acakessss

[acakessss]

Fearless by Lauren Roberts, Alternate Ending Ch. 2

My ears begin ringing as Kai calls in a young servant girl who walks in and passes something into his awaiting arms.

“Thank you Evie,” Kai says to the servant as she retreats back out of the double doors. Kai walks towards me, a wiggling bundle of blankets secured in his arms and stares down at it with a softness I haven't seen in a long time. “Kitt, I’d like to introduce you to your niece, Kitt.” He places the bundle in my lap, securely wrapping each of my arms around the child and then steps back once the baby is finally secured in my embrace. 

I stare down at– Kitt?

He must see the puzzled expression on my face as my eyes stay glued to the wiggling child. “I can’t live in a world where you don’t exist Brother.” He says quietly and I look up at him, his eyes growing sad and distant. “I didn’t know if you’d ever wake up.” He gives a weak smile that doesn’t reach his eyes.

“Well I did.” I say under my breath feeling conflicting emotions by that statement. “I haven’t held a baby since Ava.” I whisper slowly, thinking about our deceased little sister, killed by a man obsessed with power. She slaps my face, pushing away those troublesome thoughts and grips my cheek with more force than a human this small should possess. She squeals and smiles so brightly that I let out a laugh unconsciously. Is she a Brawny?

Her eyes shift to mine piercing through my very soul. The level of awareness in her gaze is frightening actually. I don’t know how much time has passes as I stare into her eyes, that baby grip still securing my face to the spot. 

“How old is she?” I push out and Kai sucks in a breath. 

“She’s 8 months old.”

Ah, that would mean she was conceived a month into my sleep which should really rattle me but holding her seems to keep my spiraling thoughts in check. But they sure didn’t waste any time. “It was unintentional Kitt," Kai says as if reading my thoughts. "But I am grateful for her. I can’t imagine our lives without her.” 

The baby squeals again, moving her other hand to slap my other cheek. She is now squeezing my cheeks together as if I am the child being held. I sigh as if a blanket of peace was just settled over me. Looking at Kitt reminds me of the joy that was my little sister Ava. I miss having her in my life.

“She looks like you.” I say, still staring at the baby with a small smile. “Kitt huh…” I feel like I might have once been jealous that my brother has another Kitt in his life, another distraction that would take him from me forever, but I can’t seem to muster up those dark feelings. She’s warm in my arms and I think it’s spreading to my heart, filling an empty crevice I didn’t realize was there until now. Until her.

The peace abruptly ends as she starts to scream and wry from my grip. Kai quickly catches her before she tumbles out of my ailing arms. 

“I think it’s time for this little one to take her afternoon nap.” Kai says into the bundle with a soothing voice. She was like a bottle stopper, securely sealing away a flood of negative emotions. Now with her out of my embrace, a flood of unresolved questions and worries begins to churn in my mind. What does Ilya know of this child– What have they been told of me?

“Two things. One” Kai holds up a finger with his free hand, ”we are getting you out of this Plague forsaken room Brother. I can think of a few people who are dying to see you. And two,” he raises his second finger before pausing, and staring at me with the intensity of the Enforcer, “You will be training with me everyday until I am convinced you will never forget the moves to our dance again.

👑

“Kitt!” Gail shouts as her ladle clatters to the kitchen floor. She runs over to me task completely forgotten. However Jax, who was sitting next to Andy on the kitchen countertop waiting for treats, beats her to my side. My little brother bounds and wraps his arms around the neck. Has he gotten taller? 

“Kitt! I’m so glad you’re awake.” He says as I start to sway, legs and arms still not at full capacity. But at least I’m not a heap on the floor.

“Woah, let’s not send him into another coma J.” Kai says jokingly as Jax steps back slightly, smiling and wiping away tears with the back of his hand. 

“Have you gotten taller little Brother?” I say to Jax but I already know the answer. He was not this tall when I last saw him.

Gail makes her way to me and gently pulls me into her arms, “Kitt, I thought I’d never see you up and well again.” She sniffles, pulling back and making sure I’m securely standing. “I’ll have to make a whole pan of sticky buns just for you.” She smiles.

“I can’t believe I’ve been asleep for 18 months.” I let out, still not believing it myself. But seeing Jax nearly my height does make it all seem real. Oh and Kai being a father. 

