are in italy is also really interesting it gives them a leadership role neither of them have really had before ofc kasa is the actual leader but these two are the oldest without izumi and leo and theyve been in knights longer than kasa so I think this new authority as well as having to figure out themselves and their life after graduation would bring them closer together anyway wish I could talk more about them but im like ten seconds away from my work building so ill leave it here 💖

[mevweisel]

won't keep this too long lmao // not proofread (i really wanted to make a formal version of this but eventually decided to keep it intimate and casual) 1. not having to force myself to be affectionate (romantically) with other people. for example they know i'm touch-averse so i don't feel obligated to initiate touch. same goes for relationships. it's hilarious to see their appalled faces when i tell them i don't want to be in a relationship 2. actually none. or maybe people's invasive questions. allos are obsessed with relationships so i always end up having to tell them [time and time again] that i'm not interested. i was also forced to reciprocate one of my suitors' affections when i was younger because every student in my section was forcing me to. i liked him, but in a queerplatonic manner, and when i confronted him about wanting to simply be friends with him, he took it too personally. i gave him a very "heartfelt" letter because i really, really felt guilty. i liked the idea of other people liking me but i really don't wish to reciprocate it. i just like the idea of being "liked". romance never really made me feel comfortable and i blocked him bc i was uncomfortable, then i got guilty again and unblocked him. all of the romantic scenarios they imposed upon me traumatized me and made me feel uncomfortable. i realized that i felt comfortable around my family and friends more and never felt the need to chase people for validation. perhaps when time comes i'll pursue one (preferably a queerplatonic one) but im a lot happier where i am currently. 3. bordeaux/burgundy 4. ooooo uh green. the green at the topmost region 5. sapphic n achillean. + the sunset aroace flag :D so pretty 6. all !! i love em all 7. nope, sadly </3 country isn't too accepting 8. being obsessed with dinos n ND-coded fandoms 9. about 2022 but i was still not sure that time with the suitor thing going on (as mentioned above). i really don't know where i identify in the spectrum and i don't wish to limit myself with a microlabel so the term 'arospec' works for me (+ it's a lot easier for people to digest) 10. i tried, with my irl friends. they're...tolerating, but not too accepting. 'aw mev you're going to be single forever?' 'wdym didn't you like the suitor or fictional characters' etc etc,, you know the whole story. one is sorta...accepting, though. but i never mentioned it again. after all, i only come out to people who'll understand me, i.e. temporary online friends or tumblr moots 11. that they're completely devoid of emotions. lmfao we're not robots + love, affection n attraction comes in different forms n ways 12. don't feel pressured. it is a spectrum, after all, and it's fluctuating. the most important thing is that you're comfortable about yourself. labels aren't important. we'll always be here for you every step of the way 13. loads, online! and a former classmate, but the former classmate still thinks im bi (bc i once identified as bi and didn't know what to properly label myself) bc we haven't talked for so long 14. nope! i rlly love it being a big fan of green myself 15. oooo, movie !! little miss sunshine. pure family movie. i love it. the best ever. 16. i don't think this is...specifically aro BUT soldier, poet, king. i just really love it and im glad romance wasn't ever mentioned or involved 17. the lord of the rings. i could talk about it for hours. and as much as i respect the shipping of characters i've always imagined them as a family instead. like frodo and sam's lifelong friendship 18. that aro blast meme!! the ones where the bald character questions the aro for liking fictional characters and then. BLAST. 19. OH MY GOD SUCH A HARD QUESTION. UHHHHH i love them all though !! frogs win this time <33 20. "you just haven't found the right person" wtf do you mean. i found the right person. malcolm tucker. and he's like a dad to me

Arospec Ask Game

To help get #aromantic trending I've come up with an ask game. Don't forget to tag you answers with #aromantic!

What's your favorite part of being arospec?

What's your least favorite part of being arospec?

Favorite color?

Favorite color from the aromantic pride flag?

Favorite pride flag, arospec or not,m

Favorite arospec blogger?

Ever been to a pride event?

Aro culture is....?

When did you realize you were arospec?

Have you come out to anyone? If so, who?

What do you think the biggest misconception is surrounding aromanticism?

What's your advice to someone questioning they are arospec?

Do you know other arospec people? (Online or off)

If you could change the aro flag, would you and why?

What's a movie that you get aro vibes from?

