333rdmonkman

[333rdmonkman]

idk if you've answered this one but do you have tips on how to write in character descriptions without it seeming unnatural?? whenever i describe a character it just seems like i've broken the storyline so the reader knows she's wearing a purple dress

Writing Character Descriptions.

Pausing the story to give a character description can often break the natural flow of the story and come across as static and forced. But there are a few tricks to help your character descriptions feel more fluid…

1. Descriptions should say something about who the character is.

Whenever you describe a character, it’s good to stop and think about what each piece of their appearance says about them. Why did they choose this outfit with these accessories? What impact has their physical features had on their self esteem? What parts of their personality come through in their posture and resting expression?

Vibrant colors can portray an outgoing or individualistic character. 

Messy outfits and hair show stress, bad time management or sloppiness.

Broken noses, scars, and bruises show rebellion, a fighting spirit, or a rough life.

(The list keeps going; add your own!)

This doesn’t mean that everything you describe needs to convey a character trait to the reader – some things are worth including just to give your readers the ability to visualize the scene – but it’s still very useful to look through your character’s appearance and focus on those things that say the most.

2. Descriptions are more than just static visuals.

People aren’t just composed of the colors they wear and their prominent features. Remember that descriptions can (and should) also include things like:

How they walk and move.

The quality of their voice. 

Nervous ticks and habits.

The way they interact with their own appearance. (E.g putting up their hair, adjusting their suit, twirling their scarf, digging through their purse, etc.)

When combined with well chosen appearance traits, active appearance aspects reveal a much fuller picture of who the character is. 

A black-eyed character with their head held high, their arms swinging, and a pinched upper lip probably instigated (or won) the fight that earned them the black-eye, where as a black-eyed character who curls their arms around themselves and walks with their eyes down is actively avoiding any further attention.

3. Putting it all together: Work description into action.

By including both static visuals and active aspects into the actions the character is taking when they’re introduced, you end up with a much more fluid, natural description.

Static description looks like this…

She stood at the edge of the platform wearing a lacy, purple dress that went to her ankles. Her feet were bare and she wore a cheep iron ring on her right hand. She had pulled her dark hair into a bun, but a few locks had fallen loose. Her lips were full and her nose hooked.

After a moment of hesitation, she stepped off the platform. She let out a breath, smiled, and then continued forward.

Turning that into active description, we get…

The lace trim of her purple dress wavered around her ankles as she picked up her foot and hovered it at the edge of the platform. Her fingers trembled and she tugged at the cheep iron ring on her right hand. A soft gust of wind picked up the dark strands that had fallen from her bun, twirling them around her hooked nose.

She wavered.

With care, she stepped off the platform, flinching at the tiny stones that met her bare feet. She released a breath, her shoulders sinking. Her full lips pulled into a smile. 

These kinds of descriptions have the bonus of eliminating passive voice. In the first description, we have four instances of passive voice (in this case, were and had), where as in the second we find only one instance, which blends into an otherwise active sentence.

Find more writing advice by Bryn here!

[333rdmonkman]

This is a semi-animated music video for our comic, Demon Plague which you can find at Talesofgravedanger.com #demonplague #talesofgravedanger #amv #indiecomics #comics

[333rdmonkman]

The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny: Chapter 1; Something's Wrong with Jambi - Part 2

