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nejishadow · 10 months ago

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Kenjikoto / Makokenji half-drabbles and ideas I have no energy to do anything with, because I haven't written fanfic in years, that I don't want to sit in the queue for weeks so it's getting posted now

Feel free (please do!) to expand / finish / take inspo from these for this ship, and please tag me / message me / something if you do because I crave content and exploration between these two. Unhinged tags and comments about how I inspired something/anything give me the biggest amount of fuel to keep creating art!!

Do you wanna see me ramble in real time about these weirdos / pos?? Join @bakafurai 's Kenji Enjoyer Club Discord (in their pinned)!

Some get real long so it's all going below a cut!

Every idea here now has a finished fic!

((These are all ideas and things written as stream of consciousness to just get my ideas out in a discord channel, so don't expect the best dialogue, formatting, or anything else, I haven't finished a full piece of writing and/or fanfic in years, ha))

Seeing these screenshots my first thought - and a tag I immediately added - was 'you heard the man, Yuki, give him a piggyback ride!'

But I kept thinking like. Makoto's strong. He could? He should??

Makoto kneeling down, telling Kenji to get on then, he'll take him home

Kenji chuckle or laugh, assumes he's joking or being silly like usual, sure Yuki, you can totally do that

Makoto getting serious, if you don't pick in the next couple seconds I'm leaving you behind. Kenji panicks at that and gets on without thinking and is surprised when Makoto stands up and carries him no problem (insert "I hope this doesn't awaken anything in me")

too shocked that Makoto can even do this to be embarrassed, maybe asks Makoto why he's doing this, Kenji could've just sucked it up. Answer something like "because I wanted to", Yuki doesn't elaborate much on those things.

Gives Kenji some time to do stuff he usually wouldn't, like study Makoto's hair, hear the music spilling out the headphones etc. I like the idea he just gets so relaxed on the way home he falls asleep but Makoto keeps carrying him

It's totally just a Best Bros privilege thing, could mean nothing more!! Simply don't think about how it made you feel ever again

Bonus of

Kenji talking to Makoto in the classroom, Junpei coming up making some joke about how people saw them, asking if Makoto can do that for him too (laugh, joke, being friend.)

And Makoto boils it down to: no

That makes Kenji real happy, that he's special like that. But he does stuff only for Yuki too so it's normal!!

THIS NOW HAS A FINISHED FIC

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"So we've all thought about how pretty Yuki is, right, like the guy catches everyone's eye when he walks in, how couldn't we? Even with his bad fashion sense he just grabs your attention"

Kaz makes the most sense to respond, they are friends just "… I have never thought that. Are you sure you're not goin' through something?"

slaps a pic of Yosuke and Kenji These bad boys can fit so much comphet and denial in 'em!

THIS NOW HAS A FINISHED FIC

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Another idea I remembered, less fleshed but a strong visual I wanted to draw

Kenji waiting at track practice for Makoto to be done. Kenji had never seen him run so decided to wait outside for once

Of course he's impressed. Makoto seems to take his time walking everywhere, at least when they go places, but man, he can run!

Makoto flopping next to him when he's done, after everyone else disperses, small talk about how hes surprised Kenji waited out here, doesn't seem interested in sports. Kenji some speech about how he wanted to see how badly Yuki beat everyone else

it's pretty hot, and Makoto's tired, flops over into Kenji's lap. 'Let me nap here a few minutes and we can go, you're cooler than the bench'

Kenji tenses a bit, but breathes, Yuki just wants to rest, chill!… but he can't help but eventually card his hand through Makoto's bangs, pushing them up and outta the way.

Makoto opens his eyes and just looks at him, not judgemental or questioning, just observing. But oh no - Kenji had never stared at both his eyes so close oh this is a problem

quickly he removes his hand, apologizes, some comment about how Yuki just looked sweaty and he was trying to move the hair off

Makoto closes his eyes again… 'I don't mind. I am in your space, I guess…'

after a bit, Kenji relaxes and starts running his hands through the hair again, silky and feathery. He can think about how this makes him feel LATER (never), for now he just wants to enjoy this thing he likely won't get again

Tho Makoto better hope Yuko doesn't see this or she's gonna tease him about his boyfriend / biggest fan until the end of time

THIS NOW HAS A FINISHED FIC

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Pics I drew made me think of kenjikoto train ride(s):

Makoto tired, either tucks into Kenji's shoulder or leans on his head for a quick nap

Kenji doesn't mind, knows Makoto doesn't sleep the best, even if he doesn't know why

Anytime the train jostles or moves he instinctually holds Makoto's head so it doesn't shake or fall, wants him to be comfortable

it's not until they reach the destination and Makoto separates from him that Kenji thinks… oh, that was actually nice. I wish the ride could've been just a little bit longer

a bonus if Makoto senses his change in mood and gives him a shoulder bump, trying to cheer him up. Maybe offering to hang out awhile longer at the dorm or something

Aka there is no way Kenji isn't touch starved, as are all the protags and a third of the cast pft

THIS NOW HAS A FINISHED FIC

About Makoto being a frequent napper: Asks Kenji to eat on the roof with him almost exclusively so he can take a nap, because he's just a lil bit silly like that. Gives Kenji time to just talk to him, ramble, hard to do that when you're out eating food.

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Girl Advice made me think of a rough conversation

"Everyone assumes you're cold, man. No wonder you dont have a girlfriend! Even if they talked to you, a few words outta your mouth and they'd turn tail and leave."

"Why's it so important to have a girlfriend, anyway?" Eats some of his lunch bread

"You're such a good guy, you deserve one, man!" A shoulder tap. "If they knew the real you, they'd be falling over themselves to get your attention, I know it."

Makoto a head tilt or a look, confused by the use of 'deserve'. Kenji deciphers it

"… well a girlfriend makes guys happy, right? I want to see you happy all the time!" Putting both his hands on Makoto's shoulders and shaking him a smidge. "Doesnt it sound fun? Double dates, man, we can hang out all the time!"

Makoto blinks in a thoughtful way, meeting Kenji's eyes. "But I'm already happy, hanging out with you like this. Isn't that enough? We do things together all the time… why do we need anyone else?"

Kenji blinks a bit in surprise. Yeah, he'd never thought of that. He's also really happy around Yuki… is that… ok? For two guys to always hang out alone? Yuki never seems to think it's odd…

Makoto slowly grabs Kenji's hands off of his shoulder, Kenji swears he feels Yuki squeeze them for just a second before a wrapped sandwich is pushed into them.

"Eat, almost time for class. You can't live off ramen forever."

Kenji just nods, unwrapping it and adjusting himself before taking a bite. If Makoto feels just a bit more of their sides touching, he doesn't comment on it

THIS NOW HAS A FINISHED FIC

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twotangledsisters · 2 years ago

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New Dream Appreciation Week Day 7: Life After Happily Ever After

∘⟡˖* Do not repost ∘⟡˖*

Find rambles about the drawing and process of getting here under the read more!

Thanks to @autumn-sundrop, @the-writer1988, @seadrreams for organizing this appreciation week!

I'll admit I was done at this point, but you can't leave it at one to go! Nope, no, no no.

And with some brainstorming, I remembered a chat with a friend to do with the eventual inevitable wedding and decided to do that in this very, background focused piece.

Minor spoilers for Sisters AU waaay down the line in blue.

Differences? Oh, Rapunzel still had her hair? Interesting. I refrain from commenting.

Cassandra is walking her down the isle while Frederic sits with Arianna? If you've read the series, you know why Rapunzel did not want him walking her down to aisle to marry Eugene. Frederic wasn't a good father-in-law for Eugene and Rapunzel STILL holds that against him for some stuff.

Plus, in this AU Cass pretty much raised Rapunzel, it makes sense.

Anyway, enough of that... It's done!

Program: Procreate

Tracked Time: 1 hours and 41 minutes

I do feel like I'm ending on a weak point, but that's normal because I tried (except for Day 2) to do them in order so I'd have the max amount of time. Which means I got more exhausted and they kinda got worse as the days went on?

I think the lesson here is do the first and the lasts ones first so that you can start and end on a high point!

But hey, it's my first time partaking in this sort of community event so it's a learning curve!

I'm just happy I managed to do something for every day.

And I look forward to partaking in more appreciation weeks in this fandom!

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gutterbrat · 28 days ago

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She listens to Kerry with a quiet, grim contemplation as she squints out at the passing river. Cee would have wagered something like this happening, ultimately. Kerry doesn't really want to be without Alo. But Alo was a selfish bastard and Kerry was crashing out from everything —including that. And it's all a sick little symptom of crashing out, isn't it? Alienating yourself from those that you love the most. And with Alo? No amount of love Kerry had for the man could disguise the fact that Alo —more often than not —operated by doing what Alo wanted to do. To add insult to injury, it's not only what Alo wants —more often than not, what Alo wants falls in line with what Claire wants.

And Cee isn't stupid to the intricacies of that. Isn't blind, either, to the fact that Alo's been fucking Kerry up. If anything, it was the main proponent behind why Cee wasn't overall shocked when she'd heard that Kerry'd broken it off. Though, in her mind, she'd only anticipated a string of bad fights, maybe a brief separation —not infidelity, a slow-decaying break-up. But Kerry was crashing out. She knew what that was like. He'd broken up with Alo but he was faring no better for it —worse, actually, if you took into consideration the state of his apartment and the smell of crushed powder clinging to his pores.

She rubs a broad hand over her face, thoughtful. He was gonna leave. I was gonna let him. It sounded likely —Alo, their modern day St. Sebastian with a lance through his chest, paying Kerry one last pitiful visit. She can't help but guess that it was calculated in some way. There wasn't a hint of Alo that appeared ready or able to let Kerry go. Any forceful merging of their paths was dubious, she thinks. Fair to guess.

He's making her chest hurt. He does that. He seems too sad lately, so goddamn small that she can hardly stand it. Normally it's the other way around. Normally Kerry's the one holding her sturdy, pressing kisses to her hairline and making big assurances —stupid fucking jokes. That was their normal. She doesn't know what this is. Ever since Mexico, she isn't sure that there is a normal. Cee's mouth draws thin as she squeezes Kerry to her side, feeling leaden with grief.

I needed to feel like he wanted me. Like I still mattered.

Cee feels stricken by that. Her fingers grip at Kerry's shoulders, and she's craning her head to look at him better. That was the worst kind of feeling. Breaking it off for a good reason but somehow getting the sex in the moment is still better. The love never went anywhere. It's intact, rooted in you like an organ. She makes a soft, displeased sound.

"—Oh dear. You're all fucked up, aren't you." She mutters sympathetically, looking back to the river. Her hand finds placement in his hair, downy and soft —like feathers, some kind of bird that only lived south of the equator. She squeezes the back of his neck affectionately before sighing, dropping her head against his.

Thanks for not judging me.

"Can't judge what I would've done sooner." She chides, peering up at him with a half-grin —the sort that tries to rub off, be infectious. But then her smile fades, and she's serious again. "It's not your fault, though. You know that? It's a fucked up situation. And y'don't just get to choose what makes you feel good, right?" But everyone still ends up suffering for it. She takes the joint between Kerry's fingers and pinches it between the seam of her mouth.

"Anyway. Given' back your key. What an excuse to come over."

Kerry huffs a half-laugh through his nose, dry and humorless. He doesn't take the joint right away. Just watches the way her fingers hover with it, offering. Her question hangs between them—simple, blunt. Was it good?

He blinks slow. He lets his head tip a little more toward her shoulder, lets her warmth anchor him the way nothing else has lately. He doesn’t know how to answer. Doesn’t know how to separate good from regret anymore.

“…Wasn’t supposed to happen,” he says eventually, voice low and caught somewhere between bitter and broken. “He just came to return the keys.”

That’s how it started. Just a knock. Just Alo standing there like the door wasn’t already half-closed in Kerry’s heart.

“He was gonna leave. I was gonna let him.” Kerry scratches at the back of his hand, like the memory itches beneath his skin. “But then he bloody looked at me.”

That look—the one that always meant ruin. Eyes full of apologies that didn’t reach his mouth. That hurt puppy tilt of his head. Like he was already grieving something he hadn’t even asked for back yet. It only took a look.

“And I just—God, I didn’t even ask why. I didn’t ask anything.”

It happened fast. Too fast. Like they’d just picked up in the middle of something unfinished. Bodies reaching before minds could catch up. Kerry remembers the press of the wall at his back, the way his mouth found Alo’s without thought. The way his hands dragged at fabric, desperate to feel something real. Something that still felt theirs.

He had Kerry up against the counter before he could breathe. The memory of it dazed him now. “I let him. I wanted to let him. That’s the part that makes me feel sick, Cee.”

The way he came apart for him so quickly. How his voice broke when Alo touched him. How he didn’t say no, even when he knew they weren’t ready. That it wasn’t healed. That he still hated him in pieces.

His voice falters. “I needed it. I—” He clears his throat, forces the words out. “I needed to feel like he wanted me. Like I still mattered.”

And maybe that’s what hurts most. Because after, Kerry hadn’t felt triumphant or full or satisfied.

He felt small.

He shifts, finally taking the joint again. Doesn’t hit it right away—just lets it burn between his fingers.

His next words come quieter, like they’re meant more for the river than for her. “It was good. Stupid good.”

A pause.

Then: “But the second it was over, I felt like I’d eaten glass.”

He takes a long pull from the joint this time. Holds it in, exhales slowly. He doesn't look at her, not yet. But his voice softens when he speaks again.

“…Thanks for not judging me.”

And he means it. Because most people would.

#punkzombie #gutterbrat — private verse.

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gemstone-roses · 3 years ago

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Safe with me

Eddie munson x reader, Steve harrington x Best friend reader ft robin and nancy) gender neutral!

Summary: you absolutely will not attend any party, never. but when steve throws the biggest celebration after you all successfully defeat vecna, and survive the upside down with just a few broken bones and scrapes,he expects his oldest friend to come, when eddie spots your reluctance to go, he makes it his mission to find out why and to make sure you, his crush, are alright.

Warnings: 18+ only thanku, drinking, reader doesn't drink, previous talk of drink tampering, mentions of anxiety, one conversation hints slightly at a possible sa scenario (but its only slight) Jason being a twat. eddie being the absolute best!.

A:N- comments and reblogs very much appreciated🥺🥺 wasn't sure about this one please be kind 🥺. Eddie munson requests open!

