ultimatereyesstan

[ultimatereyesstan]

New account!

Hi everyone! I never really use this account and I want a fresh start (also I cant reset the password so I can only use this acc on one browser???) If you want to keep in touch, follow me @lilacswraith I’m in all the same fandoms + a few more!

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how the frickity frackity floppity fuck does sims custom content work because i want it and i am failing! -sincerely someone who got the game yesterday.

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war doesn't determine who's right. war determines who remains

The Poppy War, R.F. Kuang

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sinegard rivalry

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Art by Sam Yang

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Art by Ungfio

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Fang Runin: *exists* Me:

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this is exactly how the book went

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the crows + incorrect quotes [insp.]

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Between all the Hargreeves how many braincells do you think they have floating around between the 7 of them? I like to think they share probably 3, maybe 4 on a good day.

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I really hope they use alternative!Reginald to their advantage this season, since in S1 he was limited solely to flashbacks and that one heaven-barbershop scene with Klaus. Even in S2 he was quite limited to the whole JFK situation. So having him be his own present entity this season will so be bizarre after only seeing him through the guise of being dead and shown in flashbacks and being in the past before the Academy.

Will his monocle come back into play like it does in the comics? Will we get to see how he trained the others beyond Vanya and Klaus? Does he still act similar to how he was with the Umbrellas only now with the Sparrows? How and why did he build Hotel Oblivion? How much advanced technology, like his flying ship we got a glimpse of in the pilot opening when he flew over Russia to get Vanya, and does he have even more since he isn't dead in this timeline? How did he find out about the apocalypse in the original timeline and if he didn't create the Academy/gather the children for that then why did he?

I hate Reginald so much but by god is he a deep pit of questions and confusion to be answered this season. As much as a like to give space to interpret, I really hope we get answers about his knowledge and maybe even if the whole Klaus grave theory is true then we could see the original Reginald again if ghosts/the barbershop/heaven aren't affected by the timelines changing?

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The Fan Narrative of Klaus’ Siblings Bearing Responsibility for his Addiction

You know the one.  “If Klaus’ siblings knew how much he suffered, they would be kinder to him and respect him more, and he wouldn’t need the drugs!”

Or.

“If Klaus’ siblings were there for him and knew how much he suffered, he wouldn’t be on the street and they would be taking care of him!”

This is really an innocent way of looking at it.  As far as I can tell, it’s never said by people who have experience with addiction.  It’s not a deliberate or malicious spread of misinformation, and I’m really glad Klaus humanizes addiction for so many people.  But it is misguided, and I want to address it because I know some people who think this way are going to have loved ones with substance use issues in the future, and I want them to know in advance that this is a dangerous expectation to have of yourself or others in real life.

I talk a lot about codependency, and it’s something I struggle with myself, but not because of an addicted loved one.  I am the addicted loved one.  Therefore, I’m going to rely mostly on other voices to describe this for me.

First of all, the idea that none of Klaus’ siblings tried to help him is very improbable.  Obviously, Ben is the one everyone knows about, but we can see that this has led to Ben getting incredibly fucked up by it.  Klaus was living in the Academy for the first years of his addiction.  If nothing else, Luther would have felt tasked with trying to help him because he’s the leader and this is his team that he’s responsible for.

The reality is that addiction is a family-wide disease. It’s a cliché in the recovery world. If you want to know what it’s really like, here is an entire page of stories from the siblings of addicts and alcoholics.

Second, it was never their responsibility to begin with. In fact, the idea that a loved one can control an addiction is science fiction.  So much so that the creed of Al-Anon (apart from the Serenity Prayer, obviously) is “I did not cause it, I cannot control it, and I cannot cure it.” There are techniques families can use to motivate an addict to want to get sober, but they are never a sure bet, they’re not very well-known, and they are not the same thing as the family being to blame for the addiction or responsible for managing it.

Finally, addicts are really fucking hard to live with, and loved ones have few resources to cope.  Al-Anon tells you about “loving detachment,” but that’s fucking impossible sometimes.  Other people tell you to show tough love, kick them out of your life, and let them hit rock bottom, but statistically speaking, this actually makes the addiction worse, though it can mitigate some harm done to the rest of the family.  It can still feel impossible when it’s someone you love, especially your child.  Rather than get into detail because this isn’t my area of experience, I’m just gonna leave a few links on this one.

5 Main Reasons Why Addicts Manipulate

Siblings Also Struggle when Addiction Strikes a Family

Letting Go with Love: the Sister of an Addict’s Story

Gaslighting and Manipulation – This lady is amazing.  I adore how she shows clips not of family members, but of actual addicts talking about using these techniques.

Why do addicts and alcoholics hurt the ones they love? – Same lady, gets into the biology of why it’s so hard for addicts to have emotional connections with other people while they are in active addiction.  If you’ve wondered why Klaus’ empathy opens up so much when he gets sober, watch this video.

What is Codependency? – Specifically great for Ben and Klaus’ relationship.  Dr. Grande succinctly says it in many fewer words than I ever have.  He also gives an excellent definition of “enabling.”

Three links between trauma and addiction – One more from Put the Shovel Down.

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klaus s3

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#yougoraven

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Sawtooth Blackberry

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I don’t take hints. Throw a rock at me

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HELLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OMG IM ALIVE