         “Wish?” spoke a regal, yet flamboyant voice.  The voice of Jambi the Genie.  “Did somebody say wish?”          With renewed excitement, Curtis leaped up from off of Chairy, which inadvertently startled Pterry, causing him to flap his wings madly and lifting himself in the air a couple feet.  Curtis didn’t even notice in his hurry to speak to Jambi.  He crossed the distance in two big strides, bringing him directly in front of the opened box.  He was not surprised when he saw the glowing, green-skinned and turbaned floating head that was Jambi the Genie.          “Well, I did, Jambi,” he explained to the head in the box.  “I wished Pee-wee was finished with helping Miss Yvonne, Reba the Mail Lady, and the King of Cartoons, so he and I could spend some time together.”          The head tilted slightly inside the box, “As you know I can only grant one wish a day, and I usually save it for Pee-wee, but, I’m sure he wouldn’t mind his good friend, Cowboy Curtis, having a wish here and there.”          Curtis was not even thinking of Pee-wee anymore.  He was too excited to be getting a wish of his own.  “Well, I’d be most grateful, there, Jambi.  Thank you!”          The head turned down bashfully, “Please.  Any friend of Pee-wee’s is a friend of mine.  I’m sure Pee-wee would have given you this wish even if he were here.”          Curtis grinned widely, “Except, if he were here I wouldn’t need to make the wish in the first place.”          Jambi appeared perplexed at this concept, before his eyes widen and a bright white smile framed his red tongue.  “Aah!  You certainly are clever, Cowboy Curtis!”           This time it was Curtis who shrugged bashfully.  “Ah, well…”          Jambi cleared his nonexistent throat, to get them back on track.  “You’ve been present many times when Pee-wee made his wishes, so I’m sure you know how this works.  But just in case you weren’t paying attention, just repeat after me.”          Curtis eagerly nodded his affirmation.          “Mecha lecha hi mecha hiney hiney ho!” commanded Jambi.          “Mecha lecha hi mecha hiney hiney ho!” repeated Curtis.          “Mecha lecha hi mecha lecha chally ho!”          “Mecha lecha hi mecha lecha chally ho!”          “Mecha lecha hi mecha lecha cumma home!”          “Mecha lecha hi mecha lecha cumma -- whoa!” finished Curtis as suddenly Jambi’s skin tone changed from a bright glistening green to an angry red and his sparkling eyes rolled back into his head.  The pleasant glow that usually emanated from inside the box was snuffed out, leaving a black emptiness.          The floating head that was Jambi the Genie, began to twitch and convulse savagely and Curtis could not help but fall back on his rump and kicking himself backward frantically in horror until he collided against something hard and with odd and jagged edges that dug into his spine and ribs painfully.  When he looked to see what he came up against he saw the emotionless facade of Conky, the robot, gazing down at him.          “What--  What--  What’s happening to Jambi, Cowboy Curtis?” he asked, worry evident in his voice, if not his face.          Curtis wished he knew.  In all his time coming to the Playhouse he’d never witnessed Jambi do anything like this before, nor had he before heard from any of the others that they had either.  “I--  I don’t know, Conky?  I just don’t know.”          Jambi started spewing out sounds that might have been words, but they were coming out so fast he couldn’t tell for sure.  He thought he recognized some words, but they were not in English.  Curtis had spent enough time with Miss Renee to pick up a few of the terms and phrases she used, and Curtis thought he heard a few spoken by Jambi now.  The language he felt sure was, or at least a close cousin to, Hebrew.  The sound of the genie’s voice sounded hollow and echoey, as if he were hollering down a wide and long tin hallway.          