"Alright people, are you all prepared to have the best night of your lives?" Steve clasps his hands together and stares round the room at you, eddie, and nancy. You roll your eyes at him.

"Robins at the house setting up, we should have sufficient amounts of booze and I just had the pool cleaned too" Steve winks at no one in particular.

"Wait, why is Robin setting up your party, at your house?" You asked

"I had to get my hair done" Steve flicks his hair

"Is he fucking serious" you snort, turning to eddie, who shares the same amusement, eddie lightly smacks your thigh and gives it a squeeze

"Steve, you really are something" eddie chuckles, still with his hand on your thigh, and you place your hand on top of his while he talks.

"Your coming, right y/n?" The hope in Steve's voice makes you feel awful but he knows you he knows you don't do parties.

"Um, i-

Eddie's brow furrows at your hesitating

"we, are lucky to be alive and you, deserve to have some fun, so do you know what, this time I'm not taking no for an answer, you don't gotta drink, but please, will you come?" And Steve puts on that stupid adorable face you just can't say no to, and he is right, your all lucky to be alive.

"fineee" you draw out

"yay" Steve says scrunching up his nose

"And nance you owe me 5 dollars, I told you I could get y/n to come" nancy rolls her eyes at him, before shooting you an apologetic look.

"okay, me and nancy are gonna go get ready, but we'll see you two there!" Steve says as they get up to leave.

You sigh once they've left and jump slightly at the voice, forgetting eddie was still here

"You okay?" He turns to you, his face filled with worry and concern

"Yeah, yeah, I'm good" you say, but eddie is not convinced.

"Hey" eddie grabs your chin and tilts it up so your looking at him

Eddie swipes his thumb across your cheek

"you wanna ride?" He asks

"Um yeah that would be brill thankyou" you duck your head, almost feeling like your inconveniencing him

"it's not a problem you" eddie taps your nose, making you smile.

Ever since you'd encountered him at the beginning of the year, you had instantly been taken with the metalhead, of course never telling him how you feel.

"You really didn't have to give me a lift" you mumble as eddie pulls up to Steve's house.

"Are you okay?" Eddie places his hand on your thigh and starts rubbing gently

"Mm, I just, don't normally do parties" Your voice is almost a whisper

" i can tell, but what's on your mind darlin?"

you swallow and let out a breath

"nothing, I'll be fine, come on"

"Stick with me yeah?" Eddie asks

"Eddie, you deserve to have fun, I'll be fine" you say walking up to the house

"Who says I can't have fun with you?" Eddie wraps his arm around you, giddy smile on his face.

"Eddddie, y/n!!" You hear a shout from behind the makeshift bar set up

"are you drunk" you chuckle

"No, I'm robin" she grins

"You want a drink"? She asks the both of you

"No thanks" you say, eddie takes a cup from the table.

"you wanna go sit by the pool?" Eddie asks, arm wrapping back round your waist.

"sure"

You and Eddie grab pool loungers next to each other, eddie pulls his closer, perches on the end, leaning in your direction.

"so, are you enjoying yourself" eddie asks half sarcastically

"to be determined, but the company is enjoyable" you smile

"why thankyou" he mock bows at you before coming back up and winking.

"im gonna grab another drink, you be alright for two minutes?" He asks sincerely, because eddie will stay if you answer no.

"Go on" you chuckle

"Don't go anywhere" he points, twirling on his feet

"Wouldn't dream of it" you half shout back

you miss his presence as soon as he's gone.

"Y/n"! Steve shouts and plops down on Eddie's chair.

"steve" you nod

"Are you having fun?" He asks

"Yes" you say unconvincingly

"did something happen? Is someone pressuring you to get drunk? Because if they did ill -"steve's mood turns very serious for a moment.

"No no nothing like that, you know ive not been out like this since and it's just bit much that's all" Steve reaches out to give your arm a comforting tap

"im really glad you came y/n" he smiles, before getting up.

"Hey"

"You took your time" you say, but you didn't know eddie had been quick actually, he'd been standing behind you, not eavesdropping but just being polite letting you finish your conversation with Steve.

"I got you a soda" he hands you the cup and shit because now your gonna have to either be rude or explain and you'd like to do neither of them things.

"thanks" you smile,but you make no move to drink it,placing it under your seat.

Eddie senses your apprehension

"I didn't put anything in it, I promise, you can trust me" eddie chuckles.

You sigh

"I do trust you eddie, it's everyone else" you say quietly.

Eddie bites his lip

"you know, I wasn't spying or anything but I overheard a bit of your conversation with Steve" eddie grabs your hand, linking his fingers with yours.

You look up at him and jesus those eyes

"Come on, talk to me love" eddie squeezes your hand

"it's alright, your safe with me" he encouraged

fuck how could one person be so kind and caring?

"alright" you inhale, " the last time I went out, with nancy, she was in charge of getting us drinks and even though she asked for one to be non alcoholic, jason didnt give a fuck and just gave her two alcoholic drinks, he did it all night"

Eddie squeezes your hand tighter, his body tenses up at your words.

"Was , was he just being an absolute dick head with no regard for anyone but himself or-

You can tell what he's getting at because thinking about what could have happened sometimes kept you up at night.

"I don't know" you interrupt. "Nancy noticed something wasn't right and took me home". You say.

"oh jesus, 'm so sorry" eddie says, rubbing his jaw before pulling you into a hug and you can feel the love and warmth radiating from him as he holds you.

"You wanna get out of here, go for a walk?" He asks

"Yeah, but where are we going?"

"Come on" he tugs at you

"Eddddie"

"You'll see" he smirks

You walk for a bit before coming across the only shop open at this time.

Eddie turns to you with a stupid grin on his face.

"Can't have my darlin going thirsty all night can we?" And your face is a picture, and Eddie would capture that moment and imprint it on his brain forever, the moment your face softens, realising just how thoughtful he is, the moment your face contorts in confusion before lighting up when you realise he said date.

"date?" your voice fails to hide your utter happiness at his comment.

"Yeah,if that's what you want, of course" eddie rubs the back of his neck, shy all of a sudden, waiting.

He takes the bright smile lighting up your face as a yes.

#eddie munson imagine #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson fanfic #stranger things imagine #steve harrington x reader #platonic steve harrington x reader #eddie munson x gn reader #eddie munson hurt/comfort #eddie fanfic #eddie x reader #eddie munson comfort

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the-hydroxian-artblog · 3 years ago

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I understand of course that there's no artistic shortcuts, and that the only way to learn to do a thing is to practice it a bunch.

But man, every time I see your art on my dash, some part of my wishes I could flip a switch and just mimic that style in one go. How long does it generally take you to do any of your random sketches? And do you have any advice for nailing the sort of. Casual dynamic style you do so well.

Most sketches of just a pose and a half take me anywhere from 25 minutes to an hour, mostly depending on both how detailed the character is, and how ambitious/inspired I'm feeling to draw them.

It's as you said, hard to recommend anything other than "practice", but I detailed my study regimen here. Something I hear is useful but don't do myself is straight up tracing sketches of other artists (for your eyes only, don't go posting them and making claims), mainly to learn and improve your own muscle memory and "get in their head". I've only done that very sporadically as inking practice. That's not me saying it isn't a good idea, I just haven't built up the habit. Feel free to do that with my own work, by the way!

Either way, my "casual dynamic style" comes from honing my eye and muscle memory to the point where I can draw poses more efficiently and visualize them, which my daily study regimen helped me hone. When you "get" to where I am, you'll find that there's only more to learn, though. Think of speedrunners; someone being better than even 90% of players looks impressive, but once you hone your skill to that point, you'll realize there's 10 times as much distance between you and the guy that's better than 93% of players. People who shoot for world records, being the best of the best, wind up making thousands more attempts than others lower on the ladder ever will.

The biggest takeaway is that you shouldn't be expecting yourself to be all that satisfied at any point, IF you aren't drawing something you enjoy. DALL-E 2 images look impressive and even incredible, but after a while the novelty begins to wear off. Training your neural pathways to make better and better art works the same way; you actually dampen your ability to get a dopamine hit off of good art alone, so you try to make it better, and eventually you grow only somewhat satisfied with your new normal. You need to draw stuff that actually makes you happy. That's the sort of thing that will fuel your journey for real. It's why art quality seems to not really matter all that much on social media, as it's work that the viewer and artist relates with that often winds up getting any traction. It's not a great analogy as all art has inherent value, but some kinds of art is definitely more motivating to draw and engage with than other kinds.

It's also why I draw stupid shit all the time. I get more of a dopamine hit drawing stupid shit that scratches an itch. Maybe your thing is cats. Shipping characters. Trains. Buildings. Find something you can't easily get tired of drawing, and study it as often as you can. Not too much to burn you out, but enough that you don't mind taking the challenge again and again. Don't rush it, just study a small amount at regular intervals. It's as David Karp once said: It doesn't matter how slow you go so long as you do not stop.

#littlestartemis #FAQ

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scrollsfromarebornrealm · 2 years ago

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quiet yearning

She didn't know how to explain it. It was a pull...a draw unlike anything she had ever felt before. And it didn't make sense. Yet Zero found herself continuing to wander into the orbit of Riven and her fellows.

Simple curiosity, she tried to tell herself. It wasn't because of hunger--that had been more than sated ever since her arrival on the Source. She was just curious, that was all.

And then Garlamald happened. She had almost died--a final and complete death. But she hadn't been alone. Riven and the others had come to help her. Saved her. They'd learned what Golbez was plotting. And Zero...

The fire still burned inside her, even now. Another thing she didn't understand. And it would be so much easier to return to her normal--to only work in bargains. Stay within the lines. But Zero didn't want to. Everything was now chaotic, messy.

Colorful.

"Do you want something?" Zero was jolted out of her inner musings and back to reality. She was in the kitchen of Sunward, Riven's personal home in...U'ldah, it was called.

"What?"

"Do you want me to make you something to eat?" Sebastian repeated. Zero blinked at the question.

"I..." Her eyes roamed the kitchen, taking in the fruit, herbs, the fresh-baked bread that was cooling on a nearby table, the ingredients Sebastian had taken out for whatever he was planning on making. A mound of fluffy pancakes was on the table near her, golden brown and dripping with butter. A kettle was bubbling as the water inside it boiled, and another machine was steaming as a dark brown liquid slowly dripped out into a pot that had been placed beneath it.

"I...wouldn't know what to ask for." Zero admitted. Sebastian pondered this statement, then started to flip pages in the recipe book.

"Here, I'll fix you something simple." He said. A thought occurred to Zero.

"It won't have fire in it, will it?"

"Fire?" Sebastian repeated, then the light dawned. "Oooh, like the...no. It won't be spicy." He set about gathering items--milk, eggs, several slices of the freshly-baked bread. Zero watched him carefully--this was the first time she'd really been alone with the hyur. He wasn't like Riven and the others, he was more...quiet. Reserved. His aether wasn't as...colorful or chaotic--there was Light there, a unholy amount of it, Zero sensed. But then there was elemental magic, a smell of gunpowder that always seemed to linger, and...

"What are the golden lines in your left arm?"

"What?"

"There are..." Zero tilted her head. "Golden lines in your upper left arm. They don't go very far, but they're there." She watched as Sebastian went very silent, moving his right hand to just graze the skin directly over the lines Zero had pointed out.

"A plan that went very, very wrong on the First." He answered.

"The world that was broken by Light." Zero responded. Sebastian nodded.

"Those are...scars of the corrupted Light that I was infected with." His voice was soft. "It was purged, but this remained. And not just myself either. Riven and the others have their own markings."

"...Why are you with them?" Zero asked. "You...don't seem like...their type." Now it was Sebastian's turn to blink, and he turned around.

"Their type?" He repeated.

"Loud. Annoying. Nosy. Get into everything." Zero stopped as Sebastian started to laugh.

"Was what I said a jest?"

"No, you're not wrong! I didn't think I stood out that much--though...I'm not loud, but I am nosy, annoying, and get into everything." Sebastian chortled. He faced Zero, his lips twitching in a grin.

"I suppose you can say that we all share the same desire. We want to explore. Help people. Just because we're different doesn't mean we can't have similar wants and goals." He began.

"And...we're family. Not by the water of the womb, but by the blood we've shed in trying to protect each other. I've put myself in harm's way for Riven, Augustine, Mathye and Reinhardt, and they've all done the same for me at one time or another. We've supported each other through difficult times. I consider them the brothers and little sister I never had."

"Family." Zero said quietly. "You truly consider them as such?"

"I do." Sebastian answered. "I love them as such, and would do anything for them, to keep them safe. Even die for them." To that Zero had no response, hiding her eyes with the brim of her hat as she thought.

"Family." She repeated, her voice soft. Could that explain the burning feeling inside her?

#ffxiv #ffxiv zero #sebastian astralyas #zero with Riven and the Bro Squad #give it up Zero you've been adopted

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bizarropurugly · 12 days ago

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this is unironically some of the most hostile and nastiest shit I've ever seen being done by a bunch of people who are supposedly my own age

I'm sitting here spiraling and cutting myself and constantly having panic attacks and all kinds of shit because of these people accusing me of shit and cutting me out of a community I felt safe and welcomed in

and what do they do?

listen to me talk about something I was incredibly afraid of and then do just that and not even give a shit enough to tell me what I even did wrong I had to learn from a third party and even then,

well

maybe I just wasn't liked, which has also been burrowing in my skin like a porcupine quill. all over me. eating at me like those fake scarabs in the mummy. hollowing me out until I wanted so badly to go to the fucking psych ward again but aha! american insurance be like, oh you weren't LITERALLY going to kys so why should we help pay for this?

