#why are they never on my team vro...

[zestymariefan]

-854p in S rank what if i started crying lolllll

i know it's the beginning of the season and i guess X rank players are lazy in this game but why in i getting top 2,000 players against me IN S RANK NOT EVEN S+ ????

[ohagiyoo]

he has a bottlecap collection, i just know it deep down in my heart

adding onto the first point, he's the biggest fan of the fallout games

his favorite superhero is spiderman or batman

he also collects soda pop can tabs, smug bastard collects the rainbow ones with a smaller hole inside for around a month and then dumps the whole thing on you with his dumbass smirk just so you'd have to kiss him for each tab.

as a kid, he used to press insects a lot as per catching them a lot

used to be a HUUUGE peter pan fanatic s a kid

believed that if you crushed butterflies that you'd fly from its "golden dust" or smth

had an emo phase in middle school 100%

post relationship, he likes to sneak his hands around your torso, nothing sexual. he just wants to feel you

he did the trend where you trap someone while tickling them under the guise of "checking their posture." never let you live it down

HORRIFIC at fps games, literally the worst

on the contrary, minecraft is his holy grail. makes the best traps on there

has NO idea on how to talk to women, can not for the life of him interact with one he likes romantically

once he realizes he likes u after being friends for a while, hes the type to just observe you from afar when you're not with him under the (failing) disguise of him just people watching as he usually does (it is NOT fooling nobody, especially hiori. his ahh does NOT believe karaus)

#2 pebbling fan next to kurona

he's v. big on acts of service & physical touch. will NOT let go of you if you're in a crowded area (theres like, 2 people in there. he just wants to be close to u lwky)

his ass is NOT nonchalant, when he's feeling mediocre he's the type to just randomly cling to you when you're doing random tasks (only when he's down tho, he wants to look cool and mysterious the other half of the time he's with u)

if you play a sport, he WILL evaluate the other teams skills and stuff and then come up to you the night before your game to tell you about his findings like he's some double agent

when he's a little upset at you, he purposefully uses his spiked hair to just nudge you with it. especially if you're laying down with him

had an asmr phase and that's how he formed his voice fetish

one time vro told otoya about his crush and otoya, being the ass he is decided to see if karasus crush (you) would fall for vro so everytime you hang out with the two, karasu is always glancing back at otoya incase he tries anything funny to make his life worse so it's like 2 ppl fighting over your attention. (which is imo one hell of an ego boost like wdym these 2 fine men r over here FIGHTING for my attention 😍😍😍😍 )

otoya told you about the above point after like 2 weeks of doing it when he noticed you werent falling for him and you laughed at his face, his ego was a bit bruised after that.

taglist (open + ask to be added) ;; @x3nafix

notes ;; lowkey just my thoughts abt vro framed as hcs. also lwky why he so 👅👅 in those photos like DAMN

© ohagiyoo 2025 — @mikageecorp — dividers — m.list

[rizzzyyyzzyy]

notes to my crush ik he wont see this or he will since i sent him a tumblr link w my acc for a silly post lol

was written in shit like 01/07/25

Hi vro or boi where i used to call you i just wanna let you know that i love you so fucking much, i know i had lots of crush but this shit was so fucking genuine i meant that i really like you so much, today liek gang you were hanging out w c, made me kinda jealous but i ignored it since you seemed happy with her, you two have been crushing eachother for almost 2 yrs now was it ??

but I genuinely liked you, the moments where I’d skip playing games with my siblings and cousins just so iccould play roblox or MLBB with you, the way when we duo in mlbb during custom and the way we barely even lose shit made me so happy w you gng, i liked you so genuinely that id try to change things about myself for u to like, notice when i tried to stop talking to you? like trying to break oue streak of tiktok lmfao i regret that shit distancing myself to the person i really liked just for c HELP i know u two liked eachother so much that i js bottled up my feelings and try not to interfere with u guys since YOU seemed so happy w her gng this shit hurts ive been crying for like 30mins rn while writing this, lleade if u ever read this dont mention this to me irl this shits will be embarrassing asf . . . my favourite moments with you was mlbb custom or js playing random shit in roblox, the way id slightly smile and be proud at myself everytime i made u laugh, the fucking way we say slurs like we had free will THE WAY WE KEPT WINNING EVERYTIME WE GET TEAMED TOGETHER IN MLBB CUSTOM or the way id let u score goals against me in bluelock rivals js so we could compare and trashtalk eachother with no real harsh feelings, the only shit i hate is when ppl ship us cause the time during grade 7 when w egot shipped together we got really distant so i never wanted that to happen. And yes i rlly like you, no matter what even if u like C more than me you’ll always be the person ive ever wanted (cathy x mark until then DOOMED VERSION)

