#why did i wait until 12 am to write this?? nobody knows
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hi! i’m not sure if you’re taking requests atm but if you aren’t feel free to ignore this!
anyways, i was thinking what would it be like if you were back on base and did something nice for everyone and made their fave coffee/tea while you’re all relaxing after a long mission? like how would the 141 react and what would you make for them?
that’s all but i hope you have a great day and i absolutely love your writings!! they seriously are so detailed and amazing, you do a beautiful job w each one💌
unwind — python333
— — — —
synopsis the 141 + you are back from a super long mission and u make them their fave coffee/tea!!
relationships platonic!taskforce 141 & gn!reader.
word count 3.6k
characters cap. price, soap, ghost, gaz.
warnings 2nd person pov [you/yours/yourself], usage of c/n [code name/call sign], gaz being a little shit.
note thank you so much for the req!! i am taking them right now, but apologies if i post them 2+ days after i get them, my writers block is slowly creeping back into my mind and im fighting it off the best i can! also, thank you for the compliments :3 ilysm youre too nice!! i saw ur reblog of bedbound too and i was so sjdfksdfks!! hope u have a good day too and hope you enjoy this fic, it's all fluff and way too in depth descriptions of making tea/coffee!!

As soon as the electric kettle clicks, signaling to you that the water inside of it has been boiled, you unplug it and pour the water into a mug you’d pulled from the cabinets. It still surprised you that there were any mugs left, with how many people kept stealing to put on their desk to hold pencils—by people, you mean Soap, and only Soap—but you weren’t complaining.
You set the kettle back down once the mug is filled up just an inch below the brim and grab the tea bag you’d grabbed earlier, wrapping the string around the handle of the mug a few times before putting the bag itself into the water. Almost immediately, you see small tendrils of dark brown flow out from the drowned tea bag into the originally clear water.
As that happens, you walk the small few steps over to the small fridge from the kettle and open it, grabbing the small carton of cream and closing the fridge shut. You walk back over to the mug and unscrew the cap of the carton, pouring some cream into the mug, adding a half inch of height to the liquid already in the mug before screwing the cap back on and setting the carton down.
You don’t bother to grab a spoon and mix anything yet, instead reaching over to the small terracotta container beside the coffee machine that contained sugar, and taking off the lid.
You think for a moment if you should grab a spoon for this, but ultimately decide against it, instead just tipping the container over the mug and letting what you hope is two teaspoons of sugar spill over into the mug.
Afterwards, you put the lid back on the container holding the sugar and set it back next to the coffee machine, and grab the cream to put back into the fridge.
Once the cream’s been put back, you open the drawers in the counter and grab a small spoon, one that’s just tall enough that it won’t be fully submerged in the tea, and put it into the mug.
You close the drawer and give the tea a few stirs before picking up the mug, being careful of the scalding heat and holding it solely by its handle. You carefully walk out of the snack bar extension of the kitchen and head towards Price’s office.
After a year or two of working with him, you’ve learned a lot about his tea preferences—he likes Yorkshire tea, the original one, not the gold. He only likes cream and sugar in his coffee, just to make it smoother and make it a bit sweeter, but doesn’t like it too sweet.
You vaguely remember him telling you he’d never had honey or any other sweeteners besides a bit of sugar in his tea, and remember more vividly you thinking, God, that’s such an old person thing to say, but not saying it out loud.
Once you’ve reached his office, you knock a few times and Price’s tired voice calls out, “Come in!”
You open the door, careful to keep the mug from spilling in your hands, and walk in, closing the door behind you. Price looks up from his computer, presumably writing a report on the mission you’d all just come back from an hour or two ago, and offers a small smile when he sees you. He’s about to say something before he catches sight of the mug in your hands.
“Did you…” He doesn’t finish his question, but you know what he was about to ask, and you nod in response.
“If it’s too sugary let me know,” You tell him, setting the mug down a safe distance away from his computer, “I can remake it.”
“I won’t make you remake it,” Price looks at you, almost offended, “You didn’t have to make me anything in the first place, but thank you, I really appreciate it.”
“No problem,” You hum, walking away, saying over your shoulder, “Hope you like it.”
You open the door without another word and walk out, closing it behind you, heading right back to the snack bar. Now for Soap.
Soap typically preferred coffee to tea, despite tea’s popularity in Scotland. He’d told you that he really couldn’t taste the difference between different coffee blends, but upon hearing that there was a Scottish blend, he declared he’d only drink that one, because of course he did.
He pretended he could tell if the coffee he was drinking was of that Scottish blend, but you knew he couldn’t. How did you know? You’d only ever given him Scottish roast once. Every other time since then, it’s been French roast.
He’s never really used a coffee machine for himself, going to cafes or coffee shops most of the time for coffee, keeping his usual coffee order written in his notes app because he couldn’t remember it for the life of him.
He’d sometimes modify his order if certain coffee shops didn’t do certain things that he usually got, but his order stays mostly the same every time he gets coffee. Medium (or grande, if he’s at Starbucks) latte with a double shot of espresso.
Typically, he’d get some shortbread too, but you didn’t really have any in the base, so he’d have to do without it today.
Once you enter the snack bar, you grab another mug from the cabinets above the counter and place it under the coffee machine. You open the cabinets right by the ones that contained the mugs and grab a bag of ground French roast, pulling it out and putting it on the counter.
You open it up and find that there’s conveniently already a small cup in there to scoop the coffee grounds up, and use your free hand to grab a new coffee filter from the same cabinets you got the coffee grounds from, swiftly putting it into the machine.
You use your other hand to scoop up some coffee grounds and put them into the filter, closing the top of the coffee machine afterwards and turning on the machine. You’re grateful there’s more options listed on the small digital screen that lights up on the machine than just plain black coffee, not really in the mood to try and steam milk right now.
You tap on the ‘latte’ option and watch as the screen changes and hear the coffee machine start to whir.
As it does that, you put away the coffee grounds and open up the cabinets that contained mugs once again, pulling out a small espresso glass and setting it onto the counter.
You wait patiently for the coffee to brew, and once you hear the small beep sound from the machine that signals that it’s done, you pull away the steaming hot coffee and set it down right next to the coffee machine.
You quickly put the espresso glass under the machine and start it up again, this time tapping the ‘espresso shot’ option—surprised that’s even an option, honestly—and hearing the familiar whirring noise start up again. It doesn’t take nearly as long as brewing the latte did, the small beep coming much sooner than it did just a minute or two earlier, and you pull away the small espresso glass from the machine almost immediately after you hear it.
You pause for a moment, looking at how much the latte part had filled up the mug, and look around for a moment before opening up the same drawer that contains the eating utensils and grabbing a straw, putting the straw in the still hot latte—is that a good idea? No. Did you do it anyway because you physically can’t think before you act? Absolutely—and taking a long sip of it.
You pull the straw out once the liquid in the mug is at a good inch below the brim and then pour in the espresso shot, setting the glass down after you do so.
You look around for a second for a trash bin and find one just a few steps away from you, quickly throwing out the straw you’d used and then walking back over to the empty espresso glass, picking it up and setting it down by the sink. God forbid we get a dishwasher in here or something, You think absentmindedly as you pick up the mug and carefully walk out of the snack bar with it, Would it hurt to at least get some dish soap in here or something?
You make it out of the snack bar without burning your fingers and start the much longer walk to Soap’s sleeping quarters. You’d caught him walking out of his office in that direction earlier, so you can only assume that he’d gone there.
Once you make it there, you knock on the door a few times and wait for Soap to call out to you and allow you to come in before twisting the door knob and opening the door. He’s laying on his back on his bed, thumb paused on his phone screen as he looks over at you as you enter. He notices the coffee and sits up a bit, grunting as he does.
He wasn’t really as talkative after long missions like the one you’d all been on earlier—usually it took him a day or two to be more social and back to himself, so you didn’t take much offense to him not greeting you as loudly as he usually did.
He nods at the coffee, “Is that for me?”
“Mhm,” You hum, handing him the mug, “Be careful, it’s hot.”
“Got it,” Soap carefully takes the mug into his hands, and softly blows on it before looking at you again and grinning at you, “Weel, thank ye for this. Ye really didnae hae tae.”
“Price actually said the same thing,” You muse, almost to yourself, before speaking a little louder, “No problem.”
“Oh did he?” Soap asks, raising an eyebrow, before his expression shifts and he feigns confusion, “Wait, how come he got a drink afore me?”
“Because his office was closer to the snack bar,” You explain, crossing your arms.
“… Nae, it’s definitely ‘cause ye hate me,” Soap disagrees, shaking his head in mock disappointment, “And tae think I thought we were friends.”
“It is no— you know what?” You begin to argue, before sighing and rolling your eyes, “I do hate you, and we were never friends, you ungrateful piece of shit.”
Soap laughs, quieter than he usually does but it’s still a genuine laugh. He looks down at the coffee again and back at you, before saying, “Thank ye. Again.”
“No problem,” You replied, walking back towards the door and opening it, walking out of Soap’s sleeping quarters and closing the door behind you. Now for Ghost.
Ghost typically liked tea more than coffee, but you think that’s just the British in him talking. Realistically, you could give him either or, and he’d say a polite ‘thank you’ and move on.
From years of being apart of the 141, any preferences or additives he liked to put in his tea or coffee slowly dissipated and instead he just drank either one plain. Which should make the tasks you’ve forced yourself to do today easier, but knowing you, you just couldn’t take the easy route with this.
You remember a conversation with him that happened several months ago where you had been talking about your own tea and coffee preferences. Ghost had commented that he didn’t often put any additives in his own hot drinks anymore, but back before he’d joined the military, he liked to drink keemun tea occasionally with nutmeg in it.
Keemun tea—which was fucking expensive by the way, costing around sixteen pounds for twenty tea bags in every store you could find them in—wasn’t too hard to find, so the next time you went on leave after that conversation, you’d bought a box of bags of keemun tea leaves and some ground nutmeg.
You didn’t let Ghost know about it, and kind of forgot about it just a week after you bought it, but now the memory of you buying it and storing it in the snack bar behind a few other boxes of tea bags has resurfaced and it’s the only thing you think is appropriate to give Ghost at a time like this.
You get back to the snack bar and almost robotically you pull a mug out from the cabinets above the counter and set it down on said counter, deciding to grab another one just so that you wouldn’t have to do it later, and setting that one down right next to the other. You open the cabinet beside that and move some of the boxes out of the way to find the keemun tea box in the very back, right where you last left it.
You snatch it out of the cabinet and open it, pulling out a small packet and opening it up to pull out the tea bag inside. You go ahead and put the tea bag inside of the mug and put the tea box back in the cabinet, closing the small cabinet door afterwards.
You then grab the electric kettle that’s right by the sink and pop open the lid, putting it under the faucet and turning said faucet on, waiting until the water fills a quarter of the kettle. Once it does, you turn off the faucet and put the kettle down right by the outlet on the wall.
You put the lid down and wait for it to click into place before you plug the kettle into the outlet and press the small button below the handle to turn it on, and listen as it starts to make a small whirring noise. You don’t waste too much time just standing there, waiting for the water to finish boiling, instead putting the other mug you’d pulled out from the cabinets under the coffee machine and turning it on.
You tap on the ‘decaf flat white’ option and watch the digital screen change and another whirring sound starts up, now coming from the coffee machine.
You were starting to make Gaz’s while making Ghost’s drink because Gaz often made the mistake of drinking his coffee before it was cool enough to not burn his tongue, so if you made it earlier, it’d have more time to cool, and Gaz wouldn’t have to wait as long before drinking it, therefore solving the whole ‘burning-his-tongue-because-he’s-impatient’ problem he has.
Gaz liked simple flat whites, and sure, he liked tea too, but nothing could top a good flat white for him. He’d get them anywhere and everywhere he can, and you honestly admire his dedication to getting a flat white everywhere he goes.
The coffee machine finished up quickly, a small beep sounding from the machine as it stopped its whirring and a few more drops of coffee made it into the mug before it completely stopped. You pull the mug out from under the machine and set it aside for now, just waiting for the water to finish boiling in the kettle.
Once the kettle clicks and the whirring from that machine stops, you unplug it and pour some water into the empty mug you’d picked out for Ghost, waiting until it’s filled up about a half inch below the brim of the mug before taking the kettle away from the mug and pouring the rest of the unused water into the sink.
You set the kettle down beside the coffee machine where it belongs and check the drawer below the one that held the eating utensils, looking through some of the spices and drink additives in it before finally finding the ground nutmeg you needed.
You unscrew the cap and tilt the small spice jar over the mug, letting some of the powder spill into the mug before tilting it back and screwing the cap back on. You put it back in its spot and close that drawer, now opening the drawer above it and grabbing a small spoon, closing that one after you’ve grabbed the spoon and putting the spoon into the mug to mix the spices in it around a bit.
You leave Gaz’s mug on the counter, hoping that nobody steals it while you’re away, and instead pick up the mug meant for Ghost, carefully walking out of the snack bar with it.
Ghost’s office is fairly far away, but you still manage to get there without burning your fingers or anything on the mug. You knock on the door a few times and wait for Ghost to call out permission for you to come in before you open the door and walk in.
Ghost immediately looks over at you and spots the mug in your hand, but ignores it for now, instead opting to ask, “Did you need something, [c/n]?”
“Not really,” You shrugged the best you could while holding scalding hot tea, “Just needed to give you this.”
You set the mug down on Ghost’s desk before he can say another word, and watch as he eyes the mug with curiosity and confusion.
“What’s this?” He asks, carefully picking up the mug, holding the top up to his nose to smell it. Before you can answer his question, you see his eyes widen and he questions a little louder, “Is this… keemun? With nutmeg?”
“You can tell just from the smell?” You ask, mildly impressed, watching as Ghost’s gaze turns into one more in awe of the mug.
“Yes, I can,” He mumbles, smelling the brim of the mug again, before looking over at you, “How did you know I liked keemun with nutmeg in it?”
“You told me about it, like, a few months ago. Six months ago, maybe? I dunno.”
“How do you remember a conversation from six months ago?”
“It was an important conversation, I guess?” You shrug, crossing your arms.
You watch in silence as Ghost eyes the tea and you take that as your sign to leave, walking towards the door, stopping right in front of it to twist the knob to open it before you’re interrupted by Ghost.
“Wait—” You turn your head and look at him over your shoulder, and immediately upon seeing his face, you think, oh my God is he tearing up? “Thank you, [c/n]. I really appreciate it.”
You offer a small smile and reply, “Yeah, no problem. Enjoy your tea.”
You open the door without another word and close it behind you, taking a deep breath before continuing down the hall back to the snack bar.
You’re relieved when you get there and see the mug, still steaming a bit, still on the counter. You quickly walk over to it and pick it up, walking right back out the door with it and heading straight for Gaz’s sleeping quarters. You remember him being so tired from the mission—you don’t know whether to hope he’s asleep and getting some rest, or to hope that he’s awake so you can properly hand him his coffee.
Once you make it to his sleeping quarters, you knock on the door, and there’s no response for a few moments, making you think he might actually be asleep, but then you hear Gaz’s drowsy voice call out, “You can come in!”
You open the door and see him rubbing the sleep from his eyes and sitting up on his bed, looking over at you. His lips twitch up into a small smile once he sees you and he lets his hand drop into his lap.
“Hey, [c/n].” He looks over at the mug you’ve brought with you, before raising an eyebrow, “You brought something for me?”
“Very bold of you to assume it’s for you,” You close the door behind you and walk closer to him, “But yes, it is.”
Gaz perks up a bit at that and happily takes the mug off of your hands once you hand it to him, and his smile grows significantly bigger once he sees you’ve brought him a flat white.
“It’s decaf, don’t worry,” You say, as if reading his mind, “I figured you’d still want some sleep after drinking it.”
“Always so considerate,” Gaz sighs teasingly, raising the mug to his lips like you’d thought he would. Thankfully, his tongue doesn’t burn this time after he sips the coffee, and you let out a small sigh of relief at the fact.
“You know me,” You respond dryly, crossing your arms as you watch Gaz take a few more sips of the coffee.
“Thank you for this, by the way,” Gaz thanks you, taking another sip of the coffee before stating, “I hope you know you’re my favorite now.”
“Your favorite what?”
“Just my favorite, in general,” Gaz hums, “This is the best flat white I’ve ever drunk. Ten out of ten.”
“Thanks,” You thank him flatly, “It was made with love and a coffee machine I learned how to use yesterday.”
“I can just taste the love in it.”
“Not the coffee machine?”
“Well, it’s a bit concerning if someone can taste the coffee machine in their coffee, innit?” Gaz raises an eyebrow at you before taking another sip of his coffee.
“Not if it’s the one I used.”
“Whatever you say,” Gaz mutters, taking yet another sip of his coffee, making you huff out a small laugh.
“You enjoy your coffee,” You say before walking back over to the door, closing the door behind you as you walk out and letting out a tired breath, starting to head back to your own sleeping quarters.

#cod#cod hcs#hcs#captain john price#john soap mactavish#simon ghost riley#task force 141#kyle gaz garrick#task force 141 x reader#platonic task force 141#platonic task force 141 x reader#tf141#price#soap#ghost#gaz#its 2:17 am as im tagging this#why did i wait until 12 am to write this?? nobody knows#im also listening to those like 7 hr long compliations of markiplier playing random games#because for some reason my brain is more productive listening to him#so theres that#i also discovered that 'author has only watched other people play call of duty' is a tag on ao3?#which is so real btw#everyone else who used that tag is just like me fr
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I Didn’t Mean to Say I Do, but I Do. I Do. 12
Chapter 12 out of 50
Secret marriage of convenience buddie slow burn AU, where Buck and Eddie have been married for years so Buck could adopt Chris and no one at the 118 knows.
In this chapter, Helena and Ramon push too far and Buck finds camaraderie in Hen about custody struggles. However, despite it all, things are looking up.
On AO3.
Ships: Buddie (slow burn), Henren (background)
Warnings: emotionally abusive parents, insecurity, misogyny
~~~
Chapter 12: Dragged Out or Dragged Down
Bobby wants to put himself back out there. Buck is so proud of him, because they’ve all seen him come out of his shell these past few weeks and it’s been an honor and this is a big step. However, right now they’re just teasing the shit out of him. They want to be happy for him, they do, but his profile is too ridiculous.
“You can never show this to a girl,” Buck laughs, reading over what Bobby wrote again, just to check if it’s still the same, because he can’t believe he actually did that.
“Why not?” Bobby asks, maybe pouting a little.
“Okay, this profile is a joke profile for a guy no one ever wants to go out with,” Buck tells him honestly, because if Bobby really wants to get out there, this isn’t the way to do it and someone has to tell him that.
“You know what, maybe you are not the right person he should be taking dating advice from, Buckaroo,” Chimney tells him, snatching the laptop out of his hands.
“And why is that? Because last time I checked, I know how online dating works. I might have been making profiles to find hook ups, but I know what they look like and how to write one when you’re not looking for that,” Buck points out.
“It’s the dating site I used before,” Chimney says, slightly offended.
“Yeah, but it’s not like you were incredibly successful,” Buck shrugs.
“You’re not very successful either, Buckley,” Chimney bites and Buck realizes that might not have been the nicest thing to say.
Still, he defends himself: “Yes, I am.”
“Oh come on, Buck. You embarrassed yourself at your last hook up with her parents, and we haven’t heard you about fucking a girl before that in forever. You’re not even getting numbers on calls anymore,” Chimney rolls his eyes.
“Hey, I still get numbers, I just don’t take them, because I’m a professional,” Buck exclaims, throwing his hands up. “And I’m-” And he’s what? Married? So in love with his friend, he can’t commit to anyone else? Scared to try dating again after he discovered how creepy some women are? “I’m just not looking for anything right now,” he trails off kind of lamely.