Always appearing when his shenanigans are least wanted, down dropped Randy, a ginger-haired puppet with braces who just loved to antagonize people.  Curtis was sure that Randy was the only mean thing in the Forest of Puppetland.  Even the one-eyed monster, Roger, who was terrifying to behold, turned out to be just a lonely soul looking for a friend.  Randy looked at the terrible spectacle was Jambi the Genie at that moment and then to Cowboy Curtis.  “Oh, Pee-wee ain’t gonna be happy when he finds out you broke his genie.”          Curtis gave Randy a disapproving look.  “I didn’t break ‘im!  He just started doin’--” he gestured to Jambi.  “Well, he just started doin’ that!”          “He looks like he’s using Pee-wee’s exercise machine, while trying to do a tongue twister,” jived Randy.          “Do you have anything to say that might be of some help?”          “Do I look like an exorcist?” sneered Randy.  “Besides, you should know by now that the only person I help is myself, and I can’t wait to see the look on Pee-wee’s face when he sees Jambi jibbering like a maniac.”          Curtis was aware that Randy had said the day’s secret word, and knew the others had heard him, as well, yet nobody screamed, and nobody laughed.  All of a sudden he felt everybody’s eyes on him, and he could sense that they were lookin’ to brave Cowboy Curtis for direction.  Only, he had no idea what to do.  What could he do?  He was just as lost and scared as they were.  He gazed around and saw what he knew he’d see, and he felt utterly helpless.  As if to exaggerate this, Jambi’s box began to quiver and shake, creating a dramatic, if sporadic, drumroll on the wood of it’s stand.          “Ah, forget this!  You ain’t draggin’ me into this!” exclaimed Randy before leaping back into the ceiling where Curtis assumed he lived.         The rattling of the box became more insistent, bringing his attention back to Jambi.  The genie’s red-faced head was twisting and shaking, ałl the while spewing out what Curtis presumed was the genie dialect at such a pace that he wondered if Jambi had time to take a breath.  Heck, he didn’t even know if he breathed to begin with.  If he ever returned to normal Curtis would have to make it a point to ask him.          So, distraught he was with Jambi’s wildly swinging head that he almost didn’t notice the box tipping off the edge of its stand.  He leapt from where he was pressed up against Conky and barely landed within fingers reach of the falling box.  Though he got his digits underneath it in time, the box was much heavier than it looked and its weight kept its momentum and crushed the last three fingers of his right hand.  He tried to pull his hand away in pain, but something kept it glued to the box.  And when he looked to see what was keeping it there it was instead Jambi himself that caught his eye.  Still glowing a fiery red, the head was spinning around rapidly, saying, “Mecha lecha hi--  Mecha lecha--  Mecha--  Mecha lecha --  Lecha--” like a broken record.          Out of simple desperation from lack of any other ideas, but with no hope that it would help, Curtis pleaded, “C’mon, Jambi!  Wake up!”          Immediately the genie’s head stopped spinning.  His skin reverted back to a shiny green.  And his starry eyes replaced the blank whites, only they didn’t seem to be looking at Curtis, or at anything at all, he was sure.  That Jambi the Genie was “broken,” as Randy had put it, and that it was somehow possibly his fault weighed on him as he stared into those blank eyes. The black void remained, however, making the reverted face of Jambi seem even scarier than it had when it was glowing red.  The familiar flashy smile creased the genie’s handsome features, but it lacked the warmth it usually had.  This smile almost seemed menacing.  Curtis’s heart sunk even further. “Mecha lecha hi mecha goin’ home!” commanded Jambi from behind his usual charming smile and then there was a blinding flash and Curtis and Jambi were never seen at Pee-wee’s Playhouse again.

