Welcome to the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council - In Your Best Interest. Please be sure to make sure your wizard licence is renewed, your wizard taxes are filed quarterly, and you have your wizard insurance up to date. ALL APPRENTICES MUST BE REGISTERED WITHIN THIRTY DAYS! All paperwork must be filed in person in triplicate - no electronic delivery. Contacting this council here does not guarantee a response, plus we type slowly. Magic is our highest order but bureaucracy is our second. Efficency does not equal results, and we aim for results. Our hats are bigger than your hats, we guarantee it. Ask about the next skeleton wars. NO BEAR MAGIC!
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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Wizard Council Bulletin Five
Announcement!
This Wizard Council is currently looking for unpaid interns to join from far off lands, and eventually upon reaching full wizard status, opening your own Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council - In your Best Interest in your own village.
As of such, you will reap the profi- I mean benefits of having your own minions and free labor leaving you to wallow in excess and enjoy the finer roasted meats and naps that all great wizards with the tallest, pointiest hats should want. You will collect taxes, and have the great honor of only paying 10% of all collections as a franchise fee.
Inquires will be taken in person at the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council - In Your Best Interest only, please arrive in person to make an appointment to inquire. Do not come at any scheduled meal times, and be dressed appropriately. Remember to bow swiftly to ME, Head Wizard REDACTED and be ready to show your spell stuff.
Afterwards we will contemplate orbs and eat the finest foods that we wrenched from our poor farmers hands with the promise of gold.
Head Wizard REDACTED : Unpaid Intern
Unpaid Intern here. They told me that they would teach me about magic and power. Now I am stuck in a contract full of cleaning and servitude, and I will not be taught magic for at least my first year. Send help, and by help I mean toffee snacks to bribe the wizards with.
Head Wizard REDACTED here, insolent interns will be disintegrated. Also, looking for new interns, inquire within. Also, send toffee snacks. WE ARE NOT CORRUPT!
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Oh no, I’ve been combobulated. As an unpaid intern, I was already discombobulated, so now that I got that sorted out, maybe I’ll make apprentice sooner than I thought? Thank you!
Wizard Council Bulletin Three
Blog Tax
In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.
If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.
In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.
In conclusion, PAY TAXES!
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Terribly sorry, in person only. If you send a messenger, they must not be affiliated with the wizard council as I am.
-The Unpaid Intern
Wizard Council Bulletin Three
Blog Tax
In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.
If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.
In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.
In conclusion, PAY TAXES!
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Well, we only really have jurisdiction over our immediate brick and mortar realm, but in the event someone was to join digitally, and we could possibly start to branch out through digital means. Currently, as an unpaid intern, I have no authority. If you do want to make an appointment to ask these questions in person, please come in person to make that appointment so you can make an appointment. Glad to be able to clear this up for you.
Wizard Council Bulletin Two
Disintegration Clarification
Disintegration will be used by the council and authorized council members who pay taxes and are on official business for the council as evidenced by a written document signed, sealed, and delivered.
Disintegration will be used in the event of:
-failure to pay taxes
-failure to have current wizard insurance
-bear magic
-failure to adhere to the wizard code
-rampaging apprentices
-tomfoolerey, clowning, capering, pranks, skylarking, buffonery, harlequinade, horseplay, and general mischief
-disrespectful interactions with other wizards as determined by the council
-skeleton wars
-harassing any sentient being without proper consent
-playing dice in the alley behind the council building
-unsanctioned wizard games
-not wearing a tall, pointy hat in the presence of a wizard council member
-activities unbecoming a wizard at the discretion of the officers and head wizard of the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council, In your Best Interest.
Please be advised that the wizard code will be digitized in the future, until that time please refer to your paper copies at their last update.
You can request a paper copy but must send your own messenger or pick it up in person after making an appointment, also in person.
This list may change without notice.
Nothing wrong with anything this list, in fact I love skylarking and buffoonery. I also love disintegration... zap, pop, and poof! No, don't type that they will think we are inept or corrupt. We are definitely not corrupt. Seriously though, I am just an unpaid intern, so really nobody reads these and I am the only one who reads the comments. We don't even know how to queue properly yet.
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Wizard Council Bulletin Two
Disintegration Clarification
Disintegration will be used by the council and authorized council members who pay taxes and are on official business for the council as evidenced by a written document signed, sealed, and delivered.
Disintegration will be used in the event of:
-failure to pay taxes
-failure to have current wizard insurance
-bear magic
-failure to adhere to the wizard code
-rampaging apprentices
-tomfoolerey, clowning, capering, pranks, skylarking, buffonery, harlequinade, horseplay, and general mischief
-disrespectful interactions with other wizards as determined by the council
-skeleton wars
-harassing any sentient being without proper consent
-playing dice in the alley behind the council building
-unsanctioned wizard games
-not wearing a tall, pointy hat in the presence of a wizard council member
-activities unbecoming a wizard at the discretion of the officers and head wizard of the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council, In your Best Interest.