Chimney obviously has something to say about that, but Buck happens to meet Bobby’s eyes and there must be something in his own, because Bobby gives him an understanding look. Hen watches that look happen, before shutting Chimney up before he can talk. “Maybe none of us are great at dating.”
“Still trouble at home?” Bobby asks sympathetically. None of them know exactly what happened except for Chimney, but she has let it slip she’s on the outs with Karen.
“Yeah,” Hen replies softly.
“But they’re a great match, they’ll work through it,” Chim interjects with forced cheer, saving her from the conversation furthering. “I set them up, actually. I’m a great matchmaker. I can set you up too if you’d like.”
Bobby looks horrified at the suggestion, but also like he wants to be nice about it, but doesn’t know how. Both Buck and Hen hide their laughter. Luckily, Bobby is saved from answering by the alarm going off.
The call isn’t much, a medical call to a psychic reading place where the guy is already dead before they get there. Though later it turns out he isn’t dead. It makes for an interesting shift and he can’t wait to come home and tell Eddie and Chris all about it.
Then he remembers there will be more people there, who probably won’t find it a fun dinnertime story, even if nobody died.
It’s Wednesday, he tells himself. He won’t be home until dinner, then he has a 24 hour shift on Thursday, so he’ll miss that day. By the time he returns, it’ll be Friday and he’ll only need to have breakfast with them, before they drop them off at the airport and everything will return to normal.
He can do that.
He can totally do that.
Okay, so maybe he totally can’t do that.
After the reprieve of yesterday, it seems they have gathered themselves in their own bubble long enough to become indignant about it instead. Righteous even. They likely didn’t tell Abuela why Eddie left them at that restaurant and Eddie wouldn’t tell her either.
Dinner is fine, a return to normal with pointed comments everywhere, but it goes truly south after dinner when Chris is in bed.
It starts innocent enough with Helena asking: “So you have another shift tomorrow, right, Evan?”
“Uh, yeah, I do. It’s a 24 hour, which aren’t as bad as you’d think. I don’t even mind the 48 hour shifts,” Buck says. “But I’ll be here for breakfast to see you two off.”
“Still, those are long hours. It seems like you’ve barely been home this week,” Helena says.
Buck frowns at that, unsure where this is going. “It’s been a weird week with shifts due to some gaps in the roster. Our house isn’t filled entirely right now, so there are floaters to fill in, but we can’t find one every time. I’ve been working some overtime on the B shift as well.”
“But 48 hour shifts are still a lot. Soon you’ll both be working those and you won’t be home for days, what will Chris do then?” And there it is, what she is really getting at.
“Chris has school and Abuela and tía Pepa. And we have days off too, mom,” Eddie growls.
“Highly inconsistent days off,” Helena argues. “Chris needs stability, a good rhythm to settle in, people he can depend on. You can’t provide that for him here. Let him come home.”
“To Texas?” Buck chokes, realizing what she’s getting at.
She nods. “Chris has loved us being here. He feels comfortable with us. We raised him for a good portion too. He needs the sort of home we can provide.” The ‘and you can’t’ goes unspoken, but it clearly felt by all.
“We can provide for him just fine,” Eddie says voice raising slightly. “And papi is out working long hours too, barely home. What sort of stability is that?”
“I’ll still be there full time,” his mom argues back, her voice also rising.
“Me and Buck will both be here full time!”
“That is not the same and you know it, Edmundo. Come on, do not drag Chris down with you, because you are too stubborn.”
The words hit them both in the solar plexus and both of them stare at her dumbfounded for a moment. Then Eddie gets up angrily, his chair clattering on the ground as he points a finger at his mom. “You did not just say that.”
“Oh don’t be like that,” Helena exclaims.
Before Buck or Eddie can reply to that, a door opens down the hall. A sleepy Chris asks: “What is going on? Why are you all yelling?”
Buck’s heart breaks. They’ve always wanted to shield Chris from the yelling, especially Eddie, especially when the yelling is about Chris. He can see how Eddie wants to comfort Chris and fight his parents, torn between which instinct to follow.
Buck makes the decision for him, ushering him towards Chris as he says: “I got them, you put Chris back to bed.”
Eddie shoots him a grateful smile and they all watch him go down the hall as he softly says: “We were just being silly, mijo. It was nothing. Do you need another story?”
Chris gets herded back into his room and Buck waits until the door falls close behind the two before turning back to Helena and Ramon. In a low voice, he says: “I don’t know what the hell your problem is, but you don’t say that to someone. Especially not to your own kid. We welcomed you into our home, we let you stay here and eat our food. We let you see our kid. And this is what you’ve been doing with that hospitality? No. Hard no. Go grab your stuff.”
“What?” Helena says shocked.
“You don’t talk to us, you gringo,” Ramon adds angrily, coming to his wife’s defense.
“You married one, so don’t even try. I’m driving you to Abuela’s and I’ll explain to her why I’m dropping her adult child on her doorstep in the middle of the night,” Buck hisses. “If you’re lucky, we might let you back in for breakfast Friday so you can say goodbye to Chris before you go, but only if you’re lucky. It’ll be up to Eddie to allow that.”
“We just want to see our grandchild. You’re the one that moved them across the country,” Helena sniffles, suddenly the victim.
Buck hates making people upset, always wants to make it right, but he can’t do that with them. They are Eddie’s parents, which means he forgives them and lets them in over and over again, Buck is the one that carries the grudge, carries the pain. For both of them.
So, he doesn’t comfort her and instead says: “I didn’t move anyone where they didn’t want to go, maybe think about why your child would want to take your grandchild far away from you while you’re sleeping on Abuela’s couch tonight. Now go grab your shit.”
He supervises with as much coldness as he has in him, watching them silently as they grab their suitcases, before they get into his Jeep and he drives them to Abuela’s house.
She opens with confusion as she sees Buck. He rushed up there and let Ramon get their bags from the back, so they wouldn’t get there first. “What is going on, Buck?” she asks.
Tightly he replies: “I hope you don’t mind surprise guests for a night, Abuela. They thought it fit to inform Eddie he’s dragging Chris down with him, I thought it fit to tell them to get the hell out of our house.”
Abuela’s face turns from confusion to understanding to annoyance. She pats Buck on his cheek as she often does and says: “Don’t worry, mijo, I’ll give them a stern lecture. You go home and rest. You have a shift tomorrow, no?”
“I do.”
“Then you need rest, not bullshit,” she says, which makes him laugh. She signs a cross on him for protection, before waving him off her front porch. He doesn’t look at either Helena nor Ramon as he gets back in the car and drives home.
He hopes Eddie doesn’t think he took it too far. It’s not really his place to kick out Eddie’s parents, however, after that stunt it felt justified. Besides, Eddie already left them in a restaurant this week, so it can’t be that much worse.
Still, he’s a little nervous when he opens the door.
But there is no one there. The living room and kitchen are empty and when he peeks into Eddie’s room where his parents have left the door open, that is empty too. Chris’s door is still closed and he figures Eddie is sleeping with him tonight. That’s okay, he’ll tell him tomorrow morning.
Buck brushes his teeth and puts on pajamas, ignoring the sheets that are neatly on the bed, despite him always being too lazy to make the bed, because Eddie’s military training means he always does, so he did that morning. Because he slept there.
However, he isn’t going to be alone all night to overthink, because soon after he’s lain down, Eddie comes in. It’s reminiscent of the other night, but this time Eddie doesn’t ask anything, just comments: “My parents are gone.”
“They’re at Abuela’s house,” Buck says sitting up so he can look at Eddie, who is still in the doorway. “I told them that they might be welcome for Friday breakfast, if you let them, to say goodbye to Chris. They shouldn’t have said that to you. About you.”
Eddie shrinks into himself slightly, then he says: “It was about you too.” He looks up from the floor and looks Buck in the eyes. “They said that shit about you too. Are you okay?”
Surprise and affection wash over Buck in equal measure, before affection wins out. He smiles softly at Eddie and says: “I’m okay. It didn’t feel that personal, they’ve never really taken my contributions seriously anyway.”
“Well, they should. The two of us, we’re doing a much better job than they ever could. I should know, they raised me,” Eddie says, suddenly angry again.
“I don’t think they’ll try anything again anytime soon,” Buck says. “I told Abuela what they said and she didn’t even tell me off for using hell, instead saying she’d give them a stern lecture.”
“You’re a menace,” Eddie grins at that. Then he dims again and softly says: “I want them here on Friday for breakfast, so that Chris can say bye. Is that okay?”
“Yeah, it is,” Buck says, touched that Eddie checks it with him, even though he never expected any different. He grins crookedly: “Maybe they’ll behave a little after getting a lecture from Abuela.”
Eddie huffs out a little laugh, before giving Buck a relieved look. “Thank you.” Eddie pauses, tensing slightly, as he asks: “Can I sleep here again tonight? I don’t feel like changing the sheets.”
“Of course,” Buck says, making space for Eddie, because he’s always going to make space for Eddie. He stays up for quite a bit anyway, anxiously digging through google to ensure himself that Helena and Ramon truly can’t try anything, but Eddie’s sleeping form next to him makes it so he actually gets in a couple hours of rest.
Chris is a slightly confused about why grandma and abuelo aren’t there in the morning, but Buck lets Eddie have that conversation with him, kissing Chris on the forehead and telling Eddie goodbye before he goes to his shift.
Hen looks just as tired and down as he feels. He pours her a coffee, before he sits down next to her and hands it over, smiling at her grateful, “Thanks.”
“So what kept you up tonight?” he asks after she has taken a few sips.
“Karen,” Hen sighs after a moment. “I tried talking to her in a parking lot yesterday. Explain myself, try to get her to come home. I don’t think it worked. She told me she can’t do this right now and then she left. Didn’t say I love you back.” Hen sighs again and stares into her coffee. “Eva – my ex – she’s suing for custody. Denny’s biologically hers. Sure, she signed over custody to me as fast as she could and she’s only just gotten out of prison, but- but I don’t know if we can keep him if we aren’t together. Aren’t a united front. God, I can’t lose Denny. Or Karen.”
And Buck’s heart aches for her, the feeling she’s going through so very familiar. Just a few hours ago, he was listening to Helena and Ramon telling him they wanted to take Chris from him and Eddie. Nothing is more scary than that moment where you can lose your child. Lose your family.
He sits next to her, his arm around her shoulder. She leans into him and lets him hold her. “That’s terrifying, Hen. I’m sorry you’re going through that.”
“Me too,” Hen says with a humorless chuckle.
Her defeated voice doesn’t sit right with him and he bumps against her. “Hey, don’t be so hard on yourself. Signing over custody – and straight away too – that means something. It’s hard for parents to get that back when they give it up, even if it’s during a divorce.” He should know, he looked it up sometime after Shannon left. Just because he wanted to know how permanent her decision is. It is pretty permanent.
“But it doesn’t have to be her that takes him,” Hen says. “What if her claims launch an investigation and CPS deems us unfit to parent? That Karen running off to her mom with Denny is unstable enough that he shouldn’t be with us?”
“That’s not just going to happen, even if it ends in divorce – which knowing you and Karen probably isn’t going to happen, since you have a marriage I aspire to have – then the state of California will treat Denny like any other kid in a divorce,” Buck says. “You and Karen can both provide for him, together and apart. You’re not going to lose them.”
Hen gives him a look. “How do you know that?”
“I, uh- I went on a custody law research kick once,” he tells her, omitting that it was after he moved here and realized his own divorce was imminent and he selfishly wanted to try and keep Chris. He felt so bad about it that he didn’t look at Eddie in the morning and stayed out and had a threesome to try and escape. Not his finest moment.
“Ah,” Hen nods, because that makes sense to her. Buck often has random facts about all kinds of topics, this isn’t an out of character thing for him. Then she smiles and says: “Thank you, Buck. I needed to hear that.”
“It’s okay, having people in your corner makes it all easier to deal with. The people at this firehouse are in your corner,” Buck says honestly, because he knows these people have his back every day and he knows he needs them on the days it feels like Eddie will slip through his fingers, even though he usually knows better, because Eddie had his back first.
“You’re a sweet kid. I’m glad to have you at this house,” Hen tells him and it feels like acceptance, like family. Like he’ll have people sitting on his side of the aisle if he ever does get married for real.
“Thanks,” he beams at her.
She shakes her head fondly, then shoulder bumps him, before draining her coffee and going to greet Chimney, who is just coming up the stairs.
The rest of their shift rolls by smoothly with some medical calls and a small fender bender. It’s a medium shift, not quiet – though Buck would never use that word – nor too busy. A perfectly good shift all in all. Buck can use it after the night he’s had.
He gets some sleep on one of the cots in the bunk, but rushes his breakfast. It’s not that he is looking forward to breakfast with his in-laws, but he also doesn’t want to leave Eddie on his own to fend them off.
Of course the others notice Buck is half standing as he shoves the final bites of required family breakfast in his mouth, so he can go down and change into day clothes to face- well, to face required family breakfast. Chimney asks: “What? You got a breakfast date or something?”
“If you want to call it that,” Buck snorts, letting them make their own assumptions about what he means, before he calls out a goodbye and makes his way downstairs.
Coming home, the air feels a little stifling, but he can hear Chris happily chattering away in the kitchen, so he lets his shoulders relax slightly. When he enters the kitchen, Chris cuts himself off to excitedly exclaim: “Papi!”
“Hey, Superman,” Buck greets with a smile, nodding as politely as he can to Helena and Ramon, before catching Eddie’s eyes and quirking a brow. Eddie smiles in return and he lets himself relax even more.
Chris doesn’t notice the silent communication and instead informs him in a thrilled voice: “Daddy is letting me miss the morning of school so I can come to the airport and wave grandma and abuelo goodbye, isn’t that cool!”
Buck immediately understands that Eddie allowed that to have a human shield between the four of them, before they go to avoid any more yelling. He doesn’t show that, instead matching Chris’s enthusiasm as he says: “That’s very cool, buddy.”
They eat their breakfast, then pile into the car. This time Ramon also in the backseat and Buck in the passenger seat. Eddie turns on the radio and Helena spends the entirety of the drive busy with Chris, while the rest of them sit in silence.
During the goodbye, it’s also mostly Chris-centric. It’s as if there is an unspoken agreement to just not talk about anything. Helena must be burning to say something, anything, but she keeps her mouth shut. If the circumstances were different, Buck would commend the restraint.
After they’ve hugged and kissed Chris to death, telling him that he is always welcome in their home (which doesn’t make both of them tense and frown, no sir), they do also say goodbye to them.
Eddie gets a handshake from his father and a quick hug from his mother, while Buck gets a nod from both of them. He just nods back.
There was a time when he felt excluded from the family, but he has long since figured they never considered him a part of it anyway. Only Eddie and Chris do that and out of the two of them, Helena and Ramon only really seem to like Chris, so doesn’t take it too personally. At least, he tries not to.
They stand and wave until the two of them have disappeared, because Chris declares that it is the only right way to wave at someone. Though, Buck suspects he wants to milk his morning free and away from school. It’s not that he dislikes school, Chris loves it actually, but the giddy feeling of being allowed to do something naughty has him in high spirits anyway.
The two of them drop off Chris together. It’s not entirely novel, but certainly not a usual thing either, but Buck strangely enjoys it as he drives them there.
Both of them hug Chris and give him a kiss on the forehead, before leaving him to go to class, signing him in under the watchful gaze of the school secretary, who is definitely judging them.
They keep it together in front of her, but giggle a little when they get to the car. Buck can’t tell if it really was that funny or if both of them are just relieved they survived the visit from Helena and Ramon and this is the way to let it all out, but he doesn’t care, just enjoys the moment.
At home, Eddie goes to work out, changing into his work out clothes so he can go on a run. Buck reminds him to take his keys, because he’s getting groceries, so he won’t be home to open the door for him if he forgets. Eddie rolls his eyes that it was one time.
Once Eddie is gone, Buck strips the beds, feeling a little dramatic as he mentally compares it to cleansing the house of a presence. But it doesn’t feel too wrong either.
With the first load in the washing machine, he makes a list, before getting into his car and getting enough groceries for the week. He’s careful not to forget anything, because starting Monday, it’ll be more of a hassle to organize picking up things they’ve forgotten.
When he gets home, Eddie is just coming out of the shower. Eddie takes over laundry duty, while Buck meal preps. It’s nice and domestic with Buck singing off key to a playlist while Eddie pretends to grimace and cover his ears, even though Buck catches him bopping his head along with the songs as he folds the laundry when it’s done.
That night, they have a movie night with Chris having his own popcorn bucket as promised. Right before he goes to sit down, he gets a text. It’s from Hen and only reads: Karen came home. Thank you.
He couldn’t have stopped the smile if he wanted to and just texts back how glad he is for her and that he knew it. Then he turns off his phone to focus on his own family, getting some popcorn in the face for daring to delay the sacredness of movie night by checking his phone real quick.
Before he knows it, it is Monday and he’s not only packing Chris’s lunch, but Eddie’s too. He is starting the academy and it feels like a fresh start. But also fucking terrifying. On top of everything else that happened during their visit, Helena and Ramon didn’t exactly leave either of them reassured about the coming period.
However, Buck wants to believe this is going to be okay, that they can do this. And if they can get through the academy, they can get through both of them working. He needs them to get through this, hence the obsessive meal prepping, which should – in theory – make for a smoother ride.
Eddie of course knows why he does it, but he doesn’t comment, just taking the bag Buck hands him with a smile, before calling out: “Come on, mijo, time for school. You don’t want to make daddy late on his first day, right?”
“I’m coming, I’m coming,” Chris calls, stopping by Buck for a moment to ask: “Papi, kiss goodbye?”
“Of course, Superman,” Buck grins, kissing his forehead before quickly ushering him to the door as he laughs: “Now hurry before daddy gets anxious.”
“Not anxious,” Eddie pouts as he opens the door.
“Sure you aren’t,” Buck grins, watching Chris race off the steps, Eddie right behind him. “You’re gonna crush it!” he calls out.
Eddie gives a small fist bump back, because deep down he’s as much of a dork as Buck is, before he buckles Chris in and gets into the car himself. As he watches the two of them drive off, he still feels nervous, but also a little settled.
They can do this, Helena and Ramon don’t know shit. United front and all that, just like Karen and Hen will be.
~~
A/N:
I hate the catfish storyline, so I shall not be including it here :D (I also dislike the Hen cheating storyline so much, but it fit thematically here, so alas)
Also, whoooo! I got through season 1 and it only took me like 5 chapters, I honestly feared worse lmao. Let’s see how season 2 will go when Eddie is also there xp (though he needs to get hired first)
#rr writing#secret marriage of convenience buddie au#the i do verse#9-1-1#9 1 1#9 1 1 show#9 1 1 fanfiction#9 1 1 buddie#911#911 show#911 fanfic#911 buddie#buddie#buck x eddie#buck buckley#evan buckley#eddie diaz#christopher diaz#buckley diaz family#helena diaz#ramon diaz#bobby nash#chimney han#hen wilson#the 118#henren#buddie au#buddie slow burn au#slow burn#tw: emotional abuse
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You said you've been writing down (or rather, typing up) whatever comes to your head when you first wake up. Would you be comfortable sharing some of the things you've written?
Sure, I see no harm in that. Some of the dates are a bit off due to me forgetting what days I had or had not accounted for.
Also, this will probably have a “read more” section bc this is LONG.
6/1/24
pasta would be better without the wait time. Why can’t it be packaged like udon?
6/2/24
No, I’m not paying for your tax write-off of a vacation
6/3/24
I’m not a monster. I’m not a creature. I’m not a god. I’m human. I’m normal. I’m perfectly normal.
