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[acertainmoshke]

While Cold Iron is mature in terms of violence but light on the romance, I intend to have some steamy scenes in Halara. And I am so excited to describe a naked orc body for the challenge I set myself: in order to avoid the binary gendering of an inherently nonbinary society, I refuse to give any hints about what agab any character would have in our world. Which means there will be lots of hot backs, shoulders, and of course the soul-representing hair.

[acertainmoshke]

When ogres travel, they do so in human shape.

They hate doing this. They think it’s beneath them. But they do it anyway.

The Vicomte Graoul de Saucisson – and this is another thing about ogres. Ogres as a species are nobility. There is no such thing as a low-born ogre. There is always room in the ogrish peerage for another vicomte, another prince, another branch to tie to the rotted tree – strode up to the chateau in human shape. The roses in the garden shivered as he passed by. The huge, high doors opened by themselves and he walked through them without a shift in his stride.

When the doors slammed shut behind him, he moved to shrug the shape off his shoulders like a coat.

Then he saw the woman.

He froze. He stared. She stared back.

He slowly pulled the shape back on. “Who are you?” he asked.

She looked mildly appalled. “Who are you?” she asked. “What are you doing in my home?”

“Your home? This is–” He stopped. He reconsidered. “I am the Vicomte de Saucisson,” he said. “I’m looking for the Marquis de Pamplemousse. He is a… colleague of mine.”

“Oh,” she said. She could’ve looked more abashed. “I’m sorry, monsieur, he’s never mentioned you before. You must be here to share your congratulations, of course, I can fetch him right away.”

“He’s never mentioned you either,” the vicomte did not say. “Of course,” he said. “Congratulations. What about?”

She looked surprised. “Have you not heard? Monsieur, the curse on my husband has been lifted.”

He stared. His lips started to form the words “What curse,” and then there was a sound like a horse falling down a set of stairs and a man he had never seen before wearing the marquis’s clothes came barrelling down the hall.

“Vicomte!” said the man with the marquis’s voice. “My human friend! The curse has been lifted, and I am a human once again!”

He was slightly out of breath when he reached the woman. He clasped her arm and grinned at him with manic desperation. “This is wonderful news! You must be here to share your congratulations!”

“Lie like hell,” said the man’s eyes.

The vicomte stared. “Oh!” he said. “My – human friend! Human once again! Words fail me. After all these–” (there was the slightest hesitation) “–years?”

The woman put her head at an angle and narrowed her eyes at him.

The man walked up, still grinning like a rictus chimpanzee, and clasped a hand on his shoulder. “Yes, of course! Darling, me and the vicomte are going to have a manly one-on-one conversation while he shares his congratulations, as we human men are wont to do.” And then with a strength that could only be ogrish, the marquis pulled the vicomte by the shoulder down the hall and into a drawing room.

When the bolt of the lock clicked into place behind them, the man wearing the marquis’s clothes visibly sagged.

“What the hell,” said the vicomte.

“You should’ve sent word ahead that you'd be coming today.”

“I never do.” He gesticulated and tried to conjure a single question out of the swarm buzzing in his brain. “What the hell is going on? Who was that? Why are you pretending to be human? What curse are we talking about?”

The marquis groaned and crumpled into a chair. As he did he shifted out of human shape, clothes magically tailoring themselves to contain his ogrish form. He looked a bit like a moose crossed with a wolf.

“I had a moment of weakness.”

“Are you sure it wasn’t a stroke?”

“I got married.”

“And that’s another thing–”

“Graoul, please.” He sighed and put his face in his talons. “Last winter a merchant broke into my home. He stole one of my roses, and in exchange I asked him to send me one of his daughters to be my bride.”

The vicomte nodded. This at least was a sacred and recognizable ogrish custom, and he did like to see the old ways in practice.

“And it was fine! It was perfectly lovely. She’s a wonderful woman, but one night I decided to put on a human shape to change things up in the bedroom, and she lost her mind! Started talking about how I was clearly an enchanted prince and that her love for me must’ve broken some curse and turned me human again! I had no idea how to tell her otherwise, and now I’ve done it for too long to back out.”