Andy just stares at me wide eyed as if she’s seeing a ghost still unmoving from her spot. “You’ve basically been in hibernation.” she says jokingly snapping out of her haze, her honey eyes filling with unshed tears. “We should just refer to you as the Bear from now on.” She smiles weakly.

“Being known as a bear wouldn’t be the worst thing” I say returning her smile. At that Andy jumps off the counter to embrace me. 

“Kitt I was so scared you’d never wake.” She whispers, tears now escaping her eyes. “I’m so happy cousin, the world, my world is better with you in it.” She says now staring into my eyes. “Don’t ever sleep for that long again! Even if you are a bear on the inside”. 

I chuckle softly, “I’ll remember that.” I say a bit winded. I’m somehow starting to feel tired again from all the activity of the day. It’s only been around 2 hours since I’ve awakened but it feels like 3 days have passed. 

Kai returns to my side and places his arm under my shoulders to assist me in walking like he had just a few minutes before. “Let’s get you back to your room and have that tray of sticky buns delivered to you once they are ready.” 

The castle has never felt this large before, the halls never this long. But with each corner I pass, there is a new person greeting me with excitement congratulating me for waking up. Servants, Scholars, Imperials, and Advisors alike all greet us with the brightest smiles. To be honest I didn’t think this many people would care. Yes they are dutifully bound to protect me, but it seems they are all genuinely happy that I’m still alive.

Maybe I should hibernate more often.

👑

We make it back to my room in the main wing of the palace, and I am desperate for a bath. My hair is a sweaty bird’s nest clinging to every inch of exposed sweat slicked skin. I will need to have it cut. I push off Kai and successfully walk to the bath and reach to shut the door. Kai hesitates, doubtful. 

“Brother, I think I can handle it from here.” I assure him.

“I just got you back, I don’t want you sending yourself into another year long coma because you slipped and cracked your royal head on the bath.” Kai says jokingly but I can hear the anxiety behind the joke. 

“I promise to shout if I need help” I reassure him and shut the door. 

Stepping in front of a mirror I am able to see my appearance for the first time. I look emaciated, hair now down past my shoulders, with facial hair scruffing up my face. “I look horrible” I shout loud enough for Kai to hear.

“For a man infected with the Plague, stabbed through the chest, induced into a year and a half long slumber, I’d say you look great Brother.”

👑

Well it seems my nightmares have not forgotten me either. I wake up abruptly holding back a scream as I try to blink away the image of my father’s severed neck. The image of Paedyn’s knife buried in his neck is burned into the back of my eyes. I can’t stay in this bed anymore. I get up to head to my study. I’ll write him a letter. Father would be appalled by what I’ve been through, and the fact that I’m living up to his fears. Maybe even shocked by the fact that the Scholars found a cure. Or maybe he won’t care at all. He can’t care. Not anymore.

👑

As the sun peaks over the horizon and begins pouring in through the window I hear a knock at my study door. 

“Come in.” I announce as Kai saunters in.

“Well it’s great to see you back at that desk again.” He says with a smirk leaning against the wall. “And with ink splatter all over your hands.” He tsks, “I never thought I’d miss a sight so much.” His eyes drift around the room as if remembering something and then stop at a spot on the floor. My eyes follow his gaze and...

That’s where I was, blood spewing out of me after Kai stabbed me. I guess they couldn’t get the blood completely out of the floor. The silence begins to grow heavier as we both stare at the spot. I quickly change the subject, not quite ready to revisit that reality.

“Time to train?” I ask in a brighter tone.

Kai snaps out of his daze and looks up to me, “Well I didn’t see you in your room so assumed you’d be back in here, where you belong.”

I start to step back from my desk. “How’s baby Kitt?”

“Since you last saw her yesterday? She’s fine?” He says tilting his head questioningly. He’s fighting a smile. “I was unsure how you’d respond but–”

“I’m– she’s a baby. She’s so–” I’m fighting to find the words to say. “Ava” I say finally with a sigh. “She reminds me of our sister and I want to spend more time with her. I feel like it will heal me” I try to laugh lightly.

“Well she is with her nanny Evie everyday in the early afternoon while Pae and I–” I twitch a bit hearing her name. I haven’t seen her at all since I awoke. Guess it makes sense she wouldn’t be happy to see me– “You are welcome to join her at any time.” Kai interrupts my spiraling thoughts as I make it to the door. “Now it’s time to train.”

