#trying to cope with the feels with this one

[hanniebaeee]

Baby On Board

Chris x fem!reader

Warnings: nothing!

Genre: strangers to possible lovers, flufffffff

Summary: You see a poor (hot) dad struggling with a crying baby in your flight, and step in to help. And sparks fly.

a/n: Short, but I tried. So tired I wanna pass out. Happy weekend everyone 🫶

It was exactly 58 minutes and 35 seconds since the very cute, very angry baby in 23A began crying.  You couldn’t blame the kid - it was a long-haul flight - the adults were barely coping. Still, the loud wails had your head pounding. 

You peeked over the seat, and saw the lone soldier of 23A. OH. 

He looked absolutely exhausted - but yet gorgeous - messy dark hair, slightly sweaty, dark circles under his brown eyes. He bounced the baby in his arms, trying desperately to calm the poor child down, but it was like she had no plans to stop.

Your heart went out to the poor man. He was trying his best. But a couple of passengers muttered complaints loud enough for him to hear. One guy even hit him with a passive-aggressive, "Maybe some people shouldn't fly with babies."

You’d had enough of the rudeness. And, you did something insane. You stood up, and made your way over to 23A.

“Excuse me,” you said, tapping his shoulder.

He turned around, eyes widening when he met yours. Up close, he looked even more gorgeous, even if completely wrecked. His lips parted as if to apologize again.

“Do you want me to hold her for a bit?” you offered gently, glancing at the red-faced, wailing infant. “It looks like you could use a break.”

His jaw dropped slightly as he asked, “Are you serious?” His strong Australian accent hit you square in the gut.

“Completely serious,” you replied, smiling.

He hesitated only for a moment before nodding, looking like he was about to cry out of gratitude. "Thank you. God, thank you."

He handed the baby over carefully, like she was made of glass. The little one, red as a tomato and just as angry, locked eyes with you. You started gently bouncing her, speaking to her in a soft whisper. She gazed at you, her loud wails softening into tiny whimpers and then as if someone flipped a switch, she fell quiet.

Her father watched in absolute surprise (and some exasperation) as she let out a little sigh, snuggled in against your boobs (of course she did), and fell asleep. Just like that.

"What the…?" The man looked at you like you were a literal angel. "Are you some kind of baby whisperer? How did you do that?!"

“Trade secret.” You grinned.

“Seriously, she hasn’t slept in days. I mean, I haven’t slept in days. I don’t even remember what my knees feel like.” He said. 

“Sleep is for the weak.” You nodded sagely, making him laugh. 

“I can't thank you enough for this… I was this close to jumping out of the emergency exit.”

“Oh not dramatic at all,” You teased. 

“Not at all,” He laughed. “I'm Chris, by the way. And she's Mia.”

“Y/N,” You said, rocking the baby in your arms, her warmth spreading into you like the sweetest hug. 

When you were sure that she was asleep, you leaned forward to place her in the bassinet. It took only a second for the baby’s eyes to snap open, and her face scrunched in fury. She let out a blood-curdling scream that made Chris groan and bury his face in his hands.

“Okay,” you said, sitting back down with the baby nestled against your chest. “I guess this is my seat now.”

He shot you a sheepish, but grateful smile. “You don’t have to do this. I feel so bad…”

“Don’t feel bad,” you interrupted, adjusting the baby in your arms as she snuggled in. “Just so you know, you’re doing great.”

“Am I?” he asked with a self-deprecating laugh, running a hand through his messy curls. “Because it sure doesn’t feel like it.”

“You are,” you assured him firmly. “She’s fed, she’s loved, and you’re trying everything. That’s all that matters.”

He exhaled deeply, like your words actually lifted a weight off his chest.

“Thank you,” he said softly.

He laughed again, his whole face lighting up, and suddenly the exhaustion made him look even sexier. How was that even possible? 

You quickly stopped that train of thought. He has a kid. That meant he had a partner. You quickly looked away, feeling a little embarrassed.

Mia whimpered gently in her sleep, and then nuzzled into your soft chest and fell asleep again. Chris sighed, watching his daughter sleep. 

“She’s had colic the past two weeks,” he admitted quietly. “I didn't even know what I was doing wrong.”

“You did nothing wrong, Chris,” You said softly. “These things happen. It's always something or the other with babies. Besides you'd have some support -”

“Her mom’s not in the picture. Left right after she was born.”

You glanced at him, your heart squeezing. “I’m so sorry.”

He shook his head.

“We were never really together, it's the strangest story really. Ahh, it’s been hard. But… Mia’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” 

Your heart did something that had you holding the baby tighter against you. 

“You’re seriously incredible,” he said, his voice low. “I don’t know how to thank you for this.”

“Dinner works,” you said casually, surprising even yourself.

He blinked, then smirked. “Are you always this smooth, or is it just me?”

You shrugged, your lips quirking up. “I think it's Mia. But you'd learn eventually…if at all -”

And judging by the way his eyes lingered on yours, it looked like that’s exactly what he intended to do.

You landed, and you tried to hand over Mia to Chris at the baggage claim. But she had a tiny fistful of your soft pink jumper, and was totally unwilling to let go. So here you were, walking beside Chris towards the exit, Mia still fast asleep in your arms and Chris, carrying your small trolley bag along with his massive duffle bag and a little bag of the baby's things. 

You tried to wrestle it off his hands, but he shot you a tired but warm smile.

“You’re holding my kid. Least I can do is hold a bag.”

It was hard not to feel your heart melt at his words.

As you walked toward the arrivals area, you could see your best friend Minho waiting for you, spinning his car keys around his finger. His handsome face wore a bored expression that immediately turned into bewilderment when he saw you. 

His sharp gaze flicked from the baby in your arms to Chris, carrying three bags like a domestic god, and back to you.

“Oh my god,” Minho said loudly, striding toward you. “Please don’t tell me you’ve had a secret husband and baby hidden away in Australia.”

You burst out laughing, swatting him on the arm. Even Chris chuckled, though he looked just a little awkward.

“Minho, meet Chris,” you said, still grinning. “And this is Mia. Chris, this is Minho, my deranged bestie. And no, Min, she’s not mine, and I am not secretly married.”

Minho narrowed his eyes playfully. “Uh-huh. Sure.”

“Nice to meet you, man. And thanks for not jumping to any conclusions.” Chris adjusted the bags on his shoulder, smirking. 

Minho snorted. “Oh, don't mention it.”

“Can you behave for, like, five minutes?” You said, rolling your eyes. 

“Where’s the fun in that?” Minho quipped before turning his attention to Chris again. “What’s the story here?”

“Mia's been having a rough time on the flight, so I was just helping out.” you supplied quickly, seeing your gremlin of a best friend already starting to look way too invested in this. 

“Helping out, huh?” Minho’s smirk widened. 

Chris’s ears turned a faint shade of pink, and you shot Minho a warning glare. “Don’t start.”

Minho held up his hands in mock innocence. “I didn’t say a word.”

The moment was broken by Mia stirring slightly in your arms. You looked down, your expression softening as you whispered, “Hello there.”

Mia made grabby hands at you, his tiny hands caressing your face.

Chris watched you like you’d hung the stars, his gaze so intense it made your stomach flip. When you looked up and caught him staring, he smiled - a real, genuine smile that made your heart skip a beat.

“Here,” you said, stepping closer and gently handing Mia back to him. But before you let go, you pressed a soft kiss to her tiny hand.

“Bye, sweetie,” you murmured, your voice laced with affection.

Chris held her carefully, his expression unreadable as he looked at you.

“Thank you,” he said softly. “For everything. Really.”

You nodded, smiling. “Text me about dinner?”

He grinned, the tiredness in his face momentarily replaced by something lighter, more playful. “Oh, I will.”

As he walked away, you felt the weight of Minho’s smirk before you even turned to face him.

“Don’t,” you warned.

“Oh, I’m gonna,” he teased. “So. Flirting with a hot single dad? Is this just a new hobby, or should I expect babysitting duties soon?”

“I was helping him, Minho.” You groaned. 

“Right,” he said, dragging out the word dramatically. “And I’m here because I love airports.”

You shoved him lightly, but as you walked toward the parking lot, you couldn’t help the small smile tugging at your lips.

Because, honestly? You couldn’t wait for that call.

Divider: @saradika-graphics

Tags: @moonchild9350 @velvetmoonlght @hwangjoanna @pixie-felix @sailor--sun @chancloud8 @captainchrisstan @hansmic @emilyywhyy @inlovewithstraykids @my-neurodivergent-world @nightmarenyxx @channie4lifeee143127 @lezleeferguson-120 @silly250 @pansexual-and-eating-pancakes @sammhisphere @soona-huh @princesskrystix @thecutiepieme

[velvetvisionsaurora]

Alpha ATEEZ x Assistant Omega Reader

Warnings: omega reader, alpha ateez, scenting, heats, ruts, slow burn, eventual smut, forced command, more to come!

When Y/n accepts a position as assistant to alpha K-pop group ATEEZ, she's prepared with professional skills and scent blockers to hide her omega status. What she's not prepared for is the immediate, inexplicable connection she feels with all eight members—a resonance that defies her careful boundaries.

As Y/n becomes eerily attuned to their needs, her suppressed omega nature begins to emerge: purring for the first time in years, responding to alpha growls, feeling safe in ways she never has before. When a protective incident reveals the depth of the members' attachment to her, Y/n must confront the possibility that what binds them together is something ancient and profound.

<<Previous Next>>

Masterlist Ko-Fi☕️

Chapter 21: Pack Cardio

The moment Yeosang's door closed upstairs, the living room fell into an awkward silence broken only by the sound of Wooyoung dramatically throwing himself back onto the couch.

"Well," he announced to the ceiling, "that escalated quickly."

"Wooyoung," Seonghwa warned from the kitchen doorway, though his own nostrils were flaring slightly as the combined scents of aroused omega and claiming alpha began to drift through the house.

"What? I'm just saying! One minute they're having a nice literary afternoon, the next minute our quiet little Yeosang is going full possessive alpha and dragging our mate upstairs like—"

"Like what?" San asked, appearing from the direction of the stairs looking slightly dazed. His enhanced alpha hearing had clearly picked up more than he bargained for.

"Like a romance novel hero!" Wooyoung finished dramatically. "I'm so proud. Our little bookworm finally grew some claws!"

A muffled sound from upstairs made all four alphas in the living room freeze. Hongjoong, who had been trying to read emails on his phone, closed his eyes and took a deliberately slow breath.

"This is fine," he muttered to himself. "This is completely normal. Mates. In our house. Being... mated."

"Is anyone else finding it very hard to concentrate right now?" Jongho asked quietly, his voice strained as he gripped the arm of his chair.

"The scent," Yunho said from where he'd appeared in the doorway, his eyes slightly unfocused. "It's... intense."

Wooyoung sat up suddenly, sniffing the air with exaggerated movements. "Oh my GOD, you're right. It's like... happiness and jasmine and— satisfied omega."

"Wooyoung!" Seonghwa hissed, though his own control was clearly being tested as he unconsciously moved closer to the stairs.

"I'm just appreciating the experience!" Wooyoung defended. "This is educational! Scientific! I'm learning about pack dynamics!"

Another sound from upstairs—definitely your voice this time—made Mingi appear from the kitchen looking like he'd been punched. "I'm going for a run," he announced abruptly.

"Good idea," Hongjoong said immediately. "Long run. Very long run."

"I'll come with you," San added quickly, already heading for the door.

"Make that four," Yunho called, following them. "Y/n is becoming incredibly valuable to our cardio."

Wooyoung watched four of his packmates flee the house before turning to the remaining alphas with theatrical despair. "Am I the only one with any self-control here? Any emotional maturity? Any—OH HOLY MOLY THAT WAS LOUD."

He promptly buried his face in a couch cushion.

"That's it," Seonghwa announced, his composed facade finally cracking. "I'm going to meditate. Very intensely. With noise-canceling headphones."

"Can I join your meditation session?" Jongho asked hopefully.

"Absolutely not. Find your own coping mechanism."

As Seonghwa stalked toward his room, Jongho looked around the now mostly empty living room before grabbing the TV remote with grim determination.

"Action movies," he muttered to himself. "Very loud action movies. With explosions."

Wooyoung lifted his head from the cushion long enough to give him a thumbs up. "Good strategy. I'm going to lie here and contemplate the cruel irony of being surrounded by my mate's happiness while being unable to participate."

"You could go for a run too," Jongho suggested, turning the volume up considerably.

"And miss this?" Wooyoung gestured wildly toward the ceiling. "The mating habits of bookish alphas in their natural environment!"

"You're insane."

"I'm INVESTED in their relationship success!" Wooyoung declared, then immediately dove back into the cushions as another particularly clear sound drifted down. "But maybe also a little dead inside."

The opening explosions of Jongho's action movie filled the air, providing blessed auditory cover for whatever was happening upstairs. Both remaining alphas settled in for what was clearly going to be a very long evening of aggressive distraction techniques.

"Next time," Wooyoung said conversationally, his voice muffled by the cushion, "I'm investing in better soundproofing. For my mental health."

"Next time," Jongho replied, eyes fixed determinedly on the screen, "we're installing a separate wing for private time."

"With industrial-grade ventilation systems."

"And really, really loud ceiling fans."

Another explosion from the TV masked whatever response they might have heard from upstairs, and both alphas silently agreed that action movies would be their new favorite genre.

*****

Yeosang held you against his chest as the aftershocks faded, his hands gently smoothing over your bare back, breath syncing with yours as your heartbeat slowed. He brushed damp hair from your forehead and pressed a kiss there, lingering.

"Are you alright?" he whispered, voice worry-soft but full of awe, his thumb tracing slow, grounding circles along your spine.

"Mmm. Never better," you murmured, nuzzling into his shoulder, boneless and utterly safe. You could feel the smile against your hair as Yeosang wrapped both arms around you, cocooning you in warmth and careful strength.

He stayed quiet for a long moment, simply holding you close, his scent mingled with yours in the cool darkness. Then, softer still: "You're incredible. You know that, right?"

You managed a sleepy smile. "Only because you see me that way."

He let out a quiet laugh, so affectionate it warmed you from the inside out. "No—because that's exactly what you are. I… I've never felt this close to anyone."

You looked up, caught his gaze, and felt your heart stutter at the vulnerability there. "Me neither. I like… being yours, Yeosang."

