usualstranger

[usualstranger]

i have a parcel to get at a local store, time to take off the nail polish & round glasses so i am ✨a plausibly deniable gay✨, hopefully seeming queer enough to not look 14 yet not so much that i get weird stares and comments on it

[usualstranger]

sometimes self-care is stabbing your father 27 times in the chest with the nearest kitchen knife and i think we should normalise that

[usualstranger]

me : am I being clingy and off-putting and in a way that will make them hate me and leave me forever, or is it just anxiety ?

*mountains of past evidence of anxiety looking exactly like this, over and over again*

me : I guess ill never know until they answer my text. either with a very normal, regular answer as they hadn't even noticed what I see as a deathly, unforgivable flaw of my character, or with a message of deep hatred followed by abandonment. because those two are equally likely possibilities.

[usualstranger]

Uh- are you aware of the meaning of proship?

Proship has never meant anything except a combination of three ideas:

Ship and let ship (your ships don't harm me and vice-versa) and YKINMK (your kink is not my kink, and that's okay; my kink stories don't harm you and vice-versa)

Harassment over fiction is not acceptable

Censorship of fiction is not acceptable either

Any other definitions are made by antis, not proshippers, and are an attempt at revisionism to justify harassment based on false claims.

[usualstranger]

there’s this extremely kind soul of a woman on instagram that makes accessible recipes that don’t require standing, chopping, or a stove and she might just have a permanent place in my heart

[usualstranger]

drinking water when I have a headache should give instant relief. it should go away. what's even the point of drinking water if it can't do that

[usualstranger]

one of my most firmly held beliefs is there's no such thing as an inappropriate book for a kid and people try to debate me saying like buhhhhhh I shouldnt have been reading the things I did when I was a kid and it's like cool but did you die??? did anything bad happen to you?? or were you allowed to think about what you did and didn't know and walk away when something got too intense or whatever.

[usualstranger]

[usualstranger]

[usualstranger]

god. janus sanders really is a character of all time, just in terms of concept. when you were a little kid, you did something wrong, and you got so scared of getting in trouble that another little guy was born inside you. and he loves you. and he wants you to stay safe. so he tells you to lie now, take care of yourself now, keep yourself safe. but all the other little guys inside you hate him. he's too mean, too selfish. the little guy that was born from your desire to do good and be good hates him the most, because you're a little catholic boy, and lying is bad. and you're a good boy. so everything inside you that isn't good has to be shut away.

he knows he's not wanted. he creates his own place to stay, a hidden corner where he can't hurt you. because all the others say that he'll end up hurting you, and he can see how scared you are of being a liar, so he lets himself be forgotten. hidden away. this is how he shows his love: by hiding himself, and every subsequent unwanted part that grows inside you, from you. if knowing about their existence is too difficult for you, then he'll hide them all. he loves you. you don't even know his name.

he watches you grow, still unaware of his existence. the others make their presence known, felt. you let them take the reigns, most of the time. he sneaks in his own little influence here and there; small, harmless lies, only when necessary, so you won't even notice. and in the meantime, he acts as a herder of sorts for all the other parts of yourself that you've subconsciously cast away. he keeps them in line. he sympathizes with them, yes, he knows what it's like to be unwanted. but letting you see them would hurt you, and he loves you. so he keeps them there, in the shadow, unknown and unseen, just like him.

one of them, one of his little dark, unwanted things, doesn't want to be hated anymore. he wants to make himself known. he wants a seat at the table. and, in an ultimate slap to the face for janus, he gets it. virgil gets everything that janus was denied from the start. acceptance. power. control. his effort is acknowledged, his necessity is embraced. he gets a seat at the table. he doesn't have to hide anymore. and janus can't help but resent him for that. maybe it's a good thing, then, that the hatred is mutual. not even his own cattle, the ones he kept safe, the ones he kept out of thomas' way, can stand his presence. fine. none of it matters. as long as you're safe, it was all worth it. he loves you. you still don't even know his name.

janus was always thomas' protector. even when none of it was ever seen or acknowledged.

i find his mixed motif really interesting too, because before we knew his name, we only knew him as deceit. the snake. the ancient serpent deceiver, the biblical snake of eden. but then we hear his name. janus. ianus bifrons, two-faced janus, god of beginnings, passage, transitions. i think that his name being revealed was very much the start of thomas beginning to see janus for who he actually is, instead of the heavily modified version of him that he's been seeing, courtesy of his catholic upbringing.

[usualstranger]

Date Everything is just ridiculous… 💕

[usualstranger]

it's genuinely bullshit that you should be required to own a mobile phone for participation in literally any aspect of life

[usualstranger]

do u ever get sad bc you're aro & uninterested in being part of a couple & you love a lot of people so so much

but then they talk about their plus one to an event and you know youll never be anyone's plus one to anything cause you know

youll never be part of a relationship deemed important enough to be the 'main one'

no matter how much you love someone and choose them over and over as the most important person in your life

and u cant even really be mad cause theyre happy and in love and it s a good thing

but still

anyway am i alone in this?

[usualstranger]

stop staring at my eyes

but not in an autism way

i spent time and money on my outfit and tattoos i need you to appreciate it, that s the part of me that matters

[usualstranger]

its so hot today

im gonna go fight the sun

i have tons of candles, ill make myself wax wings and go 1v1 the bastard

[usualstranger]

Harvard University

launched a free college course online that covers basic U.S. Government, understanding the constitution and how to recognize a dictatorship takeover.

Here is the link to the free course "We the People: Civic Engagement in a Constitutional Democracy"

https://pll.harvard.edu/course/we-people-civic-engagement-constitutional-democracy.

We understand that the current catalog of FREE COURSES at Harvard is being EXTENSIVELY EXPANDED, so you'll want to check their website from time to time to see which new courses are being added.

Government Courses | Harvard University