a-lady-of-pseudony

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

masterlist of ao3 Polin fan fiction I've written:

__________canon divergence___________

If Colin wanted to marry Penelope as soon as she turned of marriageable age: to court a wallflower

a canon divergent fix-it of sorts with lots of fluff and season 1 feels and no Whistledown (8k words FINISHED)

If Penelope took out her frustrations on Colin by bad mouthing him in the LW papers: we can't be friends

a post-s2 story inspired by the lyrics of the song "we can't be friends" by ariana grande, hurt/comfort with Colin just begging for Penelope's attention (16k words FINISHED)

If Penelope and Colin exchanged letters in the summer after s2 when Penelope was mad at him: unanswered

a post-s2 epistolary fic outlining Colin and Penelope falling in love through letters (8k words FINISHED) includes UNWRITTEN, an accompanying fic with scenes from moments mentioned in their letters (2k words UNFINISHED)

__________modern era au's_____________

If in modern times, Penelope was unhappily married to Alfred Debling, living as a writer in London, while Colin was just the old childhood crush who she fell out of touch with: storm coming, good husband

an infidelity fic where Colin and Penelope are each other's long lost loves, the one that got away. (6k words UNFINISHED)

If, in modern times, Colin was married and Penelope and him had an emotional affair: careless whispers

a modern times au infidelity fic inspired by the lyrics of "careless whisper" by george michael with some sexy scenes (11k words FINISHED - EPILOGUE IS COMING)

If, in modern times, besties Colin and Penelope started hooking up but never talked about it with one another: as i bite your lip

a best friends to lovers modern au where Colin and Penelope descend into friends with benefits--who never talk about the fact that they are having benefits, porn with plot (6k words)

_____one shots/discontinued works_____

- If Colin and Penelope were engaged and acted improper in ballrooms during their engagement: an accompanied wallflower

Penelope Featherington is still to be found in the shadiest, most secluded corner of every ball now that she is engaged. It is simply that she is no longer to be found alone.

- In modern times, it's Valentine's Day and Eloise has just made Penelope go on a blind date with someone. She just didn't let Penelope know it was the handsome brother Penelope never got to meet: and that's the closest I've come to my heart exploding

if you ever have prompts for Polin fan fiction, send them in, I am always happy to comply <3

be sure to leave comments if you do read any of these and like them, comments make me too happy <3

OTHER FANDOM FIC MASTERLISTS:

9-1-1

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

Have this cute little idea I had for the spouses friend group

Phillip knows how to make perfume and does so using the plants he grew. He makes them when he (almost always) accidentally grows too many of his plants and sells them in his nursery as a side gig along with cologne, and pet friendly perfumes.

It started out as a bet between Michael and Phillip back when they were rooming together in university. Penelope had just become their roommate and Phillip as a welcoming gift grew her some of the roses that share her name. As always, Phillip accidentally grew too many.

"They smell really good," Penelope said as she picked up one of the roses. "Imagine it as a perfume!"

"Would they make a good perfume though?" Michael asked.

Phillip snapped his head towards Michael. "Watch yourself Stirling, those are fighting words talking about my babies!"

Penelope was taken aback; she had never seen Phillip that fired up. Michael grinned; he loved getting his friend this riled up.

"Oh, wanna bet?" Michael asked. "If you can make a perfume, a good one, out of your left-over plants than I will behave for a month."

Phillip raised an eyebrow. "A whole month? Even when you get bored?"

Michael nodded. Penelope's jaw dropped. One thing she quickly learned with living with these two is that getting Michael to behave when he's bored often required the wrath of his mother, and even then his head of the family cousin would often just give Michael a slap on the wrist, or Michael will sweet talk his way out of it. Now don't get her wrong Michael doesn't blow off responsibility when he needs to do it but there has been more than one rule made because of him.

It was a deal too sweet for Phillip not to take and the pride of his plants were on the line.

Phillip shook Michael's hand. "Deal."

After doing the research the boys agreed to giving Phillip six months to extract the oils from the plants, mix them together, and let the perfume age in an airtight bottle before trying it. Based on their living space and what materials he could get Phillip decided to use the enfleurage methods to extract the oils. On a sheet of glass he laid down a thin heated layer of coconut oil with a small amount of beeswax. Letting it cool Phillip proceeded to place the petals of the roses in it before setting it between a wood frame. He would then change out the petals once or twice a day until he got the desired fragrance.