- hello why r we so cathy x mark hellO but pls i wish no classmate of mine could see this embarrassing shit of mine i know u might think me as weird or u couldve stopped reading this since unwere lazy

u were my one and only weakness, i loved u so much even when we were enemies in the opposite team idc, the way id target u or i let u kill me js so we could chat shit but i decided to distance myself from you since i knew C liked you so much and just wasnt comfortable with me to tell her how she really felt about you but GANG thank you for so many months of making me happy and staying late nights just so we could play games i rlly love u so much bro THANK YOU even just for being my friend we barely talked a lot irl but that didnt mattter u made me so fucking happy my family members could barely do that tysm this might be cringe for u when u read it but i fking cried doing this, tysm i wanted to let out my feelings for u but i had no one so i had to note this on fucking tumblr where i goon fic

pic reminded me of us sm but i wear red jackets and all since i was insecure of my bruises in my wrists the fact i made a whole playlist dedicated on how much i loved you too bad u love C too much i dont feel like myself rn since i never open up to anyone that much i know u might think me as a weirdo but gng please u made me so happy and thats what mattered to me the most. The way we were both happy or just me at all i had fun playing games w u i know this shitty grammars wont make sense and all but yeah

3/27/25

hi m i hope ur doing ok and well i js care for u alot the way id burn my persona games js so we could be friends again oh well i might send this after school ends so it was nice being ur classmate and ur former friend you were a great person to me the fact not a single day goes by where i regret distancing myself from you ever since I knew C liked you ( our minds werent but u were to me)

4/2/2025

i thought abt u again and im missing u actually so bad bru i cant help it, everytime in school you always try to distant your chair away from me as if i did something wrong it just wounds me on how you’re almost head over heels for C 🙁 ok hi ita been 5hrs since i wrote ts but i miss u uGHS I KUST CANT GET U OUT MY HEAD like im jealous you guys are probabky dating righr now but as long as ur happy with her gang

HI m ilysm

[gudetamix]

Ya! Tell me the full story pls!! (About kemi's ex)

ok ok but like..theres like senstive topics in here vro and its long as hell

but kemi's ex was a girl he met right after graduating from shiratorizawa at the job he picked up during his summer break. they were together for a while, but she sort of changed when he got all excited after making it on the jpn team.

she wasnt...as nice or as sweet when he wasnt on the team. whenever he would talk to her about hanging out with the team on the weekends, she would act cold towards him, basically telling him that he never spent time with her anymore even tho he would reserve the week days for her and her only, only being away when he had games to go to or for practice/training w iwa or the early morning interviews, which always happened when she was still sleeping.

thats when the team started noticing he wasnt hanging out with them as much anymore, always being busy with his girlfriend, and honestly, they respected that. you should always spend a good amount of time with your partner!! but kemi's performance started slacking.

iwaizumi noticed it first when he noticed kemi was acting more spacy during practice matches or during individual training sessions. it was like his heart wasnt there anymore, and he seemed exhausted, which is saying something for the guy who sleeps almost all the time. he always had slight dark spots, but only visible if you got really close to his face. but now? it was obvious he wasnt doing too hot, but whenever iwa asked about it, kemi just hummed before saying 'maybe my pillow isnt as fluffy...guess thats why sleep isn't good, lately.' but iwa is smart. something isnt right, but he doesnt push. just tells the others on the team to look out for him.

the person who really calls kemi out is none other than one of his lift long besties, ushijima, who called out his performance during practice. "akemi. your spikes are getting weak and you're falling behind. is something the matter?" atsumu and hinata are giving him a look of disbelief for being so blunt considering they told him to be nice about it. but honestly, being blunt is the best way to get through to kemi.

he doesnt say anything at first, just apologizes and promises he'll do better. but its the way he seems so...well, empty and..genuinely sad that makes the others super concerned.

aran is the next to confront him, pulling him aside and asking if things are okay with his girlfriend which is when kemi gets a little antsy. "i can't stay long, aran," he mumbles, eyes darting from him to the doors out of the gym. "i have to go home, she'll be upset if i'm late." and aran instantly picks up on that. it wasnt the 'i want to go home, i miss my girlfriend and she misses me' he was expecting. nah, it was the 'i have to get home because im scared she'll be angry' that he was dreading.

aran is extremely hesitant in letting kemi go. he doesn't trust this and something is telling him to convince kemi to stay with him and his sister, who was visiting, for the night, to see if maybe he can get kemi to open up a little more. after all, since they graduated, the three of them hungout a lot.

surprisingly it doesnt take much to convince him to come over, promising that he'd explain to kemi's girlfriend that he wasnt feeling well and couldnt make it home.

