ae-diaries

[ae-diaries]

Officially Stepping into My New Era today!

Watching Taylor Swift's Eras tour multiple times online got me reflecting on my own life eras – as I too have experienced significant shifts over the past few years. So here's a trip down memory lane. Daming chika nito 🤣

One of my greatest dreams in life is to work as an OFW abroad, especially in Japan. This seed of dream began to take shape in 2013 when it was first planted in my heart by God. But, I knew there's a lot to improve, so for several years I chose to gain experience and dedicate my service in different companies and institutions to develop a well-rounded skill set. Over time, this seed grew within me, making me feel uncomfortable and unsettled.

They say that dreams don't work unless you do. So, in December 2020, I took a leap of faith and applied through my target agency. Upon meeting the qualifications, I made the life-altering decision to step out of my comfort zone and explore further. It was undeniably scary, but I knew that I'd regret it if I didn't give myself this chance. After all, why settle for less if I can be more? 🤭

Unbeknownst to many, the path toward pursuing my dream started with a messy era in 2021. I hit what felt like my own version of rock bottom.

Sh* happened. Quarter-life crisis, heartbreak, burning regrets, and pandemic woes.

Japan closed its borders due to Covid-19, leaving my application status stuck in limbo. I even tested positive for the virus during the surge, subjecting me to social stigma. I lost my balance. I wanted to shrink. Amid all that, a traumatic experience, bigger than these overshadowed all my personal battles.

The first quarter of 2022 was turbulent. My father's life hung in the balance for two agonizing months. I stepped up for my family, acting as my father's quad cane in the hospital, as any good child would. We felt like we were drowning, yet the prayers and support from those around us buoyed us to the surface.

During the season of waiting and setbacks, I felt I wasn't much fruitful. But hey, those moments taught me a big lesson: surrendering everything I couldn't control to God. And guess what happened next? Things started falling into place, leading me straight to better days.

2023. Just like Teytey being named 'Time Person of the Year', I'd say this was my year too! My breakthrough era. A dream that began a decade ago finally became reality— I'm now living and working in Japan beyond my wildest dreams.

Who says achieving this in your thirties isn't possible? I used to be that person tbh.

At my age, I never thought this would still be possible. Parang di ako makapaniwalang mangyayari pa ang lahat ng ito. A few months before my flight, I had this internal battle. I doubted so much if:

"Kaya ko pa ba?''

"Is it worth it?"

''Deserve ko ba talaga ito?"

"Paano kung yung saya ko of all the good things I'm receiving ay may kasunod na namang pagsubok?".

I'm a failure in so many things. Hindi naman ako magaling. Courageous at ambisyosa 😂 lang.

But time and time again, I've seen GOD WORKING IN MY LIFE (during high and lows). It's His grace that brought me here and sustains me.

Connecting the dots, I now understand why certain things were delayed —

To lean on God.

To humble me.

To honor my parents.

To focus on the present.

To spend more time with my niblings.

To further serve my school community.

To complete my thesis and graduate with my MA.

And to prepare me for the next chapter.

Just like plants growing after rain, my willpower has grown too. I've realized that this resilience is the true fruit of my journey.

Behind the scenes, I couldn't do this alone. I owe about 90% of being here to the incredible support from my family, besties, friends, colleagues, students, former teachers & professors, govt. folks, and my agency. 'Grateful' feels like an understatement.

And hey, huge thanks to Past Aemira for trusting the process and God's timing. We fought dragons together! And you never gave up! Proud of you, self!

So, here's to launching Aem(Era) version 3.4 🤣 this year, with a grateful heart.

Whatever 2024 brings, I entrust it all to you, Lord!

Thank you all for your warm greetings!

Feeling overwhelmed that I couldn't help but share my journey to Japan in this short video clip. It's something I'll look back on fondly.

#January2

[ae-diaries]

Officially Stepping into My New Era today!

