#writing protagonists

[secondhandsorrows]

Writing a Strong Premise That Checks All the Boxes

To begin, a strong story premise sets the foundation for an engaging narrative. It can be anywhere between a single sentence to a short paragraph -- I, myself, tend to write both ways and think slightly-longer premises are just fine. It depends on how to-the-point you want your premise to be for a quick summary, or if a longer one offers more context to have it make more sense. The goal is to communicate the heart of your story efficiently in simple terms without overwhelming the reader.

First, here's some examples of strong premises:

"A smart young girl, raised by uncaring parents, discovers she has magical powers which she uses to teach her tyrannical headmistress a lesson." - (Matilda, by Roald Dahl)

"A rehearsal is in progress when the actors are suddenly interrupted by six mysterious people, who demand to be put in a play. They are the characters of a story yet to be written." - (Six Characters in Search of An Author, by Luigi Pirandello)

"When world-renowned Harvard symbologist Robert Langdon is summoned to a Swiss research facility to analyze a mysterious symbol—seared into the chest of a murdered physicist—he discovers evidence of the unimaginable: the resurgence of an ancient secret brotherhood known as the Illuminati…the most powerful underground organization ever to walk the earth." - (Angels and Demons, by Dan Brown)

Not only is your story condensed to one sentence (or two, or three...), but it should, at the very least, be understandable enough to the potential reader, not only providing a short summary that hits the boxes we will discuss here, but also asking a main question that arises from the premise (such as: will the main character succeed in their plans, or will they fail in the longrun?). The idea of the main question is a whole new can of worms that makes me want to write a new post in of itself, so for now, let’s just get into the elements of a good premise.

Here are some points to ensure your premise is strong enough and compelling:

1. The Protagonist: Introduce the main character(s) and their primary goal or desire. Draw attention to what makes them more important and stand out from others. Keep in mind as you write: Why is this their story to tell… what makes them the prime candidate worth experiencing this story? 

2. The Antagonist / Opposition: You don’t necessarily have to dive into the villain and their motivations in your premise, if you have one, but you should mention the forces, people or not, that stand in the way of the protagonist. This opposition often drives conflict and tension.

2. External Conflict: Branching off from the last step, a strong premise often includes inherent conflict and high stakes. Identify what's at stake for your protagonist, what they want, and what obstacles they face in achieving their goals. What does the protagonist have to gain or lose? 

3. Internal Conflict: On the flip side of the prior step, also be sure consider the internal struggles or dilemmas the protagonist may face. This could be emotional, moral, or psychological challenges that add depth to their journeys. You could hint at potential character growth or change. 

4. Exploration of Themes: A good premise hints at the themes your story will explore. Think about the underlying messages or ideas your premise conveys. Also think about the emotional impact of your premise: does it evoke curiosity, excitement, fear, or empathy?

Remember that a strong premise isn't just about a catchy or original idea, but also about how well it sets the stage for the narrative to unfold. It should capture your audience's imagination and make them eager to read your story. 

Feedback can be a useful tool to determine whether or not your story’s premise is strong enough. Don’t be afraid to share your premise with others: get different perspectives to understand how your premise resonates with different readers, see if their expectations align with your own or challenge you to think outside of the box. Refine your premise through multiple iterations — expand through various plot points or characters for different outcomes. Open your mind to new possibilities until there’s one that really sticks with you. 

Also remember that your premise doesn’t have to contain every element or plot device of your story — that will be apparent in the finished product. For now, take the points that are most important, especially the ones that make you most excited to share this story in the first place. 

Sources linked!

[vvanillavveins]

I don't think we give Jonathan Harker nearly enough credit for his absolutely unhinged choices. In 1897, that pathetic wet cat of a man was written with enough grit, willpower, and raw human stupidity to rival any of our modern horror podcast protagonists. When faced with a centuries-old vampire, in a coffin, drenched in fresh blood, he really thought the best thing to do was to hit it in the face WITH A SHOVEL. The audacity. The misplaced confidence. The sheer desperation. No plan. No hesitation. Running on fear and spite alone. And i fucking love him for it. Truly the character of all time.