except, well, it didn't work. kemi's phone was blowing up the whole time he slept, aran letting him use is bed. he felt bad, awful even for going through akemi's phone but seeing all the messages she was sending, hearing the voicemails she was leaving, demanding to know where he was, what he was doing, why he wasn't home making her dinner...he was happy he checked. but also extremely disgusted.

kemi is a soft guy. everyone knows this. anyone who would take advantage of the sweet, sleepy giant who isnt that giant when compared to the others on the team is cruel as hell, so finding this out? aran was not happy and didn't hesitate to tell iwa that he was right and that they needed to do something immediately.

the next day, aran tried to convince kemi to stay over and that he could wear his clothes while kemi washed his, but kemi wouldn't stay another day, already stressing out that he didn't go home last night.

"akemi...be careful, okay? if anything happens, you tell me or someone else on the team, okay? i'll see you at practice."

akemi didn't say anything. just...gave aran this pitiful look, like he wanted to say something, ask for something but just nodded and left.

its safe to say aran and iwaizumi were beyond worried when kemi didnt show up to practice that day

[commonalex]

Gasoline

I know. I can see it in Mrs. Stella's eyes, in the pakistani guy's eyes while he scratches the gyro instead of cutting it, even the new guy's eyes that he keeps on smiling only because they didn't tell him the gas for the bike is on him. I turn my head for one single moment and I can almost hear the eyeballs rolling on my neck. "What's on Maxim's mind right now" or "will he or will he not talk about it" and "why is Maxim even here in the first place". To be honest, Maxim's not feeling quite self-explanatory right now but he is quite sure that teeth are going to go places if the weird stares keep on popping up.

-Wanna go a bit earlier tonight? You can fill in another day, no biggie, kiddo. If you ain't feeling hundred percent, better let it go and pop up when the time's rig..

Mrs. Stella's mole, upper right from her mouth, kind of trips me out every time. I can't quite make out what she tries to say by whispering with this cigarette-ducked voice of hers. Not that I'm really invested hearing her in the first place, she looks like she could really afford a convo. The pakistani guy over there looks at me kinda frightened and I return to normal mode though. Maybe I really am freaking them out and they're right for being concerned when I'm acting like this, but…

-I'm not going home. My shift's till 3, right? It's not even midnight yet.

-That's not what I said, Maxim. Don't go just because I say it, do it for Victor if you please. You understand?

-That's a topic for another time, Mrs. Stella. Gotta deliver these as long as they're still edible.

I'm pressing the water bottle on my neck for an extra second and throw it back at the fridge. The new guy tries for some chit chat to me, like real smooth and all, just so he can ride to get the delivery himself. He says that the bottle was his, I say I'm a bit sort of fucks at the moment. I'm taking the kebabs and storm outside, straight in hell.

My arms and legs are burning up on the bike and I'm still not far for the plaza. Helmet's our of the question of course, except if you're fond of third degree burns. Only this small hint of wind that drags the sweat off my face makes the ride bearable. Up and down, down and up again, steep uphills and downhills turn my brains upside down on the road and I'm trying as hard as I can to chill until my veins are back beneath my skin. I see the nightlights showering the complexes with a cold shade of yellow and I'm fantasise about the people inside them. Like they're getting melted by the heat like me, even though they are watching tv or porn while eating a bunch of fucking junk as I can hardly swallow water at this point.

I turn the key and spend a minute to look at the name. The label's "Vann", the bell's "Vann" too, all good so far. Been here to get him this stuff a hundred times, he's nothing but a divorced loner and kind of a prick on the first floor that is always up for some conversation. I ring, the entrance opens, I storm upstairs and voilà.

   Here we go again. It's not him. Full dark hair, small nose, tall, green-brown eyes, fucked up teeth and short shorts with a wide ass white tee like a curtain. Like taking a look in the fucking mirror. And it's like the tenth delivery this night? Tenth time I see his ass, looking just like me but not really like me. Last nine times I froze and didn't have the courage to think about it out of fear and cringe, let alone not having the money of the delivery to return back at the tavern. But this went too far. If I'm returning for the tenth time only with some cheap coins and excuses Mrs. Stella will have her reason to nag about me. Like what could you say about this shit in the first place? That you saw a dude that kinda looked like you and got the chills?

-Got the card thingy with you?

I barely nod no. He exhales in frustration and asks for change from a ten. He could flip me upside down and wouldn't find enough to even buy a lollie. I nod again. Again with the exhales. He stressfully throws these dirty ass coins in my hand until I have the 4,40. I'm making my move.

-What a coincidence, right? Makes you crazy. It's like a mirror even.