6/6/24
Just like the coocoo bird effect,I killed my false parents. Dug my teeth into their flesh and tore and shred until there was nothing left. Only blood and bone shards.
6/7/24
cheese. not celery. CHEESE. Worst salsa de queso ever
6/9/24
I want chocolate
6/10/24
Feigning humanity only starves me further.
6/11/24
They worship the very thing that will kill them. They know it’ll kill them. Why do they expect appreciation from an old deity?
6/12/24
el conejo es muy delicioso
6/13/24
Tear, rip, shred, filét, slice, stab, scratch, do what I want. I’m so hungry and so angry.
6/15/24
Need to make friends. I’m so lonely
6/16/24
You’re a fucking liar. Go kill yourself.
Better yet, let me do it for you, pathetic waste of flesh.
6/17/24
I’m not a monster. I’d never eat that. I’d never do that. Nobody should worship me.
I’m just a normal human.
6/18/24
Kitty cat!! In car!! I want a pet kitty!
6/21/24
Those macarons were so fucking good. I should go get some more. Vanilla and pistachio
6/22/24
Beach
6/23/24
Water would be nice. It’s so hot
6:24/24
Mayonnaise is such a weird condiment
6/28/24
Cookies and cream flavored milkshakes are the best thing to grace the shelves of my fridge.
6/29/24
How much could a creature possibly need to eat? So many lives lost.
7/1/24
Sleep is for the weak
7/2/24
God, please let me sleep
7/3/24
Sleepy time tea
Check the mail
7/5/24
Cult. It’s a cult. They’re in fucking cult.
They worship the same thing that warned me about them
7/7/24
Don’t let them know
I know
I’m starving
7/9/24
Cake pops would sell so good on campus.
7/10/24
What do you mean you want a cheeseburger combo with no cheese. That’s just a hamburger combo.
No, a combo is just the burger and fries, you’re thinking of a meal. The meal has a drink with it.
7/11/24
I fucking hate fast food, oh my god
7/12/24
My thoughts get louder at night. Just when I think things are changing.
My thoughts get louder at night.
The insistent need to tear and rip and shred. I’d never, though.
I’m not a monster.
Right?
7/13/24
Shut up, you can make your own damn french fries.
7/14/24
I deserve a pay raise
7/15/24
That guy is not even real. Why does everyone think he’s stalking me?
7/18/24
It’s raining so much. I hate hurricane season
7/19/24
Can I PLEASE make it to work without driving through a literal flood??
7/20/24
Burger
Fries
Milkshake?? Eh, ice cream is better
7/21/24
Hunger. It’s all I feel. No matter how much I eat, I’m always hungry.
Maybe I’m not eating the right thing.
7/22/24
My teeth itch every time one of you talks. You’re all so annoying, I just wanna bite out your jugulars.
7/23/24
Bacon jerky
7/24/24
Something claws from deep within, begging for just a taste. Just a drop, a shred, a chunk, a bite.
I don’t want to eat that. That’s gross. But my brain tells me otherwise.
7/25/24
I’ve been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate, a poet
A pawn and a king
7/26/24
How many lives did they truly live? How many times did they all repeat that same, vicious cycle.
How lucky am I to be an outside viewer.
An observer
7/27/24
Kimchi jiggae and a big ass bottle of strawberry caplico
7/28/24
I want strawberry milk
7/29/24
He’s not the guardian. He’s the voyeur. That fucking liar. You’re just as bad as your captor.
8/1/24
Mmmm steamed egg
8/2/24
Vanilla ice cream
No, strawberry
#alternate reality game#arg#rpg#slenderverse#slenderverse inspired#unfiction#unreality#everymanhybrid inspired#everyman hybrid#everymanhybrid#tribetwelve inspired
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Hi Clouds!
For Aruani writer ask game :3
1 2 3 5 7 10 11 12 14 16
You sure didn't hold back haha <3 Alright, let's do this
Share your favorite part of your latest fic
.... my latest fic was a PWP :|
BUT if we're gonna keep it PG, then it's got to be the first quarter where Annie asks explicitly for the baby
if not then that bit about Armin being super focused on doing it right but still not noticing that he's going extra hard everytime he looks at her
2. Share your favorite part of your first ever fic
That's gonna be Black Water! Almost at 130k I have a lot that I love about it, parts that I'm especially proud of. But I guess the first chapter will always have a special place in my heart, the before the last scene were Armin and Annie make up and make out in the kitchen
3. If you look back at your first fic compared to your last, what's changed?
If we're gonna be technical, the length of paragraphs. I feel like I've gotten more comfortable with words and how I can use them to describe settings and emotions, in particular. (Also i've gotten better at filth lol)
5. Write about Armin and Annie's first meeting! Could be in anon setting or any other AU
When it comes to aot, I'm in love with the canon the most. For Armin and Annie, I don't think it was a love-at-first-sight type of situation. I don't think they paid much attention to one another until their personalities started to show: Armin brave, determined, and intelligent, and Annie secretly a nice and sweet person
7. What was the inspiration behind your shortest fic?
Answered here
So I'll do my second shortest fic! ... which is also a PWP :| (DAMMIT ANNA!)
Nothing special about Talk your shit, just some good ol' brainrotting that got out of hand thanks to @moonspirit
10. Write about their first kiss! (could be in tweets, screenshots, etc)
I'm a firm believer that Annie kisses him first after waiting for forever for him to do it. It's very short and shy and dainty and just "a question" on the state of their relationship.
11. What annoys you the most about your own writing habits?
Answered here
I think that's my main qualm, everything else I can manage and is part of the overall joy and charm of writing
12. What's a trope you'd never write? why?
I have a lot that I'd find unpleasant to write, but one that comes to mind right now is infidelity. I'm here to write love stories at the end of the day, no matter how angsty and tragic the journey might be. I get that it's just storytelling and some people may be able to develop their characters well in that scenario, I'm just not interested and likely never will be
14. Tell us about a detail you wrote that nobody commented on
Answered here
Another detail... Can I say Annie's pregnancy scare? I know a lot of people said they weren't surprised by the poll I did a while ago, but considering they've been careful in all the other smut scenes in the fic, I thought it'd raise some flags
16. Share a WIP you're excited about
I don't think I have solid WIPs right now besides the final chapter of BW. but I AM excited about coming back to Slow and steady plus a couple of one-shot and two-shots rather than something full-blown. I'm especially excited to write a sick-fic, them eloping, some Armin-centric stuff, and maybe even explore the world of BW with side-fics and one-shots
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Calaborne As Outwoods: HighLand WonderDrug (process so far)
When writing the first episode from December 25, 2024, I was thrilled, but I wasn't a big fan of writing chapter one because I was not great at making a good beginning at the time. At the end of episode one, I want to make a series about being a musician with free will and sharing whatever you want. The art from the start, I was using my laptop to color, and it wasn't that great until I got an Apple Pen, and it worked for a couple of episodes. Until I kept using it and made good coloring and shading, which I was very impressed with. I used to color my art from the laptop, till this day I do that for my doodles (no wonder why it looks strange). The first episode was not my favorite because I tried to make an impactful episode one, but as I kept the story rolling as the main theme of the main heroes fighting the 27 Club and The Beatles, I got better with the story and coloring. Since episodes 1 to 11 were with the weird coloring, line art, and story, I am learning how to use the iPad, and it does work well with the Apple Pen. Episode 12 to 27 was the days I work in home as a freelancer and still have good process with the art and coloring with experimenting brush strokes and layering mostly lightening public domain or borrowed images online. Episodes 28 and 29 were the days we went to Washington, D.C., and did the line art while we traveled, waited for food in restaurants, and rested in the hotel rooms. I am a quick drawer, but manage to keep the details perfect.
Episodes 30 to 33, I play alot with coloring to get the acid trip vides based on the 60s, but it is more like I am going crazy with any art in the panels.
In episode 34, the rest, I work at a restaurant that has a slow day. I hid my tiny sketchbook and drew the line art, and it was hard at first, but since I know how to edit art from the iPad. Even when it's my days off, I finish this season on time, and still today, I work where the job market is not good, and this job I work now is just a necessity in my life. My comics are more important than that.
Highland WonderDrug is inspired by my artworks with experimental and colorful techniques, and since I love the 60s and the style, I do want to make Drug Angels. Along with Harmony Angels, since I love to listen to music, and Harvest Angels, since I love eating fruit. Adding music to this series was something not new to me since I did Marx Brothers: Let Lemons Lie for the first part of the series. The them of music and free will is that music is just something to be free from the dread and message about what the artist think and want to say, since the real world, rarely musicians do not have their own rights to sing their part but instead, cooperations would use them for cash-grabbing with the worst types of music nobody cannot bare. Melodyia is named after Meloletta from Pokémon, and her character as a trapped singer can teach people who were in a creative trap need to escape and be themselves to pursue their goals. Just like the same thing goes for actors and actresses, the inspiration for Muse's character was from Millennium Actresses, where the female main character sees acting and reality from a different point of view, and how she feels very out of place at the end. It feels like a new character in life when acting, and I grow to this as the philosophy between self vs self is just how Muse wants to escape the abuse and not so of his character. Later in season 1, it transitions from escaping the music and acting industry to killing famous singers.
The Orange Harvest Angels are inspired by The Jackson 5, where Orange is heavenly inspired by Ice Spice, Clementine is inspired by Clementine from TellTales Walking Dead. Manderain is inspired by Michael Jackson, Tangelo is inspired by any Lakers players, and Tangerine is inspired by Muhammad Ali. I do like having theme as part of the main cast for now and sadly will never be part of season 2 and three.
Glass Staineyes is inspired by Bob Dylan as he is poetic, but an Ender Demon who is just the most philosophical person ever.
Vivian is inspired by Cher since she has weird eyes and has a lot of style in the 70s. DreamCatcher is inspired by the idea of dreamcatchers and the many acid trips people went through back in their days.
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I don’t write on here often but I don’t really have anywhere else to go.
I’m disabled and very mentally ill. Same as a lot of people, but I feel like I never get a good day. It’s always “you need time to heal, give yourself a break”. I feel like all I’ve been doing is resting and it doesn’t seem to make a difference. I’m constantly trying my best to get better and the second I think I’m making progress it’s something new.
You need to go to the ER. You need to take these medications. You need to rest. You can’t go to work. You need to pay these bills. How can I pay the bills if I can’t work? How do I make progress if all I can do is lay around waiting to get better? When will I get better? When will anything get better? How can I give myself a break and be more gentle with myself when I grew up around so much negativity?
“My child is not special”. “You just need to try harder”. “You’re a child, you’re not in pain”. “Stop lying”.
“You’re a teenager, of course your body is going to hurt. You’re growing. Just take more pills and you’ll be fine”
“There’s nothing wrong with you. Stop being dramatic. I go through way more than you and I’m still working and not bitching. There’s nothing for you to be depressed about. You have it so easy”
No. I didn’t. You neglected me and I was forced to be an adult as a child. I raised more children that I can count. I drove the van at the age of 12 because you were drunk at the bar on a Wednesday. I was parenting my parents. Nobody ever believed my pain and now I’m 21 unable to work because I was so ignored that I got no help. There is no help. There is no medication. There is no cure. There isn’t anything I can do to fix any of this. “I’m sorry, doctors don’t know enough about your problems to help you. We can no longer help you. You can try this medication for these other issues but they are not for you. You will trip out until there’s no color left in your eyes. No doctor will contact you to tell you to stop taking these medications and you will have life long side effects.”
Stay positive? Ive been seeing creatures crawling on my ceilings since I was a toddler. The walls are breathing and hands are touching me through the walls. I’m seeing faces in trees and the shadow figures look at me with no expression. Why do I feel their pain? Why do I wish I was dead? Why did I pray to a god I didn’t believe in just because I was told he’d save me one day? Why haven’t I been saved? Why was I lied to? Why am I like this?
“Why dont you hangout with friends?”
What friends are you referring to? The ones who left because they couldn’t handle hearing how badly I wanted my pain to end? The friends who used me for my money because they knew I felt the pain they were going through and they used me until they were better off without me? The friends who couldn’t understand what having DID is like? The friends who fell in love and couldn’t be in my life unless they had me to themselves? The friends who made me sacrifice so many parts of myself until I couldn’t see myself in the mirror? What friends are you talking about?
“Where’s your family in all this?”
The alcoholic, pedophile, narcissistic, manipulative, victim complex, emotionally unavailable, physically abusive, neglectful, egotistical, strict Catholic, compulsive liars, ableist, homophobic, boomers, divorced parents that couldn’t give a fuck about anyone but themselves?
I left at 17. My mother was stealing from me and my family didn’t like that I was the “black sheep” of the family. I need no Shepard for I am not a sheep.
I started from pennies in my pocket. No car. No home. No job. No knowledge of anything other than what my family programmed into my brain to be a slave to whatever they needed me to be. I had nothing.
I’m supposed to be happy? Positive? Hopeful? I slept in a wooden toy chest hoping I wouldn’t wake up as a child . I was so little. Nobody believed a goddamn word I had to say. I’m severely traumatized and disabled.
I’ve been with my partner of almost 4 years who I jokingly gave the name “caretaker” in my phone just for it to unironically become the truth. I feel so much guilt for needing someone to take care of me and help me with everything. I hate that I’ve taken away so many chances for him to have a “normal” life.
I’ve put him through so much shit and he’s still here. It took me over 3 years to get therapy. Only after he broke up with me because I was planning my suicide. He himself was suicidal and didn’t say anything because he didn’t want me to feel bad. He cared more about me than himself and I hate I put him in that situation. He loves me everyday and I can’t seem to love myself for a second. How does he do it? How does he look at me and see love after everything we’ve gone through?
How do I keep going knowing I’m taking away his chances of having a good fulfilling life? Probably won’t get married because why waste money on someone who’s more than 95% going to kill themselves when the time comes? Won’t be having kids because who wants to pass on so many disorders and disabilities to a child? Why adopt just to be shamed for taking in a child when you can’t give them a normal life being a disabled parent?
I’m positive I make my therapist uncomfortable because I can’t seem to go more than two days without talking about how easy everyone’s life will be once I’m gone. “They will miss you”. They definitely won’t miss hearing me bitch about how shit my life is and how there’s nothing i or anyone else can do to help me or fix me. They won’t have to help me with everything. They won’t have to worry about me at all because my body won’t be an issue. My pain won’t be relevant. They will have such an easy life when I’m gone.
I was writing suicide notes at the age of 9. Writing to myself on my birthday because who tf cares about the stick bug you call a girl. The pale and frail. “Look, I can wrap my hands around your waist and my fingers touch.” Awesome having everyone carelessly speak about my size and furthering my eating disorder.
There is nothing for me to look forward to. There’s no light at the end of the tunnel. The grass is not greener on the other side. The roses do not smell sweater. The water will never sit still. Everyone leaves and I hop on the pity train with my fucking clown shoes.
“You are dead to me.” “You are a selfish person.” “You aren’t important, I already replaced you.” “You have zero direction.” “You’re going nowhere.” “I hope you hurt every single day until you rot alone.” “You’re a coward.” “You’re a dark rain cloud with nothing good to say.” “You’re just as angry as your dad.” “You play the victim just like your mom.” “You’re a child.” “You let everyone take advantage of you.” “You will be temporary for everyone who comes into your life.” “You will never be cured.” “Do you know how easy it would be to get rid of your body since there’s nothing there.” “You’re so easy to take advantage of.” “ There is zero empathy in your body.” “ You’re dying anyway.” “You’re so fake.” “You can’t even be a person.” “You’re so lost in your delusions.” “I don’t think you’ve ever told the truth.”
Things I’ve been told by people who “loved” me. By family. By friends. By ex bestfriends. By coworkers. By strangers. And I’m supposed to just get over it? I’m supposed to move on? I just need to move past all that? There is nothing to save me from this.
I’m a burning fire waiting to be put out. I’m choking myself out with my own thoughts. I’m smoking everyday hoping my lungs give out just for my ribs to be pushed to the surface until I can’t sit still. The bugs under my skin whispering the things I’ve been told on repeat for years.
It will never change. I can never change. The change I make is irrelevant to anyone because they see the same depressed girl who gave up so early in life and has no direction. I will make it nowhere in life except the cemetery I sit at alone because there’s nobody there to shame me. There’s nobody to tell me it’ll be better. It’s quiet. It’s calm. There’s no shame in sitting with the dead.
When was there every light in my eyes? When was there a life worth living?
I know nobody will read all of this, I know nobody will listen or understand. I know that I will be gone one day and it will change nothing. The world keeps turning and I will finally;Finally get the rest I needed.
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Note 12: Rage and Pain
hello. it's 2024, and its been a year since i last posted. not to say in the least that ive been better. ive been tolerating, i feel like is the right word. but what made me write this now is my ongoing anguish with life, with family, with work and in general, with myself. new year, new me right? the things we tell ourselves hoping for better times, less painful moments. to keep that hope is good yet blinding and painful at the same time.
i drove to work and home today. as i was on the way home, being the ever-so reserved daughter and woman i am, talked to myself about my problems, about my mental anguish and about my sadness. i feel like its nothing new. ive been posting about pretty much my depression here as an outlet for a lack of a better term. in talking to myself, did i let my tears fall. in talking to myself, did i realize that i truly am alone in this world. to share my pain with no one else. to have nobody understand the things i want to share, the deeply rooted sadness that contains me in every day i live, i breathe in the world. its no secret here that my family is the number one source of my rage yet my pain at the same time and this is because of my love for them. truly a curse i dont think ill ever get up from. and i wanted to write here again to let this out. my words are slurring and i feel tears well up inside me yet all i can do is mask them in front of the people i so desperately want to cry to. its pathetic and its sad really. im turning 25 this year and yet my secret wants and desires still stem from things i shouldve gotten over 10 years ago.
its in this that the sadness in my heart continues to spread its roots. i had to cry by myself to sleep this week bc of how inconsiderate they are and of how invalidated, unappreciated and unloved i felt from the people i care about my family. i know the most obvious thing to do is to talk to them but when you've tried and tried and it never worked, why would u bother?
tw/ self harm, suicide
ive thought abt killing myself honestly, its gotten that bad these past months. idk if ill ever feel good about myself if its always just temporary. the greatest downs are complemented with the greatest highs. like im in a soap opera waiting for my great climax and my great downfall at the same time.
and yet again as im writing this down, im silently killing the hope in me that ill ever feel okay about this. ive been reading books to meditate, to recenter myself, to feel.....something. instead of slicing my skin, instead of feeling the blood trickle down, i want to try to be better.
until then, im just a fire running on fumes ive never wanted to use in the first place.
and if there is a god up there and if there is an angel silently watching my every move, i pray that i do feel better without needing my family for it.
oh a tragedy, and yet the comedy that is my life
-end-
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Monday, October 23, 2023
I couldn't sleep last night. I guess I just have too many thoughts ravaging around in my head. Some may say it's wedding stress, some may say it's life in general. But those people aren't me, and those people don't know what is really going on inside of my head.
It's like this...I have a bachelor's degree in Television and Digital Media. I absolutely loved working on television and film sets, and editing audio was my passion. The problem? I graduated in May of 2020. There...wasn't exactly going to be any companies hiring at that point in time. Not for lack of trying, though! I searched far and wide, high and low, even considered relocating across the country just to find a job in my dream career! But... it was no use. There was absolutely nothing. Anything that was hiring, wanted more years of experience that I just could not give them as a recent college graduate. It was hard, and I was devastated. So, I took a semester off to figure out some new plans.
One semester later, I decided to try for a new goal. I was very much inspired by all of the teachers during COVID-19, and I decided that I wanted to be like them. So... I enrolled in a Master's program, and started my journey towards a Master's in Education. I have a semester and a half left to go with that. However, I did get fully certified as of last May! My certification is in Social Studies, 7-12. I just need to finish a few more courses for the actual Master's Degree. I can still teach though! I applied for jobs all summer long. With the teaching shortage, finding a job should be easy, right?