I heard about what they've been doing to people, in the shadows, and I think, oh maybe misinterpreted, maybe something I don't know, giving some level of benefit of the doubt

fucking

I had a g-d damn panic attack and triggered by the stupid ass guild tag some people have from this place

I disappeared for two fucking months over the celebration for some fucking character and the continued paranoia, fear, hurt, betrayal, and complete, utter, dedicated belief that nobody has ever liked or wanted me or enjoyed my presence in my fucking life

the nightmares I've had. the disembowelment of my fucking desire and will to create.

my trust and belief in people wasn't just broken, I was absolutely soul-shattered.

it shredded open old wounds, including ones I didn't even know I had. I was mauled. I am a stained glass window that was knocked out by a sledge hammer with a smile, like some HGTV nightmare

and they have the NERVE

to pull shit like this

like, I was told what this message was about, and what if this wasn't ashes's username?? how many people was this message sent to? who is on the shit list that is getting more shite accused of them? because I had to fuckin have this explained to me, like this just sounded like normal name-calling until I was told. some fucking, "everyone is ashes" paranoia, over someone who has done nothing but, what? draw the wrong way? enjoy the wrong things? be neurodivergent the wrong way?

the massive amount of ableism these people display is horrendous. for a story that is supposed to feature neurospicy characters, it sure seems like the only type of neurodivergent these people thinks exists is to be a manipulative, hostile, cruel, antagonistic, non-communicative and "inherently evil" antithesis to mankind.

the amount of hostility this group slings towards people for not understanding something, for having different trauma, for having different triggers, for having different coping mechanisms, for having different anything is un-fucking-acceptable for a bunch of g-d damned 30-year-olds.

the amount of abuse I've seen them both commit and defend is vile. I might as well have walked into a fucking asylum in the 1800s with the way these people have acted.

the way these people don't even believe this type of shit is abuse, that verbal and emotional abuse isn't REAL, unless it is levied at them by *checks notes* making art the wrong way and relating incorrectly to events and characters

you're monsters

you're all just fucking monsters

you tell systems they aren't allowed to exist

you tell people they can't have autism because you simply don't like them

you accuse them of doing shit they haven't and refuse to explain

you let your little pets and friends trigger other people, sometimes on fucking purpose, and see no issues

you think people with personality disorders are automatically out to get you and cause harm to others

you think constantly bringing up someone's PTSD triggers isn't abusive

you think belittling others isn't abusive

you tell people they're not allowed to exist because idfk you have a character they mimic as "secret" - except you've posted pictures of him numerous g-d damn times

you think because you "have jewish friends" you can't be told you're wrong about a "judeo-christian calendar" like what the fuck, it's gregorian you fucking mook. jews use a different calendar entirely. and you tried to argue with a jew telling you this.

and you have this weird fucked up obsession with violating consent in your writing - making characters actually trap someone and ignore their fucking NO, making characters DRUG OTHERS to make them more compliant for adult activities... and you think that's hot, and then have the nerve to sling darts accusing others of violating a boundary that... you know what? I'm saying it: that is actually fucking unreasonable. why the fuck do you get to dictate what others do in a private space? THAT YOU WERE ORIGINALLY INVITED TO, for that matter. YOU CHOSE not to participate and then you complained you couldn't see it and that "made you anxious".

youtube

like damn bitch I have taped paper to my windows before and currently have little to no desire to go outside because I'm afraid of being perceived, I fucking thought I was being spied on because your story brought up MTG when I had been uploading my collection as part of trying to calm tf down from the constant panic attacks caused by this whole thing.... but that's some top tier dipshit ass paranoia. dipshit ass because "I'm worried people are doing things in that place that I refuse to join so now nobody is allowed to do things".

(but let's not forget you let people post actual, full-on porn if you like their art. grow up.)

and again I keep saying this, but the fuckin nerve y'all have for saying shit like this, after you said you can be approached and confided in and have an open-door policy for your ticket system, then turning around and use things you were told in confidence to make personal attacks on people. like. really personal.

ooo but bringing up someone's fucking dead brother and constantly accusing them of being violent, evil, and a monster, constantly intentionally antagonizing them and calling them stupid, you think that's FINE and NOT ABUSIVE. (explanation under cut)

you're paranoid? GOOD. I hope you are. I hope you fret yourself to sleepless nights over people talking where you can't see or hear them. I hope you think people are, in fact, stalking you. because it'd be nice for what you do to others to actually happen to you.

y'all have no right to act like this fandom in a fandom in a fandom has any level of welcoming to it. you are cruel, controlling, and hostile. step out of line and get banned. oh, it's your space, sure, but that's the thing - it is so controllingly, belligerently your space that it's not safe for anyone else. you very pointedly try to break people constantly on a fucking whim.

what's wrong with you all? fix your fucking hearts.

and PS you have no idea what rural america is like, "the greys", or the inside of an abandoned textile mill.

And if you ban people trying to figure out who is involved in this discussion that people are having, privately, because your server is completely unsafe to speak openly in then you're literally proving that is, in fact, the case

and yeah, people talk, just like you all circle jerk each other making fun of all the people in your server. let me repeat that:

THE SERVER MODS, ADMINS, FRIEND GROUP, ALL TALK ABOUT AND MAKE FUN OF THE PEOPLE WHO JOIN THE SERVER.

I'm curious as to why it is so important for you to join that server through alts after you were banned? Is it cathartic or are you just hoping for some attention? I saw those DMs by the way, looks like you are a mean boschbitch for real. Hope you recover from your 'being mean and disruptive is my hobby' disease.

#turns out when you treat people like shit #sometimes people out your ass #people my age acting like they're half my age #all the shit they do is shit I grew tf out of 10+ years ago #the irony being that this behaviour is such a fucking mirror of what happened to me at 15-18 like #now I'm going to go throw the fuck up because all this shit has been making me taste iron on a regular basis #Youtube

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pocketfulofrecs · 4 years ago

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Dee - So! We have a little game in our discord server where writers write a fic together, blindly, without any plot. One writer starts a thread, other follows up, and then another joins in. Our first run produced the story you see below. It was a game between @auspiciouscandy, @whiteflowercrimsonparasol (or justdoityoufucker) and myself or @vrishchikawrites.

We thought it should be shared with everyone. That's why Ju and I decided to start a new section on Pocketful called Storytime with Bunnies. We'll publish all stories that we write there on Pocketful and eventually on Ao3.

Personally, it was a great deal of fun and I'm so happy that we're continuing it! I hope you like the story! It was written by three people and still turned out so smooth!

-------

A Strange Encounter

by Vrishchika, justdoityoufucker, and auspiciouscandy

-------

It is dark, but Wei Ying has never been afraid of darkness.

The juniors shuffle nervously behind him, sticking so close to his back, he can feel the warmth of their bodies. Suddenly, there is a noise - loud in the silence of the night and out of place. Wei Ying clutches Chengqing tightly, ready to strike. He turns in the direction of the noise only to suck in a sharp breath and try to suppress the sigh threatening to overtake him.

He’d mostly been following the juniors, letting them take the lead to hunt the nest of low-level yao that had been terrorizing the small mountain town. They’d done well, so far, and had dealt with half of the yao without incident. The problem started when they’d run into a higher-level yao, which was to be expected given his luck on night hunts, but he hadn’t expected to see a strange man.

He seems almost as tall as Chifeng-zun had been; Wei Ying can't see his features clearly, but his instincts warn him to be cautious. The man says nothing as he steps forward. He doesn't have a corpse's stiff gait. Each step brings him closer and reveals more of him. Pale skin, dark eyes, lips as red as blood, almost unnaturally still features.

His beauty is disarming, but Wei Ying is unmoved. He's married to the most beautiful man in existence, after all. But he is curious. What is this strange, beautiful man doing in the middle of the woods? And while he looks the man over, cautious of any sharp movement the man could make, he steps forward. Though contrary to his beautiful appearance, his body is but a corpse and it is difficult to hide when he staggers and what appears to be his arm drops down onto the floor. Wei Ying hears someone gagging behind him, but he cannot take his eyes off the man; every instinct in his body is screaming about the danger in front of them.

Just when he is about to speak, the man's face changes to a look of pained horror, a look that the stiffness of a corpse shouldn't be able to achieve. There is something about the way his jaw moves, that makes it seem as if he was trying to speak, but no sound leaves his red, red lips.

"Stop," Wei Ying says, putting the force of his cultivation into the word. The corpse's mouth opens even wider, and Wei Ying senses it before anything, "Cover your ears!" he shouts, but it is too late, there are some indistinguishable whispers he catches before his hands reach his ears, and he doubts any of the juniors were fast enough even as he hears their swords immediately drop to the floor.

He wracks his brain to match the odd corpse with any of the descriptions he remembers from his studies and it suddenly clicks into place. He remembers tales of bewitching creatures. Beings that can ensnare and seduce with their voice and their beauty. Beings that can control the living mind as Wei Ying controls corpses. He remembers tales of how cultivators of immense strength would drop their swords and simply submit to these creatures, allowing them to consume their Qi without protest.

His eyes flicker towards his juniors, alarm stirring in his chest. What can he do? Think. Think, Wei Ying!

And he reaches a conclusion, the corpse uses its voice to control, to influence, and had Wei Ying not used his own to do the same? Resentful energy and spiritual energy are almost similar, it's risky, but there isn't much else to do. He already perceives the juniors trying to walk past him, and he is overcome with waves after waves of compulsion from his small amount of exposure, so Wei Ying does the only thing he can think of.

He gathers the power towards his throat. His voice laced with command, he opens his mouth and sings not a real tune, at first, but simply unbridled power that cuts off the corpse's control over the juniors.

But he cannot just wrest control; he needs to suppress the corpse, and that takes more than random notes. He slides into a familiar song, lyrics that Lan Zhan shared but have never been sung before in deference to their usual duets. The juniors have never heard Wei-qianbei sing before; they have heard his tuneful humming, whistling, and music, but not his true singing voice. It renders them silent. Wei Ying's voice is resonant and it bounces off the surrounding trees and rocks, becoming amplified. The effect is otherworldly, unlike anything they have ever experienced.

It halts the strange creature in his tracks. He sways dazedly. Something about the expression is almost covetous.

Wei Ying hears Sizhui whisper his name in worry. He is his father's son and has somehow inherited all of Hanguang-jun's protectiveness. Even now, he takes a shaky step forward to stand before Wei Ying. But there's no reason he should worry; Wei Ying's control over his power is absolute, his control over the corpse-creature the same.

He changes the intent of his power, the tone of his singing, to lure the creature to lower its guard and step closer. He trusts that Sizhui knows what to do, that the other juniors will assist as his voice lulls it into submission. The creature stumbles forward, his hand stretched out towards Wei Ying. He sways with every step and Wei Ying tracks his movements carefully.

"Good boy," he croons, maintaining a singing tone in his voice, "Whatever shall we do with you?"

The corpse's hand is still outstretched and his expression is still mesmerized. Wei Ying reaches out and closes his fingers around the hand, keeping his voice mellow and soothing. "You're a strong one, aren't you?" he sings, ignoring Sizhui's alarmed noise.

The corpse will only need to twist his grip to break Wei Ying's arm but something tells him he's safe. He leans forward, curious, "Wei Ying," and Wei Ying freezes. He doesn't let off his control but it is enough for the corpse to pull him closer, a hand reaching up to caress his hair—he is aware of the gasped whispers by the juniors of, 'Hanguang-jun,' the juniors who were just beginning to take control—but this is something out of his expectation. A normally high-level corpse of this type would be troublesome on its own, but one that could mimic?

The danger levels have increased far more than what juniors can handle; Wei Ying pivots in his singing, pulls Sizhui behind him and crowds back, keeping the juniors behind him. He pauses, for the barest moment, to say, "Flare."

That snaps Sizhui to action, and as Wei Ying resumes singing, voice louder and louder, he draws a flare out of his robes and sets it off, the sparkling blue of the fireworks temporarily catching the creature's attention, making Wei Ying snap forward and cup the corpse's face, physically drawing his attention back towards him.

It is intimate, the way he angles his body and draws the creature in. Something burns in him. He has never touched anyone but his Lan Zhan like this, with so much tenderness.

The creature that mimics his husband's voice seems to mimic his affection too. Wei Ying cringes as cold fingers trace his cheek, trailing dangerously close to his neck. One slip, and Wei Ying could potentially lose his life.

"Wei Ying," The corpse whispers in his husband's voice, and something dark stirs within him. His lips twitch into an alluring smile and Wei Ying has his hand slowly reaching up and caressing its cold skin. He thinks the eyes shimmer an amber shade, for they are nowhere near the molten gold of his husband’s. He's all too aware of this cheap imitation's intent and responds in kind.

Wei Ying ignores the yells of his nephew, the sound of another flare going up into the night sky; his hand is coated in resentful energy as it reaches the back of the corpse's neck, and he maintains eye contact with it, his voice softer to only reach the corpse.

It is completely enamoured, that is why when Wei Ying makes a hand sign to the juniors to tell them to leave, the creature doesn't react. It is like a careful, possessive lover, but, unlike his husband, there is no real care behind its actions as it closes in on him. The resentful energy on Wei Ying's hands increases, solidifies, a black, hateful knife.

When he drives it directly into the corpse-creature's neck, spearing it up into its skull, the creature makes a weak, pained groan in that facsimile of his husband's voice, and Wei Ying shouldn't feel the way he does—it is but a creature who had taken up the face of his beloved—but to hear the wounded noises it makes, trying to garner his sympathy, Wei Ying cannot help but feel that sympathy. Wei Ying should know that the hands around his neck are the ones that wouldn't hesitate to kill him, so very cold, lacking his husband's warmth.

He raises his voice, and sings a sharp tune, and the corpse whines once more before it’s rendered mute, opening its mouth wide with a final hissed, “Wei Ying!”

Wei Ying's eyes widen because, for a second, before he tightens his hands, he catches a glimpse of his husband, pain and grief on his face that he hasn't seen in years. The corpse falls, its weakness stabbed through, unable to move again and Wei Ying shudders, feeling so incredibly off-kilter.

He needs to see Lan Zhan. Lan Zhan is fine, he's sure, but the look on the creature's face, the timbre of its voice--it's almost enough to overwhelm.

The juniors, still near enough to catch the sudden silence, creep back through the trees, worried looks on their faces as they take in the look on their teacher's face, the still form of the corpse-creature on the ground.

"Xian-gege?" Sizhui starts, clearly shaken if he's reverted to that form of address. He continues forward as if to grasp Wei Ying's shoulder, but Wei Ying needs a moment. Maybe it is the leftover effects of the corpse, maybe it is his own fears and concerns.

But he takes in a sharp breath and pulls his mouth into a smile, "Now then, shouldn't we return? I assume none of you are hurt?" He looks them over, ignoring the sneaked glances from the dazed juniors as they stand up on their shaking legs, "Come along now—" he places his hand on top of Sizhui's, which shakes almost unnoticeably.