[tediousmalcontentt]

my favorite scene in all of literature is when Neil Josten wakes up in Columbia after being drugged, hurls an alarm clock at Aaron, dumps his water on the floor and throws the cup at Aaron, stuff his clothes down the toilet and squeezes out through the window, has the foresight to call Matt from a pay phone to protect his shit, hitch hikes back to campus, eyes back to brown?? shows up on Wymack’s door like 😜 and reveals he could speak German the whole time?? CHARACTER OF ALL TIME, that is a protagonist who knows how MOVE THE MFING PLOT ALONG

[shhhhimwatchingthis]

My favourite underrated thing about Louis de Point du Lac is that he truly is the least curious vampire to ever be made and he does not give fuck about vampires despite being one.

Its Claudia who goes to libraries, reads the folklore, tries to learn as much as she can and pushes Lestat for answers about who made him and where the others are. Claudia says Vampire Pride and Louis says hmmm Vampire Tolerance.

And Louis...truly does not care about vampire history,law, culture. He's never even thought to ask. There are vampire laws?...ok...Lestat never cared about them and he's not going to either, lol. He's broken a few and he will continue to do so. Oh you have a coven? he's not gonna join it, he's gonna do his own thing. but good for you good for you.

the 500+ year old Coven Leader, he's gonna call Louis, Maitre, actually.

He has fire powers? thats kinda cool. he'll learn that but only cause it lets him vent his feelings about Lestat.

Lestat and Armand say the name of the vampire queen in front of him and Lestat straight up says, "Louis has no idea who that is" and do you think Louis cares, outside of the fact that for some reason it means he can't kill Lestat? No! Do you think in the 77 years he's been with Armand he ever took 5 minutes to ask a follow up question? No!

Do you think he will care about Akasha in season 3? Doubt it! Outside of her obsession with Lestat, who is the only person left on the planet he seems to be able to filter Caring About This Shit through

He blatantly breaks the 3rd law and publishes a book about being a vampire and when the other vampires get pissed not only does he not apologise he literally sends them his location and says 'you wanna fight? lmao don't miss'

I love him. Daniel Molloy is gonna need to bring his A game because Louis will not be solving a single mystery next season, nor would it even occur to him to try.

[sarrinight]

4 chapters of this is a diabolical running theme btw LMAO

also the other instance happening in "Berdly's romantic fantasy about Susie"

[the-modern-typewriter]

"Please."

The villain raised an eyebrow, but didn't otherwise look up from their desk. "You can walk out of that door any time, darling. I'm not stopping you."

"I'd come back. It wouldn't - I don't want to break our deal."

"You don't want the consequences of breaking our deal. You absolutely want to break it."

"People are dying," the hero snapped. "I can help."

"Mm, of course you can. You're a miracle on legs."

"I'm just suggesting a pause," the hero said. "A temporary change of terms. That's all."

"And I'm just saying no."

The hero stopped on the other side of the table, fingers digging into the fine wood in an effort to control their temper. They took a deep breath. Released. Another.

"I'm still yours," the hero said. "I'd still be yours."

"Always. But N-O spells no."

"I'm begging," the hero said, through gritted teeth.

"Is that what that is?" The villain finally deigned to glance up. Their eyes - a dark and stormy night for all bad things to happen in - did not match their light tone. The amused curve of their slight smile. "Gosh. Your standards are slipping. You're not even kneeling or anything."

"Would you say yes if I knelt?"

The villain's head tipped to one side. "No," they said, after a long moment. "But I'd sincerely appreciate the view. Perhaps it might even distract you from this latest bout of self-loathing."

"Screw you."

"But it's so much more fun when you do it, dear."

"This is serious!"

The villain scoffed and merely pointed a finger at the door, expectant and waiting.

The hero's jaw clenched hard enough to hurt but they didn't move.

"Mm," the villain said. "Are you kneeling or are we done here?"

The villain could have lied, they knew that. They could have pretended there was a chance that they'd say yes. They could have offered false hope, only to rip it away again once they'd had their fun.

In the grand terms of their arrangement, the villain had done absolutely nothing wrong. They were even, in their own particular way, being kind.