He just stares at me like I just fucked his day up just by talking to him.

-Are these enough, bro?

-Is Mr. Vann gone from here? You heard where he went or something?

-Oh fuck me, you in for a chit chat man? Really? God.

What the hell.

-I only asked.

-So what? Are we like best friends and I didn't know or something?

The door slams my face with the apartment's awful smell as I'm stuck at picking up the coins that fell to the carpet and battling sweat in a hurry just so I can get back outside and stop myself from thinking about how this fucking clone knows my name.

The route back to the tavern seems stretched in my eyes. I feel the bike like it's sliding backwards and I'm trying to catch up with the lost road in front of me. I take turns in weird streets and stop to look if anything is wrong with my wheels; all good though. Could it be me? Dunno. It just looks so strange to me that each and every one that opens his door before me is that same asshole imitating me and shit. Could it be this cheap expired beer I dared to chugg? Nah, must be the heat. A little bit of inside/outside and you're seeing stars for sure. I mean my fingers keep sticking at the handles for God's sake.

I'm circling the plaza to get the sweat out of me and slip through the back door to bypass the lava coming from the gyro; in vain, of course. Even the boomers that were eating like crazy along with their toddlers on the tables outside have gone with their faces looking like a red traffic light, as the pakistani guy said to me. Just by studying his face I can see that as much as he got scared before, he has nothing but pity for me. I mean look at me. I'm nothing but panda eyes, crazy hair and arms and legs really stick-looking. All that plus the fact that I also have rivers of sweat on my neck right now. Why am I like this?

-Why are you like this?

Mrs. Stella spawns behind the fan only to fuck with me again. It must be a pleasure for her to annoy people jsut so we can see her mole dance and feel the rust in her voice to the bone marrow.

-Again with the coins, what can I do? They all want to swipe their cards now.

-Go home, kiddo, take a shower and lay down. We have much more things to worry than you. Do you think we are wanna check on you?

-Yeah man, she's right, Maxim.

Someone remind me when I deliver the next patch to make a call at the missing persons line because for hours we can't find who the fuck gave the new guy the right to get in my shit. I did has my chance with him in private though and explained him crystal clear to stay out of my shit. You know, with logical thinking and maybe threats. Mostly threats I think. Maybe at some point I might have said I have Russian mob ties, gambling on the fact that he might didn't find out that I'm really Ukrainian yet.

-I only need some air. It's like an oven in here.

I really tried to follow Mrs. Stella this time. But because of the mole and the new guy tag teaming on busying my balls I got knocked out. I could listen more enjoyably and clearly the fan spinning around above me than her and her sidekick. I only made out a small chunk of what she spilled.

-And please, take off what you're wearing. Put your own clothes again please.

-Ain't those mine too?

-No. They're Victor's.

Times like this I wish I wasn't so socially incapable to be so shy about asking again the pakistani guy's name again. It would make things so less awkward when I was trying to ask him for the next order. Maybe even less awkward if I hadn't had Mrs. Stella reaching New heights with her raspy voice while I was leaving again.

Of course this all storming out shit caught up to me. I've never seen this street in my life. Could be Mrs. Stella have her pathetic tavern on the Internet order sites to get deliveries across the fucking milky way? But now that I'm thinking about it she's answering the phone every time she gets a text message.

Google maps says 12 kilometers and I'm cursing every saint in existence. All the money that didn't get down the drain thanks to that imposter dude will get down the drain for gasoline. I'm steering and get through streets I normally wouldn't cross even with a bloody tank just to save 2 or so minutes from the route. I pick my head up and feel the breeze cuddling my neck and chest. Finally. Traffic's at an all time low and I really can step in the gas a bit but the heatwave growing arms and legs and all runs behind me. When I get off and go to the apartment building's entrance, heat already caught up to me.

I'm pausing. Name on the bell Al-Jirarddlosomething, the same at the order; and no I won't even begin to try to pronounce this thing. I ring, the entrance opens in 3 secs and enough roaches storm out for a 5 on 5 basketball game, bench included.

I'm hearing traction and voices behind the door, something like that, but I really wanna stick my ear to hear what's going on. Of course this is the time the guy opens up. Or the girl, you don't know.

-So now you found the house, vro? Now that I'm showering?

But you do know.

Same outfit minus the sweatiness, same face, same attitude, same me for up to like 90% percent. And I don't want to be that guy, but I really don't think this is the Al-Jiriarlasomethjng guy. Maybe for a prick.

-9,60.

-What about the coke?

-It's in there, ain't it?

-Take a wild guess.

-Didn't you ask for a bottle?

-Can. I asked for a can. Why would I want a bottle? Where could I put it?

