22-02-2024

[22-02-2024]

Baby, do you remember our first trip together? For a whole WEEEEEK :3 it was our first time together to travel aboard. We met the chonky kitties across the street from the café we were hanging at. And we also met a horsie! I couldn’t pronounce his name so I just called him… Frank. And I also named the plant sitting next to you at the café with the same name I called the horse with…. Heheheh it was all so silly. But me happiiiiiii thank you for taking me to Switzerland… it was a very memorable time for me. Let’s do visit it again later, okay? :3

Anyways, not long after we arrived back from our snowy adventure, you confessed to me o: hehehe I remember I said “Is there anything more you would like to tell me?” you said yes, and you end up telling me everything about the feeling you had been hiding the whole time. I must say it took me by surprise, and I thought it was probably because of the time we spent together. Or maybe it was just because the way I kissed you, the way I touched you. But you made sure it was none about that, you convinced me that the feelings emerged from your heart because you fell in love with me… just me. I heard you say ‘I love you’ for the first time and I couldn’t remember a happier time in my life.

But you asked me to wait to make it official, you said you wanted to make it more proper. You’re so cute. Little did you know I would have said yes too if you asked me right away that night.

On exactly today last year, 22 February 2023, you officially asked me to be your girlfriend. It still feels like it was just yesterday to me. I can still feel the butterflies in my stomach. You made me the happiest woman, the happiest I’ve ever been. From that day until today, until now, I’m still at my happiest with you. I will forever be happy, as long as I’m with you.

Happy first anniversary to us, my Jongwon… oh, it’s been hundred of days, countless hours with you. It has been such a long journey for us both, and I wouldn’t have traded it with anything this world has to offer.

My love, I would like to take you back in time to see how far we’ve become. Let’s take a trip back to a year ago, shall we? <3

[22-02-2024]

FEBRUARY, 2023.

It was later in February, some time after we made it official when I was feeling a little bored at my place, so I asked if we could spend some nights at your apartment. Hehe you took me to the market you usually shop at, and you took me to get some street foods :3 your favorite café to hang out, and the photo studio. I didn’t know you print the pictures you have taken all by yourself. It’s insane the way everybody knows you, from the shopkeepers, the baristas, the lady at the street food stalls.. you seem close with them. I love the way you treat them with kindness.

[22-02-2024]

MARCH, 2023.

I think I love your place a little too well. It had been around three days since I had been staying at your apartment, and I just found it so cozy to live in. I still think the same until now.

The first day of March, in the evening we just got back from street food-ing that day (I really love corndogs) and when we arrived back at your place, you had to pick up a call from your manager. So I waited for you in the living room. At first I was just watching some videos on YouTube but oh I didn’t know where did this weird feeling come from but suddenly I felt... sad? I couldn't express nor say it properly. When you finally finished with your call, I just went right clinging onto you. I sat there on your lap, hugging you close, breathe in your scent. And suddenly I just cried… WAH it was embarrassing and I think it was the first time you saw me cry, ever. And certainly that wasn’t the last heheheh. You asked me what was wrong, but I wasn’t ready to tell you.. to say it all out. You didn’t force me to do nor say anything after, you just sat there in silence, rubbing my back, and brushing my hair. Whispering sweet things in my ear, despite not knowing what was happening.

I finally calmed down a little after a while. I told you that this feeling I shared with you was so unfamiliar… you had been showing me a great amount of genuine love, that I had never felt in so long. You showed me colors I could never see with anyone else. But there was this insecurity in me… voices in my head that tell me you’d be gone in days.. weeks.. just like the others. I told you I’m used to everything being temporary, and I thought it was foolish to cry and tell you all about that… I never cared about those who left, but when it comes to you I can’t help to do anything but cry. I cared too much about you, about us… hence the tears. I love you so much, I think I just didn’t want to lose you… I couldn’t lose you.

You comforted me that night, telling me you won’t go anywhere.

Some days after that, you took me to your horse riding lesson; a preparation to film Knight Flower. You asked me if I wanted to try but I wasn’t feeling well that day, so I stayed by the bleachers. I asked what’s the horse’s name, you told me his name is Bada. Bada means sea if I’m not mistaken. I asked you again what would you name the horse if you could. You said you’d like to name it with Yonggam.

“His name is Bada, it means sea. But Yonggam is much better.”

Aaaaand two weeks later, we adopted a baby corgi and named him Yonggam. Life is full of surprise, indeed. But I���m ready to face anything as long as you’re by my side. I still remember the very first day you brought Gamgam home in a basket. He was smeeping like a baby. He’s definitely our baby.

[22-02-2024]

Silly little.

[22-02-2024]

APRIL, 2023.

April came in a swift motion, it was blooming season. Flowers were everywhere. I could find myself cheering up at every sight of those blooming petals on the streets, and I’m glad I was given the chance to share it with you. I usually celebrate my birthday with friends, we would be staying up late until morning but last year, I just wanted it to be private. I wanted it to be just us. You took me to do my favorite thing ever: hotel staycation. Once again, you showered me with surprises and gifts. Hehe you bought me a purse :3 it’s my favorite now. You wrote me a letter too… a literal handwritten letter heheheheheh that’s so cheesy but I love it the most. I still have it archived, you know. I love you so much.