What's a song that you get aro vibes from?

What's a book that you get aro vibes from?

Favorite arospec meme?

Frogs, turtles, or kangaroos?

Question you wish people would stop asking when they find out you're arospec?

[aciddaffodil]

Last Gender: When We are Nameless Thoughts

This is one of the most meaningful stories I have ever read. It's centered around patrons of a sex bar called Bar California. A place where anyone is welcome regardless of their identity. The first chapter and the one-shot focus on newcomers to the bar on wives who were interested to see what kind of place their husbands went to cheat at. The welcoming environment of the bar allows them to open up to another patron to come to terms with their feelings and identities outside the crippling standards of society. They leave changed from the bar feeling empowered to face the world and their failed marriages.

However, the focus of the story is around the patrons who are in the "minority" when it comes to their gender and sexual identities. The author, Rei Taki, put a lot of care into researching these various queer identities and presenting them in a way that is atypical and breaks from stereotypes. For example, an aromantic person who enjoys having sex and trying new things (yes, that is valid). The dialogue can come off as very heavy handed and "educational," especially when talking with characters who aren't minorities, but it's handled very well and avoids being patronizing in its tone.

There are so many moments within this story that have touched me and that I adore even from characters who aren't within my identity and can't relate to, as I'm a nonbinary masc-leaning, arospec, and asexual. It's a testament to the writing for creating recurring characters that are sure of themselves and the way they identify because the focus of this story is how this community of bar patrons finds acceptance with each other and inspires one another to stay true to themselves. More stories are needed that celebrate queer joy.

The story following Marie, a bi-gender individual who comes to the bar femininely dressed and working up to her coming out to their wife is so important as it's the first non-sex motivated patron of the bar and sets the tone for the rest of the series. In conversation, Marie reveals that only recently did she start presenting this way after stumbling across Bar California as the feminine side of him was buried due to living as socially expected to. She talks about how happy it makes her to come to this place and to be accepted, but fears that continuing to lie to her wife about her identity may create suspicions of cheating. It's an incredibly brave thing to come out, but even more so, to a person who’s known you for decades and who has seen you in a masculine light. The fear he feels is valid, especially with the rigidity of Japanese culture and society. There's an ageism stigma around change especially for older queer people and more of a social impact as you’ve spent a good amount of your life living and presenting heteronormativity. 

A lot of stories tend to focus on younger queer individuals, which isn’t a bad thing, but they are often romantically focused and, in the minority, when it comes to talking and exploring genderqueer identities. This is why Marie feels so special to me because older queer characters are, dare I say, MORE important to see within media because anyone, no matter their age, can “come out of the closet.” This representation is needed as a way to 1) be there for older queer people and 2) learn to have more empathy for people around you if someone in your life happened to identify differently.I love that it's a happy ending and that his wife still loves him even if she doesn’t completely understand how Marie feels. 

Yukihiro believes its better to live “normally” because society is unfair making assumptions of others, as his partner was accidentally doxed and ended up committing suicide. He sneers at the bar's existence, saying it's a basement for people to hide and it's hypocritical for offering hope. This bitterness serves as a front for the survivor's guilt he has for being left alive while the love of his life is gone. He's living in this state of grief and anger at the world; for the hateful nature of society. It’s proven at the funeral of his partner where reporters flocked to the gay friends who attended to demand an opinion of them shows how cruelly insensitive mainstream media can be. These aren’t stories to be sensationalized or put on display. Why do queer people have to express their hurt and devastation to appear more human to society? It's sad that Asashi decided to kill himself even if he had someone who loved him so dearly.

It isn’t until he talks with Yo, the bartender, who tells him how Asashi spoke of the kindness Yuki holds and only wishes him happiness for his future. This conversation helps to motivate him to look forward in life and allows the weight of guilt off his shoulders.  Later on, his friends hold a marriage ceremony at the bar; he lingers outside and declines to attend saying, “ I’m going to celebrate under the sun.” I find that line so profound. He is happy for his friends for making this decision but wistful for Asahi and the what-if’s if life had worked out differently.My wishful thinking is that Yukihiro chooses to live more openly as a gay man and is able to have his own happy ending in the future. He no longer needs the bar—as it reminds him of the past and as a place to hide—he wants to live under the sun authentically himself.