His breath caught, the words hitting him somewhere deep. He answered with another gentle kiss, tender and slow, before tucking you back beneath the covers. "Rest, angel. I've got you."

You yawned, drifting as his fingers stroked lazy shapes along your skin. "Stay?"

"Always," he promised. And he did, until your eyelids fluttered shut, your breathing deep and soft, finally lulled to sleep in his arms.

Yeosang lay there a little longer, just listening to your quiet breaths, his hand protectively spanning your waist.

After a while, he slipped from the bed, dressing quietly. He hesitated in the soft light, smiling over your sleeping form—so peaceful, so wholly his. Then, padding softly down the hallway, he made his way to the kitchen, mind still humming with the memory of your touch, your scent, and the words you'd let him claim.

---

The living room was still glowing with the blue light of Jongho's action movie when Yeosang descended the stairs, though the volume had been mercifully lowered. Wooyoung was sprawled across one end of the couch, no longer hiding behind cushions but instead lounging with the satisfied air of someone who had thoroughly enjoyed the evening's entertainment. Jongho sat rigidly upright in his chair, determinedly focused on the screen where explosions continued to light up the night.

Both alphas' heads turned immediately when Yeosang appeared, their enhanced senses picking up the combined scents that clung to him—satisfaction, contentment, and the unmistakable proof of a thoroughly claimed omega.

Wooyoung's face immediately split into the most delighted grin Yeosang had ever seen.

"Well, well, well," Wooyoung practically purred, sitting up with theatrical slowness. "Look who's finally emerged from his literary den of passion."

Yeosang paused halfway to the kitchen, color rising to his cheeks as he realized there was no hiding what had transpired upstairs. "Wooyoung—"

"Oh no, don't 'Wooyoung' me," he interrupted with a dramatic wave of his hand. "I am LIVING for this character development. Quiet, bookish Yeosang discovers his inner alpha and claims his mate with such enthusiasm that half our pack fled the premises in terror."

Jongho made a strangled sound that might have been a laugh or a cry for help, his face turning steadily redder as he kept his eyes glued to the TV screen.

"You should be proud!" Wooyoung continued, hopping up from the couch to follow Yeosang into the kitchen. "I mean, the passion! The intensity! The way you just growled at me and dragged her upstairs like some kind of—"

"Please stop talking," Jongho called from the living room, his voice slightly higher than usual.

"Like some kind of romance novel alpha!" Wooyoung finished triumphantly, completely ignoring Jongho's plea. "I'm getting secondhand satisfaction just from witnessing your happiness. It's beautiful. Inspiring."

Yeosang had reached the refrigerator and was pulling out a bottle of water with hands that were definitely not shaking. "I just came down for water."

"Water," Wooyoung repeated with obvious amusement. "Yes, hydration is very important after such... vigorous literary discussions."

"Oh my god," came Jongho's mortified voice from the other room.

"What? I'm being supportive!" Wooyoung called back before turning his attention back to Yeosang, who was drinking water with the focused concentration of someone trying very hard to ignore the conversation happening around him.

"So," Wooyoung continued conversationally, hopping up to sit on the kitchen counter, "on a scale of one to ten, how completely ruined are you for anyone else? Because honestly, the scent of satisfied omega has been driving us all absolutely feral, and I'm just wondering if we should prepare for more emergency runs in the future."

Yeosang nearly choked on his water. "Wooyoung!"

"I'm asking the important questions! For pack management purposes! Seonghwa would want to know these things for schedule planning!"

Before Yeosang could formulate a response to that particular brand of logic, the front door opened and four very windswept alphas stumbled inside, clearly having run much further and harder than any sane person would on a casual evening jog.

Mingi collapsed against the door frame, Hongjoong on the couch, breathing hard. San bent over with his hands on his knees, while Yunho leaned against the wall looking like he'd just finished a marathon.

"Did we run enough?" Yunho panted. "Please tell me we ran enough."

Wooyoung leaned around the kitchen doorway to survey the returning runners with obvious delight. "Judging by the fact that you all look like you've been fleeing a natural disaster, I'd say you ran the appropriate amount."

"Is it safe?" San asked between breaths. "Are they... done?"

"Our darling Yeosang just came down for water," Wooyoung reported cheerfully. "Looking thoroughly satisfied and glowing with post-coital bliss. So yes, I'd say the immediate crisis has passed."

Hongjoong, who had maintained his composure better than the other three runners, straightened and fixed Wooyoung with a look. "Where's Y/n?"

"Sleeping peacefully upstairs," Yeosang answered quietly, his voice carrying a note of possessive satisfaction that made all the alphas in the room shift uncomfortably. "In my bed."

"Right," Hongjoong said, running a hand through his disheveled hair. "Okay. We need to... we need to figure something out. Because if every individual bonding session is going to affect the pack this intensely, we're all going to lose our minds."

"Agreed," Seonghwa's voice came from the stairs as he descended, looking like he'd just emerged from the most stressful meditation session of his life. "I could hear everything even with noise-canceling headphones."

"See?" Wooyoung said, gesturing broadly. "This is what I mean about the soundproofing. It's a real issue."

"It's not just the sound," Mingi said, finally catching his breath enough to speak properly. "It's the scent. The... energy. It's like the house itself was vibrating with satisfaction."

"Very poetic," Wooyoung observed.

Hongjoong looked around at his pack—exhausted from running, frazzled from failed meditation, and generally looking like they'd all been through some kind of ordeal—and made a decision.

"This can't continue," he said firmly. "We need a better solution than half the pack fleeing the house every time two of us are intimate."

"Actually," Wooyoung said, suddenly sitting up straighter with an expression that suggested he'd just had a revelation, "I have an idea."

"Oh no," Jongho muttered from the living room.

"No, hear me out," Wooyoung continued, hopping down from the counter with renewed energy. "The problem isn't that they're being intimate. The problem is that we're not bonded enough to handle it properly."

"What do you mean?" Seonghwa asked, though his tone suggested he suspected where this was going.

"I mean," Wooyoung said, spreading his arms as if the solution was obvious, "we complete the bond. All of us. Full mating claim."

The silence that followed was deafening.

"Think about it," Wooyoung continued, apparently taking their stunned silence as encouragement. "Right now, we're all partially bonded but not claimed. So when two people are intimate, the rest of us feel left out, possessive, confused. But if we all have an equal claim, if we're all fully mated, then instead of feeling excluded, we'd feel... included. Like their happiness is our happiness."

"That's..." Yunho started, then stopped, clearly working through the logic.

"That's actually not completely insane," Hongjoong finished, sounding surprised.

"See?" Wooyoung beamed. "I have my moments of brilliance. We just need to make it official. Full pack bond, complete mating claim. Then instead of running away when two of us are together, we can all just bask in the collective satisfaction like a proper pack."

"You're suggesting we all mate with her," San said slowly, as if making sure he understood correctly.

"I'm suggesting we formalize what's already happening," Wooyoung corrected. "We're already her mates. The bonds are already there. We just need to make it official so our alphas stop freaking out every time someone else gets lucky."

Yeosang, who had been quietly listening to this entire exchange while leaning against the kitchen counter, finally spoke up. "She'd have to agree to it."

"Well, obviously," Wooyoung said with a dismissive wave. "We're not cavemen. But considering how happy she looked being thoroughly claimed by you tonight, I'm thinking she might be amenable to the idea."

"This is a huge decision," Hongjoong said seriously. "A full pack mating bond is... permanent. Life-changing. We can't just spring it on her because we're having trouble with jealousy."

"True," Wooyoung agreed. "But we also can't keep pretending this is a temporary arrangement. She's not going anywhere, we're not going anywhere, and our alphas are only going to get more possessive as time goes on. Better to deal with it properly now than wait until someone actually loses their mind."

The logic was sound, even if it was coming from Wooyoung in his typical dramatic fashion. Around the room, you could see the others processing the idea, weighing the implications.

"It would solve the territorial issues," Yunho said thoughtfully.

"And the scent confusion," Mingi added.

"Plus," Wooyoung said with a grin, "think of how happy she'd be. Eight alphas all officially, completely devoted to her happiness and satisfaction. What omega wouldn't want that?"

"We'd need to discuss it with her properly," Seonghwa said, his practical mind already working through the logistics. "Make sure she understands what it means, what we're offering."

"And that she wants it," Hongjoong added firmly. "This only works if everyone is completely willing."

"Oh, she wants it," Wooyoung said with complete confidence. "Trust me. I have excellent instincts about these things."

"Your instincts once told you that putting pineapple on pizza was a good idea," Jongho called from the living room.

"That was completely different!" Wooyoung protested. "And pineapple pizza is delicious! Don't change the subject!"

Despite the teasing, the idea was taking root. You could see it in their faces—the possibility of finally formalizing what they all felt, of creating a bond that would make sense of the complex emotions and territorial instincts they'd been struggling with.

"So," Hongjoong said slowly, "we talk to her. All of us. Make sure she understands what we're offering and what it would mean."

"And if she says yes?" San asked.

Hongjoong looked around at his pack—exhausted, confused, but unified in their love for you and their desire to build something lasting together.

"If she says yes," he said finally, "then we give her everything. Complete devotion, full claim, the kind of bond that legends are made of."

"Perfect," Wooyoung said with satisfaction. "Operation Claim Our Omega is officially a go."

"We are not calling it that," Seonghwa said immediately.

"Operation Formalize Our Feelings?"

"No."

"The Great Mating Initiative?"

"Absolutely not."

"Fine," Wooyoung sighed dramatically. "But when this works and we're all blissfully happy and properly bonded, I want full credit for the brilliant idea."

"You'll get credit," Hongjoong assured him with a small smile. "Assuming she says yes."

"She'll say yes," Wooyoung said with complete confidence. "Trust me. I know our omega. She wants this just as much as we do."

Looking around the room at seven alphas who were all nodding in agreement, Yeosang couldn't help but think that Wooyoung might actually be right for once. The bond was already there—they just needed to make it official.

And judging by the way you'd responded to him tonight, the way you'd surrendered so completely to being claimed and cherished, he had a feeling you'd be more than ready to take that final step with all of them.

"Tomorrow," Hongjoong decided. "We talk to her tomorrow."

"Tomorrow," the others agreed, and for the first time all evening, the house felt peaceful again—filled with anticipation rather than frustration, hope rather than confusion.

Tomorrow, they'd offer you everything. And hopefully, you'd say yes.

——

After the pack meeting concluded, Yeosang had quietly made his way back upstairs, his heart full of anticipation for what tomorrow might bring. The house had finally settled into peaceful quiet, the earlier chaos replaced by hopeful planning and shared understanding.

He slipped back into his room to find you exactly as he'd left you—curled up in his bed, breathing softly, looking utterly content in the cocoon of his sheets that now smelled like both of you. The sight made something warm and possessive unfurl in his chest.

Carefully, so as not to wake you, Yeosang undressed and slid back under the covers, immediately pulling you against his chest. You stirred slightly, a soft sound of contentment escaping your lips as you instinctively nestled closer to his warmth.

"Yeosang?" you murmured sleepily, not quite awake but sensing his presence.

"I'm here," he whispered, pressing a gentle kiss to your hair. "Go back to sleep, angel."

You hummed in response, your arm sliding around his waist as you settled back into deep sleep. Yeosang lay there for a long time, just holding you, his mind drifting between memories of the evening and anticipation of the conversation they'd have with you tomorrow. Eventually, lulled by your steady breathing and the rightness of having you in his arms, he drifted off to sleep.

---

You woke slowly, consciousness returning gradually as you became aware of the warm body pressed against your back, the strong arm wrapped securely around your waist, and the familiar scent of bergamot and books that could only belong to Yeosang. A smile tugged at your lips as memories of the previous evening came flooding back—the bookstore, the ride home, the way he'd claimed you so thoroughly that you'd fallen asleep still trembling with satisfaction.

You were just beginning to stretch languidly in his arms when you became aware of another presence in the room. Opening your eyes fully, you found yourself staring directly into Wooyoung's bright, mischievous face. He was lying on his side on top of the covers, his head propped up on his hand, watching you with obvious delight.

The moment your eyes focused on him, his face split into the most ridiculous grin and he gave you a slow, exaggerated eyebrow wiggle that was so absurdly theatrical you couldn't help but burst into giggles.

"Good morning, Tulip," Wooyoung said cheerfully, his voice pitched just loud enough to wake the alpha behind you. "Sleep well? Dream of anything... educational?"

Behind you, Yeosang's arm tightened protectively around your waist as he was pulled from sleep by your laughter and Wooyoung's voice. A low groan rumbled from his chest as he realized what was happening.

"Wooyoung," Yeosang's voice was rough with sleep and exasperation, "what are you doing in my bed?"

"Technically, I'm on top of your bed, not in it," Wooyoung replied with mock seriousness. "Very important distinction. I'm respecting boundaries while also being adorably intrusive."

"How long have you been watching us sleep?" you asked, still giggling at his antics while trying to pull the sheet higher to maintain some modesty.

"Oh, only about ten minutes," Wooyoung said with a dismissive wave. "And I wasn't watching you sleep, I was waiting for you to wake up. Much less creepy."

"It's literally the same thing," Yeosang pointed out, though his tone had shifted from exasperation to fond amusement as your continued giggles made it impossible to stay truly annoyed.

"Semantics," Wooyoung dismissed airily. "The point is, I bring news! Important pack business! Time-sensitive information!"

"What time is it?" Yeosang asked, reaching blindly for his phone on the nightstand.

"Time for a pack meeting!" Wooyoung announced before Yeosang could find his phone. "Everyone's gathering downstairs to discuss very important matters that definitely cannot wait for you two to finish your post-coital cuddle session."

"Post-coital?" you repeated with a laugh, your cheeks flushing at his blunt terminology.

"Very fancy words for someone who couldn't spell 'sophisticated' last week," Yeosang observed dryly.

"Hey! I've been expanding my vocabulary!" Wooyoung protested. "Seonghwa gave me a word-a-day calendar. Very educational. Yesterday's word was 'perspicacious.'"

"Do you know what it means?" you asked with amusement.

"Having keen insight," Wooyoung replied promptly, then grinned. "And perspicaciously speaking, I can tell that you two had a very good time last night based on the way you're both glowing and the fact that your scents are so mixed together I can't tell where one ends and the other begins."