Days passed, and I don’t know why I hit another breakdown yet again… doubts, fears, you name it. But you never get tired, never run out of patience to let me know how much you love me. You told me that no relationship is perfect, ever, but you’ll try your best to make me happy. I promised I’ll try my best too.

A week after that, you took me with you to your first LP DJ-ing gig. I remember a really wide smile was painted on my face when I see you were doing your thing up there. You seemed so invested in it, and I admire the way you handled everything well. You did a good job, Wonni. Ever thought about a career switch? Hehehe.

[22-02-2024]

MAY, 2023.

I think hotel staycation has been our monthly routine. We went for another getaway early in May, and oh little did I know you had another surprise for me. Baby, we just went back to our room after a very long (and heated.. hehe) session in the swimming pool. We had our hot bath and had ourselves comfortable in our matching Pika pjs :3 I think you ordered us a room service dinner that night. I was busy eating our meal when you got down on one knee, asking for my hand in marriage. I was so extremely happy that night… of course I said yes, I would be insane if I do otherwise. I froze for a moment after you confessed, which you mistook as a rejection :( you even asked me “did I choose the wrong timing?” but nooooo baby I was just taken aback. We had known each other for long, we started seeing each other for long and you have memorized my cats’ names so long ago but we just started dating for less than three months and it made me wonder, are you for real? Do you really want me?

I think I have told you about my marriage plan.. which is none hehe. But then I met you and you actually want me in that kind of way… it makes me rethink about my life choices. I froze there with you down on your knees in our matching pjs… HAHAHAHAH it was funny actually but so romantic…. So sweet, it’s so us. You told me you just couldn’t wait any longer, you want me and only me. From that moment in my life, I knew what I wanted. I wanted to be with you too. I can only see my life with you.

[22-02-2024]

Me giggling nonstop after having the ring on my finger.

[22-02-2024]

JUNE, 2023.

June was the month I went back to my forte… as in playing sims BECAUUUSSEEEE I just found a way to crack the DLCs :3 and by cracking the DLCs I mean is using Xuxi’s credit card to buy them all because what do you mean I gotta pay $1200+++ to enjoy all the contents… NO. Anyways I introduced you to Jim Pickens heheheh. I just realized that Sims Gallery can be accessed by all users worldwide and SOMEONE deadass created a Jim sim hahahah there’s no way I won’t download it. I think I have told you that my Jim lives in a smol cottage with his raccoon pet… HAHAHA the raccoon in Sims behaves the exact same way with cattos!! o: and my Jim is currently learning magic like.. wig. I just made him walk past the waterfall and turned out it was the gate to the magical realm hahaha. I want him to be an evil wizard :3

Later on, you asked me if I was ready to move in with you.. you asked me to live together with you. I mean, you had spent around less than a month at my place, not that I minded it but I just thought you were just messing around when you said “Maybe I should move in here.” But I guess you were being veeerrryyyy serious about it. But hey, here comes the plot twist: you asked me to move in with you instead. I told you I have five cats and they’ll have to come with us, and you didn’t mind at all waahhh I love you so much I was so glad to hear that. And so, we began to live together since then <3

Anyways, we visited your parent’s house in June too… you told them in person about our news…… hehehehehehehe they told me the ring was beautiful, too. Eomma looked so excited and couldn’t believe her last son would be the first one to make a move. She wished her well. Appa was excited too –and he was also excited with Gamgammi which we brought with us to your parent’s house.

[22-02-2024]

JULY, 2023.

Do you remember when we went to watch Barbie? Hehehe I didn’t know you’d agree to watch it together with me… let alone wearing all pink OMG it was soooooooo unexpected. But you agreed to my plan… although you said you didn’t like how the color pink looks on you.

But baby can I tell you something? There’s nothing wrong with the color on you. I mean, if you don’t like it due to personal preference I wouldn’t say anything more but you told me you just didn’t like how it looks on you. In my eyes, the suits you well! Pink has many shades, and the one you wore that night looked SO good on you. I think we were stopped by around six times by your fans who noticed you, and I was the one who take the photos :3 you looked amazing baby, with your dazzling smile on display because oh God, I LOVE YOUR SMILEEEEEEEEEE Wonni I really do.

Pink! :3

A week after our movie night, you brought home another good news again. I told you that a friend for Gamgam might be good because god damn corgis never rest. Our kitties aren’t as playful as them so another puppy might be good. I wanted another corgi, but the corgis are so hard to adopt around because they are a special breed :( but ohhhh you found a way. You contacted your friend and you asked them if they had any corgis that are open for adoption.

That was how we adopted our beloved Daisy. Daisy…. Named after my favorite flower hehehe. I love all of you so much.

New addition to our silly little family.

[22-02-2024]

AUGUST 2023.