Take a wild guess.

No, I'm joking. I paid for the bottle thing. It wasn't his fault. He asks me full offended why would I pay for him.

-Well, you don't find your long lost twin every day, ha ha. Maxim, and yours?

-All fucking around and saying shit, ah Maxim? Aren't you bored of this already? Good lord.

I think I need to learn how to make friends again.

Gasoline’s is nearly gone, the route I took got lost inside my head as I zig zagging between the buildings and the road is nothing but tar right now with me boiling in it. Still no cars around, though. It's only July and the neighborhood got deserted. It's now so quiet the noise from the engine hits the buildings and bounces back to my eardrums. I'm dizzy as hell right now.

I'm swimming back at the plaza. Outside there are only two tables stuck together with broke and boozed up Airbnb tourists that share fucking french fries and kebabs as two old folks take their dog out for a walk, right beside them. How miserable. Like I know the neighborhood is dead, little by little each day, but tonight you car really feel the death and rotting right up your nostrils. As if something so tragic happened that no one has the courage to address it loudly. Like they're all busy trying to catch a unicorn or something, just to keep their heads off the despair.

-You're not getting it, do you?

I don't have the energy to do this conversation again. Nothing new will be said. If I could I would just stare at Mrs. Stella until she can finally take a fucking hint that I could not care less about what she's been trying to talk about all night with me.

-Forgive me for doing the job you're paying me to do. Not gonna happen again.

-Believe it or not, but as long as you are here you're like my son to me. Even if you're Ukrainian, doesn't matter.

I'm looking sideways like a shark at the pakistani guy that plays with his phone and I want to burst laughing. Dunno exactly why. Maybe because I can't picture her talking the same thing to him. I'm not saying she's racist, I'm saying that she's really focused with me right now that is getting ridiculous. And that she is kind of racist.

-I don't get where this conversation goes. All I know is that I don't wanna do it.

-I do.

Isn't democracy great.

-Where's the new guy at?

-Gone. He wanted to bounce and I just let him go. Maybe cause that's a shit job, maybe cause you were acting like an asshole. Who knows?

-What can I say. I'm sorry.

-You are not sorry. That's exactly what you wanted.

-I don't get it.

-Oh you get it alright. Tell me, you really believe that something bad is going to happen if someone takes Victor's work? As if something bad is going to happen.

I don't want this. I don't need this.

-This is way over the line.

-What can I do to help you? People look at you and you just look back at them like they just called you a hoe. "It will pass" I though, "he's going to rest his head a bit and get right back at his feet". But nothing. It's like you enjoy all this. Being kinda like sick. Just like today, damn; you keep on popping back in there with a different color on your face.

-Ok..

-And then I get the new guy I here and you turn to a complete ass of yourself. As if no one's gets to Victor's place equals that nothing have ever happened. Do you seriously believe that? Answer me, because it seems like I can't make you go home.

-You're right.

And her mole rides a bitter smile of assurance. It was kind of spectacular. Too bad it didn't last long when she saw me catching the last order on my way out. I'm outside and still can feel her cigarette breath on my back.

I'm rolling to the gas station two blocks away and spill my last money for three drops. Worth it, though, if this means getting away from my boss's lecture again. I'm rolling my last cig waiting for a car or something to cross the boulevard. Something that indicates that there's still life and pulse here. I'm waiting until my fingers get toasted, no one. I'm turn the key and fly away. I can't just stand doing nothing; doing nothing makes me think of this kind of shit and nothing good comes out of that.

Distance? A fuck lot. Buildings get unfamiliar quite fast and I'm down this straight line for god know how much time but the gas indicator is still stuck a 1/3. Complexes seven to eight floors high, gardens, yards and a scent of sea salt coming from somewhere near. Did I really get that far south?

Τhe street has the name of an ancient guy with so many syllables even his momma had a hard time calling him, while the number of the address was at a large concrete war crime of nine floors. The fluorescent Bell had one of those weird new female names like Mirtianna or Christian the and that shit with an "astrology" sticked at the end. Of course I got ringed instantly. I getting to the elevator for the ninth floor and try to pick my words for him. I know he's gonna be there, I just need some answers. But how do you start a convo about that? Well, I'm lucky I didn't start it.

-What kind of bullshit is this you're telling her? Did she do you wrong?

I'm trying to read his face. There's not much emotion there, only a small frustration and some eagerness to shut the door right up my face again.

-Well, you could say that.

-Nonsense. You’re just being Maxim again. Spoiled and dumb Maxim. As always.

-Alright. It’s 7,90.

-She’s right, you know. You kinda into all of this. As far as it goes your way, at least. After that you just continue where you left.