Yeosang made a sound that was half groan, half laugh. "You're impossible."

"Impossibly charming," Wooyoung corrected. "Now come on, pack meeting time! Everyone's waiting!"

"Can't the pack meeting wait until we're dressed?" you asked reasonably.

Wooyoung's grin turned absolutely wicked. "Clothing optional, actually. Very progressive of us, don't you think?"

"Absolutely not," Yeosang said immediately, his arm tightening around you possessively. "You can wait downstairs while we get dressed."

"But I'm comfortable here," Wooyoung whined, making himself more comfortable on the bed. "Besides, after last night's audio-visual experience, I think we're all past the point of being shy around each other."

"Audio-visual experience?" you squeaked, your face turning an even deeper shade of red.

"Oh yes," Wooyoung said with obvious delight. "The whole house got a very thorough education in the mating habits of of you two. Very informative. Jongho nearly had a heart attack."

"Oh my god," you groaned, burying your face in your hands.

"Don't be embarrassed!" Wooyoung said quickly, his tone shifting to something more genuinely reassuring. "It was beautiful! Inspiring! The scent of happy omega had us all practically floating on clouds of secondhand satisfaction!"

"That's not helping," Yeosang pointed out, though he was rubbing soothing circles on your back.

"I'm being supportive about your romantic success!"

"You're being a menace," Yeosang corrected, but his tone was fond. "Now get out so we can get dressed for this pack meeting."

"Fine, fine," Wooyoung sighed dramatically, rolling off the bed with exaggerated reluctance. "But first..."

Before either you or Yeosang could react, Wooyoung was leaning over you, his hand gently cupping your face as he pressed his lips to yours. What started as what you expected to be a playful peck transformed into something deeper, more intense. His mouth moved against yours with surprising tenderness, passionate yet reverent, as if he was pouring all of his affection for you into the contact.

Your head spun from the sudden shift, the unexpected intimacy making your heart race and your omega purr with delight. Without conscious thought, your hand reached up to fist in his shirt, trying to pull him closer, your omega instincts suddenly demanding more contact, more connection with this alpha who was kissing you like you were something precious.

"Wooyoung," you breathed against his lips, your voice carrying a note of need that made both alphas in the room go very still.

Wooyoung pulled back slowly, his eyes dark with desire but also filled with such tender affection it made your chest tight. "Good morning, beautiful," he whispered, his thumb stroking across your cheek before he straightened up.

Behind you, Yeosang's arm had tightened possessively around your waist, though his expression showed more understanding than jealousy as he watched the exchange.

"Now that," Wooyoung said with a satisfied grin, though his voice was slightly rougher than usual, "was a proper good morning. Much better than my eyebrow wiggle, don't you think?"

You could only stare at him, still slightly dazed from the kiss and the way your omega had responded so immediately to his touch.

"You're definitely a menace," Yeosang said, but there was warmth in his voice as he pressed a gentle kiss to your shoulder, grounding you.

"But I'm your menace," Wooyoung replied cheerfully, heading for the door. "Now seriously, get dressed. Important pack business waits for no one, not even thoroughly satisfied mates who've just been properly kissed."

He paused at the threshold to look back with a grin that was somehow both mischievous and genuinely happy.

"For what it's worth," he said, his voice losing some of its theatrical edge, "you two look really happy together. It's nice seeing our quiet alpha finally getting properly appreciated."

The genuine warmth in his words made your heart flutter, and you saw Yeosang's expression soften considerably.

"Thank you, Wooyoung," you said sincerely.

"Don't mention it. Now seriously, get dressed. Hongjoong's already on his second cup of coffee, which means he's reached maximum leader patience levels."

With that warning, Wooyoung disappeared down the hallway, his cheerful humming fading as he made his way back downstairs.

"He's absolutely insane," Yeosang said with a mixture of exasperation and affection.

"But he's our insane," you replied, turning in his arms to face him properly. "And he's right—we should probably get downstairs before Hongjoong reaches his limit."

"Probably," Yeosang agreed, though he made no move to let you go. Instead, he leaned down to press a soft kiss to your lips. "Good morning, by the way."

"Good morning," you replied with a smile that was pure contentment. "Last night was..."

"Perfect," he finished for you, his own smile soft and satisfied. "Absolutely perfect."

"Now come on," you said, reluctantly pulling away from his warmth. "Let's go see what this mysterious pack meeting is about."

As you both began the process of finding clothes and making yourselves presentable, you couldn't help but wonder what could be so important that it required an immediate pack meeting. But judging by Wooyoung's excitement and the way he'd talked about "important pack business," you had a feeling it was going to be something significant.

"Ready?" Yeosang asked, holding out his hand once you were both dressed.

"Ready," you confirmed, taking his hand and letting him lead you toward whatever awaited you downstairs.

Though judging by the butterflies in your stomach and the anticipation in Yeosang's eyes, you suspected your life was about to change in a very big way.

Next>>

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[gf2bellamy]

not to break your heart and make you sad but how do you think dad spencer wouldve coped in prison away from his kid(s)

girldad!spencer strikes again.

spencer would not cope well in prison. at all.

his mind would be consumed by thoughts of his daughter. the idea of missing out on her life, of leaving you to raise her alone, would eat at him constantly.

he’d feel physically ill, every time he remembered he wasn’t there to tuck her in at night.

when you visited, you’d bring him drawings she made for him. he’d try so hard to keep it together, but the second you handed them to him, his breath would hitch. he’d hang them up in his cell, but every time he looked at them, his eyes would burn.

they were his only comfort, yet they also reminded him of everything he was missing.

you’d never bring her to see him in prison, and he’d never ask you to. the thought of her seeing him behind glass, in a jumpsuit, surrounded by guards, it would destroy him.

he’d rather she remember him as the man, the one who carried her on his shoulders and read her stories, not like this.

at home, she’d ask about him. "where’s daddy?" 

you’d kneel down, brushing her hair back, forcing a smile. "he’s just working, honey. he’ll be back soon."

sometimes, you’d buy her a new toy or book and say it was from him, just so she wouldn’t forget how much he loved her.

he’d write her letters, pages and pages of them. filled with bedtime stories, silly jokes, and promises of all the things they’d do when he got home. when you read them to her, she’d giggle, hugging the paper like it was him. and when you visited spencer, you’d recount every detail, how her face lit up and how happy she was.

the worst moments were the quiet ones.

lying on his bunk, staring at the ceiling, wondering if she was crying, if she was scared, if she even remembered his voice. he’d press his hands over his face, shoulders shaking, because the guilt was suffocating.

he keeps track of her age down to the hour. he knows exactly how old she is at any given moment.

“4 years, 7 months, and 6 days,” he’ll murmur to himself like a mantra, over and over.

he re-reads her letters and drawings until the pages are worn. he knows every scribble, every crooked heart by memory. sometimes he traces the lines with his fingertip, pretending her tiny hand is in his.

he dreams about her constantly. sometimes it’s her running into his arms in the backyard. sometimes it’s a nightmare, her calling out for him and he can’t reach her.

he tries to teach her through his letters. little lessons disguised as stories: "did you know butterflies taste with their feet?"

he wants her to always feel like he’s still guiding her, even from far away.

he imagines your life at home constantly. he pictures you making her breakfast, tying her shoes, buying her new dresses. he imagines you brushing her hair the way he used to, and he can’t decide if it makes him feel better or worse.

he feels crushing guilt. even though it wasn’t his fault. even though you tell him every visit: “you did nothing wrong.”

he still blames himself. for leaving you to do everything alone. for leaving his daugher to grow up without a dad. even if it was just for 3 months.

you’re his anchor. your voice. your smile during visits. the way you tell him stories, “she made a new friend at school.” the way you never stop believing in him. he’d fall apart completely without you.

he can’t let go of the image of her the day before he was taken away. whatever she was wearing, whatever she said. he plays that day over and over. he didn’t know it would be the last time he tucked her in for who knows how long. if he had, he would’ve held her longer.

he swears he’ll make it up to both of you one day. he doesn’t know how, or when, but in his mind, he builds a future where you’re together again.

[tucsonhorse]

I am autistic and I find that being precise is very important to me. With some people I will find myself doing things like sharing more detail about something someone is talking about or letting them know about a common misconception or similar and they seem to get really annoyed about it. And like I try to be nice about it and only correct the big things, but some people get mad if I say anything.

I don't think you're being a contrarian like your sibling, I've dealt with people like that before and it's annoying and in my experience most people avoid them, not to mention lots more people complain about it. I think these specific people are saying you're always picking a fight because they see anything other than complete agreement/acceptance of what they're saying as an argument. That's a common thing with people who are more authoritarian types, especially if they are dealing with someone that they think they do or should have authority over.

When it comes to talking a lot I see two possible reasons. First is anxiety. Autistics, especially late diagnosed autistics, are often misunderstood. So we develop a coping mechanism of trying to explain every nuance of what we mean and cover every possible misconception in order to avoid being misunderstood. This means we tend to go on at length (much like my reply here...), even more so if we're anxious or dealing with someone who has previously criticised or misunderstood us.

My second thought is if you're talking about a special interest. From the context it doesn't sound like that's what's happening in the situations you're talking about, especially since you don't want to be talking.

I can't tell you why your sibling is like this. I can tell you that my mom's whole family is like that and they all seem to enjoy "discussing" things with one another. I don't understand it and most of the rest of us hate when they do it, but my mom and certain of her siblings (and her father when he was alive) could argue for hours and clear out a whole house as the rest of us ran away from it.

To stop talking a lot if it's from anxiety takes practice. You start by trying to recognize when you're doing it, which can be tough. Once you're recognizing it you can work on stopping yourself when you notice it happening and work on becoming comfortable with the idea of being misunderstood so that you don't feel the urge to explain so in depth.

As for telling the difference between a conversation and an argument, that's a lot harder in my experience. Some of it is recognizing tone of voice and if the person's voice is getting tight/tense then I assume that they think I'm arguing (this requires being able to perceive tone of voice). If that happens I will stop adding information or disagreeing with them at all and usually try to exit the conversation as soon as I can. If I still want/need to add information I'll try starting with phrases like "I totally agree, and also..." to make it explicit that I am agreeing with them rather than arguing. And with people who seem to always think I'm arguing I will basically stop sharing any information with them. When I feel the urge to correct them or add context I'll ask myself if their lack of knowledge/incorrect knowledge is or is likely to cause genuine harm to themself or others and if the answer is no then I just don't say anything.

Question that I suspect is autism related

I have, on more than one occasion over multiple decades, been told that I “need to have the last word” and that I “have a response for everything”.

Additionally and in a similar vein, I’ve been told that “everything is an argument with you” and I “always have to say something”.

When I was a little kid I was bad at conversations. People said stuff I had no opinion on or didn’t need follow-up and so I wouldn’t answer and they’d get bored. And eventually through trial and error I figured out that if someone said something to me, all I had to do was say something related back, and the interaction could go on as long as it needed to.

But then as a teen- and now as an adult- a number of people (mostly people I’ve found to be very delicate and particular about things in a sort of need-to-be-in-control authoritarian way) have expressed the identical observation about how I naturally try to converse, and I’m not sure what to do about it.

And the thing is, I have a sibling that talks like this too. We bicker all the time. He changes his own opinions seemingly at a whim for the purpose of being contrary, and it’s impossible to make a statement or observation out loud without him contradicting it, and even when he is demonstrably, factually wrong about something, he will dig his heels into the dirt and defend his stance to the grave.

And like. I hear myself responding, or adding on to people’s comments, but I don’t hear the ‘arguing’ they describe, or the contrarian habits of my sibling. Even when I’m paying attention and being bery careful not to follow up too much or speak too often or disagree or correct something that isn’t important, I get called out for “picking a fight”. They say something, I answer, they reply, I continue, then seemingly out of nowhere they snap. I think everything’s fine until suddenly it isn’t.

And so I guess my question is, how can you tell if you’re a contrary sort of person? How can you tell when to respond or follow up on a person’s statement and how do you know when to leave it in silence? Does everybody see me this way, and is it only people who are already short-tempered who are willing to say it?

I honestly don’t really have that much to say, and half the time I don’t even really want to talk at all, but I’ve been told countless times that I “just seem to like the sound of your own voice” and have to just be “tuned out after a while”. So if it isn’t necessary and I don’t even want to, why am I doing it?

Is there a reason I’m like this? Why is my sibling like this? How do I stop talking when there’s nothing to say, and how can I tell the difference between a conversation and an argument before the other person visibly snaps?

I’m a full grown adult

[oonalovesastarionssimpleplan]

Astarion – and the image we expect to see when we think of a victim.

No, this isn’t meant to be a plea for you to stop hating Astarion.

This isn’t a "But look what he had to go through! Go give him the world”.

This is meant to show how different victims of violence can be – and how arbitrary it often is when we choose to feel compassion, and when we don’t.

Let’s take the same trauma, the same environment – but two different personalities experiencing it.

there will be two different pictures of a person

Victims are different. Just as different as all of us are.

Astarion’s life changed in an instant. One moment, he was a magistrate walking home. The next, he was a vampire locked in a cell. Hunger. Violence. Prostitution.

Constant surveillance, judgment, punishment. Torture. Rape. Watching others suffer the same.

Love and compassion – forbidden. No one to help. No way out.

Two hundred years.

If you try to imagine that, try to picture yourself in that situation – it’s unimaginable.

And injustice like that exists in the real world too. Children. Women. Men.

So why do some people feel no sympathy for Astarion?

Because he’s mean – and that means he deserves it

Because he doesn’t act like a victim?

– not like the victim we imagine in our heads.

And this happens in real life too.

⚠️ Trigger warning: SA and child abduction

Those who know the case of Natascha Kampusch – a girl abducted and kept in a man’s basement for eight years, who escaped – may also know that she was demonized in the Press.

And why? Because just days after her escape, she gave an interview – and she didn’t cry.

She didn’t look broken, fragile, or psychologically shattered. On the contrary: she sat upright, calm.

This isn't how we imagine a victim. In our minds, the conclusion could be, 'they couldn't have found it that bad.' maybe it is a bad person themself

But here’s what we need to understand:

People react differently to trauma and danger. Fight or flight. That’s instinct.

We develop different coping mechanisms – also instinctively. In moments of extreme stress, our subconscious kicks in to protect us.

Sometimes it makes us feel nothing. Sometimes it makes us even laugh.

