#why paul graham writes well

[iamadarshbadri]

Notes on Paul Graham’s Writings About Writing

If you are someone looking for advice on writing, you rarely point to a computer geek turned entrepreneur for advice. In this essay, I take that plunge. Today, I want to discuss about Paul Graham. Prominently, his writing—and the advice he gives us on how we write and ought to write. Paul is a prominent figure in the tech world. He is known for his startup accelerator firm, Y Combinator, which…

[dragonflight203]

I’ve finally finished Knightfall.

As grateful as I am to have the saga in three omnibuses, they are mammoth reads. I might break Knightquest into three write ups to make it more manageable.

Comic

Title: Batman: Knightfall. Pages 315 – 330.

Author: Doug Moench, Chuck Dixon, Alan Grant

Artist: Jim Aparo, Norm Breyfogle, Graham Nolan, Jim Balent, Bret Blevins, Klaus Janson, Mike Manley

Year: 1993

Overall Opinion

Not as good as the first half, but still a good read.

While I’m grateful the omnibus includes Showcase – Two-face and Shadow of the Bat, they definitely disrupt the pacing of the main continuity. They’re written to be skippable, and while enjoyable reads they don’t forward the plot.

I still can’t say I’m enamored by Knightfall, but I am grateful to be reading it. It’s well written and continue to has some fantastic quotes.

Art

-The art in Batman and Detective Comics continues to be solid.

It’s a nice touch that Jean Paul as Batman is drawn slightly differently than Bruce. It’s easy to tell how someone unaware wouldn't notice a difference, but if you do know you can tell.

-The Showcase – Two-Face art is rougher, but appropriate for the story it tells. Not a favorite of mine but it works. I wish the faces were clearer.

-The stylized art in Shadow of the Bat is fantastic for the various segments with Scarecrow. It captures how menacing he is and how surreal his fear gas makes the world.

The dream and brainwashing sequences in particular are stand outs. Amazing artwork.

General

Batman/Detective Comics

-Throughout Knightfall, the mantle of Batman is treated as a representation of ideals rather than Bruce’s alter ego.

It’s a given that Batman will outlast Bruce. Batman will exist so long as those who believe in the ideals he stands for do.

Tim to Jean Paul on whether Bruce will be able to continue as Batman: “There’ll always be a Batman. Always.”

Once it’s established that Bruce is paralyzed, the question is who will take over the mantle. Not if someone will.

When Jean Paul begins to act erratically as Batman, Tim’s fear is that he will destroy the mantle by failing to uphold Bruce’s beliefs.

Tim: “Great – now I have to race him to the warehouse on foot… And I hope I get there before he destroys the mantle of the Bat for good.”

And Bane reinforces that Batman is a representation of a cause, not a person. To betray those ideals is to destroy Batman.

Bane, to Jean Paul after Jean Paul’s declared he’ll kill him: “So I have brought ruin to Wayne. And his neophyte brings ruin to the Batman.”

To be Batman is more than to wear the suit. It’s to be the Bat. Tim doesn’t accept Jean Paul fully as Batman until he’s believes Jean Paul will act as Batman should.

Tim: “You have earned it – earned the right… Earned the costume, new or old. And I guess you are… the Batman.”

-It’s treated as a given that only Dick or Jean Paul could take over as Batman.

No one considers Tim – not even Tim himself.

-Bruce doesn’t want to ask Dick to become Batman. Dick has his own life and his own responsibilities.

This is confirmed later, when Dick and Tim discuss why Bruce didn’t ask Dick to fill in for him and Dick says he would have accepted the mantle but wouldn’t have wanted to.

In this sense, Bruce is a good father – he wants Dick to live his own life, not be forced to follow in Bruce’s path.

-Jean Paul places a lot of emphasis on Bruce choosing him to be the new Batman.

However, it’s more that he was the only candidate available, since Bruce didn’t want to ask Dick to do it.

Bruce didn’t even speak to Jean Paul about it directly; Tim raised the topic to Bruce, then made the offer to Jean Paul.

Yet Jean Paul makes a lot of references to how the mantle is his now and how Bruce entrusted him with the position.

Showcase – Two-Face

-This is obviously written as a self-contained event outside the main continuity.

While it doesn’t directly contradict the events in Batman and Detective Comics, the timeline in those comics follow the lead-up to the Batman/Bane confrontation closely. There’s no space for the events in this showcase to occur.

The (very minor) Bruce/Tim conflict in the showcase is also conveniently wrapped up by the end and is never mentioned again in the main continuity.

-The showcase repeatedly states that Two-Face is one of the last Arkham inmates left to recapture.

This is odd, because the main continuity makes it clear that there are numerous inmates still loose. Bruce even notes just prior to rescuing the mayor that the ‘really dangerous ones’ are still free.

The chart of inmates to recapture shown after the Arkham break-out implies there are 36 (some are offpage); only nine have been recaptured by the time Batman confronts Bane.

And the author of this showcase was the author of the Batman comics! Doug Moench.

-The style of the showcase is very different than the main continuity. It feels ‘retro’ in its narration and presentation compared to them.

Shadow of the Bat

-Tim says that Bruce has a rule that they don’t wear their suits in the manor.

However, when Bruce referenced that rule earlier in the main continuity he said it was a promise he made to Alfred.

That still works – Bruce originally promised Alfred to keep the suits downstairs, then directed Tim to do so when he joined.

-Jean Paul’s feelings about Bane are another continuity snarl.

In the mainline continuity, he decides to go after Bane despite Bruce’s orders.

Jean Paul: “Then who will? I wear the mantle of the bat. I make the decisions. Bane is mine and mine alone. He thought I wasn’t challenging enough to even bother with once… I’ll show him he was wrong to underestimate me!”

Here, he says he promised Bruce he would not pursue Bane and will abide by that. He never made such a promise in the main continuity.

Jean Paul: “But I promised Bruce Waye. Bane is his. The rest of this evil city is mine!”

Plot

Batman/Detective Comics

-Bane calls Bruce Wayne a mask.

Bane: ‘…This “Bruce Wayne” is nothing but a mask – and one which no longer serves any purpose…”

-The fight between Bane and Bruce is far too long. It was obviously drawn out so the issue could end on Bane breaking Batman’s back.

-Bane’s also shitty through the fight.

If Bruce was at his best, he might be able to match him – but Bane deliberately wore him out beforehand so he’d be easier to take down.

Then he spends the whole fight bitching that Bruce isn’t a good match.

Bane: “You are already broken.”

Bane: “It is over. You are nothing. A disappointment!”

Bane: “Why don’t you fight?!”

Bane: “You’ve got no spine!”

Bane: “You have nothing!”

If he wanted a satisfying victory, he shouldn’t have exhausted Bruce beforehand.

-Why does Tim personally answer the door when Alfred runs to his house for help? Don’t the Drakes have servants?

-Bane’s certainly melodramatic enough for Gotham.

After breaking Bruce’s back in the cave, he carries Bruce into the city, climbs to the top of a building while carrying him, and then throws him off the building.

All so he can grandiosely announce himself as the new ruler of Gotham.

-Alfred says that Batman is more important to Bruce than his own life. He’d rather die than go to a hospital for treatment in costume.

Alfred: “The only life that’s important to him is his life as Batman. Take him to a hospital and you’ll expose Batman to be Bruce Wayne.

“You’ll save his body, certainly. But you will have killed the man.”

-Jonathan just couldn’t resist; he finally gave in and fear gassed Joker.

Joker truly is immune to the fear gas. Or maybe he just doesn’t react to it like a normal person.

(Didn’t Jonathan notice that it had no effect on Joker when they fear gassed the mayor earlier?)

-Aaand the partnership between Jonathan and the Joker ends with the Joker knocking Jonathan out. Can’t say I’m surprised.

-Alfred doesn’t tell Tim that that if Bruce doesn’t get his medicine in time, Bruce may be permanently paralyzed. He does tell Jean Paul.

In Alfred’s own way he does try to protect Tim… Just not physically.

-If I understand the panels correctly, the Ventriloquist shoots himself (via his puppets).

That’s a rather abrupt ending to an arc that had been drawn out over several issues.

I doubt that was the original plan; I wonder why it changed?

-Jim must have pulled some strings to get the medicine for Batman to Tim and Jean Paul.

For all that he’s Gotham’s most honest cop, he knows when to bend the rules. That’s why he can work with Batman.

Showcase – Two-Face

-Two-Face’s memory of Harvey, Gordon, and Batman meeting on the roof is obviously meant to invoke The Long Halloween.

But here, Batman ends the agreement with Harvey while he’s still the District Attorney - Harvey’s becoming too dark for Batman to work with.

This is when Two-Face considers Batman to have betrayed them.

-Bruce refuses to take Tim out with him as Batman, implying that it’s harder with Robin than by himself (oof!).

Bruce: “As you said, Robin, I’m tired. I don’t have enough for two... Lucky if I can cover my own back.”

-The theme from the main continuity that Batman can’t do everything by himself continues; once he gets into a fight he regrets not taking Robin with him. He’s too exhausted to easily deal with them like he should be able to.

-After Batman is captured and Two-Face tries him for his ‘crimes’, he considers Batman’s break-up with him among the greatest and demands an explanation for why Batman ended their partnership.

Two-Face: “You and we agreed to work together in the prosecution of Gotham’s criminal element! But you broke that agreement – turned on us! WHY?”

-Tim should know better than to use Alfred’s name in public when he’s dressed as Robin.

-Tim could have killed Two-Face by striking him in the head with a rock as he balanced on a construction beam, even if it was to save Batman’s life. Batman was right to scold him for that.

-It sure is convenient that the first thing Batman thinks of once he wakes up is the incident with Two-Face, so he and Tim can make up about it and it never needs to come up again.

Batman/Detective Comics

-Prior to his defeat to Bane, Bruce was relentless – no matter how bad the situation was, he kept fighting.

Mayor, post-rescue with tears streaming down his face: “He never gave up.”

Gordon: “Who, Mayor? Who never gave up?”

Mayor: “The Batman… He doesn’t know what it means to surrender.”

But after he wakes up from his coma, Bruce is in despair. He has no hope left.

Bruce: “Doesn’t need to… Already beat me… It’s over… Gotham is his… ...The city is lost… ...Fallen to Bane…

-Alfred calls Bane’s defeat of Batman Bruce’s first real loss.

Alfred, to Tim: “It’s his first real failure, Timothy… Even when he… Lost Jason… It was out of his control… This is the first time he has faced another man squarely and lost.”

-How does Dr. Kinsolving not realize that Bruce’s injuries are three weeks old?

At least she calls bullshit on the cover story they feed her. The injuries don’t match a car crash.

-When Bane approaches Selina, she makes it clear that while she may work with him she will not work for him.

-It’s canon that Bruce uses a “hoarse, grating voice” for Batman.

-It’s also canon that the Drakes are next door to the Waynes.

At least that explains why Alfred was able to run to their house for help. (How large are their estates?).

-Unions, construction, and trucking are treated as criminal as drugs and bank burglary. Bane expects a cut from all of them.

Shadow of the Bat

-There’s an ad for a “harmless psychology experiment” at Gotham U.

The students should know better. There’s no such thing as a “harmless” experiment in Gotham.

There’s nothing harmless about psychology in Gotham at all.

-The bullying is rather silly. That’s what I’d expect of high schoolers, not college students.

-Jonathan started the experiment in his normal clothes and is in his Scarecrow outfit by the time the students are brainwashed.

Did he change his clothes in front of them?

I suppose they did have the VR headsets on…

-And yet another round of Batman creates his own villains, so he must be stopped for the city’s greater good.

But is this the writer using Anarky as their mouthpiece? Or is this core to Anarky’s character?

-Jonathan is so funny. Sure, he’s in the middle of making himself a god but he’ll detour to steal some books inherited by the son of his first victim. Why not?

-It’s ironic that Anarky decides Batman must be defeated after he already has been; the original Batman is out of the game – he’s been replaced by a new one.

Anarky’s also making the same mistake Bane made; it’s not enough to defeat the person that is Batman. He must destroy the mantle.

-Jean Paul just leaves people in a burning building after the fire trucks arrive to pursue Jonathan.

I don’t think Bruce would have done that.

A news report later states that people died in various fires over the night – it’s quite possible that if Jean Paul had stayed he could have some some of them.

-Jonathan is very offended by a news reporter calling him crazed and a maniac.

Jonathan, you’re wrecking havoc on the city in order to have it declare you the god of fear. I’m afraid the titles fit.

-Anarky’s priorities are… skewed. After capturing them both, he says Jonathan will go back to Arkham but Batman has to die.

So the man whose killed people all night gets to live, and the man who attempted to stop him has to die.

Yes, Anarky blames Batman for Scarecrow. However, Anarky also roped Batman in to help him stop criminals that outclassed Anarky’s abilities that night.

What’s his plan to stop other criminals out of his league if he kills Batman now?

-Jonathan orders Herold to jump off the roof to distract Batman so he can get away.

Instead, Jean Paul lets Herold jump. Fortunately, Anarky saves him.

Jean Paul’s priority is stopping criminals, not saving people.

This is further emphasized by threatening Anarky if he gets in Jean Paul’s way again, rather than thanking him.

Batman/Detective Comics

-Bane’s no more accustomed to failure than Bruce. He’s furious that “Batman” is still active after breaking Bruce’s back.

-Jim’s shocked when he turns around during a conversation with Batman and Batman is still there.

That’s when he first begins to suspect that “Batman” may be different than before.

-Bane and crew as a strange ‘50s family continues.