Sizhui wants to reassure him, but he knows already that Wei-qianbei wouldn't feel comforted until he lays his eyes on Hanguang-jun. Sizhui has seen enough of their love to know this is one of the few things that can rattle his indomitable Xian-gege. If anything happens to Hanguang-jun, Wei-qianbei would—

Sizhui draws his mind away from grim thoughts and watches as Wei-qianbei steps forward to the body, pulling out his qiankun pouch. Suddenly, there's a twitch of movement from nearby. As if called by Wei Ying and Lan Sizhui's thoughts, the austere white of Lan Zhan's robes appears, and he comes to a graceful halt near the corpse-creature.

"Lan Zhan," Wei Ying can't help but exhale in relief, "We're fine."

Hanguang-jun casts a look at the corpse-creature, then back at Wei Ying. He looks over Wei Ying completely before turning his gaze towards the juniors while moving towards Wei Ying, almost a split second of a glance but enough to know they're fine; it wouldn't have been noticed if Sizhui hadn't been looking for it. Then, he reaches up to caress Wei Ying’s face and Wei Ying melts into it, feeling the warmth seep into his skin.

"Wei Ying," Wei Ying can't describe how relieved he feels when the familiar scent of sandalwood envelopes him. It takes but a glance for Lan Zhan to see past his welcoming smile and glimpse the truly shaken core of him.

"Go forth, Sizhui, we'll join you soon." Lan Zhan commands and Wei Ying almost protests. He doesn't want the children away from him. Lan Zhan just shakes his head and pulls him close, "Breathe, center yourself."

Wei Ying presses his forehead to Lan Zhan's shoulder and sighs. Lan Zhan is here. Lan Zhan is safe, solid, and strong. That's all he cares about, and he feels his arms encircling him so he completely rests his weight upon his husband, his head on Lan Zhan's chest, hearing his heartbeat go thump thump thump.

He feels the earlier fight leaving his body as he relaxes against him, matching their breaths together. Wei Ying wants to stay there with him, the forest trees and the silence that was eerie and offsetting earlier feels serene and calming. But they can’t, because they have to get back, everyone in need of rest, the kids in need of checking to see if they're all actually okay.

Then there's the issue of the corpse-creature; research will need to be done when they are back in Cloud Recesses, to figure out what it is and if there might be more. Wei Ying breathes in the sandalwood scent of his husband, then steps away, qiankun pouch in hand. The corpse is where it had fallen, and he kneels next to it, Lan Zhan a comforting presence next to him.

"Aiya," He says, "They tried but couldn't get close to your perfection, Lan Zhan."

His husband huffs but keeps a steady, warm hand on his back. It is a reassuring presence that makes it easier to examine the body. Wei Ying runs his eyes along the tall body, mind stirring, "Who could be behind this?" How and why did they mimic Lan Zhan of all people? Wei Ying can't help but feel concerned. Lan Zhan hums in response but offers no commentary; he's probably still in a protective, vigilant state. Wei Ying smiles fondly and kisses him on his cheek, "let's return then,” he says, and gets up after putting it away.

Lan Zhan pulls him closer to himself; maybe he knows what worried Wei Ying as he keeps a comforting presence by his side. They walk to the Juniors standing ahead, who stop their whispers as soon as they get close. Wei Ying looks them over once again. They look at him with a slightly dazed look, but are steady on their feet. Wei Ying frowns, maybe it's the effects of leftover energy?

Jin Ling starts to say something about heading back to Jinlintai. As if Wei Ying would let him! It's almost midnight, and the night hunt has taken them to the far reaches of Gusu-Lan territory, a long trip of a couple days to Lanling-Jin territory. "None of that," Wei Ying chides, feeling like himself again. "Back to the village for all of us; Hanguang-jun needs to make sure there are no lingering effects."

Jin Ling half-scowls, but doesn't deny or try to argue back, and there's a blur as Sizhui all but pulls Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji into a hug. Jin Ling sees Sizhui’s shoulders shake slightly and he looks away. Terrifying situation or not, that illusion had felt all too real. It was as if it were Hanguang-jun standing before them, the mannerism, the voice, how he...he—

Before he can think more he feels a pull at his wrist and he feels the warmth of another person around him. He hears Jingyi make a startled noise as the other two are also pulled into a clustered little group hug. Jin Ling’s face flushes red and he opens his mouth to protest but doesn't push them away.

“You're safe,” Wei Ying says, as the teens start to pull away after a few moments. If a few of them have reddened eyes, or barely-there tear tracks down their cheeks, neither he nor Lan Zhan mention it.

"Aiya," he gives Sizhui an extra pat on the head, a smile finally pulling at his face as he takes in the juniors' despondent looks. "What is all this? I would think someone died if I came upon you all like this! Come now, back to the village.”

"Wei Ying!" Lan Zhan calls suddenly and Wei Ying doesn't understand why. He looks up at his husband, only to see his eyes shining with concern, perhaps even some panic.

"What? Lan Zha—"

An abrupt wave of dizziness overcomes him and he falters, feeling something dripping down his nose. He touches his upper lip shakily, his limbs starting to feel heavy. His vision swims and Lan Zhan catches him immediately as he sways forward. Something cold is settling within him. "Lan Zhan," he croaks. His vision is turning black from the corner of his eyes, and Lan Zhan is saying something but he can't hear it, it’s muffled and sounds so far away.

Wei Ying hates the feeling that floods him, the wave of cold dread that he hasn't felt in a long time. His hair stands up as he feels ghosts of the touches. They linger on the back of his neck, his face, his arms where the corpse had touched him, among the distant noises, he hears a clear, sharp "Wei Ying," but it sounds so odd, so unfamiliar despite it being his husband’s voice and that's when he crumples, losing all control of his limbs.

The cheer and safety of mere moments before has fled, and Wei Ying can't stamp out the panic that grips him as his breath hitches. He's vaguely aware, as if he is not truly in possession of his own body anymore, that his sweet husband, his Lan Zhan, has pulled his body up into his arms.

That awareness lessens even more as Lan Zhan's distant, warped voice sends out some sharp commands, and then he feels the slap of wind on his face and something isn't right. His senses are fading but he has practiced dual cultivation with Lan Zhan for several years now. He's intimately familiar with his husband's core. Something isn't right because—

—they're running. The wind is against his face. He remembers the trapped look of despair. His husband commands the children but something isn't right. He's leaving something behind. The arms carrying him are familiar but recognition slips him and he becomes increasingly aware as a sharp pain increases from his arm and he gasps, because it feels as if fire is under his skin, it moves from his arm and reaches up to his neck and it increases. Wei Ying has always had a large tolerance to pain, but he is in little control and he cannot stop himself as he lets out a pained scream, the wind feels faster as Lan Zhan—

—not right, not right, not right—

—he wakes up to the dark wood and white paint of the Cloud Recesses. He does not move, cataloging his body, the sensations, what he remembers. There was an oppressive feeling of pain, of wrongness, that is now mostly gone. Did they fly back? How long has it been?

He feels like he's forgetting something, forgetting; he thinks it over, the body, the pain, and reaches up his arm and sure enough, there are bright red marks, beginning from his arm, spreading out like spilled ink on paper, they resemble a spiders web as they crawl upwards, up along until they disappear into his clothes and he had no doubt they reach till his neck. What about his face? He reaches up to try and touch but before he can, the door slides open as Lan Zhan steps through.

Wei Ying's entire focus shifts towards the Second Jade. Lan Zhan looks pristine as always, calm like nothing can disturb him. His movements are steady, unhurried. He sets his things aside and walks into the Jingshi casually. There's no trace of urgency or worry in him. Wei Ying feels his heart grow cold. His Lan Zhan wouldn't have been as calm, nor would his Lan Zhan look at him the way it did, unmoving and—the same way that thing had.

"Lan Zhan" comes and sits by his bed, eyes lock over him, dark and amber. "Wei Ying," he—it—reaches up a hand, and cradles his cheek, the same way his husband did. Except, its thumb inches towards lips and it is colder than ice. Wei Ying acts unbothered, showing a soft smile as he puts his hand over the one on his face.

"I'm fine, Lan Zhan!" he says softly. The suspicion grows when he remembers the red veining on his body, when he realizes that the touch isn't as tangible as it should be.

Touching the creature's hand feels like holding a dust mote, and he abruptly realizes that he isn't sure if this even is the Jingshi. It is the same pristine colors, of course, but their possessions seem blurred, as if only half-existing. There is no familiar, comforting scent of sandalwood. Is it an illusion? A dream? Is this creature a figment of his imagination? Or is it something else? He tries to access his core and can't grasp anything. He tries to summon resentful energy but it slips through his fingers like water. His only choice is to get information.

"What happened?" he asks in a soft tone he reserves for his husband. He angles his body to be welcoming, like he would with Lan Zhan. None of his actions give any indication of his suspicions. "Are the children safe?"

Lan Zhan nods, "They're safe. Lan Xichen is looking after them and a healer is examining them. You are the only one to be harmed. We do not know the nature of your injuries—" Verbose. Too verbose. Lan Xichen, not xiongzhang or Xichen. Even his imagination wouldn't conjure an illusion so inaccurate. This isn't just a simple case of his mind making things up.

The last thing he remembers is Lan Zhan, his Lan Zhan sending waves of spiritual energy and holding him close, so he can rest assured his body is safe. The hand slips from his cheek, as the "Lan Zhan"—no, the corpse, raises his chin making him look directly at it.

"What is Wei Ying thinking of?" it croons and Wei Ying looks away from it, and bites his lip as way of disguising his eyes roaming over the interior of the Jingshi, now that he looks carefully, the arrangement of the bed, the dresser, everything is out of order—the hand on his chin tightens, "Wei Ying, I'm right here."

The meaning is subtle, and Wei Ying turns to it, his expression as if hesitant, "I..I'm worried about the kids.." he takes on a concerned expression, not entirely faked, "Can you take me to see them?"

A pulse of Lan Zhan's--his Lan Zhan's spiritual energy abruptly floods him, and then is gone. It is a miracle he is able to keep his expression level and unbothered by it, but he's beginning to put the pieces together. He needs to keep the creature distracted, talking.

"Wei Ying," the creature wearing Lan Zhan's body says, almost chiding, "they need their rest, and you need your own rest. I am here with you; do not worry about them for the time being.”

Wei Ying knows it isn't the right time to push. He decides on a different approach, "You know how I get when there's a mystery to solve, Lan Zhan!" he protests with a playful smile, "You can't expect me to rest without any explanation? What happened? How did I get hurt? What did the healers say?" Simple questions, things he would've asked Lan Zhan in any case.

There's a lingering heat of Lan Zhan's qi swirling around within him, too weak to actually heal him or bring him out of this state, but enough to sharpen his perception and remove his pain. He knows his husband is trying to save him and there's no person more capable than his Lan Zhan. Something in him settles at that. Let Lan Zhan work from the outside to resolve the situation. Wei Ying will work from the inside to get more information.

The expression that crosses the corpse's face, of being caught off-guard, seems so foreign on Lan Zhan's face, but it composes itself and lets go of his chin, and seems to contemplate before deciding on an expression of utmost gentleness and care. "This," it says, as it reaches to touch the back of his neck, where one of the webbings must be, "is a mark of possession." A hint of darkness, desire, flashes in its eyes, "It means Wei Ying's qi has been flooded with another’s—" Wei Ying tenses, but the corpse has no suspicion in its eyes, meaning it was referring to that moment in the forest—"and Wei Ying is one of the few who have been able to reject it, so these," it reaches down to his arm, tracing over the red, "remain as a reminder." It looks enthralled, pleased even.

And Wei Ying feels his lips press flat. "I don't like them at all!" He pretends to whine, shows how he absolutely abhors the idea of it, feeling satisfied when it frowns in displeasure. "I don't like any marks other than the ones Lan Zhan makes,” he adds, looking at the corpse through his lashes.

Its facade almost slips, with the anger appearing on its face, and Wei Ying fights back a smug smile when another rush of his husband's warm spiritual energy wraps around him. The corpse-creature's face blurs for a moment, with that rush of qi, but then resettles. It looks distinctly displeased, though it tries to mask the expression with one of fondness that looks laughably fake. Wei Ying does not laugh.

"If my Lan Zhan wanted to make some marks," Wei Ying says coyly, trailing off in a suggestive manner. The creature seems to freeze and flicker, as if it is wholly unsure of what to do with that. And Wei Ying pulls back just as the corpse makes a hesitant hand gesture and says, softly, "Of course I'm joking Lan Zhan, you know your Wei Ying, I can't relax until I see the kids, and—" he adds seeing it fume "—you too, I know you're worried about them but they're strong! So they'll be fine!"

Wei Ying finishes his 'assurance' and Lan Zhan succeeds. There's a towering surge of qi coursing through him, ready to pull him back, his to command. By now, he is so familiar with his husband's qi that he can use it as his own. He sees how it makes the creature's eyes widen and falter. He smiles coyly, tapping his chin as the binds holding him to this place snap one by one.

"Now, who are you, my dear friend?" he asks as Lan Zhan's power unseals his own. The core he has cultivated so diligently pulses with power and the remaining binds disintegrate. Before the illusionary world around him can disappear, he reaches forward and slams a palm against the creature's chest, a smile of triumph curling at his lips.

"There you are," he whispers and drags them both to the real world that awaits them. His eyes flicker towards the real Lan Zhan, who looks pale and strikingly furious, and smirks coyly, "Lan Zhan! Someone had the audacity to steal your Wei Ying from you!"

The fury in his husband's eyes brightens into an inferno ready to destroy the most powerful of foes, and Wei Ying can't help but quiver in delight, in satisfaction. No words are needed between them, their souls and actions in perfect harmony. The creature that had taken him, and now is beholden to him, collapses and rebuilds itself, now not in Lan Zhan's form but again the form of the corpse he and the juniors had first encountered. It tries to fight against his power, but it stands no chance.

Lan Zhan steps forward, Bichen already unsheathed and ready to cut the corpse down, but Wei Ying shakes his head. He turns to the corpse, "Now, my friend, let's figure out what you are."

Wei Ying slams a talisman on the creature's chest and watches in satisfaction as it binds the creature completely. It squirms and tries to break the binds but to no avail. Seeing that the prisoner is secure, the juniors, healthy and hale, rush forward, gathering around him in concern.