There was a bitter taste in the hero's mouth.

"It's bad out there," they said, voice cracking. "People need me. They could - maybe it could be fun. You've never played at saving the world, have you? We could do it together. Go together. It could be an experiment. A game."

"Perhaps," the villain shrugged. "But I don't think that would be very good for your mental health."

"This isn't very good for my mental health!"

The villain simply looked at them.

The hero could leave. They could end the deal at any time.

But, then, the villain would simply leave too. An apocalypse slipping free of its gilded cage. The horrors on the TV would seem mild compared to the fight to come.

"I could be back in an hour," the hero said. "You wouldn't even notice I was gone."

"And I could end the world by lunch time," the villain said. "You'd be dead before you had time to be too distressed. What's your point?"

"You really don't care what's happening out there?"

"No."

"You have to care."

"I don't."

"If you're worried I'd get hurt-"

"-I'm not. I'd slaughter anyone who tried to hurt you before they got the chance."

The hero's mouth dried. Their fingers flexed on the table. They wanted to scream. Fight. Throw things.

The villain leaned back in their chair and sighed, at whatever they read on the hero's face.

"You are saving the world, love," they said. "You're here. With me. Do I need to prove that I still have teeth?"

"No," the hero said. "I - no. Thank you."

The villain nodded, just once. "Good. Come here."

"It's okay. I - I'm okay."

"You're not. Come here."

Feeling foolish, and furious, and raw, the hero rounded the desk. The villain's arm wrapped around them, pulling them close. The grip was painfully tight, mercifully impossible to wriggle free from, and so the hero had to settle against them. They could hide the prickle of tears against the deceptively vulnerable line of the villain's neck.

They stayed like that until the hero could no longer hear the screaming beyond the window.

[noknowshame]

always a fun time when real life people are doomed by their own narratives. like guys you know it doesn’t have to be like this right? this isn’t a stageplay the foreshadowing isn’t real until you make it real

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Sunrise, Parabellum.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[slaying-holofernes]

tag list

[da-janela-lateral]

It seems that 'popular', 'athletic' and 'bright blue eyes' aren't their only similarities.

[gurggggleburgle]

i think it be really funny if the reason why Shen Yuan feels he is gigachad brain in terms solving problems, being better than Shen Qingqiu, and making solutions while scoffing being like 'haha typical PIDW writing I'm so smart' isn't because he's actually trope savvy; but that because the world is based on Airplane's writing it means the world's collective intelligence cannot be smarter than its creator and intention. And PIDW is dumb on purpose in a lot of ways.

Like Shen Qingqiu sits in on Luo Binghe's meetings and offers bare bones economic theory and gets so much genuine praise and he's lording over how smart and cool he is for this.

Meanwhile Shang Qinghua has been begging the system to raise the bar since day 10. Man's taught himself so much theory and philosophy not because he's a scholar but because being in a room with people who are only as smart as you for thirty someodd years would drive a lot of people insane eventually. And you'd think having a fellow transmigrator would help but it's very obvious outside of lore man has the intelligence of shiny rock and he just can't man.

[secondhandsorrows]

The Passive Protagonist: Pt. 2

In this post we'll be going over ways we can identify a passive protagonist.

Here are some points to look out for in your stories or works you're critiquing:

The character lacks a strong desire or goal. 

The character is able to survive/get through the hurdles seemingly by only sheer luck.

The character tends to react more to the situations around them, barely taking any action or proactive steps toward something.

The character waits for the antagonist to make their move, simply allowing the events and mishaps to them. 

The character “plays it safe” way too often. 

The character lacks a distinct personality and simply exists just for the reader (or the author) to insert themselves in.

Alternatively, the character possesses only good or mostly neutral traits. They lack big flaws, weaknesses, or talents that make them stand out or interesting. 

The scenes feel episodic, or more like “one-offs” without clear direction or progress being made. 

A good rule of thumb when it comes to avoiding passive protagonists is to know that they are more likely to occur in plot-driven stories rather than stories that are character-driven. It's easy to try and wedge a character into a series of events and calling it a day. Consider what makes your protagonist integral to the plot in ways more than one... and especially consider how the plot might change them. Don't forget the vice versa, such as how the character's actions might influence the plot.

