#y2k2

[they-call-me-thewildrose]

How are we feeling folks?

[theosjunkdrawer]

I think evergiven and crowdstrike should kiss

[letoutthecrazy]

Darude Sandstorm plays in the background #y2k2

a failed update from billion-dollar cybersecurity firm crowdstrike has crashed windows machines worldwide today (july 19th 2024), leaving everything from airport terminals to checkout machines to delivery apps to banks stuck with a blue screen of death. here's a screenshot from downdetector (au) to illustrate:

the issue appears to be with crowdstrike falcon, a form of antivirus software widely used in the corporate world -- with emphasis on the world. there have been reports from the us, uk, australia, germany, india, france, japan and more. places affected include (but are not limited to) supermarkets, banks, basically every airline, public transport networks, major broadcasters, emergency services, corporate offices, healthcare providers and stock exchanges.

(woolies pic via archiestaines9 on twitter; s3pirion; akothari. yes that is masahiro sakurai of smash bros fame)

emergency service lines are currently experiencing problems within the american states of alaska, arizona, indiana, minnesota, new hampshire and ohio. similar problems likely plague other areas of the world, they just haven't been reported on yet. australian emergency services are operating, and critical infrastructure remains stable. be sure to check in with the local news stations still online for more updates.

welcome to y2k............................. 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[doerot]

Thank you global server outage I need to schedule a physical and you are making this very difficult

[foolondahill17]

Y2K2 electric boogaloo

[charlottessecretartstash]

Little photoshoot with Y2K2! He had a lovely time.

[hussyknee]

Alt text enabled

idk if people on tumblr know about this but a cybersecurity software called crowdstrike just did what is probably the single biggest fuck up in any sector in the past 10 years. it's monumentally bad. literally the most horror-inducing nightmare scenario for a tech company.

some info, crowdstrike is essentially an antivirus software for enterprises. which means normal laypeople cant really get it, they're for businesses and organisations and important stuff.

so, on a friday evening (it of course wasnt friday everywhere but it was friday evening in oceania which is where it first started causing damage due to europe and na being asleep), crowdstrike pushed out an update to their windows users that caused a bug.

before i get into what the bug is, know that friday evening is the worst possible time to do this because people are going home. the weekend is starting. offices dont have people in them. this is just one of many perfectly placed failures in the rube goldburg machine of crowdstrike. there's a reason friday is called 'dont push to live friday' or more to the point 'dont fuck it up friday'

so, at 3pm at friday, an update comes rolling into crowdstrike users which is automatically implemented. this update immediately causes the computer to blue screen of death. very very bad. but it's not simply a 'you need to restart' crash, because the computer then gets stuck into a boot loop.

this is the worst possible thing because, in a boot loop state, a computer is never really able to get to a point where it can do anything. like download a fix. so there is nothing crowdstrike can do to remedy this death update anymore. it is now left to the end users.

it was pretty quickly identified what the problem was. you had to boot it in safe mode, and a very small file needed to be deleted. or you could just rename crowdstrike to something else so windows never attempts to use it.

it's a fairly easy fix in the grand scheme of things, but the issue is that it is effecting enterprises. which can have a looooot of computers. in many different locations. so an IT person would need to manually fix hundreds of computers, sometimes in whole other cities and perhaps even other countries if theyre big enough.

another fuck up crowdstrike did was they did not stagger the update, so they could catch any mistakes before they wrecked havoc. (and also how how HOW do you not catch this before deploying it. this isn't a code oopsie this is a complete failure of quality ensurance that probably permeates the whole company to not realise their update was an instant kill). they rolled it out to everyone of their clients in the world at the same time.

and this seems pretty hilarious on the surface. i was havin a good chuckle as eftpos went down in the store i was working at, chaos was definitely ensuring lmao. im in aus, and banking was literally down nationwide.

but then you start hearing about the entire country's planes being grounded because the airport's computers are bricked. and hospitals having no computers anymore. emergency call centres crashing. and you realised that, wow. crowdstrike just killed people probably. this is literally the worst thing possible for a company like this to do.

crowdstrike was kinda on the come up too, they were starting to become a big name in the tech world as a new face. but that has definitely vanished now. to fuck up at this many places, is almost extremely impressive. its hard to even think of a comparable fuckup.

a friday evening simultaneous rollout boot loop is a phrase that haunts IT people in their darkest hours. it's the monster that drags people down into the swamp. it's the big bag in the horror movie. it's the end of the road. and for crowdstrike, that reaper of souls just knocked on their doorstep.

[broccoli-bitching]

y2k2

[severalowls]

y2k2 happened and planes fell out of the sky very gradually at controlled rates with their engines on and gear down at airports

[ultraultrarandomstuffhere]

Why have 100 years of history when you can cram it into 10

can we talk about how a broadcasted american presidential assassination attempt and Y2K happened not even a week apart

we don’t even live in interesting times anymore, we live in enthralling times

[megid0nt]

Good mornin glad y2k2 happened on my day off bc I would have been Even more insufferable about our overdependence on the software and services of others lol

[brainbleedo]

So was anyone going to tell me that we're having Y2K2 or was I just supposed to know this??