The vicomte stared. “Sorry,” he said. “You decided to turn into a human to spice things up in the bedroom, and that was the face you chose?”

The marquis growled. “If I knew I was going to be wearing it for the rest of my life I would’ve gone with something better.”

[acertainmoshke]

halflings love their new giant children

[acertainmoshke]

Jumbo Ask Game

Relationships

💖 Has your OC ever been in love, be it romantic or platonic or otherwise? Who with and did they ever express their feelings or keep it private? How long did these feelings persist / do they still feel this way?

❌ What kind of things would end any relationship for them? Is there a history behind why these things bother them? Could they ever take someone back despite this? If so or if not, why?

💋 How affectionate are they with their friends? Their family? Their romantic partner(s) (if they have any)? Are they more physical or emotional when it comes to displaying their affection? Why?

🌹 How easy is it for them to connect with others and make friends? On the flip side how easy is it for them to make an enemy of someone? Are they the kind of person who hangs around the food table at a party and never talks to anyone or are they the type who can talk to anyone?

🍒 What kind of things do they expect from their relationships? Does this differ between platonic relationships and romantic ones? Is your OC “demanding” or a door mat? What kinds of things do people expect from them in a relationship?

Preferences

🔥 Give us a list of general likes and dislikes, such as colours, textures, music, weather and other stuff!

🍊 What is your OC’s favourite meal? Snack? Dessert? Drink? Any reasons behind this besides liking how it tastes?

What is your OC’s most hated food? Stuff they can’t stand to eat or drink?

🍑 Where is your OC’s favourite place to relax or calm down? Recount a story of their time spent in this place! What makes it so special to them?

Is there anywhere your OC hates to go to? Anywhere that stresses them out or have negative memories of?

🧡 Who is your OC’s favourite person? Why is this person the top of their list and have they actually met them (an idol or rolemodel or celeb can be someone’s favourite after all!).

Who does your OC absolutely hate, the one person who they’d sell to Satan for one corn chip? Why do they loathe this person so?

📙 What kind of subjects (of conversation, of discussion, in school or whatever) does your OC find interesting or engaging or that they can talk for hours about? What kind of stuff do they just find fun?

What things bore your OC to tears and they couldn’t care less about? Why?

Emotions

😊 What can make your OC smile even when they’re feeling down? What cheers them up and makes everything feel better for them? Is your OC genrally a happy person and do they enjoy making others smile? What about your OC makes others happy?

⭐ What is your OC afraid of? Any crippling phobias or some such? How do they act when scared and what helps them calm down? Does anyone ever find your OC scary? Why?

🍋 Does your OC act petty and jealous easily? What sort of things make them feel like this and do they experience guilt for getting so worked up? How do they deal with these emotions when they get them? If your OC doesn’t feel like this often, why not?

📀 How easy is it to shock your OC? To confuse them? To lie to them, to manipulate them? How are they with feelings of trust? Can your OC be trusted?

💛 In general, how in control of their emotions is your OC? Do they have a good hold on them or do their emotions control them, not the other way around? What do you think is the reason behind this and is your OC ever concerned about their lack of or good control?

Mental Health

🌳 Compare your OC to themself from 10 years ago. How has their mental state changed since then, how have they aged and grown up? Would they say they’re in a better place than they were back then or do they need help? What advice would they give their younger self? What advice would their younger self give to them now?

🍏 Does your OC have any triggers? What is the history behind these triggers and are they related to any disorders or mental illnesses? In what ways does your OC react to being triggered?

🥝 What does a bad mental health day look like for your OC? Walk us through it with them. What kind of things can help them out of this slump and what kinds of things comfort them when they start to feel like this?

🍐 What is your OC’s mentality? Are they overall positive? Negative? A bit of both? Describe their thought patterns and reasoning behind their choice making!

💚 Talk about some of the traumatic events in your OC’s life. These events can be ones that have happened to them or a loved one. These events can be minor or major.

History

💧 What is the earliest memory your OC can recall? Do they know what their first words were or remember where they took their first steps? Do they have any mementos of their childhood they’ve kept such as a stuffed toy or tiny baby clothes?