Hope this helps!

[disgracefulthings]

Modern Day Scum Villain AU where Shang Qinghua adopts Luo Binghe who was left abandoned with no family, or so everyone thought. One day Tianlang-Jun (I have no idea what his human name would be) shows up and reveals that he is Binghe's birth father. Turns out he was sent to prison on false charges, and when he was let out he learned that his lover was dead and so he tracked down their son. He doesn't want to take Binghe away from Shang Qinghua, mostly because he thinks he would be a shit father on his own, so they agree to co-parent the kid. The people around them are like ' this is going to end up like one of those love stories where both parents fall for each other', but nope, Shang Qinghua and Tianlang-Jun can't stand each other. Their parenting style differs too much and they keep getting in each other's way. The situation gets worse when Shang Qinghua starts seeing Mobei-Jun (again, I don't know what to do for a human name), which adds to him trying to be Binghe's step father

[liberandi-causa]

Warmth

"Most absurd is," Hero scowls, "you cuddling me to sleep on the basis of a fever—do you really have a fever?"

"Mmhm, all thanks to you." Villain craddles Hero closer, full lips settling to the top of Hero's head.

"Then, why are you the big spoon?"

"The sick one gets a pass, now hush and sleep."

And they did, a blissful one — surprisingly even to Hero, who has been suffering from recent episodes of insomnia.

Little did Hero know, aside from controlling the flames, Villain can also regulate his body temperature freely.

[waitineedaname]

i was thinking my little thoughts while falling asleep last night, and a concept occurred to me: what if binghe learned about the system not from shen qingqiu, but from shang qinghua

look, he likes shang qinghua alright. he's pretty disinterested in p much anyone who isn't shen qingqiu, but on the list of People Luo Binghe Tolerates, shang qinghua is relatively high. he gave him advice on wooing sqq, after all, and sqq likes his company, so binghe tolerates his shang-shishu

but the thing is, shang qinghua is a spy. has been for decades. binghe knows this. really, everyone knows this at this point, which isn't a great look for a spy, but still. and since shang qinghua is a spy for mobei-jun, who is a subordinate for luo binghe, then technically shang qinghua is also working for him, but you don't get to the position of demon emperor without a healthy amount of suspicion for everyone in your court

so he decides to test shang qinghua a little bit. nothing major, just a little poking around in his dreams. he starts out with a subtle touch, just sifting through his memories. most of it is what he expected. he sees his time on an ding as a disciple and then later as peak lord, he sees him working for mobei-jun. he sees mobei-jun in some compromising situations, which he files away for later, and then sees him in an entirely different flavor of compromising situations, and binghe immediately decides to act like he never saw that

then he decides to take a more direct approach and starts nudging the dreams in other directions, to see how he might react to certain scenarios, test his loyalty. he expects shang qinghua to act cowardly, or bluff his way through a situaton, maybe even draw his sword if pushed far enough

what he doesn't expect is for shang qinghua to frown at the changes luo binghe made and go "I didn't write it like this"

what

binghe is so bewildered by that response that he loses his grip on the dream for a second, and before he knows it, shang qinghua has spun the dream scenario back into the way the scene originally played out. he steps back and looks satisfied. "there we go," he says. "that's how it went. you know, if I'd known I'd be dealing with this scene myself, I would've written it differently"

what the hell does that mean?

fascinated, luo binghe continues to test him. most of the time, when he toys with someone's dream, they're completely unaware of the changes. shang qinghua, despite not seeming aware that he's lucid dreaming, seems very aware of how each scene should go. except for, strangely, many of the scenes that binghe himself was in. binghe pulls up one from his disciple days, one of the times he remembered shang qinghua coming to qing jing on some errand. he hadn't even changed anything yet, had just let the dream version of his younger self launch himself at shizun in a tacklehug, but shang qinghua tsks and takes the reins from him before he can make any edits. "sorry bing-ge, but that was just way too out of character," shang qinghua says. the dream copy of luo binghe's younger self is sent further away, watching the peak lords with a sullen gaze. he's skinnier than binghe remembers being at this age, and one of his eyes is swollen with a purple bruise. that doesn't make any sense, luo binghe thinks. he hadn't been beaten on qing jing peak for years at this point.