Watching Taylor Swift's Eras tour multiple times online got me reflecting on my own life eras – as I too have experienced significant shifts over the past few years. So here's a trip down memory lane. Daming chika nito 🤣

One of my greatest dreams in life is to work as an OFW abroad, especially in Japan. This seed of dream began to take shape in 2013 when it was first planted in my heart by God. But, I knew there's a lot to improve, so for several years I chose to gain experience and dedicate my service in different companies and institutions to develop a well-rounded skill set. Over time, this seed grew within me, making me feel uncomfortable and unsettled.

They say that dreams don't work unless you do. So, in December 2020, I took a leap of faith and applied through my target agency. Upon meeting the qualifications, I made the life-altering decision to step out of my comfort zone and explore further. It was undeniably scary, but I knew that I'd regret it if I didn't give myself this chance. After all, why settle for less if I can be more? 🤭

Unbeknownst to many, the path toward pursuing my dream started with a messy era in 2021. I hit what felt like my own version of rock bottom.

Sh* happened. Quarter-life crisis, heartbreak, burning regrets, and pandemic woes.

Japan closed its borders due to Covid-19, leaving my application status stuck in limbo. I even tested positive for the virus during the surge, subjecting me to social stigma. I lost my balance. I wanted to shrink. Amid all that, a traumatic experience, bigger than these overshadowed all my personal battles.

The first quarter of 2022 was turbulent. My father's life hung in the balance for two agonizing months. I stepped up for my family, acting as my father's quad cane in the hospital, as any good child would. We felt like we were drowning, yet the prayers and support from those around us buoyed us to the surface.

During the season of waiting and setbacks, I felt I wasn't much fruitful. But hey, those moments taught me a big lesson: surrendering everything I couldn't control to God. And guess what happened next? Things started falling into place, leading me straight to better days.

2023. Just like Teytey being named 'Time Person of the Year', I'd say this was my year too! My breakthrough era. A dream that began a decade ago finally became reality— I'm now living and working in Japan beyond my wildest dreams.

Who says achieving this in your thirties isn't possible? I used to be that person tbh.

At my age, I never thought this would still be possible. Parang di ako makapaniwalang mangyayari pa ang lahat ng ito. A few months before my flight, I had this internal battle. I doubted so much if:

"Kaya ko pa ba?''

"Is it worth it?"

''Deserve ko ba talaga ito?"

"Paano kung yung saya ko of all the good things I'm receiving ay may kasunod na namang pagsubok?".

I'm a failure in so many things. Hindi naman ako magaling. Courageous at ambisyosa 😂 lang.

But time and time again, I've seen GOD WORKING IN MY LIFE (during high and lows). It's His grace that brought me here and sustains me.

Connecting the dots, I now understand why certain things were delayed —

To lean on God.

To humble me.

To honor my parents.

To focus on the present.

To spend more time with my niblings.

To further serve my school community.

To complete my thesis and graduate with my MA.

And to prepare me for the next chapter.

Just like plants growing after rain, my willpower has grown too. I've realized that this resilience is the true fruit of my journey.

Behind the scenes, I couldn't do this alone. I owe about 90% of being here to the incredible support from my family, besties, friends, colleagues, students, former teachers & professors, govt. folks, and my agency. 'Grateful' feels like an understatement.

And hey, huge thanks to Past Aemira for trusting the process and God's timing. We fought dragons together! And you never gave up! Proud of you, self!

So, here's to launching Aem(Era) version 3.4 🤣 this year, with a grateful heart.

Whatever 2024 brings, I entrust it all to you, Lord!

Thank you all for your warm greetings!

Feeling overwhelmed that I couldn't help but share my journey to Japan in this short video clip. It's something I'll look back on fondly.

#January2,1990

[ae-diaries]

2022 in REVIEW

Had this in my drafts for so long. I'm a list-type-of-girl so I listed what God has done in the past year. Para mayroon din naman akong good memories and lessons na babalikbalikan. Now, I finally have the time to post it.

My birth month is already over. It became my favorite tradition to write my year-end reflections but I didn't have time doing this last December to February because I put my focus and energy on my loved ones, constants, and work.

Looking back, 2022 was tough, but I was tougher. It wasn't easy. At least for me. Madami akong iniiyak sa year na ito: my family's health issues, quarter-life crisis, and silent battles. They were too much to handle. Yet in those unbearably hard times, I never give up and lose hope knowing that God was holding the other end of the rope. Indeed, it has always been His grace and the people He used that saved and buoyed me to the surface that I will always be immensely grateful for.