🌠 Who was your OC’s first friend? Do they remember them or are they still friends now? Talk about some of the people your OC has lost contact with over the years. Do they have any regrets about losing these people and would they revist them if they could?

💙 What did your OC want to be when they grew up and why? Did they have any lifelong dreams or ambitions they never got to work on or are they currently working to achieve this dream? Has their life taken a very unexpected turn and put all these plans on hold for a while or have they given up on any dreams?

🌀 Where is your OC from? Where were they born? Do they still live there, if not why did they move? If they still live in the area how has it changed since their childhood? How many places has your OC lived in and where has been their favourite?

💤 What was your OC like as a baby, a child and as a teen? (if your OC is a teen or a child, what will they be like as an adult?). How have they changed since then? What lessons have they learned and what things about their youth do they miss the most? Do they have any general regrets?

This or That

🍇 Day or Night? Sun or Rain? Summer or Winter?

🛍️ Function or Aesthetic? Skirts or Pants? Heels or Flats?

🔮 Star gazing or cloud watching? Hand-holding or snuggles? Early mornings or late nights?

💜 Music or Silence? Swords or Spells? Cities or Nature?

🍆 Tea or Coffee or Hot Chocolate? Sweet or Spicy? Fruits or Vegetables?

Features

🌸 What does your OC’s voice sound like? Their laugh? Are they good at singing? Do they have an accent?

🎀 Do they wear a specific accessory with a special meaning behind it? What is their usual fashion sense like? What do they wear when they want to be comfortable and what do they wear when they’re going to a fancy party? Or do they just not care?

💗 What would your OC say is their best feature? Why? What do their friends / family / lover(s) / people they know think is their best feature and why?

🌺 Does your OC have any tattoos or other body art? Does their body art have any specific meaning behind it? Do they have any scars? How did they get those scars? Any birthmarks?

🌷 In what ways would your OC alter their body if they could? How would they do it using mundane means (hair dye, surgery, make-up?). What is their ideal look for themself?

[acertainmoshke]

[acertainmoshke]

Heartbreaking: This person is making great points but they're being a huge fucking asshole about it so you can't reblog any of it

[acertainmoshke]

I do not want to be in writing training

I am thinking about making a passionate defense of the passive voice just to cause trouble on purpose

Look once you learn how to use the passive voice it will become clear to you why I spend half my time deliberately writing in it

[acertainmoshke]

To do something positive on top of all this, if you're a writer of color, can you reblog and share something about yourself or your writing projects? Links so people can check them out would be great too!

It's not just about dunking on racists but making sure the stories that need to be heard are heard.

[White people are free to reblog to boost]

[acertainmoshke]

ANDROMEDA ROGUE ☆ a space fantasy by CHAY LUNA

              -the first installment in the andromeda trilogy

☆ GENRE | new adult, space fantasy

☆ POV | third person limited, alternating

☆ THEMES & TROPES | space quests | funky space plants | pseudo-scientific futuristic bullshit | the complexities of blood family | the delights of found family | the exploitation of nature and its consequences | cover ups and conspiracies | begrudging crewmates to reluctantly mutually pining idiots | two aces in space, a pretty fly bi guy, and an unhinged lesbian

☆ WARNINGS | mentions of war | mentions of death | mentions of past emotional & psychological abuse | panic attacks | genre-appropriate violence | brief mentions of/allusions to drugs, alcohol, and sex (to be updated)

☆ SYNOPSIS

over twenty years after an interplanetary war fought over a plant with extraordinary properties–used both for healing and destruction–ended with the signing of the Neo-Interplanetary Alliance Treaty, six planet nations live in relative peace under the supervision of the Alliance Council.

on the planet of Sayntagnesia, a brilliant young aspiring xenobotanist, Petra, snags her very first gig with the Alliance-sponsored Interplanetary Environmental Research Association: leading a small expedition to the less explored corners of the sector to search for a special plant. however, she finds herself at the head of a mismatched, unqualified team, with down-on-his-luck criminal Finneas reluctantly serving as the pilot; the rebellious daughter of an Alliance councilor, Azami; and Petra’s own clingy younger sibling Valyan stepping in as a last minute replacement.

as Petra struggles to make the best of what she is given and fulfill her duties to the IERA, it soon becomes clear that there may be more to this expedition than simple research, and she, as well as the rest of the team, must set aside differences and personal convictions to get to the truth–and stop a growing threat to the Alliance’s era of peace.