Determined to win this bet Phillip even paid one of the art students to design a decorative bottle for him to put the perfume in. The glass was the same shade of creamy pink as the flower with small wires and jewels wrapped around it to form a butterfly.

"Done," Phillip said as set down the bottle in front of his friends.

Penelope picked up the bottle and sprayed a little on her wrist. "Oh, this smells delicious!'

Michael takes Penelope's wrist and sniffs. "Damn, now I have to behave for a month!"

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

Shout-out to Hyacinth for being the only Bridgerton girl to actually get a decent marriage proposal. And shout-out to Gregory for being the only Bridgerton guy to actually deliver a decent marriage proposal.

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

Besties/in laws/ brothers and sisters- Penelope and Michael, they can never make me hate you

"She had years and years of love for Colin" -Penelope Featherington

"He had years and years of love for Francesca" -Michael Stirling

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

Book Colin be straight out going to pop a vain and paralyze in fear because he's scared someone is out to get her girl, in more ways than one

Show Colin is officially stronger than book Colin.

Show Colin actually managed to last a few weeks while trying to hold back his unhinged behavior for his future wife and watching her flirt with Debling, book Colin didn't even last a single week and was ready to fight Penelope's lover that he made up in his head.

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

Penelope: One kiss, it would not mean anything.

Inner Colin after the kiss:

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

Penelope: I'm going to accept Debling's proposal.

Colin: I'm pregnant...it's yours.

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

Anyone please, does some of you remember that modern fic of Bridgerton where in Michael and Penelope become close friends during Benophie's wedding/ after wedding party and they call each other sugar unintentionally making Colin and Francesca jealous along the way, someone with the link or title please, it's making me crazy

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

He's so pathetic... I love it

bitches listen, colin bought the same pastry penelope ate cause he wanted to know what her mouth tasted like in that moment: THIS IS CANON.

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

I need help because lack of Bridgerton season 3 episodes and the wait is killing me so I need help, someone know the link or title of that Penelope x Michael FanFiction where they call each other sugar and they have friendship bracelet driving both Francesca and Colin to madness it's a modern au if I remember please help me please

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

omashu?.. you mean..

the city founded in honor of star crossed lovers, whose villages were enemies?..

who wore red and blue clothing?..

...

the bait is baiting but i am no better than a fish

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

This is what I have always been talking about!!!!!!

Eloise v Penelope

I think a lot of Eloise's anger about Penelope being Lady Whistledown comes down to it being the very last person she expected. Eloise imagined Lady W being this emancipated woman, living off her own riches, poking fun at society from outside of it. That Lady W didn't have to conform to the normal expectations of women, to marry and have babies and obey their husbands. She says it herself in S1, I think it was episode 2 or 3. But for that reality to not be the case, that Lady W was in fact a member of the ton, and someone who did have to conform, and did have to marry was a real blow to this fantasy.

That, of course and the fact that it was Penelope. Of course, she has resentment that Penelope was her best friend and lied to her, and exposed her secrets, especially after Eloise was honest and truthful in their friendship. However, I think it's a bit deeper than that. The awful truth is, I don't believe Eloise thought Penelope was cleverer than her. That's not to say that Eloise believed Penelope to be dumb, but she thought they were the same. That they both held the same beliefs but that Eloise was better and a bigger advocate for those beliefs. And Eloise doesn't like having to confront the fact that Penelope actually does want what many other women are supposed to want, and that Eloise is somewhat unconventional and alone in her outspoken beliefs. And Penelope doesn't want to disappoint Eloise so she does, in many ways, hide her desires, and tries to agree with Eloise's beliefs about womanhood and feminism.

That Penelope was smart, clever, and even manipulative and jaded is not a welcome surprise for Eloise. That she didn't know her friend -- even though we know that Penelope did not hide so much as she was overlooked -- is a betrayal. Penelope has always been kind, sweet and very much a sidekick to Eloise. To learn that Penelope was her own leading lady is not welcome, especially when she was leading Eloise on a goose chase.

Something in the books really resonates here too. Colin's worry that if Penelope is discovered as Lady W, it would have her cast out of society, while if someone like Cressida were to be recognized as Lady W would have them be applauded. Because Penelope is not popular, so she cannot be clever and gain notoriety through a pen name. Cressida would be able to remain in society even if she were unmasked as Lady W because she is popular, and even though she's probably recognized as a b*tch, she's a b*tch the ton are comfortable with and the one they would applaud as being so clever to get away with it.