Despite the stormy sea, God has won more victories in my life through and through. Those tough times gave me the opportunity to exercise my tenacity and draw me closer to God.

I LEARNED na may baon pa pala akong lakas kahit feeling ko ubos na ubos na ako, may bigla na lang dumarating na tulong at malasakit kapag feeling mo walang wala ka na at may Diyos na yayakapin ka at hindi ka pababayaan kapag feeling mo hindi mo na kaya.

I REALIZED that uncertainties will come along the way, but one thing is certain - He is always faithful to his promises. And that's what I want to fix my eyes on this 2023: the lens of 3Gs (Gratitude and God's Grace).

Ended the year with inner peace and gratitude.

I could say lahat ng pagsubok na pinagdaanan ko at ng pamilya ko ay may magandang kapalit. Photos (with caption) below wrapped up the higlights of my 2022. #SKL 😜

1. TATAY'S HOSPITALIZATION

(Me in the photo..after humagulhol to surrender Tatay's condition to Jesus...and to his doctors.)

The first quarter was truuuuly a turbulent period for our family. I was drowning in fear because of so many terrifying episodes during my father's hospitalization. And the worst part of it is when the doctors offered immediate intubation for tatay on the night of Feb. 13 because of his decrease in sensorium. At this moment, I exploded in tears as I/we prayed and surrendered his condition to Jesus. But what happened next was a testament of God's miracle: Tatay slowly opened his eyes a few hours before his intubation! Truth be told, you will never know that God is all you need, when God is all you have. Sa panahong hopeless kana, dito mo malalamang may Diyos ka nga pala na kumikilos. You just have to place your full trust and faith in Him. He is way maker, promise keeper and miracle worker. I also met the best and the most compassionate doctors He used as instruments.

It's humbling to say that serving my father is what I considered my biggest achievement in 2022. Nothing else comes close.

It was also in this season that my elder sister and her fam abroad got Covid-19. But then again, they made it through by God's grace.

2. ELYU TRAVEL

In April, a week after my father was discharged, I went on an unexpected solo trip to SFLU out of necessity. I felt God also brought me here to breathe, clear my mind off things, calm my storms, and somehow, reward me for what I'd been through. Dasurv? 😂

3. BABY MEGAN WAS BORN

3. In July 21, my sister gave birth to Baby Megan, my third niece. She's a rainbow baby. A new bundle of joy to our ever growing family.

However, it was also the month where Tatay got Covid-19 and I fell ill, too. My anxiety was kicking in again, but later on I realized, "Kelan ba kami pinabayaan ng Dyos?" He has always been faithful to us. We wouldn't survive this without Him.

4. THE RETURN OF F2F CLASSES

And then come August, the return of F2F classes. I feel blessed to have met a new breed of awesome learners under my care. They have brought context to my world.

5. A MASTER'S DEGREE HOLDER

And I never thought that despite my busyness and clutter at work, I would be able to have my thesis completed and finally received my master's degree at the Philippine Christian University at the same time. One for the books!

6. ALYESSA'S MILESTONE

In the same month, Alyessa, my younger sister, finally started her career abroad. I couldn't be more proud of her milestone. Pautang naman sis. 😂

7. BABY GIA'S CHRISTENING & 1ST BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION

We also celebrated baby Gia's (my second adorable niece) first birthday and christening last September. It was way memorable! (without lockdown and less restrictions, too)

8. ONE OF MY BIGGEST DREAMS WAS GRANTED!

Last October 24, I received an email - this I considered an early xmas gift from God - an answered prayer that I'd been longing to hear! All of my efforts and hardwork were all worth it.

9. A WELL-SPENT FAMILY VACATION

And last December became one of the most memorable Year-End parties we had in our fam. Plus, my eldest sister and her fam had finally spent their Christmas vacation in PH after 13 years. Everything was surreal. ❤️ Grateful is an understatement.

An dami kong drama, nag-bday lang naman ako. 😅

My wish? I didn't have anything in particular because all of the things that I'm experiencing right now are my answered prayers in the past. I put 2023 in Your hands.