Wei Ying smiles and meets Lan Zhan's eyes over their heads. 'Ah,' He thinks with something like heat curling in him, 'still furious.'

Indeed, Lan Zhan is furious. His eyes are dark and tracking all of Wei Ying's movements. His smile takes on an edge and he tilts his head to the side, baring his neck just slightly. Lan Zhan's eyes narrow and lips thin.

"Aiya," he pats the children indulgently, "Let your senior go, your Hanguang-jun is getting impatient."

The juniors flush red, and mutter excuses to leave. Wei Ying looks at Lan Zhan and reaches forward to pull him, but that movement shifts his sleeve to show the red markings and he finds his arm in the other’s grasp as Lan Zhan pulls him closer, so Wei Ying’s weight is entirely on his body as if he's hugging him. He's startled.

"Ah, Lan Zhan what're you—" he cuts off mid-sentence as Lan Zhan curls one hand around his waist, holding him close, and the other raises his hair, letting air brush against his nape. The sensation tingles; Lan Zhan knows his weak spot and with the energy flow from earlier it's sensitive, and Wei Ying flushes figuring out—"Lan Zhan, wait, wait—Ah!!"

His back arches and he shivers as Lan Zhan’s lips infused with spiritual energy land on his neck and he continues with a sharp bite, one that lets Wei Ying know just how displeased his husband is, how worried he had been and how thankful he now is that they are safe. Wei Ying can't help the squeak that comes from him at the action, but he is not hurt. The bite is followed by a tender kiss, one that spreads his husband's spiritual energy through him, chasing away the redness of the spider-webbed marks on his arms, filling him with comfort and at the same time lighting a fire in him.

"Wei Ying is careless," Lan Zhan says, lips moving against Wei Ying's skin when he doesn't even pull away to speak, "I have been worried, Wei Ying was gone, alone."

He says the last part softly but Wei Ying hears it anyway with their bodies together, he can feel his warmth, their heartbeats and breaths mingling together, he can feel him and Wei Ying feels at ease, Lan Zhan’s words make his heart ache, 'Aish his beloved', "Lan-er-gege," he begins, his voice mellow and teasing, "Lan-er-gege, I felt you," he says, tracing Lan Zhan's back with his fingers as his breathing hitches. "I wasn't alone,” he finishes.

After waiting for a moment to soak in the comfort, Wei Ying leans back and looks at his husband, before leaning in to pull him into a kiss Lan Zhan leans into him, desperate and fierce. A strong arm curls around his back, holding onto him tightly. Wei Ying feels fond as he cups his husband's face, making soothing noises in the back of his throat even as the kiss grows heated. He pulls away with a gasp, chuckling when Lan Zhan doesn't let go, dipping his head to kiss along his jaw, "Aiya, husband, we're in public. Your uncle could arrive any moment now."

Lan Zhan doesn't let go and Wei Ying yelps when sharp teeth sink into his flesh once again, "How cruel to your poor Wei Ying!"

"It would seem you're well, Wuxian," An amused voice interrupts them and Wei Ying startles, looking beyond his beloved to see Lan Xichen watching them in amusement. Wei Ying pushes Lan Zhan away and, this time, his husband parts with him reluctantly to bow to their brother. There's not even an ounce of shame on his beloved's face and Wei Ying feels flushed. How unfair.

He turns to greet Lan Xichen. "Da baizi! Yes, I'm okay!" Lan Wangji's arm around him tightens and Wei Ying squirms slightly. Their robes are already in a complete state of disarray. "Lan Zhan!" he whispers though he's pretty sure it’s still loud, and, sure enough, he hears a chuckle as Lan Xichen shakes his head slightly.

"That's a relief," he smiles at them, which Wei Ying returns just as bright, "I will not hold you up further," he says gently, and adds a joyful and teasing, "I'll go let Uncle know."

To not disturb you is left unsaid as he turns to leave and Wei Ying hides his face in Lan Zhan's neck as he hums in agreement, completely unrepentant. "Lan Zhaaaan" but doesn't say anything else as the door closes. The smile remains on his face; everyone is home safe, Wei Ying is happy, and it all feels right once again.

#storytime with bunnies #mdzs fic #wangxian #mdzs juniors #wei wuxian #lan wangji #lan sizhui #lan jingyi #jin ling #post canon #wei wuxian and the juniors #justdoityoufucker #vrishchika

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cdmagic1408 · 3 years ago

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(click for better quality!! DO NOT STEAL!!)

Whew! I managed to draw this in spare time between my busy college classes and right before boarding the plane to LA �� ⬆️

But anyway…

✨ Happy 2nd Anniversary Onward!!! ✨

Chantar's Talon! What can I say that I haven't already said?

I guess I'll start with who would've thought I'd still be attached to this movie two years later?!

Yet here I am and I am not sorry at all 😎

I love Ian and Barley so much, their brotherhood is beautiful on so many levels, and their world is absolutely awesome! 😍

Having said that, I think it's pretty safe to say that Onward has become my absolute favorite animated movie of all time, and my ultimate comfort film!

But it's also so much more than that...

Onward is inspiring, relatable, funny, and magical. But let me emphasize on why it is ✨ inspiring ✨...

I've always been shy, introverted, and afraid to put myself out there to people and to share what I like with them. But Ian's journey to be bold has inspired me to be more bold too! ✊

First by writing and publishing a 33-chapter fanfic continuation of his and Barley's story from where it left off, then creating this blog and sharing it with you guys, and finally having the guts and confidence to advertise this story across my college campus!

And having done all of that, I feel great! 😄

I love being here, I love this fandom, and I love you Quest Masters! I love coming here everyday and getting to share my love and my thoughts on this film with all of you!

I've loved movies and shows on a die-hard level before but this is really the first fandom I've ever truly been a part of

I became an active member of the Onward fandom just about six months ago but before that I was sorta incognito, writing IYTM undercover hoping to prove myself and share something great and authentic with you all ✍️

But now I am happy and proud to be out here, to support you guys, to have done my part, and to continue doing my part to help keep this film's legacy alive because I think it is super important

Not only to help it receive the same amount of credit as other beloved Pixar films do, but also because I feel represented by this film 🎖

I haven't really said this yet but sometimes I turn to Onward because certain days in college, I just miss my family: my mom and my sister, my Laurel and my Barley.

I miss having all three of us together in the same house, and when my sister and I went to school together. And sometimes I wish I could go back and relive those days again... 😔

But I feel so lucky to spend Onward's anniversary week with them both in LA this week! A family reunion! And I can't wait to spend it with all of you today! 😃

I guess to wrap things up, over my winter break a couple months ago I managed to find my movie ticket from when I saw Onward for the first time in theaters back on March 9th, 2020! 🎞 🤩

I'm so glad I still have it as it marked the beginning of something truly great! But I also see it as a memory of how things were before COVID hit. I genuinely don't know when things will go back to normal (that is Pixar movies going back to theaters...) but I'm grateful I have this movie to bring me a smile on my face everyday 😊

So thank you all for loving Onward as much as I do and for believing in it. Because I still believe in it and I hope to keep believing in it for years to come ✨

#onward anniversary #onward 2nd anniversary #onward #onward pixar #disney onward #pixar onward #pixar #disney pixar #pixar movies #onward fandom #ian lightfoot #barley lightfoot #onward ian #onward barley #cdmagic1408

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ladykatakuri · 4 years ago

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Coming Home to You

Echo x F Reader

Word count: 2363

Warnings: None really, it has some mentioning of nightmares and sadness and some fluffyness

I used the lyrics of a song to enhance the story i wanted to tell here.

Song: Sleep well my angel by We are the Fallen

Summary: Echo never thought he would ever dance with someone again, until you. He loved you there and then and it only became more

Watching you sleep for so long,

Knowing I can't turn the rain into sun any more

I've given you all that I have,

Now I stand here, too scared to hold your hand.

Afraid you might wake to see

The monster that had to leave

Echo stood in front of you, staring at your soft face with a sad smile. This beautiful person, soft smile on her face while asleep and his greatest love. But despite the deep and intense love that only grew stronger with each passing day, he felt he had to leave, deep inside himself. He was not the same man he once was, the Techno Union made sure of that.

When he was taken by them and they changed his body, something inside of him died. There was no escape, only the off chance of death for him and it was what he longed for the most. He had given up on being rescued and made peace with himself. If he could stop them from abusing his body and mind by dying, then it was alright. He might have even safed his brothers with his death.

Then one day he was found. Found by his brothers, by a crew of misfits and his captain who he admired greatly. Broken and no longer the man he once was, he was safed and had the smallest amount of hope that maybe, just maybe, he could find a way to live again. It took a long time to really recover physically and at times he still would find himself wondering how he could have adjusted to the loss of limbs and a normal body. But here he was, alive and with a new family. He still had nightmares and many regrets. His closest friend and brother had died without him around to at least say goodbye. Fives was no longer there to lift his spirit when he felt down in the dumps, but the memory of his fallen brother was greatly treasured and could at times still put a smile on his face.

Then he met you. A waitress at 79s, always kind, smiling and always ready to make him and his brothers feel welcome. Make them all feel like actual human beings. You never treated them as nothing more than canon fodder or throw away human replicants, clones. To you they were all normal people with names and personalities. You even helped them find their own uniqueness and expres it at times, by painting their armor or figuring out what kind of tattoo would suit them. It blew him away when he first spoke to you and you just smiled at him with that bright and soft smile of yours. You grabbed his comp link as if it was his normal hand and dragged him to the dancefloor. Echo never thought he would ever dance with someone again, until you. He loved you there and then and it only became more, a deeper love and a deeper respect as well. From that moment on it was you and him. You helped him through his nightmares and his insecurities, helped him fight off the flashes of memories that sometimes came all of a sudden and would paralyze him in his tracks. You gave him his space when he needed to be on his own to work through his pain and personal hell, but always nearby when he needed to be caught after falling deep.

' Cause you see the shelter as the storm

Holding wind to keep you on,

You are everything to me, this is why I have to leave,

So sleep well my angel.

“Echo….. Don't leave me….” Four words, muttered in your sleep, but to Echo it was heartbreaking. You had felt something coming, realised that he was struggling more than ever before and even though he smiled and loved you as before, there was something different within. He kept a part of him hidden away from you and though you never said anything about it, you did know. Now, Echo was standing there, staring at the only person in the galaxy he loved more than life itself and he was drinking in your features for the last time. He had to go, you have sheltered him, acted as his shelter through all the storms raging in his mind, but now it was time to protect you from the last person he thought would be hurting you, himself.

Gently bending over you, Echo brushes a lock of hair behind your ear and softly brushes with his lips over yours. You sigh and a smile forms on your lips once more. As you automatically reach to the pillow next to you where he usually lays, Echo whispers. “Sleep well my angel.” One tear slowly falls down his cheek as he turns to leave the room and the only place he truly called home.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Under the ash and the lies,

Something beautiful once here now dies,

And the tears burn my eyes,

As you sit there, all alone.

I just want to come home,

It had been several weeks since you last saw Echo. The only explanation you had for his sudden disappearance was a small note and a dried flower that he left on your desk.

Y/N,

I can never tell you how much you mean to me, how much you healed my heart. You stayed with me in the good times and when I went through my darkest moments. I love you more than I could ever say, that is why I had to leave. This is the only way to keep you from falling with me. My love for you is eternal, my wish for your happiness is the reason I ask you to think of me, not with hate but with the gentle smile you always have when thinking about the good times. Be happy my angel.

Always,

Echo

You kept the letter and the dried flower in a small wooden box in your desk. Sometimes you would look at it and cry, most times you tried your hardest to ignore the nagging feeling to take it out and hold it against your heart while in bed. At times you would just sit at your desk when memories flushed your mind and your tears fell without you even noticing it until much later. You would wonder why your cheeks were wet and then remember what it was you were thinking of. “Echo…” Just the mentioning of his name could be enough for you to be withdrawn all day and night, to stay in bed for hours or not get dressed and just sit on your couch as you blankly stare at a holo. Sometimes you would forget to eat and if it were not for your caf addiction, you would also forget to drink, but most times it was just the memory of pain and sadness, mixed with deep love and missing him that were ever present within you as you continued your daily life.

Now you were sitting at a table in a small diner somewhere on Coruscant. It was a nice and calm time to be there and you enjoyed those moments where you could calmly sip your caf, take a bite from your food and doodle away on a padd with the person sitting in front of you. “You know, it would help if you had a better picture of Numa. Now I can only guess the colour of her headdress.” Smiling, you look at the man in front of you when a shiver runs down your spine. You had those at times, at first you believed it was because Echo would be nearby and you would look around the place to find him. Then, when you realised he was never around, you just shrugged it off and moved on. Boil reached over the table and handed you a small piece of paper. “This is it Y/N, thanks for helping me out. I really want to have it on my armor.”

From a small distance. Echo was looking at you. Staring would be a better word to describe it. From the moment he left you behind with only his letter and small gift he felt terrible. His nightmares seemed to have gotten worse and not even his brothers were able to calm him anymore.

Hunter urged him to go back to you and finally talk to you, really talk to you, about everything he went through and still is. But, how could he explain to you that each time he would wake from his nightmares, he would be parazlyzed with fear? That he would see couples happily walk along the boardwalks, holding hands and smiling, dancing to music while in the back of his mind, he knew he was not all man and never enough of a man for you? How he saw you smile when you would see children play and he did not even know if he could ever make you a mother?

Tech would come with explanations as to why he felt this way, why his emotions were all over the place and even came with options for treatment, without having to report it to the doctors back at Kamino. If they were to find out how deep his emotions went, he would most likely be decommissioned or mind wiped. Neither were options to him, because they would mean losing you permanently. At Least now, he could still see you , even if it was from a distance and it pained him immensely.

Wrecker pulled him into a strong hug while he mentioned being his brother and always being there for him. That he could always find him if he needed to talk or wanted to vent by hitting him, or blowing something up. He might not seem like it, but Wrecker had many layers to him and the happy go lucky, destruction loving man was only the surface layer of him. He was always good at cheering up people and making them feel safe.

It was Crosshair that actually helped him decide what he truly wanted. “Just go to her and apologize. You wanna go home right? Stop being a coward and go home.” Flicking his toothpick at him while smirking, Crosshair walked off and left Echo at the diner where he saw you. Crosshair had brought him exactly where he needed to be and the moment he saw you, he knew, he did want to come home. And home is you.