Wrong. The amount of times I was turned down...felt like insanity. Every interview I went on asked new questions that caught me off guard that I just did not know how to answer. These school districts wanted more than just student teaching experience. But how am I supposed to get more experience, if no school district will hire me to get that experience? Application after application, interview after interview... Eventually, September came around, and I was still jobless.
It doesn't end there. I decided that I needed to make money. I mean, I have a wedding to help pay for, after all. I applied to be a substitute teacher at one of my local school districts. I was accepted there immediately, thank god. It's a decent gig, I mean, I can choose when I want to go in, when I don't want to go in, what classes I want to be in for, stuff like that. The problem? I have been a substitute for 2 months now, and I have only be in the Junior High School once. Every other school I have been in has been elementary schools, which I am not certified in whatsoever.
Okay Dani, so, why is this a problem? Well. I have been getting sick. Every other week. Because of these kids. I was not an Elementary Education Major, so I was not warned about that part of the profession. I just missed a whole week of work last week due to a double ear infection that I no doubt caught something from the kids that I've been with. Which means, I'm missing work anyway and not getting paid. Am I even working at all?
Along with that, I'm starting to second guess my choice of being a teacher in general. The teaching profession is only getting worse. Admin do not care at all about the lives of teachers or their mentality. They really only care about themselves. They let violent children in classrooms without a BHT. I once had a violent child throwing things at me, and nobody did anything to help. I just had to stand there and wait for him to calm down. I am not trained in that sort of thing. I should not have to deal with that. Nobody should.
Teachers constantly have to bring work home. Grading, lesson planning, writing emails to parents and responding to admin. Not only that, but they don't get told things until the last possible second. I may know that I'm supposed to be in a classroom a week in advance for a teacher to do extra training, but that teacher won't know until the night before, and have to scramble to put a lesson plan together for me, the sub, which 9 times out of 10 is incoherent and I just have to do my best. But I can't blame the teacher for that. They didn't have the time to properly write things out for me.
Also as a teacher, I will be spending more time with other people's children, then my own someday. It just does not seem fair in the slightest bit.
I love teaching, don't get me wrong. But I hate everything that comes with it.
So now I'm left here. What am I supposed to do now? I am 25 years old. I can't go into more debt to try to figure out a different career path. I do know that I love being creative. I love creating things. But I'm just not sure where that can get me. I can't just... become a content creator, or an author, or something like that. I feel like I have let a lot of people down because I am failing at a second career. Even just now, I checked my sub portal, and a job popped up...and the name of the teacher is actually one of my classmates who also just finished her certification. If she was able to land a position, why couldn't I? Why am I having so much trouble?
I apologize that this post was so long. I honestly just have so much on my mind that I needed to get out somewhere. If anyone has any thoughts, ideas, advice, anything at all, do not hesitate to comment or message me or, idk, give some words of encouragement. I'm going through it right now.
#teacher problems#send help#mental health#stress#mentally fucked#struggle#burnout#rant post#personal rant#rambles#ramblings
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- because I’d stressed her out, my work ethic, had stressed her out, so I rarely said “No I haven’t done it yet” but then if I said “Yes I’ve done my homework” then now I feel like I have to keep up the facade of having already done my homework in case she pokes her head in again because I feared punishment and also the stress I would cause her (especially if she caught me in a lie) and so that facade would throw a wrench in my plan and I’d have to wait until she went to bed and then try to get it all done, but until then I’d just have to lay around in bed all day and oh my fuck I think that’s why I do that so much I think that’s where it stemmed from I think that habit of laying in bed to show mom that I was “already done” and then having to maintain that front is at least partially why I am so fucking lethargic now. What was once a survival strategy has morphed into the fucking norm. Also growing up in a household where Christianity was enforced (Coming from a Christian currently in a period of doubt) - btw I don’t blame my parents for any of this, especially with some of the shit my older sister put them through/they put themselves through because of her, it’s probably really hard to get past the desire to shape your child into what you want them to be and it is hard to deal with stress, especially when you’re my mom and especially when it’s fears about someone you love and do not have control over, I love my parents for the record - anyways yeah also growing up in a house where Christianity was enforced. I’m not sure how exactly to put it into words but I know what I’m talking about when I say that. It wasn’t like “live laugh love, crosses everywhere you look,” but the ideals were expected, and there was shame if you did not meet those expectations. I hid my failures, my growing addiction to porn, my music, my swearing, my weaknesses, my questions of “am I sure I’m not a girl?” (still dunno! but I’m getting closer to the answer I think!), etc. The constant repression and shame of being some sort of failure, “why do I struggle with this? Why does nobody else?” has really fucked me up over the years. I never really thought that maybe other people have these problems too, because I also hid my general confusion on how life works and what people normally do with their lives. I never knew what people were “supposed” to do, how they used their time, how they spent time at home. I never really knew how life typically went, and nobody ever told me. Nobody ever told me that normally people do a bunch of extracurricular things outside of school and hang out with their friends somewhat frequently and connect with people and set up times and dates for stuff and i had no idea that this information was being withheld from me I had no idea what I was missing I had no idea anything was missing at all and I didn’t even realize it until I was already in too deep and set up for failure and fuck man. Ok now I know I’m not actually set up for failure - I can fix this I can dig myself out - but that’s what it feels like and that’s what it feels like right now, 12:55 AM, at least an hour after I started writing this, and yeah let’s circle back to the start so I can maybe wrap this up. These emotions all feel so crushing right now, so how do I not let them weigh me down? I know I’m being - no - I know they’re being unreasonable in some way, I know they’re not fully true, but the little seeds of truth that this overgrowth stems from are what really eat away at my brain. Fuck. Although, after writing it all down, I feel a bit lighter. A little less crushed. A little less pinned to my chair in terror. I feel a lot better, and I’m really happy that I (maybe) figured out (at least partially) why I spend so much time on my bed doing nothing. I do need therapy. I need to make time for that. anyways i really really gotta go piss bye take care of yourselves
I know it’s past 9pm and all (you know the image) but it’s so hard to not listen to these feelings when they are just chilling there!!! Like what the fuck am I supposed to do? My brain keeps forcing the same dish in my face, saying “you can’t play mario until you eat your broccoli” but instead of broccoli it’s the fear that everyone knows about the weird stuff I do or is wary or some shit like that and I have no idea what I’m doing in almost any conversation or social situation like I know it’s the autism but I still haven’t figured out how to reconcile the sheer discomfort I feel with the thought that I’m just choosing not to try to figure it out because I fucking freeze up and shit and I get too scared of making mistakes because I have no idea how lenient other people are on things and I have no idea how bad (to them) whatever stupid stuff I’ve done is, it’s like fuckin evangelion, you never truly know what’s going on inside someone else’s head, there is always some separation, fuck I need to watch evangelion again and fuck I need therapy. Fuck, I need therapy. I need to take the time to go get therapy because these thoughts are so fucking sharp and painful and I have no idea how brains are supposed to work, - is it normal that I struggle to remember a lot about my childhood? It could just be that I’m rarely in situations that click the right hyperlink in my brain to land on the right wikipedia page - fuck I need to get therapy because they’d know what brains normally do and how people normally act and yeah I know that nobody’s truly “normal” but I wanna know how I can fit in a little bit. Yeah I’m still gonna be myself but I want the overall artstyle to be cohesive, even if my character looks out of place. I don’t want to look like I was just shittily green-screened in from a different movie I want to be a little more normal I’m so tired I’m so tired of this ok I’m being a little overdramatic about this but I am so tired of it and I am tired of being overdramatic but it takes so much energy to dial it back especially because it’s late and I’m not rerouting this post, this is direct stream of consciousness fuck now it’s getting meta (I fucking hate that word sometimes) and self-conscious fuck why do I have to get so self-conscious I’m even getting fucking self-conscious about getting self-conscious right now I don’t even remember the events that made me this way I don’t know exactly why I’m so self-conscious I just have this vague concept, this abstract fucking anxiety cloud of “people will think you’re weird in a bad way” and “I don’t want to fuck anything up” and “you have no idea how to interact with people” I’m just remembering that time in early high school when my leading philosophy was “don’t be a burden” and my mom was like “oh that’s so sweet” and I was thinking “yeah this makes sense I’m just some fuckin guy I’m not that important” and while yeah that’s true I’m not like super important, that is such a degrading mindset to have, even if I didn’t realize it at the time. Change and conflict is scary and I’m still fucking terrified of it. I was about to say “I should change that [end of post]” like “haha yeah such a deep and cool ending” but like I realize that being afraid of things isn’t necessarily going to change but how I handle that fear can change but I don’t know how to do that and fuck I’m getting self-conscious again and ok I’m getting off topic I think a lot of my current intense yet nebulous insecurities come from 1) that period of “I don’t want to be a burden on anyone” and the conflict avoidance, emotion bottling, complacency, etc. that came with it; and 2) the constant felt need to hide what I was doing because I feared the consequences or didn’t want my parents to get upset at or about me, I would always be like “yeah mom I did my homework” when 10 seconds ago I was thinking to myself “yeah I can get that done soon” and I would have but then mom popped in and if I said “I haven’t done it yet” she’d get stressed out - even if I’d had it under control - and then that would fuck me up because -
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a fellow reip i see 👀 can i rq having ur first date and first kiss with rei? thank u sm!💜💜💜
𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚗𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚒 𝚌𝚕𝚊𝚒𝚖 𝚊𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜 | rei sakuma x reader





[an]: congrats, you just know my favorite shit to eat up and it’s your request/srs. YES I AM A REIP BCUZ I JUST LOVE HIM SM?!;!;₱:!;!/₱: HE’S LIKE SO FUCKING PRETTY AND I’M SO IN LOVE WITH HIM LIKE I CAN WRITE A WHOLE ESSAY DEDICATING MY HEART TO HIM. alright, i’m saying too much but sorry if this took a while, precious! tysm for requesting! <33
summary: if you prayed enough, you hoped that everything goes well on your first date with the leader of undead, the so-called ‘vampire’ of the group.
pairing: rei sakuma x g/n!reader!
genre: fluff!

12:37pm
never had you ever felt so nervous in your entire life when stepping upon the foot of the day you were born…
maybe it was just the way people from crowds would look over to you and take a glance from your figure just standing on the side. you looked nice, very formal in fact that you had caught some strangers’ attention. though, you weren’t here for them. you were waiting for a certain someone to arrive this day.
surprisingly, as much as you’d wanna slap yourself awake even if you knew clearly you weren’t dreaming—an idol asked you out on a date. you had no idea how you ended becoming a nobody in middle school to an idol from a famous unit asking you out with just the two of you. not to mention the unit’s leader and one of the main attractions of the group.
rei sakuma of undead has told you that he had been liking you for so long ever since you stepped in and become a producer for his unit, to make it fair everyone in the unit knew his obvious crush for you and had been desperately telling him to ask you out already for those fuzzy puppy love to be over. koga had to tell you some hints yet he wasn’t sure if you get it.
although, to also make it extra understandable…you too fell for rei. not only was that asshole good looking and talented in mostly everything, you were the first person he came out to from his true self. not rei sakuma from everyday idol practice—who bugs about being a vampire in a human world, but…rei. the one who’s showing his true colors. you don’t know why…but with that color showing you knew for sure you were in love with him. the angels sang when his feelings were mutual.
it was a lovely confession. just the two of you in the undead rehearsal room when he said those three words. ‘i love you.’ your expression was stuck between flustered or stunned. the light that illuminated from the window’s curtains shone on your e/c colored eyes and rei’s deep red pupils. you two were close to pressing your lips to one another, if weren’t for the twins barging inside of the room looking all excited. the atmosphere was cut, however rei whispered if you’d go on a date with him tomorrow since…it was his day off from daily idol practice and duties.
so, here you are…all tidied up and looks fixed. you didn’t really give much care to your looks before…that was until you worked with rei and his unit. he made you feel like you were someone special, and you took that thought to heart a bit. as adults, children, and even elderly walked pass by the sidewalk, all you did was check your phone and the time—you made sure you looked alright at the reflection of the screen, and continued to wait. the area was almost crowded with citizens, you were deciding to whether keep waiting there or just text rei that you’d wait somewhere else since the place was close to being packed. you looked very anxious in the flood of people, looking at your phone every second when someone walks by.
the stares somehow made you uncomfortable every time they head to your direction. it always did. but, you had to get used to them as you are undead’s producer and interviews are a high chance of happening to you. last check on the time, it was now 12:58pm. you arrived here at around 12:30–and your chest was beating fast. what if rei wasn’t really going to come? what if he was playing some kind of joke on you? a dare from the other members? or probably even the twins? you weren’t sure of what to think anymore. you hated how you’re easily pla—
“behind you.”
the voice that came from your back got you jumping from surprise. a startled expression on engulfs over your face as your hand was calmly placed on your beating heart. you can hear him chuckle, “sorry if i came a little late. did you wait long?” was the first thing he asked upon now fully looking at you. rei, this bastard coming out of nowhere like always. although he did gave you a fright, you weren’t gonna lie that he looked too good looking for somebody wearing casual clothing, including on a first date. a black coat, covering his purple, rock labeled t-shirt from the inside, paired with jet black pants and some expensive looking shoes. he was wearing a necklace you had never seen before. a cross, this dork. you weren’t sure how much he can keep the old vampire act if he keeps acting the opposite. on his wrists was a watch, and the handmade bracelet you gave him last week after a concert. a small gift for him, is what you like to call it.
the male gave you a toothy grin as your eyes locked onto his figure, observing his attire and looks. and with that grin plastered on you knew exactly what was going on over his head. “stare as much as you’d like, little darling.”
“huh..? i-i wasn’t staring…! you scared me…!” is what you replied, “but i didn’t wait long so i’m fine…”
was the heat from your cheeks visible? you prayed to god they weren’t…or else it’ll add up to rei’s endless teasing. and you did not wanna look like a burning mess throughout your first date. as a soft laugh escapes from the male, he meets your eyes and at that mere second…you just couldn’t help but look away. jesus, this was embarrassing. do you look alright? sure, not like you checked yourself on the phone camera like 10 times already. made sure to brush every bed hair down? yeah, you were doing just great.
nonetheless with all the panic you had within yourself earlier you probably looked like an idiot.
“you look gorgeous.” was what you heard in front. you couldn’t help but cup both of your cheeks on your hands to calm the heat forming over your face. it was just a simple compliment…though why did it impacted you so much like it was a mark? another chuckle can be heard to your ears. not long after, rei pushes both of his hands down into his pockets before starting, “well then, now that we’re here, let’s go now…” he takes his right hand out from the pocket and extended it towards your view. “shall we…?”
it took you a few seconds to analyze what was going on, and steadily…you took your hand on his. there was an instant electricity that sparked the moment you held his hand. it was…soft. you definitely did not expect that. as he tightened the grip of your hand and pulled you closer to him, you gasped a bit, and rei’s smile widen. “the aquarium is close if we take the train. let’s not waste time now.” then off he pulled you gently towards the station.
the entire time on your way to the train station with rei, your heart was skipping beats and your eyes’ view were glued down to the floor. your right hand tightened your grip to the rope of your bag when you kept going back to the thought of the two of you holding hands throughout the walk…you swore to the heavens above if someone you knew from your school saw you two like this you would jump off a bridge. but his hands…were so soft. you hoped your palms weren’t sweating…that would be embarrassing for sure.
a ring. you noted that he was wearing a ring on his hand. ruby red…must be given by a family member. definitely not ritsu…or maybe he did? how were you supposed to know? you were far to notice how long you were staring at his hand. and all of a sudden, the grip of rei’s palm around yours tighten, and you gasped once again. “is something the matter?” yes there is.
looking up at him, you shook your head, “no, i-i’m fine…” a second silence, then he smiles. “do you not like it when i hold you hand…?” the male questions next, you shrieked. “huh?? n-no it’s alright..! i don’t mind i swear..!” idiot, idiot, idiot, your heart now was beating double times. you hoped it wasn’t obvious. rei chuckles, “it’s fine if you are, i swear. just tell me, no need to lie. i need to make sure you’re comfortable after all.” fuckkk…you were so in love with this man. “oh? your face is red.”
“shut up…” it was more visible now when you looked away. and rei seemed to have like this reaction of yours that you created. great job. it wasn’t like this was your first time holding the undead leader’s hand. in fact, you remembered holding it whenever you would help him stand up from his coffin or whenever he’d lay down somewhere. and because of it—out of nowhere, rei’s hand shifted, with his fingers now intertwining with yours…you felt like your heart and pulse stopped at that moment. holy shit…this guy…
“now you’re even more red. you comfortable?” you wanted to scream very. looking at him, you nodded your head with no response coming from your lips, and he grins. dear goodness he was so charming. who knew you were so lucky?
when the both of you arrived at the train station, you payed for your tickets and then waited for the train to arrive so you could come early to the new aquarium rei told you about for your date plan. and during the train ride, who knew you and rei had so much in common…since it seemed like you both never ran out of topics to talk about inside of the train. there were less people than usual…it was saturday after all and not much students were riding (except not less the office workers inside) so, talking to one another where only you two can hear was amazing.
as the train arrived to your destination, you and rei hopped out of the station and walked to the aquarium. based to the location on the map, the aquarium was only a few blocks away from the train station, so it would be easier to walk there instead of looking for a ride towards the place. you and rei had a lovely chat on your way there, so lovely in fact that you didn’t even notice you both were still holding hands, fingers intertwined.
it didn’t take long when the two of you reached the place—and as predicted not too much ago, the aquarium was being swarmed by loads of people. it was expected since it was said to be build by one of the greatest architects around the town. after all, new forms of ideas by geniuses were much obliged by the folks. you had no idea how rei was able to find this place, yet you know him…a mysterious and cunning individual. no wonder why you fell for this man. “ooh, it’s bigger than i imagined…” you hear him speak, eyes focused on the aquarium complex. you nodded your head in agreement. “the fact that it was newly build in this area but the flood of crowds read like they knew this place for long ago…it really is impressive.”
“kuku…i’m quite flattered that we’re one of the hundreds of crowds arrived to see this place after it’s construction. i should thank the kids for showing me a perfect spot for this date,” the ravenette says before looking at you. you flinched when his face comes close to yours, “let’s head inside, i bet there’s more impressive structure arranged. also, there’s a lot of sea animals we’ll get to view,” you didn’t get to mutter out your words when rei began to drag you inside.
the shoulders of each person you bumped into was countless—you can see that rei was pretty calm about the whole time he dragged you inside the complex. you two payed for tickets to enter the aquarium, and as you stepped your foot onto the place, your eyes shimmered with the amount of beautiful wavy blue aquatic animals you saw from each side to side. children laughed while adults chased after their child. you sighed satisfyingly when you looked around, twirling while a huge smiled covered your face, and if only you noticed…rei fell even more for you.