I think Eloise believes the same. She would rather it be Cressida, or probably more like Lady Danbury, because she expects it and because it goes with what she believed. But it cannot be the 'frumpy, unpopular, unattractive' girl like Penelope. Because that's a blow to their ego, that they were misled by someone so... unpopular, a 'loser'. That's not to say that Eloise is so unkind she's always thinking her friend is a loser. But she knows, at least subconsciously, that she is more popular (at the very least because of her station and her family, even if she doesn't recognize that her beauty is a factor as well). And while Eloise has different views on marriage and feminism that may be considered radical, she is still in many ways a product of her environment, and does not take kindly to someone she thinks as 'less' socially to hold one over on her. And I don't mean class. Eloise likely would have been pleased too if it was a maid or something because that would be so clever. But Penelope, a member of the ton, who's not even as cool or outspoken as her? Not likely.

I'm not dismissing Eloise's rightful anger at having her secrets aired out (although I do understand Penelope's dilemma and decision - better for the Bridgerton's to suffer a small scandal than to be involved in a fight with the Queen and dragged down completely). But pay attention to what Eloise says. "I do not even know you. I look at you and all I feel is pity for you. Sequestered here in this very room writing your secret little scandal sheet, tarnishing everyone in town all because you are too scared to stand up for yourself in reality. You are something Penelope, an insipid wallflower indeed."

These words are cutting to the heart of the matter. Penelope is a wallflower, Penelope is unpopular. Penelope could never have accomplished something so clever. All she did was write a little scandal sheet... although it's not little at all, is it?

Let's not forget that before Eloise got in over her head with the Queen, she was obsessed with Lady W because she admired her. Penelope changed Lady W to Eloise's preferences, because she wanted, in some way, to be clever the way Eloise likes people to be clever. Even though it is nothing to scoff at for a woman to be a popular column writer, especially in those days, even if it is for a 'scandal sheet'. But that was one way women had power back in those days, was through what they said, and the rumors that swirled. Penelope has a lot of power through her pen, because she can make and unmake a family. She got rid of Daphne's odious suitor. The women started a rumor, and Penelope wrote about it, and the next day the man had to leave town. Not because of a mere rumor -- because of a PUBLISHED rumor. And while those rumors can fade, as they do, it let Daphne be free to get courted by Simon.

Eloise still hasn't actually confronted her privilege. Theo did tell her, "hey, guess what, you're super privileged and you're putting me in a bad spot." And while she does end up understanding that in the end, breaking things off with Theo, she's still not actually understanding her privilege amongst the ton. Eloise's sister is a duchess, her brother is a viscount. A little rebellion by running around with political radicals will not destroy her. She is still very much a desired connection people would want. Something Penelope knows.

But Penelope herself, as herself, has no power. "too scared to stand up for yourself in reality." And what exactly is Penelope supposed to do? She is not the popular girl with suitors lining up for her. She's not the rich girl who's money can protect her or who's father can protect her. She's a girl with no influence herself. Every time she's tried to help someone as herself, she's been dismissed. When she warned Colin, he dismissed her. When she begged Marina, she dismissed her. When she spoke to her mother, she dismissed her. When she warned Eloise, she dismissed her. So she made herself influential through a pen name.

How can Penelope stand up for herself? She can't without someone like a Bridgerton in her corner. Eloise can insult Cressida in defense of Penelope, but Penelope can't do it herself without feeling actual consequences. But Eloise will never feel any consequence for dismissing Cressida or anyone else, barring someone above her station.

Only a great scandal can destroy Eloise... such as cavorting with a man unchaperoned... and something, again, Penelope warns her about. Of course, Penelope has ulterior motives as well. She doesn't want Eloise to discover her secret. But this is still a big risk that Eloise is taking, which is what Penelope warns her of and is dismissed. Eloise not only risks herself but her family's reputation there too. And while, again, the scandal may not last long, especially not for her brothers, it will affect Eloise as being, the dreaded term... 'spoiled goods'.

And that can feel like a double standard. I mean, Penelope is alone with Colin... then again, Penelope doesn't exactly have a reputation to protect. No one would believe her to be a seductress when they spend so much time dismissing her. And no one would consider Colin to be interested in her since, once again, she's not on their radar. Eloise's privilege is a double edged sword, though she benefits from it more than she doesn't.