The symbolism explored with Amiru, who is aromantic but enjoys sex and experimenting with various partners within her mind’s narration being that of a fairy tale, is so neat. As kids, we generally grow up with the expectation of having a romantic relationship and finding the “one” in life, often with someone of the opposite gender. Children's media like Disney movies perpetuate this ideal, especially in the Renaissance Era with stories where romance is an underlying plotline with an ending of "happily ever after" of finding love and getting married. Society and even the motto “love who you love” within the LGBT+ space factor into how alienating of an experience it can be for aromantic and arospec individuals because romance and relationship expectations are everywhere. That's why it's beautiful that Amiru embraces being “the protagonist of her own life” with the reassurance from one of her sex partners to take the center of the stage of her story and happiness. Even without a romantic attraction, she is still a person who doesn’t deserve to be shamed for having different priorities.

The final part of the story, as it's been built up through the interactions with various patrons and Taaka’s curiosity, is centered around the bartender Yo. We learn that they created this place out as a way to meet with all kinds of people to try and find a label or identity that feels like it would fit them. The combination of childhood trauma that hindered Yo’s, whose name is actually Sumi, perspective on life and robbed them of their youth and innocence is then coupled with the loss of their sister that devastated them. The bar became a coping mechanism for Sumi to avoid the confrontation of reality, especially as they have a standoffish vibe when it comes to personal conversations with patrons about themself. In the story, as it's been 6 or more years, this survivor's guilt keeps them isolated from others even when surrounded by all sorts of patrons at the bar; they wouldn’t open up to others around them until Taaka came along. All these interactions haven’t provided Sumi “an answer” of how to exist or to accept themselves. 

Sometimes the easiest answers are right in front of you, and too much introspection, no matter the topic, can give you tunnel vision. Taaka tells them that “Q” stands for questioning, referring to people who haven’t, can’t, or intentionally choose to not label themselves. It's an eye-opening experience of validation to have a meaning that finally fits, especially after searching for an answer for so long brings Sumi comfort. Words are  powerful because of the way it gives people self-determination and freedom to express themselves. The author deliberately chose to write Sumi this way and ends the manga with them because representation is needed like this: to show that gender, like sexual and romantic orientation, is a spectrum.

Final Thoughts

I think this is a very well-written episodic manga that tackles various lesser-known LGBIA+ identities in a natural progression for the patrons of Bar California. Its message about community and finding acceptance with others if you open yourself to it, is endearing to me. There is so much doubt and gloom for the future for a lot of people, especially those in the queer community. Even though there are references to discriminatory remarks and prejudices while characters talk about the frustration of living their identity that comes from family, peers, or strangers, it is an overly optimistic tone. The art is absolutely stunning and at 20 chapters it's a fairly quick read. There IS EXPLICIT SEX IN THIS with one nonconsensual moment of forcing a kiss. but other than that, it's great.

[arodabi]

okay, i’m finally getting around to writing this, and uhh ill say its for aro week too. this is written as an aro person directed at alloromantic people. when i refer to writing, i’m kind of using it as a general term for creative works. Here’s me throwing my hat in on the question:

Can you ship aromantic characters?

and my answer is,,,,, actually a question. Why do you want to ship aromantic characters? 

I want alloros to realize that for a lot of aros, we do not get to see ourselves represented often. I can actually count on like one hand how many popular canon aro characters there are, and on the whole, none of their identities are respected. people constantly try to weasel their way out of actually writing aro characters, or they just ignore or deny their identity outright. fandom spaces (hell creative spaces in general) are at best not welcoming to aros, and at worst actively hostile towards us. So when the first question brought up when a character gets canonically confirmed as aro is “okay cool but can i ship them???” or “that’s nice but how can i still write about my fave ship that involves them??” i want to fucking scream. its a slap to the face and it shows that people really do not give a shit about aros. you say stuff like that and all i hear is “my fictional ship is so much more important than representing your marginalized minority identity” so instead of me just sitting here and saying “yes you can totally ship aro characters, as long as you’re respectful!!!” i’m saying “can you stop and think why you want to shove an aro character into a romantic relationship at the first chance you get?? maybe you have some arophobia you haven’t worked on?? maybe since we live in an amatonormative world, you’re letting that influence your views??” because that question being the first thing out of your mouth when you see a character you like confirmed as aro? that’s already disrespectful towards aros in my book.