“wow…” you only managed to murmur out. the reflection in your eyes perfectly catches the view of the fishes swimming in the tanks, your fingertips pressing onto the glass slowly. you were mesmerized, and rei loved this sight of yours. he’d make sure he’ll record it with his heart. “this place is prettier than the other aquariums i visited as a kid…woah..! rei, look…! that fish is looking at us funny..!” rei went closer to your side to look, and he chuckles. “heh, i forgot what type of fish that is…but it does look humorous.”
you both traveled floor to floor—and even scheduled for the penguin show. during that, you almost got separated away from your date. the room was filled, and the sight of rei was seemed to be absent from your perspective. you panicked a little, trying to look on every corner of rei was there somewhere. slapping your forehead you can’t help but mutter a few curse words under your breath where kids nearby can’t hear you. however, when a fish that was struck with golden caught your attention, you couldn’t help but follow to where it was swimming towards. it’s fin was beautiful, almost looked liked it was sparkling. you bet subaru would love this fish.
your eyes followed it until you can see the fish swimming towards another one of their kind, and before you knew it, they kissed. it was lovely, and you can’t help but smile. usually, you’d like to mark these kinds of situations as a ‘coincidence,’ yet when your eyes looked up and met with deep red color, your heart raced. rei, was surprisingly at the other side of the fish tank, and at that moment you felt like you were in a movie. as he stared back right at you, he smiles softly, waving over to your direction.
his eyes reads; ‘you found me.’
you gaze back with a gentle smile, ‘i found you.’
***
you and rei spent the whole day at the aquarium. you two ate lunch, shop at different stalls along with buying stuffed animals, and even finally got to watch the penguin show together. you took ton of pictures—and rei even won some small penguin plushies for you. 3 of them.
it was 6:34pm when you both exited out of the place, and mostly everyone was heading home as well. you were tired, rei was tired, everyone who hopped in was tired. but you won’t doubt that it was fun.
you scrolled to your images while walking towards the train station. your storage was probably crying by now with the amount of photos you took from the complex. rei was carrying the items you two got on your journey—he insisted that he’ll be carrying them so you won’t be more worn out. besides, it was just a bunch of soft stuffed plushies, not like they were really heavy.
at the train station, you both got your tickets and got in. there were ton of empty seats, so you both sat at the nearby ones to sit down and finally rest your legs. rei was probably wobbling like the ‘old man’ he proclaimed to be. not like you were believing that. you were worn out, and because of it, rei allowed you to nap on his shoulders. the feeling was amazing on your way home—not to mention you were holding his hand as you rested and snoozed. it made you feel, safe…and loved.
with the twinkled silhouette that merged from the windows of the train, rei looked down at your face and smiles, stroking your hair behind your ear as he watches you nap on his shoulder. lovely, he always thinks you were lovely. his lovely producer. no one else’s.
the train finally came to a stop, rei made sure to slowly wake you up before heading out. he didn’t want his lover to wince suddenly while they were enjoying their rest. when the two of you headed outside, it was night. 7:02pm.
you slowly rubbed your eyes as you yawned behind your palm during the walk down the streets. rei laughs gently at this, “you were enjoying that rest, were you? apologies if i have awoken you up.”
“n-no, it’s alright. it’s just a nap anyways, i’ll have a good rest when i come back home. maybe…i’ll make some hot chocolate before bed? or probably warm milk…hmm…” you placed a finger curiously on your chin as you think, and the male beside you couldn’t help but crack a smile of how adorable you looked. the moon shone down brightly at the both of you, mixed with the bright light from the streetlights down the road. the sky was filled with millions of stars, clouds illuminating from behind as they faded. you can suddenly hear rei stop from the back next to a lamppost. you stopped as well.
“sakuma-san? what’s wrong?” you questioned. he didn’t answer, instead—rei looked up at the starry night and sighed. the stars pointed direction like a map, you’ve heard astrology being a great map to those who are lost, from books you’ve read before—and which books that rei lends over to you. “you see that? i can see connected constellations of stars stitched together. look over there,” he spoke, pointing up at the sky. you cocked a brow, yet you followed. brilliant.
the sky was brilliant, your eyes sparkled, beautifully. from each star that represents each shape and figure, you’ve tried your best to remember theirs names. should you bring your phone out? but it’s low battery and you weren’t even sure if it’ll make it.
though…you were so distracted that… you finally snapped out when you felt a pair of lips land on yours.
the world stopped from spinning. your eyes grew wide from surprise, and your heart began to beat faster than before. there was this…moment of silence that swam in the atmospheric between the sweetness of the kiss. leaves flying by and small pebbles rolling down, breaths heaving quietly. an electric feeling rusted inside of your body, heat flowing up towards your cheeks as you felt the whole world began to crash down your shoulders.
your eyes no longer reflected towards the starry night rei pointed for you, it was now reflected with the eyes that are evident of somebody in love. each cloud shape shifted, and all you could focus on was his lips on yours. his eyes were closed shut, right hand holding onto the lamppost while you stood in front.
the kiss lasted for a second, yet the feeling felt like an hour. when the two of you separated, all you could do was stare at him with glowing cheeks, mouth wide agape. rei grins, chuckling afterwards before covering his mouth with his hand. “ah…sorry, i just couldn’t help if. are…are you…?” his sentence cut off when he saw you cover your face with both of your hands, looking away. now it was his turn to bloom into a blush of red. “i-i’m sorry that was just…surprising…i..” you stammered with your words with a struggle.
stupid heart stop beating so fast !
rei takes a hold of your hand, removing them from your face, tenderly. the night was for you two alone. “are you ok? did i somehow make you…you know?”
“ah..! n-no you didn’t…! it’s ok..!”
another awkward line of tranquil silence.
“my apologies for acting so sudden.”
“n-no…! like i said it’s a-ok! you don’t have to say sorry just…send a signal…? next time? my heart won’t stop beating…” you had to place your hand over your chest to feel your heart jumping. it was natural, both of your faves were red after all—you weren’t alone this time. rei laughs so softly, once again taking a hold of your hand and landing a kiss.
“i wonder how many times i’ve made you blush today.”
“i-i’ll slap you..”
he chuckles, that smile reads teasing. “come on, i’ll fetch you home.”
you didn’t sleep much that night. your head was filled with your kiss with rei. and all you could do was hug your pillow and scream quietly.

a/n: hahahaha i suck at writing shit like this kill me but i love rei
requests: opened!
#lucy’s works 📚✨#lucy works 🍕💗#ensemble stars#enstars#enstars x reader#ensemble stars x reader#rei sakuma#rei sakuma x reader#fluff <3#💌. lucyanswers#i hate this probably#lucy shut up 🧀✨
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natashxromanovf's 1k followers writing challenge

hi my angels! i wanted to thank you for 1000 followers. that's huge. there's so many of you here that i could fill a small town! i am infinitely grateful for every single one of you. i have met great friends on here, the nicest people, so thank you. i love you all, you deserve all the kisses in the world xx

⍟ rules:
- please choose max. 4 prompts
- fandoms: HP; MCU; Outer Banks; Stranger Things; The Vampire Diaries; The Originals; Teen Wolf; Descendants; criminal minds; 911; 911: lone star; shadow and bone; shameless; shadowhunters
- there's no deadline, however the final date for entry is october 28th :)
- you can mix prompts (ex. choose one from angst, one from fluff etc.)
- no nsfw fics please!
- you have to tell me the prompts + character for which you want to do this via asks
- you must tag me @/natashxromanovf and use the tag #tajas1kfollowerswritingchallenge so we can make sure i see it!
- tag the warnings approprietly, and most importantly, have fun while doing it. don't force it if you don't feel like writing, i don't care if you post the fic in two years or if you don't post at all. my intention is for people to have fun <33

۞ fluff
1. “I didn’t get soaked wet through walking to your apartment for you to say no to pizza. I have beer too. I know you’re sad, so let me in.”
2. “I refuse to stop irritating you until you give me attention.”
3. “You’re like... everything good that has ever happened rolled into one adorable package.”
4. “You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this.”
5. “Well, I am pretty irresistible.”
6. “Oh, you’ve started started stealing my socks now?”
7. “Do you think the moon is jealous of how pretty you are?”
8. “Everything alright?” “I just missed you.”
9. “You getting so flustered is one of the cutest things I’ve ever seen.”
10. “I would like my good morning kiss now.”
11. “I love to hear your voice, even if you’re so far away.”
12. “There is no better way to start the day than seeing your face.”
13. “How come you always end up under my blanket?”
14. “Believe me, I will never be tired of you.”
15. "So, who..." "Not going to talk about that."

۞ angst
1. "I told you not to fall in love with me.”
2. “I will leave now, or I’m going to say things I will regret later.”
3. “This is not how family is supposed to feel like.”
4. "I didn't want it to come out like that. That's why I wanted to leave." "Without ever telling me?"
5. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” “It’s ok. We’ll figure it out - together.”
6. "I love you, okay?! And I can't stay in your life when I'm just ruining it." "You can't just say that and don't wait for me to answer."
7. “You’re going to be okay. Just keep breathing. Please.”
8. “You’re supossed to be mad at me! Why aren’t you yelling at me?”
9. “If you don’t hug me right now I think I might fall apart.”
10. “I don’t hold people close. It makes it easier for them to hurt you.”
11. “I had a nightmare. Can I stay with you?”
12. “Nobody has seen you in days.”
13. “Are you hurt?” “No.” “Then why are there bruises all over your face?”
14. “We found you crying. What happened?”
15. "How could you do this to me?" "You're so naive, it's almost adorable."

۞ misc + situation prompts
1. Person A gets a phone call from Person B around midnight, in which Person B is clearly panicked.
2. “What do you mean they’re my new partner? They tried to kill me last week!” “Sounds like your problem.”
3. “Did you just slap my ass?” “Actually, I firmly grasped it.” “Did you just quote Spongebob?”
4. Person A hasn’t been sleeping due to work, and they of course get sick. Despite person B’s wishes, person A continues to sneak out of bed and stay up late to get more work done, and person B is not happy.
5. “Didn’t you two used to hate each other?” “Yeah, but now we hold hands and shit!”
6. “Walk it off!” “I literally can’t walk.”
7. “Hold on... you’re bilingual?” “Yes?”
8. “I’m too sober for this.” “You don’t even drink.” “Maybe I should start.”
9. “Can I pet your dog?” “Do I know you?”
10. "You owe me." "I owe you $20 not a day of pretending to be your boy/girl-friend to get your parents off you're back."
11. Seeing videos of yourself and not recognizing the person you see, is a horrible feeling.
12. “How much money would you give me to flip this table, right here, right now, in the middle of class?”
13. “You said to be honest stop hitting me!!”
14. “Ew, that is so sappy, I might vomit.”
15. Seeing their lover getting hurt ignited a fire full of rage inside of them that nothing could’ve held them back.

uff, that was a long post. anyway, thank you again for all the support, i couldn't have made it without you. all prompts belong to @creativepromptsforwriting so make sure to check her blog out!
and now, for the end, i'm tagging some people who might be interested in this and/or would be so kind to boost :) i love you all, remember that <33
@pregnant-piggy @mirclealignr @velvetcloxds @cxoffeeaddict @arkofblake @jackys-stuff-blog @leossmoonn @sarahisslytherin @milkiane @cupids-crystals @sheraayasher @f4irydaydreams @fairydxll @griffxnnage @henqtic @kimoralov3 @serpentargo @melin-oe @of-apollo @annab-nana @sabstfu @rorybutnotgilmore @shadesofvelma @awritingtree @imabee-oralizard @mendesxruel @messers-moony @dunbarsjersey @spring-picnics @robinbuckleyluvr @just-a-smol-spoon @peggycartervariantbetty
#tajas1kfollowerswritingchallenge#taja talks#thank you!!!#harry potter#marvel#outer banks#stranger things#the vampire diaries#the originals#teen wolf#descendants#criminal minds#911#911: lone star#shadow and bone#shameless#shadowhunters#mcu
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Hello Can we talk about your talent girl you're shinning ❤💅💅
But seriously you're work is awesome
Tell me plz if I can request this:
Takemitchi coming back to the past not understanding what is missing for the future
He is in one of toman meeting waiting for the "talk" but he hear some noise behind the tree 🌳and when he go to see he find micky and his gf(s/o) kissing and being lovey dovey and then he understands that she is the reason of mickeys dark implusion (dk if i wrot it good)
Like her dying in his arms so like takemitchi want to save both of them (I'm sucker for this type of angst 🤧)
Sorry if this is too much 😅you don't have to do it just wanted to cry
Love 💘😻💜💛💚🧡💘😻💜💛💚🧡
Oh my god! I'm so glad you are enjoying my writing and thank you so much! You have just made my whole week with that! ❤️😭❤️
Of course! I am a sucker for angst (if you couldn't tell from my posts) and this is just amazing!!
Thank you so much for requesting and I hope you enjoy this @kimrena-stuff
--
Mikey X f!reader (fluff with angst)
TW: mentions of death, sadness, blood, violence, canon divergence, alternate timeline
--
The future still wasn't perfect in Takemichi's eyes. Sure, most of the people he tried saving survived but there still was no happy ending for any of them. And once again, Hinata had been killed.
It was confusing him. Surely he had made sure that everything was fixed in the past? What was he missing that could have caused another bad future. The blond had even asked Chifuyu about any events that could be coming up that would cause Mikey to turn out the same as he had every other future. Was it Kisaki? But Kisaki had been fired from Toman.
Chifuyu could not offer much information, after all, he did not know the future and Mikey hadn't declared a war on any other gangs since last time Takemichi had gone back. So there was no luck in that department. Maybe they were both overlooking something small that would be massive in the future?
Takemichi was sort of thankful that he had been called up about the Toman meeting that was happening that night. He could find his answer there, he was sure. After all, each meeting he had gone to so far had provided him with an idea of what was going to happen.
He had arrived at the shrine earlier than most other members. The only ones he really knew that had arrived were Draken, Mitsuya and Chifuyu considering that was who he hitched a ride with. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary except Mikey wasn't with Draken as he usually would be.
Curiosity had gotten the better of the young Toman, he had went to ask Draken where the captain was. Draken simply pointed over to a gathering of trees, explaining that Mikey could usually be found there before meetings start. That seemed to only make the boy's curiosity worse, wondering what Mikey could be doing in the cover of the trees.
He couldn't be meeting up with Kisaki still, could he? Is that why the future was not getting any better? Panic filled Takemichi as he approached the trees. If he was talking with Kisaki then that could be his only chance to stop it and create the perfect future he wanted!
It was as he was getting closer that he heard what he thought was two voices talking quietly. Not quiet enough where it could be considered whispering but enough where Takemichi couldn't make out the words being exchanged. He could tell one of them was definitely Mikey but the other could have been anyone. Had Mikey decided to ally himself with someone even more dangerous than Kisaki was proving to be? After all, nobody in Toman had been able to see Mikey in the future so it could be possible.
Trying his best to hide himself from Mikey, Takemichi peeked his head around to find a sight that made his cheeks flush a dark red. Mikey had both hands against a tree trunk with an absolute hottie between them. At first, it seemed a little alarming for the younger blond until he had noticed the soft smile and blush that dusted your features.
It was only when Mikey leaned down to press a kiss to your lips that Takemichi had felt he was overstaying his welcome. Especially since he wasn't really welcome in the first place. He was simply a creepy peeper at that moment. Why did he keep ending up in these types of moments that made him look like a creep?! First it was with Emma and now he was essentially watching his captain make out with his girlfriend.
"I love you, Mikey." Your voice was breathless from that kiss, your eyes sparkling as they stared into your lover's dark ones. It was obvious to anyone that you were both so in love with each other. Hell, you were sneaking off together at any moment you could find just to be all lovey dovey with each other.
"I love you more, Y/N."
Takemichi had caught that small snippet of your conversation as he was trying to silently walk away. He really didn't want to be caught by the Invincible Mikey staring at the loving exchange after all. But it did get him thinking. Had you ever been mentioned in the future? Surely if you were this in love, you would remain by Mikey's side forever?
The Toman meeting started as it usually did. You would be sat on the stairs while your boyfriend would address the issues related to the gang. Everyone knew who you were, you would always be at the meetings after all unless you had to attend to other business. That would explain why Takemichi hadn't seen you. You must have been attending to other things every meeting that the blond went to. All throughout the meeting, Takemichi could only try and recall if you're present in some way in the future. Surely you would still be hanging around with the same people 12 years later.
He would have to contact Naoto in the future as soon as he could. After all, if there was something big that was going to happen then he would want to find out as soon as he could. And so, as soon as the meeting was finished, he made his way to the Tachibana household to find young Naoto.
"So, how did it go? Were you able to change anything?" That was the first thing Naoto asked once Takemichi had woken up. It was the same routine each time. Naoto would ask if he had changed anything, knowing that it wasn't enough since Hinata was still dead. But maybe if something had changed, they were a little bit closer to finding out what was causing this chain of reactions.
Takemichi shook his head and then dived headfirst into his question. He had asked if you were ever mentioned in one way or another. Maybe if you were still alive, something must have happened between you and Mikey which he could prevent from occurring. Just thinking back on how in love you both were with each other, he was beginning to doubt that it was a simple break up.
It had taken the two males a full hour until your name had popped up in their searches. It really didn't help that Takemichi only knew your first name and that you would hang out with Toman. The news article had filled the computer screen, a photo of you smiling in the top corner of the page. It gave off a vibe that didn't match the contents of the article.
You had been stabbed 15 times in the chest and stomach during a gang brawl between Toman and a gang Takemichi hadn't heard of yet. You were rushed to the hospital but had died before the doctors could reach you. It stated that it was a boy named Manjiro Sano that had brought you in.
It all started to make sense now. You had been caught up in the brawl and had sustained injuries that had ended your life. So Mikey had lost himself when you had died in his arms as he tried his best to save you.
Takemichi checked the date on which you had died. 2 days from today. Why wasn't this brawl mentioned at the Toman meeting?! Did Mikey keep it a secret or was it a spontaneous confrontation? Takemichi could only guess it was the second option. Especially since the brawl would take place at Toman's meeting spot at the shrine.
"I need to save Y/N from dying. That is what we were missing! If she survives, Mikey won't lose another piece of himself." And with that, the handshake that activated the time leaping had taken place.
Takemichi had explained his plan to Chifuyu. Explained how there would be a brawl the next day at the shrine and how that is possibly the trigger for the bad futures. After all, Mikey might stay sane with you by his side. Chifuyu couldn't believe what he was hearing. A gang would have the balls to enter the meeting place of Toman just to start a fight? They must either hold a huge grudge against them or were just plain insane. No gang was to ever enter another gang's meeting spot as it was seen as sacred.
The blond had vowed that he would do anything he could to protect you from harm and ultimately save Mikey from his dark future. Even if he had to glue himself to your side, he would make sure nothing happened to you. He would make up for the time he had failed to save Baji.
You and Mikey continued with your routine. Enter the tree clearing and spend some quality time together. You both exchanged kisses, splitting the dorayaki you would keep on you for your boyfriend, and joking around. Everything a couple in love should do.
The day of the brawl had arrived and so had the rival gang. It was in the middle of Mikey addressing his gang that the opponent's had arrived. The shock was quickly erased as the fighting began. Mikey had made sure you stayed close behind him so he could keep you safe, even though you could fight. Maybe not as well as most of the Toman members but you were capable of keeping yourself safe.
Takemichi scanned the entire shrine area in search of you. Relief had briefly enveloped the middle schooler. After all, if Mikey was with you, nobody could touch you. Or that's what everyone had thought. You had been separated from Mikey as soon as the gang members discovered you were cared for deeply by him. They had thought that if they got you, they could win the fight.
It was if the world was entering slow motion. Takemichi tried to push his way to where you were being dragged, the determination to save everyone being his main driving force. Mikey had yet to notice you were no longer behind him, too focused on taking out the leader and winning the brawl so he could take you home where you would be safe. However, that plan was quickly becoming less likely.
"Shit! Move out of my way!" Takemichi had panic pumping throughout his veins. If he couldn't get to you in time, there was no second chance. It was times like this that made him realise just how human he was. He was one boy, not a God. He could only do so much. But he was sure as hell gonna try and save you.