#HERYear #Januarygirl #post-bday

[ae-diaries]

This was posted on my IG account.

I haven't posted in awhile because my life, in the past few months, was not ig worthy. I was drowning in pain and fear. I felt that a part of me was dying. So many tense episodes happened during my father's hospitalization. Mahirap palang i-share ang mga ganitong agaw buhay eksenang akala mo sa pelikula mo lang makikita like when tatay was on a vegetative state, hindi mo alam kung gigising pa sya; also, when the doctors told you na poor prognosis na, plus sabay-sabay ang infections, pneumonia to the point na kailangan na syang iintubate and the list goes on. Needless to say, I embraced pain and the pain of others, too. It was heart-breaking to witness a patient dying next to our room or a patient who's undergoing dialysis or chemotherapy. 😭 These and more terrifying scenes frightened me everyday but I (being the sole watcher) chose to battle it silently with God beside me.

Now that we're already out of the woods, I began to have processed everything and finally decided to share this vid. Hindi man masaya, puno ng pagsubok but I think it is human worthy. Loaded with life lessons, realizations and blessings parin. I couldn't count the number of times God always sends help. He surrounded me with generous people and great doctors who showed me what's possible. I can never repay them but I like to pay it forward thru this vid.

There are no captions on this vid cos the pain we felt is indescribable. This is just a living proof that my trust and faith in God soared in this journey.

[ae-diaries]

Helplessness is the birthplace of miracles. - Bo Sanchez

It's a bit rocket science but our family's story is a testament to that. It was the most difficult and frightening time when the doctors offered intubation for Tatay last February 13, 2022.

After his terrifying seizure episodes, what came next was his decreased in sensorium and infections. It was heart-breaking to see that he couldn't wake up for more than a week.

The doctors clearly explained that this would serve as airway protection. At first, we dropped the offer and waited for another 24 hrs with hopes na baka naman sakaling gigising na si Tatay kasi nagbawas na ng gamot ang Neuro nya. Throughout the day, I did my best to wake him up but I failed to do so. I felt deep down that Tatay is going to wake up and come back to us real soon. But at that moment, our only hope was a miracle.

All I could pray was, "Dear God, please extend my father's life. Gusto pa po namin syang makasama ng matagal. Hindi pa po kami handa. Kung magmimilagro po kayo, sana po ipakita nyo na sa mga oras na ito."

But He seemed so distant. 😢

I still vividly remember the night of February 14. I asked for a vc with my fam kasi nakikita kong kakaiba na ung paghinga ni Tatay and I feared na baka lalo kong pagsisihan kapag wala parin kaming gagawing decision sa mga oras nayun. The risks outweigh the benefits if we let the days pass without this intubation thing. And so my fam thru vc finally decided to continue fighting for Tatay's life. Ilalaban na namin ito kung hanggang saan may makarating. Saan ba kami lulugar? We knew we had no choice, and so we finally surrenderred Tatay's condition to Jesus

After our vc, I shook my head for a while and exploded in tears before God uncontrollably. It was so painful I can hardly describe how I felt. Nanay Nora and Nanay Ethel (watchers like me) saw my crying and comforted me right away. I owe them so much for this. They somehow calmed my brokenness and reminded me that God was always beside me.

In my helplessness, something miraculous happened. Truly God is an 11:59 God. After my conversation with nanays, just when I was about to go out of our room to give my consent to the doctors, lo and behold, Tatay slowly opened his eyes and wake up consistently! That was the miracle that we'd been waiting for! To me and my fam, the fact that he opened his eyes was already a medical miracle, and a beautiful Valentine gift at the same time!

So instead of telling the doctors that we would push through for intubation, I just reported na, "Doc, gising na po si Tatay!". I saw how his team of doctors and nurses were in awe.

WHAT'S ON MY MIND?

First, I couldn't help but wonder why God performed this miracle right after we lifted everything to Him? Why not BEFORE?

"SINUBOK KA LANG KUNG SAAN KA KAKAPIT, NAK..."

Nanay Nora blurted this out after what happened.