☆ CHARACTERS

PETRA LACROYE | 21, she/her. the inquisitive and hardworking mind placed at the head of the expedition, Petra is always prepared for a challenge, especially in the name of science–but what she’s willing to do in the name of truth has yet to be tested.

FINNEAS BECKER | 22, he/him. a criminal with exceptional piloting skills, Finneas is dragged into serving the IERA to escape a worse sentence and must keep his unwanted plant-based powers hidden from those who might seek to exploit them.

AZAMI BLACK-MIZUHARA | 20, she/her. with two high profile public figures from vastly different planet nations as parents, Azami is desperate to flee the suffocating expectations set on her–and this trip might be just the place to do it.

VALYAN LACROYE | 19, they/them. behind that ever-present smile, Valyan is secretly terrified of being separated from their older sister and gladly steps in to fill a last-minute vacancy, but their cheerful façade is threatened in the face of new trials.

☆ LINKS | wip page | wip tags [book 1] [book 2] [book 3] [series] | full navigation post

☆ OTHER BOOKS IN THE SERIES | book 2 | book 3

ask to be on the taglist! the same list will be used for all the books in the series.

[acertainmoshke]

Being a novelist is just adding a bunch of other extraneous bullshit onto playing dollies

[acertainmoshke]

Especially if they’re proper adults who can put their feelings aside but don’t want to

I know I was just complaining about romantic dynamics, but you know what the best romantic dynamic is?

Former lovers who are still kind of in love but not together for practical reasons.

[acertainmoshke]

I know I was just complaining about romantic dynamics, but you know what the best romantic dynamic is?

Former lovers who are still kind of in love but not together for practical reasons.

[acertainmoshke]

YALL. Holly Black has a list of resources she's used for writing her books on the fair folk. I'm OBSESSED. I love her work and world building. it's so true to the heart of faeries

[acertainmoshke]

Top-Tier Villain Motivations

They will be safe. It doesn't matter who else or what else burns as long as They will be safe.

I will be safe. The hunger and the cold will never touch me again.

Fuck any bitch who's prettier(/cooler/better-liked/better at making dumplings) than me.

Yes, Master

Love me. Love me. Love me. Love me. LOVE ME!

I know the terrible things these so-called "heroes" will do if I don't stop them (<- is absolutely wrong)

I don't want a better future, I want a better past!

No other way to get performance art funded these days

[acertainmoshke]

Here's a poll I've tried to make hyperspecfic

I have an extra (bit of) bone

I've been in the newspaper at least twice

My date of birth has the same number for day, month, and year

I had four teeth removed to make room for my wisdom teeth

I once went into an exam thinking it was one I had missed

Two of my immediate family share a birthday but are different ages

I walked into a chair at the end of my dyspraxia assessment

I am attempting university for a second time (with a different focus)

My siblings share the same blood type (I don't)

Multiple of these apply to me

None of these apply to me

Uncertainty/results

[acertainmoshke]

Hey artists, C. Spike Trotman, founder of Iron Circus Comics, just posted an invaluable thread on depicting different types of black hair. I’d do the thing where you screencap the whole thread and post it but it’s just too long (which is great because it’s a whole lot of useful information!) Give her a follow while you’re there.

Anyway, go check it out. I just wanted to save it and share it because I didn’t know how much I didn’t know!

[acertainmoshke]

It is just a tad annoying that gentle soft touch has become such a signifier of romantic intentions in stories that it’s nearly impossible to have it in a platonic way, especially between related characters, without it seeming wrong. But, like, in our culture certain things are definitively romantic, or at least sexual: kissing and sex and related touch in between. But other gentle touches should not be an indicator of. Anything. (At least definitively; I do love a gentle touch in my romance plot too)