Boil was happy with the work the two of you had done to his helmet. He finally had a small drawing of Numa on it that you helped him draw and color to honor the little sister he and Waxer had pretty much adopted back on Ryloth. Hugging you goodbye, he left with a grin and proudly pulled his helmet down over his head. Now you are back on your own again, ordering another caf. Suddenly a shadow falls over you.

When you look up, you stare into brown eyes, eyes that look at you with deep emotions of regret, fear and love.

“Echo….” Mouth open in amazement you see the man you missed for so long, you longed for and hated at the same time and who is now standing in front of you. “What…? What are you doing here?” You don't know what to make of this, he left you with a letter and a dried flower as a goodbye and while his brothers did stay in touch as much as they could, he never contacted you again. The guys could not tell you exactly what had happened but you knew they did not agree with his actions either, though they would never tell you.

I'm sorry

You see the shelter as the storm,

Holding wind to keep you on,

You are everything to me, this is why

“I`m sorry. I`m sorry, I`m so sorry…..” A tear falls from his eye as he stares at you and his body seems to tremble. You look up at the love of your life as he keeps on apologizing to you, body shaking, head almost exploding with all the emotions that run through you. You do the only thing you can do, you grab his hand and pull him down to your level and kiss him. Full on the lips with the diner as your witness you kiss this man that has been the love of your life all along, who you knew was going through more than you would ever be able to fully understand.

Surprised by your actions, Echo returns your sudden kiss and pulls back. A watery smile forms as he grabs for a chair and sits down next to you. “I…. I don't know how to explain….”

You raise your hand and stop him from talking. “Echo, how could you think I wouldn't understand? I knew my love. The nightmares, the anger and how sometimes you just had to be on your own or with your brothers? I knew and I know.” Suddenly, to his great surprise, you punch him on the arm. “How could you think I wouldn't understand?! I hated you when you just left in the middle of the night! I mean…. I know why you did it, even if you hadn't explained in that letter, but you should have known I understood! You kriffing idiot!” Tears freely fall as you lash out lovingly and Echo quickly grabs you by the waist and pulls you into his arms. Sitting you on his lap, not paying any attention to the other guests of the diner he kisses you. Arms wrapped around you, your head tugged against his neck, you feel his lips brush your ear as he whispers, “I love you my angel. We`ll work through it, I`ll work through it. Always.”

The diner guests clap when they realise what had happened and outside, just out of sight, four men grin and high five as they walk off towards a well known bar to celebrate the happy ending for their brother.

@loth-wolffe @hellothere-generalangsty @reluctant-mandalore @nahoney22

#echo x reader #echo the clone wars #echo the bad batch #Song lyrics fic #Coming home to You

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japes-the-clown · 4 years ago

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THE SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS MOVIE: AN INVERSION ON “COMING OF AGE” FILMS AND A CRITICISM OF ADULTHOOD

Hi hello hey it’s me Jericho Jay “Japes” Marshall out here with a pretentious love letter to the filmmaking on display in nickelodeons The Spongebob Movie. Yes, I know it’s a kids movie. Yes, I know it’s not that deep. But I’m majoring in english, and deeply depressed, so I need to get this OUT and onto a PAGE.

I have watched this film many times over my lifetime, a few when i was just a kid, then in my early teens, even when i turned eighteen, and now, a month before i turn 20. Every time, I grow a new appreciation for the nuances that this movie brings to the table, and on my most recent watch my own deliverance from childhood makes me relate to the core themes the hardest I ever have. The Spongebob Movie isn’t just a movie about childhood, but a movie about adulthood.

Today, I’m going to make clear exactly how The Spongebob Squarepants Movie criticizes our understanding of adulthood and how society treats the neurodivergent, while effectively turning the “Coming of Age” genre on its head, within its 87 minute runtime.

START: CONSISTENT CHARACTERIZATION

One thing a lot of films (ESPECIALLY kids films) fail to nail is consistently showing aspects of a character throughout the runtime, enough that changes to a character feel impactful and justified instead of rushed and stifled. The best examples of movies that fail to do this are often the marvel movies that people tend to not remember- the first two thor movies, the avengers age of ultron, etc. In these movies, characters certainly have traits, but their personalities and motives can be very weak and make dramatic changes feel A LOT less dramatic. This can be seen in age of ultron, when quicksilver gave his own life to save someone else, which felt like nothing because he wasn't well developed. He wasn't particularly endearing, nor did him sacrificing his life contradict a part of his character. It felt very much like the writers trying to say "Look, this character which was once opposing the avengers, is now dying for one. Please cry." No hate to the writers of Age of Ultron, but it proves itself often to be an unmemorable part of the catalogue.

In the Spongebob Movie, the characterization is ON. POINT. After the introduction, with the pirates rushing in to watch spongebob, we get so much information regarding spongebob as a character.

Pictured: Spongebob holding a piece of cheese like an operator

The first scene of the plot is a dream sequence a large crowded scene at the Krusty Krab, with a customer not receiving cheese on his patty, and it being positioned in the same way as a bomb being located. In the dream, everyone is panicked, and Mr. Krabs is visibly distressed, almost like a damsel. Spongebob comes in, announcing his position as manager, much to the relief of Krabs. He goes in, and puts cheese on the burger (again, very akin to a bomb defusal scene), bringing the perturbed customer out safe and sound. Everyone lifts spongebob up as a hero, which is interrupted by his boat alarm.

This scene is JAM PACKED with stuff that both introduces the character to new watchers and introduces the crux of his arc to everyone else. Spongebob of course is very fond of the Krusty Krab, and wants to be the manager- he wants people to see him as cool, and as a responsible adult. He wants to be the sort of person that can be trusted with big responsibilities. And we also see, most importantly, that he is extremely childish through his faximile of what it meant to be adult. Everything is scaled up; it's a very silly situation, which well suits both the joke and his character as an inexperienced kid. This is one of the most direct ways to convey someone's character, because a dream can be interpreted as a direct port into a character's desires. This being the first introduction to the character in the movie sets the tone for EVERY following situation.

In the next few scenes you see Spongebob's real life, which involves his lengthy morning routine; his life is sort of whimsical, and so too is his routine. He showers by shoving a hose into himself till he bursts with water, he uses toothpaste to clean his eyes but not his teeth, and he puts on pants which he must fold to make. Again, all pretty solid jokes, but also very telling about his outlook. He is funny, weird, and childish, which is juxtaposed by the scene where he's- he's uh- showering with squidward. Squidward is an example of the "adult" that spongebob isn't. This has always been the case, but here his normal routine makes it very clear that other people in this world aren't like spongebob. They shower normally, they brush their teeth, they put their clothes on like normal. Spongebob's world is one of wonder and without responsibility, which makes it questionable as to whether he could handle one.

Pictured: Spongebob's room, adorned with childhood imagery

Pictured: Spongebob celebrating his position as a manager, despite Krabs saying that it was squidward who got it

Even his room in this scene screams "kid". He has toys strewn about, glow in the dark stars, and pictures of superheroes on the wall. He even says "Sorry about this calendar" as he rips a page, personifying inanimate objects as a kid would. The movie is telling you, "THIS CHARACTER IS A KID", but in a way that's masked because it's also just a set up for jokes. It's done so well, in my opinion, that it would go over your head because from your perspective you would be laughing along as spongebob did his wacky antics.

On top of that, his excitement for his assured managerial position at the Krusty Krab 2 continues to be bolstered. He marked it off with a cute drawing on his calendar, for those familiar he changes his normal "I'm ready" chant to "I'm ready- promotion-", and he's even already set up a party to celebrate at his favorite chain, Goofy Goobers, a child's entertainment restaurant similar to chucky cheese, albeit replacing pizza for ice cream. He hasn't just gotten excited, but has this childish anticipation for something which isn't even assured.

Spongebob arrives at the opening of the Krusty Krab 2, where he is so excited he can't contain his glee. He breaks the silence and makes members of the crowd uncomfortable, reinforcing again that spongebob is a standout in a world of adults, and a kid who doesn't understand certain social norms, which society looks down upon. When Krabs reveals that Squidward got the managerial position, Spongebob hyped himself so much that he starts celebrating, not even noticing that he wasn't picked. He gets on stage, and begins to give a speech, to which Krabs interrupts.

The next part I think best illustrates Spongebob's clear ignorance to society: Krabs attempts to subtly tell spongebob that he isn't getting the job, but spongebob repeats everything he says into the microphone. Again, fantastic joke, grade A, but the amount this shows how invested spongebob was. He already saw himself as an adult, someone who everyone would look up to as a manager- he could take the responsibility, and isn't aware of everyone likely cringing in the audience. This is the natural step for him in his mind, especially because of his exemplary work which had been previously celebrated through employee of the month awards. This was not an option for him. There wasn't a world in his mind where he would be outclassed by squidward.

Krabs has to break to him that he lacks responsibility, and that his childishness makes it difficult for Krabs to give him such a job. This might seem harsh, but I think the intro again shows how Spongebob saw the job; he didn't understand what it would be like, fantasizing another level in the menial work structure to be an amazing adventure of a job. People in the crowd reaffirm that in the eyes of society, spongebob is just a kid, a goofball. In my eyes, this is a story not just of childhood, but of neurodivergence. Spongebob isn't normal, and is blocked by society for his ignorance of social norms and sunny disposition. He finds things fun that other people can not, and he places values in completely different things. So he is blocked from the meaningful recognition he desired, despite the obvious evidence of his commitment.

I think this is a mighty interesting dichotomy!!! Simultaneously, spongebob's understanding of the world truly is warped, often resulting in a lack of consideration for others as well as harm for himself when things don't go his way, AND he is a good worker which puts in MANY hours of work without so much of a complaint. This is COMPLEX. You have to ask yourself, as a viewer, "would I give spongebob the job?" The answer can be different and can be REASONED.

And that's JUST spongebob! There are other characters with characterization that mixes into the themes of the movie very well, but I'm going to bring up any related points in future sections.

Okay, Okay. So now you're saying "WOW OKAY GREAT so why does any of this matter?" I'm so glad you asked. VERY glad.

2: THE BREAKING OF A YOUNG MAN'S SPIRIT

THIS is the point of the movie. The obstacle in this movie truly isn't adulthood, but instead self doubt. Spongebob's whole world is turned upside down by Krab's rejection of his basic personality. Spongebob asks himself: is it REALLY okay to be who I am? Am I an adult? Is the world fair? One of the most shocking scenes in the movie is blended so well in tone with the rest that you don't really notice; spongebob eating ice cream to cope with his disappointment, akin to that of adults drinking alcohol, and appearing to be visually "drunk" and washed up. This is BRILLIANT, and a recurring theme, where the true line between adult and childhood becomes blurry and impossible to see. Spongebob, the representation of a kid, gets hungover, spiteful, and angry about the injustice of his situation. This is often how adults act in the fact of adversity, but what's funny is that this too is how a kid would act; getting angry and overindulging, feeling entitled and acting socially immature when he didn't get what he wanted. He walks in to the Krusty Krab literally just to shit talk Krabs. And it doesn't stop there.

Pictured: Plankton finding "Plan Z" and looking at it like a centerfold in a playboy magazine

Almost every character in this movie juxtaposes another, again smearing the line of what it means to be an adult. For example, Spongebob and Plankton are polar opposites; plankton is cold and vengeful, angry at the world around him, and spongebob is a happy person who tends not to take things personally, a friend to all. In planktons first appearances in the movie, he is portrayed with clear adult themes, mocking spongebob, making pinup jokes about plan z, and living in a fairly dark and grey space. But, as the story moves along, we see many similarities; both spongebob and plankton are fairly one track minded, and when spongebob's perception is broken he himself gets a little vengeful. When eugene is put in danger over this, though, we do see that he places the lives of others over his own wants. And, even at the end of the movie, we see their similarities. Plankton reuses the "Sorry Calendar" joke that spongebob used at the start of the movie, drawing another line of what it means to be an adult. Is it childish of plankton to say that? Is the inherent irony he has impactful here? His want for something that isn't his, and his disregard for others in pursuing it feels just like how a younger child may steal the toy of another, without understanding what it means to share.

Pictured: Neptune flipping his shit at his lost crown

Then, there's the character of Neptune. Neptune is a big man baby. He rules the entire land, commands the most respect, and is considered the most powerful person under the sea, and yet, we see that he gets overprotective of his property, prepared to execute anyone who even annoys him. Throughout the film, he's obsessed with chasing an image of youth, as he is bald, and ignores the suffering of the people on bikini bottom to make sure no one sees his bald head. He throws what's equivalent to a tantrum when he finds his crown is missing, and believes a very crude note written by plankton saying that it was eugene who stole it. His character is an "acceptable" child because he's in a position of power, where spongebob is an "unacceptable" child as he is just a working class member of society. And the funniest part is, that he mocks spongebob for wanting to go for the crown, when even he, the strongest person in bikini bottom, refuses to go out of fear.

We see that these "bastions" of adulthood, plankton and neptune, are the ones who are responsible for missteps of society; we're ALL children in the long run, but the strict enforcement of a perceived true adulthood creates a space where they can act immaturely yet those under them/around them cannot. Dennis makes this case even more, as the only thing he does in this movie is hurt others. There's only one thing that seems to truly denote adulthood, and it's cruelty.

Even squidward, the adult that is supposed to be more responsible that spongebob, refuses to go on the quest to retrieve the crown, as he acts mostly in self interest, even later claiming to only care that plankton was stealing the secret formula as it was hurting his own paycheck.

Spongebob is the only one willing to go, willing to defend the man who wronged him, willing to value life over his own interests. He is both child and adult, just as the adults are too children.

As he moves through the plot of this film, he becomes less confident in his disposition, with his naivete causing moments like him and patrick crossing the state line and immediately getting carjacked, or them being put into an uncomfortable situation by all the bubbles they blew when they tried to get their car back. His bright personality is questioned constantly: Only five days to shell city? BY CAR. This is man's country. But weren't we the double bubble blowing babies?

Pictured: Spongebob caught trying to take back the key to the patty wagon when patrick fails to distract everyone

This is made more obvious to him as patrick remains oblivious throughout; patrick is a mirror for him, that acts as a childhood constant, that makes it clearer for him every day the draws of his childishness. There's the moment in the club where patrick's distraction was poorly thought out, and only because he said he wanted to do it adamantly, there's the moment where patrick challenged neptune on how many days they would have to do it, which served no purpose but for his own fun, there's the moment patrick points out the free ice cream trap- he is the unemployed uncritical lens that spongebob is afraid he is.

