thedorkdisorder

[thedorkdisorder]

No incentive

What is the point in going to work? We are given no incentive to do so. Unless you are highly educated and can get a high end career, or are willing to contort your life in ways that it should not manipulated, just to get a manager position, you will never earn enough to live an ok life in the UK. Low working class people are punished the most. Doesn’t matter how hard you try, how good of a job…

[thedorkdisorder]

Distrust in others

Not trusting others, being sceptical of someone’s intentions may not sound like a good way to live, but honestly, it’s protected me from a lot, there has been many occasions I have let my guard down and tried to trust only to have been screwed over really badly in the end. It’s lonely always keeping people at arms length and it most likely, one of the reasons I will never amount to any great…

[thedorkdisorder]

PTSD

I have a confession, I never been officially diagnosed with PTSD, it’s possible I don’t have it, but there’s certainly something lingering from my past. I believe there are a number of traumatic things from my past, if I am honest, that effect my life greatly, but it’s hard to tell which situation has caused which mental health problem. I’ve never actually received any treatment, other than…

[thedorkdisorder]

Their Brush with Death

Terrifying

[thedorkdisorder]

Dance like no ones Watching

I think I over think things sometimes but it does keep me safe #mentalhealth #overthinker

It’s a good feeling to dance, when the music is right and your in the right atmosphere, nothing can feel better. You can loose yourself so much, that even the pain you live with, be it mental or physical, leaves your body, even if only for a moment. I had the joy of feeling that bliss the other night. Although night’s out aren’t really my scene, it was such a nice change of pace, and felt great…

[thedorkdisorder]

School Holidays

Just over a week left of the school holidays. I can’t even tell if it has gone quickly or slowly, it’s all just been a messy chaotic blur. I am hoping once the kids go back to school I can pull focus again and start getting some sort of post plan/ schedule in place and my blog has been so badly neglected. It’s sucked, this has been the first holidays where we have really felt the pinch for…

[thedorkdisorder]

Rare night out

I went on a very rare, night out. Oooooo

Oh my days…. I really pushed myself out of the comfort zone yesterday, which has been both good and bad for me. To begin with, Little has a boyfriend, she’s only 6, so it’s just her best friend. His mum was the first to reach out, obviously, not in a mean way but I was never going to try and connect with another parent at the school. Anyway as uncomfortable as it has been I have been leasing…

[thedorkdisorder]

Frustration

Sorry, it's been a while.

Let me start by apologising for my absence as of late. It’s been a hard and frustrating few weeks, which has had a knock on effect. I’ve been feeling really unwell but can’t really explain how. There have been some bad fibro flare ups, migraines, bouts of anxiety and fatigue, but there’s something else that I can only describe as being unwell. I am assuming it’s stress. For starters, Hubs has…

[thedorkdisorder]

My Sister

This is a big rant hard to put into words. But I needed to let some of it out. #mentalhealth #trauma #familyproblems #depression #anxiety

I wonder…. How can a psychologist give an accurate diagnosis without character reference from an outside source. This has sprung to mind because my older sister, who in recent years has caused all manner of chaos across the family, has popped up out of no where and sent a snarky message to my mum about how she has been diagnosed with all manner of mental health conditions, which I am not…

[thedorkdisorder]

Close call

Treassure the people you know

It’s hard to do, but I feel like people need to slow down and give more time for each other. You never know what is going to happen to someone regardless of age or if they have medical problems. Recently, my auntie T was found to have had a blood clot on the brain, not just small one, it was huge. It was shocking to find out, I see her daily on the school run, as she still has young children who…

[thedorkdisorder]

Proving Useful

I've been putting my own things to one side to try and put myself out there. I don't know if that's the right choice but it's nice to not feel worthless. #mentalhealth #communitywork #personalblog #blogger #peronallife #volunteer

My recent engagement with the community groups may have effected my own personal projects, but I have been working hard to prove the potential usefulness of my age group recently. So as I have said in a recent post, I have made it onto the committee of the community Gardens. I don’t believe me and Vanessa where brought in because they believed we where going to be useful but I have been blowing…

[thedorkdisorder]

Community Changes

It’s been a mind boggling couple of week and although it has been a lot to take in at it has really sapped all of my energy, it’s all been for goo reasons. A couple of weeks back was the Annual General Meeting (AGM) for the Gardens. This is for the Committee, their main funder and the plot holders to attend. There was a plan to get Vanessa onto the Committee, what I wasn’t expecting in any way…

[thedorkdisorder]

Work, Life, Money, Work Balance

Currently annoyed about the illusion of "Work Life Money Balance" as Hubs is expected to do more, work longer for no extra pay. #rant #personalblog #blogger #worklifebalance #welfare #stress

Yeah I put work in there twice and you’ll understand why soon. I’m just going to start by saying that although I know that in todays world traditional gender roles are out the window and we can all be who we want now, for the sake of saving confusion I am just going to use old school language of like, the man “being the bread winner” and the woman being the “homemaker” just to save on…

[thedorkdisorder]

Fibromyalgia: Weight Gain

It's hard for me to see the benefits of Medication when all it does it cause my rapid weight gain. #medication, #fibromyalgia #depression #mentalhealth #anxiety #weightgain #sideeffects

1 stone in 1 month. I have gained one whole stone in a month without any changes to my diet or exercise. The only thing different is that I have been on this new Medication, Venlafaxine. It’s not just the medication that does it, I just seem to have those kind of genetics that likes to take any opportunity to gain weight. Walk a bit less than usual? Gain a few pounds. Weight gain a side effect?…

[thedorkdisorder]

Small Break

Hello, sorry, I’ve not been posting much. Aside from being a bit mentally numb recently, it’s also been a two week half term break for the kids, so that’s draining my energy, and here in the UK we are in the middle of a heat wave which has my brain fried. To add to that it’s been Big’s birthday, and I’ve not managed to make it as special as I had hoped. We did manage to go on a little camping…

[thedorkdisorder]

Pets

Do you have any pets. Meet mine. #pets #cats #blog #personalblog #furbaby #ilovemypets

Pets! Pets are awesome and I believe are as much of a necessity to have at least once in your life, more so than kids to be honest. Not saying I love my pets more than my kids, just that they provide you with a kind of companionship humans can not. They love unconditionally if you are willing to show them that love too, and have surprising personalities, even fish do. I have 3 pets, A Corn snake…

[thedorkdisorder]

The past Week

Exhausted isn't even the word.

Not typed in a little while. Just been majorly tired recently, extremely lethargic, every time I even thought of it, the thought has been exhausting. I have made notes to myself to remind me what I have done in the past week, when I read it back, it does make sense why I would be so burnt out, especially for someone like me. It’s been especially difficult because my hands have been swelling up a…