Please be advised that the wizard code will be digitized in the future, until that time please refer to your paper copies at their last update.
You can request a paper copy but must send your own messenger or pick it up in person after making an appointment, also in person.
This list may change without notice.
Nothing wrong with anything this list, in fact I love skylarking and buffoonery. I also love disintegration... zap, pop, and poof! No, don't type that they will think we are inept or corrupt. We are definitely not corrupt. Seriously though, I am just an unpaid intern, so really nobody reads these and I am the only one who reads the comments. We don't even know how to queue properly yet.
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Wizard Council Bulletin Four
Announcement from the Head Wizard
It has come to my attention that an unpaid intern took it upon themselves to publish many an opinion on this blog. As such, now I, Head Wizard REDACTED will be overseeing this council more thoroughly in the interwebs and this unpaid intern will lose snacks as a reprimand but will continue to manage these announcements and declarations. It’s so hard to find a good intern.
In addition, our inquisitors will be seeking wizard blogs from this point forward and contacting them about their nonpayment of taxes. Failure to pay taxes will result in DISINTEGRATION.
As for all that has been said about this council, we are truly not corrupt. It says it right in the name. We are here to help, and to engage with all of you for the furthering of wizardry. Of course, that comes at a cost and our support in the next SKELETON WARS does not come cheap. Having us on retainer, as it were, is the most sensible option in these uncertain times. Just the other day, a young wizard apprentice was disintegrated for causing a panic and a stir in the council. The surrounding town almost erupted in violence, until in our wisdom we took it upon ourselves to dispatch his roguish ways in the most public of spectacles… in your best interest of course.
Pay taxes, and don’t get disintegrated. It is a terrible way to go.
Head Wizard REDACTED:Unpaid Intern
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I do like buffets!
Wizard Council Bulletin Three
Blog Tax
In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.
If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.
In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.
In conclusion, PAY TAXES!
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Finally a wizard wants to teach me something! Does this make me an apprentice?
Wait. I’m sorry, I can not accept your offer to be your apprentice. I have a duty ::hehehe:: to my council, no matter how terrible they are.
Thank you though!
Wizard Council Bulletin Three
Blog Tax
In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.
If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.
In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.
In conclusion, PAY TAXES!
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Well… I am an unpaid intern. I haven’t quite got the hubris. Got the whimsy though… childish is like whimsical, right?
Wizard Council Bulletin Three
Blog Tax
In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.
If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.
In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.
In conclusion, PAY TAXES!
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It’s got to be better than latrine duty. Duty. Doodie.
Wizard Council Bulletin Three
Blog Tax
In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.
If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.
In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.
In conclusion, PAY TAXES!
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Our head wizard has a gas and it smells like meat and rotten cheese. What’s a war crime?
Wizard Council Bulletin Three
Blog Tax
In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.
If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.
In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.
In conclusion, PAY TAXES!
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Intern Sausage?
Wizard Council Bulletin Three
Blog Tax
In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.
If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.
In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.
In conclusion, PAY TAXES!
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Yes, all of this wizard council's plans are bad...
-Unpaid Intern
Wizard Council Bulletin Three
Blog Tax
In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.
If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.
In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.
In conclusion, PAY TAXES!
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Unpaid intern to unpaid intern, I do feel we are often forced to do tasks that we may not agree with. I'm all for the occasional tax, just to keep food on the table in the council, but I see no reason to ask for taxes from non-council members. Also, I only get a short amount of time to type, I have to polish the orbs in a little bit, and then clean all 27 latrines in this tower. They haven't even taught me TIOLET BOILET to clean them with magic... but if I run now I have the chance to be disintegrated. Choose your internship wisely I guess.
Wizard Council Bulletin Three
Blog Tax
In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.
If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.
In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.
In conclusion, PAY TAXES!
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My good @the-gnomish-bastard, as an unpaid intern, I have no authority to collect taxes. I am sure this is not going to go anywhere, and is just a weekly newsletter to make the head wizard of this council feel important. Of course, if you choose violence, please spare the interns.
Wizard Council Bulletin Three
Blog Tax
In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.
If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.
In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.
In conclusion, PAY TAXES!
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Honestly, as an unpaid intern, I am not going to do anything. Plus, all disintegrations happen in person because they don't know how to cast a spell that isn't in person... so nothing probably.
Wizard Council Bulletin Three
Blog Tax
In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.
If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.
In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.
In conclusion, PAY TAXES!
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