-Ok. 7,90. I need to return back money, right?

-Stop wasting time trying to catch unicorns, bro. It’s fine, it’ll pass, you don’t need to follow me around all the time. I mean I’m gone.

What. Is. Happening.

-Oh I’m following you? You just keep popping up in front of me.

-That’s not how it works, Maxim. You feel alone, I get that. But that doesn’t make it ok acting like a dumbass.

-7,90.

-If there’s a problem, at least try to tackle it. Don’t wait for it to go away with your eyes closed.

-Nice to see you, Victor.

I almost tripped on my way down. I got vertigo and chills on my spine for no real reason whilst the scent of the sea from here burns my lungs. I got to get out of here. I got to go back.

With the dizziness in my head I have everything around me move and vibrate the same time the bike barely slides down the road. I can actually catch up with my eyes the buildings rotate around themselves like bolts, the balconies of the apartments wide open with the blueish light of a tv on shining like a projector outside, the yellow stars above me getting bigger and bigger until they turn to street lights. It’s like the world is running down my feet.

I’m processing the things he said to me tonight. I don’t care if he is or isn’t Victor, I only want to understand why is all this happening. I knew that it wouldn’t make much sense for everyone else at the beginning but now I have a difficult time making some of it too. The only thing I seem to achieved tonight was to turn my brains to mush and make things actually harder for me just cause I wanted to get involved to this. All night went to the trash bin because I had the curiosity fucking up my head about understanding what’s happening when in reality nothing matters to me anymore. Why? I don’t know. Because I might really love being like this after all and fucking up my head all on my own like a psycho.

I have no idea how to end all this. Maybe this isn’t as important, though. Like maybe I might be back home right now watching nickelodeon shows until I doze off. Or maybe I have some sort of something and have to go to the doctor; any doctor. Whatever it needs, I don’t care, I’ll go first thing tomorrow. If there’s a problem I’ll try to tackle it. I can’t wait for it to go way with my eyes clo-

Dunno how it happened. I can make out the branches of the trees on the plaza and a silver jeep beast blinding me with its lights. Gasoline is raining on my head I can feel the clatter of people into my ear. They shout and yell above me with their throats clogged in tar; don’t understand a word of them. I’m thirty meters at worst from the tavern and Mrs. Stella is looking me shocked with her mole chilling over the big O that she forms with her mouth. The pakistani guy drags me beside yelling “HEY HEY MAXIM HEY, ZAMEER”. I don’t know if I can feel anything belloc my neck but I’m definitely happy with myself for finding out his name again at last so I wouldn't have to hold that grudge. It’s something. Something small that maybe make me look less ridiculous, stupid and useless that I got hit by a car and going to die at the same exact spot my twin brother died, only a week later.

[xpwewarchive]

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro (3-27-2020)

Friday Night Pyro Episode #419 March 27th, 2020 Los Angeles, California The Barracks

Show Intro

Commentary: Kaitlyn Khaos & Nick Simmonds

Opening Segment: Champagne Clausen comes down dapperly dressed. Champagne: “It was last January at Guilty as Charged I was in the midst of the most dominant world title run in this promotion. And I warned the All Man not to metal in that and what did he do..he did. I told him then that “consequences will never be the same!” And it took this long, whether it was our bean-headed general manger Romeo Roselli who told me I couldn’t challenge for the title as long as he was champion well then just like I thought and just like everyone else All Man proved he was indeed “just a TRANSITIONAL champion” and now here we stand. 2 days! 2 days! I get my hands on that rat and I get my hands on that smiling, that fake, that fraud, that snake in sheep’s clothing Golden Bryce. I get my hands on both of them. I don’t gotta pin em, I don’t gotta knock them out, I don’t even have to snap their leg in half. ALL I HAVE TO DO is hit one move. Three times. In the blink of a second, in the pop of a cork I can be world champion again

Freight Train enters Train: “I think you might have a bad memory Curtis cause I remember it was only 6 or 7 days ago in this building you pushed my friend. You hit your daddy. You did a bad thang. Well you know what you might have just pissed me of. I took Troy off the medicines and Sunday he’s gonna have a lot to say so you better cover your hind-end or say I’m sorry cause I bet he’s real mad Champagne: Huh...haha Do they call you Freight Train because your the size of a train or do they call you Freight Train because your mind tends to slip off of the tracks. Because NEWS FLASH idiot! He’s a vegetable! He has no memory, no frame of reference since Halloween! Y’know the one with candy! Bring em out! I’m sure he’ll come out here and tell nobody in the crowd that he’s the best, we’ll I’ll say this if he does anything again to impede MY SPOTLIGHT. I’m gonna do more than sedate him. I’ll sedate him permanently and you can whisper that to that human bag of meat. So why don’t you go do that

Freight Train slumps his shoulders and leaves he keeps looking back sadly

Champagne: LEAVE!