It's not fair. But it is a reality. And I think it's a disservice to women of the time not to show how they are punished for standing out. Eloise is loud and brash and suffers little to no consequences for it. If that were actually the case, a girl is often sent to a mad house or married off quickly or some other way to silence her and stifle her. But Eloise has brothers who love her and will protect her. This is a privilege. The first time she feels any censure is through Lady W's pamphlet, but again, it is something that can be brushed aside with her family's protection, though it had the unfortunate timing of coinciding with a broken engagement.

I don't really think the blame is only on one party. Penelope also made a lot of mistakes. That's not to say I think that Penelope owed it to Eloise to reveal that she's Lady W, or reveal her secret to the queen to spare Eloise. Eloise started that battle despite Penelope's warnings and got in the cross hairs of the queen for it. Penelope shouldn't have to sacrifice herself. Also Penelope sharing Lady W with Eloise is taking away something that belongs to her. Eloise would, I think, seriously try to take over the narrative of Lady W if she knew. Already Penelope feels pressured to change Lady W for Eloise's admiration, so I do think that if Eloise knew who Penelope was before hand, Penelope would lose it to her completely, and it would have turned completely into Eloise's pamphlet (which honestly would have led to more problems because Eloise would forgo subtle criticism and instead loudly criticize societal norms). Eloise is overwhelming, and Penelope is a pushover, especially when it comes to her friend who she doesn't want to lose.

But there were better ways she could have gone about it. She could have warned Violet that Colin and Marina were planning on eloping and told her to push for a long engagement instead. She could have told Violet that Eloise had gotten into trouble with the Queen. I mean, I think those are her only options really. Neither would have spared her mother from being furious with her or Eloise thinking she betrayed her by telling Violet... but it would have been minimal damage in comparison. Then again, there is the big risk that it wouldn't work because, as I said, Penelope is regularly dismissed.

In the end, yes, Penelope was a bad friend. And she's not a particularly helpful or good daughter/ sister / cousin. Then again, her family hasn't been very kind to her either and Eloise has overlooked her as well. Is Eloise the biggest victim? No. That would be Marina, who, I would argue, ended in a better situation than if she had married Colin. Did Penelope have a duty to fix her mistakes and repair the reputations of people she ruined? I don't think so. It would have been nice but... people have to be able to recover on their own, and a lot of things can only really be fixed with time or a new scandal. The worst harm she did was to herself and her family. She feels the consequences of her actions too. Is Eloise a victim? Yes, but better the victim of a scandal sheet than the victim of the Queen. Does Penelope need redemption? No. I don't think so. Penelope is complex and already experiences the pain of what she does and the consequences of all her actions. She knows what she puts other people through as well.

Anyway, thank you for reading to the end of my rant. I probably contradicted myself somewhere in there but... oh well. Just my thoughts.

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

There's girl math, then there's RMB Math

Romancing Mr Bridgerton book spoilers

Me with the rmb fandom: "Polin are so 'He fell first but she fell harder'"

Rmb fandom: "but Pen fell in love first, didn't she?"

Me, laughing: "Yeah"

insert:

*Colin falling from the horse and landing in the mud*

*Pen falling flat out of the carriage after Colin's proposal*

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

Is it hot in here or what?!?!!

excuse you?? sir?? surely there are laws against this

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

So I made a part two to this. Hope you all like it!

AO3: Link

Felicity leaned into her sister, purposely laying her head on her shoulder. Her eyes narrowed on the oblivious Marquess Odysseus Rose of Winchester, who sat across from them. The interloper first came two weeks ago and has been here every other day since! Felicity was sick of him. What kind of cad courts a woman who is spoken for? Does he not know or care that Penelope has . . .what was that word that countess used? An understanding? An agreement? Does not matter. What matters is that the interloper is trying to ruin it!

"Have you noticed the similarities between the myth of Eros and Psyche and the story of the Beauty and the Beast?" Penelope asked the interloper as she flipped through the book her true intended gave her.

The interloper's face lit up. "Yes!" Quickly, he flipped through his own book, fairytales collected and published in 1812 by two men who call themselves the Brothers Grimm. Penelope had gushed when the interloper brought it with him today. "So many elements are the same! A beautiful woman whisked off to a magical castle where she learned she would be living with or had been married to a monster. The very same monster they later fell in love with!"