So everything's fucked, and anyone who is childish is bad i guess!!!

But that isn't so,

3: The illusion of manhood

So we've talked about spongebob's characterization as a naive child, how this is impactful in his transformation into someone who is anxious about that aspect of his personality, and how the society around him is hypocritical in it's own immaturity. But where does this all come together?

Pictured: Planktons dystopian world, which Mindy shows Spongebob and Patrick

It's at spongebob and patricks "conversion to manhood". At his lowest point, spongebob becomes a squidward- he becomes critical of his AND patricks interests, and regards them as childish, deciding that this means that they can't make it to shell city, as it requires them to be adults. When mindy shows them the dire situation back home, she hopes that spongebob's sunny personality and care for others would shine through, but instead he turns to what society has been telling him; it's impossible. He can't do it, he's just a little kid, and there is no point to any of this as he'll fail regardless.

Thinking about it like this, it truly is one of the darkest points in the entire series; spongebob just openly admitted that there was nothing he could do, that all of his friends were goners because he was effectively useless.

Mindy comes up with an idea; she'll trick spongebob and patrick into believing they're men; she convinces them of mermaid magic (their innocence allowing them to believe) and uses kelp to make them think they've matured into adults. Notice that physical modifiers being the only key to this "fake adulthood". With this, they jump off a cliff because they believe that with adulthood, they are invincible.

This is really telling about how the society they're in thinks of being an adult, and relays that to children. There's another level, a distinct separation between spongebob and adulthood, which seemed like the difference between a squire and a knight- being an adult means that you aren't weak anymore (as though he was weak in the first place), and thus you can do things you never thought before. Is it truly healthy that this is how a society tells kids that adulthood is like, for them to enter the world and feel a truly awful financial and literal hellscape waiting for them? uh, you can, you can decide that for yourself i think.

Nonetheless, they survive the fall, and conclude that they really are invincible, able to power through a ravine with their happy go lucky attitude, eventually befriending the monsters which were once trying to kill them. They weren't acting like adults, but the labels themselves made it possible for them to soldier on with the childlike disposition they had. I find that to be powerful. If we were able to be more hopeful as adults, and power through the worst things brightly, could we do great things? Idk but these depression meds sure do taste good nom nom

After crossing the ravine, spongebob and patrick meet dennis, and have their worldview crushed as it's revealed that they are actually still kids. Dennis being the "alpha male" that he is, is characterized by violence and a lack of morality. The pair are saved by a giant boot, which is the first of two humans in this movie. Spongebob and patrick are both taken by the man in the diver suit, as we fade to black, marking the end of their illusion of adulthood.

4: Back from the Edge (of death)

Spongebob and Patrick awaken in an antique shop, realizing that they were surrounded by fish that had been killed specifically for sale as tacky antiques. They are lifted out of their fishbowl, and put under a heatlamp, as their fate is sealed to become a member among those dead fish. In spongebob's final moments, he mourns his inability to be an adult, as well as to reach shell city; but before they both die, patrick points out that they truly did reach shell city, as the crown was within their reach.

This. This is a phenomenal scene. Why? Because of what it means for spongebob's arc.

Pictured: Spongebob and Patrick on their deathbeds, finding happiness

He sees the crown, and realizes that, unequivocally, that even if he didn't bring the crown back, he made it to shell city. Every person he met told him that he couldn't even do that. and he did it. He is a kid, yes, but he's a kid who went where not even NEPTUNE dared go. Everything people said about him, about how him being a kid stopped him from success, was suddenly shattered. He has been asking himself if it's okay that he is a kid, and he saw, unambiguously, that it is. He is allowed to be happy. He can enjoy things that other people don't. He can be naive. He can be himself, no matter what anyone says. And so can you. Great things can be done by people who are "childish", who are "naive", who are kind without expecting a return, all of it. YOU are okay. Your stims are okay, your comfort series are okay, your interest in tropes are okay, YOU'RE OKAY!!!!

with that, spongebob and patrick are dehydrated on the table, and ostensibly die, the kids that they are, shedding one final tear each, forming a heart beneath them.

...

Miraculously, the tear electrocutes that lamp at it's socket, causing smoke to rise and set off the sprinklers, rehydrating the pair, and bringing them back to life. The "Man in the Suit" attempts to capture them, seeing them about to lift Neptune's crown, but the rest of the dehydrated fish come back to life- squirting him with his own glue and beating him to the ground, as spongebob and patrick run out with the crown. David Hasselhoff offers them a ride back to Bikini Bottom, and the pair begin their ride back.

5: The confrontation of Adulthood and Childhood

Pictured: Dennis looking all lame and shit

As spongebob and patrick are being swam back to bikini bottom, the boot under which dennis was crushed rockets to Hasselhoff, spitting him back out to finish the job. The appearance of Dennis, IN MY OPINION, makes him look rather goofy, with his broken glasses making him look more like a office worker than a badass assassin as he attempts to kill spongebob and patrick. Spongebob, in trying to reason with him, is able to ruin his eyes with bubbles, and then survives as dennis gets hit by a raised platform which spongebob and patrick are too low to be hit by.

Having defeated one representation of adulthood, spongebob and patrick are shot down by HasselHoffs MASSIVE MAN TITS with the crown in order to prevent Krab's fate, blocking Neptune's lazer just in time as they crash in.

All seems to be well, but plankton uses one of his mind control helmets (which we'll be getting into later) to enslave even Neptune, putting mindy, spongebob, patrick, and Krabs against the wall.

In another stark moment of characterization, Spongebob tells patrick that "Plankton Cheated", which prompts plankton to tell spongebob that the situation wasn't a kiddy game, and that it was the real world. This sort of distinctions in their ethos tell you how spongebob interacts with justice; he believes in "playing fair", while plankton is bitter and believes in getting what he wants.

Finally, the apex to our plot, is a musical number. Spongebob begins to make a long-winded speech, where he takes ownership of every label he was called as he stood on the stage at the beginning, the similarity between the two events being clear (holding a microphone at an inappropriate time, making a speech as he blocks out input from an adult trying to talk him down). Spongebob then busts out into the film's rendition of Twisted Sister's "I Wanna Rock", "I'm a Goofy Goober". This results in spongebob reversing plankton's whole plot with "the power of rock and roll". Plankton is made powerless, and thrown into a little padded cell.

The final scene in the movie has Mr. Krabs freed from his imprisonment in ice, and spongebob is offered squidwards position as manager of the second Krusty Krab. He seems hesitant, and squidward offers an insightful analysis of what spongebob might be feeling (the typical analysis of a coming of age movie, where the protagonist finds out that what they wanted all along is not what they wanted, but it was what was inside all along). Spongebob refutes that squidwards fly was just down, and GLADLY accepts the job.

AND THAT'S THE MOVIE

6: AN INVERSION ON THE COMING OF AGE GENRE

A coming of age story tends to be one which is focus on the growth of a character from childhood to adulthood, asking questions about what it means to be an adult. A character reaches for their perceived adulthood, and realizes what it means to ACTUALLY be an adult, typically juxtaposing what people think (drugs, parties, sex) versus what the movie postures as the correct adulthood (responsibility). In this, I think that the spongebob movie directly criticizes the position of what "an adult" is, in the sense of how someone acts.

Like we discussed in part 2, every adult character in this movie tends to be very childish in themselves, unable to see through simple ruses, and often very possessive of personal property. I don't think we actually see a child in this movie as a speaker at any point, only really as background characters (in goofy goobers to solidify spongebob as childish, and I believe in the chum bucket as they're lead to an unsafe place by their parents, who are supposed to be responsible). Thus, what is mostly examined is how adulthood and childhood is a very thin line. Squidward, for example, going directly to plankton to accuse him of stealing the formula, instead of taking it to the top immediately, which would have ended this whole thing fairly quickly; that was rather silly, and was the fruit of his need to assert himself as an adult.

Spongebob goes through this movie FIRST not caring much about whether or not he was an adult, and it is only after the social pressure from adults does he start to chase it. He then chases his perceived image of an adult, going on an adventure, and is crushed by the fact that he isn't an adult. Instead of finding what an adult is, he instead becomes comfortable with his existence as a child, finding himself at the end of the movie able to comfortably chase after an ideal again, where in a normal movie he would humbly reject the job he was offered.

This is, truly, what we should all take from this film. Spongebob realizes that people who aren't necessarily socially adjusted or acceptable can do great things, regardless of what the people around them say, especially because the people around them are liable to throw tantrums and be actively harmful to society. He is allowed to find comfort in childish things, and to be naive, because the world needs more people willing to help others. It's a scathing criticism on the imposed adulthood that exists in a lot of coming of age films, which begs us to drop fun in the interest of doing the right thing, as though those two ideas are contradictory.

BONUS: EXTRA STUFF THAT I LIKED

The goofy goober song became really good storytelling, at first marking childishness, then marking a level of discomfort and judgement in the club, then marking spongebob recognizing that his happiness came from what he liked and not some vague idea of adulthood, and finally marking his full acceptance of his childishness, taking the form of rock, the music of rebellion. It's not as subtle as leitmotifs, but it works really well in how the same song can give very different feelings throughout, and inform how we interact with a story.

There are a lot more examples of adults being pressured into childishness, with the connected twins who liked goofy goober at the club, who were beaten senseless for absolutely no reason, which highlights the way that the society hurts people that, by all means, are just as much adults as anyone else. There's of course Plankton's helmets which created a society of people who simply slaved away with nothing to say, taking life as it came and listening to authority.

On top of that, this movie is PRETTY ANTICAPITALIST AND ANTIMONARCHY, despite those things being allowed to continue to exist at the end- monarchy is seen misusing power constantly and often for unfounded reasons, and Spongebob's diligence at work is rejected by a penny pinching Krabs, who cares only about money. Like, THE KRUSTY KRABS ARE RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER? THAT IS SOME MONTY PYTHON ASS SHIT. This year is the first year i laughed at that joke, because it's really some "capitalists are fucking dumb as shit" humor that slipped over my head when i was a kid. The villain literally being defeated by Rock and Roll, which was sung with a message against the oppression of differences in people? Yeah, I think the spongebob movie hated rich mother fuckers.

END: UH YEAH THAT'S WHAT IT IS

So yeah. The movie is good I think. There's a lot more i could go into, but I've been writing this post for hours and at this point i haven't even read it so...

I recommend going back and giving this film a rewatch!!! Pay attention to all the moments where adults act like children/kids act like adults, because it'll make ur brain pop like a zit. Anyways that's me, I'm Jericho Jay "Japes" Marshall, and I HATE facism.

#spongebob #spongebon squarepants #analysis #film #good movie #marvel #avengers age of ultron #funny

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spencers-dria · 5 years ago

Text

Turn for the Better

Someone To Stay Ch. 1

Spencer x fem!reader

Spencer POV:

I open my eyes and glance around the room. It's darker than I remember. I must have fallen asleep reading on the couch again. I glance down and see a pile of books on the rug. Oh yeah...I only made it through about four books this time before I nodded off. I sigh in frustration that I'm awake. Might as well get up I suppose.

I wander into the kitchen and pull open the fridge only to be met with a jar of peanut butter, week old left overs, and a half empty jug of juice. Next.

I try again with the pantry. Almost completely bare. I guess this is what happens when you stop going to the grocery store. I settle on a cup of apple juice and a bag of chips... better than nothing right?

I slump back down onto the couch and pull my green wool blanket over me. As I stare up at my ceiling, as I begin to let my mind wander. But this was dangerous territory. I have to keep my mind occupied, I just have to. So I quickly sit back up and turn the TV to one of my favorite Dr. Who episodes. They say that anxious people re-watch the same shows because they find the familiarity comforting. I could definitely understand the feeling.

It was the weekend, which meant I wasn't called into work. Cases had been slow lately, as we spent quite a bit of time doing paperwork back at the office. Unfortunately for me, this meant less distractions. Distractions were good. Distractions were necessary. They are the only way I make it through the days anymore.

Things had finally returned to normal for me back at work. I was going into the field, and it felt like my coworkers were no longer tiptoeing around me. I hate when they do that, and it bothers me more than any amount of teasing ever could. I'm not so delicate, so easily breakable. Look at everything I have been through, everything I have endured. Yet here I am, still alive, still doing my job. I didn't need to be babied. So it was a relief when I felt the regular rapport I shared with my friends return. They had gone back to the sarcastic remarks and silly nicknames. I was grateful for it. They did, however, continue to check up on me. This was something that I did appreciate. They've seen me go down a dark road once before. I have no intentions of ever returning. I was stronger than that... I think. All I know is I have held on this long without resorting to any unhealthy coping mechanisms.

Coping mechanisms...oh how I wish I had something to make the healing process easier. Having a fairly empty social calendar left me alone often. Normally I would find comfort in the peace and quiet of my solitary apartment, but not quite so much lately. I couldn't very well make plans to go out, and I wouldn't even know how to begin to do that. Who would want to hang out with me right now anyways? I'd be a damper on the fun, and everyone knows it. That's probably why my friends stopped inviting me to the nights at the bar.

There I go again, letting my mind slip into a dark hole of anxiety. Its not a safe place to be. I quickly turn my attention back to the show in front of me, letting it drown out all other thoughts.

The ring of my phone quickly draws my attention away. Finally...another case! I jump up to answer, seeing the name on my screen: Derek Morgan. That's odd. Usually Hotch or Garcia call to notify us of a new case.

"Hello?" I answer, confusion lacing my voice.

"Pretty Boy! Buzz me up!"

Well now I'm even more confused. Derek never comes to my apartment. I quickly press the button letting him into the building and opening my apartment door, waiting for him to arrive.

As he comes up the stairs, he gives me a grin shouting, "Come on man! Get dressed. We're goin' out!"

I roll my eyes and retreat back into the apartment, Derek close behind me.

I sink back onto the couch, my eyes glued to the television as I tune him out.

"Aw c'mon. Don't be like that. How long have you been sitting there watching TV? Have you done anything else today, at all?"

I don't answer, I don't even look at him.

"Oh, let me guess. You've been reading all day, huh?"

"Wow, can't get anything past you huh?" I say dryly, regretting my tone as soon as the words left my mouth.