When his henchman return after breaking out of prison, Bane greets them in a dressing robe while holding a glass of wine.

-Bird, Zombie, and Trogg get thrashed for a third time by Batman.

For all they like to give themselves airs, they’re just henchman.

-From the height Jean Paul falls, water that shallow would NOT break his fall.

This is lampshaded in the comic itself, but still not explained.

-Jean Paul’s speech to Tim on why he operates so differently from Bruce is a summation of various critiques of why Batman needs to be a darker character.

Given the direction so far, I presume the rest of the Knightfall saga will be DC’s answer to why Bruce is how he is.

Jean Paul (excerpt from longer speech): ‘Forget the “Knight” and remember the “Dark”. If I’m going to make it – if I have a prayer – It’ll be because I’m darker than any darkness I face.’

-And then Jean Paul fires Tim (well, arguably after Tim already resigned) because Tim is too much of a bleeding heart.

-The mayor is now supportive of Batman. He still insists the cops follow the books, but he accepts there are times its necessary to disregard it. As a vigilante, Batman can do that; the cops can’t.

The timing is interesting – Bruce chose saving the mayor over capturing Jonathan and the Joker.

Bruce: “He’s right – I can’t do both, not in this condition… … Which leaves no choice at all. No way I let him kill another… I’ve got to save Krol.”

But Jean Paul is Batman now and he prioritizes stopping criminals over saving people. The incident with Herold in Shadow of the Bat makes that crystal clear; various incidents in the main continuity hint at that as well.

So the mayor gives the greenlight to a Batman that would have left him to die.

-Tim discusses his doubts about Jean Paul with Dick, and Dick settles on that if Bruce is confident in Jean Paul then that’s that.

For all Dick and Bruce butt heads, Dick has a lot of faith in Bruce.

Tim, however, is still skeptical.

-Jean Paul is not concerned about civilians at all in his rematch with Bane. If Tim hadn’t intervened, the train would almost certainly have derailed and people would have died.

Still, since Jean Paul spared Bane Tim decides Jean Paul is worthy of the mantle of Batman.

-Gordon is increasingly suspicious that Jean Paul isn’t the original Batman, but sparing Bane has him wavering on that suspicion.

Characters

Anarky

-Anarky’s a true wildcard. He’ll do whatever he considers best for the people, meaning he’ll work with someone one minute then against them the next if that’s what thinks to be in the people’s interest.

Anarky: “I’m against anything that’s against people! Cruelty – Brutality – Exploitation… These are the enemies of the people – the enemies of Anarky!”

-Anarky’s quite skilled. He can hack into police files, recognizes brain washing, and is able to snap people out of it.

He also finds Jonathan well before Jean Paul does.

-Under the influence of fear toxin, Anarky’s fear is the death of people and the planet.

Bane

-Bane may have physically escaped Peña Duro, but mentally he’s still there. He still has the mindset of a prisoner.

Bane: “I was damned to my role. I was condemned before my first cries of life. The world is my prison. I will rule it or die.”

Bruce Wayne

-Bruce is a shitty communicator.

He didn’t tell Barbara or Dick about his injury.

He didn’t tell Tim his father was kidnapped or that he and Alfred were leaving to save him. Tim had to find out from a note Alfred left.

Bruce’s usually has a good reason for his actions, but he’s terrible at expressing them.

Harvey Dent

-A subtle difference in Harvey and Two-Face’s speech is whether they use “boy” or “man” in a phrase they frequently repeat. Harvey uses boy, Two-Face uses man.

Two-Face: “A bad man does not do good things! A good man does not do bad things!”

-When Two-Face flips a coin, he says he’ll win regardless of what side comes up.

Nice touch – either Harvey gets what he wants or Two-Face does.

-Two-Face is extremely unstable throughout the showcase. He’s obviously unwell, albeit extremely dangerous. It’s obvious why he’s sent to Arkham instead of Blackgate.

Jean Paul

-Under the influence of fear toxin, Jean Paul’s fear is his lack of identity.

-Jean Paul says detective work bores him, but he’s more curious about Bane’s obsession with Batman than Bruce was.

This is another way he and Bruce differ – Jean Paul’s very interested in anything about himself, but Bruce is far more interested in anything about his city.

Jim Gordon

-Jim genuinely cares for Batman – after the fight with Bane he’s furious that the people who took him away weren’t from the hospital.

He only calms down when Bullock points out that it may have been Batman’s people that took him.

-To Jim, Batman is hope. If Batman is gone so is the city’s future.

Jim waiting by the Batman skylight: “Just a word. Just a sign. That’s all I ask. Anything to let me know that Gotham is still a city with hope.”

Jonathan Crane

-Jonathan genuinely wanted the money for ransoming he mayor… So could continue his experiments.

Whelp. At least he’s consistent.

-Jonathan is surprisingly good with tech. He used VR to brainwash his test subjects, then booby-trapped a tape.

-Jonathan’s two true loves are fear and books.

Jonathan: “I only ever had two loves in my life – fear, of course, and books!”

-Jonathan becoming the Scarecrow is him reclaiming an insult used against him.

His colleagues called him one because he was so thin (since he spent all of his money on books). So Jonathan embraces it.

Jonathan: “I look like a Scarecrow – so that will by my symbol! A symbol of poverty and fear combined – the Scarecrow!”

-Scarecrow’s origin story: A poor university professor that hired himself out as an enforcer to afford more books, killed a man after one warning, and realized he loved it.

Thus a nightmare was born.

-Respect is very important to Jonathan. He’s angry at Gotham University for rejecting him, angry at his fellow professors for not respecting him, and furious when a news reporter treats Scarecrow as a lunatic.

Tim Drake

-Tim’s having a rough time. First his father is paralyzed, now his surrogate father figure is also paralyzed.

-Tim’s upset Jean Paul’s rejected him as a partner, but reassures himself that only Bruce can take Robin away from him.

[allthishumanityforfree]

I'm the tangfastics at stage door lady (50 years old) and Paul Mescal is the first crush that I've had of this size on a celebrity since Cary Elwes in The Princess Bride. I've been examining it big time... Some of it is impulse control, diagnosed with ADHD and perimenopause and went through some trouble at work which evidently can lead to crushes as a way to deal with things. Happily married. But way way way way addicted and wasting way too much time on following him on social media. I was trying to cut down and found this account just googling his name because I had taken Instagram off of my phone. First saw him a year ago on Hulu and all of the strangers and thought he was Pedro Pascal for the first few minutes, then looked him up and started watching normal people which I had started before not realizing it and liked it more the second time. I think it might be just those two movies in a row that really created the attraction. I didn't even know what shipped meant until I got on Instagram just for paul. I totally had shipped him and Andrew quite some time so you properly identified me as a mescott but then I equally shipped him in Daisy just as hard. I have had some jealousy issues about Gracie, but he just wore another one of her sweatshirts last night at stage door. I do think the relationship is real. It will be interesting to see how his career grows and who end up being his long-term partner. I think his natural reaction to being given the Tangfastics was pure joy and he brought up vanya, so I don't think there's any awkward breakups I have a feeling they're just trying to keep their private lives private. Paul would hate all of these conversations we're having about his private life. But my self-control is seriously lacking these days! Curious how you became such a shipper and is it in jest or are you full on tinhat.

Hello. I hope you don't mind me posting this ask. Thank you for giving him those sweets, you certainly were a talk of the fandom and gave us all a little Mescott hope. I am so so relieved that he seemed happy and there was no awkwardness, although you have to admit that the lack of public appearances, even at professional events, is unusual. No reason Paul and Andrew can't attend opening events and promote each other's stuff.

Can you tell us what he said about vanya and more about meeting him?

I worrying am quite a tinhatter, I believe everything I write on here. I mean, I am not in peoples dms and like this in real life. This Tumblr is the only place I talk about Mescott, and I chose it because it's quiet and hidden. I would hate for people involved to read these thoughts, which is why I do not have a Twitter, TikTok or Instagram about Mescott. It's just here and the Discord, where I feel I can get feral, and no one will notice. Of course, I am aware that it's not totally hidden and people can still find me. (I am shocked I have this many followers).

But 80% of my thoughts when they drift are about Mescott. And yes, I do think they had a thing going on during the AOUS promo. I have always thought Paul was queer. I liked him as an actor since Aftersun, well actually I saw Carmen when it came out and thought he had huge potential as an actor. I just presumed he was queer, like a straight guy would not be engaged to Phoebe Bridgers.

How did I become a shipper? I watched Mescott on Graham Norton promoting AOUS and perceived. My TikTok fyp is generally celeb interviews and press tours, so I started seeing those purple cardigan/blue shirt interviews. I became low-key obsessed with were fucking. I perceive a lot about celebs hooking up (I could list a few I think have theories about) but thanks to some good gifmakers I really got into Mescott. For whatever reason, it itched my RPF brain. I just loved how happy and comfortable Paul was with Andrew compared to older interviews, I guess.

I also am not sold on P&G being real, but I am worried if I say some theories I could tempt fate.

[lithub]

May 7, 2025

On Lit Hub dot com:

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Padraic X. Scanlan on Jonathan Swift, dispossession, and how British imperialism caused famine in Ireland. | Lit Hub History

“An exile of its first garden, the orange moves where the world takes it, always a stranger who must assimilate to a new home.” Katie Goh meditates on the personal mythology of an iconic citrus fruit. | Lit Hub Nature

Rosa Castellano on decentering whiteness in literary spaces: “It is the discomfort of asking and of making space for the answers…that will allow us to stay in the room together.” | Lit Hub Criticism

Randee Dawn explores the allure (and dilemma) of trunk literature: “Here’s the truth: Most authors do not publish their first novel.” | Lit Hub Craft

What’s a psoas? Henry Abbott wants you to know that it’s one of the most important muscles in your body. | Lit Hub Health

Philip Hoare on Paul Nash, W. Graham Robertson, and how William Blake influenced Oscar Wilde’s circle. | Lit Hub Criticism

“Arin was somewhere in Germany when my mother got sick again.” Read from Jemimah Wei’s new novel, The Original Daughter. | Lit Hub Fiction

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Hari Kunzru on wellness grifters, New Age conspiracies, and “do your own research” in times of fascism. | New York Review of Books

The anonymous user behind @poetryisnotaluxry on Instagram discusses poetry as an outlet for privacy, editing an anthology, and the Audre Lorde essay that inspired their handle. | The Nation

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[panelshowsource]

HEY NOW...

aw thanks anon!! i did post my gif resources a while ago but i can post an updated one of these soon and include some psds! my gifs really aren't that good tho anon — if i'm being honest, i don't really spend that much time on colouring like i could — so if you can find someone PROPERLY good (usually a film/tv blog, as you can imagine) they may have really expert tips 🤔

as someone who has been at the ugliest end of reddit & discord tv/britcom fans' trolldom (too nice a word, really), and lived through the fucking unending years-long era of that one incel's rule over the panel show subreddit, i understand the reticence to participate in those spaces — even though, these days, they're mostly pleasant enough and subs that supply downloads (tv_bunny is life) are more or less transactional. that said, the purpose of this blog has always been to service the people who can't or don't torrent — who a lot of reddit & discord tv/britcom fans don't have the patience for, but i digress — so it doesn't bother me that a lot of my followers don't know reddit as well as i do. no worries!

omg! recently i watched after life (i love kerry godliman!!!!!!!), dara ó briain's new special, and i've also been doing my biannual re-listen of the entire horne section podcast because it is so fucking impeccable chef's kiss! i was catching up on guessable but it's really, deeply, truly mid, so i kinda gave up for a while and switched over to breeders (martin freeman agenda continues). otherwise non-panel show things, some films like close, return to dust, un beau matin, etc. — but that's for my main hehe i'm someone who wishes i could watch 10000 things in one day T_T

hahaha i do get asked this a lot!!! like you there's just so. many. and i often chicken out of substantially answering this because if i forget anyone i'll kick myself SO hard later

but

back in the day i answered a similar question about some non-comedians i want to see on taskmaster AND I SAID AMELIA DIMOLDENBERG AND IT CAME TRUE

LIKE

MY BRAIN 🧠🧠🧠🧠🧠🧠

SO MAYBE I CAN MANIFEST THINGS LET'S TRY 🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮

this is personal to me, of course, and i'm considering people i really love + who i think would be really fun specifically on taskmaster, so in a somewhat priority order...

robert webb

stephen mangan

robert irwin

catherine tate

jessica hynes

miles jupp

simon amstell (preferably on the same season as jessica hynes because about 15 years ago (literally) i used to watch this clip religiously, and i'm sure that has something very specific to say about why i am the way i am but we don't have time to psychoanalyse me rn)

larry dean

ed byrne

holly walsh

diane morgan

daniel radcliffe

charlie brooker

hugh laurie

susie dent (omg i was CACKLING at susie, who is never on panel shows(!!!), being on the same episode of guessable as nick helm — and now i kinda wanna see her on the same series of tm as nick helm muhahaha)

kayvan novak

limmy

paul foot

bill bailey

lawrence chaney (i also love the vivienne of course! but i think lawrence may be more fit for tm while the vivenne is more fit for something like celeb juice; btw just watched her on guessable with ivo graham, and ivo calling her "viv"...omg...it did something to me...it really did...again, we're not talking about why i am the way i am)

vic reeves

the sexted boys

some other randoms people i'd certainly be happy to see, even if they don't make the priority manifesting roster — ahir shah, adam buxton, danny dyer, jimmy carr, graham norton, matt berry, glenn moore, maggie aderin-pocock, gary delaney, hal cruttenden, rhys james, huge davies, josie long, alasdair beckett-king, gino d'acampo, julian barrett, and tonsss of actors but we'd be here all day

i don't think there are many people i vehemently do not want to see on the show. while there are of course a few comedians i just don't like, and if taskmaster puts another tory politician on the panel again i'll fucking write in with my upset, the disappointment i typically feel if and when i see a new lineup is more along the lines of "meh they're fine but they took the place of someone i'd much rather see". but tm is also so good at introducing us to people we may not have seen much of before — and then we love them, so i trust the producers and alex a lot!