"Y/N!" Takemichi's voice carried across the entirety of the battlefield. So much so that everyone had frozen, especially Mikey. He turned his gaze to behind him where he thought you were only to find you were missing. Frantic, his dark eyes scanned the area until they rested on you being held against your will. The boy who held you had his arm across your neck, squeezing so you couldn't call out to your boyfriend. However, it was the knife that he pointed to your chest that had Mikey scared.
Takemichi was the only person who didn't freeze, pushing his way past the bodies that stood like statues. He could make it! He could save everyone with this one action! He was convinced that this was why Mikey had given into his dark impulses and why no-one could get their happily ever afters.
He was too late. The knife had pierced through your chest, narrowly missing any vital organs. This had seemed to spur the younger blond to increase his speed, trying to keep in mind that you could survive if he kept the stabs to a minimum. After all, the news article had explained how you had been stabbed 15 times. One was fixable. One he could deal with.
Mikey couldn't seem to move. His love had been stabbed. For no other reason than they were there and sticking by him. This wasn't fair. You had nothing to do with what the problem was and you shouldn't be paying the price for it either.
It felt like an eternity for Takemichi to reach where you were. His legs were screaming at him to stop and his heart was beating a million miles a minute. In the time it took him to get to you, you had sustained another two stabs in your stomach and chest. The person doing it was nothing short of a monster. He didn't care that you were innocent or that you were a girl. He just continued his mission.
The sound of skin to skin contact echoed, a sickening crack following along. Takemichi had landed the hardest punch he could muster against the side profile of the monster. The crack was the jaw breaking underneath the force. You were released as the perpetrator stumbled backwards, falling as he lost consciousness. Takemichi had made it but he wasn't confident that it was in time. He couldn't help but watch as you smiled and fell sideways. Fueled simply by the adrenaline, he had carefully picked you up in his arms before starting his journey to the hospital.
Draken had been the one to snap Mikey out of his daze, telling him to get his bike. There was no way that Takemichi would get there in time if he was simply thinking of running. And so that's what Mikey did. He fired up his precious bike, ordering the young blond to climb onto the back before speeding his way to the closest medical facility.
Due to all of this, you had survived. Takemichi had succeeded in saving you and thus saving Mikey. There was a possibility that the future would be good this time.
Once he had heard you were alive and doing well, Mikey had finally let himself react. Tears fell one after the other down his cheeks and relief had lifted his heart. He wouldn't lose you. You were alive because of Takemitchy. That is something Mikey couldn't thank the younger blond enough for. He had saved your life when Mikey could do nothing but watch.
Everyone expressed their gratitude for Takemichi. After all, they couldn't imagine what Mikey would turn out like if he had lost you during that fight. Takemichi had an idea but wasn't about to spill what the future he knew was like. Speaking of which, he did wonder how this had affected his future. Would everyone finally have their happy endings? He sure did hope so.
As soon as Naoto had shook his hand, Takemichi had found himself sitting at a table with a can of beer in his hand. Confused on what was going on, he glanced around at his surroundings. He was currently in a home that looked nothing like his apartment. Photos of a couple he vaguely recognised littered the walls, there was the scent of takeout wafting in the air, and the noise was loud yet joyful.
A few days later, Takemichi decided to head back to where he belonged. 12 years in the future. You had been discharged from the hospital and probably on a date with Mikey as he approached the Tachibana residence. Thinking about it, Mikey had seemed to brighten up more ever since you had been allowed out of the hospital. Takemichi laughed as he recalled Mikey buried under a large bouquet of your favourite flowers and a giant plushie of your favourite animal on that day. You had simply laughed before peppering the Toman leader's face in kisses. You had also planted a peck on the younger boy's cheek as a sign of how grateful you were to him. After all, if Takemichi hadn't done any of that, you wouldn't be able to spend anymore time with Mikey. You owed him your life.
That's when Takemichi realised he had done it. Hinata was chatting happily with Yuzuha and Hakkai about their experiences in Europe; Mitsuya, Smiley and Angry were laughing about some inside joke no-one knew about; Pah-chin and Peh-yan were discussing business relating to the real estate agency; Kazutora and Inui were drinking in the corner, simply observing the festivities; and Draken was chatting away happily to Mikey, his arm around Emma's waist as she tried to soothe their baby. Takemichi had saved them all. They were all OK. Most of all, Hinata was alive.
"Anyone needing any refills?" your voice trailed in from where you stood in the doorway connecting the living room and kitchen. You looked almost the same except for a few features. Takemichi knew at that moment that this was the perfect future for everyone, especially when Hinata had come over and kissed his cheek. The discussion around the room had suddenly become one as everyone spoke about the upcoming weddings between you and Mikey as well as the one between Takemichi and Hinata. For the first time in a long time, Takemichi could let go of the weight he had carried around and enjoy his life with his friends and his fiancé.
#tokyo revengers#tokyo revengers x reader#mikey sano#mikey x reader#angst with a happy ending#anime drabble#tokyo revengers scenarios#manjiro sano#requested#takemitchy#takemichi hanagaki
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Smoker’s Heart
Chapter 1- Stage 1A
Chapter Warning: Consensual non-con, choking, smoking, writing on the body, name-calling, humiliation, face slapping, gender roles, masturbation, anal sex, sexting
Navigation: Chapter 1, Chapter 2
Fandom: Squid Game
Pairing: Cho Sang-Woo x Reader
Rating: Explicit (18+ but has a lot of fluff)
Word count: 7.3k (sorry?)
Summary: Cho Sang-Woo, chronic smoker, knows the smoker's lung too well. It's dark, mottled and hyperinflated. A smoker’s lungs function better 2 weeks to 3 months after his last cigarette. The lungs can clean itself 1 to 12 months later. Ten years later, the risk of lung cancer is halved. But, when does the smoker’s heart get better?
A/N: It’s my first fic of the year and oh boy what a way to start a year. I hope you have a good year. I hope you'll be safe and healthy. Unlike Sang-Woo. He’s umm not in the best shape
My phone screen illuminated once again as I tapped on it, smiling as I saw my lock screen— the picture we’d taken on our balcony on our first day living together. I waited as the minutes passed slower than they usually did, taunting and torturing me before finally turning to 07:00 am. It was 09:00 pm back home and I knew she’d be back from work. I dialed her number and put it on loud speaker. It only took one full ring before I heard her sweet voice from the other side of the planet. It warmed my heart that she was just as eager to talk to me.
“Good morning,” she sang as soon as she picked up.
“Good evening, Jagiya… How was work?” I asked, my smile making me sound happier than I was to be so far away from her.
“It was great, actually. It was a rare peaceful day. Nobody died.”
“Good. Good girl.”
“I know. I’m the best. What did you have for dinner last night,” she asked, making me sigh. I hated being asked about food. It was a most unproductive question. Very pointless. Yes, I ate. It’s something I do everyday to stay alive. It was like being asked if I breathed today. And there was the complaining, oh god the complaining. No matter what I ate, she didn’t think it was nutritious enough. She was of the opinion that I didn’t take adequate care of her husband.
“I ate. That’s all you need to know.”
“That’s so rude. I’m just a wife missing her husband, wishing to know if he’s taking care of himself when I’m not there to take care of him.”
“I am taking care of myself. I’ll come home to you in one piece. Happy?”
“Not yet,” she said. I could picture her cute little pout as she said it. “Tell me what you ate.”
“Not pussy, unfortunately,” I said, directing her away from the topic of food.
“Unfortunately?” She gasped dramatically. “So you want to be eating pussy when you’re on the other side of the world where your wife isn’t.”
“You know what I meant. You know I only want you.”
“Good boy,” she breathed into the phone, making me gulp.
I quite liked it when she praised me. It made me feel all tingly. I did my fair share of the chores? Good boy. I remembered our friend’s birthday? Good boy. It was stupid to expect appreciation for the basic tasks I did at home, but it was much appreciated because I barely got any at work.
“Did you have dinner?” I asked, breaking my own rule regarding food-related questions. I just wanted to know if she ate. She came home much later than I did sometimes, so I cooked and made sure she ate before bed. Without me there, I was worried about whether she was feeding herself. She also tended to not cook when I wasn’t home, claiming that it was boring to cook just for herself.
“No. I’m on a hunger strike,” she mocked, clearly annoyed at my hypocrisy.
I decided to entertain her sarcastic response. “Oh? Why?”
“Because I miss my husband. AndI have decided I will not even touch a morsel of food until he comes back.”
“It's going to take your husband two short weeks to return to you. You must eat.”
“Everything tastes like ash without you here. I won't eat it. You must return at once.”
“Are you buying food from a restaurant? Because your food always tastes good, not like ash.”
“Nothing tastes good without you,” she whined. “Food alone can't nourish me.”
“Oh, Jagiya…” I cooed, opening the gallery on my phone. “We can't have that. Next time, I'll pack you up for my trip along with my clothes,” I teased. The conversation was quite unproductive and silly. I didn’t ever entertain pointless conversations. Until her. With her, I could talk about nothing for minutes.
“Or you could just come back home sooner. We would save the fees on the extra luggage.”
“Oh, I don't mind spending extra on luggage if I can have you here with me. I'll tie you up nicely, make you compact for the suitcase. You look great in ropes so that shouldn't be a problem,” I said, opening the drawer on my desk where I had pictures of her in compromising positions, bound tight by my skilled hands. “And umm I could still get close to the weight limit by not packing you any clothes.”
“It’s like 6 in the morning for you, you pervert!” She exclaimed, making me chuckle. “How are you so horny early in the morning? And so insensitive to my state of starvation. And now you want me to be starving and shivering in the winter cold? What kind of husband are you?”
“Hmm, you are very attractive when you’re shivering under my body…” I punctuated my words with a groan, recalling how I would trap her under my weight as she came down from orgasms I gave her.
“Wow,” she gasped. “That’s it, I’m getting a divorce.”
“Don’t even joke about that. You’re mine” I said, sternly. “I was just proposing a solution, trying to solve my dear wife’s problems. Come with me wherever I go, stay naked throughout, let me feed you nutritious food. And if that doesn't satisfy your appetite, there are other things I can occupy your mouth with. I’ll spare you a blanket if you can be a good girl. I’ll tie you up nicely to my bed, use you whenever I want…”
I flipped through the pictures of her, landing on the picture of her on her knees, her mouth full of my cock and her eyes full of devotion. The next picture was taken shortly after, her pure innocent face covered in my come. Feeling myself getting excited, I threw the pictures back in my drawer.
“That might actually kill me since you’re never home. You’ll forget again that you have a wife pining for you at home and I’ll starve to death. And you’ll come home late and just pass out after eating dinner and smoking and then also working on the weekends. So I’ll die of starvation and not even have a good fuck to show for it.”
I opened my mouth to defend myself, but she interrupted me. “Did you say you’ll spare me a blanket? Just a blanket!? You’re working on Wall Street and all you can give your food-starved, touch-starved wife is a blanket? So cheap.”
“I wouldn’t be passing out at night after work if you gave me something nice to be excited about. Change from your scrubs into a pretty dress and high heels. Greet me at the door on your knees. Do that and I can be more generous about what I’ll let you wear— my shirt maybe, no bra, and have the top three– no, top four buttons undone.”
“The buttons stay done and I’m wearing pants too. I’ll be more generous and doll up for you if you give me a reason to.”
“Is having me as a husband not reason enough?”
She scoffed. “What's so special about having you as a husband? You aren't even here to feed your starving wife. Instead you're plotting to keep me cold and hungry.”
“I'm not planning to keep you cold and hungry. I'm planning to keep you well fed and naked for my pleasure. Feeding me is part of your job and I’d be taking it off your shoulders and feeding you myself. I would just be helping you with your wifely duties. In return, I just want you to put all your energy into your most important duty as a wife.”
“Most important? What would that be?” She asked, her voice dripping with lust.
“Being a good fuck for me.”
“I am a good fuck. A great fuck. You’d know that if you were here.” I could hear the hurt in her voice when she said, “But, I can’t really be of service when you forget about me and fly off to a foreign country every now and then.”
“Jagiya… I miss you dearly,” I confessed. We were trying to have a baby and saving up money to buy a house. So, we’d both been working long tiring hours. Unfortunately for us, my work took me away from home often. I told myself that it was just temporary– that we’d return to normal once we made the downpayment on the house. But as the days passed, it felt like the new normal. “And I haven’t forgotten you. You’re always in my thoughts and I can’t wait to be with you when I’m home. But until then, I have to do this. I should make some money. For our future.”
She sighed and said, “Yeah yeah I know, don't get so crabby. Maybe you should have breakfast early. You sound grumpy. Wear a scarf and an overcoat when you go out. It's really cold there.”
“It is especially cold here today…” I was able to survive with just my suit jacket yesterday, but today it looked like I’d need a sweater and an overcoat.
“I know. I check the weather forecast for New York everyday.”
“You do? That is so sweet in a nerdy way.” She cared. It never failed to warm my heart to be reminded of how much she cared about me. At first, I thought it was just her small-town girl naivety, but her kindness was all her unbridled love for the people in her life.
“Hmm, I know you like being romanced in a nerdy way. Maybe we can talk about our annual household budget over a candlelit dinner?”
I laughed at that and said, “You know me so well. We’re having dinner at Jungsik once I come home, okay?”
“Jungsik is expensive. You don’t have to woo me with a Michelin star restaurant, okay? Just buy me streetfood and fuck me however you like. And please don’t buy me too many gifts like last time. If you have to stay away from me to make money, don’t spend it on gifts. Save it for the house.”
Aish! She was always weird about money. In the early stages of our friendship, I bought her some snacks and she promised to pay me back once she got a job. She still had the receipt six years later even though the ink faded long ago. “It’s not about wooing you. I just don’t want to be one of those men who stop putting effort into their relationship after getting married. The gifts I buy you aren’t expensive enough to make a dent on the house funds. And they’re a way for me to show that I love you.”
“Show who? Not me. I already know you love me. You do it as some weird status symbol thing– putting me in expensive dresses and nice jewelry and showing me off to your colleagues. I’m not gonna lie, it kind of turns me on in a weird way that you want me on display hanging off your arms like I’m just your pretty little thing. But you have to reel in the spending, okay?”
“Okay. What can I buy for you, then? I might go shopping tonight after work. Just tell me one thing you want.”
“What did I just tell—”
“Just one thing, come on,” I begged, interrupting her scolding. She stayed silent for a few seconds and sighed, a sign that she was giving in.
“Fine. Only one thing. Something small. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“Oh and don’t buy a pack of cigarettes. I know you’ll use how cold it is as an excuse to smoke.” She knew me well, but she was a bit too late in her warning. She never liked that I smoked. I managed to hide my habit from her for years until she caught me when she moved into my apartment. At first she thought it was sexy, but began pushing me to stop when she realized that it was a habit.
“Yeobo… I already bought a pack. They’re cheaper here. And nicer.” I could’ve easily lied to her, just said okay and ended the conversation. But she hated my lies more than my smoking.
She sighed before saying, “Can you just try the nicotine gum please? I don't care about the nicotine, it's the tobacco that's really really bad for you. I know they have those nicotine gums in America.”
“Okay, I will,” I said, not even believing it myself.
___________________
Her: Are you planning to come home or not?
Me: Stuck in traffic. Maybe you can use this time to look pretty for me?
Her: I already do…
Me: Show me.
Her: You’ll see when you come home
Me: Give me a sample. Please.
My phone dinged as it loaded the picture she sent, stopping my heart as I took in the curves of her body in the red dress I bought her from my last trip abroad. She looked sinful. It was on the slutty side, revealing the curves of her breasts and her beautiful back. She never wore it outside, uncomfortable with how much of her body it exposed. But, she put it on at home just for my eyes. While I liked her in this dress, it was not suitable for what I had planned for her.
Me: I love it. You look like desire personified.
Her: Aww someone’s a little romantic all of a sudden… Missed me too much?
Me: I did. The dress is great, but I want you to wear something else for me.
Her: I like this one. It makes me look sexy
Me: Everything makes you sexy. Like that white dress with the lace you wore to your friend’s birthday. Put that on.
Her: Eh, I’ll pass. I don’t like that dress
Me: I thought you were dressing up for me.
Her: I am
Me: Then wear what I tell you to.
Her: I don’t like that dress anymore! Besides, it’s a cutesy dress. Not a sexy one
Me: Don’t argue with me.
Her: He comes back to Seoul and goes straight to work, neglects his wife he hasn’t seen in one and a half months and has the audacity to tell her to change her outfit after she spent an hour getting ready for him 🙄
An hour? I suddenly felt a little guilty. I just showered at the airport before work and washed my face with hand soap in my office bathroom.
Me: Yes. I do what I want. And you do what I tell you to. Change.
Her: No. I already put on my make up and I’ll have to start again for the white dress
Did she do her make up differently for each dress? I had never noticed. So clearly, it wouldn’t affect me if her make up didn’t match her white dress.
Me: Not my problem. Change or else.
Her: Or else what
Me: I won’t let you cover up the bruises I leave on your body when I fuck you today
Her: Oh? You’ve been neglecting me for so long. I doubt you still remember how to leave bruises on my body
Me: I haven’t forgotten anything. But it seems you don’t remember how to be respectful to your husband.
Her: 🙄 That’s your fault, Oppa. If you want me to know my place, you should put some effort into showing me my place
Me: Or you can simply listen to your husband. Make my life easy.
Her: Where is the fun in that?
Me: It’s fun for me. I love it when you do things without me having to tell you.
Her: I also love it, but you still don’t buy the groceries without me telling you 100 times. I’ll start being an obedient little wife when you can buy tomatoes without reminders from me 🙄
Me: You know I don’t suffer brats. Do what I say. End of discussion.
Her: 😑 fine. This better be good or I’ll be so pissed
I smiled at the text and scrolled up to see the picture she sent me again. God, she was a sight. Either she’d grown more beautiful in the time I was away or being separated from her for a month made me more desperate to have her. All those lonely nights in my hotel room wanking off to pictures of her were torture. We spoke on the phone, of course. But nothing compared to the closeness I felt with her when we fucked.
I took a drag of my cigarette and rolled down a window as I fantasized about her in the white dress. She better have listened to me. If she didn’t, it was her loss.
The traffic moved slowly and it felt like I would never reach home, but by some miracle I finally did. My eyes fell on our bedroom window as I counted the notes in my wallet to pay the driver. There she was, waving at me from the window, my dutiful wife in the beautiful white dress I asked her to wear. Seeing her put a smile on my face immediately. I hurried the counting and gave my driver the cash, not bothering to wait for the change or thank him for driving me through all that traffic. I dragged my suitcase to the front door, reaching just in time for her to open the door.
The white lace hugged her body tight until it reached her waist from where it flared out. If she twirled, she’d look like a beautiful doll you would buy for a child. Her makeup was light and that was about everything I could say about it. She looked so sweet, so pure in the dress that hid her sinful body so well. Anyone who saw her on the streets dressed like this wouldn’t take her for the kind of woman who would pose nude for her husband to take pictures to wank off to.
She leapt into my arms and I wrapped my arms tightly around her. I hummed in relief as I breathed in the familiar scent of her perfume, finally feeling relaxed and at home. I loved the work I did. It gave me purpose, the drive to achieve and climb the ladder. But, after a long day’s work– a month and a half in this case– there was nothing better than coming home to my wife.
“I missed you so much,” I said, placing a kiss on her head.
She looked up from my chest, giving me a sweet smile. “I missed you too, Oppa.”
I bent down to kiss her, but she recoiled and pushed at my chest.
“Come on, give me a kiss,” I said, pulling her close to me but she attempted to wriggle out of my arms.
I brought my lips close to her again, but she turned her head away. “You smell of cigarettes. Like you smoked every single pack they had in America.”
“It was a stressful day. I was angry that I couldn’t come home straight to you after missing you for so long,” I said, caressing her hair.