[333rdmonkman]

The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny: Chapter 1; Something's Wrong with Jambi - Part 1

         Cowboy Curtis always felt at peace when unsaddling his horse, Mary Sue, outside of Pee-wee’s playhouse.  It was something about the forest of Puppet Land he must ride through to get there that did it, he was sure.  And he knew it wasn’t just him that noticed it either.  Everyone who visited the playhouse greeted those who were inside through the main window, which was almost always open, as they approached the front door with big, welcoming smiles, and exuded an aura of great cheer.  It was because they had to travel through the forest to get there.  It was like some kind of magic.          He tied up the reigns on a post Pee-wee had put there specifically for him and Mary Sue, a trauth of fresh water, with a hint of lemon (just as she likes it), and a bucket of newly sowed oats sitting next to it.  “Bless ya, Pee-wee,” he said from behind a toothy grin.          Plucking a stray lock of her mane from out of her face and tucking it behind her ear, he said, “You sit tight, darlin’.  You have some o’ them tasty oats an’ I’ll be back before ya know it.”  As if to give her consent, Mary Sue snorted and stomped her hoof, before burying her snout in the bucket.  Satisfied she was content, Curtis began to make his way up the stairs to the front door.          As he approached the main window, opened wide, as always, he glimpsed a flower looking out at him from inside.  He flashed it his most charming smile, and it smiled back, and…  Did it blush?  The flower disappeared from view, but he could here a small child-like voice excitedly whisper, “Straighten up girls!  Cowboy Curtis is here!”  This was followed by a cluster of giggling and even a, “How do my petals look?” by very similar voices.            Curtis knew it was silly, but he puffed out his chest and put on his most manly strut.  As all three pretty little flowers came into view, he saw that they were all standing perfectly straight, not a bend in their stems, and their petals were puffed out and pouty.         “Well, howdy there!  And how are the three most lovely li’l lilies there ever was on this gee-orgeous afternoon?”          “Oh, Cowboy Curtis, are you flirting with us?” they asked in unison, creating a harmony in the phrase that would not normally be there if they had said the same thing in the same way separately.          He chuckled amicably.  “I just very well may be.”  At this their stems curled as they swooned and their petals folded forward to hide their… Yup, they’re blushing.  Well, that’s something they don’t share on The Nature of Things with David Suzuki.          “Hey, so is Pee-wee around?  I came to see what crazy antics he is up to today,” he asked once they had regained some form of composure.          “He left to help The King of Cartoons find a cartoon he misplaced,” answered one.          “He went to help Reba the Mail Lady deliver bills.”, said another.          “He’s gone to help Miss Yvonne, the most beautiful woman in all of Puppet Land, go dress shopping,” relayed the last.          Curtis’s eyes widened.  “Well, did he go help The King of Cartoons, Reba the Mail Lady, or Miss Yvonne?”          “He went to help all of them,” they once again said together.          “It’s been a busy day,” said the first.          “So, it would seem,” he chuckled.  Pee-wee Herman always amazed him.          “I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if I stepped in an’ took a load off.  It was a long ride,” which was only half true.  It was a long ride through the Forest, but it had a way of rejuvenating those who passed through it, and he wasn’t as tired as he made himself sound.          The three posies giggled amongst themselves for a moment before turning back to him and saying together, “You’re always welcome at the Playhouse, Cowboy Curtis!”          “Thank you, very kindly, ladies.”  Tipping his hat to them, he stepped passed the window and before he pushed open the most oddly shaped door he has ever come across, even after all his travels, and walked inside, he saw movement in the corner of his eye.  He looked up and saw a kite hanging high in the sky, swaying slightly in the afternoon.          He waved and greeted it, “Why, howdy, Mr. Kite.  How’s the weather lookin’ today?”          The kite raised one spindly arm and waved back.   “Hello there, Cowboy Curtis.  The weather is just fine and dandy as far as my eyes can see.”          “Well that’s great to hear!  Thank you kindly, Mr. Kite,” and he stepped inside.          In all of Puppet Land, magic is all around them.  Felt, but never seen.  The deeper into the forest one travels, the more powerful the magic felt, and visual signs became relevant.  It changed before your eyes.  One moment it would be a peaceful wood, then the next a playful jungle, and then a quaint savannah, and then back to a forest again.  Even the animals that naturally belong to these habitats wander freely, but never are they aggressive to passersby.  But it was the Playhouse that was the center to it all.  Where magic was truly seen in almost everything that existed within and around it.  Nearly all the items in the house were alive, conscious personalities that could talk just like people.  Even parts of the Playhouse itself were alive, as was evidenced by the large pile of wood on the floor by Pee-wee’s bunk bed on the other side of the common room that stared back at him with large swirling eyes.          “Good afternoon, Floory,” said Curtis.          With his usual slow and melancholy voice, the pile of wood replied, “Good afternoon, Cowboy Curtis.”          Curtis gazed around the room and saw all the things he’d grown accustomed to since he became friends with Pee-wee.  Things he was happy to call his friends, as well. And he greeted them all.          “Howdy, Globey.  Clocky.  Conky.  Magic Screen.  Chairy.  Pterry. “  They all responded in a nearly unintelligible jumble of salutations.          Chairy began waving her armrests wildly to get his attention.  “Pee-wee’s not here right now, but if you want to sit and wait, I’d love for you to have a seat on me.”          He took off his hat, “Well, I’m much obliged, there, Chairy.  I could think of no better place to sit.”          “Oh, Cowboy Curtis, you’re too sweet,” she replied as he plopped down on top of her.  She wrapped her armrests around him cozily.  He had to admit, Chairy was the most comfortable piece of furniture he’d ever had the pleasure of sitting on.  Heck, he’d bet that even the King of Cartoons’ throne wasn’t as comfortable as she was.          Placing his hat in his lap, bringing his hands to the back of his head to lay back on, and crossing his surprisingly clean boots, he stretched out and relaxed.          “So, how long do you think we’ll have to wait?” he asked of them, and was answered with a cacophony of screams and laughter.          “What?  Did I say the secret word?”, he asked with a stunned smile on his face.          Pterry, the talking pterodactyl, swooped down from where he was perched and landed on Chairy’s back -- or head, he could never tell for sure -- just over his right shoulder.  “Yes you did, Cowboy Curtis!  You did!  You did!” he exclaimed.          “What?  Wait?” Another blaring of screams answered him and he could not help but join in the laughter that followed.          Pterry was hopping up and down excitedly, his wings flapping wildly.  “I so do love the secret word!”          “So do I, Pterry.  So do I,” he said as he patted the little dinosaur on the head amiably.          Curtis leaned back and stared at the ceiling thoughtfully for a moment then said to himself, “I wish Pee-wee will get back soon.  I was really hopin’ to hang out with him today.”          A glow at the corner of his eye caught his attention.  When he looked to where the glow was emanating he saw the familiar ornately carved wooden box that housed the most powerful source of magic of all.  Two panels swung open like double doors to reveal that powerful source, but from his vantage point he could not see inside.          “Wish?” spoke a regal, yet flamboyant voice.  The voice of Jambi the Genie.  “Did somebody say wish?”