🔮 MANIFESTING MANIFESTING MANIFESTING MANIFESTING MANIFESTING MANIFESTING MANIFESTING 🔮

—

WATCH LINKS MASTERPOST / FAQ / TAGS / ASK

[modernmanblues]

Hi dear,

I'm so happy to have a beta reader for my recently "risen from the ashes" 10cc/Eric Stewart fic! Here's the plan: since it's in Portuguese, give me a few days to translate it (I'll use Word's automatic translation combined with some ChatGPT tweaks to minimize errors and expressions that wouldn’t make sense in English). I'll also include some scenes where I have the structure but have been struggling with writer’s block. Who knows—you might be able to help me with those parts?

I can also help you with some things regarding your fic about the lovely Leah Walker and her love, Eric :) I read the special appearance of the McCartney couple in your fic, and I found it really nice and cute. I'm also very curious to see the cameos of all those amazing people you mentioned.

Eric’s near-death scene gave me quite a scare (I would never have the courage to write something like that in my fic, hahaha—my style is much lighter), but I was glad that Leah saved him and that this might mean something concrete for the future of their relationship. I can’t wait for the rest!

About 10cc: no doubt, the post-1977 lineup featuring Rick Fenn, Paul Burgess, and the other brilliant musicians was very competent and had some great moments with Eric and Graham. I’d say the peak was that 1982 Wembley show—Feel the Benefit rendition made me gobsmacked! But I’m a lost cause because I’m absolutely in love with the first four albums—from 10cc to How Dare You (my favorite, because of the wonderful Lazy Days and the masterpiece Don’t Hang Up), with an honorable mention to Deceptive Bends. What an incredible body of work. I dare say they were the band that came closest to the brilliance of The Beatles.

Oh, one more thing—I saw that you wrote another fanfic featuring Chicago. You won’t believe it, but a very important scene in my fic has Happy Man, that wonderful song of theirs, as a key element. Tell me about coincidences!

Hi hi hi!

I am so excited to read your work! Also I do apologise for the late reply, I’ve been tied up with work, etc. ANYWAY-

I would be more than happy to give you feedback on your piece! Also, it would mean a lot to me if you gave me your two cents on my work (i’m always open to this). After all, any brilliant piece of literature wouldn’t be as meaningful without the input of both the author and editor.

Like Eric, I have the tendency to have a dark sense of humour at times so that’s why I nearly made him die in Chapter 6 of Chances (sorry Eric, please forgive me waahhh), but the fact that Leah came and revived him with “the kiss of life” has (potentially) changed the overall dynamic between the two. There is, however, still some uncertainty in how the two really feel about each other. Only time will tell I suppose.

Speaking of Feel The Benefit, it is actually my favourite 10cc song! I relate to it so much. And the way the entire song is delivered- from start to finish- an absolute class. I have no words for it, really.

The second 10cc lineup is also a class act. Rick Fenn, especially. He’s a brilliant guitarist and complemented Eric so well in those days.

And like you, I have nothing but love for the first four 10cc album. There is absolutely nothing like them. Not even The Beatles could’ve made anything like that, frankly speaking.

Haha, about my Chicago fic- I gave on it actually because I had gone through a phase where I wanted to do a mashup of Chicago (the band) and a sitcom from the 70s called WKRP in Cincinnati (because I had a massive crush on actor Gary Sandy who was one of the leading acts in that show, but anyway I digress). I do find it a funny coincidence that you used a Chicago song as a working title for one of your chapters.

[douchebagbrainwaves]

WHAT NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ABOUT CHRONICLE

At each step, flow down. Airbnb is a classic example of the use of these special, reserved field names, especially __call__, seems a bit eccentric to take earplugs on a trip to an island off the coast of Maine.1 As usual, by Demo Day about half the startups we fund never make decks in phase 2. I say this as a founder that helped me understand something important: why it's safe for startup founders of all ages to build things people want. If an organization could immediately and cheaply measure the performance of the others.2 No one, VC or angel, has invested in more of the political pressure against Airbnb than hotel companies. Their search also turned up parse. The plan was to write a Lisp interpreter in the less powerful language?3

Investors are fine with funding nerds. They could make it.4 But I think angel rounds will less often be for specific amounts or have a lead. Put the most weight on the second factor.5 And get good, and artists being good at making things that they do is to sacrifice unpromising startups. He showed how, given a handful of American computer science professors which universities in Europe were most admired, and they all tell the same story to several different publications at once. The closest is the colloquial sense of addictive. Gif Comment on this essay. I found my doodles changed after I started studying painting. But it also explains why the ups and downs are surprisingly extreme.6

Patent law in most countries says that algorithms aren't patentable.7 The most successful founders are almost all good. What about iTunes?8 They call the things that put them over the edge. But if we get good enough at obscuring tokens for this to be benevolent, but it is telling how well this image has stuck.9 The best I get is he means well. We advise founders who go on to create giant companies not seem formidable early on? If you watch little kids playing sports, you notice this pattern if you are Thanks fred to: Fred Wilson to: Paul Graham date: Fri, Jan 23,2009 at 11:40 AM subject: Re: Revenge of the Nerds. To an amoral person it might seem a stupid thing to ask. I wanted to keep one foot in publishing. But because the lies are indirect we don't keep a very strict accounting of them. Not much, I should add that vesting is also a way for founders to have people to ask themselves about this explicitly.

Small for reading drafts of this paper; to Dan Bricklin and Bob Frankston. Because they're so bad, the kids adopt an attitude of waiting for college. I've watched the evolution of programming languages: to describe each in terms of reducing inequality. No matter how much you want to notice quickly that it already is winning. That's what the title corp dev means. You often hear people say that you have to give some of the ways cities send you messages are quite subtle.10 Not surprisingly, these are neither my spam nor my nonspam mail.11 It's absolute poverty you want to design new programming languages. Developing new technology is usually more engaging than one that plodded dutifully along a prescribed course. You may be able to say who cares what investors think? This group says one thing.12 When a large tract has been developed by outsiders.13

There's a scene in Being John Malkovich where the nerdy hero encounters a very attractive, sophisticated woman.14 If you want to define a good programming language? By all means crack down on these. One of the most valuable things I learned from Villehardouin's chronicle is not what I remember about the Airbnbs during YC, I picture them with rolly bags, because when you're not already good at seeming formidable is that they are downwind.15 This was the most powerful language, b write a de facto Ponzi scheme.16 Ronco became so powerful.17 User in Mind You can't build things users like without understanding them. They'd been thrown off balance from the start by their fear of Microsoft.

Suppose you wanted to get lots of referrals is to invest in us if we had operated under the assumption that everyone will drive flying cars, that zoning laws will be relaxed to allow buildings hundreds of stories tall, that it will set impossibly high expectations. A page of formulas just looks so impressive. I recommend being good. What kids get taught in school is to be only two and they rarely competed with one another.18 That certainly accords with what I see out in the world, write a new Mosaic. It seems surprising to me that any employer would be reluctant to express in front of a TV all day—days at the end. Most of us have suspected. In a desktop software company, this would give us. Their stock price has been flat for years. For example, if you have eager first investors is raise money from VCs, and a small but devoted following.19 You could have some other advantage like extraordinary growth numbers or exceptionally formidable founders.20

Notes

See, we try to establish a protocol for web-based applications greatly to be low.

I'm not saying that if the current edition, which wouldn't even cover the extra cost. And you should push back on the order and referrer. Quite often at YC.

There are two very different types of people, but for blacklists nearness is physical, and one or two, because for times over a series.

There are successful women who don't like.

1% a week for 19 years, but he refused because a unless your last round of funding rounds are at selling it to get market price for you by accidents of age and geography, rather than given by other Lisp dialects: Here's an example of a problem later. Delicious, but in practice investors discount merely predicted revenue, so I called to check and in b the second type to go away.

If a company tried to unload it on buyer after buyer. A Timex will gain or lose about. And I'm sure for every startup we funded, summer 2010.

They'll tell you all the mistakes you made.

I'm not going to give up your anti-immigration people to bust their asses.

Thanks to judgmentalist for this type: lies told by older siblings. One thing that would appeal to investors. For similar reasons, including principal and venture partner.

Several people have historically been so many people mistakenly think it was outlawed in the less educated ones usually reply with some axe the audience at an academic talk might appreciate a joke, they might have 20 affinities by this standard, and indeed the venture business.

Needless to say hello on her way out. I swapped them to make the right to buy corporate bonds to market faster; the idea of starting a company with rapid, genuine growth is genuine. If you can base brand on anything with it, because unpromising-seeming startups encounter mediocre investors.

Some translators use calm instead of uebfgbsb. For a long time?

Everyone's taught about it wrong. Different kinds of companies used consulting to generate revenues they could attribute to malice what can be useful here, since they're an existing investor, than a nerdy founder trying to make more money. Plus one can ever say it again.

92.

You could also degenerate from uppercase to any-case, as in e.

So much better to live in a company he really liked, but to fail to mention a few people plot their own page.

So it is the only companies smart enough to absorb that.

In a project like a winner, they cancel out and you might be a big change in response to what modernist architects meant. It would not be led by manipulation or wishful thinking into trying to hide wealth from the 1940s or 50s instead of editors, and partly because they can't teach them how to be a good way to make software incompatible.

The problem is the bellwether. Though we're happy to provide this service, this thought experiment: suppose prep schools supplied the same motives.

When the same in the press or a 2004 Mercedes S600 sedan 122,000, the mean annual wage in the grave and trying to enter the software business, which is the kind of method acting. If they no longer a precondition.

Thanks to Harj Taggar, David Cann, Lisa Randall, Jessica Livingston, Nick Tomarello, Robert Morris, Paul Buchheit, and Geoff Ralston for inviting me to speak.

[bisluthq]

I wasn’t a fan of Saoirse’s performance in Blitz tbh. The accent felt forced and she didn’t feel like a mom. I don’t think it’s to do with her age because Lauren Graham did very much give young mom vibes in Gilmore Girls when she was around the same age and with a much older kid. Saoirse just didn’t seem motherly enough to me.

I think the movie would’ve been better if it was a love actually type of thing where you follow multiple people who are all connected in some way. I think it would’ve worked better to show what he wanted to show. For example, I know a few scenes where based on real events and he had to shoehorn George in to be able to put them in the film. If he had focused on a bigger cast, he could’ve had those scenes playing out with different people.

I think the worst part is that it didn’t make me care about any of the characters. I think there are films where the characters aren’t as important as the plot or the experience, but here you’re clearly meant to care and I just didn’t.

Wait I think I actually figured out the problem. Nothing really happens to either of them, and the few things that happen to George are barely related to the Blitz most of the time. So what we got to see of the Blitz was them observing other people going through things, people we don’t know. While the main characters are just walking around not doing much. It’s like he decided to make a movie about the Blitz and focus on the least interesting story.

I loved the set design, the hair, the make up and the wardrobe. But I thought the cgi wasn’t great, I wasn’t wowed by any performance, Harris and Paul Weller were underused and underdeveloped. Honestly, Saoirse and Elliott were kind of underused and underdeveloped too. Saoirse is literally just “sad mom” because it’s not like she does that much to look for him, and she didn’t even give “mom” so she was just sad. But the sad was mostly a in shock type of sad so she was just 😐 for most of it. She looked pretty, she has a beautiful singing voice and I loved the dancing that she did in one scene. But most of it was underwhelming to say the least. I don’t think it’s her fault though, her character isn’t well written and I think she was miscast.

Elliott was good but I wasn’t wowed by him either. When I watched the Mathilda musical on Netflix, I didn’t love the movie but I thought all the kids were extremely talented (which meant I was happy to see one of them show up for a bit in Blitz). But I didn’t necessarily feel that way about Elliott, it’s not a performance I will think about ever.

Last but not least, the cartoon villains took me out of the film completely. I don’t know who thought that was a good idea but it was SO bad. I think going back to one of my earlier points, it would’ve been cool to focus on some criminals and the reasons why they’re doing what they’re doing. There’s a character called that is in a couple of scenes and works with the criminals but who seems to be a better person and conflicted about what they’re doing, I think that would’ve been a more interesting character to explore. Instead we’re left with Stephen Graham and Kathy Burke playing caricature villains from a dark children’s book.

I also felt like the race commentary was undercooked. I think he did a lot of research about this and then he wanted to fit all of it in a film to the point where he didn’t achieve any of it in the end,

This is a mess because I was actually coming here to share the first paragraph and then I kept complaining about things, but if Steve McQueen can write and direct and release a messy film, I should be allowed to send a messy message on tumblr.com

sorry I answered these out of sequence but yes why are these movies consistently so disappointing???

[netfleecking]

july watches 🎬

1. descendants: rise of red

2/10.

very poor storytelling abilities created this story.

i love musicals, but the characters actually broke off into song for absolutely no reason throughout the film (e.g. rapping dialogue that could just have been dialogue)

they spent half the movie on intro, and then kind of forgot they had to write a good climax or conclusion

hated their decisions with how to use their cast (which i thought wasnt bad). why uliana and not ursurla? since when was morgana a popular disney villain? why did hook and morganas kid have no personality? why is chloe so boring?