I don’t know why both Augusts in 2022 and 2023 were literally the worst thing ever because something bad baaaaaaaaddddd happened in August 2022 and I LOST MY PHONE IN AUGUST 2023 which wasn’t as bad as the one happened in 2022 but ugh it was so ARGHHHHHHH. But baby you helped me through it all……. From the moment I lost my phone, everything went downhill. I was so in shock to the point I was shaking but you kept telling me it was all going to be alright…. And I made it!! I made it until today. You helped me to get back on my feet after I had been down on my knees for god knows how long. You saved me… you saved me, and I’m forever grateful for that. I’m forever grateful to have you by my side.

[22-02-2024]

You took me to a florist nearby before we look for a new phone for me. You just know flowers can make my day better.

[22-02-2024]

SEPTEMBER, 2024.

I think my parents heard about what happened to me in August, so next month they announced they wanted to visit us. They even wanted to spent some nights at our place! Papa got way so emotional on the first night. I noticed he went on a talk with you, I never asked you nor him what was between you two because you guys would have told me if y’all wanted to but you didn’t do that, so I guess it was just between you boys. But hey……. He seemed uh, sad and happy at the same time that night? Happy probably because he had never seen me this happy with a man :3 but maybe also sad, knowing that he had to let me go to you. Hehe. You, him, and Xuxi are the only men that will always have a special place in my heart no matter what.

[22-02-2024]

OCTOBER, 2023.

Between your super tight schedules and mine, we always try our best to steal some moments in between. You visit me at work, I visit you on set, we always make time for each other.

We went to IKEA after you finished shooting one day. I asked you to wear a mask because I just didn’t want us to get stopped by. I didn’t mean to be rude, really, but I just wanted to spend the rest of the evening.

Well, guess what!! The mask didn’t work HAHAH so as per usual, I became the photographer. One fan of yours surprised me that night because she said she wanted pictures with me too… which was cute, hehe I remember I was giggling over that.

We bought some new kitchen utensils :3 and artificial plants!! Yeah we bought just exactly those and then went straight to get the famous IKEA ice cream hehehe.

On weekend after that, we went to the beach!! Because I had been whining nonstop about wanting to go to the beach hehehe so as soon as we both got free time to visit the beach, we made the most of it.

We went semi-camping at the beach. Camping because we brought a tent with us, semi because we didn’t spend a single night there but at the nearest hotel hehehehhe. We originally planned to bring the kids too but there were seven of them, and only two of us so we just called our pet sitter to look after them.

That night at the beach was absolutely magical. We were together, staring out at the midnight sea as its waves serenaded us. Our fingers intertwined; our lips melted against each other’s. I swear I could see the stars in your eyes that night.

[22-02-2024]

♥️

[22-02-2024]

NOVEMBER, 2023.

Remember when you said that there is no such thing as a perfect relationship? We had been together for 9 months from February to November last year…. And I think it finally took its best toll on me. I suddenly felt this urge to just… burst out? I don’t know how to describe it any better but I did burst out… I lashed everything out, at you.

Every time I think about it, I can only curse myself for being so foolish. You have told me numerous times that you will love me unconditionally. No matter what I have been through, no matter the battles I’m struggling with, no matter what happens you promised to always be with me, to always love me.

But… sometimes the voices inside my head are just so cruel. They told me that if I become more true to myself in front of you, you’d leave me because I would leave me too if I could… I’m just too much for everyone… whenever I come close to be true to myself, I scare people away… they left me, over and over again. I just didn’t want to lose you, don’t ever want that. But the thought of it came to me right in November last year… when I thought that perhaps It would be best for us to go on our separate ways.

My heart aches every time I try to remember what happened that night. I ruined the mood, I ruined everything. I told you I can’t heal if I don’t focus on myself but truth to be told? I heal better when I’m with you… I was just to ignorant to realize it sooner.

I’m always at my best whenever I’m with you… I’m always at my happiest with you, and it is true.

Thank you for saving me that night, thank you for never giving up on me… on us. Thank you for still loving me the same despite all my storms and my rainy days. I grow better, I learn better. I love you the most, my Jongwon.

In November, we adopted Sunny! Our merry little family, I’m the luckiest ever to have all of you.

You never failed to save me. Always believing in me even when I can't even trust myself.

Two weeks later after my lowest breakdown, you came to me with a golden furball on your hands -definitely not Gamgammi because he is CHONK.

[22-02-2024]

Two months ago. Guess who.

[22-02-2024]

DECEMBER, 2023.

You were born on a very special date, Wonni. When you were born, people were celebrating the end of the year, yet they were also celebrating the new year. They were celebrating what they have accomplished all along the year, and they wish good things on the same day too hoping that the next year to come will treat them kind.

When you were born, your family must be super happy. Eomma, appa, hyungs too (still can’t call them oppa for some reasons HEHEH). The end of the year, yet the beginning of something beautiful.

The 31st of December is a day full of grand celebration, joy, prayers, hope. It warms everything up, despite the cold outside the window.

You were born on that day.

Thank you for being born, my Jongwon. I’m so happy to know that our path crossed on each other’s. I believe fate has brought us together. Who would have thought that the night when you came to me was a part of something grand? Something beautiful… something sacred.

My heart has been borrowed, and yours has been blue. All’s well that ends well to end up with you.

I love you so much, my Jongwon.