a-dragon-system

[a-dragon-system]

welcome to being a system trauma-holder!

it's great, we got:

constant triggers from out of nowhere, be it that one random note in a song that you can't figure out the reasoning of, OR a photo you looked at for a split second!

eye contact bad. no

don't touch me, but also the definition of touch-starved

can recall a negative memory from childhood in 0.2 seconds but stares off into the void in confusion when told about literally any other memory

every song now gives you a flashback! yaaaay

don't even get me started on a sudden octave change in someone's voice that somehow also manages to be a trigger

you KNOW that there's a memory somewhere that's being set off by this ONE thing but you can't FIND IT

*weird thing happens, furthering the trigger and therefore uncovering the rest of the memory* o h .

your brain (or alters) randomly decided to mention a very specific event from your childhood as a casual thing 'cause why not, and now you're seemingly stuck in what feels like 2011 and you can't. get back out

"where are we again??? 2004??" when you weren't even BORN in 2004

*looks at a certain photograph for exactly one second* oh no

breaking down over missing your mom when there's likely no reason to even miss her at all, only to realize you actually miss just having a parent figure in general

"hey do you remember playing [blank] as a kid?" proceeds to stare off into the void, confused out of their mind. wh a t are they talking about

"when did that happen?" proceeds to lists off the exact time/date it happened, how old you were, and any general context in seconds

I want to hold this plush but I also don't because the texture of the fur alone will likely set off a memory

certain names = bad

don't look at me

hey could you maybe not raise your voic- okay then

aAAAAAAAAAAA

it's 3 AM and I've been reliving the same memories on loop for the past week thanks to our own playlists on spotify. what am I doing

where are we™

getting very used to always feeling in danger around the people you currently live with, so you're now hesitant to move out since you think it'll always end up the same

endless fight-or-flight. thank you ptsd

constantly comparing things you encounter both irl and online to a certain event in your life and seeming like you just can't let something go

when in reality you just haven't forgotten it

every night is crying hours™

so here are the pros:

you remember everything

and here are some of the cons!:

you remember everything

[a-dragon-system]

This. Is my life. - Connor

I dont usually meme or even post here but.... this happens too often for me to count at this point and that's on caretaker (?) culture ig

[a-dragon-system]

Us: Hi, just calling back to schedue our counseling appointment here's our body's legal name.

Them: oh please thank them for giving us that. We're going to send them some paperwork for them to fill out. So if you could get them to fill that out and send it back that would be great, thank you.

Us: ...

Us: I'm confused

(I know my mom called them first and told them we use they/them pronouns but like...why you using 3rd person pronouns for a 2nd person interaction?)

[a-dragon-system]

Ah yes. The joy of being triggered by everything in life that brings you joy

the shittiest thing about triggers when you have DID is not even knowing a) why theyre triggering to you or b) that its even going to be a trigger at all. youre doing something totally normal for you to do and your brain hits the panic button and starts screaming and youre like!!!!! why are we freaking it!!!!!! this isnt even traumatic!!!!! while parts of your brain sit there in the background watching Knowingly. girl i thought you were supposed to be helping me!!!!!!!

[a-dragon-system]

What do oranges taste like to people who aren't allergic? Please someone help me I just need to know

[a-dragon-system]

Also. 559 different artists? Sounds about right.

spotify wrapped hit different for systems, as the host im lookin thru n im like yeah yeah thats m- WHO THE FUCK IS LITENING TO SHOWTUNES

[a-dragon-system]

And then one of us protectors/caretakers pull up with the "no baby, it's ok, I'll take care of it. See all better. It's a fuzz ball. It can't hurt you" and hope it helps calm them down.

Being a system little is:

Seeing a fuzz ball on the ground/on you and panicking because

“Is ThAt A bUg!??”

[a-dragon-system]

Reblog if your page is a safe space for anyone of any nationality and ethnicity.

Reblog if your page is a safe space for anyone in the LGBTQ+ community.

Reblog if your page is a safe space for anyone with a disability or disorder.

Reblog if your page is a safe space for anyone who has experienced or is experiencing trauma.

Reblog if your page is a safe space.

[a-dragon-system]

Lmao, that was so funny, hang on. Lemme text that to the group chat.

Dissociates and tells the system.

[a-dragon-system]

trauma: happens

the system:

[a-dragon-system]

We always identify as fucking problem. Thank you.

-Rowen & Rylin

cis protectors in our system:

[a-dragon-system]

Me switching between 3 alters rapidly all day, knowing I'm about to be smacked with a life ending migraine:

[a-dragon-system]

Us in therapy be like...

When you specifically have to do something but then another headmate gets close and you start dissociating:

[a-dragon-system]

[a-dragon-system]

The Sensible Alter: We should probably work through our trauma

The Persecutor:

[a-dragon-system]

time for the daily "is my memory loss related to autism, adhd, cptsd, or did?" freakout session

[a-dragon-system]

And then we rapid swich and no one processes anything

It’s either everyone has an opinion or I don’t here from anyone the whole session