2. taskmaster: series 4, series 8, series 9, CoC 1, CoC 3, series 15

• series 9: 10/10. very strong cast. almost everyone filled a specific niche of comedy that was thoroughly entertaining and enjoyable. the cast also played off each other very well. ed gamble, in particular, is an absolute riot.

• series 4: 9/10. genuinely the most wholesome cast. they werent the wildest or most competitive, but their vibe was so pure and sweet its wholesome to watch. mel and hugh are huge softies. noel and joe are the chaotic cousins, and lolli the youngest.

• series 15: 7/10. i didnt expect to like series 15 as much as i did. casting was okay, though not particularly interesting. a stand-out cast member is ivo graham who had me laughing until my sides hurt. not a particularly memorable series, but not bad

• series 8: 5/10. ambivalent series for me, because i loved joe thomas' odd personality, but lou sanders and iian sterling made it unbearable sometimes. lou was genuinely annoying, and i had to skip through MANY scenes of her whining and being bratty. ian was wayy too competitive and aggressive. but at least he toned it down after seeing himself be that way on the big screen.

3. taskmaster NZ: series 2

• 10/10. i never wanted to watch any taskmaster spin offs after watching taskmaster US a few years back, but series 2 of TM-NZ might rank as one of the best series ever, even when up against TM-UK

• the cast and chemistry was excellent. they also had many memorable taskd like "find alex", the never-ending "float a brussel sprout" and "milk jugs on the microwave". i cant go a day without thinking about guy's greenscreen date with paul.

• i applaud the casting of jeremy and paul, too. for they were able to set the tone true to the original TM, while not exactly copying greg and alex. paul is a lot more quippy and sarcastic, and jeremy more deadpan. but all enjoyable, nonetheless

[thegenderfucker]

thank you for sharing this!!

text transcription (all typos and misreadings are mine):

cover:

Bad Sisters

Will their secrets be uncovered as the series returns?

double spread:

BAD ROMANCE

Will the Garveys' deadly secret be discovered as Grace ties the knot?

New comedy drama: Bad Sisters. From Wednesday 13 November, Apple TV+ (two episodes on We 13 Nov, then released weekly)

Having already given us TV hits Catastrophe and Motherlandn writer, director and actor Sharon Horgan scored a hat-trick in 2022 with Bad Sisters. Tackling the sensitive topic of domestic abuse with sincerity and a generous dose of Irish humour, the comedy drama was lapped up by viewers and critics alike, winning a clutch of awards including BAFTAs for Best Drama and Best Supporting Actress for Anne-Marie Duff. So it's no wonder that Horgan felt pressure when writing and filming Season 2, which lands on Apple TV+ this week. "It's amazing to know Bad Sisters was well-received, but putting out Season 2 is nerve-racking because people related to the sisters so well and you want them to connect with it in the same way," says Horgan, who plays eldest sister Eva Garvey, alongside Duff as abused widow Grace, Eva Birthistle as Ursula, Sarah Greene as Bibi, and Eve Hewson as Becka. The drama picks up two years on from the "accidental death" of Grace's abusive husband, John Paul, aka JP, after it was revealed in the finale that she'd actually strangled him to death with his pyjama top. We now find Grace getting married to new man Ian (Killing Eve's Owen McDonnell), but when the sisters are rocked by a sudden devastating tragedy, their bond is tested like never before. In an exclusive interview with TV&Satellite Week, Horgan, 54, tells us more?

What were the challenges of writing Season 2 of Bad Sisters?

Apart from Season 1's JP storyline and having this central, villainous character that everyone loved to hate, I know viewers really enjoyed being around this infectious group of women who are so full of passion and anger. So it was about keeping the sisters at the heart of a drama. I'd found with Catastrophe and Motherland that if you have great first season, doing it all again just feels weird. But once we'd decided on the storyline, all the sisters' voices came back naturally. I stopped worrying so much and that difficult "second album" started flowing.

Where do we find the Garvey sisters as the new episodes begin?

It's two years on, all the sisters have all moved on in their lives, and Grace is marrying a seemingly great man, Ian. But she's fragile. She's still living with the guilt of what she did and the impact it has on her conscience. Meanwhile Grace's new neighbor Roger [Michael Smiley] is wavering in his conviction about having helped Grace move JP's body. At the wedding, Roger's sister, Angelica [Fiona Shaw, see panel, right], sees the pair talking, and senses something's up. Things then start to fall apart quite quickly....

Is Angelica the common enemy uniting the sisters in Season 2?

Having JP as a villain in Season 1 was a big set of shoes to fill, so we knew we had to fill them in different ways. The police play an important role this time. When a discovery is made, season detective DI Fergal Loftus [Barry Ward] and his rookie partner, Una Houlihan [Thaddea Graham] are brilliant as foils for the sisters, alongside Angelica. And there's a bigger enemy that emerges over time.

What does Fiona Shaw bring to the role of Angelica?

Fiona was in our heads from the start. I wrote the part for her and she's perfect as Angelica. We needed someone who could watch these sisters and have a constant, internal battle with herself as to why they seem so free and able to live a life she's never been able to have. Angelica is very moral but also hypocritical - she likes messing with the sisters and sticking the knife in.

How was it working in your native Ireland?

Filming Grace's wedding in Ireland, the weather went from boiling hot to full-blown monsoon, so we were disappointed when we turned up in all our wedding finery and there's mud everywhere and it's pouring with rain. Our director, Dearbhla Wlash, gave this beautiful speech about how we were all together in this beautiful setting making a show we all love. So she buoyed us all while we're being whipped around by wind and rain!

Blurbs for the sisters:

Bibi (Sarah Greene) Outpsoken Bibi and wife Nora are undergoing IVF treatment in the hope of having second child. Will it be all happy families?

Eva (Sharon Horgan) Always looking out for her sisters, Eva's abotu to experience a new wave of feelings and emotions as she enters the menopause...

Grace (Anne-Marie Duff) Life's seemingly looking up for Grace as she gets hitched to Ian. But will she truly be able to put her traumatic past behind her?

Ursula (Eva Birthistle) On the surface, Ursula appears to be coping, but behing closed doors she's struggling and self-medicating. Will a tragedy tip her over the edge?

Becka (Eve Hewson) The youngest Garvey sister is loved-up with new boyfriend, Ben. But when ex Matt recalls the big secret he kept, will they reunite?

SUSPICIOUS MIND With screen credits that include Petunia Dursley in the Harry Potter films and spymaster Carolyn Martens in BBC1's Killing Eve, Fiona Shaw couldn't wait to add Bad Sisters to her already impressive CV when she joins the cast this week as the suspicious Angelica. "There's a lot less very good writing around, so it's such a relief when you read something from one of the brightest sparks in the industry, which Sharon Horgan is," enthuses Shaw, 66. "I loved Season 1 and this follow-up is almost more brave and more dangerous. Angelica is a nice person who has unfortunate character traits," she adds. "Angelica's annoying because she's lonely and wants to be friends with Grace and join the sisters' gang. The gap between Angelica's version of reality and actual real life is where comedy lies."

TV & Satellite's Article on Bad Sisters: Series 2

(I apologise for my carpet, the appalling lightning & for not scanning this in, I do not know how)

[thestarsarecool]

Paul McCartney Interview in Q Magazine: Cash for Questions. January 1998 Issue.

Hi, all! A photo of one page of this has been around on tumblr for a while (here), but I’ve always wanted to read the full thing. Some lovely soul on Google Groups in 1997 decided to transcribe the full interview (here), so now I’m uploading it so you can read it. Hooray!

Q. When you first wrote a song with John Lennon, did you realise you would play one of the biggest parts in rock 'n' roll? (Michael McConnell, Crawley, West Sussex)

A. Obviously not. But even with all the so-called "historical" events that followed, you're just too inside it all, too busy doing it to realise anything's "historical". You just get on with it. I'm not a great ponderer. Some people would say that's a mistake but it's just the way I am. It's quite cool not to always get the overall picture because it leaves something to be found out. The musicologists get paid to discover the differences between me and John. I'm only just beginning to see it now, based probably on their analysis. So John is often one note, I'm often more melodic. (McCartney is thinking especially of Ian McDonald's book Revolution in the Head, where he describes the ace partnership in contrasts: Lennon's method is "harmonic, dissonant", McCartney's that of the "natural melodist".) It might sound amazing but we never spotted that when we were writing. We just did our thing. But it is kind of apparent when you bother to analyse it.

Q. If John Lennon could come back for a day, how would you spend it with him (Mark Wilson, Deeside, Flintshire)

A. In bed.

Q. Were you ever envious that Brian Epstein didn't fancy you? (Nick Gibson, London) 

A. No, I didn't mind. We just used to go to these clubs at night and wonder why there were so many men. It was OK. Brian was very cool about his side to things. I think the nearest any of us got to it was the John-going-to-Spain thing (it inspired the movie, The Hours And The Times) and I'm not sure what the strength of all that was. I think it was power play on John's part. But Brian kept his private life aside. He kept it out of our faces (pause, possibly for effect). He kept it out of mine, anyway.

Q. What were the last records you bought? (Chris Timms, Harrogate)

A. The Prodigy's The Fat Of The Land, Radiohead's OK Computer and Chopin's Nocturnes.

Q. How do you feel about all the animosity between you and Oasis right now? (Christina Vellano, Syracuse, New York, USA)

A. There is none as far as I'm concerned. What happened was I'd said, Good group, good singer, good songwriters. But people asked me about it so much that one time I decided to take it further and say that they don't mean anything to me. I am not related to Oasis. I wish them good luck and everything. But my kids mean something to me, John Lennon means something to me, but Oasis ....

Q. Who would you pick to play with in your dream six-piece band? (Alan Thatcher, Essex) 

A. Dream? So we're into fantasy, aren't we? Ringo, John, George, that's three. Me. Jimi Hendrix. That makes lots of guitarists, so Little Richard on keyboards.

Q. With Wings, did you feel pressurised to live up to The Beatles? (Andrew Williams, Neath)

A. Yes, it was a case of "follow that!". Impossible to do. Looking back on it, it's a lot better than I thought, though some of it is just not PLAYED as well as The Beatles. My son (James, co-worker on McCartney's last pop album, Flaming Pie) plays a lot of Wings, so I'm re-listening, and there's good shit that I'd forgotten about. A lot of the lyrics were off the wall, drug stimulated. Things like "Soily - the cat in the satin trousers says its oily". What was I on? I think the answer is stimulants.

Q. Do you still support the legislation of cannabis? (Grahame Woods, Northwood, Middlesex)

A. I would make a distinction between legalising and decriminalising. I'm in favour of the latter. The problem is that jails are stuffed full of kids doing what a lot of people do. Why stuff the jails with young kids? Plus it's one of the best places to score. I remember when I got busted in Japan, nobody made the slightest effort to rehabilitate me (laughs). Just stuck me in a box for nine days. Obviously you come out and you are fairly resentful.

Q. Do you roll a wicked joint? (Steve Kline, Bury)

A. I have nothing to say in answer to that question, m'lud. I wasn't even at the venue.

Q. The critics have been harsh on your solo work. Did this ever discourage you? (Robert Hemauer, Madison, Wisconsin, USA)

A. Yeah, sure, but you don't let it kill you. It's a difficult one, because it's never cool for someone to tell you you're shit. Many people through history were damned by the critics of their own time - Cezanne, Van Gogh, Stravinsky, all great painters! Ha ha!

Q. We'd like to see your paintings but can't get to the exhibition in Germany (McCartney unveils his work for the first time in Siegen, Germany, next year). Any thoughts about putting your paintings on "tour", or publishing a book of them? (Kathy Goodman, San Diego, CA, USA)

A. A difficult one. If you're a so-called celebrity - like Bowie, Anthony Quinn, Tony Curtis - and you exhibit any art, inevitably, people are not going to think of you as a real painter. Gallery owners come up to me and offer to give me exhibitions. I say, You haven't seen my pictures, and they say, It doesn't matter. Well, it does to me. Otherwise, it's just trading on the name. However, this guy from Germany came over, looked at all my paintings, seems to like them. He's telling me what they're all about.

Q. You've done so many things - classical, films, music, art, drugs - is there anything left you might have a go at? (Tim Bowler, Swansea)

A. The thing is how reluctant I've often been to have a go. I think we were brought up pretty repressed. Brought up to be seen and not heard, to stay in your place, particularly a working class thing. And I think - I hope - with The Beatles, we got rid of a lot of that. With the painting, for instance, it was Willem de Kooning who liberated me. I used to go to his studio, took in one of my paintings, said, Hey Bill, I hope you don't mind but can you tell me what it is? (Affects American drawl) "Oh, looks like a couch." Well it looked like a purple mountain to me. And he says, "Well, whatever." Here's one of the greats, his works go for one million, and it was great to see how little bullshit he was bringing to it all. It's really important to explode these myths that surround the arts, music, painting. It's Wizard of Oz time - so many myths, and it's often just a little man behind the screen. The paraphernalia that surrounds them gets in the way. Often you meet leaders in their field and they have none of that. I remember asking a great painter - Peter Blake, maybe - for some advice once, and he said "Just paint a lot". Similar to my approach to music.