All Man, All Woman & Scott Steiner enter

Steiner : Your daddy issues are nobody’s concern your moron. Nobody gives a damn about your carrot cake brain daddy ok all people wanna see is THE POPPA BACK ON PYRO! LOOK AT THE LARGEST ARMS IN THE WORLD

2 weeks ago! I got checked into the hospital and I looked the grim reaper right in his beetie eyes and told him I ain’t leaving until the ALL MAN wins the title 2 times! 2 times!

All Man: 2 times! 2 times!

Champagne: that’s cute, I’m looking to do what neither of you have done. Win that title a second time myself, All Man really? Let’s recall your title reign, you beat me after I had a hard fought match, you beat me with a low battery okay and then you defended it at Flirting With Disaster and Golden Bryce beat you in 8 minutes and let’s see Scott I’ll use your math here.

Steiner: HEY THATS MY GIMMICK! GIVE IT BACK! GIVE IT BACK TO ME!

Golden Bryce enters with the TITLE

Golden Bryce: I feel like I’m watching Step Brothers right now lol both of you sound the same. Complaining. Not doing. I MEAN GUYS! 48 hours! 3 finishers. ZERO FANS! Oh wait sorry Tenille, I respect women!! Scott! glad to see you’ve made a 100% recovery

Steiner: SHUT UP GOLDYLOCKS

Bryce: corpses tries not to laugh

Steiner: Listen up!

All Woman: Scott Steiner!, This Sunday it’s going to be a 3 Way Dance for the XPWEW World Title at Blitzkrieg between All Man, Champagne Clausen and Golden Bryce! What’s your opinion on the upcoming bout?

Steiner: **You know they say that ALL MEN are created equal but you look at the ALL MAN and you look at Champagne Clausen and you can see that statement is not true. See normally if you go 1 on 1 with the another wrestler you got a 50/50 chance of winning. But All Man is ALL IN and he’s not normal. So you got a 25% chance AT BEST of beating All Man at Blitzkrieg! Then you add GOLDYLOCKS to the mix! Your chances drastic go UP! Because he can’t win a big main event match to save him life and he ain’t even gonna try! See the 3 way at Blitzkrieg. You got a 33 1/3rd chance of winning, but All Man! All Man has got a 66% and 2/3rd’s chance of winning!

Senior Champagne! The numbers don’t lie and they spell disaster for you at Blitzkrieg!

Kaitlyn Khaos: “I’ve just gotten word from General Manger Romeo Roselli that tonight! The world champion Golden Bryce will go 1 on 1 with Champagne Clausen and All Woman will act as the special guest referee. That’s gonna be interesting and that is tonight’s main event!”

<<Let’s get this COVID-19 awareness episode of Pyro under way and take it straight to the action!

1 on 1 M1: Doxy Deity defeats All Woman w/ All Man and Scott Steiner @ ringside

<<<Back and forth contest, both competitors were able to get action and offense, This match showcased All Woman even in LOSS because she’s had very limited ring time in the Fed since joining last July but this match we got to see her shine a bit because she really has only had a handful of matches here. In the end Doxy would catch All Woman mid air off the top rope then hits her finish in a great matchup. Quick and fast paced. Steiner’s ringside commentary made it funnier” Steiner: “Do it for my freaks?!!!!”

[PROMO\Hype] Lockdown 7 in 56 days May 23rd, 2020 Dubai, United Arab Emirates mini documentary showing performers hyping up the biggest event of the year

[In-ring segment] Interview from James Westerbeck! XPWEW INTERNATIONAL CHAMPION! Slayer w/ Rosemary& Lotus

Priscilla Kelly bathtub promo }}} Priscilla via Titan tron challenges Slayer to a match for the xpwew international title this Sunday at Blitzkrieg

Slayer accepts So just like that! BREAKING NEWS! This Sunday at Blitzkrieg Slayer will defend his XPWEW International Title 1 on 1 against Priscilla Kelly! Sheeeeeeeeee’s baaaaaaaaaaack

((Slayer walks to the back)) (((Rosemary joins the commentary booth with Kaitlyn Khaos and Nick Simmonds and she’s in character the whole time and Rosemary is creeping Kaitlyn Khaos our the whole time, absolute golden on the mic during this match. Hyping Lotus up!