This line struck me to the core. The following day, Ate Aby shared the same realization, too.

Siguro nga ito lang yung move na iniintay sa amin ni Lord before He demonstrates His power. If we didn't feel helpless or weak, we wouldn't be turning desperately to God.

I realized that before we're afraid to give him up. Baka nga kaya kami masyadong nababagabag kasi takot at kinulang nga siguro kami sa pagtitiwala.

Ni hindi namin kayang sabihin yung linyang "Bahala ka na Lord". We only used to say this para sa mga taong walang puso.

Perhaps, we are just looking at the cross, too focused on the hardships that we just walked by sight not by faith.

Now, we felt that we had been tested for our faith to be strengthened. Sinubok lang ni Lord yung faith, trust, katatagan at foundation ng aming pamilya. And at times, He chose to remain silent inorder to see where shall we put our faith and trust.

Second, Where does your strength come from?

A question commonly asked by my friends and relatives.

As I was pondering this over the entire process, my only answer boils down to this: " I never give up on people that I love even if I would suffer a lot." Mabigat pero kinaya kasi niyakap ko nalang sya. It's not the weight of the cross, but I think it's in the way I handled it that matters.

All the pain and sleepless nights were all worth it seeing that Tatay's condition was improving in leaps and bounds.

Since I witnessed Tatay's miracle, my heart began to open up; I started to carrying the cross lightly, and in doing so, Jesus wiped away my fears, worries, and filled me with hope everyday.

Plus, the song "Oceans" by Hillsong had become my fight song while was the verse from Psalm 46:10, "Be still and know that I am God" had become my anchor during my rock-bottom moments. Thanks to Father Jerry Orbos' online healing mass for reminding me of this life verse once again. This was exactly the verse na kinapitan ko simula nung gumising si Tatay. Ito ang muling nagpaalaala sakin na kumikilos ang Dyos as if God is saying, "Kalma, AKO na toh".

Jesus is ever faithful and unfailing; He will always be with you no matter what happens.

TAPOS NA ANG KWARESMA.

As we celebrate the resurrection of the Risen Jesus today, my fam believe that our Easter has also arrived and come out, too...as we have learned to embrace the cross with Jesus beside us and trusted that this pain is just one part of a greater and glorious story.

I've made a lot of mistakes in the past. I'm not the religious type who goes to the church every Sunday. I am not the perfect daughter, but while I have breath, I will always praise, glorify and remain faithful to You, Our Resurrected King! Amen!

Salamat po sa buhay at biyaya! ❤️

[ae-diaries]

Watch "fav lyrics that kills you inside" on YouTube

[ae-diaries]

My Quarantreat

[ae-diaries]

MY COVID-19 JOURNEY

The month of September was a rain of tears for me. It had me weather-beaten because of a certain crisis situation. But before this, I had already been dreaming of a raging sea that was dragging me deeper into the brink of fear. I guess this probably reflects my current state. I was languishing and drowning by the gusting of winds and waves. Unrelenting stress and pressures kept piling me up lately. Being part of that sandwich generation, I couldn't seem to find my balance. No matter what I do, I would always end up becoming a worrier and an overthinker...so much that it's preventing me from sleeping soundly at night and waking up the next morning feeling tired already. Nurturing these emotions constantly took a toll on my immune system. In my weakest state, Covid-19 hit me. That dream made sense to me now. I believe it was a warning of the storm that was about to blow me. I shook my head in disbelief. Is this Covid-19 for real?”

But then, I experienced its symptoms; I got a fever, conjunctivitis, cough, and congested nose. My loss of taste and smell went to the moon. But you know what? I was even more paralyzed by fear knowing that my entire family and my co-workers were at risk. Sigurado naman akong mataas ang adversity quotient ko, but at that time, I had panic attacks. Anything can happen. And it goes fast. Naglabasan lahat ng weakness ko. Nakalimutan kong SIW ako because of a series of rock bottom moments.

First, my family suffered from tremendous stress, tense episodes, and emotional trauma. (Save this for another story).

Second, the school operation was stuck in limbo.