So back to my question, Why do you want to ship aromantic characters? is it because you can’t write characters without them being in romantic relationships? or because you think a character without a romantic relationship is boring? Because if so, that’s a bad reason and it sounds like amatonormativity is rotting your brain. 

Is it because you just really like a ship with the aro character? Because you can write two characters with a strong relationship without writing them as a couple. A strong friendship can hold just as much power as a romantic relationship.

Is it because fuck aros, i will write what I wanna write and I don't wanna write this character with their canon identity? because then you’re just an arophobic asshole that needs to work on your shitty opinions. aro representation is just as important as any other lgbtqia+ representation.

Now if you’re reading this and thinking “well i heard aros can be in queerplatonic relationships!” I want you to think for a second. Are you writing a qpr or are you writing a romantic relationship with the serial numbers filed off? Have you talked to aro people or read stuff actually written by us? because, yes, some qprs can look a lot like a romantic relationship from the outside, but that’s just it, you’re looking at it from the outside. qprs are more than just “romantic relationship with extra steps”, and i think it’s really telling how many times i see alloromantic people saying they’re depicting an aro character in a qpr, not a romantic relationship, but then they never ever make any effort to distinguish the qpr from any other romantic relationship they write or draw. It just feels like qprs are getting used by alloros as a gatcha any time an aro person objects to how they depict (or don’t depict) aromanticism. if you want to write a character in a qpr then go for it! but you need to actually do research, talk to aros, get multiple opinions and not just take the first opinion that agrees with you and run with it.

“But what about headcanoning a character as arospec?” now i will say before i go into this, i am aro, not arospec, so if an arospec person wants to come in and correct me at any part here im happy to listen. but my problem when alloros bring up arospec identities is a very similar problem to how qprs are often depicted. I remember when Peridot Stevenuniverse got confirmed aro (she did, do not argue this with me) people were jumping over themselves to assure everyone that “a character getting confirmed as aro just means they are any arospec identity” which,, uhh,, not true? i mean if an arospec person wants to see a canon aro character as, say, aroflux, i’ve got no problem, aro and arospec people can do what they want really. but, i do have a problem with all the alloro fans who were spreading this. because, do you really see the character as demiromantic? or are you using that identity to deflect criticism from erasing aro identities? are you actually trying to write a good depiction of a demiro person? or are you just writing normal ship stuff and slapping a “uwu ive never felt romantic attraction until i met you! and now i will act exactly like any alloromantic person!” at the beginning? being in fandom spaces, i do see the occasional fic actually depicting an aspec identity (i say aspec her because aro is so rare that most of these examples i’ve seen have been acespec identities rather than arospec) but like 99% of the time, that’s written by someone who actually shares the identity. before you use our terms and identities to cover your ass when you erase us, consider not fucking doing that. consider listening to all aros and getting our thoughts and input. 

And last here is “but what about romance positive aros?” now i think most of what i’ve said previously can be applied here. the only thing i wanna add is, i think its very interesting that almost every time i see non aros depict aros, they always write them as very into romance, very open to be in romantic relationships, and very quiet about their aro identity. despite the character in canon not showing any of these traits. romance positive aros are good and important, but not every aro is romance positive. there’s quite a few of us that are romance repulsed, and alloros only depicting aros as super romance positive no matter what is suspicious to say the least. if an aro character is shown to be open to participating in romantic activities in canon then of course write them that way. but if an aro character is shown to be uninterested in, or even actively against romantic activities then respect that too.

so, to wrap up my thoughts in this ramble: please ask yourself why you want to ship aro characters so bad, because if the only reason is that amatonormativity has brainwashed you into not being able to write, or draw, or do anything with a character without them being in a romantic relationship, then you uhhh need to work on that, that’s honestly a writing/creative flaw imo. if you like the relationship dynamic between an aro character and another character, consider making them friends. friendship is not less powerful than romantic relationships. nobody is ever too old for the power of friendship trope. If you’re erasing an aro character’s identity because fuck aros, then fuck off somewhere far away from me and work on your bullshit. qprs, arospec identities, and romance positive aros are all very real, very important parts of the aro community, but please talk to other aros about them and actually make an effort to understand how these things work, dont just assume. And also don’t use these things as a way to erase aro identities and cover your ass if get called out. its disrespectful towards all aros.