1 on 1 M2: Lotus defeats Genevalisse

PROMO: XPWEW commercial informing all the UK fans that we sincerely apologize that Blitzkrieg set for this Sunday was suppose to take place at the O2 in London but not to worry because! *Anarchy in the UK by Sex Pistols plays “Because this September we are bringing the XPWEW Anarchy Rules pay-per-view to you! That’s right! We can’t wait to bring the best fans in the world some Xtreme wrestling!!!”

The Set enters Ruckus joins commentary but he is silent the whole time (he goes to light up a blunt) Nick Simmonds: Do you mind um I uh have bad asthma Ruckus: hits blunt coughs intensely/ Damn Vro me too < Siaka Lexoni is sensational at the commentary booth putting over Jordan Oliver, Myron and Kotto over big time >

Tag Team Match M3: Myron Reed & Kotto Brazil defeat Jacques & Dragon Kid

1 on 1 [XPWEW Juniorweight Title ON THE LINE] M4: Jordan Oliver defeats Based Fabian

(((Match of the night, total spot fest #Dive)))

Garrett Thompson and Ethan Bedlam enters GT @ McGraw (speaking into camera) “Last week McGraw it was merely a flesh wound! Merely a mercy beating! I could have beaten your bullocks within an inch of your life, but your little wee damsel in the distress saved your backside huh. Ryu come to this ring.

McGraw enters with a neck brace on

Ryu steps in front of him “it’s not worth it, he’s scum, he’s scum, don’t do this. Not now.” GT and Bedlam wants McGraw with his hand motions just baiting him in to come get this 2 on 1 beatdown < McGraw jerks the mic out of Ryu “You gotta be the luckiest muffin eating sum bitches I’ve ever seen! Ethan Bedlam get your finger outta Garrett’s ass GT: “Your not funny....Not funny mate” Leonard: Oh that ain’t funny. Not so funny. Well hell son I’m not a modern day Monty Python here shit But if this is all comedy, if this shit is just a joke to you GT I’d suggest I get your input on this next bit ive been working on! [[[MCGRAW SLOWLY PULLS AWAY THE NECK BRACE REVEALING THAT HE IS NOT INJURED THIS WHOLE TIME] <<GT cocks his head sideways and Bedlam looks back and forth in confusion>> McGraw: Oh well hell it ain’t funny but it damn sure is peculiar. This neck straightening device here don’t mean shit to me because damn son I don’t need it I’m not injured I don’t have broken neck, I don’t have a broken bollocks or whatever the fuck you said, I don’t have a bedfellow named Ethan and I sure as hell don’t have a fanger stuck up nobody’s ass but what I do have is a challenge I want you in this ring 1 on 1 this Sunday you big bastard GT: Leo, You don’t deserve a match against me you peasant. But I’ll say this. If you can beat...Ethan Bedlam...1 on 1 inside a steel cage this Sunday then you’ll get your match Larry the Cable guy Leonard: So this is how we’re gonna play it? Your gonna put your life partner in harms way like at? I’ll step in a steel cage Sunday but right now I’m just gonna get a piece of your ass first ((Mic slams)) Leonard hits the ring and takes out both Bedlam and GT but GT gets out of dodge by throwing Bedlam in front and Him quickly

LEONARD MCGRAW DECKS ETHAN BEDLAM WITH THE BUCKSHOT AND DAMN NEAR TAKES HIS HEAD OFF!

McGraw in ring flips off GT standing at stage

[PROMO] Dark Side of The Ring commercial airs “The death of the Xtreme Giant” premieres this Tuesday only on VICE

Leonard McGraw and Ryu join commentary Ryu is nice and polite Nick Simmonds: “Leonard why did you pretend you had a neck injury” McGraw: “I got kids to feed man and sometimes it’s a good way to get out of work shit! But even I get complacent I wanna get back in there and I’m fixing to beat Ethan Bedlam’s ass in that cage match come Sunday

1 on 1 M5: Genevalisse defeats Lola Starr

Match Announcement!!!

Kiera Hogan will now defend her XPWEW Women’s Title against Genevalisse this Sunday at Blitzkrieg 2020

Special Guest Referee: All Man & All Woman enter

Champagne Clausen enters

XPWEW World Heavyweight Champion Golden Bryce enters!!!

SpecialGuestReferee: All Woman 1 on 1 M6: Golden Bryce defeats Champagne Clausen

Bryce raises the title up high and All Man low blows him and attacks him from behind at the cheering and behest of Scott Steiner who encouraged him to blindside Bryce but Steiner slides in a steel chair All Man sizes up Bryce but Bryce ducks and All Man cracks Champagne over the skull with the steel chair and Bryce stands up in All Man’s face and they press up against each other s foreheads and it’s an epic finish but you can hear Steiner in the background “Hit him! Hit him! Hit him he’s right on ya”

Show ends