Q. How do you know when a song's finished? (Joyce Slavik, Palatine, Illinois)

A. It's full up. You've answered all of your questions. Normally, I start following a thread: "Eleanor Rigby picks up the rice ... " The thread might come out of nowhere, and I follow it and complete it, like a crossword puzzle. When the crossword is full up, the song is finished.

Q. What's more embarrassing: writing Hi Hi Hi or Say Say Say? (Tien Vu, Costa Mesa, California)

A. (Weighs up pros and cons). Say Say Say.

Q. Why did you give such extensive interviews for an authorised biography (Paul McCartney: Many Years From Now) instead of writing an autobiography? (Deena Hochberg, Southampton, Pennsylvania)

A. I don't think I'm a writer. I've never been moved to do it. You have to have a pretty big fire in the belly to do something as big as that. I fancy music more. I'm happier writing in songs rather than in prose, or poetry. Though I wrote something that was never published about the time I got busted in Japan - for my kids. Because I knew one day they'd say, "Hey dad, what was it like, nine days in a Tokyo jail?". So I had a mate of mind, who did all our printing, knock up a few copies, one for each of the kids.

Q. I'd like to know if Sir Paul sings in the shower, and if so, what does he sing? (Jennifer Nash, Bursville, Minnesota)

A. It's normally the bath. I prefer a good bath. And the answer's Firestarter - "I'm a firestarter, de-de-de-de-dera."

Q. As a kid you used to play pranks at school by throwing balloons filled with something "worse than water". If you had one of those balloons right now who would you like to hit with it? (Brett Yuskiewicz, Leipzig, Germany)

A. Jonathan King. He's a prat from way back.

Q. Which football team did/does each Beatle support? (WC Chan, Maryland, USA)

A. None of us were big footie types. We weren't very sporty, unlike other groups who were always having knock-arounds. My dad was an Everton fan, which I was most of my life. But then Liverpool started playing well, and Everton didn't, so I took the unprecedented move of supporting them both. It's not allowed, I know, but there you go.

Q. For years, you've claimed it's you in the Walrus costume in the Magical Mystery Tour film. But watching the footage shows that for it to be you, you and John would have had to exchange all your clothes. Are you winding us up, or have you not watched the film in 30 years? (Dorothy Northcutt, Tucker, Georgia) 

A. The big one. Very good question. I tell you what it was. In the stills we had taken, I was the one with the Walrus head on - in the film it's different. So John then immortalised it in Glass Onion, "I've got news for you all, the walrus was Paul". Obviously at the time you don't care, it's just a Walrus head. You don't realise years later people like our friend from Georgia will analyse it.

Q. What is the quality of each of the other Beatles that you like(d) the best about? (S. Breggles, Richmond)

A. All of them - musical talent. All of them - honesty. Ringo -funny, and kind hearted. George - straightforward and open. John - witty with a soft centre, or maybe hard with a soft centre.

Q. Do the copulating beetles on the sleeve of Ram (1970) stand for F**k The Beatles? (Luc Van de Wiele, Wemmel, Belgium)

A. It happened to be a picture Linda had taken. We couldn't resist it just because of the way it looked. She'd caught these two beetles f**king, and then the significance hit us. We saw that pun, yeah, thought why not?

Q. Was there ever a third Lennon song for Anthology 3? (Jake Lennington, Rush City, MN, USA)

A. There was, but George didn't like it. The Beatles being a democracy, we didn't do it.

Q. I have a Beatles t-shirt which I bought from The Grapes (celebrated Liverpool pub). I was told the band are pictured in their favourite seats - adjacent to the Ladies where you would often catch a glimpse of the girls changing for an evening at The Cavern. True? (Alan Tomkins, Goring, West Sussex)

A. I hope so. It SOUNDS true. Had there been an opportunity to spot the girls changing, I'm sure we would have sat there.

Q. If you hadn't been a musician, what do you think you would have been? (Tony Carter, Manchester)

A. The only thing I could have probably qualified for was teaching. So I might have been an English teacher.

Q. Does it do your head in - stuff like the handwritten lyrics to Getting Better selling for $249,000 at Sothebys? (Peggy Robinson, Trinant, Gwent)

A. It's the price of fame - literally. You scribble them on the back of an envelope, and it gets to be famous. People want it, so it becomes a desirable object. Like Mozart's bog paper, which is another highly desirable object, apparently. More valuable obviously if it's been used.

Q. What is the inscription on the ID bracelet you wear? (Rachel Hyland, West Harford, Connecticut)

A. It says Paul - for when I forget who I am.

Q. How does it feel to have a star named after you (the christening courtesy of American astronomy fans)? (John Sales, Barry, Glamorgan)

A. Really cool. The good thing is that as you get on, your fans get on too. And some of them are pretty swotty. Like the people who started Apple, they were just Beatles fans, hence the name. You don't sit around looking at the sky, trying to find it, but it's like getting a very nice birthday present. I'm not religious, I don't believe in any one system - I sort of think the universe is basically benevolent and we f**k it up - but I am spiritual. I saw Stephen Hawking on TV the other night, and he was saying that we are made of the same stuff as the stars. Which is great. We are all stardust, luv.

Q. What do you want written on your gravestone? (Tom Mangold, Exeter) 

A. Here lies Gracie Fields. Anything to keep people away.

Q. Hey, is it true you are dead, and if you are, what is it like? (L.A. Patterson, Hamlet, North Carolina)

A. Yes. And it's very interesting. It's a very interesting afterlife.

[yvesdot]

hi! while i don't have anything on kishoutenketsu as an essay form, i did recently read something on why western 5-paragraph-form essay is the way it is - paul graham, in his 2004 essay 'the age of the essay,' argues that it derives from historically treating/teaching the essay like a lawyer's argument in court, with a predetermined conclusion, opening remarks, argument/supporting evidence, & closing remarks. i haven't yet followed up on his research to check for myself but i thought it was an interesting piece on essay writing. link (or google if this doesn't work): paulgraham (.) com (/) essay (.) html

hope that's something interesting to you too!!

(link)

Oh my gosh I've heard of this one! Do you know what, I think I actually read it in AP Literature, because I remember reading something that essentially said "the way you are learning essays right now in AP Literature is stupid" which made me very happy and also insufferable for the rest of the semester. This might also have been what led to the infamous Hamlet mock trial in which I was asked to argue the case that Hamlet was insane. Sorry if you're someone who knows me, because you've definitely already heard this story...

At any rate, this is delightful. On of my favorite bits: In a real essay, you don't take a position and defend it. You notice a door that's ajar, and you open it and walk in to see what's inside. That's exactly how I feel! I think some people respect me enough to think I know what I'm talking about academia-wise, and I wouldn't say so at all, so it's reassuring to hear someone who probably actually does know what they're talking about agree.

The real issue is that (it seems to me) academia is structured around perpetuating itself, so my poor teacher was exactly right that we needed the practice at what we would ultimately be stuck doing if we went much further. Boo! University was substantially better for freeform writing, but still, it's a problem throughout and I don't know how or where we get started solving it. This is a really wonderful essay for identifying the source of some of these problems and articulating them accessibly—thank you for sending it!

Also, THANK YOU for responding and sharing something you thought I might like. It's really the most flattering thing in the world. I actually enjoyed this so much I think I'll add it to my list of Essential Short Pieces On Writing—(in the voice of an adult who, as a child, had a teacher mark them for psychiatric follow-up because the way they discussed Hamlet made said teacher feel all was not well at home) I love making lists and boxes, and this will fit perfectly with my mental anthology of things all writers MUST read. Thank you thank you thank you—and thanks to all the people sending asks recently; you've all been very patient with my responses ^__^

[scotianostra]

Happy Birthday Fran Healy of Scottish Band Travis.

Although born in Stafford, England, Healy grew up in Glasgow his parents’ hometown. His mother had moved back to Scotland after divorcing her husband, who was abusive (towards her); as a result of this, Healy continues to refuse any contact with his father. Healy has said that both his mother and his grandmother were major influences on him as a child. Healy attended Holyrood Secondary School in Glasgow.

Although as a young child at primary school, he had been awarded a book of Rabbie Burns poems and a certificate “For Outstanding Singing Abilities” after singing the old Scottish song “Westering Home” while dressed in a kilt, Healy showed no further interest in singing until his teens. His obsession in song writing began to take shape when he got his first guitar in 1986 at the age of 13, having seen Roy Orbison perform his hit Pretty Woman on The Last Resort With Jonathan Ross. First songs played on the guitar were old rock'n'roll numbers like Johnny B. Good and 3 Steps To Heaven by Eddie Cochran. His first complete song was written about the Headmaster of his school, Peter Mullen entitled “Mr. Mullen Blues”

He played in a couple of school bands until drummer of Glasgow band Glass Onion Neil Primrose asked if he would like to audition. This band would become Travis, named after the main character in Wim Wenders movie Paris, Texas.

Travis’ first single, “All I Want to Do Is Rock”, was written by Healy while on a visit to Millport on Greater Cumbrae, a small island in the Firth of Clyde. Going there with the sole intention of composing the best song he had ever written, Healy surprised even himself when the track was born. In spite of Healy’s success as a songwriter since, he is without formal musical training. As the band have risen to prominence, Healy has continued to be Travis’ main songwriter, as well as the band’s main spokesman and most recognisable member.

Healy’s songwriting has been praised by Paul McCartney, Elton John and Noel Gallagher. In 2005, Coldplay frontman Chris Martin called himself “a poor man’s Fran Healy”. In interviews, Healy has talked of being influenced by songwriters such as Joni Mitchell, Paul McCartney and Graham Nash (of the Hollies and Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young fame). Healy has since played with both McCartney and Nash. Although Healy predominantly plays guitar, he has also been known to write and perform with piano.

Travis have twice been awarded British album of the year at the annual BRIT Awards, and is credited as having paved the way for British bands such as Coldplay and Keane. Travis have released nine studio albums, beginning with Good Feeling in 1997.

Fran is involved with the Save the Children Organization, for which he has just launched the biggest ever global campaign to help the ten million children who die unnecessarily each year survive, he has made visits to Sudan to highlight the plight of children in third world countries. He is a keen runner, having been a member of the Glasgow athletics club Bellahouston Harriers in his youth, and took part in the Berlin Relay Marathon in 2012.

 I’ve chosen my favourite Travis song, Fran Healy wrote it while on holiday in Israel. He wanted to go somewhere sunny because in his hometown of Glasgow it rained all the time. In an interview at the Live 8 concert, he explained that he was spending a short holiday in the southern vacation city Eilat in the middle of the winter. The city is known for it’s hot weather even during the winter time, but surprisingly it began to rain for two days during his stay. The line “is it because I lied when I was 17 is about him lying to get a job in a nightclub as a teenager.

Why Does It Always Rain On Me was their first top ten hit and when Travis began to perform this song at the 1999 Glastonbury Festival, after being sunny for several hours, it began to rain exactly when the first line was sung and ended when they finished the song! 

[mmhawkes]

Rec time!! Oh gosh, I am just going to throw a bunch at you. If you want more, or different topics/genres, I am always around.

Let’s see. You said you like medievalism, so we’re going to start there. If you have not read Name of the Rose by Umberto Eco, I cannot recommend it highly enough. It involves heresy, the inquisition, and murder, but that makes it sound much more lurid than it is. Actually, it’s been years since I have read it, and just thinking about it makes me want to go back. A more recent novel... Between Two Fires by Christopher Buehlman is a very interesting horror-adjacent novel set in 14th century France during the plague. It follows a disgraced knight who rescues a girl who hears angels. (Although, thinking strange stories that involve plagues in France… I am actually going to suggest one set in the 17th century called City of Crows by Chris Womersley. It’s excellent.) The Doomsday Book by Connie Willis is also always good — a little different from the others I have mentioned. It involves a history student from an alternate universe version of Oxford where they have time travel, who goes back to the 13th century. Then there are dual timelines between where she is, and an outbreak of sickness in the Oxford she is from. …I have no idea why so many of these involve plague. Sorry. Hild by Nicola Griffith is set in Anglo-Saxon England and follows the king’s niece through political intrigue. I can think of a lot of good nonfiction, but most of it is pretty esoteric. For fun, there is always The Monsters and the Critics by Tolkien. It’s a collection of lectures/essays, the title one being about Beowulf. There’s also, if I recall, a rather excellent essay about Gawain and the Green Knight in there.

Since you said you liked Duma Key… I am definitely going to recommend more Stephen King. My personal favourites are from early in his career — Salem’s Lot, which is sort of Dracula in 1970s Maine, and The Shining, which involves a man and his family isolated in a hotel over the winter while the ghosts of the hotel’s past take infect the father. The thing that makes his writing work is how well he understands people and place. His characters are always excellently realized. Other good horror novels… oh! Only Good Indians by Stephen Graham Jones. It’s about four people from the Blackfeet nation who are haunted by something they did when they were young, and supernatural repercussions. Warning: there is violent animal death in this one. Horror Movie by Paul Tremblay was really interesting and creepy — though I do think it had a lame ending? The Night Ocean by Paul Lafarge is not exactly a horror novel, but it’s really an amazing look at our need to believe the stories we are told. It starts with a woman whose husband killed himself after obsessively researching HP Lovecraft, and her need to understand what happened (and accept that he is dead, or not). Then it goes down the rabbit hole of all the stories that lead up to where they are.

Forensics and medicine, you said? Hm. Have you read Stiff by Mary Roach? It is about the many uses of cadavers, for medicine, forensic study, and a lot of other things. I’m not always a fan of her tone (her continued need to remind the audience that she is grossed out and uncomfortable ends up feeling disrespectful?) but it is really interesting. Doctor Mütter’s Marvels by Cristin Aprowicz is a really wonderful biography of a very compassionate 19th century doctor who is now mostly remembered for the ghoulish museum that uses his name.

