-gonebeyond - Tumblr blog

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Sometimes, I think my being is only relevant when I'm compensating for someone else's misplaced feelings. Selfish to say I guess, but I haven't felt like I've impacted anyone that doesn't remind them of someone else. Every relationship I've observed an array of lingering emotions but I just wait it out. Its not till you decide to leave that people miss you. That's where it gets weird. You become the reference person to which they subconsciously live out their lives and mention on occasion. I didn't offer anything intellectual startling to anyone. Everyone's obsessed with some emotion turmoil and pin it on someone. "This person made me feel this <insert emotion>" I made a lot of people better about themselves and their various situation because by majority no one really has a legitimate problem; they're just obsessed with romanticized and stagnate ideas. But me, who I am essentially, is not who they're in love with at all.

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Rokutaku

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One should make his decisions within the space of seven breaths.

Yamamoto Tsunetomo (via heartmindawakening)

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No Strings by Mayer Hawthorne

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Re-Siege The Throne (ft. Sean Boog) by Chuuwee

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When someone is searching then it might easily happen that the only thing his eyes still see is that what he searches for, that he is unable to find anything, to let anything enter his mind, because he always thinks of nothing but the object of his search, because he has a goal, because he is obsessed by the goal. Searching means: having a goal. But finding means: being free, being open, having no goal. You, oh venerable one, are perhaps indeed a searcher, because, striving for your goal, there are many things you don’t see, which are directly in front of your eyes.

Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse (via whisperingsurf)

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An Empty Shell.

Life feels meaningless. My attachment is toward my duty , but what other reason is there to validate my existence. I feel selfish needing some sort of validation, however it has come to the point where everyday brings me to the brink of destruction. I wish to destroy my self. I wish not to want. But still I want more. I WANT. I despise my self for every time I've given into want. Its an endless chase toward an invalid existence for desire derives from emptiness and I stress because I feel alone. Everyone feels alone. Loneliness is the absence of love. However, doesn't this corrupt the core idea of love? To love because you are lonely. To love because it validates existence. It's no wonder I feel used. It's no wonder I gave up. Such paradox. Love is selfless when indeed it is selfish. At least the modern idea of it. I love the people that I serve and those I protect, but not to validate my self, but to sacrifice my self. Death awaits me in the end, but again what validates my existence beyond service and sacrifice? I am truly selfish for I am alone because I do not love my self. I am beyond my self and if I am truly empty, than am I not dead? Who am I and why do I still love?

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Jimmy

I love you

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Living Legends - Moving At the Speed of Life

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dirtyscarab:

Magoshi

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“The mind has accumulated the dust of experiences and created our adult personality. But the Heart has remained the same, the child of God, the child of the Beloved.”

Aziz Kristof, Transmission of Awakening (via oceanofmind)