The most important thing to do before writing or creating work with aro characters is to talk to aros, and not just the aros that agree with you. look up what a qpr actually is, learn how aros experience their arospec identities, talk to aros with multiple outlooks on romance. and if you can’t bring yourself to reach out, at least read through our own writings, whether that’s fiction, or informational posts, fuck, look through our memes if u wanna. Just please actually make an effort.

So, Can you ship aro characters? its complicated. look at trends in your fandom, question why you want to, and do research. Be an aro ally, listen to us. That’s really the most important thing.

[aro-and-tired]

Aromantic prompts

In honor of Aromantic Awareness Week, I have put down a series of prompts you may use for aromantic themed fiction, fanart, or other creations. I’ve organized them into various categories for ease of navigation and so that you can easily skip certain sections if they upset you. I hope someone will find this list useful, no need to credit me if you do want to use any of these prompts.

Also, I apologize if I don’t have a prompt about your specific identity, I tried to give a variety of prompts but I only had so many ideas.

Under a cut because this is a pretty long list!

General Aromanticism

Character A is aromantic. Show what they value in life, which people are important to them and what makes them happy.

Character A is a loveless aro. Show what this means to them and what bring them happiness other than love.

Character A is a lovequeer aro. Show what this means to them and what love is to them.

Characters A, B, C, etc. are all aromantic and decide to create an aromantic support group at their school/college/workplace. How does it go?

Character A is romance repulsed, and has had to spend the day witnessing romance happening around them. Finally they get home, where their partner/pet/hobby helps distract them.

Character A has decided to dress all in green to show their aro pride. This may or may not be a good idea, depending on how many clashing shades of green they are wearing.

Character A comes out as aro to the people around them. How do the other people react? Did they know about aromanticism?

Arospec Identities

Character A and Character B identify with different arospec identities, and argue about whose pride flag is prettier.

Character A is demiromantic. Character B is freyromantic. The two of them like to say that they trade romantic attraction as they get to know people.

Character A is quoiromantic or nebularomantic. They ask some alloromantic friends to explain romance to them, hoping it may help them distinguish various feelings. Every answer they get only works to confuse them more.

Character A is arospike and goes through a few days of very intense and unexpected feelings for Character B before their attraction fades once again.

Character A is greyromantic. Everyone else had their first crush as teenagers, they get to have theirs in their thirties.

Character A is cupioromantic, and daydreams about what they would like in a romantic relationship.

Character A occasionally experiences romantic attraction, but they are also romance repulsed. How do they navigate this area?

Character A is aegoromantic and is so excited about having found the best fanfiction of their OTP ever.

Character A is idemromantic. How do they decide whether they are feeling romantic attraction or not?

Character A is lithromantic. They have a crush on Character B, and at one point came to the conclusion that maybe B liked them back. B later clarifies they don’t actually have romantic feelings for A. This is the most relieving moment of A’s life.

Character A is a bit of a labels hoarder. They identify with multiple arospec identities. Show how these various identities come into play in their life.

Self Discovery

Character A finds out about aromanticism. They realize the identity (or a more specific arospec identity) fits their experiences perfectly. They are relieved by realizing here are other people like them.

Character A finds out they are aromantic. They share this with Character B. After a while, B goes to A to ask for more information, as they think they may be aromantic as well.

Character A and Character B don’t know they both are arospec (they may not have found out, or they live in a setting where the word aromantic doesn’t exist). They talk about their common experiences with not understanding romance.

Character A remembers an event from their childhood, realizing that that was a major early sign of being aro.

Nonpartnering

Character A has just moved into their dream house. What is it like?

Character A explains to someone how they can be happy and fulfilled without a romantic relationship.

Character A is nonpartnering, but they still want to have children. How do they go at it?

Character A and Character B are both nonpartnering, and they bond over their mutual disinterest in relationships.

Character A is a nonpartnering aro, while their friend Character B is a partnering aro. They have different goals in life, but they still support each other’s choices.

Queerplatonic Relationships

Character A finds out about QPRs. They knew their relationship with Character B was different than what they had with other friends, and now they wonder if they were in some kind of QPR without realizing it.

Character A and Character B are in a QPR. Character C and Character D are also in a QPR. The four of them go on a double platonic date.

Character A has multiple QPRs with other characters. Show the differences in their various relationships.

Character A and Character B used to date, but it didn’t work out. However, they work out very well as QPPs.

Character A wants to ask Character B to be their QPP, but they don’t know how. Shenanigans ensue as Character C tries to coach A on it.