Third, it was mental torture. Isa sa pinakainatake ng virus is my mental state. Dito mo talaga masusubok how mentally strong you are to mitigate the social stigma and the like. Sabi nga ng ate ko, "It's a mind over matter lang yan". Just beat the hell out of it by rising above negativities. Nasa pagdadala yan, whether you carry it light or heavy. I had a good look at anxiety.

Fourth, Did I question God? Nope, because I know it will serve His purpose. In fact, I ACCEPTED IT. I'd rather be the one to suffer instead of 'them'. BUT, it was hard to seek God. I was kind of isolating myself. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko Sya lalapitan. Nahihiya ako for I'm no better. I had spiritual dryness and felt too 'busy' that I've got disconnected from Him, again. Ang hirap kumonnect.

SO HOW DOES HEALING HAPPEN?

Disclaimer: I'm not a physician but I'd like to share some prescriptions that helped me recover. The solution was simple: I focused on what I can control.

1. I made a self-care routine when they brought me to the quafac. For example, I replenished my energy tank by working on what's best for my body. Kinareer ko talaga ang self-medication like taking home remedies, 1,500 mg of vitamins C with Zinc, drinking more water, getting enough sunlight as vitamin D, eating fruits, 'suob' and Zumba to strengthen my immune system.

2. I had mind detox. I did everything to amuse myself: taking photos, experimenting with Tiktok, binge-watching Netflix (as usual), vocalizing, listening to podcasts, staying connected with my fam, friends, and colleagues (online), removing myself from the equation, thinking less, and ignoring mental garbages.

3. My quarantine gave me the time to meet my spiritual needs. I immersed myself daily by watching inspirational talks (vlogs, holy mass, etc.) on YT I knew would help me. And dito nagkaron ng turnaround, I felt God was speaking to me the moment Bo Sanchez, (in his interview with Toni Gonzaga) uttered the line, "MY CHILD COME CLOSER". Para akong tinusok! It was so compelling that I broke down uncontrollably. I felt Jesus rushing towards me to embrace and tell me that He is longing to reconnect with me; that He would break through the many walls I have built. I know it sounds so cliché but His voice saved me and take away my sufferings. Bakit nga ba ako lumayo? It is during the hard times nga pala na dapat mas lumalapit ako sa Panginoon gaya ng sinasabi ng BFF ko. And in between my cries, I took a step back and told myself, "I want to be close to you. Use me, Lord, so I can serve more!".

I believe it's His invitation for me to pause, feel my feelings before God, and zoom on my faith.

MY SUFFERING BECOMES MY PLACE OF SURRENDER

Isolation can be a place of solitude.

And when I entrusted and surrender everything to God, yung attachments and worries ko naging unimportant. I thought mas babayuhin ang pag-iisip ko pagdating ko sa facility but I realized I was anxious for nothing. I found myself just listening to life's testimonials and praying for optimal healing in mind and body for everyone affected by this crisis. I returned to the basics. Yung fear, anxiety, and guilt pinalitan ni Lord ng gratitude and grace. This was evident on the 10th day of my quarantine, I dreamt of the same scenario, but this time, I was gazing at the calmest of the sea. As I turned around, I saw a huge infinity pool and a lot of waterfalls. Everything was clear and still. That was very symbolic of how God's grace substitutes my fear. Then, I woke up feeling so relieved and grateful because I've finally found clarity in all these. I realized that no storms last forever. I haven't rowed through the storm alone. He's already rowing the boat for me even before I know it. And He used my circle of support as instruments - my fam, relatives, friends, former students, teacher friends, concerned colleagues at iba pang mga taong nagmalasakit outside my bubble to heal me. Their prayers, kindness, and empathy have blessed me and leave a lasting impact on my core.

To everyone reading this, I know this may not be that important to you, but I just still wanted to share the process that I had been through in hopes that it can somehow help others who are going through the same experience. Besides, writing this down in my journal is very therapeutic for me.

I also encourage you not to let your guard down. As they say, let's not wait for something bad to happen before we learn to appreciate the good. Our lives are fragile. Anytime, it can snap. Kailangan nating tukuran ang sarili and prioritize our physical health and sanity.

The gospel of Matthew says that when you feel like drowning in sorrow, know that Jesus walks on water. He will rescue you.