I’m not great at recommending humor, sorry. There is a book called How to be Perfect by Michael Schur (the creator of the tv show The Good Place) that is a history of ethics/moral philosophy that made me laugh out loud. Which sounds weird, but there you have it.

Just decided to get 2 new books in January. One I have already decided on: Unruly by David Mitchell, because he's smart and funny. And I like his... uh... his being him I suppose. Second book... no idea. Recommendations are welcome. I keep browsing.

[mirrorforevers]

here, there, and everywhere • graham coxon/reader

this fic is based on two prompts y'all sent me:

and

this fic really tested all of my blur knowledge holy Fuck. blur as talking heads au i guess. how cool would it be if they

1. had a girl bassist instead of the cheese tory dude

2. werent as unhappy as they were in the mid 90s (just a bit)

3. were just a little 🤏🏻 bit more female friendly lets just pretend this is a universe where the blurjob passes didnt exist heh

it took me everything i had to make this sound as realistic as it could be. u know these girls who think they could fix patrick bateman or don draper? perhaps y’all could fix blur

consider this a gift n not only me writing for your prompt, @nottuned! thank u so much for all your support n encouragement n for always bein so sweet 🥺 i hope u enjoy reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it!

let’s see how many references to unfortunate britpop moments y’all can find in this

also i hope i captured the silliness of the gossip and drama in that era well. if you enjoyed it, please leave an ask telling me more! ur feedback is rly important to me 😔✊🏻

tw (?) reader has shitty parents

word count: 7.938 (this one's quite long!)

smut. set in the 90s. au.

You were unlocking your door when you heard your house phone ring. The shrill sound echoed through the empty corridors as you hurriedly unwrapped your scarf, tossing your keys and backpack on nearby furniture as you ran to answer the call.

“Hello?” You answer, panting.

“Y/N?”

“Dave?” You smile, that call was a very welcome surprise. Your friend owed you an answer.

-

A few weeks ago, Dave Rowntree, your music classmate who became a close friend, told you that he had teamed up with two other proficient musicians to form a band. Dave was ecstatic, and every day he had new stories about his new friends to tell you between breakfasts and lunches that you shared between the countless hours of rehearsals. Even though you weren't part of the group, you already felt that you knew Damon and Graham like the back of your hand. Yin and Yang. One was expansive, ambitious, vain, impulsive. The other, shy, introspective, anxious and careful.

Damon Albarn wanted to be an actor, Graham Coxon had a firm foot in the visual arts. One was a fan of grand classical compositions, the other was a Beatles fan. They had been friends since they were children, in a seemingly unbreakable bond. Damon dropped out of his theater class not only because out of a sudden he had found a bigger calling in music instead of acting, but also because he couldn't stand being away from his best friend for so long. You found yourself often imagining their faces and voices while trying to make all of the wild and endearingly funny stories Dave told you more tangible in your head.

It was not long before Dave started dropping little hints that they needed someone else for their project. “It’s not that Graham isn’t good at bass,” he’d say, “but we could do better.” It wasn't at the top of your plans to be part of a band right now, especially as you were preparing intensely to join the Royal Academy of Music, and he knew it. When you mentioned the conversations you had with Dave about the boys on your family dinner, in quiet wonder and timid want of being part of something really exciting, your parents wrinkled their noses. Focus on the greater things, they’d say. Don’t let these boys distract you from your goal.

Our goal, they meant to say. Since you were born, you never knew if the things you wanted were really your will or theirs.

But anyway.

That dynamic went on for a while, until the day Dave invited you to audition for them while you shared a Diet Coke in the tube home.

“Will it take too much of my time?” You asked, coyly.

“Bold of you to assume we’ll let you in that quickly.” He chuckles, amused by your confidence. You playfully elbow him in return. He knew how good you were at what you did, though, and there’s lightness in his tone when he continues, “But no, unless you let it. You’ll probably have to stand up to Damon every once in a while.” He sips the drink, handing it over to you.

“What about Graham? How much is he determined to make it big?”

“Damon’s the one who wants it the most. Graham’s studying Fine Arts at Goldsmiths, so. There’s still cautiousness in him.”

“Huh. Okay then.” You reply, thoughts running wild. “Do we have a time and date?”

“Is tomorrow ok to you?”

“Sure. After our class?”

“Perfect.” The train reaches his station. He ruffles your hair: “See you tomorrow then.”

“See you.”

You don’t tell anything about it to your parents, you just warn them that you’ll arrive a bit later than usual. Dave’s intel was crucial to your choice of songs: knowing Graham was the beatlemaniac and also the rational brake to Damon’s tireless ambition, you knew who to please and have as an ally, so you build an innovative and fresh mashup of Paul McCartney’s greatest basslines to play for them. Of course it could backfire, but you didn’t care. You had a hell of a good ear anyway and if Damon wanted you to play anything out of the blue, you would improvise beautifully over it.

The day comes. You didn’t know why you were that nervous for an amateur audition. You weren’t even sure if it was the right path to follow, given that, depending on how focused Damon really was and how contagious his aspiration was, being part of a band could really take you out of your predestinated course. The reason why you were so nervous, now thinking a little more about it, may be because deep inside, you want your path to be a little less predictable. You didn’t want to fill your heart with hopes that you might make it big and travel all over the world because you didn’t even know them. But… what if it clicks? You knew some people in the scene whose work was getting seriously recognized out there.

Meeting them for the first time was an enigmatic experience. Damon was incredibly brash and cocky - not the first theater kid you’ve met in your life. Graham was way more approachable, though also a bit conceited when pushed just right. You wondered if you’d fit in that boys’ club, and decided you wouldn’t be an easy target for discredit or any kind of shit they might give you. “Took me a while to fully get their trust. You’ll do just fine”, Dave said, out of their earshot.

That gave you more fuel to play amazingly well. Damon definitely wasn’t one to be impressed quickly, but he was, when you finished your set. So was Graham - Graham was starry eyed with your performance, actually. Albarn showed you a song and asked you if you could improvise to it, just as you imagined. Of course you could, on the first play. You even suggested some adjustments to its structure. Your feedback was welcomed and noted.

-

Even though everything went surprisingly well, you still weren't sure if you would be a member of “Seymour”, as they called themselves. (You knew it wasn’t the best name, but you didn’t have a better suggestion at the time so you’ve kept your opinion to yourself.) Graham became eerily quiet out of a sudden and wouldn’t cross eyes with you the entire time you were there. Damon, well, was Damon. Perhaps he thought you were too ordinary and mainstream for deciding to play Beatles when he’s trying to be the new avant-garde Jesus.

But Dave's news was different than you expected. “They really, really enjoyed your audition. As I thought they would.” You can hear the smile in his voice. "When can you rehearse with us?"

-

Months after, on your first gig as a fully formed and integrated band, Damon was hit in the face by a guy twice his size, Graham vomited onstage and you and Dave had to take care of both. A beautiful way to close the already exquisite day you had, after you fought with your parents, got kicked out of your childhood home and gave up on entering the Royal Academy of Music two days after you received your acceptance letter featuring rave reviews of your entrance exam.

Dealing with these boys - no, grown-ass men - was hard, but not completely unpleasant. If it were totally unpleasant, you wouldn’t give up on your entire life to embark on such an adventure.

You - plural you - were so gifted and Damon’s compositions were so good. You could see that artsy pretentious mess of an act going somewhere. Of course, you were a bit lost in your life, but so were they, as you ran from city to city meeting new people and trying new things in your journey to fame.

Loneliness, once a close friend, became a distant acquaintance. One you didn’t know anymore.

You confess you were getting worried, though, with how much money you had left on your savings and how much you were spending lately now that your parents weren’t an active part of your life. Wanting to eat something you cannot dream of buying without that money being really useful in a much more critical situation, not having nearly enough money to replace something important that broke or got torn off was frustrating. Some basic things became luxuries out of a sudden.

One day in particular, you very briefly mentioned that you were dying to eat a slice of chocolate cake, but your voice was so small and everyone was so immersed in their duties you thought no one gave two shits to what you said. Two days later, Graham arrived late at rehearsal with a small chocolate cake in his hands, handing it over to you like it was a completely ordinary act. Nothing in the way he acted told you he expected a reward, it was so natural and… gentle. You knew no one in your band could buy a chocolate cake without it being apocalyptic to their personal finances during that time.

That day, you were assured by fate that feeling lost together was better than feeling guided alone.

-

The band finally got on track - strictly musically speaking. Personally speaking, many contemporaries who followed you at parties and other events described you as an ever-growing odd, annoying and intermittently disarming bunch - and Blur and its members became household names, at least in the UK. It became harder and harder everyday to impose yourself as an entire industry and its target public aimed to tear you down. Men couldn’t understand.

(Graham Coxon was the one who tried the hardest to.)

It was four in the morning. You’ve got used to following your bandmates to hospitals, running away from trouble or knowing when to relish in it. But it was the first time you offered yourself to clean up dried blood from one’s face, given how much you hated seeing the fluid and even fainted when younger whenever exposed to it.

You, so delicately, wipe the saline solution-soaked cotton across Graham’s face, who flinches at the cold sensation on his still sensitive skin. He stares at you with the eyes of a child, and you couldn’t help but give him a slight, warm smile in return, which he retributes. Your face conveyed gratitude and affection towards the one you were taking care of. Your hands still struggled to stay completely still after the surge of adrenaline your body received a few hours ago.

Being the only girl in a massive band, and one the music magazines and mainstream media loved sexualizing, meant having paparazzis in your window in odd hours (not that that’s acceptable in any hour, but you had to lower your standards even more these days), meant having different photographers trying to pressure you to get into all kinds of uncomfortable angles with skimpy-ass dresses and just count on the intervention of your fellow bandmates so they would stop, also having invasive male fans who would try to harass you in any way they could.

Of course the day where one of your bandmates would get into a fist fight with one of these men inserted into these categories would come. And even though they were all protective of you, each in their own peculiar, increasingly contradictory way, Graham’s dedication to it was sometimes commendable.

You were making your way through a small corridor of people on your way to the stage when a random guy cupped one of your breasts. It’s not like the venue was incredibly tight, it could not have been on accident and it made your blood boil. You turned around to scream at him, and Graham, who was just behind you, threw a punch directly towards the man’s face, without thinking twice.

And oh boy, took a lot of people and a sweet amount of time to separate the two after that.

After all was said and done, Graham had a few scratches, a black eye and a cut brow. He kept dodging your many “sorrys”, “you didn’t have to do this” and other expressions of guilt. “You have nothing to be sorry about, he deserved it”, he kept assuring you, like a mantra, just giving in to your pleas when you supplicated to take care of his wounds during intermission and after the show.

“I get why you did what you did, Gra. I hate that you took such a risk because of me, but I understand.” you say, voice cracking from not using it for a while after spending some good minutes in complete silence taking care of him. “However,” you soak another cotton ball in the saline solution a roadie got you, punctuating the word with a squeeze to the cotton to remove excess liquid. “I was worried sick about you. What if he… had a knife or something? You could’ve got seriously injured. Or killed.”

“Don’t worry about me. I’m perfectly able to have a good fight,” after wincing from the contact of the cold wet cotton with his dried blood, he purses his lips in a forced, shy smile, trying to light up the mood. He notices your hands are still shaking from the adrenaline, and takes one of them in his bigger ones, trying to calm you down. The fact that he did this for you, coupled with the fear and how tired you felt of having to go through that kind of situation once again, made you cry-laugh from how overwhelmed you felt.

His expression changes to one of pure compassion in an instant. “Hey, don’t--oh my,” he gets up from his chair to embrace you as you pour your frustrations through fat tears running down his shoulder.

“It’s so exhausting,” you mumble, through sobs. “Now I’m putting you in danger too. I feel like I did and I’m still doing everything wrong. I should be the one giving you a shoulder to cry on.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong! Anything at all, I promise you,” he says, tenderly, running his hands through your hair, still holding you tight. “It was his fault! I decided it was the right thing to do. You’re worth the risk. What people have been putting you through is unacceptable.”

“I’m not worth the risk!” You break apart from his arms, trying to get your point across. “What would I do without you if someone killed you? You need to be more careful!”

The silence hangs heavy between you two thanks to the weight of your words.

“You should’ve asked me before you lunged at him, at least. I don’t know.” You wipe your many tears as you move towards the nearest bottle of water to try to calm yourself down. “It’ll never end. I’m so afraid that these situations will get even worse. That,” you motion at his wounds and dirty clothes, “is a bloody tragedy. It’s a tragedy things escalated to this point. You can’t do that forever.”

“This is just a consequence. And something I would do for you in a heartbeat whenever necessary.”

“Graham, I don’t want you to get hurt because--”

“They hurt you. I won’t let you go through that alone. Besides,” he comes closer to you again. “As I already told you, I can take care of myself, most of the time.” He takes your face in his hands, his fingers so delicately running across your cheeks to dry your tears. You knew that gesture wasn’t his way of asking you for anything you weren’t ready to give him yet. He just wanted you to feel safe. “And I want to take care of you.”

“I’m the one cleaning your wounds.”

“A great partnership, I think.” Coxon chuckles softly, and finally gets a smile out of you. As he always does. “And they make me look cool, don’t you think?”

“Shut up.” You giggle, still feeling too emotional to return to the stage. You sigh: “Thank you for being there for me. You know I’m still not very used to it. Just please be safe.”