Character A is aro, Character B is allo. B has romantic feelings for A, but they still think a QPR is by far the best choice of relationship.

Sexual Relationships

Character A is a virgin, and asks their friend Character B to help them out.

Character A and Character B are both curious about a certain kink, and decide to experiment with it together.

Character A and Character B are in a non romantic, committed D/s relationship. Show how it works.

Character A goes through mating cycles of some sort. Character B is their go to sexual partner for these cycles.

Character A enjoys having no strings attached on night stands. Show how a night out goes for them.

Romantic Relationships

Character A is grey or demi and has developed feelings for Character B. They want to act on it, but don’t know how. Their alloromantic friend Character C tries to help them.

Character A is dating Character B when they realize they are aro, and confess it to B. B at first is confused, but as they do research they realize that they are aro as well.

Character A and Character B are both romance favorable aros, but they have never dated. They decide to go on a few dates together to see what romance is like, and realize they enjoy doing romantic things with each other.

Character A is alloromantic and has romantic feelings for Character B, but never did anything about it since they knew B is aromantic. B is romance favorable, and when they find out A is attracted to them decides to try asking them out.

Character A and Character B get married for tax benefits.

Arophobia

Character A’s family is unsupportive of their aromantic identity. They reach out to their friends instead, who help them cope.

Character A has internalized arophobia. Show how they overcome this and learn how to embrace themselves.

Character A is romance favorable, and thinks this means they can’t be aro after all. How do they realize that they are as aro as anyone else?

Character A feels broken due to being romance repulsed. How do they learn to accept themself?

Character A is a celebrity and constantly asked about their love life in interviews, or subject to rumors about who they may be dating.

Character A feels ashamed because they are alloaro. How do they overcome this shame?

Tropes, the Aromantic Version

Enemies to Friends. Show how passionate nemesis go from hating each other to thinking the other is actually nice to hang out with.

Character A and Character B fake date in order to make someone’s family happy. What they learn from this experience is that dating sucks.

Dystopian soulmate au. Soulmates are actually something engineered by an evil entity or government in order to enforce some form of population control. Time for our aromantic heroes to rise against them.

Character A and Character B are nobles whose family put them through an arranged marriage for political reasons. A and B at first don’t like each other, but they then become friends or QPPs.

Character A and Character B somehow acquire a baby. Time for them to learn how to co-parent.

Character A is hurt. Their friend Character B takes care of them and helps them heal from what happened.

There was only one bed. Guess they’ll cuddle all night long.

There was only one bed. Guess they’ll fuck like rabbits.

The villain of your story uses the Power of Love to fuel their evil spells. Only your loveless hero can save the world.

Omegaverse, but make your pack be platonic.

5+1 Scenarios

Five times Character A thought they were feeling romantic attraction, and one time they realized it was a different type of attraction.

Five times Character A didn’t feel romantic attraction, and one time they did.

Five times Character A tried to ask Character B to be their QPP, and one time they managed to do it.

Five times Character A thought Character B had a crush on them, and one time they found out B had a squish on them.

Five times Character A pretended they weren’t romance repulsed, and one time they told others where they could put their romance.

Five times Character A decided not to act on their sexual attraction, and one time they did.

Five times someone asks how Character A can be happy without a partner, and one time when we see how happy they are.

Five times Character A failed at having a romantic relationship, and one time they realized they didn’t need one after all.

Five times Character A thought everyone else felt the same way they did, and one time they realized that no, they are very aromantic, alloromantics definitely don’t see the world like they do.

Five times Character A picked a crush because everyone else had a crush and they felt they needed one too, and one time they didn’t.

Five times Character A had to explain what aromanticism was, and one when they didn’t need to.

Worldbuilding

In your fictional world, does the word aromantic exist? If not, what language do aromantic people use to describe themselves?

In your fictional world, is there an aromantic community? Is it well established? What is its history?

What are your fictional society’s view on romance?

Does your fictional society allow for committed, non-romantic relationships? If so, what kind?

Imagine a fictional society where amatonormativity doesn’t exist.

Imagine a fictional society where romance as we intend it doesn’t exist.