"Alright that it. You've been cooped up in here too long. Like I said before, we're going out. And I'm not taking no for an answer" he says sternly, raising an eyebrow at me.

I finally look up at him as I roll my eyes.

"You know I can kick your ass right?" Derek smirks.

"Fine" I concede. "Well...where are we going? I don't know what to wear unless you tell me what our plans are."

"Don't pretend you don't wear the same fancy button ups no matter where you end up going."

I let out a small laugh...he's got me there.

"Dinner at Rossi's. I know pretty boys are high maintenance but, hurry up or you'll make us late!" I smile at the nickname. Same old Derek.

Y/N POV:

You let out a sigh of relief as you watched your coworker approach you, ready to receive report. It had been a particularly busy shift, and you were ready to get some much-needed rest. You walked to each patient room, giving Clementine summary of the day and the latest updates on labs and vital signs. You stepped into each room with her, checking one last time to make sure each of your patients was doing well and didn't need anything else before you left. Normally you and Clem would spend some time catching up and making jokes, but she could tell you were tired and needed to be home more than anything. You wished her good luck on her shift as you made your way to the break room. After putting away your stethoscope and the large collection of pens, pencils, and markers you kept in your pockets, you finally headed towards the elevator to leave for the day.

You opened the door to your apartment to be greeted by your dog, Juneau. She was a rescue you adopted a few months back. She still needed to make progress, but she had really warmed up to you and your friends and seemed much more comfortable in her new home. After feeding her dinner and taking her for a short walk, you heated up a quick frozen dinner and sunk into your couch. Curling up in your blanket, you spent a few minutes browsing through different streaming services only to land on The Office, as usual. Your mind drifts to what your next few days might consist off. You just so happened to land 4 days off in a row, but you had no idea how you would spend your time. You glanced down at your phone as it lit up. It was your Uncle Will.

"Hey, whats up!" you chimed, glad to hear from your favorite uncle.

"Hey, (Y/N). I'm actually calling to invite you to a dinner some friends of mine are having tomorrow night. I know your schedule is real busy. But I haven't seen you much since you moved up here to Virginia! I know you haven't met many people here yet, but I think I can help you make a start. "

The kind gesture made you smile. You had always been fairly close with your father's side of the family. He had grown up in Louisiana and met your mother at a college in Texas. You spent your childhood in Houston but frequently visited the Cajun half of your family. Uncle Will had moved away once he fell in love with Jenifer Jareau, his now wife, and you hadn't seem much of him the past few years. But as luck would have it, your nursing career had lead you to a hospital in Fredericksburg, VA. You felt extremely lucky to have family nearby, or else you would have been completely alone. But sometimes you still felt that way, which is why you were so grateful for his offer.

"That actually sounds great! I am off for the next four days, and I didn't really have anything planned. Who will I be meeting at this dinner?"

"Well it's some of JJ's coworkers. They're like a second family to us, and I know they'll be just as welcoming to you. I already told them you moved up here, and they've been begging to meet you."

"Aww I can't wait to see Aunt JJ and my sweet little cousin, Henry! Its been so long since I came to visit you guys. I think Henry was barely two years old the last time I saw him."

"Well we all hope to see you a lot more now that you're here. You're like a daughter to us, Y/N. You are welcome to visit any time you like. I know nursing is a stressful job, and it can take a toll. Its important to have family and friends around you when things get tough." You could hear that this was a genuine offer and you fully planned to take him up on it in the future. Being alone in a new state was taking its toll.

"So where and when should I plan to meet for dinner?"

"I'll text you the address real quick. Everyone is planning to meet around 6. It shouldn't be too far of a drive. It's one of JJ's coworker's houses. David Rossi. He's a real easygoing guy, and he loves cooking for everyone. He loves meeting new people even more, so you should feel right at home!"

"Sounds like a fun time. Thank you again for thinking to invite me. I'm really looking forward to it!"

"Alright boo, talk to you later."

You smiled at the pet name used by the entire Louisiana side of your family. I guess the north had yet to steal his southern roots. You hung up the phone. You finally had plans. It would be nice to talk to someone who wasn't a coworker. It would also be your first excuse to dress up since moving and starting your new job. Too excited to wait, you jumped up from the couch and began to rifle through your closet for something to wear. You didn't want to be too over or underdressed. You grabbed a black spaghetti strap fit and flare dress and throw it on with some black panty hose, a lightweight maroon cardigan, and some black heels. You snapped a quick photo in the mirror and shoot a text to Aunt JJ.

Y/N: Apparently I'm joining y'all for dinner tomorrow night...is this too much???

Aunt JJ: I heard! I can't wait!

And oh my goodness, no! You look gorgeous! It will be perfect.

Also...Henry is so excited to see you!

You smiled, more confident in your choice. Aunt JJ had great taste. You had only had the chance to meet her in person a couple times, but the two of you had clicked right away and stayed in touch over text and Facetime. Sometimes she felt more like the sister you never had.

Starting to feel the effects of your particularly difficult shift, you start to get ready for bed. You wanted to be well rested for tomorrow. You say goodnight to Juneau and crawl into bed, snuggled under all the blankets. You fall asleep with a smile on your face, with the feeling that things in your life are about to take a turn for the better. You couldn't explain it...but somehow you just knew.

#fanfic #writing #criminal minds #spencer x reader #spencerreid #dr spencer reid #spencer reid x y/n #romance #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid angst #original work #original story #Spotify

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katsukikitten · 6 years ago

Note

Hey :) would it be possible to have a fluffy scene with Bakugo taking care of s/o reader who has bad period cramps and suffers panic attacks when they can't take the pain? (The suffering is real lol) Please and thank you 💛

Period Panic

A/N Thank you for being so patient bb. Here is your request and I hope it is fluffy enough and that you like it 😊😊

Your quirk was unique and tricky to get right at first.

You had the ability to make the smallest paper cut feel like a laceration that was bone deep.

Pain amplification is what they called it and for the most part there was no draw back to your quirk.

That was until you got your first period.

Any pain you had amplified was done unto you during those seven days while your uterus shed, angry that you would not be used as a vessel for new life.

Crippling, imobilizing pain that only heightened your anxiety.

Most men and even some women thought you were exaggerating. Brushing off your agony as mere teenage dramatics.

That was until you pushed through the horrific cramping to make it to school only to end up collapsing.

Doubled over, clutching at your gut as if your apendix had burst.

That or your uterus literally burst through your abdomen wall. At least thats what it honestly felt like.

So nothing was new this month, the usual heavy flow and cramping except this particular week your sweet boyfriend demanded he stay home.

It was something you hid from him for years, a mixture of embarrassment and fear of discredit causing you to shy away from his gruff helping hand.

He said he needed to see it all, especially if you were to ever bare his child, how would he know what to do to help you.

But sometimes you didn't even know how to help you. Sleeping most days, getting obscene amounts of overtime and using all of your PTO every month to get out of work since uterus go stabby stabby wasn't a valid enough excuse.

You're curled into his neck, breathing in his sweet caramel musk as he strokes your hair. While his free hand holds his phone watching videos with his wireless head phones.

So far so good. Your period has been mild, Bakugou has been attentive if not borderline smothering although you'll take it considering he is not normally so lovey dovey, and there hasnt been a bad cramp in sight.

Maybe you had grown out of it.

It feels as if a knife is suddenly plunged deep into your gut, before being removed to be swiftly plunged again only a few inches away.

Your bite your lip to keep in a groan, curling into him further. His hand goes from your hair to your back, bringing it up your spine slowly still beautifully ignorant to the intensity.

You needed to keep it this way. Bakugou did not take kindly to weakness and showing how pained you really were was the very definition.

The invisible knife takes a new route, plunging into your back before multiplying, twisting as it finds purchase before stabbing you between the legs.

That one makes you grunt and worry compels the hot head to move.

"Oi." He says voice husky with disuse, "Are you okay?"

You nod in way of answer as your heart rate increases, your skin becoming flush as you feel the rise of panic begin to take hold.

But nothing grips you tighter than the disembodied hands that hold fast onto your uterus, wringing it out as if it were a rag.

You push away from him quickly, between the panic and the pain you're about to empty the contains of your stomach.

You rush to the en suite bathroom in your small apartment sure to lock the door as you grip onto the cool porcielin. Inhaling the all too familiar oddly fresh smell considering the things done to this particular throne.

The scent alone earns a retch that encourages your stomach to heave and heave hard before an even more concerned ash blonde is at the door.

"Y/N." He snarls when he finds it locked.

"Go away Katsu I'll be nnngg." You cannot finish as another column of pain shoots right through you. Your breath hitches and you fight the bile rising up your throat trying hard to even your breathing.

But you lose, you flush as the last of your stomach empties itself into what was once clean porcielin.

"Like hell you were going to say okay. Open the door or I'll open it my God damn self." He growls and this is what you feared most.

Not of his aggression or his inability to take your word for it that you were fine but of him seeing you like this.

Hair damp, clinging to your forehead, cheeks flushed from panic and raise blood pressure. Splattered bile on your shirt and underwear that was now heavily bleed through from the exertion.

He would see you looking every bit repulsive and never want you again.

A loud bang takes place in the bedroom before the door falls off of its hinges landing with a harsh slap on the tile km the bathroom.

His scalding gaze turns tepid with worry when he sees you, going to gather you up but you push away.

"S...stop..." You gasp for breath with sharp inhales, spots begin to form in your peripheral as your body overheats. Useless sweat dripping down your brow.

This was it.

This was the pinnacle moment in time where Bakugou would see you for what you really were.

A fragile glass cup sitting on the edge of a high counter top.

Tears prick your eyes as you think of your uterus falling out of your fucking body with a wet thump.

And Bakugou was going to pack his shit and move out promptly.

The room spins.

He clutches onto your hand with his own strong palm, fingers lacing with yours.

"Copy me baby." He snarls, harshly contrasting his pained look. He holds your gaze as he breathes in through his nose deeply, holding it for a moment and letting the air naturally push out of his lungs through his mouth.

After a few tries you mimic him perfectly slowly regaining your thoughts.

He smooths your hair out of your face before picking you up and setting your on the cool counter.

He steps away to yank up the handle to the bath, steaming hot water pours out, filling the tub. He turns to the linen closet produces a fresh towel and two rags.

He dips one beneath the steaming water before setting the other two items on the vanity top.

"Bakugou..." You fight back tears as he wipes your mouth, folding the rag as he moved along your face. He places the dirty rag in the bowl of the sink before pulling at the hem of your shirt.

"Arms up." He hisses when you resist, you meet his gaze and obey. He pulls the dirty shirt over your head before pulling at your underwear.

"NO!" Embarrassment floods your cheeks and pain bites into your stomach again.

"Fine. I'll turn around but you better get in that bath." He sucks his teeth at the end. He listens as you finish undressing, waiting for the sounds of sloshing water as you adjust yourself.

You see now he has put Epsom salt to help ease your muscles.

Suddenly your chest is tight from a feeling other than panic, as you look at his strong back flexing as he reaches for something at the top shelf of the medicine cabinet.

He produces an orange bottle with white top that you hate. Shaking out two pills for you before wetting a rag in cold water.

"Here." He holds out his hand but you refuse the two white pills with a shake of your head, "Why not?"

"Makes me too numb." You admit and he gives you a look, slamming the pills on the counter before pressing the cold rag to your forehead.

He sits next to you on the floor, scarlet eyes roving over your body for any physical pain that he can see.

You watch it bother him that he cannot help but in these last few moments you've been more in love with him than you ever had.

"S..sorry I'm so weak." You whisper and the air becomes charged.

"When did I say you were weak? When did you need to apologize for something you cannot help?" Your cheeks burn when you realize he did not once look at you in such a way.

"Now focus we are going to do an exercise." He gets up enough to turn off the rushing water before returning to his sit by the tub.

"What do you do to amplify the pain in someone?" He asks and you think of how to word it, normally you just acted on instinct.

"I...I concentrate on their nervous system. I make their body panic and send distress to the brain."

"Can you see your own nervous system like that?" You blink at his question slowly before answering

"Yes. It's difficult but when I really close my eyes." Another sharp pain sinks into your abdomin causing you to wince.

Sharp eyes cut to your feminine pouch he loves so much, he notes that it is a little swollen and silently vows to look up diets better suited for less painful periods.

In his mind food fixed everything.

"So close your eyes." He says, sliding the cool rag over your eye lids. It some how soothes the second heartbeat there that you did not realize you had.

He begins to breathe deeply, like before and out of habit you follow suit until your nervous system stands before you.

A mess of angry nerve bundles through out your lower back and stomach constantly sending messages to your brain as your uterus contracts.

"I...I see it."

"Now do the opposite of activating the nerves. Slow them down or turn them off."

"Bakugou I can't." You go to move the rag, moments away from breaking what you can see before rough hand settles over your eyes.

Applying just the right amount of pressure as it rests there.

"I didn't ask you if you could or couldn't." He says flatly but you can imagine the harsh look in his eyes.

So you listen, you try as you focus, mentally stroking the nerves, begging them to become less hyperactive, one by one they begin to obey.

And your mind numbing pain begins to dull to a light ache.

For the first time since you were eleven you didn't feel as if you were Kane from that iconic scene in that 1980s movie.

You felt like a normal woman who had normal cramps.

You pull at his hand to make eye contact, gleaming with excitement.

"I did it!"

He just smiles in confirmation, as if he knew you could do it all along that is until your face twists and your uterus is being rung out again.

The pain comes flooding back and with it frustrated tears. A slam of a fist agaisnt tile as you let out an audible sob. Bakugou smooths back your hair before tilting your face towards his.

"I will be with you until you can ease your own pain." He kisses your lips gently before adding, "And if for whatever fucking reason you can't I will *always* be here."

He presses his forehead to yours gazing into your eyes and you had never realized how much you needed this.

Him.

That even his support was enough to ease your suffering. He stands, rewets your rag with cold water, places it gently onto your forehead as he returns to normal rough self.

"Now soak in this bath and don't fucking move while I make dinner." He plays soothing music on your phone before slamming the door to the bedroom shut.

Hastily opening google onto his own phone as he makes his way to the kitchen to prepare you a meal plan that will help strengthen the nervous system and dispel inflammation.

Thinking only of how he will always support you, even if it meant putting everything on hold once a month for the rest of his life.

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