“Yeah, that’s not going to work on me. And everyday is stressful for you. Go shower,” she said, walking away, depriving me of the kiss I was looking forward to ever since our last one from a month and a half ago.
“I’ll go shower after you kiss me,” I grumbled, grabbing her by her wrist. She tried to shrug me off, but I tightened my grip on her.
“I’ll kiss you after you shower,” she said, turning around to burn holes into me with her eyes.
I tugged her towards me, grabbed her by her throat and slammed her against the wall. She shoved at my chest, but her strength was nothing compared to mine as I claimed her lips in a kiss. As hard as I tried, she refused to kiss back. I bit her bottom lip and she cried out, giving me room to slip my tongue into her mouth.
With no response from her, I pulled back and glared at her. “You’re going to deny me a kiss?”
“I don’t want to kiss you,” she mewled, struggling to speak with my hand around her throat. I loosened my grip enough to let her speak, but not so much so that she wouldn’t feel my authority. “But I think you should kiss me anyway.”
A guttural growl escaped my throat, making her flinch. “You don't get to tell me what I should do with you. Your job here is to just shut up and be a good set of holes for me to take. Is that understood?”
She cowered under my gaze, too stunned to speak. She gasped as I choked her harder. Her dainty hands came up to her throat and tried futilely to pry my hand away.
She flinched as I screamed, “Is that understood?”
“Please don't do this... let's... let's talk. Please,” she stammered over her words.
I tilted my head slightly and gave her an unamused smile. “Maybe that's the problem… I let you talk too much and you start thinking you’re allowed to talk back to me.”
Her voice lowered to a whisper as she pleaded, “Please, no…”
“Shh... Now, be a good girl for me.”
“Please, don't do this. I'll do what you say, just don't do this.”
“It's a bit too late for that. Now, shut up like I told you to or you'll make me angrier.”
“Don’t hurt me, please,” she said, rooted to the spot with her back to the wall, her eyes looking around frantically. I took her hand in mine and gave it a squeeze. She squeezed back, letting me know it was alright to proceed. It was our mechanism for us to let each other know during such sexual adventures that we were still comfortable with what was going on. If she squeezed my hand back, we were good to go. If she didn’t, I stopped everything. We had safewords, but we had this too.
I traced the lacy neckline of her dress with my index finger, enjoying her trembling under my touch. There was an innocent little pink ribbon fashioned into a bow at the center in between her breasts. It made the modest dress look even more innocent. Above the ribbon rested the heart-shaped pendant I gifted her for our first wedding anniversary. I flipped the pendant to its backside, revealing the engraving of my name. Mine.
I brought both hands to the center of her dress and pulled it apart with all my strength, making her gasp as the dress ripped in the center. I tugged harder, making the tear deeper until her bra was exposed to me.
“That was a nice– aah!” she cried as I slapped her on the cheek.
“So irreverent,” I mumbled, stroking her cheek with my thumb. She pouted up at me, her eyes brimming with tears. “I bought you the dress and I’ll do whatever I want with it,” I said, reaching into her bra and pushing the cups aside to expose her breasts. I took my phone out of my pocket and took a few pictures of her in her state between innocence and slutty. It would be a great help when I next travel.
“Were you a good girl when I was gone?” I asked, lifting her chin up to meet my eyes.
“Yes, Oppa,” she said, nodding.
“Look at you, lying to me without hesitation,” I said through gritted teeth, slapping her again. She gasped and struggled in my grip, her tears now escaping her eyes and running down her cheeks. My cock twitched as I took in the sight of my innocent little wife so deliciously exposed and so in fear of what I would do to her.
“I’m not lying, I promise.”
“You’re sure?” I raised an eyebrow at her as I bunched up the skirt of her dress around her waist. I let my hand travel up her legs slowly, barely touching her yet making her shiver. I touched her through her panties, finding her wet and ready for me. “Liar,” I said, slipping her panties aside and feeling her deliciously wet cunt.
“What did I tell you?” I asked, slipping a finger inside her.
“Not to touch myself.”
“And what were you doing?”
“I just wanted to be ready for you,” she whined defensively, earning another slap. Her cunt clenched around my fingers and I slapped her a few more times to savor the feeling.
“You’re lying again. Why didn’t you kiss me if you really were preparing your cunt for me, huh?” I asked, wiping the slick from one pair of her lips on her other.
“I want you, but not like this…please. Please just shower. I hate the cigarette smell.”
“Oh?” I said, reaching into my pocket and retrieving my lighter and a cigarette from the pack I brought back from my trip. I forced the lighter into her hand and slipped the cigarette between my lips and gestured with my eyes to light it for me. When she hesitated, I squeezed her neck, reminding her of what I would do if she did not follow my orders.
My hand left her throat and took her hand, squeezing once again to check if she was okay with my demand. She had told me several times that it was unnecessary for me to check so frequently, that she would use her safeword if I happened to cross a line, but I needed to check for my own peace of mind. Especially with such extreme play. She quickly squeezed back before lighting my cigarette.
I sucked on it, blowing the smoke out without inhaling any. She wrinkled her nose and turned her head away from me. I grabbed her chin and forced her to look at me before blowing out more smoke in her face. “Do you have something to say?” I asked before slipping it back between my lips. I smirked down at her as she shook her head and gave me a drunken smile.
I unbuckled my belt with one hand and pulled it off my pants. I passed the metal end behind her neck and let the buckle rest on her throat before passing the other end through it, creating a makeshift collar and leash. I tightened it around her before pulling her along with me towards the sofa. I sat back comfortably as she kneeled at my feet, her eyes begging to be let go.
“Is my smoking such a turn off?” I asked after blowing a puff of smoke in her direction.
Her shoulders slumped and she shook her head.
“Good. Continue with what you were doing before I came home,” I said, finding her cunt with the tip of my shoe. “I want to see what’s so good about touching yourself when I explicitly forbid you.”
“Oppa…please,” she begged, her voice choking with emotion. “I’m sorry, I won’t do it again.”
“What are you so afraid of? I just want to know. Go on, fuck yourself for me.”
She reached under her skirt and touched herself. I would’ve made her move her skirt to display herself for me, but I liked this better. It retained some of her innocence. My pretty little wife, dress torn, tits out, my belt wrapped around her delicate neck as she touched herself for me to watch— what more could a man want…
“You know how many nights I spent wanking off to you in my room? Thinking about how my obedient wife was depriving herself when I was away? And here you were all along, touching yourself. Breaking the rules, disobeying me. I understand why you want to keep touching yourself. It’s such an agony for me to keep my hands off you. But at some point, you should learn that your cunt is not yours to touch.”
She nodded, her eyes focused on me as her hands went to work under her skirt. I pulled her up by the belt and blew the smoke in her direction. I smiled as she sobbed from the humiliation, her hand moving noticeably faster. More tears flooded out, ruining her mascara as they rolled down her cheeks in dark grey droplets.
She was so good for me, so fucking perfect. She was the intelligent doctor who saved lives, the sweet respectful girl I introduced to my family, the elegantly dressed lady when she accompanied me to work events, the sweet wife who texted me during a busy day at work, the cockslut who begged to be broken and fucked as I liked. She was everything in one diminutive package.
Normally, she would kick me out for smoking at home. But now, she was getting off to me blowing smoke in her face. Perfect package, indeed.
I freed her necklace from under my belt and took another look at my name on the pendant. Her friends thought it was the most romantic thing that I presented her with a pendant with my name on it. Each time they did, she was reminded of the actual reason she had it on— because I wanted anyone who looked at her to know who she belonged to. I wanted them to take a look at the hickeys she tried so hard to cover, look at my name around her neck and know to whom she afforded the privilege.
“God, I can fucking smell your desperate cunt. Says something about your little drama about hating it when I smoke. You love it, don’t you? You love it when I smoke around you.”
She whimpered a meek, “No.” I threw my head back in laughter at her defiance.
“Stubborn bitch,” I said, still smoking. I dropped the belt to the floor but kept my hold on it under my shoe. I used my free hand to grab her breast, and fondled it lazily. I blew one last cloud of smoke in her face before I inhaled the smoke fully. I took her free hand and placed it on my cock. The expert that she was, she wrapped her delicate hand around me, stroking so lightly that I wasn’t in danger of coming but with enough pressure for me to feel good. Her hand on my cock combined with the smoke in my lungs was enough to relax me.
I found my foot on uneven ground and looked down to see the marker we used for writing down our chores on the whiteboard. Grinning, I bend down to pick it up. A smile slowly built up on her lips as I uncapped the marker.
I pulled her closer and she closed her eyes, her knowing smile letting me know she had guessed exactly what was coming. I took the tip of the marker to her chest, enjoying as the ink glided over her beautiful skin to spell out ‘Sang-woo’s slut’. My name looked quite good on her breasts. I took to the other side and scribbled out ‘Disobedient Whore’, smiling as I admired my work.
I alternated between inhaling the smoke and exhaling into her face, taking a few pictures of her here and there to document how stunning she looked. Her moans grew louder as I showed her the pictures. Behind the last cloud of smoke, her face contorted in pleasure.
I put my cigarette out in the glass of water on the side table and pushed her to lie down. I spread her legs apart and hiked her skirt up before prying her hand off her cunt. She cried and tried to free her hand from my iron grip, but I did not relent. With my other hand, I touched her, feeling just how sopping wet she was before slapping her cunt. She yelped and closed her legs, locking her knees together to keep me from hitting her again. I forced her legs apart effortlessly. A few more slaps to the disobedient hole and her building orgasm crashed and ruined, giving her just a glimpse of what she could have had as it fizzled out into an unsatisfying end.
“Were you going to come? Were you going to come, breathing in the smoke I blew out?” I taunted, pinching her swollen clit between my thumb and index finger, making her kick her legs around in pain.
“Nooo!” She screamed as I pinched her again.
As I felt around under her skirt, my hand caught something unexpected and cold. I ran my fingers over it tentatively as I tried to discern just what it was. I pulled at it and she hissed through gritted teeth. “What a lovely surprise,” I drawled, leering at her.
“Please don’t,” she whimpered, clenching her ass as I tried to remove the plug.
“How can I not when you’ve prepared your holes so well for me, hmm?” I taunted, pushing and pulling the plug. We’d been dating only for a few months when we were talking about what we’d like in bed as we watched porn together. After some teasing and persuading, she buried her shy smile in my chest and mentioned that she was interested in anal. Her confession aroused me so much that I couldn’t resist breaking the law. I managed to sneak the buttplug into the country when I was coming back home from the US some years ago.
“Please…” she whimpered, her thighs still shaking from her ruined orgasm. “You can’t do this to me, please. I’m your wife…”
“Hmm, I am allowed to do this because you’re my wife.”
“Not now, please… Not like this. I’ll let you take me later, just not now.”
I snorted. “Let me? Who are you to let me?” I asked flipping her over and positioned her with her ass exposed to me. She wriggled out of my grasp and ran to our front door. I caught up to her and held her back by her leash.
“You‘re going to run away?” I mocked her with a pout and tugged my belt, letting it choke her. “Are you going to escape? Do you think someone will rescue the slut with her tits out for everyone to see? They might just take a piece of you for themselves. Will you go to the police? Complain about your husband? Do you think they’ll believe me, a respectable businessman or the wanton slut who has her ass plugged? And my name is right there on your body… They might just return you to me, ask me to take better care of my property.” I said as I moved my hands up the belt, pulling her closer the farther above I got. I uncapped the marker with my teeth and spat out the cap.
She slid down to the floor as she sobbed, hugging her knees to her chest and hiding her face from me. I didn’t like that… I wanted to see her tears, taste my victory in her submission. I forced her head up and her knees apart. She no longer resisted my touch, letting me move her around and expose her to my eyes. I took the marker to her skin again, writing, ‘If lost, return to Cho Sang-Woo- 011 246 7871’. I forced her up on her feet and unlocked the door. “You are free to go now,” I said, grabbing her by her once perfectly done hair as I opened the door. She hugged me in an attempt to keep herself inside the house as I pushed her out the door. I lifted her up as she accidentally stepped on the threshold. I wasn’t going to stop taking care of her even when pretending to kick her out of our home.
“Come on, get out. Didn’t you want to run?” I asked, tilting her chin up gently.
“I’m sorry,” she wailed, wrapping her legs around my waist. “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry— please! Please don’t do this to me.”
“Why not?” I asked, frowning. “Our neighbors would love to see you. I have seen a lot of them drool over you when you walk by. Don’t you always say we should be good neighbors? Let me take the first step, share my toy with them.”
“No, no,” she whimpered, dropping to her knees and hugging my legs. She looked up at me, her eyes begging for mercy. “Please, I beg of you. Please.”
“Aww, how adorable…” I cooed. “Alright then, get the plug out for me,” I said, patting her cheek in a condescending manner.
“No, please. I don’t want to,” she pouted through her tears.
“Aish! I gave you two options, both of which you were prepared for— one, staying put as I take your ass which your have so generously prepared for me. Or two, getting out, which you tried to do only seconds ago. But now you reject both. What am I supposed to do with you?”
“I can’t, please. It’ll hurt,” she mewled, shrinking into herself.
“It will hurt?” I gasped, tilting my head and placing a hand on my heart. “That is quite unfortunate. For you. I think I’ll quite enjoy it. Actually, no. It is very fortunate. I will enjoy it even more knowing that you’ll be in pain. Thank you for letting me know,” I said, pushing her to lie on the rug face-first. I looked down on her, stepping on her ass through her pure white dress as I reached into my pocket for another cigarette. I lit it myself this time and hummed in satisfaction as I felt a faint burn in my lungs from the smoke.
The delicious sound of her sobs accompanied by the nicotine sent a high through my body, making me feel euphoric. I thought she’d stop putting up a fight by now, but she continued wriggling under my shoe and begging to be let go. While I liked breaking her and putting her in her place, I liked it more when she fought uselessly as I took my pleasure from her unwilling body. I took two puffs of my cigarette before I unzipped my pants, freeing my painfully hard cock.
I knelt on the ground, her struggling body trapped between my legs. I squeezed her hand again. Just in case. Just for my own satisfaction. She squeezed back.
She relaxed as I gave her a comforting rub on her back. I pulled the buttplug out gently and it came out with a very faint wet sound that I wouldn’t have heard if she weren’t silent for me. Some of the lube she used to get it in leaked out and I managed to gather some of it, smearing it on my cock before I inserted the tip inside.
She breathed hard and loud in between her sobs. I pulled out, giving her time to adjust before pushing back in slowly. She inhaled sharply and put her hand up. I exhaled the smoke, put my cigarette back between my lips and took her hand.
“Hold me…please,” she whimpered. I obliged, intertwining our fingers. I plucked my cigarette out of my lips and put it out on her dress, making sure it was the floor on the other side and not her body.
“Yes…” I moaned as I felt her walls tightening around my cock as I pushed in and out. “You like that?”
“No!”
“Good.”
“Stop, please!”
“BEG ME,” I demanded, my nails digging into her plump ass.
“Please, I can’t! It hurts so bad. I— please Oppa, I’ll do anything. Anything but this! Let me go,” she cried, kicking her legs. I turned back swiftly and pushed the glass coffee table behind us out of the way in case she kicked it and hurt herself. I ran my fingers through her hair and pulled hard, making her scream between her sobs. She tightened around me, sending a ripple of pleasure throughout my body. I pulled again and again just to recreate that feeling.
“Good girl, good little fucktoy, cry for me,” I grunted, thrusting in.
She whimpered and whined pathetically into her hand, the muffled sounds encouraging me to thrust harder and faster. Her cries made my cock harder, made me want to hurt her more just for that hit of pleasure I got from her pain. Her sobs for mercy sent a rush of power through my veins.
I bit down on my lip as she clenched around my cock. Her thighs trembled and her cries grew more animalistic before she came down screaming my name. I lied on her, imposing the weight of my body on hers as I grunted into her ear.
“God, what a whore,” I blurted as I thrust in and out. “What kind of woman comes with a cock in her ass? Such a deceptive little bitch, walking around the streets like a good, respectable woman, pretending to be an innocent little thing,” I whispered into her ear as she stared mindlessly into the distance, her body still shivering from the effects of her orgasm. She pushed up against me and I lifted my body off of her for long enough to let her slip a finger inside her cunt.
A soft strangled sound escaped her. “I— I’m respectable! I don’t… I don't like this!”
“Stop lying to yourself. You just came for me. And you’re still touching yourself. A good woman likes to be taken gently on a bed. You like being thrown around and beaten and forced to debase yourself. You’re just a common whore in a pretty dress.”
“Fuuck!”
“What will people think of you when they—” I stopped to catch my breath. “What will they think of the whore who plugs her ass under her pretty lace dress?”
“Sang-Woo!” She mewled, sending ripples of pleasure through my body. Being much younger than I was, she rarely ever said my name. It was always a sweet ‘Oppa’ in front of others and ‘Yeobo’ when in the privacy of our home. Hearing my name from her lips was a rare blessing, a goddamn weapon that she knew how to wield against me.
More pliant from her recent orgasm, she tightened around me quickly, screaming my name again as she came.
My vision faded to black. A fire of desire pooled in my abdomen and muscles tensed up. I knew there was no way for me to stall, no way to extend the euphoria of being inside her as the world disappeared around me and there was just her, still moaning my name in her shaking voice. My lips cried out every expletive it knew as I hit the peak of pleasure and quickly came down, spilling inside her.
I nuzzled my face in her neck, breathing in the intoxicating smell of her perfume combined with our sweat and our lust. I placed a soft kiss on her jaw and she moaned in satisfaction.
I could hear her smile in her voice when she said, “Welcome home, Yeobo.”
I laughed and placed another kiss on her soft skin. “That was a warm welcome. A hot, tight, welcome,” I teased as I rolled off her. She shoved me and hid her face behind her hand, but I could see her shy smile between her fingers.
“I missed you so much.” I took her hand and placed gentle kisses on the back.
“I miss my dress more,” she said, sticking her tongue out at me.
“I’ll buy you a new one.”
“I don’t want a new one, I want this one.”
“Problem solved, you still have this one. You can wear it out for dinner with me this weekend,” I teased. She gasped, offended, before throwing her hands at me. I pretended to block them, but let her slap me as much as she wanted. They didn’t even hurt.
“About that kiss, Jagiya…” I trailed, leaning in. She grabbed my face and squished my cheeks together before pushing me away. I laughed. Still no kiss then. The woman just let me smoke all over her but wouldn’t give me a goddamn kiss.
“Go brush your teeth, steam engine,” she said, sticking her tongue out.
Fine, I’ll just work for it.