👑

Everything hurts. Everything hurts and I’m a failure. My mind is crystal clear at least. I can clearly remember all my plans and how they have failed. I spent the first 2 hours since sunrise training with Kai, but was only able to walk a few laps around the training grounds. And with each step the weight of my failure and lack of plan cemented the fear I was trying to ward off. I have no answers. My feet bring me to the nursery where Kitt and her nanny Evie are supposed to be. Trade agreements are actively being made with the surrounding nations without my consultation. I can’t re-administer the Plague to the surrounding kingdoms without it raising suspicion and not without risking my new niece. I don’t have a plan. I can’t fail. I can’t live as a lowly king who–

The door swings open in answer to my hands that were knocking on the door without my knowledge. Evie greets me with a bright smile on her face.

“Hello Evie nice to meet–”

“Oh your Highness, it’s nice to meet you! The Prince told me you might come by to spend time with Kitt and I think that’s wonderful. Come in!” She says in haste, spinning swifty, dress twirling in the wind behind her. 

I step inside to see a brightly lit and colorful nursery. Toys are splayed all over the floor in every color. Tiny books with large pictures are littered among them, some open and others closed. And in the center of it all sits Kitt. She smiles brightly up at me squealing and clapping her hands together as I walk over and sit cross legged in front of her.

“Hello Kitt” I coo in a voice I haven’t used on anyone since Ava died. She is shaking an oddly shaped wooden toy at me and I reach over to pick up one of my own. My hair falls over my face, the toys, and the baby.

Evie giggles in the back, “Mind if I help you with that your Highness?” I look up at her a bit confused and I see she’s pointing to her hair wrapped in a tightly braided bun. I didn’t notice before but her hair is a brilliant cerulean blue. I’ve never seen someone with that hair color before. I still haven’t responded so she further clarifies, “I can tie your hair up for you.” She says with a cheerful smile. 

I nod, “Sure but I don’t think it will be here much longer. It’s only been a day and it’s uncontrollable. It was nearly choking me during my run this morning. I was constantly fighting it to keep it out of my mouth. ”

Evie giggles some more. She’s– very giggly. “I understand, I have a lot of hair so I’ve perfected the skill of securing it away.” She asserts, mocking a dutiful Imperial I assume. She walks behind my sitting form. “I have a chord I can use.”

I gasp as nails trail along my scalp.

“Oh sorry your Highness! Is this ok?” She says as she quickly removes her hands. That’s not a sound anyone has heard from me before.  

“Yeah, sorry I was just–” I exhale, “I was not expecting that.” I try to quickly recover. I have never felt nails through my scalp before. I– I think “Please continue.”

Baby Kitt continues to play with her blocks as Evie rakes through my hair. Her nails deliciously scrape along my scalp, permanently unearthing a forgotten desire buried so deep within me I hardly recognized it. She gathers my hair at the nape of my neck and wraps the leather cord securely around the strands. “Too tight?” She questions as she finishes tying the knot.

“No, that's perfect.”  I cough “Thank you Evie” I smile at her as she makes her way to the baby.

“Okay! She says excitedly, “Ready to play?!”

My hair might need to stay with me a bit longer. 

Editor’s note:

We're aware that Kai knows his way around a corset but does our dear Kitty? He was never allowed to leave the castle although there were plenty of girls at the balls. Is it safe to assume our King Kitty is a bit touch starved?

[acakessss]

Fearless by Lauren Roberts, Alternate Ending Ch. 1

An alternate ending to Fearless because I couldn't handle the real one.

Dedication: To the brotherhood I couldn’t save. 

My head.. feels like it’s seeped in mud. Was I sleeping? Opening my eyes feels like a chore, as if each lid weighs a ton. When I finally get them open, I realize I’m in the medical wing of the castle. It feels a bit dark and hard to make out the interiors, or maybe my mind is only slowly starting to piece shapes of objects together. Kai and I were just together weren’t we? We were sparring or arguing about something. Oh. 

It was about her, it’s always her. Ruining our liv-

“Oh! Oh my, you’re awake!” A maid shrieks at the foot of my bed but I can’t seem to recognize who she is. “ Your Highness, you’re awake!” I  know everyone in this castle, how do I not recognize her?