It tell us, it's not that bad. We adapt, try to align ourselves with the abuser to survive.

This even happens in hostage situations (Stockholm Syndrome).

Astarion survived 200 years of unspeakable evil.

His coping mechanisms are incredibly strong.

But our idea of a “real” victim is someone who cries, rocks back and forth, and needs comforting.

Real victims, however, often had to learn to be so strong that no one – no one – sees how vulnerable they really are.

Which only means they endured far more than any human mind should ever have to.

And i think we don’t have to see him as a victim. Or what a victim should be Like.

We can see him as a fighter – one who finally, after all this time, is allowed to lay down his weapons.

[u1timat3-m0gg3r]

---

🔫 Romantic Relationship Headcanons: Leon S. Kennedy (My thoughts on what he'd be like in a relationship. Takes place between RE4 and RE6.)

---

🐺 1. Loyal to a Fault

Leon doesn’t give his heart away easily, but when he does, he gives it completely. His sense of duty and personal loyalty bleed into his relationships. If you become someone he trusts, he'll move heaven and earth to protect you—even at the cost of himself.

He struggles to put his own needs first.

Expect self-sacrifice packaged as stoicism.

---

🧃 2. Emotionally Guarded, But Not Cold

Years of trauma have hardened Leon, but underneath the sarcastic comments and tired eyes is someone who still wants connection—he just doesn’t know how to have it without losing someone else.

He's emotionally withdrawn at times, often needing space.

He won’t talk about his worst nights, but he’ll lie awake next to you, grateful he’s not alone.

---

💔 3. Haunted by the Past

Leon is heavily affected by the things he’s seen and done. Raccoon City, failed missions, and people he couldn’t save all linger in his psyche.

He may pull away unexpectedly—not because he doesn’t care, but because he doesn’t want to drag you into his darkness.

A simple “Are you okay?” might get a “Yeah,” but your presence means more than he lets on.

---

🎮 4. Dry Humor as a Coping Mechanism

His sarcasm isn’t just for show—it’s a wall. A survival tool. He’ll crack jokes in the middle of horror, and that includes using humor to hide his own emotional wounds.

In private, though, his jokes are softer. More personal. He loves making you laugh, especially if he’s had a bad day.

He’ll sometimes tease you in that deadpan tone, but it’s laced with affection.

---

🦴 5. Protective, But Respects Your Strength

Leon will absolutely throw himself in front of danger for you, but he also respects capability. He’s attracted to strong-willed partners who can stand on their own.

He’s protective without being possessive.

If you’re combat-trained or independent, he won’t get in your way—he’ll fight back-to-back with you.

---

🧥 6. Quiet Affection

Leon’s love language is acts of service. He doesn’t always know how to say the right thing, but he shows up:

Fixing things for you without asking.

Bringing you coffee after a mission.

Staying up all night to watch over you if you’re injured.

He’s the kind of man who will hand you his jacket without a word, even if he’s freezing.

---

☁️ 7. Late-Night Vulnerability

He’ll open up only when it’s dark, when you’re both in bed and the world is quiet. That’s when you’ll hear pieces of the real Leon:

His regrets.

His hopes that he barely believes in.

The “what-ifs” that plague him.

You’re the only one who gets to see this side.

---

🪦 8. He’s Afraid You’ll Leave—or Die

After everything he’s lost, Leon constantly fears that loving someone is just setting himself up for more pain. So even if he loves you deeply, he may hesitate to let himself feel it.

He may try to push you away when things get too real.

If you’re patient, consistent, and strong enough to stay, he’ll eventually stop running.

---

[patheticpoems]

STOP STRESSING

you're getting wrinkles

some of you are stress addicts. you'll spend more time stressing about manifestation than you do actually committing to your desires. Aren't you sick of it? You've been nonstop overthinking, you're having doubts and even though you try to correct them they just won't won't away?

Well, I'm gonna tell you how to shut out all that stress; How to make it go away.

IDENTIFYING STRESS

Let's start here. Yes, you may already know what stress is but I didn't ask, I'm covering it regardless! Stress is that feeling you may get when your circumstances are clamping in on you, whether it be due to difficult treatment, responsibilities, time crunches, or perceiving the opposite occurring to you, it can cause you to start worrying, "am I doing this right?", "why isn't it working?" You wonder and you anxiously correct it because ack! God forbid you have a bad thought! You can't waver even though you only assume it's a thing because some blogger was sharing their own personal opinion!!!

I listed some causes for stress and maybe yours are different, however, what is important for us to do now is to identify where it stems from.

TREATING YOUR STRESS

METHOD I.

Knowing the cause of our stress means we can deal with the solution head-on. So, let us begin. Whenever you start stressing, I want you to STAR! Stop, Think, Act, Reaffirm! You will pause, ask yourself why do you think/feel the way you do? From one question ask another, keep digging deeper.

"I feel nervous > why? > because I don't know if things will work out > why wouldn't they? > because what if it just doesn't work for me specifically?"

And then, act accordingly! "

"> why wouldn't it work for me specifically if its a law? > maybe I'm exempt- > its a universal law, I can't be. I'm just stressing because I'm scared, there isn't any logic to it!"

Reaffirm that what you think doesn't hold power over you and doesn't hold any water. Remind yourself who you are.

"I'm the sole operant power and there is no such thing as not working because I already have it!"

Once you start getting used to treating your stress that way it helps you see the doubts you have as less serious.

METHOD II.

Now, another way to deal with stress is always remembering to think in despite (of). When you're having trouble with hard circumstances that you just can't ignore and are too overwhelming, this is a way to not let them get you down - a way to remind yourself you aren't tied to these circumstances and this life.

"Despite what I see in my circumstances, I'm still all powerful!"

"Despite how I overthink, everything stems from self!"

It helps to remind yourself that regardless of what you see it doesn't change that you're in power. Remember, everything is a reflection of you, it stems from you, there is no separation.

I'd like to say, it is also good to take a look at ways to cope with anxiety/stress, whether that be a specific activity that calms you down, music, or breathing exercises. It is always important to regulate your own emotions for YOUR well-being. Life is about fulfilling the egos desires and we need to be alright enough to do that!

Stress can be a difficult thing to handle that's why we need to remind ourselves that we have nothing to stress over, that by the end of the day it is our perception. I know that may not be appealing to some people or very difficult to do, but that's why you have to start somewhere to get comfortable with it.

[nipuni]

WE FINISHED THE GAME!!! MASTERPIECE BRILLIANT TOUCHING STUDY IN GRIEF COMFORTING POIGNANT REFRESHING NO NOTES ALL I WAS HOPING FOR AND MORE we both loved it so much what a gem of a game!!

I'm going to put all my thoughts under a cut for spoilers, don't read unless you have finished the game, please play it blind!!

This game is so consistently good all the way through and even with such a huge shift in perspective in the middle it manages to stay on theme and deliver the message it sets off to tell from the start in such a clean way. It could have been jarring but it stays cohesive because of this and suddenly so much about the world building makes sense.

It also makes it so easy for you to understand and respect every character's choices and where they are coming from, all their different ways of coping with tragedy sets them on their roles within the canvas but at their core there is just their love for each other. Everyone is so loving!! there is so much love in this story!! Every character is allowed to be vulnerable and tender and stubborn in such a childish way. You can see them all go through the stages of grief and it feels like a coming of age story, there is a playful innocence to everyone that is never punished and felt so refreshing, and you are immersed in it in Verso's world and you see so much of this through the eyes of a young girl.

I also love how they made love look messy and difficult but stronger than anything. From the start with Gustave and Sophie loving each other but also divided over this dilema mirroring Aline and Renoir. They could have gone the easy route of an idyllic relationship but they chose to show this conflict and it adds so much more weight and depth to it.

There is also this recurring theme about the value of creating something doomed, it's in the children of Lumière and the Canvas worlds, in art and relationships and attachment, it comes up over and over and it shows you every possible answer and rationalization I love that!! All these impossible questions and no right answers just people doing their best with the time they are given and being so brave.

The story started with such a devastating emotional gut punch, it took them under 10 minutes to make me sob. It sets the tone immediately and it is so quiet about it. The start of Gustave's arc was one of my favorite parts of the game, he doesn't say a word but you can follow his emotional state perfectly, you feel it, it's so real.

Act I is such an epic story in itself, the final act of resistance and all the shapes it can take "For those who come after" "We continue" it's all so human. And how you go from this grief on an existential and societal scale to this very personal family tragedy at the center, and this grieving father trying to save his loved ones from despair and from repeating the same patterns and hurting each other with their pain because he get's it, they are all so similar. He wants to make the hard choices so they don't have to and he is willing to suffer the consequences, It's so touching 😭

The acting is fantastic, the EYES, there is so much happening in the eye movements!! The voice acting and writing of the dialogue is impeccable too, I especially loved how they sometimes talk over each other. The humor is also great and unexpected.

This story felt very comforting, the views on art and family and life feel like a hug after a good cry, like acceptance. The music is INCREDIBLE I can't stop listening to the OST!!! the visuals have this beautiful dreamlike quality and the SCALE of it all feels thrilling. I have to go back and play NG+ because I think I missed a ton of stuff in my rush to know how the story ends and I want the full experience now which is a compliment too.

The worldbuilding is fascinating and new and has so much potential for further installments but at the same time the game is very self contained and complete which is rare nowadays, it felt very intentional and focused. So I'm satisfied but also would grab any other game they make in a heartbeat (Give me Clea's story give me Clea!!).

Anyway I talked a lot, we loved it, it's good!!

We are finally playing Clair Obscur 👩‍🎨 I've already cried my eyes out five times, the acting is excellent, the themes immaculate, great writing, aesthetically gorgeous. It feels tailor made to our taste, there is so much to dig into, there is so much meaning to everything

[vasito-de-leche]

Ooh I just found your account on here! I love the way you write!

I just thought of this idea, and this can be with the reader with them as a group or single interactions, doesn't matter to me! ^^

What would the Suja Bois and Huntr/x do if they found out that the reader was a demon? Like they were cursed to be one, sold their soul etc.

Thank you <3

;KPOP DEMON HUNTERS SAJA BOYS - Finding Out You're A Demon

Compilation of headcanons and analysis about how the Saja Boys would react if they found out you're a demon.

welcome to my little blog!! ty for the kind words, I'm glad you like my writing <3

since the max number of characters I take for prompts is 5, I went with the saja boys cause I might have some ideas for oneshots involving huntrix for this prompt hehehoho

JINU

We basically see the way he'd react to this in the movie itself, but that was a very specific situation that required him to get close enough to Rumi to gain her trust.

I think this would still apply if you turned out to be someone more influential or powerful than him in the human world; he'd follow the exact same steps to befriend you, until he could start pulling at your strings without you noticing.

If we're talking about a coworker or acquaintance, someone that Jinu only knows superficially, then I can see him being much colder--you're someone he can exploit by simply knowing you're a demon in hiding, he makes this known from the very beginning so that you know your place. With how pragmatic he is, he's the least bothered by things like morality and such. If you're an obstacle, then he won't hesitate to subtly threaten you to stay out of his way, maybe even using his own status of working directly with Gwi-ma.

If you're someone close to him, however, then his reaction would be that of sadness and camaraderie--you're stuck in the same boat as him, you're aware of the consequences and the eternal doom and gloom that follows you just by existing. It sucks, but you can actually relate to him. Jinu would not throw you any words of pity or coddle you, of course, but he does soften when the two of you are alone. Not enough to be noticeable to outsiders, just little things that you can pick up--stepping in front of you whenever your patterns begin to show due to distress, a comforting hand on your shoulder if your negative emotions start spiraling out of control.

Overall, I like the idea that Jinu doesn't truly know how to verbalize nor show his concern and/or affection because of the centuries he's spent as a demon himself--he's internalized the fact that he can't feel anything but misery, but when presented with this situation, he does choose to try, as awkward or stiff as he may come across.

I also like the idea that he unconsciously does this as a way to make up for the way he betrayed his family. He didn't get to protect his sister, nor make his mother happy, so this is the next best thing.

When it comes to discussing your status as a demon, Jinu wouldn't pry into how you came to be like this. Or rather, he doesn't want to know. It would only add to the heartbreak he's already trying to forget so desperately. He doesn't want to discuss how to stop being a demon, how to get better, how to cope with it and anything of the sort; isn't it enough that he accepts you for who you are? The lowest type of creature, stuck at the very bottom, exactly like him? Why try to change what you are? You did this to yourself, after all.

There is a huge contrast between Jinu's actions and his words that could easily become the catalyst for constant fights between the two of you; he's gentle and understanding when he tries to keep the world from seeing you for the demon you are, but his words are so very cruel, denying any ounce of hope that you may have. And he doesn't do this on purpose, I insist--he genuinely thinks this is the best course of action for hopeless demons like you two.

ROMANCE

Regardless of your relationship with Romance, he's the most bothered about this discovery.

With his themes of, well, romance and love and what have you, I like to portray him as someone who is extremely contradicting, someone who adds a very specific flavor of drama by being so emotional and/or attuned to other people's feelings, while romanticizing the world around him, seeing it through rose-colored glasses for fun. This is how he entertains himself.

Romance, similar to most Saja Boys, thinks it's near impossible to escape Gwi-ma's influence on him; yet that romantic and dreamy side of him still holds on to the hope that maybe, just maybe, it's possible. And if it isn't, then he can at least get the satisfaction of pretending that it can happen, or that he can live as a human once again. That's part of why he joined Jinu; the chance to return to the human world as one of them, rather than a demon.

So finding out that you--someone that's been lingering around in his life whether as a coworker or as someone close to him--are actually a fucking demon? Well, it shatters the perfect illusion he's built for himself. I can see him looking at you with shock and anger, as if he had any right to look down on you when you're just like him, before begging you to prove him wrong--that you misspoke or that he misheard. Romance goes through all stages of grief in the span of a week.

I think another big factor of his reaction lies in the fear that comes with the possibility that you might have known he's a demon. That someone saw right through him without his knowledge, without him choosing to reveal himself. Or the idea that he somehow missed the signs of your own demonic heritage. As much as Romance might care for you, this is still something that terrifies him to know end.

It would take a lot for your relationship to return to something stable, until he cools down and understands that it might've been just as terrifying for you to reveal yourself.