the shen qingqiu beside shang qinghua in the dream stands with his back straight as a ruler, and when his gaze lands on luo binghe, he sneers behind his fan. shang qinghua sighs. "cucumber-bro really wasn't as good of an actor as he thought he was. he's way too soft to ever seem like the original goods."

alarmed, luo binghe dispels the dream and steps out of it entirely. sure, he knows shen qingqiu's personality changed almost overnight when he had that qi deviation. everyone knew that. he avoided questioning it much, unwilling to look a gift horse in the mouth when it meant having a shizun that cared for him

but shang qinghua. shang qinghua seems to know something more about shen qingqiu's personality change. something he's not sharing. luo binghe didn't like the idea that one of his subordinates could be hiding something as vital as this from him

well, this had been a test of his spy's loyalties, hadn't it? perhaps he should make a visit to an ding. he had some questions.

[rustedhills]

Somewhat articulate Kris thoughts, ch. 3+4 edition. Heads-up for spoilers and discussion of the series' themes of familial abuse. And why "Kris is evil actually" sucks.

Man, the ending of ch. 4 is genuinely kind of heartbreaking, and even more terrible in a way than any of the others--because it's so obvious that Kris is just a kid dealing with way too much.

Beyond the Knight stuff, the delta warrior stuff, the prophecy... Kris is just the town weird kid who came home with a friend, saw their mom dancing wine-drunk with the convenience store guy (after an entire Divorce Gameshow Extravaganza and a Horrible Visit to Noelle's Household ft. her abusive mom ft. horrible soul hockey, not to mention all the exhausting darkworld adventuring), and who just has to deal with all that. Unrelated but someone noted that Susie saw a drunk parent and immediately left and I can't stop thinking about it.

Kris is pulling their soul out more and more--maybe we just haven't seen it until now, but it seems like they've had to do this for a while (Toriel mentions that Kris just runs the tap and acts chaotic on impulse sometimes, lol how quirky amirite anyways) and no-one has recognized or been able to help, except now Noelle (hopefully that proceeds well?). But of course, monsters don't have souls--and Kris needs a lot of help with a lot of things that their parents etc. just can't handle. Toriel checking out that book on human care so much speaks to that lack of resources / knowledge.

Even amongst their family, Asgore is a complete outcast, Asriel is away at college, and a lot of the adults in town are nice but ultimately unable to help them. Take away the fantasy, and you're left with a community of friendly but ineffectual guardians who can't--or won't--recognize that Kris is dealing with chronic mental and physical issues. Susie is the bad kid, Kris is a nobody, and Noelle is the nice girl. They all have to fight to be seen as anything other than the stereotypes people envision them as.

Maybe that's why the dark world is so fun(?) for Susie and Noelle--you can literally fight the things that hurt you. Lancer's dad sucks, so Susie gets to have her big arc by telling him off. Queen is controlling, so Noelle triumphantly says "no" to her. But Kris...?

HOLY [[Cungadero1997]]!!! KRIS, YOU [[little sponge]], YOU'RE FUCKED!!

Every character whose insecurity ties into Kris' own--Tenna's desperation as a tool turned to trash, trying to keep a drifting family together, Spamton's garbage life as a puppet controlled by a voice on the phone... they fucking fail. I think they're ok on some level? Even Berdly gets to have a more cathartic end-of-chapter arc than Kris!

Kris isn't Evil, or the ultimate secret bad guy, or whatever. They're a traumatized kid clinging to any guardian figure they have, even when that guardian is overly controlling and potentially abusive towards them, just so long as they promise a way out of the present situation. Especially Carol and Mike (if the voice on the phone is indeed Mike).

Like, with all the marionette strings and fucked up families in the previous chapters, it's safe to say that Kris is in a bad situation (thematically and narratively), and deserves empathy--even when / if they do hurt others. In the next few chapters, they'll likely lash out in some really nasty and terrible ways, but... so would a lot of people.

So would a lot of [[BIG SHOT]] [[puppets]]