I don’t have enough time to consider my lapse in memory before she runs to open the room’s double doors and shouts,

“The King is awake! He’s awake!” She turns to one of the awaiting Imperials, “Please go get the Prince and hurry! Tell him the King has finally awakened!” She’s out of breath by the time she turns back to me, her excitement rippling off her like waves. I don’t think anyone’s ever been this excited simply because I woke up.

“Don’t worry about it”, I try to say but the words don’t ever make it past my lethargic lips. My throat feels scratchy, as if my vocal chords haven’t been used in quite some time. 

I’ll go find Kai myself. I don’t like this wing of the castle very much. I don’t need to wait. 

Wait– we were sparring and he stabbed me. And with a fire stoker at that. The plague had ruined my mind so much I couldn’t even remember a sparring routine I’ve practiced and repeated since we were children. I reach for my chest where the stab wound should be. However my arms never make it past their current location at my sides. My hands merely twitch in response to my mental command. They feel so heavy. Have I been sedated? 

I urge my legs to rescue me from this miserable bed, only for them to shuffle the blankets atop me. I don’t understand what’s happening.

I try once more and I’m finally able to leave this bed.

My body collapses onto the floor, face planting into the old dingy carpets of this infirmary. I try to look around but my neck suffices to lift my head the few inches needed to breathe in fresh air. My sight is obstructed by a sea of blonde hair, clinging to my face and sprawling across the carpet, as the servant rushes over. 

“What the hell?”

I'm finally able to let out grunts that start to resemble words. My limbs won’t seem to listen to me. I’m a jumbled heap on the floor, a lowly king with a fraying decaying mind and now failing body. This is all my fault. I thought I was strong enough to resist the plague but it seems to have completely atrophied every aspect of my being. 

But my mind actually feels–  less clouded. Somehow clearer, even if by a hair, than it had before. Before– 

“Your Highness!” The maid shouts as she rushes over to lift me.

“How long was I asleep for?” That one was closest to resembling words but I doubt she could understand me. She tries to help me up but is unable to bear my weight. After her attempt, I’m a heap on the floor again.

“Please, your Highness, the Prince will explain everything. For now let’s just get you back into bed. He’s actually been here nonstop everyday, it just so happens he had to step out for–” The servant pauses her speech sounding a bit unsure.

Ah right, it must be Paedyn he’s had to rush out for. Even the staff know of his love for her. Will she be forever a thorn in my side. A blight I can seem to escape.

“Kitt!” I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding. My whole mood shifts as I hear Kai’s voice.

“Kitty you’re awake” He exclaims as he lifts me off the floor and embraces me. “I thought I killed you Kit” He cries into the hug, “I thought I killed you.”

Right he stabbed me while– defending Paetyn.

“Kitt I’m so happy you are alive” Kai continues as he raises me back to the bed. He leans my back onto the pillows and then reaches down to lift my legs back onto the bed, with tears streaming down his cheeks.

“What’s going on Kai?” This time I know my words are clear enough to understand.

“There is so much to explain… honestly there’s too much. I don’t know where to start.” He’s running his hands through his hair as if he’s nervous, but still smiling and sounding breathless, like he ran back here as soon as he could. He runs his hands down his tear streaked face. He looks to the servant and nods for her to leave. 

“You’re awake” Kai says relieved, like the largest weight was just flung from his shoulders.

“Please”, I push out. What is going on–

“You’ve been asleep for a year and a half, Kitt.”

I snap my head in his direction, well more like tilt in his direction. I stare into his grey eyes trying to understand what he just said. A–

“Yuuear”

“After I stabbed you and you lost consciousness, I thought you were gone. You were bleeding out in my arms but Paedyn was able to retrieve a Healer before your heart stopped. As soon as I felt their power I was able to start healing you. When the healer arrived in the room, we were able to heal your injuries but you still wouldn’t wake up. We didn’t know if you had lost too much blood but we believe the plague was preventing you from healing properly and regaining consciousness.”

Kai is pacing around the room hands in hair as he recounts the events of that night.