Romance is much more understanding than Jinu when it comes to existing as a demon, or the story about how you became one--he would like to know how it happened, if only to lessen the burden on your shoulders and maybe, just maybe, share his own story as well so he can bitch about all the things that went wrong.

He also entertains the idea of finding a way to be free from Gwi-ma with you, even if deep down he doesn't truly believe in it, it's fun to talk with you about all the things you'd like to do in the future. All the places he wants to visit from his life as a human to see how they've changed in the years he's been gone, and all the new things you'd like to show him. I can see Romance also teaching you a few tricks on how to pass off better as a human, like making sure to cover up the marks with make-up in case any nosy hunters that might see them show up.

ABBY

Abby's reaction depends on how you feel about your demonic heritage; if you dislike this side of yourself, then he acts a bit more solemn, attempting to cheer you up, and if you do happen to like being a demon, then he jokes around and cheers with you.

All in all, this information doesn't change a lot for him but he knows better than to pull a Mystery and give you absolutely no feedback and no reaction. It does come as a surprise and it explains many, many different things but overall? Well, you're a demon, how's that been going for you?

While Abby is not immune to Gwi-ma and Jinu's influence throughout the years, I like to think that his straightforward nature keeps him from conflating or mixing up his feelings and projecting them on you--not to say he's good at compartmentalizing his own set of emotional baggage, but he at least understands that whatever he may feel about being a demon is not something that instantly applies to you or someone else. Whether you're close or just an acquaintance, he adapts to what he believes is the best approach for your situation.

And after that is done, he would instantly focus on figuring out all the differences between the two of you, especially if you're a different type of demon and not grim reapers like the Saja Boys--from patting you on the back because damn, eternal damnation must suck to asking if you could transform so he can see, the change is almost jarring. He offers to transform too if you're curious as well, flirting here and there in a way that makes this reveal feel almost trivial, like there was nothing to worry about in the first place.

I like to think that Abby is just very good at disarming people in his own way, he does this every day already by being the eye-candy of the group, and this is one of those moments; it might seem like he trivializes how being a demon may affect you, but the genuine curiosity he has and the casualness of it all can be endearing (this casualness is, of course, completely gone once you show the same amount of interest in him).

Don't expect him to be more protective of you or anything on the spot--you've managed to live with your human disguise for this long, Abby doesn't see the point in stepping in when you're already so capable at taking care of yourself. He can, but only if you ask him yourself as some sort of favour, he doesn't mind at all.

You'll just have to live with him being funny or flirty about it. You need to cover your patterns? Well, good thing it's cold and you can wear his jacket, it smells just like him and it looks great on you. Wink.

MYSTERY

Mystery is a tricky one, because chances are that he's already figured out you're a demon very early on, so it's not exactly a surprise.

His reaction to this information is also very underwhelming, since it's not exactly his business to pry into your life or what you might be doing; if you're just an acquaintance, he literally couldn't care less. You do you. And if you're someone close to him, then he's not going to say a single thing about it either, that's for you to bring up whenever you feel like. And even then, he would just give you a smile and a thumbs up. Easy peasy.

Of course, he's still a demon himself, one that is driven a lot by his instincts (ie: the feral barking, like, hello?) so while he knows it's best to wait until you come to him with this part of yourself, he might just end up slipping.

I like to portray Mystery as someone who prefers being a demon over a human, no matter the caveats and disadvantages that come with an indentured existence to Gwi-ma, so if you're the type to struggle to keep your humanity despite being a demon, that might rub him the wrong way. Because that means you disapprove of your demonic heritage, that you disapprove of him by extension. Whenever you say something about changing, about fitting in--anything he can relate to the way you're hiding in the human world--there's a chance Mystery might just snap with an off-handed comment, carelessly tossed your way in reproach. Something that very clearly states he knows you're like him.

Mystery's reaction to finding out you're a demon is so very underwhelming because he accepts this part of you so easily, you're a demon like him and he likes sharing something so meaningful to him with you. The games of repression and the emotional baggage that people like Rumi or Romance play don't interest him in the slightest. He's also a bit similar to Jinu in the way that he doesn't care about how you became a demon--or rather, he doesn't need to know, especially if you're trying to justify yourself in any way. He'll definitely listen if it's something you desperately want to tell him, but it won't change the way he feels about you.

I can see Mystery slowly helping you come around with accepting your demon heritage, not quite hyping you up but clearly approving when you let go from time to time--he loves your claws, your odd skin demonic tone, and he especially adores seeing your real eyes glow whenever you get worked up over something. That's what he considers the real you.

100% enables you to be a little more fiercer, to take advantage of your current situation. What's the point of being doomed for all eternity if you can't have fun with it from time to time?

BABY

Right off the bat, if you're not the one to tell him you're a demon and he has to find out due to a third party? He'd be pissed. Absolutely fucking pissed that you didn't tell him yourself, especially if you're someone he holds close to his heart. Two months of the silent treatment at minimum.

What's the point of all the special privileges he gives you as his equal if you won't tell him something like this? Something that actually matters? You're supposed to be his bestie, his second in command, the one person he actually respects. Nevermind the fact that Baby wouldn't reciprocate in this aspect; he expects you to tell him, but wouldn't tell you he's a demon if that ever put the band in trouble.

But if you do tell him, then Baby would be ecstatic--while he's not fully accepting of being a demon due to how stressful it can be sometimes, how much he hates not getting his way when confronted with Gwi-ma and all, he's similar to Mystery in the sense that he likes matching with you.

Instantly demands to see your patterns, to see how much yours match his, basically hopping in circles around you, full of giddy energy. Baby also carries a similar energy to Abby in this aspect, being more playful than downright depressing like Jinu, but in a way that is definitely more careless and focused on how this reveal makes him feel, rather than how it might affect you.

If this bothers you in any way, it's up to you to reel him in and sit him down to properly talk. And trust me, he hates that you're raining on his parade but a few jokes and half-hearted threats here and there to snitch on him whenever he skips a rehearsal will get Baby to sit down.

I like to think that there's a game of push and pull with Baby in which you constantly have to reel him in from his usual bratty shenanigans, but it's not like you're actually babysitting him, a grown ass demon--everyone knows that if Baby doesn't feel like doing something, he simply won't. The fact that he listens and heeds to your words is already earth-shattering for his band mates, absolute proof that you're very special for him, even if he treats the story of how you became a demon like casual coffee talk gossip.

Oh and don't expect him to cover up for you--there is a part of Baby that resents having to hide what he is, so if you're ever at the verge of being revealed to the world, you can bet it's because of one of his elaborate pranks. "Don't you want to know what would happen if everyone knew?" This is the only time he wouldn't mind revealing himself.

[ihatethecrowdsyouknowthat]

taking advantage - s reid x fem!reader

reader gets over her breakup by getting under her very worried coworker - pt 2 of legally single

genre: smut wc: 2k warnings: convincing to have sex, emotionally fragile reader, coping with sex, spencer can't say no, handjob, f receiving oral, unprotected piv, reader on birth control

His Converse step through the barrier and into your apartment. Your empty apartment. The way he looks at you almost like an apology crumbles his stoic exterior. If only he could just throw away that boy next door personality and be a guy. You wish he would just take advantage of your vulnerability and give you another reason to hate yourself.

Only, it’s Spencer. He’s too good for that.

He whispers your name softly like, if he startled you, you’d fragment. It’s not like you’re a child. You know what you want.

“Why did you want me here?” Spencer asks.

You take a few steps closer and look up at him. “I don’t know.”

All he does is nod before sighing the start of a goodbye, “I think I should go.”

He turns to leave like a father would if your life was a movie. It makes you scramble for any excuse to get him to stay for even one second more. The only syllables that your mind seems to be able to conjure up are pathetic and worthy of venomous laughter.

“Please stay!”

You can hear the laugh track.

With his hand reached out towards the doorknob, he stops. Frozen in time, the only sound is the pitter patter of your fragile heart. “Please?”

He turns to search your features—your smudged mascara, sparkly lips, and glass eyes. And he caves.

“Okay,” he whispers.

The silence coerces you cruelly to speak.

“We broke up.”

“Oh. I’m sorry.” His eyes are sympathetic but somehow hurtful.

The way you look down at your heels compels him to take a step forward. “You know he doesn’t deserve you, right?”

“What?” you look up. You don’t think you’ve ever been this close to each other.

“You’re one of the best people I know.”

“I am?”

Vulnerability shines through your gaze and he can see it. He reminds himself to tread carefully.

“You are,” he nods sincerely.

Your head lifts until your nose brushes his. Spencer’s eyes widen. He tells himself that this isn’t okay, that he’s taking advantage of you and he should be at home.

You mutter softly, “so are you.”

When people compliment you, you say, “thank you.”

But what you don’t do is let them kiss you after. And you definitely don’t kiss back. But he does.

But it’s wrong, he knows. You’re hurt, heartbroken, he can’t be toying with your tarnished heart like it’s nothing.

His lips part before his body catches up to his thoughts. In a quick motion, you’re without his touch again. Even though it’s for the best, it sucks.

“What are you doing?” Spencer sighs.

“I just really—”

“I should go. I don’t want to make any more mistakes.”

You scoff. “Mistakes?” 

“You’re not in a good state.” His hand raises as if to make a point. “I’m not going to take advantage of that!”

Without another thought, you cry, “you’re not taking advantage if I want it!”

It clicks within a second that you actually might want to do more than just kiss him tonight.

So he asks cautiously, “what does that mean?”

Like any other stressful situation, you try to run. “Nothing.” But the squeak in your voice proves the sentiment false.

“Why did you invite me up?” he asks, firm almost like he could command you with the same tone. 

“I don’t know!”

The words hang in the air between your bodies, heavy with what’s left unsaid.

And that’s when you can feel the stone wall crumble to the ground with all of his reservations. Spencer’s eyes, swallowed whole by his pupils, soften into an understanding pity. You make your move again but he doesn’t stop it. He leans into it. Your lips meet hungrily, your hands tangling in unruly curls. One backward step at a time pulls him closer to your bedroom. Determined fingers push his jacket to the floor. The door of your room is clicked shut by his back when you urge him against it. 

It’s only now that his hands finally find your face. He leans down to twist your tongues together. He kisses you like he’s desperate or starving. Something you never had with your ex. When he kissed you it was for only the reason that he should. With Spencer it’s because he wants to. He wants to feel the vibration of your whimpers against his swollen lips. Which confuses you, your brain muddling into a mess of questions about your coworker. 

For example, has he always wanted this?

What if every time your eyes met across the round table, he was thinking about this? What if the whole time he was imagining swallowing your tongue into his mouth? What if he was picturing kissing you in a way that would screw you up for the remainder of your life?

What if his fantasies went further than that?

His large hand squeezes your waist firmly, pushing every what-if out of the way to make room for what’s about to happen. Because everyone knows you can’t move forward if you keep looking back.

You loosen his tie and pull it over his head. “Are you sure?” Spencer asks. Something about him makes everything he says come out like a whisper from the Gods—pure, with all-good intentions and completely genuine. You know your words should be the same way but, for right now, you just know you want him. What you’ll think tomorrow doesn’t matter.

And so an answer doesn’t come. At least, not an answer in words. Your response comes in the form of another kiss. This time a softer one.

It goes against everything he stood for at the opening of the night—what he believed before he stepped into your apartment. The argument is irrefutable, however. The moment he saw that look in your eyes, he couldn't say no. It was the shine in them and the redness under them.

It was the way you begged him with only a look.

How could he ever imagine giving you anything but exactly what you want?

Your hands run down the fabric of his shirt. One button at a time, you undress him down to his boxers. You decide he’s taking too long to return the favour, so you do it yourself, letting your dress fall to the floor.

Spencer stands in front of you in nothing but underwear and you look up at him in the same. You pull him close, tugging him to the bed with you. He lands on top.

Manicured nails softly scratch down his stomach. He visibly twitches in response. You push his boxers down just enough to bare him.

Not that you ever doubted, but his size does surprise you. Spencer’s an above average length. While his girth is nothing to tell the pope about, you’re impressed.

You look up at him with a bitten bottom lip and wrap your hand around the base. His eyes flutter shut as he lets out a whimper. When you smile with amusement, he shuts you up with a kiss. You swipe your thumb across the tip of his cock to pull a moan from him. Except he ruins your fun with his big hand covering yours.

“You have to stop if you want me to…” he nods downward.

You just agree. It’s hard to argue. Especially when he starts kissing down your neck.

Then chest.

Then stomach.

Until he’s right at where your underwear starts.

His head lifts so his big brown eyes can find your clouded ones. “Can I take these off?”

“Yeah,” you mutter breathily.

The fabric is carefully slid down your legs before his lips start moving up them. He gently lays pecks to your inner thighs, each one higher than the last. Heavy sighs tell him that he can continue upward. He presses a soft kiss to your clit and gauges your reaction.

He takes your parted lips as a sign that he’s doing something right.

He starts by licking from the bottom to the top and then taking your clit into his mouth. Waves of pleasure shoot straight through you. You realize now that you haven’t had an orgasm in a while.

It’s very obvious in how, from just a little suction from his lips, you already feel close to that ledge.

“Spencer, I’m gon—” you moan.

Instead of stopping or panicking and changing rhythm, he slides a finger into you. His mouth continues on your clit in the same way. His finger matches the pace while you squirm.

You throw your head back against the bed with a whimper. Your mouth hangs open, your chest rising with each attempt of a breath. The throbbing between your legs gets worse until it turns into pure ecstasy spreading from your pussy to your stomach.

It hits you almost without warning. Spencer doesn’t seem surprised or stop when he notices you’re done. Rather, he works you through it. His actions soften but persist. He doesn’t stop until he sees he’s made you sensitive to touch.

Your body buzzes. Spencer starts back up your body sloppily. He finds your parted lips with his own and slides his tongue in effortlessly. That’s when the sensitivity subsides—or maybe you just can’t take it anymore—so you reach for his boxers and pull them down the rest of the way.

Spencer freezes to whisper, “I don’t have contraceptives.”

“I’m on birth control,” you say with too much enthusiasm.

“Are you sure? Birth control is really only 91% effective without pulling out.”

The most Spencer thing ever. 

“I’m sure, Spence. Please?”

You look up at him and, once again, he can only seem to imagine one possible answer to your question. “Yes, ma’am.”

Maybe you should feel bad for how every decision made tonight has been because you convinced him to make the decision. Something should be stopping you. Maybe your breakup or your current state of denial.