[lesboygamzee]

can you also do june? :D

sexuality headcanon: greyaro lesbian ^_^ i know a lot of people interpret the whole ' i am not a homosexual ' thing as her being in denial but tee bee h i did not interpret it that way . i think she is very much a girl liker but also arospec because im aro and love making as many characters as possible arospec

gender headcanon: trans woman duh . i think she calls herself a transsexual and says she used to be a man because she just seems the type to phrase it that way and good for her . her egg does not crack for a million years ( 30 )

a ship i have with said character: junevrisrezi supramacy . i feel like a lot of people make it really fluffy but i think they have some fucked up shit going on thats just kind of what happens when youre in proximity to both vriska AND terezi . mental illness ? in MY t4t4t lesbian polycule ? its more likely than you think .

a brotp i have with said character: JUNE AND BOTH BETA STRILONDES . and june and karkat but i junes friendship with both rose and dave is so so so important to me . i love junes conversations with like every character ever but ESPECIALLY in the early acts i love june and roses + june and daves interactions theyre so sillyfun . best buddypals

a notp i have with said character: i .. dont know . i guess the BAD ones . every ship coming to mind is either because its literally awful or because i think june is a lesbian . i guess junerose and juneroxy because i am friends with the lalondes but thats literally it .

a random headcanon: i hc literally every character as autistic but this girl can fit so much fucking autism in her its insane . like grabbing you by the shoulders go and read some june conversations with ' june autism compilation ' in mind and itll fit 90% of the time .

general opinion over said character: juney my absolute beloved . she will be like all of my friends are so weird im glad im the only normal one while being the most passively insane character ever . anyway june is so silly and i am going to name my tinkaton in pokemon sv after her . solid character i am obsessed with her .

[toasterdrake]

Blunt discussion of genitalia and sexual intimacy

lgbtqia+ controversy

(Before people come at me: I'm aroace.)

(I will be using she/her pronouns for Yelena.)

Some aro/acespec people have a problem with Yelena written romantically/sexually. Personally, I don't, but to each their own. If you don't approve of the content, then please just get yourself away from it/ignore it. It's your choice to consume content or not. Pick and choose what you like, support them, ignore what you don't.

I understand that ace/aro representation is important, really, I do, but this fanfiction here isn't invalidation of Yelena's queer identity. This little slice of the internet has the most loving and accepting people I've ever encountered. Worry about all this in canon. Attack the big money-eating corporations doing us dirty, not fan creators just trying to share their love for Yelena.

Even the people trying to police Yelena's queer identity seem to be misinformed, so I want to clarify some things as a member of the ace/arospec community and a fan of Yelena.

MCU Yelena is a different character in a different universe to comics Yelena. They are separate entities

Comics Yelena is the one canon confirmed as ace

MCU Yelena has no canon queer identity (that doesn't mean cishetero is until proven otherwise), but we can infer that she was assigned female at birth.

Neither Yelena has been canon confirmed as aro

Asexuality doesn't come hand-in-hand with aromance

Asexuality is defined as a lack of experiencing sexual attraction.

^ In other words, an ace person doesn't look at a stranger and think 'I want to fuck them'

Aces are still very capable of experiencing aesthetic attraction. (They can think a person is 'hot' without wanting to have sex with them. They're admiring the person's physical beauty without the desire to touch genitals.)

They also have libidos and can get aroused. Being ace doesn't mean someone can't or doesn't have sex.

Sex interest is completely separate to sexual attraction. (-favourable, -indifferent, -repulsed)

Every asexual experiences it differently.

Aromance is defined as a lack of experiencing romantic attraction.

^ In other words, an aro person doesn't look at a stranger and think 'I want to date them'

Aros can still have and want happy, loving, fulfilling romantic relationships. Or not.

Every aromantic experiences it differently.

An ace/aro can be any mishmash of labels under the sun, or simply exist as queer.

Asexuality and aromance are spectrums.

Asexuality and aromance can be umbrella labels for those spectrums.

Please do your own research!! I haven't said everything there is to say, and I don't speak for every ace/arospec person. I'm just one person who wants to clear the air about misconceptions.

If you see fanfiction you feel invalidates a character's identity, then don't read it. If you don't see the content you want, make it. That's fandom's purpose.

Please be polite and respectful of each other. I don't want arguments. Hate isn't necessary and only makes everyone's mood worse. I'm not here to take part in controversy, only to inform.

I know others have decided to stop writing (partially or fully) for Yelena, but I will not.