As I look back, I suddenly remember yung mga past storms na itinawid ako ng Dyos.

He is the same God who was with me in the past and is still going to be with me in this battle. Di ko man kontrolado ang pangyayari 'cause I'm still dealing with my post-Covid condition, but I know that GOD IS IN CONTROL. And in His time, this too shall pass.

Looking back, it is humbling to say that this is just another chapter in my success story.

Days at the quafac

[ae-diaries]

[ae-diaries]

““Appreciate hard times. Someday they’ll be just another chapter in your success story.” - Unknown ”

—

[ae-diaries]

Surround yourself with high vibrational individuals. Ones who will support your passion. Ones who will have your back not only during brightest days but in dark moments. ❤️

[ae-diaries]

[ae-diaries]

[ae-diaries]

If I was a superhero, I would be 'The Flash' (From a Netflix show). I will be a time stop person. I need this skill because time is my greatest ally. As they say, time is precious, so, I want to make the most of my time to love myself, invest in my relationships and create good memories. My experiences in life taught me that life is too short, and so with this magic, I will have more chances to keep progressing and do the things I have not done before: I want to teach students in schools again; affirm my colleagues; treat my parents - bring them to concerts and resto; spend midnight snacks and watch Netflix shows/movies with my siblings; hang-out with friends; reunite with a long lost friend; restore a broken relationship, forgive someone, stop spreading diseases and kill the virus.

With the current pandemic, I do not get enough time, and I need that power not just to be invisible or flyable, but to physically and psychologically heal men and serve my community. This is a mindset which I believe to be useful to the world and which will lead to beneficial changes.

My greatest source of motivation is the Lord and the people around me. Giving back to the community became my compass, my new prime to create a better tomorrow for the bigger whole. Pope Francis once said "Life is good when you are happy; but much better when others are happy because of you."

[ae-diaries]

My MUSICAL JOURNEY

True to me the saying, ‘when words fail, music speaks.’ There is something about melody, sounds, and lyrics that seems to express my innermost thoughts and emotions.

Singing has always been my favorite hobby. I consider myself an old soul trapped in a millennial body when it comes to listening to my Spotify playlist of ‘The Queen', Michael Jackson, and Air Supply. They made me love pop, ballad, and rock music even more. In my free time, I usually sing my heart’s content using the ‘WeSing’ app. This is a karaoke software app that can record my performances on every favorite song. It helps me continuously improve my voice, lowers my stress levels, and uplifts my mood. While I dreamt of becoming exceptionally talented and popular like Ms. Regine Velasquez-Alcasid someday. She is my ultimate idol and my major influence in music. I see her as not only a great diva, but a huge inspiration. I grew up singing her signature songs.

I remember when I was in elementary, my teacher incidentally heard me belting and imitating Regine’s voice inside the classroom, and from that moment, my life was symbolized by the ‘microphone’. I never imagined that I would be given a break to showcase my talent in front of many people because back then, I felt I was ‘voiceless’ as a kid; I thought that I had no talent to offer.

By age eleven (11), I was already singing in public, rendering intermission numbers in school, and participating in various singing contests in our town. I used to sing the contest pieces of legendary singers like Celine Dion, Mariah Carey, and Whitney Houston.

Sharing the joy of singing enriched my life far beyond the notes and music. I got to widen my circle of friends as I had been able to meet a new breed of awesome people who are now my friends. The delights of singing with them go beyond merely enjoying the beauty of my vocal talent.

My father had been very instrumental in my musical journey. He served as my mentor and my number one supporter, who would have me joined the choir when I was in high school; enrolled me in voice lessons and immersed my neck-deep in seawater to nurture my talent. Sometimes, however, I failed in contests and received criticisms. I remember coming home empty-handed. But despite all my struggles, I remained thankful and motivated because there was never a time, I saw my father get tired of supporting and believing me. The proud look I saw in his face every time I hold the microphone and sing overwhelmed my soul. It was worth it seeing him happy. I realized how blessed I was. I might not have won them all, but there is no greater feeling of happiness when you are ‘valued’ by my loved ones. It was the surest win in any contest.