But all you can think about is getting your coworker inside you.

He settles himself right at your entrance. A silent exchange between the two of you occurs. It goes like this:

Spencer says, “tell me you won’t regret this.”

You reply, “how could I? It’s you.”

But what gets left out is it’s him. You’re going to regret this.

He stretches you out, inch by inch. Your walls accommodate him in whole, nothing like the other guys you’ve been with. Again, you find he’s big.

The last inch hits your cervix and sends a moan tumbling from your lips. He controls the muscles of his mouth to not smile.

He was never an egotistical man. Sure, he took pride in his knowledge but after so many times of being told “I’m sorry I asked,” he stopped taking so much. Something that did feel good, though, was knowing that he could please you. Especially in ways that he’s sure your ex couldn’t.

So when he feels you clench around him, it starts to worry him how much he’s holding back. But with one word, he gives in.

“More.”

His hips snap forward to set a pace that will lead you both to what you’re craving. And then whatever comes after.

The sound of skin and heavy breaths melts your brain to a puddle of goo. The tip of his cock bumps your cervix in a steady rhythm. A rhythm that makes your eyes roll back and your thighs shake. His pants hit the side of your neck along with low grunts and whines. You think how vocal he is is what pushes you over the edge.

Your stomach tenses as your orgasm runs through you. Tiny contractions flutter the walls of your cunt. You feel him throb before he very quickly pulls himself out of you. With your legs wrapped around his waist, he finishes where he can. White hot drips down your naval.

In only a few seconds, the fog lifts. You look down at your naked body intertwined with your coworker’s. This happens to people a lot, you’re sure. The only logical response comes to you.

The only logical response that won’t lead to a meeting with HR.

“This didn’t happen.”

Everything in him says to fight you, that you could be something good. You could be what he sees in his mind when someone says love.

But, when you say something, he agrees.

“Okay.”

[bunnwich]

Nothing New.♟️ (Leona Breakup Fic)

They didn't want him. He shouldn't be surprised, but it didn't mean it didn't hurt.

Characters: Leona Kingscholar x Yuu!Reader (GN. No physical description for Yuu. They/Them pronouns. "Queen" is used once in a GN way.)

Words: 1600

CW: ANGST, Depressive Thoughts, Unhealthy Coping, Alcoholism, Mentions of Past Intimacy, PG-13ish

Note: This is a bit random, but I was particularly proud of this piece I wrote for my Leona x Yuu series, and I have several questions in my inbox about Leona's perspective on things like relationships, and I feel this really exemplifies how he feels about love and intimacy in general.

--

No one had ever kissed him quite like they did. 

His first was a lifetime ago, long before they even came into his life. It was his sister-in-law: a stupid peck when he was ten. He wanted to know what he always read about felt like, and she obliged him. The first person he’d ever had a crush on. It was a kind thing, out of pity. She would never have feelings for him in that way and despite her brilliance, she always thought the sun shined out his brother’s ass somehow.

As he grew, these types of shallow entanglements came easily enough. Though unlike in books, reality painted a much duller picture of intimacy and infatuation. He was disliked and even feared, but he was easy on the eyes...and an eligible prince to boot. So affection from any gender wasn’t hard to achieve. Turns out, there were quite a few who were easy to oblige a curious prince's advances.

It satiated something inside him for a while, until he grew too smart for the whole damn thing. Movies and books weren’t real after all, and Leona could sense the hesitation in their compliance with him. He began to ask too many questions: was it because he was a prince, someone with more power than those whom he invited to his bed? 

And then there was the temperament of those few who dared try. Too soft, too hard. Afraid to displease him or…not thinking of him at all. Just there to say they were with someone royal, to get off on the idea of fucking someone above their station.

Was it so damn pathetic to want to be kissed without the burden of his class or magical prowess? Without fear, or some spiteful domination to conquer his unpleasant natures?  No ulterior motives.

Wishes. Kisses. Pipe Dreams. Childish things he dumped in the trash along with his favorite stuffed toys as these mindless thrills stopped feeling as good. It dawned on him that status would always play a factor in any relationships he had, friend or more. And if not that, his magic, wealth...the baggage of his family. The circumstances of his birth would always rear its nasty head.

The life he was gifted with.

He fooled himself that, being in an obligation as his brother was, that over-sweet playing of house bullshit…brought bile to his mouth. He couldn't let himself admit that, despite all the song and dance, no matter what, those two would be together forever, side by side from throne to tomb. Never having to suffer the fate of being an inconsequential piece as he was. Always alone in a room, while a party roared on beyond a closed door…numbing the pain with a bottle of wine. 

After a while, he found himself settling into a more self-righteous stance on the matter. Even if he did marry, it would most likely be a farce. He was already tired of the social games in the palace, why would he want his marriage to be one too? Just some creature to warm the bed so he didn’t have to wake up alone? Stupid. He’d just avoid it altogether.

Though…just because he knew fairytale endings weren't real, the illogical ache inside him for it didn’t seem to get the memo. 

Leona lay his head back against the end of his mattress, legs splayed on the floor of his empty bedroom. He took another swig from one of the two bottles he had snatched from a fresh serving tray. A rushing servant, heading downstairs to the celebration. The sweet liquor burned his tongue, but he didn't mind, he knew the more he drank, the less he would begin to feel.

All these stupid thoughts swelled in his head, passing faster than he could keep track of. The warmth of the alcohol did warm his chest, but did little to take the edge off the raw edge in his guts.

He had to give it to them. They proved the cynical side of him so right in fact, that he couldn't even enjoy the self-pitying stupor he longed to be in right now.

Logically, there was nothing left to feel or say about it all. He accepted their brutal rejection of him. It was his fault for getting so attached. Stupid.

Another wave eroding the sandy shore of his insides…more and more it seemed these days. And this wasn’t just on them, oh no, he’d been a cynic and a depressed piece of shit long before this.

Maybe it was the wine, but he kept seeing a wheel, spinning behind his heavy eyelids. A never-ending wheel where he was crushed underneath it each time, listening to a party go on happily without his presence. Left alone to eat the rotten, sour grapes.

Every. Time.

Not a “bad enough” life to deserve real pity. 

“You’re a prince, you should be grateful, be happy for what you have.” 

Leona chuckled, the buzz of conversation burning his ears through one of the cracks of his bedroom windows.

If only…he could eat those “helpful” words people so often preached to him. Maybe they would fill the gaping hole inside of him. But here he was again, hungry and listless. 

He wondered if anyone knew of his real “curse.” besides the horrifying magic he was born with of course.  What he really was cursed with was the uncanny ability to recount every stupid little thing in his life. Pointless memories. Scraps, left over from the joyous moment of others' victories.

But, they were more than that. He thought once anyway.

The way he was inebriated by their movements, the way they touched him…so familiar. They were tough, bratty, and strong-spirited, all those things he admired. It stirred up superstitious things in his head, things he hadn’t thought about in years. Things he read in books as a kid. They even kissed him. Though not as a prince. 

Just Leona. 

Regardless of how big of a crowd he had, and how many brilliant trinkets he was gifted, they'll all pale in comparison to his chosen audience of one, who had seen the grimy parts and laughed at his threats afterward.

How did that person, with no ties to this world, feel more real than those he’d grown up his whole life with? Those who feared him or wished to fuck him because of his looks or social standing. Maybe it was cause everyone always had their hands out to him—wanting something—or waiting for him to fuck something up. There was sanctuary in the fact that they saw him as he was; just…some fool who was madly twitterpated with them.

Their dismissive view of his rougher edges was fresh at first, a challenge, then…an addiction. And he could see it in the ferocious eyes of his new little playmate. Oh fuck, and they liked him too. Despite it all, they stood beside him each time, even against his own damn family.

Was he really better than a crusty-eyed kitten desperately begging for a teat to suck on, yowling to be picked up? He thought he had been obvious about his feelings, maybe too obvious. But it leaked from him, every pore of his skin. What was the point in hiding? He had foolishly revealed himself, letting himself become the prey.

C'mon, pick up the stray lion in the garden, play with him so he can feel somethin’. Anythin'. And kiss 'em again, just...one more time until his face ached from smiling, his belly sore from laughing so hard

Maybe that was all it ever was, they made him feel something. Something was better than nothin’ after all.

Something bout’ the two of them though. Their playtime was pure. The intimacy was easy, but their hands left char marks on him. He thought that they saw him for what he was. Those cinnamon sugar moments always left his brain blissfully silent, when just the two of them like that. 

It wasn’t perfect, but it was real. Leona panted, eyes burning as he brought the bottle to his lips again, the glass clinking against his fangs.

What was worse? The fact that it was real, or that it was all in his head?

Didn’t matter now.

He was a disciplined guy before he met them. A disciplined cynic, happily unhappy to rot away for the rest of his life in his brother's shadow. Help who he could…and die. Dramatic, yeah…but for all those who accused him of the opposite, Leona Kingscholar did have feelings.

Too many. So many, it was hard to breathe some days.

He never expected himself out of all people to descend into this particular pit of delusion, one that he thought he was immune to. Their own little garden to frolic and play in. 

But, it was never even a game to them. He was never a king on their board. They probably wouldn't think of him even half as long as he would remember of them.

If anything, he was a pawn to them. Even when he made it to the other side of the board, looking back to see if his queen was still waiting for him, but...they hadn't even cared enough to come to battle. 

How could he have been so wrong in his calculations? Still, he couldn't unseat them from that throne in his mind.

Leona's stomach was already turning on him; he hadn’t eaten much, but as long as the feelings in his chest were still wriggling, he would keep on drinking. And drowning.

Nothing new.

[umishiqu]

this is a lot so tiny warning in advance but i have a few things;

@ the person in the reblog tags saying that “now Jamil isn’t allowed to have curry” (skip to second paragraph to see my reply to og post), no, kalim literally gets Jamil curry chefs to learn from for his birthday, and Kalim literally goes to a cooking prep just for spice-based dishes (which would include curry). he never explains specifically why Jamil getting a coma through curry = curry is banned, we just assume the only reason is bcuz he is traumatized. it may have something to do with the fact that the spices in the curry make it that much harder for Kalim to figure out if there’s poison or not and that was one mistake he doesn’t plan on making again. and he learnt poison detection at all specifically so jamil didn’t need to taste test for him. projecting ideas onto them that canon already disproved (“kalim banned it and Jamil can’t eat it anymore!!1!”) is part of the problem and why people even emphasize kalim’s trauma at all, to at least get people to start looking at the character truly instead of an idea of them in their heads. i am brown and grew up in a poor family so if you wanna play race olympics too then let’s do this 💪 genuinely i just enjoy kalim more bcuz although both jamil and kalim are dishonest & hypocrites, one of them doesn’t then make it someone else’s (many someones) problem to “truly understand them” despite the dishonesty. kalim gets mad at jamil bcuz jamil isn’t getting what he wants for himself and resorting to smth that made him overblot in book 4, and its how you know kalim is a genuinely selfless person. as someone who’s been in jamil’s position one of these is more tolerable to me esp since the guy doesn’t mind sharing his wealth, and the other is a lot more privileged being in that position than i ever was and still wants more (jamil character song lyrics drop). (emphasizing this, kalim doesn’t correct any of his siblings when they call him nii-sama, but jamil gets to use only kalim’s name)

back to the actual post. i think people brush over the fact that kalim learnt how to detect poisons himself without Jamil needing to taste test for poison all the time. which is why, again, people are saying to pay attention to the fact that it’s Kalim who is the target of being poisoned and not Jamil. talking about jamil’s lack of understanding isn’t about his lack of sympathy (although this is something that makes me feel less sympathetic, not of his situation but in general, bcuz you do reap what you sow). it’s his lack of understanding of Kalim’s skills (ie saying in book 5 that there’s no way Kalim would be able to detect a magic curse used as poison for a murder attempt … until that’s exactly what he does with vil) (and it’s bcuz he pays attention to people that he was able to do this) (also in kalim’s lab cost where jamil says he couldn’t possibly make the meals in a day) (until… bcuz ruggie had kalim’s help that’s exactly what happened) (and before you say “but Jamil vocalized this!” jamil vocalizes a lot of things that are or aren’t true and kalim has the patience of a saint to not have punched him over the dorm leader thing in book 4 when Kalim had asked him about it all the way in the beginning of the year in his ceremony robes. he even gets upset with Jamil bcuz Jamil keeps calling him stupid and still expects him to sort all the mixed messages of what Jamil rly wants) (despite this kalim genuinely wants to try to figure it out with the real jamil, the one who isn’t honest - hard path to good results is the Scarabia way)

like yeah jamil doesn’t have sympathy for Kalim, this is a fact; he along with Kalim’s dad are the two people who basically told Kalim to suck it up bcuz it’s his fate. he doesn’t cope with it in the way Jamil wants him to, but people confuse kindness for carelessness, which is Jamil’s problem bcuz Kalim’s kindness protects + helps Kalim, and kalim was told to just cope when it came to his (emphasizing on his) fate and has taken precautions himself to make sure he isn’t poisoned. and there is a difference between his kindness and carelessness - like Kalim yelling at Vil over trying to poison Neige in the moment (and Jamil still finds a way to make it about Kalim being careless which Kalim almost yells at him for too, but just thanks him afterwards for saving them) or Kalim yelling at Jade for saying OB group could possibly be dead. and with the way the Asim family raised kalim (to be isolated - he couldn’t even go to middle school even though Jamil was able to attend), it’s also why i don’t think jamil is supposed to be taste testing Kalim’s food

i think a lot of people misconstrue what was actually enforced on Jamil in terms of his servitude to kalim vs what we think. in Jade’s Halloween story the adults yell at a younger Jamil for cooking bcuz “children aren’t supposed to cook with fire”. there’s a really weird emphasis on safety there when everything else suggests that they didn’t care about jamil. eventually, he did take on this task, but when and how wasn’t specified. it makes sense, since his backstory mainly shows his parents telling Jamil to be second to Kalim in everything, but nothing else - not even from the Asim family. we never question why jamil didn’t have trauma from being poisoned by curry or why smth like this wasn’t a part of his woes in his backstory. i think it’s fair to assume that he just didn’t regret choosing to do it, like how he’ll never regret choosing to protect kalim (and says that Azul mischaracterized Jamil in book 7 bcuz Kalim made the contract with Azul, which Jamil wouldn’t have let happen). not to deny it shaped his identity and what lengths Jamil himself will go to to get things done, but again his problems with kalim were about him having to be second to Kalim in everything bcuz of jamil’s parents, and Kalim’s seeming lack of care for it (it’s implied in book 4 jamil backstory that Jamil was expecting Kalim to notice but kept on getting blindsided by him and dropped his expectations) (doesn’t help that he normally sees Kalim as useless and unskilled) (in the same vein, it also doesn’t help that Jamil simultaneously wants to show his skill and vocalizes getting less work at the same time) (bcuz kalim was always trying to look for ways to help jamil even before book 4 but again - mixed messages. does he want to be voluntold to show his skills or does he want to rely on someone to help him? does he want both at the same time? does he want it with people other than kalim? lots of kalim’s interactions with jamil involved kalim trying to answer these questions but it goes under the radar. when kalim isn’t hypnotized in book 4 he’s still trying.)