This is all I will say on this matter.

love,

- bi-rd ☕

[tomatograter]

whats your opinions on jake being portrayed as arospec or acespec and gay? do you think it would make sense if he was acespec or arospec or no? it definitely makes sense that hes gay

Personally (and it's important that this starting disclaimer exists) *I* don't portray Jake as being in the aro/ace spectrum. That's Me. It's not a subject i enjoy debating about because it feels unfocused.

This is for a variety of reasons I consider important, the biggest one being that Jake is a sexual assault survivor — this is not something that has happened to "a" Jake, it is an intrinsic part of his story be it on the beta earth or on the game over timeline or in the alpha earth or in the epilogues; it's a recurrent constant. And he responds to it badly, always.

Jake's ambivalence towards being worthy of a relationship, immediate repulsion to any sort of contact, attempts at self-isolation, and subsequent hypersexuality after being harassed and threatened with sexual assault by jane are... really eerily accurate to my own experiences and survivors i know. When he decides to perform as an adult he overdoes it: he does things he's not exactly proud of and that contribute to a manufactured image the public has of him, but it's not because he's disinterested, it's because he's traumatized. He's trying to prove that he's "gotten better". I identified within the spectrum as a teen, but the label only worked insofar as I had my own points of contention to work through and being in any sort of relationship, for a period of my life, was untenable. It was easier to find a label that would help me not think about it anymore and mark every potential risk down as 'unavailable'.

The average sexual assault victim in media gets one of two treatments. First being the inspiration porn, as in "here to make the protagonist feel less shitty about their life because other people have it worse!", and second being The Tragedy That Dies At The End. The first is often coupled with said character conveniently disappearing after their usefulness to the plot or protagonist is exhausted, a friendly figure walking off alone into the mist with a placid smile, and the second just dies. Neither is considered fit for romance, and the nebulous concept of happy ending seems to exist inside this desexed, saintly, sterilized, and 90% of the time bubblewrapped future where they become a monk or something. As if that's the only way they'll get "fixed" aside from death.

If they had a baby from the assault, sometimes, they get to keep it. Never remarry though!

(There's a minor blessing spared to victims that also happen to be protagonists, in which they get to go on a cinematic revengequest, but I consider that a different subject in how people tend to portray "functional" survivors altogether. The Protagonist with some hidden dark secret is still the Protagonist. The victim is defined by being the victim.)

Conversations about aro/ace Jake tend to frame it as an innate truth he's always been aware of, while also pointedly not touching on the big awkward trauma sitting in the middle of the room. I've read about it and seen how it gets portrayed in other fanworks, but i don't think it works for me. Jake's self-hatred and victim blaming is upped to 110 in the conversation that often gets cited as proof that he's aromantic, but that's in the same log where he says 'maybe hes not worth of anyone's time ever, and maybe he shouldn't inconvenience anyone ever again, and maybe he did something to provoke or deserve all of this, so really everyone would be much happier if he moved into the woods, bleeped off the radar, and never had a chance to ruin their lives again' so idk. It never felt comfortable to me to ignore the context it's in, what it was motivated by, and same with the post-trickster logs, where he's still jealous over dirk after saying Maybe He's Just Broken for not getting what roxy or jane feel when they go to dubious extremes in the name of "love".

"Nonrom sansplat" in on itself is a bit of an awkward punitive joke, like, he's announcing hes not even worthy of having platonic friends. What the hell!

And Jake does want to have friends, and he does want to date somebody, and multiple times throughout the story we see he's romantically interested in dirk in a way that is not reciprocated once the subject of the sentence is switched to jane or aranea or even roxy, but he clearly does feel upset when that is taken away from him, so for me it seems clear enough.

Second reason being, Jake tends to get infantilized pretty hard. Its uncomfortable to see the overlaying composite of people recognizing ND/Autistic traits in him and exclaiming he's unfit for a relationship because "he can't handle it", or is "too dumb for it", while also knowing a lot of his issues stem from trying to make his friends not leave him and have other people recognize him as a full person (or as a grown adult, in the case of the epilogues).

In sum; I think Jake has a complex identity, but to me its core is defined by how he fails to perform masculinity in every traditional sense, the harm that is brought to him because of that (and lets be honest, most of the incidents are framed as "corretive", beta jake's specifically because he fell for a man, etc), how he has to deal with it afterwards, and slowly learn how to heal without further harming himself.