[artdunk]

die iphone

[blurbofparadise]

Y2K2 Electric Bugaloo

The year is 9999 and humanity has spread across the galaxy. But despite all the great advancements a certain group of people is in panic, scrambling to update all of humanity's systems to prepare for and prevent any incidents for the upcoming turn of the millennia to the year 10K.

[parkreiners]

THE WEEKLY EXPOSEUR ISSUE #255 ARTICLE #12: THE ONE CASE THEY CAN’T SOLVE. By Truman Scarborough.

It goes without saying that outside of the ongoing Civil-Corporate Conflict, the worst crimes in Carnelian could be barely listed on two hands. The Puzzle Box Frauds of 2209, the ‘Be Happy’ and ‘Y2K2′ mass hacking incidents, and the kidnapping of the world’s oldest baby are all almost farcical in nature, almost leaving the Ministry of Justice with little to do. More often than not, the bulk of their work has either been related to the above mentioned Civil-Corporate Conflict, the previously mentioned independent crimes (all of which were resolved in an orderly and peaceful manner), or to mysterious incidences relating to the supernatural forces that abound in this strange and still yet new world.

But, one case haunts both the nation and the Justice Ministry in particular: the Signpost Killings. Representing the only known incidence of serial murder in the nation, The Signpost Killings entail the deaths of more than twenty individuals, as well as related, unexplained incidents connected to, at least what authorities believe to be, a single individual. The story goes like this: starting in 2213 and ending in 2217, twenty-three people were murdered in and around the Four Cities Complex in all manner of disparate means. According to public records, none of the victims were aware of or directly connected to one another, all of whom came from drastically different backgrounds, most of whom sharing only the same general area of residence.

Now, dear reader, you may be asking yourselves “What connects these murders, if anything, to each other?” to which I would answer, “A few things, actually!”. Most notably, while the methods may have differed between each kill, the killer always seems to have struck when the victim was alone, and while each victim was killed in a different manner, the killer seems to have left two calling cards at each scene. One being a number, in the first victim’s case 01145, with the first two digits seeming ascending for each new victim and crime scene (i.e. the second scene featuring the number 02145, the third 03145, the fourth 04145, etc.), and the other being a series of numbered placards, spelling out a certain word. The first victim, Carnelian City shopkeeper Ed Bullock’s placards spelled out the word ‘lust’, and given that this was the first and most publicized killing, the names ‘the lust killer’ or more simply ‘lust’ stuck, even as later victims were associated with different words (e.g. smoke, electronics, etc.).

The 23rd and final murder, though announced, was the most mysterious of the killings, as it involved an individual directly involved with the investigation and apparently happened in an especially sensitive location. Thus, the only details that were made public were the time it occurred and the murder weapon, a hand-axe, though even minimal details such as the victim’s initials and the placards left at the scene of the crime were left out of the statement released to the public. Theories range from a major government building like the Mahogany House, or the residence of a major political leader, but no concrete information has surfaced. Additionally, after this murder, the investigations on the whole stalled indefinitely, only picking up when, a year later, the grave of former Justice Minister Lincoln Townsend was found defaced, this time with the numbers 24145, and waterlogged, despite there being no logical reason for such a thing to happen. While this wasn’t made public, a hidden source (possibly the legendary hacker, Ω), leaked one detail about the case to us: the placards this time seemed to spell out the word ‘temple’.

Curiously, the date of this discovery was included in the aforementioned leak by our anonymous source, leading us to find out that this occurred on August 28th, 2218, which is an auspicious date to be sure. If you’ve been living under a rock and don’t remember, this coincides with the date the resort island Isla Saturnalia sank into the upper Sundance Sea, injuring hundreds and destroying an entire resort town in the process. We’ve covered all sorts of theories related to this incident in the past, ranging from an ancient sea-god swallowing up the island because it tasted like sweet parfait, to it being a test for an experimental seismic weapon by a secret organization, but this is yet a new wrinkle in the case.

Additionally, it may be noteworthy to address the letters sent to the press (including this very magazine, dear reader!!!) by an individual named Locutus. While the Ministry of Justice doubts their authenticity as it pertains to whether or not these were sent by the same individual who committed the murders (if it even is a single individual), though they are of interest due to their own mysterious origins. Each letter taunted the police and the citizenry, calling them ‘unenlightened fools who could not see God if he spat in their face point blank’, and that ‘God’s harvest has begun’. That last statement is of great interest to many, who connected it to the infamous cult known as the Center of Rebirth, though none of the cult’s leaders responded for questioning then, nor did anyone speak out for or against it publicly.

Folks, it’s a real mystery as to the truth of this case, and we here at the Exposeur have no real clue as to who or what is perpetrating these crimes. The government has dragged their feet on this one, and though I am usually one to suggest incompetence over malignance, it feels especially galling knowing something like this hasn’t yet been fully addressed. The conspiracy around this case has many tendrils, and who knows how many of them come from the government themselves. In the end, all I can say, like I always have been, is Keep Your Eyes Peeled, To See the Truth and to Save Your Life.

[amarysue]

Anyone else excited for Y2K2: electric boogaloo?