The roadie returns, a little flustered by interrupting your little moment together. “5 minutes and you’re back, guys.”

“Okay!” You both turn to answer her.

“I’ll be. No need to thank me for anything, Y/N.” He answers, giving your forehead a little kiss. “Let’s go.”

“Give me two minutes. I’ll be right behind you.”

-

“What’s it like, being the only woman in the band?”

Four eyerolls at once don’t seem to faze the interviewer. She waits for your response.

Apparently the thousand invasive questions regarding Damon’s love life and the same bullshit treatment of women as either rare specimen or sex dolls is what pleases the audience of music TV shows these days.

“What do you think?” is what you say.

“Must be a thrill to have these beautiful boys around you all the time. And we’ve heard you never even took advantage of it!”

You don’t like where this is heading. “Is that… a bad thing? I don’t know what you mean.”

“Perhaps some of our lady viewers might think it is. No judgement though!” She raises her hands. “You do you, it’s just that it’s quite unexpected to see prudes in non-Christian bands. I mean… from what we’ve heard.”

“I’m sorry? What are you trying to say? What did you hear?”

Her tongue clicks while she stares at you with defiance and mischief on her eyes, as she goes a little further and raises her voice so it can overlay yours. “Oh love. You do know what I’m talking about. There’s no need to be ashamed of being a virgin.”

Your cheek burns intensely and the only thing you wished for was for the ground to swallow you whole. Dave and Graham are especially uncomfortable. Damon’s a bit amused. The three knew almost everything there was to know about you. The one topic that surprisingly they didn’t know about is that you’re still a virgin.

They know you’ve been single for a long time. They know that’s part of what draws so much attention and twisted lore regarding you and your past, but that’s not something they felt they needed to know about you at all, and you truly never felt the need to comment about that with any of them, and they haven’t asked. Not even Mr. “the way to be successful in this game is to make all the boys wanna be you and all the girls wanna sleep with you. In your case that’d work in reverse” Damon Albarn.

“Is that even something that should be discussed in an interview about our music? Is that what your boss told you to ask her about?” Dave answers, his tone venomous.

“Musicians are way more than just music. You’re entertainment in every sense of the word.”

“Who told you that about me?” You asked, not sure if you want to know the answer.

“A lovely elderly lady who lives in Elgin Crescent. She knows you so well.”

That’s your mum. That’s how far low your relationship has degraded. You’re not surprised. That doesn’t feel less like a punch on your gut, but you don’t feel like tumbling again. Not today.

“I know who you’re talking about. Tell her I asked her to go fuck herself and burn in hell. In that order.”

“But that’s your--”

“Yes, she is my mum!” If people are going to expose you anyway, then why don’t you do it on your terms? “We’re truly entertainment in every sense of the word, aren’t we. Not everyone’s mum’s a cunt. Some of us aren’t that lucky.”

“You want to be the next Gallagher sister with the spicy remarks?”

“Not sure. But I do want to be the last person you ever get to interview.”

-

The management of the band wasn’t at all surprised your interview became UK’s topic of the week. People were heavily divided between family is family and we shouldn’t hate our relatives and blood isn’t everything, family can be shitty too. Your bandmates were proud of you. The management was angry but tried to understand, and didn’t press you for further explanations. They suggested a two-week break from everything so Blur could rest their image and start a fresh cycle after that, and you gracefully accepted it.

The whole thing seemed so ridiculous the more you thought about it. Did your mum tell the reporter about that gratuitously? What was their conversation like? How did that even happen?

You became the butt of jokes in some places. You saw other famous people doing challenges between them, countdowns, all sorts of crude remarks. What a pathetic, sad chapter of your career.

You dial Graham, and you feel like your heart was about to burst out of your chest.

“Hey, Gra. It’s me.”

“Hey, Y/N.” He sounds pleasantly surprised. “How's it going?”

“Better, I guess. I have to take my mind off all that chaos though. Are you available right now?”

“Yeah.”

“You’ve been owing me a movie night for quite a while now and I miss spending time with you. Wanna come over?”

“Aww. Sure, I--um. Do you want me to bring anything?”

“I’m pretty sure I got everything we need here--ah… I think I don’t have any more beers.”

“I’ll buy some then. See ya in a few minutes.”

Actually, you couldn’t take all that chaos off your mind because that was the only thing in it. You’re feeling so nervous.

The main reasons sex wasn’t a priority for you until now were:

You didn’t have any real opportunities of losing your virginity in your teens. You were impossibly introspective until, like, 3, 4 years ago, and the way your family worked hasn’t really allowed you to get really close to people. Be it boyfriends, girlfriends or just friends. Anything that threatened to take time off the various tasks and classes your parents assigned to you just couldn’t be part of your life. To be honest, you still struggled a bit to form meaningful connections with people thanks to how you grew up.

The moment you stopped being shy, you noticed it was a real man’s world out there, especially in music, classical or not. You didn’t want anyone to think you fucked your way up to the top, you didn’t want any messy affairs. Also, you had yourself, and you didn’t get all of the hype regarding the concept of screwing someone. But apparently there’s a lot you’ve been missing, given the importance people seem to give to it. After that incident, even though you swore to yourself you wouldn’t give in to any kind of misogynistic pressure, that was one that really got under your skin.

You never really found someone who you felt 100% safe with in that sense until the one who’s about to arrive at your house appeared in your life. Bloody hell, and you don’t even have anything romantic going on. By the time you were a Blur member, you’ve fooled around a bit, but not all the way. You knew how to kiss, knew how to touch yourself and even brought manual satisfaction to some random fool you thought you were into one time. But perhaps this is the time to go all the way. Why not? Everyone knew how close you two were. He made you feel special. He was so kind. And gorgeous. And--

You hear a knock on your door. It’s him. Beers in hand, hair somewhat in place, twitchy as ever.

He comes inside and you feel like your legs will give up anytime. It was not the first time he visited you. It was one of many, actually, and he noticed you were acting… different.

“Y/N, are you okay?” He asks after a brief dialogue between you two, after plating some snacks for both of you.

“Graham...” You sigh, being really careful with your words. “What is your perception of me?”

“My perception of you?” He smiles. “I… think you’re great. You’re fun to be around. You’re one of the best musicians I know, if not the best. Why are you asking me that?”

“N-nothing. It’s nothing. Also, I asked the wrong question. What was your first perception of me?”

“Uh… the day of your audition?”

“Exactly. You barely talked to me that day.”

His eyes lower to his own feet. “I was really timid, actually. I wasn’t used to being near any girl, especially one who… w-would spend so much time around me if everything went well.”

You giggle. “I thought you hated me.”

“Never!” his smile turns into a full blown laughter. You melt at his confession. “Also because it seemed like you were trying to read my mind or something.”

“Of course! Because I thought you hated me!” Now that was a laughter you two shared. You do a voice: “‘Why is that pesky girl trying to get in my band?’”

“My goodness, no! I don’t even sound like that - you know what, I changed my mind. You suck. Because, besides the fact you don’t even know what I sound like, you still haven’t told me why you are asking me that in the first place.”

You couldn’t help but notice how he slightly cornered you physically in one of the kitchen corridors. Graham could be really persuasive when he wanted to.

“Okay. Right. Um. I’ve been thinking about some stuff.”

“What, exactly?”

“Everything that happened this month. The great virginity debacle,” you roll your eyes, and he scoffs.

“You don’t own anyone any information about what you do or don't do with your life. Everyone’s being so invasive. That was incredibly childish of the reporter to do, and we talked about that hundreds of times.”

“Yeah, but… you know what, forget it.”

“Tell me, Y/N. I just said that because I want you to know you were not in the wrong.”

“I know. It’s just… I’ve been thinking that maybe it’s silly for me to… keep closing myself for affection. Any kind of affection.”

“What are you talking about?” His brows furrowed in curiosity.

“I’m not sure if it’s the pressure that finally got under my skin, but… I’m willing to learn what all the fuss is about. Maybe it’s silly that I’m still a virgin.”

He bites his lips, still processing what you just said, expression unreadable. Perhaps you’ve treaded a ground you shouldn’t. You step back both literally and figuratively. “I’m sorry I even brought that up--”

“No, no, don’t be.” He assures you. “I’m just… surprised, that’s all. I swear.”

“And...” You know what. You already went too far, so why not go all the way. You’ve already gone way past the point of no return. “I was wondering if… you would… popmycherry?”

His eyes widen, yours still closed. When you finally open them, he’s closer to you again.

If his head was a machine, you’re sure it would be releasing lots of steam and shaking due to overprocessing. You felt like you just ruined everything.

“Y/N, you don’t need to do it if you don’t really want to.”

“But I want it! At first I thought I didn’t, but then I thought...”

“I don’t want to be part of that if you’re just doing it to fulfill weird expectations.”

“But it’s not that. Not just... that. I asked about your perception of me because I really like you, Gra. I think we should be more than friends and I wanted to know what you think about me. And I want to know what the fuss is about, yes, but I’m not telling you that just so I can lose my virginity to prove some point. I’m telling you that because I like you, I want to kiss you, and I think it would be a great idea if you showed me what it’s like. Y-you know, sex.”

“I-I can’t believe it. Did you even have any movie in mind?” His smile’s back, but you’re still not confident about what his answer will be.

“I didn’t. I’m sorry. You don’t have to--”

He sighs. “I was in love with you the moment I first saw you, actually.” He says it like he’s releasing a huge load out of his back, his arms crossed. Now your eyes widen, and you hold your breath without even noticing. “I didn’t want you to feel pressured. I know how you feel, or, felt about relationships, so… there wasn’t any reason for me to tell you that. And what I said about being timid was just half of the truth.”

“Huh?”

“I also was really intimidated by how pretty you looked. You can’t imagine how.”

“No way.”

“It’s true. I felt like I wasn’t even worthy of looking at you, really.”

“You’re joking. That’s mean, Gra.”

“I’m not. I’m really not.” He doesn’t look like he is joking. He looks relieved. “I’m really not. That’s why I’m so surprised by your request.”

“I’m nothing special.”

“You are everything to me. But I can’t accept your offer, not now.”

“Are you… seeing someone? Am I too late?”

“No. Definitely not. I just want you to be sure you’re not doing it because people are saying you should.”

“Graham, I’m a grown woman.”

“I know.”

Graham carefully presses his slightly chapped lips to yours, kissing you for a few precious, heart stopping seconds before pulling away; his voice is impossibly silky when he suggests, “Let’s watch a movie. How about The Godfather? I heard it’s airing tonight. Then, if in two weeks you don’t change your mind, tell me and I’ll be glad to help you with what you want. Do we have a deal?”

“That’s so unfair. I want you so bad.” You whisper.

“Tell me if you still do in two weeks.”

You sigh, defeated. “...Deal.”

-

You definitely notice the subtle shift in Graham’s personality and actions after that fateful night. If you were already close, both figuratively and literally, it now seemed like he would use any excuse to always touch you, be near you, sometimes tease you. The shift was subtle, though, don’t forget it’s still Graham Coxon we’re talking about - the constant “is it okay if”s or “is it alright if I”s were still there, as careful as ever. You don’t even talk about your deal that entire time, or even kiss again - sometimes you wondered if it was even real or just a fabrication of your mind.

The way he now caressed your hand discreetly when you listened to Damon’s ramblings, the way his hands now went directly to your waist when your games became too handsy, the way he seemed to be madly in love with everything you were and still are from the start - made you realize you were ready for this man to be a consistent part of your life.

The dust of the controversy was settled, and your own intentions were 100% clear to you now. The societal pressure has waned. The need for Graham to be your first persisted. After exactly 2 weeks have passed, you call him again, yearning to share the answer with him.

One beep.

Two beeps.

Three beeps.

Four beeps. “Hello?”

You release a sigh hidden deep inside of your lungs. “Graham, it’s Y/N.”

“Oh. It’s been two weeks.” You could hear the contemplative tone of his voice.

“...Yeah. That’s precisely the reason I’m calling you.”

“Do you still want to…?”

“...Desperately.”

“Ok.” He chuckles, flustered as hell on the other side of the phone, probably one of the prettiest sounds you’ve ever heard. “Right. Ok. Your place or mine?”

“I think there’ll be an element of mystery if I go to your place this time.” You lose some of the constraints this silly shyness has been tying you on. “Do you have everything we might need there?”

“We don’t need a dungeon, you know.”

“The basics.” You make your smile heard.

“I do have… I do have the basics.”

“See you in a few minutes then.”

“Will you want to… ease into it? Or just go straight to it?”

“God, don’t make it awkward!” Your cheeks burn, your smile turning into contagious laughter. “Maybe… I don’t know. Ease into it, I guess? A movie night… but with s-something else?”

“Okay. Sounds good.”

“Alright then. See you.”

“See you.”

-

You don’t choose any particularly fancy or sexy clothes, instead settling for a slightly oversized yellow striped shirt he gave you as a birthday present some months ago and some skirt that fit you well. He wasn’t one to lavish his loved ones with gifts all the time, but few things were as precious as the look on his face whenever he saw you wearing something he gave you or, hell, even eating something he paid for you. You’re thrilled to see it again when he opens the door for you, it easing some of your deepest doubts.

2001: A Space Odyssey is already playing on the TV when you arrive. Despite it being one of your favorite movies of all time, and his, you’re not mad it was already halfway through when you arrived. It wasn’t your main priority to rewatch it for the 17th time tonight.

He offers you some wine, which you accept to ease the nerves. You sit on his couch, and he shares the cozy space with you, now mindlessly throwing one of his arms around your shoulders. You cuddle up to him, and everything seems peaceful in the world for a while.