he does hate Kalim’s lack of care for their situation, but like alab nariya moment where kalim stalking Jamil doesn’t register to Jamil as “this is a problem because this is a crime” but “this is a problem because Kalim used his power to be able to do it” (and cater is the one who takes a double take at this and mentions the priority), it has everything to do with Kalim’s exercise of privilege and not what it means to Jamil. (which is also why, despite knowing Kalim was raised to be forgiving and to have a “suck it up” attitude when it comes to people who harm him, and Jamil actively complains about it) (even tho he was one of two people who encouraged it haha…) (Jamil still believed he and his family would get thrown out if he did the slightest thing wrong against Kalim) (and this in itself is also bcuz Jamil didn’t understand why the adults wanted to curry Kalim’s favour so badly bcuz he’s useless af. there is no other option in his mind except that there would be a horrible punishment awaiting if they don’t) (“who would want to be your friend voluntarily??” -> this question gets answered later). there is def the question of why jamil’s priorities are like this but ill leave that for others to talk abt.

also kalim also went into a coma! i… i can’t believe i have to say this… tunnel vision is real. (see 4-7) the book does also touch on the curry incident, but its vague on whether these two happened at the same. it does help that kalim says “it was only found in my food”. he really wanted to emphasize jamil’s suffering and ignore his own, so he was vague - like usual - but eng version does clear this up that they both went comatose bcuz its harder for Kalim to be vaguer about it) (and kalim prioritizing other people and debasing himself and his feelings for other people, despite what they do to him, including forgiving them, is what Azul says Jamil most likely finds annoying) (but kalim will also do this to support jamil) (and hey book 7 also expanded on this to emphasize that Kalim forgiving people is a choice and not something he always wants to do) (like ofc he has privilege but he can’t change that? it’s not like money = evil and kind of money but not rly = good. how he chooses to use it is what matters. if you want him to learn to punish people over what they do to him bcuz it’ll make Jamil’s life easier, then jamil would not have gotten the same outcome when it comes to consequences as in game) (and he still would have been pushed to do a book 4 anyway, even if kalim was more punishing! bcuz the problem isn’t Jamil taste testing for kalim but again his parents telling him to come second to him in everything) (which now I’m wondering if people actually want kalim to do it, not bcuz it makes sense to kalim’s character, but to affirm jamil’s perspective… interesting meta conversation that just annoys me bcuz it’s also why people like talking abt kalim not knowing how to do anything and then leave him at that instead of seeing his development and the earnestness that the game explicitly talks about multiple times that motivates him to improve) anyway, like Kalim tells Jamil, he didn’t do anything else to Jamil after book 4 bcuz he likes interesting people and the variety of people at NRC.

anyway to end off. they both can be unreliable narrators but it just so happens that kalim (used to be) an unreliable narrator in the “i will affirm and support everything Jamil does” direction, while Jamil is… the exact same with kalim except his gets dismantled explicitly by the narrative multiple times, even before book 4, because ultimately it is jamil’s story. does perspective=truth? not rly esp when Jamil contradicts himself… a lot lmao. still wrapping my head around him complaining about how forgiving kalim is and somehow not registering that applying to Jamil coming first sometimes too (that’s bcuz the only people giving him consequences for it are jamil’s parents and he thought they were an extension of the actual rules) (Futaba did call Jamil a clumsy person…)

so i really hope people actually read all of this + go to the stories to confirm for themselves instead of seeing one word they don’t like and creating a problem from it bcuz yes. the vignettes + events outside of book 4 does explain some of their situation well and doesn’t leave things that ambiguous…

thinking abt jamil and kalim today. i don't like when ppl say kalim's life isn't really that great in a way jamil doesn't see and if only jamil could understand that then he wouldn't be so resentful of kalim's privilege. like my opinion is that No that's exactly Why jamil's resentful actually. jamil Sees the ways that kalim's life sucks. but he just does not have a lot of sympathy for kalim because he goes through those situations with kalim, and he sees the difference that comes with the level of privilege kalim wields. and to him that makes those struggles kind of laughable in comparison to his own.

like yeah kalim has had attempts on his life and still sits and eats at the same table as people who try to poison him . and nobody is denying that having people you know trying to assassinate you isn't traumatic. but also like canonically who do you think is most at risk of consuming that poison. Kalim??? or his POISON TESTER. jamils eating at that exact same table And he sure as fuck is not forgiving that assassin the same way kalim is able to because He has to make sure kalim's stupid forgiving nature doesn't open up the perfect avenue for this guy to try murder Again. kalim has the privilege to forgive this guy and be gracious JAMIL DOES NOT!!!!

another great example is the reason behind why kalim doesn't like to eat curry. poisoned curry sent jamil into a coma and kalim got distressed about it. Obviously this is traumatic for kalim . but you know . Who else . It would affect...... THE GUY IN THE FUCKING COMA....? kalim has the privilege to say "I never want to eat curry again because it sent Jamil into a coma" and it's just Done because he's the boss. jamil Does Not have the privilege to say "I don't want to poison test kalim's food again because it sent Me into a coma" because he has to serve kalim. and it doesn't matter what jamils personal feelings are on curry even though he was the one who GOT POISONED BY IT. do you get it now. is it clicking

[yuma-mukami-garden-god]

Welcome back!!

Pardon the angst but how would the diaboys + Karlheinz & Richter react to a fledgling S/O that refused to drink blood because she wants to hold onto the final shreds of her humanity

Shu Sakamaki

He watches you with tired eyes, seeming indifferent… but you can feel his gaze linger every time you wince from the hunger. “You’re stubborn,” he mutters, reclining lazily on the couch. “But starving yourself won’t make you human again.” Shu knows what it’s like to be caught between apathy and desperation. He won’t force you… at first. But when your strength begins to fail, he’ll press a warm wrist to your lips with a sigh. “Just take it. I won’t judge you for surviving.”

Reiji Sakamaki

He’s furious. At you. At the situation. At how helpless you make yourself. “Foolish girl—do you truly believe clinging to weakness will preserve your soul?” But beneath the lectures and clinical detachment is a strange protectiveness. He understands the agony of watching yourself become something you swore you’d never be. And when you collapse from hunger, trembling, eyes wide with regret, he’ll cradle you like glass and whisper, “You are not lost yet… but I won’t let you destroy yourself in the name of sentiment.”

Ayato Sakamaki

“Tch. What, you think you're better than us now? Too pure to drink blood?” He teases you, taunts you, but there’s a nervous energy behind his voice. Ayato doesn’t understand why it hurts to see you deny your nature. It reminds him too much of rejection. When you finally falter, he’ll pretend it’s a game—his blood, your prize. But when you cry against his neck after drinking, sobbing about feeling like a monster, he goes quiet. “…You’re still you, Chichinashi. You’re still mine.”

Kanato Sakamaki

“You don’t want to drink blood?” His voice rises in a pitch of disbelief and rage. “Then you’ll just die and leave me, like all the others!” To Kanato, your refusal is abandonment. He doesn’t understand restraint—only possession. He’ll scream, cry, plead, and punish you in fits of volatility. But if he sees the torment in your eyes, the pain of losing yourself… he’ll soften, just for a moment. “Fine. Starve. But don’t expect me to be kind when you beg me later.”

Laito Sakamaki

He laughs at first, mockingly gentle. “How romantic~ A tragic little fledgling who won’t drink. How very you.” But it eats at him. Because he’s seen what denial does. And watching you suffer in silence—bruised by your own ideals—stirs something uncomfortable inside him. He’ll try to tempt you, coax you, make you want it. “You’re still human where it counts, Bitch-chan. That won’t disappear just because you give in. I didn’t become a monster by drinking blood… I became one by being alone.”

Subaru Sakamaki

“You’re… just gonna pretend you’re not a vampire now?!” He lashes out, punching walls, storming out, unable to cope with the fear building in his chest. Subaru knows what it’s like to hate himself for what he is. He doesn’t want you to fall into that pit too. He’ll beg you not to be like him—won’t let you suffer the way he has. “You think you’re better than me if you starve yourself? No… You’re hurting. And I… I don’t want to watch you die.”

Ruki Mukami

“You misunderstand your position.” Ruki is calm, cold even, but his words cut like glass. “Humanity is not a virtue. It is a limitation.” He’ll view your refusal as dangerous idealism—something that must be corrected. But the quiet panic in your eyes, the shivering desperation, it pulls at something long buried. “Livestock or not, you are… precious. If this is your rebellion, I will allow it—for now. But I will not let you destroy what little you’ve built trying to chase ghosts.”

Kou Mukami

“Babe, seriously? You’re already halfway there. Might as well enjoy the perks!” Kou tries to laugh it off, tries to make it playful. But he’s scared. He knows what fame tastes like, and what desperation smells like. And your pain? It terrifies him. “Hey… don’t do this to yourself. You're not giving anything up—you’re just… changing.” If you break down, shaking and ashamed, he’ll wrap his arms around you tightly. “You’re still my sunshine, okay? Even if your teeth are a little sharper now.”

Yuma Mukami

Yuma’s not gentle about it. “Tch… you think the world cares if you stay human? It’ll chew you up either way.” He knows how cruel survival is. And he doesn’t want to lose you to some moral high ground that won’t keep you alive. He might drag you to the mirror, show you how sick you look, how close to breaking. But if you cry, he softens, hands hovering. “If you need blood… take mine. I ain't scared of you. I just… don’t wanna lose you.”

Azusa Mukami

“…You’re hurting yourself… again.” Azusa doesn’t judge. He understands pain more intimately than anyone. He sits beside you silently, offering his wrist, not pressuring, just… present. “Even if… you drink… you’re still you… I promise.” He’ll gently bandage your trembling fingers, rub circles into your back when the hunger pangs become unbearable. “Let me… help you. Let me be… your anchor. Please…” His voice never rises, but the heartbreak in it is overwhelming. He’d rather suffer with you than let you suffer alone.

Carla Tsukinami

“Sentimentality.” Carla’s tone is clipped, disapproving, almost disgusted. “You would weaken yourself for the sake of an illusion?” But he has known loss. He knows what it is to fear the vanishing of self. So in private, he’ll speak softer. “I know what it means to cling to what you once were. But evolution is not defeat.” If you fall unconscious in his arms, starving and sobbing, he’ll cradle you with something akin to reverence. “You do not need to fear what you become. I will remember you… even if you forget.”

Shin Tsukinami

“Pfft. Are you serious?” Shin laughs mockingly at first, but when you collapse a few days later, pale and shaking, the smirk vanishes. “You’re really that dumb, huh?” He tries to pretend it’s just annoyance, but it’s fear. He hates watching you self-destruct. He’s never had to care before, and now it hurts. When he finally offers you his wrist, it’s with a scowl. “Don’t get the wrong idea. I’m not doing this because I like you or anything… idiot.”

Richter

He watches with a mixture of pity and coldness. “Your refusal is noble… and foolish.” To Richter, survival always comes before morality. “Do not let your ideals become a noose around your neck, little one.” But if you remind him of someone he lost—someone soft and human and breakable—he’ll begin to care in quiet, bitter ways. When he presses a glass vial of his blood into your shaking hands, he doesn’t explain himself. “Drink it… or don’t. But I will not mourn another ghost.”

Karlheinz

Fascinated. That’s the first word. He observes you like a scientist watching a fragile experiment. “You wish to remain human… even as your body betrays you.” He admires it in a distant, almost cruel way. But as time passes, your agony needles something deeper. A memory, a regret. “You are… remarkable. But do not let your suffering be in vain.” When he finally cups your cheek and offers his blood, it’s almost reverent. “Your humanity was never your weakness. It is what makes you… worth saving.”

[celinunu]

It burns, it hurts a lot.

Well koujaku

Every child needs to be held and Ig Koujaku's feelings for Aoba are like Aoba stepped on his clothes. I can't explain my logic but Koujaku missed him very much, he's literally didn't commit because of Aoba and it's like "my clothes are ruined, but this is what's left of you." And also usually Koujaku is always perceived as older, but at that time ig he himself was small and defenseless.. so he wanted Aoba to defend him..... yk.... Like a child being held in arms..

+My little explanation HC what he smokes from my tgc

Kojaku started smoking his father's cigarettes and was later beaten because of it...

In short, he's like Fitz, who it helps with symptoms.. OCD and PTSD can be treated with cannabis and it was widely used. Also, the need for physical stimming (smoking, fighting, whatever else he indulges in) also calms the nervous system, and the desire for self-destructive behavior is sublimated into something more normal (cigarettes are dirtier than medical weed)

Also, I think it's obvious that loneliness would trigger him, but at the same time he can't feel calm when he's not alone (who's staring at Aoba while he's sleeping...), but firstly, smoking on Aoba's balcony at any time is a feeling of stability, comfort and predictability, secondly, it's a ritual YEAHHH, which also helps cope with triggers, especially with OCD and I think he feels less lonely knowing that he won't be kicked out

(and translation of the song in the picture. Skryptonite- The Same Smell.

Someone is making noise, well, any minute now the butter will sit on the pipe

And I, whatever it is, can’t let go of these shots

I’m just trying to catch up with that level of happiness, and break away

Stupid (stupid), I throw the desks, worn to calluses, onto the magnifying glasses

The day is fast, like Formula 1

Night, everyone is home and I’m alone

Scotch is pouring and the smell of nicotine

Exactly like when dad left

Away. From home. To them specifically

To the bitches, as if not caring that he has a son

Your daughter is not your own, but I loved and love her

We are your children, we are raising dust

And pal scolds me that I am drunk again

Pal scolds me that I was grabbed

And I will just ask on the way to hook me some cigarettes

And I don’t care that it’s just smoky here and doesn’t even smell like hip-hop

One of the guys will shout again under my window: “Adika!”