For what it's worth, this collective experience molded me into who I am today. My love for music helped me develop not just my talent, but also a healthy amount of self-esteem. It gave me the courage to keep progressing. It taught me that I must pick myself up after every fall because life is about not giving up. This is one emotional chapter I would treasure for the rest of my life. It gave me the 'voice' enough to make my parents proud, entertain and inspire others in my own little way.

[ae-diaries]

[ae-diaries]

My Life at 30. 😍

Since the lockdown started, I make the most of my 'me' time reflecting on the significant milestones that happened in my life. I believe the best thing we can do to stand against this pandemic is to constantly pray, reflect, and remember how blessed we still are.

I realized, now in my early 30s, that my life has been defined by the journeys I take, not the destination I want to reach.

I don't know what destination will I end up in the long run. At some point I felt lost - far from getting where and who I want to be. I haven't reached my destination yet. But there's one thing I'm sure of - I'm enjoying every inch of my journey, from the simplest, most ordinary experiences of each day (Even the most complicated ones).

I decided to write this, not to brag but to inspire someone (somehow) to get a kick out of life. May you find joy in your journey and fall in love with the process because life is too beautiful to miss out.

MILESTONE 1:

PROFESSIONAL GROWTH and ACHIEVEMENTS

"Never stop learning, because life never stops teaching". Anon

2002 - Graduated as 'First Honorable Mention' of batch 2001-2002 at Magahis Elem. School.

2006 - Graduated as Class Valedictorian of batch 2005-2006 and became the recipient of 'EXEMPLARY BEHAVIOR AWARD' (The most significant award I received in my whole life) at Divine Word School of Semirara

2011- Obtained my Bachelors degree in Secondary Education Major in English from Pasig Catholic College.

Awards/Honors received in college:

~Academic Scholar (First year college) ~Dean's Lister (2nd sem - Third year college) ~SPECIAL ACADEMIC AWARD (Awarded on graduation day)

July 2011 - I got my first job as an Online ESL instructress to Korean students at English Language Studies International in Ortigas, Pasig City.

March 2012 - I passed the (L.E.T) Licensure Examination for Teachers.

Photos taken during LET Tribute @PCC

May 2013 - Resigned from my first job and pursued my first teaching career in Pasig Catholic College (My Alma Mater).

On my third year, I became one of the recipients of GAWAD GURONG GENYO AWARD (3rd & 4th qtrs only).

August 2015 - Got admitted to Loyola Schools of Graduate Studies at Ateneo De Manila University, my dream school.

May 2016 - Explored the BPO world and worked as CSR (Customer Service Representative) at Transcom Worldwide in Tiendesitas, Pasig City.

October 2016 - Became one of the 'FAB FIVE AGENTS' for the month of October.

December 2016 - Got promoted as CSM (Customer Service Manager).

May 2017 - Resigned from my previous job and transferred to Batangas (my hometown) to pursue what I love most - to teach in public school this time. I was hired in SHS in Tuy.

June 2017 - present - My cup overflows with variety of inputs and worthwhile experiences I gained from attending numerous regional, national & international seminars and conferences.

Sept. 17-18, 2019 - Selected as an ORAL PRESENTER at DCBER 2019 (District Conference of Basic Education Researchers) held @ Batangas Country Club.

2. ADVOCATE of FinED (Financial Education)

(1) Becoming one of DepEd's curriculum writer was indeed a humbling experience; it gave me the perfect opportunity to make an impact with. I'm blessed to have worked with brilliant professionals and accomplished the ff. tasks:

>integrated core messages of FLE to the existing K to12 curriculum across grade level;

>developed, validated and finalized lesson exemplars of Financial Literacy modules;

>drafted policy on the Integration of Financial Literacy Education;

>developed Monitoring and Evaluation Tool on the Integration of Financial Education in the K to 12 Curriculum.

Note: Integration is on its way. Soon enough, the seeds we've planted shall be harvested in due time.

(2) My article titled "The Road to Financial Freedom" was published at INSTABRIGHT e-Gazette online magazine/ISSN: 2704-3010, Volume I, Issue I, August 2019. Available online at www.instabrightgazette.strikingly.com