{Give me wodka with the taste of your lips.} There are two hearts on the floor. One is mine, both are yours.
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Kazakhstan’s Minister of Communications and Informatics has blocked the Tumblr site because it contained 60 sites of terrorism, extremism, and pornography in 2015.
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Cheers to the diary no one reads:
Do you ever realise how much people expect of you? It’s like man I study for something I’m already tired of to get a job I don’t wanna do. I have a boyfriend who I barely see just because of life. Sometimes I wonder, is this it? Is this the best?
Working a job, seeing the people you love only in the evening, if you’re lucky also in the weekends
It’s like there is barely time to breathe, to write, to self reflect.
I never understood people with stress, with anxiety, with mental disorders but I do now. I really do.
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You know the saddest part of all? What’s real sad is when you are finally talking to a really nice, goodlooking, funny and smart guy and you guys are literally talking like all the time and he asks how your day has been. A guy out of a million, so special and like almost perfection.
What’s sad is that even on those moments, when you’re laughing at his jokes or any other moments he’s being cute and nice and a flash of your ex passes by in your memory and you compare and compare and you can’t help it but he’s not him you know. That sparkle, burning in your hart is not burning now. It’s not him and you know it but you keep trying to adapt because you’re so scared otherwise you’re never getting over him.
What is real sad is that even an ex that drove you crazy and that you call garbage in memes with friends, is the ex that flashes through your mind when you’re talking with a decent guy.
All because he’s not your ex. And you will keep on trying and ignoring that pain in your stomach. But at the end. You know it and you just wish for a time that those memories don’t flash by and that you can move on.
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from dawn to dusk: titi mosquera for flesh magazine mexico july 2018
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but honestly the scene in love actually where emma thompson goes to open the christmas gift that she thinks is going to be the necklace she found and she’s totally expecting it to be the necklace but then she opens it and it’s a joni mitchell cd and in that moment she realizes that her husband is having an affair but she’s sitting around the tree with her family on christmas eve so she has to quickly hide her disappointment and shock and sadness and her husband is still sitting there grinning like an idiot thinking he got her a good gift even though her world is falling apart in that second and then she excuses herself for a moment and goes to their bedroom and cries to herself for just a few minutes as the gravity of it all hits her and she knows her marriage is over and that her life will never be the same and then she quickly forces herself to regain her composure and takes a deep breath and goes back downstairs and puts on a happy face for her kids like nothing happened. UGH.
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There are a lot of things that don’t work: hooking up with random guys, smoking, drinking, acting like I couldn’t care any less. It’s not me and it’s not working. It still hurts. I still want you.
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