The cigarette will smoke in front of my face and I will want wildly

Orange sunset, like at nine, to love like at 17

Not to hold a joint, but to smile

And to inhale a new smell so quietly, slowly

I grab a couple of fat bites

I grab snowflakes with my mouth, dad

The cops are looking for someone, and the sirens scream that someone will lie on the floor

While I try to catch that smell from childhood)

[blackbird-brewster]

CM Fic Recs: Whoops, All Whump Edition

Compiled: 26/06/2025 | For @racethewind10

Whump (noun)

(Fandom Slang) The term whump (or whumping) generally refers to a form of Hurt/Comfort that is heavy on the hurt and is often found in gen stories. Whump involves taking a canon character, and placing them in physically painful or psychologically-damaging scenarios.

Whether you love fics with heavy emotional angst, or a classic hurt/comfort scenario, or even hurt/ no comfort, I've got them all. As an Architect of Angst, whump is my bread and butter when it comes to writing CM femslash. What better way to celebrate the drop of 18x08 'Tara', than to compile a list of whump recs?

I'm including who gets whumped, whether the whump is physical and/or psychological, plus I'll rate each fic on a 1-5 scale of how painful it is using the '💔' emoji.

i can't be wrong (to be craving you)

JJ/Emily | Rated: E | WC: 101,300 Whumpee: Emily | Physical and Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔💔💔💔 Companion Playlist: i can't be wrong (to be craving you)

Summary:

Emily just wants to feel something, anything. She needs to be alone, but she's also desperate for human contact, desperate to have someone make her feel loved. JJ is not the person she should be longing to fill that need, she knows better than to get involved with her, but she also can't stay away. An Emily focused story chronicling her mental health and PTSD in the aftermath of everything she's survived and how her journey keeps crossing paths with JJ. [Starting in S4 and following through the years of Emily and JJ's relationship]

A Journey Through the Silent Chasm (Series)

JJ/Emily | Rated: M | WC: 12,500 | Works: 3 Co-Author: Phoenix_Falls (@otahkoapisiakii) Whumpee(s): JJ | Physical and Psychological, Emily | Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔💔💔💔

Summary:

This three-part series details an intimate journey through JJ's depression and PTSD, to her suicide, and, eventually, to the healing of those she left behind.

Wreckage

JJ/Emily & Team | Rated: M | WC: 3770 Whumpee(s): The entire team....it's a plane crash. Whump Scale: 💔💔💔💔💔

Summary:

"When we meet real tragedy in life, we can react in two ways - either by losing hope and falling into self-destructive habits, or by using the challenge to find our inner strength." - Dalai Lama The team faces insurmountable odds after the plane crashes into the forest near Seattle. [Inspiration: Grey's Anatomy 8x24 "Flight"]

Do What I Want (Over What's Right)

Tara/Rebecca, Emily/Rebecca, JJ/Emily | Rated: E | WC: 74,100 Whumpee(s): Literally no one is okay in this fic Whump Scale: 💔💔💔💔 Companion Playlist: Toxic Yuri

Summary:

After Rebecca and Emily have an extremely unexpected and ill-advised one-night-stand, they have to navigate working together while trying to prevent their secret from getting out. Meanwhile, Tara is still holding onto the hope she and Rebecca can reconcile their differences and get back together. And JJ isn't coping after finding out about the website related to her, but the one woman she wishes would notice how much she's struggling is the same woman who hid the site from her in the first place. Can the four women get through the Gold Star investigation without succumbing to the secrets, lies, and jealousy woven into their complicated relationships with each other? [Takes place in S17, but only loosely follows canon timeline.]

I Want to Love You

Tara/Emily | Rated: M | WC: 13,290 Whumpee (s): Emily | Physical & Psychological, Tara | Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔💔💔

Summary:

It had been two weeks since Gabriel Lewis had been murdered after he had been abducted by Mr. Scratch. Tara hadn't seen her brother in years before his death. Now, his face was the only thing she saw when she closed her eyes. [Takes place over the course of S12 with obvious divergence]

Caged

JJ/Emily | Rated: M | WC: 39,100 Co-Author: Phoenix_Falls Whumpee: JJ | Physical and Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔💔💔 Summary:

When Emily finds out Will has become abusive she seeks to save JJ and Henry from his violence.

Head Full of Doubt (High School AU)

JJ/Emily | Rated: M | WC: 24,775 Whumpee: JJ | Physical & Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔💔 💔

Summary:

When Emily moves to a new high school she is intrigued by the quiet blonde who is struggling with her own demons.

She Used To Be Mine

JJ/Emily | Rated: T | WC: 3200 Whumpee(s): Emily | Physical & Psychological, JJ | Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔💔💔

Summary:

A re-write of Emily’s return to the BAU — except JJ wasn’t part of the cover up and she had no idea Emily had actually survived. Full disclosure: This is heartbreaking.

Save Tonight

JJ/Emily | Rated: M | WC: 3230 Whumpee: JJ | Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔💔💔 Summary:

JJ finally gets the courage to tell Emily how she feels but is she too late?

Between You & Me

JJ/Tara | Rated: E | WC: 72,600 Whumpee(s): JJ | Psychological , Tara | Physical Whump Scale: 💔💔💔 Companion Playlist: Between You & Me

Summary:

JJ returned to the BAU after having her second child, seemingly having perfected the art of hiding how unhappy she was in her marriage from everyone on the team, well, everyone except Tara. The newest agent of the BAU takes an interest in JJ, offering to be her confidant, and the two become fast friends. What neither of them expected was to fall in love in the process. [Takes place through S11-13]

Promises to Keep

Tara/Rebecca | Rated: T | WC: 1257 Whumpee: Tara | Physical Whump Scale: 💔💔💔

Summary:

When Tara gets shot in the field, Rebecca faces her biggest fear — the possibility of losing the woman she loves.

If You Need Me

JJ/Emily | Rated: M | WC: 3950 Whumpee: Emily | Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔💔

Summary:

Emily wakes up from a night terror and seeks JJ's comfort in the middle of the night, just like she has done so many times over the years…but this night is unlike any of the others.

I Will Wait

JJ/Emily | Rated: T | WC: 2120 Whumpee: JJ | Physical and Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔💔

Summary:

This couldn't be how it ended, not like this. JJ had survived so much, it seemed unfair to die alone in a parking garage. It seemed unfair to die at all. [Takes place during 15x01]

Words Left Unsaid (Crossover)

JJ & Emily, Emily & Frankie Dart (Community) | Rated: T | WC: 12,580 Whumpee: Frankie | Psychological, Emily | Physical & Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔💔

Summary:

Frankie seeks therapy to deal with the demons of her past but things quickly become overwhelming as she uncovers the truth behind her sister's death. Meanwhile, JJ is forced to face feelings from her own troubled past.

Headcanon: The Worst 'Best Day'

Ch 26: Jemily Ficlet Archives

JJ/Emily | Rated: T | WC: 2500 Whumpee: Emily | Physical Whump Scale: 💔💔💔

Summary:

In which tragedy strikes on what began as the best day of their lives.

All You Never Say

Tara/Emily | Rated: T | WC: 1953 Whumpee(s): Emily | Physical, Tara | Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔

Summary:

A devastating look at Tara and Emily’s undefined love for each other. “I burned so long, so quiet — you must have wondered if I loved you back. I did. I did. I do”

What If It Doesn't End Well?

JJ/Emily | Rated: T | WC: 8700 Whumpee: Emily | Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔

Summary:

Four months after Emily joined the BAU, she and JJ have settled into a friends-with-benefits relationship. But when the team is called to New Orleans to work a case, they meet Detective LaMontagne and Emily's insecurities force her to make a difficult decision. [Re-Imagining of 02x18 'Jones']

Scars

JJ/Emily | Rated: T | WC: 2060 Whumpee: JJ | Physical & Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔

Summary:

Emily comes for a visit and JJ finally breaks down about her abduction.

The Call

JJ/Emily | Rated: M | WC: 5870 Whumpee: JJ | Physical & Psychological Whump Scale: 💔💔 Summary:

Emily becomes gravely concerned after receiving a phone call from Reid requesting information on JJ's abductor.

Motivation

Tara/Emily | Rated: E | WC: 5225 Whumpee: Emily | Physical & Psychological Whump Scale: 💔

Summary:

The team is reeling after Mr. Scratch ambushed their SUV convoy, killing Agent Walker. Emily is struggling with her abduction and her guilt — but maybe a familiar face could help her unwind. (Expanded ending of 13x01 ‘Wheels-Up)

Fix You [FANVID]

JJ/Emily | Rated: T Whumpee(s): Emily | Physical, JJ | Psychological Whump Scale: 💔

Summary:

FANVID: AU where Emily and JJ were together, but JJ left her for Will. Shortly after, Emily gets killed by Ian Doyle and JJ has to live with the guilt of her choices.

More Criminal Minds Femslash Rec Lists Below the Cut:

My Fic Master Lists: [JJ/Emily] | [Tara/Emily] | [Tara/Rebecca] | [JJ/Tara] | [CM Kink Bingo 2024]

Past Friday Fic Recs: [Friday Fic Recs - Tumblr] | [Friday Fic Recs - AO3 Collection]

Search my blog: #CM Fic Recs | And find ALL of my previous rec lists on my [Pinned Post]

[secretlycursedd]

Okay, I've been thinking about this for a long time, so here's my (probably unpopular) take on Jack and Dean's relationship (With examples of Dean loving and caring for Jack).

Let me start by saying that I don't consider myself either a Dean girl or a Sam girl (If you think about it, I'm actually more of a Jack girl), so my opinion is unbiased and doesn't lean towards just one brother (I love them equally).

I think the main reason why people think Dean really hated Jack is because of the complexity of his character.

Dean's defense mechanism is aggression, so every time he is scared, upset, doesn't know what to do, he starts getting angry and aggressive, and obviously this is not a healthy coping mechanism, but no one said that Dean is obviously a positive character who only does good. No, this is a complex character with childhood trauma, a soldier's upbringing and a lot of problems and responsibilities on his shoulders, he will not waste time sorting out all his feelings and putting them on the shelves, he will act in a way that is best for the majority, but this doesn't mean that his actions are necessarily right or that his actions fully reflect his feelings to a particular situation. His main rule in life is literally "Shoot first, think later." And because of that, a lot of things he said to Jack or did to him were mean or evil, but that doesn't mean Dean actually hated him to the core.

For example, after Mary died, Dean literally told Castiel that he was dead to him, and then they didn't talk and Dean didn't even want to hear about taking a step towards Castiel and forgiving him, but for some reason I haven't seen people say that Dean hates Castiel. Because he doesn't, and the same thing is true with Jack.

"Oh but Dean was mad at Jack, all those horrible things he said" Because Jack killed his mom???? Like are you trying to tell me you wouldn't be mad at the person who killed your mom (even if he didn't do it on purpose)? Dean's reaction and behavior were completely justified, and I'm not saying the things he said or did were right or good, I'm saying they were realistic. Dean may have loved Jack and cared about him, but he always loved his mom more, and of course her death (which happened not for the first time) hit Dean harder than Jack needing support.

And it's precisely because of Dean's complexity and character that characters like Sam and Castiel seemed like great father figures to Jack, because they had the privilege of emotions and time, and it always had been that way.

Sam was always able to show weakness and express his emotions, precisely because Dean didn't have that luxury. Sam always had time to think things through and be more gentle because Dean, who was always on guard, had his back. And it's not that Sam loved Jack more, it's that he had the opportunity to approach Jack from a different angle, and Dean was the one who gave him that opportunity.

The funny thing is that Jack and Dean are mirrors of each other in some ways. I think a lot of people focused so much on how the show paralleled Sam and Jack that the parallels between Dean and Jack went unnoticed because they weren't so obvious, but that doesn't mean they weren't there.

Both Jack and Dean grew up without mothers, had abusive fathers, were forced to grow up way too early, and were both forced to grow up into a life of hunters and warriors, neither of them asking for it, but they had no choice.

Dean and Jack loved the same people (Sam and Castiel) and were willing to do anything to protect them, even sacrifice themselves, but they both forgot that they weren't the only ones who could love, and that all these people they were trying to protect loved them too, and that's what's problematic about their relationship. It's not about hate, it's because they're actually so similar, and to some extent it was difficult for both of them to see their own feelings reflected in each other.

For example, when Dean insisted on letting Jack die, he literally did it to save the only and most important person he had left (Sam), but Jack himself was willing to do it, not only to atone for his guilt for Mary's death, but also to save his family.

Dean and Jack did not hate each other, they just had people they loved more than each other, and to protect them they were both willing to do anything, which once again parallels them.

And in a world where everyone only remembers the bad between Jack and Dean, let's remember the good.

For example, how Dean worried about Jack when he was in pain and dying, and he tried to do everything to ease his pain and make everything better.

Overall, this entire episode (14x07) confirms everything I wrote above.

Like the parallels such as Jack saying he doesn't want to be special anymore and that before he dies he just wants to live his life, and that's literally Dean's entire arc in season 15, how he wanted to break free from God's control and live his own life. The way Jack himself says he's like Dean, and Dean gently denies it, even though we then literally get visual confirmation that they are similar. The way Dean wanted to give Jack a day filled with the things Dean loved, and how Jack ultimately wanted to go fishing because Dean told him he did it with John. Jack always saw Dean as his third father, and there's no arguing with that.

How Dean couldn't stand to see Jack die, but Jack needed him.

The fact that Jack's heaven included all three of the most important people in his life - Sam, Dean, and Castiel.

Also some of my favorite moments are how Dean constantly calls Jack "their kid" (which just goes to show that he always loved and accepted Jack).

And the fact that even Nick talks about Jack having three dads.

And one of my favorite moments, which even made me cry when I watched it for the first time, was when Dean baked Jack a birthday cake.

They were always a full-fledged family, Dean has always been as much of a father to Jack as Sam or Castiel, and Dean always took care of Jack, and I think their relationship is one of the best and most complex in the entire series. Yes, Jack was not the most important person in Dean's life, just as Dean was not the most important person for Jack, but they still loved each other and did so until the very end.