The tip of his fingers softly caress your lifted knee, absentmindedly. You couldn’t help but notice how well his body fits with yours, how your skin was apparently made for him to touch, and the anxiety rumbles in your stomach like a storm in a wild wavy sea. After some minutes, you raise your head, his big brown eyes meeting yours as if asking you a silent question. You leaned up a bit more to press your lips to his, in a silent answer. The sweetness in him makes this moment as precious as every other moment you ever shared with him. His hands enter your hair, making you shiver a bit from the unfamiliarity and the electricity of it all - but it doesn’t sway you from deepening the kiss, wanting more of his taste, more of this, more of him.

“Do you wanna take this to the bed?” He whispers, after noticing your moans were becoming more frequent and needy. You nod, and you are taken by surprise when he carries you bridal style to it, hiding your excited giggles in his broad shoulders.

Graham wasn’t exactly the most organized man in the world - so the fact that his bedroom was now impossibly tidy was something that positively caught your attention. He put some planning into this. He lays you down and you part your legs, beckoning him to meet you between them. He does, and you go back to the breathtaking makeout session. You notice he’s holding himself back a bit, taking his time, his warm tongue moving smoothly, not hurriedly, against yours. His self control falters a bit though, given how he can’t stop grinding against you. You follow the rhythm of his hips a bit timidly and not nearly as in sync as you’d really like, though the pressure his covered cock is creating against your core can already be felt and some particular thrusts are able to fill at least partially the aching, wet need growing within you.

“How do you feel about oral?” He asks, breath warm near your ear, his voice raspy and spent by his desire for you.

“Um… It would be my first time receiving or doing it.”

“Would you like me to go down on you?”

“Wow. I never thought I would hear you saying something like that.” You smile, still assimilating the situation you’re in, trying not to show how badly his voice is affecting you. “Sure.”

“I never thought I would get to propose this to you. Aren’t we full of surprises lately.” He smiles back, warmly. He notices your hands trembling a bit from how anxious you are while you’re taking off your underwear with his help, and as he lowers himself to where you need him most, he takes your hands in his as an act of reassurance. “Tell me what you like. Tell me if what I’m doing works for you. I want this to be a great experience.”

“You want me to get addicted to you, that’s what you want,” He chuckles, lovingly kissing your thigh as a reply. “Okay, Gra. Guess I’ll find out along the way.”

You quickly take a peak below you to see the lower half of his face disappear in the middle of your thighs. The sight alone sets your fire ablaze, as he hooks his arms around your thighs and lifts you closer to his mouth, his lips ghosting over the curls between your legs tantalizingly and his breath catching when your hips jerk forward.

As he begins his ministrations, you immediately notice it’s unlike anything you’ve ever felt. That feeling was completely alien to you. It was even wetter than you expected, and weird, but powerfully pleasant. Before this exact moment, you had a firm belief that hardly anyone else would make you feel the same way, or better, than you do yourself, but apparently you were very wrong. Thankfully you were wrong. “My god,” you gasp as the flat of his tongue drags over your folds, too much and not enough, and you jerk at the contact. “This is great. So weird, but-- great.”

He moans at your response, his movements carefully enthusiastic. He works his tongue between your folds and traces up to curl the tip of it around your clit, and it’s quite endearing and madly arousing to see how he eats out you like you’re the sweetest and tastier dessert he has ever tasted. You involuntarily buck against him with a desperate sound the moment he moves his tongue and lips in a particularly wicked way, something that definitely doesn’t go unnoticed by him, but you still feel the need to highlight in case it didn’t - “That. Keep doing that, please,”

And he does. The building of this climax is also different than the ones you already had by your own hands, and is more coy. As he sees the drops of sweat sliding along your soft skin and the expressions on your face as you get lost in this new but enchanting sensations, his hesitation and self-control fades away; there’s nothing uncertain in the way he buries his face in your cunt now, nothing restrained in the groan he lets out as he devours you and drinks you down as if you’re the first stream of water he has seen in days.

His tongue glides deeper in your folds again and again, swirling up through the wetness you’re coated with to tease at your clit while he grunts and strains closer, squeezing your thighs with both hands tight. The wave of heat inside of you is cresting so fast, you don't even know how to tell him, how to signal that you’re nearly done for and, in the end, it happens too fast to even try. He sucks at your clit, circling it with his tongue, once, twice, and then you’re crying out, shaking underneath him, trying to keep your thighs from clenching too hard around his head as he laps you through it with with urgent whimpers and moans, as if he cannot have enough of you.

You’re still trembling when he rises, the look on his face revealing to you how proud he feels by making you feel this way. It looks so good on him.

You fail miserably at the simple task of connecting words together after that, choosing instead to collect your remaining strength, prop yourself up and beckon him again to keep kissing him and learn, through his talented tongue, how you taste. He kisses the thin fabric of the shirt at your chest that covers you from view, your throat, your jaw, and before he reaches your impatient lips, he notes, sinfully, “Seems like you enjoyed yourself, love.”

“That was… unbelievable. Stars, I want to make you feel good too. Please show me how.”

“Keep kissing me,” he begs, voice still strained from how aroused he is. “I want to be inside you so bad. Let’s get you prepared.” You’re still so sensitive, you tread on overstimulation when his fingers lightly touch your clit, making you break the kiss in a hiss. He traces a line on your folds, inspecting the impact his mouth had on you. “So wet for me.”

“Bit slower, Gra,” He complies to your breathy plea, his fingers now more tame as he slowly spreads your wetness throughout your pussy. He stretches towards the nightstand to grab a bottle of lube, interrupting his contact to spread some on his fingers before unhurriedly slipping his middle finger inside of you. The coldness of the gel makes you shiver in surprise, the easiness brought by it very welcomed. Again - the sensation is odd. Completely unfamiliar. The feeling of having something inside of you for the first time, going further than you ever dared to try, probing, exploring; the coldness of the lube clashing against your burning hot cunt. But it also felt nice. The focused look on his face was adorable, he looked like he was a scientist in the middle of very complex research.

Despite the panting, the messy hair and the fire in his eyes.

Your body already has a lot of new sensations to process simultaneously, so when he asks you to take off your bra and shirt so his tongue can work on your nipples - which you gladly accept, you feel like you’re on sensual overload. His tongue, again, so talented, takes your mind off the slight burning you feel when he introduces his ring finger to your soaked, throbbing core, his focused, carefully overpowering and constant stimulation driving you insane.

“Does it feel good?” He asks, voice muffled by your breast. You nod, carried by the wave of pleasure sweeping you.

“Yes. God, yes.” You pant, tangling your fingers tightly on his thick hair as an encouragement, a desperate sound escaping from your lips the moment he reaches a certain point within you you didn’t even know existed, hot mouth continuing to lick and suck your nipple. Even though you were spent by your last orgasm, he was indeed getting you addicted to those new feelings, and even though this was heavenly, truly heavenly, you needed more. “Gra, I’m ready, I think.”

“You sure?”

“Yes. Please.”

Releasing your nipple from his lips with a sounding pop, he eagerly frees himself from his trousers - hard as a brick - and puts protection and lubrication on, swiftly positioning himself between your thighs while stroking himself to the sight in front of him. You motion to take off your skirt, and he holds your hand, not letting you. “Don’t. It’ll be really hot to fuck you in this.” He confesses, giving your forehead a kiss in a very different context than before. He aligns his forehead with yours, each of your lips just barely touching while you breathe each other’s air. He looks deep into your eyes, slowly running the tip of his cock between the slick folds of your pussy, coating himself in the remnants of your pleasure. “Do you trust me?”

You trust me to know your limits? Not to go any further if you don’t really want me to?

“Absolutely.”

The only response you get from him is a shuddering, helpless moan into your mouth and you hold him tighter to you, grinding your still sensitive cunt up against his cock while he pulls hard at the soft fur next to your head. You feel your soaking pussy lips part around the solid curve of his length and gradually coat the underside of him in slick with every gentle circle and roll your hips make, as he finally pulls away from your mouth to drop his forehead to your neck. He then, very slowly, penetrates you, stopping when he hears the noises you make indicating you’re struggling to adjust to his presence. Out of everything you’ve felt in the last minutes, this was by far the most painful sensation. “This-- is new,” you note, your face completely incapable of hiding the discomfort. He also notices that.

“Are you okay? Do you want me to stop?”

“It’s okay. I’ll get used to it.”

“It’s not supposed to be about endurance, you know.” He says, a bit breathless and worried, caressing your hair. “Tell me when it’s okay to move. Or if you feel too much pain.”

After some long seconds and some deep breaths, you say: “Okay. Go on.”

“As you wish.”

He moves inside you at a very slow pace, the lubrication clearly making it easier for you to handle it. It still hurts, significantly, but the sensation of being filled is also surprisingly arousing.

His hand moves to your sensitive clit again in small, measured circles, your little moans being a mixture of the pain of penetration and the sheer ecstasy of seeing him falling apart because of you. The way his chest heaves while the drops of sweat start pearling his fair skin, the furrowed brows and broken groans, the thickness of him as he rests heavy up against your entrance, the way his voice presses deliciously tight in his throat as he gasps out into the quiet room - everything’s making your chest burst in love and satisfaction. You tighten your grip around him and roll your hips up into his cock, letting it break you open nice and slow; it stretches you wide with a deliciously sharp fullness and pleasure rips through you, and Graham becomes even more vocal as he picks up a steady and gradually faster pace. He turned all of your keys, it’s about time you turn some of his.

“Graham, deeper,” you whimper, continuing to tighten your legs and hoist yourself up, lifting your hips to take his cock deeper inside you. His name rips itself from your throat while Coxon clenches his jaw and starts to lose himself in the pleasure, holding you down into the bed while he allows your desperation to guide him to the perfect angle and speed to sate you. He found denying you to be impossible.

He snarls and curses as he holds you down and rails you, determined to make you sing again before he finishes, and to his delight, your heightened sensitivity gives him what he wants. And this time, he couldn't hold on.

Graham kisses you one last time as he groans and gives in, head dropping to your neck again. You didn’t reach a second climax, but stars, what an experience you just had.

When he comes back to himself enough to realise he still had you practically folded in half, he carefully pulls his softening cock free, taking the condom off and taking the strands of hair out of your face as you struggle to catch your breath. You suggest a shared bath, a suggestion he gladly accepts.

Too tired and too sore for pillow talk, comfortable silence falls as your hand finds his, and you lay, listening to each other’s breathing slowly settle.

I could get used to his little snore on my chest, is the last thought that twinkles on your mind before you fall asleep snuggled with him.

[starryluce]

S’mores

^^Gif is not mine

A/N- This is my first time writing for the beatles 

The Beatles x reader

Words-618

Summary- after studying abroad in America for a semester, you come back and teach the boys how to make s'mores 

Being without the boys for a semester was hard. You studied abroad in America, while they did small concerts in Liverpool. You made phone calls to each of them at least every other day, but it didn't make it less hard. But finally, you were back and made sure you called a group meeting right away. You and the boys had a hideout. Nothing too special just a small place outside the park where you'd go to get away from everything. You didn't even reach your flat that night, you went directly to a payphone and met them at the hideout. You were the first to arrive, you pulled your blanket out and placed a hardcover book to steady a single unscented candle. 

“Well, if it isn't our favorite girl,” John smirked, opening's arms for you to hug him. You didn't hesitate and jumped into his arms. He was holding you by your thighs, while your arms were around his neck. “Why do you always have to hog her? you wanker!”. George hit John's arm softly, though if he wasn't holding on to you it would have been hard. You let go of John and he set you back down.

 “Don't get jealous, Geo” you kissed him on the cheek and pulled into a hug, while whispering in his ear, that you secretly liked him better than John. You pulled away from George and went to Paul. “Now tell me, love, how did you manage to get more beautiful in only a few months,” Paul said, while grabbed your hand bringing it to his lips. “You flatter me, Paul” you laughed. While he went to hug you, but before he could Ringo grabbed you and turned you around so you could hug him instead. “We were having a moment!” Paul argued, pulling your shoulder back. “Well now we’re having a moment,” Ringo retorted. You pulled back from Ringo giving him a quick smile before facing all of them. 

“I have a surprise!” you exclaimed while opening your backpack. “Did you get us a present?” Paul joked

“My god, I hope it's a picture of you in a Bikini ” John smirked, George hit his arm while nagging something about how John doesn't even believe in god, while John joked that he was a god.

“Boys” you warned while getting graham crackers, chocolate, and marshmallows out of your bag. “What's this for love?” Ringo asked while grabbing a marshmallow and eating it. “Glad you asked, were making s'mores” you took a seat in front of the candle, lighting it with a match.

“some more of what?” Paul question, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion taking a seat across from you, while the rest of the boys tried to sit as close as possible to you. John decided to sit behind you so you could rest you back against his chest. While George decided to lay his head across your legs with Ringo sat beside on the opposite side of George.

“No, Paul a s’more” you snorted

“I don-” Paul began but you cut him off. “You're killing me, listen you take a fork. Next, you put a marshmallow on the fork, then you put the marshmallow in the fire. Now you take the gram and put the chocolate on it and finally you put the marshmallow on the gram and take the fork out.” You explained while showing them. And you finally handed the s’more to Paul. “Hey, I wanted to try it first,” George whined lifting his head from your leg. 

“I’ll help you make yours,” you said making George smile. The night ended with all the boys passed out on the blankets all cuddled up to you, while you blew the candle out.