[333rdmonkman]

Conflicted

I'm constricted. Afflicted by emotions I just cannot shed. I'm conflicted. With hypocritical notions running through my head. I'm restricted. Going through the motions on the road I am led. I'm addicted. Drowning in the potion that keeps me misled. I'm convicted. Vindicating devotion with the blood I have bled.

[333rdmonkman]

Nosferatu Christ

A tale told a billion times Propaganda for the soul For virtue has forgotten The purpose of its goal Pure of heart Tainted black A soul given Taken back A dozen men three days past Feast for the first time First on bread made to flesh Then blood made from wine Pure of heart Tainted black Lord of Lords Taken back Acolytes of darkness Crucifix in hand Son of God, Satan's friend Forsaken Holy Land Soul of gold Tainted black Lord of Lords Taken back Unholy savior Take my soul Live forever Is my goal Pure of heart Tainted black A soul given Taken back

[333rdmonkman]

I have a reality I write in that is something like that. Most of my fantasy is based around that idea, but focusing more on the moon that was suppose collide into Pangaea and didn't.

In another reality, the Americas, Australia, Europe, Asia, Africa, and Antartica don’t exist. Instead, the super-continent of Pangaea never broke up.

[333rdmonkman]

Hey all you Pokemon Go maniacs who are also Dragon Ball Z fans, I came up with a concept for a Dragon Ball based game that is similar to Pokemon Go, but adapted to fit the Dragon Ball universe. Now, dont go thinking this is just a rip off of Pokemon Go, it would not be, only certain key game play elements would be similar. But anyways check out what I have here and spread the word, and maybe if it gets seen by the right people we'll have our own game to annoy the world with. #dragonballrush #makedragonballrushhappen

[333rdmonkman]

Josh says:

Many a year I’ve dreamt of what Avernus looked like, and it’s as unwelcoming as I imagined it! Ben says: Please don’t make me draw an expansive landscape for every level of Hell. Please don’t make me draw an expansive landscape for every level of Hell. Please don’t make me draw an expansive landscape for every level of Hell. 

[333rdmonkman]

[333rdmonkman]

Page 2 of TMNT: House of Ms #tmnthouseofms

[333rdmonkman]

#tmnthouseofms