Penelope giggles and Felicity frowns. That interloper better not be getting any ideas. Being kidnapped is not romantic!

"Though I would not want to be Psyche," Penelope winced. "To be with child during those labors. . ."

Felicity looked up. "I agree! Penelope, never be like Psyche, please!"

The interloper chuckeled. "Though it does show great bravery," he added.

Felicity whipped her head around. Is this interloper plan to leave Penelope with child and have do some sort of test?! Will he leave like that George cad did to cousin Marina?!

Felicity stands, ready to throw all of her ten year old weight against the interloper when-

"Felicity!"

Felicity pouted. Drat, she gained the attention of their mama.

"Felicity why don't we give Penelope and Lord Winchester some space," Portia suggested. Though it felt more like an order.

Felicity does not want to give them space. That would only invite ungentlemanly behavior from the interloper.

"Felicity."

The youngest Featherington found her reluctantly walking towards hwr mother.

"We must not interfere less the marquess change his mind and leave your sister with no options," Portia whispered to her youngest.

Felicity's jaw dropped. No options?! Penelope has another option! All the mamas talk about how they don't take Colin Bridgerton seriously as a potential suitor due to his. . .his. . .oh, what was the word several of the mamas used again? Understanding? Yes, understanding! No matchmaking mama saw Colin Bridgerton as a potential suitor due to his understanding with Penelope!

Portia waves Felicity off, her scheming face now in place. Felicity turns towards her father, hoping he would come to defend Felicity's favorite sister and future brother, but of course, Lord Featherington still hides behind his newspaper.

Felicity has to stop herself from stomping to the window, lest her mama acolds her again. Hopefully, her future brother will be here soon. He was almost over as much as the interloper.

Felicity crawled into the window seat and huffed when she saw no sight of her future brother. Was he that secure with his understanding with Penelope that he had no fear of the interloper? Well, Felicity will have to change that.

Thank all that was holy that marquess did not stay long after. But did he have to kiss her sister’s hand?! Felicity felt her hackels raise. No, this man WILL NOT break up her sister and Felicity's favorite future brother! As soon as she watched Marquess Rose drive off in his carriage, Felicity took off sprinting across the street with a quick word she was visiting Hyacinth.

The Bridgerton butler, Humboldt, open the door. "Miss Featherington, Miss Hyacinth isn't here at the moment but I can-"

"I'm here to see Colin!" Felicity blurted out, trying to catch her breath.

Humboldt stared at the ten year old girl for one moment then two.

"Please its important."

Just as she was afraid he was going to deny her the butler let her in and had her wait in one of the drawing rooms.

Felicity found herself pacing. Colin needed to hurry up that marquess could be thinking up ways to ruin her sister at this very moment! Colin needs to go court Penelope more than he ever has before! Should they get flowers? Yes, flowers are always nice!

"Felicity what's wrong-"

"We must make haste to the florist!" Felicity declared, trying to push Colin out the door he just came in.

"Felicity!"

"We must get something beautiful! But no yellow!" Felicity pauses. "AND NO ROSES!" Can't have Penelope associating the flowers with that stupid marquess.

Colin turned around, grabbing hold of Felicity's shoulders he kneeled down so they were eye level. "Felicity what is going on? Why do we need to go to a florist?"

Felicity huffed. Could he not ask on their way to the florist? "Marquess Odysseus Rose," Felicity spat the name, "has called upon Penelope yet again! He will not leave us alone and he is trying to take my sister away! Mama has hinted marriage between him and Penelope and we can not allow that to happen!"

Colin froze before Felicity finished her sentence. "Marquess Rose was at your house today?"

"Yes!" Felicity cried frustrated. "We can not allow him to out court you for Penelope's hand! Now we must make haste to the florist!"

Colin stiffly stood. "Yes, let's. Perhaps we'll also stop at the bookstore and maybe get Penelope a new handkerchief as well."

"Oh yes!" Felicity agreed, taking Colin's offered arm like she would do with one of her sisters. "Something with a pretty lace border! Also may I suggest the Brothers Grimm?"

There is no need for the interloper to bring the book over anymore if Penelope has her own copy, courtesy of her true suitor.

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

That eyes 👀👀👀

they're so cute i feel physically ill

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

I AM DYING!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE FCK!!!! THE TENSION, AAAAAAAAAA

Bridgerton Season 3 | Sneak Peek | Netflix

Im shaking my whole body is shaking