_______________________________________________________________________
Cho Sang-Woo Masterlist
Read my fics on AO3
Sang-Woo would (and does) kill for money and I would kill for comments and reblogs. Feed your local fanfic writer pls
#squid game#squid game fic#cho sang woo#cho sang woo fanfic#cho sang woo x reader#cho sangwoo x reader#cho sang woo x ofc#cho sang woo x you#smoker’s heart
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hi, sorry, I've been kind of having problems. i dont think people are capable of loving me, and I think everyone its going to leave me alone at the end of the day. so, can I request a scenario for izuku, kirishima and denki meeting the reader that happens to feel like this? it's okay if you don't want to do it
have a nice day ♡



Them Finding Out Their S/o/Crush Thinks People Are Incapable of Loving Them || Midoriya, Kirishima, and Kaminari

Masterlist 1 || Masterlist 2
↠Author’s Note: I’m struggling with this as well so I sort of based it a little bit off of my own feelings/habits since they’re probably fairly similar to yours but apologies if they’re not. Also ik you requested scenarios but I felt that headcanons would be a bit easier for me to write, and also I did it more them finding out their s/o/crush feels that way than them just meeting them, so I hope that’s fine! If not I can redo these. But I hope you like these! I’m sorry you feel that way :( But people do care about you and love you! -Danielle <3
↠Characters: Izuku Midoriya, Eijiro Kirishima, and Denki Kaminari x Reader
↠Summary: Them finding out that their s/o/crush thinks that people are incapable of loving them and that everybody is going to leave them eventually
↠Genre: Comfort/fluff
↠Word Count: 1.2k
↠Warnings: Reader thinks that nobody loves them and that everybody’s going to leave them
↠Notes: None


Izuku Midoriya:
When you two first started hanging out and becoming friends, he took notice to how you always were kind of distant, like you were trying not to get attached to him or anything, and that kind of hurt his feelings
Why were you so distant? Did you not want to be his friend? He thought that for a while and he was venting to Uraraka about it and she was like “if they didn’t want to be your friend they would make excuses not to hang out with you, and ignore your texts, but they don’t, right?” and then he realized that it might be something deeper than just you not wanting to be his friend
Eventually, he worked up the courage to confess his feelings for you, and he wasn’t sure what to expect, but it definitely wasn’t what happened
He expected maybe a “oh, sorry I see you as a brother” or “I don’t really like you that way, sorry” or something just as heartbreaking as a response to his, “I think I love you!” that he blurted out after stuttering
But what he didn’t expect was a plain and simple, “No you don’t”
Like, what? How are you going to go around saying what he feels? Plus, did you just accuse him of lying? He wasn’t a liar!
“Y/n, what do you mean, ‘no you don’t’? Because, yes, I do. Why do you think I’m lying?”
And after you explained your reasoning, that people were incapable of loving you and that everybody would just end up leaving you at the end of the day, Izuku was very shocked and he didn’t bother hiding it
How could you feel that way about yourself? You were so amazing and fun and you were such a good friend! Why wouldn’t somebody be able to love you? Because Izuku sure did and he definitely had no intentions of leaving, not now, and he wasn’t sure that he ever would
He wasn’t sure where it came from, but when you said that, he got this sudden burst of confidence, he put away his shy, stuttering self to reassure you that he loved you very much, and that he was never going to leave you
“That’s not true, Y/n! You’re so amazing, and so pretty/handsome, and you’re literally one of my best friends! It’s definitely not impossible to love you, because I do! And if I ever even think about abandoning you then go ahead and take away my quirk because I don’t deserve it if I would do something like that to someone as perfect as you!”
If you’re anything like me, then you’re definitely not going to believe him the first time he says this, or the second, or even the third, but he’s going to continue to say it and do actions to prove it until you believe that he loves you and is never going to leave you

Eijiro Kirishima:
He didn’t really interpret you being a little distant as you not wanting to be friends with him, at least not at first, he just figured you were a little nervous or shy (and maybe you are) but after you didn’t really begin to warm up to him, he did get a little insecure, and start to think that maybe you just didn’t like him
But he didn’t want to stop talking to you if that wasn’t the truth and if you actually wanted to keep being his friend, so he confronted you about it one day
You two ended up in the kitchen together at like 12 am, you had both been getting a snack and he decided to confront you while you were waiting for your food to cook in the microwave
“Hey, Y/n, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable or anything, but is there a reason you’re distant with me? If you don’t want to be my friend or I’m making you uncomfortable then just let me know! I’ll leave you alone or whatever.”
And then after you replied that you knew he didn’t really like you (as a friend or romantically) and that you knew he was just going to end up leaving you, and that you didn’t want to get your feelings hurt again, his first response was simply, “What?”
He meant as in like, he didn’t feel that way at all, why would you think that? But you took it as, you were right and everything you said was true, so then you went on a whole rant about how it was fine and you weren’t mad at him or anything and you didn’t hate him for it
Mans had to force himself not to run over to you and give you the biggest hug he could possibly give because he didn’t want to make you uncomfy, but at the same time he just wanted to hug you and cuddle you for hours
So, he settled for interrupting you halfway through
“No, no, no! Shut up! I don’t think that, I love you! Why do you think nobody loves you or that they can’t? And I’m definitely not going to leave you! Who told you that? Because I have a few things to say to them.” And when you didn’t reply, he spoke again, “Can I give you a hug?”
And after a small nod, you were immediately in the red head’s arms, your body being squished between his arms, as he hugged you as tight as he possibly could without squishing your insides and accidentally killing you

Denki Kaminari:
Also took you being kinda distant as you being shy, but eventually he came to the conclusion that he was making you uncomfy or you just didn’t like him
So, he apologized to you one day after class, “Hey! I realized I was making you uncomfortable and I’m really sorry about that! Or maybe you just don’t want to be my friend, and that’s fine too! I’ll just be on my way, thanks for putting up with me!”
But after you replied with that you did like him, and think he was cool, you just knew that he was faking it, and that he was going to end up leaving, he was like “Huh?”
Did you really think he was that much of a jerk? Like sure, he flirts with a lot of people, but you were different! He paid way more attention to you than anybody else, and you were his first choice out of everybody, did he really give off that vibe that he didn’t really like you?
“What!? No! That’s not true. I mean, I know I flirt with a lot of people, but I really like you, I’m sorry if I came off as if I didn’t.”
And then when you continued to insist that he didn’t like you, he was starting to get a little more pissed off. Why didn’t you believe him!? He really liked you, why couldn’t you see that!
Anyway, then he went on a whole rant about how great you were and how much he liked you and all of that, and how he was going to work super hard to make sure that you knew what he was saying was the truth

#izuku midoriya x reader#izuku x reader#izuku midoriya#midoriya x reader#midoriya comfort#eijiro kirishima x reader#eijiro x reader#kirishima x reader#eijiro kirishima#kirishima comfort#eijiro comfort#denki kaminari x reader#denki x reader#denki kaminari#kaminari x reader#kaminari comfort#denki comfort#mha#bnha#bnha x reader#mha x reader#mha headcanons#bnha headcanons#headcanons#headcanon post#mha comfort#bnha comfort
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Ok so I didn't know about the song Two Birds so I listened to it by curiosity and I am now filled with angst! ;~;
This reminds me so much of the Celestial War, how Lucifer probably thought Simeon would be on his side – on Lilith's side – until the end, but when came the moment to choose... even after showing signs of defiance, Simeon gave up on Lucifer.
"Two birds of a feather / Say that they're always gonna stay together / But one's never going to let go of that wire"
And that's probably why Lucifer is so refractory to any attempt at mending their relationship, because for what is probably HUNDREDS OF YEARS, the last memory of Simeon in Lucifer's mind was of a betrayal, of Simeon refusing to take that final jump with him at the very last moment.
I have this image in mind of the end of the War, of Lucifer beaten up on the ground, waiting to be sentenced. And when Michael and Raphael approach, Simeon puts himself in-between to try and reason with them. But Simeon is terrified, and when God orders him to choose between being judged with the brothers or to step aside, Simeon does just that, reluctantly. And he turns around towards Lucifer, who looks so betrayed – and that's Simeon's last memory of Lucifer until the events of the game.
And only Michael really gets why Simeon is devastated, but it's not enough so Simeon starts writing a story about a boy who makes friends with 7 Demon Lords and forms unbreakable bonds with them. But Simeon can't predict the future, he can't predict MC will ever exist. Therefore, Henry is Simeon's ideal self, the courageous man he wished he had been back then.
"Two birds on a wire / One tries to fly away and the other / Watches him close from that wire / He says he wants to as well, but he is a liar"
And then comes the end of S3, with Simeon finding some peace in the Human World after confronting his deepest fear... until Raphael comes back and Simeon just... gives up once again. Except this time MC is going to bring him back if I have any say in the matter.
(spoilers for lesson 52+!)
whenever i think about simeon and lucifer i get so emo(tional) aaa ;; and i always think back to that one scene in lesson 52-12 where mc spies on the two of them: simeon gazes upon lucifer's beautiful angelic form for the last time ever so despondently, the words that come out of his mouth are so bittersweet on his tongue, and lucifer is left so utterly confused when simeon opens his mouth and speaks of how happy he is to see his dearest friend when they see each other every day?
"I'll believe it all / There's nothing I won't understand / I'll believe it all / I won't let go of your hand"
oh, how they both treasured each other, wanted to keep each other so close, and how simeon knew that his idealistic future was not the fate lucifer was bound to, the pain simeon must've felt when he knew how much betrayal lucifer would feel once he chose the side of the celestial realm and lucifer tried to desperately reassure him that things will be okay. then again, the betrayal simeon must've felt when lucifer left him behind, all alone.
"Two birds on a wire / One says c'mon and the other says "I'm tired" / The sky is overcast and I'm sorry / One more or one less / Nobody's worried"
i've always thought of how simeon must view the mc for that very reason! simeon obviously began to write (thanks to levi's persistence in persuading simeon to write down all his stories) for himself, as a way to understand himself. if he had just taken different steps, as you said; if he had just been the one to help heal lucifer and his brothers...
and then the mc steps in, taking the place he wished he were in. gaining the love and respect of his once dearest friend, the same love and respect that no longer belongs to him,
i wonder how he processes it all?
the end of season 3 didn't need to hit that hard, but it did o(;△;)o as you said, he finally confronted his fear with the help of lucifer (which must've been a HUGE but very welcomed surprise for simeon), he confides in mc for comfort (as opposed to his usual nurturing nature, being the one to comfort others), and then raphael DARES to moonwalk his pretty little angel butt into simeon's humble café like
youtube
"miss me?" no sir please leave i beg of you don't strip the last sliver of hope simeon has for healing ple-
#i'm wistfully thinking that raphael may be there to help simeon but#will that really be the case#anyways your thoughts on this are just so TASTY like yes feed us more lucifer and simeon content based on the tag i wrote about two birds#such an angsty song that fit the two so perfectly#your thoughts? good soup.#obey me#obey me simeon#obey me lucifer#asks
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The Coordinates Of My Heart ~ JJK [Request]

WORD COUNT: 2.4K
GENRE: Angst, fluffy ending, established relationship
PAIRING: Jungkook x fem!reader
It was no secret that Jungkook had tattoos all over his body, everyone had seen them by now but not every single tattoo that covered him. There was one very secret tattoo that nobody except for you and Jungkook knew about...Well, you, Jungkook and his ex-girlfriend that was. It was only a small tattoo on his left peck but it was one of the biggest mistakes Jungkook had ever made in his life, the whole time he was getting his collection of tattoos he swore he would never have someone's name tattooed onto his body and yet there it sat. Black ink across his peck with her name in cursive writing with a small heart attached at the end, "SeoJun" The tattoo bothered you a lot but you would never let that show in front of Jungkook. You'd been dating for almost three years now so you never brought it up except for the first time he showed you. He wanted you to know that she meant nothing to him anymore but that it was there and something he had to deal with.
It was still a crushing feeling to see another girls name tattooed on his body and him always saying that he would never do it again, never tattoo a name across him anywhere on his body. You knew he was thinking rationally but there was a part of you inside that cried out to know why he wouldn't put your name on himself instead but the other part of you thought rationally. He probably didn't want to chance it by getting your name tattooed anywhere on himself and having the relationship fall through.
"Baby I'm so tired," Jungkook groaned that morning as he walked down the stairs to you in the living room he was shirtless and wearing a pair of shorts, you were trying to convince him to go swimming with you. It was his week off from the studio, he took it off to spend time with you but for the last six days he'd done nothing but lay in bed gaming or go out to dinner with his friends, or hang out with the boys.
"I'm only asking for this one thing baby...Please! I don't want to go alone." You giggled to him as you tugged on his hands trying to convince him to go with you, he looked at you tiredly as he shook his head.
"I'm busy today," He mumbled as he took his arm out of your grasp, ignoring the look of confusion written across your face as he walked into the kitchen. Jungkook hadn't told you he'd made plans with anyone which was why you'd woken him up in the first place if you'd have known he was busy you would have left him. Following after him, you went into the kitchen and he began to make himself something to eat,
"Busy with what? We haven't hung out all week, you said you took the week off to spend time with me." You uttered you knew it probably sounded as though you were being childish but right now you didn't care, you'd missed your boyfriend and this week it felt like you saw him less than you did when he was actually working.
"I actually said I took the week off to relax, so far I haven't done any of that." He grumbled as he began pouring himself a bowl of cereal, not meeting your eyes as he spoke. Rolling your eyes at him you shook your head,
"You've relaxed plenty, all you've done is game and sleep...As well as go to lunch, or spent time with friends...W-What if we went for walk instead? Namjoon said he found this really cute hiking trail..." You trailed off when you realised Jungkook was more interested in the phone that was sitting in his hand than he was in listening to you talk to him. The thought of him ignoring you was heartbreaking enough, you began to overthink everything, maybe he was getting bored of being with you...
"But of course, I wouldn't want to take you away from what is really important." You grumbled to him referring to the phone before storming out of the kitchen and into the living room to grab your swimming bag to go alone since he wasn't that bothered about you anymore.
"Are you upset because I won't hang out with you?! We don't have to be around each other 24/7 Y/n." He followed you into the living room staring into your eyes as he waited for you to say something back to him. He didn't mean for it to come out as harsh as the way it was.
"No, but it would be nice if my own boyfriend wanted to do something with me. Watch a movie, go for a walk, order food. All you've been bothered about is gaming or hanging with the guys, we haven't done anything this week." He rolled his eyes at you before going back into the kitchen without another word in your direction. You knew it wasn't supposed to start a fight but there was a part inside of you that wanted answers from him.
"Tell me I'm wrong then. Tell me one time this week you've even wanted or offered to hang out with me." You stated as you walked back into the kitchen, he put his bowl down into the sink shaking his head at you.
"I've been busy. I'm doing stuff all week, I don't need you jumping down my neck-" He stopped talking when his phone began to ring on the table in front of him for a second you could have sworn a panicked look spread across his face. Out of habit your eyes glanced down to see who it was but as soon as you saw the name you wish you hadn't. SEOJUN. Was written across the screen in big bold writing with a broken heart beside her name just like the tattoo Jungkook had only the heart was broken.
"W-Why is she calling you?" Instead of answering you Jungkook just turned the phone over so you couldn't see it and shook his head at the question.
"Jungkook..." You whispered feeling insecure at the thought of him starting to see her again, it wasn't that you didn't trust him. It was Seojun that you didn't trust. She was manipulative and cunning. She always got whatever it was she wanted if she used the right way on Jungkook it was like she had a spell on him.
"Y/n it's not what it looks like, she's just started to say sorry to me that's all. She wants to make up for all the awful things that happened, she opened up her new shop so I've been going to help-" The look on your face made Jungkook stop talking instantly and he knew he fucked up, it was a look of sadness and anger as you realised he'd been spending all of his time with her.
"S-So you've been spending time with her? On your week off..." He nodded his head slowly not wanting to lie to you about where he had been anymore,
"Because I knew if I told you, you would be upset-" He tried to rationalise it but you cut him off,
"Of course I would! You've been spending all of your free time with your ex-girlfriend and lying to me about it!" You yelled out as you stared down at his phone, it was starting to ring again but you both ignored it this time letting it go to voicemail.
"I was just helping out with her shop, she's straightened herself out." You scoffed at the thought of it all and the phone began to ring again, it was clear she wasn't going to quit calling him until he finally answered her call.
"So she's trying to get back with you?" You questioned as you stared at him folding your arms over your chest,
"No! She's trying to say sorry..." You rolled your eyes at the statement, at how naive he was being about all of it and began walking away from him not wanting to listen to this.
"Am I not allowed, friends?!" He snapped at you making you turn to face him you were angrier now at the fact that he was making it seem like you were forcing him not to talk to her,
"You can be friends with whoever you want...B-But didn't you think about how this would make me feel? Seeing her again? When she's literally tattooed across your chest?!" He heard the crack in your voice as you stormed out of the door, leaving him alone in the world of his own thoughts. He knew how much the tattoo hurt you even if you refused to show him that sometimes, he groaned picking up his phone to her.
"I'll be running late today, come by about 2 pm? The place will be empty and it'll be just me and you, like old times." He sighed as he heard her voice down the other side of the phone,
"We should stop, she's suspicious..." He whispered to Seojun as he walked out of the kitchen and towards the front door, you were sitting in the car so he walked up the stairs to talk.
You whimpered as you got into your car, starting up the engine and driving off towards the pool. You didn't even need to go, you just had to be out of the house for a while to let your brain cool down from what was happening, you were probably just overreacting to it all.
When you came in after swimming the house was empty, all of the lights were off so you knew Jungkook must have been out or up in bed asleep but it was only 7 pm so that was unlikely true. You dropped your keys down in the small bowl by the front door and kicked off your shoes wanting nothing more than to snuggle up beside Jungkook and say sorry for that morning but he wasn't there so you went for the next best thing. Having a shower and curling up in one of his shirts while you waited for him to come home, you'd left him some texts but if he was still upset about this morning you doubted he would answer you.
As you walked into the kitchen you saw a note on the door,
Went out to think. Don't wait up. Love you. x x x JJK x x x You smiled halfheartedly as you read the note from him to you and screwed it up before putting it into the bin. All you had to do was remind yourself that Jungkook loved you, he would never do anything to hurt you.
Later that night Jungkook pulled up outside the house and saw your car,
"I'll call you later, Y/n's home so I'm going to talk to her if she's awake," Jungkook said to Seojun who hummed before hanging upon him. He shut the door carefully and headed up to the front door, it was almost 12 pm so you were most likely asleep in bed but when he walked into the living room you were out cold on the sofa. Draped in one of his jumpers and a pair of shorts with a blanket around you, the TV was playing to itself all of their Bangtan bombs and he smiled to himself. At least you weren't too angry at him to fall asleep to his voice, he turned off the TV and headed into the kitchen.
A small hissing noise made you wake up when you heard small grunts of pain,
"Guk?" You moaned out as you rubbed your eyes, the kitchen light was on and the moaning was coming from there. Terror ripped through you at the thought of him and someone else being in there together but Jungkook would never do that...Would he? Slowly sliding off the sofa you tip-toed into the kitchen to see Jungkook with his back to you, he was hissing as he pulled something off his chest,
"Kookie? What's going on?" Jungkook jumped as your voice suddenly filled the air, he turned to face you and you saw what he was struggling to do. There was fresh clingfilm wrapped around his chest along with some pads,
"Jungkook?" You frowned walking further into the kitchen as you helped him take off the cling film,
"I did something." He mumbled as he took your hands into his own to stop you from removing the rest of it all,
"We have to talk..." You stared into his eyes waiting for him to continue and he looked down,
"I know how much the tattooed bothered you without you saying anything...That's the reason I've been seeing Seojun so much, she runs her own tattoo parlour instead of working for other people now..." You remembered him telling you once that she worked as a tattooist in someone else's shop,
"S-So you went to her to get a tattoo done? Why didn't you tell me?" He let go of your wrists and allowed you to keep unwrapping the clingfilm until it got to the end and the flower could be seen,
"Because we were working on something I couldn't tell you about," Sitting on his left peck, covering the entire muscle was a huge tattoo of your birth flower. Tears began to well up in your eyes as you stared at the masterpiece,
"The best part." He whispered as he took your hand carefully and lead it over to the middle of his chest, written in small black in were some coordinates.
"Do you know what that is?" You stared at them with a frown on your face shaking your head at him trying to work it out,
"It's the coordinates of where I first told you that I loved you," You stared at the coordinates before wrapping your arms around the back of his neck and dragging him into a passionate kiss. Tugging him closer to you until he hissed out in pain,
"S-Sorry, the tattoo is sore." He chuckled as you looked at it again,
"Where's your cream? I'll apply it and then we can go to bed?" You questioned as he nodded at you, telling you where the cream he used for all his tattoo's was kept and went to sit on the sofa for you. Smiling happily as he waited for you to come back to him.
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