“So we moved you to the infirmary where Healers periodically tended to you. We found your letters and…Then a few days after that the Scholars found a cure for the plague!” He looks up smiling, but his smile starts to fall as he says, “But, if administered it would put you into a deep sleep. And they didn’t know how long or if you’d ever wake up.” Kai trails off sounding more hollow, reliving the lapse in time when it was unsure if the King would ever open his eyes again.

I just stare up at him trying to process the flood of information. My brain is still moving at a glacial pace.

“They gave you doses every day for a month. The dark veins in your face began to disappear, the color returning to your cheeks, and the dark circles under your eyes lessened. It looked to be working but a week had passed after their last dose and you still wouldn’t wake up. So we just waited. And I–” Kai starts to get choked up again pausing.

“I was starting to believe you would never wake up brother” His hands have now drifted to the back of his neck, then through his hair again, “But you are awake.” he finishes quietly.

“I’m awake after a year and a half” I say astonished, staring off into nothing. Thankfully those words sounded as they should. “What about everyone, the kingdom, my plans with–”

“Queen Zailah figured out something was wrong with the roses before allowing them to infect her Kingdom.” Kai cuts him off. “She figured Paetyn had nothing to do with it and so didn’t take action against our Kingdom. The two seem to have developed a bond.” Kai says thinking back to some event I have no recollection of. “ We have established a trade route with them and the first shipment arrives sometime next week.”

I start to grimace. My plans for a great Ilya are failing, have failed and everyone loves her. But I can’t seem to rile up the hatred I previously had towards her. Her name seems to sting less every time I hear it.

Noticing my reaction Kai opens his mouth to say something but I interrupt.

“So my plans have failed.” My head is spinning, jumping around like I wish my body would. 

“Kitt the kingdom is thriving. It was a blessing that your plan to infect Izram failed.” Kai responds, shaking his head. “You weren’t thinking straight before. The Plague was fraying your mind–”

“But I can still start with Dor” I barely hear Kai as I murmur I’m lost in a different approach to achieve my plans. I can spread the Plague to Dor and–

“Kitt the Plague nearly killed you!” Kai yells. “If it hadn’t been me stabbing you, that Plague would have finished the job.” Kai fumes “You were talking to people that weren’t there. You were irate and easily agitated. You weren’t you brother.” Kai motions to me beseechingly.

“Oh the easy going, kind Kitt. So weak and soft and a failure of an heir.” I yell through creaking vocal chords that finally obey me. “This can’t fail Kai you don’t understand! I have to be better than our father. I can’t exist as a disappointment. You were everything he wanted, powerful. While I was a meek, feeling obedient child, running to do his every command and still falling short.” I push through shaky breath, lifting heavy hands to clench my chest. “Brother you have to understand. I have to–” I heave, quickly exhausting my body. 

“Kitt, those are all the things I love about you, we all love about you. You are not a failure. Stop trying to live up to the man that killed our sister!” Kai shouts back. “And for what? For his obsession with power. Fear of not being weak?”

“She was just a child” I say more quietly thinking. “That’s why she died, she was too young to handle–”

“Kitt” Kai interrupts, “You almost died. The Plague was eating at your body and mind. If it weren’t for the healers who found a cure, you’d be dead!”

I shake my head “No, no”, there has to be a way. It has to work. Every city on our maps will be ours and I will rule them all. A truly boundless Elite kingdom far greater than my father could ever achieve. I stare down at my hands hoping a plan will materialize in them. If only my head was a little clearer–

“Whether you understand that or not doesn’t matter.” Kai says, interrupting my thoughts. “Because I won’t let you use that Plague again.”

I look up at Kai astonished. Doesn’t he understand I am doing this for us? Oh “It’s because of her isn’t it. Don’t want the Plague to kill your beloved.”

Kai straightens. “She is of course a reason why. But there is one more thing I must tell you brother.”

I stare at him dumbfounded. He still doesn’t understand–

“I have a daughter Kitt.”

I think I stopped breathing

“And unlike our father, I will not risk her life for the pursuit of power.”

My mind goes blank.

Editor Notes:

This is my first fanfic ever I hope you enjoy! I consumed the series via audiobook so I might have gotten name spellings wrong. I plan to continue this fic and add images and videos.

Feel free to read the reddit post I made about my opinions on the ending. It cut me deep Shrek.

https://www.reddit.com/r/fantasyromance/comments/1jymkiy/fearless_by_lauren_roberts_ending_discussion/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button